Patrick Bet David ON: Mental Discipline, Entrepreneurship & Big Picture Thinking

Are you an entrepreneur or have dreams of being one? Do you crave mental discipline that will set you apart from others? In this ON Purpose episode, Jay Shetty sits down with Patrick Bet David to share how you can take your life from the ordinary to extraordinary by practicing mental discipline and big-picture thinking. Tune in to hear how to overcome the fear of the unknown and apply Bet David’s “Next Five Moves” strategy to launch you toward success. - Text Jay Shetty: 310-997-4177 Train your mind for peace and purpose everyday. Grab a copy of Think Like A Monk, or listen to the audiobook now! Book: https://books.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewFeature?id=1532264534&mt=11&ls=1&itscg=80048&itsct=js_httlam_book Audiobook: https://books.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewFeature?id=1532264062&mt=3&ls=1&itscg=80048&itsct=js_httlam_audiobook See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by AG1. Are you feeling September reset too? Shorter days, longer to-do lists, earlier alarms, all those routines you promised yourself you'd pick back up. It can feel like your whole life is recalibrating. And when everything around you is changing, it helps to have a few things you can rely on. AG1 Next Gen is one of those easy habits to keep. It's the clinically-backed, comprehensive daily health drink that supports your gut health, energy production, and foundational nutrition all in one scoop. AG1's ingredients are sourced from quality partners for absorption, potency, and nutrient density to deliver the foundational nutrition your body needs. And alongside a proper diet,

• 0:44Jay Shetty?

  AG1 Next Gen meets 94% of nutrient requirements and it's clinically shown to enrich the gut microbiome. For a limited time, save 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro at drinkag1.com/onpurpose. That's drinkag1.com/onpurpose. This episode is brought to you by Vinted. Value can be found anywhere, even in the clothes sitting untouched in our closets. That's where Vinted comes in. Vinted is a secondhand marketplace app where you can sell clothes you no longer want and get more value out of them. Whether you're running out of space, moving, or simply updating your wardrobe. Listing items is a quick and simple process, and once something sells,

• 1:30Jay Shetty?

  Vinted creates a prepaid shipping label for you. And the best part, there are no seller fees, so you keep what you earn. It's a simple way to clear out your closet, be less wasteful, and maybe make some extra money along the way. And if you've been thinking about a wardrobe refresh, this can make it feel a little more worthwhile. You're not just letting go of clothes, you're getting more value from what you already have. Give your clothes a second life with Vinted. Download the Vinted app for free to start selling with no seller fees, so you keep every dollar you earn. This episode is brought to you by AG1. Are you feeling September reset too? Shorter days, longer to-do lists, earlier alarms, all those routines you promised yourself you'd pick back up. It can feel like your whole life is recalibrating.

• 2:16Jay Shetty?

  And when everything around you is changing, it helps to have a few things you can rely on. AG1 Next Gen is one of those easy habits to keep. It's the clinically backed, comprehensive daily health drink that supports your gut health, energy production, and foundational nutrition all in one scoop. AG1's ingredients are sourced from quality partners for absorption, potency, and nutrient density to deliver the foundational nutrition your body needs. And alongside a proper diet, AG1 Next Gen meets 94% of nutrient requirements and is clinically shown to enrich the gut microbiome. For a limited time, save 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1

• 2:59Jay Shetty?

  Pro at drinkag1.com/onpurpose. That's drinkag1.com/onpurpose.

• 3:10Speaker 01

  The biggest thing is to go through the question. I have a set of questions that I went through years ago and I put 28 of them in the book here to find out exactly who you are, to find out like questions such as, okay Jay, who do you get along with? And you write down, these are the people I get along with. Then you write down, who do you not get along with? You know, what kind of a question is that? Well, why don't you get along with those types of people? Then you say, you know, I don't get along with those three guys because they're just like me. Well, maybe you gotta kind of like yourself. You got some things you gotta like about yourself. So when you go through that part, then comes a second step. So number one is master knowing yourself.

• 3:46Speaker 02

  Hey everyone, welcome back to On Purpose, the number one health and wellness podcast in the world. And I am so grateful today because I get to sit down virtually with someone that I've been following for a long, long time. You've probably seen his content. He's interviewed some incredible people himself and has so much of his own wisdom, insight, and strategies to share with each and every single one of us. This is truly a collaboration. I hope a lot of you are going to be excited to see us both together. I wish we were in the same room, but knowing his energy, he's going to speak straight through the camera. It is none other than Patrick "Bet" David, who went from escaping war torn Iran to founding his own financial services firm, raising tens of millions of dollars.

• 4:31Speaker 02

  And creating value tainment, one of the leading YouTube channels for entrepreneurs. Now, his unorthodox approach to business as well as life has led to compelling interviews with Ray Dalio, Kevin Hart, the late Kobe Bryant, President George Bush, and a host of other leaders. His content on social media has been viewed over one billion times. Patrick never obtained a college degree and went from the army to selling health club memberships before entering the field of financial services. At age thirty, he founded PHP, a financial services agency, and now he lives in Dallas with his wife and three children. He's here today to blow you away with his strategic approach to business and life,

• 5:15Speaker 02

  which is beautifully presented in his new book, Your Next Five Moves: Master the Art of Business Strategy. Welcome to the show, Patrick Bet-David. Patrick, thank you for doing this, man.

• 5:26Speaker 01

  Brother, thanks for having me on. Yes, this is good. It's been a while. We've been going back and forth, but it's good to finally connect.

• 5:31Speaker 02

  Absolutely. I was actually hoping I'd get to fly out to Dallas to meet you. And then the pandemic, so I'm glad that we figured out a way and now we'll, we'll, we'll already know each other now. Next time we see each other.

• 5:41Speaker 01

  I look forward to it. I look forward to it.

• 5:43Speaker 02

  And, and your, your content's incredible, man. You, you provide so much value through your work. And when I started researching into you, I started realizing that your content is actually just one part of this whole empire you've built. And, and I just started to get so much more fascinated with you and your work and life. And I'm excited that people are going to get to hear about that today. So, one of the first questions I wanted to ask you, uh, because I've seen this in your videos and I get fascinated because I'm, I'm massively into visualization of being surrounded by inspiration. Tell us about the significance behind your dead mentor's painting in your office. Because that we see in all the videos and I also see the, uh, the Marvel characters too.

• 6:25Speaker 02

  And I'm just like, dude, like, it looks like you've got like Universal Studios in your house. I love it.

• 6:31Speaker 01

  You know, it's funny you say that. It's right over you to the side. I don't even know if you can see it or not. It's all the way over there. So it's the office turned into studio. So you know, the painting to me is eight characters that mean a lot to me. Einstein is obviously one of the most brilliant minds out there and have a big statue of Einstein in my house. And Einstein's philosophy on math is slightly different than Milton Friedman, who was a famous economist, capitalist, but they kind of debate, they clash a little bit. And you have Kennedy and Lincoln and they clash a little bit. Then they're both presidents. You got Tupac and MLK, they clash a little bit, you know, so and then you have the Shah of Iran, which is, you know, the Shah was there when I was born in Iran, three months before he was in exile.

• 7:13Speaker 01

  And then Senna, which in my opinion is the greatest Formula One race car driver, and I named my daughter after his last name, Senna. So my daughter's name is Senna David, after his last name. And then they're sitting, they're debating two books. One book is one form of economy. The other book is another form of economy. So they're debating Atlas Shrugged and Communist Manifesto, which Jay, it's kind of like the complete opposite of religions in economy. And then, you know, they're just having that kind of a conversation in a bank vault. And then the three characters there with the Hulk and Batman and Joker is an element of my personality. You have a little bit of all three of them. And then at the front, I also have Captain America, not Captain America,

• 7:57Speaker 01

  Optimus Prime, he's 93, 1400 pounds, and it was custom made in Malaysia. We brought it in. I said, I gotta have it. So those are some of the things that I have in my office here.

• 8:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean, that already tells us so much about you and how your mind works. And we share a lot of people in common. So on this wall and my other podcast wall, which I'd love to see when you come to LA, we have Einstein, MLK, I have Muhammad Ali on this wall. I have Tupac on my wall, too. I also have some of Nikola Tesla's first ever patents of his motors. But what I love about what you just shared there is this embracing of paradoxes, like opposites. And I'm someone who gets fascinated by that, too. Like, what is, why do you find paradoxes and opposites and ideas that seemingly collide so fascinating, like you have in that painting you're describing?

• 8:47Speaker 01

  You know, it's crazy. When I was a kid growing up, I watched Rocky IV. And when you watch Rocky IV in Iran... When you watch Rocky IV in Iran with Persian dialect, because it was all, you know, you watch some of the movies, whether it's whatever dialect it is, and you're in Iran watching it in Farsi. Sly sounds different, but when you watch the movie, at that time, the, you know, tensions in America and Russia was very high. I mean, a lot higher than what it is today with Russia. Today, Russia's been replaced by China, but back in the days, it was really Russia and US going at it, right? And you saw him going to Russia to fight Drago, who killed his best friend. And then at the end, he says a message. He says, "If I can change, if you can change, if he can change, anybody can change."

