Ep 272: Jack Whitehall (The Burbs)

Mark and Sam are joined by Jack Whitehall. They get into British pub culture vs. American drinking, darts legends who need vodka to compete, ultra marathons by accident, filming awkward sex scenes, reality show meltdowns, food influencers drowning everything in gravy, and why Shawn Michaels might be the greatest performer of all time. Jack’s new show The Burbs is now streaming on Peacock. Inspired by the cult classic film, the series follows a couple who move into a seemingly perfect suburban neighborhood that quickly reveals some very dark and very funny secrets. It’s a twisted murder-comedy with a stacked ensemble cast, sharp writing, and that perfect mix of suburban paranoia and absurdity. If you like mystery with your jokes and chaos behind white picket fences, The Burbs is for you. Sponsored by: Cancel the stink with BoxieCat Enjoy 30% off with code WMBD https://boxiecat.com/WMBD Start investing with Acorns and get your $5 bonus investment https://acorns.com/wmbd Get simple, online access to personalized care https://Hims.com/DRUNK Start your one-dollar-per-month trial and start selling today https://shopify.com/drunk Subscribe to We Might Be Drunk: https://bit.ly/SubscribeToWMBD Merch: https://wemightbedrunkpod.com/ Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/WMBDClips Sam Morril: https://punchup.live/sammorril/tickets Mark Normand: https://punchup.live/marknormand/tickets ⸻ Produced by Gotham Production Studios: https://www.gothamproductionstudios.com @GothamProductionStudios | Producer: https://www.instagram.com/mrmatthewpeters #WeMightBeDrunk #MarkNormand #SamMorril #JackWhitehall #BoxieCat #Acorns #Hims #Shopify #ComedyPodcast #StandUpComedy #BodegaCatWhiskey Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:07Mark Normand?

  Oh geez, we're talking about the weather. Hello. Hey, everybody. We're here, we're queer, it's We Might Be Drunk. We got Jack Whitehall, everybody.

• 0:14Speaker 01

  Hi.

• 0:15Mark Normand?

  What is that, cashmere?

• 0:16Speaker 01

  A little cashmere.

• 0:17Mark Normand?

  That is scrumptious.

• 0:18Speaker 01

  Hold on, let me get in there.

• 0:19Mark Normand?

  Feel that, that is lovely.

• 0:21Sam Morril?

  Nice.

• 0:22Mark Normand?

  Oh, boy. What a threat count on that. Man, oh, man.

• 0:27Speaker 01

  At any point.

• 0:28Mark Normand?

  Feel this.

• 0:29Speaker 01

  We've tried to get you on the pod before. Wow, that's a little coarser.

• 0:32Mark Normand?

  Sandpaper.

• 0:33Speaker 01

  That's sandpaper.

• 0:33Mark Normand?

  Oh, fuck. This is our self-esteem's coming out.

• 0:36Speaker 01

  Look at great Parmesan with that thing, that's terrible.

• 0:39Mark Normand?

  I think I got this at a thrift store in 88. But, uh, the slacks are nice, too.

• 0:43Speaker 01

  Thank you very much. Yeah, what else you got today? I'm a bit overdressed for a podcast, but I took off some layers. You're not overdressed, we dress like shit on you sometimes. What else you got today? Uh, I just did, um, the Kelly Clarkson Show.

• 0:56Mark Normand?

  Oh, nice.

• 0:56Speaker 01

  She's cool as hell. Yeah, she was very nice, and the Today Show in the morning, which was kinda wild, uh...

• 1:03Mark Normand?

  Al Roker?

• 1:04Speaker 01

  So, Al Roker.

• 1:05Mark Normand?

  Nice.

• 1:06Speaker 01

  Yeah. A bit of Roker, yeah.

• 1:08Mark Normand?

  Thin Roker.

• 1:10Speaker 01

  Thin Roker?

• 1:10Mark Normand?

  He used to be a big guy.

• 1:11Speaker 01

  Oh, I didn't know, big Roker. Oh, really?

• 1:13Sam Morril?

  We were scared for him.

• 1:13Speaker 01

  Oh, I'm glad I didn't know that.

• 1:15Mark Normand?

  Yeah. Pull-up Roker.

• 1:15Sam Morril?

  Roker on Seinfeld, remember that shit?

• 1:18Mark Normand?

  Wow! He was fat, I mean, he was like, it's like an Eddie Murphy character.

• 1:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:24Mark Normand?

  Look at that.

• 1:24Speaker 01

  He looks like he ate Al Roker.

• 1:26Sam Morril?

  I remember him farting at that dinner table.

• 1:29Mark Normand?

  Yeah, look at that. This is pre-Ozepic, by the way, he lost it the real way.

• 1:33Sam Morril?

  No, I think he got surgery.

• 1:34Mark Normand?

  Ah!

• 1:35Speaker 01

  Just re-banned.

• 1:36Sam Morril?

  I think you have to.

• 1:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:38Mark Normand?

  Fuckin'... Quitter.

• 1:40Speaker 01

  Well, this'll all be great fodder for the next time I go. I had no idea.

• 1:45Sam Morril?

  You never told me he used to be fat. How dare you?

• 1:48Mark Normand?

  Well, you know what no one ever talks about? You grow up with a fat guy, and then they lose weight, and it's kind of a bummer. I know him as Fat Roker.

• 1:54Sam Morril?

  I'm glad he's not dead.

• 1:55Mark Normand?

  Well, sure, I don't want him to die, but I think when Oprah lost weight, I was like, "Ah, I like fat Oprah." And Lizzo is now losing weight, and I like fat Lizzo.

• 2:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, but he seemed to still have a sort of avuncular charm, despite the fact that he had shed the pounds.

• 2:08Mark Normand?

  Good point. Some people lose the jolly.

• 2:10Speaker 01

  He had fat man energy.

• 2:11Mark Normand?

  Yes!

• 2:12Speaker 01

  Which is good.

• 2:13Mark Normand?

  FME.

• 2:14Speaker 01

  Yes, FME.

• 2:15Sam Morril?

  I do like when a woman used to be fat.

• 2:16Mark Normand?

  Lava used to be fat, woman. Funny.

• 2:19Sam Morril?

  The personality's definitely, it's better.

• 2:22Mark Normand?

  Agreed.

• 2:22Sam Morril?

  We're hitting it hard for, um...

• 2:24Speaker 03

  The holidays month, the Black History Month again.

• 2:28Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 2:29Speaker 03

  We're doing Oprah fat.

• 2:30Sam Morril?

  You should mention Kirstie Alley, what the hell? Come on, Mark. She's really mentioning. Yeah, that's true, that's why. I wish she stayed fat, Mark, she did, she passed away.

• 2:38Mark Normand?

  Well Kirstie Alley, kudos to her, she was a fat cokehead. That's hard to pull off.

• 2:43Speaker 01

  That's hard to pull off.

• 2:44Mark Normand?

  But I.

• 2:45Speaker 01

  Cause you gotta eat through.

• 2:46Mark Normand?

  Right, what?

• 2:47Speaker 01

  Eat through it.

• 2:48Mark Normand?

  Exactly.

• 2:48Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:49Mark Normand?

  You're not really hungry on the blow.

• 2:50Speaker 01

  That's impressive.

• 2:52Mark Normand?

  Chris Farley as well, fat cokehead.

• 2:54Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but he was doing other shit.

• 2:55Mark Normand?

  True. Hotchy, machy.

• 2:58Sam Morril?

  She's not that fat, she's just an actress, so it's like.

• 3:00Mark Normand?

  Right, right.

• 3:01Sam Morril?

  But like, that's, looks like most women in like, Kansas.

• 3:05Mark Normand?

  That's true, yeah, yeah, that's true.

• 3:08Speaker 01

  It's amazing how it instantly feels more inappropriate once they're dead. I was fine, I was so emboldened.

• 3:15Mark Normand?

  I'm sorry, Kirsty.

• 3:17Speaker 01

  But the minute Kirsty came up.

• 3:18Sam Morril?

  Cheers dude, oh my gosh, she's unbelievable, I love her.

• 3:20Mark Normand?

  She was very sexy, she was in Star Trek.

• 3:22Sam Morril?

  She was hot.

• 3:23Mark Normand?

  Yeah, so pull up a hot Kirsty, if you, if you don't mind, just to.

• 3:26Sam Morril?

  Yeah, let's spread it around.

• 3:27Mark Normand?

  Cleanse the palate a little.

• 3:29Speaker 01

  Oh look, there's a, there's a whole article on famously overweight celebrities that shed their pounds, wow.

• 3:35Mark Normand?

  Oh yeah, cute, cute lady.

• 3:36Speaker 01

  Weird, this also feels disrespectful.

• 3:40Speaker 01

  There's no image of Kirstie Alley that we can look at.

• 3:42Mark Normand?

  You can't win with the ladies.

• 3:44Sam Morril?

  She looks like Pau Gasol in that picture, what the heck?

• 3:47Mark Normand?

  Who?

• 3:48Sam Morril?

  The basketball player, pull him up.

• 3:50Mark Normand?

  Jeez, we're going down a wormhole here. This is why I can't watch internet porn anymore, all of a sudden I'm on a basketball player.

• 3:56Sam Morril?

  She's not?

• 3:56Mark Normand?

  Oh yeah, wow.

• 3:59Sam Morril?

  He's got that peacock look a little bit, no?

• 4:00Speaker 01

  Well, he was really fat as well.

• 4:02Mark Normand?

  No, they have the same, same face.

• 4:04Speaker 01

  No.

• 4:04Sam Morril?

  No, his brother was, his brother Marc Gasol was fat.

• 4:08Speaker 01

  Really?

• 4:08Sam Morril?

  I'm sorry, this is like.

• 4:10Mark Normand?

  We're going on a fat inception.

• 4:11Sam Morril?

  By the way, this is like me on my phone late at night, I'm Marc Gasol, he was fat, let me keep going here.

• 4:15Mark Normand?

  Same, same.

• 4:17Sam Morril?

  Hey, why aren't I writing more jokes?

• 4:20Mark Normand?

  Exactly.

• 4:22Mark Normand?

  Holy, the JD Vance meme.

• 4:24Sam Morril?

  He was fat, but he was a beast. He was really good.

• 4:28Mark Normand?

  Wow, look at the gut on Grizzly.

• 4:30Sam Morril?

  Yeah, dude.

• 4:31Mark Normand?

  Good golly.

• 4:32Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but he lost it.

• 4:33Mark Normand?

  Well, Lucas is pretty fat.

• 4:34Speaker 01

  In the NBA?

• 4:35Sam Morril?

  Yeah, he was big, dude.

• 4:36Mark Normand?

  That's even cooler to me.

• 4:38Speaker 01

  I, yeah, I have so much respect for like elite athletes that are able to do it when they're, they look out of shape.

• 4:45Mark Normand?

  Definitely.

• 4:45Speaker 01

  There was a soccer player called Thomas Brolin.

• 4:47Sam Morril?

  Pull him up.

• 4:48Speaker 01

  Who, again, like, just was not an athlete, but an unbelievable footballer. And he, he played with a beer gut.

• 4:54Sam Morril?

  Oh, my god.

• 4:55Mark Normand?

  Oh, look at that red faced Irish.

• 4:57Sam Morril?

  Was he like a tough guy, like a glue guy, or was he more finesse?

• 5:00Speaker 01

  Yeah. No, yeah, finesse, real finesse. Uh, but, but he played in that era where he was playing against, uh, defenders that were like active alcoholics.

• 5:09Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 5:10Speaker 01

  So it was probably slightly easier to play with a little bit of, carrying a bit of timber.

• 5:14Mark Normand?

  Yeah, well, the John Daly. I mean, golf, golf is a little...

• 5:20Sam Morril?

  And baseball, there are a lot of fat pitchers. I mean, the famous one is David Wells, who just...

• 5:24Mark Normand?

  Look at that tubal arch. My god, that's a problem.

• 5:29Speaker 01

  But then again, even looking at that, you're like, a lot of momentum is going to go to that, I swear.

• 5:34Mark Normand?

  That's true.

• 5:34Speaker 01

  Like, that ball is going a long way.

• 5:36Mark Normand?

  That's true. It helps with the torque on the way back.

• 5:38Sam Morril?

  But he's the type of guy that if he sobered up, he might suck.

• 5:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 5:42Sam Morril?

  Like, he might need that.

• 5:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 5:43Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 5:44Sam Morril?

  It's like how Rodman was like, I, I need to go to Vegas and get fucked up for 72 hours. And they're like, just let him go.

• 5:49Speaker 01

  Darts players as well. There's a lot of darts players that need to be drunk to be able to perform. I once went to a darts championship. Can we pull up Andy Fordham? He was nicknamed the Viking, and I saw him backstage in between, uh, going out onto the oki to like, perform in a, in a darts match, very high level. And he was drinking from a bottle of Evian water.

• 6:12Mark Normand?

  Mm-hmm.

• 6:13Speaker 01

  And I was like, oh, I, I heard that, you know, darts players drink beer. It's like crazy to see you actually drinking mineral water. He was like, it's vodka.

• 6:19Mark Normand?

  Oh, wow.

• 6:21Speaker 01

  The exact amount of alcohol he needed to steady his hand so that he could go out and throw.

• 6:26Mark Normand?

  Look at that guy.

• 6:28Sam Morril?

  Remember the Million Dollar Man from wrestling? He looks like Ted DiBiase.

• 6:30Mark Normand?

  Yeah, he does look like DiBiase, but he died.

• 6:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 6:33Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 6:34Sam Morril?

  Yeah. These stories are really cool, and then you're like, he died at 46.

