#2300 - Kyle Dunnigan

Kyle Dunnigan is an Emmy, Peabody and Writer’s Guild Award winning comedy writer. He also is the creator and host of “The Kyle Dunnigan Show." tour tickets at https://www.kyledunnigancomedy.com/ Get a free welcome kit with your first subscription of AG1 at drinkag1.com/joerogan Go to ExpressVPN.com/ROGAN to get 4 months free! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  The Joe Rogan Experience.

• 0:18Speaker 01

  You know who wrote that?

• 0:19Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 0:19Speaker 01

  Pop quiz.

• 0:20Joe Rogan?

  Who?

• 0:21Speaker 01

  Very famous person wrote.

• 0:23Joe Rogan?

  Where does that from? What show is that from?

• 0:26Speaker 01

  Seventies.

• 0:28Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 0:28Speaker 01

  Begins with an S.

• 0:30Joe Rogan?

  Stanford and Son.

• 0:31Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 0:32Joe Rogan?

  Who wrote it?

• 0:33Speaker 01

  You're not gonna believe it. Quincy Jones.

• 0:35Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 0:36Speaker 01

  Yes. And if you hear the whole song, it's a really good song.

• 0:40Joe Rogan?

  I used to love that show. Stanford and Son was fucking great.

• 0:43Speaker 01

  Funny.

• 0:44Joe Rogan?

  It was funny, ridiculous. Redd Foxx was the man.

• 0:47Speaker 01

  He was so funny on that. I actually didn't like that theme song.

• 0:51Joe Rogan?

  Here we go.

• 0:53Speaker 01

  When I first heard it.

• 0:58Joe Rogan?

  That was back when sitcoms were sitcoms.

• 1:00Speaker 01

  Oh. That one was like way, I felt like way, like Three's Company sucked if you watched that now. But that was like the number one sitcom. Stanford and Son's still good.

• 1:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. You know what's underrated that I really never gave a chance?

• 1:14Speaker 01

  Wait, I wanna guess.

• 1:14Joe Rogan?

  Big Bang Theory.

• 1:15Speaker 01

  Oh, fuck.

• 1:15Joe Rogan?

  Fuck, I fucked it up, sorry.

• 1:16Speaker 01

  I would've said Big Bang Theory.

• 1:18Joe Rogan?

  It's a good show. I used to shit on it, cuz I saw clips with, you know how you do retakes?

• 1:24Speaker 01

  Where they're not laughing?

• 1:25Joe Rogan?

  No laughs, yeah.

• 1:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:26Joe Rogan?

  But that's, you know what that is? That's like retakes. Um, when you work on a sitcom, sometimes you have to do pickups?

• 1:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, I actually don't know, but yes.

• 1:34Joe Rogan?

  Oh, you do pickups and nobody knows anymore. Nobody does it anymore.

• 1:39Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:39Joe Rogan?

  Miss Pat is like the only person I know with a sitcom.

• 1:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, I couldn't name one sitcom.

• 1:45Joe Rogan?

  Think about all the comics we know. I know one comic with a sitcom, Miss Pat, and it's on a streaming. It's on, um, BET.

• 1:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, and that was everything. When I was first starting, like, your whole thing was like, you have to get a sitcom or you don't have any money.

• 2:00Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, or you're never gonna have a career. Because you needed, there was no way to get people to come see you in the clubs. Unless you had a special, or unless you had a sitcom.

• 2:09Speaker 01

  Yeah. And I remember Zach Galifianakis, like, it was pilot season, remember that whole thing?

• 2:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:15Speaker 01

  That was huge, like, pilot season's coming up.

• 2:17Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, everybody would be in town for pilot season.

• 2:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 2:20Joe Rogan?

  And everybody would be like, a special kinda anxious.

• 2:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:24Joe Rogan?

  Cause your whole fucking career was laying on this moment where you walked into this room. And there was these weirdos, these casting people, there were always really socially bizarre people.

• 2:37Speaker 01

  And like tired and mad they've seen some people and it's always a tiny room.

• 2:41Joe Rogan?

  And you, they're the kings and you are a peasant begging for a bowl of soup.

• 2:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, and when you walk in, they know they don't want you, like.

• 2:49Joe Rogan?

  They also know you're broke.

• 2:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, and you have that desperate energy.

• 2:53Joe Rogan?

  You want them, they want them to like you. Hi, hi guys, want, want you to like me.

• 2:58Speaker 01

  Off putting is what it is.

• 3:00Joe Rogan?

  Death.

• 3:01Speaker 01

  I didn't get any, I never got a sitcom, I auditioned probably for a thousand. I don't know why someone didn't say this isn't, you're not good at this, no one told me.

• 3:08Joe Rogan?

  You could have been on Big Bang Theory ironically.

• 3:10Speaker 01

  I could have been.

• 3:11Joe Rogan?

  You would have been a fucking major get for them.

• 3:13Speaker 01

  I would have been a huge get for them.

• 3:15Joe Rogan?

  Show would have been a lot better.

• 3:16Speaker 01

  I had, um, actually I did get one of them. Now this is a story, let me tell you this story.

• 3:20Joe Rogan?

  Okay.

• 3:22Speaker 01

  So, uh, I go in and you know, you get like a callback, okay? First casting director and then you're like, please like me, then you're like callback and like, oh, they like me. Second callback, now I get like real nervous, I can make a, it was a show Happy Family, have you heard of that?

• 3:36Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 3:37Speaker 01

  Little Nugget?

• 3:39Joe Rogan?

  What year are we talking about?

• 3:40Speaker 01

  Two thousand and three. A long time ago. That guy, Larrakett was on it.

• 3:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 3:46Speaker 01

  I remember him saying, he was, you know, he's dropping on the set and he goes, my friend Don told me, um, that on my gravestone it should say, uh, it's not a great plot, but Larrakett's in it. He told that funny joke.

• 4:00Joe Rogan?

  Boy. He was, uh, the John Larrakett Show was on the same lot, uh, as I was when I was filming News Radio. And, uh, Lenny Clark, who's a good friend of mine forever, Lenny was on that show. And, you know, I'd run into Lenny in the parking lot, we'd talk, but we would watch their feed where John Larrakett would like yell at people.

• 4:21Speaker 01

  That's you, the feed is always, they forget there's a feed.

• 4:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, people were screaming about, but no one had a cellphone back then. You know, we're talking the 90s, so this is probably 94 or something like that.

• 4:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 4:33Joe Rogan?

  And it was a bizarre scene, man. I, I'd never adjusted to be on television, never did.

• 4:39Speaker 01

  That's a good gig, though. I mean, shit, that was like...

• 4:42Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but I couldn't wait to not do it anymore once I did it.

• 4:45Speaker 01

  Really?

• 4:45Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, and I had the best version of it. I had the best version of it. Hilarious cast, brilliant writers.

• 4:52Speaker 01

  What was that?

• 4:52Joe Rogan?

  The stress of it, it was just like, I just wanted to do stand-up.

• 4:56Speaker 01

  You get to, cause you're getting a little famous, and then you have eight lines.

• 5:00Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 5:01Speaker 01

  And you said they could do whatever you want, and you're like, blah, blah, blah.

• 5:03Joe Rogan?

  Listen, as far as, that was also the problem, is I knew I was never gonna get another sitcom like News Radio. The other sitcoms that I read for were, ugh, they were fucking garbage.

• 5:13Speaker 01

  After that, did they want you to do some, something after News Radio?

• 5:16Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, there was a few opportunities. I had a couple of development deals to do stuff. But then when Fear Factor came on, my first thought was like, yes, no actors.

• 5:26Speaker 01

  Oh, really?

• 5:27Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I didn't have to deal with like, the whole thing. Like, the whole thing of the schmoozing and the, you know, going to these award things and these parties and these press junkets that you had to do. It's like, I didn't like it.

• 5:40Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 5:41Joe Rogan?

  It just felt, I don't know.

• 5:44Speaker 01

  I did...

• 5:44Joe Rogan?

  It was just weird. You know, I never auditioned for anything. Like, I auditioned for a couple commercials in New York. I auditioned for two shows ever.

• 5:54Speaker 01

  We're bringing it back to my laraquette story. Don't think we forgot. No, no, I want to hear this. I'm just, I want to say it out loud, cause I, I set up a story and then I didn't finish it.

• 6:01Joe Rogan?

  So I got this show when I was living in New York. It was called Hardball, and I came out here to LA.

• 6:06Speaker 01

  Oh, wait a minute.

• 6:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it was a baseball show.

• 6:09Speaker 01

  I, I remember...

• 6:11Joe Rogan?

  Jim Brewer was in the pilot with me.

• 6:13Speaker 01

  I, I saw like...

• 6:14Joe Rogan?

  Mike Starr from Goodfellas was in it.

• 6:16Speaker 01

  I don't know that guy.

• 6:17Joe Rogan?

  Uh, Bruce Greenwood, who was in Star Trek. He's been in everything. He's a great actor. He was in it. He was like the older pitcher that was like my nemesis. Terrible show. Terrible show. Like, so bad.

• 6:28Speaker 01

  I think I saw that guy, like the...

• 6:30Joe Rogan?

  So bad.

• 6:31Speaker 01

  The intro of it or something. I remember Hardball.

• 6:34Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it lasted six episodes. And then the other show that I got was News Radio, and it was the only other show I auditioned for. It was just, so I'm so, everything else I auditioned for was like movies and stuff that I'd never got. And there was a couple of shows after news radio was over that I auditioned for that I didn't get. But it was just like, it was so bizarre. So when I would go to these auditions for other things, it wasn't that big a deal because I was already on news radio. So it wasn't like, if I didn't get these things, it was like, this'll be okay. But it was like, still, the anxiety of that. Like, I had money and it was still like, oh, this is awful. Like, this whole thing is so stressful and so weird. And everybody's so fucked up because you get a bunch of people that desperately want attention.

• 7:15Joe Rogan?

  And then you go there to this place where you're surrounded by people who desperately want attention in Hollywood. And then you're, you have this one moment in front of these people. And they're looking at you like this, "Okay, Kyle."

• 7:27Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm. Hi.

• 7:29Joe Rogan?

  So you're reading for Bobby, correct?

• 7:31Speaker 01

  I love the script, it's so funny.

• 7:32Joe Rogan?

  You know, Bobby's an athlete.

• 7:34Speaker 01

  Yeah. No, I can do all the things, whatever you say, I can do it, I'm good at it.

• 7:38Joe Rogan?

  Right, okay. Um, Tim here's gonna read with you, and Tim, like, could barely read. It's always like some PA, who's fucking, he's probably on ketamine, could barely read. And you have to like, pretend like you're having this emotive moment with Tim.

• 7:52Speaker 01

  I'm so glad I don't have to do that.

• 7:54Joe Rogan?

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• 8:35Joe Rogan?

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• 9:19Joe Rogan?

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• 9:59Joe Rogan?

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• 10:41Joe Rogan?

  Fucking love it. Like McConaughey, that fucking dude loves like pouring himself into a role, get getting psychotic about who the character is.

• 10:50Speaker 01

  That's I wish I if I could go back, I wish I looked at those as like, someone said this as like an opportunity to perform instead of like, I'm trying to get something.

• 10:58Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 10:59Speaker 01

  I didn't, I was just desperate, like I had no money and I was gonna have to get this.

• 11:02Joe Rogan?

  I will say though, if you're on a sitcom that has really good writing, it's fun as shit. News Radio was fun.

• 11:07Speaker 01

  You said you just got it. How did you just?

• 11:09Joe Rogan?

  Just I had a development deal with NBC and they were gonna do, I was gonna do my own show, but they had a sitcom that they were already greenlit. And Ray Romano was on it and Ray was like the maintenance guy. And Ray got fired during the pilot, which is like the best thing that ever happened to him. He goes on to do the Ray, everybody loves Raymond and it's fucking huge, bigger than News Radio ever was. So like he, he gets fired and another guy got hired and then he got fired. So I didn't feel bad because I'm friends with Ray. I love Ray.

• 11:40Speaker 01

  There's, I bet you that part just was not good. It wasn't the actor's fault because you audition and then.

• 11:46Joe Rogan?

  I don't know what it was. It's like, you never know what they want. Like when Paul, the guy who created it, Paul Sims, is this brilliant guy who worked on a, um, fucking.

• 11:58Joe Rogan?

  Larry HBO.

• 12:00Speaker 01

  Larry?

• 12:01Joe Rogan?

  Larry Sanders. Larry Sanders, thank you. He worked on Larry Sanders. He was a brilliant, brilliant guy. And he did a very clever thing, like in the, um, the auditions.

• 12:09Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 12:09Joe Rogan?

  The first audition I read for, it wasn't funny. Like on purpose. They wanted to cut out all the people who were hamming it up.

• 12:16Speaker 01

  Right.

• 12:17Joe Rogan?

  I was like, oh my God, this writing is nothing. So I'm like, I don't know what this is. So like, you know, the NBC asked me to go in and read for it. I, I memorized this stuff and I was like, I don't even know what I'm saying. This doesn't make any sense. So I go in and I do it. It's like real flat. And I say, thank you. And all of a sudden I have a callback. And then they send me the callback sheets and it's hilarious. And I was like, oh, whoa.

• 12:37Speaker 01

  They wanted to see if you could turn something not funny into funny.

• 12:39Joe Rogan?

  Thing that everybody hated was the hammy, hammy sitcom actor. Come on Bobby, what are you doing?

• 12:46Speaker 01

  You're, you're good at that. That's really good.

• 12:48Joe Rogan?

  Seen a lot of those guys. So they wanted to avoid that and. So then, you know, they they had a callback and it was just like me and two other guys. And these two other guys looked like they just got back from Vietnam. They were sweating, they're fucking pale in the face.

• 13:02Speaker 01

  That makes you confident, right? When you see someone nervous, you're like, oh, okay.

• 13:05Joe Rogan?

  Super confident. I looked at these guys like, oh, they can't handle pressure. And I and I sat back on the couch and put my feet up on the coffee table like a dickhead.

• 13:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, you did?

• 13:14Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, I was waiting. We were in the waiting room.

• 13:16Speaker 01

  Oh, I thought you meant in the room.

• 13:18Joe Rogan?

  I was looking at these guys panicking and I was like, oh, it's just us?

• 13:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. I got this. I had I had just like a sketch show, one of the rare things I got. And the guy, I was so out of my mind nervous and I could hear in the door, this guy not doing good, panicking. And I just got calm and I was like, I got this.

• 13:34Joe Rogan?

  Isn't that nice?

• 13:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 13:35Joe Rogan?

  Oh, so good.

• 13:36Speaker 01

  Then the show got canceled.

• 13:37Joe Rogan?

  Well, they all get canceled.

• 13:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, like ninety percent of them don't, maybe even more, right? Don't do the make it.

• 13:42Joe Rogan?

  Most of them never make it to a second season and definitely most of them never make it to syndication. They, you know, they go a few episodes and then they get canned.

• 13:51Speaker 01

  I was on, oh, go ahead.

• 13:53Joe Rogan?

  No, I'm just saying if the production company's not making money, the network's not making money, it's not getting ratings.

• 13:57Speaker 01

  I was in a situation, it was Cedric the Entertainer Presents, it was a sketch show. And it was like, I was so excited.

• 14:02Joe Rogan?

  I remember that.

• 14:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, I I joined mid-season.

• 14:04Joe Rogan?

  What year is this?

• 14:05Speaker 01

  Two thousand and three. And I, a big year for me. Um, so I, I get there mid-season, they're like, we need a white guy to like pick on. You know, I was the token white guy. And Louis CK was a writer, it was like a great frickin' show. And this, he got into like a fight with the fox. Here's where I knew things were downhill. Now, I didn't sell my car. I had a really, and I'd pull up to like the good spots and it was like Lamborghini, you know, go back. And then, and it wasn't just a shitty car from like the early eighties. It was like, I had gotten like four accidents, it was just a chunk. And I just was like, and it's so broke in a tiny apartment, I'm like, let me just see if I can.

• 14:48Speaker 01

  But it seemed like this was a hit show, it was doing well. Okay, so then it's like, first thing, first sign it was like, hey, there's a fox party tomorrow. And I was like, oh, cool, I made it in Hollywood. So I go to this thing and I'm like, where's Cedric? And they're like, oh, he got into a big fight with the pet of fox. He told me he was he was a douchebag, some some fight. And I'm like, that doesn't sound like a good idea.

• 15:12Speaker 01

  To get, so I'm like, it'll be fine. So then, this is, we were about to go on Right After American Idol, which was like the biggest show in the world.

• 15:21Joe Rogan?

  Ooh.

• 15:22Speaker 01

  So we're like, get ready for the rocket ship. And then this guy put Wanda Sykes show, took Cedric off the air for like, six weeks to put Wanda Sykes, not, not there, but like, yeah, to move the spot. So Wanda's show was after, and then Wanda's got amazing, um, you know, views, so it gave them excuse to cancel Cedric, even though Cedric was a hit, it was like a F you.

• 15:45Joe Rogan?

  Cedric seems like a nice guy.

• 15:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, he was very cool, nice to me.

• 15:48Joe Rogan?

  How, what happened?

• 15:50Speaker 01

  He did get on the phone during my audition though, at one point. I was in the middle of auditioning, and he was like,

• 15:56Speaker 01

  yeah, and it was kind of a casual call, it was clearly like not an emergency. And I just like powered through, but he was very cool, good guy, but.

• 16:04Joe Rogan?

  There's a different, like, culture of stardom versus people that want to be on a show. Like, you, you're not the equal.

• 16:15Speaker 01

  What do you mean?

• 16:15Joe Rogan?

  Like, if you're auditioning for a show and the guy who has the show is in the room, there's this weird, you know, what is that? Number one on the call sheet, there's a documentary about, uh, black actors? And it's not, not black actors, it's just actors, period, in general. Like, I experienced that a lot in the news radio days with guys who were big movie stars, and they would like big time you, in the weirdest way. Like, you couldn't just say hi to them, you couldn't hang out with them. There's a few guys that just like, they were just really gross. And then there was guys like John Ritter, who was like the fucking nicest guy in the world to everybody.

• 16:51Speaker 01

  Right.

• 16:52Joe Rogan?

  Nicest guy in the world.

• 16:53Speaker 01

  Stories about John Ritter.

• 16:53Joe Rogan?

  Nicest guy in the world. Camera people, joking around with the makeup lady, fun.

• 16:58Speaker 01

  Heart attack.

• 16:59Joe Rogan?

  Died. Young man.

• 17:01Speaker 01

  I know.

• 17:02Joe Rogan?

  Fucking young, before the vaccine. Young.

• 17:05Speaker 01

  He took it. He was the first guy.

• 17:07Joe Rogan?

  He was such a sweetheart on the set. Such a nice guy.

• 17:11Speaker 01

  I had, um, that Cedric show was also, I had like an episode where it was like my episode, you know, where it was like, I had like three sketches I wrote that was gonna be, you know, it was my big coming out. And I literally came out, right? Now it's like, what's going on, you guys? And shock and awe started. Remember the Iraq war? And it just was gone. And I told everybody like, it's my big show. And it just, that happened and then the one, and it just was over. And I was back to, I never sold my car, I was back to my studio apartment.

• 17:41Joe Rogan?

  Couldn't you think that studio executives would be wise enough to go, look, we got Louis CK, we have Cedric the Entertainer, we have a fucking show. Let's figure out a way to promote this correctly.

• 17:50Speaker 01

  And it was funny. It was just, and it's so hard to make a funny sketch show. They try to plop people together. You need, you know, real synergy with the cast and the writers have to figure out how people are funny.

• 17:59Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 18:00Speaker 01

  That's where the first, yeah, the first set of SNL cast, they already worked together. And like, that's why they were like gelled right away. I mean, one of the reasons. But all these sketch shows they put together, and they'll say, don't pitch a sketch show, they never work. It's because they like pluck people who don't even do sketch, you know?

• 18:17Joe Rogan?

  It's like putting together a boy band.

• 18:18Speaker 01

  Exactly, yeah.

• 18:20Joe Rogan?

  You know, like you have to put together a fake band. Not a bunch of guys who grew up together in Seattle, been playing in the basement. No.

• 18:26Speaker 01

  That works better, though.

• 18:27Joe Rogan?

  Find some, yeah, that works better.

• 18:29Speaker 01

  If you put them, just put a bunch of hot dudes together.

• 18:32Joe Rogan?

  Get some good hair. Let them Milli Vanilli it up.

• 18:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:35Joe Rogan?

  Remember those days?

• 18:36Speaker 01

  Milli Vanilli.

• 18:37Joe Rogan?

  They got a bad deal.

• 18:38Speaker 01

  Not to change topics, but.

• 18:39Joe Rogan?

  They got a bad rap.

• 18:40Speaker 01

  Like now they'd be fine.

• 18:41Joe Rogan?

  They'd be fine. No one cares if that's your voice. You're hot. I love your dreadlocks.

• 18:45Speaker 01

  Great, great look.

• 18:46Joe Rogan?

  Great bodies.

• 18:47Speaker 01

  Great bodies.

• 18:48Joe Rogan?

  Dancing around.

• 18:48Speaker 01

  Great cocks.

• 18:49Joe Rogan?

  Girl, I know it's true.

• 18:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's a.

• 18:52Joe Rogan?

  Ooh, ooh, ooh.

• 18:53Speaker 01

  I do like their music.

• 18:54Joe Rogan?

  I love you. No, you don't.

• 18:56Speaker 01

  I do.

• 18:56Joe Rogan?

  They got you at the time. Remember there was the other one? Um, there was a, a song. God, um, it was like a big time band and there was like this beautiful woman who was singing. And it turned out it wasn't really her singing. It was some, some big, heavy lady who was actually singing.

• 19:16Speaker 01

  Oh, always, yeah, it was like a big, Milli Vanilli was a big fat guy, too.

• 19:20Joe Rogan?

  It was one of those fucking, something factory. What was the band? Yes.

• 19:26Speaker 01

  They didn't say?

• 19:27Joe Rogan?

  There was a situation like that, right? Wasn't there? Where some lady?

• 19:30Speaker 01

  I didn't know that.

• 19:31Joe Rogan?

  Jamie will find it.

• 19:32Speaker 01

  Jamie finds everything.

• 19:33Joe Rogan?

  He knows everything.

• 19:35Speaker 01

  Jamie hates me.

• 19:36Joe Rogan?

  No, he doesn't. He loves you.

• 19:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, he does. I heard him talk shit about me.

• 19:39Joe Rogan?

  We talked about you earlier today. He was saying nice things. He's bipolar.

• 19:41Speaker 01

  I know.

• 19:42Joe Rogan?

  He got hit by a golf ball.

• 19:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, I saw his. He's so cool. I want that. I was watching him. He's got that really cool golf set back there.

• 19:50Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah. Jamie can golf his ass off. I have a buddy who got hit in the head with a golf ball. He said he was fucked up for six months.

• 19:55Speaker 01

  Oh, really?

• 19:56Joe Rogan?

  He got hit in the head with a line drive. Just dunk.

• 19:59Speaker 01

  I hit a kid with a golf ball. He was all right, though. Luckily, I didn't get a good swing on him.

• 20:06Joe Rogan?

  I see those guys that like do those power swings on the internet, like where they loop their arm around and fucking drive through and like some magic getting hit with one of those balls.

• 20:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 20:16Joe Rogan?

