300. Matt’s Answers for Better Speaking and Leadership

Celebrating 300 episodes with listener questions from around the world. In this special 300th episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart https://www.fastersmarter.io/, host Matt Abrahams celebrates a major milestone with a live Ask Matt Anything session featuring questions from listeners around the world—and a few from the team behind the show. He introduces a new communication framework, PREP (Point, Reason, Example, Point), before tackling topics ranging from word recall and public speaking nerves to storytelling, AI’s impact on communication, giving difficult feedback, and using gestures more effectively. Along the way, he shares practical strategies, favorite communication techniques, and lessons learned from 300 episodes dedicated to helping people communicate with confidence, clarity, and connection. To listen to the extended Deep Thinks version of this episode, please visit FasterSmarter.io/premium https://www.fastersmarter.io/premium/. Episode Reference Links: Ep.250 How to Navigate Conflict: Tools For Productive Communication https://www.fastersmarter.io/250-how-to-navigate-conflict-tools-for-productive-communication/ Connect: Premium Signup >>>> Think Fast Talk Smart Premium https://www.fastersmarter.io/premium/Email Questions & Feedback >>> [email protected] Transcripts >>>Think Fast Talk Smart Website https://www.fastersmarter.io/300-matts-answers-for-better-speaking-and-leadership/Newsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>>FasterSmarter.io http://fastersmarter.io/Think Fast Talk Smart >>>LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/think-fast-talk-smart/,Instagram https://www.instagram.com/thinkfasttalksmart/, YouTube https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL6caGRBUYZCmgDGM2RK6mxKB9jG_ccmm3Matt Abrahams >>>LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/maabrahams/ https://learning.fastersmarter.io/?redirect_from=podpageChapters: (00:00) - Introduction (01:13) - PREP Framework (04:13) - Improving Word Recall (07:10) - Public Speaking Nerves (11:35) - Concise vs. Detailed Communication (13:39) - AI & Communication Skills (16:12) - Storytelling Fundamentals (18:51) - Lingo vs. Jargon (20:22) - Difficult Feedback Conversations (22:36) - The Power of Paraphrasing (25:07) - Effective Gestures (29:28) - Conclusion ******** Thank you to our sponsors. These partnerships support the ongoing production of the podcast, allowing us to bring it to you at no cost. Learn more about how Notion https://www.notion.com/?utm_source=podcasts&utm_medium=thinkfast can support your business at notion.com/thinkfast. https://www.notion.com/?utm_source=podcasts&utm_medium=thinkfast Join our Think Fast Talk Smart Learning Community and become the communicator you want to be. https://learning.fastersmarter.io/?redirect_from=podpage

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Matt Abrahams?

  In the moment, conflict is difficult for everyone. In our October newsletter, out now, you will learn ways to help yourself handle these challenges better. Not only do you get specific advice, we're also providing an infographic to help you remember. Find our newsletter on the Think Fast, Talk Smart LinkedIn page or at fastersmarter.io under Resources. Communication is critical to success in your professional and personal lives. This idea has served as the guiding principle of our show ever since we started, and today we are thrilled to be celebrating our 300th episode with a special Ask Matt Anything.

• 0:41Matt Abrahams?

  My name is Matt Abrahams, and I teach strategic communication at Stanford Graduate School of Business. Welcome to Think Fast, Talk Smart, the podcast. It's hard to believe that this is our 300th episode. I want to start by thanking each and every one of you for listening and viewing our show. We work really hard to bring you great content through our show and social media, and we truly appreciate your input in helping us spread the word. For this episode, we wanted to hear from you and help with your communication issues and challenges. We recorded this live a few weeks back. I start with a quick lesson about a structure I find myself using more and more, and then we move into questions from listeners around the globe.

• 1:25Matt Abrahams?

  And as a special treat, I begin with questions from some of our amazing team that help bring you the show. So without further ado, let's get started. So, welcome. This is our 300th episode. We are excited that you are here, and we are thrilled that you take the time to listen to Think Fast, Talk Smart. Before I get started taking your questions, I would love to share a new favorite structure of mine. You are all very familiar with the fact that I love structure. Structure is nothing more than a logical way of putting your points forward.

