Pretty Little Episode #72

Tig and Mae give advice on some spicy situations and ring in the New Year with the first Pretty Little Episode of 2026! Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterSubmit your questions to speakpipe.com/handsomepod http://speakpipe.com/handsomepodFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.com http://handsomepod.com/Watch Handsome on YouTube http://youtube.com/@handsomepodThis is a Headgum https://headgum.com/ podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter https://x.com/headgum, Instagram https://www.instagram.com/headgum/, and Tiktok https://www.tiktok.com/@headgum. Advertise on Handsome https://gumball.fm/shows/handsome via Gumball.fm http://gumball.fm/. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  This is a HeadGum Podcast.

• 0:04Mae Martin?

  Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking whether I brought my sunglasses before driving west at the end of the day? A learning moment. I'm gaining confidence in my driving, but it helps when I'm not blinded by the sun beaming directly into my eyeballs.

• 0:17Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, checking first is handsome, so check Allstate first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.

• 0:34Mae Martin?

  Handsome is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all-in-one platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online with a handy, handsome website you can be proud of and show off to all your friends, clients, and loved ones. With Squarespace, you can scale up your business, claim your domain, and showcase your offerings with a premium, professional website.

• 0:53Fortune Feimster?

  With Squarespace's cutting-edge design tools, you can build a gorgeous online presence that perfectly fits your brand or business. Their SEO tools help your ideal audience find you. Since every dream needs a domain, Squarespace makes it easy to find the best name for your business at one fair, all-inclusive price. No hidden fees, no required add-ons. Squarespace offers countless extras like built-in donation tools for fundraising, and online payments and invoicing to help you get paid on time. Squarespace makes it easy. So easy, we even made a handsome website ourselves in less than 20 minutes.

• 1:25Mae Martin?

  So what are you waiting for? Get started on your dream website today. Head to Squarespace.com/handsome for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code HANSOME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Handsome, handsome, chatting with friends on the handsome part.

• 1:43Fortune Feimster?

  Chatting with friends on the handsome part. Pretty little episode.

• 1:50Mae Martin?

  Welcome to a very pretty little episode of the Very Handsome Handsome Pod. I'm Mae Martin. I'm with?

• 1:57Tig Notaro?

  Ah, you are. May, you're with Tig Notaro.

• 2:02Mae Martin?

  Yeah, I am.

• 2:03Tig Notaro?

  That's who I am. You know, I want to make sure to not forget this, but I was with Stephanie and a friend of ours having coffee recently, and this woman who must have been 9,000 years old, walking with a cane, walked past us, tapped me on the shoulder and said, "I know who you are, little girl."

• 2:27Mae Martin?

  Little girl? Oh, my God.

• 2:31Tig Notaro?

  And I thought, but I, at first, I thought it was little lady. And I thought, does she listen to the podcast? And I was like, she doesn't. There's no world. There's no world.

• 2:42Mae Martin?

  Oh, my God.

• 2:42Tig Notaro?

  I mean, truly barely moving with her cane, and she had somebody assisting her. Maybe she didn't even, maybe I was the wrong person.

• 2:50Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 2:50Tig Notaro?

  But it was, it was quite amusing.

• 2:53Mae Martin?

  Can you imagine going up to a man and going, "I know who you are, little boy"? It just wouldn't happen.

• 3:01Tig Notaro?

  Well, I'm gonna do it now.

• 3:03Mae Martin?

  Yeah, please do. Yeah.

• 3:05Tig Notaro?

  How's it going, May?

• 3:07Mae Martin?

  It's going all right, thanks. I guess this is coming out start of, start of the new year. I'm eating a Honeycrisp apple, or I've paused for the pod, but I'm about halfway through.

• 3:17Tig Notaro?

  And wait, remind me, have you always enjoyed an apple crisp?

• 3:21Mae Martin?

  Well, I-

• 3:22Tig Notaro?