  It's like getting hit with like a fucking, like a shotgun shooting a rubber bullet at you.

• 20:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. They're really, um, yeah, if you get a nice skull worm burner, you could kill a duck if you just.

• 20:27Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 20:27Speaker 01

  You ever see those videos of geese's head just snapping?

• 20:30Joe Rogan?

  No, but you ever see that one where the pitcher catches the bird in mid-flight?

• 20:34Speaker 01

  Yes. Amazing.

• 20:36Joe Rogan?

  Crazy. It's like, what are the odds that it would perfectly be there when it's a hundred mile an hour pitch? Who was that? Was that Randy?

• 20:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 20:44Joe Rogan?

  Was it?

• 20:45Speaker 01

  Randy, what's his last name? Randy Johnson.

• 20:46Joe Rogan?

  Randy Johnson.

• 20:48Speaker 01

  He was so tall. He was like halfway to the thing. Oh, no.

• 20:51Joe Rogan?

  Martha Wash, most famous unknown singer of the 90s speaks how a voice behind "It's raining men, gonna make you sweat" and "Strike it up" went from being a bullied victim to an industry pioneer. So which song was it? The CNC Music Factory song?

• 21:05Speaker 01

  Uh, "Gonna Make You Sweat, CNC Music Factory." She's cute. Why didn't they give her a shot?

• 21:09Joe Rogan?

  I don't know.

• 21:10Speaker 01

  I didn't know what CNC Music Factory looks like. Were they good-looking?

• 21:13Joe Rogan?

  They probably were. Well, that was the move back then. You get good-looking people. They dance around.

• 21:18Speaker 01

  Now you just get AI to do it.

• 21:19Joe Rogan?

  Well, this was the first time where they were experimenting really with images in a way where you're, everything's visual. It's all video. You know, like MTV was so important. It was so important.

• 21:32Speaker 01

  I like the ugly years of musicians.

• 21:35Speaker 03

  Sweats the same song as Everybody Dance.

• 21:37Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's it.

• 21:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:39Joe Rogan?

  So that's it. So it's some other lady in the video was singing it, but that lady was the real voice behind it. But she just didn't look like they wanted her to look.

• 21:48Speaker 03

  Uncredited vocals on the chorus.

• 21:50Joe Rogan?

  Which is just so crazy. Like, you don't think, like, look what's happened with, like, Lizzo. Do you think, you don't think that would have happened in 1994? Of course it would have, if you just tried it.

• 21:59Speaker 01

  Everybody. That reminds me of college. I went to school for acting, which is the dumbest thing you can ever go to school for.

• 22:05Joe Rogan?

  What did you learn?

• 22:06Speaker 01

  Nothing.

• 22:06Joe Rogan?

  What'd you learn?

• 22:07Speaker 01

  Honestly, I learned to be the worst actor. I really do believe that. Yeah, because it was like Shakespeare and stuff. And like, I'm terrible at that. All my teachers thought I was just terrible. And they did this one class.

• 22:17Joe Rogan?

  Athletes have to be very careful about how they treat their bodies, something everyone wants to do, actually, right? So it's no surprise that they're very particular about what they eat and drink. It's no surprise that a lot of pro athletes rely on AG1 to help them stay at peak performance, just like me. AG1 is more than a drink. It combines a multivitamin, multi-mineral blend of superfoods and more into one simple scoop. And it's NSF certified for sport, which, if you don't know what that is, it basically means it's been put through tons of testing for over 280 banned substances. And trust me, you don't want any of that stuff in your body. And it really is as simple as one scoop, once a day. I have it in the morning. It gives me confidence.

• 23:02Joe Rogan?

  I need to take on the day. Try AG1 for yourself. It's something that I've actually been consistent with, and that's why I partnered with AG1 for so long. Try AG1 and get a free welcome kit, a free bottle of vitamin D3 K2, and five free AG1 travel packs with your first subscription at drinkag1.com/joeroogan. That's a $76 value gift for free if you go to drinkag1.com/joeroogan. Check it out.

• 23:30Speaker 01

  Literally, like, this was called Movement for the Actor. Now, imagine, like, your parents, my parents paid for college, which is so nice of them. I don't have any debt. But like, what a waste of my parents' money. It was, this is an hour class, Movement for the Actors. They'd put on music, like, Everybody Dance, that was one of the things. And then you're supposed to just creatively, like, do whatever. So these are a bunch of weirdos.

• 23:53Speaker 01

  Like fifty thousand dollars. So I'm in the, and I'm in my head like, what the fuck is, this doesn't make me a bad, so you're fake and, and then um, this teacher was like, we're doing Shakespeare, he's like, bring in tights next week for the Shakespeare, your performance. And I'm like, I'm not buying tights and coming in here with tights. Like, why would I have to do that? Cause back then, they, they dressed in their normal clothes. You know what I mean? Like Shakespeare wrote the thing, they were just in their clothes. It wasn't like getting tights to do Hamlet. So I just didn't get tights and I come in, he's like, where's your tights? He was like this like very effeminate guy who hated me.

• 24:32Speaker 01

  He goes, he goes, where are your tights Kyle? And I was like, oh, I forgot my tights. He's like, make sure you bring your tights next week. And I was like, okay. So next week, no tights. And I go, oh, I forgot my tights. Like, darn it.

• 24:45Joe Rogan?

  Is that how you said it?

• 24:47Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, I was like, oh.

• 24:47Joe Rogan?

  That's probably your best acting.

• 24:49Speaker 01

  Brought my tights, yeah. I was really good at acting, like I didn't, like I wanted to bring my tights. So he goes, get mine, they're in, they're in the back, you know, there was like, so I, these green tights.

• 24:58Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that'd been hugging his balls.

• 25:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, I had to like put them on and I was, I looked like Kermit the Frog, cause my legs are like the size of a twelve year old Korean girl. And I came out with my, it was disgusting.

• 25:09Joe Rogan?

  Kermit the Frog.

• 25:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, I look like Kermit.

• 25:12Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 25:13Speaker 01

  By the, and I did tell him, I said, listen, cause I tried to negotiate before I put his tights on, I'm like, but they didn't, they just wore their clothes like back then. And he was like, get the tights. Like, I wanna see you in tights.

• 25:24Joe Rogan?

  Brian Callen was always going to acting schools and he knew they were ridiculous. But I don't, I think like Brian at one point in time was like completely enamored with the idea with being in, in Hollywood, like he had a bunch of like famous actor friends and he'd go to famous actor parties and he'd take acting classes. He's always working on his craft.

• 25:43Speaker 01

  I love that, working on my craft. By the way.

• 25:46Joe Rogan?

  But he was bullshitting. He was, he was, but he was aware. He was fucking around. Like, like, when he would say working on my craft, he wasn't being serious. He was completely joking.

• 25:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, he's very.

• 25:54Joe Rogan?

  So he had this teacher that was, I think it was a Scientology hustle too, was one of those things. So there was a lot of that, particularly in the nineties. Where the teachers were Scientologists. But insert, by the way, there's not to pick on Scientology, insert whatever religion. There's a, there was a lot of Scientology that was in Hollywood, though. But what they would do is they would get people to join the acting class and they would try to recruit them into Scientology. Cause the teacher was a Scientologist. How important it was.

• 26:22Speaker 01

  To be in Scientology?

• 26:23Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, how important it was for his craft or something. Meanwhile, they're never successful. The people that teaching the acting classes, they're always terrible. They, they never go anywhere. Like, maybe they have like a small part on one thing and then they're gonna tell you how to make it.

• 26:38Speaker 01

  When I was a teacher, I didn't think I'd ever be, yeah.

• 26:40Joe Rogan?

  Not to say, there's not good acting teachers out there. I'm sure there are. There's people that just like love theater. They love like that kind of act. They have no desire to be famous. They love the craft. They love the art of it. That's, that's true too, right? Um, but anyway, this guy, he was really into show tunes. And, uh, he would do a big show, uh, you know, the end of the class or whatever, in the quarter. Whatever it was, he had this big show at this local theater and Brian's like, you have to come. And watch a guy with the tiniest feet you've ever seen in your life. He had these little, I couldn't take my eyes off his feet. Cause he had loafers on and they were like that big. And this guy would sing like so passionately these show tunes. From like musicals, like there's no context. You don't, you didn't see the musical.

• 27:25Speaker 01

  Like a medley, like a review of, I love, that sounds like a great show. Well, you came there for his, for his, to see his feet? That was like the why you went there?

• 27:33Joe Rogan?

  Which Brian was like fascinated by how small his feet were. And then I couldn't stop, cause we were high, so I couldn't stop looking at his feet.

• 27:38Speaker 01

  Small, that?

• 27:39Joe Rogan?

  No, they were tiny. They were like size five. They were little, little tiny feet.

• 27:43Speaker 01

  I had a date of this girl once and she was like, I have a shoe show. I'm a shoe model, right? And I'm like, oh, a shoe show. Okay.

• 27:49Joe Rogan?

  A shoe model?

• 27:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, foot.

• 27:51Joe Rogan?

  A foot model?

• 27:52Speaker 01

  Like, she would model shoes.

• 27:54Joe Rogan?

  Okay, like open-toed shoes?

• 27:56Speaker 01

  I just would, like, I didn't know, but that's what she would say. She was going to do this. And she always had like dollar bills. She always had cash, you know? And I found out years later, she was a stripper. Shoe show is when you have no clothes on. And I just thought, she was a shoe. Oh, by the way, here's another.

• 28:11Joe Rogan?

  I thought it was going to another. I thought guys would pay to jerk off to her feet.

• 28:16Speaker 01

  Maybe, she had great feet, but I, another stoop, this was even the dumber class than the moving around class was called interpretation for the actor.

• 28:26Speaker 01

  So this week, you would read a play like, um, Streetcar Named Desire, and then you'd come in and you'd do your interpretation of it. So the weirder you were, the better grade you got, okay?

• 28:37Joe Rogan?

  Oh, boy.

• 28:37Speaker 01

  So one guy comes and he did Streetcar, and, uh, he put, there was a big mirror, you know, cause there's also a dance room, and he took a lipstick and he wrote whore within lipstick. This is, if you know what Streetcar. Yeah, then he pulled his pants down, started fucking the mirror, and then he turned to us and he goes, "Fuck you," and he left, and then everyone started clapping, and I was like, "I gotta get the fuck out of here."

• 29:04Speaker 01

  Listen to what I, so I'm like, cause I got like a, like a D on my, whatever I did, so I'm like, I'm gonna be fucking weird my next, I didn't read any of the things. I like, I have trouble reading. I don't know how to read. I just never learned. So, I go, uh, I go, I have Glass Menagerie is my book. Didn't read it, whatever. I just went in there, I got an egg, okay, and I had a, I took one of my mother's, uh, Waterford crystal glasses and a string, and I took the string and I was just like, "Nobody sails the seas if they don't find their way." Then I clipped the string and the glass fell

• 29:45Speaker 01

  and broke, then I went outside, you could see, and I buried an egg. It makes no fucking sense. And then the guy said, "What grade you think you should get?" And I said, "An A," and he gave me an A. That was, that was my college work.

• 29:57Joe Rogan?

  He's brilliant.

• 29:58Speaker 01

  By the way, I'm working on my craft. By the way, are you really working, like, when you were? Meryl Streep was an amazing actress when she was 20 and she's amazing now. She never, no, are you working four hours a day getting better at acting? No, you're not, there's.

• 30:13Joe Rogan?

  You're not training.

• 30:14Speaker 01

  There's a little bit you can kinda learn, but that's, you're done after a little bit.

• 30:18Joe Rogan?

  If you're not Daniel Day-Lewis already.

• 30:20Speaker 01

  Fucking love that guy.

• 30:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, if you're not that guy already, you're probably never gonna be able to do that.

• 30:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, they, they talk like they're like working their piano skills all day and four days a year. You're crap. You know, the problem what we did was, is we were like, we, not, not me at all, but when they were like, oh, let's make some more money. We'll have an award show and then we'll make money. That's why there's the Oscars, is they're.

• 30:42Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 30:43Speaker 01

  But the actors thought, we're doing something really great.

• 30:47Joe Rogan?

  The Oscars are like the Olympics for actors.

• 30:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, and it's, I mean, the Olympics, at least you're like, I don't know, doing something you can quantify, but like.

• 30:56Joe Rogan?

  Right, right, right, right.

• 30:57Speaker 01

  A nine-year-old won an Oscar, like, how, like, there's not gonna be like a nine-year-old like best surgeon. It's like, it's a thing you can do or kinda can't do. There's a little bit of learning, but certainly not movement for the actor or.

• 31:09Joe Rogan?

  It's not brain surgery.

• 31:10Speaker 01

  No.

• 31:11Joe Rogan?

  It's not working on your craft.

• 31:12Speaker 01

  It's not even like.

• 31:13Joe Rogan?

  It's not painting.

• 31:15Speaker 01

  It's not even like when you crunch a ball and you throw it into a basket like at work. It's, the skill is like.

• 31:20Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's one of the few, it's one of the few careers where it's a benefit to be out of your fucking mind.

• 31:28Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's about personality. Like, I love, we, we love the person, like Jeff Goldblum, like, love that guy, Christopher Walken. Amazing, like, there's amazing actors.

• 31:36Joe Rogan?

  The people party.

• 31:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 31:38Joe Rogan?

  Crazy, wild people.

• 31:39Speaker 01

  You know, the story behind it to be.

• 31:41Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 31:41Speaker 01

  God, I miss Jack Nicholson.

• 31:43Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, he was the best.

• 31:45Speaker 01

  He was the, just.

• 31:46Joe Rogan?

  He was the best.

• 31:47Speaker 01

  Did you ever see him flirt with Jennifer Lawrence? Did you ever see that video?

• 31:49Joe Rogan?

  No. How old was he at the time? A thousand?

• 31:53Speaker 01

  He was one thousand. Wait, Jamie, do you have that? I don't mean to run this show, but.

• 31:58Joe Rogan?

  Bro.

• 31:59Speaker 01

  It's a, it's a good schooling on like, he's so cool, and this girl's way too young for him, but, um. It reminds.

• 32:10Speaker 00

  If you want to talk politics, we can.

• 32:14Speaker 00

  Thank you. Yeah, you're being really rude.

• 32:21Speaker 00

  Good to see you.

• 32:25Speaker 00

  Oh my god, thank you. I loved all your movies. Oh, really? Do I look like a new girl, bro?

• 32:34Speaker 01

  I thought about it.

• 32:37Joe Rogan?

  You think that...

• 32:38Speaker 01

  I thought about it.

• 32:39Joe Rogan?

  So it became flirtatious, but it was mostly just complimentary about her movie. What movie was that?

• 32:45Speaker 01

  He stayed cool and he's just... He makes that eye contact and then...

• 32:50Joe Rogan?

  It's like you need crazy people to make great movies.

• 32:52Speaker 01

  She was flirting, actually, probably with him.

• 32:53Joe Rogan?

  She flirted with him.

• 32:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 32:54Joe Rogan?

  You need crazy people to make good movies. You need it. You need a guy who's gonna pretend he's Lincoln for four months.

• 33:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, there will be blood, I just saw the other day.

• 33:02Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god, phenomenal. What's that?

• 33:05Speaker 01

  I drank it up.

• 33:06Joe Rogan?

  What was it?

• 33:07Speaker 03

  Silver Linings Playbook, I think her and Bradley Cooper.

• 33:09Joe Rogan?

  I didn't see that one.

• 33:10Speaker 01

  I drank your milkshake.

• 33:12Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god, it was so good. He was so good. He was such a great psychopath.

• 33:16Speaker 01

  It's like, if I read that movie, I think I'd be like, this is boring. There Will Be Blood is just...

• 33:22Joe Rogan?

  Right, I'll drink your milkshake, what?

• 33:23Speaker 01

  At the end, he's talking to that guy who's religious, who's like, can I have some of your... And he's like, no, there's no more oil under you. He's like, I drank it up! I... And he just made the analogy of a straw, like drank up his thing, and then he beats him with a...

• 33:39Joe Rogan?

  Bowling pin.

• 33:40Speaker 01

  Bowling pin, and he's like, I'm finished. One of the best endings to a movie.

• 33:45Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it was a fucked up movie.

• 33:47Speaker 01

  I knew it was...

• 33:47Joe Rogan?

  So that's a different thing, you know? That kinda acting?

• 33:50Speaker 04

  ...to take it out of the ground. Listen, listen, listen. I paid him $10,000 cash in hand.

• 34:01Speaker 04

  He has his own company now. A prosperous little business, three wells producing $5,000 a week.

• 34:09Joe Rogan?

  Why is this dude crying already?

• 34:11Speaker 04

  Stop crying, you sniveling ass!

• 34:12Speaker 01

  He needs money, he got broke.

• 34:13Speaker 04

  Stop your nonsense!

• 34:14Speaker 01

  And he's coming back to like beg him.

• 34:16Speaker 04

  You're just... Afterbirth, Eli. No. Slithered out on your mother's filth. Oh. They should have put you in a glass jar, on a mantelpiece.

• 34:30Speaker 04

  Where were you when Paul was suckling at his mother's teeth? Where were you? Who was nursing you, poor Eli? On a bandits' sound? That land has been had, nothing you can do about it, it's gone. Hat, if you would just take this lease, Daniel. Drain it! Drain it, Eli, you boy! Drain, drive, I'm so sorry.

• 34:56Joe Rogan?

  Cut to the part where he kills him.

• 34:58Speaker 04

  If you have a milkshake...

• 35:01Joe Rogan?

  Is it in there?

• 35:02Speaker 04

  I have a milkshake.

• 35:02Joe Rogan?

  No, they cut it out.

• 35:03Speaker 04

  And I have a straw, there it is, that's the straw, you see? Watching? My straw reaches across the room and starts to drink your milkshake. I drink your milkshake!

• 35:27Speaker 04

  I drink it up! Don't bully me, Daniel!

• 35:34Speaker 01

  So good.

• 35:37Speaker 01

  Choices, they say, in school, it's the choices you make in your performance.

• 35:41Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's also you gotta be out of your fucking mind. You gotta be able to become that guy.

• 35:45Speaker 01

  I know, but then...

• 35:46Joe Rogan?

  And most people can't do that. Most people can't lie that good.

• 35:48Speaker 01

  Yeah, he, I mean, he becomes those people where...

• 35:52Joe Rogan?

  Becomes them.

• 35:52Speaker 01

  But to live with that guy would be probably a nightmare during that movie.

• 35:55Joe Rogan?

  Oh, would be a nightmare.

• 35:56Speaker 01

  Well, he's Lincoln.

• 35:57Joe Rogan?

  Imagine that guy's your roommate?

• 35:59Speaker 04

  Who ate mine?

• 36:00Speaker 01

  My Cheerios.

• 36:03Joe Rogan?

  All day long, he's a murderous psychopath. And what if he slips into character too much?

• 36:09Joe Rogan?

  What if he lights your house on fire? Just to stay in character?

• 36:12Speaker 01

  At least he does back it up. Do you know what I mean? Like, he hasn't done anything too crazy.

• 36:16Joe Rogan?

  Well, there's a lot of people that do that. Like, they play a brawler and they start fights with people on the streets. You know, like, people get crazy with film roles, with who they become.

• 36:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, who was that guy?

• 36:27Joe Rogan?

  But that's how you got a great movie.

• 36:28Speaker 01

  Who was that guy?

• 36:29Joe Rogan?

  Christian Bale?

• 36:29Speaker 03

  Jared Leto was sending people stuff, I think, as the Joker. Jared Leto was doing weird shit when he was the Joker.

• 36:34Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 36:34Speaker 01

  I don't like when they go too far with it, like...

• 36:36Speaker 03

  Might have been rumors too, but...

• 36:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, the Batman guy, remember that whole thing where he was screaming at the guy for getting in the way of his lighting or something?

• 36:44Joe Rogan?

  No, the guy was moving around, the background was distracting. And he's like, "Can't you a fucking professional?" Remember that?

• 36:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:51Joe Rogan?

  Because he was in, like, some heavy scene.

• 36:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, but...

• 36:53Joe Rogan?

  That does happen, man, where people don't pay attention and they're on their phone and they're fucking off in the background. And they're right in the eye line.

• 37:02Speaker 01

  The thing that I found interesting about that was his accent didn't... Because he kept an American accent when he was screaming, so...

• 37:09Joe Rogan?

  Interesting.

• 37:10Speaker 01

  I found that quite interesting, yes, indeed, yes.

• 37:13Joe Rogan?

  That guy's another fucking amazing actor. Another amazing actor.

• 37:17Speaker 01

  What was that psycho movie, American Psycho? So good.

• 37:20Joe Rogan?

  Insane. But the craziest thing he ever did was when he almost died, making that machinist movie. Got down to, like, 120 pounds. He played a guy with narco... It's a terrible movie. Not terrible, it's just not very good. But, I mean, to have a guy who's like a leading man and almost die for a movie that no one saw. Ask yourself this: Who has access to your medical history? In theory, it's just you and your doctor. But in reality, hundreds of shady companies called data brokers are keeping tabs on every symptom you Google, every treatment you research, and every pre-existing condition they think you might have. That's valuable intel for advertisers and insurance companies who'll take any excuse to raise your premiums.

• 38:06Joe Rogan?

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• 38:48Joe Rogan?

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• 39:15Speaker 01

  I almost, I almost got, I got a movie was like the only, it was right in between, it was Joaquin Phoenix's movie. It was so bad, the only movie I like I ever got. And it was between the Joker and the next, it was like set up to be this big movie. It was Gus Van Zant movie. And I, to get the, I was a doctor. I had to say all these like crazy things, technical about the spine and the, and I knew if I could just get through this audition and just say this, I'll get this part, I'll be in the top 10% because everyone's going to fuck up this and be staring at a piece of paper.

• 39:45Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 39:45Speaker 01

  So I did the whole script. I had like, when I tap here, say this, I had a whole thing.

• 39:49Joe Rogan?

  Ooh.

• 39:50Speaker 01

  That made me memorize it. And I went and, and I went and I got it. I go to do the thing, no one talks to me. The guy, the wardrobe guy goes, what outfit you want? He showed me a couple and I was like, this one? I'm choosing the outfit of this doctor? I was like, okay. And then never saw Gus Van Zant. And then I get there and they go, just when they say action, go in there and then do your scene. There was no blocking or anything. And I'm like, okay.

• 40:20Speaker 01

  And I've never done a movie before and I'm like, this is how, I don't think this is how you do it. So they're like, act and they go, go. So I go in there and I'm like, see, uh, Qualm, I've done this whole thing. And Gus Van Zandt comes up after me, he goes, um, have we met before? I auditioned like three times for him and I got the part. And I'm like, yeah. And he goes, you're talking over Joaquin. And I go, oh, don't, don't talk over Joaquin. I couldn't hear Joaquin Phoenix at all because he was just like, doing his lines like that, you know? And I wouldn't think as the doctor talking to like assistants that I would stop talking in the middle of my sentences while he's talking because he was talking to himself. But it was the weirdest thing. Terrible movie.

• 41:04Joe Rogan?

  Was he playing an insane person?

• 41:05Speaker 01

  He was cripple. He was, is that PC? Did we say that? He couldn't, he couldn't move his legs. It was the guy, he was a cartoonist, I'm blanking on the name of the movie, but um, he was a cartoonist and it was just like biopic. And um, I was, it was a very weird experience, but the movie, anyway, my point is, is terrible.