• 9:31Speaker 01

  I mean, I just got the chills all over my body thinking about this message. And then in my family, my parents, my father was an imperialist, and my mother was a communist. I mean, complete different philosophy when it comes on to politics. And I watched them go at it all the time. So it always came down to Republicans think Democrats have no clue what they're talking about. Democrats think Republicans have no clue what they're talking about. I have friends on both sides that are brilliant, and I always want to know, "How did you come to your conclusion of your views? How did you come to your conclusion of your views?" And there's truth on both sides, and there's a lot to be learned on both sides. So for me, you know, the reason why I look at it from that standpoint is you look at America today, we're pretty divided. Sometimes, just because somebody else is a different color or a different background or a different age

• 10:15Speaker 01

  or a different religion or a different political affiliation, we probably have a few thousand things in common and maybe 11 things that are not in common. If we focus on more of the things that we have in common, we'll figure out a way to bring people together. So this is one of the reasons why I love a healthy debate. I love watching debates. Like, for me, you know, people like to fight, you know, maybe watch a UFC fight or a box. I like to watch a good debate on YouTube. That's what I enjoy. That's entertainment for me. That's why these two topics always sit down together. It kind of fascinating to me.

• 10:48Speaker 02

  Yeah, what a great answer, man. Really, really refreshing to hear that. What's something, what's something that you've been debating with a friend or your family or your wife recently? Like, what's been a discussion or debate? It doesn't need to be serious, it could be anything.

• 11:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, I mean, look, friendly stuff. I have a friend of mine, his name is Steve. Let me tell you, Steve and I, we go back. He was the Michael Jordan of our high school. Okay, so this guy holds all the records. And he was the guy that we would, I would bring my dad just to watch this guy play. He was fascinating. Now, if he and I can go anywhere, we can be in, you know, Madrid, Colombia, you're anywhere we can be. There's gonna be a moment where we debate the greatest basketball player of all time. And we can go for five hours, just say heated, people think we hate each other, we're screaming, you're out of your mind, you're crazy. And it's just exciting, you know, he says he's a LeBron guy and secretly he likes to say Jordan, but he's really a LeBron guy and I'm going back with data and I'm giving him data, but it's not about data.

• 11:42Speaker 01

  And then he comes up and he says, you never played organized basketball. I play with the highest level. Guys, you don't really understand basketball, but it's so entertaining. I'm like, we have two of our friends who just sit there and they just enjoy it, you know, and then you can talk about debates about what's the greatest game, you know, what's the greatest leader of all time. I mean, it could be anything. When I was a kid, we would come down from Chevy Chase, when I lived in Glendale, we would come down from Doran, because I went to Wilson Junior High School, and we would walk all the way down and I lived off of Broadway, right by the post office. It was a good 20-minute drive, 20-minute walk. That 20-minute walk when we would go, my friends, we would talk about things. We would say, hey Jay, let me ask you this. You could be the most powerful person in the world, president, you could be the richest man in the world,

• 12:27Speaker 01

  you could be the person that is the most spiritual leader, that's from whatever church you choose, a Billy Graham-esque type of a person, a Chopra type, somebody that has that kind of a stature. You can be the greatest athlete, the greatest performer, so Michael Jackson, Michael Jordan, president, all this stuff. Who would you choose? And then people would say, I would choose this. And that would lead to dialogue, why wouldn't you want to be the billionaire? Why wouldn't you want to be the president? I wouldn't want, I wouldn't want to be the person that makes an impact. Who cares about making an impact? You want to, it was exciting and you're learning so much. And I think, you know, more today, if we had more people from opposing sides debating topics, we would learn so much rather than just one-sided message being given to us.

• 13:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, what a great answer, man. And don't you feel, and I'm hearing this from you, that... It sounds like when you're debating with your friend or we're having these discussions, these debates are on when they're on, but then when you're off, you go back to being friends again. And there's this mutual respect and understanding. And, you know, when I, I remember being part of my school's debate team and, and I, I really enjoyed it back then. So I was, I was big into it back then, not so much anymore. But what I found is that the way we were trained was you could only debate when you knew both sides fully. So you couldn't debate just understanding your side. Like you had to understand the opposing side. So if I was debating with you on this movie versus that movie,

• 13:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 13:51Speaker 02

  I should have had to have watched and analyzed both movies. I can't simply argue it on the basis of my knowledge of my, uh, my, you know, my moment.

• 13:59Speaker 01

  Powerful.

• 14:00Speaker 02

  As you'd call it. And I, and I just think that, I think that's what you're, you're raising. Like when I'm hearing you, I'm like, yeah, what, what Patrick's really saying is that healthy debate is needed when, when you're able to do it in a mutually respectful way. But sometimes the debates we watch today are just so like low boiling and, you know, then they're not respectful. I, I don't know if that's the right word, but that's the word that's kind of come to the top of my mind that, you know, debates are ones where you have complete respect for the person you're speaking to. It's not, it's not like a rap battle where you're demeaning them, you know? It's, it's not putting them down because debate isn't about putting the other person down.

• 14:37Speaker 01

  Uh, you made, but what school was this Jay? What, what school did you go to?

• 14:40Speaker 02

  I went to a school in London called Queen Elizabeth's Boys Schools. It was a, it was a grammar school. It wasn't paid for, but it was, uh, it was, yeah, it was, it was a good school.

• 14:47Speaker 01

  That's powerful. I mean, I love that idea, which you, you know, it's interesting. It remind me, uh, me of something because I, I sat down with the Bush family and I sat down with RFK because I'm always curious about the Kennedy family. How do you build a legacy like that where so many people? And Robert F. Kennedy, Robert Kennedy Jr., the son of Robert Kennedy who was running, he said, uh, I said, how was it like being a Kennedy? And he says, you know, it's crazy. Every night, uh, we had to debate a topic. And our dad would sit us down and he would say, so what do you think about? You know, fascist, what do you think about Germany? What do you think about what's going on here with? What do you think about this? Do you think war is good? Tell me about drugs. Why shouldn't we use drugs? I said, your dad would ask you these questions? He says, yes. He says, because every night at the dinner table, he wanted us kids to debate each other.

• 15:33Speaker 01

  And that was a Kennedy thing. That was a Kennedy thing. I remember one time Arnold told the story. Saying when he met the John F. Kennedy, he asked John F. Kennedy, what's your favorite color? And John F. Kennedy said, we like red. And Arnold's like, what do you mean? He says, what is your favorite color? And he says, we like red. What, what? I don't understand what this means. It's just, we are a tight knit of Kennedys and we back each other up, right? And on the Bush side, it's the same thing as well. The, uh, the father, all the way back grandfather Prescott, which is senior's father, similar situation, which is a healthy debate. So, you know, when you said the only way you can debate another topic is to sit down and actually uh, uh, know more about the other side. So you have the moral authority to debate a topic. I think that is a brilliant point you just made right there.

• 16:17Speaker 01

  And the other part I would say is the following. You know how in boxing, if you go under the belt, they take a point away. You know, if you go a certain side, what if they had a point system? You know how they? I don't know if you're a basketball guy, if you watch the NBA a lot, if you watch the NBA All-Star this year, do you remember the fourth quarter? How deep, how great of a fourth quarter was? I don't know if you watched the fourth quarter. Jay, it was the greatest quarter of basketball I've seen in my lifetime. And I've watched a lot of that. And here's why. They changed the guidelines because All-Star always had a black eye because nobody would watch the All-Star game because no one played defense. Just like, well, you know, you go score and you go score and do whatever you do. They changed the format and it was.

• 17:00Speaker 01

  Here's who gets to 155 first. So it wasn't like who wins by 19 points. So they took the clock off and they said whoever gets to 155 wins. All of a sudden you saw LeBron playing the kind of defense you've never seen before. Giannis playing defense you've never seen before. And it changes. So you bring up a good point to know that maybe we need to, we need to change the format of the debates and have a scoring system behind it. I don't know. I think there's a way of improving this thing because the way it's going right now. This is not how debates were years ago. Today, when you look at debates and it's getting uglier and uglier and uglier. And it's almost as if everybody feels they need to do that to advance. Because if they don't and you don't take a shot first and you gotta take the shot. So I don't know.

• 17:44Speaker 01

  If we debate issues, I really like to approach your taking. But for me, I just feel like when it comes down to issues, I, I really think we need more debates. Uh, I do think we need more people that are on both sides that are willing to be open to the other side's decision. Hey, here's how I feel the way I do. Why do you feel the way you do? Like a lot of times when I'm interviewing guys, I'll say, what brought you to this point? So I'm interviewing, uh, uh, Joe Arpaio, who's one of the haters guy in Arizona sheriff. You know, I'm sitting, I'm like, how did you become the way you are? Why are you such a nag? Like you want, you act like you like being an asshole. Why are you this way? What happened in your family? And then you go back and you go back and you go back. Then he told the story, then he's like, no wonder this makes sense. Of course a person like that has to be this way because you went through a moment where

• 18:28Speaker 01

  you were bullied and you had to almost stand up. And it happened so many times that you lost trust in somebody and you felt like this was the only thing. So we have to kind of look at all those things combined together. But it'd be great to go to a different format of debating. I think a lot more people would learn more about the topics we're dealing with today.

• 18:45Jay Shetty?

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• 18:58Jay Shetty?

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• 19:43Jay Shetty?

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• 20:26Jay Shetty?