  Or is it Honeycrisp?

• 3:23Mae Martin?

  Honeycrisp. And when I, I was getting groceries and I usually go Fuji. And then I had your voice in my ear going, "May?"

• 3:32Tig Notaro?

  Honeycrisp.

• 3:33Mae Martin?

  Your classic, when you really want me to absorb a piece of like, and you go, "May, let me tell you, Honeycrisp." And I was like, "I'm doing it." And they're delicious. They're so sweet.

• 3:43Tig Notaro?

  They're unreal and so crisp.

• 3:45Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 3:46Tig Notaro?

  So crisp. Well, good. We just got, we got five new Honeycrisps here at the Notaro Allen home.

• 3:54Mae Martin?

  An abundance of riches.

• 3:56Tig Notaro?

  Well, you would think, except Max and Finn eat apples all the time. So that'll last us about- Until tomorrow. Yeah, yeah, they'll be gone.

• 4:07Mae Martin?

  I I've been, I mean, maybe I would talk about this on a full episode as well, but you know, I failed my driving test.

• 4:15Tig Notaro?

  You did?

• 4:16Mae Martin?

  I did, Tig.

• 4:18Tig Notaro?

  May.

• 4:19Mae Martin?

  I know. And I am so annoyed at myself for telling everyone in the world on the podcast, the date of the test, telling everyone in my life. And everyone was saying to me, there is no way you're gonna fail. This is, and it's the easiest DMV in LA. It's like, I don't even have to parallel park. And I fucking failed.

• 4:40Tig Notaro?

  What did you fail?

• 4:42Mae Martin?

  Well, so the problem started with my, my driving instructor who's 75 and he, we're, we're at the DMV and he likes to chat and I'm lined up waiting, like I'm about 20 minutes away from taking the test. And he's showing me on his phone, this movie that he was in as an actor in 1975 called Mussolini's Last Act. And so I'm, I'm kind of trying to focus. I'm like, okay, so what are they gonna test me on again? He's like, I have a line coming up. I'm about to arrest Mussolini. And then

• 5:15Tig Notaro?

  No.

• 5:16Mae Martin?

  Yeah. And in the movie, they've edited in like real footage of the Second World War and Mussolini's execution. So I'm looking at real dead bodies. I'm about to do the test. And I was going, Robert, I can't do this right now. He was like, all right, all right. Well, just wait here. I'm coming up again. You can, that's me there.

• 5:31Tig Notaro?

  No, Robert.

• 5:33Mae Martin?

  So then it starts.

• 5:35Tig Notaro?

  It's Robert's fault.

• 5:37Mae Martin?

  Well, he's my, I'm not gonna blame Robert. It was

• 5:39Tig Notaro?

  I was.

• 5:40Mae Martin?

  I am gonna blame someone else.

• 5:42Tig Notaro?

  You can't show somebody a dead body and then expect them to parallel park.

• 5:46Mae Martin?

  Thank you.

• 5:47Tig Notaro?

  You're welcome.

• 5:49Mae Martin?

  So my, my examiner comes, Robert gets out of the car, examiner gets in.

• 5:54Tig Notaro?

  Examiner?

• 5:55Mae Martin?

  Is that a word? I don't think that's a word.

• 5:58Tig Notaro?

  That sounds very Arnold Schwarzenegger.

• 6:02Mae Martin?

  Examiner.

• 6:05Mae Martin?

  The tester?

• 6:07Tig Notaro?

  The examiner? Thomas, please help us. I feel like you're just leaving us wondering.

• 6:13Mae Martin?

  Watching us.

• 6:13Speaker 04

  Examiner?

• 6:14Mae Martin?

  Examiner.

• 6:15Tig Notaro?

  Examiner. Oh, I like examiner.

• 6:18Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 6:18Tig Notaro?

  But go on.

• 6:19Speaker 04

  Yeah, that's better.

• 6:21Mae Martin?

