244. Community Creates Change: Build Relationships That Actually Matter

Why community is the most powerful tool for transformation. Community isn't just a feel-good buzzword. According to Gina Bianchini https://www.fastersmarter.io/guests/gina-bianchini/, it's a catalyst for personal and collective transformation. Bianchini is the CEO and founder of community-building platform, Mighty Networks, and author of the book Purpose: Design a Community and Change Your Life https://www.fastersmarter.io/purpose-design-a-community. "Community is when people come together, and every single member has something to give and something to receive," she explains. In contrast to the one-directional dynamic of a speaker and their audience or a creator and their following, Bianchini argues that the power of community lies in two-way exchanges, where each member benefits the group and benefits from it. "Community is the single most effective way to get results and transformation you just can't get on your own," she says. In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart https://www.fastersmarter.io/, Bianchini joins host Matt Abrahams to discuss how to unlock the potential of purposeful communities. She shares strategies for finding your tribe during times of transition, the "people magic” created when we facilitate deep connections, and how creating community enables us to create the world and lives we imagine. To listen to the extended Deep Thinks version of this episode, please visit FasterSmarter.io/premium https://www.fastersmarter.io/premium/. Episode Reference Links: Gina Bianchini https://www.fastersmarter.io/guests/gina-bianchini/Gina’s Book: Purpose https://www.fastersmarter.io/purpose-design-a-communityEp.174 Fix Meetings: Transform Gatherings Into Meaningful Moments https://www.fastersmarter.io/174-fix-meetings-transform-gatherings-into-meaningful-moments/ Connect: Premium Signup >>>> Think Fast Talk Smart Premium https://www.fastersmarter.io/premium/Email Questions & Feedback >>> [email protected] Transcripts >>>Think Fast Talk Smart Website https://www.fastersmarter.io/244-community-creates-change-build-relationships-that-actually-matter/Newsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>>FasterSmarter.io http://fastersmarter.io/Think Fast Talk Smart >>>LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/think-fast-talk-smart/,Instagram https://www.instagram.com/thinkfasttalksmart/, YouTube https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL6caGRBUYZCmgDGM2RK6mxKB9jG_ccmm3Matt Abrahams >>>LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/maabrahams/ Chapters: (00:00) - Introduction (00:46) - Defining Community vs. Audience (02:34) - Community as a Catalyst for Transformation (05:10) - Finding the Right Community (08:58) - The Future Story Framework (11:51) - People Magic & Facilitation (16:10) - The Final Three Questions (22:02) - Conclusion ******** Thank you to our sponsors. These partnerships support the ongoing production of the podcast, allowing us to bring it to you at no cost. Learn more about how Notion https://www.notion.com/?utm_source=podcasts&utm_medium=thinkfast can support your business at notion.com/thinkfast. https://www.notion.com/?utm_source=podcasts&utm_medium=thinkfast Join our Think Fast Talk Smart Learning Community and become the communicator you want to be. https://learning.fastersmarter.io/?redirect_from=podpage

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Matt Abrahams?

  In the moment, conflict is difficult for everyone. In our October newsletter, out now, you will learn ways to help yourself handle these challenges better. Not only do you get specific advice, we're also providing an infographic to help you remember. Find our newsletter on the Think Fast, Talk Smart LinkedIn page or at fastersmarter.io under Resources. Community catalyzes transformation. My name is Matt Abrahams and I teach strategic communication at Stanford Graduate School of Business. Welcome to Think Fast, Talk Smart, the podcast. Today, I am incredibly excited and very curious to speak with Gina Bianchini.

• 0:41Matt Abrahams?

  Gina is the CEO and founder of Mighty Networks, a community building platform. Prior to Mighty Networks, she was the CEO and co-founder of Ning, a global platform for creating niche social networks. Gina also wrote the book Purpose: Design a Community and Change Your Life. Well, welcome Gina. I so look forward to this conversation. I look forward to continuing the conversations we've had prior.

• 1:03Speaker 01

  Thank you for having me. This is so nice.

• 1:05Matt Abrahams?

  It is. It's awesome. So shall we get started?

• 1:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, let's do it.

• 1:08Matt Abrahams?

  So to start, can you define what you mean by community and distinguish it from an audience or a following? What is the value of a community in general?