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• 20:59Speaker 02

  This is a fascinating conversation already because I wasn't expecting to go here at all. So I'm really glad that we've gone down this because I think the point is that for so many of us, we were actually scared of debate because we see it as a negative thing. Like we see debates as like challenging, conflict, you know, full of like, and so because we made debate that way, it's now something that people should, you know, hide away from and try and avoid. But if we can find a way where we can all start entertaining ideas that we may not accept yet and processing it, there's a lot of value in that. And I'm glad that you've kind of brought that value out of it for us and kind of pushed that because yeah, it's definitely needed more of.

• 21:40Speaker 02

  But I mean, when you talk about that, where you are now, what I find interesting just listening to you is, and this is how I feel when I watch your videos and I've been really watching you during the pandemic and I think you've made some incredible points. You have this ability where you like to really analyze things and you like to look at it from lots of different perspectives. And it's kind of like how, what you were just saying now, if you watched, and by the way, I'm a huge Rocky fan too. So if you watched just one fight of the Rocky movie, let's say number three with Mr. T, and you watched the first fight where Rocky loses, and you only see that fight, you now have no context of anything else apart from Rocky just lost.

• 22:22Speaker 02

  And that's sometimes how we approach life, that if you look at things through just one lens or one snapshot, you don't get the bigger picture. And so I want to ask you, when you were in debt, when you were in that snapshot of your life, what were you analyzing that helped you move out of that position? Because I think a lot of people listening or watching right now, maybe experiencing debt, maybe experiencing financial challenges. How did you analyze that situation or did you analyze it all?

• 22:51Speaker 01

  When I was at my lowest point, is that what you're... Okay, yeah, so you know, it's a good question because it is December 31st of 2002, okay? I'm in my Ford Focus with a buddy of mine, Tony. We're at Laurel Canyon, right behind Universal Studios. We're listening to Ryan Seacrest do his countdown. We're across the street from that In-N-Out, if you know what I'm talking about. There's an In-N-Out, I'm parked right across on an uphill like this. And we're sitting there and I hear Ryan Seacrest go ten, nine on, you know, one oh two point seven, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one. And typically, I would be in Vegas. Typically, I would be in Vegas or a party or a nightclub or, you know, oh my gosh, you know, and then you're dancing,

• 23:33Speaker 01

  you're doing what you're doing. And it's exciting when it's a New Year. Jay, was the first time when New Year happened and I'm just sitting there, I'm not excited about anything. It's kind of like, so what? We're going into two thousand and three. Nothing's changed. Life's the same. Why would I be excited about this? We just bought in and out. We split it with our hands. We bought water and bought lemon on the side and squeezed it with sweeteners to make lemon. I'm just sitting there saying, let me get this straight. You are twenty-three years old, twenty-four years old at the time. You have some gifts, you have some talents, your dad's in and out of the hospital, your mom went back to Iran because you ran out of money. And you're partying here. What do you want to do about this?

• 24:15Speaker 01

  I mean, you have a few choices right now. You're in that forty-nine thousand dollars. You can go back in the army. And it's kind of like, you know what? I quit, I'm going back. I was in the army, I got out. Didn't work out, I'm gonna go back and be a soldier. You can go back and work at another gym as a gym salesman, because that's what I was doing. And then I kind of started looking at everything and I said, you know what? I went through every single one of my alternatives and this is the decision I made. I said, I'm either going for everything, or I'm gonna lose everything I have. And I didn't have anything to lose at the time, but I'm not willing to settle for a regular life because it doesn't excite me. If these other guys can do it, you know, it's always a statistic. When you look at today in America, I was doing a talk

• 24:57Speaker 01

  and I was on a tour and I got up and I asked a simple question. I said, let me ask you guys a question. I said, how many guys would like to one day live in a million dollar home? And oh, would love to have a million dollar. I said, how many million dollar homes do you think there are in America? Jay, I wish you would have heard the answers. Two thousand. Twenty-two thousand, thirty thousand, and they're giving me all these numbers. I said, you know, there's a million, million, million dollar homes in America. They said, what? I said, there's a million, million dollar homes in America. So I said, I would have never guessed there's a million, million dollar. I said, let me ask you, how many friends do you have that have walked up Mount Everest? And they say, no one. I said, okay, so can we say that climbing Mount Everest is what?

• 25:41Speaker 01

  We can, you can say, maybe it's impossible, maybe you and I cannot do it. Okay, fine, we can make the argument, I'm sixty-two years old, there's no way I can walk up Mount Everest. Fine, that's fine. But maybe eighty people have climbed Mount Everest. But there's a million, million dollar homes, what's the big deal about it? So it's not a big deal to think it's that, that big of a deal. I, I was talking to an economist from Harvard. And I said, how many people last year? Because he was saying the fact that it's so tough in America to become rich. I said, how many people in America last year do you think filed their taxes? That they made over a million dollars? Last year, how many people filed taxes in twenty nineteen that they netted over a million dollars? And he gives all these small numbers. I said, over five hundred thousand people in America last year made, that's a lot of people.

• 26:26Speaker 01

  You're not part of a small community, by the way, it's like, hey, I'm one of five hundred thousand. Nobody says like, you're not a big deal if you're part of five hundred thousand, you know? You want to be one of the billion, one in five hundred thousand that made a million dollars. So when I started breaking down these types of things in my mind. And I said, if these other guys can do it, what is so special about that guy? What is so special about her? What is so, and I really started questioning. And the more closer I got to people that were very successful. I just realized, these guys have a higher pain tolerance than I do at the time. And I started asking myself, do you really want to go through the pain? The moment I started seeing the human side of other people that were winning. I said, I'm all in, I want to be able to go out there and pull it up. Because I'm willing to put up with the pain that I gotta go through. And it's just a matter of time.

• 27:09Speaker 01

  And then obviously, eventually, great things started happening. But in that moment, Jay, it's so close to go either direction. You can either just say, I settle, I'm just gonna go live a regular life. Or you're willing to go live that life. It's so unique, how close everybody is to, to each, it's, if I sit there and I measure it. When people say, oh, my gosh, Pat, look at your life, I'm like, I wish you knew how close I was to go back in the army and do twenty years. I would have retired three years ago, you would have never known who I was. It's this close, and most people don't realize that, but it's very close.

• 27:46Speaker 03

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• 27:49Speaker 04

  On October 2nd.

• 27:51Speaker 03

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• 27:55Speaker 04

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• 28:03Speaker 05

  What would happen if I stopped doing it? You're stalled, you're freezing there, that's what.

• 28:07Speaker 04

  With great power comes great deniability.

• 28:10Speaker 05

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• 28:11Speaker 04

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• 28:16Speaker 06

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• 28:47Speaker 07

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• 29:16Speaker 02

  I love that answer, especially when you're talking about the human flaws that everyone has and that you see that, because I think you're so right that we often put success, or fame, or power on this pedestal that we feel like, oh, like, that's not actually real. But you're right, like, everyone has their bad habits, their weaknesses, their flaws. And I love that you said that was your motivation, because I think that's such a refreshing thing. I've never heard that before. And the second thing that I love that you said is you're so right. Like, if you were in my shoes at that point, you would realize how close I was, because right now, it's easy to look at Patrick Beddavid, you know, the bestseller, and all the views, and all the interviews, and be like, oh, yeah, yeah, you already had it together.

• 30:00Speaker 02

  And that's what I'm interested by, that you were saying that you could have gone to the army. Did you gain a lot of, do you think you gained a lot of mental discipline from the army? Or what was the habits that you did gain from the army that you think really have stood the test of time in who you are today?

• 30:15Speaker 01

  There's no question about it. You know, in the personality types, you have the S's, the T's, the A's and the R's. The S's are the structured, organized system, strategy, they're all about like structured. The T's are very analytical, they're analyzing everything, data, numbers. The A's are, let's go get them, let's go beat these guys, I'm gonna take over the world. And the R's are all about harmony, relationship, empathy, understanding. In that moment of my life, pre-army, I was A and that's it. That's all, that was it for me. I was an A guy, bodybuilder, you know, I wanna be Mr. Olympia, partying, women. It's the only thing that was a priority for me. So then, uh, I'm at my sister's place, I lost my, one of my cars, uh, and I'm at my sister's

• 31:00Speaker 01

  place, they stole my car, I'm at my sister's place, I go to sleep, I wake up in the morning, four o'clock in the morning, we got hammered with my friends at her place in Encino, and I wake up, I have nothing going on for myself, I'm working at Burger King at the time, I'm going to Glendale Community College. I said, listen, if I go the way I'm going right now, nothing's gonna happen to my life. I called my dad, I said, dad, I need you to come pick me up, take me to the recruiting station. I went to the recruiting station, I said, I'm making a decision right now, because if I don't do it right now, I won't, if I even have to think about joining the army, I'll change my mind. I was 18. So I said, you have to sign me up right now. They said, we can't do it right now. I said, I'm going right now. Two weeks later, I was in South Carolina, and I joined the army. When I went into the army, Jay, the biggest thing I picked up from the military was the structure and the system.

• 31:44Speaker 01

  Like, literally, the system, the structure, it was a, every day was a routine, and you're coming in four o'clock formation, then you're running, then it's chow, then it's formation, then it's going to the motor pool, then you're working on your trucks, then it's chow again, then going back on the motor pool, working on the second trucks, and you're coming back, then it's more training. It was so routine and that routine kind of, I'm not a routine guy. For the longest time, I was not a routine person. And then you had to mentally and emotionally be able to take the torture, torturing. You would take words. It was words, the drill sergeants, the stuff they would say to you, Jay, to see how tough you are. Hey, tell me about your girlfriend. And you're like, oh, this guy wants to get to know me. What does your girlfriend look like? Oh, my girlfriend looks like this. Oh, she's hot, ain't she? Tell me about your best friend. Oh, my best friend, man, he's the best guy in the world.