• 6:37Mark Normand?

  Wait, wait, let me see that guy again. That is unbelievable. Wow.

• 6:42Speaker 01

  Who's that?

• 6:43Mark Normand?

  I bet he got laid, too.

• 6:45Speaker 01

  Could play him.

• 6:46Sam Morril?

  That's our body H Foley.

• 6:48Speaker 01

  He could play Andy Fordham in The Rise of the.

• 6:52Mark Normand?

  Look at the wrist, the poor watch. My god, who does he look like? He's kind of got like a meatloaf or something going on there.

• 7:01Sam Morril?

  Also dead.

• 7:04Sam Morril?

  With the name Meatloaf, you shouldn't have that long a life expectancy, though.

• 7:07Mark Normand?

  That's true. Look at that chubby.

• 7:09Sam Morril?

  Wow, that's fucking insane. He gets there?

• 7:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:13Sam Morril?

  Oh, my god.

• 7:14Mark Normand?

  Wow, now, look at the hair, too. That guy got blown. Isn't that, that's what's great about being a man?

• 7:19Sam Morril?

  Do the darts guys get laid a lot?

• 7:21Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah, they can find the clit. They hit it every time. It's a bullseye, baby.

• 7:28Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:28Mark Normand?

  Look at that.

• 7:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, the darts players. There's a guy called Bobby George, who was like, he was like the sort of the big shagger.

• 7:37Sam Morril?

  I pull a Bobby George.

• 7:38Speaker 01

  Bobby George, he's got a great look.

• 7:40Mark Normand?

  Oh, classic.

• 7:42Speaker 01

  Money.

• 7:43Mark Normand?

  With the necklace.

• 7:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:45Sam Morril?

  Wow.

• 7:46Mark Normand?

  He's a real showman.

• 7:47Speaker 01

  He was like, yeah, the sort of Michael Jordan of darts.

• 7:51Mark Normand?

  He's like a, like a, what do you, gaudy is the word.

• 7:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:54Sam Morril?

  Is that a game you can play forever, or does your wrist start to like?

• 7:57Speaker 01

  No, eventually you have to, so there is like a, yeah, there's a sweet spot, but I think eventually you do have to retire because the wrist gives way or you, you get the shakes too much.

• 8:07Sam Morril?

  Damn.

• 8:07Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah, well, bowling is the ultimate disgusting guy sport. I don't know if you, you guys do bowling over there, do you?

• 8:14Speaker 01

  No, no, no.

• 8:14Mark Normand?

  Okay, we got some bowlers and they are, I'd say the ugliest, most out of shape athletes on the planet.

• 8:20Sam Morril?

  You can eat the grilled cheese while you play.

• 8:22Mark Normand?

  Well, this guy.

• 8:23Speaker 01

  This is the guy, Pete Weber, yeah?

• 8:25Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah, he's the man.

• 8:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 8:28Mark Normand?

  What's the famous, this is the best quote in history.

• 8:30Speaker 01

  At the, uh.

• 8:32Mark Normand?

  Here it comes.

• 8:33Sam Morril?

  This is like Bill Murray at the end of fucking Kingdom.

• 8:36Mark Normand?

  Exactly. Here it comes.

• 8:41Speaker 04

  You think you are high.

• 8:44Speaker 01

  Who do you think you are? I am.

• 8:47Sam Morril?

  Oh, it's so good.

• 8:49Mark Normand?

  God, you could not write that line.

• 8:51Speaker 01

  No.

• 8:51Mark Normand?

  That has gotta be sheer adrenaline pumping, just elation. That's amazing.

• 8:57Sam Morril?

  Do they make a good living like a world-class bowler, you think?

• 9:01Mark Normand?

  I don't think so. I think they do OK. I think like a WNBA player, I bet.

• 9:05Sam Morril?

  That's not a good living.

• 9:07Mark Normand?

  All right, well, then, no.

• 9:11Mark Normand?

  Yeah, wow, that was a great little athlete, ugly athlete run we had there.

• 9:15Sam Morril?

  Well, David Wells for the Yankees had the famous one, because he went out drinking all night, pulls an all-nighter, and then throws a perfect game, which you just don't fucking do. He was a wild guy, this guy. He bought Babe Ruth's hat on auction, and was like, "I want to wear Babe Ruth's hat during the game." Baseball's like, "You can't do that." And he was like, "I'm doing it." And they just fined him, and he wore it.

• 9:37Mark Normand?

  Good for him.

• 9:38Sam Morril?

  He was like, "Hey, I don't give a shit. I want to wear this hat."

• 9:39Mark Normand?

  Yeah, it's a hat. What's the difference? I mean, it's a Yankee hat, right?

• 9:43Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but it's like old. I don't know.

• 9:44Mark Normand?

  I see.

• 9:45Speaker 01

  And he would play, like, intoxicated?

• 9:48Sam Morril?

  I don't know if he played intoxicated, but he was hungover.

• 9:50Speaker 01

  He was hungover.

• 9:51Mark Normand?

  And an all-nighter is, that ain't easy.

• 9:53Speaker 01

  No, that is, yeah.

• 9:55Mark Normand?

  Man, what a bad, but it kind of takes baseball down a peg. If you can do this, hungover and on no sleep, and do a perfect game, maybe it's not that hard of a sport.

• 10:06Sam Morril?

  No, it's hard. I mean, you know, but,

• 10:10Sam Morril?

  you know, they were all on coke in the 80s, too. I mean, they were, but that might help you. It's focus, it's adrenaline.

• 10:15Mark Normand?

  Ah, good point.

• 10:16Speaker 01

  Probably good for like one innings.

• 10:18Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 10:19Speaker 01

  It's quite a long game.

• 10:21Sam Morril?

  And he used to start telling stories in the outfield. It was terrible.

• 10:24Mark Normand?

  We should write a movie.

• 10:26Sam Morril?

  It's like Bull Durham meets fucking Major League, man.

• 10:31Sam Morril?

  By the way, we watched Major League. Fucking great movie.

• 10:33Mark Normand?

  Great movie. This is our mascot. Don't mind him. Welcome to Epstein's Island.

• 10:40Mark Normand?

  Wait, what was I gonna say? Shit, that, oh! Speaking of drinking and playing games all night, we've both done London many times and the UK, Wales, all that. It's a real beer culture over there.

• 10:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:52Mark Normand?

  And I'm a liquor guy.

• 10:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:54Mark Normand?

  And I found I got a little, uh, people got a little snickery with the like, the vodka sodas and the tequila soda and all that. And they're like, just drink a beer, you dweeb.

• 11:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, it's a lot of, it's a lot of lager.

• 11:07Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 11:08Speaker 01

  I think that's just because it's, they want to elongate it as well.

• 11:11Mark Normand?

  Ah.

• 11:13Speaker 01

  Just full capacity drinking, all day sessions.

• 11:17Mark Normand?

  Got it.

• 11:17Speaker 01

  Maybe it also feels more acceptable to start with beer.

• 11:21Mark Normand?

  Good point.

• 11:22Speaker 01

  If you're doing it in the day or you're doing it midweek, but yeah, it's a lot of.

• 11:26Sam Morril?

  But there's something fucking cool about a martini at lunch.

• 11:28Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:29Sam Morril?

  There's something epic where you're just like, are we just gonna get fucked up at 2:00 PM? This is crazy. I don't know. But yeah, I'm the same way. I got, I would drink beer over there.

• 11:36Mark Normand?

  I'll do it.

• 11:37Sam Morril?

  Cause I was like, oh, okay. Like Liverpool, I was like, holy shit, these people are the best. I love Liverpool.

• 11:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:42Sam Morril?

  But, uh, yeah, it was a lot of beer.

• 11:44Speaker 01

  It's a lot of beer.

• 11:44Sam Morril?

  And what are those shots they always want to do in Liverpool with those fucking shots called again?

• 11:48Speaker 01

  Jägerbombs?

• 11:48Sam Morril?

  Was it Jägerbombs? It was something like that. It was like a, ah, fuck, I wish I, I don't know. But yeah, uh, do you, do you not drink?

• 11:57Speaker 01

  No, I, yeah, I, I drink.

• 11:58Sam Morril?

  What's your drink usually?

• 11:59Speaker 01

  Not on stage though. Oh, I, I, I will drink anything and everything. I have cocktails, I love whiskey, like a martini, I love red wine.

• 12:07Sam Morril?

  Cause like, there's no way this guy doesn't drink because of that bad teacher show. I was like, I feel like you definitely, like a sober guy's not playing this guy.

• 12:12Speaker 01

  No, I def, yeah, I def, I definitely drink. Not on stage though, I'm, I'm terrible.

• 12:16Mark Normand?

  Me too.

• 12:17Speaker 01

  On stage, so sloppy.

• 12:18Mark Normand?

  Same.

• 12:19Speaker 01

  I just, uh, so.

• 12:20Sam Morril?

  I always think I'm good and then I hear the recording. I'm like, that was not good.

• 12:23Mark Normand?

  Yeah. You're a little step off, you're a little slower. But I watched your Fallon. It's a big drinking chunk.

• 12:29Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, yeah, that's right. Yeah.

• 12:31Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 12:31Speaker 01

  But I do, I, I, that is definitely something that I feel when I go to, well, LA in particular, everything is sort of geared around, you know, going for coffee or going for lunch. And in England, everything is just go to the pub and it's every, every meeting is drinking, drinking at lunch. It's still like, we have a great drinking culture, which I.

• 12:51Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 12:52Mark Normand?

  We used to. We've law, we fizzling.

• 12:54Sam Morril?

  New York's still good.

• 12:55Mark Normand?

  Still good, but you know, liquor sales are down. I think everything's down with young people with the new generation. So you guys are hanging in there like five o'clock at a pub in London.

• 13:04Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 13:05Mark Normand?

  It's just they're, they're like pushing out into the street. There's so many drinkers.

• 13:08Sam Morril?

  Oh, man, that place Devonshire, that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God, that pub. Shoulder, shoulder. Shoulder, shoulder. It's crazy. And they got that great restaurant upstairs, too. That's a cool spot. Yeah, that's great.

• 13:17Mark Normand?

  And the pubs look good. Here you got these dumbass bars with the neon lights and all that. You guys are like, oh, fucking wood and brass bar and the gold rail pubs.

• 13:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, horrendous bar snacks as well.

• 13:30Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 13:31Speaker 01

  Like weird potato chips and pickled eggs and.

• 13:34Sam Morril?

  I like a pickled egg. I like that.

• 13:36Speaker 01

  It's like all feels like a proper throwback.

• 13:39Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 13:40Speaker 01

  I love sitting in a pub and just drinking all day.

• 13:42Mark Normand?

  And there's a crest. There's always a crest of like the sheep's taint, you know, it's always some old, the, the Lord Zanis or whatever. And it's like a, you know, two swords and a, and a, you know, fat lady or something.

• 13:54Sam Morril?

  I just watched this movie last night, which is like, I'm told a British classic. Have you seen Withnail and I?

• 13:59Speaker 01

  Oh, I love Withnail. My favorite movie of all time.

• 14:01Sam Morril?

  Yeah, it's a real drinking movie.

• 14:02Speaker 01

  It's the best.

• 14:03Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 14:03Speaker 01

  I love Withnail and I. That's always my barometer. If I like, wanna test out how much I'm gonna like an American friend. Withnail and I.

• 14:12Sam Morril?

  It's a good flick.

• 14:13Speaker 01

  It's amazing.

• 14:13Sam Morril?

  I had a friend tell me how much she liked it. And then I saw just randomly Will and Epi and like, that's my number one favorite movie in an interview. And I was like, oh, shit, two, I got two in one week. Let me throw it on. I loved it.

• 14:22Speaker 01

  It's so good.

• 14:24Mark Normand?

  What's the, uh?

• 14:25Speaker 01

  Monty, you terrible cunt.

• 14:26Mark Normand?

  Oh, Richard Griffiths. I've seen him before.

• 14:28Sam Morril?

  Yeah. Yeah, it's a good, it's a really good drinking movie.

• 14:31Mark Normand?

  Okay.

• 14:31Speaker 01

  So good.

• 14:32Sam Morril?

  Two really down and out despot.

• 14:33Speaker 01

  The amazing story about that is that Richard E. Grant plays the best on screen drunk.

• 14:39Mark Normand?

  Really?

• 14:40Speaker 01

  He's teetotal and he, he never touched a drop of alcohol.

• 14:44Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 14:45Speaker 01

  But the director Bruce Robinson insisted on getting him drunk once. And Richard E. Grant talks about this night where Bruce Robinson took him out and forced him to drink. So he would experience it once before he started filming. And it's the only time to this day he was ever drunk. But it's honestly the most perfect performance of a drunk.

• 15:00Sam Morril?

  I like a kind of down and out poor character who's still kinda like debonair in a way.

• 15:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 15:05Sam Morril?

  Something very funny about that. Yeah.

• 15:07Mark Normand?

  Kind of like Arthur.

• 15:07Sam Morril?

  Yes. Well, he's not down and out. He was Richard.

• 15:10Mark Normand?

  Oh, that's true. But he was a degenerate.

• 15:11Sam Morril?

  But there was something very sophisticated, like fake sophisticated. Yeah, I love that. Yeah.

• 15:16Speaker 01

  He living in squalor, but he's still got this like. The grandeur about him.

• 15:20Sam Morril?

  Yes.

• 15:21Speaker 01

  Such a funny, it's so good. The script is amazing.

• 15:23Mark Normand?

  Well, you got, I mean, we love British comedy. You got me in a Peep Show.

• 15:27Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 15:27Mark Normand?