  So I'm like visibly nervous and shaky and it's like all my skills just go out the window. But I was doing really well and everything was good until I turn on, he says, turn right. I turn onto like a bigger street and almost immediately.

• 6:36Tig Notaro?

  Went off a cliff.

• 6:37Mae Martin?

  Yeah. And almost immediately I go off a cliff.

• 6:40Mae Martin?

  I crawl out of the wreckage.

• 6:43Mae Martin?

  So I turn, he says, merge left. I do my checks. I look in the mirror. There's no one behind me. And I guess I sort of slowed down a bit, but in the time that it took me to turn from my blind spot and then I start merging, someone pulled out behind me and went into the left lane and accelerated. And I almost hit them and the guy, the examiner had to grab my wheel and.

• 7:08Tig Notaro?

  May, you need to stay home.

• 7:09Mae Martin?

  I know.

• 7:10Tig Notaro?

  This doesn't sound safe for anybody.

• 7:12Mae Martin?

  I think it was my reaction to an unsafe driver was not.

• 7:16Tig Notaro?

  Mm hmm.

• 7:17Mae Martin?

  I was.

• 7:18Tig Notaro?

  Well, I was gonna say out of the gate, whether you're taking your test or you're just a person trying to get from point A to point B, being nervous and shaky driving.

• 7:28Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 7:29Tig Notaro?

  It's probably not gonna go well.

• 7:32Mae Martin?

  I know. And I was like, and I kept saying to him, I'm so nervous, which didn't help. And, and then after that happened, so it was like a big dramatic, like he grabbed the wheel and I went, whoa. And I went, oh, never done that before. I don't usually have that happen. And then I, the whole rest of the test, I was like, am I gonna fail? I'm gonna fail this surely. And then we get back and he goes, so that was an immediate disqualification. And I just start bawling in the car. I start crying.

• 8:02Tig Notaro?

  No. Oh.

• 8:04Mae Martin?

  Old Robert gets back in the car. He's going, hey, you passed. You definitely passed, right? And he said, I said, no, Robert, I failed. And he said, well, I've only had two people ever fail. I've been teaching driving for 40. Years and I said, oh, cool. He said, two people, you and you and one other person who didn't get their driver's license. And I said, well, what happened to him? And he said, well, he passed away before he could take the test.

• 8:29Tig Notaro?

  You're the only surviving failure?

• 8:31Mae Martin?

  Yes.

• 8:32Tig Notaro?

  Oh, my God. Well, that's something to celebrate. You're surviving.

• 8:37Mae Martin?

  I'm surviving out here and it's hard out here.

• 8:41Tig Notaro?

  It did deliver you a wonderful story.

• 8:44Mae Martin?

  That's true.

• 8:45Tig Notaro?

  So there's that.

• 8:45Mae Martin?

  I'm retaking it on Christmas Eve.

• 8:48Tig Notaro?

  You know, what should probably happen is me, Fortune and Thomas should probably be in the car with you.

• 8:54Mae Martin?

  During the test?

• 8:55Tig Notaro?

  Yes, and be like, turn, turn, turn. Honk, who's that? Slow down. Well, I have faith that you'll you'll get it this time around.

• 9:04Mae Martin?

  I'll be way less nervous.

• 9:05Tig Notaro?

  Now, did you have like all of those signs that say like student driver all over the car and?

• 9:12Mae Martin?

  Yes, this douchebag.

• 9:13Tig Notaro?

  That would be such a delight to see go past is Mae Martin.

• 9:19Mae Martin?

  Swerving.

• 9:20Tig Notaro?

  Driving a car. Oh, my God, to see student driver go off a cliff. Anyway.

• 9:25Mae Martin?

  God, I just wish I hadn't told everyone in my life because everyone was going, it is a piece of piss in LA. This is no problem. You got this. And then I had everyone texting me and I got people on Instagram who listen to the pod going, let's, let's see the license.

