255. Bryony Deery: On Postpartum Recovery, Hormone Crashes, Birth Preparation & Pregnancy Fitness

The moment you become a mother, a version of you emerges that you’ve never met before, and she’s more powerful, more sensitive, and more focused than anyone you’ve ever been. Today, I’m with Bryony Deery for the second time to explore what really happens to a woman’s identity, priorities, and emotional range after birth, including the surprising neuroscience behind why mothers seem to “just know” what their baby needs before anyone else does. Bryony also gets brutally honest about the bounce-back pressure, the intrusive thoughts no one talks about, and why giving yourself grace isn’t weakness, it’s biology. CLICK HERE TO BECOME GARYS VIP!: https://bit.ly/4ai0Xwg Listen to "Beyond the Mat Podcast" on all your favorite platforms! YouTube: https://bit.ly/4st5wMv Spotify: https://bit.ly/4t2O3KS Apple Podcasts: https://bit.ly/4rKLGv1 Connect with Bryony Deery Website: https://bit.ly/3PFzMoZ YouTube: https://bit.ly/3PV1gXG Instagram: https://bit.ly/47lVaps TikTok: https://bit.ly/47L1qHm LinkedIn: https://bit.ly/47fnABn Thank you to our partners A-GAME: “ULTIMATE15” FOR 15% OFF: http://bit.ly/4kek1ij AION: “ULTIMATE10” FOR 10% OFF: https://bit.ly/4h6KHAD AIRES: "ULTIMATE20 " FOR 20% OFF: https://bit.ly/4a3Duze BAJA GOLD: "ULTIMATE10" FOR 10% OFF: https://bit.ly/3WSBqUa BODYHEALTH: “ULTIMATE20” FOR 20% OFF: http://bit.ly/4e5IjsV CARAWAY: “ULTIMATE” FOR 10% OFF: https://bit.ly/3Q1VmkC COLD LIFE: THE ULTIMATE HUMAN PLUNGE: https://bit.ly/4eULUKp GENETIC METHYLATION TEST (UK ONLY): https://bit.ly/48QJJrk GENETIC TEST (USA ONLY): ⁠https://bit.ly/3Yg1Uk9 GOPUFF: GET YOUR FAVORITE SNACK!: https://bit.ly/4obIFDC H2TABS: “ULTIMATE10” FOR 10% OFF: https://bit.ly/4hMNdgg HEALF: 10% OFF YOUR ORDER: https://bit.ly/41HJg6S PEPTUAL: “TUH10” FOR 10% OFF: https://bit.ly/4mKxgcn RHO NUTRITION: “ULTIMATE15” FOR 15% OFF: https://bit.ly/44fFza0 SNOOZE: LET’S GET TO SLEEP!: https://bit.ly/4pt1T6V WHOOP: JOIN & GET 1 FREE MONTH!: https://bit.ly/3VQ0nzW Watch the “Ultimate Human Podcast” every Tuesday & Thursday at 9AM EST: YouTube: https://bit.ly/3RPQYX8 Podcasts: https://bit.ly/3RQftU0 Connect with Gary Brecka Instagram: https://bit.ly/3RPpnFs TikTok: https://bit.ly/4coJ8fo X: https://bit.ly/3Opc8tf Facebook: https://bit.ly/464VA1H LinkedIn: https://bit.ly/4hH7Ri2 Website: https://bit.ly/4eLDbdU Merch: https://bit.ly/4aBpOM1 Newsletter: https://bit.ly/47ejrws Ask Gary: https://bit.ly/3PEAJuG Timestamps 00:00 ​Intro of Show 02:50 Bryony’s Birthing Plan 08:56 Experience after Birthing 17:53 “Bouncing Back” Post-Pregnancy 23:53 Post-Birth: Preparations and Identity Shift 28:19 Women’s Intuition: Sensitivity to Frequency 34:11 Bryony’s Fitness Protocol after Pregnancy 41:56 Diet Change, Breastfeeding, Hormone Therapy 46:30 The Truth about Female Hormone Therapy 48:07 Bryony’s Postpartum Meals and Supplementation 53:17 Male’s Role in Pregnancy 1:02:55 Parenting Advice from Bryony 1:07:01 What does it mean to you to be an Ultimate Human? Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and does not provide medical advice. It is not intended for diagnosing or treating any health condition. Always consult a licensed healthcare professional before making health or wellness decisions. Gary Brecka is the owner of Ultimate Human, LLC which operates The Ultimate Human podcast and promotes certain third-party products used by Gary Brecka in his personal health and wellness protocols and daily life and for which Ultimate Human LLC and / or Gary Brecka directly or indirectly holds an economic interest or receives compensation. Accordingly, statements made by Gary Brecka and others (including on The Ultimate Human podcast) may be considered Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  We prepare during pregnancy for the baby and we don't do anything for us. You are so depleted after birth. So the more you do for yourself during pregnancy, the more prepared you are post-birth, which is when you need it.

• 0:11Gary Brecka?

  Don't think about conditioning for pregnancy, but I mean, this is arguably the single hardest physical event that a woman will ever go through.

• 0:18Speaker 00

  Imagine what the female body is going through. All of a sudden, you're so depleted, you're exhausted, you've given birth, your hormones are just completely all over the place. And then you're like, oh my God, I have to care for this tiny human being.

• 0:31Gary Brecka?

  Every aspect of life changes. You change who you are, but by choice.

• 0:35Speaker 00

  At the end of the day, I'm a believer of you should really tune into what feels right for you and do exactly that.

• 0:43Gary Brecka?

  For all of the young soon to be moms out there, what if any advice would you give?

• 0:49Speaker 00

  One thing that I think is helpful, and I wish I was kind of told this more is that.

• 1:07Gary Brecka?

  Hey guys, welcome back to the Ultimate Human Podcast. I'm your host, human biologist Gary Brecka, where we go down the road of everything, anti-aging, biohacking, longevity, and everything in between. And today's guest, very special guest, back on the podcast for the same time. I have to tell you that when we announced this second podcast, it was the highest level of interest we had in all of 2025. And I had some big guests on in 2025. So this area of interest in prepartum, postpartum, pregnancy, bouncing back, and all things surrounding pregnancy, hormones, and life was just such a level of interest. So welcome back to the podcast.

• 1:48Speaker 00

  Thank you so much. I'm so shocked to hear that.

• 1:51Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 1:52Speaker 00

  But yeah, it's such an interesting topic. So yeah, I'm so happy we're doing this.

• 1:56Gary Brecka?

  It really is. And I, and I think, you know, the, the more that I've been doing podcasting and sort of taking audience feedback and getting, you know, where are the levels of interest that I should, you know, steer so that I'm really serving my audience.

• 2:09Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:10Gary Brecka?

  You know, there, there's an enormous area of interest in, in female hormone therapy and, and menopause. And there is an enormous area of interest. Seems like the whole world's getting pregnant right now, including in my company, right? We're like baby number three. And I have a very small team. But just such a paucity of information and women really being willing to get out there and be vulnerable and, you know, talk about the nuts and bolts of pregnancy, the do's and don'ts, some of the, you know, things that surprise them. So I'm really excited for this podcast for my female audience.

• 2:47Speaker 00

  Yeah, I'm so excited. Thank you.

• 2:49Gary Brecka?

  I, I wonder if you might just share your, your birthing plan, if you had one.

• 2:57Speaker 00

  So this is quite funny because I had planned a C-section, which surprises people. I don't know why that surprises people, but it does.

• 3:08Gary Brecka?

  It's convenient. Then you can be one o'clock on Tuesday.

• 3:11Speaker 00

  Exactly. And I think it was funny because I was not really, weirdly, I didn't feel afraid of the pain, but I felt afraid of the lack of control. So for me, and also we, we live in Denmark most of the time. So we were coming back to London to have our baby. So I just kind of wanted that control of knowing when, what time, all the things. And then, so I, I didn't consider anything because I thought, well, it's going to be very controlled, all is well. And about eight, 10, no, 10 days before, I changed my mind. And I said, I'm gonna have a natural birth. Or I don't know, some people say all births are natural. I agree. So vaginal birth, I think

• 3:54Speaker 00

  I should say. So vaginal birth. So yeah, I just last minute changed my mind and I had no preparation, not one bit of preparation. And I thought, I can do this. There was something that I went for a scan and I knew, I knew she was gonna, our baby was gonna come early. I knew it. I could feel she was coming like quite.

• 4:15Gary Brecka?

  Intuition.

• 4:15Speaker 00

  Yeah. So I said, I know I can do this. I know that my body can do it. And I wanted to just give it a go. So then to prepare, so my birth plan was essentially 10 days. And in that 10 days, I did some things that I think are really fundamental that. No one talks about, and I think are really beneficial. So one of those things was a a thing called the epino. Have you heard of it?

• 4:40Gary Brecka?

