Giggly Squad
Hosted by Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo
Paige feels betrayed and Hannah is manifesting spring. sign up for our newsletter pre-order our book
10,965 words · 6 speakers
Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.
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Sup, Gigglers? Gary, fix the wifi. Manifest that shit. We can't be nannas.
I mean, the day just got away from me.
Hello, my Galinda Gigglers. I know what some of you are thinking. That was a very old reference.
I was gonna say, when are we done with that now?
Look.
Until the second part comes out.
We're very tired. Paige didn't know there was a second part, but I just watched it for the second time because I was very bored in my hotel room.
Any new revelations?
Just that John Bailey's fucking hot.
Yeah, he is.
You didn't even, okay, tell everyone how you keep buying it and not watching it.
Sorry, Daphne's in the background right now and it's really distracting.
No, she's a runway model.
She just strutted off. She was like, I don't get paid enough to be involved in your stupid content that you make.
No, literally. Look, I'm always trying to support the girls and I keep trying to watch Wicked, but I keep falling asleep. So, I mean, I've supported my fair share. I've bought it like seven times.
You said that there's a theory that they didn't win any Oscars, except for the costume design.
Yeah.
Because they're waiting for part two, but I think that's BS. Life is short and you don't know what's gonna come out next year. I did just watch Conclave on the plane.
Oh, you did?
Okay, you've been, you know what, Hannah, I feel like you've been betraying me a lot recently. Like, I'm just gonna tell, yeah, listen, I-
Say it. I know what you're gonna say.
No, just vote, just vote. Yeah, you do know what I'm gonna say. Okay, so when we went on our first tour, it was just me and Hannah, okay? We were going to these different cities, we were dealing with the men at the theaters, and then all of a sudden, we had Grayson. Okay, wait, actually. I missed a part. So when it was just the two of us and we were in our early days, you know, we would get back to the hotel room and we would gossip and we would order food and we would eat together and we would eat McDonald's. The first, honestly, this is probably why I had a panic attack in the beginning of the tour. The first tour stop this past September, Hannah said, and I quote, "They can't eat McDonald's."
On this tour like we did last tour.
Look, I love McDonald's so much, but we were eating it every night at like 10:30, 11:00 PM.
Okay, we were bonding Hannah, we were freaking bonding.
But I just said, maybe for this 60 show tour, let's not do McDonald's every single time.
Okay, and I listened to you. And do you want to know how many times we got McDonald's on this tour? Zip. Zilch. Zero. Okay? Then it's our last show. We're in Salt Lake City, Sunday night, our last show. We're going back to the hotel room. I said, Hannah, what are you gonna eat for, are you gonna order anything? She said, yeah, I'm just probably gonna get room service. I said, okay. So I went to my room, I ordered my room service. It sucked. I'm laying in bed, I'm like, oh, I could order McDonald's right now. It's like midnight. I was like, but you know what? I'm not gonna do that because it's the last tour. And we said this tour, we weren't going to do that.
I wake up in the morning, I go to the airport, I'm talking to my friend Hannah. I say, what'd you end up eating last night? And she goes, I actually got Wendy's.
And I said,
I feel like you just slept with another woman under our roof. You brought her into my bedroom.
And you fucked me. Like you literally, I was, I was aghast. I couldn't.
Okay, when you say it like that, it sounds really bad. Like it sounds like super betrayal.
It does.
And I did have a moment where I was like, I could ask Paige, but I thought, you know what? It's too late. It's too late. I'm jumping in the shower. I can't deal with the admin.
You were on your own timeline.
I go, she's, for all I know, she's ordered McDonald's at this point. You know what I mean? But I do have to say, I was busy, I was very busy all weekend because I had to do sound check.
Oh, oh, you bitch.
We also, can I just preface, we've both, we just got off of the longest flight ever from Salt Lake City.
No, that was the longest flight. I've lit- I, I started to get claustrophobic.
We're, we're not okay. This episode, we're not okay. We're not gonna pretend we're okay, cuz you know what? It's okay to not be okay. But I do have to say, you looked at me and you said, "Are you just doing the sound check every single day? Like, just to be nice?" And I said, "No, cuz I will use it against you, once you come at me for something." And this was that moment. So-
Okay. Wow, you wasted that then.
I feel like-
You could've held that in your back pocket.
This is like the Spider-Man meme.
I didn't tell you, wait, this is another funny thing that happened.
But you didn't tell me?
No, no, no. That I wanted to tell the gig, we're leaving-
I was there.
We're leaving Salt Lake City, and what did I say? Like, we're in the airport, like, waiting to get on our flight back to New York. And what did I say? Like, oh, I was like, "Oh, I got a bloody nose while we were here." I, it mu- I must be so dry from like, flying to all these different places. Like, we're on a plane every single day, and like-
Snorting beta blockers.
No, literally. And Hannah goes, "Well, I didn't wanna tell you, but we're, like, at elevation."
High altitude.
High altitude, and I literally, I stopped dead in my tracks. I said, "Thank fucking god you didn't say that before the show." Because I really feel like altitude makes me so fucking anxious.
Wait, but do you know why I'm so fucking proud of you? Because in Denver, you convinced yourself that you had a panic attack because of the altitude, and that was like, your way of like, avoiding all your problems. And then, fast forward, we're about to go on stage, she forgets her beta blocker. And I know that the altitude is really bad in Salt Lake City, and I'm watching her, just confident, happy, walking on stage.