• 2:07Matt Abrahams?

  We have all heard of my favorite structure, three questions. What? So what? Now what? This structure is very useful for lots of situations. You can use it when you're giving feedback, when you're giving an update, when you're introducing yourself. This structure is very useful for educating and informing. A new structure that I find myself relying on a lot as I have to articulate a point of view or defend a position is one I learned from a lawyer friend of mine. Prep. Point, reason, example, point. This is a great structure to use when you have to put forth an idea, when you have to support something that you're advocating for. It works very simply.

• 2:52Matt Abrahams?

  You make a point, you give a rationale or reason supporting that point. Give a concrete example. We tend to remember concrete examples far better than high-level information. And then we return to the point. So point, reason, example, point. Let me share with you an example that in the classes I teach at Stanford's Business School, we like to use as a way of getting practice with this. And I assign my students to defend one side of this argument. So some are for it and some are against it. So the issue is, is a burrito sushi? So how would you support that? If you wanted to support it, you might use prep. So let's walk through this one part at a time.

• 3:34Matt Abrahams?

  The point is, a burrito is technically a type of sushi. The reason, both are fundamentally seasoned rice fillings, tight, packly together in an edible cylindrical wrapper. An example, a burrito wraps meat and rice in a tortilla, while sushi is fish and rice wrapped in seaweed. So I would then restate my point. Thus, a burrito is technically a type of sushi. And in so doing, I have made a clear, concise point. So I challenge each of you to think about how you could use prep. I'm going to give all of you a little homework. The other issue that we debate in my class is, is soup cereal?

• 4:19Matt Abrahams?

  How would you defend that if you were to use prep? Point, reason, example, point. So now you have another structure to add to your toolkit of structures goes right next to what, so what, now what? So let's get into some of your questions and challenges that you have in your communication. But before I take time to take your questions, I want to introduce you to a few members of our team. This is our 300th episode and we work really hard to bring you the best in careers and communication advice. And while you get to see and hear me, there is an amazing team behind the scenes that brings this all to you.

• 5:01Matt Abrahams?

  So I thought it would be really fun to start our Q and A with some Q and A from the team. So it is my honor and privilege to invite to the screen Catherine Reed. Kat is our executive producer and the brains behind all of what you hear and see. Kat, how are you doing?

• 5:18Speaker 01

  I'm good. How are you, Matt?

• 5:20Matt Abrahams?

  I'm doing great. I love these live events. You have a question? I'd love to hear your question.

• 5:25Speaker 01

  Yes, very glad to be with you on this special occasion and thank you to all that were able to join. So my question is about word recall. I find for myself, there are many times during conversations or discussions when I know that there's a specific word that I want to use, but I can't quite seem to retrieve it in the moment. Sometimes I'll pause and I'll give myself some grace and say something like, what's the word I'm looking for to buy myself a little time? So my question is, do you have advice for improving word recall in those moments or strategies for retrieving the right word when it just feels like it's out of reach?

• 6:05Matt Abrahams?

  Well, I appreciate that question. And as somebody who's getting older, a retrieval of information of any kind is getting challenging. The first thing I would suggest, Kat, is that as you think about this, there really is no right word. There are certainly better words than others. So sometimes what makes it hard to retrieve a word is you have this word in mind and then you say, I want to say that right word. And then that puts added pressure to yourself. So I really like the fact that you take a pause, take a beat, take perhaps a deep breath in that moment. And when you take the pressure off of your Yourself of saying the right word, actually it might come more easily. The first thing is to not make it harder on yourself by adding to your anxiety level. The next piece has to do with the practice, the way we practice. Now, we don't want to memorize.

• 6:49Matt Abrahams?

