E558 Katt Williams

Katt Williams is a stand-up comedian and actor known for his many movies and classic comedy specials. He is performing live on his “Heaven on Earth” tour now through May. Theo is joined by the legend himself, Katt Williams. They talk about what life has been like since his explosive interview last year, why he feels compelled to expose dark forces in the world, and what he thinks about Theo’s statue of him… Katt Williams: https://www.instagram.com/kattwilliams/ ------------------------------------------------ Tour Dates! https://theovon.com/tour New Merch: https://www.theovonstore.com ------------------------------------------------- Sponsored By: Celsius: Go to the Celsius Amazon store to check out all of their flavors. #CELSIUSBrandPartner #CELSIUSLiveFit https://amzn.to/3HbAtPJ Prize Picks: First time users, download the PrizePicks app, use code THEO and PrizePicks will instantly give you $50 on your first lineup of $5 or more. No strings attached. Moonpay: Looking to get into crypto? Head over to Moonpay.com/Theo to sign up. Tecovas: Go to http://tecovas.com/theo to get 10% off when you sign up for emails and texts. Blinds.com: With free samples sent directly to you, virtual design help and pro install services, you'll never shop for custom window treatments anywhere else. Use code THEO at checkout for $50 off purchases of $500 or more at http://blinds.com/theo. Manscaped: Go to http://manscaped.com and use code THEO to get 20% off and free international shipping at checkout. ------------------------------------------------- Music: “Shine” by Bishop Gunn Bishop Gunn - Shine ------------------------------------------------ Submit your funny videos, TikToks, questions and topics you'd like to hear on the podcast to: [email protected] Hit the Hotline: 985-664-9503 Video Hotline for Theo Upload here: https://www.theovon.com/fan-upload Send mail to: This Past Weekend 1906 Glen Echo Rd PO Box #159359 Nashville, TN 37215 ------------------------------------------------ Find Theo: Website: https://theovon.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/theovon Facebook: https://facebook.com/theovon Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/thispastweekend Twitter: https://twitter.com/theovon YouTube: https://youtube.com/theovon Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/TheoVonClips Shorts Channel: https://bit.ly/3ClUj8z ------------------------------------------------ Producer: Zach https://www.instagram.com/zachdpowers Producer: Nick https://www.instagram.com/realnickdavis/ Producer: Cam https://www.instagram.com/cam__george/ Producer: Colin https://instagram.com/colin_reiner Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Theo Von?

  You ever realize that you spent your entire morning thinking about lunch? It's 9 a.m. and somehow I'm already in negotiations with myself about how I'm gonna spend $20 on a sandwich at noon. And then I eat it, or you eat it, or somebody eats it, and then an hour later, you're just standing in the kitchen worrying about what you'll do for dinner. And that's one reason why I've been into Huell. The Black Edition Powder is a complete meal you have instead of food, not a shake on top of food. Their powder starts at less than $3 per meal, has 40 grams of protein, and mixes with water or milk in about 30 seconds. I like Huell's shakes because they're clean and it's quick.

• 0:41Theo Von?

  I just want to make sure I have everything I need to keep going the way I want to keep going in a healthy manner. So with Huell, basically, lunch went from a daily logistical problem to a thing I can solve in about 30 seconds. Make healthy eating simple. New customers get an exclusive offer of 15% off online with my code WEEKEND at huell.com/weekend. That's H-U-E-L dot com slash weekend. Thank you to Huell for partnering and supporting our show. Today's guest is, uh, well, he's the GOAT. He is an iconic comedian. He has a new tour going on right now called The Heaven on Earth Tour.

• 1:25Theo Von?

  He is labeled by many as an oracle, as the black crystal ball, I've heard him called. I'm thankful that he came down from the clouds today to spend time with us. Today's guest is Mr. Cat Williams.

• 1:52Theo Von?

  What's up, man?

• 1:53Speaker 01

  What's up, man? It's time.

• 1:58Speaker 01

  Good to see good old Theo Von.

• 2:00Theo Von?

  It's an honor, man.

• 2:01Speaker 01

  The world loves you, you know?

• 2:03Theo Von?

  Well, that's nice of you to say. I feel, uh, I feel like, I can't believe I'm around you, I think. You know, I feel like you seem like a, um, mythical figure.

• 2:17Speaker 01

  Right, well.

• 2:19Theo Von?

  You know, like, uh, um, sack squatch or, uh,

• 2:27Theo Von?

  like a unicorn or something like that.

• 2:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, you'll still feel that way by the end. Like, I won't ruin that.

• 2:35Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's, that's the, uh, good thing about people like you and I. Like, if somebody thinks that they like us, and they think they've made a connection with this person on the screen,

• 2:52Speaker 01

  when they're around us, it's legitimate because it was legitimate. You know what I mean?

• 2:58Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:59Speaker 01

  Like, um, if Theo Von wasn't successful, he doesn't have a different story.

• 3:06Theo Von?

  Right.

• 3:08Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? It's the same story. He lived that story. And, um, that's, that's why people gravitate to you because there's nobody like you.

• 3:20Theo Von?

  Well, thanks, man. I feel the same, uh, about you. I feel like everybody does.

• 3:26Speaker 01

  And you have a statue of me at your house, so, you know.

• 3:29Theo Von?

  So, yeah, thank you, man. Yeah, thank you for letting them even do that statue. What was that whole deal like with them, with Michaels? That's where I got mine, that was at Michaels.

• 3:38Speaker 01

  Right.

• 3:40Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 3:40Theo Von?

  Did you do, it wasn't a collab or what was it?

• 3:43Speaker 01

  Nope.

• 3:45Speaker 01

  Nope, they just robbed my image and likeness because they could.

• 3:54Speaker 01

  Because they were doing it for religious purposes.

• 3:57Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 3:57Speaker 01

  I allowed it to be.

• 4:01Theo Von?

  Well, thank you.

• 4:02Speaker 01

  We wish you a black Christmas.

• 4:04Theo Von?

  Look, I'd be honored to have one. I'd be honored to have one. Yeah, man, I, cause yeah, when I met that guy there, he said, we got two left, man, you know? And there was two hundred and one of them was marked down because it had a chip in it.

• 4:18Theo Von?

  But, um, it's still, man, it's an honor. I keep it up at my house year round. And people walk in and they're like, no way, that's Cat William right there.

• 4:26Speaker 01

  It is.

• 4:27Theo Von?

  And it's beautiful, man.

• 4:28Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 4:29Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 4:31Theo Von?

  You have a new, you have a new tour, man, and I, you know, I know people talk about touring in comedy a lot. And I want, I want to know what kind of keeps you still doing comedy? Like, did you, like, cause I think when we start out, maybe it's to be funny. And then some people get to this place where they want to have a message. Do you notice that kind of tone shift in your, like, desire to do it over time?

• 4:55Speaker 01

  I don't, I don't think so. Like, I, I, um,

• 5:01Speaker 01

  I always try to have a message just because I, I enjoy the fact that while laughing and joking, you might learn something you didn't know and have gotten it from a comedian. And I kind of dig that. But everything else is just continuing this conversation with my fan base. Like, these are my friends that I haven't seen since the last time I was here. And here's our discussion, furthering our relationship. So, um,

• 5:39Speaker 01

  it hasn't felt much like work.

• 5:42Theo Von?

  And this The Heaven on Earth Tour, do you, um, do you believe in heaven?

• 5:47Speaker 01

  Absolutely.

• 5:50Speaker 01

  And earth.

• 5:51Theo Von?

  Yeah, okay, all right. Yeah. Fair. Touche, man.

• 5:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 5:55Theo Von?

  Dude, I remember when I first, cause like, when I was growing up, we just had, uh, you know, you learned about heaven and stuff, but all the fan flits or whatever I'd seen at church or anything. It always had, uh, it was mostly white folks on it, right?

• 6:08Speaker 01

  Right.

• 6:08Theo Von?

  And then I went to a black church one time.

• 6:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 6:13Theo Von?

  It was, um, I think it's called Greater Starlight Baptist Church. That was in our town. And

• 6:19Speaker 01

  Shout out to Greater Starlight.

• 6:21Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, it was nice in there. This was in Covington, Louisiana. But, um, but yeah, they had.

• 6:27Speaker 01

  About thirteen miles from Slidell.

• 6:30Theo Von?

  Yeah, there you go.

• 6:34Theo Von?

  Wow, Matt Williams in the building, baby.

• 6:40Theo Von?

  But, and that's when I realized.

• 6:42Speaker 01

  Don't make me go girt.

• 6:43Theo Von?

  Everybody's.

• 6:48Theo Von?

  That's when I realized, oh, everybody's gonna be in heaven. That was the first time that I realized heaven was gonna be very diverse. I'd never thought about it.

• 6:56Speaker 01

  Right.

• 6:57Theo Von?

  And it was, it blew my mind. I was like, oh, wow, they're gonna have black folks in heaven, Asian folks. All types of folks are gonna be there, you know?

• 7:06Speaker 01

  It's truly the only place that white people are a minority.

• 7:10Theo Von?

  Yeah, huh.

• 7:11Speaker 01

  Is in heaven. Just because thousands of years went with nobody getting to go.

• 7:17Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 7:18Speaker 01

  Just because of

• 7:22Speaker 01

  fuck shit that they might not have even been involved in, you know what I mean?

• 7:25Theo Von?

  Yeah. Yeah, I guess I'm kind of, I don't know if I'm starting to look forward to it. I am excited about it.

• 7:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:32Theo Von?

  But I, yeah, I guess I get caught up in like a lot of worldly stuff, you know, like there's still things I wanna do here, that type of thing, you know?

• 7:38Speaker 01

  Really?

• 7:39Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 7:40Speaker 01

  You still got stuff you haven't done?

• 7:42Theo Von?

  Yeah, man, I got some things, yeah, some different things. I would like to write a book, I think.

• 7:47Speaker 01

  Don't, don't say what they are, but I'm saying just the fact that you got things that you're excited about doing, that's the, that's the joy of life. That's when you're living is.

• 8:01Speaker 01

  So many, that's why it's so difficult for these super wealthy people to be fucking happy. Like, they can do everything else, but they can't fucking be happy because they've lived all their dreams, they got everything they were trying to get. They, they wake up and they can't score a touchdown, no matter what. They, yeah, it's a terrible life. But guys like you and I that's still got stuff to try and taste and, you know, things to feel and people to be around, like, it gives life a, a wonderful meaning.

• 8:40Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 8:42Theo Von?

  Yeah, I think that is something that like if I stay kind of motivated and I have a plan a little bit, that keeps me a lot more like, okay, I want to do this. I still want to try that. Yeah. And I start to think, man, I'm running out of time, too. You know, if you really like to taste different things and smell different flowers and, you know, and see what's on in different gardens and stuff, then you start to run out of time.

• 9:06Speaker 01

  No.

• 9:07Theo Von?

  You don't think?

• 9:08Speaker 01

  No, because you had to be in the position that you're in now for you to be able to make some of these things happen. Couldn't have done them at thirty-four, twenty-four, fourteen, because circumstantially, you weren't ready. You weren't ready financially. You didn't have the time. You didn't know that's what you wanted to do. Now, at this place is when you can make those things happen. Like, you can do everything on that list of yours in twenty twenty-five with no fucking sweat. And your biggest problem in twenty-six is I gotta have a new list.

• 9:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, time is, time is one of the main things that's made up.

• 9:55Theo Von?

  Yeah, you think?

• 9:56Speaker 01

  I know.

• 9:58Theo Von?

  So it's just used as like a mechanism to what, limit our thinking?

• 10:02Speaker 01

  Well, don't say limit. You said that you like this thing because it gives control and it, and it puts things in its place. And that's what time does for us, so that we're able to keep track, you know? But, but the less you deal with time, you realize you have the right amount of time to do everything you gotta do every day, twenty-four hours. And you could make it an adventure every fucking day, like, hey, I could die tomorrow. What would that mean I would need to be doing today? How do I, you see what I'm saying? Like, not looking at it like, oh, I'm running out

• 10:46Speaker 01

  of time. No, no, no, no. Dead people ran out of time.

• 10:50Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 10:51Speaker 01

  Everybody else alive.

• 10:56Speaker 01

  You got thirty swim trunks. Do that for me.

• 11:01Theo Von?

  How you gonna say you got thirty swim trunks, but you ain't never been in an ocean, Joe Rogan?

• 11:09Theo Von?

  Bro, thank you for having a good sense of humor, man.

• 11:13Speaker 01

  That's what I am. I am a good sense of humor.

• 11:17Theo Von?

  Yeah, sometimes we forget about that along the way, man. You are. How long you wanna live for it then, you think, Cat? You gotta check out, you gotta... When you ever think about it?

• 11:29Speaker 01

  I was promised that I won't have to deal with that, so I don't...

• 11:37Speaker 01

  I don't consider it.

• 11:40Speaker 01

  I do know that...

• 11:46Speaker 01

  Yeah. I don't...

• 11:51Speaker 01

  I don't have any things that I have to do in order to go out the way I would like. So, that's a blessing and about one of the best you can get, you know? Is being okay with the body of work and the legacy and the feelings and the emotions that you left, you know? And I still haven't done my best, like comedically. Like, I'm still not my funniest. Like, I'm still not working hard enough. Like, I'm still not...

• 12:33Speaker 01

  I still haven't made a complete package of myself yet, so...

• 12:39Theo Von?

  Do you think some comedians start to feel like they have? And that that's a trap?

• 12:43Speaker 01

  Most comedians have, though. Yeah, I'm saying that becomes part of the career is the fact that a lot of guys that are doing comedy right now were funny from 1995 to 2004.

• 13:01Speaker 01

  They're still working.

• 13:02Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 13:03Speaker 01

  They're still generating income. They're still. But their best comedy is long behind them. They're not that comedian that was thinking something was funny and writing it down and figuring a way to get this to the people. And so, yeah, it happens.

• 13:24Theo Von?

  What sidetracks comedians? I guess it could be all types of things, huh?

• 13:28Theo Von?

  What sidetracks them from maybe fulfilling their, their, their?

• 13:33Speaker 01

  Excellence is difficult. But to be mediocre is no pressure. Like, you know what I mean?

• 13:41Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 13:42Speaker 01

  Like, if you don't feel like you have to be the funniest person that this crowd has seen tonight, then you don't. And there's nothing wrong with that. Nobody's gonna jam you up about it. They'll go, oh, you were funny. And for a lot of people, that's enough.

• 14:03Theo Von?

  How do you pick on, you've had a lot of openers, like, I've met a lot of your openers over the years here and there. Um, how do you choose them, man? How do you choose these guys or women?

• 14:15Speaker 01

  Um.

• 14:17Theo Von?

  You need a lighter?

• 14:18Speaker 01

  Whether you're, oh, no, no, I have no need. I apologize. Um. What, I choose them based upon whether, whether the, um, whether their point of view is unique to them. Like, I don't care what a comedian's talking about. That's your business. I don't, I don't care what jokes you're making or how your set flows. Um, but are you telling a story about you? Can people see this eight minutes, 12 minutes you're gonna do and know you?

• 14:55Speaker 01

  And have a chance to like you. Um, if you do that, then I, you can open for me. Because my allegiance is to the people out there in those seats. And I want them to see the very best comedians that I can possibly bring. Somebody they'll enjoy, whether they're male or female or white or black, just. Do, are, do they come to work? Do they have a show for you, you see?

• 15:23Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 15:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's what I care about.

• 15:26Theo Von?

  Yeah, I think when I was getting into comedy in the beginning, I didn't.

• 15:31Theo Von?

  I wanted people to know me, right? Like, I never, I like the jokes and I want them to, I want them to laugh and feel good and see different ways that maybe I think and stuff, but I wanted to sell myself. That's what I always thought, I think.

• 15:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 15:45Theo Von?

  When I first started, I didn't think, I, I don't want you to remember one joke. I, I want you to remember me, right? Like, I felt like this desperate.

• 15:52Speaker 01

  That's a star, though. See, you knew that you would be a star. That's different than a performer.

• 16:01Speaker 01

  A performer is based upon the act. What I'm saying is magicians ain't shit unless they doing magic.

• 16:08Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 16:09Speaker 01

  Right?

• 16:10Theo Von?

  Oh, oh, if I see them bitches, yeah, I feel.

• 16:12Speaker 01

  Right.

• 16:13Theo Von?

  Bro, come on, yeah.

• 16:15Speaker 01

  But a true comedian is above the comedy material. The jokes are secondary. We, we like this guy. And we want to hear what this guy has chosen to say to us about the topics of his choosing.

• 16:35Theo Von?

  That's who you are.

• 16:36Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? That's who you are.

• 16:38Theo Von?

  That's who you are, Cat.

• 16:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, takes one to know one.

• 16:47Theo Von?

  Yeah, you grew up in Ohio, huh?

• 16:49Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 16:50Theo Von?

  Yeah. Did you grow up by Dave Chappelle? You guys grew up near each other.

• 16:54Speaker 01

  Dave Chappelle's not even from Ohio.

• 16:56Theo Von?

  Isn't he? I thought he's from Dayton.