No, literally, they opened the door, our like, walkout song is playing, and I turn back to Hannah and I go, "Oh my god, I didn't take my beta blocker." And I was like, "Whatever."
And-
I'm super happy I ended the tour. No beta blocker.
We almost didn't have a tour. I don't know if we've fully said that, like, in Denver, we were with our agent, shout out Andrew, and Andrew looked at me and I was like, just tell her, like, I don't give a fuck if she doesn't want to go on stage, like, the gigglers will understand. I'm not gonna force her, like, crying, having a pack attack, to do this. And then we still had, like, fifty more cities to do, and I was like, she's afraid of going on stage. But deep down, I said, she's not afraid of going on stage. She's dealing with some personal demons.
No, I'm a different person. This tour changed me as a woman.
You have gray hairs now?
Literally. I have gray hairs now. The crazy, I feel like that literal sat, like, TikTok sound, like, where did we last leave off?
It's like, you were in a relationship. That's crazy to think that I started the tour in a relationship.
You guys, we finished the tour this last weekend.
Yeah, we did.
The tour?
I feel extremely accomplished.
But it wasn't easy because I don't want to call her out, but I will. Um, Grace.
Yeah, Grace.
Grace.
Conveniently, um, got a kidney stone, which we didn't even know was possible for a girl in her twenties to get. Yeah, the-
Mid twenties.
That was a HIPAA violation we just did.
She said we could say it, did she?
Yeah, no, she, she told us we could. But that's why we had trouble last week getting the episode out. Grace was, um, in the hospital.
No, we're laughing because-
No, it's not funny.
Grace has had, like, a lot of weird, like, she broke her jaw randomly, like, just like, I feel, whoever, okay. Whoever-
Twenty twenty-five.
No, whoever's putting little spells on Grace, we'll find you. We'll find you.
She had a rough couple of months, like, medically.
But I'm really excited because her kidney stone passed and I'm gonna make it into a necklace.
No, Hannah literally thought that Grace was gonna pee out like a pebble, like, that you're, but it's miniscule.
How small do you think it is?
Like, super small.
I feel like it's like a little crystal, like a sprinkle.
A sprinkle is different than a crystal. Like a spr- are you talking like a sprinkle that you put on ice cream?
Regardless, I'm doing something with her kidney stone and it's gonna be iconic.
Um, it- it's- it's already, it's flushed, it's gone. She, it's not with us anymore.
Did you ask her?
I didn't ask her, but I ha- I feel like I have enough common sense to like, to know that. Even though I've never been told that.
I didn't even know girls were- could get kidney stones.
What am I talking about? I watched like twenty seasons of Grey's Anatomy. I'm a fucking doctor.
Can I say-
Pharmacist.
Hot take, I don't understand why they keep putting out shows at a hospital. And like, it's entertaining to people. I don't wanna see people being hurt.
Okay, speak for yourself.
Wait, as I've, literally, all I do is watch murder documentaries, okay!
No, literally, how dare you come for the healthcare community? Hospital shows are some of the best drama, and you wanna know what? I also think, like, knock on wood, not trying to manifest any of this, pray to Saint Anthony. I haven't had to go to the hospital in a while for like, my own self. But I feel like it almost is a little bit of re- reverse psychology, because if I was laying in a hospital room right now, I would immediately think like, okay, so there's definitely people here that are hooking up. Anyone that's taking care of me, do I think is hooking up with someone else? And even like, talking to Sierra, she- she's like, there is always so much hospital drama.
Like, she knew a doctor that was cheating on his wife with a nurse, like, all this different stuff. So, I actually feel like it's therapeutic.
Okay, yeah.
If you have to go to the hospital, just think about like, what is the possible tea that you could be getting?
When you're passed out from something, you turn over to your nurse and you're just like, so who are you?
Give me something.
What's the tea? Like, give me the literal tea. Well, there- there's always gossip going on and like, little fighting of like, of things. I don't, I've actually spent a lot of time in hospitals, knock on wood. As well. Southampton Hospital literally is like, please stay out.
Stop coming here.
Stop coming. How do you keep finding us?
Stop trying your bits on our staff. They're literally working.
I do have to say, the tour was so incredible and I feel so connected to the gigglers right now. Our last show hilariously was in Salt Lake City. We didn't realize our whole show is Mormon jokes.
That's the whole show, but like, but we did, we do have a couple Mormon jokes. You know, who, how could you not? I love the Mormons.
First of all, I was not happy with my outfit because my dress, if I can't wear short dresses because my, my booty hangs out. And I didn't want to upset the Mormons, so I was stressed about that.
Here's why I really appreciate Mormons also. Like, you can make a Mormon joke and they're like, haha, yeah. Like that's, do you know what I mean? Like you can't like make a joke. You can't like make a religious joke and someone be like, haha, that's funny. It's like, no, you probably shouldn't say that. That's like rude. But the Mormons are like, we don't give a fuck.
They love a bit.
Yeah, like they're like, we literally don't care.
Salt Lake City is like an amazing comedy town and like we had so much fun there, but I do have to say, Grace wasn't there for the sound check. I had to do it. And it's like a bunch of old guys that, um, I don't think they were really listening to anything I said.