• 32:29Speaker 01

  Oh, really? Yeah, you know, they're hooking up right now. I mean, that kind of stuff. You know, they're, and you're like, what? They're together right now. Wouldn't you love to call them? Oh, I'm sorry, you don't have access to phones for two more months. This is the kind of stuff they're telling you. Like, who needs to go through this kind of stuff, right? But then you can handle that. Then when you come out and in the business world, somebody's talking trash or somebody's rejecting you, going back and saying you're not as bad as the drill sergeant games they played. So there was a lot of benefits to, probably one of the best decisions I made in my life.

• 32:59Speaker 02

  Wow, man, that, yeah, that's so interesting that. I'm still cracking up on that because that's like the worst thing to hear. But it's interesting, right? Like that resistance of being pushed to that extreme means then when you're getting the normal, I think we feel scared of this sometimes. I feel like right now, we always feel scared about what our limits are. And I always say to the people that I know and my friends, I'm like, you have no idea what your limits are. Like, if you keep stretching it, and we know this because of neuroplasticity and how the brain can be required and stretched. If you keep stretching it, you just expand your abilities. But we're scared of doing that because we feel we might break, right? We feel we might break. And I guess it's having that openness, because you have that openness to be stretched.

• 33:45Speaker 02

  Or even if you weren't open to it, you still allowed yourself to get stretched. And now that's allowing you to deal with a bigger spectrum of, of the same challenges and stresses that you see. But I, I find like the biggest struggle is in convincing yourself that you're not gonna break if you stretch yourself. How do you do that? How do you push yourself and know you're not gonna break? Because I think so today, we're so much more fragile today. Because we are fragile because of the trauma we've experienced through our parenting or through our childhood and so now we we avoid pain. And then the whole time you kept saying, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, right? We get to go through that pain. So tell us that, how did you go through pain without stopping yourself from breaking? Feeling like you're gonna break?

• 34:30Speaker 01

  You know, i- i- it's it's funny you say that. When it comes down to my kids, I have a, I have a couple of rules with my kids. I have a, I have an eight-year-old, a six-year-old, and a four-year-old, right? I've been married eleven years, these are the three kids, and they're very different. My oldest likes vampires, have no clue why. The middle one looks like a Middle Eastern Bo Jackson. You, you look at his butt is like this. He's got calves bigger than mine, he's got muscles. I mean, it's you, everybody likes the middle one. He'll come to the office and during the pandemic, he was here every day for twelve weeks and they were, you know, making a hundred and two shots a day. They were supposed to read twenty books, twenty pages a day, and they would watch a documentary every single day with me during the pandemic at the office. And then this was a routine, every day they would do this. The middle one would come to the office and Jay, he'd go sit in people's offices and he

• 35:15Speaker 01

  would say, I don't know if you know or not, my dad's your boss. I'm like, you can't say that kind of stuff to people, Dylan. And he's kidding with them. That's how he is, he's so witty. And he would say, so what do you do? He says, I do customer service. Can I make some of the calls? You wanna make, can I talk to the customer? He takes the phone and talks to customers at six years old. Then the four-year-old is a smack talker. She's a whole different story, right? How she is. But there's a few things I talk to these guys about. I say, we lead, we respect, we improve, we love as a family. These are four things we do. When we pray for four things, we pray for courage, wisdom, tolerance, understanding. That's what we pray for. But we also talk about bullying. I spend a lot of time talking to my kids about bullying, a lot of time talking about bullying. I tell them, you're gonna be bullied.

• 35:58Speaker 01

  But in life, there's two things that Bedavids don't do. We don't bully and we don't get bullied. Now, having said that. Many times when you see kids that are growing up, you'll see the younger one end up becoming the peak performer and does a lot of big things in their lives. The older one's a little bit more responsible, maybe makes some conservative decisions. The younger one pushes the envelope a little bit, you know, is a little bit more reckless than all the other guys. Why? Because the older one bullied the other guys a little bit, right? They pushed them around, they punched them. Why'd you punch them? Why'd you hit them? Give it to them. And, and, and I know this is gonna sound weird, especially to your audience. There's a bit of it that we do need. I do think we need to be pushed around a little bit. I do think we need to be challenged a little bit.

• 36:42Speaker 01

  I do think we need a little bit of resistance. I do think we need a little bit of pushback. I do think we need it because when that happens to you, you get tested. And when, when you're tested, you actually learn a lot about yourself. You find out if you have what it takes. You find out if you have the goodies. When we were first starting the channel by Tim, and here's what I said to the guys. I said, look, we're gonna find that I'll do 52 episodes, but within 52 episodes, we're gonna find that if there's an audience for this or not. If there's not, I don't want to use the resources. I'm gonna go back to doing what I'm doing here. It was 52 or 104 episodes. Two years I went and I said, two years later, we'll make a decision. I said, okay, there is an audience. Let's see what we can do with this and then we built on it. Podcast, same thing. Let's see, because some people can do good long-form interviews, but they're not good for podcasts.

• 37:24Speaker 01

  Some people do good short motivational videos and it goes viral, but their content on vlog is not that good. People are not entertained. You have to find your niche, what you're good at. Just because you're good in one thing doesn't mean you're gonna be good at everything on blogs, podcasts. So you have to kind of find that and be honest with yourself. To me, it's all about that test. You'll sit there and say, I'm not good at it. But here's the scariest part about the question that you asked. Here's the scariest part about the question that you asked. Jade, there is nothing scarier than never experiencing the unknown. Let me explain what I mean by the unknown. To me, I cannot tell you how scary it is for me if I never find out the potential Patrick. Like, to live a life without the unknown is just not worth living for me.

• 38:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'll sit down with somebody and you know, a lot of people this morning, I was doing a conference call with some of my executives and I said, in the last 19 years I've been in this financial business and we have around 15,000 agents right now, nearly a half a million square feet of office space. I'm the majority owner. We have raised a lot of money. We've done good stuff for ourselves, right? And I've mentored a lot of people and I've watched a lot of people how they are and what drives. Everybody's driven by a different thing. Some of them are madness. Some of them is advancement, some of them is individual, some of them is about, you know, a purpose. They want to do something, but everyone's different. The one line that a lot of people that never wanted to put up the effort, they would say a line like this. They would say, Pat, let me tell you, if I really wanted to, I'd be the biggest guy in the financial industry.

• 38:52Speaker 01

  You know that line. If I really wanted to, I'd be the biggest guy on YouTube. If I really wanted to, I'd build the biggest podcast. If I really wanted to, I'd be the biggest Instagram. If I really wanted to, if I really wanted to, and it's a form of a cop out. It's a form of a cop out because let's just say you actually did what you think you could do. Let's say you became the biggest podcaster. Let's say you became the best in the financial industry. Let's say you became the biggest real estate guy. Let's say you became what you think if you really wanted to become the biggest. Who benefits from it? Who benefits from you become the biggest? If you have kids, is it fair to say that Trump benefited from the Trump last name? Yes. Is it fair to say that Kennedy benefited from the Kennedy last name?

• 39:33Speaker 01

  Of course. Is it fair to say that there's a benefit to Chelsea Clinton for her last name being Clinton? Is it fair to say that if you're born in the Duchess family, you want to talk, you know, some of these families, the royalty family? You benefit from it, yes. So if you do what you're saying, if I really wanted to do it, I would really be the biggest in X, Y, Z. Who would benefit from it? Your kids, your family, your loved ones. Why wouldn't you do it if you know it's going to benefit them? Why wouldn't you do it if you know they're going to have a bigger advantage at 18 years old than you do? Why wouldn't you do it? So it's not that if you really wanted to, you don't think you can do it. So that's really a cop out way of doing it. We've all done this before. But the reality is if somebody's watching this, man, I just don't recommend.

• 40:17Speaker 01

  I would much rather get in the ring and fight somebody. And have an answer by the end. And the answer is, he beats you. I'm good. I can live with that. Then not go in the ring and for the rest of my life, think you could have beaten that person. Let's get in the ring and hash it out. Let's go out there and see if we can build this business. Let's go out there and see if I can do this podcast. Let's go out there and see, because I am not willing to live a life knowing that I've couldn't taken it to a whole different level, but I was too afraid of the risk. I'm not willing to do that. That's the unknown. You gotta, you gotta be willing to accept not experiencing the unknown and I'm just not willing to do it.

• 40:52Speaker 02

  I can fully relate to that, man. That is like, that is, that's the truth. It's the simple truth. And you're spot on that if you don't explore it, you just never know where it may go. And, and I think, you know, we don't feel that and experience that. I know, I, I definitely identify with that in my life. I am so grateful for that moment where I decided that I was gonna try and do what I do now. Because it was, I was, exactly what you said, when you said like, I was this close to settling for normality, security, stability and safety. I was this close. And every time I look back and I'm just like, wow, I'm so grateful. And, and the funny thing is, people think you only make that decision once. You have to make that decision all the time. Because there's a new safety net, there's a new stability, there's a new security.

• 41:37Speaker 02

  And even five years in, your mind's still trying to get you to settle for that. So it's not that you make the decision once and everything changes. You have to remind yourself that you made that decision. And one thing I've mentioned, uh, one thing I've heard you mention is that you say you visualize your dad's funeral maybe fifty thousand times. And, and I wanted to ask you, what purpose does that serve you? Like, what is, what does that do for you when you do that visualization?