  Epino? No.

• 4:41Speaker 00

  No. So you know what an episiotomy is? So it essentially is no episiotomy. Okay. So you put a balloon inside you. You pump it up, you hold it for ten fifteen minutes and you breathe it out. And every day you go bigger and bigger and bigger. So you essentially stretch yourself.

• 5:03Gary Brecka?

  Right.

• 5:04Speaker 00

  And no, I've never heard anyone talk about it. And it's it's unbelievable. Not only physically, because I didn't tear, I didn't have stitches, I didn't have any of those things. And I had a big baby, you know, she was eight pound six.

• 5:18Gary Brecka?

  Oh, my goodness.

• 5:19Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 5:19Gary Brecka?

  Eight pound six?

• 5:20Speaker 00

  Yes. And

• 5:22Gary Brecka?

  Healthy girl.

• 5:22Speaker 00

  Yeah, she was a healthy baby.

• 5:25Gary Brecka?

  She walked out.

• 5:26Speaker 00

  Yeah, exactly. But I really think mentally, it it was like a form of visualization for my birth. I was like in mental training for those ten days.

• 5:38Gary Brecka?

  Wow.

• 5:39Speaker 00

  So I knew what to do. I I had been there before. It was familiar to me because I had done it with the balloon, which is crazy to say, because a balloon is not a baby. It's very different. But the feeling like it was familiar in some way. So you essentially use your breath work to breathe this balloon out. So, yeah, it was amazing.

• 5:59Gary Brecka?

  Wow. Did you, and if there's anything uncomfortable to ask, then by all means.

• 6:04Speaker 00

  Ask everything and anything.

• 6:07Gary Brecka?

  So did you have an epidural?

• 6:09Speaker 00

  Yes. So that's another thing. So I had an epidural, but they did, I don't know, because a few of my friends have had different experiences where they kind of give you all the epidural in one go. I had top ups, like very gradual top up. So I still wanted to be aware of when my contractions were happening. Don't ask me why, but I just had this theory that if I could breathe in line with my contractions, that would help my body. Because if you're a lot of women I had spoken to had said they didn't feel they didn't know when to push when they had an epidural. And I had this theory that that would then cause the tearing because

• 6:49Speaker 00

  If you're pushing for so long, you're more likely to tear. Whereas if like the contraction is kind of your internal push, isn't it? So if you're breathing and pushing with that in line with that, I pushed for twenty one minutes.

• 7:02Gary Brecka?

  Wow.

• 7:03Speaker 00

  And she was out.

• 7:04Gary Brecka?

  That is phenomenal.

• 7:05Speaker 00

  Yeah. So I just want to tell everyone about that because I think it's unbelievable. The Epino that I used and I really think that that helped.

• 7:12Gary Brecka?

  Epino, I have seen.

• 7:13Speaker 00

  And the top up. So I, I, I didn't go all in with the epidural. I felt every contraction. I was telling my, my doctors, incredible Claire Mellon in, in the Portland. She's unbelievable. But I was telling her, I'm pushing now because I have, I feel a contraction versus most of her patients, she told me, don't, you know, want to not feel anything. So you're kind of trying to figure out when the contractions are. So yeah, that was it. That's a big tip, I would say.

• 7:41Gary Brecka?

  That's, that's, first of all, I've never heard of either of those. And I didn't know that you could top up epidurals. I mean, I, I haven't had three babies. My former spouse had three babies with me.

• 7:50Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 7:51Gary Brecka?

  Um, but, uh, that period was hours and hours long. Who wasn't, it certainly, and she had an epidural every time. And, but it certainly wasn't twenty one minutes.

• 8:03Speaker 00

  No, I mean, the, well, the pushing part was twenty minutes, twenty one minutes. You can be in labor with the contractions for a lot longer.

• 8:10Gary Brecka?

  No, but I mean, really just the birthing part was, and at some point they.

• 8:14Speaker 00

  And that's exhausting.

• 8:15Gary Brecka?

  Began to give her like, um, inducing drugs like the pitocin and other things to really kind of assist it. She was so exhausted. I just remember being so wiped out.

• 8:24Speaker 00

  I mean, imagine what the female body is going through. It is such, and my husband describes it as like a physical fight that you're going through in that, that time. And it can go on for so long. And then all of a sudden, you're so depleted, you're exhausted, you've given birth, your hormones are just completely all over the place. And then you're like, oh my God, I have to care for this tiny human being. So.

• 8:48Gary Brecka?

  Not so tiny in your case.

• 8:49Speaker 00

  Yeah, exactly. Giant baby in the hospital.

• 8:54Gary Brecka?

  Yeah. You know, I'm always fascinated by, um, I've read a lot of things about, you know, the, the baby's first few minutes into the world. Right. And because obviously they're going from a fluid environment to, um, in a womb to outside of the womb, there's air, there's lights, you know, I mean, that, that transition must be mind numbing. It's like, you know, waking up from hibernation. And the real impact and that it has on the nervous system of the baby, um, to very soon after birth, be in contact with the mother. And so I, I wonder if you, you walk us through that first just two or three minutes.

• 9:35Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 9:35Gary Brecka?

  Right. I mean, immediately after birth, was your husband present?

• 9:39Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 9:39Gary Brecka?

  Okay. So he was there too. I passed out.

• 9:43Speaker 00

  I don't blame you.

• 9:44Gary Brecka?

  Tougher guy than I am. I mean, I got, I didn't completely go out, but I got woozy and I had to actually sit down. I wanted to stand up there, but it did cut the cord for, for all my kids. And it's, it's such a miraculous process. I, I get emotional even thinking about it. And any father or their, their mother that's been through it probably would too, because it's just such a miracle. When we talked about this before the podcast started, you know, the more I study physiology, the more I just believe in God, like it's, and, and we don't need to go that direction, but I mean, the, the miracle birth, it, it just can't be random, in my opinion. It just doesn't happen by accident.

• 10:26Gary Brecka?

  But walk us through that first few minutes, like right out, out of the womb.

• 10:31Speaker 00

  Yeah. So I think it's so important to say, because one thing I had in my head, which we're told, is the second your baby's here, you are gonna feel like the world stops. You're madly in love, your, your baby's gonna look at you, you're gonna look at the baby. It's just this magical moment and it is a magical miracle moment for sure. But there are also other things going on that it's a lot to deal with. You know, you have just, as I said, you know, I pushed out this huge baby and you're, you're so in shock. Like I really think you, most people go into a state of shock and disbelief. And then all of a sudden you're handed this baby and you're like,

• 11:16Speaker 00

  You're like, oh, my God, what's just happened? You're still processing what you've just been through. So I would say that one thing that I think is helpful, and I wish I was kind of told this more, is that it's also okay that you feel like you need a minute the second your baby arrives.

• 11:35Gary Brecka?

  Oh, that's good.

• 11:36Speaker 00

  It's also okay. Give yourself some grace, give your husband some grace, your partner, because you're, but you've both just been through this crazy moment, no matter how, you know, I, I am so lucky with my labor. It was, it was amazing in so many ways, but it was still such an unbelievable moment that you have to go through. And then, you know, I, I think the bonding happened, you know, as time went on, the next, every hour, the love grew. It wasn't, I had, so, you know, it, it's a funny, funny one to kind of put into words because you feel, oh, my God, this is my baby, I'm gonna take care of you forever, I love you so much.

• 12:18Speaker 00

  But you then feel, okay, I'm getting to know you, you're getting to know me, I'm getting to know myself as a mom as well. And that takes time, and that's okay, doesn't mean you have postpartum depression, doesn't mean you're a bad mom, doesn't mean your baby's gonna get taken away. These are all valid feelings, you know? But we tell ourselves, you know, the world stops and then Mozart starts playing and then.

• 12:44Gary Brecka?

  Feel this and then I don't.

• 12:45Speaker 00

  Exactly, and then that fucks you up. Because you're like, oh, my God, I don't, and then you keep it to yourself, I don't, I'm not feeling the way everyone's telling me you should feel. And so, yeah, I would say it definitely, now, it's unbelievable, because, you know, I've firstly, I've had a shower since then. I've like collected myself, I feel like I've, you know, had a sleep and things, you're so, at the end of pregnancy, I was so sleep deprived.

• 13:11Gary Brecka?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 13:12Speaker 00

  It's unbelievable. So as the days go on, you just are just so madly in love with your baby that it's unbelievable. But I would just, I want to be honest with that and share that it's okay if you don't feel this like romanticized version of birth.

• 13:27Gary Brecka?

  Hmm, you know, I'm so glad you said that, because I don't know if I've ever confessed this in my life, but my, my, so I have three kids, and my oldest is a girl, um, she's twenty seven now, but I still remember the birthing process and, and, and then when we got home.

• 13:45Gary Brecka?