So then, the beginning of the show, normally Grace goes out and she presses the laptop for our opening video to start.
Video.
So there's this old guy and he's like, I'll do it. And I was like, okay, all you gotta do is press it and it starts.
Press the spacebar. Yep.
So he goes out, he presses it. I guess he might've pressed it twice. Then keeps pressing it. So he starts going through.
Goes through the whole show.
The whole show, the PowerPoint, which part of it is about like a surprise of what's gonna come. So we're watching this, then he.
I'd say the whole thing is a surprise about what's gonna come.
The whole point of a PowerPoint is you don't know what's gonna come next and next slide. That's the fun part. So he looks at us and he kind of looks confused. So we wave him back and I'm like, just press backwards and we'll start this over. So he does that. And it starts and then at the end, I was like, I'm gonna do the worm. Even in my little petite dress, I will figure it out. I'll get my sausage bodies to be held in and I will do it. And we were like, just play the ASAP Rocky song at the end and the DJ like, the guy couldn't play it.
No, he started, I don't know what song he started.
He started playing a song. It worked. It went amazing, but it was like a sign from the universe. I'm like, I think, I think we're good. I think they've had enough of us.
I think we've done this show and we can put it to rest, put it to bed. The Giggly Squad 2024, 2025 tour is completed.
The last seven days, I've been in seven states, which should be illegal.
Illegal.
That's some kind of, I sex trafficked myself.
That's some dr- I was just gonna say, what drugs are you trafficking?
Something got trafficked and it.
We're so on the same brain wave. There was something very nostalgic though of ending the last weekend of tour and it just being me and you.
Like I love Grace, obviously, but like when we first started going on tour, like it was just you and I.
When we first started going on tour, we would get our makeup done every day.
No, that's crazy.
We were like delusional.
You, I've made you, you've made me a little bit more Hannah coded and I feel like I've made you a little more Paige coded.
No, 100% I was freaking out about my outfit last night.
She actually, I'd start freaking out. She looks at me, she goes, I'm gonna be honest with you. There've been so many nights that you've looked so much worse and tonight you're insecure about your outfit? And I was like, what nights are you talking about?
Wait, that is such a Paige sentence if I've ever heard it. I'm like, I'm gonna be real with you. This is not a night to freak out about how you look because I've seen you go out on stage looking way fucking crazier and you not say a peep. Like. So literally reel it in.
Well, you, you started, you used to do.
Meanwhile, I got to run in my tights and I was like, fuck it. I don't give a fuck.
Paige used to do like full fittings for all her outfits and then she saw that I would show up without even trying my outfit on. I, look, I like to live on the edge. So then you started doing that where right before the show in the green room, we try on our outfits.
I never put this on. I've never even tried this on. This could look insane.
We pull out the outfit and pray.
Here's the thing. Look, I love an outfit and like I love giving a look and stuff. But I, I did truly go through a phase this fall where I was like, if I, if someone asks me to put an outfit together and show up somewhere, like I'm gonna cry. Because putting together like 60 looks is, I mean, it's insane.
This is why Steve Jobs had a uniform. We should have had a uniform.
I get it. And I didn't hire a stylist for any outfits for the tour because I was like, I don't know why I did that to myself. It was, I think it was because in my head, I didn't see it as like, oh, we're going on stage and performing. I saw it as like, oh, I'm just like going to hang out with the gigglers. Like if I have a, if I have an outfit that like I repeated or like, isn't that great? Like there are the people that aren't gonna judge me. Do you know what I mean?
A hundred percent. It felt like you're going out to dinner with your friends and if your outfit's bad, they would laugh about it.
Yes, I very much treated it like, oh, well, no, I'm just going out to dinner with my girlfriends because like two days before I'm like, oh, what am I gonna wear in Boston?
Literally.
You know, like, oh, I have this cute dress. I haven't worn it yet. Like I'll wear that. Like, that's how I treated it.
In Portland, I forgot to shave my legs. And I couldn't wear boots with my dress because it wasn't gonna be good and Paige would have hated it. But I got on stage and realized I'm, I'm like a week and a half. Cause I couldn't find my razor and God forbid I asked the hotel for a razor. So I'm in Portland.
I don't think you can ask the hotel for a razor.
Oh girl, you can.
You can?
I mean, it sounds kind of weird when you, you're like, hey, can I have a razor? And they're like, okay.
I've literally only asked for like the toothbrush kit.
I asked for everything. I'm like, can I have help? Can someone help me? This was my karma when I ordered, when I ordered the Wendy's and did not consider Paige in my decision. I jump in the shower and I realized the Wendy's there. So, by the way, this is a five-star hotel. We spoiled ourselves. We're like, we're staying at a nice hotel last weekend. So I'm like, I'm gonna call and see if I could get them to bring it up. So I call and they go, "Yeah, for $5." And I was like, "What?"
Which I actually kind of respect. Why is there something so like little sister coded about that where it's like, "I feel like I just asked my brother to do something." He was like, "Yeah, for $5." And you're like, "Fine."
There was like a six-second pause where I was like, "Okay, touche." I was like, "I don't..." I was like-
No, imagine you were just like, "This is extortion."