  And I've watched it twice now, just through and through. So good.

• 15:31Sam Morril?

  It's, yeah, it's probably like my comfort watch on the road. There's like that, that, Seinfeld, 30 Rock. Somebody I just know will make me feel good.

• 15:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 15:38Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 15:38Sam Morril?

  Sopranos.

• 15:39Speaker 01

  I did, um, a, a show with, uh, Sam and Jesse, who wrote Peep Show.

• 15:44Mark Normand?

  Hmm.

• 15:44Speaker 01

  They wrote a student show after this, which I was in with them. Uh, and the, the scripts are always so good. And then obviously Jesse went on to write Succession.

• 15:53Mark Normand?

  What?

• 15:53Sam Morril?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 15:54Speaker 01

  He's amazing, but the mind.

• 15:56Sam Morril?

  You didn't know that?

• 15:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 15:56Mark Normand?

  No.

• 15:57Speaker 01

  The guy that came up with Peep Show. No, no, no, no, the writer.

• 16:00Mark Normand?

  Oh, sorry, sorry.

• 16:01Sam Morril?

  The guy who wrote Peep Show wrote Succession.

• 16:03Mark Normand?

  I did not know that. I love Succession.

• 16:05Sam Morril?

  It's fucking great.

• 16:06Speaker 01

  He wrote loads of, they basically exclusively wrote comedy. And then he had this show idea, which I think was originally just about the Murdochs.

• 16:12Sam Morril?

  Succession's a comedy, though.

• 16:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, exactly.

• 16:14Sam Morril?

  It's pretty hilarious.

• 16:15Speaker 01

  Comedy like disguised as a drama, but it's so funny. Yeah, they're great.

• 16:19Sam Morril?

  Was that cool working with those guys?

• 16:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, amazing. Like so, so good. And like, just every script was hilarious. Yeah, Jesse Armstrong.

• 16:25Mark Normand?

  How did they know about that world? How did he know about the, that, you know, rich kind of, um, wealthy family?

• 16:31Sam Morril?

  That felt like a combination of, yeah, that book right there. Uh, no, uh, no, God, it looks like the cover. That's why I thought there was that book.

• 16:37Speaker 01

  That was the show I was in there on Fresh Meat.

• 16:39Mark Normand?

  Oh, really? Okay, wow.

• 16:41Speaker 01

  And then, and then Succession. But I think when he originally wrote it, he wrote it and it was just about the Murdochs. And then they had to change a load of stuff.

• 16:48Sam Morril?

  It was Murdochs and then it was, it was like that mix with, there was that book about, uh, the Viacom, Summoner Redstone.

• 16:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 16:54Sam Morril?

  It's a really good book.

• 16:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 16:55Sam Morril?

  It's about Summoner Redstone and his daughter and like how fucked up. So I think it was like a, it was those two books mashed, I think.

• 17:01Mark Normand?

  Hmm. Wow. What a talent.

• 17:05Sam Morril?

  But, uh, yeah, man, you've been all these things. And this new show, The Burbs, on Peacock.

• 17:12Sam Morril?

  And it's like a drama, it's like a comedy, but like kind of a murder comedy, right?

• 17:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, murder comedy.

• 17:17Sam Morril?

  I like a murder comedy.

• 17:18Speaker 01

  Murder comedy, yeah, murder comedy.

• 17:20Sam Morril?

  Well, I like that one on Hulu they did with Steve Martin and Martin Short. That was, that's a murder comedy, right?

• 17:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's that, it's like, it's got, you know.

• 17:27Sam Morril?

  The burbs.

• 17:28Speaker 01

  Kind of, um.

• 17:30Mark Normand?

  It's off the movie.

• 17:30Speaker 01

  Horror as well, yeah, it's the, the, the Tom Hanks movie from the eighties. And then it's like taking the sort of premise of that of like this family moving back to the suburbs and there being like a weird secret on the street and, uh, yeah, it's got a really great ensemble cast and Paul Appel is really funny and, uh, Julia Duffy, Mark Proch. Uh, it's, yeah, it's great, it's, um. We filmed, yeah, filmed it on the original set in the Universal lot where they've, you know, the Munsters house and Desperate Housewives and all of those.

• 18:00Mark Normand?

  Oh, shit.

• 18:01Speaker 01

  So you went to work every day, you were going past like the, the jaws bit where it's scaring all of the tourists and

• 18:07Mark Normand?

  That's great.

• 18:08Speaker 01

  Drive up past the Psycho house and then, yeah, you're at work.

• 18:10Sam Morril?

  They just keep that up, the Psycho house.

• 18:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 18:13Sam Morril?

  Just in case?

• 18:13Speaker 01

  Just in case.

• 18:14Sam Morril?

  Like, we're bringing it back, dude.

• 18:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, we're bringing it back.

• 18:16Sam Morril?

  I know the remake didn't work, we're trying another remake.

• 18:19Mark Normand?

  Vince Vaughn.

• 18:20Sam Morril?

  Vince Vaughn and Norman Bates, that was wild.

• 18:22Mark Normand?

  Baby, your money, come on. Come on, you're not dead, your money, mom.

• 18:28Mark Normand?

  Wow, look at that, but that's fun, that real Hollywood shit.

• 18:30Speaker 01

  It was cool, yeah, and those, uh, those trams with all of the tourists. Every now and again, you'd be going up to set in a little golf buggy and they'd, uh, slow down as they went past you and you'd see all of the tourists looking out and then being really disappointed that it wasn't The Rock or Kevin Hart.

• 18:46Sam Morril?

  You did that movie with The Rock, though.

• 18:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 18:48Sam Morril?

  Was that fun?

• 18:49Speaker 01

  I think they'd rather have seen.

• 18:52Sam Morril?

  But you're acting some big shit now. Well, the, how was, how was it working with The Rock?

• 18:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, good, yeah, he, it was, yeah, he was, he was great, he was really, I mean, I love wrestling, so.

• 19:01Sam Morril?

  Same.

• 19:01Speaker 01

  On day one, I sort of started asking him about, you know, WrestleMania and which wrestlers he liked, you know, working with and which ones he didn't like, well, and he, he opened up instantly because he loved talking about wrestling. Because I guess that's, you know, his passion.

• 19:14Mark Normand?

  Sure.

• 19:15Speaker 01

  I instantly turned myself into a fan, but, uh, that was like safe terrain to, to talk about and trying to get him to.

• 19:22Mark Normand?

  Yeah, that's a tough transition to go from smell what The Rock is cooking to movies.

• 19:28Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:29Mark Normand?

  He was dead.

• 19:30Sam Morril?

  But is it though? It's all, it's all performing. Like he became popular in wrestling because it was, he was the best on the mic.

• 19:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 19:36Sam Morril?

  He was funny.

• 19:37Speaker 01

  He was so good, wasn't he?

• 19:38Sam Morril?

  He was a good performer, you know, and then you test it out.

• 19:41Speaker 01

  He was also in that, like, yeah, that, that amazing era where they could just get away with so much shit. Watch some of the clips from Attitude Era, you're like.

• 19:48Sam Morril?

  Yeah, there was a whole, there was a whole faction of Degeneration X, their, their tagline was suck it.

• 19:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:55Sam Morril?

  I was in seventh grade, like, like you have the tension, I'm like, suck it, we just gotta be like, suck it, get out.

• 20:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 20:01Mark Normand?

  I was my high school mascot. I did that the first game, I got fired. But it was like right in that nineties era. So I was like, come on, the kids love it.

• 20:11Sam Morril?

  Nah, he was the man.

• 20:12Speaker 01

  I mean, that era was crazy. It was crazy. That, um, clip of Shawn Michaels doing the air fellatio.

• 20:19Mark Normand?

  I'll ball that up.

• 20:20Speaker 01

  So.

• 20:20Mark Normand?

  Sexiest man alive.

• 20:22Speaker 01

  That was like the, the product back then.

• 20:26Mark Normand?

  Whoopsie. Oh, Jesus Christ.

• 20:28Speaker 01

  Jesus Christ.

• 20:29Sam Morril?

  You've got to be careful with that.

• 20:31Mark Normand?

  That was a screensaver.

• 20:32Speaker 01

  And you've spelled Shawn wrong, so I think you might have a different Shawn Michaels.

• 20:36Mark Normand?

  Rest, put the word wrestling in there.

• 20:39Sam Morril?

  On TV, not, no.

• 20:41Mark Normand?

  You put BBC in there. Wrong acronym. There we go. That's a meme now.

• 20:46Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 20:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 20:47Sam Morril?

  He did it very well, too.

• 20:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 20:49Sam Morril?

  He really nailed the, the ball tickle and everything.

• 20:53Mark Normand?

  Guys.

• 20:53Speaker 01

  There's an answer to that.

• 20:55Mark Normand?

  He's a huge cock, too.

• 20:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 20:57Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 20:59Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. Oh, wow, yeah.

• 21:01Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 21:01Mark Normand?

  Skin flute. Holy moly, look at this guy.

• 21:07Sam Morril?

  I think he's blowing the big show. That's a big dick.

• 21:10Sam Morril?

  Jesus.

• 21:11Speaker 01

  Oh, my God.

• 21:13Sam Morril?

  Yeah, wrestling, that, I, I haven't watched it really in a while, but like, growing up, I, I, that shit was so fun.

• 21:19Mark Normand?

  Super fun. Send that clip to my wife.

• 21:22Speaker 01

  Just send the other Shawn Michaels one to mine, please.

• 21:26Sam Morril?

  Oh, God. We, we play this every week now. I'm not a fan of this.

• 21:29Mark Normand?

  You gotta get some new material.

• 21:30Sam Morril?

  This is literally.

• 21:32Speaker 01

  He's like a morning DJ now. It's like, I'm doing it for our guests.

• 21:35Sam Morril?

  Wow.

• 21:36Mark Normand?

  He's fine. He doesn't care. Uh, we're trying to get on heated rivalry.

• 21:45Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 21:45Mark Normand?

  How about that Kiki Palmer? She's a sight for sore eyes, yeah.

• 21:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, she's great.

• 21:50Sam Morril?

  I remember seeing her in Akela and the Bee when she's a child actor.

• 21:53Mark Normand?

  Geez.

• 21:54Sam Morril?

  It's a great movie.

• 21:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 21:56Mark Normand?

  Did you have a lube out for that?

• 21:58Sam Morril?

  Mark, it's a fucking heartwarming tale about a spelling bee.

• 22:00Mark Normand?

  I've never heard of this, Akela and the Bee.

• 22:01Sam Morril?

  It's Laurence Fishburne.

• 22:03Mark Normand?

  Ah, okay.

• 22:04Sam Morril?

  It's about a child, a child doing the, uh, spelling bee. It's a good movie.

• 22:08Speaker 01

  I went and did a, um, a, like a, like a chemistry test with her. They flew me out to Atlanta to do a screen test and I'd never met her before and I was just being a little bit nervous. And went into the room and I thought, you know, a little icebreaker would be that I tell her that I loved Akela and the Bee and, you know, really moved me. I was, you know, floods of tears by the end when you're doing the bit. You seriously, if you don't tear up a little in that movie, you're kind of a cunt, I think.

• 22:31Mark Normand?

  Did she lose to an Indian kid? Cause that would be the only realistic ending of a spelling bee.

• 22:35Sam Morril?

  I haven't seen it in a minute.

• 22:36Speaker 01

  I think she wins. She wins.

• 22:37Mark Normand?

  All right, it's fiction.

• 22:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'd watched it on the plane on the way over. I think she was.

• 22:42Mark Normand?

  Smart.

• 22:43Speaker 01

  I was talking about like, watching it as a child, but I was watching it as a grown ass man.

• 22:47Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 22:48Speaker 01

  The, the day before and in floods of tears on an aeroplane.

• 22:52Mark Normand?

  Did she appreciate it?

• 22:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 22:53Mark Normand?

  Okay.

• 22:54Sam Morril?

  No, it was on TV recently and I was watching parts and I was like, yeah, you tear up. It's like a feel-good movie for sure.

• 22:58Mark Normand?

  All right, I'll put it on.

• 23:00Speaker 01

  It's a good one.

• 23:00Mark Normand?

  Don't watch it on a plane. No, I won't.

• 23:02Speaker 01

  Cause you just fucking blab at everything.

• 23:04Mark Normand?

  The Lolila jet you were on?

• 23:07Sam Morril?

  Lolila?

• 23:08Mark Normand?

  I've been drinking.

• 23:11Sam Morril?

  Lolila.

• 23:11Mark Normand?

  Lolila. I couldn't get it out. I've never been on the plane. I don't know.

• 23:17Sam Morril?

  Oh, is that what it's called?

• 23:18Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 23:20Sam Morril?

  Oh, I, yeah, I didn't know. I haven't been on it.

• 23:23Mark Normand?

  Not an expert on the jet.

• 23:24Sam Morril?

  Do you, have you, you ever have to read with someone where you watch them and they're in and you're like, this was a piece of shit?

• 23:29Speaker 01

  What, as in, are you going in?

• 23:30Sam Morril?

  Yeah, going to like work with someone?

• 23:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 23:32Mark Normand?

  Well, every rock movie, baby. What are we doing here? I like the rock, I'm just saying.

• 23:38Sam Morril?

  He is a great, he's a great performer though.

• 23:40Mark Normand?

  He is, he is. He's a beast. I think the first black wrestler pro? No, it's not true. He broke some record, the big black.

• 23:50Mark Normand?

  His father was a wrestler. I know, but maybe first WWE. I think he broke a color barrier in some way.

• 23:57Sam Morril?

  Coco Beware was a wrestler in the eighties.