  Um, I felt so guilty because I felt like somebody else's baby was in the house. Like, I was like, is somebody gonna come pick this thing up?

• 13:53Speaker 00

  Now, I have a feeling like someone thinks I'm gonna, I've stolen this baby.

• 13:57Gary Brecka?

  Yeah. And, and um, for me, it was like seventy two hours.

• 14:03Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 14:03Gary Brecka?

  And then, whoosh.

• 14:06Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 14:06Gary Brecka?

  Um, and I didn't go through anything nearly what you went through or my, uh, my former spouse went through. But I remember kind of looking at my daughter even, um, in, in the crib. And yes, I felt detached and like, I loved her, but I didn't feel that.

• 14:23Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 14:23Gary Brecka?

  Mozart-esque.

• 14:25Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 14:25Gary Brecka?

  Like, romanticized version of even how our father was supposed to feel. It was three or four days.

• 14:32Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 14:33Gary Brecka?

  And then, like a biological nuclear weapon. And then it was, and it's been over ever since, right?

• 14:40Speaker 00

  Exactly. And probably like as time grows, you just, you, you're like, how can I possibly love them more? But you do.

• 14:47Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 14:47Speaker 00

  But you're, it's so good that you say that because I think more people need to say that it's actually more like survival mode. When you've just had your baby and your baby's in this world, you're firstly, you're trying to make sure that, that you're so panicked that, I mean, you have these crazy intrusive thoughts, like, I remember.

• 15:06Gary Brecka?

  Crazy intrusive thoughts?

• 15:07Speaker 00

  It's, no, you do it.

• 15:09Gary Brecka?

  My wife uses that term.

• 15:10Speaker 00

  It is. It's so, and, and you know what? The more I say it, the more women say to me, oh, my God, I had the same thing.

• 15:15Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 15:16Speaker 00

  It's really a thing. And I, and I had heard it a couple of times, but experiencing it like it's, um, it's, it's unbelievable. The thoughts that go through your head, like my friend, um, when we got back from the hospital had filled Elle's room with balloons on the ceiling. So sweet. And at the nighttime, I was like, oh my God, what if those, um, what if those balloons somehow go down into the crib? And, you know, all these stupid things that you would never think. Um, but yeah, you're just, your mind goes crazy and you're in survival and you're, you're, you're like a lioness protecting your. Like little cup.

• 15:52Gary Brecka?

  If your energy is low during the day, the problem usually started the night before. Sleep affects focus, mood, metabolism, literally everything. And most people never learn how to properly support it. Our free sleep challenge is April 29th and 30th, and it's designed to teach the basics of better sleep in a way that's realistic and easy to apply. If learning how to sleep better feels like the right place to start, we'd love to have you join our challenge on April 29th. Now let's get back to the Ultimate Human Podcast. Yeah, I think it's so good that you, you know, tell mothers to give themselves grace. So how long were you in the hospital?

• 16:29Speaker 00

  So I was in the hospital for, um, so there's a story that we were, the labor for the, for the birth, one night and two days. And we were ready to leave and then I suddenly had a lot of pain. So I essentially, I had a big blood clot.

• 16:52Speaker 00

  Which can happen during birth, but mine was quite large. So they were thinking about doing a surgery rather than, because you can take something where it naturally passes. I had like the way, way, way worse than labor. I had the pain, yeah.

• 17:08Gary Brecka?

  It was worse than labor?

• 17:09Speaker 00

  Way worse, like the worst pain of my life. So anyway, um, my doctor removed it with her hands after I had given birth. So that was something.

• 17:22Speaker 00

  And so I just had, I was like, come on, let's go. And we, I was doing, I was listening to positive affirmations, the whole birth, the whole thing. And, um, I just put my headphones in, I had a bit of gas in it and she just manually removed it with her hands and it was crazy.

• 17:37Gary Brecka?

  And then did it stop just like that?

• 17:39Speaker 00

  Just like that. The pain, yeah.

• 17:41Gary Brecka?

  So now you're on your way home.

• 17:43Speaker 00

  Oh yeah. So then, then literally stopped just like that. I stayed an extra night so that they could monitor and then I went home and then back with the baby.

• 17:51Gary Brecka?

  So you know, what I, what I think is a journey that very few women talk about is, is, you know, immediately, um, post-birth, you know, um, maybe the guilt of saying, okay, now I want to bounce back too.

• 18:04Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah.

• 18:05Gary Brecka?

  Um, and, you know, I want to get back the body that I had. I want to get back to feeling like I had, maybe being active again. Um, but now you have this, this infant and you know, there's, there's an interesting, um, phenomenon that happens with women. It's called caregiver syndrome. And if you look at, uh, the category, for example, of autoimmune disease, 82% of autoimmune disease is found in women. And, and the reason why is not because autoimmune disease is selective by sex, it's selective by weakness. And, and they have surmised that women have a tendency to develop this, uh, pattern of behavior called caregiver syndrome, where they put the needs of everyone else before the needs of themselves.

• 18:48Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 18:48Gary Brecka?

  So it's their spouse and their children, um, you know, it's their coworkers, their career, their girlfriends, whatever it is. And over time, this has consequences because they don't engage in self-care. Very often they think that self-care is selfish. Like they won't give themselves maybe the first, first 30 minutes of the day or 60 minutes of the day because they're like, I have so many other people that rely on me that I need to take care of. And so I wonder if, you know, right after birth, you have this infant at home, was it one of those intrusive thoughts that maybe I feel guilty that I actually want to get my pre-pregnancy body back? I want to, I need some actual me time. Um, I've been at this for months.

• 19:28Speaker 00

  Exactly.

• 19:29Gary Brecka?

  Walk us through.

• 19:30Speaker 00

  Well, it's, it's really interesting because there's this narrative of, especially kind of in the, in the wellness space, like you're, you're scrutinized for saying, like this bounce back thing is. In some ways, it can be very, um, I feel like quite conflicted about the bounce back phrase because I totally understand the narrative of you don't bounce back because you're this new person. And you know, it's not realistic and don't put that pressure on yourself. Like I so get that. And it's crazy what the female body goes through. But at the same time, I don't think you should feel bad for wanting to bounce back in inverted commas.

• 20:14Speaker 00

  Because that's okay too. Like it's okay to have physical goals.

• 20:18Gary Brecka?

  Right.

• 20:18Speaker 00

  Which make you feel confident and make you feel like your old self or whatever you wanna call it. Like, that's okay. And I think there's so much online that it's like anti-bounce back, but.

• 20:31Gary Brecka?

  Anti-bounce back.

• 20:33Speaker 00

  Yes. And at the end of the day, I'm a believer of every woman should just do what makes them feel good at the end of the day. Whether that's during pregnancy, type of birth, breastfeeding, no breastfeeding, using formula, not using formula. Bounce, bouncing back to or giving themselves more grace, taking it easy. You should really tune into what feels right for you and do exactly that and quiet and everything else. Because why should we have an opinion on someone else? I have no clue. I find it the weirdest concept.

• 21:08Gary Brecka?

  Yeah. And I think there's plenty of people with opinions on it. But if you were looking back now, um, at the pregnancy journey for, so did you guys plan it? And so, timing wise, you guys were, let's do this.

• 21:22Speaker 00

  Well, we never really like had a sit down meeting. We're like, let's go.

• 21:27Gary Brecka?

  Hold this second.

• 21:27Speaker 00

  Yeah, exactly. I'll see you on the ninth.

• 21:30Gary Brecka?

  Well, you gotta time the ovulation cycle, right? So it gets a little weird.

• 21:34Speaker 00

  Yeah, exactly. And I so understand why, um, why and how and all the things that people need to do to get pregnant is, it's not always easy, but we were very lucky and it was straight after we got married. And we never had a conversation to be like, let's go, but it just, it happened literally one month after we got married.

• 21:54Gary Brecka?

  Oh, wow.

• 21:55Speaker 00

  So, yeah, I mean, we were so lucky, but I have to say, I was. I listened to, I think it was you and Sage.

• 22:02Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 22:03Speaker 00

  Who I love. She's so sweet.

• 22:04Gary Brecka?

  Oh, I love her too.

• 22:05Speaker 00

  You and Sage on the Skinny Confidential.

• 22:08Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 22:08Speaker 00

  And I think you're talking about methylfolate and all those things. I think I spoke about this on the last episode. Um, so I was doing a few things that maybe helped. I also was in the best shape of my life because I had just done this huge challenge. You know, I was getting ready for my wedding. I was in this like athlete mode, which

• 22:27Gary Brecka?

  Right.

• 22:27Speaker 00

  I also think is really beneficial for pregnancy. For, for pregnancy, during pregnancy, after pregnancy, I think

• 22:34Gary Brecka?

  So too.

• 22:34Speaker 00

  The mindset and this like, that, I, the only way I kind of have it in my mind is this like athlete mindset.

• 22:41Gary Brecka?