I was like-
Like, this is blackmail.
Can you put it on Paige DeSorbo's room? Thank you.
So anyway, I've, and this is the thing, I respect it. I've never seen a hotel do that before. I feel like more hotels should. Make it 10.
Oh my god. If you're in your hotel room and you want something brought up, there's no amount of money-
And you just showered after doing four shows in a weekend?
You're in a robe with a towel on your head? I'll give you my first trial.
But then, part of me is like, "You guys should pay me to not go downstairs in your fancy lobby the way I look right now." So, here we are. We're pointing at each other again.
I would, I would need to speak to a manager. That's the energy I would give in that moment.
Imagine that's where I put my foot down. I go-
That's where you draw the line.
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The only time that I've actually, where I'm self-aware enough to know that I'm a bitch, is like when it comes to travel accommodations. Like if I'm uncomfortable somewhere, I can... I can't like come back from that. So like in hotels, I'm like, no, I want to feel accommodated.
That's where like I need to, I'm becoming more like you because I used to just stay at a super eight.
In this state of the world at this point, no, you can't.
I do think though, traveling gets everyone, everyone's like kind of at their limit, but my thing that.
Right. That's the other thing. Traveling like you're already at your wits end because you're just on alert.
You complimented me the other day of how I deal with um drama on the flight. I giggle. When people are being like crazy. Do you remember the lady who like was trying to walk past me in the aisle?
In any, honestly, this isn't just limited to like traveling. In any confrontation moment, you do like immediately get a smile on your face. Like you do just like start laughing like, okay, today when the airport security was basically like, hey Paige, go fuck yourself.
Like, this was crazy. We're at airport security and the girl goes to me, sorry, the digital ID thing isn't working. You have to move. And I was like, oh, okay. Where do I move?
There's so many lines, like.
There's so many, it's such a long line.
This woman left you for dead and I had.
Left me for dead. She was like, just pop over here. And I was like, but there's an entire line of a hundred people. I'm not just gonna, I can't just budge every person in line. What, like, what do you mean?
So I start laughing because you look so scared and then I start laughing, but then I realized you're like gonna cry. So then I try to speak up and I'm like, this girl needs to get to the front of the line.
But I'm like, I turned to the lady behind me. I'm like, I'm not like getting in front of you. She told me to come to this line and get this woman my ID.
It was becoming like Titanic, women and children first.
It really was. And then I get past that point and I'm like waiting to put my bags in like the machine. And the guy behind me just literally, he was this close to like hip checking me out and he steals my bin. And I just like look back at him and I'm like, oh, okay. I guess I'll just wait for the next one. But like you stole my bin.
No, we're, we're so in um travel mode right now. Everything we talk about, we're like, are you ever at an airport?
It's actually, I'm annoying myself.
I'm not, no, I'm not going to get into the whole bin system, but there's problems with that. I'll, I'll bore myself with that later. Um, one last thing about travel. We did Southwest again. And Southwest, they never, they, they always, um, come through with a good story.
Yeah, for sure they do.
With a good story. They never disappoint in pissing me the fuck off. So, we start.
Wait, I can't even remember what happened.
Oh, I do. I do. I've been waiting to complain about it. So first of all, we're in our lines and people will just like stand somewhere and wait for people to move them instead of like trying to find their number. Also, five people don't even fit between the thing. Anyway, look, I feel, I feel like we're on Survivor and like they're about to vote us off. Like, that's how I feel on a Southwest flight.
That's the energy, it gets.
So anyway, I get on, no drama seemingly, and then midway through the flight, an announcement comes up. And I'm listening, cause I forgot my headphones and I.
I wasn't.
So the announcer comes on and they're peppy, which already annoyed me. There's no reason to be peppy middle of flight. We, we haven't, we haven't landed yet. And she goes, "We're going to Vegas. That's Portland to Vegas," which we were already like, "Who the fuck's going from Portland to Vegas? I don't trust any of you motherfuckers around me." So then, she goes, "I just wanted to make an announcement. We have a birthday on the flight today."
I knew. I was like about to hit REM sleep and she's like, "Hi, we have a birthday on the flight today." She's 21 years old. Give it up for so and so. So like, people start clapping and I'm like, "Okay, like, fine, whatever." And then she goes, "So now let's sing along." That's assault.
That's crazy behavior.
If I was the girl, that's my worst nightmare. A group of people that I don't know singing me happy birthday.
A bunch of like, old people who hate their kids who are going to Vegas to just like, bet away their, their retirement savings.
I feel like that 21-year-old didn't ask for that.
No, no, no. Uh, it, there, it was, no, there was something weird going on. And middle of the flight to do that, I feel like is illegal.
It was also at a weird time, yeah.
It was like the middle of the flight. I had my headphones on, obviously, watching my iPad, like minding my own business. And the only time I noticed was when I heard people singing and I just looked around and I was like, what's everyone singing? And they did cut it short. They did one verse, because no one was paying attention. Yeah, no one committed.
Also, everyone either just woke up from a deep peaceful slumber. Unless if there's turbulence, or like we have to like, open the door to jump out, there's no reason, ever.
To come over.
And you know how I feel about the airplane people practicing their bits on the mic, like.
And you really love singing, so like, you're always down to break out into song.
No.
But not that.