• 9:43Tig Notaro?

  I think it's great. And also, piece of piss, I've never heard that.

• 9:49Mae Martin?

  Yeah, British.

• 9:50Tig Notaro?

  Yes, yes.

• 9:51Mae Martin?

  Yeah, piece of piss. I like that one.

• 9:53Tig Notaro?

  I've learned a couple of things from the cadets on the Starfleet Academy that I'm on.

• 10:00Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 10:01Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, because they're a lot younger and they use certain terms that where I'm like, wait, I'm sorry, what did what did you say? One of the things I learned, which I'm sure you've heard because I'm just sure is baddie. Have you heard? Not like somebody's cuckoo baddie, but like, like B A D D I E or B A D D Y. Have you heard of that?

• 10:26Mae Martin?

  Yeah, like a badass. It's like, it's like, oh, you're a, yeah. Oh, they're a baddie. Not like a, not actually bad, but very cool.

• 10:34Tig Notaro?

  Like hot and cool.

• 10:35Mae Martin?

  Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I like that.

• 10:37Tig Notaro?

  Okay.

• 10:38Mae Martin?

  Do you like that?

• 10:39Tig Notaro?

  I, sure. It's fine. I don't feel one way or the other. I was just like, when Stephanie and I were going to bed last night, as we were dozing off, I said, have you, have you heard of baddie? And she was like, yeah. But she meant baddie like cuckoo.

• 10:56Mae Martin?

  Like an old lady who says hello, little girl.

• 10:59Tig Notaro?

  Hello, little girl. I, I know you, little girl. Meanwhile, I have gray hair and yellow teeth and wrinkles. But, um, yes, it's me. Little tiny, little tiny tig.

• 11:12Mae Martin?

  Okay. I know you too, baddie.

• 11:15Tig Notaro?

  Old baddie. Old bat. Old baddie. Anyway, well, you're gonna do it, kid.

• 11:21Mae Martin?

  Thanks. I've been practicing every day since the test and I'm really

• 11:24Tig Notaro?

  Oh, no.

• 11:25Mae Martin?

  Just focusing on merging.

• 11:27Tig Notaro?

  Should we get into a question since that's why we've met up today?

• 11:31Mae Martin?

  Yeah, let's do it.

• 11:32Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 11:33Speaker 00

  Hey handsome, this is Hannah. Um, I have an advice question for you because you said that you love those. So what would you do if you have two friends that are dating and one of them is cheating on the other? For context, they're both in their mid 30s. They've been dating for like five years and they're about to move in together. And it was not a one time cheat. It's been consistent for like nine months with someone who's around a lot.

• 11:55Tig Notaro?

  Wow.

• 11:59Mae Martin?

  Listen.

• 12:05Mae Martin?

  As someone who's been cheated on and I, I say, you say to the cheater, if you don't tell your partner, I'm going to tell them in one week. So I'd say you got one week to do this before I, I tell them.

• 12:20Tig Notaro?

  Have you ever had to do that?

• 12:22Mae Martin?

  Uh, no, actually.

• 12:24Tig Notaro?

  Mm hmm.

• 12:24Mae Martin?

  Yeah. And I've, I've cheated on people too, but not when I'm like about to move in with someone and like, like sometimes at the end of a relationship that gets a little messy crossover when you're sort of one foot out the door. But man, when you're about to embark on a big life step.

• 12:42Tig Notaro?

  Mm hmm.

• 12:43Mae Martin?

  That's such a choice.

• 12:45Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. I'm in a similar, but not exact situation where

• 12:51Mae Martin?

  Oh, my God.

• 12:51Tig Notaro?

  Somebody.

• 12:54Tig Notaro?

  That I've drifted from. I know that her very best friend is talking out of both sides of her mouth. And has said some not great things about this person and like a in a really interesting way.

• 13:15Mae Martin?

  Interesting. Okay.

• 13:17Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 13:18Mae Martin?