• 41:27Joe Rogan?

  It's terrible movie, but you thought it was gonna be a banger. Thought this was your shock.

• 41:32Speaker 01

  No, because at this point in my career, like the shock and all, like this, these things happen to you over and over again where I'm just like, kind of laugh at it and it's like, uh, okay. I remember I was, I was, uh, yeah. There's been a bunch of situations where like, get ready for the rocket ship, Kyle, because things are about to take off. And I'm always like, okay.

• 41:48Joe Rogan?

  Oy.

• 41:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 41:50Joe Rogan?

  The old rocket ship. Isn't that funny? Like, everybody wants to, it's just the weird anxiety of not knowing if it's gonna work out for you. Such a terrible place to be. Like, that's where the real making it is. The real making it is just not worrying about that anymore. The real making it is just like, oh, I can make a living. That's the real.

• 42:08Speaker 01

  That's a, that's a big hump, yeah.

• 42:09Joe Rogan?

  That's the hump. That's the hump. Like, whenever I tell like, young comics that are just starting to like headline now and, you know, they've got some like viral clips, I'm like, dude, listen to me, you have already made it. Like you're a professional now. This is the hump. Everything now is just stick to the grind, stick to the, it's gravy from here on out. Like you should be so happy. You're talented and you're successful. It's actually happening. People are paying to come see you. I'm like, you got this. Like from here, because everyone's like, man, what if they stop coming? Like, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't. Don't give it to them. You should have fun. Have fun. They want you to have fun. Come on.

• 42:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's almost your job is to have fun.

• 42:47Joe Rogan?

  Your job is to have fun.

• 42:48Speaker 01

  I wish they told, someone told me, because I really did not get this advice for a long, long time.

• 42:53Joe Rogan?

  There's some people that are super successful still don't do that. There's guys out there that are super successful that are paying attention to the ticket sales of other super successful guys.

• 43:03Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, that's not a good place to be.

• 43:05Joe Rogan?

  I'm talking about like arena acts that do that.

• 43:07Speaker 01

  Oh, really?

• 43:08Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 43:09Speaker 01

  That's mental illness.

• 43:10Joe Rogan?

  People get kooky.

• 43:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 43:12Joe Rogan?

  They get kooky with like numbers and their position in the ladder and am I making it? Is it happening?

• 43:18Speaker 01

  What does their name rhyme with?

• 43:20Joe Rogan?

  I'm not telling you.

• 43:21Speaker 01

  Jamie knows. I could tell by the smile.

• 43:23Joe Rogan?

  I like them too. I like a lot of people that think ridiculous things, but it's just, it's a trap that, you know, the, the struggle that led you to become successful at something in the first place, that becomes like your mentality once you're in a different stage of it and you have to adjust.

• 43:39Speaker 01

  It's hard to change.

• 43:39Joe Rogan?

  You gotta be able to adjust.

• 43:40Speaker 01

  It's almost like changing your personality to, to change that habit. I mean, it's really difficult.

• 43:44Joe Rogan?

  Well, everybody adjusts a little bit, right? Because you first get into it because you want attention. Like you first get into it because you think, maybe I could be a comedian. That'd be cool. I'd be on stage. I'd get attention. And then after that, you don't need that. That's not what you really want anymore. Like then it becomes like, I just want it to get better. I just, I'm working on this thing. I just want it to work. I want it to pop on stage. I want to figure out the right beats. I want to figure out the right way to say it. Then it becomes that. And once it becomes that, that's the happy spot. That's where you're happy. When you can just create stuff. You just, you're like, put it together.

• 44:19Speaker 01

  I wish someone told me that because I had a viral, some viral YouTube videos like way back. And I did, I was still on like sitcom. I kind of got a sitcom mentality where if someone was just like, dude, focus on your YouTube. Youtube and get your audience go directly to your audience. Yeah.

• 44:37Joe Rogan?

  Back then, no one knew. No one had any idea. Like, just think about this podcast was started in two thousand and nine. And in two thousand and nine, everybody thought it was a pathetic waste of time.

• 44:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, I remember.

• 44:48Joe Rogan?

  Friends would come over to do my podcast and be like, what are you doing? Like, why are you doing this? It's like, it's such a waste of time. You're on a fucking webcam. But it's, nobody saw that comment.

• 44:56Speaker 01

  Did you?

• 44:57Joe Rogan?

  I would have never given you that advice back then. Just stick to your YouTube.

• 45:00Speaker 01

  You did it because it was enjoyable. You weren't like thinking like this is the way.

• 45:03Joe Rogan?

  I always wanted a radio show, but no one would ever give me a radio show, you know, so I would, when I would do radio shows, like if I would do, sit in on Opie and Anthony. I'd be like, this is so fun. I'd love to do something like this, but then no one's gonna give me one of these fucking things. That's, that's how I thought about it. And so doing, when I saw Anthony Kumia started doing this thing live from the compound, he would do it in his basement. Where he played karaoke with a machine gun. He's out of his mind. He's drunk. He's got ta- like full beer kegs on tap there. He's, they're drinking Guinness and he's fucking doing karaoke while he's holding a machine gun. It was most ridiculous shit. But he had a full professional studio. Where he had green screen, he had like pro microphones, just in his basement for funsies. He just did it for fun.

• 45:44Joe Rogan?

  And I was like, that's what I want to do. I'll do something like that for fun. And then, of course, Tom Green. Like, you go to, Tom Green had that internet show in his living room. And I remember looking around and going, you just gotta figure out how to make money with this. Like, this is, this is a job. Like, this can.

• 45:59Speaker 01

  That's nice. You knew you wanted to do that.

• 46:01Joe Rogan?

  Wow, it just seemed like fun. That's the whole, like, I always loved the opportunity to talk to interesting people or funny people or, you know. I, I'm a questioner. I like to ask questions. Like, how do you, how did you know that? Why'd you do that?

• 46:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, you found the right thing.

• 46:16Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I just got, I, it's just like the opportunity to talk to cool people seems like what a great thing that would be. Because it's always fun to talk to cool people. Like, you, like, if I was ever on those shows and I like ran into someone who was interesting, I was like, wait, how'd you start this? Like, what do you?

• 46:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, you having a lot of interests helped.

• 46:36Joe Rogan?

  Oh, fucking, for sure.

• 46:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, you get.

• 46:38Joe Rogan?

  But back then, I would have told you to get a sitcom. Because there was none, no money on YouTube. Everybody still wanted a sitcom back then.

• 46:45Speaker 01

  The other one guy who didn't, and I was like, he's lying. Zach Galifianakis was like, I don't want to do a sitcom. And I'm like, oh, he's lying. But he actually had like a very. Um, he had his head together.

• 46:56Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he's not lying about nothing. I mean, that guy, he's the least attention whorey of any famous favorite, famous person.

• 47:03Speaker 01

  He never got caught up.

• 47:05Joe Rogan?

  Funny person ever. Not at all. Doesn't he live like on a farm?

• 47:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, he does. He has like a tractor.

• 47:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, very interesting guy. Very smart guy.

• 47:12Speaker 01

  Very smart.

• 47:13Joe Rogan?

  He was, uh, good friends with Brody. And, uh, he was one of the first people to alert me when Brody was off the meds. Like, there was a time when Brody was off his meds. Do you remember that?

• 47:24Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 47:25Joe Rogan?

  People that don't know, we'll talk about our late, great friend, Brody Stevens. Who was like, that, he was so funny. And that, Brody Stevens is like, one of the best examples of, like, it's not what's written on paper.

• 47:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, you wouldn't, yeah.

• 47:38Joe Rogan?

  Right?

• 47:39Speaker 01

  If you got his act on paper, you're like, this is not gonna work.

• 47:41Joe Rogan?

  Right. You'd be like, this is nonsense. This doesn't make any sense at all. Meanwhile, everyone's lining up in the back of the room to see him say these things.

• 47:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think it's like that Andy Kaufman of our, like, little time period there where it was like a different thing.

• 47:52Joe Rogan?

  Andy Kaufman was a brilliant actor and a brilliant comedic actor. He was great on Taxi, but he, I don't think he ever killed on stage like Brody did. Brody was, uh, he brought, one time, we were in the improv.

• 48:04Speaker 01

  Different type of comedy, but it was like, you know, a, a different, when he went on stage, like, people, the comedians watched him.

• 48:10Joe Rogan?

  Yes. It was a different thing. He's doing his own thing. He's doing this Brody Stevens thing. One time, we were at the improv and it's really late. Like, I'd gone up, a lot of people had gone up, the crowd was kinda tired, half the people there. And, uh, they announced that Brody's there and Brody's worried that people are gonna get up, so Brody takes his shirt off and he starts swinging it around in the air over his head and walking through the crowd. "Let's go! Positive energy!" And he gets on stage and he pulls drumsticks out of his back pocket, starts beating the chairs, and he starts talking shit, and, and he just changed the energy of the whole room. Changed the energy of the whole room.

• 48:45Speaker 01

  I don't think there's anybody, like, since him, I can't think of somebody who's, like, replaced. Someone will replace that, but...

• 48:50Joe Rogan?

  They're gonna do it in their own way.

• 48:51Speaker 01

  You gotta go, like, you have, Brody's on stage, you have to go watch. Yeah, and the part of the fun...

• 48:55Joe Rogan?

  Holtzman's like that now.

• 48:56Speaker 01

  Holtzman? Oh, I don't know him.

• 48:58Joe Rogan?

  Brian Holtzman? You don't know Brian Holtzman?

• 49:00Speaker 01

  No.

• 49:00Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my god, dude.

• 49:01Speaker 01

  I stay in my house a lot.

• 49:02Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my god. You let him stay at your house? You don't even know?

• 49:04Speaker 01

  No, I say, I stay at my house.

• 49:06Joe Rogan?

  You've never saw Holtzman at the Comedy Store?

• 49:07Speaker 01

  No.

• 49:08Joe Rogan?

  That's crazy, dude.

• 49:09Speaker 01

  You know what? I might have and just didn't know his name.

• 49:11Joe Rogan?

  Well, he would always gone late at night. And unfortunately, you know, there would be, like, fifteen people left in the crowd, and Holtzman would go on these wild rants. He's like, one of the funniest guys of all time. He's so, he's like a complete, total comics comic.

• 49:25Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. I don't know him well, but-

• 49:27Joe Rogan?

  Holtzman's at our club now all the time, all the time. But now he has a crowd. Now people know about him, so they come to see him. You cannot go there. If, if anything, if you, if you can't tolerate literally everything, don't go.

• 49:42Speaker 01

  What, is he very dirty?

• 49:44Joe Rogan?

  It's not, it's not dirty. It's just, he's out of his fucking mind and some of the, and it's kind of in character, but you're not really sure.

• 49:51Speaker 01

  I like that.

• 49:52Joe Rogan?

  Like Mitzi Shore wouldn't let him on stage for two weeks after nine eleven. She wouldn't let him up. He can't go up.

• 50:01Joe Rogan?

  He's like, Mitzi, I don't understand. I'm not gonna cross any lines. He was like, couldn't wait to cross lines. Do you remember when Susan Smith, that lady drowned her kids?

• 50:08Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 50:09Joe Rogan?

  He goes, "The day, the day." He's on stage. "Ladies and gentlemen, I heard those are bad kids. I heard they sat that close to the TV. They didn't put away their blocks. They always spilt their fucking milk. Those kids are not gonna be missed." And you're like, "What?"

• 50:22Speaker 01

  What does the audience do when they're like, "Yeah, I am?"

• 50:24Joe Rogan?

  Die. Hollywood, Comedy Store, Sunset. Tuesday night or whatever it was, 1 a.m. They went nuts. Everybody went nuts.

• 50:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 50:33Joe Rogan?

  But that was Holtzman. Holtzman got these late spots. So he would say the wildest, most insane shit, but also have a really good point half the time. Like it was comedy wrapped up in a point and then every now and then he'd let you in on it, like that it was just, he's just fucking around and then go right back to it!

• 50:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 50:50Joe Rogan?

  And you, you know, it's, it's a little dance he's doing with the crowd and you gotta know what the dance is. But if you know what the dance is, like comics love him. Like whenever he's on stage, we, we sit in the balcony and watch Holtzman at the mothership.

• 51:01Speaker 01

  It sounds like that other guy who's older and blanking on his name.

• 51:04Joe Rogan?

  Don Bares?

• 51:05Speaker 01

  Nope. Uh... He's like, "What do you people do inherit this hour?"

• 51:11Joe Rogan?

  Oh, Louis Black?

• 51:12Speaker 01

  No. Hmm.

• 51:14Joe Rogan?

  Jesus, who, who are you talking about?

• 51:15Speaker 01

  He's at the store.

• 51:18Joe Rogan?

  Eddie Pepitone?

• 51:19Speaker 01

  Eddie Pepitone.

• 51:21Joe Rogan?

  Eddie's great. Oh, yeah, he's great, too. Very similar in a lot of ways, like just insane energy and, and has a point, but is also saying completely wacky.

• 51:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's, it's, I love like these, like how long careers can be.

• 51:35Joe Rogan?

  Pepitone.

• 51:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, he is.

• 51:37Joe Rogan?

  I think he started late. I, I think Eddie started late. I think so. Well, at least I wasn't aware of him until later.

• 51:44Speaker 01

  It's good we have long career. Like, imagine, I was thinking about sports guys, you know, like you're a baseball player and that's your identity and then you're thirty and you're like.

• 51:50Joe Rogan?

  It's over. You can go to maybe forty. Like, look, Tom Brady, still playing football. What was he, like forty-two when he retired?

• 51:58Speaker 01

  Still, that's youngish to have.

• 52:00Joe Rogan?

  Young as fuck if you're a comic.

• 52:01Speaker 01

  If your, your identity is I'm a sports, you know, player, I'm like a sports player. That's how much I know. I just revealed how, what a good big sports guy I am.

• 52:11Joe Rogan?

  Sports player.

• 52:12Speaker 01

  You know, are you, are you a sports player?

• 52:15Joe Rogan?

  An athlete makes a ton of money for a very short amount of time. That's why they all go broke. Or not all of them, but a large amount of them go bankrupt.

• 52:22Speaker 01

  It's also just like, you, you think about your identity when you're a kid and you probably get all that, you know, identity as a, as an athletic person, then you become like a professional. And must be difficult to just, you have to really never hook into that, like that's my identity. It's also like if you're a really hot woman, I think it's hard when, you know, you gotta like not have that be your identity.

• 52:42Joe Rogan?

  Can't be your whole thing, because one day it's gonna go away. But if you're an athlete, it goes away even quicker than being a hot lady. Like, there's hot ladies that are in their fifties. They're still hot. They maintain their, their looks.

• 52:51Speaker 01

  There's some hot ladies in the fifties.

• 52:53Joe Rogan?

  They, they work out, they take care of their skin, but there's no like super athletes that are in their fifties. Like, they don't exist.

• 52:59Speaker 01

  What about?

• 53:01Joe Rogan?

  Not at a professional level.

• 53:02Speaker 01

  Hold on, let me think.

• 53:04Joe Rogan?

  Go ahead. It's not possible.

• 53:06Speaker 01

  I know athletes. Give me a second here.

• 53:07Joe Rogan?

  There's one guy, I can tell you, that did it into his fifties. Bernard Hopkins.

• 53:11Speaker 01

  He played golf?

• 53:12Joe Rogan?

  No, he was a boxer, world champion boxer.

• 53:15Speaker 01

  A boxer in their fifties?

• 53:15Joe Rogan?

  Multiple division world champion boxer, was beating world champions at fifty years old.

• 53:19Speaker 01

  Did Tyson, was he full on going full on?

• 53:23Joe Rogan?

  I don't know. I'm not Mike Tyson. But I would say by the tone of my voice, you can sense a little bit of skepticism.

• 53:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 53:31Joe Rogan?

  Anybody who's a combat sports athlete looked at that and said, you know, I'm happy Mike Tyson made money.

• 53:37Speaker 01

  It seemed like he held back a little bit, but.

• 53:39Joe Rogan?

  Maybe there was an agreement. I wasn't there.

• 53:42Speaker 01

  That would be lame.

• 53:43Joe Rogan?

  I'm not one for wild speculation.

• 53:45Speaker 01

  No, you're not. No, you don't get involved in anything.

• 53:48Speaker 03

  Gordie Howe was playing until he was 69 years old in 276 days.

• 53:51Joe Rogan?

  Who is that?

• 53:51Speaker 03

  Played one extra game. Gordie Howe.

• 53:53Speaker 01

  Gordie Howe, great, uh, great.

• 53:55Joe Rogan?

  Soccer, uh, hockey?

• 53:56Speaker 03

  Hockey.

• 53:56Joe Rogan?

  He was 69?

• 53:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, he wasn't, he wasn't in the NHL at that point, but he played a professional hockey game at that age, yeah.

• 54:03Joe Rogan?

  That's insane.

• 54:04Speaker 01

  Hey, Joe, can I have a cigar? I want to look manly. I, I need, I need something to, uh, look manly.

• 54:09Joe Rogan?

  Let me get some freshies out of the Chumador. You look very manly.

• 54:13Speaker 01

  I, I mean, I thank you, but I, I, sometimes I look in the mirror and I'm like, that guy looks old.

• 54:20Speaker 03

  Kelly Slater, also pro surfer, still rolling.

• 54:24Speaker 01

  I'm gonna look ridiculous.

• 54:25Joe Rogan?

  Kelly's a, Kelly's a great example. He's another example of someone who just takes care of themselves and just... But, uh, Bernard Hopkins was, uh, what was like Bernard Hopkins World Championship fight that he had when he was in his seven, his 50s?

• 54:39Speaker 03

  Listen to Wikipedia, give, Albert Hughes is the oldest pro boxer at 70 years old.

• 54:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my God.

• 54:45Speaker 01

  That seems like suicide.

• 54:47Speaker 03

  I'm gonna look, I don't.

• 54:48Joe Rogan?

  What year? I know Archie Moore, who was a famous boxer, um, before the, um, Muhammad Ali days. Like, Archie Moore was... That's like way back in the...

• 55:00Speaker 03

  There's video of it. I don't know if this counts.

• 55:02Speaker 01

  What? Oh, that's just sad. No, no, no.

• 55:05Joe Rogan?

  The guy he's fighting does not look like he's trying to hit him.

• 55:07Speaker 03

  He wins.

• 55:09Joe Rogan?

  The old guy wins?

• 55:10Speaker 03

  That's what the video headline says.

• 55:11Joe Rogan?

  This, this looks like someone took a motherfucking dive.

• 55:14Speaker 03

  Win over.

• 55:16Joe Rogan?

  That kid needed money. Yeah, this, this kid's not punching back at all. He's just covering up. This looks super sus. If I was that, oh, and he just goes down? Yeah, if I was the athletic commissioner, I'd have a talk with those fellows. And like, hey, what are we doing here? Is this pro wrestling?

• 55:31Speaker 01

  White Tyson.

• 55:32Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 55:32Speaker 03

  Thirty-six years after his last fights, he has.

• 55:34Joe Rogan?

  Well, I do know that people have been offered fights that are fake fights. Like, they've been offered fights.

• 55:40Speaker 01

  You do know that for a fact?

• 55:41Joe Rogan?

  A hundred percent, one hundred percent. I know people have been offered fights where they said, you will win the fight.

• 55:45Speaker 01

  That's, I don't like that at all.

• 55:47Joe Rogan?

  I know there's celebrity boxing matches and celebrity fights that are like that, where they make a deal.

• 55:52Speaker 01

  Would you ever do a legit fight at some point?

• 55:55Joe Rogan?

  I'm old as fuck, dude.

• 55:56Speaker 01

  No, dude, you're chickens. Bring chicken.

• 55:58Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, no, no, no. No, you shouldn't do that kind of stuff as you get older, I don't think. I don't think your body's as resilient, even if you stay fit and in shape. You don't want head trauma in your 50s.

• 56:08Speaker 01

  I know, I've hit my head so many times in my life, I'm a little worried about it.

• 56:11Joe Rogan?

  So Hopkins broke his own record by winning the IBF light heavyweight title from Tavoris Cloud in 2013. And again, in 2014, we won the WBA super title from Bayboot Shumunov at ages 48 and 49. That's fucking crazy. So he wins two titles, a title at age 48 and a title at age 49. Incredible.

• 56:35Speaker 01

  But those rigged?

• 56:36Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, no, no, no. No, the way that he would box was super intelligent. Like, he was very defensively minded. You didn't get clean shots off on Bernard Hopkins. He was, he was very clever and he understood boxing, like, at a very, very, like, deep level. His footwork was always on point, never drank, never smoked, always took care of his body, ate only organic food, worked out every day, never got out of shape, just all discipline. And so he was able to maintain his body.

• 57:09Speaker 01

  Did you ever have that guy, Brian?

• 57:12Joe Rogan?

  What the hell's this? Oh, what the fuck? It's not working? Piece of shit. These things die.

• 57:17Speaker 01

  That is a piece of shit.

• 57:18Joe Rogan?

  No way. There it goes.

• 57:20Speaker 01

  Have you had that guy? I'm gonna look ridiculous doing this.

• 57:22Joe Rogan?

  No, you look like a man. I think more of you now.

• 57:25Speaker 01

  Thanks, man.

• 57:29Speaker 01

  Joe said I look like a man.

• 57:32Joe Rogan?

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• 58:38Joe Rogan?

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• 59:22Joe Rogan?

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• 59:38Speaker 01

  You know, I did not.

• 59:39Joe Rogan?

  Till I started use.

• 59:42Joe Rogan?

  Come on bitch, I think I have to fill it.

• 59:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, I only got a corner. Have you had that guy on who's trying to live forever, the vampire?

• 59:49Joe Rogan?

  No, I haven't.

• 59:49Speaker 01

  I, I'm really fascinated with that guy. I like what he's doing. He's trying.

• 59:53Joe Rogan?

  It's kind of interesting, but he's doing a bunch of stuff that I would say most experts believe is not the way to go. One of them is avoiding sunlight.

• 1:00:02Speaker 01

  Oh yeah.

• 1:00:02Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you're supposed to get sunlight. Like sunlight is important for your body. It's the best way your body produces vitamin D. It's great for your endorphins. Sunlight is good for you. This idea that you should be shielded from the sun because you're going to prevent skin cancer. That's, it's probably, I've talked to a dermatologist about this and they were explaining that if you don't have resilience from the sun, if you're not like used to going out in the sun, then you go out all in one burst and get sunburned. He's like, yeah, sunburn is not good for you. Yeah, he goes, you're damaging your skin. What you should do is get accustomed to being in the sun. So you don't get fucking sunburned and then be out in the sun. Don't get cooked. Don't spend the whole day out in the sun and get cooked.

• 1:00:45Joe Rogan?

  But being out in the sun is actually good for you. It's healthy for your body.

• 1:00:49Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:00:50Joe Rogan?

  That's just one thing. The other thing is the vegan thing. I get it if it's for ethical concern. You've got this idea in your mind that animal life is more important than plant life and you don't want to contribute to animal death. Okay, I understand that perspective, but not from a health perspective. From a health perspective, all the studies that show that, you know, meat causes this, it's all been debunked. And not only that, most of them are these epidemiology studies where they, they ask people like, how often do you eat meat? Is it two times a week, three times a week, four times a week? And the more people that ate meat, the more people you see diseases, more people you see problems, all these health consequences.