Only when I'm, when I have a microphone with the gigglers, do I like to sing. Otherwise, I, I'm not a group, I'm not, I was never good in groups. Like, you know, when people harmonize, I don't fuck with that stuff.
You're not into a flash mob.
I'm a solo performer.
You're a soloist. That, yeah. No, we get that. We totally get that.
Any other notes from tour? Anything across your desk from tour?
No, you're such a solo, wait, I will say this. You're such a soloist that literally, our tour ended with you doing the worm and me sitting in my chair, clapping. Like, and if that doesn't describe who you and I are to our core, and like, describe our friendship, I really don't know what else does.
I was thinking, because you talked about in the green room yesterday, how like, we haven't gotten in one fight on tour. And like, it's not like our lives have been just like peaceful these last six months. There's a trillion, but like, like, there's nothing, besides the Wendy's, that really.
And it put me over the edge. And you want to know what? And it was my final straw. I literally said to my mom the other day, I was like, I really haven't been having that good of a 2025. And she goes, Paige, it's March. And I go, exactly. And I thought, exactly. My 2025 has been subpar at best. And she was nervous for me. And you want to know what? I'm right there with her. Like, I said, and yet I will persevere. Thank you.
We will persevere. And so will you guys. And I'm sorry, we're not drunk right now. We just are delirious. We haven't, we haven't taken a break and. In weeks at this point, but we have this weekend free. What are we going to do?
Which I can't, I can't express to you how excited I am to have, this is like our first weekend. Truly Friday at like 5pm to Sunday. I got nothing. I got nowhere to be, no plans, no, no one. Hitting my line for anything, you know? Do you want to know what I've preemptively done?
Yes.
I've ordered all the face masks that I keep getting TikToks about.
Oh.
I ordered them all.
Can you, can you do a TikTok or at least some stories telling us like, can you tell if a mask is actually good or not? Like, how do you decipher if a face mask was worth the like $12 you had to spend on it or whatever?
Okay, well, I just ordered a ton of different ones on Amazon, like a Meta Cube something like, put on your sleep tear away, whatever. I ordered all of them. I do like my sleep in ones, like my overnight ones. That's on my list, so I'm going to try a bunch of different face masks because I have a cystic pimple on my chin that's literally ruining my life. Here's how I also know I get, how my body's getting, no, this is a stream of consciousness. You thought it was a podcast? You can't get a word in.
I love it. Someone, shut me up. Shut me up, please.
How I know I'm getting run down and my body physically, it's taking a toll is I get a cystic pimple. I get multiple in a row. This is my third week, different pimple, different.
Wait, I don't mean to be mean, but you have like three right now.
Fuck you, first of all.
I just want the viewers to understand the scope.
Second of all, I have one right now. This is a normal pimple over here and this is just a red mark. This isn't even a pimple anymore. This is the remnants of what was a pimple. Okay, so come correct, first of all.
Wait, can we start saying come correct more?
Yeah, come correct. If you want to speak to me and so I'm doing that this weekend. I'm also, I have three, three important closets in my home. Well, one is a full room and then the other two are really significant to my life. And I'm going through all of them.
What, like you're donating stuff for like reorganizing?
I don't know. I'm reorganizing.
Okay, okay.
Because there's, I can see things on hangers that I'm like, I fucking hate that. Why is it still hanging there? You know, and then also like it is, the seasons are kind of changing a little. Not that I'm bringing out any summer stuff. I'm not crazy. But I do have like a closet that's just dedicated to winter coats that could really get, take a look.
I believe in manifesting the next season. So you just start dressing like it and then you hope that with some global warming. And next thing you know, it's spring.
It'll just catch on.
This is such a good natural transition, which we never have segue. Cause every now and then I get an email. This one's from refiner 29 and it says like, these are the hottest fashion trends for 2025 that are going to dominate. And I go, okay, well, let me run it by my best friend Paige, who like knows these things to see if you guys are right.
I love, I love when you as a consumer, you specifically, not other people. I don't care. You specifically. When you decide to take things so literally, you're like, oh my God, they put the list out of the top five things. It's like every publication has like, this is a 10 things that you, and it's like all different all the time. It's just capitalism at its finest. But I love when you take a certain list from a random email and you're like, this is.
Do you remember how mad I was that like red was a thing? And I'm like, you can't just like make a color that everyone always wears like.
Yeah, it really pissed me off.
I also, I'm like obsessed with how the industry just like lists things and sees what catches on to make people spend their money more. My one note before I tell you guys what the trends are that are upcoming and you spend all your money on it is. Yeah, you think you need stuff, but try to, what helps me is think like, this is so corny, but like Marie Kondo, does it spark joy? Like, you know, you buy stuff because you think you need it, but it doesn't like excite you. That's the same stuff that you're never going to wear.
Yeah, but you can't say that to like a fashion girly. You know, like, our brains are different in terms of... I just noticed that I put the wrong light bulbs in my...
Cancel the pod.
Wall sconces.
Sorry, that was the most thirty-two-year-old thing I've ever said in my life. Like, wait, the light bulbs in my wall sconces are all wrong and I just noticed. Um... Fuck, what was I saying? Oh, you can't say that to like a fashion girlie, cause like...
Yeah, but fashion girlies, you don't have to buy everything.