• 1:18Speaker 01

  Community is when people come together and every single member has something to give and something to receive. Now, contrast that to an audience. Following is, I am important and I am valued based on the number of followers, as if they're nameless, faceless people who are less than me. So, the work that I am doing and the work that the technology has never been available before to take advantage of this is, every single person in a community has something important to offer. And we have an amazing ability today to build communities like the very best party you've ever been to, where you show up and you're like, wait a second, everyone

• 2:01Speaker 01

  here, tell me more. And I like myself in this room because I'm looking around and every single person that I am seeing and meeting and talking to is interested in me, but also is a really interesting person. Now, compare that to what has happened in real life with people that have been brought up in social media. You start to notice something really interesting if you pay attention to it, which is people start by talking about themselves. Because the way that we are being conditioned is what is important is what I have to say versus how I'm showing up for other people. So to me, that is the core difference of a community is that every single person matters and it is a network of peers

• 2:46Speaker 01

  versus star on the stage that is collecting people's attention in a way that is not actually introducing them to other people in that following.

• 2:56Matt Abrahams?

  When I first heard of your work, I was really moved by the way you look at community because I have, over time, really come to believe that connection happens in community. We call connections like followers, that's a connection I have, but what you're really talking about is that bidirectional, we have something to give, we have something to learn. And it really highlights, as you mentioned, social media really isn't that social. It's really broadcasting. And to have a community of like-minded individuals who all share some similar ideas and where everybody can benefit is really powerful. And you've argued in your book, Purpose, and I've heard you talk about this before, that community can

• 3:39Matt Abrahams?

  serve as a catalyst for transformation. And I'd love to hear more about how can community lead us to that transformation and through that transformation.

• 3:49Speaker 01

  Human beings are designed to get results and transformation in their lives from being members of communities, of having an identity as a runner, an identity

• 4:01Speaker 01

  As a leader. And so, power of community, it really is, I think about it as three things. So, number one, a community is the absolute most effective way to navigate rapid change because all the content in the world doesn't help you. In a real-time environment, only people talking to each other in real-time is what is going to help us all navigate the world that is moving faster and faster. A community is the most effective way to build new practices and change habits because you don't have to lean into and on your own self-discipline. Now, again, some social sciences, some psychologists would say more or less that's true, that

• 4:45Speaker 01

  we don't have a finite amount of like willpower. But let's just say it's easier to build new practices and build new habits in the context of being surrounded by people who are on the same path. If all your friends stop drinking, it's a heck of a lot easier to stop drinking. It becomes much less of a thing. And then finally, if community is the single most effective way to navigate rapid change and build new practices and habits, it is the fastest way to get results and transformation you just can't get on your own. So, I really look at creating communities, hosting communities, joining communities in a way that is about what you can give and then ask.

• 5:27Speaker 01

  It is the most important and also the most energizing thing that any of us can do.

• 5:32Matt Abrahams?

  The ability of a community to catalyze change and cement that change is really powerful. I think about the changes in my own life and how they were accelerated and supported through the communities that I have. When my wife and I started our family, we had a strong community. When my father passed away, we had a strong community. As my career has evolved, it has been through the support of others in similar positions. So, the ability to have community help us change. It can be challenging, though, to find that right community. And certainly, communities can lead to bad behavior as well. What advice do you have for finding your tribe, for finding your community?

• 6:16Speaker 01

  One of the easiest ways to find community is today through the creators that you follow. Because there are the ones like you and like others that are like, hey, I've done the hard work of building an audience and now I'm ready to take them from a dark room that everybody's sitting, listening to me to, hey, let's roll up our sleeves, let's get people in groups, let's get people together, and let's go practice, let's go on some quests. And while I tend to try to stay away from advice, because it turns out, advice shuts a conversation down, it shuts community down. Whereas if you reposition or reframe advice to sharing stories, sharing ideas, sharing experiences, it expands the conversation

• 7:00Speaker 01

  because then everybody has room to communicate and contribute. So what I would share is my own experience of the power of tapping into transitions, your own or others, is when people are the most motivated to actually try new things, to actually meet new people. And where this really became true for me and where it crystallized was, this was maybe a couple of decades ago, but I was just like stuck where I was physically. And I went to New York for two months. And where in Palo Alto, I would find reasons to not go out. I'm like, why do I need to go out? When I was in New York, I was like, hey, do any of my friends have friends I should meet?

• 7:44Speaker 01

  Oh, you guys are going out? Sure, I'll go. And that's the moment. So the more that you can find those things that are about transitions and where you're the most motivated, but you're also going to meet other motivated people, that is the best way to start communities and it is the best way to join communities. And there is something about just showing up and being open and introducing yourself not as a way to give somebody your resume or flex in ways that make you feel better because that's what you're supposed to do on social media, but rather showing up, introducing yourself and just being curious about the other person.

• 8:27Speaker 01

  Those small moments do more for building the quality of connection that ultimately creates those results and transformation, that value creation.

• 8:38Matt Abrahams?