  We don't want to make sure that every word is exactly the way we want it to say it. That adds extra pressure, but through repetition, those words become more comfortable and easy to retrieve. That's what practice is doing. It's actually laying down the neural pathways that make fluency easier for you. So part of it is the practice and the prep, again, not to memorize, but just to get familiar with. And then the second part is when you have that missed moment, don't put too much pressure on yourself. Take a deep breath and I hope that word will come. And I, Kat, as somebody who talks to you many times every day, have found that you use expert language and I've never noticed anything other than that. So thank you for your question. I appreciate it. Well, you got to meet Kat, our executive producer.

• 7:32Matt Abrahams?

  I'd like for you to meet another one of our absolutely instrumental and important colleagues here at Think Fast, Talk Smart. I'd love for you to meet Neil McFedron. Neil and I have been working together almost since the inception of the show. Neil, thanks for being with us and I'd love to hear what question you have.

• 7:50Speaker 02

  Thanks, Matt. Great to join you here. So Matt, my question's about a moment as well, like Kat's, but a different moment. So I'm curious about those first five seconds of public speaking, that exact moment when it just feels like all the eyes suddenly turn to you. So in fact, I just had one or one second I was sitting here listening and next I'm popped up on everyone's screen, asked this question. So whether it's joining a Zoom presentation, suddenly boom, you're the focus or walking out onto that stage after being introduced and the applause stops. And there's that instant where for me, it feels like I've just jumped into cold water. What are your favorite strategies for handling that surge of adrenaline, like settling your nerves? And ultimately, starting those first few seconds strongly?

• 8:33Matt Abrahams?

  Thank you for that question. And that moment right before you start, what I call commencing, is really powerful for many people and can be very anxiety fraught. So it's something we really need to think about. Let me share a few things about that moment. One, as we practice, as we prepare, which is really important to do, we can think about that moment, knowing that that moment might be difficult for us. We can desensitize ourselves to that moment. So we think about what it would be like, we can actually visualize the experience, and then think about how we might adjust and adapt in advance. Having that contingency plan ready to go, one, can allow us to invoke it when need be, and two, just

• 9:15Matt Abrahams?

  the fact that we know we have something to do if we get that surge of adrenaline in that moment, that can actually reduce its intensity just by knowing that we have something to do. So part of it is the preparation. When that moment hits, I want to walk you through three steps. When it comes to dealing with anxiety around speaking, we need to think of the ABCs. Affect, that's feeling. B is for behavior, how you physiologically feel. And then C is for cognition. And we can do a management technique for each. So let's start with the A. That emotion you feel might be dread, might be fear. In that moment, just remind yourself that it's normal and natural. Most people, and I mean like 85% of people, have that surge of anxiety that you're talking about. So recognizing

• 10:00Matt Abrahams?

  that it's normal and natural can help. And when you do that, you acknowledge it, you actually give yourself a little bit of space and agency so you can do something in that moment. A great thing to do is to remind yourself that this is normal and natural to feel anxious, and it actually is a sign that this is important to you and valuable. And you can get excited about something that's important and valuable. As you well know, Neil, a frequent guest of our show is Alison Woodbrooks. She did some groundbreaking research, well, quite a while back now, that said, if you reframe your anxiety as excitement, not only do you feel better, but you actually perform better. So in that moment, the affect piece, acknowledge, hey, this is me feeling nervous. Makes sense I'm nervous. Most people would be. And that's a sign that I should be excited.

• 10:43Matt Abrahams?

  About this in terms of behavior in that moment, five seconds, 10 seconds before you start, best thing you can do is take a deep belly breath. It's going to slow your heart rate down. It's going to calm down those nerves. Make sure your exhale is twice as long as your inhale. It is all in the exhale that the magic happens. And then finally, from a cognitive point of view, often in those few moments before we start speaking, we say a lot of negative things to ourselves. I'm not prepared. I should have done more. Why am I doing this? Why isn't this other person doing it? Instead, let's replace that with something positive, a positive affirmation, a positive mantra. Doesn't have to be I'm the best speaker ever. It could be something simple. This is what I do before I speak and I get nervous and I still do get nervous in some situations. I simply say I have value to bring.

• 11:28Matt Abrahams?