No, we, no, we don't. But like, I get, here's one thing I will say. I, one of like my biggest criticisms from like people, really that don't matter, but like something I've seen a lot over time is like, Paige isn't fashionable, she's trendy. And I don't even actually take that as an insult because I'm like...
They called you trendy.
I really don't even know what that means.
No one's called me trendy before, just so you know.
But like, yeah, I do, I do like being trendy because I hate feeling like I'm out of style, like, oh, people were wearing that, like, so it's out of style or whatever.
But then, I feel like people describe your style as classic elegant chic, which I would say is timeless.
Thank you so much. But I will say, I do like trying, like, okay, perfect example. A trend for spring that I, that is so not me, that I'm really excited to try, is like a Khloe, like the brand Khloe. They're like, nostalgia's coming back, like, flowy shirts, like very boho thing. Remember that, remember that movie, um, that Lindsay Lohan was in, like Georgia something?
Yes, yes.
Okay, remember how she wore like flowy, like, white dresses? She was like very Khloe-coded in that movie? That's like very in for the spring. And like, I never dress like that. And so like, yeah, I'm definitely gonna buy something that looks like that and try it.
See, I wanna dress like Blake Lively in It Ends With Us. Too soon?
Too soon.
No, wait, I actually love you and boho, boho flor- florily, sorry, I can't speak right now.
Florily?
Floral.
I'm the same way, though, like, I see trends and I didn't even realize I like certain things, like, I'm obsessed with camo. Who knew?
Yeah, you love it.
Who knew this Brooklyn girl loves camo so much?
Is that really like a trend for you, though? Because I feel like you've always worn camo.
Hmm, I didn't do it until I saw some other people do it. I didn't invent camo. I know you guys think I do.
You, you were influenced.
I was influenced. Okay, are you still upset about your sconces?
No, no, no, I'm no.
But it will be, it will be on the top of my, it will be dealt with tomorrow morning, yes. I will be writing that down in my to-do list.
Paige is obsessed with her to-do list right now.
No, I'm always obsessed with my to-do list.
Okay, spring twenty tw- twenty twenty-five trend?
Oh, you almost said twenty twelve and man do I wish.
Man do I freaking wish, twenty twelve?
Actually, no.
Twenty twelve, I peaked.
Twenty twelve, I was a senior on my tennis team and I was so tired.
Twenty tw- in college?
I mean, I was, I was the captain, so I got to boss people around, but honestly, it was more like babysitting all the freshmen.
Oh, my god, twenty twelve.
Also, I had a long-distance boyfriend. I was, like, ready to graduate. I was like, let's go, let me get to New York.
I think I was dating one of my favorite ex-boyfriends and, like, I think I was just living my life.
Where do you think it took a turn for the worst?
If I had to pinpoint it?
This pod just goes super dark right now.
You're like, I thought we were gonna be talking about capris and crop trench coats. Like, is crop trench coats on that list?
Probably. Okay, you ready? Spring 2025 trend, pantaloons.
What the fuck does that mean?
I thought you would. That's what I was asking you. It's basically like flowy pants that like go in at the ankle, which I hate. Um, it makes, it's, no, okay. I mean, I appreciate it comfy pantaloons. You know, it's a little bit pajama-y, a pantaloon. I like comfort. I don't hate it. I just feel like pantaloon is a weird word. Okay, next trend. Textural floral tops à la Blake Lively.
Textured floral tops, like, okay, I know what you're talking about.
Yeah, like just like flowers on them, which that's been styling. And like floral dresses. Okay, this one I actually love. Modern lace. So it means just like lace. But with, with, but like in different ways.
This is my thing though with lace. Sometimes it can be itchy.
Here's my thing. Actually, I would say I have a very hot take on lace.
Do it.
And I really don't want anyone coming for me.
The lace community?
I, the lace community, but I might, I might offend like a small subsect of gigglers and I'm nervous about it, but I have to speak my truth. I think that lace sometimes can read really old lady-ish in certain like situations.
I thought you were gonna say the opposite. I thought you were gonna be like lingerie.
Oh, like it can be like tacky and trashy. Yeah, it can also lead to that, but I, I, I'd rather be trashy and tacky than like age myself. Oh my god. But here's my really controversial take. I don't like white lace in a wedding dress. Anywhere on a wedding dress. That's when I think it, it turns matronly. And like old lady-ish. And like, I, like, I'm
again, I'd have to see a specific dress to let you know, but the, like, the majority of dresses, like wedding dresses I've seen that have like a lace situation, I'm never usually a fan.
I feel like my dress did.
Did it?
Wait, I literally can't remember your dress.
Do you know what's so crazy?
I didn't?
I was like not in my fashion era yet. Don't remember like anything about my dress. I know my, my second dress was like Alex Perry, long sleeves.
I can see your sec- I can see the silhouette of your wedding dress. I can't tell you specifically.
So my first dress was, it had lace over the white, but like it wasn't, you couldn't really see the lace. It wasn't a lot of lace.
Yeah, you had to be up close.
Yeah, so like-
To know it was lace.
So anyway, just feeling attacked.
Okay, sorry. Oh my god, did I, did that offend you?
I literally didn't even remember. Okay, long utility shorts. They really want long shorts. It's giving almost cargo pants, cargo shorts.