  I find it really interesting that when I asked, how do you find community, that I was thinking you go search here and you go search there. But in fact, what you took that question to be, and I think this is the better way to take it, which is, how do you get yourself in a place where you are ready to find community and ready to participate? And it's identifying transitions. Certainly in my life, I can reflect on that and see how that played out. And being open, we can get very insular and safe in our habits. And we have to be open. We have to look for those places of transition and others who are open in the places of transition. And a great place to start is with people that you respect and you have at least some fundamental connection with creators, teachers, folks who do something similar.

• 9:20Matt Abrahams?

  I want to switch to this notion of future story, because I think it fits into what we're discussing. Can you define what you mean by future story? And how can those who are trying to build community leverage this future story to help congregate people?

• 9:36Speaker 01

  So one of my investors and just mentors who I admire tremendously is a guy named Mike Maples. And Mike wrote this incredible book called Pattern Breakers. But even before he wrote the book, he would talk about this whole concept of backcasting. So the whole idea was, and it's what futurists have done for 70 years, where you start in the future and you look backwards. And a little bit of a backstory here is the whole concept of a future story came out of, as I was teaching people how to create communities, what became very clear to me is that it starts with purpose. And it starts with the same purpose that any individual who doesn't even want to start

• 10:19Speaker 01

  a community, doesn't even want to join a community, having a purpose, a grounding clarity in how to take our time, our talents, our energy into the kind of impact we want to have. And what I realized is this concept of backcasting is so powerful. But what is underlying all of it is the clearer any of us can get, looking out five years and with as much vivid detail as possible. What does the day in the life look like? Who are you surrounded by? Where are you living? What kind of impact have you had? Who do you spend time connecting to?

• 11:01Speaker 01

  Being so clear in your own head about what that world is five years from now has so much power and it is absolutely free. It costs no money. Grab a piece of paper and write your future story. What does the world look like in five years? What is the world you want to live in? And I think so much of the moment that we are in right now, where there is so much division, has a lot to do with the fact that more and more of us are distracted all the time. And we don't have time to say, what is the world that we want to live in? Whether that's our day to day life or whether that's the world more broadly? What is important?

• 11:43Speaker 01

  What are the things worth not just fighting for, but believing in? And the more vivid any of us can be in telling that story, you give yourself the absolute best chance at making that a reality.

• 11:57Matt Abrahams?

  So a future story allows you to clearly define what's important to you and what that can look like for you. And that level of detail provides additional motivation.

• 12:06Speaker 01

  And clarity. Like so many of us can sit down. It's like, oh, what's my personal mission statement? That's different than a future story.

• 12:14Matt Abrahams?

  It helps us make it a reality and it helps us understand where we need the support that a community can bring. And having that focus and clarity can really be motivational because it can feel very intimidating when I know I want to change, but I don't know where I want to go. So you've built a platform, Mighty Networks, and you say that part of what it does is allows for people magic to take place. And you describe that as the connecting of relevant people to each other. What role does communication play in this people magic? One of the things that I very much have gravitated towards, because this is something that's very important to me beyond communication, is the ability to facilitate. Because there's the broadcasting of communication,

• 12:56Matt Abrahams?

  but then there's the actual hard act of bringing together, facilitating. Share with me what people magic is and the role communication plays in that.

• 13:04Speaker 01

  What People Magic is designed to do is make the facilitation easier and easier so that more people can do it and more people can do it effectively. But the easiest way to think about it is, coming back to that openness, I don't care who you are and I don't care how many followers you have, how popular or unpopular you are. When you are walking into a party, you're a little nervous. And the difference between your ability to relax and enjoy and meet people and create value and connection is that person who either is the host or a friend of the host who comes

• 13:45Speaker 01

  over to you and is like, Matt, I am so glad you're here. I invited you with purpose. I invited you with intention and oh my God, you have got to meet Josh. I knew you guys would hit it off because... And then there's all sorts of different techniques for like how to make that connection. But what have I just done? I've put you at ease. I have hopefully hyped you up a little bit because in the same way that like hurt people hurt people, confident people connect with other people. Like the social lubricant that exists to create networks of people and communities of people come from confidence.

• 14:25Speaker 01

  When you feel good, when you feel like you have something to bring to the picnic. And so a facilitator also does something really important, which is I'm going to make sure you don't feel like you're on the spot. So in facilitating, I'm going to structure, I'm going to guide, I'm going to be in charge of the experience that we are creating here together so that you get results and transformation. And I believe in a time and a place where as people, we are going to increasingly be competing with more and more powerful software that wants to be like us, that wants to take

• 15:07Speaker 01

  more and more time from human beings, the hosts and the facilitators are going to be the ones that ensure that we are harnessing the power of software to make the people we meet, the people we connect with, the people that we build at a level of awesomeness that up until this point relied almost exclusively on luck and serendipity.

• 15:32Matt Abrahams?