• 42:01Speaker 01

  So you, you have to realize that for, when I go through the category of madness, lifestyle, individual and purpose and what people are driven by. Talk about people being driven by twenty different things. This is having worked with a lot of different people before. I know what I'm driven by. I'm in the madness quality, right? I'm the guy that's driven by a chip, driven by you can't do this, driven by an opponent, opposition, doing something that's never been done before. That's my, and I didn't know this for a long time. By the way, for the longest time, I thought I had issues until I read. Uh, two of these books back here, one is called Hypomanic Edge and the other one is called First Rate Madness, which is such powerful, neither one of the books did very good, but there's such great- I've never heard of them, I've never heard of them.

• 42:41Speaker 01

  Hypo- Hypomanic Edge talks about the, the, the, the link between craziness and a lot of success. And it talks about all of these people, the, the upbringing of Bill Clinton, how hypomanic he was, and the, the Jacksons, and all these other leaders, it's a brilliant book, both of those books I highly recommend it. Once I got to a point where I said, listen, you hear all these different people speaking, you're not that guy. You have nothing in common with her when it comes down to style and vision, that's fine. That's not you, you don't have his gift. This is you. You are wired this way based on a life that you live, right? Okay. So, once I saw that and I brought it back and I saw that what I was driven by, what moved me, from there it was about, okay, what do you want to do with it now?

• 43:26Speaker 01

  At what level do you want to go with this? How high do you want to go with this? What levels do you want to take it? What, you know, how big do you want to scale this? Then I used that as a way to motivate myself to go to the next step. So I think the biggest thing when you think about different people out there and what they want to do is, they have to sit down and figure out what drives them. Too often, like, you know, like, you do your videos, right? You've had what, 40 billion views? I don't know what the number is. You are all, one of your videos got a quarter of a billion views, no? Like, you have one of your videos got a quarter of a billion views. I, I don't know how many people can say they have a video with a quarter billion views. Now, here's the thing, I see so many people Jay that try to be you, they can't. You're not Jay Shetty, this is Jay's purpose. Jay is driven with a certain demeanor that you are so,

• 44:09Speaker 01

  you calm people down, your, your strength is just, you're, you're a, you're a unifier, you're a synergist. You're good with bringing people together, you're calming, you're good for the world. We need more people like you, right? But not everybody's like you. So you'll see a lot of people that'll watch you and they'll say, "I'm trying to be like Jay." And then they'll watch 20, "I'm trying to be like 20." And then I'll watch, "I'm trying to be like Gary, I'm trying to be like..." Once you figure out what moves you and you get clear on that part, the rest is history. That's one of the reasons why I wrote this book, Your Next Five Moves, which, uh, you know, when, when I was writing this book and I was working on this, it's an interesting thing on what happened. This is years ago, so I started putting all this content together for this book years ago. One morning I wake up. I wake up in the morning and it's six o'clock.

• 44:54Speaker 01

  At six o'clock, I had a message from my mom. Okay, my mom's message was, I am so disappointed in my son. What happened to my son who loved his mother so much that would call me and tell me how much she loved? You know, the typical guilt trip type of message that moms are supposed to leave sometimes. She left that message, right? So I get that message and at six o'clock, I'm like, okay, that's the first message. Then I get my text from my girlfriend at the time who says, I think you love your business more than you love me. We have to really reconsider our relationship because if it's gonna go this way, I don't see this going anywhere. That's my second message, okay? Then I just had closed a big deal the week before. An email, the client sends me an email saying, I found another policy that's gonna give me better returns than yours.

• 45:37Speaker 01

  I signed with New York Life yesterday, I'm canceling the policy with you. I was, this is the time I didn't have money. I'm relying on this policy, canceled. Then my number one agent leads me to New York Life at that time. And I'm sitting there saying, what? And at this point, Jay, it's 6:07. For seven minutes of the day, I have an issue with my mom, I have an issue with my girlfriend, I have an issue with my client, and I have an issue with my number one sales guy. I'm sitting there in bed and here's what I'm processing. What do I do next? So first thing I thought about, okay? So you're going through and you're thinking, okay, do I call my mom first? To make her feel that, do I send her roses? Do I call my assistant? Do I call my girl? Do I talk to her and say, come over to the house, let's try to rekindle? You mean a lot to me? Do I really wanna do that? Am I really gonna compromise my career?

• 46:22Speaker 01

  Why would I say that to her? Knowing I'm gonna have to choose my dreams over her and she doesn't buy into me? But I love her, but what if I draw? And she's so beautiful, what are my friends gonna say about me? When I go to the clubs every, what if my? You're thinking all these thoughts. What am I, do I call my sales guy? Do I call the client? You think about all, that moment, here's what I said. This is what I thought about that moment. You can have 10 different people experience the same exact situation and they're gonna handle it in a different way. All I wanted to know was, what is the right next five moves? And the right sequence to make, right? LeBron James and his partner buddy Maverick Carter, they just got a funding of $100 million to start their own black media company called Green Hill, right? Big deal. Congratulations to them, right?

• 47:06Speaker 01

  So you look at this LeBron James guy, people think he's just a basketball player. The guy is as methodical as they come, right? So he's in high school, on the cover of Sports Illustrated, goes in the NBA, everybody's expecting him to be great. He does more than that. So he says, "I'm first gonna be a great basketball player," because he's studying everybody. He's studying, "I want to take a play out of Jordan's playbook. Go become the greatest basketball team. I'm gonna take a page out of Kobe, I'm gonna take a page out of..." I know this one's gonna sound strange, Trump, because of social media and Apprentice and all that stuff. He puts it together. He becomes one of the greatest in basketball, so that was his industry, number two. He goes out there and uses his market to make money, which he's made god knows how much money. Then he starts a media company while he's playing at a peak of a time like this, with what's going on around the world, perfect timing.

• 47:51Speaker 01

  Then he's gonna retire from basketball after playing with his son on the same team, Bronny, which is gonna happen, he'll be the first to do it. Then he's gonna own a basketball team. What is LeBron's inspirations long-term? Is he trying to run for office one day? What's he setting up for? What is this? He's not just a basketball guy. Is he trying... And when I'm studying that, I say brilliance, right? When you think about Amazon just bought Zoox yesterday, a self-driving company for $1.2 billion, what are you doing? What did Amazon do buying Whole Foods, just four years ago? What are you doing buying Whole Foods? What did Amazon do buying his company? And you saw, then Elon Musk tweeted out saying he's just a copycat. What are they doing? What are their strengths? Then you realize, it's all about your next five moves. So in the game of chess, a grandmaster is somebody that knows their next 10 or 15 moves, right?

• 48:36Speaker 01

  A master knows their 10 moves, a pro knows five to six moves, and amateur knows their next one to three moves. The whole part... If you play chess, you kind of, here's what I'm gonna be doing. Some of the guys know seven moves, they beat you. The whole purpose of life to me is, whether it's marriage, whether it's having kids, you get people that come and say, "I want to get married." Why do you want to get married? What's the purpose of getting married? Why do you want to... "I want to have kids." Why do you want to have kids? Because everybody's doing it. "I want to become a millionaire." Why do you want to... So when you go through the process and put it down, and you put the right 15 steps in place, that's the right 15 steps. Then eventually, you get to go exactly where you want to go to. And that's one of the reasons why I wrote this book, Your Next Five Moves, because most people...

• 49:14Speaker 01

  Have the right intentions, most people have the right vision. Most people are thinking big, there's not a lot of people, most people do think big. But they don't know what they need to be doing in the next five, 10, 15 steps. And once they figure that part out, the rest is history.

• 49:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, I love that, man. And I absolutely love analyzing strategy and methodology and all those people you just picked out. It's fascinating to watch, but I like the way that you break it down into the next five moves. Because I think like you're saying, for anyone, their next five moves may not even be building the next big thing. Their next five moves is just getting off their couch. Someone, someone, and that's why I love, love the theory in the book, because it's so practical. Because it's like, hey, whether you're sitting on your couch, or whether you already have a million dollar business, or whether you just got rejected from a girl that doesn't like you anymore, whatever it is. It's like, we all need to know what our next five moves are, right? It applies to everyone.

• 50:08Speaker 02

  And, and I love that you start with the principle of master knowing yourself as move number one. And, and my question to you is, let's, let's dive into some of these, because I think it's fun to break them down. So people can get an idea of what's in the book. But tell me, what is the sign when someone can say, I feel I know myself versus I don't know myself? How does someone come to that decision of being able to say, yeah, I think I know myself right now enough to make this first move?

• 50:33Speaker 01

  It's, it's actually learning what you don't, what you can't do, and what's not you. You know, for me, it's what's not you, like, when you want to get married, like, I was dating three girls in nine years, and each of them was like a two, three year relation, these are serious relationships.

• 50:47Speaker 02

  Not at the same time, Patrick, not at the same time.

• 50:49Speaker 01

  No, not at the same time, that was 21 years old, but not, not at 28, 29. So I'm dating these girls, and at the end of it, one day, Jay, I'm so furious, because I'm like, oh my gosh, look at all these girls. They're all the same, same upbringing, same issues, it's the same challenge with everybody I'm dating. And then I sat there and I'm like, well, is it the girl, or is it the way you're presenting yourself? What is it? What, what is it? What, what are you looking forward to being? Do you want to be a husband, or do you want to be a daddy? What do you want to be? What are you really solving for? So I made a list, and one of my assistants, her name was Patty, changed my life, she said, I said, listen Patty, I've made a decision, I was 20, I said, I'm never getting married.