• 23:59Mark Normand?

  Coco B, that's the movie with Kiki Palmer. Alright, well look up The Rock, uh, Black, Breaking Barrier. I swear to god, I saw his documentary.

• 24:08Sam Morril?

  Rock, Breaking.

• 24:10Mark Normand?

  Oh god.

• 24:11Sam Morril?

  This is gonna be porn again.

• 24:12Speaker 01

  You've not been the same since they brought out that clip of you two making out. Sent you into somewhat of a tailspin.

• 24:17Mark Normand?

  Shut up, I had my boner here.

• 24:19Sam Morril?

  Oh, first black champion.

• 24:21Mark Normand?

  Thank you.

• 24:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:22Mark Normand?

  Alright, alright. See you guys are quick to white guilt me. And...

• 24:27Sam Morril?

  Fucked up dude.

• 24:28Mark Normand?

  I've seen the doc. Alright, first black champion.

• 24:32Sam Morril?

  Yeah, that's big.

• 24:33Mark Normand?

  That's big.

• 24:33Sam Morril?

  That's big, that's big.

• 24:34Mark Normand?

  Alright.

• 24:35Sam Morril?

  That's pretty cool.

• 24:36Mark Normand?

  Uh, but yeah, Kiki Palmer was in Aziz's movie, which is, I think, pretty good, actually. Good, it's called Good Fortune with Seth Rogen.

• 24:42Sam Morril?

  I gotta watch that, fucking, I ran into him, I'm embarrassed I haven't seen it.

• 24:45Mark Normand?

  Nah, I saw it on a plane.

• 24:46Sam Morril?

  But it's fun, right?

• 24:47Mark Normand?

  But it's fun, it's like, it's deep.

• 24:49Sam Morril?

  Keanu Reeves?

• 24:49Mark Normand?

  Yeah, it's funny, Keanu Reeves steals it, by the way. He's so good. He's great. But it's a great premise, it kinda breaks all the, breaks the mold a little bit. Very good. But she's the, she's the love interest. So she's now hooking up with an Indian guy, then a white guy, so she's, uh, all over the place with the male leads.

• 25:09Sam Morril?

  Called being an actor.

• 25:12Mark Normand?

  Good point.

• 25:13Speaker 01

  Yeah. Being an actor is just professional hoeing.

• 25:17Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 25:17Speaker 01

  Well, I, I am...

• 25:18Sam Morril?

  Do you feel any vibes, I'm said, ever, you're like, oh, this is, this could be something?

• 25:22Speaker 01

  No, I don't.

• 25:23Sam Morril?

  No?

• 25:23Speaker 01

  It just feels so on, like, even when you're, you know, doing the scenes where you have to, like, make out, it just feels so unsexy.

• 25:31Sam Morril?

  Sure, tell me about it, you see us before, that was brutal.

• 25:37Sam Morril?

  You know, it's, it's weird, right?

• 25:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, on the last thing I, oh, the show I did, I had to film, um, a gay orgy, which was, I mean...

• 25:48Mark Normand?

  Wait, what?

• 25:48Speaker 01

  Bring it on.

• 25:49Sam Morril?

  What, what show is this?

• 25:50Speaker 01

  I did a show called Malice on Amazon, where I played this sort of, like, psychopath, who was into some really deviant, like, sexual stuff, and so...

• 25:59Sam Morril?

  Oh, so you're not enjoying it?

• 26:00Speaker 01

  Sorry?

• 26:01Sam Morril?

  You're not enjoying the gay orgy?

• 26:02Speaker 01

  No, no, he's just sort of there, like, zoned out, so I didn't have to, like... Yeah, I didn't have to enjoy it.

• 26:07Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 26:08Speaker 01

  But I did have to film it. It was at a strip club in Watford. We filmed at sort of eight o'clock in the morning. I don't know whether there's gonna be any se- oh. No, no, that's David.

• 26:16Mark Normand?

  Oh, get that right side out of there. That's a shot of me in my house. But, oh, what the fuck are you doing, man?

• 26:23Speaker 01

  There's so many dicks on this podcast.

• 26:25Mark Normand?

  He's got a problem.

• 26:26Speaker 01

  It's a lot.

• 26:27Mark Normand?

  They, they autofill for him.

• 26:28Speaker 01

  Well, they actually.

• 26:29Mark Normand?

  They're typing.

• 26:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's what he's doing at eight o'clock in the morning usually.

• 26:34Mark Normand?

  Yeah, right.

• 26:36Speaker 01

  Well, they edited out the most graphic stuff. Ah. So it, it didn't actually end up in the show. Well, the most graphic stuff is there's a sequence where I'm like watching some people participate in sex. And this old dude comes and takes me by the hand and leads me off. And then it hard cuts to him shoving me up against the wall and fucking me from behind.

• 26:52Mark Normand?

  Oh, wow.

• 26:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:53Mark Normand?

  Love a hard cut.

• 26:54Speaker 01

  So you're filming.

• 26:57Speaker 01

  Eight o'clock in the morning, this guy, he had like, he had like a sort of cushion, like duct tape round his, his waist. And the, the weirdest bit was not the actual like, you know, bombing. The part that you like it. I went to boarding school, you know. Shut your eyes and go to a happy place. But it was like that sort of small talk in between. And at one point he was like, oh, I was just wondering whether at some point I could get a selfie. And I was like. Maybe we wait till like post orgy for the selfie because I suspect you haven't got your phone on you. I hope you have. He was like, oh, it's just that my son's a big fan of yours. I was like, I don't think he's gonna be a fan after he sees this, mate.

• 27:35Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 27:36Speaker 01

  Were you naked in this scene? Yeah, I was naked, yeah. Fully naked? I had a, a part, like a cock sock on. Oh yeah, that's me entering the orgy.

• 27:42Mark Normand?

  Wow, looking good.

• 27:43Speaker 01

  Oh yeah, yeah, you're gonna see the guy.

• 27:45Mark Normand?

  You know what the greatest invention of all time is? Plumbing. You flush, it's gone. That's it. Problem solved. Meanwhile, cats are still living in 1840 with a sandbox in the corner. That's true.

• 27:56Speaker 01

  And they don't think women are people.

• 27:58Mark Normand?

  They can't vote. Here's the thing, the worst part about having a cat isn't the scratching or the zoomies, it's the litter box. But Boxi fixed it. Boxi Pro, the Pro stands for probiotics, which stops the bacteria that causes odors, so you never smell your litter box ever again. And I'm not talking about the masking smells with perfume. Boxi Pro keeps the box continuously odor-free infinitely. Just remember to scoop. All you need to do is top off the litter and you never have to dump out the whole box. Plus, it has an amazing clumping powder, which makes it easy to scoop way easier. And I use this, and you should too.

• 28:37Mark Normand?

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• 29:01Sam Morril?

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• 30:08Sam Morril?

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• 30:41Mark Normand?

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• 31:23Mark Normand?

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• 31:54Sam Morril?

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• 32:39Sam Morril?

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• 33:02Speaker 01

  He was called Jeff.

• 33:04Mark Normand?

  Oh, man. They were really pounding away.

• 33:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, they really were. And, yeah.

• 33:08Sam Morril?

  You signed up for one day to be an extra. This is.

• 33:10Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 33:11Mark Normand?

  Oh, man. Oh, you got some tits.

• 33:14Speaker 01

  That's Jeff.

• 33:15Mark Normand?

  That's Jeff.

• 33:16Speaker 01

  That's Jeff.

• 33:17Mark Normand?

  That's the guy who got the photo.

• 33:18Speaker 01

  That's the guy who wanted the photo because his son was a fan. See, look, I'm not enjoying it. I'm just, um, I'm a psychopath.

• 33:23Mark Normand?

  I think he's banging a lady, though, right?

• 33:24Speaker 01

  So, yeah, he's banging a lady, but then, and then what's about, well, it, see, look, and then I look, I check him out, and I'm like, yep.

• 33:31Mark Normand?

  Oh, man.

• 33:32Speaker 01

  That'll do.

• 33:33Mark Normand?

  People listening on audio are really messing up.

• 33:34Sam Morril?

  This is wild, yeah. You should be watching this one on YouTube.

• 33:37Mark Normand?

  Now, were you nervous? You're reading the script, you go, all right, I'm gonna go out for this role, I got it, here we go.

• 33:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, I mean, I feel like I've just become a bit, I've done a lot of sex on camera.

• 33:47Mark Normand?

  Oh, is that right?

• 33:48Speaker 01

  Us two, we just don't act. So, yeah, I guess I've been just sort of desensitized to it.

• 33:56Mark Normand?

  Sure. And then in the background, there's craft services, there's grips and lighting people, so.

• 34:02Speaker 01

  There were grips on set, too. They gave me a little, um, the posing, the cocksuck, which they left in my trailer. And I, and I picked it up, and it had a little label on the inside with an S on it. I was like, surely you take that, or just put an L to make me feel better.

• 34:19Mark Normand?

  Yeah, come on.

• 34:20Sam Morril?

  That's hilarious.

• 34:21Speaker 01

  It's really sad.

• 34:22Mark Normand?

  Wow, that is hilarious. I'd be like, give me a Christmas stocking.

• 34:24Sam Morril?

  Well, just behind you, like, Jeff, what size did you get?

• 34:28Speaker 01

  Jeff's XL. Just find that in my asscrack at the end of the day.

• 34:37Mark Normand?

  Now you had the show with your dad.

• 34:39Speaker 01

  I don't.

• 34:40Mark Normand?

  Oh, sorry, sorry.

• 34:41Speaker 01

  That's the only thing I haven't done, any sex scenes.

• 34:45Speaker 01

  We didn't do that. Oh my god, imagine his cock sock.

• 34:48Mark Normand?

  Oh, man.

• 34:49Speaker 01

  Like a rugby sock, long and thin.

• 34:51Mark Normand?

  My dad was huge, by the way.

• 34:52Sam Morril?

  Was he?

• 34:53Mark Normand?

  He would sleep naked, huge hog.

• 34:56Sam Morril?

  Oh, yeah, he bucked the shirt and no undies.

• 34:57Mark Normand?

  Exactly. He would roll over and it would like, it was like a delay, like it flopped. Is that from a kid's perspective? Maybe, maybe, but I have photos.

• 35:05Speaker 01

  No.

• 35:06Mark Normand?

  No, no, but, uh...

• 35:07Sam Morril?

  That's the way to do it as a dad. You just show your kid your dick when he's like really young and that way it becomes a legend.

• 35:12Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah. Charlie, get in here.

• 35:16Sam Morril?

  Yeah, Charlie, stay awhile.

• 35:18Mark Normand?

  I got a one-year-old, his wallpaper is just me naked, just so he can really soak it in. No, but, um...

• 35:24Speaker 01

  My dad has, like, constantly makes jokes about how I didn't inherit his, you know, his blessed appendage.

• 35:32Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 35:33Speaker 01

  That's his bit that he'll do anywhere and everywhere on our show. Every time we go and, you know, go on a podcast or a chat show, it's his like root one, first point of call, make a joke about how he's insanely hung and that I didn't inherit it.

• 35:47Mark Normand?

  Ah, hilarious. That's a cool dad. Or maybe traumatizing, I don't know.

• 35:51Speaker 01

  Maybe traumatizing.

• 35:52Sam Morril?

  I like how your dad's dressed.

• 35:53Mark Normand?

  Oh, he's British, baby.

• 35:55Speaker 01

  He dresses like that all the time. Yeah, yeah.

• 35:56Mark Normand?

  Now...

• 35:56Speaker 01

  Wears a suit.

• 35:57Mark Normand?

  Cause this show is very popular. I think they did a couple of seasons, right?

• 36:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, we did, yeah, yeah.

• 36:01Mark Normand?

  So, how do you pitch this? You go, you think, alright, I'm a comic, but my dad is fucking hilarious for an old guy who's not a comic.

• 36:09Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:10Mark Normand?

  And you go pitch this to, what, Netflix or whatever?

• 36:13Speaker 01

  Well, no, the weirdly, the way that working with my dad started is, it was always completely sort of accidental. Because I used to talk about him on stage and he was like a big character in my stand-up. And eventually I got to the point where I was just like, I can't keep doing jokes about funny shit my dad said. So I'll try and write a show about something else. But then he was up at the festival and then someone suggested that we do like a little like chat show up there at the Edinburgh Festival. Where I interview other guests at the festival. And he would just sit on stage as like, almost like a flesh prop. He would just be there. And it would be funny that I got my dad up there with me and he would chip in every now and again. Anyway, he was up on stage, obviously then like completely took over.

• 36:52Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 36:53Speaker 01

  Undermined me.

• 36:54Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 36:54Speaker 01

  Threw me out of the bars, was asking his own inappropriate questions. And then someone was in the audience from the BBC and they said, oh, we'd love to do this on TV. And he was like, no, no, I'm not a performer, not an actor. I've never done anything. But then he was in his like late seventies.

• 37:08Sam Morril?

  Wow.

• 37:10Speaker 01

  But I guess he saw the cheque that they offered him and was like, yeah, might as well. Then we did like, yeah, we did three seasons of a show on the BBC. And then from that Netflix were like, we have an idea for you to do a travel. So they pitched it to us. They were like, we would love you to do a travel series where you take him around the world.

• 37:27Sam Morril?

  It's amazing. He did one gig, like every comic stream. He does one gig and he's like, oh, yeah, yeah, I'll do a show.

• 37:33Speaker 01

  Breakthrough in his late seventies.

• 37:35Sam Morril?

  That's like what you see in a movie. You're like, that's not how it fucking happens. And then that's actually, wow, that's amazing.