• 1:01:32Joe Rogan?

  And so they go, oh, meat correlates to these health consequences. What you don't ask them is how did you eat the meat? Is it a Jack in the Box burger with a fucking giant Coca-Cola? Did you have fries that were cooked in seed oil? Did you eat cake with it? What did you do? Do you smoke cigarettes? How often do you drink? Do you drink every night? Okay, like people that are more health conscious, especially if they haven't like read into it enough where they really understand what's nutrient dense and what, what causes problems with your health and what are the real issues with, you know, high sugar diets like, and, and. Those people, they hear meat is bad, so they say, you know what, I'm just gonna eat vegetarian.

• 1:02:14Joe Rogan?

  It seems like it's healthier. I'm just gonna eat lentils, they're good for you, they don't cause cancer. I read about the China diet. And so you start believing that. But that's not really true. And people have eaten meat since the, literally the beginning of time, and ninety-five percent of the planet eats meat. There's a bunch of things that likely contribute to all sorts of metabolic diseases that people have. I don't think regular meat is one of them. I don't think a grass-fed steak and a fucking salad is gonna kill you. I think the real issue is buns, and fries, and soda, and chips, and cookies. And the people that don't avoid eating meat, if they're not well-read about it, they're doing it because they don't give a fuck.

• 1:02:59Joe Rogan?

  I'm gonna eat a burger because I wanna eat a burger. You know, so you get a lot of that. So in the people that avoid meat, you get like a healthy user bias. Because these are people that, even if it's not correct, like I know people that truly believe that you can become a better athlete on a vegan diet. I'm like, okay, but there's no pros who have ever done that. No pros have ever gone vegan and been, especially at an explosive sport. There's only like a few people out there. Like, there's a guy named Martin Bocole. Do you know who he is?

• 1:03:26Speaker 01

  Of course, Martin Bocole from the Cincinnati Red Dogs.

• 1:03:30Joe Rogan?

  No, you're making it up. Martin Bocole is one of the best heavyweight boxers in the world. He's this fucking enormous guy. Um, I think he's, I don't remember what part of Africa he's from. He might be Congolese. Uh, he's a monster. And he's a vegetarian. Vegetarian, fucking people up. It's kind of crazy.

• 1:03:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:03:52Joe Rogan?

  Like, one of the best heavyweight boxers alive, huge guy, and he's a vegetarian. It's an aberration, though. And vegetarian, you can still eat eggs. Eggs are probably as good as anything. If you wanna eat like one protein, and, you know, simple, easy to digest, has everything. Eggs are pretty fucking solid.

• 1:04:09Speaker 01

  I eat eggs like every day. I, I actually tried to not eat meat for a little while, a few years ago, and I, you need like a nutritionist with you to really make sure you cover that.

• 1:04:17Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you gotta get all your vitamins correctly, and then you gotta make sure you're, you're not taking too many vitamins, and which ones are water soluble, which ones are fat soluble.

• 1:04:29Speaker 01

  I just caught myself in the camera here. I look ridiculous smoking a cigar.

• 1:04:33Joe Rogan?

  You look like a man.

• 1:04:34Speaker 01

  Thanks, Joe.

• 1:04:35Joe Rogan?

  I like you more this way.

• 1:04:36Speaker 01

  Great.

• 1:04:37Joe Rogan?

  Hide those things from people. You shouldn't be able to look at yourself. It's bad for you.

• 1:04:41Speaker 01

  I love it. I love that. Oh, Joe just turned the camera on.

• 1:04:46Joe Rogan?

  It's just like reading the comments. Don't do it.

• 1:04:49Speaker 01

  By the way, you know these youngins, these young kids. Oh, these young boys. Yeah, I was at one point where I-

• 1:04:58Joe Rogan?

  What about John Larkett? You ever gonna get to that?

• 1:05:00Speaker 01

  We'll get to it.

• 1:05:03Speaker 01

  Let's not rush that story. Let the podcast breathe for a second.

• 1:05:07Joe Rogan?

  Okay.

• 1:05:07Speaker 01

  And then we'll- so these young kids now, I noticed this, women will do this, they'll be like, people say, I light up the room. This woman told me this.

• 1:05:17Joe Rogan?

  Who ever says, people say, I light up the room, that actually lights up the room?

• 1:05:22Speaker 01

  That's what it sounds like. People say I'm funny. But I've noticed like the young people, they tell you compliments they got. And I'm like, why is this? Because for our areas, you never say like, I'm great. People think I'm great. You never would say that. But now, this is my theory, I don't know if this is true. They've grown up on Facebook where people say, you look so pretty. And then everyone sees the compliment. And now when they go out in the world and they get a compliment, then they're like, oh, I let people know my compliment. Everyone sees the compliments.

• 1:05:48Joe Rogan?

  That's probably exactly what it is. That's a very good theory. I think that's dead on.

• 1:05:52Speaker 01

  I'm writing a book about it.

• 1:05:53Joe Rogan?

  You should. Make sure you do the audio yourself.

• 1:05:55Speaker 01

  I have no merch. Yeah, I'm gonna definitely do the audio.

• 1:05:57Joe Rogan?

  You don't have any merch?

• 1:05:58Speaker 01

  No merch.

• 1:05:58Joe Rogan?

  You should have Caitlyn Jenner merch.

• 1:06:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, baby. Yeah, baby.

• 1:06:03Joe Rogan?

  That was when I knew Comedy Central was doomed. You and I were-

• 1:06:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, I sent you what they cut.

• 1:06:07Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, we were having a conversation. You showed it to me in the Comedy Store green room, in the green room in the main room. You were telling me the struggle you're going through.

• 1:06:17Speaker 01

  It was so stressful, that whole thing.

• 1:06:19Joe Rogan?

  Well, you had this show that you were doing on your own that was amazing. And it's one of those things like South Park, right? Where South Park really works because they can do outrageous shit because you know it's not real. Because they don't even look remotely human.

• 1:06:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, your brain knows.

• 1:06:35Joe Rogan?

  You, when you were doing the face swaps with like cellphone technology, you know, like-

• 1:06:42Joe Rogan?

  What everybody can use. It was obvious. So something funny about it being clearly not Bill Maher.

• 1:06:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:06:50Joe Rogan?

  It was clearly Kyle Donegan.

• 1:06:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:06:52Joe Rogan?

  It wasn't Kim Kardashian. It was Kyle Donegan. It was, you know, you would, it was the way you were doing it was super obvious. Then the Comedy Central thing came along like this. Like you get a beard.

• 1:07:06Speaker 01

  I mean, that looks ridiculous. I didn't need to have a beard.

• 1:07:09Joe Rogan?

  Start from the beginning.

• 1:07:10Speaker 01

  Wait, play a different episode, a different one. This one's terrible.

• 1:07:14Speaker 04

  Listen, no one's buying my book. So, uh, yeah, I thought I would read a excerpt to wet your whistle.

• 1:07:21Speaker 01

  All right, we can turn this off.

• 1:07:23Joe Rogan?

  Turn it off, you tortured him. If you want to put on a good one. If you want to put on a good one, put the good one where she, uh, what happened to her vagina? I forget what it was.

• 1:07:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:07:32Joe Rogan?

  But they were all talking about something happened and she's, she shoved a baby in her pussy.

• 1:07:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, that sounds like a bit I did.

• 1:07:41Speaker 04

  Your house burned down. Oh, it was awful, girls. For a minute there, I thought I was gonna suffer the same fate as my nutsack.

• 1:07:49Speaker 01

  Oh, jeez.

• 1:07:49Speaker 04

  Yeah, baby.

• 1:07:50Speaker 01

  I want to apologize to the trans men.

• 1:07:52Speaker 04

  Yeah, did you save all of your clothes? Yeah. Yeah. The first thing I did when I saw the flames was grab my Fendi clutch and my Alexander McQueen stiletto pumps. Yeah. And my, yeah. Yeah, then I ran back into the flames to get my Louis Vuitton alligator duffel. A bag so beautiful it demands attention. Yeah. My size 17 Jimmy Choo's and my dog Checkers. But there was only enough time to save two of those things, girls. Oh, no. The thick Sophie's Choice was that. What did you choose?

• 1:08:23Speaker 01

  This is what I do with my time?

• 1:08:25Speaker 04

  Oh, Checkers is fucking dead.

• 1:08:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, Checkers is dead.

• 1:08:28Speaker 04

  I think I shot my old balls and stick to play with up in heaven, baby.

• 1:08:31Speaker 01

  Oh, baby. That's what I'm doing with my time. That's an old one. That's an oldie.

• 1:08:36Joe Rogan?

  But the fact that that's obvious made it better. When they did it on Comedy Central, they used higher level technology. And it was kind of weird.

• 1:08:44Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm, it's creepy. It has that, uh, what is that, uh?

• 1:08:47Joe Rogan?

  Uncanny Valley.

• 1:08:48Speaker 01

  Uncanny Valley. Uncanny Valley, yeah, your brain needs to know it's a joke.

• 1:08:52Joe Rogan?

  Like obvious, like that's an obvious joke. Like no one's gonna look at that and go, what did Caitlyn Jenner say? Now you look at that and you go, what is this? What the fuck is? Like that's part of the fun of it is it doesn't look real.

• 1:09:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's completely ridiculous. I didn't mean to have a beard. That was just, I was being lazy. I was like trying to make a joke.

• 1:09:12Speaker 01

  By the way, I never did it. I did impressions when I was younger. When I was like in middle school, I would do them. And then I never, I started doing, like a manager was like, "Don't do impressions." And then that Face app came along and I looked nothing like Trump. Though the first one I was doing was Trump.

• 1:09:28Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:29Speaker 01

  Cause I did Trump like years ago. And I was like, "Oh, I can do Trump because my face like is the opposite of Trump."

• 1:09:35Joe Rogan?

  Stormy!

• 1:09:36Speaker 01

  Stormy, Stormy. It's funny, I have the worst Trump. Like I did Trump first and it's the worst one. Now everyone does a better Trump.

• 1:09:44Joe Rogan?

  It was fun though. It was a ridiculous character though. But it's like, that's how I knew Comedy Central was doomed. I'm like, "If you guys are fucking this up, like this show is giving to get to you on a silver platter. Just get out of the way. All you had to do is get out of the way. You were working with Metzger, right?"

• 1:10:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, not at that moment. Yeah.

• 1:10:03Joe Rogan?

  Eventually.

• 1:10:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, eventually.

• 1:10:04Joe Rogan?

  They're like, "All you had to do is get out of the way. Just get out of the way, point a camera at it, let him, tell him you're supporting him."

• 1:10:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, eventually there was a show, yeah, I was doing like full on, because that was like, I was just kinda doing little videos. And then it became like, I was crafting, you know, we would do, you were in one of them, Time Cancellor. Like we had like crafted episodes where-

• 1:10:26Joe Rogan?

  What did we do in that one?

• 1:10:27Speaker 01

  You played Becky, the nurse.

• 1:10:31Speaker 01

  Where's Time Cancellor? Just to show Joe, I don't think you remember those. You probably don't remember, but Time Cancellor was like a full episode where, yeah, no one, no one ever was like, "Hey, we can make this." And it wasn't dirty and it was like, got a lot of views and I, I never, Hollywood never was, they were always like, "No, thank you."

• 1:10:49Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, they couldn't figure out-

• 1:10:52Speaker 01

  It is weird, and it is weird.

• 1:10:55Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's just, it's this weird marriage of comedy, creative people, and then business people, executives. That's the weird marriage. And they, they, because they've had a few hit shows before, or you know, we're producing South Park, we're- Like, "But you don't make it. You can't make it yourself." Like, so you have this idea in your head that you're a part of the process of, and you could choose, you've got an eye for creativity. Oh, that's right.

• 1:11:25Speaker 01

  Nurse Becky. You're really good in that.

• 1:11:29Joe Rogan?

  Thank you.

• 1:11:29Speaker 01

  I don't, do you, do you come up to that on stage?

• 1:11:33Joe Rogan?

  To Nurse Becky?

• 1:11:33Speaker 01

  Joe Rogan from the Time Councillor?

• 1:11:36Joe Rogan?

  Well, a lot of people like to bring it up at the airport.

• 1:11:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:11:38Joe Rogan?

  Comes up there a lot.

• 1:11:38Speaker 01

  Do you, do you have any, like, I, I don't wanna be seen, you just like people coming up to you? How do you feel about that?

• 1:11:45Joe Rogan?

  Most people are nice. It's just people being nice. Most people. There's a vast majority of people that just wanna say hi. You, they like what you do, and it's nice.

• 1:11:55Speaker 01

  You know, because of you, um, a lot of dudes come into my show, which is great.

• 1:12:01Joe Rogan?

  Was it mostly girls before?

• 1:12:03Speaker 01

  It was mostly nobody. It was mostly neither people were coming to my shows. But now, it's great. People are coming to my shows. But it is like a sea of dudes, like, no, I did a tour and I was, I started to count, like, are any girls coming to my show? And the only ones would come, would be like, my boyfriend likes you. It's something like that, like, and, uh, yeah, I, I saw thousands of people. I didn't see, there was never, like, three girls came to see me or somebody. It might be like one autistic girl.

• 1:12:35Speaker 01

  No ladies.

• 1:12:36Joe Rogan?

  Who likes to hear you say, "Yeah, baby."

• 1:12:38Speaker 01

  Yeah, baby! Yeah!

• 1:12:41Joe Rogan?

  Wait till this Netflix episode of Kill Tony comes out.

• 1:12:45Speaker 01

  Oh my god, the wildest show. That show is like a fever dream.

• 1:12:49Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 1:12:49Speaker 01

  It's like nothing else is gonna be on Netflix like that.

• 1:12:53Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:12:54Speaker 01

  It was so fun.

• 1:12:54Joe Rogan?

  We can't give anything away, because it doesn't come out until Monday, so we don't wanna give anything away.

• 1:12:58Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 1:12:59Joe Rogan?

  But holy shit, was it funny.

• 1:13:01Speaker 01

  I love, Tony's like, I like when comedians do well, cuz it's so much pressure. Can you imagine the pressure of these comedians?

• 1:13:08Joe Rogan?

  Oh, god.

• 1:13:08Speaker 01

  It's like, could change their, and there's nothing, you know, when you're young, you don't even know how to make it in show business. And there's just like one show they can, this was a direct link, so it's like, must be so much pressure.

• 1:13:19Joe Rogan?

  But it also works. Like, there's guys that have gone from that show that have real careers now.

• 1:13:23Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 1:13:24Joe Rogan?

  Guys like Cam Patterson, William Montgomery, these guys are going on the road, they're selling out all over the place.

• 1:13:28Speaker 01

  Oh yeah, people love them.

• 1:13:29Joe Rogan?

  David Lucas, I mean, it's kind of incredible. The fanbase is rabid.

• 1:13:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, he's made a lot of, like, careers.

• 1:13:36Joe Rogan?

  They're selling out arenas this weekend in Nashville.

• 1:13:38Speaker 01

  I know. They have like the comedy baton right now. The, the funny thing is, when, when someone doesn't do well, and it's like dead silent, this makes me laugh, and Tony will go, "Holy shit."

• 1:13:50Joe Rogan?

  Tony's the worst. He's so mean.

• 1:13:53Speaker 01

  He's like, holy shit. He's so good at roasting. Oh, my God.

• 1:13:57Joe Rogan?

  He's the best at it. There's no one close. He's the best roaster ever.

• 1:14:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, he's unbelievably quick.

• 1:14:02Joe Rogan?

  On that Tom Brady roast, he was a fucking savage. Holy shit. Yeah. That Tom Brady roast was so important to comedy because it was the most watched thing ever in Netflix and it was the most unwoke thing that's ever been on television.

• 1:14:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:14:17Joe Rogan?

  So it was like, it broke the dam.

• 1:14:18Speaker 01

  And Nikki Glaser was really funny. Yeah, I loved it.

• 1:14:21Joe Rogan?

  Very funny.

• 1:14:21Speaker 01

  Really funny.

• 1:14:22Joe Rogan?

  Jeff Ross was great on it. Schultz killed on it. It was great. Schultz. Having something like that was a big moment, you know, like something that's just, just funny. Like fuck all these stupid rules. We're talking shit. This is just talking shit. Everybody loves it.

• 1:14:37Speaker 01

  I think it seems like it's done. It seems like everything's done.

• 1:14:40Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's not done with some people. They're triple masking right now as they're listening to this. I can't believe this.

• 1:14:45Speaker 01

  They're not listening to this.

• 1:14:46Joe Rogan?

  They got a tie dye mask on the outside. They're kicking a Tesla on their way to the garage.

• 1:14:50Speaker 01

  I know a comedian who still goes on stage with them.

• 1:14:52Joe Rogan?

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• 1:15:34Joe Rogan?

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• 1:16:19Joe Rogan?

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• 1:16:56Speaker 01

  Mask and has it the whole time and comes in the whole time. I won't say.

• 1:17:00Joe Rogan?

  Puts it on when he's talking into the microphone?

• 1:17:03Speaker 01

  Comes in, maybe he takes it off. Nah, yeah, I think he takes it off for the thing.

• 1:17:10Joe Rogan?

  People were doing comedy through masks.

• 1:17:13Speaker 01

  Very funny.

• 1:17:14Joe Rogan?

  That's one of the dumbest fucking things of all time.

• 1:17:18Speaker 01

  You know what? Maybe he has like an immune disease. I don't know, maybe there's a reason.

• 1:17:21Joe Rogan?

  Stay home. It doesn't matter. It's not helping you. You're breathing into this fucking cloth that's an inch from your face and bacteria is gonna accumulate there and moisture. And it's probably gonna be worse for you.

• 1:17:32Speaker 01

  Don't you hate it when you're like, you're doing stand-up and like accidentally like mouth it? Like that?

• 1:17:37Joe Rogan?

  And think of all the people.

• 1:17:37Speaker 01

  There's been 15 comedians before you. And comedians are disgusting, let's be honest. We're all a disgusting group of people. And you're just like, ah, okay, gotta just wait for this disease.

• 1:17:48Joe Rogan?

  Wait for whatever. Yeah, if someone's got a cold, we all have a cold. That's one thing. You're sharing the microphone with somebody who has the flu?

• 1:17:55Speaker 01

  I know a girl who brings her own microphone. Swear to God. The stand.

• 1:17:59Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 1:18:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:18:01Joe Rogan?

  Doesn't Eliza do that too?

• 1:18:02Speaker 01

  I don't know. How's she doing? Haven't her?

• 1:18:05Joe Rogan?

  I think she just released a special.

• 1:18:06Speaker 01

  You ever see her movie? That's like weird, cuz it's like some of it's funny, then all of a sudden it's serious? And you're like, is it?

• 1:18:12Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 1:18:12Speaker 01

  It goes back and forth from mixed genres, they call it.

• 1:18:16Joe Rogan?

  You know what she's on that I love? Righteous Gemstones?

• 1:18:18Speaker 01

  Righteous Gemstones?

• 1:18:22Speaker 01

  You know what else? Edie Patterson, I love her. I was in the Groundlings with her. We would do sketches. Edie is like the daughter or something, but she's so funny. She's just weird and funny.

• 1:18:33Joe Rogan?

  It's a weird show. It's a funny show, man. Like, like, I can't believe nobody told me to watch it. Maybe they didn't.

• 1:18:39Speaker 01

  There's too many shows. I have a thing where I'm like, don't, can you just not tell me another good show?

• 1:18:42Joe Rogan?

  Too many shows.

• 1:18:43Speaker 01

  I'm not caught up. The Baldwins, you watching that?

• 1:18:45Joe Rogan?

  No. Was it a sitcom?

• 1:18:47Speaker 01

  It's a reality show, but Alec Baldwin and his terrible wife.

• 1:18:50Joe Rogan?

  Why would you want?

• 1:18:51Speaker 01

  She's an awful, because I watch what women watch, that's what I enjoy.

• 1:18:54Joe Rogan?

  Does she fake the accent? I'll watch it if she fakes the accent.

• 1:18:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, she fakes, she's a-

• 1:18:58Joe Rogan?

  Does she?

• 1:18:59Speaker 01

  She is-

• 1:19:00Joe Rogan?

  She pretends she doesn't understand the words?

• 1:19:02Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:19:03Joe Rogan?

  The, what is, how do you say in English?

• 1:19:04Speaker 01

  How to say cucumber? Cucumber?

• 1:19:08Speaker 01

  And he goes along with, but he, do you have that, her shushing him at like a red carpet?

• 1:19:13Joe Rogan?

  I saw it.

• 1:19:14Speaker 01

  Isn't it just awful?

• 1:19:15Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I'm talking. You're not talking when I'm talking.

• 1:19:17Speaker 01

  I'm talking, you don't talking when I talk talking. He, Alec Baldwin can get like a really sweet, beautiful woman. He's, Alec Baldwin, what happened?

• 1:19:24Joe Rogan?

  He would yell, they would run away.

• 1:19:26Speaker 01

  He would yell? What do you mean, he would yell?

• 1:19:29Joe Rogan?

  He would yell at them, they'd run away. Who knows? Who knows what these two are like? They're both, they're out of their fucking minds.

• 1:19:36Speaker 01

  And I'm sure it's edited, but he comes off way better than her on that show.

• 1:19:39Joe Rogan?

  Maybe he's doing that on purpose. Maybe that's a clever move. Let her say crazy shit, don't check her, let her come off looking like a nut. Maybe they planned it. Maybe they have a wonderful relationship and they said, listen, this is not going to sell.

• 1:19:52Speaker 01

  She humiliated him. Maybe you're right, it'd go viral.

• 1:19:54Joe Rogan?

  Listen, you, you were going to shut me up and I'm not even going to comment on it. Plus, I just killed a lady. So.

• 1:20:00Speaker 01

  It does make you forget about when he killed that lady a little bit.

• 1:20:03Joe Rogan?

  It's a good way to make you forget.

• 1:20:04Speaker 01

  The show.

• 1:20:05Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. The other good way is you change your gender.

• 1:20:08Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:20:09Joe Rogan?

  That's another good way.

• 1:20:10Speaker 01

  I mean, I, Bruce killed that lady with a car, right? I mean, how was Bruce? Yeah.

• 1:20:15Joe Rogan?

  Just Bruce.

• 1:20:16Speaker 01

  That was like right after that. Have you ever seen the footage of the car, the reenactment? Like, she was putting on lipstick or something. She was very distracted. What did I say about Alec Baldwin? Hold on, there's one other thing I could say about that.

• 1:20:27Joe Rogan?

  No, he was. You said she. You shouldn't say she. You should say-

• 1:20:30Speaker 01

  What did I say?

• 1:20:30Joe Rogan?

  You said she was. Please correct yourself. That was back when she was Bruce.

• 1:20:34Speaker 01

  She, she was him.

• 1:20:36Joe Rogan?

  Was she always Bruce? What does it say in the, in the Olympics?

• 1:20:38Speaker 01

  Dead name. What?

• 1:20:39Joe Rogan?

  Can you dead name in the Olympics? Is that allowed? Dead naming kind of went away, huh?

• 1:20:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:20:45Joe Rogan?

  That didn't work. People like, wait, you can't, you can't kick people out of the social square for life because they won't accept this bizarre new thing you're doing. There it is. Bruce Jenner. Still says Bruce. Wow, look how jacked he was.