  I have something of value to the person or people that I'm speaking to. So first you prepare. You think about what will I do if I have that experience? And then ABC, the affective part, it's normal and natural. Typical for somebody to get nervous in this situation. B, do some deep breathing. That's for the behavioral piece. And C for the cognition, reframe it and see it through the lens of some kind of affirmation or mantra. If you do those things, you'll be better off. Thanks, Neil, and I'm glad everybody got to meet you and Kat. So let's see, we've got some questions coming in. First questions from Ethiopia. Wow, hello, hello. I talk a lot about tell the time, don't build the clock. Yet, on the other hand, I will often say,

• 12:11Matt Abrahams?

  listeners tend to remember specifics more than generalities. So I find those two concepts contradictory. How can you make sure that you're concise and clear? And at the same time, give detail? This is a great question because it is a contradiction, right? It is a little bit confusing. How can we be concise but detailed at the same time? So this is a trade off. And there are a number of trade offs that we have to make whenever we communicate. We want to be specific and detailed, but we also want to be clear and concise. So the question then becomes how much detail do I give? And it really depends on your audience and the emotional impact you're trying to have. If I am trying to really motivate. Press upon you how important this is.

• 12:56Matt Abrahams?

  I might spend a little bit more time giving detail. Because in that emotional experience you'll have of my detail. You are focusing in a way that you don't if I'm just relaying facts. If I'm just walking through, let's say, financial data or some technical data. Where there isn't as much emotion. It really depends on what your goal is in terms of the engagement you want. If you want engagement that's deep and perhaps emotional. Over index, spend a little more time giving detail, which means you won't be as concise. If you're giving details that are devoid or don't have a lot of emotions. Then I might really fixate on being concise and clear. To allow me to get to a point in my communication where I do want to bring emotion.

• 13:40Matt Abrahams?

  So I really appreciate the deep thinking that you had there in terms of the advice that I give. It is a tension between concision and depth. And you have to find your best way of navigating that. And I believe it has to do with who you're speaking to and the emotion you want to engage. Thank you so much for that question. Really insightful. I appreciate it. All right, our next question. With a growing reliance on AI for summarization, email drafts, slides. How do you ensure our cognitive and linguistic skills remain sharp? Oh, wow. This is something that I have been spending a lot of my time recently thinking about. AI is fundamentally changing the way we communicate.

• 14:21Matt Abrahams?

  And in fact, I believe that AI is actually making face to face, spontaneous, in the moment. Communication even more important. And it's more important because that's how we authentically connect. In theory, AI can polish and in some cases, perfect our communication. But it makes it more restrictive and blunts its emotion and reduces some of its connection. Part of that is that we offload our cognitive effort to the AI tool. We don't have to think as much. And communication and critical thinking are intimately related. You can't communicate well without critically thinking. And you can't critically think without being able to communicate well.

• 15:04Matt Abrahams?

  And as we offload some of that critical thinking burden, we ultimately, I fear, lessen our skills. And we're starting to see this. Some recent research came out that says people are speaking less, we're just saying less. Part of what AI does is it increases concision. So we speak less. People's language and words are starting to become compressed. In other words, we're sounding more the same because we're relying on the same tools. That's all just proof points to say that AI does have an impact on our communication. So how do we make sure to leverage AI for the many benefits it can bring to us and not suffer some of the consequences? Well, it has to do with when we use it and how we use it.

• 15:49Matt Abrahams?

  I think AI is a great tool to help you think through your audience, to use it as a thought partner in terms of different ways of arguing and structuring content, but do not rely on it to make all the decisions for you and to create the content instead of you actually thinking through it yourself. So use it as you would, let's say, a partner, or if you're a manager, as you might use an intern, somebody to help you, but not to do the work for you. Because if we outsource it all the way, we actually lose some of the most precious communication skills that we have. So thank you for that insightful question. This is an issue that I have been thinking about a lot, and you highlight both the value of AI and some of the downsides.

• 16:34Matt Abrahams?