• 51:28Speaker 01

  I enjoy my own company, I like going to movies by myself, I have a lot of friends, I'm good, I'm happy, I don't need to get married, I'm fine. She says, listen, before you decide to not get married, go read this book. I said, what's the book? She said, I heard it on the radio today, I've never read it, but I thought about you.

• 51:44Speaker 01

  I said, "What's the book's name?" She says, "101 Questions to Ask Before You Get Engaged." I said, "101 Questions to Ask Before You Get Engaged." So I go buy the book. It's by a man named Norman Wright. It comes in, I start going through every single question together by myself. I'm like, "Okay, it's pretty interesting." "I thought I was looking for this, but I have no interest in this." "I'm looking for this." But for the longest time, this was a priority. And one of the things is non-negotiables of what you don't want. Once I figured out what I didn't want, it was a lot easier to go date. And, and you know, what to say no to, and what to say yes to. It became so much easier. From the moment I got clear on who I wanted to marry and what things I needed to improve in. I read the book. A year later, I found my wife, and then we got married.

• 52:29Speaker 01

  I mean, it's so funny how this thing worked out when I got clear. So now, who do you want to be, right? When you talk about who do you want to, uh, uh, you know, master knowing yourself. There's a lot of different routes in life. One of the best things that a friend of mine told me, a mentor of mine, his name is Tom. He was a former president at PHP for three years. Tom used to be with Jam Dad. They sold their company to EA Sports for $680 million in 04. And he was the number six guy, the number six guy, Jake, okay? But he's still got a fat check, right? And one day, he sat me down, told me the most powerful thing. He says, "Pat, here's what I've learned." He was 48, 49 when he told me this. He said, "I founded four companies as a founder and the CEO. I made nothing off any one of these companies.

• 53:12Speaker 01

  Anytime I was number two or number six, I made millions. Anytime I was number one, I didn't do well." He says, "It took me 49 years to realize I'm not a number one." Do you realize how powerful of a statement that is to make? Because everybody's trying to be what? A number one. Jordan was a great number two. You know, Jordan was a great number one. Pippen was a great number two. LeBron's a number one. You know, you have to look at everybody. And then sometimes, you may be a number one at a phase of your life, but at 58, maybe you are better being a number two. Or maybe at 28, you're better at being number two. Maybe at 39, you're a good number one. So you kind of have to go through these phases. That is part of understanding and knowing yourself. So once you know, and say, "You know what?" I don't care to build a billion dollar company because it's not me, I'm just not a founder.

• 53:57Speaker 01

  I'm somebody that wants to go this route, I'm somebody that wants to go this route, great. Entrepreneur, intrapreneur, salesperson, solopreneur, but the biggest thing is to go through the question. I have a set of questions that I went through years ago and I put twenty eight of them in the book here. To find out exactly who you are, to find out like questions such as, okay Jay, who do you get along with? And you write down, these are the people I get along with, then you write down, who do you not get along with? You know, what kind of a question is that? Well, why don't you get along with those types of people? Then you say, you know, I don't get along with those three guys because they're just like me. Well, maybe you gotta kinda like yourself, you got some things you gotta like about yourself. So when you go through that part, then comes the second step. So number one is master knowing yourself.

• 54:36Speaker 02

  Yeah, I love that, man. That's a great answer. I think that example of when you're one or two or six, that's currently one of the biggest challenges we have in the world. Because as we know, social media, entrepreneurship, the conversation that's happening in business, the availability of seeing the big business deals that are happening. Unfortunately, you know, we see this all the time in society and I think it's been out there. Like whatever's rewarded, we end up repeating. And so we go where the reward is, rather than thinking about what's going to be a reward for me, right? What's gonna help me get there? And so I think that's a brilliant answer and I'm really glad you made that distinction. And I'm glad that there's questions in here as well. Because I think people need to start asking the right questions in order to get there.

• 55:20Speaker 02

  And that's really the step of self-awareness. Tell me about this one, move number three, I'm skipping because move to number two, we kind of talked at the beginning. By the way, for everyone who doesn't know, move number two in the book is mastering the ability to reason. We were speaking about that earlier. But mastering building the right team, I'm asking you this as a personal question actually. Because as I've been growing my team and my company and my world, I'm realizing that the biggest skill that I personally need to work on is how to hire, like how to recruit. And I'm realizing that this is something that I need to invest in at this time in my life. If someone says to me right now, what's the number one skill you need to improve? That's the number one skill I need to improve, like I'm aware of it from a professional level.

• 56:04Speaker 02

  So tell me about building the right team, something that people. I feel like it's so hard to figure out whether someone's right for you or not right for you. There's so many different approaches. I want to hear your approach. For for making sure that someone is actually right for the long term. So specific question here, not just someone who's right for you, someone who's right to become a long term number two, number three, number four, number five, number six, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. In the company.

• 56:31Speaker 01

  So very good question, very, very, very, very good question. And I'll kind of give it to you in the way I processed it myself. So uh uh first things first is it's not just who's right for you, it's who you need next today. Right? So for example, who I needed in two in two thousand and five was different than who I needed in two thousand and eight was different than who I needed in two thousand and ten. So for example, I came up, I first need an assistant to help me out with paperwork. So you get an assistant, right? Then I needed three assistants because somebody were on my calendar. Somebody sent my cards and gifts to the client, somebody followed up. So it was three assistants. So then I got a person that did all my paperwork and compliance. So that person's a technical person, so they protected my business. And then I got this person.

• 57:14Speaker 01

  So then as we're growing and we start a PHB and I'm a sales guy. Traditionally, I've never been a CEO before. I've never worked under the CEO before. I've just been a sales guy. I've been a good sales leader and I've made money selling. So when you go from an employee to a salesperson, to a sales leader, to starting a company as a founder. This is a whole different language. You don't know what you need to be doing here because you've not got. I'm not, I don't have an MBA, I don't have a a business degree. So when I became a CEO, Jay, it was it was three, four years of anxiety, panic and worry about making the right, the wrong decision. And it was constantly, I don't know what to do as a CEO. And so as I was going through this and I kind of started looking at everything that I was doing, I said, okay.

• 57:55Speaker 01

  I need to figure out what I have to do on a daily basis myself, what I need to do on a daily basis as a CEO. I went to a course I took and I spent uh uh four weeks together with a hundred and forty four other CEOs from sixty four different countries. And the guy I teamed up with for four weeks was the founder of the Victoria's Secret of Australia and South Africa. Okay, he's worth nine hundred million dollars at the time. He's worth about a billion and a half right now. And four weeks is my partner. So here I am trying to be a CEO. He's in his mid fifties. Look what he says to me, Jay. And I said, you know, Bob, I'm trying to be a CEO. What are the keys to being a CEO? He says, well. Says, I'm trying to get seven CEOs of mine that are running seven different companies to be CEO.

• 58:37Speaker 01

  So his challenge was getting his seven CEOs to be CEOs. My challenge is I'm trying to be a CEO. Look how many levels behind him I am because he went from being a founder to a CEO, to giving up his position, then they bought a bunch of different companies. Now he's got seven CEOs reporting to him. And we started processing through all these different things. And he said, look, there's a couple of things you gotta be thinking about. There's linear, there's exponential. There's a lot of things that people do when they start a business that doesn't explode the business. It's linear, meaning I need systems. So you fix your systems and your protocols and standard operating procedure. And it's like here, first step, we do this. Second step, we do this. Third step is this, okay, fine. And then it's biz debt. You go shake hands, collaborate, network and all this stuff. It's fine, it's good, but it's not at the highest level.

• 59:21Speaker 01

  That's linear, helps you grow, but it's linear, it's not exponential. Then he said at the highest level is exponential is one, the next innovative campaign. A next innovative campaign is Jay Shetty coming out with a new show. Okay, what is that new show? It could be a new series of videos. It could be a new podcast. It could be a new collaboration. It could be Jay debate topic with compassion. And you bring two people in LA and they come to your studio and they debate. Boom, that's a great idea. All of a sudden you got 17 million new followers. They love Jay's new show, right? That's a next innovative campaign that Jay came up with. And the last one is leadership development. Leadership development is two ways of looking at it. One is how good you are at building leaders, which that is the pinnacle.

• 1:00:04Speaker 01

  Because if you can take a six and turn them an eight, you're always going to be needed. There's a lot of people that don't know how to turn a six into an eight, where they have to go just find an eight. And they're never going to improve the eight, they just go find an eight, right? And the eight stays an eight, won't improve because of you. So one is improving leaders and developing leaders. The other one is being able to find the right leaders that want to work with you. So when you want to find the right leaders to work with you, my phrase Jay is very simple. Everybody I have here that are working for us behind this window. I ask him a question and I say, so what do you think about what we do? And all I'm trying to get to is, are they true believers in me? The smaller I am, the more important it is for you to be a true believer in me. And once it's a company, are you a true believer of what we're doing as a company?