• 16:58Speaker 01

  I'm from Dayton.

• 17:00Theo Von?

  Are you really?

• 17:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 17:01Speaker 02

  Chappelle's from DC.

• 17:03Theo Von?

  Oh damn, my bad. Sorry.

• 17:05Speaker 01

  No problem.

• 17:06Theo Von?

  But he lives in Dayton now, though.

• 17:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, he has a lot of, he owns probably five million dollars worth of property out there.

• 17:13Theo Von?

  Damn.

• 17:13Speaker 01

  He's doing really well for our Dayton, Ohio.

• 17:17Theo Von?

  They got a beautiful museum out there I went to.

• 17:19Speaker 01

  Dayton's a wonderful place.

• 17:21Theo Von?

  Um, they have the Air Force Museum, I think it is, out there?

• 17:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, because we have Wright-Patterson Air Force Base that we're very, very proud of.

• 17:31Theo Von?

  It's awesome. Yeah, they have, um, I think Fat Man and Little Boy are in there. Is it the, or the plane that dropped?

• 17:40Theo Von?

  Those are planes that dropped the bombs on, I want to say it's,

• 17:46Theo Von?

  I want to say it's Pearl Harbor in there, maybe?

• 17:47Speaker 01

  Hiroshima.

• 17:49Theo Von?

  It could be Hiroshima. Little Boy and Fat Man.

• 17:52Speaker 01

  There we are.

• 17:57Theo Von?

  Yeah, that's what Rogan named his, um, the rooms of his comedy club after.

• 18:00Speaker 01

  He certainly did. The mothership.

• 18:03Theo Von?

  Yeah, they really get it over there. Um.

• 18:06Speaker 01

  You feeling the pressure?

• 18:08Theo Von?

  Of his interview?

• 18:09Speaker 01

  No, no, of, uh, Austin.

• 18:12Theo Von?

  Of moving there?

• 18:13Speaker 01

  Is Austin calling you?

• 18:14Theo Von?

  A little bit.

• 18:15Speaker 01

  They're trying to put pressure on you?

• 18:16Theo Von?

  A little bit. I didn't, like, at first I wanted to do my own thing, like, a lot of people were moving there.

• 18:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:21Theo Von?

  But now when I'm there, it just feels like it's a fun energy.

• 18:24Speaker 01

  It is.

• 18:25Theo Von?

  And there's people on stage, and you can go up and down that, uh, Sixth Street, and you can do five or six sets in a night.

• 18:33Theo Von?

  I mean, that's a lot of practice, and it's probably within eight hundred footsteps or whatever.

• 18:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:40Theo Von?

  So, that to me seems really remarkable. What's on your, what's, on the new tour, what's it like? Like, what's it like to still go out there? What's it like to, like, do you do In the Round? What's your show like? I've been to a Cat Williams show.

• 18:53Speaker 01

  Clearly.

• 18:54Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 18:54Speaker 01

  And what a blessing, you know what I mean?

• 18:56Theo Von?

  That's true. I still have it to look forward to.

• 18:58Speaker 01

  Right. And we, we just learned we got plenty of time, you know? But, um...

• 19:06Speaker 01

  It's like, um, I don't know. It's like a festival for laughs and good energy. And, um, there are different comedians before it gets to me. And so you get a chance to, um, get an overview of some of the, um,

• 19:36Speaker 01

  greatest comedians around the country and, and, and get a chance to, to see them. And, um, it's hosted by Monique and Monique is a super large figure in comedy. And, um, she has a great presence and, um, and then after all is said and done, then I come out and I, um, uh, congregate with the people for an hour. And, um, yeah. The best thing I think is probably the fact that you've gotten your money's worth twice before I get on stage.

• 20:15Theo Von?

  Amen.

• 20:16Speaker 01

  And I think that's the part I'm probably proudest of.

• 20:19Theo Von?

  Yeah. Were you, uh, what do you bring with you on the road? Somebody said you bring a cyber truck. Is that true?

• 20:26Speaker 01

  Um, yes, I, um, that's my work truck.

• 20:32Theo Von?

  I have a cyber truck. That's why I was just curious what you thought about it.

• 20:34Speaker 01

  When I, um, when I'm home on the ranch, that's my, that's my farm truck. I love it, like.

• 20:44Theo Von?

  It's funny. It feels like you're driving an email kinda.

• 20:46Speaker 01

  A what?

• 20:47Theo Von?

  It feels like you're driving an email. That's what I feel like sometimes.

• 20:52Theo Von?

  It just feels like I'm in the future, like you could floor it and just.

• 20:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, it does feel like a UFO.

• 20:56Theo Von?

  Yeah. Like you'll put the gas on Monday, like you'll floor and you'll fuck it. When it stops, it's fucking Thursday right there. It's like it just has like a, I don't know.

• 21:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's, it's, it's, um, it's a unique experience, you know?

• 21:13Theo Von?

  Have you met him? Have you met Elon before?

• 21:16Speaker 01

  No, no, I don't, uh.

• 21:23Speaker 01

  I don't generally enjoy the company of billionaires.

• 21:26Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 21:29Theo Von?

  Yeah, I'm trying to think if I know any good billionaires.

• 21:32Speaker 01

  Well, it's not that they're not good, but I'm saying. I I don't need to be reminded of my inadequacies.

• 21:39Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 21:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, like.

• 21:41Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 21:44Theo Von?

  What um. What you do for fitness, man? What's your fitness regime like? You got a regime each day or what's that like?

• 21:52Speaker 01

  The ladies keep me fit. I'm heavy in sexual relations and so um.

• 21:57Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 21:58Speaker 01

  That keeps you pretty, pretty fit. Um.

• 22:01Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 22:02Speaker 01

  I got a cold plunge in a jacuzzi and a sauna that I do pretty ritualistic um.

• 22:11Speaker 01

  And I've never been a gym guy. I got two torn rotator cuffs, so that kind of limits me.

• 22:16Theo Von?

  Oh, damn, both them bitches gone, huh?

• 22:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. So golf is basically how I. Stay um where I'm trying to be, but I've I've never been um.

• 22:30Speaker 01

  I've never been seven pounds under or over in my life.

• 22:35Theo Von?

  He that middle dog.

• 22:36Speaker 01

  Adult, like I I'm at one fifty, you know?

• 22:39Theo Von?

  On the dime, baby, he'll show up.

• 22:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 22:42Theo Von?

  He'll fucking checkmate a scale, baby. You know what I'm saying?

• 22:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, right, right.

• 22:47Theo Von?

  Yeah, I think I I like, what have I been doing recently? Swimming? Oh, there's you playing golf right there.

• 22:54Theo Von?

  Damn, kid, out there.

• 22:57Speaker 01

  Right, so you know, if you can get two twenty-two. Without your arms ever going above your head and do it consistently where it always. Ends up in the fairway, you're hitting. You know, fourteen, sixteen of eighteen in the fairway, you know, then this is. Then you can play the game a little better.

• 23:20Theo Von?

  Banging out there, yeah, well. You can't get them arms. I guess at a certain point, your arms don't need to go that high in there anyway, though. I'm trying to think of what I.

• 23:28Speaker 01

  Well, it would certainly, it would certainly give me more yards and a fuller thing. It's just. The rotator cuffs don't allow it, so I I I started golfing with these eighty-year-old guys that, you know.

• 23:47Theo Von?

  Them bitches, you gotta wait, you gotta.

• 23:48Speaker 01

  Like, they can barely get out the car, but then they come out there and outdrive you. Every shot is better than your, like, so they taught me how to, um, play golf under restraint, so as to not hurt myself, you know, so.

• 24:05Theo Von?

  And how'd you bang them cuffs up? What happened, you think?

• 24:09Speaker 01

  What you mean?

• 24:09Theo Von?

  How'd you, uh?

• 24:11Speaker 01

  Oh, I was, I was in, I was in the midst of a, uh, of a push-up contest.

• 24:19Theo Von?

  No way, you blew them out?

• 24:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:22Theo Von?

  Oh, man.

• 24:22Speaker 01

  But I was, I was probably at two hundred. I was doing too much.

• 24:28Theo Von?

  You did two hundred push-ups?

• 24:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, and tore the cuffs both.

• 24:33Theo Von?

  Damn, you ripped both them bitches, man? God, dang, boy, you better, okay? Pull up at a Jiffy Lube and get well, buddy.

• 24:43Speaker 01

  I understand the guy I'm going against, cause the way it worked is, you could do as many as you wanted, when you stop, it's my go and I got a match, you know what I mean? So.

• 24:55Theo Von?

  You took it to the limits, huh?

• 24:57Speaker 01

  He was a horse.

• 25:00Theo Von?

  You took it to the limits, man. Yeah, maybe, you could probably do some swimming safely, maybe I could see you getting.

• 25:05Speaker 01

  No, I'm an avid water guy, yeah, like.

• 25:10Speaker 01

  I'm in the water probably more than.

• 25:13Theo Von?

  You're that dark coy, baby, you out there.

• 25:15Speaker 01

  I love the water.

• 25:17Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 25:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, I, I pray underwater, like, cause, you know, evil, evil can't access you underwater, you know?

• 25:27Theo Von?

  Oh, that's interesting.

• 25:28Speaker 01

  A lot of people don't know.

• 25:30Theo Von?

  Is that true?

• 25:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, and, um.

• 25:32Theo Von?

  Maybe that's why a baby, a child is an amniotic fluid, huh?

• 25:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, like, water's super powerful, like a, like a living being. I'm sure that soon in the future, they will confirm for us that water is a sentient being and that, you know?

• 25:53Theo Von?

  Man, that's gonna be if they do that.

• 25:55Speaker 01

  Well, that's why all through our history, there was always gods of water, just because it's such a powerful force, you know?

• 26:07Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 26:08Speaker 01

  God, it's great.

• 26:09Theo Von?

  Yeah, I have a trouble out there. I think I'm just not the best swimmer, man. I never, I don't like to swim cap either. You know, I never liked putting that cap on. That just was not something that, um, that was my vibe, you know?

• 26:21Speaker 01

  What do you mean by not a good swimmer?

• 26:23Theo Von?

  I just, I don't like it, man. I don't like being out in there. I'm kind of a land dog. I like being on land. I respect water too much. I think I get too scared in it. I just, oh, yeah. That's it. I get scared in it.

• 26:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, you, you have to have a real respect for it, no matter what, like on a boat or regardless. Like, it's, it's one of those crazy things that, you know, it's beautiful and wonderful and it sustains life, but it has a thousand ways to kill you. And it, yeah, it houses the scariest in the whole world.

• 27:01Theo Von?

  Yeah, I just get nervous.

• 27:03Speaker 01

  But what, what are you like in a jacuzzi, though?

• 27:06Theo Von?

  I'm pretty chill, I think, you know? I'm okay in a jacuzzi, but even then, if nobody's around, I don't, I just don't know if I trust myself or not, not to, not to like.

• 27:15Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:16Theo Von?

  If I even, fuck, if I'm even driving through a long puddle, I fucking, I'll look at my watch and make sure everything's all right, you know? I just get.

• 27:22Speaker 01

  But you had a drowning incident in your past?

• 27:24Theo Von?

  I think I've just had some probably nervous experiences with it, man. We used to have a neighbor and this guy was probably, I don't know if he, he had like one of them big bathtubs they had at their house? And they would, uh, he would play, he would make us play Navy or something. He's probably a gay guy, but we didn't know, right? But he would have us playing Navy and shit.

• 27:43Speaker 01

  You have, you have more than six of those stories, so you can't, can't claim in it now.

• 27:50Theo Von?

  Yeah, we had, well, but he'd have us play, but it was just like a lot of, uh.

• 27:54Speaker 01

  It was a guy looking in, had you looking in buttholes, so I'm saying.

• 27:57Theo Von?

  Yeah, we had some fucking wild neighbors, bro.

• 28:01Speaker 01

  Some of these guys were certain gay.

• 28:04Theo Von?

  I don't know if they was gay, I don't know if they were.

• 28:09Theo Von?

  We're sure, we're sure what they were.

• 28:13Speaker 01

  You just made it through all the gauntlets, like as a participant.

• 28:17Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, bro, I'll fucking, I'll put a juke on a nutsack, you know what I'm saying, bro?

• 28:22Speaker 01

  Give me my four dollars.

• 28:27Theo Von?

  Well, I get we grew up this adult, but back then they had this more pedophiles and wildness, I think back then, man. People wouldn't it now it's all documented, you know?

• 28:36Speaker 01

  Right.

• 28:36Theo Von?

  But back then it was just people was more, you know? I remember we had a guy they call. One basketball coach had been like kind of tickling the kids a lot, right? And then the other guy called him and he said, he said, hey.

• 28:54Speaker 01

  He said, that's so natural. He said, that's so naturally like that's a thing that coaches can find themselves dealing with.

• 29:03Theo Von?

  He trying to get that three pointer out of you, bro.

• 29:10Theo Von?

  But they had, yeah, just, but they called him and said, hey, they said, Mr. Sharp, you say you can't, if you keep tickling the kids, you can't coach them no more. But that was it. There wasn't like a lawsuit or anything. It was just more, you know, stern activity. Don't do it. Don't do it like that. But we had, I mean, I don't, I don't fucking know, man. What was that? What were we talking about? Oh, Jap swimming people, swimming, man. Yeah, I never, I think I just get too nervous in water. I just, I know it's too powerful. That's what I know.

• 29:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:41Theo Von?

  I know it's way more powerful than I am, man.

• 29:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:45Theo Von?

  But it's so funny you like, yeah, cause I could see you, man. I think sometimes if I think about you, I think about you like. I could see you having like a show at a Sea World or something like that, you know?

• 29:57Theo Von?

  Like, you know what I'm saying? Matt, like a. The cat.

• 30:03Speaker 01

  No, it'll be a one night only.

• 30:05Theo Von?

  But still.

• 30:06Speaker 01

  Cause I'm letting all the, I'm letting everybody out.

• 30:08Theo Von?

  You free, bro.

• 30:10Speaker 01

  Like this is wrong.

• 30:11Theo Von?

  You freeing.

• 30:12Speaker 01

  Like I'm black. I'm not going to stand here in front of a prison and do a show.

• 30:17Theo Von?

  You freeing all the black fish on everything.

• 30:20Speaker 01

  All the fish.

• 30:21Theo Von?

  Every fish in the ocean, bro. Free Nemo, bro, till it's backwards, man.

• 30:26Speaker 01

  I don't know what happened yesterday. Everyone's gone.

• 30:29Theo Von?

  Dude, if they had one.

• 30:33Theo Von?

  If they had one night, though.

• 30:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:36Theo Von?

  I'm talking a five, three hundred and twenty dollar ticket. It's a pricey ticket, but it's a one night only. Cat Williams and the whales, baby.

• 30:45Speaker 01

  Right.

• 30:46Theo Von?

  Cat, fish.

• 30:49Speaker 01

  I got you.

• 30:51Theo Von?

  People, bruh, it'd be unprecedented, man. You know?

• 30:55Speaker 01

  Indeed, indeed.

• 30:57Theo Von?

  It would be unprecedented. People would love it, man.

• 31:00Speaker 01

  I think people are loving the fact that you're sharing new stories.

• 31:05Theo Von?

  Thanks, man.

• 31:07Speaker 01

  Right.

• 31:08Theo Von?

  Yeah, I like, I, I.

• 31:09Speaker 01

  So get back to the guy in his big bathtub.

• 31:11Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah. Roy was his name, right?

• 31:13Speaker 01

  Roy.

• 31:14Theo Von?

  And he ended up in the military. But at the time, nobody knew that, you know? We were just children and he was, uh, and he got a whistle or something. Somebody bought him a whistle. And so he would, uh, he would just have us like do these like little games or whatever, you know? And, um, and so I don't know if, I don't know if kids were violent during that or sometimes people would be aggressive or something. But I, I think maybe that made me nervous about water. My sister drown, almost drowned one time. I thought she did drown, she didn't, but she almost drowned once. So I think just stuff like that. We would go swim in a river and there weren't a lot of lifeguards. So I think that's super scary because, you know, you get caught with a current or something. It's just real. It can be a lot, you know?

• 31:59Speaker 01

  Which river?

• 32:00Theo Von?

  The river we were at, I think it was probably part of the Chafunkta, like a little tributary of it.

• 32:05Speaker 01

  Dirty water?

• 32:06Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 32:07Speaker 01

  That's scary, too.

• 32:08Theo Von?

  Yeah. Yeah, so it's that kind of atmosphere, I guess, maybe. Trying to think what made me so scared. And you know what? I don't know if I knew how to swim that great.

• 32:19Theo Von?

  Yeah, Chafunkta River. I don't know if I knew how to swim that great, to be honest with you.

• 32:26Theo Von?

  But yeah, I, I, I think, yeah, people could. I would love to see you do a water show of some sort one day. If you ventured out to that sort of thing.

• 32:35Speaker 01

  I, I appreciate the fact that you're giving me ideas of things that are unprecedented.

• 32:41Theo Von?

  Yeah, it'd be really cool, man.