  Yeah, like a fit pregnancy.

• 22:42Speaker 00

  Exactly. Um, so yeah, we were, we were very lucky. We didn't plan it, but it happened very quickly.

• 22:49Gary Brecka?

  Is there anything, if you were looking back on that timeframe now, that you would do differently or that really surprised you?

• 22:57Speaker 00

  Hmm, on the pregnancy as a whole.

• 22:59Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 22:59Speaker 00

  The thing that surprised me the most was the hormones, for sure. Yeah, just the, just the real ups and downs and the kind of like, you, you do have like lonely moments and that surprised me. Um, and the sickness.

• 23:17Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 23:17Speaker 00

  But one thing I would say that really got me through and I really, it's annoying for someone that is in the fitness space to say this, but it's so true. Like, I compare my pregnancy to other people I know that haven't done exercise throughout their pregnancy and it's just unbelievable, the difference. And also unbelievable, the difference in the labor.

• 23:38Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 23:39Speaker 00

  And then the recovery. So I think it, it was kind of a real moment for me to be like, this is so cool. What we do, like what we do on the app, what I believe in really, really is so cool.

• 23:52Gary Brecka?

  Well, I think, you know, what's interesting is, you know, we don't think about conditioning for pregnancy, but I mean, this is

• 23:57Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 23:57Gary Brecka?

  arguably these single hardest event, physical event.

• 24:02Speaker 00

  Hundred percent.

• 24:02Gary Brecka?

  That a woman will ever go through.

• 24:04Speaker 00

  You're training for a marathon.

• 24:05Gary Brecka?

  Intentionally go through. Yeah. And it's, and, and I bet if we were to look at. Be interesting to do it like caloric burn and heart rate and you know, just

• 24:13Speaker 00

  Oh my gosh.

• 24:13Gary Brecka?

  All of you know, the stress levels and the strain. I mean, your whoop must have been about to explode. And in thinking that, you know, I would do nothing to prepare for that moment seems a little oxymoronic. And like you wouldn't prepare for half marathon or marathon, you would condition yourself for that event. Makes a lot of, a lot of sense to me.

• 24:34Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 24:35Gary Brecka?

  And

• 24:35Speaker 00

  I also, I also just think on that, we prepare during pregnancy for the baby.

• 24:40Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 24:40Speaker 00

  So we prepare their room, their nursery, their, you know, we buy every single thing that everyone tells us we need to buy. And we don't do anything for us. And I think that's really, really important. And because you, you are so depleted after birth. So the more you do for yourself during pregnancy, the better you are afterwards, you're the more prepared you are post birth, which is when you need it.

• 25:05Gary Brecka?

  What would you say post birth was the biggest change for you as, as a woman? I mean, physically, you obviously know what, what you go through. But what was the biggest change? Because I hear a lot of women talk about a priority shift that they didn't anticipate, right? If they've never had a child. And I've heard women talk about it's the, this kind of love that came out of me that was for the first time I cared about something more than myself.

• 25:33Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 25:34Gary Brecka?

  And I'm not asking you to say that if that's not what happened, but there seems to be this incredible new cascade of emotions, hormones, an identity and that happens after birth. It just had never happened in your, in, in your career, in your adult female career. Did you experience something like that?

• 25:57Speaker 00

  Yes. I have experienced the biggest change in my identity and my priorities and what I have time for. The the biggest shift ever, I feel like a completely different person.

• 26:11Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 26:12Speaker 00

  It's wild.

• 26:13Gary Brecka?

  In what ways?

• 26:14Speaker 00

  And in honestly, every way I could have ever imagined, like I was at at one of our community dinners last night explaining this to someone. And the only way I can articulate one of the kind of feelings I've gone through is I feel everything much deeper.

• 26:33Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 26:33Speaker 00

  So I feel like it's not that I'm kind of, I don't know whether you'd call it, I've now become like a very sensitive person or something, but I just, I feel everything, whether it's positive, sad, empathy for someone else, I have like unlocked these feelings I never knew I had. So that's really crazy. And I feel my priorities have completely shifted, which is of course obvious because you care for that little person more than anything in the world.

• 27:06Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 27:06Speaker 00

  That is your purpose now.

• 27:08Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 27:09Speaker 00

  Um, but I also feel it gives you this like ninja like focus.

• 27:16Gary Brecka?

  You do kind of feel like, well, hell, yeah, I got that, nailed it.

• 27:19Speaker 00

  It's it's really weird because I feel in so many ways, I feel like this, as so many women will relate, you're dissociated, you feel um kind of very sensitive, very um all over the place in your mind. Like sometimes you can, I can go into a room and people are talking and I'm not really hearing them, I feel that. But so you go through all of those natural feelings and being very hard on yourself and all of that. But then on the other side, you feel like superhuman.

• 27:54Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 27:54Speaker 00

  It's weird.

• 27:55Gary Brecka?

  You know, it's interesting, I read a study a while ago called the Spain Scale of Emotion, Scale of Positive and Negative Emotion, and talked about frequency, right? Frequency that leaves our body, the frequency of authenticity, frequency of love. And we often talk about, you know, the universal law of attraction, right?

• 28:12Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 28:12Gary Brecka?

  You know, depending on the kind of frequency you put out is what you would attract in the universe. And there's a prevailing. Theory that women are more intuitive, their intuition is heightened, not because they're more intuitive, but because they're more sensitive to frequency. And, and after pregnancy, they have this heightened sense of sensitivity to frequency.

• 28:39Speaker 00

  That's so interesting.

• 28:41Gary Brecka?

  We call it intuition.

• 28:43Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 28:43Gary Brecka?

  But it's not intuition, it's actually a sensitivity to frequency.

• 28:46Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 28:47Gary Brecka?

  You know, like in my case, you know, my wife Sage, she's a very good judge of character, just to categorize it. And, you know, we'll meet somebody, I like this guy.

• 28:57Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah.

• 28:58Gary Brecka?

  She's like, I just don't like this dude. I'm like, well, why? We look at his shoes, came in a Ferrari, he's got a great suit, like, you know, a nice watch. I mean, what's wrong with him? And she's like, I don't think you should have business with him. And I'm like, well, why? Like, what is it? Is I too, eyes too close together? Like, like, give me some data. And, and she's like, I can't put a finger on it, but something's up. And then six months later, I'm pulling the knife out of my back, right? You know? And, and I think, you know, maybe as a part of this miracle of birth, because what I observed in my former spouse, when in all three of our kids, was once we brought the baby home, I was petrified.

• 29:38Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 29:39Gary Brecka?

  I was like, I don't know what to do with this thing. I thought it was always felt like I was gonna break it.

• 29:42Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 29:43Gary Brecka?

  Right? So it was like so gentle, like I would put her up and her head would fall and I'm like, oh my God, her neck broke, you know? And, but there's so much more resilient than you think.

• 29:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 29:52Gary Brecka?

  I mean, they're really tough. And, and so I was, I always approached my firstborn. And by the time we got to three, I was like, just lay him on the floor.

• 30:03Speaker 00

  Been there, done that.

• 30:04Gary Brecka?

  Yeah, yeah. He doesn't need a playpen, you know?

• 30:07Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 30:07Gary Brecka?

  There's so many hand me downs. Sorry, Dylan.

• 30:09Speaker 00

  I'm not sure.

• 30:10Gary Brecka?

  Yeah, yeah. You know, like, when you, when you get on your first commercial flight with your first baby, it's like the Ring and Brothers circus, right? You got the playpen, you got the diaper bag, you got extra farming. Like, you always, you always spot the first parent, you know?

• 30:24Speaker 00

  You're just like, here's the seatbelt to play with.

• 30:26Gary Brecka?

  Yeah. It's like, if you can put him in the seatbelt, stick you in the back seat pocket. And, and it is funny, because you actually learn that they're a lot more resilient. But what fascinated me, and it sort of correlated to what I had been reading, was When my daughter would cry, it all sounded the same to me.

• 30:47Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 30:47Gary Brecka?

  And like, she's just in there wailing. And, um, and she's like, no, she's hungry.

• 30:51Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 30:51Gary Brecka?

  Or she's gassy.

• 30:52Speaker 00

  The crying.

• 30:52Gary Brecka?

  Or she wants to be picked up. And I'm like, how do you know?

• 30:55Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 30:56Gary Brecka?

  But there was like this, this person that emerged that I'd never knew, but somehow was confident and understood what to do. And I was like, have you been reading books? Like, is there a manual somewhere I didn't get a copy of? Like, how do you just know? And I think it's a part of that miracle of birth, at least from having observed it. Like, a woman just, this entire woman emerges from them that they've never met before. Your husband's never met before. And it just sort of takes over and has this confident sense of, I know what to do.

• 31:30Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:30Gary Brecka?

  Did you sort of experience that?

• 31:32Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:32Gary Brecka?

  That was wild for me.