  That's so complicated because you've drifted from the original person.

• 13:22Tig Notaro?

  Uh huh.

• 13:24Mae Martin?

  Is there anything that the best friend is saying that even though you're morally like this is gross that you're talking shit? You're like, I do concur.

• 13:32Tig Notaro?

  Oh, I do concur, but the best friend is not acting, not acting like they have those feelings or thoughts or have said anything disparaging at all. And I'm like, wow, wow.

• 13:47Mae Martin?

  But what a weirdly like out of alignment way to be living like. Yeah. So would you, are you going to say something to the friend?

• 13:55Tig Notaro?

  I've thought about reaching out to the friend and just saying, you know, I feel like you've confided in me and your actions don't line up with what you've shared with me. And what do you say about that?

• 14:14Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 14:15Tig Notaro?

  You know, I have it written out already. It's just, when do I press send? Yeah.

• 14:21Mae Martin?

  Oh, my God.

• 14:22Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, it's a complicated thing, but I do, I do think it's worth handling.

• 14:30Mae Martin?

  I do too.

• 14:31Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 14:32Mae Martin?

  When I lived in England and I was dating like a closeted person for three and a half years. And we were in our twenties and everybody's a mess in their twenties and our friend group was all a mess and, you know, so I don't hold on to it, but when I look back, I think everyone knew that we were together and no one called her out on it. No one privately said, hey, we know you're with me and this is weird. Like, yeah, everyone just was too polite, too like, it's not my business. And I think it's worth calling people out.

• 15:04Tig Notaro?

  It also feels like something you can't ride to the end, but you have to make the attempt. Because when you think about, would I want that for myself? I most certainly would. And, um, and so I just mean, like, I don't know if it's a world where you can continue to follow up with that person and say, you gotta make things right, you know? Um, but I think you can put in your, your best attempt. And, and if that doesn't work, then you might have to move on to the direct, uh, victim.

• 15:43Mae Martin?

  I guess always weighing up like, how much drama in my own life is this gonna cause? And is it, you know, is there a way to mitigate that?

• 15:52Tig Notaro?

  You could also sneak in a question around that person of like, you know, I feel like most people would say, yeah, I'd want to know the truth, but like, at least get that information.

• 16:04Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 16:05Tig Notaro?

  You know?

• 16:06Mae Martin?

  Yeah, like, or even make it about you, like, be like, I would always want to know.

• 16:11Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 16:11Mae Martin?

  Wouldn't you?

• 16:13Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 16:13Mae Martin?

  Oh, God.

• 16:15Tig Notaro?

  Good luck, Hannah.

• 16:16Mae Martin?

  For the record, if you ever, you gotta just tell me and call me out of my shit. I'll do the same.

• 16:23Tig Notaro?

  Mm hmm. So you'd want to know?

• 16:26Mae Martin?

  I'd want to know if I was being cheated on or, or talked about. Yeah.

• 16:29Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 16:31Mae Martin?

  I think so.

• 16:31Tig Notaro?

  And look, people, I think it's fair, you can, you know, let off steam and complain about somebody or whatever. That's part of, yeah, it's like, when I hire somebody, when I'm like, look, I'm gonna annoy you to no end. You're gonna annoy me and I'm, you know, but I'm not gonna like,

• 16:51Mae Martin?

  Like slander your character.

• 16:54Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, if I do, it'll be privately to my wife.

• 16:57Mae Martin?

  Yeah. Yeah, like I have, um, my, my two best friends, Gabby and Nicole, like we, our whole, we've been best friends since we were 13 and our whole friendship is like, if I'm with Gabby, we're talking about Nicole. If I'm with Nicole, we're talking about Gabby. When they're together, they're talking about me. But it's all with so much love, but it's like, of course.

• 17:16Tig Notaro?

  It's like, people are gonna talk about you. But, um, yeah. Anyway, well, let's hear what Hannah, Hannah has to say.