• 32:42Speaker 01

  Nobody else has a water show. I love it.

• 32:48Theo Von?

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• 33:30Theo Von?

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• 37:12Theo Von?

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• 37:20Theo Von?

  Were you affected by the fires, Cat? Did y'all have any damage?

• 37:32Speaker 01

  I felt like everybody that I

• 37:38Speaker 01

  everybody in my work life lived in the Palisades. Like, yeah, it's a massive gut punch. Just the

• 37:52Speaker 01

  the lives and economies of people that have been destroyed. But this is how life, this is how life operates, you know?

• 38:04Speaker 01

  It's very humbling for there to be thousands of homeless millionaires, you know?

• 38:13Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 38:15Theo Von?

  Yeah, it's so surprising, man. I had a friend, I was talking to him.

• 38:20Theo Von?

  He said, hey, do you want me to go to your apartment and get your? I got a Jeep Cherokee out here. So you want me to go get it in case the winds change it? And I said, I think it's gonna be okay.

• 38:32Theo Von?

  And I said, what are you doing? He's like, I'm going to an audition. And it was just so wild that you had places that were completely disappear off the earth. And then you have a guy who's going to an audition at the same time, you know? Just that there's so many things happening at once in this. It's like, part of it is so affected and some of it is unaffected, you know? Kind of just was a dichotomy.

• 38:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, I feel that way every time I watch international news. You know what I mean? Just if you watch another country's news and see all of the stuff that they're going through that we never hear about or know about or, yes, it's crazy. L.A. is just so massive of a city, you know?

• 39:15Theo Von?

  Yeah, it's like a state almost in a way.

• 39:16Speaker 01

  Right, like, L.A. is like a collection of 100 cities, you know, that make this.

• 39:22Theo Von?

  That's a good point, I never thought about it like that.

• 39:24Speaker 01

  With Hollywood and Encino and Beverly Hills and all Compton, Gardenia and Inglewood and Hawthorne and Torrance and the city of Manchester and all of these places are fingers and pieces of the body that is L.A., so.

• 39:48Speaker 01

  There's no way for six or seven of those parts to be going through pain and the body to be okay. But by the same token, it has to be. You know what I mean? Like, if you break your finger, the rest of your finger's still got work to do.

• 40:11Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 40:12Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? Like.

• 40:17Theo Von?

  Yeah, yeah, oh, yeah.

• 40:20Theo Von?

  Yeah, mine.

• 40:23Theo Von?

  Yeah, sometimes I think about what it would be like, like if I were like another ethnicity, you know? You ever imagine like that? Like if you was an Asian guy?

• 40:34Theo Von?

  Like if you could handle it?

• 40:37Speaker 01

  No, I, um...

• 40:40Theo Von?

  You ever had dreams like that where you're Asian?

• 40:42Speaker 01

  I'm not sure if you have those when you're black. Like...

• 40:52Speaker 01

  I'm saying I was born black. So I was born a superior being, a superb specimen, if you will, as far as human creations are concerned. So I never wanted to be anything other than that. I wanted to know how other people felt. So I didn't, um...

• 41:23Theo Von?

  But you never like thought I want to be that?

• 41:26Speaker 01

  No.

• 41:26Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 41:28Speaker 01

  No. But, but, but maybe some of that is because I didn't think that was possible. Like, like, um...

• 41:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, like I I didn't I didn't see it from a um negative perspective. I I saw it from a positive perspective.

• 41:51Theo Von?

  Right.

• 41:51Speaker 01

  You know what I mean like?

• 41:52Theo Von?

  Like I'm in the driver's seat, I don't.

• 41:55Theo Von?

  Yeah, it'd be cool to be a passenger, but I'm I like the seat I'm in.

• 42:00Theo Von?

  That makes sense?

• 42:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, I didn't think that I didn't think that uh Chinese people were

• 42:08Speaker 01

  having more fun or doing

• 42:10Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 42:11Speaker 01

  better things or I thought they were doing different things and

• 42:15Theo Von?

  Yeah, they're doing fine.

• 42:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, and I was interested in knowing what those were, but it never dawned on me that they might be better.

• 42:22Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 42:22Speaker 01

  You know what I mean?

• 42:23Theo Von?

  Right.

• 42:23Speaker 01

  And I I had um I had white friends that were admirable, but I I didn't imagine being white. And I didn't think that they imagined being black, I guess, either. But you have a great imagination, which is what makes you world class, you know? Like you have to have that, because I I heard you tell the story of, you know, I know the stories.

• 42:54Theo Von?

  Yeah, I think because I think about that a lot, I guess, of what it would be like to be different ethnicities, if I could handle it. You know, if I would think it was fun.

• 43:06Speaker 01

  I don't think that you would be as different from yourself as you

• 43:11Theo Von?

  Or as a white guy.

• 43:12Speaker 01

  As you imagine that you would be.

• 43:14Theo Von?

  Oh, you would just be kind of the same, but just in different shape?

• 43:17Speaker 01

  Right, right. What I'm saying is, I don't I don't think that you you because

• 43:23Theo Von?

  So you think the thoughts and all are kind of the same, then you think?

• 43:28Speaker 01

  Like that's I'm almost certain. I'm almost certain that you, as a black guy, are

• 43:35Speaker 01

  Also not the norm. You're not.

• 43:39Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 43:39Speaker 01

  You're, um.

• 43:41Theo Von?

  I could do it, I think, man.

• 43:42Speaker 01

  Kind of a singular. Yeah, you can, you can.

• 43:46Theo Von?

  Okay, I would like, you know, if I've ever, I don't know what I'm saying, I'm trying to culture vulture, whatever, but I would like, if they ever give you, if they do, you know, if they let people, if I get to do reincarnation, I would put in an application under that.

• 44:00Speaker 01

  Okay, so let's, let's work this out. Let's work this out because if reincarnation is real,

• 44:09Speaker 01

  you have some say in it.

• 44:12Theo Von?

  That's right, because you probably get to apply or talk to the manager.

• 44:15Speaker 01

  I'm saying there's nobody else's opinion that will be more valued than yours, right? So, let's decide. So, so where are you coming back? What do you want to, what do you want to try first?

• 44:28Theo Von?

  Uh, which, uh, ethnicity, you mean?

• 44:30Speaker 01

  Don't go right to black.

• 44:32Theo Von?

  Okay, I won't. I'll wait, I'll wait, yeah, I'll wait at least around or whatever. I will do.

• 44:38Theo Von?

  I don't know if I, what I do, I don't, Asian seems so.

• 44:44Theo Von?

  It feels like you could, it feels easy to do, kinda. I hate to say that, it just seems.

• 44:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's racist.

• 44:50Theo Von?

  Sorry.

• 44:51Speaker 01

  No, it's okay.

• 44:52Theo Von?

  Okay. Yes, I said it. Asian people, oh, I would be Mexican, Mexican seems cool. It's, you're kind of almost, you're like a little black or whatever, but you're also, you're just.

• 45:06Speaker 01

  What was his name? That came in your school?

• 45:11Theo Von?

  Oh. Nuh-uh. No, the kid, the first Mexican that we ever had in our school.

• 45:17Speaker 01

  Not Constantine.

• 45:18Theo Von?

  No, Nicholas.

• 45:19Speaker 01

  Nicholas. Right. Right. So, you at least have some experience.

• 45:24Theo Von?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 45:25Speaker 01

  You know how you could show up, you know, and you could be a hero and

• 45:29Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 45:30Speaker 01

  not get ahead of yourself. Yeah.

• 45:32Theo Von?

  Yeah, I would go easy into it. I wouldn't let anybody know that I was, had been there, that I was, uh, it was my first time. You know, I think you'd have to be, cause sometimes I believe you have first times as a human even, like you meet some people and it's like, oh, this is this person's first time being a human. The soul, like this is

• 45:52Speaker 01

  Right.

• 45:53Theo Von?

  This is a damn newborn, you know?

• 45:55Speaker 01

  Right.

• 45:56Theo Von?

  And then you meet some people, you're like, damn, this person is a sensei, this person has been

• 46:00Speaker 01

  They've been here before.

• 46:01Theo Von?

  They've been here before.

• 46:02Speaker 01

  Right.

• 46:03Theo Von?

  But yeah, I wouldn't go do black first, man. I wouldn't, yeah, I would definitely keep that for like a, or I would, yeah, I would try, I would be, I would be honored to do it if they let me do it. That's how, what I would say.

• 46:14Speaker 01

  I, I don't, I don't speak for the entire delegation, but uh,

• 46:20Theo Von?

  And I would do my best, man.

• 46:22Speaker 01

  We would be, that's, again, as, as a black guy, we would be honored to have you um, come through

• 46:30Theo Von?

  Apply.

• 46:31Speaker 01

  Our path and um, the only reason I said, don't do it first is just because there are certain things that go along with it that you just don't know how you would handle it, you know?

• 46:42Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 46:42Speaker 01

  Until you got the dick of a horse and then you just gotta figure this thing out like.

• 46:48Theo Von?

  Fuck, yeah. Oh yeah, you gotta parallel park even, probably tougher.

• 46:52Speaker 01

  You know, everything is different.

• 46:54Theo Von?

  A little bit different, I'm sure. But yeah, it'd be, yeah, I don't know if I'd go, if yeah, I would like to, especially if I got to bring a friend, I would definitely do it, man. I could

• 47:04Speaker 01

  You don't get to bring a friend.

• 47:05Theo Von?

  Ooh.

• 47:06Speaker 01

  You make new friends with each of the, you see what I'm saying?

• 47:10Theo Von?

  Yeah. Uh, no, see, I wanna just have some safety, you know? Same reason I'm, I don't wanna be in the water, you know? It's just, when I feel risk, it makes me, I think, makes me feel nervous, you know?

• 47:23Speaker 01

  Right, but nervousness was created for that. That's, nervousness is a good thing. You're, you're supposed to feel that. But that doesn't dictate whether you continue. And, and, and if you can get a hold of that, understand that nervousness doesn't mean stop. The yellow light doesn't mean stop. The yellow light means be cautious.

• 47:51Speaker 01

  Right? And so when you feel those nerves, understand those nerves mean, okay, don't fuck around. But you can still enjoy.

• 48:01Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 48:02Speaker 01

  Yeah. So we're gonna get you closer to the water in 2025. And we're going to deal with some of these ethnic

• 48:16Theo Von?

  blockages, maybe?

• 48:19Speaker 01

  I don't think they're blockages. You're very open minded.

• 48:23Theo Von?

  Yeah, thanks, man. Yeah, they're not blockages. Yeah, just

• 48:25Speaker 01

  You're not dealing with blockages. You're dealing with uncertainty as to who you are in the universe and whether or not you belong in the places you feel like you.

• 48:41Theo Von?

  Man, that's interesting. That is kind of how I feel. Yeah, cuz I'm always thinking of what this other thing would be like, kinda.

• 48:49Speaker 01

  Right. Right, because

• 48:51Theo Von?

  I never thought, I never really thought about it like that.

• 48:55Speaker 01

  I don't believe this is your home planet, you know?

• 49:02Theo Von?

  Do you believe that most of the people here that are living right now, that this is their home planet?

• 49:14Speaker 01

  No. No.

• 49:18Theo Von?

  So you feel like it's more that we're, you feel like we're maybe a species from somewhere else that's been kind of, that landed here or that got?

• 49:28Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm. Um, all of the religions tell the same story. And all of the stories are started up there and then end up down here and then continue. And there's a reason for that, I believe.

• 49:49Theo Von?

  Do you feel like this is like a place we're supposed to learn something? Do you feel like it's a place that we're kind of just spending time?

• 49:56Speaker 01

  An experience. A destination.

• 50:02Speaker 01

  You and I are at an age where we remember when the video game experience wasn't what it is now. It was still a game, like Monopoly or something, you know? Where it is now, it's a whole different universe that you can live inside from your Xbox or your PlayStation. And in Call of Duty, you're an actual soldier and you get kills and deaths and eliminations. And when you then cross over to the PGA game, you have your actual golfer that looks like you and has the name you gave him.

• 50:46Speaker 01

  And he's really gonna go out there and do this 18 on Whistling Straight. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, then I go and get in my

• 50:57Speaker 01

  Podium One Sim Racer and I

• 51:02Speaker 01

  pick the car of my choice and I'm an actual racer. So that those experiences located in that console, that's this experience here on Earth that we're all able to share. And that's what would make that reincarnation possible. It just means, oh, yesterday I played that game and today I'm logging in this experience. And so, yeah, certainly a a universal college, if you will.

• 51:41Theo Von?

  Yeah. Yeah, sometimes I forget, I get caught up in the minutia of things, you know? And I forget to kind of have this bigger breadth of like,

• 51:52Theo Von?

  this is an experience, it's not a sentence.

• 51:55Speaker 01

  An experience in which you're winning.

• 51:58Theo Von?

  Right.

• 51:58Speaker 01

  And an experience in which you're in a better position than others who have been in this same.

• 52:10Speaker 01

  You are excelling in a, in a life in which you very well could have turned out to be nothing.

• 52:19Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 52:20Speaker 01

  Or another statistic, or just another forgotten body in a ditch. And tho- those were the hazards, right?

• 52:32Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 52:32Speaker 01

  And you, De'ovon, made it through all of that and negated all of those horrific possibilities and are here in this position, um, the best you've ever been, you know? And those are the facts. And if we tell ourselves more of the facts in our head, then we don't hear so much negative, you know?

• 52:57Theo Von?

  If we try and just focus on telling ourselves the facts?

• 53:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, of our, of how good we're doing. Like, we're much too hard on ourselves.

• 53:06Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, I feel that all the time, man. I feel like I don't know any other way to be almost sometimes, like, not in a bad way, but, yeah, I feel like it's, it's this constant sentence, you know, like, you gotta, I feel like there's always been this to-do list that I don't even make, and it's just always been there. Does that make any sense to you?

• 53:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 53:24Theo Von?

  That's how I feel all the time.

• 53:25Speaker 01

  Right.

• 53:26Theo Von?

  Like, whoo, I gotta do, you know, still have to prove it, you know, a constant of approving.

• 53:31Speaker 01

  This, all winners have that disease. It's, um, self-inflicted. It's for you. It's you doing that. And there's nothing wrong with that harsh management. It's what gets you to the point that you're at. But, um, if you have animals, you know that...

• 54:03Speaker 01

  A relationship doesn't do good with just control words, just sit and stay and there needs to be a connection fostered and treats are the best thing for learning, you know? And so treat yourself with those type of things as well, like don't forget to remind yourself

• 54:37Speaker 01

  of all of the people that you tell stories about and the fact that that was it for them. That little piece of the story you told, like, they didn't get better. Like, they didn't then change some stuff and go like you did.

• 54:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 55:00Theo Von?

  Do you feel like, who was like a role model when you were growing up? Where do you think you got some of your own influences from? Do you think it was from people like actually humans in the world? Or do you feel like you had kind of like divine thoughts that came into your head or guidance? Like, where did that kind of stuff affect you like when you were younger? Do you feel like?

• 55:18Speaker 01

  I got it all from books. Like,

• 55:23Speaker 01

  I got it all from books.

• 55:25Theo Von?

  What are you smoking, Ken? Sir, brother?

• 55:28Speaker 01

  You smoking?

• 55:30Theo Von?

  If it's hot, I can smoke it.

• 55:33Speaker 01

  That's right. He said, if it's not pot, I can smoke it. Yeah, it's for certain pot.

• 55:38Theo Von?

  Oh, it is?

• 55:38Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 55:39Theo Von?

  Oh, damn, brother. Yeah, yeah.

• 55:42Speaker 01

  Sorry, if you needed a cigarette, you could have.

• 55:45Theo Von?

  Yeah, I might have a cigarette with you, mate.

• 55:47Speaker 01

  Sure. What you're getting ready to have is not even available in this place

• 55:54Speaker 01

  that we live in.

• 55:56Theo Von?

  What?

• 55:58Speaker 01

  California, LA.

• 56:01Theo Von?

  Oh, they don't have Newport here?

• 56:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, they're not allowed to do mentors. So racist.

• 56:10Theo Von?

  Yeah, it's weird. You can burn down a whole town, but you can't have a Newport.

• 56:14Speaker 01

  Right.

• 56:18Speaker 01

  Right. And your blackness begins.

• 56:21Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 56:26Theo Von?

  Yes, sir.

• 56:29Theo Von?

  Sorry.

• 56:30Speaker 01

  That is.

• 56:30Theo Von?

  I love that a lot.

• 56:32Speaker 01

  Yes, sir.

• 56:34Theo Von?

  We had some cool black kids growing up in our area, bruh.

• 56:37Speaker 01

  Right. Right. Your basketball team pitcher is just so wonderful.

• 56:45Theo Von?

  Oh, thanks, man. Cal Jackson on there, Don Galatas, he had a child.

• 56:51Theo Von?

  Number thirty-four, our basketball pitcher, we had a lot of good kids in there, man.

• 56:55Speaker 01

  Right.

• 56:55Theo Von?

  Shout out James Gray, his dad ran a car, uh, tire place. He was in there. There's Vincent, he got all the ladies Vincent, dude.