• 1:00:49Speaker 01

  Like right now, we are looking for a new COO and a CEO. I'm looking at, I'm interviewing a CEO from a Fortune 50 company to replace me. This is a man that ran a company that I sent tens of thousands of insurance policies to. He's not going to replace my position. And one of the biggest challenge we had together was, look, you're coming from a Fortune 50 company. We're not a Fortune 500 company, we're not a Fortune 1000 company. How are you going to be from the snobby people in your world to being able to level down and work with these types of people? You're going to make the same money, that's not going to change, but maybe you're not fit for this. So we were going, that was the biggest hiccup for us, by the way. So I had to see if he would be a fit for us. And eventually, when I saw people that were true believers in me.

• 1:01:31Speaker 01

  So if I hire somebody who says, Jay, man, I'm such a believer in you. You're awesome, you're amazing, I'll do anything for you, but capacity is low and talent is low. What's the purpose? What am I going to hire you for? But if you get somebody that says, Jay, obviously, I love the work you're doing. I'm a true believer in the difference you're making. I like the values and principles you have in place. But if I can be open with you, I can talk to you about a couple of things. What, I can help you in the operations. I think what I can do is the following. I don't need the limelight, I don't need to be on the camera, I don't even want to be doing any of that. But behind closed doors, I think you're missing out on an opportunity to make $6 million a year here. I think you're missing out on opportunity to turn this thing to a business over here. If we come up with this, this app in it, sell it this way and team up with this guys over here.

• 1:02:13Speaker 01

  If we go to CNN or get a contract with Pepsi or Coca-Cola, I can help you do that. But I'm 100% with you. So it's identifying the true believers in you, around you, and identifying who you need exactly next. And typically, big personalities like yourself and myself, these are personalities. Operation becomes a challenge. The challenge becomes finding the right COO. I cannot tell you how much a COO can change your life. A COO can change, the right COO who believes in Jay Shetty, can take your business from what you're doing today to being astronomical and they're behind closed doors. So again, that's some of the ways I look at on who I need to hire next.

• 1:02:53Speaker 02

  I love that, man. What a great answer. Everyone, you can hear this. Patrick, that David, your next five moves. Incredible storyteller. I could sit and listen to you talk for ages. Look, just think about it for a moment. Everyone's listening or watching. Obviously, Patrick's a great business person. He's a great storyteller. He knows the stats. He's analyzing, but he's reflective. It's not just, you know, just repeating stuff. This is his reflection. You can hear the process in his mind. That's what you're gonna get inside his book. So, your next five moves must be a business strategy. If you're struggling, you're like, what do I do next? Here it is, your next five moves, right? Not just the next one. So, going around copy this book. Patrick, I want to end with two segments on the podcast that we do. You're gonna be great at this. They're the rapid fire segments. So, we have the fill in the blanks and the fast five.

• 1:03:36Speaker 02

  We're gonna start with fill in the blanks first. So, you just gotta fill in the blanks at the end of the sentence. Okay. The challenge with big, massive success is?

• 1:03:45Speaker 01

  Staying humble.

• 1:03:47Speaker 02

  Nice. I love that answer. Okay. The game of entrepreneurship is never about?

• 1:03:53Speaker 01

  You.

• 1:03:55Speaker 02

  Being the best version of yourself means?

• 1:04:00Speaker 01

  Constantly beating your prior best.

• 1:04:03Speaker 02

  Shocking your business involves?

• 1:04:06Speaker 01

  Recreating yourself.

• 1:04:08Speaker 02

  Nice. The biggest mistake people make in business is?

• 1:04:13Speaker 01

  Thinking it's all about them.

• 1:04:16Speaker 02

  Nice. I love all of your answers. We're talking about humility and getting out the ego. So, that's great. Okay. These are your fast fives. These are questions that the answer has to be one word or one sentence maximum. Okay. Well, I've got so many for you. All right. I've got so many questions I want to ask you. Oh, this is what I want to ask you because I want everyone to go and watch this video. I believe every creator has a video that they make where they think that they have put their best message and their best insight, but for whatever reason, people are not watching that video. What is that video for you, Patrick?

• 1:04:49Speaker 01

  Oh, my gosh. We did a video. We did a video about, you know, how nobody pays attention to certain people and they've been rejected. It's not even the life of an entrepreneur. It's another one that we did. And I thought this one was for sure gonna blow up and it got forty thousand views in a week. We're like, are you kidding me with this video? So you know how it is.

• 1:05:11Speaker 02

  What's it called? Tell us, tell us. I want everyone to go watch it.

• 1:05:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, you know what? Let me, let me, I can, it's, it's two of them. One of them is sleep, sweat, grind, repeat. I thought for a fact, sleep, sweat, grind, repeat. If you just type in sleep, sweat, grind, repeat. It's a hundred one thousand views, but in one year, you know, a hundred one thousand views on a platform with two point four million subs is not viral or anything of success. But you know what? It's my favorite video.

• 1:05:37Speaker 02

  That's good. That's what I wanted to know.

• 1:05:38Speaker 01

  It's my favorite video that didn't do anything, didn't do nothing.

• 1:05:41Speaker 02

  I love that. I love that. And please, everyone who's listening or watching this podcast, please go and watch that video because that's the one that Patrick put his heart into and I can relate to that. I've got, I've got tons of those videos as well. So awesome. Okay, now we'll get into the fast five because I wanted to ask that question. Okay. If you had to start all over again from ground zero, what would be your first five moves?

• 1:06:02Speaker 01

  Great question. Number one, identify one industry that can bring out your talents. Number one, identify your industry that can bring out your talents. I'm a numbers guy, so what is it that you see that you can go and bring out talent? Number two, find out who's the best in that industry and identify working for the best guy. So sometimes it's like, let's just say if I'm a real estate guy, I want to go into real estate. I'm in L.A. Who's the best Realtor in L.A.? I want to go work for that guy. But if I can't go for that guy, I put a top five list and I go work for them. That's number two. Number three is I work for that person and I do anything I can to help this person advance. So if their goal is to get to ten million a year, I'm gonna do my part. If you want to get to a hundred million, I'm gonna do my, if you want to get to a billion, I'm gonna do my part.

• 1:06:43Speaker 01

  The fourth thing is to replace you or ask you for equity in the company. So if I've paid the price and I'm working for Jay Shetty and Jay said, Pat, I want to be able to take the business to fifty million a year. I helped you get to fifty million. I want to say, Jay, I've gotten you fifty million. Can I be your CEO and you be the chairman of the board and I want to get four percent of company? I want to get two percent of company. And if Jay says no, or whoever that person that says no, then go start your own company. But the last thing is to become an entrepreneur. There are other ways to make your millions and billions before becoming an entrepreneur. That's the last step.

• 1:07:16Speaker 02

  Great advice, man. Alright, awesome. What, uh, this is one of my favorite questions to ask. What's something that you know to be true about business, but a lot of people would disagree with you on?

• 1:07:26Speaker 01

  It's a, it's an ugly world, very ugly. Uh, very ugly. I know it's not what people want to hear. It's not the whole, let's hold hands, kumbaya, behind closed. People in front of you will tell you, oh, we can't wait for you to blow up. I support your business, all this stuff, but, you know, if it has to come between them getting the client and you getting the client, you better believe they're gonna do whatever they can to get the client. So you cannot be, I was a kid that grew up naive. I didn't play in the streets for 10 years in Iran because my dad didn't trust me. I went to Germany at a refugee camp, J. I experienced betrayal at 11 years old and I said, wow, I had no idea what the word betrayal meant until I just experienced it. But that kind of gave me an idea saying, okay, in the business world, how different is it?

• 1:08:08Speaker 01

  Same. How different is it in military? Okay, got a little bit. How different is it? So you have to understand that you cannot be naive in business. If you stay small, it's fine because you're no threat to anybody. But if you choose to want to compete and ruffle feathers, you better believe you're gonna piss some people off.

• 1:08:24Speaker 02

  Absolutely, man. Well said, well said. Alright. If you could create a law that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it be?

• 1:08:31Speaker 01

  Everyone in the world had to follow?

• 1:08:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:34Speaker 01

  Uh, if I had to create a law that everybody in the world had to follow, say if I'm a president of the United States.

• 1:08:40Speaker 02

  At least the United States, at least the United States.

• 1:08:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, if I'm a president of the United States, what would I do every single month? Here's what I would do every single month. Every single month, I would have a set of books that every, everybody would need to read and submit their paper. And I'd put a scholarship behind it and I would go specifically on educating people on the concepts of money and mindset because, for whatever reason, we're not doing that and it's not a tough thing to do. I, I, I can't think of the last time a president recommended a book to read from stage. You know, I, I just think education and not education from a school standpoint. Education from the standpoint of you reading a set of books. There'd be a monthly book club if I was a president, that'd be for sure.

• 1:09:22Speaker 02

  I love that, the president's book club.

• 1:09:24Speaker 01

  Can you imagine that? Imagine that?

• 1:09:27Speaker 02

  It would be, I mean, I, I, it makes perfect sense. It's a great, it's a great idea. Imagine what kind of community that would do. It'd be really cool. I love that, man. That's, we've never had that answer, but not even close. That is by far the most unique answer we've ever had to that. Alright, two last questions for you. What's the best thing that money can buy?