• 37:40Mark Normand?

  But that's, you get to spend all that time, like, yeah, his dad's dead, my dad's fucking ice cold, like, I could never.

• 37:45Sam Morril?

  My dad raised me as a lot.

• 37:47Mark Normand?

  Yeah, stepdad or whatever, but my dad, my dad could never do that. If I was on that show, he'd just be like.

• 37:55Sam Morril?

  But that might be funny.

• 37:56Mark Normand?

  That might be funny. That might be funny. That'd be, it'd be going, hey dad, so how was your childhood? Huh? Shut up. I'm listening to music. Like, I couldn't, I get nothing out of him. But your dad was like a natural.

• 38:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, he was really good and really funny. Well, yeah, but then the problem is you sort of, you know, you create a monster. Because it was like opening Pandora's box. And then when I put him on TV, I realized he was the funny one and I was the straight man.

• 38:19Mark Normand?

  Oh, hilarious.

• 38:20Sam Morril?

  You're probably guiding that. I mean, you have to kind of guide it that way.

• 38:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, a little bit. And I can work out like a scene and, you know, obviously it's an, an element of it is constructed to put him into a funny situation. And then, you know, orchestrate a world in which he's going to say something inappropriate. But he always gets the punchline. So we did all, you know, five seasons of the show. And I'm doing all the work sort of behind the scenes, but he's getting all of the credit. And then every time I walk down the street now, people are like, oh yeah, how's your dad? He's, he's so much funnier than you. And I'm like, okay, great. Yeah, thanks very much.

• 38:54Mark Normand?

  Man, did you get annoyed? Cause like, you know. Family gets old after a while. I'm at my house three days in New Orleans and I'm like, I gotta get the fuck out of here. Was it ever like?

• 39:04Sam Morril?

  I had a rat in my apartment last year and my parents were like, stay with us. And I was like, I'm gonna chance it with the rat.

• 39:09Mark Normand?

  Yeah, exactly, exactly.

• 39:11Sam Morril?

  Give it a shot.

• 39:11Mark Normand?

  So on set with your dad for five seasons has gotta be a little grating.

• 39:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, it was, it was, it was quite, it, they got shorter and shorter. Like the first time we went away, we were filming for like two months and by the end it was like three weeks.

• 39:24Mark Normand?

  Oh.

• 39:24Speaker 01

  It was quite a long time to sort of be together, like living in, you know, in the same hotels, having breakfast, lunch and dinner together every day.

• 39:31Mark Normand?

  Sure.

• 39:32Speaker 01

  But I would say the one advantage of like filming something with, um, you know, a sort of snob in his eighties is that you get to do like a filming schedule, but like through his lens. So you can have all of these demands.

• 39:47Mark Normand?

  That's great.

• 39:48Speaker 01

  We're having to work with an eight year old.

• 39:50Mark Normand?

  That's great.

• 39:51Speaker 01

  That doesn't wanna be here. So like you'd have to, wherever we were in the world, even if we were in like the middle of like, I don't know, a fucking minefield in Cambodia, we'd have to stop at one o'clock to go for a lunch and it would have to be a cooked lunch and they'd have to be like proper wine. And he'd have to have an hour at lunch to have like a nice decent civilized luncheon. And then he'd come back at two, he'd work for two or three more hours. That would be the end of the day. And it was just like, it ran like clockwork because we had to be like, oh yeah, he's very old and.

• 40:19Mark Normand?

  That's amazing. It's like dating a woman in a wheelchair. Best table, you know, you get to board the flight first. It's incredible. Wow. Good, good little life hack there.

• 40:29Speaker 01

  I just bring an elderly man with me now everywhere, just to make sure that I get treated right.

• 40:34Sam Morril?

  How did, how did your mom deal with this? What did she think of it?

• 40:36Speaker 01

  Well, she, she used to sort of tag along. She was like there in the, in the background to sort of manage him. Because he needed quite a lot of man marking in a lot of those situations.

• 40:46Mark Normand?

  Did he ever go, thanks, son, for getting me this famous?

• 40:49Speaker 01

  No. No, he complained the whole time. He's, I don't wanna be doing this. And then he, he got a, you know, a degree of notoriety. Then he got my mom involved in it as well. So then she ended up being on camera. And then as soon as they could, they ditched me. And now they have their own podcast. They, they, they just, this year went on tour. For the first time ever.

• 41:08Mark Normand?

  Hilarious.

• 41:08Speaker 01

  You know, aged eighty-five, he's doing his first ever tour. I'm not even involved anymore because they have their own podcast and they have their own fanbase.

• 41:15Sam Morril?

  You're talking to your PR people. Can they get me on that? He's like, yeah. He's like, man, I'm good.

• 41:20Speaker 01

  Yeah. So, yeah, they, they've cut me loose.

• 41:23Sam Morril?

  I'm the funny one.

• 41:24Speaker 01

  They fucking used me.

• 41:26Mark Normand?

  Damn, that's hilarious.

• 41:27Speaker 01

  Just be careful, you know?

• 41:28Sam Morril?

  Him and Jeff, your dad and Jeff in the fucking orgy, same thing.

• 41:32Mark Normand?

  The power corrupts. Uh, alright, well we got some peeves from Whitehall over here.

• 41:36Sam Morril?

  I love, love when people come with peeves.

• 41:39Mark Normand?

  That's a big part of our show.

• 41:40Speaker 01

  Oh, I don't want to do these.

• 41:41Sam Morril?

  Okay, peeves, people who don't queue properly.

• 41:44Mark Normand?

  That's like a translation, get in line.

• 41:46Speaker 01

  Get in line, yeah, standing in line, people that don't, aren't able to line up properly.

• 41:52Sam Morril?

  It's, it's unacceptable.

• 41:53Speaker 01

  It's, yeah.

• 41:54Sam Morril?

  The diagonal cut in, it's like, come on.

• 41:56Mark Normand?

  That's a big one.

• 41:57Speaker 01

  That I really don't like, and people, like, when, when, when I can feel, uh, like, an incorrectly formulated queue occurring, I get very on edge.

• 42:07Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 42:07Speaker 01

  When you feel people just joining from the side and it's just, there's no, and no one's doing anything to stop it.

• 42:12Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 42:13Speaker 01

  Uh, that, that, that gives me anxiety.

• 42:15Speaker 03

  Have you been to China?

• 42:17Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 42:18Speaker 03

  It's exactly like that, it's just a big ball of people and one little entrance and it just funnels in whenever it can.

• 42:24Mark Normand?

  Well, they'll literally hit them with like a broom, have you seen on the subway, they'll just put them with a stick, like wedge them in there, crazy.

• 42:30Speaker 01

  We have, um, obviously in, uh, in Britain, it's sort of, I think it's something like a point of pride that we're quite good at queuing.

• 42:36Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 42:36Speaker 01

  And, and we, we, I think, would say that that's a sort of national sport.

• 42:41Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 42:41Speaker 01

  But like David Beckham, I genuinely think got his knighthood, which he'd wanted to get for years because he stood in a line when the Queen died. And there was that, the, the, the long line of people to pay their respects.

• 42:53Mark Normand?

  Ah.

• 42:53Speaker 01

  He got so much queed us for the fact that even as a high-profile celebrity, he stood in line with everyone else. And there was other celebrities that like were busted, queue barging.

• 43:04Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 43:04Speaker 01

  And they were like cancelled, there was, there were these two television presenters that went straight to the front of the line, cancelled, taken off air, lost their show. David Beckham just stood there with everyone else.

• 43:13Sam Morril?

  Which is what you're supposed to do.

• 43:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 43:15Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 43:15Speaker 01

  Someone took a picture of it, he got a knighthood, not for all of the charity work or, you know, winning, uh, football tournaments.

• 43:22Sam Morril?

  How about, how about that stuff with his kid, that's pretty wild, right?

• 43:25Mark Normand?

  Are you allowed to talk about that, as a countryman?

• 43:28Speaker 01

  No.

• 43:28Mark Normand?

  Okay.

• 43:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, I don't know.

• 43:29Mark Normand?

  So what happened, his wife danced with their kid too sexily?

• 43:32Sam Morril?

  I don't know.

• 43:33Mark Normand?

  At a wedding?

• 43:34Speaker 01

  Well, I, I saw that and I'm like, I think of all the embarrassing shit my mum and dad have done to me, often on camera, on that Netflix show. And I'm like, dancing during a wedding, I mean.

• 43:45Mark Normand?

  Yeah, and look, you could do worse than Victoria Beckham with a, with a sexy dance.

• 43:51Sam Morril?

  Yeah, but if it's your mom, it's still your mom, dude.

• 43:53Mark Normand?

  Ah, I'm from the south.

• 43:56Mark Normand?

  Well, is it? This can't be it. That's nothing.

• 43:59Speaker 01

  No, that's, that's, I think, just another dance.

• 44:02Mark Normand?

  There's no video of it. Oh.

• 44:04Speaker 01

  When I did my, uh...

• 44:05Sam Morril?

  Oh, boy.

• 44:06Speaker 01

  No, that's AI.

• 44:08Sam Morril?

  Doing too much.

• 44:09Speaker 01

  AI.

• 44:10Sam Morril?

  No, is it AI?

• 44:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 44:12Sam Morril?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

• 44:13Mark Normand?

  All right, come on.

• 44:15Sam Morril?

  All right.

• 44:16Mark Normand?

  I don't get why this is, this was like a big deal for a hot minute.

• 44:18Speaker 01

  When I did my show in, uh, the Vegas, where I took my mom and dad to Vegas for travels with my father, I tricked my dad into going to, uh, Magic Mike, and I told him it was a magician. And he was sat there in the front row, and then my mom was there, and she ended up getting up on stage and was being, you know, lifted up.

• 44:35Mark Normand?

  Oh, no.

• 44:36Speaker 01

  Tossed around the stage by some topless dancer.

• 44:38Mark Normand?

  No, thank you.

• 44:39Sam Morril?

  That happened to me. I did a gig with an ex of mine, and she went up there, and we were kind of having problems. We were, like, at the point where it was, at the point of no return already, and then I was just watching a guy, like, hump her on stage. I was like, this isn't helping.

• 44:52Speaker 01

  No.

• 44:53Mark Normand?

  No, thank you.

• 44:54Sam Morril?

  This isn't great.

• 44:56Mark Normand?

  And the mom, though, that's even weirder, because you're like, this is a nice, sweet lady here. Don't defile her. She's wearing big red glasses and...

• 45:03Sam Morril?

  That's what they do. They defile.

• 45:04Mark Normand?

  They defile.

• 45:05Sam Morril?

  They're defilers.

• 45:06Speaker 01

  Don't ruin this experience for me.

• 45:08Mark Normand?

  Didn't help that she came.

• 45:09Speaker 01

  I mean, I don't know, uh, these are...

• 45:11Sam Morril?

  Parents who screen shame.

• 45:14Mark Normand?

  What?

• 45:15Sam Morril?

  So that's like you're looking at your phone too much.

• 45:17Speaker 01

  Yeah. Or like showing your screens are amazing.

• 45:22Speaker 01

  That's so good.

• 45:23Sam Morril?

  Yeah, thanks for watching us, guys.

• 45:25Speaker 01

  No, we're just like, I, I mean, the amount of sort of social situations recently that I've been saved by the presence of an iPad or a phone that I can just... Bit of Peppa Pig and just get my toddler to just stop causing chaos and, like, embarrassing me publicly.

• 45:42Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 45:42Speaker 01

  The idea of not being able to do that would just horrify me. I don't know how parents did it before.

• 45:47Mark Normand?

  But you can't go 24/7 screen.

• 45:49Speaker 01

  No, just a bit of screen.

• 45:50Mark Normand?

  A bit of screen.

• 45:52Speaker 01

  But, yeah. Does that get over there?

• 45:54Mark Normand?

  I get that. Yeah, like, I, I do movies with my kid.

• 45:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 45:58Mark Normand?

  I don't, I don't get them an iPhone, but I'll do a movie with them.

• 46:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 46:00Mark Normand?

  And I feel like that's a little better.

• 46:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 46:02Mark Normand?

  Because it's a, a lot of amount of time, there's an ending to it.

• 46:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 46:05Mark Normand?

  But sometimes I feel like, here you go, kiddo, play with this, it's, you'll never get it back.

• 46:10Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 46:10Sam Morril?

  Yeah. Gives him his iPad. You're gonna watch The Mule with Clint Eastwood today.

• 46:15Mark Normand?

  Is that Jeff?

• 46:15Sam Morril?

  The strange choice.

• 46:18Speaker 01

  Also, maybe with some of the stuff that you Google, that's quite dangerous.

• 46:22Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah, good point.

• 46:23Speaker 01

  Who's this Shawn Michaels, David?

• 46:26Mark Normand?

  Shit, it's not the wrestling clip.

• 46:29Speaker 01

  Oh, no. It's a different time.

• 46:32Sam Morril?

  People who get too keen on running?

• 46:35Speaker 01

  Well, that's a January thing, I guess.

• 46:37Mark Normand?

  Oh.

• 46:37Speaker 01

  Right now.

• 46:38Sam Morril?

  Oh, like, I'm gonna turn my life around. It's January.

• 46:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, I just think running is interesting.

• 46:42Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 46:43Speaker 01

  I like, I like running. I run. I like, I go, I run a lot. But anyone that wants to talk to me about how far I've run, or where I've run, or how fast I've run.

• 46:52Sam Morril?

  It's not good conversation.

• 46:53Speaker 01

  Oh, it's terrible.

• 46:54Sam Morril?