• 57:07Theo Von?

  And Johnny, that's Big Johnny, he was damn eleven feet tall, baby. He had birds living on his shoulders, baby, he was up there.

• 57:15Speaker 01

  Look.

• 57:16Theo Von?

  We had a lot of cool kids in our area.

• 57:18Speaker 01

  That's how we know everything is perception for you, you know what I mean? Because you gave two whole different sizes for two niggas that's the same size. You can see, you can see they ain't the same size in the picture, you know? That he doesn't let that change his story. One of them was seven foot seven, he was bigger than all the trees. The one was six foot one, here they are together.

• 57:46Theo Von?

  Bruh, Johnny was so tall, he had windows on the side of his head, but he was tall, man, he was.

• 57:51Speaker 01

  No, you were kneeling down.

• 57:52Theo Von?

  Yeah, countless stories. Yeah, I'm out of here, that's true. You're right.

• 58:00Theo Von?

  I was kneeling down, man.

• 58:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, but these, these experience, like, no matter what, like, that dude number thirty-four, like, we wanna hear his stories.

• 58:10Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 58:11Speaker 01

  Like, we know he's got stories and we wanna know if he'll tell the stories. And the fact that that's what you do is why.

• 58:20Theo Von?

  Well, thanks, man, thanks for, uh, thanks for the nice words, I appreciate it. You do a great job too, man. Thank you for all the joy over the years. Um, you just bought a military base, is that right?

• 58:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, formerly Fort McClellan.

• 58:41Theo Von?

  Fort McClellan, and was it an active base till recently, or?

• 58:45Speaker 01

  Um, I think it decommissioned in nineteen ninety-nine.

• 58:50Theo Von?

  What's it like over there?

• 58:53Speaker 01

  Magnificent, magnificent. It's gonna be, um, one of the greatest things that I personally have ever done, but it's, um.

• 59:02Theo Von?

  This is it?

• 59:04Speaker 01

  That's, um, the front side of the beginning of the campus, which is thirty buildings. Um.

• 59:15Theo Von?

  Wow.

• 59:15Speaker 01

  Three million indoor square feet, uh, four and a half miles of roads, like, you know, we got the, we got the best parts of the base. They had, um, chemical testing and stuff. We don't have those parts of the base. That's the Department of Homeland Security, but, um, yeah, we just have a wonderful blessed space at the foothills uh, of the mountains and, uh, it's, it's really magical and, um, I was able to see what Tyler Perry was able to do with two or three hundred acres and a military base.

• 59:59Theo Von?

  Yeah, it's amazing.

• 1:00:00Speaker 01

  And how you could, um, m- make a movie studio out of that. And so, yeah, we're, um,

• 1:00:10Speaker 01

  yeah, I,

• 1:00:11Theo Von?

  It's unbelievable.

• 1:00:12Speaker 01

  It hit the news recently, but I purchased it, um,

• 1:00:19Speaker 01

  years, a couple of years back. Yeah, I've had, so we've been working.

• 1:00:24Theo Von?

  Was that a tough step to like, take that? Like, okay, we can get this and we can do this. Like, did you reach out to Tyler Perry? Because I know he has like, in Atlanta, he has an amazing space. He may have many spaces now. This was three years ago. I went to a space to train for something and they were, it was unbelievable.

• 1:00:42Speaker 01

  No, no, no. I wasn't, I wasn't looking dinner now for assistance. Like, we, we, we can do this. I just needed to be able to have a home where

• 1:00:59Speaker 01

  great movies and entertainment product could be made without any of the shenanigans that are generally involved with Hollywood and be able to crank them out. And that all it needs to do is be good. If it's good, we're gonna make it. And so, even though it might have appeared from interviews of me that, you know, this guy just loves tearing people apart, really, you know, we're trying to create something where it can provide a platform for a lot of people to show what they do. So, yeah.

• 1:01:44Theo Von?

  So it would be a place where you could make other people's kind of dreams come true, like with film, television, that sort of thing?

• 1:01:50Speaker 01

  Right, where you can just basically have a great script and a great cast and leave your troubles at the door and walk out with the movie in the can. You know what I mean? Like.

• 1:02:08Theo Von?

  Oh, I like that. I like that, doing things yourself.

• 1:02:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:02:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, because they'll, they'll let the comedy movie industry die if we allow it. You know what I mean? And nobody in the fanbase ever said, hey, we don't want any more funny movies.

• 1:02:27Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:28Speaker 01

  Nobody said that. None of the fans ever were like, hey, we're tired of laughing in the movies. Yeah, boo to the co. No one ever said that. They just decided, you know, we make more money in the superhero action department. Let's just do all those.

• 1:02:47Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:48Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? And so it'll just take for somebody in the comedy sphere to start producing.

• 1:02:58Speaker 01

  Funny shit, and there we go again.

• 1:03:00Theo Von?

  Do you already have projects kind of on tap?

• 1:03:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, we got a slate. Uh, well, I'm not allowed to really answer that question, but yeah, like, um.

• 1:03:14Speaker 01

  It's a great, it's a great location where it is, you know, like it's an hour and a half from uh, Atlanta or less. It's forty-five minutes from Birmingham, you know? Um, and I, I love that area and they're so thirsty to be involved, you know? That, um, we have equal thirst, so everybody wants it to work and so it will, yeah.

• 1:03:41Theo Von?

  Amen. Dude, that's exciting, huh?

• 1:03:43Speaker 01

  It is. It is.

• 1:03:45Theo Von?

  Will you have you kind of your hand in on most of the projects, kind of, like? Um, is that a weird question?

• 1:03:52Speaker 01

  That's kind of, it's kind of, um.

• 1:03:57Speaker 01

  It's kind of not necessary for how

• 1:04:02Speaker 01

  for how it's set up. It's set up, um, in much of the way the grocery store is set up. So my job is just to make sure that all of the food that we sell in this grocery store belongs in this grocery store. You see what I'm saying? Is it a good quality? Oh, we'll get it in there. The people will want to see that. Yeah, they'd love that. Yeah, the cherry plums. Yeah, they'd love that, you know? And once that is, um, once that barrier is crossed, then we're just trying to make the best project for you and to make your smaller budget, um, be able to compete with the larger budgets.

• 1:04:48Theo Von?

  Yeah, cuz comedy, you don't need the really big budget either.

• 1:04:51Speaker 01

  It just needs to be funny.

• 1:04:52Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:53Speaker 01

  It needs to be funny, but it also, it also can't be under budgeted, though. See, they can't.

• 1:05:00Theo Von?

  It's gotta be professional.

• 1:05:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, it, it, it cannot look cheap.

• 1:05:05Speaker 01

  Regardless, which means it can't be, you know, and that goes to the equipment and to the lighting, and that's why you need hundreds of acres of space to be able to have all of what we're having. Like, they're, they're building an amphitheater and, you know, we have sound stages and a whole auditorium and, you know.

• 1:05:29Theo Von?

  Hell, yeah.

• 1:05:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's, um.

• 1:05:31Theo Von?

  That's, that's.

• 1:05:32Speaker 01

  Pretty nice.

• 1:05:33Theo Von?

  Instead of seeing if you have the cards, that's owning the deck, really, you know? Like, instead of waiting to get dealt the cards, that's like saying, we're gonna have, we're gonna, it's just saying you're gonna have, you're gonna make sure that things can happen.

• 1:05:47Speaker 01

  It's like you having a podcast. It's like, it's almost a no-brainer. Like, it makes sense.

• 1:05:52Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:52Speaker 01

  You know?

• 1:05:53Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:53Speaker 01

  It's something you know you can pull off. It's something that you know you're invested in. It's something you know you do well, you know, and so, yeah, it's that part.

• 1:06:04Theo Von?

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• 1:06:47Theo Von?

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• 1:07:27Theo Von?

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• 1:08:05Theo Von?

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• 1:08:49Theo Von?

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• 1:09:30Theo Von?

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• 1:10:08Speaker 01

  I have wives, but no.

• 1:10:10Theo Von?

  Yeah. Yep.

• 1:10:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm a happy, happy man.

• 1:10:22Theo Von?

  Yeah, sometimes I thought, I've been thinking a lot about getting married, but I don't know if sometimes it's like an outside pressure that I feel, or if it's just like something I would like to have that family, you know? Like that, you know, I think you always have like an idea of what a family is, you know? So sometimes I feel like that's something I want to try to make happen, you know? It seemed like it'd be a real challenge.

• 1:10:45Speaker 01

  Scared of marriage, but I was scared of divorce. Like, my, my parents didn't get divorced. My parents are still together.

• 1:10:57Theo Von?

  Oh, wow.

• 1:10:58Speaker 01

  Like, so I, I never, I always felt like you only do this one time, you know? And I was always more happy of the bullets I had dodged than the people that, wow, I thought I, I could have, I would have married her. Like, I was ready to ma- you know what I mean?

• 1:11:18Theo Von?

  Yeah, then you'll see them years later and you're like, oh.

• 1:11:21Speaker 01

  You're like, oh my God, so. Yeah, happiness is what I'm after, not um titles or idealistic situations like um I just wanna provide happiness and be provided that as well. And if you can get that situation regardless of what it's called.

• 1:11:47Theo Von?

  Yeah, maybe I get too stuck on the, yeah, maybe I sometimes do get too like uh feeling like I have to fill in the blanks as opposed to um what do I really wanna create?

• 1:11:59Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:11:59Theo Von?

  You know? Like or being like, what if I didn't get married? What would people think? You know, sometimes I get that stuck in my head, you know?

• 1:12:06Speaker 01

  Um, yeah.

• 1:12:08Theo Von?

  I guess it's normal, but.

• 1:12:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, like I

• 1:12:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, I like I I don't

• 1:12:19Speaker 01

  I would hate to be put in a situation where I have to cheat on somebody, you know what I mean? And I kind of feel like, what was the point?

• 1:12:28Theo Von?

  Yeah, yeah, I don't wanna set myself up for, that's a good point, too. I don't wanna set myself up for a situation that would be uncomfortable for me, or I would hurt somebody else's feelings either.

• 1:12:37Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:12:38Theo Von?

  Yeah, that's something I would not enjoy um.

• 1:12:41Speaker 01

  But remember, as you you in your next life, you know, you got a black woman coming, so things are gonna change.

• 1:12:49Theo Von?

  Oh, lordy.

• 1:12:51Speaker 01

  Things are gonna change.

• 1:12:53Theo Von?

  It's gonna be something.

• 1:12:55Speaker 01

  It's gonna be something.

• 1:12:56Theo Von?

  God!

• 1:12:57Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:12:59Theo Von?

  Um, yeah, I'm gonna.

• 1:13:00Speaker 01

  Have you experienced a black woman?

• 1:13:02Theo Von?

  Um Yeah.

• 1:13:07Theo Von?

  Pretty much. I I mean, I haven't dated just a black lady.

• 1:13:10Speaker 01

  She wasn't, she wasn't our best representative.

• 1:13:13Theo Von?

  No, I mean, there's a cute black lady I met at the airport that I would, that if I see her again, I would, I would, I think I would try to ask her out, but I haven't seen her again, but um, but I would be open to dating a cool, cool black lady.

• 1:13:25Speaker 01

  Hold on, hold on, let's talk specifically.

• 1:13:27Theo Von?

  Okay.

• 1:13:28Speaker 01

  About this one you're talking about.

• 1:13:30Theo Von?

  Yeah, she just looked like really confident and nice smile.

• 1:13:37Theo Von?

  And pretty eyes and I was like, man, there's just something about her.

• 1:13:40Speaker 01

  Okay, alright, and she was where?

• 1:13:43Theo Von?

  That I admired, she was working at the airport.

• 1:13:45Speaker 01

  Working at the airport, that's.

• 1:13:47Theo Von?

  So she was a worker, she liked to work, she doesn't mind work like so.

• 1:13:49Speaker 01

  Hey, hey, they're beautiful. What, which airport was this?

• 1:13:53Theo Von?

  This is at LAX.

• 1:13:54Speaker 01

  You bet it was.

• 1:13:56Theo Von?

  Yeah. So she was TSA approved too, you know, so.

• 1:14:01Speaker 01

  Right, right.

• 1:14:02Theo Von?

  So yeah, if I see her again, I would try to.

• 1:14:04Speaker 01

  No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, we're seeing her again.

• 1:14:08Theo Von?

  Okay.

• 1:14:08Speaker 01

  We're seeing her again, because you have this feeling already. You're only saying it like, well, you never know, I might not see, you're going to see her again. Absolutely, because we, yeah, you're gonna ask her out. Beautiful, fantastic, oh. She might, no, she's not watching. She might be watching, I don't know. She might be watching.

• 1:14:32Theo Von?

  Do you do that, you put things like into, do you like, do that, like speak things into existence type of thing?

• 1:14:39Speaker 01

  I'm not powerful enough to do that, but I don't ignore things that I see in existence.

• 1:14:50Speaker 01

  So what I'm saying is, I'm not going to ignore the fact that you're not saying abstract. You know, if I saw a black woman that did something for me, I'd, I'd ask her out. No, you, you actively saw one.

• 1:15:07Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, and this is recent.

• 1:15:09Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:09Speaker 01

  Right. Right.

• 1:15:11Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:11Speaker 01

  And, and, and it's gonna be life changing.

• 1:15:17Theo Von?

  Yeah?

• 1:15:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:15:19Theo Von?

  Are black women a lot different, do you think?

• 1:15:23Speaker 01

  Yes, yes, like, yes, like, you know, black guys, right?

• 1:15:30Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:32Speaker 01

  Black women are nothing like black guys. Like.

• 1:15:38Speaker 01

  Like, I don't wanna put so much pressure on this lady at the, at the airport, but, but. She, she doesn't know we've had this conversation, no.

• 1:15:49Theo Von?

  No.

• 1:15:49Speaker 01

  Magnificent creatures, okay.

• 1:15:55Speaker 01

  In slavery, black women were appreciated. You understand how difficult that is?

• 1:16:05Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:05Speaker 01

  That's some hard shit to pull off.

• 1:16:07Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:10Speaker 01

  I hate you guys, but not all of you. Some of you are wonderful. Uh huh. Precious beings. Yeah, yeah, that's, black women are, um,

• 1:16:27Speaker 01

  almost unreal. And, and only because what it is that they possess, they don't,

• 1:16:37Speaker 01

  it's not on purpose. Like, you know how we feel about people on the spectrum, like?

• 1:16:42Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, they're magic.

• 1:16:45Speaker 01

  Right. The reverence that you and I have for that community, right? You're gonna feel that with black women.

• 1:16:54Theo Von?

  Wow.

• 1:16:55Speaker 01

  Like, they're really where the word nurture comes from, from. You know what I mean? Like, the ability to give you something as a man that you've never had before or felt before and make it comfortable for you to access that, like, no.

• 1:17:17Theo Von?

  Really?

• 1:17:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, really life-changing.

• 1:17:21Theo Von?

  Yeah, man, cuz I, yeah. That, that, yeah, this could be part of my 2025, man.

• 1:17:28Theo Von?

  It is.

• 1:17:28Speaker 01

  It clearly is, right?

• 1:17:30Theo Von?

  Right.

• 1:17:30Speaker 01

  Right, we've said it.

• 1:17:31Theo Von?

  Here we are. We've said it.

• 1:17:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:17:34Theo Von?

  Well, you had a lot of, last year, you, it seemed like you had a lot of predictions last year. You kind of became this oracle last year.

• 1:17:42Theo Von?

  Did you feel that? That people came, you, they almost, you almost became kind of like this, uh, like a little bit of like a crystal ball, you know?

• 1:17:53Speaker 01

  Um, I, I'm.

• 1:17:57Speaker 01

  I'm honored to get to say the things that I say when I'm saying them and

• 1:18:06Speaker 01

  because you know that I operate from a positive first standpoint in all things like I assume that it's going to work out for the best and I understand that if it is for the worse then I'm prepared to handle that as well but

• 1:18:31Speaker 01

  yeah it was something.

• 1:18:34Theo Von?

  Did you start to worry any about your own safety and stuff because it seemed like you've really had some moments where you're kind of

• 1:18:41Theo Von?

  you know almost channeling truths into

• 1:18:47Theo Von?

  the world?

• 1:18:53Theo Von?

  And some people don't like that, you know, some people don't wanna, I mean the dark side of things doesn't really probably enjoy that.

• 1:19:01Speaker 01

  Well, what it was that I was attempting to do was impossible. So before I do this interview, there is no Illuminati. It's just a joke. It's just something that crazy people talk about. There's no such thing as our side and God's side. None of that is even real. I gotta come and make it real. I have to come and say, no, no, no, no. Everybody's not the same. There, so that's why when I said that, nobody came out and went, that's not true. I'm on God's side.

• 1:19:38Speaker 01

  Like, none of them. I, I, I'm just, the conversation was to show that there are spiritual things going on in the world and that there are things that are bigger than just.