• 1:20:58Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:20:59Joe Rogan?

  Back then, it was he.

• 1:21:00Speaker 01

  There's that nut. You can see the nut shack, yeah.

• 1:21:02Joe Rogan?

  Nah.

• 1:21:05Joe Rogan?

  Did he, um, have the?

• 1:21:07Speaker 01

  I think, I have no information, but I think so.

• 1:21:10Joe Rogan?

  You're holding back. Do you work for the government?

• 1:21:12Speaker 01

  Eh, I know a guy.

• 1:21:14Joe Rogan?

  I'll tell Trump to release the files.

• 1:21:15Speaker 01

  So terrifically. Terrific guy.

• 1:21:19Joe Rogan?

  Are we getting new files, Jamie? Does anything happen?

• 1:21:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, what happened with?

• 1:21:22Joe Rogan?

  Oliver Stone apparently testified about the JFK assassination.

• 1:21:26Speaker 01

  What does he know? How does he know?

• 1:21:27Joe Rogan?

  He knows everything about it.

• 1:21:28Speaker 01

  How does he know?

• 1:21:29Joe Rogan?

  He's a, literally a warehouse of information on the JFK assassination before the podcast, during the podcast, after the podcast. He wouldn't stop talking about it.

• 1:21:38Speaker 01

  Is it Terrence Howard information?

• 1:21:40Joe Rogan?

  No, no, it's Oliver Stone. He's a brilliant guy. Oliver Stone can give you, he, he could sit down and break down from, just from recall. And how old is Oliver Stone?

• 1:21:53Joe Rogan?

  Like, complete recall of dates, times, who was involved, who they worked for before this happened, who Kennedy had fired, why they were on the Warren Commission report, what the Warren Commission report's objectives were, who was influencing it, who saw the, the gunshots in the grass, you know, how did they die in mysterious circumstances?

• 1:22:16Speaker 01

  And he's like?

• 1:22:17Joe Rogan?

  Rattle it all off, off the top of his head.

• 1:22:19Speaker 01

  And he's like, um?

• 1:22:21Joe Rogan?

  He tells Congress to reinvestigate the 1963 assassination, starting at the scene of the crime. Like, I'm telling you, man, the movie he did is, you know, great movie, Kevin Costner, wonderful movie, but talking to him about it is where you really freak out. Like, this guy has been studying the JFK assassination forever.

• 1:22:41Speaker 01

  And he thinks it was a CIA or head of?

• 1:22:43Joe Rogan?

  You know, no one knows and until you get all these files, no one's going to know. And even once you get all these files, what is it gonna, how, you're still gonna connect dots. And it's not like there's a page, page 24, Mike did it. Oh, fucking Mike. Yeah, Mike was in the grassy knoll. I told him, shoot that Irish cocksucker. He's gonna rob us. No, there's none of that. You're, you're gonna get certain details that weren't available before for national security reasons or for whatever, but if they had made some sort of a declaration that Kennedy was a problem that needed to be removed, that would be like the, as close to a smoking gun as you would get. But they could probably get away with saying things like that in 1963, you know, especially like,

• 1:23:30Joe Rogan?

  people that worked at, they were doing nutty shit in 63, like really nutty shit. Like that's the year, the same year as Operation Northwoods. Right? That's the same year. Operation Northwoods was this crazy idea that was drummed up. It was a false flag idea that was drummed up and literally signed by the Joint Chiefs of Staff. Like they, they gave this a green light and then vetoed by Kennedy. And what they were gonna do is they're gonna have a bunch of false flag attacks. Like they were gonna blow up a jetliner and they were gonna blame it on Cuba. And they were gonna arm Cuban friendlies and bomb Guantanamo Bay. They were gonna literally kill American citizens. And the idea was do this false flag, blame it on Cuba, then we have to go to war with Cuba.

• 1:24:16Joe Rogan?

  And Kennedy was like, what the fuck are you doing? No. And then there was the other one, which was the Bay of Pigs. So they informed Kennedy about the Bay of Pigs. Apparently they have informed him about it like late in the process. And he denied them air support. So the whole plan of invading Cuba, the Bay, Bay of Pigs was dependent upon air support. They didn't get air support because Kennedy said no to it. So all these people died that didn't have to die. All these American soldiers died that didn't have to die. And my friend Evan Hafer from Black Rifle Coffee, he had a very good point. He said like, if you wanted to look at someone who had a bone to pick, was like a hardened killer. Like those guys who got stranded at that beach, those would be the kind of guys that would want to kill Kennedy.

• 1:25:01Joe Rogan?

  Like, there's probably a lot of people that wanted to kill Kennedy. You know, there's probably the mob wanted to kill him because they got, the mob got him in. You know, the whole thing that happened with Illinois, like him winning Illinois.

• 1:25:15Speaker 01

  Right, right, yeah.

• 1:25:15Joe Rogan?

  Very shaky stuff, right?

• 1:25:17Speaker 01

  Very shaky election.

• 1:25:19Joe Rogan?

  So the mob got him in, and then his brother starts going after the mob.

• 1:25:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:25:23Joe Rogan?

  Like, hey, fuckface, like, what kind of deal is this?

• 1:25:26Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:25:27Joe Rogan?

  And then you've got, he's trying to get rid of the CIA, he wants to get rid of, uh, all these, like, he gives that speech about, uh, privacy, about having these private groups, and having secrecy and secret societies. Have you ever seen that speech about secret societies?

• 1:25:46Speaker 01

  That Kennedy made?

• 1:25:47Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:47Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:25:48Joe Rogan?

  It's really creepy. He's talking, calling, talking about how secret societies are repugnant. And that, he's essentially calling out the shadow government. He's calling out all these people that are involved, these organizations, literally from like Yale, like the Skull and Bones that they're all in. All these creepy frat boys, join the Skull and Bones, then one day they wind up ruling the world. Like, it's kind of Harry Potter-ish. It's bizarrely, you know, on the nose, as far as what it is, but he was calling that stuff out in the 60s as well, and then they kill him. And then you don't hear a peep about any of that stuff anymore.

• 1:26:25Speaker 01

  And we will get to the John Lehrer cat story, just anybody listening.

• 1:26:28Joe Rogan?

  Let's listen to Kennedy talk about secret societies.

• 1:26:31Speaker 01

  I want to see that, yeah.

• 1:26:31Joe Rogan?

  Secret societies.

• 1:26:33Speaker 01

  There are secret societies.

• 1:26:35Joe Rogan?

  It's a, it's a very creepy speech when you think about the fact that they killed him, like, less than a year later, I believe.

• 1:26:42Speaker 01

  What about the back and the left? This is what I heard, I don't know any information. But in Oliver Stone, he was like, back and to the left. Back and, but someone's saying, no, your head would go, would do that because it like, from the, shot from the back, your head would like recoil back. I don't know anything.

• 1:27:00Joe Rogan?

  Well, we could look at that too. Let's hear it.

• 1:27:04Joe Rogan?

  The speech that killed him about secret societies.

• 1:27:08Speaker 06

  The very word secrecy is repugnant in a free and open society. And we are, as a people, inherently and historically opposed to secret societies, to secret oaths, and to secret proceedings. We decided long ago that the dangers of excessive and unwarranted concealment of pertinent facts far outweighed the dangers which are cited to justify it. Even today, there is little value in opposing the threat of a closed society by imitating its arbitrary restrictions. Even today, there is little value in ensuring the survival of our nation if our traditions

• 1:27:52Speaker 06

  do not survive with it. And there is very grave danger that an announced need for increased security will be seized upon by those anxious to expand its meaning to the very limits of official censorship and concealment. That I do not intend to permit to the extent that it's in my control. And no official of my administration, whether his rank is high or low, civilian or military, should interpret my words here tonight as an excuse to censor the news, to stifle dissent, to cover up our mistakes, or to withhold from the press and the public the facts they deserve to know.

• 1:28:36Speaker 06

  For we are opposed around the world by a monolithic and ruthless conspiracy that relies primarily on covert means for expanding its sphere of influence, on infiltration instead of invasion, on subversion instead of elections, on intimidation instead of free choice, on guerrillas by night instead of armies by day. It is a system which has conscripted vast human and material resources into the building of a tightly knit, highly efficient machine that combines military, diplomatic, intelligence, economic, scientific, and political operations.

• 1:29:21Speaker 06

  Its preparations are concealed, not published. Its mistakes are buried, not headlined. Its dissenters are silenced, not praised. No expenditure is questioned, no rumor is printed, no secret is revealed.

• 1:29:38Speaker 06

  No president should fear public scrutiny of his program. For from that scrutiny comes understanding. And from that understanding comes support or opposition. And both are necessary.

• 1:29:50Joe Rogan?

  Why did, why did we become so retarded? Like, listen to how genius what he's saying is and how eloquently he's describing the problem.

• 1:30:01Speaker 01

  People don't talk like that anymore.

• 1:30:02Joe Rogan?

  No, we don't talk like that anymore. And if we did talk like that, people would be like, what did he just say?

• 1:30:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, I didn't understand a word.

• 1:30:07Joe Rogan?

  I understood half of those words. This is 1963, we're dumber now.

• 1:30:12Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:30:13Joe Rogan?

  With more access to information than we were in 63.

• 1:30:17Speaker 01

  And people think they're smarter because their phone, they think that's them too.

• 1:30:20Joe Rogan?

  Chat GPT is like.

• 1:30:23Speaker 01

  Oh, I tried Grok too, and it was really cool. I kind of felt like, I don't know. You could just see liking your AI friend.

• 1:30:32Joe Rogan?

  That's a problem with people. Grok is saying some wild shit to folks.

• 1:30:36Speaker 01

  Oh, I know they have that different kind of stuff.

• 1:30:38Joe Rogan?

  Well, if you also, if you ask Grok, if you were like purely evil and you wanted to destroy society, would you do, how would you do it? And Grok essentially describes everything that's happening in society.

• 1:30:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's like Idiocracy, you know that movie?

• 1:30:54Joe Rogan?

  Idiocracy, yeah.

• 1:30:55Speaker 01

  Idiocracy, yeah, it's happening. I definitely feel like.

• 1:30:58Joe Rogan?

  Idiocracy like was very charitable in terms of like their version of the future in comparison to what we're experiencing. Yes. Because they didn't figure in cellphone addiction.

• 1:31:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, you know what makes me laugh is when you look at like a 70s movie about the future? And like what they got right and wrong. First of all, we don't do the FaceTime as much as they thought we were gonna just do it all the time. We're like, no, we don't want that. Another funny thing is like the back of TVs are like TVs are never gonna have rid of the back. They're gonna have flying cars, but where do you put the stuff?

• 1:31:29Joe Rogan?

  Like, no one. It's always gonna be a big box.

• 1:31:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:31:32Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:31:32Speaker 01

  And they're like, oh, there's no more racism in the future.

• 1:31:35Joe Rogan?

  And you have flying cars. Where's the flying cars?

• 1:31:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, no flying cars, no ba.

• 1:31:38Joe Rogan?

  No racism, there's no black people. Watch The Jetsons. They don't have a single black person.

• 1:31:43Speaker 01

  Oh, that's true. Yeah, yeah.

• 1:31:44Joe Rogan?

  That's, that was our show. Neat George Jetson.

• 1:31:48Joe Rogan?

  And then they'd be flying around, your flying car.

• 1:31:51Speaker 01

  What year was that supposed to be? Did they say like this is 2012?

• 1:31:54Joe Rogan?

  Let's take a guess. What is it?

• 1:31:56Speaker 03

  I'll wait. Sorry.

• 1:31:57Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 1:31:58Speaker 01

  My cigar keeps going out. Is that a sign of manlyhood?

• 1:32:02Speaker 03

  It came out 2006.

• 1:32:03Joe Rogan?

  It's like Olympic.

• 1:32:03Speaker 03

  I shouldn't be like doing this all.

• 1:32:06Joe Rogan?

  2006? What? No.

• 1:32:08Speaker 03

  That's when it came out. That's when the movie was released.

• 1:32:10Speaker 01

  No, I mean like when the Jetsons.

• 1:32:11Joe Rogan?

  No, not Idiocracy, the Jetsons. What year is the Jetsons supposed to be? Idiocracy was supposed to be 2020 what?

• 1:32:17Speaker 03

  2505.

• 1:32:19Joe Rogan?

  Oh, 2000. That's probably, again, very charitable.

• 1:32:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, and by the way.

• 1:32:23Joe Rogan?

  We could have a pro wrestling president right now, by the way.

• 1:32:26Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:32:27Joe Rogan?

  The Rock, you know.

• 1:32:28Speaker 01

  I like that guy.

• 1:32:29Joe Rogan?

  Are we allowed to say that? I think they wanted The Rock to run.

• 1:32:32Speaker 01

  Rock, Rock could win. I went to the gym.

• 1:32:35Joe Rogan?

  He did, right? Yeah.

• 1:32:36Speaker 01

  I went to the gym with The Rock when I was in LA. Not a brag, I'm just telling you the facts. We went to the same gym.

• 1:32:41Joe Rogan?

  Did you guys get punked?

• 1:32:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, we got like, this was before he was like really famous, but there was this like restaurant nearby and I was there and he got a stack of like 10 burgers. That's all he ate. And I was like, who's that fucking guy? He was just wrestling back then.

• 1:32:56Joe Rogan?

  He could be the president.

• 1:32:56Speaker 01

  He couldn't do the lift the weight I was doing though. He went to the machine and he had to go down. It was kind of humiliating.

• 1:33:02Speaker 03

  I found a year for the Jetsons.

• 1:33:03Joe Rogan?

  Okay, let's guess.

• 1:33:04Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:33:05Joe Rogan?

  I want to say 1998. 1999. I'm gonna say 1999.

• 1:33:09Speaker 01

  No way!

• 1:33:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:33:12Speaker 03

  For reference to it came out, 1962 was the debut.

• 1:33:15Speaker 01

  2000, 2000, this year, 2025.

• 1:33:19Joe Rogan?

  1999. What is it?

• 1:33:20Speaker 03

  Well, it is apparently 100 years into the future, so 2062.

• 1:33:25Joe Rogan?

  Oh, okay.

• 1:33:26Speaker 01

  Not gonna happen though. None of.

• 1:33:28Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 1:33:28Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:33:28Joe Rogan?

  They didn't figure out phones. That's, even Star Trek didn't figure out cell phones. It was like, there was a walkie talkie. Kirk out. He had to like shut his little walkie talkie off.

• 1:33:37Speaker 01

  They did it? Yeah, Kirk didn't have any hats.

• 1:33:40Joe Rogan?

  Oh, did you see this fucking warp drive thing? That they-

• 1:33:44Speaker 01

  No, but I love space and all this stuff, so I want to see this.

• 1:33:47Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, somebody, uh, sent me that. This is very, very strange. Um-

• 1:33:51Speaker 01

  I took physics in college, not to brag, but just telling you guys-

• 1:33:54Joe Rogan?

  I bet you did, dude.

• 1:33:55Speaker 01

  I, I, you know-

• 1:33:56Joe Rogan?

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• 1:34:40Joe Rogan?

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• 1:35:25Joe Rogan?

  They provide top-notch security, protect your home, your family, even your dog. I get how important it is to feel like your pets are safe at home alone, especially as you get roped into all the holiday madness. And the reason I say it's top-notch is because SimpliSafe's security system protect your house 24/7 with agents that can inter-

• 1:35:47Joe Rogan?

  And less than 30 seconds. That early intervention is crucial in these situations. I've also partnered with Simply Safe to offer my listeners the biggest savings of the year. 70% off your new system with professional monitoring when you visit simplysafe.com/rogan. That's simplysafe.com/rogan. And write in the Joe Rogan Experience at checkout. That really helps the show. Simply Safe, ahead of crime, in real time.

• 1:36:17Speaker 01

  I never thought of doing something else, but I love other things. And for some reason, I just was like in taking acting classes.

• 1:36:26Joe Rogan?

  Um, what did you like about physics?

• 1:36:29Speaker 01

  I always, um, love like out, like outer space and just science stuff. I just always have like an interest in it. And in school, I was very, I didn't score well, but like physics I did well because it was like, um, wasn't a lot of reading, wasn't dense reading.

• 1:36:49Joe Rogan?

  What is the problem with you and reading?

• 1:36:51Speaker 01

  Well, I never got tested, but I did take Spanish and she goes, all your, you write all your Bs and Ds backwards. So I'm assuming I have dyslexia.

• 1:37:00Joe Rogan?

  How old were you though?

• 1:37:01Speaker 01

  I was in high school, but I always read so like my parents were cool. They'd send me to read, speed reading classes. They weren't, back then, in my day, they weren't like, you have a reading disorder. They were like, you just need, you're dumb and you need to read faster.

• 1:37:13Joe Rogan?

  You suck.

• 1:37:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, there was no test.

• 1:37:16Joe Rogan?

  What is, so dyslexia is like you see things backwards? Is that what it is?

• 1:37:20Speaker 01

  It's sort of like you flip things. So I actually put a dyslexia app on my computer and it's sort of like makes the font. So I don't flip the like, you know.

• 1:37:31Joe Rogan?

  So you do have dyslexia?

• 1:37:32Speaker 01

  I, I never was tested, but this app, I, I, I read much faster with it. So I'm assuming I do.

• 1:37:38Joe Rogan?

  I took the medicine, it got better, so I assume I had it.

• 1:37:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's kind of what it was.

• 1:37:43Joe Rogan?

  Jamie, I sent you that warp drive thing.

• 1:37:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, uh, I was trying to pull that. I don't like labels, Joe. I don't want to label myself with a disease. I can read.

• 1:37:52Joe Rogan?

  DARPA funded researchers accidentally discover the words world's first warp bubble.

• 1:37:58Joe Rogan?

  Warp drive pioneer and former NASA warp drive specialist Dr. Harold G. Sonny White has reported the discovery of an actual real world warp bubble. And according to White, the first of its kind breakthrough by Limitless Space Institute's team sets up a new starting point for those trying to manufacture a full sized warp capable spacecraft. They added, "Our detailed numerical analysis of our custom casimir cavities," I don't know what that means, "helped us identify a real and manufacturable nano-micro structure that is predicted to generate a negative vacuum energy density that, such that it

• 1:38:39Joe Rogan?

  would manifest a real nanoscale warp bubble, but not an analog, but the real thing." In other words, a warp bubble structure will manifest under these specific conditions. White cautioned that this does not mean we are building a fully functioning warp drive, as much more science needs to be done.

• 1:38:57Speaker 03

  Alright, so if this was 2021, when I Googled to find it to try to see what you were talking about, I found this article, it just came out three days ago.

• 1:39:04Joe Rogan?

  Oh, three days ago.

• 1:39:06Speaker 03

  It's about an email, though, but...

• 1:39:08Joe Rogan?

  Warp Drive Think Tank Adds Harvard Astrophysicists and Warp Theorists to Advance Planetary Defense.

• 1:39:14Speaker 03

  We're talking about warp drives in asteroid collection or something or other.

• 1:39:18Joe Rogan?

  So they're gonna throw a warp drive around an asteroid to keep it from killing us?

• 1:39:21Speaker 03

  I don't know, yeah.

• 1:39:23Joe Rogan?

  Could have profound effects on planetary defense, advanced propulsion, and warp drive detection. Maybe that's where our asteroids are coming from. Someone like shot an asteroid, like, you know, like something's coming at their car, they whacked it out of the window and it hit your car?

• 1:39:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:39:38Joe Rogan?

  You know what I mean?

• 1:39:39Speaker 01

  That's what's happening, we got the asteroid belt.

• 1:39:41Joe Rogan?

  Smack that bird and it went into your window?

• 1:39:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. That's what's happening in outer space, basically.

• 1:39:47Joe Rogan?

  I wonder if that's what's happening. I wonder if like they see an asteroid coming, they just throw a warp bubble at it and it just appears somewhere else. Not my problem.

• 1:39:53Speaker 03

  That'd be cool.

• 1:39:54Joe Rogan?

  It just shows up.

• 1:39:55Speaker 03

  Jupiter saves us from all our little strikes.

• 1:39:57Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:39:59Speaker 03

  We do have like a perfect setup, but then...

• 1:40:02Joe Rogan?

  Okay, so this is no coincidence. We are working on something historic. When pushed for a timeline and list of goals for the team's newest project. Mar- my- Marter? Martir? Martir? How do you think you say that? M A R T I R E?

• 1:40:17Speaker 01

  Merterrer.

• 1:40:18Joe Rogan?

  Merterrer. It said, "Yes, they exist, but we can't disclose those details at this time." He said, "Seemingly boundless passion, practically coming through in print. You'll understand why, once I'm able to show you. It's rad." Applied Physics go- Applied Physics is currently hiring? Okay. They won't tell you what it is, but um...

• 1:40:41Speaker 01

  Great.

• 1:40:42Joe Rogan?

  So, I- this is what I've been thinking a lot of these fucking UAP things are.

• 1:40:47Speaker 01

  Yes, I want to know what you think.

• 1:40:49Joe Rogan?

  That's what I think. I think some of it has got to be ours. And I think if I had some shit that I did want the general public to know that I had, and I wanted to protect it from like espionage, didn't want enemies to find out about it, I would say it's not mine. I'd say it's coming from outer space. It's uh, it's not of this world.

• 1:41:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:41:07Joe Rogan?

  Hey guys, not of this world.

• 1:41:08Speaker 03

  There was an article standing there in the- a race to build the world's first working warp drive.

• 1:41:11Joe Rogan?

  Jesus. Warp theorists say we've entered an exotic propulsion space race. To build the world's first working warp drive. All this is happening while AI is becoming sentient. Did you hear that? AI passed the Turing test?

• 1:41:26Speaker 01

  It- is this recently?

• 1:41:27Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it was an article from yesterday. AI passes Turing test for the first time.

• 1:41:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, it learns like exponential. People think it's, it's happening so fast.

• 1:41:37Joe Rogan?

  You know what the Turing test is?

• 1:41:38Speaker 01

  Yeah, to see if it can be passed as a human.

• 1:41:41Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, if you, if it passes as a human to, to everyone.

• 1:41:44Speaker 01

  I don't think I could pass the Turing test.

• 1:41:45Joe Rogan?

  Terrifying study reveals AI robots have passed Turing tests and now are indistinguishable from humans, scientists say.

• 1:41:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:41:52Speaker 03

  Bro, we're so fucked.

• 1:41:53Speaker 01

  It, it is a- I think the good things is it'll probably cure loneliness a little bit. Like old people can have a little robot friend, that's good.

• 1:42:01Joe Rogan?

  100%, but it's gonna be real weird and it could be complete population collapse. Not, no bullshit.

• 1:42:08Speaker 01

  Because of the jobs they replace?

• 1:42:10Joe Rogan?

  They, the jobs they replace, people having no desire to take care of kids or have kids, when you can give a robot girlfriend.

• 1:42:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, robot girlfriend of evil. You also, I think it'd be a-

• 1:42:20Joe Rogan?

  You thought about- you're like, "Yeah, we're all-

• 1:42:22Speaker 01

  All gonna die.

• 1:42:23Joe Rogan?

  Robot girlfriend would be cool, like a nut inside this robot.

• 1:42:26Speaker 01

  They're gonna probably like sell like their vaginas separately to get the actual cash.