  Let's see. In my work, I find that storytelling is important for sharing information with others rather than academic teaching. Do you have any takeaways for storytelling? Oh, storytelling is so important. First, human beings are storytelling machines. We are wired for story. Long before we had the written word, our species communicated information through stories. Think about folklore, legends, we're wired for story. So if we can tap into that, we can be much more successful. Stories engage and connect, so much so that when I tell a story, my brain weighs And your brainwaves sync up. It's called cognitive entrainment.

• 17:17Matt Abrahams?

  And in some cases, when you look at the neurological feedback, you can't tell who was telling the story versus who was receiving it. Now, the question becomes, how do we learn to become good storytellers? I hope this show, Think Fast, Talk Smart, provides some of the very important tools to do that. We've done several episodes on storytelling. We did one with Matthew Dix. We did a whole mini-series on storytelling from people who have non-traditional storytelling jobs. Think of a lawyer, think of a magician, lots of different situations where people tell stories. And we really tried to dissect them. It is a skill. It is a skill you can learn. And everybody has to develop their own style around storytelling.

• 18:02Matt Abrahams?

  A great way to get started is to think about stories in your life, things that have happened. Create a catalog of stories that you have experienced or that you have seen and begin to refine them. Think about how can I add detail, emotion, make it relatable to people? How can I start it in a way that's engaging? So it is a process. It's a process you have to practice. Another great way to get good at storytelling is just listen to other people's stories. Find people that you really admire, who tell good stories. Begin to dissect, what do they do? Do they start at the beginning? Or do they start in the middle and then bring you back to the beginning? Do they use a lot of descriptive words? Do they lead with emotion?

• 18:46Matt Abrahams?

  All of these are really interesting tools that you can deploy to be a better storyteller. I encourage all of you to work on your storytelling skills. And please, please, consider Think Fast, Talk Smart is a good resource for that. If you go to our website, fastersmarter.io, and you go to the resources page, you'll actually see some playlists that talk through stories and how to tell good stories. So thank you for that question. Let's see, from San Diego, one of my favorite places. How do you know when to use lingo to relate with your audience and to avoid jargon? Yeah, this is a really, again, a tricky tension that we have. Sometimes using specific terminology, lingo, as you say,

• 19:31Matt Abrahams?

  can actually demonstrate your competence. The problem is, if you use too much of it, or you use that terminology with others who aren't in the know or don't have the experience you do, then it tips into jargon, and jargon is wording that it can be distancing. One of my colleagues, he's been on the show twice, Huggy Rao. Huggy likes to talk about jargon monoxide. It suffocates communication. So we want to avoid using lingo, technical speak acronyms just for the use of them. They should serve a purpose. So if the purpose is to demonstrate competence, to connect with your audience on a deep level because they know the terms well, then I would suggest using those terms.

• 20:14Matt Abrahams?

  But if you think someone in the audience might not be aware, or they don't have the depth of knowledge, at the very least, define your terms. Maybe you show them on a slide, maybe you spell them out the first time you use them. There is more reputational risk, I believe, in using jargon, terminology people don't know, than there is reputational advantage to using lingo that people do know. I think you are set farther back by using jargon than you are put farther ahead by using appropriate lingo. So I'd like to introduce you to a few more of our team members who work tirelessly behind the scenes to help bring Think Fast, Talk Smart to you twice a week, every week. Kylie, I'd love to have you join me on screen.

• 20:58Matt Abrahams?

  Kylie helps with so many facets of how we make our show work for all of you. Welcome Kylie. I know you've got a question for me. Would love to hear it.

• 21:05Speaker 03

  Hi Matt, nice to see you here. I have a question about high emotion situations. As a leader, I sometimes feel very nervous before difficult one-on-one conversations with employees, especially when I need to ask a hard question or get constructive feedback where they could potentially get emotional. How do I stay calm before and during the moment, make sure I actually deliver my point while still addressing the situation clearly, but showing care?

• 21:36Matt Abrahams?