• 1:19:54Speaker 01

  Coincidence and that a ritual is something that you do over and over and over again a certain way. You see what I'm saying? If part of the ritual is wearing a dress, then we should be able to look through entertainment and see all of these people being made to wear a dress. That's what a ritual is. You know what I mean? Like, whether they're white or black, that doesn't matter. There's, there's not other jobs where this is a requirement. Why is this? Why is this so necessary?

• 1:20:36Theo Von?

  Yeah, you don't see the dog catcher show up every, you know, every other year.

• 1:20:40Speaker 01

  I guess not a thing.

• 1:20:42Theo Von?

  In a nice skirt or you don't see an electrician.

• 1:20:44Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:20:46Theo Von?

  Come up in a blouse every now and then.

• 1:20:48Speaker 01

  Right. I'm saying, a lot of people that doubt what you say, don't read and they haven't been readers. You know what I mean? Like, books were my life, literally. I, I thought that I could learn enough information to be an important person. You know what I mean? So I'm, I'm actively trying to eat information, like.

• 1:21:18Theo Von?

  Do you have a favorite book?

• 1:21:22Speaker 01

  No. No, no, no. Like, even when I said, how many books I read, like, people are thinking, maybe I'm reading nine hundred pa- no, no, no. I'm reading a hundred and fifty, two hundred page books and I'm reading as many of them as I can because I'm trying to earn these pizza parties and these other weekly reader things that exist. My parents don't even celebrate holidays. I gotta get my own gifts, bitch. I'm finna read myself into.

• 1:21:59Theo Von?

  Into a t-shirt and a personal pan pizza.

• 1:22:02Speaker 01

  Right. So, so, so I got those books and then I got the ones I'm trying to learn from.

• 1:22:08Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:22:09Speaker 01

  You know? And those are separate, but.

• 1:22:12Theo Von?

  What was your question? Do you have a first book that you remember reading? Like, a one that got read to you when you were a kid or something that you really liked? Like a, like a book that set it off for you that was like, oh.

• 1:22:23Speaker 01

  Um, I.

• 1:22:26Speaker 01

  I read the Bible first. That's sixty-six books. So.

• 1:22:34Speaker 01

  So, yeah, it kind of um was my starting point in book reading. But it it's a it's not set up like a book technically. It's very disjointed.

• 1:22:48Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:22:49Speaker 01

  So I found that everything else I read was an easy read. You know what I mean? Like, I I loved reading all of the classics because I felt like I was literally in this story. You know what I mean? And I could read multiple books at once and, you know, I I um I was completely enthralled with reading.

• 1:23:17Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:23:20Theo Von?

  Yeah, just the idea of being able to take myself into a different place, you know? It was like, and and it really, I mean, words were really just fuel for your imagination. It's like, that's how you would get your head going, you know?

• 1:23:32Speaker 01

  Right, but I didn't I didn't want to use my imagination. I wanted this imagination.

• 1:23:39Theo Von?

  Oh, you wanted the information.

• 1:23:41Speaker 01

  I wanted to know what Huckleberry Finn and I wanted to know what they were doing. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I wanted the adventures, you know what I mean? Like, I was reading everything. Nancy Drew mysteries, like every, like, anything I could get my hands on. The Hardy Boys, like, I'm I'm reading that and.

• 1:24:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, so so many different stories that um.

• 1:24:18Speaker 01

  You get, you start understanding what it takes to for someone to be a winner in life.

• 1:24:26Theo Von?

  Hmm.

• 1:24:27Speaker 01

  You know? And you find out from reading thousands of books that.

• 1:24:33Speaker 01

  If you can list the fucked up things that have happened in your life and you can put that on a list and you've somehow made it past all of this to be in a position where you can still go make some stuff happen. That's what you have in common with every hero of every story of every autobiography of every.

• 1:25:01Theo Von?

  Wow.

• 1:25:02Speaker 01

  Is that.

• 1:25:03Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:04Speaker 01

  Is how much happened to you that should have broke you, that did not break you so that you were able to then.

• 1:25:13Theo Von?

  Fucking ride. Amen.

• 1:25:16Speaker 01

  Amen.

• 1:25:17Theo Von?

  Did y'all, um, yeah, I'm trying to think of some of my favorite books when I was a kid. I don't even remember. When I was young. We're the Red Fern, bro. We had to read all kind of shit. They had one book that kept killing this dog in it. I felt so bad for him.

• 1:25:36Speaker 01

  How many times can you kill a dog?

• 1:25:38Theo Von?

  I mean, they kept, that thing was fucking really dead. I don't remember that. I don't know who wrote that bitch, but I think Stephen King wrote it. But that bitch was dead, bro. After the second chapter, I said, this bitch is dead.

• 1:25:52Speaker 01

  I think I only, I think I only read one book he ever did because like, because I couldn't, I couldn't read his books without going. Hey dude, whoever writes like this is a demon like. And then he always had his picture on the back and he looked scary like, ah.

• 1:26:13Theo Von?

  Yeah, he looked like he owned a bunch of ravens or something. That dude, yeah, everybody, he had one book then, The Animals, was kept being alive and dead.

• 1:26:22Speaker 01

  Edgar Allan Poe was.

• 1:26:23Theo Von?

  He was a gangster too. He had a lot of women too. Bring up, bring up some of his ladies he had. Edgar Allan Poe's girlfriend. He had a flock at the, and you know, I think he used to live in Virginia. You know that? Edgar Allan Poe, click on a couple of his dimes he had.

• 1:26:46Theo Von?

  Look at these broads right here. Yeah.

• 1:26:51Theo Von?

  Just click on one of them, damn.

• 1:26:54Speaker 01

  Edgar Allan Poe's bitches.

• 1:26:57Theo Von?

  You tell him, oh. Shorty wanna thug.

• 1:27:01Speaker 01

  He was a clear pedophile.

• 1:27:04Speaker 01

  He was a clear pedophile. She looks nine.

• 1:27:09Theo Von?

  How you run?

• 1:27:10Speaker 01

  And it says. She, she, she died when she was 24.

• 1:27:16Theo Von?

  She had tuberculosis, boy, but before that.

• 1:27:18Speaker 01

  That's how you liked him.

• 1:27:19Theo Von?

  Yeah, that's how you liked him, boy.

• 1:27:23Speaker 01

  Oh, shit.

• 1:27:24Theo Von?

  Now, she's ki- oh, she, oh.

• 1:27:25Speaker 01

  No, come on now.

• 1:27:26Theo Von?

  Right there, Frances, baby. That was foster mother, whatever. Damn, bro, why you fucking helping me out? Fire.

• 1:27:36Speaker 01

  These were supposed to be his hoes. This is his family members.

• 1:27:40Theo Von?

  Whatever, we got, yeah. Our research department. Now, what about right there, Virginia Clem, baby? That's a, that's a girlfriend.

• 1:27:48Speaker 01

  Right, and that, that was the...

• 1:27:52Speaker 01

  I'm saying. Even today, that, that's heavy filters.

• 1:28:01Speaker 01

  That was her looking good at any age, right there. That particular pose.

• 1:28:06Theo Von?

  Okay, I admit that's a-

• 1:28:08Speaker 01

  You, you had to be a virgin to show that much neck. She was like no one has ever.

• 1:28:13Theo Von?

  Yeah, pretty good. But what about her, though? Oh, wow, let me see. Sarah Helen Whitman, a professional writer who met Edgar through the literary circles in New York.

• 1:28:24Speaker 01

  Velatio.

• 1:28:25Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:26Speaker 01

  Otherworldly.

• 1:28:29Speaker 01

  That's the original Hawk tour.

• 1:28:31Theo Von?

  Sarah Helen Whitman.

• 1:28:36Speaker 01

  She get those curls going. Oh, you're gonna love it.

• 1:28:40Theo Von?

  Bounce, bounce, bounce.

• 1:28:41Speaker 01

  Milk it, Sarah, milk it.

• 1:28:44Theo Von?

  Right, she'll slurp you back to Saturn right there, man.

• 1:28:48Speaker 01

  And then just a, wait a minute, why does Zuckerberg come? Are they, oh, gee.

• 1:28:54Theo Von?

  I don't know why they brought him up. You think he was like-

• 1:28:55Speaker 01

  You have genius here.

• 1:28:56Theo Von?

  Oh, we have the new hair. Yeah, he has a new hair. What do you think about a lot of these, what do you think about a lot of these social media sites controlling how people communicate? What do you think about that, man? You fear that kind of stuff?

• 1:29:16Speaker 01

  If it exists, it will be controlled and regulated.

• 1:29:23Theo Von?

  That's just a fact.

• 1:29:25Speaker 01

  Whatever it is, that's the game. The game is to how quick can we get this new thing controlled and regulated, right? And we are counting on them to provide this platform that we use to communicate on, right? So, you know.

• 1:29:44Theo Von?

  So it's a trade-off?

• 1:29:46Speaker 01

  Always has been. I'm saying the, if we understood that the internet itself is a government function, then how much privacy would you expect?

• 1:30:04Theo Von?

  Right, right. At that point, we're almost the fools for pretending that we would still have it, privacy.

• 1:30:13Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:13Speaker 01

  Right, I'm saying.

• 1:30:15Theo Von?

  Do you feel like in Hollywood that there are,

• 1:30:20Theo Von?

  you know, I've heard you kind of allude to the fact that there's like kind of darker forces that kind of like,

• 1:30:27Theo Von?

  you know, that present opportunities to people in trade-off, right? In trade for their own, maybe their own peace, maybe their own reality, maybe a sacrifice of their actual direction that they want. Do you think that really happens, that kind of stuff?

• 1:30:58Speaker 01

  I think everything is controlled and regulated.

• 1:31:07Theo Von?

  You think there's ever ways where we can get to the control room and see who's controlling? Or you think that's all?

• 1:31:14Speaker 01

  We're past that. We're past that, but.

• 1:31:28Speaker 01

  We don't protect the whistleblower, right?

• 1:31:37Speaker 01

  We don't honor the scout that would tell us who it is. Matter of fact, when they get him, we're gonna go, ah, I could've told you that was gonna happen. They're telling too much truth.

• 1:31:52Theo Von?

  Do you think Hollywood has a lot of things that they like hold against people, you know? Like, I had a theory that-

• 1:31:58Speaker 01

  A lot of this is human nature.

• 1:32:00Theo Von?

  Right, so it's not even Hollywood, it's just human nature?

• 1:32:03Speaker 01

  It starts as human nature.

• 1:32:05Theo Von?

  Right.

• 1:32:05Speaker 01

  Like, I'm saying this is in this, these things that I'm saying in Hollywood exist in religion, circles, in politics, in the medical profession, and like, yeah.

• 1:32:23Theo Von?

  In any circle of business, really?

• 1:32:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:32:29Theo Von?

  They had a big bust with Puff Daddy, where he got arrested. And then they've had like accusations and stuff. He hasn't gone on trial, I don't think yet, but...

• 1:32:40Theo Von?

  Do you think that they, there's been speculation that they did that because they, the timing of that was they wanted to,

• 1:32:49Theo Von?

  like, use other people that have allegedly been involved in some of his circles to, they wanted to kind of use, like, okay, you could be next unless you help this political plan. Do you think that's at all possible?

• 1:33:07Speaker 01

  That's how all cases are handled.

• 1:33:09Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:33:10Speaker 01

  Right? So what am I saying? I'm saying if it's car theft and we're going to accuse you of having a carjacking ring, right? We're going to begin by bringing in people that we caught

• 1:33:29Speaker 01

  who were robbing cars, who said that you was the boss, they're first in line. And then we're gonna bring in victims, the people whose cars you stole and said, yeah, that was him. That's how they build a case, so, um, none of that should be shocking.

• 1:33:53Theo Von?

  You don't put it past them.

• 1:33:55Speaker 01

  It's part of what an investigation is.

• 1:34:01Theo Von?

  But do you feel like they would say to someone, okay, we're gonna bring you in unless?

• 1:34:06Speaker 01

  Absolutely, that's what they do.

• 1:34:08Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:34:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, even like in the rap world, like all of the rappers that you know that never been to jail and never

• 1:34:19Speaker 01

  never got in any trouble with the law, but they talk as if their life is opposite of that. Like those are federal informants, like, you know?

• 1:34:29Theo Von?

  You think they're really out there?

• 1:34:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:34:33Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:34:34Speaker 01

  That's part of the job is to acquire those.

• 1:34:40Speaker 01

  It's like saying, you know, if you're playing chess, do you have any pawns? You have to, don't you? You can't start without them.

• 1:34:49Theo Von?

  Right.

• 1:34:50Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:34:51Theo Von?

  Wow.

• 1:34:52Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:34:54Theo Von?

  Man, so how do you know who is, that's part of the game, huh? You don't know?

• 1:35:02Speaker 01

  It's part of the game.

• 1:35:06Theo Von?

  Yeah, it kinda makes it exciting too when you think about it.

• 1:35:09Speaker 01

  It can be exciting and depressing.

• 1:35:13Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:35:15Theo Von?

  Did you ever do a rap album?

• 1:35:19Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 1:35:20Theo Von?

  You did?

• 1:35:20Speaker 01

  Several.

• 1:35:21Theo Von?

  I didn't know that, I'm sorry, man, I didn't, I didn't research that.

• 1:35:25Speaker 01

  No problem, I didn't put them out.

• 1:35:27Theo Von?

  Oh.

• 1:35:30Speaker 01

  You asked me, did I do them?

• 1:35:32Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:35:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:35:34Theo Von?

  Did you have some collabs on them with anybody? Did you have somebody help you produce some stuff? Master P, maybe anything like that?

• 1:35:44Speaker 01

  Sure, he would be honored that of all people you name dropped him.

• 1:35:50Theo Von?

  I'm just thinking of somebody from Louisiana.

• 1:35:52Speaker 01

  Right. What a blessing.

• 1:35:57Theo Von?

  When I was in college, he used to, they had, um, it was like master, it was like Silk the Shocker, like that whole cabal was really, really vibing, right?

• 1:36:05Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:36:06Theo Von?

  So they used to have, they would all come to LSU and play at the basketball courts. And they would have these guys who would stand on the side and hold their clothes. And they were dressed like kind of Native Americans, like almost like black Indians, kind of. And someone would have on like little headdresses and stuff. And they would have them all holding their clothes and shoes on the side of the court. It was a vibe, man.

• 1:36:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, all, all through that period of time, that whole No Limit, uh, empire was, um, really, really magnificent to the fan base. Like, they really went to places where people wanted to, um, see them and deliver the show like we weren't used to.

• 1:36:53Speaker 01

  Cause there were so many acts.

• 1:36:55Theo Von?

  Yeah, they had a lot of the whole group.

• 1:36:56Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? Like, there was.

• 1:36:58Theo Von?

  They had.

• 1:36:59Speaker 01

  They all came together and like, like put on a show that was just unbelievable in all venues. It was extraordinary to watch.

• 1:37:11Theo Von?

  Did you ever tour with, um, with a rap? Did you ever, because sometimes you have like musicians and rappers, or musicians and comedians tour together?

• 1:37:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:37:22Theo Von?

  You have?

• 1:37:23Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:37:24Theo Von?

  I just didn't know. Some people like that, some people don't.

• 1:37:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, I, I have Lil Mo on, um, has been on our tour probably for the last three or four years. And, uh, the Lady of Rage as well comes out. Music is a wonderful partner to comedy, you know? And, um, we try to use that. Music and comedy are interspersed in my life. So it's always a part of my set and, um.

• 1:37:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm a huge music fan.

• 1:38:02Theo Von?

  Are you instrumentalist? You play anything?

• 1:38:04Speaker 01

  No, no, no, I play nothing and I cannot sing. Can't sing, can't play anything, which makes me one of the greatest music listeners. You know what I mean? Like, that's what I like, and I, and I like immerse myself, you know, like, like, there's, there's like albums that represent like whole periods of my life, you know what I mean? Like, um, like, that album Counting Crows, um, August and-

• 1:38:38Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, Everything After.

• 1:38:40Speaker 01

  Down up in New Amsterdam.

• 1:38:44Speaker 01

  Like, I know every song, every beat, every word, like, because where I was at the time, and then Pearl Jam's, um-

• 1:38:55Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:38:56Speaker 01

  Ten-

• 1:38:57Theo Von?

  At home drawing pictures of mountain tops, yeah.

• 1:39:02Speaker 01

  With him on top, like, you know what I'm saying? Because I was listening to stuff that it made me feel like, like they're really singing about me.

• 1:39:13Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:39:13Speaker 01

  Like-

• 1:39:14Theo Von?

  How I think or feel some moment?

• 1:39:16Speaker 01

  All of it, like, yeah.

• 1:39:20Theo Von?

  Remember Shy? Remember that group came out? And if I ever fall, remember them? I can't sing either.

• 1:39:27Speaker 01

  You did pretty good.

• 1:39:28Theo Von?

  Thank you, bro. Appreciate it.

• 1:39:30Speaker 01

  They would be proud.

• 1:39:31Theo Von?

  They were good, bro.

• 1:39:33Speaker 01

  They were.

• 1:39:33Theo Von?

  They were good.

• 1:39:34Speaker 01

  But that was a great time for music of all genres, you know what I mean? Like, good music was just good music, yeah, yeah.