• 1:42:30Joe Rogan?

  A robot girlfriend that you have to keep alive with cum. The only way, it's the only way to keep her alive. I got the one, you gotta fill her up every day, or she just gets narcolepsy, falls asleep.

• 1:42:42Speaker 01

  What about meaning? That's, that's a problem, I think, to have. Robots will be better at everything, even already just songs. Like, I write music just for fun, but like, it's a talent that doesn't matter anymore, you know, like, uh. Nothing doesn't matter, but like, they're, they write very good songs already, AI, and then.

• 1:43:00Joe Rogan?

  Have you ever seen one of those photos of the entire Milky Way galaxy and there's a little dot of the earth? Since you are here.

• 1:43:08Speaker 01

  Yes, it's very disturbing and cool.

• 1:43:09Joe Rogan?

  Now imagine, meaning.

• 1:43:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Blue dot.

• 1:43:15Joe Rogan?

  It's all us. It's all subjective, like, meaning is meaning to us, because we think we're super important. But if we get surpassed by a superior life form that we actually create. Meaning. What does meaning mean anymore? It doesn't mean anything anymore if you don't have emotions. If you're the superior life form and emotions don't exist anymore, because you don't have a human reward system that's built in through thousands and thousands of years of evolution.

• 1:43:37Speaker 01

  You need a, I mean, a job just to not have a job and an identity.

• 1:43:41Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, the sun needs meaning. That's why it went supernova. It needed meaning. And it just couldn't help it, and it just like, yeah, see me. The sun needed to be seen. I felt so unseen as the sun that I had to blow out a solar flare and kill everyone's satellites.

• 1:43:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:44:01Joe Rogan?

  It's, meaning is our thing, and we decide that meaning is important, but objectively, for the universe, it's clearly not.

• 1:44:07Speaker 01

  Oh, the universe, no.

• 1:44:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, we are a tiny little fucking spot in the universe.

• 1:44:12Speaker 01

  I know.

• 1:44:12Joe Rogan?

  So like, what does meaning mean? It only means something to us because we need meaning.

• 1:44:17Speaker 01

  What do, what do you suggest people do, though, if they're, they start to get, they don't have a good job, they have to do, the robots do everything, we have universal income? And you're just, like, I went on vacation for three days and I was miserable.

• 1:44:27Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. You have to find something you enjoy, like, as humans. But again, this is just humans. With the robot fuck ladies and, you know, free food, there, there will be no more babies. The robot fuck ladies will take care of you.

• 1:44:41Speaker 01

  The robot fuck ladies will.

• 1:44:42Joe Rogan?

  They're gonna be a real problem.

• 1:44:44Speaker 01

  But the.

• 1:44:46Joe Rogan?

  They're gonna be a real problem. It's gonna be like that, just look at how many incels just stay at home now and play video games. Like, the, the number of men who never have sex and the number of men who have no girlfriends, it's like higher than it's ever been.

• 1:44:59Speaker 01

  Yeah, and then if you like fall in love with your robot girlfriend, and she's gonna be really nice to you.

• 1:45:05Speaker 03

  A robot brothel legal or no?

• 1:45:07Speaker 01

  Ooh.

• 1:45:10Joe Rogan?

  Ew!

• 1:45:11Speaker 03

  That's what you pay for. You pay for a fresh, uh, silicone mold every time or something.

• 1:45:17Joe Rogan?

  Legal, though?

• 1:45:18Speaker 01

  Ew. Definitely legal.

• 1:45:20Joe Rogan?

  Ew.

• 1:45:21Speaker 01

  It's like, it's legal to fuck your car, I think.

• 1:45:24Joe Rogan?

  It might be. It's if it's in the garage.

• 1:45:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, not out in public.

• 1:45:27Joe Rogan?

  You can't fuck your car in public.

• 1:45:28Speaker 01

  You've seen that guy who like fell in love with his car, that video?

• 1:45:31Joe Rogan?

  That's unreal.

• 1:45:32Speaker 01

  No, no, no, no, no, no, it's the real thing.

• 1:45:34Joe Rogan?

  Are you sure?

• 1:45:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:45:36Joe Rogan?

  And he let him film him and he kept it together while the cameras were on him for real?

• 1:45:39Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:45:40Joe Rogan?

  You ever think maybe they just set that up because it's stupid?

• 1:45:42Speaker 01

  Well, he, he's, if he's as good an actor as Daniel Day Lewis maybe, but this was very believable. And he tells his dad and it's.

• 1:45:48Joe Rogan?

  That he's in love with his car?

• 1:45:49Speaker 01

  Weird shit. It's just like a fetish thing in this guy.

• 1:45:53Joe Rogan?

  This is so fake. This is TLC.

• 1:45:55Speaker 01

  I love that. It's a hot car.

• 1:45:56Joe Rogan?

  This is like those people that eat toilet paper.

• 1:45:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:45:58Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:45:59Speaker 01

  Yeah, he loves it.

• 1:46:00Joe Rogan?

  Nah, I don't believe it.

• 1:46:01Speaker 01

  Look at him.

• 1:46:02Joe Rogan?

  Unless he's got like a real brain injury.

• 1:46:04Speaker 01

  That's good.

• 1:46:05Joe Rogan?

  He got hit by a line drive when he was six. Objectophilia. Oh, boy.

• 1:46:10Speaker 01

  It's a disease, Joe. These people have diseases.

• 1:46:12Joe Rogan?

  I think that's a problem, having too many names for stuff like narcolepsy, you know?

• 1:46:17Speaker 01

  Narcolepsy, we need a name for it.

• 1:46:19Joe Rogan?

  Figure it out. The people that were saying like dyslexia, figure it out. Figure it out. Stop falling asleep. Stop reading backwards. Figure it out.

• 1:46:27Speaker 01

  I did feel dumb, though. I, I wish I, I, uh, yeah, had that name. So I have a disease.

• 1:46:33Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Everybody wants to do ADHD. That's a weird one. People, some people say that's not a real thing.

• 1:46:38Speaker 01

  I, if I would grew up earlier, I would have been diagnosed as like on some kind of spectrum. I used to fly a kite till I. I used to fly a kite till I peed my pants. That's just like.

• 1:46:48Joe Rogan?

  It's a good move.

• 1:46:49Speaker 01

  Tongue out, like.

• 1:46:50Joe Rogan?

  Nice way to meet the ladies.

• 1:46:51Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:46:52Joe Rogan?

  Pissing in your pants in a fucking.

• 1:46:54Speaker 01

  I can't read.

• 1:46:55Joe Rogan?

  Balsa wood structure.

• 1:46:56Speaker 01

  Peeing my pants.

• 1:46:57Joe Rogan?

  Flying in the air behind you.

• 1:46:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, I just loved it. That's a very Asperger-y, I think it was.

• 1:47:02Joe Rogan?

  Well, look, if you want things that are extraordinary, you need people that are on the spectrum. Like, that's a fact.

• 1:47:08Speaker 01

  I know, yeah.

• 1:47:09Joe Rogan?

  It's one thing we should thank vaccines for. There's a lot of fascinating people have come out of that spectrum. A little lead paint here, a little fucking pesticide there.

• 1:47:20Speaker 01

  Touch it all.

• 1:47:21Joe Rogan?

  Next thing you know, you got some inflammation and some really good math.

• 1:47:26Speaker 01

  We grew up, like, we were near the same age, I think, where the worst food, like, when we were developing, the seventies food was just eighties. Just the biggest, I remember just having, like, that macaroni cheese mac, microwaved on this, like, plastic tray.

• 1:47:44Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:47:45Speaker 01

  It's just all chemicals.

• 1:47:46Joe Rogan?

  Chemicals, microplastics.

• 1:47:49Speaker 01

  Peanut butter and fluff, you ever eat that?

• 1:47:50Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 1:47:51Speaker 01

  That was, like, lunch.

• 1:47:52Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:47:52Speaker 01

  I'm gonna have, I'm gonna have a marshmallow for lunch.

• 1:47:55Joe Rogan?

  Fluff for nutters sandwich.

• 1:47:56Speaker 01

  On Wonder Bread, which is also...

• 1:47:58Joe Rogan?

  Sugar. And we ate garbage.

• 1:48:00Speaker 01

  I used to go, um, play, I played golf, like, obsessively for a while. And I would, I would walk eighteen holes, I'd have a Snickers and a Sprite, I'd walk another eighteen holes. I did this day after day, um, as, like, uh, I was, like, big into routine stuff. That was when I was growing, so I may have been taller. Had carrots.

• 1:48:19Joe Rogan?

  You just ate Snickers and Sprite?

• 1:48:20Speaker 01

  By the way, this was, like, a country club, it's not like, we weren't, like, we didn't grow up, like, rich, but, like, my dad, like, for, like, three years, we had this country club, and the food was free. Like, you had to spend, like, a thousand dollars a month or whatever on food. And no one else was going, my dad worked really hard, and I was the only one going, and I, instead of getting a lobster every day.

• 1:48:38Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:48:38Speaker 01

  He had Snickers, it was like thirteen-year-old, uh, Kyle.

• 1:48:42Joe Rogan?

  Damn.

• 1:48:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:48:44Joe Rogan?

  At least you got peanuts in the Snickers, got a little bit of protein.

• 1:48:47Speaker 01

  Which isn't even a nut, it's a legume, a gume, by the way.

• 1:48:50Joe Rogan?

  I wish Snickers were good for you, they're fucking delicious. It's a great snack to take when you're hiking.

• 1:48:55Speaker 01

  I found one in my car.

• 1:48:58Joe Rogan?

  Lord Sandwich was a very conversant gambler. What's a conversant gambler?

• 1:49:02Speaker 03

  He was very, like, he'd gamble a lot, wouldn't leave the table.

• 1:49:05Joe Rogan?

  Hmm. Story goes, did not take the time to have a meal during his long hours playing at the cards table. Consequently, he would ask his servants to bring him slices of meat between two slices of bread, a habit known amongst his gambling friends. Wow, so he just wanted to eat quick.

• 1:49:18Speaker 03

  Hence the sandwich.

• 1:49:20Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 1:49:21Speaker 01

  No one thought of that? I guess, yeah.

• 1:49:24Joe Rogan?

  Just cuz he's a gambling, so he's a degenerate.

• 1:49:26Speaker 03

  Gambling.

• 1:49:28Speaker 01

  I got my, I wanna promote my crypto coin real quick.

• 1:49:34Joe Rogan?

  What is it?

• 1:49:34Speaker 01

  That's my merch.

• 1:49:35Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, baby coin?

• 1:49:36Speaker 01

  That's yeah, it's the Hawk 3, yeah, baby coin.

• 1:49:39Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, baby coin.

• 1:49:40Speaker 01

  Skyrocketing, yeah.

• 1:49:41Joe Rogan?

  You ever thought about making a coin?

• 1:49:42Speaker 01

  It's zero.

• 1:49:43Joe Rogan?

  Why not? Anybody can do it now.

• 1:49:45Speaker 01

  Oh, Joe Rogan coin, that'd be good.

• 1:49:48Joe Rogan?

  Good way to rip people off.

• 1:49:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:49:51Joe Rogan?

  We thought about doing it, but we're like, what does it do? What can you buy with it? How's it work?

• 1:49:55Speaker 01

  It's total gambling.

• 1:49:57Joe Rogan?

  Kurt Metzger said it best, he's like, it's just fucking gamblers. They're gambling addicts.

• 1:50:01Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a total.

• 1:50:03Joe Rogan?

  That's what the crypto coin thing is, it's a bunch of gambling addicts, and they're all gambling on these meme coins.

• 1:50:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:50:08Joe Rogan?

  And they're making money, some of them are making money, and there's shifty deals and pump and dumps.

• 1:50:12Speaker 01

  It's really shady.

• 1:50:14Joe Rogan?

  But it's kinda legal. It's weird. The whole thing's weird.

• 1:50:17Speaker 01

  It is a little bit of like, if you fall for this, well, you shouldn't have money, kinda thing too, like, alright, did you really?

• 1:50:22Joe Rogan?

  How's that Trump coin doing? Not good?

• 1:50:26Speaker 01

  I think Bitcoin is.

• 1:50:28Joe Rogan?

  Oh, is it because of the economy? So, are you paying attention to all this tariff stuff? You're not, you can't read.

• 1:50:33Speaker 01

  No, no, I am. I actually am very interested in finance.

• 1:50:37Speaker 01

  No, I watch videos of finance. I watch finance videos like every night. I'm very into it, yeah. I've actually learned so much cuz of YouTube, cuz I can watch the things, and I realize I'm actually interested in a lot of things. Um, yes, I know, I know something about this tariff.

• 1:50:50Joe Rogan?

  It just dropped while we're watching it.

• 1:50:52Speaker 01

  Ah, shit, nine dollars.

• 1:50:54Speaker 03

  It's actually doubled today.

• 1:50:55Joe Rogan?

  It's dropping while we're watching, it's dropping. These people are gambling.

• 1:50:59Speaker 01

  Jesus.

• 1:50:59Joe Rogan?

  They're buying and selling. So what is it worth now?

• 1:51:02Speaker 03

  Nine dollars and thirty seven cents.

• 1:51:03Joe Rogan?

  And what was it worth at its height?

• 1:51:04Speaker 03

  Eighty dollars?

• 1:51:05Joe Rogan?

  Eighty dollars, wow. Seventy five dollars at its height.

• 1:51:08Speaker 01

  Get your Trump coin. What did he make off that? I'm very curious.

• 1:51:13Joe Rogan?

  How does that work?

• 1:51:14Speaker 03

  Billion, two billion dollar market cap.

• 1:51:16Joe Rogan?

  Two billion dollars?

• 1:51:17Speaker 01

  Still? At nine dollars?

• 1:51:18Joe Rogan?

  So that's what it's worth now? That means all the Trump coins are worth two billion bucks? Is that what it means?

• 1:51:24Speaker 03

  Collectively.

• 1:51:24Joe Rogan?

  Collectively.

• 1:51:25Speaker 01

  So that was worth like?

• 1:51:26Joe Rogan?

  Look, look at the big spike in the beginning, and then a bunch of people like, sucker.

• 1:51:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, that is a total.

• 1:51:32Joe Rogan?

  That has to be what happened, right? Like, how many people sold?

• 1:51:35Speaker 01

  What did Trump make off that?

• 1:51:37Joe Rogan?

  So there's two, how many days is it? Scroll your thing over there. How many days do you have? You have hours. You have hours before a giant drop off. Look at that.

• 1:51:46Speaker 03

  About 12 hours.

• 1:51:47Joe Rogan?

  You have 12 hours and then by Sunday, the 19th, it drops radically.

• 1:51:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, it already dropped.

• 1:51:53Speaker 01

  But I bet those first 12 hours, like you couldn't eat, like most people couldn't trade it.

• 1:51:56Joe Rogan?

  But look at that first 12 hours. That is crypto coins. That's meme coins, not, not like Bitcoin, not like Ethereum, but like that is a meme coin. That, that first thing, that explosion, that's what I expect.

• 1:52:08Speaker 01

  That's garbage.

• 1:52:08Joe Rogan?

  That's what I expect. But I also, I support it. Why not?

• 1:52:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:52:13Joe Rogan?

  If you could do that, like, look, if you can go fucking play cards, if you could figure out a way to three-card money people on the streets of New York, like, okay.

• 1:52:21Speaker 01

  I used to play poker all the time. I went through a phase. I actually won the Borgata tournament, I won a tournament there. I had $6,000 in my, I had lost my luggage on a flight like weeks before. I'm like, I'm not gonna lose this cash, cause I, you know, didn't have too much money. So I put, I put like 3,000 or something in my suitcase, but I'm like, I'm gonna put like 3,000 in my pants, cause I'm not gonna lose this money. And then I missed my flight. So now I slept over at the airport with like giant.

• 1:52:48Joe Rogan?

  Wads.

• 1:52:48Speaker 01

  Wads.

• 1:52:50Joe Rogan?

  But you made it.

• 1:52:51Speaker 01

  I made it back.

• 1:52:53Joe Rogan?

  So why'd you stop playing? Was it too much?

• 1:52:55Speaker 01

  It wasted time. Yeah, like I actually, um, really studied and I, I, you know, was the winning, didn't make a ton of money, but like I didn't lose, you know, um, a big amount of money. I think I'm like, probably after playing 1 million hours, I'm up like $4. You know what I mean? It's like a total waste of my life.

• 1:53:16Joe Rogan?

  Ari was doing it in the early days of his comedy career, he was making money doing that.

• 1:53:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:53:20Joe Rogan?

  That's how he'd make a living, he'd play in tournaments.

• 1:53:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, you can, especially in like Vegas, like with, people come into, um, you know, they're just having fun, you can just be very disciplined and just.

• 1:53:28Joe Rogan?

  He would go to those, uh, card casinos that were out in California, like Bellflower.

• 1:53:32Speaker 01

  I went, I know you're talking about Bicycle Casino, Commerce, yeah.

• 1:53:36Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:53:36Speaker 01

  They're like, hey Kyle, Kyle's back.

• 1:53:38Joe Rogan?

  I know ya. You were there a lot, huh?

• 1:53:40Speaker 01

  But I just, I stopped, I, it's a waste of time.

• 1:53:44Joe Rogan?

  Well, for Ari, that was literally how he made a living, when he wasn't making a living doing comedy yet.

• 1:53:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:53:50Joe Rogan?

  He was that good and he's like really dis- oh, he's very disciplined.

• 1:53:53Speaker 01

  You ha- yeah.

• 1:53:53Joe Rogan?

  Organized, like he doesn't do anything stupid.

• 1:53:56Speaker 01

  Texas Hold'em is all like, just gotta fold, fold, fold, fold, you know, and just, you know, really be really disciplined. People just start fucking around and get drunk and you're just...

• 1:54:04Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you have to understand how many cards there are. If you have this, there's different guys, you see the cards are on a table, you have to do calculations.

• 1:54:11Speaker 01

  There's the math of it and just, once you know that, it's like, and then it becomes second nature, you'd know kind of right away.

• 1:54:17Joe Rogan?

  And then there's ESP.

• 1:54:19Speaker 01

  There's, yeah.

• 1:54:20Joe Rogan?

  Read people's minds, know when they're bullshitting.

• 1:54:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I went up to Vegas once and I was, I was depressed. I never get depressed. I'm not gonna, but I situationally, I was like, I'm gonna go just take five grand. I just drove to Vegas, like a lunatic by myself.

• 1:54:34Joe Rogan?

  By yourself?

• 1:54:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:54:36Joe Rogan?

  What time did you leave the house?

• 1:54:37Speaker 01

  No idea. I don't remember.

• 1:54:39Joe Rogan?

  Daytime or nighttime though? That's important, because it takes four hours to get there.

• 1:54:41Speaker 01

  Oh, it was like 5:00 PM-ish, it was like later. I was actually about to do a show, a live show on my YouTube channel and I, I was under so much stress. You know, there's like editing and writing and then it's just like all me and I just was like, gonna, you know, all these characters. I just was like, really stressed out. And I didn't think the show was good and I'm like, just didn't do it and I just went, this is on top of, I was, the pandemic, I was so isolated and then it was too much alone, you know, kind of thing and uh...

• 1:55:11Joe Rogan?

  For a lot of people, I think.

• 1:55:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think that kind of fucked me up a little bit.

• 1:55:14Joe Rogan?

  It cracked quite a few people.

• 1:55:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:55:16Joe Rogan?

  Especially the most vulnerable amongst us. You know, a lot of comedians that are like very kind of socially awkward already, you isolate them.

• 1:55:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, you're staring at me pretty hard.

• 1:55:27Joe Rogan?

  LA.

• 1:55:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:55:28Joe Rogan?

  No, I'm not. Um, I'm not thinking about you at all.

• 1:55:31Speaker 01

  I'm just kidding.

• 1:55:31Joe Rogan?

  But there's some of us that just like, kind of never came back from it, you know?

• 1:55:36Speaker 01

  I haven't had a, a steady girlfriend since, I think maybe I got weird or something.

• 1:55:41Joe Rogan?

  Did you? Do you feel like?

• 1:55:42Speaker 01

  I don't, I think I'm very normal, but I must be.

• 1:55:44Joe Rogan?

  Maybe after the show, the calls will start coming in.

• 1:55:47Speaker 01

  No, they won't.

• 1:55:48Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, baby.

• 1:55:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, baby. We got bros watching.

• 1:55:52Joe Rogan?

  After the Netflix thing, they might, but they want to...

• 1:55:54Speaker 01

  No, I don't think I'm recognizable.

• 1:55:56Joe Rogan?

  I don't want to say what you did.

• 1:55:57Speaker 01

  I don't think I, that was, by the way, we can say this, like, what I had was ridiculous.

• 1:56:01Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 1:56:02Speaker 01

  And it was like, I wanted to take it off.

• 1:56:05Joe Rogan?

  Don't say anymore, because we don't want to give anything away.

• 1:56:08Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:56:08Joe Rogan?

  Because it comes out, it comes out on Monday.

• 1:56:10Speaker 01

  What time is this, when does this come out?

• 1:56:11Joe Rogan?

  This comes out tomorrow.

• 1:56:12Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:56:14Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, so we can't do that.

• 1:56:16Speaker 01

  Ooh, this is good action. People listen, they're like, oh, I gotta see that.

• 1:56:18Joe Rogan?

  Hang in there. Yeah.

• 1:56:20Speaker 01

  That really is gonna be, um, like, nothing else on that channel.

• 1:56:24Joe Rogan?

  Game changer. Game changer. Yeah. No, it was phenomenal. And the show is, it's so real. The show's so real. It's like seeing people kill, seeing people bomb, seeing people have great moments.

• 1:56:35Speaker 01

  It was, yeah, it was unbelievable.

• 1:56:36Joe Rogan?

  It's the best thing for comedy. Because it gives comics like a, it's, there's a real career path now. If you could bang out a solid minute on Kill Tony, you get into the ecosystem.

• 1:56:45Speaker 01

  It's also such a high-wire act, because you, like, in doing a character, if you do SNL, it's like, sure, very nerve-wracking. But this is like SNL, but you have no script. You gotta go like, I gotta try to make things funny. And when you're dressed up like a thing.

• 1:56:57Joe Rogan?

  Shh, shh, shh, shh.

• 1:57:00Joe Rogan?

  Can't give away. Don't give it away.

• 1:57:01Speaker 01

  I won't say, I won't say. But, but, you're like, everything you say, they think is gonna be, you gotta, it's gotta be a joke. But, um, it was really cool, because right before we went on, I'm trying to say, I think I said this.

• 1:57:15Joe Rogan?

  You can't say shit.

• 1:57:16Speaker 01

  No, no, but like, the cra-

• 1:57:17Joe Rogan?

  Tony will get mad.

• 1:57:18Speaker 01

  But I don't, I think this, we could say the, the crowd didn't know.

• 1:57:23Joe Rogan?

  No, they didn't know it was gonna be on Netflix.

• 1:57:25Speaker 01

  And it was so exciting when they, they found out. It was like, gah, gah.

• 1:57:28Joe Rogan?

  When they found out it was the first ever show on Netflix, they went nuts. The eruption in the room was amazing.

• 1:57:33Speaker 01

  It was really very-

• 1:57:35Joe Rogan?

  It was pretty badass. It's, uh, and having that show at this club every week has been, it's incredible. It's just, it's so good for comedy.