  Well, so Kylie, just so you all know, Kylie is a very empathetic and kind person, and that's demonstrated in your question, because often as a leader, we have to give constructive feedback, we have to give direction that might be challenging for those that are reporting to us, and it's really appropriate to be concerned about their emotions, but also your emotions. So if this is a circumstance where you actually get to plan it out in advance, then I would be thinking through not just the messaging, one of the many structures that we cover, what, so what, now what is a great way to give feedback, what is the feedback, so what is why it's important, now what is what you'd like the person to do differently. So thinking through the structure, maybe even practicing vocalizing,

• 22:18Matt Abrahams?

  it can help, but also thinking through the emotions that you might feel in that moment, and really think through what this might be like for you, anxiety, maybe there's a little bit of frustration with the person. By cataloging and thinking about those emotions first, that can help you come up with a contingency plan. And then remind yourself, your job as a leader, as a manager, is to help your team succeed and to help your employees succeed. And part of that is actually giving constructive feedback. So taking the time to plan the message and the plan for the emotion can be really helpful.

• 22:56Speaker 03

  That's really helpful. Thank you very much.

• 22:58Matt Abrahams?

  Very good. All right, let me now take one more question from one of our team that helps bring the show. I'd like to bring Greg in. Greg is so helpful, particularly on all the technical aspects of our show. Greg, good to see you. Thanks for being here. I'd love to hear your question.

• 23:14Speaker 04

  Wonderful to see you too. Thanks, Matt, and hello, listeners. Okay, my question is this, and I think the listeners will have noticed this, listening to this show, that you have a superpower. And that superpower is summarizing. You have an incredible ability to do it. You've listened to somebody speak, and you repeat back what they've said in your own words. And what that does for us as listeners of the show, I think it clarifies what's been said and helps us to understand and remember. And having worked with you now for a couple of years, what it does for me personally is it shows empathy. It shows that you are listening to what I'm saying. And so it feels good as the person receiving that summary back. And so my question to you is this, what is going through your mind

• 23:58Speaker 04

  right now, as you are listening to my long rambling preamble to my question, so that you can summarize what I have said?

• 24:06Matt Abrahams?

  So you're really asking about paraphrasing and how I go about doing it. As I listen to our guests, as I listen to you, as I will be listening and reading the questions from others today, I am always asking myself, what's the bottom line of what person is saying and why and how is it relevant, in the case of the interviews on the show, to the audience? As you're speaking, I'm listening intently and I'm constantly thinking to myself, what's the bottom line? What's the key point the person is making? I might get it wrong, and that's where paraphrasing actually helps, because not only does it validate you, it says, I've heard you, but it also allows me to validate that I got it right, because if I miss it, you can correct me.

• 24:50Matt Abrahams?

  Paraphrasing not only is a tool for connection, it's a fidelity check. Fidelity is the accuracy and clarity of the transmission of the information. It's a wonderful tool to connect, and it's a wonderful tool to make sure I'm hearing what people are saying, and I encourage all of you to practice. At the end of every one of our episodes, I would love for you to take a moment and say, what was the bottom line key takeaway from that episode for me, you as the listener? And then we hope you put it into practice, but by training that skill, you can really help yourself connect and make sure you're accurately hearing information. How'd I do, Greg? Did I paraphrase that well?

• 25:28Speaker 04

  You paraphrased it well.

• 25:29Matt Abrahams?

  Craig, you do amazing work, as does the rest of the team. Thank you for the question. Let's take one final question, please. Please share tips for beginning speakers to seem unplanned in using gestures while having actually planned and rehearsed ahead. Oh, well, I've got a little teaser for you. Coming up, actually, right around the time this episode, our 300th episode airs, I am interviewing Vanessa Van Edwards, and Vanessa is an amazing researcher as well as a presenter on communication issues, and we talked exactly about this issue. You'll hear the dialogue and discussion there, but I'll give you a summary here. Gestures are really important. Gestures are, for the audience, a way that we can engage in a multimodal way.

• 26:13Matt Abrahams?