• 31:34Speaker 00

  It's crazy because you kind of step into your, no matter like what your power dynamic in your relationship, when you bring that baby home, you are that, as I said, that lioness.

• 31:45Gary Brecka?

  Large and in charge.

• 31:45Speaker 00

  Yeah, exactly.

• 31:46Gary Brecka?

  Doubt, no doubt.

• 31:48Speaker 00

  And, and the, the dad kind of like follows in your footsteps.

• 31:53Gary Brecka?

  But just so you know, we're panic stricken.

• 31:55Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah.

• 31:55Gary Brecka?

  Okay, just, we don't know what to do.

• 31:57Speaker 00

  And it's so hard on the dads too, you know? Like, we all talk about women, but it's, it's hard for everyone and, and the ups and the downs and everything. But yeah, I completely experienced that. And especially with, um, with breastfeeding, I felt, I felt there was a lot going on with that that was surprising to me.

• 32:16Speaker 00

  But yeah, I, I saw actually one, one of these videos online where they recorded the mom and the baby, like, the bedroom. And the baby would start crying, but what you saw on the video was the mom got out of bed like seconds before, woke up seconds before the cry.

• 32:33Gary Brecka?

  Wow.

• 32:34Speaker 00

  So it's so crazy how in tune. But if you think about it, like, you are literally.

• 32:41Speaker 00

  On a cellular level bonded to that baby for nine months. And it's just, it's unbelievable when you think of it like that. You're so in tune with them when they come out. It's, it's crazy. So I think that is kind of unfortunately the edge we have over that.

• 32:58Gary Brecka?

  So wild. I mean, again, this really correlates to what I was reading because they, you know, what we call intuition is really this frequency and, and for you to be that tied into the, the baby. And as their frequency is changing, the mother senses it. And I mean, there's lots of documentation of this, right? And, and it's one of those miracles. Like, I feel like we're only beginning to understand it. As smart as we think we are, mother nature has really outsmarted us. You know, even, even when I used to feed, uh, you know, and I always refer to the first child because I kind of had it down by the time third one came around.

• 33:33Gary Brecka?

  You know, I would pick up my daughter and she's like, she wants a bottle. And I would be like, well, shoving it in her face and she turned her in her head. And I'm like, she doesn't want the bottle. And then, and then she would grab her and lay her a certain way and go right in.

• 33:46Speaker 00

  And she's like guzzling the milk.

• 33:49Gary Brecka?

  What is wrong? You have a different arm than I do. But you know, that must just be such an amazing time to like, meet this person that was always been inside you, but just for whatever reason, wasn't presented to the world. Until, until this miracle of birth. But

• 34:06Speaker 00

  It is amazing. It's incredible.

• 34:08Gary Brecka?

  And, and I know you hate this phrase, but um, can we talk a little bit about the bounce back phase?

• 34:12Speaker 00

  We can, no, I don't even hate it. I hate that it's problematic.

• 34:17Gary Brecka?

  A thing, yeah.

• 34:18Speaker 00

  Like, who cares? Bounce back if you want to bounce back. Don't bounce back, be calm, be, take your time, do whatever you want to do. But yeah, for me, to be completely honest, this is my job. This is what I love to do. So I do want to feel strong. I do want to also look strong and I have physical goals as well. And I want to be strong in my mind for my baby. So yeah, there was definitely a, um, a kind of fitness protocol when I, when I came back. I actually started working out two weeks after. Having L, which is typically, it's normally six weeks. You get your doctor's check. You then start exercising. And I think that is good advice for someone that isn't very like

• 35:01Speaker 00

  confident in the gym or in workouts. But otherwise, I think, you know, a lot of people know their own bodies.

• 35:09Gary Brecka?

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• 35:50Gary Brecka?

  Visit drinkh2tab.com. That's drinkh2tab.com and upgrade your hydration today. Now let's get back to the Ultimate Human Podcast. Probably has a lot to do with the preparation beforehand, right? Because there was, if you look at the break that you took between, you know, exercising through pregnancy and then having the birth and then starting to exercise again, probably has a lot to do with how early you can start that process.

• 36:16Speaker 00

  Oh, for sure. I was, I was working out the day before.

• 36:21Gary Brecka?

  Delivery?

• 36:22Speaker 00

  Yeah, the day before delivery.

• 36:24Gary Brecka?

  What were you doing? I gotta know.

• 36:25Speaker 00

  I was doing Pilates and lifting weights.

• 36:28Gary Brecka?

  Were you? That's so.

• 36:30Speaker 00

  And I was lifting heavy weights and I was doing a long class. I felt, felt empowered, like it was, I felt so heavy by that point and so sleep deprived. But the one time I felt like me was when I was on the mat doing my workout. I felt empowered. I felt good. I was like in the zone. You know, the athlete mindset. I felt like, okay, I was almost training in that workout for the delivery, which of course they're, they're two very different things, but that was my mindset. So I think, as you say, having then. Two weeks off for the recovery and also sleep and just feeling like you had a tiny bit of energy at some point in the day. And then I was just gradually building up and building up.

• 37:12Speaker 00

  And now I'm pretty much back to my normal workouts.

• 37:16Gary Brecka?

  And how exactly far out?

• 37:17Speaker 00

  Eight weeks.

• 37:18Gary Brecka?

  Oh, my gosh. I mean, you look amazing.

• 37:20Speaker 00

  Thank you so much.

• 37:21Gary Brecka?

  And how are you feeling sleeping?

• 37:24Speaker 00

  I will be honest, like, I feel good in clothes.

• 37:28Speaker 00

  Clothes, clothes are working wonders for me right now. But yeah, I'll be completely honest. I had a photo shoot yesterday with our community. And at the beginning of the photo shoot, I just did like a few pictures that we had to get for some press images. And I felt really not great. And, you know, I'm coming from someone that did get back to feeling, you know, good in clothes quite soon after giving birth and things. But, you know, the second you have like a camera, bad camera angle or whatever, you're like, oh, God, you know, and that's just, that's just how it goes. And I think I'm working on giving myself more grace in that sense and being patient and it takes time and not everyone goes straight into a photo shoot after birth.

• 38:11Gary Brecka?

  Right.

• 38:12Speaker 00

  So that was pretty stupid to do something like that. And we need to just stop putting pressure on ourselves in that sense and just get back to doing the things that make you feel good. So yeah, I've been working out. I've been doing, I do four Pilates classes a week from the app and I do two weight training sessions. So I do one upper and one lower kind of focus.

• 38:35Gary Brecka?

  Yeah, my, my wife is a part of your community. She loves it.

• 38:37Speaker 00

  Oh, I'm so pleased.

• 38:38Gary Brecka?

  Sage is a part of her community. What really got her into your community had nothing to do with birth, or even Pilates. It was actually about your journey with your back injury. Because it really resonated with her. She had a, an L five S one fusion from a really bad car accident. And it changed everything about her life because she was born in Steamboat Spring. So she grew up skiing and she's an expert, expert skier. Her nickname is Safety Sage. And like, she hasn't had a parking ticket since 1994 or something. We call her Safety Sage. Like, if there's a crosswalk, she goes all the way to the crosswalk, makes a 90 degree angle, waits for the light to change. I'm already over there and half a block down the

• 39:19Gary Brecka?

  street, you know, like I've cut the, cut the street. But when she gets on a pair of skis, it's like. Lindsey Vonn, I mean, it's the craziest thing I've ever, I've ever seen, like just a little ponytail sticking out of a helmet and down the mountain she goes.

• 39:35Speaker 00

  I love that.

• 39:35Gary Brecka?

  And so this back injury was a really tough thing for her because, you know, it's very similar to your experience with your, you know, your, your back injury. And it just really resonated with her. And I will say, not just to plug your community, but she's, she's gotten a lot out of it.

• 39:54Speaker 00

  Oh, I'm so pleased. Yeah. And she sent that message. I, I was so passionate about her trying it because I know, I know it will help.

• 40:01Gary Brecka?

  Yeah. And, and you know, muscle is our metabolic currency. And I think, you know, when women think about weight training, strength training, resistance training, I think there's a, a stigma, if you will, that, you know, women don't want to get too big. They don't want to get too bulky. I think Dr. Gabrielle Lyon has done a great job of messaging about the importance of muscle. And, and, you know, there are, there are a lot of, you know, great thought leaders in, in the space that you're very unlikely to get bulky by doing resistance training. But it probably had a significant impact on your ability to not only get through the birthing process, but this bounce back coming, for two weeks for you to be out, be back to your full exercise routine.

• 40:46Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:47Gary Brecka?

  Is pretty soon. You know, I would say barring a C-section, probably very few women.

• 40:51Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:52Gary Brecka?

  Are able to do that.