• 17:23Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 17:24Speaker 00

  So to answer this question, I mean, I haven't decided what to do, but part of me wants to give him an ultimatum and say, listen, you gotta tell your partner before she moves in, before she uproots her life from her neighborhood and you gotta tell her, or I will.

• 17:38Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 17:38Speaker 00

  But also, the easier route is to do nothing. But the secret's weighing on me. Anyways, I'm excited to hear your response. Thank you.

• 17:47Tig Notaro?

  See, that's why it's not the easier route, because it's weighing on her.

• 17:51Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 17:51Tig Notaro?

  It is not the easier route.

• 17:53Mae Martin?

  Yeah, and oh my God, what, it's not gonna stop here. Like, what happens two years in and they're getting married?

• 18:01Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, they invite you over for dinner or something. You're gonna sit there with them. Like, it's not easier. Anyway, and obviously, every situation's different. People can chime in and be like, well, I did this and this happened. This is just a general sense. Like, it's just not gonna get easier if that's going on.

• 18:24Mae Martin?

  I mean, if you're really worried about your friendship with this guy, then you could do an anonymous thing. You could say, I'm a concerned party and you need to, yeah, you could just write a note that says, I know what you did last summer.

• 18:40Tig Notaro?

  I actually just came up with the best fix.

• 18:42Mae Martin?

  Oh, hit me.

• 18:44Tig Notaro?

  Let your friend hear this episode.

• 18:46Mae Martin?

  Yes. Oh, God. And maybe we'll disguise the voice, so it's.

• 18:54Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 18:54Mae Martin?

  Yeah. Should we hear, do we have time for one more?

• 18:57Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, let's do it.

• 18:58Mae Martin?

  Let's do a little guy.

• 18:59Speaker 05

  Hi, my name is Mara. I'm a pretty little lady outside Washington DC. And I was calling to ask for some advice.

• 19:07Tig Notaro?

  Great.

• 19:09Speaker 05

  I am coming out of one of the hardest years I have had in the last 20 years. And I know all three of you have had, like, famously very difficult stretches. So the advice I am hoping for is, what do you do to mark for yourself that you're done? Like, that you have gotten through something and that you can move on? Thank you.

• 19:38Mae Martin?

  Great question, I think.

• 19:41Tig Notaro?

  What, what, what do you have to say?

• 19:43Mae Martin?

  Well, I kind of think the moment you know you're done is when, rather than like, you know, a new horrible surprise, like ripping you apart, it is comical to you because there's just, you've famously had that feeling of like, are you kidding me? And I think that shows you've reached a point of real resilience. But then in terms of marking it, well, I always feel like that's tempting fate because then other bad stuff could happen. So rather than be like, I'm finished having calamity and being sad. I just think just every moment, remember it's, you could completely, everything could change in a moment in a positive way, like just trying to maybe get a tattoo. I don't know.

• 20:26Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, get a hot dog on your nose.

• 20:29Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 20:30Tig Notaro?

  But, uh, yeah, I, I don't know if this is really great. But, but you know, I know for myself, I used to, um, I'd, I'd have PTSD on, every year that came up, I'd be like, this is when I first started to feel off. This is when this happened. This is when I got the call about this. This is when I got this call. This is when I was in the hospital, you know, it just was like, because it was such a short period of time, I kept like, I was, I could tell you every day, every moment, every month, that everything happened. And then it was really wild where kind of the best and biggest marker was when I wasn't marking anything anymore.

• 21:15Mae Martin?

  Oh, that's so nice.

• 21:17Tig Notaro?

  Where I was like, I got through March and April and May and June and I just, I was like, I didn't even, I didn't even remember.

• 21:28Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 21:29Tig Notaro?

  Like I, you know, it just, it was such a freeing feeling and, and I, I carry that with me every year. It's like, those months are coming, you know? March was the last time I felt even remotely normal. And then, and, and it, because my birthday is in March, it was a little bit of a bummer because my mother died a couple of days later and, um, it just was heavy. And, and now I'm like,

• 21:58Tig Notaro?