• 1:39:44Theo Von?

  Yeah, I remember one of them, I'm trying to think of one of the first, oh, I went to a-

• 1:39:47Speaker 01

  Shy.

• 1:39:48Theo Von?

  Green Day.

• 1:39:49Speaker 01

  You're gonna make a great black guy.

• 1:39:51Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, and they had Tevin Campbell, remember him? Can we talk-

• 1:39:55Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:39:56Theo Von?

  For a minute?

• 1:39:57Speaker 01

  Tevin Campbell.

• 1:39:59Theo Von?

  Girl, I want to know your name. I'm like, fuck it, just go talk to her then.

• 1:40:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, bro, you fucking, no, like, tell the truth. When we saw him and we heard this all, we were like, are you sure you wanna talk to her?

• 1:40:16Theo Von?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:40:19Speaker 01

  You-

• 1:40:20Theo Von?

  No wonder you're so trepidant.

• 1:40:26Speaker 01

  That's true.

• 1:40:29Speaker 01

  That's true, that's true, that's true.

• 1:40:34Speaker 01

  Right. The sequel, the sequel to that song was a surprise. We'll just say like that, man, the sequel was a surprise.

• 1:40:43Speaker 01

  Good time though. Right. That was a good time. It was a good time. When was that?

• 1:40:48Theo Von?

  Uh, that was late 90s, I think. Did you ever get to meet Michael Jackson before?

• 1:40:56Speaker 01

  No, I got to meet Prince.

• 1:40:57Theo Von?

  You did?

• 1:40:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:40:58Theo Von?

  Did you ever get to go bike riding with him or anything like that?

• 1:41:01Speaker 01

  Who's that?

• 1:41:01Theo Von?

  Prince.

• 1:41:05Speaker 01

  I think bike riding may been the only thing we. Yeah, no, no, I don't, he wasn't doing bike riding.

• 1:41:16Speaker 01

  He had had an experience. Let's see, so when I meet him, I'm 12, I guess he's 18, 19.

• 1:41:24Theo Von?

  Oh, you met him when you were 12?

• 1:41:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, I knew him, I knew him my whole, I'm saying from 12 till he, um, uh, left. That was, I knew him the whole time, like, yeah, he was a magnificent, uh, one of a kind individual. Like, I got to, um. He, um.

• 1:41:51Speaker 01

  He lived, um, different lives, like, he wasn't where we are and we're talking about how we need to, you know, reinvent and, and he was like the master at that. You know what I mean? Like, he was only going to be this version of himself for a very short amount of time, until he had mastered it and then he was gonna go to something else and.

• 1:42:21Theo Von?

  He always had that energy, huh?

• 1:42:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, from the, yeah, yeah, he was.

• 1:42:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, but but when I met him, he was already a millionaire. And so I I couldn't initially understand what what kept driving him, you know? Because it just seemed to me like he was never happy. Because every time I would see him, he had achieved like thirty new things and had purchased like a hundred new things. And still yet, he was working like he didn't, you know?

• 1:42:59Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:42:59Speaker 01

  And I probably was just not understanding what work ethic was, you know? But yeah, I learned a lot from that guy. I met Shaq when I was sixteen.

• 1:43:13Theo Von?

  Damn, where at, you think?

• 1:43:15Speaker 01

  I know where, in Orlando, his rookie year.

• 1:43:19Theo Von?

  Yeah, because he played at LSU, man.

• 1:43:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, great guy.

• 1:43:24Speaker 01

  Great guy.

• 1:43:24Theo Von?

  Big Shaq.

• 1:43:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, right.

• 1:43:30Theo Von?

  Dude, if I was that big, I couldn't get my big ass out of bed at that size, man. It'd be so hard, you know, because sometimes it's kind of hard even a regular size.

• 1:43:39Speaker 01

  I don't believe that.

• 1:43:41Theo Von?

  Dude, you know how hard it is to get a big old, look at it right there.

• 1:43:46Theo Von?

  It's so hard to get up when you big.

• 1:43:49Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:43:49Theo Von?

  I watched my aunt get up sometime, like she ain't gonna get up.

• 1:43:55Theo Von?

  You know what I'm talking about? You ever see somebody and you're like, she ain't gonna get up?

• 1:44:00Speaker 01

  That's when.

• 1:44:01Theo Von?

  And they figure it out?

• 1:44:03Speaker 01

  When all of the places were catching on fire, that was my first thought was like, nobody on my six hundred pound life is gonna make it out of none of this. Like, what? Like.

• 1:44:20Theo Von?

  Yeah, that show was over, bro.

• 1:44:22Speaker 01

  Like, there's a whole portion of the population that can't get up.

• 1:44:28Speaker 01

  Like. Everybody's like, evacuate. Somebody just shit in the bed. I did. I did evacuate.

• 1:44:41Theo Von?

  They evacuated, they just looked the other way, that's that's their evacuation?

• 1:44:47Theo Von?

  Just lean away from the warm?

• 1:44:53Speaker 01

  Flip the pillow.

• 1:44:55Theo Von?

  Yeah, yeah. Did you, uh, what did you and Prince do? Did y'all ever go to eat or nothing? Like, what did he like to do? He, cause he's just-

• 1:45:04Speaker 01

  No, so, like,

• 1:45:08Speaker 01

  you know how some people have chefs? Like, he was beyond that. Like, he, he wanted,

• 1:45:19Speaker 01

  he, he wanted chef, a chef to know what he was preparing. Like, I don't know how to explain it, but like,

• 1:45:31Speaker 01

  he wasn't vegan the whole time I knew him, you know? He was just vegan for this portion. And, but before that, he had a whole different thing. But he was, he would have an Italian chef to make Italian when that's what he was having. And he, like, to the extreme.

• 1:45:53Theo Von?

  He was extreme.

• 1:45:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, so, you know, you, you would get the most beautiful meals around this dude. Cause he, he was a foodie, so, you know?

• 1:46:04Theo Von?

  Damn, I'd love to watch him eat a little, eat a little snack or something, little creme brulee or little big scoop of ice cream. I'd love to see that, cause he was kinda smaller, wasn't he?

• 1:46:19Speaker 01

  I'm five, I'm five five, so it never really factored in.

• 1:46:24Theo Von?

  Oh, you're bigger than him, I think.

• 1:46:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, but, but I'm saying, I wasn't gazing at him while he was eating. Yeah, we always had enough women around for-

• 1:46:36Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 1:46:36Speaker 01

  Yeah. I wasn't there in a longing fashion.

• 1:46:44Theo Von?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:46:46Theo Von?

  Yeah, sorry, somehow I just like, uh, watch a small person, they get up against a, like a real hard scoop of ice cream. They fucking can't handle that bitch, you know?

• 1:46:54Speaker 01

  No, no, no. I didn't get it.

• 1:46:58Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:46:59Speaker 01

  Give, rewind that again?

• 1:47:02Speaker 01

  Somehow I missed that and I can't accept it.

• 1:47:04Theo Von?

  No, I, no, I just, sometimes if somebody, you know, I know, like, if I get up, if it's a real cold scoop of ice cream and it's, it's hard to, you know, get with a spoon or something, I just imagine like a smaller guy battling that. Uh, battling that bitch, bro, I just, I can't.

• 1:47:23Speaker 01

  Oh shit.

• 1:47:25Theo Von?

  So that's what I envisioned.

• 1:47:26Speaker 01

  I wanted you to acknowledge how funny that was.

• 1:47:29Theo Von?

  I just wanted to envision in my head Prince. Just got two or three spoons going on that bit, he gonna get in there.

• 1:47:36Speaker 01

  Nah, he'd have whooped your ass in here.

• 1:47:38Theo Von?

  He probably would have, and blessings, man.

• 1:47:40Speaker 01

  I'd have had to pull him off.

• 1:47:43Theo Von?

  Man, he's a purple superhero and he is the king, man. I've, I-

• 1:47:47Speaker 01

  In real life, yeah.

• 1:47:48Theo Von?

  I know, I, I, I, yeah. I'm just joking Prince, if your spirit is here, I'm sure it is somewhere.

• 1:47:53Speaker 01

  It is indeed, yeah, and he had a great sense of humor.

• 1:47:57Theo Von?

  Oh, I saw him stop in, I was in Minneapolis, they used to have this place called, uh...

• 1:48:03Speaker 01

  And he got more pussy than you.

• 1:48:04Theo Von?

  Did he?

• 1:48:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:48:06Theo Von?

  Oh yeah, of course he did, what the fuck am I talking about there? Yeah, it took me half a second to realize that. Uh, yeah, of course he did, bro. Damn, boy. Yeah, well no, they had a place though, that he would go perform sometimes on a certain night, it was in Minneapolis, and a lot of musicians would just show up, and one night he showed up there, man, and it was amazing. It was just random, random people would get together and play, but...

• 1:48:29Speaker 01

  No, he loved that probably more than anything else, like, he loved that more than touring, he loved that more than anything is jam sessions, and he he had places all over the globe, and, um, he was welcomed at, I'm saying, you're talking about a guy that played twenty-six instruments, you feel what I'm saying? Like, we're talking about a guy that like most peo-

• 1:49:03Speaker 01

  he, he-

• 1:49:04Theo Von?

  Yeah. Just magical, huh?

• 1:49:07Speaker 01

  If you could learn from what he did, then you just passed learning, you know what I mean? Like, the shit resonates, regardless of what it is you're trying to do.

• 1:49:20Theo Von?

  Right.

• 1:49:21Speaker 01

  And so, um, yeah, I was blessed to-

• 1:49:24Theo Von?

  Even be around him, huh?

• 1:49:26Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah, just to, uh, be able to witness, um,

• 1:49:32Speaker 01

  a short, um, young-

• 1:49:37Speaker 01

  Black guy navigate the highest echelons of entertainment and still be

• 1:49:49Speaker 01

  holding on to things that he doesn't do and won't do and still feeling like he needs to look out for other musicians and other artists and still

• 1:50:05Speaker 01

  trying not to bring shame on his fans or other black people or music lovers or you know, just a wonderful human, you know? That's what you can learn.

• 1:50:25Theo Von?

  Shit, now I feel bad about making that joke, but I feel okay still. I mean, I feel it's okay. I'm just joking.

• 1:50:34Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:50:37Theo Von?

  But did, um, when you were growing up, did you ever have like a TV, like a TV father kinda, you know, like I had, like, I'm trying to think of like, just trying to think of like influences that you had when you were young. Like I had, like Little House on the Prairie was a show I would watch that they had Michael Landen was on it. And then they had like In the Heat of the Night. I really liked that show.

• 1:50:59Speaker 01

  Now, wait a minute.

• 1:51:01Theo Von?

  I'm trying.

• 1:51:02Speaker 01

  Who was the father figure on In the Heat of the Night? Was the black guy your father figure?

• 1:51:09Theo Von?

  Who, Virgil Tibbs?

• 1:51:10Speaker 01

  Virgil Tibbs?

• 1:51:11Theo Von?

  Yeah, probably. He was good. I will tell you this. I met his wife at a, or not his wife, but.

• 1:51:18Speaker 01

  The lady that played?

• 1:51:19Theo Von?

  Yes, that's her right there. Virgil and Sophia was his wife in the show, I think.

• 1:51:22Speaker 01

  She was way smaller than you thought, right?

• 1:51:25Theo Von?

  She was very beautiful. And I saw her at a breakfast place and I was like, I cannot go back in there and tell her. And I did. And it was, she, I think she kind of appreciated it, but it was still pretty awkward, I think. But she's very beautiful. But yeah, I liked him and Carol O'Connor was in it. But, uh.

• 1:51:45Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:51:46Theo Von?

  That shit was good. I loved that. What else did I like? Trying to think of a show where I had like a TV dad. Did you have like a TV family or someone that you kind of liked?

• 1:51:57Speaker 01

  As a black man.

• 1:52:01Speaker 01

  I had a real father, so I wasn't looking at TV for the images of a real good black father, because I had one.

• 1:52:14Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:52:14Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? So for me, it was a little interesting just to see how other fathers were portrayed, you know?

• 1:52:30Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:52:30Speaker 01

  And I more enjoyed like seeing the dynamics of other families and how things went for them, because that's the only way that I knew, oh, I don't have that type of upbringing at all. Wow, that's, yeah, like, yeah. I didn't, I didn't even know my mother was supposed to love me. Like, I didn't know that was.

• 1:53:00Theo Von?

  Sorry to laugh, man, but yeah.

• 1:53:02Speaker 01

  She's never kissed me in my life. I didn't, I didn't know she was supposed to like me. Like, I'm saying, she made sure I ate, but I had clean clothes, but I'm saying, I didn't.

• 1:53:18Theo Von?

  Yeah, you'd have been shocking if I, oh, my mom was always working. I would be like, Mom, tell me you love me. And she'd be like, I gotta move this box over here. That's what she would be like. I'm like, Mom, how do you feel about me? She's like, oh, we gotta put all these boxes away. She always had something to do, you know? Like, if a feeling came up, my mom just couldn't have it, you know? No, I love you, Mom, I'm just, it's funny. Now it's funny.

• 1:53:45Speaker 01

  Right, but now you can.

• 1:53:48Theo Von?

  Yeah, it was ridiculous, though. I was like, Mom, how do you feel about me? She's like, we gotta get this car to start. I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about?

• 1:53:57Speaker 01

  There's a vacuum.

• 1:54:03Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:54:05Theo Von?

  Yeah, that was it. That's what I think. That's what I always was looking for, for me.

• 1:54:10Speaker 01

  But these are the things that guarantee success. That's what I'm telling you.

• 1:54:14Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:54:14Speaker 01

  It's part of what's on that list that, you know, you've got certain things

• 1:54:23Speaker 01

  against you. You're gonna be successful.

• 1:54:27Theo Von?

  Right.

• 1:54:27Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah, you're gonna be in a position where you can rectify things.

• 1:54:37Speaker 01

  You know that

• 1:54:41Speaker 01

  you're way more appreciative of love because of that. You're in a position where you can still be loved, you know, by the black lady at the airport.

• 1:54:55Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:54:56Speaker 01

  Twenty twenty five.

• 1:54:58Theo Von?

  My little layover lady.

• 1:55:01Theo Von?

  That's what I'm calling my little layover. Um, I've seen you. This is something that I thought. There's only two things that I think that I've seen and I'm not sure. One of them was that Santa Claus, when I was a kid, that they brought us outside and they had a real sleigh go by in the air. It was an airplane that they disguised as a sleigh in our town.

• 1:55:18Speaker 01

  Mm hmm.

• 1:55:19Theo Von?

  The second one is, I thought I saw you riding bikes down Sunset Boulevard.

• 1:55:24Speaker 01

  Right. So now the funniest part of all of that.

• 1:55:27Theo Von?

  True story.

• 1:55:29Speaker 01

  It's because all of your stories are true, right? But the whole thing is

• 1:55:37Speaker 01

  when you're telling this story, we ride by on these bikes with lights on them.

• 1:55:42Theo Von?

  Yeah, like from the future.

• 1:55:44Speaker 01

  Circus members. But really, really, this is a million and a half dollars worth of Can-Am spiders.

• 1:55:54Speaker 01

  Eight of them. Two hundred thousand apiece. Me and Suge going down Sunset.

• 1:56:03Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah, I didn't see those, man. I'm sorry. I saw some bitches, somebody covered them bitches.

• 1:56:11Speaker 01

  Cat Williams came by and with a shuttling pony. He had neon lights on the hubs.

• 1:56:17Theo Von?

  Somebody spray painted silly string on the back.

• 1:56:21Speaker 01

  With a violin. Start playing it.

• 1:56:29Theo Von?

  Yeah, I swear to God, I'm standing on the porch, I look over there.

• 1:56:32Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:56:33Theo Von?

  And you had done one of those things where you stand up, but keep, you know what I'm saying, it's just, you know, when you're riding down the street.

• 1:56:38Speaker 01

  I'm five five, so I do that better than most.

• 1:56:43Theo Von?

  And I said, damn, there he goes, bruh.

• 1:56:46Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:56:47Theo Von?

  And by the time I got anybody's attention, nobody believed me, so that's why I think it had a lot of that same, like, when you saw Santa, you know, type of energy.

• 1:56:54Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:56:54Theo Von?

  Um.

• 1:56:55Speaker 01

  Well, I understand, I didn't take away from the myth, I just clarified.

• 1:56:58Theo Von?

  Yeah. No, good, because I thought I was crazy for thinking that.

• 1:57:03Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:57:04Theo Von?

  Um, what do you see happening in 2025, Kat? This is where we get to where like,

• 1:57:12Theo Von?

  what do you feel like, what do you feel like are things we can look forward to, things we can stay conscious of?

• 1:57:20Theo Von?

  Can I bum another cigarette by chance, man? You got enough on you?

• 1:57:22Speaker 01

  Absolutely, let's do it. Yeah, so, um.

• 1:57:26Theo Von?

  Let me get that bitch, get my lungs up.

• 1:57:28Speaker 01

  We're already in 2025, aren't we?

• 1:57:31Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:57:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, so.

• 1:57:33Theo Von?