• 40:53Speaker 00

  Well, I mean, two weeks I was modifying, so I was building my core back up because it takes a lot. Like you're not able to fully do everything on your core or you, you still can train your core during pregnancy, but not everything. So I was building up and now I'm fully back to, to my full workouts, which is amazing. I'm back to doing my live classes and that feels really good. But it's, it's a funny time, I think. I think for. Also for women now, there is such a rise in the likes of Ozempic and and things. So I I do think postpartum mums have a harder time nowadays.

• 41:31Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 41:32Speaker 00

  Because there is that there's this kind of new world of Ozempic feeling like is everywhere. Yeah, and I think the comparison of, you know, different body types now, the norm and has changed. And I think that creates a lot of added pressure for women. So, um, yeah.

• 41:54Gary Brecka?

  So what is, um, has anything changed about your diet, your supplement routine? Um, you know, obviously, exercise has got to be built around your, your, your, your child's schedule.

• 42:07Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 42:07Gary Brecka?

  Do you mind me asking if you're breastfeeding?

• 42:09Speaker 00

  So I stopped breastfeeding after five weeks.

• 42:12Gary Brecka?

  Five weeks, okay.

• 42:13Speaker 00

  Um, mostly because just I I needed to go back to work and and it it's it's a full time job breastfeeding.

• 42:20Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 42:21Speaker 00

  It really is. I mean, you, what I didn't realize is that it, I mean, during the day alone is like five times. And each time is like forty five minutes to an hour that you need to allow. So, I mean, how can you get anything done?

• 42:35Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 42:35Speaker 00

  I've I got so much respect for people that are able to do it and and want to do it. I think whatever journey is great, but for me, I had to stop. I also noticed I really, um, felt low with my hormones. Yeah, and I spoke to my doctor and and again, like, it's it's so weird and irrational. But I texted her and said, I'm so embarrassed, you know, I'm having these like low moments and stuff. She said, well, we can try an estrogen patch or we can, you can stop breastfeeding and see how. And honestly, like, almost to the day, it shifted.

• 43:08Gary Brecka?

  Wow, you know, I I I see this in menopausal women too. You know, I've been trying to do a lot more content around, you know, female specific topics. So there's a positive information and, you know, since my wife just went through menopause, it was a big topic for us. And what I will say is, um, we didn't, we didn't.

• 43:28Gary Brecka?

  Notice or flag the signs of uh uh menopause early enough because it it sort of crept in on on her. You know, started with some brain fog and she was like, I'm just busy. We got a lot going on. We're traveling a lot. But it it it, you know, as soon as you see the hot flash, okay, that's like the the big warning sign. And I think everybody goes, okay, hot flash, menopause. But what started years earlier was just the brain fog. The fatigue, especially in the morning, like she just couldn't get out of bed. And much to what you were saying, um, we did this test called the Dutch test, hormone test, a 24 hour urine test. And everything came glaringly apparent. She had no cortisols. Her melatonin was through the roof in the morning.

• 44:14Gary Brecka?

  So she was trying to wake up almost by taking a sleeping pill, right? Because the melatonin was so high, the cortisol was so low. It explained a lot of mood and emotional things. It explained the lack of libido. We've been very vulnerable and and you know, open about it, uh, because I think it it it will help a lot of women.

• 44:32Speaker 00

  For sure.

• 44:32Gary Brecka?

  But I'm I'm happy to hear that your OB GYN offered estrogen because, you know, if if there was just one lever to sort of torture a woman, it would be estrogen, right? Like, everything that a woman does not want um happens by changing estrogen. And it's it's either dominance or lack thereof in the body, you know, skin elasticity, water retention, uh, brain fog, you know, libido, energy, focus, concentration, short term recall, like just by shutting that one switch off. It's like the hub of a wheel with all these spokes. It seems like whole world went to hell in a handbasket at once.

• 45:14Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 45:14Gary Brecka?

  And I think so many OB GYNs are afraid to suggest hormone therapy, especially at your age.

• 45:21Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 45:21Gary Brecka?

  So that's really, um, I think, progressive for him or her to have done that. That's great.

• 45:27Speaker 00

  And I'm so happy that we're talking about it because you just you just get so embarrassed. Like, I really was like shocked by, I thought, you know, you convince yourself that you're invincible.

• 45:38Gary Brecka?

  With this beautiful baby, right?

• 45:39Speaker 00

  Yeah. And and I cannot describe to you the crashes. Like, I would be Like so, so happy, having the best day, everything was amazing, just like elated. And then all of a sudden, whoa, I feel the worst I've ever felt.

• 45:56Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 45:57Speaker 00

  I feel low, sad, dissociated, all these things, like one, literally one minute to the next.

• 46:03Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 46:04Speaker 00

  And, and again, like that is, it's really sad that people, and probably a lot of people don't diagnose or, or delay the diagnosis because they do have that shame attached, which is

• 46:14Gary Brecka?

  Right.

• 46:15Speaker 00

  really sad. And they probably feel like, you know, whether it's, whether it's postpartum, they're, they're worried that something's gonna happen, or, you know, with menopause, and maybe they, they're embarrassed or something. And it's such a shame to feel like that, when actually the diagnosis is the thing that will change.

• 46:30Gary Brecka?

  Yeah, you know, I, I really applauded our federal government of the Food and Drug Administration because they recently removed the black box warnings from female hormone therapy. There was a numerous study done called the Women's Health, Health Initiative, and it looked at female hormone therapy over a prolonged period of time, uh, tens of thousands of women, but it was really misreported. And the diagnostic underpinnings of this study were, um, they weren't manipulated in the study, but the information was manipulated. It did not show, uh, hormone therapy as having an increase in breast cancer, but that's what people thought for decades. And so, women just completely avoided, um, hormones.

• 47:10Gary Brecka?

  And, you know, getting testing for women and looking at your levels and ratios of hormones can completely change your life. So for you, stopping breastfeeding brought those back into a normal.

• 47:23Speaker 00

  Exactly. Yeah. And sorry, I completely went off on a tangent. You asked me about nutrition and supplements. But yeah, I think, I think really being so incredibly mindful of your nutrition is so important. And I don't mean cutting calories. I mean fueling and nourishing your body. Um, you know, getting healthy fats in, lots of protein, lots of fiber, drinking a lot of water, that's especially if you're breastfeeding.

• 47:48Gary Brecka?

  Oh, yeah.

• 47:49Speaker 00

  You're so dehydrated and, you know, having, having more calories if you are breastfeeding. Um, so I think it's really important. I think that is the time where you should be focusing on your, your, your nutrition. More than ever.

• 48:03Gary Brecka?

  And you're not vegan or vegetarian, right?

• 48:05Speaker 00

  No.

• 48:05Gary Brecka?

  Okay, so I mean, could you give us like a typical?

• 48:09Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 48:09Gary Brecka?

  Days worth of meals?

• 48:10Speaker 00

  Yeah, sure.

• 48:11Gary Brecka?

  What does that look like?

• 48:11Speaker 00

  So um, in the morning, I'll have something like um, eggs or a protein shake if I'm in a rush. Um, you got me back on eggs, actually.

• 48:22Gary Brecka?

  I think it's nature's perfect protein.

• 48:25Speaker 00

  And berries. So I try and eat, you know, I guess protein powder is the the one like process thing I would I would be going for. And then um, I will have for lunch, I'll do like leftovers, which maybe is salmon, um, vegetables, rice. Um, and then in the evening, maybe it's a steak, uh, more vegetables, sweet potato, quinoa, something like that. And I'll have like for snacks, Greek yogurt, dark chocolate, um, nut butter.

• 49:00Gary Brecka?

  Has heavy, has it, has your palate just completely changed? Has it stayed the same? Or did you have any like those weird pregnancy cravings? You always hear of like pickles and ice cream or something crazy.

• 49:10Speaker 00

  I had just.

• 49:11Gary Brecka?

  Did you go off the rails?

• 49:12Speaker 00

  I went, oh, I had like extreme aversions. I had crazy sickness for the first three months. So certain like garlic, the smell of like, uh, we were in Spain and like basically everything has garlic in it. And normally I would love all the food in Spain and I was just like, get me away from I had like, it was my birthday.

• 49:31Gary Brecka?

  Like that hypersensitivity.

• 49:32Speaker 00

  Yeah, I dry ate cereal for my birthday in the in the room.

• 49:35Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 49:36Speaker 00

  But yeah, so there were, there was a lot of aversions. I didn't have so much like craving, um, more like crispy cold fruit, things like that. Um, but yeah, now it was weird because I thought has, because I started eating eggs during pregnancy. And I started noticing that I was less sensitive to dairy. Um, and that seems to have.

• 49:58Gary Brecka?

  Less sensitive to dairy, wow.

• 49:59Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 50:00Gary Brecka?

  That's great.

• 50:01Speaker 00

  Yeah, so I was having more dairy than ever.

• 50:03Gary Brecka?

  Like yogurts and.