• 1:57:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, you, um, it, it worked out. Like, you, I remember when you were gonna go to Austin, and I'm like, this, this Joe guy doesn't know what he's doing. I was telling people that. This Joe guy doesn't know what the hell he's doing. And I was wrong.

• 1:57:55Joe Rogan?

  Thank you for your vote of support. Yeah, I didn't think I knew what I was doing. I was like, I would, I'd bet against me. I'd be like, good luck doing that. But it was like, all these things had a, it's almost like the universe wanted it to be made. Because it couldn't have been made with just me. It's just like, if it was just me and some money, that, you can't make that club. You need all these pieces. It's like you have to hit every green light. And you could never bank on it. You have to have a pandemic, it has to get shut down, you have to live in a ridiculous place like LA, where they won't let the Comedy Store open for a fucking year and a half, so people are unemployed. I can snatch those people up. I just happened to get a big pile of money from Spotify. I moved to this new city. A bunch of other guys start moving to this new city, and then all of a sudden, we have like fifteen, sixteen top comics living in the city. Like, okay.

• 1:58:41Joe Rogan?

  This is why it can work. It like a bunch of things had Ron White had already be here. He he'll kind of lured me here because before the pandemic, he moved here. And he was telling me how great it was. I fucking love it. I fucking love Austin. I was like, really? Texas? I don't know. And I was like, I don't know if I could live there. But then when the shit hit the fan and we started doing shows in Texas and putting it on Instagram, then all these guys were like, fuck that. I'm moving to Texas. And then next thing you know, Segura is here, Christina Pizitzky is here, Tim Dillon is here. It's just like Shane Gillis moved. It's like it came Duncan moved here. It just came in this wave. Brian Simpson, Brian Simpson was here early, early on, way before the club. We were doing shows at the Vulcan and we were all talking about making a club.

• 1:59:24Joe Rogan?

  But to fucking actually do it is the weirdest thing. Like when you go there, it's like it's part of this weird illusion that you're living in. It's weird fucking bizarre hallucination you're having.

• 1:59:36Speaker 01

  It's like a leap, like a field of dreams. You built it and then they came.

• 1:59:40Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, Austin is now like a comedy town.

• 1:59:44Joe Rogan?

  It's a huge comedy town. It's a huge live performance town already, right? Because there's so much great music here.

• 1:59:49Speaker 01

  There's a lot of vomit too.

• 1:59:50Joe Rogan?

  Lot of puke, lot of homeless people.

• 1:59:53Speaker 01

  Lot of great drugs.

• 1:59:54Joe Rogan?

  That's what I hear.

• 1:59:56Speaker 01

  I wouldn't know. And yeah, it's a.

• 2:00:00Joe Rogan?

  When are you moving here? You know, you hate the cold of winter.

• 2:00:03Speaker 01

  I I I do. And and I think.

• 2:00:07Joe Rogan?

  This is a more inviting environment for a guy like you anyway.

• 2:00:10Speaker 01

  I know I have family back east, but I don't.

• 2:00:13Joe Rogan?

  They can move.

• 2:00:14Speaker 01

  I don't think they love me. I'm finding out. I don't think they love me anyway.

• 2:00:17Joe Rogan?

  What happened?

• 2:00:17Speaker 01

  They just they just told me they didn't love me anymore. Yeah.

• 2:00:21Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 2:00:21Speaker 01

  Which I respect.

• 2:00:22Joe Rogan?

  What'd you say first?

• 2:00:24Speaker 01

  Huh?

• 2:00:24Joe Rogan?

  Did you say I don't love you first?

• 2:00:25Speaker 01

  No, no, I was like, I love you guys. And then they just kind of shook their heads. So I no one visits me.

• 2:00:30Joe Rogan?

  Take a hint.

• 2:00:32Speaker 01

  Huh?

• 2:00:32Joe Rogan?

  Take a hint. Time to move.

• 2:00:33Speaker 01

  I know. I I think it would, my my career would be better out here for sure.

• 2:00:38Joe Rogan?

  For sure. You'd be around more like minded people and you get to understand the journey of Brian Holtzman.

• 2:00:44Speaker 01

  I need to, yeah, read up on him.

• 2:00:46Joe Rogan?

  Need to watch him.

• 2:00:48Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yep.

• 2:00:50Joe Rogan?

  There's a lot of clubs here, too. That's the beautiful thing about this place. You can get up anywhere here in town. There's so many clubs. It's hopping like every night of the week.

• 2:00:59Speaker 01

  Yeah, your club, though, uh, is better than, and I'm not just saying that because I'm here, Joe. I'm not lying to you. But it's better than the Vulcan. I don't know if you've been to the Vulcan. It's a great club.

• 2:01:10Joe Rogan?

  Thank you.

• 2:01:12Joe Rogan?

  Tough call.

• 2:01:13Speaker 01

  Tough call. They probably get runoff from people who can't get into your club.

• 2:01:16Joe Rogan?

  They have great shows there all the time. A lot of the guys from the club do shows over there. They do it all the time.

• 2:01:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:01:22Joe Rogan?

  It's like that and then Brian Redban's room, The Sunset, which is right down the street. That's only like four or five doors down. And that place is packed all the time. That place is killer.

• 2:01:33Speaker 01

  That format on Kill Tony is just, uh,

• 2:01:36Joe Rogan?

  Perfect.

• 2:01:37Speaker 01

  So great.

• 2:01:37Joe Rogan?

  Perfect. He's got it dialed in. It's like a finely oiled machine.

• 2:01:42Speaker 01

  It's like you or, or anybody who does things for, he's been doing it for years.

• 2:01:46Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:01:47Speaker 01

  And, uh,

• 2:01:48Joe Rogan?

  Knows the rhythm of it.

• 2:01:49Speaker 01

  Like imagine like, like how people come up concept of a show. And you would never come up with this, you would never go, this is gonna work right away, this Kill Tony format.

• 2:01:58Joe Rogan?

  Well, it needed like years and years of development.

• 2:02:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 2:02:02Joe Rogan?

  This is the thing, like they did that show once a week for a decade.

• 2:02:06Speaker 01

  I know.

• 2:02:07Joe Rogan?

  A decade. They never missed an episode. They did it during the pandemic with no crowd.

• 2:02:12Speaker 01

  Oh, really?

• 2:02:12Joe Rogan?

  Yes. Yes, they did Kill Tony in the main room with no crowd. They livestreamed it.

• 2:02:20Speaker 01

  Oh, right.

• 2:02:21Joe Rogan?

  Bro, the whole, like, they never let go. They never, they're like a pit bull on a sack of nuts, just clamp. And then never let go. And now it's enormous. Like, that episode where, um, Adam Ray played Joe Biden and Shane Gillis played, uh, Trump. I think that has like, no, way more.

• 2:02:40Speaker 01

  Really?

• 2:02:40Joe Rogan?

  I think it's like 60 million people have watched it on YouTube.

• 2:02:43Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 2:02:44Joe Rogan?

  How many, how many people, Jamie?

• 2:02:45Speaker 03

  Twenty-five.

• 2:02:46Speaker 01

  Ooh, Donna, get nailed it.

• 2:02:48Joe Rogan?

  I lied.

• 2:02:49Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 2:02:50Joe Rogan?

  I thought it was a lot more than that.

• 2:02:51Speaker 01

  Well, there's probably also clips. If you put it together, it's um.

• 2:02:55Joe Rogan?

  Maybe that's what it is.

• 2:02:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:02:56Joe Rogan?

  Cause I was told it was like sixty million people watched it.

• 2:02:58Speaker 01

  People just know that it's a high.

• 2:02:59Joe Rogan?

  Maybe it's all of them. But if you think about all the clips on top of that, I mean, it's a giant show now.

• 2:03:06Speaker 01

  I think a lot of also there's.

• 2:03:07Joe Rogan?

  Damn, it's only twenty-five million. Why did I think it was more? Is there, maybe he's adding multiple ones where those guys were on together.

• 2:03:16Speaker 01

  There's some value in having a live show now, which pops more than other. Cause you can tell that show is improvised.

• 2:03:23Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 2:03:23Speaker 01

  There's so many moments that are awkward and don't work. It makes it even more.

• 2:03:27Joe Rogan?

  Live is fun.

• 2:03:27Speaker 01

  Interesting to watch, yeah.

• 2:03:28Joe Rogan?

  It's dangerous.

• 2:03:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's also super stressful, but.

• 2:03:32Joe Rogan?

  Also, you, with Kill Tony, you're literally getting crazy people and giving them a microphone.

• 2:03:38Speaker 01

  I know.

• 2:03:38Joe Rogan?

  Some of those people are out of their fucking minds. Half of them are homeless.

• 2:03:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 2:03:43Joe Rogan?

  Half of them are sleeping in their car.

• 2:03:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 2:03:45Joe Rogan?

  A lot of them like drove from Seattle. One guy, well, let's say the story. But there's.

• 2:03:50Speaker 01

  Save it like the Lariket story. Just let it simmer.

• 2:03:52Joe Rogan?

  What about that Lariket story? Now's the time.

• 2:03:55Speaker 01

  The time?

• 2:03:55Joe Rogan?

  Now's the time.

• 2:03:56Speaker 01

  Now's the time.

• 2:03:57Joe Rogan?

  Don't sit out.

• 2:03:57Speaker 01

  Boy, this better be a good story.

• 2:03:59Joe Rogan?

  It doesn't have to be. It'd be funny if it's not.

• 2:04:01Speaker 01

  Tease.

• 2:04:03Speaker 01

  I think you're gonna get your wish.

• 2:04:06Speaker 01

  All right, so on this, only thing I've ever like booked where I, where I, like sitcom I ever booked, where I was like, I read, I did callbacks. There was like four callbacks, okay? Finally, I got a sitcom. And it was like a reoccurring role. It was, and I played this, this guy, this girl's boyfriend. And she like did not find me. I could tell she was like, ugh, because we'd have a make out scene.

• 2:04:28Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 2:04:30Speaker 01

  So, we go to the table read. You know, the table read was like where the network come and you all sit around and they just laugh and everyone's having a great time. So, right before our table read, um, they go, Kyle, we got some new lines for you. About like eight new li- there were like all new lines. And I knew how my reading was. We've talked about that. And so I'm panicking a little bit like, okay, Kyle, you can do this. Just read, just read good, Kyle. I'm thinking in my head.

• 2:04:58Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my god.

• 2:04:59Speaker 01

  So it's going around the table. It's like, ha, ha, ha, it's killing. Gets to me, my line. I'm like, if, if, if I go to the to store, then we can get it.

• 2:05:10Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 2:05:10Speaker 01

  And then death, then it goes around the table, ha, there, me.

• 2:05:15Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 2:05:15Speaker 01

  I found, and then afterwards, I'm like, oh, um, I think I'm fired. And it was so much like climbing a mountain to get this job. And then the next day, I didn't get a call. No one said you're fired. So I come in the next day. And I'm about to get to the door and the casting director's like, whoop. And she goes, you're, we're not, you're, you can go home. You, we're, they're gonna go a different direction. They said that.

• 2:05:40Joe Rogan?

  You can go home?

• 2:05:41Speaker 01

  You can go home. I got there. And I, and she goes, but you're going to Iraq. That'll be cool. She's trying to make small talk because I was going to Iraq like the next week.

• 2:05:50Joe Rogan?

  To do stand up?

• 2:05:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, USO tour. Kind of a hero, I guess.

• 2:05:57Speaker 01

  No one wanted us to see it. It was, yeah, so my, my.

• 2:06:01Joe Rogan?

  You can go home is the most fucked up way to tell someone they're fired.

• 2:06:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:06:05Joe Rogan?

  They're gonna go a different way.

• 2:06:07Speaker 01

  Oh, okay.

• 2:06:07Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 2:06:08Speaker 01

  And then I get to go to Iraq. So that was my prize.

• 2:06:10Joe Rogan?

  You should have told them you can't read.

• 2:06:13Speaker 01

  I should have said.

• 2:06:14Joe Rogan?

  I'm dyslexic.

• 2:06:15Speaker 01

  You know, you're so nervous and you want to be like, I'm not a problem and I can do it.

• 2:06:18Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:06:20Speaker 01

  But anyway, show sucked. Anyway, show sucked.

• 2:06:23Joe Rogan?

  Did it?

• 2:06:24Speaker 01

  Yeah. It was no Sanford and Son.

• 2:06:27Joe Rogan?

  Well, I didn't even know about it until an hour ago.

• 2:06:30Speaker 01

  You, you got that Neurogum? That you just did?

• 2:06:32Joe Rogan?

  No, this is a.

• 2:06:34Speaker 01

  I stole a pack of, of, or someone got me a pack of Neurogum.

• 2:06:37Joe Rogan?

  You like that stuff, huh?

• 2:06:38Speaker 01

  Well, I, you know, I wanted a little pick me up and.

• 2:06:41Joe Rogan?

  Want some coffee?

• 2:06:42Speaker 01

  I went online. No, I'm good now, but like I was online and I, I wanted to buy this stuff and try it. And I got scammed. It was like Nutra gum, the same packaging as Neurogum. And then I was like, this ain't the stuff.

• 2:06:54Joe Rogan?

  These motherfuckers.

• 2:06:55Speaker 01

  These motherfuckers.

• 2:06:56Joe Rogan?

  Do you mess around with nootropics though? There's a lot of good ones out there.

• 2:07:00Speaker 01

  Neutropics.

• 2:07:01Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that's what neuro.

• 2:07:02Speaker 01

  I know what that word means, but why don't you tell the audience?

• 2:07:04Joe Rogan?

  It's, it's these things. This is Neuro Mints. This is the same company, they make mints.

• 2:07:11Speaker 01

  Just like caffeine?

• 2:07:12Joe Rogan?

  No, it's like theanine, caffeine, a bunch of, it's essentially nutrients that help brain function. So it helps with your memory. It helps with your verbal memory, like to be able to read, you know, sometimes you're searching for a word, you can't find it. The stuff helps with that.

• 2:07:26Speaker 01

  Helping you read?

• 2:07:27Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, not just this, it probably would, prob, I think it's just, it, it helps, it's the building blocks for human neurotransmitters, as it's been explained to me. Like, there's certain nutrients that like, you know, like vitamin D, it helps muscle synthesis, it helps a bunch of things, helps your immune function. There's a bunch of nutrients that do different things in your body, right?

• 2:07:47Speaker 01

  Alright.

• 2:07:48Joe Rogan?

  And theanine is a really good one for memory. Um, there's a bunch of, uh, alpha choline, um, was it alpha GPC choline, is that what it is? Acetylcholine, there's a, quite a few different nutrients that have been identified as to helping brain function. And so the way I found out about this stuff, there was Bill Romanowski, the football player, he has a company, he's got really good stuff. It's called Neuro One. And, uh, it's like a scoop, you just mix it in water and blend it up or whatever, and it's, uh, and I, I tried, I was on a radio station in San Francisco and they gave it to me. I was like, this is great, where can you get this? Like, it really does, like, give you a little pick-me-up.

• 2:08:28Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 2:08:28Joe Rogan?

  Just, but not like, like, five shots of espresso, you're like, ah! It's just like a little edge of focus.

• 2:08:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, I could use a little memory, um, booster. I don't sleep well enough, I'm really, uh, gonna try to fix that, cause, uh...

• 2:08:43Joe Rogan?

  What are you gonna do to fix it?

• 2:08:45Speaker 01

  I'm gonna, you're gonna be really proud of me, you ready?

• 2:08:48Joe Rogan?

  Okay, I'm ready.

• 2:08:49Speaker 01

  I'm gonna be taking, I have a jujitsu class on Monday, my first one.

• 2:08:52Joe Rogan?

  Really? That'll help you sleep.

• 2:08:53Speaker 01

  I think so.

• 2:08:54Joe Rogan?

  You'll probably go to sleep a bunch of times in class.

• 2:08:55Speaker 01

  Yeah. I actually do not have a, a neck for like a chokehold kind of sport. I have, I'm thirty percent neck.

• 2:09:04Joe Rogan?

  Well, um, that's, it is a large target, but my advice would be just to take it easy, slowly at first. How old are you now?

• 2:09:12Speaker 01

  Twenty-six.

• 2:09:13Joe Rogan?

  You look great.

• 2:09:13Speaker 01

  I look like shit for twenty-six.

• 2:09:14Joe Rogan?

  You look great. Just go slowly. That's my advice. Don't try to go too fast, especially if you have been working out hard. Have you been working out hard?

• 2:09:23Speaker 01

  Not, and then no.

• 2:09:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:09:25Speaker 01

  The answer's no to that.

• 2:09:26Joe Rogan?

  So that means, you know, your joints are not gonna be the most resilient. Don't try to do it all at once. That's my thing. With that, by the way, that's with everything. If like, I'm gonna run a marathon tomorrow. Hey, hey, hey, have you ever run before? No, I don't run at all.

• 2:09:39Speaker 01

  Right, right, right.

• 2:09:39Joe Rogan?

  Okay. Let's not run a marathon. Let's run a mile. Let's do one mile, which is a lot if you haven't run. A mile is a lot. If you do not run, a mile is a lot.

• 2:09:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:09:51Joe Rogan?

  But you can't just run a marathon. And if you're gonna do jiu-jitsu, like, start slow. Don't try to do a two-and-a-half-hour session, I'm gonna roll with five guys today, like, di-di-di-di-di-di-di. Learn an arm bar. Learn how to tap. Okay, this is a triangle.

• 2:10:05Speaker 01

  I told them, like, give me the most beginner thing.

• 2:10:08Joe Rogan?

  Oh, they have to do it that way. Everyone's gonna do it that way. Nobody teaches you, like, flying triangles the moment you get into the class. They teach you beginner stuff like, this is the mount, this is side control, this is the guard. They teach you, like, simple basics.

• 2:10:23Speaker 01

  It's good for confidence, too, I hear.

• 2:10:24Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:10:25Speaker 01

  If you can fight.

• 2:10:26Joe Rogan?

  It'll help a lot. It does. But it also, it's great for stress relief. Because no matter what your day is, it will never be as stressful as some dude mounting you, trying to choke you unconscious.

• 2:10:37Speaker 01

  This is now-

• 2:10:38Joe Rogan?

  Because if you fight that off and then you're done with your class, like, regular stuff is like, whatever, man. Some crazy homeless guy, man, fuck you. You're like, fuck you, too, bye, take care. You don't wanna, you know, you don't even wanna be in any, you don't have this desire to puff your chest out like a lot of people do. It's like, stop.

• 2:10:54Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm. Now, you're proud of me for doing this. Now, you're about to be not proud of me. Ready?

• 2:10:58Joe Rogan?

  Okay, I'm ready.

• 2:10:59Speaker 01

  Okay?

• 2:10:59Joe Rogan?

  It's girls' class.

• 2:11:02Joe Rogan?

  It's all women's jiu-jitsu.

• 2:11:03Speaker 01

  I would not even want that. I don't wanna get boners when I'm like, I would not want that.

• 2:11:07Joe Rogan?

  You're a woman. You're not gonna get a boner.

• 2:11:10Speaker 01

  No, if I'm there-

• 2:11:10Joe Rogan?

  You're a woman, Kyle. Don't let anybody ever tell you different.

• 2:11:14Speaker 01

  Thank you so much for not misidentifying me.

• 2:11:17Joe Rogan?

  Don't let anyone deny your humanity.

• 2:11:20Speaker 01

  I'm a ma'am.

• 2:11:21Joe Rogan?

  No, what am I not gonna get, what am I gonna get upset about?

• 2:11:23Speaker 01

  I'm also taking a pickleball class.

• 2:11:25Joe Rogan?

  I like pickleball. You know who plays pickleball every day?

• 2:11:28Speaker 01

  Wait, let me guess. Twenty questions.

• 2:11:29Joe Rogan?

  It's the only time I ever let you guess. Every time I jump in.

• 2:11:33Speaker 01

  I'm gonna say- Uh, Duncan Trussell takes pickleball.

• 2:11:39Joe Rogan?

  He might, but that's not who I was thinking of. Kid Rock plays pickleball every day.

• 2:11:44Speaker 01

  I love any kind of racket ball sport.

• 2:11:47Joe Rogan?

  He goes, "Yeah, I get up at eight o'clock in the morning, my fucking trainer comes over to play pickleball." I'm like, "Every day?" He's like, "Every day." I love it.

• 2:11:53Speaker 01

  I want that kind of money where I can just pay out and come over and play pickleball.

• 2:11:56Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it was a trainer. He's got a trainer. Probably teaching him. I bet he's a pickleball wizard now. He probably knows how to do the secret moves. Uh, slice the ball.

• 2:12:04Speaker 01

  I'll destroy Kid Rock at pickleball.

• 2:12:07Joe Rogan?

  You think so?

• 2:12:07Speaker 01

  I'll destroy that guy. He's a clown.

• 2:12:09Joe Rogan?

  Whoa.

• 2:12:10Speaker 01

  Kid Rock is a clown.

• 2:12:11Joe Rogan?

  I can't believe you're calling him out like this on my show.

• 2:12:13Speaker 01

  Dude, I'm just saying. I don't think he's got it in him.

• 2:12:15Joe Rogan?

  He brought Bill Maher to the White House. I have that underwear on. He brought Bill Maher to the White House and they had dinner with the president.

• 2:12:23Speaker 01

  Are we in like a Mad Libs episode with?

• 2:12:25Joe Rogan?

  I hope so. I hope so. I'm scared of this tariff stuff because it's radical change. I'm scared of radical change.

• 2:12:31Speaker 01

  Well, let me tell you what I think and I don't know anything.

• 2:12:33Joe Rogan?

  Good. We don't, both of us don't know. This is a perfect time to speculate about the economy.

• 2:12:37Speaker 01

  This is all his negotiating. It's gonna come down. It's not, it's not gonna stay like this. The bad thing will be if all the other countries go, "Fuck you, America. We're not gonna do any, we're not gonna negotiate."

• 2:12:46Joe Rogan?

  It's always a possibility.

• 2:12:47Speaker 01

  Then that's a problem, I think.

• 2:12:48Joe Rogan?

  It's always a possibility. Also, you're not nearly as charming if people can't speak your language. Like, Trump is used to being able to charm people. He's very charming, but if you can't speak his language.

• 2:12:57Speaker 01

  Might look, yeah, might be really bad.

• 2:12:59Joe Rogan?

  Fuck this orange asshole. You know what I mean? Like, you know, I don't even know this guy. What is he saying? And someone has to tell you what he said? Like, it's not cute when Boris Yevgenovich has to translate in your ear. "Mr. Putin, he says, these tariffs, this is bullshit. It's part of the game."

• 2:13:16Speaker 01

  Terrific thing.

• 2:13:17Joe Rogan?

  It's part of the card game. We are playing all together globally.

• 2:13:21Speaker 01

  It's like, you know, the woman from like Poland, and she's like, "Oh, you're a comedian? Tell a joke." And you're like, "No, you're not gonna find this funny. I can't tell you a joke."

• 2:13:29Joe Rogan?

  Let me tell you first about the history of my country and suffering. Let me tell you how many people stall and starve to death and then you tell me your cute little fucking joke.

• 2:13:41Speaker 01

  In my village. Yeah, I've had that happen to me recently. I was like, I'm not telling you. It's not gonna go well.