  If you're gonna do it, do it. But no one wants to hear your fucking jog stories, you know?

• 46:57Mark Normand?

  Yeah, and I don't wanna sign up for your marathon either. All this sponsor me. You're like, eh, you go run.

• 47:03Speaker 01

  Or a half marathon.

• 47:04Mark Normand?

  Ah, come on.

• 47:06Speaker 01

  They want a whole sponsorship for half a run.

• 47:08Sam Morril?

  And also, by the way, not 12 miles, whatever, 13 miles, whatever you're doing, not easy, but also, like, I don't give a shit.

• 47:14Mark Normand?

  I don't give a shit either. It's one foot in front of the other. It's already free.

• 47:17Sam Morril?

  Just exercise and extra, just do it. You don't need to, unless it's your job, like, if you're like, one of those fitness influencers, yeah, do that. But if you're not that, I don't give a fuck.

• 47:25Mark Normand?

  No, no, no.

• 47:27Speaker 01

  Even like ultra marathons and endurance events and things like that, I'm like, yeah, just go and do that.

• 47:33Mark Normand?

  Go do it.

• 47:34Speaker 01

  But don't tell me about it.

• 47:35Mark Normand?

  Yeah. If I last eight minutes in bed, I'm not bragging about it. You just do it.

• 47:39Sam Morril?

  Yeah, cuz it never happens.

• 47:40Speaker 01

  So. No.

• 47:42Sam Morril?

  No, but that is the thing that you realize, like, that is so much work. If we did it, it probably would become our personality.

• 47:48Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 47:48Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 47:49Sam Morril?

  I mean, a fucking Ironman, like, what is that? That's crazy, right? A Tough Mudder, what do they call them?

• 47:54Mark Normand?

  Yeah, Tough Mudders. That's, that's extra shit.

• 47:56Sam Morril?

  You wouldn't wanna tell people. That's what Norman Bates had.

• 48:01Mark Normand?

  Uh, this is a lot different than the Rachel Ray show, I assume. Just from the videos we've seen alone.

• 48:07Speaker 03

  So, uh, Ironman is 2.4 mile swim.

• 48:10Sam Morril?

  Wow.

• 48:10Speaker 03

  112 miles on a bike.

• 48:12Mark Normand?

  God damn.

• 48:12Speaker 03

  And then a marathon, a 26.2 mile run.

• 48:15Sam Morril?

  That's insane.

• 48:16Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 48:17Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 48:17Speaker 01

  I did an ultra marathon once, by accident. I.

• 48:20Mark Normand?

  What?

• 48:21Speaker 01

  My friend was doing this, like.

• 48:22Sam Morril?

  By accident?

• 48:23Speaker 01

  Well, yeah, no, well, the ultra marathon element was by accident, cuz my friend was doing this insane challenge. Where he was like setting off from London and then they were doing three marathons back to back and then rowing across the channel and cycling to the Alps. And they were like, can you do some of it? And I was like, absolutely not. And they were like, please, you just just come for one like leg of the journey. I was like, what would be the easiest bit? And they said the third marathon, because everyone will be exhausted because they would have just run two marathons and you don't have to run it, you can walk it. So I was like, fine, I'll do that.

• 48:51Mark Normand?

  Oh, you're sneaking in.

• 48:52Speaker 01

  So I just sneak in.

• 48:53Mark Normand?

  Oh.

• 48:54Speaker 01

  But then I start the marathon and then about halfway through they were like, oh yeah, by the way, we got rerouted yesterday. So we had to take off a couple of miles. So we're having to add them to this marathon. So then they added an extra like three miles to this marathon that I accidentally said that I would do.

• 49:07Mark Normand?

  What?

• 49:08Sam Morril?

  So you did twenty nine.

• 49:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, I had to do like twenty nine miles.

• 49:11Mark Normand?

  What'd that take?

• 49:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, man, I mean, my time was like six hours or something.

• 49:15Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah.

• 49:16Speaker 01

  I was walking a lot of it. But again, and also I felt too awkward to go and ask anyone for any sponsorship or talk about it. So.

• 49:24Sam Morril?

  Twenty nine miles.

• 49:24Mark Normand?

  That's insane.

• 49:26Speaker 01

  It sucks.

• 49:26Mark Normand?

  Do you have an iPod going? I mean, our iPod, what year is it? Do you have a AirPod?

• 49:32Speaker 01

  AirPod, yeah.

• 49:32Mark Normand?

  Yeah, like a podcast, give you a couple of, um.

• 49:36Sam Morril?

  People must have listened to this pod while running a marathon.

• 49:38Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 49:39Speaker 01

  He's probably gotten through that final couple of hours.

• 49:42Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 49:42Speaker 01

  You know?

• 49:42Mark Normand?

  There you go, Shawn Michaels. I just realized they should do that to get in the country. That should be the new immigrant, like, um.

• 49:51Speaker 01

  Citizenship.

• 49:52Mark Normand?

  Citizenship, like you do the swim through the channel, you know, run twelve miles, get on a bike. If you get into America after all that, we'll take you.

• 50:00Speaker 01

  We'll take you.

• 50:01Mark Normand?

  Because it shows that you're fit, you're young enough, you're stamina.

• 50:04Sam Morril?

  What if they already swim here from Cuba, though?

• 50:06Mark Normand?

  I'll count it. I'll count it, yeah. That counts. That's perfect. I think we got some here. That should be the, uh, admission process.

• 50:14Speaker 01

  We got something. When you said that, usually I thought you were referencing the Shawn Michaels thing and I was like, yeah.

• 50:20Sam Morril?

  You have to suck a good dick if you want to be in this country.

• 50:22Speaker 01

  Suck a good air dick.

• 50:23Mark Normand?

  That's not bad either. That'll be the women and the men will be the, uh, the Iron Man.

• 50:27Speaker 01

  I don't think I'll try that immigration the next time.

• 50:30Mark Normand?

  It'll be an amazing country to live in.

• 50:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 50:32Sam Morril?

  You gotta leave the country. Why not? You didn't air tickle the balls.

• 50:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 50:36Mark Normand?

  Ah, that's good stuff.

• 50:40Speaker 01

  Good stuff.

• 50:41Sam Morril?

  What else we got for any more peeves?

• 50:43Speaker 01

  I had no more peeves.

• 50:43Mark Normand?

  Well, you had a toast. You had a toast or something. There was a, wait, go back to, Jesus Christ. Go back to Gmail.

• 50:50Sam Morril?

  What's happening here?

• 50:51Mark Normand?

  Rex. That's what I meant.

• 50:52Speaker 01

  Look, with now and I, movie.

• 50:55Mark Normand?

  Whoa. Wow.

• 50:59Speaker 01

  Holy shit.

• 51:00Sam Morril?

  That's crazy.

• 51:01Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 51:01Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 51:02Sam Morril?

  I was literally going between that and a couple of other movies last night. I was like, I got two people saying this is good this week. Let me give it a shot.

• 51:07Mark Normand?

  I'm gonna watch this movie.

• 51:08Sam Morril?

  I liked it. Yeah.

• 51:10Mark Normand?

  Wait a minute. British food influencers?

• 51:12Speaker 01

  Oh, yes.

• 51:12Mark Normand?

  You can't convince me that British food is good.

• 51:13Speaker 01

  No, this is great. Well, no, it's not. And this is what I've become obsessed with. You know the way, like, you watch one thing and then suddenly the algorithm is all it says?

• 51:20Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 51:21Speaker 01

  And there was one guy who was like a British food influencer.

• 51:26Speaker 01

  He's called Eating with Tubbs. And he went viral because he had this gravy that honestly looked like cement. And he was pouring it over his roast dinner. And, I mean, it... Absolutely gross.

• 51:40Mark Normand?

  Pull up the gravy.

• 51:41Speaker 01

  But now all I get is like these sort of anti-food influen... not anti-food influencers. They are food influencers, but they're just British food influencers, so it's British. Oh, there's Tubbs.

• 51:50Mark Normand?

  There's Tubbs.

• 51:51Speaker 01

  Ah! Look at that gravy!

• 51:53Mark Normand?

  That's like Two Girls One Plate. Holy hell.

• 51:57Speaker 01

  It's insane.

• 51:58Mark Normand?

  That looks like chocolate.

• 51:59Speaker 01

  It looks like chocolate.

• 52:00Sam Morril?

  Was this dude in that bathhouse with you?

• 52:03Speaker 01

  Jeff?

• 52:04Sam Morril?

  Holy shit. Oh, my God. That is nasty, dude.

• 52:07Mark Normand?

  Wow, that looks great. I love gravy.

• 52:09Sam Morril?

  He's too thick, dude.

• 52:10Mark Normand?

  I'm on it. Thicker the better.

• 52:11Speaker 01

  You would like that gravy?

• 52:13Mark Normand?

  I would love it. Put that right in my ass.

• 52:16Speaker 01

  But there's... Oh, yeah, that's, um...

• 52:17Mark Normand?

  This guy drives me mad.

• 52:18Speaker 01

  That's Bevo. He's the one that eats it with, uh... In what... What does he do?

• 52:26Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, he eats food without chewing it.

• 52:29Mark Normand?

  Oh, I don't care for that.

• 52:31Speaker 01

  No.

• 52:32Mark Normand?

  Yuck. You guys got crazy veneers.

• 52:37Mark Normand?

  What the fuck?

• 52:38Speaker 01

  Who else do we have? We have Eating with Todd, who's massive in the UK. He's...

• 52:43Mark Normand?

  Okay.

• 52:44Speaker 01

  He... Oh.

• 52:47Speaker 01

  He's just a glutton, a glutton. He's like the biggest food influence in the UK. Like, he goes to a restaurant and then it's just, you can't book a table for love nor money.

• 52:54Mark Normand?

  Really?

• 52:55Speaker 01

  You just, it's a glutton.

• 52:57Sam Morril?

  That must go to your head, too.

• 52:58Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 52:59Speaker 01

  He's got some power now.

• 53:00Sam Morril?

  Do these guys have any background in food, or they're just people who like food?

• 53:03Speaker 01

  I think they're just people that like eating food. Um, I don't, yeah.

• 53:09Sam Morril?

  Oh, I've seen this guy.

• 53:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, this guy's massive.

• 53:12Mark Normand?

  Wow, he looks like he's doing the legwork. He's going to these crazy places, he's traveling. Look at this guy. He's out on the, he's boots on the ground.

• 53:20Sam Morril?

  You're meeting the cow you're gonna eat? That's kind of a bummer.

• 53:25Mark Normand?

  Ah, works at a brothel.

• 53:26Sam Morril?

  I need to, I need to break bread with the fucking lobster I'm about to eat.

• 53:31Speaker 01

  I don't wanna see, I don't wanna see that.

• 53:33Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 53:34Sam Morril?

  Remember Richard Jenny's joke about that?

• 53:36Mark Normand?

  Yes.

• 53:36Sam Morril?

  The lobster tank? He goes, they all have that look on their face like, any word from the governor?

• 53:42Mark Normand?

  Great joke.

• 53:43Speaker 01

  Um, what's the guy, my, my takeaway, I think he's called, he sets up a table outside kebab shops in England.

• 53:50Mark Normand?

  Oh, fun.

• 53:51Speaker 01

  Rate my takeaway, rate my takeaway.

• 53:52Mark Normand?

  Rate my takeaway.

• 53:53Sam Morril?

  He's like the OG.

• 53:54Speaker 01

  In London is the kebabs. Yeah, but this guy, he does it in the north of England and he sets up a table outside like a fish and chippy. And then he, yeah. He's amazing. So I'm about to do this award show when I go back, like our version of the Grammys. And one of my ideas, cause it's gone up north for the first time ever, is just to get this guy and stick him in the room like next to, you know, Bruno Mars.

• 54:17Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah.

• 54:19Speaker 01

  Just have him on a table.

• 54:19Mark Normand?

  That's great.

• 54:20Speaker 01

  Like, he just sets up his, uh,

• 54:23Sam Morril?

  And he's huge, people would know him, he's huge over there?

• 54:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's, he's.

• 54:28Mark Normand?

  It's only kebab? Or does he do everything?

• 54:31Speaker 01

  He'll do a kebab or a fish and, fish and chip shop or a pie.

• 54:34Mark Normand?

  Love it.

• 54:35Speaker 01

  And he'll just set up his table.

• 54:37Mark Normand?

  Wow.

• 54:37Speaker 01

  And set up outside.

• 54:38Mark Normand?

  I love this.

• 54:39Speaker 01

  And he'll rate your takeaway. Look at this.

• 54:41Mark Normand?

  This is great. Suck it, Portnoy.

• 54:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 54:47Mark Normand?

  That's a lot of chips.

• 54:50Speaker 01

  But this is my algorithm is just all this.

• 54:52Sam Morril?

  Me too.

• 54:53Speaker 01

  It's this guy eating kebabs outside.

• 54:55Sam Morril?

  I get a lot of this stuff.

• 54:56Speaker 01

  Table or the man with the really thick gravy.

• 54:59Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 54:59Sam Morril?

  A lot of people, a lot of burgers that have an egg on them and they're like, they're slicing and the yolk just goes over. You're like, alright. A lot of dudes eating sandwiches in the car. I get a lot of that.

• 55:08Mark Normand?

  I see that's the American influencer with the food. We're too lazy. These guys are going out there. They're doing the work. We're got, our guys sit in the car or just like.

• 55:16Sam Morril?

  The guy who eats at lunch. Have you seen that guy?

• 55:18Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 55:18Sam Morril?

  He's like, this is my lunch today. And it's just a guy, he just eats food.

• 55:21Speaker 01

  Just in the car?