• 50:04Speaker 00

  Exactly. Not, I don't drink milk and dairy milk. But yeah, yogurts and things like that. And I wouldn't be so worried about like a sauce or something.

• 50:13Gary Brecka?

  Right.

• 50:14Speaker 00

  But yeah, I've pretty much stayed the same. And then supplements wise, I'm taking, let me think with my brain fog, all the things.

• 50:22Gary Brecka?

  With my brain fog? I'll fix that for you after the podcast.

• 50:25Speaker 00

  Please. I'm so excited to do that test. So methylfolate.

• 50:31Gary Brecka?

  Methylfolate, monster, huge.

• 50:34Speaker 00

  Really good. I take Perfect Aminos in the morning.

• 50:39Gary Brecka?

  It's excellent. All nine essential amino acids.

• 50:41Speaker 00

  Yeah, I have the one that has the electrolytes in it as well. Yeah.

• 50:44Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 50:45Speaker 00

  Creatine, I actually put those together.

• 50:49Speaker 00

  Creatine is a big one, I think.

• 50:50Gary Brecka?

  Creatine is huge. I actually just launched a creatine here in the UK and all throughout Europe. It's a, it's the HCL version so that there's much less bloating. It's more water soluble.

• 51:02Speaker 00

  Amazing.

• 51:03Gary Brecka?

  And then the monohydrate, some women do fine on monohydrate, but if you don't, and my wife bloats like a puffer fish on.

• 51:11Speaker 00

  Oh, that's interesting.

• 51:12Gary Brecka?

  But the creatine hydrochloride, the HCL, she does excellent with. What was it, what is astounding about where the pattern of research is really starting to support creatine, especially for women, is in the cognitive side, crossing the bun brain barrier. Hey guys, let me tell you about one of my favorite new hydration drinks. Now, this is for distance athletes, HIIT cardio exercisers, people that sweat a lot or exercise intensely. And A Game is a hydration drink. It has eight essential vitamins. It has all of the electrolytes, the entire suite of B vitamins. Before you freak out and read that it has 21 grams of sugar, which it does, the sugar is coming from natural cane sugar and honey, my preferred mechanisms for getting glucose into the blood during intense exercise. It also has natural flavors,

• 51:57Gary Brecka?

  but these natural flavors don't come from bacterial fermentation. They actually come from real citrus fruits and the color is from vegetable juice, not artificial dyes. So next time you're looking for a great hydration drink and you're exercising intensely, A Game is your choice. Now let's get back to the Ultimate Human Podcast.

• 52:15Speaker 00

  Speaking of brain fog, that's what I really notice. I feel much sharper taking

• 52:20Gary Brecka?

  Yes.

• 52:21Speaker 00

  Um, which is, is crazy because some people think it's, you know,

• 52:24Gary Brecka?

  It can mitigate sleep deprivation.

• 52:26Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 52:26Gary Brecka?

  So.

• 52:27Speaker 00

  I've, I feel really good back. I didn't take creatine when I was pregnant, even though I'm sure you probably could, but I just didn't. Um, so yeah, I feel good back on that. And then what else? Zinc, um, iron, um, that's mostly for the hair shedding.

• 52:43Gary Brecka?

  Mm hmm.

• 52:44Speaker 00

  Um.

• 52:45Gary Brecka?

  I'm glad you brought that up too, because that is a

• 52:47Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 52:47Gary Brecka?

  Strong correlation to

• 52:49Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 52:49Gary Brecka?

  Female alopecia postpartum.

• 52:51Speaker 00

  It's, it's crazy because you have this like luscious, thick hair during pregnancy. And you're like, great, that was the one, you know, like, great thing that I loved.

• 53:00Gary Brecka?

  God, and you know.

• 53:00Speaker 00

  And then it, then it just takes it away from you. Yeah. Um, and then what else am I taking? Magnesium probiotic? Did I say that one? And I think that's everything.

• 53:12Gary Brecka?

  Yeah, that's it. You know, I think to the, you know, the mindset towards a lot of this, like you said, I think a lot of women put so much pressure on themselves to perform and they don't give themselves that grace. They don't actually raise their hand when, uh, they, they have these bouts of, of sadness, you know, uh, very often postpartum goes undiagnosed by the female. It's usually the spouse that comes in and finally says, we've got to get you some, some help because you are not yourself.

• 53:42Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 53:43Gary Brecka?

  Um, could you talk a little bit about the, the male's role? Um, I don't want you to throw your husband under the bus. But, but like, what would you, what advice would you give to, you know, young couples, young husbands? That are going to go through this with their spouse for the first time? Cause I've got three kids heading this direction.

• 54:05Speaker 00

  Oh, so exciting.

• 54:06Gary Brecka?

  And, uh, you know, I, I had a phenomenal OB GYN on my podcast the other day and he talked, it was male. And he talked about the, um, importance of, uh,

• 54:18Gary Brecka?

  Pregnancy, getting pregnant, having the baby, and then immediately after caring for the baby, he called it the thousand day pregnancy.

• 54:26Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 54:27Gary Brecka?

  And he called it a thousand days because he talked about the preparation phase. You know, men sort of think like their role is over after the wife is pregnant. But the truth is, you know, they're contributing 50% of the genetic material. Sperm health is just as important as egg health.

• 54:42Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 54:43Gary Brecka?

  But we focus mainly on egg health. And, you know, sperm counts are declining at 1% a year right now. Infertility is rising at 2% a year. This is a very dangerous divergence.

• 54:55Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 54:57Gary Brecka?

  And, you know, the male has a, has a very significant role in this pregnancy process, even though they're not carrying.

• 55:04Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 55:05Gary Brecka?

  So how did hubby do?

• 55:08Speaker 00

  Well, he's amazing. I got no complaints. So he's, and you know what? He's really, you know, everyone says that you, you love them more when they become a dad. And that is definitely true. I mean, I loved him a lot already and now it's, it's definitely a different type of love.

• 55:24Gary Brecka?

  Yeah, see a different side of him, right?

• 55:25Speaker 00

  Yeah, exactly. But what I think is really amazing is that I'll, I, cause he's very, you know, he's much older than me. He's very kind of, he's not used to this new world of mental health anxiety, you know, that we're now discussing. So it's not so normal to him to have these open discussions. He didn't, he wasn't raised in that way. So.

• 55:50Gary Brecka?

  Is he Dutch?

• 55:51Speaker 00

  He's Danish.

• 55:51Gary Brecka?

  Danish, I mean, yeah.

• 55:52Speaker 00

  Yeah, so I, you know, I was talking to him and again, it's like not something he's used to. So I was like, I'm feeling like this and you know, I'm feeling all these lows and I just constantly crying, like constantly, daily. And he was kind of like taking it in and I thought, you know, Is, does he get it? He doesn't get this. And then it wasn't until when we were sat with his mum. And there was something that was like, a comment was made or whatever. And he, and she wasn't even remotely attacking me, just to clarify. But he felt that he needed to like, stand up for me somehow.

• 56:34Speaker 00

  And he just repeated everything I had been saying that, you know, like as women, you're like, are they listening?

• 56:39Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 56:40Speaker 00

  Did he actually take any of that in? But, and then, and then he repeated all these things. Well, you know, and the estrogen and this happens and you know what? Women have to go through so much and he just completely like came to my defense. And I was like, it's so interesting because whilst I've become this like lioness towards the baby. He's become this like protector of me. And the baby. So it's, it's, it's interesting. Like the guys don't get enough credit because they are going through a lot as well. And you also, like the dynamic changes. I mean, firstly, you're, you're literally not able to have sex medically for the first six weeks, you know?

• 57:20Gary Brecka?

  Right.

• 57:20Speaker 00

  So that is quite a change for some people.

• 57:23Gary Brecka?

  Sure.

• 57:24Speaker 00

  So there are so many things that go on that are, you know, a shift in the dynamic and the sleep and everything. So, and you're both going through that.

• 57:32Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 57:32Speaker 00

  Um, so I would say for men, just, I think the, the biggest thing that they can do is to really understand the realness of hormones.

• 57:43Gary Brecka?

  Yes.

• 57:44Speaker 00

  And the support that the mum needs emotionally, I would say.

• 57:49Gary Brecka?

  Yeah.

• 57:49Speaker 00

  Um, and he's really, you know, he's been amazing and really surprised me in that sense. Not to like discredit him before, but not to say he was so insensitive.

• 58:00Gary Brecka?

  Amazing to hear how like every aspect of life changes, you know? You change who you are, but by choice.

• 58:06Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 58:07Gary Brecka?

  By, by, by design and by choice. It's not like, ah, I've got this baby and I, you know, gotta, gotta put the baby first. No, like your priority shifts.

• 58:15Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 58:16Gary Brecka?