  How about that? I'm not, I'm not marking anything. I'm just going along.

• 22:03Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 22:03Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. So that, that not marking anymore was the biggest marker that I could hope for.

• 22:11Mae Martin?

  That's really true. And when you're not counting days, like how long it's been since, and, and when you're, and when you start, I mean, and this is different to like a health thing, or but for me, it's usually a big breakup or something like when you finally get bored of yourself talking about it. And I'm really investing also in, and this is probably shitty for the friends who've counseled me all through this, but I'm, I'm like, I want to also spend time with people who are not inside this situation, or who are, you know what I mean? And I'm talking about fresh things, or just, yeah.

• 22:48Tig Notaro?

  And I don't know if it was you, or the podcast, or a friend, but you know, it's also so helpful when you, it sounds cliche, but it's true. But when you help other people when you're feeling terrible.

• 23:03Mae Martin?

  A hundred percent.

• 23:04Tig Notaro?

  Unreal what that does. Unreal.

• 23:07Mae Martin?

  And I'm so lucky. I love my job. So like, like I did like a charity show at Largo the other night for the LA mission. It was just like, oh yeah, there's, yeah.

• 23:17Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. So when you turn the attention away from yourself and, and try and help others, especially in those moments, it kind of gives you that perspective and clarity. And that's what I think.

• 23:30Mae Martin?

  Around the holidays too. So many people are struggling. Get out there and you can volunteer, or

• 23:37Tig Notaro?

  Jingle your bells.

• 23:38Mae Martin?

  Jingle your little bells around the town. Yeah.

• 23:41Tig Notaro?

  Yeah.

• 23:42Mae Martin?

  Yeah. This was a really, this, I felt like I needed this today. This was a really nice little episode. Thanks, Tig.

• 23:49Tig Notaro?

  Yeah. Thank you, May. Thanks, Thomas.

• 23:52Mae Martin?

  Thomas.

• 23:52Tig Notaro?

  Thanks, listeners.

• 23:54Speaker 04

  Thanks, May. Thanks, Tig.

• 23:57Mae Martin?

  I am. Getting ready for this tour, this big tour that's like 47 shows now. So there's still tickets. It's selling fast, though, but I particularly need to sell tickets in Houston. February 27, I'm in Houston at Cullen Performance Hall and Dallas as well. So check out maymartin.net. Come see me. I'm going to be doing stand up. I might do a couple of songs and I might have an improviser with me and do some improv. It's going to be like a, like a whole evening of ridiculousness.

• 24:29Tig Notaro?

  Amazing.

• 24:30Mae Martin?

  Yeah. How about you?

• 24:31Tig Notaro?

  I'm going on my tour in the new year and gosh, where will I be? February 20th, Oklahoma City. I will also be in Midland, Texas. February 21st, Texas folk, come on out. You can also catch me in, on March 12, Charleston, West Virginia. March 14, Chattanooga, Tennessee. And there's so many other dates. April 26, Red Bank, New Jersey. Go to tignotaro.com. Also, if you still haven't seen Come See Me in the Good Light, it is the documentary about Andrea Gibson and Meg Faley on Apple TV.

• 25:12Mae Martin?

  And keep submitting your questions to us and your requests for advice. I like that to speakpipe.com/hansampod. And yeah.

• 25:20Tig Notaro?

  And rate and review, rate and review and, and subscribe. Also, check out our YouTube. Yeah, please. Until next time.

• 25:31Mae Martin?

  Keep it.

• 25:31Tig Notaro?

  Keep it pretty handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, Fortune Feimster, Tig Notaro, and Mae Martin. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Woolett. Email us at [email protected] and follow us on social media at HandsomePod.

• 25:57Speaker 00

  That was a HeadGum Podcast.