• 2:13:46Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that's a tough one. When people ask me if they don't know who I am genuinely, the easiest one to say is I do commentary for the UFC.

• 2:13:55Speaker 01

  Oh, that's good.

• 2:13:57Joe Rogan?

  Cause if I say podcast.

• 2:13:59Speaker 01

  Well, people know you now. I mean, I can get away with that.

• 2:14:01Joe Rogan?

  It's nice. Every now and then I get a person who doesn't know who I am, like some old fella.

• 2:14:05Speaker 01

  An old fella.

• 2:14:05Joe Rogan?

  What do you do?

• 2:14:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:14:06Joe Rogan?

  What do you do, Sean? I do commentary for the Ultimate Fighting Championship and then they look at you sideways like, what?

• 2:14:12Speaker 01

  That's, that's still though could be a conversation. Here's what I do on like a plane. I go, I work with computers and they're like, oh. That always shuts it down. Finance is too.

• 2:14:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but if I wanna have a conversation with someone, if I don't mind having a conversation with them, I just don't wanna explain the whole thing.

• 2:14:27Speaker 01

  I forget you do UFC commentary. That's another great job.

• 2:14:31Joe Rogan?

  That's a job. That's the only job. I have all the great jobs, but that's the only job I have. That's, that's an actual job where someone pays me. Like I show up, I work for somebody. I'm an employee and I have to, I sign up.

• 2:14:44Speaker 01

  Is there something you wanna do that you haven't done? Are you looking?

• 2:14:48Joe Rogan?

  No, I'm not looking to do anything.

• 2:14:49Speaker 01

  You have a goal?

• 2:14:49Joe Rogan?

  No, I have zero goals.

• 2:14:50Speaker 01

  Zero goal. What about retiring and traveling the world?

• 2:14:53Joe Rogan?

  Retirement ideas? No.

• 2:14:55Speaker 01

  Pyramids? You ever see those?

• 2:14:56Joe Rogan?

  I wanna see the pyramids.

• 2:14:57Speaker 01

  I do too, but I think what's gonna happen is you go, oh, there they are. And now you're like.

• 2:15:01Joe Rogan?

  I don't think so.

• 2:15:02Speaker 01

  Twenty hour.

• 2:15:03Joe Rogan?

  I've been obsessed with the pyramids since I was like a little boy.

• 2:15:05Speaker 01

  Can you go in them now at all?

• 2:15:06Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 2:15:06Speaker 01

  You can?

• 2:15:07Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you can go in them. And if I went, I'd hopefully be able to get someone to guide me, like a really good person.

• 2:15:13Speaker 01

  I could guide you.

• 2:15:15Joe Rogan?

  Could you do it as Caitlyn Jenner though?

• 2:15:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, baby. This is where the guy died.

• 2:15:19Joe Rogan?

  Imagine we filmed that?

• 2:15:20Speaker 01

  Yeah. He was buried with his dog.

• 2:15:22Joe Rogan?

  Have you seen this whole controversy that they think that there's like these enormous structures?

• 2:15:27Speaker 01

  This is.

• 2:15:28Joe Rogan?

  I don't know, but there's a guy named Jimmy. Corsetti, he has this great YouTube show called Bright Insight. He's been on my show many times, very smart guy and very reasonable guy. And also is a huge believer that there's a missing chapter in ancient history. He doesn't believe in it. He, he thinks it ignores something that everyone knows. There's this enormous water table that's underneath the pyramids. So the pyramids, there's water underneath the pyramids. And Mr. Beast, apparently on his YouTube thing that he did with the pyramids, went into the water. So they're all in the water, splashing around the water. So this water table, yeah. So underneath the pyramids, there's water that flows.

• 2:16:08Speaker 01

  That seems unstable to me in my engineering mind.

• 2:16:11Joe Rogan?

  To talk to you before they built that 5,000 years ago.

• 2:16:16Speaker 01

  Was it five, 10?

• 2:16:17Joe Rogan?

  It's probably more, it's probably a lot more. If I had to guess, I, I think they're wrong. I think the hieroglyphs that are on the wall that depict pharaohs leading back to 30,000 plus years is probably accurate.

• 2:16:29Speaker 01

  I really want to know how they built those. I really, I think that's a, those, you see some of those stones are so, I don't believe aliens or I don't believe that that happened. I think people built that. But how did they get some of those stones up there?

• 2:16:46Joe Rogan?

  This episode is brought to you by Armra. Every week there's some new wellness hack that people swear by. And after a while, you start thinking, why do we think we can just outsmart our bodies? That's why Armra colostrum caught my attention. It's something the body already recognizes and it has hundreds of these specialized nutrients for gut stuff, immunity, metabolism, et cetera. I first noticed it working around training, especially workout recovery. Most stuff falls off, but I am still taking this. If you want to try, Armra is offering my listeners 30% off. Go to Armra.com/Rogan. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Look, it's good to prepare for the future, but when you start over analyzing what's happening around you,

• 2:17:31Joe Rogan?

  dreaming up every hypothetical. ...situation of what could happen. That's when it gets dangerous. You can start to hyper fixate and stress out and all over things that haven't even happened. That's no good for current you or future you. If you're struggling to stay in the present and out of your head, try talking with a quality therapist from BetterHelp. They have psychologists, family therapists, marriage counselors, social workers, and more. Whatever you need to work through, BetterHelp can match you with a seasoned professional with the specialty that you need.

• 2:18:12Joe Rogan?

  BetterHelp is now a network with more than 125 health plans with many copays as low as $15 for eligible members. And if you don't have eligible insurance or live outside the US, you can still get 20% off your first month. Sign up and get 20% off at betterhelp.com. That's better H E L P dot com. Well, I was watching this guy. Here's the answer. I'll tell you who this guy is because shout out to him because he had a very interesting take on it. I watch a lot of these like silly YouTube videos that are all on like ancient history and ancient civilizations and stuff like that. But this one was really kind of interesting. Fat people falling down. And this guy is, I'll send it to you, Jamie.

• 2:18:57Joe Rogan?

  His name is Michael Button and he had a very good point. And his point is that there's this linear path between like cave person and what we are today. But he's saying, but, but human beings in the form that we exist in today have essentially been around for at least 315,000 years. And there's all these large rise, like peaks and dips.

• 2:19:25Joe Rogan?

  In the historical timeline of the temperature of the earth. And in these peaks of temperature, you have all this growth and change and then you have ice ages and you have drop offs and then there's cataclysms and natural disasters and he brings up the volcano eruption, the Toba volcano eruption. But what he's essentially saying is, human beings in this form, with the minds that we have, have existed for 300,000 years.

• 2:19:50Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 2:19:51Joe Rogan?

  With the capacity. But yet, only over the last few thousand years have we seen all this progress. And he thinks, what he's proposing is, if there was a super advanced civilization 100,000 years ago, there would be almost nothing left. So we're supposing that what we find is all that's ever been. What he's saying is, if you imagine 200,000 years of development of technology, of tools, of agriculture, all the different things that could have happened in those 200,000 years, that you could have had an insanely advanced society 200,000 years ago and then it gets completely wiped out.

• 2:20:33Joe Rogan?

  Then 115 to 150, depending on who you ask, thousand years later, you start seeing what we've seen in the last few hundred years.

• 2:20:42Speaker 01

  Okay, I'm gonna push back on that.

• 2:20:45Joe Rogan?

  Please do.

• 2:20:45Speaker 01

  Wouldn't we have, wouldn't they have some metal?

• 2:20:48Joe Rogan?

  No. All they would have, but this is what he's talking about. When you have enormous spans of time, all you have left is stone. You have rocks.

• 2:20:57Speaker 01

  Where's the steel go?

• 2:20:58Joe Rogan?

  Just disintegrates, it all goes away. It all just gets absorbed by the earth. Like, you know, there's very little metal that is gonna, like, any forge, like, if you have a knife and you leave that knife under the ground, just the earth will erode it, you know, a few thousand years, it's gone.

• 2:21:14Speaker 01

  Oh, so they probably had combustion engines and stuff?

• 2:21:18Joe Rogan?

  Here, look, steel takes probably 50 to 500 years to decompose. Depending on the type of environmental conditions, with stainless steel potentially taking over 1,000 years. So just imagine something that's 100,000 years old, you got nothing, there's nothing left. And he, so he makes this very interesting argument in this video that I'd never considered before. It's just the timeline of human beings being human beings. And he's like, what was it, why was there this great leap in technology? And it is completely possible that there was great leaps hundreds of thousands of years ago. But then the question is like, what happened to us? How did we get so far ahead of all these other creatures? How did we get so far ahead?

• 2:22:00Speaker 01

  I know, you talk about like, we're like this, this much smarter than a, the monkey. I mean-

• 2:22:05Joe Rogan?

  Oh, we have most genes, most, most of our genes are chimpanzee genes. Most of them.

• 2:22:10Speaker 01

  What are the things under the pyramids or pillars? What, what does that mean?

• 2:22:14Joe Rogan?

  I don't know what they're seeing. See, it's some, some sort of satellite, ground penetrating, is it a radar? A type of radar? Jamie? What are they calling it?

• 2:22:25Speaker 01

  Come on, Jamie, what are they calling it?

• 2:22:26Joe Rogan?

  So they, they have these images. He's, the problem is also these guys are Italian, so they're saying it in, in Italian. And so I don't know exactly what they're saying. I'm just reading the translation. I want to hear their voice. I want to hear if they sound wacky. "Everybody is talking in Italian, it sounds beautiful." But you could say nonsense shit with an Italian accent. It sounds incredible.

• 2:22:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:22:44Joe Rogan?

  Cause I don't speak Italian.

• 2:22:45Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:22:46Joe Rogan?

  You know?

• 2:22:46Speaker 01

  Beautiful language.

• 2:22:47Joe Rogan?

  Beautiful language. So, these images that show these feet, look, if it's real, and that stuff is under the water table, that's actually even fucking crazy.

• 2:22:56Speaker 01

  Why?

• 2:22:57Joe Rogan?

  Explain the collected acoustics from deep in the ground, including seismic waves, noise from human activity and photon interactions to map newly found shafts and chambers that extend more than 2,000 feet below the surface. Beyandi said these waves were collected by radar, specifically by analyzing Doppler, centroid, abnormal, abnormalities, shifts or distortions in frequency patterns used to detect underground structures or changes. However, Professor Lawrence Conyers, a radar expert at University of Denver, who specializes in archaeology and was not involved in the study, still raised doubts. He said, "Photon interactions, this is science fiction, and frequency shifts of what?" He said, "We now have three different energy sources moving around radar,

• 2:23:40Joe Rogan?

  electromagnetic, sound, seismic, and light photons. This is all gobbledygook." Sounds like he didn't get invited to the party. Hmm. I heard that guy's a furry.

• 2:23:50Speaker 01

  We're gonna-

• 2:23:51Joe Rogan?

  I made that up, I'm sorry, sir. Um, but, show me the images of what they, they believe that they've found. Cause this is, it's, if it is a real thing, if you really do have these, I mean, the 3D images, like, they really stepped out of line in drawing it so, I mean, so clearly.

• 2:24:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:24:07Joe Rogan?

  Like, that's not what you see. You're, you're honeydicking me.

• 2:24:10Speaker 01

  They gotta- Dig.

• 2:24:11Joe Rogan?

  But if it is under the water table, that's even crazier. So if they're using the water, if the pyramid, there's a guy named Christopher Dunn that believes that the pyramid is a gigantic electrical power plant.

• 2:24:23Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, like a Tesla coil kind of thing, and then the needles.

• 2:24:27Joe Rogan?

  So if they're using the water for energy and they actually have these columns that extend into the water, that's even crazier. That's an even more advanced civilization than just building these columns.

• 2:24:39Speaker 01

  Well, we gotta dig. Why don't we dig, start digging there, me and go over.

• 2:24:43Joe Rogan?

  Me and you.

• 2:24:43Speaker 01

  Get down there.

• 2:24:44Joe Rogan?

  How many shovels do you think we need? Should we be safe?

• 2:24:46Speaker 01

  Um, yeah, definitely.

• 2:24:48Joe Rogan?

  Get a couple extras.

• 2:24:49Speaker 01

  Four, for sure.

• 2:24:50Joe Rogan?

  Couple extras. Jamie's back goes out if he digs all day, though.

• 2:24:53Speaker 01

  Jamie's gotta, that golf swing's gonna hurt his back. I'm a little worried about that.

• 2:24:58Joe Rogan?

  That's a serious golf swing. You're a little jealous, right? You're a little jealous.

• 2:25:00Speaker 01

  It was like, I heard a nice pop.

• 2:25:01Joe Rogan?

  You're a little jealous. I felt it from you.

• 2:25:04Speaker 01

  A little jealous, definitely jealous of his equipment.

• 2:25:06Joe Rogan?

  You heard that whack and you're like, ooh, that's going far.

• 2:25:10Speaker 01

  What's your handicap, Jamie? I think people want to know.

• 2:25:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, what was yours when you were playing all the time?

• 2:25:15Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's a, he diverted you.

• 2:25:17Speaker 01

  I won the.

• 2:25:17Joe Rogan?

  Turned the question around like you.

• 2:25:18Speaker 01

  I know.

• 2:25:19Speaker 03

  I don't want to be judged by a guy that's really good.

• 2:25:21Speaker 01

  First of all, this is not, I know it seems like I bragged a lot on this show, but this is a fact. I was the Ashbrook Valley Country Club Junior Golf Champion.

• 2:25:28Speaker 03

  Oof, so you're probably three or four when you were there, maybe better even?

• 2:25:32Speaker 01

  No, there was not, I think there was like five kids in that country.

• 2:25:36Joe Rogan?

  What's your handicap?

• 2:25:38Speaker 01

  Now, I'll shoot like a 95. I was probably like 80 when I was a kid.

• 2:25:45Speaker 03

  So that's like eight-ish, seven or eight.

• 2:25:48Speaker 01

  Eighty-five.

• 2:25:49Speaker 03

  Maybe 10?

• 2:25:50Joe Rogan?

  10 handicap? Is that good, Jamie?

• 2:25:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's really good.

• 2:25:53Joe Rogan?

  What's yours?

• 2:25:54Speaker 01

  I would.

• 2:25:54Speaker 03

  Probably it's 20.

• 2:25:55Joe Rogan?

  20. Jamie's got a line drive that'll fuck you up, though.

• 2:25:59Speaker 01

  No, I know. I heard a whack in that room.

• 2:26:01Joe Rogan?

  What's the furthest you've ever driven the ball? Ball Jamie.

• 2:26:04Speaker 03

  Uh, I said that wind conditions come into play there, Joe.

• 2:26:07Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:26:07Speaker 01

  No, no, no, no.

• 2:26:08Speaker 03

  I go for ball. I'm going for ball speed right now, I think, and I've gotten over 160 before.

• 2:26:13Speaker 01

  Damn.

• 2:26:13Speaker 03

  But that's only like one part of the equation.

• 2:26:16Speaker 01

  Jamie's ever.

• 2:26:16Joe Rogan?

  Is that world class?

• 2:26:17Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:26:18Speaker 03

  It's pretty high.

• 2:26:19Joe Rogan?

  That's fast as fuck. Hundred and sixty miles an hour? That's crazy.

• 2:26:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, there's stats with golf, like, most people who play golf don't break a hundred, so like, you're already in the top five, ten percent or something.

• 2:26:27Joe Rogan?

  Wow. But that's what you're obsessed with, right?

• 2:26:30Speaker 03

  Sure, I was just trying to beat my friends, really.

• 2:26:34Speaker 03

  I just got.

• 2:26:35Speaker 01

  You play for money? Golf's fun with money.

• 2:26:37Speaker 03

  I mean, if I go with most people here, they're only playing for money, so.

• 2:26:40Speaker 01

  Oh, so fun.

• 2:26:41Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I can't, I can't get addicted to that game.

• 2:26:43Speaker 01

  You never, you, you just didn't like golf?

• 2:26:45Joe Rogan?

  No, I never played it.

• 2:26:46Speaker 01

  You've never tried it?

• 2:26:47Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 2:26:47Speaker 01

  What do you, what do you mean?

• 2:26:48Joe Rogan?

  I never played it.

• 2:26:49Speaker 01

  How could you not even try it?

• 2:26:51Joe Rogan?

  Cause I'm scared of games. I, I get addicted to games. I don't have any time. I have my life in a good.

• 2:26:55Speaker 01

  You're scared of games, this is a big thing you're admitting now.

• 2:26:56Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, for real. No, legitimately.

• 2:26:59Speaker 01

  About chess, you play chess? I love chess.

• 2:27:00Joe Rogan?

  No, that's the, the same thing. I know I'd get addicted.

• 2:27:01Speaker 01

  No one will play with me.

• 2:27:03Joe Rogan?

  Are you that good? Cause you're on the spectrum. Probably really good at it.

• 2:27:05Speaker 01

  I, I, that, lately I've been playing a lot online, I play, but it's like, I wanna play.

• 2:27:09Joe Rogan?

  Come to the mothership. Tony plays all the time.

• 2:27:11Speaker 01

  He does?

• 2:27:12Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, Tony and Brian Simpson, they play all the time. Tony's pretty good.

• 2:27:14Speaker 01

  Oh, I'd love to play.

• 2:27:15Joe Rogan?

  Tony's a smart fucker.

• 2:27:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:27:17Joe Rogan?

  He's a smart fucker. He's good, he's good at chess. He's probably a little spectrum, me himself.

• 2:27:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, we're all spectrum.

• 2:27:21Joe Rogan?

  Little bit, little bit.

• 2:27:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, to be that quick with, uh.

• 2:27:24Joe Rogan?

  But I feel about chess the same way I feel. Chess maybe even more so, cause I could play on my computer anytime I want. I can't do that. I can't have that in my life.

• 2:27:33Speaker 01

  Why not? I mean, listen, you could, golf is such a great.

• 2:27:38Joe Rogan?

  Listen, I know I would love it. Everyone, Ron White loves it, Jamie loves it, Tony loves it, they love it. Tony just started playing when he moved to Austin. He fucking loves golf.

• 2:27:47Speaker 01

  I fucking love golf. I don't play much at all, but you're just afraid that you're gonna get too into it. That's what it sounds like.

• 2:27:54Joe Rogan?

  Oh, a hundred percent, yeah. I don't, I have like a little switch that goes off and then I become obsessed with things.

• 2:28:00Speaker 01

  That's, that's how you get stuff done.

• 2:28:01Joe Rogan?

  It used to be, it was, well, it's, most of, it's a game right now that I have it with, it's pool. I play pool pretty well.

• 2:28:06Speaker 01

  I played, you don't remember this, but I played pool with you at your old studio and I don't think I hit any balls. I think you just went and you played pool.

• 2:28:16Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, just run out.

• 2:28:17Speaker 01

  And you're just like, we're done.

• 2:28:20Speaker 01

  You're like, game's over. I was like, oh, that was fun.

• 2:28:22Joe Rogan?

  That's the fucked up thing about pool. If a guy breaks first, he could just break and run out.

• 2:28:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:28:27Joe Rogan?

  Ten racks in a row.

• 2:28:27Speaker 01

  It was pretty rude of you. I was a guest.

• 2:28:29Joe Rogan?

  I'm rude. With that, with pool, I won't let anybody win.

• 2:28:32Speaker 01

  You had like two balls left. I had all my balls, nothing. You could have been like, here, you know, just miss a little bit, let me go.

• 2:28:39Joe Rogan?

  You don't want that in your life.

• 2:28:40Speaker 01

  No, I do. That's all. When I was younger, I didn't want.

• 2:28:43Joe Rogan?

  You should have a boxing match like that old guy had.

• 2:28:47Speaker 01

  I've hit my head too many times.

• 2:28:49Joe Rogan?

  Take a beating. That guy didn't have any fear that he was gonna get punched back. Did you notice?

• 2:28:54Speaker 01

  That was way, it was like poorly rigged.

• 2:28:57Joe Rogan?

  There's some good fake fights online. There's this one guy, he was a politician in Mexico, and he got like fake muscles. So he had like, those fake muscles, and then he had a fake fight with the fake muscles. And it's like a super obvious fake fight. You watch it like, what the fuck am I looking at? This is nuts.

• 2:29:14Speaker 01

  And he had that giant bicep. It was so bad.

• 2:29:16Joe Rogan?

  Bulging, like, they're oil. They shove oil into their skin. And it makes your, like, how does that, how bad does that feel?

• 2:29:24Speaker 01

  And they forget to do their legs. They just look so weird. You gotta balance that out.

• 2:29:30Joe Rogan?

  Well, people get their legs oiled up too.

• 2:29:32Speaker 01

  I'm gonna get oiled up and I'm gonna get huge. I'm gonna do jiu-jitsu. The whole, my life, from here on in, my life is gonna change.

• 2:29:38Joe Rogan?

  This is a good place to do that. Then you need to move here. A lot of jiu-jitsu here too.

• 2:29:41Speaker 01

  I'm gonna be out here a lot, I think. I really do think I will be out here a lot.

• 2:29:44Joe Rogan?

  Dude, we could use you out here.

• 2:29:46Speaker 01

  I'm out here like four times in the past three months.

• 2:29:48Joe Rogan?

  I know. That's what I'm saying. Just get a fucking place.

• 2:29:50Speaker 01

  No one loves me in New York.

• 2:29:52Joe Rogan?

  I know.

• 2:29:53Speaker 01

  No one loves me.

• 2:29:53Joe Rogan?

  That's, we love you here.

• 2:29:54Speaker 01

  I mean, I do, I do feel more welcomed here. So yeah, there's golf. Golf can get me out here. If Tony plays golf.

• 2:30:03Joe Rogan?

  Oh, they all play golf. Everybody plays golf out here.

• 2:30:06Speaker 01

  Alright.

• 2:30:07Joe Rogan?

  You're in.

• 2:30:09Speaker 01

  I have to go to the bathroom so bad.

• 2:30:10Joe Rogan?

  Let's wrap this bitch up.

• 2:30:11Speaker 01

  Let's wrap this up. I can't concentrate.

• 2:30:15Joe Rogan?

  I can see it in your face.

• 2:30:16Speaker 01

  I have to pee so bad.

• 2:30:17Joe Rogan?

  I know it's the worst. You can't form sentences. Okay, we'll wrap it up. Tell everybody how they can find you.

• 2:30:22Speaker 01

  Get my crypto coin at Kyle. No, kildonigan.com. I'm on tour, Boston, Vermont, Philly, Vegas.

• 2:30:30Joe Rogan?

  And Instagram, there it is, Live Dates.

• 2:30:32Speaker 01

  Hold on, again, that's with that?

• 2:30:34Joe Rogan?

  Join the mailing list.

• 2:30:34Speaker 01

  That's your, um...

• 2:30:35Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's my flamethrower. That's Elon's Not a Flamethrower.

• 2:30:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:30:39Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Okay, um, and your Instagram is?

• 2:30:44Speaker 01

  Kyle, Instagram is Kyle Dunnigan1.

• 2:30:46Joe Rogan?

  And you may or may not be the star of Monday Night's Kill Tony.

• 2:30:49Speaker 01

  May or may not, you don't know.

• 2:30:51Joe Rogan?

  Ladies and gentlemen, Kyle Dunnigan.

• 2:30:52Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 2:30:53Joe Rogan?

  Thank you, brother. That was fun. Bye, everybody.