  You right already.

• 1:57:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, see there? So the whole thing is, we're not, um,

• 1:57:41Speaker 01

  this, this, this thing does not happen in yearly cycles, like, it's not a every 12 months thing. It's not how it works, so.

• 1:57:54Speaker 01

  The age of truth is not one year, it's, it's the beginning of people having more of a thirst for what is true than an appetite for lies.

• 1:58:12Speaker 01

  So if you sell lies, it's a harder road for you. If you have truths to tell, people are hungry for that, and they'll pay you handsomely to hear the truth. Wasn't always that way, it's that way right now, in real time, whatever that means to you. Um, that's the battle that's going on, is people who profit from the manipulation of others by getting you to believe something that's not the case, and that's how they make their living. And it is now a difficult time for those entities.

• 1:58:58Theo Von?

  Do you think that there is actual cloning going on?

• 1:59:02Speaker 01

  We have, we know that there's actual cloning going on.

• 1:59:08Speaker 01

  The question I believe you're asking is human cloning.

• 1:59:11Theo Von?

  Oh, yes, sir.

• 1:59:12Speaker 01

  But let's start with the real question. The real question is, is cloning going on?

• 1:59:18Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, it is.

• 1:59:21Theo Von?

  I knew it.

• 1:59:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, I'm saying, let's just say animal cloning.

• 1:59:26Theo Von?

  Oh, yes.

• 1:59:27Speaker 01

  Let's start there. That, that's not a myth or...

• 1:59:31Theo Von?

  No, that's been...

• 1:59:32Speaker 01

  That's not a conspiracy theory that we are at the point where we have no problem cloning animals. If you lose a pet, you can send away to these companies and they will...

• 1:59:46Theo Von?

  They'll fucking remix that bitch and send it back.

• 1:59:48Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:59:49Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:50Speaker 01

  At as close a proximity as you can imagine.

• 1:59:53Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:53Speaker 01

  Right? That we know is possible. Okay, so now...

• 1:59:59Theo Von?

  Through Viagen Pets, right there.

• 2:00:01Speaker 01

  So, that's in the animal world. So now in the human world, we know that there are multiple surgeries that we know we can replace this with that. All the way up to, um, what's our last achievement? Is it heart?

• 2:00:27Speaker 01

  The guy passed away with a pig heart.

• 2:00:31Speaker 01

  But it worked for, I'm saying...

• 2:00:34Theo Von?

  Let me see that. Bring up that pig-hearted guy.

• 2:00:38Theo Von?

  Right there.

• 2:00:39Speaker 01

  Yeah. Two, two people have received a...

• 2:00:43Theo Von?

  Genetically modified pig heart transplant. David Bennett and Lawrence Faousset. Both were performed in Maryland.

• 2:00:55Speaker 01

  So, um, there, there's not.

• 2:01:01Theo Von?

  The evidence is there.

• 2:01:03Speaker 01

  Very much left on what it would take as far as abilities go, um, so.

• 2:01:11Theo Von?

  Do you think there's any artists now that you think are not the same artists that we thought they were?

• 2:01:19Speaker 01

  If we're only speaking of biology, I've heard that, um,

• 2:01:27Speaker 01

  a man's G-spot is in his anal passage, which means I'm gonna go my whole life without ever experiencing it.

• 2:01:39Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:01:41Speaker 01

  By the same token,

• 2:01:46Speaker 01

  everybody is a reflection of what they gotta go through to get to where they at, right? And I just know that

• 2:01:58Speaker 01

  the people that have been in positions where they decided to do some stuff that they said they weren't gonna do, they don't be the same on the other side.

• 2:02:11Speaker 01

  Nothing they can do can make them seem like what you remember them as, um.

• 2:02:20Theo Von?

  Have you ever-

• 2:02:21Speaker 01

  I call it spiritual because I don't know what else to call it, but, yeah.

• 2:02:25Theo Von?

  Have you ever faced, uh,

• 2:02:30Theo Von?

  that in your own life where they, where people try to come at you for offers like that? Do you think that, like, stars and get offered that kind of thing? Like to compromise themselves sexually for entertainment?

• 2:02:46Speaker 01

  Uh, again, the things that we are discussing exist in each of the fields.

• 2:02:55Theo Von?

  Right, any field.

• 2:02:56Speaker 01

  Right, right. Not entertainment exclusively, politics, religion, science, everywhere, right? Some of this is human nature, right?

• 2:03:12Speaker 01

  Because we listen and we don't judge.

• 2:03:21Theo Von?

  Were there things that you didn't take in your career that you feel like were?

• 2:03:26Theo Von?

  Like, uh, like are there things to look out for, do you feel like?

• 2:03:30Speaker 01

  Like there, there wasn't for me because I knew I wasn't gonna take it, but I did wanna get offered.

• 2:03:36Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:03:36Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? And most of the stuff I wouldn't have believed until I, I had to get to a certain level to get to see the proof. You know what I mean? So, um, I was as shocked as anybody about

• 2:03:52Speaker 01

  how powerful Harvey Weinstein was at the time that I was meeting with him. And how I had, how he

• 2:04:06Speaker 01

  could not be told no.

• 2:04:09Speaker 01

  That he get whatever he want. You follow what I'm saying?

• 2:04:13Theo Von?

  They'll, they'll figure out some way.

• 2:04:14Speaker 01

  Right, so I thought that didn't apply to me cuz I don't care about nothing, but

• 2:04:22Speaker 01

  business and good business, right? And then he offered me two actresses like they was playing cards. And I was like, what?

• 2:04:32Theo Von?

  Like he just jumped to the hell out of here.

• 2:04:34Speaker 01

  He was like, I know you.

• 2:04:37Theo Von?

  Damn.

• 2:04:38Speaker 01

  Right, like what?

• 2:04:41Theo Von?

  Some aces.

• 2:04:44Speaker 01

  No, my personal aces.

• 2:04:47Theo Von?

  Yeah, did you think about it?

• 2:04:50Speaker 01

  Look, I'm not. In these scary situations, I don't even leave it up to me. Like I'm gonna do what the superhero would do in this part of the movie regardless. And deal with what happens after, yeah. Just cuz it's a story and I know it's a story.

• 2:05:14Theo Von?

  Right.

• 2:05:14Speaker 01

  It's my story. You know what I mean? So I can't.

• 2:05:17Theo Von?

  That's a good way to think about things in general.

• 2:05:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:05:21Theo Von?

  What would the superhero do right now?

• 2:05:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, because I'm saying, I, I read about Jesus getting to the mountaintop and the devil saying you can have all of this and him.

• 2:05:36Speaker 01

  Say you don't have anything to offer me like you know what I mean? So that's what I got to look up to so. I'm gonna follow suit in the best version I can regardless of.

• 2:05:50Speaker 01

  Anything else.

• 2:05:54Theo Von?

  Do you have a comedian that passed away that you really like? That you miss a lot?

• 2:06:00Theo Von?

  I mean, I know there's been a lot of them.

• 2:06:04Theo Von?

  But do you have like a real-

• 2:06:05Speaker 01

  I'm just gonna say I miss so many like.

• 2:06:07Theo Von?

  Did you have like a brother in comedy like?

• 2:06:10Speaker 01

  I miss so many I I.

• 2:06:13Theo Von?

  Like what was Bernie Mac like was he a super guy?

• 2:06:17Theo Von?

  Cause I've never seen anybody like him.

• 2:06:21Speaker 01

  That's a great place to start. No, that you never saw anybody like him just because there wasn't anybody like him.

• 2:06:28Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:06:28Speaker 01

  You know what I mean like um.

• 2:06:32Speaker 01

  The things people pretend to do and talk themselves up to be and uh. He was that.

• 2:06:42Speaker 01

  Already um.

• 2:06:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, I um.

• 2:06:51Speaker 01

  I went down to his show when he was taping. And they were saying he wasn't feeling good. And I left there feeling like. They're they're murdering this dude like he. He had a lung problem, right? And the doctors told him that he just had to take time away from the show. And he could come back when he was okay, right? And his contract wouldn't let him.

• 2:07:22Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:07:23Speaker 01

  And they made him work through like.

• 2:07:28Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, but I miss, I miss all of the comedy angels that I came in contact with from, um, from Charlie Murphy to, um,

• 2:07:43Speaker 01

  Heavy D. I miss Heavy D, uh, John Witherspoon.

• 2:07:48Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:07:49Speaker 01

  You know, like, we lost some really great comics. I miss Ronaldo Ray. I miss,

• 2:07:58Speaker 01

  ah, yeah, it's been a lot.

• 2:08:00Theo Von?

  Bring up a picture of Ronaldo Ray. I'm just not familiar with him, just so I can see what he looks like.

• 2:08:06Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:08:09Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:08:10Theo Von?

  Was, didn't he, didn't he play in The Cosby Show? Was he the grandfather?

• 2:08:14Speaker 01

  He was a brilliant, brilliant, um, individual. Like, he, he had

• 2:08:24Speaker 01

  multiple master's degrees and was an art collector and a real legendary guy.

• 2:08:34Theo Von?

  Ronaldo.

• 2:08:35Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm, yeah. What other?

• 2:08:40Theo Von?

  What about Bill Cosby? Did you ever get to meet him or not? Before he had all the problems?

• 2:08:51Speaker 01

  Is being a rapist one of the problems?

• 2:08:53Theo Von?

  Oh, I got it, sorry.

• 2:08:57Speaker 01

  You said it like, before he got scurvy?

• 2:09:09Theo Von?

  Sorry, bro. That was, yeah, that wasn't, that was, uh, yeah, I did, um, but yeah, what was he like before that?

• 2:09:20Speaker 01

  Right, right. I don't know. I don't know. He...

• 2:09:28Speaker 01

  He comedically, like, he has some works comedically that you could put up there in the pantheon of joke telling.

• 2:09:39Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah. He had so many albums when I was a kid that like our parents would play in the car, stuff like that.

• 2:09:43Speaker 01

  Right, and he spent a good portion of his televised career really making black men and black families look really good in a time when that was not a popular thing to do. None of that supersedes rapist.

• 2:10:08Theo Von?

  No.

• 2:10:09Speaker 01

  But, yeah, I was, I was glad to not be a fan of his just because, you know. We liked Richard Pryor, and you had to kind of like, which way are you, are you Richard Pryor, Redd Foxx, or are you Bill Cosby?

• 2:10:28Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:10:30Theo Von?

  Yeah. Yeah, that's definitely different then.

• 2:10:36Theo Von?

  What else is going on?

• 2:10:37Speaker 01

  Please don't have an R. Kelly question next.

• 2:10:39Theo Von?

  I do not have an R. Kelly question, no.

• 2:10:43Theo Von?

  No, I don't, did you ever, did you get to go to Bernie Mac's funeral? Did he have a big funeral?

• 2:10:52Speaker 01

  Steve Harvey was at his funeral, so I wouldn't have been there anyway.

• 2:10:58Theo Von?

  I didn't know that.

• 2:11:08Theo Von?

  What else?

• 2:11:08Speaker 01

  I'll be able to tell you when you're, when you're black.

• 2:11:11Theo Von?

  Okay.

• 2:11:14Theo Von?

  I feel like I'm not doing that good right now on it.

• 2:11:16Speaker 01

  You're doing great.

• 2:11:17Theo Von?

  Okay.

• 2:11:17Speaker 01

  What do you mean?

• 2:11:18Theo Von?

  Thanks, man.

• 2:11:21Theo Von?

  Did you get, was it scary for you to be a parent whenever you decided you wanted to be a parent?

• 2:11:27Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's, yeah, that's one of those things where

• 2:11:35Speaker 01

  it's only looking back that you realize, oh, I was not in any way qualified for that job. Like, like, you know, but you try so hard, you know, and it means everything, but.

• 2:11:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's it's

• 2:11:58Speaker 01

  it's exciting and scary. Like, you can't

• 2:12:05Speaker 01

  so you you you don't have a you don't have any kids?

• 2:12:09Theo Von?

  No, I want to get I would like to have some children, but I just

• 2:12:12Speaker 01

  Well, if you have one child, you're not gonna

• 2:12:19Speaker 01

  you're not gonna have the drug issue to deal with ever again.

• 2:12:25Theo Von?

  Really?

• 2:12:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, because it's going to

• 2:12:30Speaker 01

  you you're not you can't do them both.

• 2:12:33Theo Von?

  Right.

• 2:12:36Speaker 01

  You can't do them both.

• 2:12:38Theo Von?

  Yeah. And if yeah, and if you

• 2:12:41Speaker 01

  As soon as you have and it doesn't doesn't matter how you get this child.

• 2:12:46Theo Von?

  Okay.

• 2:12:46Speaker 01

  The second you become a father and this life is dependent upon you, like, you're gonna devote everything to that and you're gonna have to. You're gonna have to because only somebody with your experiences will be able to deal with not being able to sleep for like two months. You know what I mean? Just

• 2:13:15Speaker 01

  on this baby's schedule that has no schedule except.

• 2:13:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's crazy. Life changing doesn't even say the half of it. But, you know, you have pets? See, this is the thing. Yeah. Right.

• 2:13:35Theo Von?

  I'm gonna get started soon.

• 2:13:37Speaker 01

  This is what's keeping you able to be in this world is because you've not given yourself a life responsibility. You see what I'm saying?

• 2:13:46Theo Von?

  I think that's why I became a comedian, because I didn't want any responsibilities, really.

• 2:13:50Speaker 01

  Right, right.

• 2:13:51Theo Von?

  In a lot of ways. But I think there's a big part of me that starts to feel like, yeah, I'm missing out if I don't if I'm missing out, but I just want to know, I want to have every experience I can, you know?

• 2:14:01Speaker 01

  Right, right. And you can, yeah. And this is the vehicle for that. You know what I mean? That's What a coincidence that all your life will line up for you to want to do that. And, and then to meet a girl at the airport that already loves to fly and travel.

• 2:14:23Theo Von?

  And. And make sure I don't have any illegal substances on me too at the same time.

• 2:14:29Speaker 01

  Just because you're not gonna need them.

• 2:14:32Theo Von?

  Um, are you, are you a pet owner? You a big pet owner, man? I've heard that you got some animals over there.

• 2:14:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, I love the animals.

• 2:14:40Theo Von?

  I've heard you got a couple of horses, things like that.

• 2:14:42Speaker 01

  They're great, yeah. Ducks, like I got, I got.

• 2:14:46Theo Von?

  How many ducks do you have, Kat?

• 2:14:50Speaker 01

  Between nineteen and twenty-one.

• 2:14:54Speaker 01

  I just say that because a couple were there when I first got the place and they never left. Right? So they're there, but everybody else we raise from eggs, you know, that you go down to. What's the name of that place? Tractor Supply?

• 2:15:11Theo Von?

  Oh, Tractor Supply.

• 2:15:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, you go to Tractor Supply.

• 2:15:15Theo Von?

  Oh, and the, and the feed and seed shop?

• 2:15:17Speaker 01

  You do the, right, you do the incubators. Yeah, so it's beautiful because they're all black.

• 2:15:23Theo Von?

  Oh, really?

• 2:15:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 2:15:25Theo Von?

  We need more of that. We need everybody.

• 2:15:28Speaker 01

  Diversity in the duck world.

• 2:15:30Theo Von?

  Oh, hell yeah, dog. I'm sick of seeing these fucking swans, bruh. You know what I'm saying? These rich ass, long neck motherfuckers, bruh.

• 2:15:39Speaker 01

  No, we have geese too.

• 2:15:41Theo Von?

  But I'm just saying, we need some fucking bangers in there, dog. You know, we need some dark ducks in this bitch.

• 2:15:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 2:15:48Theo Von?

  Or some, um, bring up a couple of black ducks, man. I would love to see those right now. Because I'm used to seeing mallards, I've seen for sure, but I've never seen some really good darker ducks. Oh, that's a beautiful one right there.

• 2:16:01Speaker 01

  None of these are black ducks. Oh, sorry.

• 2:16:03Theo Von?

  We'll get one, but no, get one of them.

• 2:16:05Speaker 01

  There we go. That western black.

• 2:16:08Theo Von?

  That western black.

• 2:16:10Speaker 01

  That's an all-black duck.

• 2:16:11Theo Von?

  Oh, hell, yeah.

• 2:16:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, but mine are.

• 2:16:15Theo Von?

  Oh, that's fucking mall, mallard luther king right there, bro. That thing dark as hell, dude.

• 2:16:24Theo Von?

  Sorry, bro.

• 2:16:26Speaker 01

  You're gonna make a great black guy, Mallard Luther, that, that could be his name.

• 2:16:31Theo Von?

  And that is actually a beautiful name for a duck.

• 2:16:34Speaker 01

  For that duck specifically.

• 2:16:36Theo Von?

  It is.

• 2:16:36Speaker 01

  Mallard Luther.

• 2:16:38Theo Von?

  The King.

• 2:16:40Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 2:16:41Theo Von?

  Do you think, oh, some people think that, um, guys like Martin Luther King were compromised by the CIA. Do you ever believe stuff like that?

• 2:16:52Speaker 01

  Well, this kind of goes back to.