  Our brains are primarily designed To take in the world visually. There are more parts of the human brain dedicated to vision, seeing than to the other senses. So while I'm speaking, you have an area in your brain that's verbal, but there's a lot more that's visual. So when I'm gesturing in a consistent way, I'm actually reinforcing what I'm saying because you're seeing it and you're hearing it. And I'm activating a lot of brain regions for doing it. Now, for me, as a communicator, the one in this case, speaking gestures actually offload cognitive load. So when I gesture, I actually make it easier for myself to think. So if my gestures are consistent with what I'm saying, it actually helps me be clearer.

• 26:58Matt Abrahams?

  It increases my processing fluency. And for you, it makes it easier to understand because I'm engaging multiple brain systems. So gesturing is really important. How do we practice it, though, so we don't look robotic? First, we do not want to script gestures. I do not want to start a speech in a very scripted way because it looks scripted. It looks disingenuous. It looks inauthentic. So how do we practice? For many people who are just beginning to work on gestures, my biggest bit of advice is play charades as you speak. Charades is a game where we don't use words to describe things. We use our gestures. Use what are known as descriptive gestures. So if I'm standing up, giving a sales pitch and say, this is a big opportunity, I gesture big.

• 27:43Matt Abrahams?

  I wouldn't say this is a big opportunity and gesture small. If I were saying profits will likely rise, I do a gesture that demonstrates rising. You're mimicking or mirroring the words in your gestures. And if you're not comfortable with gesturing, or you want to learn to gesture more, starting with descriptive gestures is easiest. Then you graduate to what are called emphatic gestures. And if you've ever watched me speak, you see I use a lot of these. Emphatic gestures are gestures that add emphasis. They don't have an immediate correlate to what I'm saying. A former student of mine actually introduced a technique to me for practicing this as he was preparing for a presentation he had in my class. What he would do

• 28:25Matt Abrahams?

  Is he would audio record himself, do like a voice memo of him presenting his presentation, not memorized, not reading it. He would just talk it through and record it. And then he would put earbuds in, he would stand up and he would listen to himself saying the words and he would just walk around practicing the gestures that he might say as those words were delivered, not to script them, but to give him the cognitive bandwidth. He didn't have to think of what to say because he was just listening to himself say it. He could actually think about his gestures and say, you know, at this point, I should probably do a really big gesture. At this point, maybe I should move because it's a transition. He was freeing up his brain to think about how he wanted to gesture because

• 29:10Matt Abrahams?

  he didn't need to use all of that cognitive bandwidth to think of what he was saying. So this is a great way to practice. It's an intermediate step. You absolutely need to practice speaking and gesturing. But before that, you can do this technique of recording it, listening to it while you're presenting. So those are all ways to hone and develop gesturing. Start with descriptive gestures. Know that gestures are helping you and your audience and record yourself and practice listening to that recording. With that, I will simply say, first, thank you for joining me for this. I thoroughly enjoyed the questions. I hope you found value in the answers.

• 29:50Matt Abrahams?

  So there you have it, our 300th episode. Thank you again for listening and your support. Do me a huge favor and be sure to subscribe and rate us. Also, follow us on LinkedIn, TikTok, and Instagram. If you like celebration episodes, please take a listen to our 250th episode, all about managing conflict. This episode was produced by Catherine Reed, Shelby Meriwether, Ryan Campos, and me, Matt Abrahams. Our music is from Floyd Wonder, with special thanks to Podium Podcast Company. Please find us on YouTube and wherever you get your podcasts. Check out fastersmarter.io for deep dive videos, English language learning content, and our newsletter. Please consider joining our Think Fast, Talk Smart

• 30:33Matt Abrahams?

  learning community at fastersmarter.io/learning. You'll find video lessons, learning quests, discussion boards, an AI coach, and book club opportunities. Again, that's fastersmarter.io/learning to become part of our Think Fast, Talk Smart learning community.

• 30:52Matt Abrahams?

  Before we wrap up, I just want to say thank you for listening. It really means a lot to hear how people all over the world are using these ideas in their own lives. It inspires me and the whole team that brings you this show. If you want more episodes and resources, feel free to follow, subscribe, and explore past conversations. We're grateful for your support of Think Fast, Talk Smart.