Okay, I unpop, again, not an unpopular opinion, but different for me, I think. I love a long short. I think they're so cool.
This is my problem. I have such a small space between my knee and my ankle. Like I have very small, um, shins. So sometimes it can make me look like I have no legs. And my torso looks like insane.
See, I have a short torso, so like-
Yeah, like if I were you, I'd wear it every day. Every day. Okay, I feel like you're gonna love this one. Organza.
Orga- organza?
Garbanzo.
Yeah, I was literally just gonna say, "Orangenti." Why did you just say that?
Sorry, I'm at that.
Inviting all of us to our Italian restaurant.
Organza.
Yeah, like, yeah, organza.
Yeah, organza. It's basically lace, but without all the like-
It's, it's tulle, like, like, it's like big, yeah.
Knit sets, which literally like you wore this yesterday.
Yep.
You wore that yesterday, um-
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Hey, what's up, guys? It's Haley Bailey. Okay, I need to tell you about something. I just got YouTube Premium. It's got tons of awesome features like offline downloads, so I can download my favorite videos before I travel and watch them whenever I don't have Wi-Fi. Because we all know airplane Wi-Fi is the worst. I get ad-free, I get backroom play, and there's like a ton more in there. You should try it. If you like YouTube, you'll love YouTube Premium. Try it now for two months free at youtube.com/premium. Trial eligibility varies. Terms apply. Cancel anytime. That's a mouthful.
I drank so much... Okay, I didn't drink any coffee today. And so I had the craziest headache, and I got home and I ordered the biggest Starbucks they make. I'm shaking.
See, I got a chai latte because I wanted to sleep tonight, but you're on one right now.
No, I'm on one. I've been talking really fast, too.
I'll say I like it.
Maybe I should just drink a venti before every pod and tell you how I really feel.
I love it because everything's a hot take, even when it's not. You're like, "Hot take! I drank your coffee."
Wait, can I call you out again?
On? It depends.
Well...
I don't know how much I could take.
So I'm...
And Tori Page was also, she was doing all these different routines cuz she like, again, was not like facing the reasons why she was having panic attacks. Like she thought it was cuz of the altitude. Then she thought that like if she didn't have her-
I was giving everyone the benefit of the doubt.
But you, you were like, if I don't have my Stanley on stage, I'm gonna have a panic attack. And I'm like, that's putting so much pressure on Stan. And also like, it's not what you're putting, doing right. Like it's not that serious. And she'd be like, we have to go back to my tower. I forgot Stanley. And I was like,
Who walks on stage with the biggest-
With a Stanley.
Weapon?
Me.
So then, the other day, she's sipping her Stanley on stage. And then she looks at me, there's like 20 minutes left of the show. And she looks at me like scared. And she goes, "I have to pee so bad." And I'm looking at her-
I must pee my pants. I literally almost pee my pants.
Why are you drinking 40 ounces of water every show from your Stanley?
Because Hannah, I get, when I talk on stage, I'm also nervous. So my mouth gets drier faster. And I would, I would drink through just one cup of something. So I had to get innovative cuz, and I can't drink room temperature. Like your friggin palate, okay? I need ice. I need ice cold liquids. So insert my friggin Stanley.
Wait, did you just say I have the palate of a four-year-old?
Well, you'll like drink anything.
True. Except water.
Yeah, you'll drink anything but water.
Okay, I don't know what this is. Chartreuse?
Yeah, it's a green.
Can you spell chartreuse?
It actually is like charcuterie.
Yes. It's, it's actually the same thing. It's the same thing. And-
Actually, it's the color of a pepperoni.
Okay, this, oh, it's a hue. Oh, it's a color. I thought it was a texture.
Wait, oh, no.
No, it's a color green.
Is that the color of the season? Chartreuse?
Chartreuse?
It's basically like a, a bright pea green, I feel like.
I actually enjoy chartreuse. I bet you look good in chartreuse.
Thank you. You sounded fucking rich saying that. Chartreuse.
Yeah. Wait, which, wait, brings me to something I want to talk about.
I watched the Meghan Markle show on Netflix. Well, I only watched the Mindy Kaling one.
Can I stop you? Can I stop you? Meghan Sussex.
Meghan Sussex. I went on, then I went on TikTok after. People that are just hate her. I'm like, she's just, she's literally making a breakfast parfait for her friend. What are we really mad about? Like, people were like, really hating it. Now granted, I only watched the one episode because I literally fell asleep, but I wanted to see Mindy Kaling. She made the cutest little breakfast parfait and frittata and they like, talked about her frickin berries in her backyard. I don't know what people could have possibly been mad about.
No, people love to hate, but I do have to say, I turned it on around like 11. It put me in the nicest sleep. Her, her delicate voice. I don't know what it was, but that shit, 10 out of 10. I highly recommend. You want to watch TV, but you don't want, but you want to go to sleep and you don't want to keep it up. And you're like, you're kind of over the murder documentary, even though some of them, they really put me to sleep. But this was perfect. Primetime, like right before you go to bed. It was, was she trying to do kind of like a Martha Stewart type thing? Or more relatable, being like, I don't really know what I'm doing, but I like, I'm rich.
But also, I don't mind that she's, I don't want her to be relatable.