• 55:22Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 55:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 55:22Sam Morril?

  We have a lot of those.

• 55:23Speaker 01

  There's a lot of those now.

• 55:25Mark Normand?

  I don't like the car.

• 55:26Speaker 01

  They, they pay those people, right?

• 55:27Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah.

• 55:27Speaker 01

  They're launching a new product now.

• 55:28Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah.

• 55:29Sam Morril?

  Every once in a while, you can tell they're like, man, fuck, KFC is really good. And you're like, oh, this is an ad, I think. They're shitting on everything else. You're like, no, but this fuck, this is good. This is real chicken, dude.

• 55:41Speaker 01

  But in a way, though, like, those food influencers that I watch, I think are quite, I mean, it's like online as M-Pic. Cause they just make me not want to eat food.

• 55:49Mark Normand?

  Oh, good point. Yeah.

• 55:51Speaker 01

  I see that gravy and I'm like, I think I'm good.

• 55:54Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 55:54Speaker 01

  To ever.

• 55:55Sam Morril?

  But when it's like good restaurants do, same with the pizza. I see those Portnoy things pop up and I'm like, I want pizza.

• 56:01Mark Normand?

  I know. They look damn good.

• 56:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's what, that's why I'm saying, just watch the British food influencers.

• 56:07Sam Morril?

  But isn't food in London kind of taking a big step up?

• 56:10Speaker 01

  I think so.

• 56:11Mark Normand?

  Well, the Indians helped it, I think.

• 56:12Speaker 01

  Yes, yeah.

• 56:13Mark Normand?

  With the curries.

• 56:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think that's the advantage of being colonizers is that we just went around the world and.

• 56:20Sam Morril?

  That's the move, dude.

• 56:23Sam Morril?

  Well, those Vietnamese sandwiches are so good. The French, that bread?

• 56:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:27Mark Normand?

  The bread, yeah. That's true.

• 56:28Speaker 01

  What's a spice bag? A spice bag is.

• 56:31Mark Normand?

  That's what a Shawn Michaels would check like.

• 56:37Speaker 01

  A spice bag, I think, is like chips with car. I think it's everything in there. Yeah, the other one is a much.

• 56:43Mark Normand?

  Is there meat in there too?

• 56:44Speaker 01

  I got Google. There's meat in there, yeah. I got Google. Yeah, I think that's your job.

• 56:48Mark Normand?

  Exactly.

• 56:49Speaker 01

  No, I've seen these though. The spice bag, yeah, that's become, it's french fries with uh Oh yeah. Chinese

• 56:56Mark Normand?

  Oh, that looks amazing.

• 56:57Speaker 01

  Spice on it. They're pretty good. The munchy box as well is pretty incredible.

• 57:00Mark Normand?

  Whoa.

• 57:01Speaker 01

  That's a Scottish one, uh, very popular in Glasgow where it's just like everything in a pizza box. So you go to a kebab shop and then they just shove in like all of it. What do they call this one in Rochester, Matt?

• 57:11Mark Normand?

  Carbage plate.

• 57:12Speaker 01

  Yes. Plate.

• 57:13Mark Normand?

  That looks fucking incredible. Imagine you were drunk and high. Oh my god. That's like

• 57:19Speaker 01

  Curly fries are so underrated.

• 57:21Mark Normand?

  Oh, the best.

• 57:22Speaker 01

  Curly fries are so good.

• 57:22Mark Normand?

  Especially with the seasoning on there.

• 57:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 57:24Mark Normand?

  Look at that. You got coleslaw wings, pizza fries, looks like uh some halal meat on the left.

• 57:30Speaker 01

  Yeah. That's a Super Bowl.

• 57:31Mark Normand?

  Oh, yeah.

• 57:32Speaker 01

  Yes. For a party, oh fuck.

• 57:34Mark Normand?

  But I mean, you're gonna have a miscarriage. I mean, this is over.

• 57:36Speaker 01

  I made a snack adium once.

• 57:38Mark Normand?

  Uh, come again?

• 57:39Speaker 01

  A snack adium.

• 57:40Mark Normand?

  Snack adium.

• 57:41Speaker 01

  I was told that that was an American thing. Snack adium?

• 57:43Mark Normand?

  I don't know that.

• 57:43Speaker 01

  Can you type in Jack Whitehall snack adium? I think I posted it online. I was told that this was an American tradition that you do for the Super Bowl.

• 57:49Mark Normand?

  What?

• 57:50Speaker 01

  Where I made a stadium out of fast food. Oh, all I know is just wings and pizza. Images, images.

• 57:56Mark Normand?

  Oh, images, yeah.

• 57:56Speaker 01

  I think it'll be on images. Yeah, there. I made that.

• 57:59Mark Normand?

  This year? Who knows?

• 58:00Speaker 01

  Uh, a couple of years ago.

• 58:01Mark Normand?

  That is

• 58:02Speaker 01

  Holy shit!

• 58:02Mark Normand?

  You made that?

• 58:03Speaker 01

  Yes!

• 58:04Mark Normand?

  That's incredible.

• 58:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's like got the sliders and

• 58:07Mark Normand?

  What?

• 58:07Speaker 01

  Deep fried tater tots and that's an avocado, uh You threw a real party here. Yeah, I threw, well, no, it was just me.

• 58:16Speaker 01

  It's just me at home at like four o'clock in the morning.

• 58:18Mark Normand?

  Oh, Tubbs gonna ruin that thing.

• 58:20Speaker 01

  Eating my way through that, yeah. Oh, yeah, that is Tubbs-esque.

• 58:23Mark Normand?

  Well, so is that lettuce in the middle for the field, the green?

• 58:25Speaker 01

  No, that's avocado.

• 58:26Mark Normand?

  Wow, this must've cost ten thousand dollars.

• 58:28Speaker 01

  It looks like it, right?

• 58:30Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 58:30Speaker 01

  It's pretty impressive. And then those were like the pepperami sticks that I fastened into the, to the posts. Little prosciutto. Yeah, yeah.

• 58:37Mark Normand?

  This is why the terrorists are angry. Cause we're doing this shit over here.

• 58:40Speaker 01

  That's America.

• 58:42Mark Normand?

  Hell, yeah. Look at that. I mean, I could feed a family of, of a hundred people.

• 58:48Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 58:48Mark Normand?

  And we're just taking photos of it. Taking it for fun. Wow, good on you, Whitehall.

• 58:55Speaker 01

  Thank you very much.

• 58:55Mark Normand?

  How do you spell, you look like Jack Skellington here. What's the, you're drinking ale, you're eating snack adiums, you're watching food videos.

• 59:03Speaker 01

  Good metabolism? He runs, you said, though.

• 59:05Mark Normand?

  Alright, okay.

• 59:06Speaker 01

  I just, I just do an ultra marathon every day. I just, I want a body. And gay sex.

• 59:12Mark Normand?

  Oh, that's

• 59:13Speaker 01

  That does burn some calories.

• 59:14Mark Normand?

  Yeah, yeah, and it burns.

• 59:19Mark Normand?

  Uh, but yeah, you're in hell of a, LA must have gotten you, you're in good shape.

• 59:24Sam Morril?

  Yeah, how do you deal with LA if coming from London? What do you, what do you make of it?

• 59:28Speaker 01

  Um, I think sort of less is more.

• 59:30Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 59:31Speaker 01

  Dip in, dip out, um.

• 59:33Mark Normand?

  The driving, the phony.

• 59:35Speaker 01

  Well, I don't drive.

• 59:36Mark Normand?

  Oh.

• 59:37Speaker 01

  So I'm just like.

• 59:37Sam Morril?

  Can you not drive?

• 59:38Speaker 01

  Walk around LA as well, which is insane.

• 59:39Sam Morril?

  What part of town are you in?

• 59:40Speaker 01

  Well, I'm, uh, last time I was there, I was in Venice Beach, which is not an area you wanna wander around.

• 59:44Mark Normand?

  No, a lot of wackos. Yeah, a lot of RVs.

• 59:48Speaker 01

  Yeah. So no, I, I don't know. Would you, you know, like?

• 59:53Sam Morril?

  I don't hate it, but I think extended periods are tough for me there.

• 59:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 59:57Mark Normand?

  Yeah, it's not a real place, you know, like every, it's all built on showbiz. No one's actually from there. There's too much going on. But it's fun for a week.

• 1:00:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, fun, fun to dip in and dip out of.

• 1:00:09Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:10Speaker 01

  What's this? Charlie and the Chocolate Pepper?

• 1:00:11Mark Normand?

  Oh, sorry, I was doing Four in a Bed. I was anticipating Four in a Bed.

• 1:00:14Speaker 01

  Well, this sounds like another orgy, but.

• 1:00:18Sam Morril?

  What is it?

• 1:00:18Mark Normand?

  I don't know, what is it?

• 1:00:19Speaker 01

  No, this is just like, like British TV, daytime television that I really like. Four in a Bed.

• 1:00:25Mark Normand?

  Oh, that's a show?

• 1:00:26Speaker 01

  With me. They're both sort of similar shows and they're just like, like shows that are just orchestrated for people to be like dicks. They're, the Four in a Bed is like, uh, four sets of people that all, all own like little hotels or like a bed and breakfast. And then they all go and stay in each other's bed and breakfast. But then the premise of the show is that you're meant to like, mark down each other's bed and breakfast or hotel, but they're all like small, like family run businesses and it just encourages everyone to be a real like, cunt.

• 1:00:56Mark Normand?

  Oh, fun.

• 1:00:57Speaker 01

  Cause you have to go there and just like dig around and try and find things to complain about. And, you know, they always find like a little bit of dust in the cupboard and then they mark them down for that or say that the breakfast was.

• 1:01:06Sam Morril?

  So they get rewarded for bringing them down?

• 1:01:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, they get rewarded for bringing down someone else's like small business. And then at the end, you're given like a little tray of cash. And then the same is true with Come Dine With Me, which is the same premise, but for like dinner parties where you go around to a different person's house each night of the week. And then at the end, you have to score them down. And then it just, but it just encourages people to be a horrible. Guest. Wow, so this is reality. It's reality. It's so cheap. It's but it's just like a real fixture of British television. And you go around and you've just got to be like really snipey and rude about like an evening out. And then you you score them at the end. Oh, my wife would love this.

• 1:01:45Sam Morril?

  It's interesting because like Great British Bake Off, I feel like they're so nice.

• 1:01:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's really warm hearted and really nice.

• 1:01:51Sam Morril?

  But then you see chopped in in or not chop, but what's the other way? You always think of British people as like a Gordon Ramsay, a guy who's gonna like carry the shirt.

• 1:01:58Speaker 01

  Hell's future.

• 1:01:58Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:59Speaker 01

  Now, this just encourages like just really bit. There's a really famous clip of a guy getting really annoyed because his dinner party had been like torn to shreds by everyone else and someone else wins the tray of cash at the end. Oh.

• 1:02:13Sam Morril?

  Can we get that clip?

• 1:02:14Speaker 01

  Oh, it's such a good clip.

• 1:02:15Sam Morril?

  Heather shocked?

• 1:02:16Speaker 01

  No, wait, wait, wait. Go on, uh, uh, maybe videos or images and I'll find it. Uh.

• 1:02:22Sam Morril?

  I wrote crashes out, see that would it?

• 1:02:24Speaker 01

  No, no, no. Um, yeah, that that that's the man there, I think. I put angry man on a come dine with me. Um, and it's like one of those, it's like a famous sort of viral clip. That man, yes, you won, Jane. Oh, shit. He gets it.

• 1:02:41Speaker 05

  It's me.

• 1:02:43Speaker 01

  He's come last.

• 1:02:46Sam Morril?

  I I don't know why I'm yelling at me.

• 1:02:49Speaker 05

  Do you want, Jane?

• 1:02:51Sam Morril?

  Oh, my god.

• 1:02:52Speaker 05

  Enjoy the money. I hope it makes you very happy. Dear lord, what a sad little life, Jane. You ruined my life completely. So you can have the money, but I hope now you spend it on getting some lessons in grace and decorum.

• 1:03:08Speaker 01

  Damn.

• 1:03:09Speaker 05

  A reversing dump truck without any tires on.

• 1:03:12Speaker 01

  Woo.

• 1:03:16Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 1:03:19Mark Normand?

  Damn.

• 1:03:20Speaker 01

  Oh, they looked at cameras, wasn't they?

• 1:03:22Mark Normand?

  You've got a young John Oliver in there.

• 1:03:26Speaker 05

  So, uh, well done, Jane.

• 1:03:32Mark Normand?

  Well done, Jane.

• 1:03:33Speaker 01

  You won, Jane.

• 1:03:34Sam Morril?

  Those were some good insults.

• 1:03:36Mark Normand?

  I know.

• 1:03:36Sam Morril?

  The decorum of a backed up dump truck without tires on.

• 1:03:40Mark Normand?

  Without tires.

• 1:03:40Sam Morril?

  Wow.

• 1:03:41Mark Normand?

  He kept going with the, uh...

• 1:03:42Sam Morril?

  Was he Nick DePaulus?

• 1:03:44Mark Normand?

  I was thinking.

• 1:03:44Sam Morril?

  That was like one line after another.

• 1:03:46Mark Normand?

  Yeah, wait, before you go, I do your tours, but what do you hate about America? Real quick.

• 1:03:51Speaker 01

  This is my tour. This is Jack White.

• 1:03:53Mark Normand?

  Jesus.

• 1:03:54Speaker 01

  No, no.

• 1:03:54Sam Morril?

  You were really slipping, Sal. Between the gay porn and...