• 1:09:45Speaker 01

  Uh, I'll give you a story. So I'm, uh, my wife and I are going to Dubai. We're taking a hundred of our guys. And when we go to the airport to go to Dubai, the flight attendant says from Air France, you can't go. I said, why not? Said, I'm a U.S. citizen now. She says, no, you can't go because your passport expires in five months. And France wants it to be more than six months. I said, you gotta be kidding me. It doesn't expire. Well, this is what it is. So my wife goes and I said, babe, you go. I want to go to the federal building. I'll fix it. I'll be there in two days. So she goes, she's with good friends. I trust her. I go back and I come to the house and my nanny's with our two kids at the time. And we were getting ready to move to Texas. And I said, hey, Melva, so we're gonna go to Texas. What's your biggest? She said, Daddy, I can't go. I said, I heard you told mommy you can't. You told me you can't go two years ago. Just change your mind.

• 1:10:30Speaker 01

  Daddy, I can't go. Mama, why can't she go? By the way, she's the most amazing nanny. She's not even, we feel uncomfortable calling her nanny. She's like a grandma to our kids. She's been in our lives for 11 years. She says, Daddy, I can't go because I got six grandkids in L.A. I said, Melva, a question for you. She said, what? I said, what if I fly you back to L.A. every month for five days? And you come to Dallas, you live with us. I get you a nice master bedroom. You get your own shower, indoor corner, privacy, car, everything. And I fly you back to L.A. five days a week, five days a month. Would you be willing to go to Dallas? She says, you would fly me? I said, yes. She says, I'm going to Dallas. I said, perfect. So when I got on the flight and went to Dubai, I said, babe, I got some news for you.

• 1:11:11Speaker 01

  Cause she was down. She was worried. I said, Melva has agreed to go to Dallas. So when you say money, you know, you get to do certain things like that. It's not the cars, the travel. It's to be able to make certain decisions that helps some people out and also helps your family out as well. So I would say that's what it would be.

• 1:11:26Speaker 02

  That's a beautiful answer, man. Thank you for not giving a, this is, this is what I really appreciate about you and I appreciate about you even more today. It's like, there's no shallow answers, you know, no quick answers, no. She's really thoughtful, really, really special, man. I, I, I appreciate you.

• 1:11:39Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 1:11:40Speaker 02

  Uh, fifth and final question. What was your biggest lesson from the last 12 months?

• 1:11:45Speaker 01

  Good one. So last 12 months, when the pandemic came up, we were getting ready to go through, uh, uh, uh, we had our company valuation. Everything was going on, uh, and I'm getting ready to hire a CEO. And I'm in L.A. at Beverly Hills Hilton. We're having our board meeting with Delahoya. Everybody's getting ready to fly in. And it's the day MBA canceled because, uh, Gobert and some of those guys got coronavirus. And NHL canceled and then Disney closed. Everybody closed and I'm with my wife and my three kids and my nanny. And my board calls me and they said, we're not coming to LA. I think it's like February 12th or some number like that. So I said, they're not coming to LA, March 13th, March 13th or March 12th. I said, what do you mean you're not coming early? Well, because of Corona. I said, you, you mean to tell me one person has died and you don't? Yes. I said, oh my gosh.

• 1:12:27Speaker 01

  So I sat there and I talked to my board for an hour and they said, Pat, this is serious. This is going to affect the economy. And we were scheduled to stay in LA for five days. I said, babe, we gotta go back. We stayed in LA for 23 hours. We flew back to LA. Jay, I have no idea what's gonna happen. Here's why. 100% of all the insurance policies and annuities we sell is face to face. It's at your house, at the kitchen table. And, and now I can't do my sales meetings. I can't do sales training. I can't come to your house. You're worried about sitting down with me. You don't even want to shake my hand. I have, I mean, this is a very awkward situation and we're, we're about to go through a transaction. And I'm sitting there saying, oh my gosh, what the heck is gonna happen here?

• 1:13:11Speaker 01

  And I said, listen, all I know is I gotta go and do my research. So I came back, I dropped off the kids at the house. I made sure my dad was good because he's 79, 78 at the time. My mom was good, 75, everybody's good. I came to the office one night, I was here for 16 hours straight on a weekend. And I studied every single thing about how the market has reacted to a pandemic. Three months later, six months later, 12 months later. So I come in, I'm like, okay, we're gonna lose a lot of money. I called my investors, I said, what are you guys expecting for us to lose? The next 60 days. He says, well, the investors are assuming you're gonna lose 40%. 40%, okay. So in my mind, I know when I'm doing my next board call, they're gonna be okay with the numbers being 40% less. Cause they just said it.

• 1:13:54Speaker 01

  It's normal, it's gonna happen because it's face to face sale. Once I did the research on the pandemic, and I know I'm giving you the longer answer here, but there's a reason why this is going this place. I look at the data and I see out of the last 10 pandemics we've had, the last 50 years, only one of them, the market was down 12 months later and it was AIDS. Everything else, every pandemic, six months later, 12 months later, they all 100% recovered. Meaning if the Dow was at 10, it went down to seven, it came back to 10, right?

• 1:14:26Speaker 01

  So I saw this and I said, there's a 90% chance based on the data that the market's going to recover within 12 months. I didn't sell a single stock. Every time the market went down, I just bought more. Every time the market, I bought more. Eighteen thousand, I bought more, right? Immediately, I called everybody, all my carriers, everybody said, guys, we got to figure out a way for us to be able to sell through Zoom. Because if I can sell through Zoom, we have a problem here. You're going to take a hit. Then we have to get insurance carriers to not take payments from clients. Meaning, if I can't make a payment for four months, you got to forgive them. 100%, they forgave them. And 100% of them converted everything to sell. Where I can talk to you right now, I can get you on a share and have you sell the policy and sign it. It was all scored away.

• 1:15:07Speaker 01

  Once we did that, Jay, we went from selling 4,000 policies in a month of January and February. Last month, in a month of May, we sold 10,968 policies. It was our biggest revenue month ever, biggest profit month ever, biggest EBITDA month ever, biggest commission month ever. And this month, we had the most people ever make $100,000 in a month, in a month of June. We've never had this before. So I tell you, I went four months straight during the pandemic. There's only three days that I didn't come to the office, three Sundays that I didn't come to the office. Every other day, I was at the office, and I had no idea what was going to happen. We were ready to be prepared that a lot of it was going to shift. But the best thing that came out of it, today, 90% of

• 1:15:47Speaker 01

  all the policies we sell is through Zoom. 90%. So this crisis changed the entire business model. And it's fascinating what we're doing today with the insurance company. So, but I tell you, I sound excited today. I guarantee you, if you would have talked to me, four months ago was an act. I had to figure out a way to stay poised.

• 1:16:07Speaker 02

  I get it, man. Congratulations, by the way. That's a, that's a great story of greatness that's come out of this time. So, that's an incredible story, man. Thank you for sharing it in depth. Yeah, huge congrats. I mean, that's not easy to do at all. And right now, so many people are panicking, especially like you're saying, your business is 100% face to face. My mom's a financial advisor, so I know what the work's like. She just works for herself. She's a solo entrepreneur. But, you know, it's, yeah, it's a tough industry to be in, especially this time. So congrats, man. That's amazing.

• 1:16:36Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 1:16:37Speaker 02

  Everyone, your next five moves with Patrick Bet, David Mas, VR, business strategy. And I'm hoping, Patrick, that we get to hang out when you come to LA, or I get to come to Dallas. And I look forward to doing this more, man. I'm really looking forward to it.

• 1:16:49Speaker 01

  I knew you from your videos are going viral. Obviously, I've seen your videos all over the place and what you're done. And after this interview, man, I know you in a different level. I cannot wait for you and I to go break bread. And I was telling you off camera when I told you you and your wife belong on the cover of a Maxim magazine, a GQ magazine. It's like the Ken and Barbie when I look at you guys. Can't wait to see if you guys ever have any plans. I know some of the folks don't have plans on having babies. When you make baby, when you have babies yourself, I'm sure some modeling agency is gonna pick them up day one, so.

• 1:17:25Speaker 02

  You're very kind, man, but I'm looking forward to it as well, man. Like, I have a lot of respect for you and let everyone know where they can follow you. ValueTainment on YouTube, it's your name on Instagram, right?

• 1:17:34Speaker 01

  Yes, yes.

• 1:17:35Speaker 02

  And then your nextfivemoves.com spelled out.

• 1:17:39Speaker 01

  Spelled out.

• 1:17:39Speaker 02

  Five spelled out as well, F-I-V-E. Yournextfivemoves.com. Go and check it out. We will put the links to all of this in the podcast as well, so you'll have that. Patrick Betted, thank you so much, man. This was awesome, man. Yeah, let's stay connected, man.

• 1:17:54Speaker 01

  Absolutely, Jay. Thanks for having me again. Thank you.

• 1:18:06Speaker 08

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• 1:18:36Speaker 03

  Mr. President, my company foreme of the explosion on our rig

• 1:18:39Speaker 04

  on October 2nd.

• 1:18:40Speaker 03

  Causing massive water displacement and triggering a tsunami. They all heap the blame on me.

• 1:18:45Speaker 04

  Tom Cruise is. Digger got us into this mess, and Digger's gonna dig us out. From the director of Birdman and The Revenant.

• 1:18:52Speaker 05

  What would happen if I stopped going? You stall, you freeze in there, that's what.

• 1:18:56Speaker 04

  With great power comes great deniability.

• 1:19:00Speaker 05

  I'm not the first nanny.

• 1:19:01Speaker 04

  Digger. See the trailer online. Only in theaters October 2nd. Rated R. Under 17. Not a middle without parent.

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• 1:19:30Speaker 09

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