• 2:16:55Theo Von?

  Like, there's a lot of conspiracy theory stuff about that, you know?

• 2:17:00Speaker 01

  Somebody says it's a conspiracy, but that doesn't make it the case. In both of these cases that we've had these conversations, we are talking about the FBI and the CIA. So, what do you think they do?

• 2:17:18Speaker 01

  So, maybe we're unclear about what we think these agencies do. So, now the question becomes, hey, do you think they be doing their job? I do. I do think they be doing their job. You mean all through history? Yes. Yes, I think they keep on doing their job. You think they get everybody? I think they get everybody.

• 2:17:47Speaker 01

  So, again, not conspiracy theory at all. I'm saying, the only way that there could be a FBI file for us to be able to get thirty years after his death is if there's a FBI file, correct?

• 2:18:05Theo Von?

  Right, right, right.

• 2:18:07Speaker 01

  Right.

• 2:18:08Theo Von?

  Damn, bro. Nobody could trust anybody.

• 2:18:13Theo Von?

  That's a scary part to me sometimes.

• 2:18:17Speaker 01

  The Bible said, "Do not put your trust in men."

• 2:18:24Speaker 01

  Pretty specific. Why? Because everybody can be compromised except you.

• 2:18:31Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:18:34Speaker 01

  If you don't believe in God, then it's pretty messed up because now you only got you to believe in. But if you got you and God, you can believe in both of those. You can, you can, you can have peace then.

• 2:18:48Theo Von?

  Do you, have you had times in your life where you struggled having God in your life? Or what's that been like for you?

• 2:18:54Speaker 01

  No.

• 2:18:57Theo Von?

  Do you have a practice that you use kind of to like, um, like one of my goals this year is to have more God in my life, right? So for me, I'm just using like more times where I stop and pray, like even sometimes moments of my head will pop in like, you should hit your knees right now and pray. And sometimes I just don't do those. I just go and keep doing it about my day. But now when those hit me, I'm trying to just make sure I do that, you know, just like, because it's like an intuition that I have, you know, just because I want to have a stronger practice.

• 2:19:23Speaker 01

  And understand it's, it's, the reason that

• 2:19:30Speaker 01

  it's special is because

• 2:19:34Speaker 01

  only you're gonna know

• 2:19:37Speaker 01

  that it's working, right? There's gonna be no evidence other than the evidence, but you're gonna know that.

• 2:19:50Speaker 01

  Like I,

• 2:19:52Speaker 01

  I talk to God five and six times a day. He has an accurate account of how I'm feeling about everything, how I think things are going, what I feel like I'm doing good at, what I feel like I need help with. These are our conversations, so, um.

• 2:20:16Speaker 01

  I don't wonder why stuff gets moved out of my way. Because I asked for things to be moved out of my way. Like, you asked earlier, like, aren't you scared? Like, I'm not allowed to be scared because I'm not counting on me. Like, um, you can't fuck me up because you're not allowed to fuck me up. And I've been in enough situations to know that. He ain't let me down yet. Like, every time I needed his safety, it was there.

• 2:20:57Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:20:57Speaker 01

  And will be. And the more times you communicate, the better the relationship is. And then you'll find that that works with the black girl from the airport, too. Like, communication is key.

• 2:21:15Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:21:22Theo Von?

  Oh, Lord, man.

• 2:21:25Theo Von?

  Literally, huh?

• 2:21:29Speaker 01

  He perfect when you don't even try. Bam.

• 2:21:35Theo Von?

  I've heard you say that you feel like we're about to enter like a golden era.

• 2:21:42Theo Von?

  What do you mean kind of by that? Like, what are... Or what feelings do you have about that?

• 2:21:50Theo Von?

  And what can we look forward to?

• 2:22:00Speaker 01

  I was just trying to be super positive at the time. I wasn't trying to be actually accurate with the question.

• 2:22:10Theo Von?

  Okay.

• 2:22:10Speaker 01

  The question was asked, I think, almost on New Year's or something like that, or Christmas, something like that. It was pretty close to the top of the year. So I didn't want to say anything that would make anybody uncomfortable or awkward. Um, but...

• 2:22:35Speaker 01

  The Bible has a book called Revelations, right? And it gives you this little metaphorical rundown of how things should go.

• 2:22:51Theo Von?

  Bring it up real quick, Revelations. We can get a look at it.

• 2:23:03Speaker 01

  There we go.

• 2:23:08Theo Von?

  Book of Revelation or Book of the Apocalypse, the final book of the New Testament?

• 2:23:18Speaker 01

  Correct. So now,

• 2:23:22Speaker 01

  it talks about the things that will happen in what's called the last days, right?

• 2:23:32Speaker 01

  Before the second coming of Jesus, right? Because my whole life, I was just trying to figure out like,

• 2:23:41Speaker 01

  whatever it would take for Jesus to come back, why aren't all of the people around the world that love Jesus, why aren't they making sure that happens?

• 2:23:53Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:23:55Speaker 01

  So he would come back?

• 2:23:56Theo Von?

  Yeah. Yeah, like Santa, they leave milk and cookies. I don't say you think we would fucking leave out a couple of freaking-

• 2:24:04Speaker 01

  We're willing to go buy the presents ourselves and say you delivered them.

• 2:24:09Theo Von?

  Put some sacred snacks out for him or something.

• 2:24:12Speaker 01

  Right. So, you know, it just tells a story of the little key things that will happen that you can look forward to before things get there, right? And so it talks about things like, um, all of the nations will have to come together and-

• 2:24:39Speaker 01

  Make a group called the United Nations, you know? And this was written way back then, and we have a United Nations now.

• 2:24:49Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:24:49Speaker 01

  And it talks about there being wars and reports of wars on in multiple places. And it gives us, gives us a little guideline just to, you know, what may be happening in the future.

• 2:25:07Theo Von?

  Like whenever Jesus comes back,

• 2:25:11Theo Von?

  where do you think it'll be at?

• 2:25:23Speaker 01

  Well, the Bible is generally pretty specific about places generally. So, um, like it talks about Armageddon, right? And there's this actual valley of Armageddon. I'm gonna mispronounce it, but Armageddon. But the valley of Armageddon that's supposed to take place, there's this valley that is named after, which really exists. But wherever it is, he's gonna bring it up. But there's probably a war there now.

• 2:26:07Theo Von?

  Right.

• 2:26:07Speaker 01

  Right, so.

• 2:26:10Theo Von?

  Ah, here we are. The valley of Megiddo, also known as Jezreel Valley, is a large fertile plain in northern Israel. It's known for its historical, theological, and geographical significance. Oh, wow. And there's a lot of war going on right there, right now.

• 2:26:25Speaker 01

  Correct.

• 2:26:27Theo Von?

  So.

• 2:26:28Speaker 01

  So.

• 2:26:29Theo Von?

  TBD, huh?

• 2:26:32Theo Von?

  What are some of the other animals that you have there? I have heard that you have horses over there. Is that a true, is that true, Cat, that you have some horses over there?

• 2:26:42Speaker 01

  The donkeys are the stars over there. But yeah, we got a lot of, yeah, we have cows, mini cows. Those are the best kind. Mini cows and

• 2:26:55Theo Von?

  How big are they?

• 2:26:56Speaker 01

  Pot belly pigs. Uh, probably about to right there.

• 2:26:58Theo Von?

  A mini cow?

• 2:26:59Speaker 01

  Yeah, but

• 2:27:00Theo Von?

  Bring up a mini cow real quick. I want to see one of them. They're beautiful too. I have, my sister has a picture, picture of a couple of them at her house. Beautiful.

• 2:27:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, if we can find a white one, that'll be like Cash if you

• 2:27:14Theo Von?

  That's your name, Cash?

• 2:27:15Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 2:27:16Theo Von?

  Oh, that's cool. Wow. And can, are those milkable?

• 2:27:21Speaker 01

  Uh, he's a boy, so I don't

• 2:27:22Theo Von?

  Oh damn, well, yeah. Not it.

• 2:27:26Speaker 01

  Right.

• 2:27:27Theo Von?

  Oh, look at that.

• 2:27:29Speaker 01

  So, you know, the, the blessing, he doesn't, he has no idea he's mini.

• 2:27:35Theo Von?

  Oh, I see.

• 2:27:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, ours is bigger than that, but um, yeah.

• 2:27:40Theo Von?

  Beautiful little one right there.

• 2:27:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, they're uh, really fun.

• 2:27:46Theo Von?

  And do you name, so that one's named Cash? And what other name do you have for these animals?

• 2:27:49Speaker 01

  Well, all the animals, all, all the animals have, have names, um, except

• 2:28:00Speaker 01

  except animals that might be delicious, like like I, goat is like my favorite meat, I think. And so we have quite a few, you know.

• 2:28:16Theo Von?

  And are you eating goat?

• 2:28:17Speaker 01

  Not Billy, he's the king of all the goats. Right, right, but

• 2:28:22Theo Von?

  But you having a little bit of goat? How, how much goat are you having monthly, you think?

• 2:28:29Speaker 01

  Weekly.

• 2:28:29Theo Von?

  Oh, okay. Yeah, okay. So Cat got him a little bit of money if he having a weekly goat meal, you know that, boy?

• 2:28:38Speaker 01

  I'm a cannibal, you know?

• 2:28:39Theo Von?

  Yes, sir, yes, sir.

• 2:28:40Speaker 01

  Goat eat goat.

• 2:28:41Theo Von?

  Hey, man, goats eat goat.

• 2:28:43Speaker 01

  Right.

• 2:28:43Theo Von?

  I love that. Um.

• 2:28:48Speaker 01

  He's making a little money.

• 2:28:54Theo Von?

  I think sometimes I was just so, I was so nervous about who you are because you seem like such a like, you almost seem like something that came down off of Mount Rushmore to spend time with us today. So I think that's like the mystique about you. So I think sometimes I don't know when it's like, okay to joke around and stuff, you know? So you just try and figure it out as you go, you know?

• 2:29:13Speaker 01

  I, I hope that that is not correct and you're just saying that because it is always okay to joke around me.

• 2:29:21Theo Von?

  No, I appreciate that. I definitely feel that for sure, more than other interviews.

• 2:29:30Theo Von?

  I'm trying to think of what else I want to ask you about.

• 2:29:34Theo Von?

  This is the best picture I ever got of it.

• 2:29:38Theo Von?

  Someone sent this and they said, this is,

• 2:29:42Theo Von?

  Cat Williams talking to Cam Newton, somebody said.

• 2:29:48Speaker 01

  Right. And that's what I'm thinking, man. Yeah, because here's the thing. Here's the thing.

• 2:29:58Speaker 01

  Everything, yeah, we know that stupid picture of me. Thanks. Appreciate it. Um, yeah.

• 2:30:03Theo Von?

  Oh, I didn't even see that. Can we take that down? That's unbelievable.

• 2:30:06Speaker 01

  Very racist. You see how I became racist to me?

• 2:30:10Speaker 01

  No, but here's the facts. The facts are, you know, everything we know about history, we know, because of artifacts, things that were left behind, you know what I mean? And so to be,

• 2:30:27Speaker 01

  heavily into the culture in a way that is represented is,

• 2:30:35Theo Von?

  Pretty cool.

• 2:30:35Speaker 01

  It's a pretty big deal, you know?

• 2:30:37Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:30:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:30:39Theo Von?

  We should make one next year if we made one and we did make some, made a charity for it or something. That could be cool.

• 2:30:47Speaker 01

  Right, but we would have to do you one too. So like there would have to be a Theo Von as well.

• 2:30:55Theo Von?

  I mean, I would be happy to do that. Yours is really the yours is the one they're already using without your permission.

• 2:31:02Speaker 01

  That's what I'm saying. They are already doing mine.

• 2:31:04Theo Von?

  Yeah, that's true.

• 2:31:07Theo Von?

  But maybe we'll try to find one. That'd be kind of a neat. Maybe we could do something where we raise some money for something.

• 2:31:11Speaker 01

  I would love it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yeah.

• 2:31:14Theo Von?

  Okay.

• 2:31:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm all about that.

• 2:31:17Theo Von?

  That's cool.

• 2:31:17Speaker 01

  We should do it for

• 2:31:21Speaker 01

  yeah, we should do it for um

• 2:31:26Speaker 01

  autism. We should do it for people on the spectrum.

• 2:31:29Theo Von?

  Okay.

• 2:31:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:31:30Theo Von?

  And do they have, and everybody has autism. They have all types of people with autism, yeah?

• 2:31:35Speaker 01

  Right.

• 2:31:36Theo Von?

  Yeah, I would love to do that. That's a cool idea. And do you, um, my last question for you, Cat, do you know any Native Americans? You ever met any over the years? What's that been like?

• 2:31:45Speaker 01

  Really cool.

• 2:31:47Speaker 01

  Right. Like way more

• 2:31:53Speaker 01

  I don't know, I'm trying to figure out how to say it, but like

• 2:31:56Theo Von?

  Cause I've just heard, these are, some of these are just things that I've heard.

• 2:31:59Speaker 01

  When you

• 2:32:02Speaker 01

  I I've met this tribe that several times I've met several tribes, but the whole thing is

• 2:32:11Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:32:12Speaker 01

  You get this thing around them that you understand

• 2:32:20Speaker 01

  that they've been standing here. You know what I mean? Like

• 2:32:24Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:32:25Speaker 01

  There's a Yeah, you, you, you understand how difficult it is to carry legacies and stories, even though your people have been getting destroyed and then when it's all at as bad as it could possibly be and everything is destroyed of your whole legacy, then they give you unlimited money and have casinos. It's um, it's a

• 2:32:57Speaker 01

  A mind blowing thing to watch a people, a group of people still carry their legacy along. And that's what you get. And they know so much about so much, like, you know what I mean?

• 2:33:13Theo Von?

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:33:14Speaker 01

  Like, and I'm an outdoor guy, like, and they know everything about everything. Like fishing with them is like a whole different experience.

• 2:33:25Theo Von?

  They're whistling them bitches in the boat.

• 2:33:27Speaker 01

  They don't make no mistakes. Like, that whole part where you don't catch fish, they don't know shit about that.

• 2:33:36Theo Von?

  Yeah, they catch them bitches and half of them cooked. They catch them bitches, they do it right.

• 2:33:42Speaker 01

  I want you to come out of the water boneless.

• 2:33:50Speaker 01

  Filets.

• 2:33:53Theo Von?

  Have with with outdoor stuff, have you ever done any like camping or anything like that?

• 2:33:59Theo Von?

  You've done any long camps? Have, did you ever do like a plant medicine retreat or anything like that?

• 2:34:04Speaker 01

  No, but having a hundred acre ranch, you start getting into trying to make sure you, because first you have to figure out what you already have there, you know what I mean? Because I'm kind of, aren't you like close to Nashville?

• 2:34:21Theo Von?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 2:34:22Speaker 01

  Right, so I'm out in Mississippi on this farm, you see? And so, you know, you're learning what's out there and then you're trying to accentuate what's already out there. And because I think we probably got like

• 2:34:41Speaker 01

  three hundred deer, like.

• 2:34:44Theo Von?

  Wow.

• 2:34:47Theo Von?

  And they just running around everywhere?

• 2:34:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:34:51Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:34:53Speaker 01

  Because the way progress worked, they kept getting pinned in. And then there was a golf course and so they had a little safe area in between them. And then when houses start going in, then it became neighborhood.

• 2:35:13Theo Von?

  Less and less.

• 2:35:14Speaker 01

  Gated community and now there's nowhere else for them to be. And this particular area is where they all came to, so.

• 2:35:25Speaker 01

  Pretty wonderful.

• 2:35:26Theo Von?

  Yeah, I could see you having like a cool pet in zoo or something one day if you wanted to and you're, you know, you ever quit or just wanted to have a peaceful animal type of or a safari? Something like that.

• 2:35:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 2:35:40Theo Von?

  Cats, cats.

• 2:35:41Speaker 01

  I'm never trying to do something that requires interaction. Like what I'm, what I'm doing is creating heaven on earth.

• 2:35:51Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:35:51Speaker 01

  Right? So that means finding out all of the things that really make you jump for joy and excited and make you go, oh, and collecting those around yourself. So that no matter what it is you have to deal with in the world, you can come back to this little heavenly environment that you have created.

• 2:36:21Theo Von?

  That's it?

• 2:36:22Speaker 01

  That fuels you, you know?

• 2:36:25Theo Von?

  Yeah, that's the tour right there.

• 2:36:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:36:27Theo Von?

  Heaven on earth.

• 2:36:28Speaker 01

  As it turns out.

• 2:36:29Theo Von?

  Yeah.

• 2:36:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:36:30Theo Von?

  Cat man, thank you so much for spending time with me today, man.

• 2:36:32Speaker 01

  I appreciate it.

• 2:36:33Theo Von?

  Yeah, thanks for just so many things, so many quotable moments from your life that you've shared with us and yeah, it's an honor, bro. I really feel honored to be in your presence today and just, um, yeah, I can't even believe it. So thank you so much.

• 2:36:51Speaker 01

  Likewise.