  And it's what you choose to do and it happens biophysiological. Which again, it brings me back to this miracle birth. It's like, this can't happen by accident, you know? You know, you're talking about videos of the mother waking up before the child wakes up and is on her way in and the child wakes up. It doesn't surprise me at all. It's just so fascinating to me. And, you know, I know a lot of, you know, young women, there was for years, this, this push for women to be like men and like be entrepreneurs, seize the day, sleep is for losers. You sleep when you die. Take the hill. You're just as qualified. And I don't deny or argue

• 58:54Gary Brecka?

  any of those points. But when it comes to pregnancy, it really is on their shoulders. And to watch this like miracle emerge from them, to me was really just fascinating.

• 59:10Speaker 00

  It's a time where you can't go into that kind of like, oh, yeah, like sleep is for losers and like hustle culture. You cannot do, you can't do that. You really can't. And it's a fact of life. And the more support that you can get, the better.

• 59:25Gary Brecka?

  But to hear that it changes, you know, hormonally and physiologically. So you're like, actually, I want nothing to do with that. This is my priority now.

• 59:33Speaker 00

  Exactly.

• 59:33Gary Brecka?

  It's like God gives you that gift of this shift in priorities. So you don't have to fight those tendencies. Do you know what I mean?

• 59:39Speaker 00

  But what is interesting, like for us, we're like a slightly, I guess, have like a different situation from the norm. Like I'm working much more than he is working, for example. So he's more available than I am to, as in, he's more flexible.

• 59:55Gary Brecka?

  That's cool.

• 59:56Speaker 00

  Which is really cool. So, but, but again, it's, it's so weird to me that there's this narrative of like, I've heard some dads being like, oh, I'm babysitting tonight. It's like, pretty sure you're just parenting.

• 1:00:08Gary Brecka?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:00:11Speaker 00

  Pretty sure that's just cool being a parent.

• 1:00:14Gary Brecka?

  Yeah, I'm on duty.

• 1:00:15Speaker 00

  You know, when it's like, oh, I'm on dad duty. It's like, imagine a mom saying I'm babysitting or I'm on mom duty. Like, that doesn't happen. So I, like, we're really 50 50 in this parenting. And I, I, it's funny because I feel so lucky because I'm so aware that that's not the norm. But at the same time, you know, why should I be feeling like, it's a bit funny one, isn't it?

• 1:00:38Gary Brecka?

  Yeah, that really is. Now that you say it, that's, I probably said that a thousand times.

• 1:00:43Speaker 00

  Imagine, imagine like I said.

• 1:00:46Gary Brecka?

  Like, I'm home with the kids tonight.

• 1:00:49Gary Brecka?

  Pretty sure you're just parenting. Okay.

• 1:00:51Speaker 00

  Pretty sure you're just existing in your, in your life. How you chose it to be.

• 1:00:56Gary Brecka?

  Did you get hired?

• 1:00:57Speaker 00

  Yeah, exactly. You're getting paid by the hour.

• 1:00:59Gary Brecka?

  I think we sort of feel like we should get a cookie or something. Hey, I was here all night with the kids.

• 1:01:05Speaker 00

  Exactly. But yeah, well done. But it's so funny because he's so not like that. And like he'll talking about, you know, filling, filling yourself, filling your own cup. Postpartum, like in the mornings, he knows I need to work out. I need to meditate. I need to do my breath work. All those things. So he goes and takes L, does her morning feed, like will, you know, look after her as I do. And we're, we're a complete tag team, but he, he knows, okay, just as much as he needs his time, I need my time. So we tag team, but it was funny. I had one, um, I did a Q and A on Instagram. And I've actually been so lucky. I've not really had any kind of like negative comments or anything, but one, one person really made me laugh.

• 1:01:49Speaker 00

  She said, where is L during the day?

• 1:01:54Speaker 00

  Well, my office is at home. My baby's at home. Gasp is at home. Like I've openly said, we have a nanny, you know, as if I sent L off to like summer camp or something eight weeks old.

• 1:02:05Gary Brecka?

  I don't know. That's a great question. Yeah.

• 1:02:07Speaker 00

  But I think it is because we're not used to that, like kind of the, and I get it because typically, you know, historically, the men went out to work and, but you know, times are changing, guys. So, yeah.

• 1:02:19Gary Brecka?

  So overall, um, and, and then I want to get into the VIP questions because I have a VIP community like you do. And, um, when I told them you were coming back on, I mean, it was the most number of questions we ever had submitted. My team had to just narrow, narrow them down. So I went, I want to get to those, uh, questions, but, um, for all of the young soon to be moms.

• 1:02:42Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 1:02:43Gary Brecka?

  Out there. Um, and you know, they're, they're in a great relationship. They decided, okay, then I'm going to, I want to get pregnant.

• 1:02:50Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:02:51Gary Brecka?

  You know, the, the fire stoked.

• 1:02:55Gary Brecka?

  What if any advice, you know, would you give? And I would love some early stage, you know, parenting advice if you're comfortable doing that.

• 1:03:03Speaker 00

  Of course. So I would say just go with what you feel.

• 1:03:12Speaker 00

  Is best for you, your family situation, your partner during pregnancy. Try not to, I know it's really tempting to listen to all the advice, but just really know that you know best right now. And I think that kind of just relieves you in some way. And I also think um there are hard times during pregnancy, but there are also amazing times and bonding times. And I would say, especially if you're a first time mom and you're able to have that time, you know, alone and things without other kids running around. If you're a first time mom, really try to use it as a time to really go inwards.

• 1:03:54Speaker 00

  And have that like cozy time with yourself to reflect on who you are as a person and who you want to be going into motherhood and what you want to teach your your child. And just look forward to it. It is, it it's a roller coaster, it's a journey, but it is the most unbelievable thing you will do. And yeah, you're just, I'm so excited for you. It's amazing.

• 1:04:20Gary Brecka?

  You know, I I don't give parenting advice um other than to say it just gets better and better and better. You know, my kids, I can truly say this, are my best friends. They are truly my best friends as adults. They're twenty seven, twenty five, uh twenty one and seventeen.

• 1:04:40Gary Brecka?

  But they choose to spend time with me and I choose to spend time with them. We're like a traveling comedy show. We work in the same industry together. I'm I'm so empowered by them and inspired by them and for different reasons. But the one thing that I think we did very well through all three of our kids was we just, we didn't shut our life down. We brought our children into our life. We had the bugaboo stroller. We went to restaurants. Nightclubs, we went out to dinner. The kid actually falls asleep in a noisy restaurant. And if they were a little bit late getting to bed, I didn't make it so you had to come to the house and tiptoe around the house. Like, because I noticed what those kids were like when they were on

• 1:05:25Gary Brecka?

  commercial flights, like we all sat next to the babies, first time that they have actually heard noise when they're trying to take a nap.

• 1:05:30Speaker 00

  Yeah, that's so true.

• 1:05:31Gary Brecka?

  And if I was to give any advice, it would just be just bring your baby and your kids in into your life. Don't come to a full stop and create this sterile environment, hyper regimented environment. Because then the first time that that child is outside of that environment, you know, it's a disaster. It's like a meltdown.

• 1:05:52Speaker 00

  It's interesting because I, I'm, we've actually got Elle on a big routine. But within that, we're not, you know, we'll be, for example, like where Elle sleeps is right next to our kitchen. We'll have friends over, like we're not.

• 1:06:07Gary Brecka?

  That's what I mean, yeah.

• 1:06:08Speaker 00

  Things like that, I just don't think, I don't, I want my baby to be able to sleep anywhere, anytime. And, you know, I think things like that are so important, but the routine that we have her on, what I will say, and it's not advice, because I still think you should just do whatever you feel is best, co-sleeping, whatever that is. But for me, the routine has helped me then have my routine and my freedom.

• 1:06:34Gary Brecka?

  Yes.

• 1:06:34Speaker 00

  Her being on a routine has given her structure in her day, but also me structure in my day, knowing when I have, have time for work as well. So, yeah.

• 1:06:44Gary Brecka?

  So, well, guys, as I wind down all of my podcasts, I ask all my guests the same question, I asked it to you the last time you were on the podcast, if you remember. But before we head into the VIP community, what, what does it mean to you to be an ultimate human?

• 1:07:05Speaker 00

  Well, now as a mom, I think being the ultimate human is really about being truly proud of myself and looking at myself through my daughter's eyes. Like, would she be proud of me?

• 1:07:21Gary Brecka?

  Hmm.

• 1:07:21Speaker 00

  And passing that on and kind of giving everything that I am to her. And yeah, I think that would make me, in this phase of my life, the ultimate human.

• 1:07:35Gary Brecka?

  Amazing how that's changed in just a few short months.

• 1:07:38Speaker 00

  Exactly, yeah. Thank you so much for having me.

• 1:07:41Gary Brecka?

  You're so welcome. Thank you for coming on. And until next time, guys, that's just science.