• 1:03:58Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:58Speaker 01

  No, that was intentional.

• 1:04:01Mark Normand?

  You got a real boomer back there. All right, what do you hate about America? Real quick, come on, give it to me straight.

• 1:04:06Sam Morril?

  Yeah, be honest with me.

• 1:04:07Mark Normand?

  I'm just curious.

• 1:04:07Sam Morril?

  There's gotta be something.

• 1:04:08Mark Normand?

  What's the zing on us? We zing you guys, the bad food, the bad teeth, the weather, you know, the royalty sucks.

• 1:04:15Sam Morril?

  London doesn't have bad food anymore, though.

• 1:04:16Mark Normand?

  All right, all right.

• 1:04:17Sam Morril?

  I think it's gotten good.

• 1:04:19Speaker 01

  I don't know, I feel like right now, we're just very thankful for you.

• 1:04:23Mark Normand?

  What?

• 1:04:23Sam Morril?

  Really?

• 1:04:24Speaker 01

  You're taking a lot of heat. It's just like...

• 1:04:26Sam Morril?

  Oh.

• 1:04:26Speaker 01

  You know, no matter what's going wrong...

• 1:04:28Sam Morril?

  We're getting the shit.

• 1:04:29Speaker 01

  Like, in the UK, just turn on the news and look at what's happening over here. It feels great.

• 1:04:35Mark Normand?

  Good point.

• 1:04:35Speaker 01

  Because we had like a bit of a moment with Brexit where it felt like, you know, our country was just sort of a bit of a laughing stock and carnage and then you guys have gone, "Hold my beer."

• 1:04:48Sam Morril?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:49Mark Normand?

  Good point.

• 1:04:50Sam Morril?

  Really great.

• 1:04:51Mark Normand?

  All right, I'll take it. What does it say? Every cul-de-sac has a dead end. There you go.

• 1:04:56Sam Morril?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:04:58Mark Normand?

  All right, all right, I'll pull those dates up, sorry. I thought we'd get something more vicious about America.

• 1:05:03Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:05:03Sam Morril?

  Sorry. Yeah, after seeing what you like to watch, I thought you were gonna be like, "Your country's like a reverse dump truck."

• 1:05:09Speaker 01

  Reverse dump truck.

• 1:05:11Speaker 01

  See Jack live. Oh god, yeah, that is.

• 1:05:15Mark Normand?

  Not currently on Tortsus.

• 1:05:16Speaker 01

  No, I might do at some point.

• 1:05:18Mark Normand?

  Oh, okay. Well, keep checking. Keep checking every day, folks.

• 1:05:22Speaker 01

  Keep checking. Maybe I, maybe I will do it.

• 1:05:25Mark Normand?

  And watch the burbs on Peacock.

• 1:05:26Speaker 01

  You can watch the burbs, though. That's definitely coming out on, on Peacock. So you could watch that.

• 1:05:30Mark Normand?

  All right, very exciting. And eh, you gotta get picked up for a season two, right? That's the goal?

• 1:05:37Speaker 01

  I guess so.

• 1:05:37Mark Normand?

  Okay.

• 1:05:38Speaker 01

  Hopefully.

• 1:05:38Mark Normand?

  Hopefully, yeah.

• 1:05:39Speaker 01

  They leave it open at the end, so there could be more. There's my face.

• 1:05:42Mark Normand?

  There he is.

• 1:05:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:05:43Sam Morril?

  Do you wanna spend more time in America? Are you like, this is good?

• 1:05:48Mark Normand?

  Good question.

• 1:05:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, no, I would like to spend, I'd like, yeah, if it got picked up again, a couple of months in LA in sort of January, February, it would be pretty nice. But yeah.

• 1:05:57Mark Normand?

  Sorry about Ellen. She moved out there.

• 1:05:59Speaker 01

  She moved out there.

• 1:06:00Sam Morril?

  She came back.

• 1:06:01Mark Normand?

  She came back?

• 1:06:01Sam Morril?

  I think she came back.

• 1:06:02Mark Normand?

  All right, you're welcome.

• 1:06:03Speaker 01

  I thought she was in the English countryside, isn't she?

• 1:06:05Mark Normand?

  Well, let her.

• 1:06:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, I saw her. I saw her in the English countryside.

• 1:06:07Mark Normand?

  Oh, no.

• 1:06:08Sam Morril?

  When you see her?

• 1:06:09Speaker 01

  Yeah. I was, I was in some random hotel in the Cotswolds and I walked past, I was like, I swear that's Ellen.

• 1:06:15Mark Normand?

  Oh.

• 1:06:16Sam Morril?

  Did you say what's up to her?

• 1:06:17Speaker 01

  I didn't. I did do a show once, when I was very young. I was one of those like, sort of people that they'd like plucked out of obscurity. I'd, I'd only been doing stand-up for a couple of years and I was like, I guess, this sort of interesting anomaly because I was, I don't know, nineteen, twenty, and I went on the Ellen show. And I remember, I didn't have many bits, but I did have one routine about KFC and I was really excited to do that. And then they said, oh no, you can't do that because she won't have any mention of meat products on the show.

• 1:06:44Mark Normand?

  Oh.

• 1:06:45Speaker 01

  Cause she's a vegan.

• 1:06:46Mark Normand?

  Right.

• 1:06:46Speaker 01

  I was like, I don't think that's how veganism works. Like, she is aware that, like, chicken exists.

• 1:06:52Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:53Speaker 01

  I'm, I'm not gonna be the one that like, le- lets her know about KFC and then that's gonna be what, you know, you know, bumps her off the, off the rails, but.

• 1:07:02Mark Normand?

  Yeah, you can still talk about men. She doesn't eat men.

• 1:07:04Speaker 01

  Well, they also said you can't talk lesbianism. Like, bring that up.

• 1:07:08Sam Morril?

  I have this long bit about cock that you can't.

• 1:07:10Mark Normand?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 1:07:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. But yeah, she lives in the British countryside now.

• 1:07:14Mark Normand?

  Sorry.

• 1:07:15Sam Morril?

  How was, how was she on the show? Was she, was she nice to you or not?

• 1:07:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, she was nice, yeah. But I, you know, I was like, I'd only met her like when I walked out onto the, onto the set. She was.

• 1:07:24Mark Normand?

  Sure.

• 1:07:25Speaker 01

  And I was a kid, so I think she was probably quite.

• 1:07:27Sam Morril?

  She walked off set and kicked the dog and then went to a green room and smacked an assistant?

• 1:07:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:07:32Mark Normand?

  Yeah, she's a lot.

• 1:07:33Speaker 01

  Comfort ate a bucket of KFC.

• 1:07:36Mark Normand?

  She used to have a lot of, she had Schumer on real young. She had a lot of young comics on back in the day. I don't know.

• 1:07:42Sam Morril?

  Yeah, you were on Fallon pretty young, weren't you?

• 1:07:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, I did. I, yeah, I did Fallon. That was my, my next TV appearance on, on US.

• 1:07:51Mark Normand?

  What about British or American comedy?

• 1:07:53Speaker 01

  Sorry?

• 1:07:54Mark Normand?

  What about American comedy? You guys hate it?

• 1:07:56Speaker 01

  No, I love American comedy.

• 1:07:57Sam Morril?

  American comedy is great. This guy.

• 1:07:59Mark Normand?

  Oh, sorry, sorry. My fault. I didn't know you had to go. My bad. All right. Where are you gonna be there, Sammy?

• 1:08:04Sam Morril?

  Well, when, when is this coming out? Yeah, we'll do it after.

• 1:08:07Mark Normand?

  Oh, get the hell out of here.

• 1:08:08Sam Morril?

  Yeah, get out of here. You gotta go.

• 1:08:10Speaker 01

  I can plug it.

• 1:08:12Mark Normand?

  What?

• 1:08:13Speaker 01

  I can plug your dates.

• 1:08:14Mark Normand?

  Oh, plug away.

• 1:08:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'll tell you. Sam's gonna be in Stamford.

• 1:08:20Sam Morril?

  Yep. It's all sold out. Those are all sold out.

• 1:08:23Speaker 01

  They're sold out. So if you're lucky, if you are, East Providence, these can't all be sold out.

• 1:08:27Sam Morril?

  They're sold out. It's a small venue, yeah.

• 1:08:29Speaker 01

  Early show and late show? Tampa, Florida. You're not as popular in Tampa.

• 1:08:34Sam Morril?

  Well, yeah, that one, I think, February 26th, I think we're still good.

• 1:08:37Speaker 01

  February 26th, there are still tickets to the third show.

• 1:08:40Sam Morril?

  Special taping, baby.

• 1:08:41Speaker 01

  That's special taping as well, so you could be on Netflix.

• 1:08:43Sam Morril?

  Tickets available for LA.

• 1:08:45Speaker 01

  Tickets are available for LA.

• 1:08:46Sam Morril?

  May 7th with Joe List, Rachel Feinstein and Jordan Jensen. And then, and then Lisbon, August 30th. And I'm adding a bunch of European dates. That's just the first one to go on sale, but.

• 1:08:55Mark Normand?

  Lisbon, the most, the prettiest city I've ever been to, hands down. Yeah, so look forward to that one.

• 1:09:00Sam Morril?

  I can't wait.

• 1:09:00Mark Normand?

  That's a great little town.

• 1:09:02Speaker 01

  Legal drugs and prostitution.

• 1:09:04Mark Normand?

  Is that right?

• 1:09:05Sam Morril?

  Really?

• 1:09:05Speaker 01

  Wait, I think that's right. You should check. You should definitely check. Double check that one.

• 1:09:10Sam Morril?

  Can you do Mark's now?

• 1:09:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:09:12Mark Normand?

  Good luck with these nails.

• 1:09:13Speaker 01

  Mark, you can see in Flagstaff, Arizona, the Orpheum Theater. You can go to another venue in Arizona.

• 1:09:20Mark Normand?

  Swaharita.

• 1:09:21Speaker 01

  Swaharita. Indianapolis, there'll be two shows there, an early and a late one, and, and a, and a third and fourth show.

• 1:09:29Sam Morril?

  I like the way he does it.

• 1:09:32Speaker 01

  Very popular in the Buffalo area. You can come along to Buffalo, New York. He'll be in the wonderful city of Portland.

• 1:09:41Sam Morril?

  Portland what?

• 1:09:41Mark Normand?

  Maine.

• 1:09:42Speaker 01

  Memphis, Maine, Portland, Maine. A lot of Portland's. Providence as well, Rhode Island.

• 1:09:49Sam Morril?

  This makes our show sound more dignified, too.

• 1:09:51Mark Normand?

  This is Masterpiece Theater.

• 1:09:52Speaker 01

  In Lexington, Kentucky, the, Dania Beach in Florida.

• 1:09:57Speaker 01

  We loved Ania Beach in Florida.

• 1:09:58Mark Normand?

  I do like it.

• 1:09:59Speaker 01

  Rayleigh.

• 1:10:00Mark Normand?

  Raleigh.

• 1:10:01Speaker 01

  Raleigh.

• 1:10:02Mark Normand?

  Sir Arthur Raleigh. What's that, NC?

• 1:10:04Speaker 01

  In, uh, New Cross.

• 1:10:06Mark Normand?

  Newcastle. Newcastle, don't you? No, North Carolina.

• 1:10:09Speaker 01

  North Carolina. Also in Lo- Los Angeles at the world famous Comedy Store. Moncton, Ne- Nebraska?

• 1:10:16Mark Normand?

  We don't even know that one.

• 1:10:17Speaker 01

  We don't know where that is.

• 1:10:18Mark Normand?

  New Brunswick, it's in Canada.

• 1:10:19Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 1:10:20Mark Normand?

  It's nowhere. How about this?

• 1:10:21Speaker 01

  Spokanki?

• 1:10:22Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:24Speaker 01

  Spokanki, Washington.

• 1:10:25Mark Normand?

  Yeah, Spokane.

• 1:10:27Speaker 01

  Washington. You'll be there in Philadelphia. You're a busy man. Philadelphia, Brookfield.

• 1:10:32Mark Normand?

  He really doesn't want to see this kid.

• 1:10:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:10:33Mark Normand?

  We gotta get out, gotta get out.

• 1:10:36Speaker 01

  Just do it like Harry Styles. Just do your 30 nights in New York and let them come to you.

• 1:10:40Mark Normand?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:41Speaker 01

  At this point.

• 1:10:41Mark Normand?

  He's very popular.

• 1:10:42Speaker 01

  You don't want to go to Brookfield, Wisconsin.

• 1:10:43Mark Normand?

  Yeah, right.

• 1:10:44Speaker 01

  Or, or, or, or Irvine, California.

• 1:10:47Mark Normand?

  Yeah, Irvine.

• 1:10:48Speaker 01

  Irvine, Irvine Improv, that's a good, um, club.

• 1:10:51Mark Normand?

  Good club.

• 1:10:51Speaker 01

  Tempe, Arizona.

• 1:10:52Mark Normand?

  All right, we're off in the June here. Well, we're good, we're good here, we got enough. They could read you, they could read the phone book. It would sound fun. So, yeah, thanks, Jack. That was great. Yeah, and now check out his show on Peacock, The Bear. Thank you.

• 1:11:03Speaker 04

  Sunday's the day for my next fender. A bit of Pivac, you know the future's close. I've had a little too much bourbon and Norman's talking shit about the fucking Pope. And I get down in the same way. Up on the roof like the cops coming and naked Samuel is feeling dangerous. I'm out to lunch here in New Orleans. This woman doesn't look like I've remembered. And I get down in the same way. We might be true.

• 1:11:50Speaker 06

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