I want to see like different rich people things and I'm like, never seen that before. That is some crazy rich people shit. Like a full farm in her backyard. Like, yeah, she makes jam. Because you want to know what? She has the time to be making jam and I want to watch people that have the time. Time to make jam. Like, I wasn't mad about it.
It's interesting that she like wants to work. I mean, I personally love it and like you forget that she's.
Oh, like it wants to make a TV show?
Yeah, like as and I don't mean work, like, like do anything. I'm saying more like she's putting herself out there to be ridiculed by so many people. She doesn't have to do that, but she's doing it. And part of me is kind of like, you go, girl. If you enjoy it.
Yeah, live.
Live your fucking life. Make that TV show.
Frickin' life.
And like, so I support that. Um, can you, I'm behind. Do you want to tell me about the Alabama Bad Baby stuff going on?
I love Bad Baby. Well, here's the thing. I don't really know like how deep they're like it goes. Because again, it's like they're kids. So I'm like, I, I don't, I don't really know.
You're actually like a version of Bad Baby, like last month when you kept saying, I'm outside, I'm outside.
I was in my Bad Baby era.
Catch me outside, how about that?
That was you all over social media.
So you and Bad Baby are the same.
And then they said, go inside. And I said, no, you're right. No, you're right. I'm actually better suited here. Um. No, I wanted, I wanted to sound big, bad and tough. And then I had like one, two AM night and I was like, what am, who am I fooling? I'm in the house. I'm in the house and I'm in the house bored.
Catch me, catch me inside. How about that? So what's going on? Like, I actually know nothing.
From what I could like gather from the TikToks I've been like fed about it is basically they were friends at one point. And then Bad Baby caught her, either her boyfriend or her baby daddy, like going to Alabama's house. And I don't know if they hooked up or whatever. And so then Bad Baby was just like, you were my friend, like, and now whatever. So she puts out this diss track that is just one of the best songs ever. I can't stop singing it in my head, like anywhere I am.
Oh, wow. I have to check it out.
And then Alabama put enough, put one out and then I think Bad Baby put another one out.
We support women in the arts.
Bad Baby's made like a hundred million dollars or something crazy.
Yeah, and I think she has OnlyFans too.
Oh. Okay, that makes sense. Cause I was like, wait, she put that much music out that I like missed that she like became that rich? But okay, that makes sense.
Look, anyone that pops off starting on reality TV and then becomes
a respected artist.
Oh, cause she's on Dr. Phil, yeah.
She's on Dr. Phil.
No, are you kidding? Gucci flip flops is one of the best songs ever.
A hundred percent. Um, well, I love that the girls are making good music out of it. That's really, at the end of the day, love wins, right?
Okay, wait.
No, love literally wins.
Oh wait, I have one other hot take about spring fashion.
Okay.
And I don't know if this is like, cause I like love my dad or something, but I I love a loafer. Like, like not a moccasin, cause moccasins, my wide ass feet will slide right out.
Not a moccasin.
I want, you remember, did your dad wear those like?
A penny loafer?
I think it's like a penny loafer. Like it's like brown, like leather almost. And it's like, I don't know, there's something about it that's very nostalgic to me. And like girls wearing it, I think is a vibe.
You like, it's your new, it's your new tie?
Arguably, except I do have to, when I dress nice, I have to wear a little heel, cause of my short legs. But again, I've already talked too much about my short legs this episode.
I was gonna say, what, um, what spring trend are like you personally excited about that you think you're gonna try?
Well, what's, the annoying thing about getting older is like, every time I look at what I wore the previous year during that season, I'm like, were you 14? Like, I don't know what it is, like, I'm const, like, I just feel like I, I wanna dress a little more mature. So I say, like a little, a little chicer in a way.
A little more demure.
Arguably. Some would say, would some would say this spring, I may wanna just come correct and see what happens. Um, I actually, you know, I'm gonna pick out my outfit five minutes before every event. You know how I, how I work.
You wanna a sophistication in the air.
Yeah, I definitely like, I, I wanna feel comfortable. Um, I like belts.
I'm into belts right now. I'm into belts and I'm
Multiple belts are in.
Like, like stacking them? Okay, I want to do that. And I also want to wear my ear cuff everywhere. When I tell you guys I've changed since wearing an ear cuff, like, my ear cuffs changed me. And it's pretty much my whole personality.
You ever thought about doubling up ear cuffs?
Capitalism wins again.
Mull it over.
God forbid it's one ear cuff, one belt. No, you gotta stack them.
Then you need to.
Get a ton of them. I do like the belts. It's fun. It's like giving BDSM energy. And I would, I am into tights, but I can't put on a tight without ripping it.
Same.
And the patriarchy wins again. You guys, I don't know how we survived this episode because
No, I'm delusional.
We're like, actually, we apologize. This was insane. Um, but here we are.
Chaotic energy.
Chaotic energy. We're so excited for another fun week with you guys. And the book is about to drop.
In like
It's kind of crazy.
In like about a month. And we finished our audiobook and so that's, that's next on the to do list. Write that down Paige. Um, and we love you guys so much. Thank you for giggling with us and we hope you have an amazing week. Bye.
Bye.
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Hey, it's Hannah and Paige. Thank you so much for tuning into Giggly Squad every week.
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