  I think that's a really interesting way to define facilitation is proactive, productive serendipity. And I like that definition. I spend a lot of time helping people with the practical tactical skills of facilitation. And I agree with you, it's about helping people feel welcome, helping people feel psychologically safe, making sure that they don't feel like they're on the spot. And I like this idea of host. We had Priya Parker on who likes the same ideas. And certainly, we've talked with Amy Edmondson about psychological safety. A good facilitator helps bring that about. You set up the context and the environment for the magic to happen. But it's really hard because you have to be incredibly vigilant. And I had not thought of, as you rightly

• 16:12Matt Abrahams?

  introduced, that a good host or facilitator is also the one who can maximize and leverage the technology, be it AI or other tools, to help, again, set the scene, set the table for the community building.

• 16:28Matt Abrahams?

  We'll be right back to finish our conversation. But first, we're going to take a quick break for a word from our sponsors. Their support covers the cost of production so we can bring you this show for free. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. The best communicators don't just get their message across, they make it easy for people to know what to do next. Your website can do the same thing. With Squarespace, you can build a polished online presence that clearly shows people who you are, what you offer, and how they can work with you. If you offer coaching, consulting, classes, or other services, Squarespace lets you showcase those offerings, take payments, and use Acuity Scheduling so people can book time with you directly. And with built-in analytics, you can see how people are finding and engaging with

• 17:11Matt Abrahams?

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• 17:54Matt Abrahams?

  across areas like marketing, design, software development, AI, and business operations. And with Business Plus, you can access the top 1% of talent on Upwork. AI-powered shortlisting gives you a curated list of freelancers matched to your goals in under six hours. So you can spend less time searching for the right person and more time actually moving the work forward. Visit upwork.com right now and post your job for free. That's upwork.com to connect with top talent ready to help your business grow. That's U.P.W.O.R.K. dot com. Upwork.com.

• 18:31Matt Abrahams?

  Well, Gina, I knew this was going to be a fantastic conversation. You and I are very aligned on the power of community. I'd like to end, the way I end all these podcasts, with three questions, one I create just for you and the other two I've been asking lots of people. So my first question is a little different than the community building. You've had to navigate the venture capital world in many capacities. Many of the people listening in have to pitch ideas. And I'm curious, what's your best advice for communicating a new disruptive idea, especially to those who might be a little skeptical or entrenched in the way things are?

• 19:04Speaker 01

  The rookie move is I'm going to convince the people who are skeptical. The masters are like, that's not the job. The job is to find the true believers. So what does that look like? When you are a true believer in your ideas, you're like, I need to convince every single person that I meet that this is the future. And the problem is that when somebody tells you no, it's crushing, but also it feels so personal. So one of the things that I have observed that is absolutely critical is number one, volume.

• 19:39Speaker 01

  You have to feel like you have abundance in the number of people that you can talk to. So if that's a spreadsheet of people that you are going to go down that list. So that the no's and the rejections that are inevitable. I wish that I was the kind of person that welcomed rejection. I don't, but that has helped a lot. The next time that I am going to fundraise, I will have 100 names and I will go through 100. And my expectation will be that I have to go through 100 and I just need one. And I'm going through that list to find the true believers. Finding a true believer that was already thinking about this stuff, that is your idea,

• 20:22Speaker 01

  is much more powerful and important in the ultimate success that you're going to have than trying to convince a skeptic.

• 20:30Matt Abrahams?

  I like that reframe. The goal is not to move the skeptic. The goal is to find the true believer. And the way to do that is to open up to as many people as possible and really think through and identify. And that reframe on who the real audience is, I think, can really change how a lot of people accomplish things. Question number two, who is a communicator that you admire and why?

• 20:53Speaker 01

  Steve Jobs. Just the ability to capture not just the vision of where the intersection of art and science can go, but in every area, just watching somebody who, as a communicator, could help everybody see what something new could be and what excellence could look like. And the ability to bring people to an entirely new level of contribution. The teams that he put together, the vision that he set, the future story that he was talking about in his twenties that happened in his forties.

• 21:35Speaker 01

  That level and what everyone I know who worked with him will say is he made it look like he was a natural and he wasn't.

• 21:45Matt Abrahams?

  There are many famous stories about how much work he put into what he did. But the ability to identify a goal, a vision, and communicate it and then assemble the community or teams, really important. I can understand why you would gravitate towards Steve Jobs. Final question. What are the first three ingredients that go into a successful communication recipe?

• 22:05Speaker 01

  I think that ingredient number one is so what? So the little trick that I learned from a woman named Imogen Kim, who I love, was so that we can, so that we can, or so that you can, or so that I can. The so that we can, that is the why and the benefits and the results. And once that snapped into place for me, it gave that communication hint to anybody who's listening, why. I think that's ingredient number one. Ingredient number two is detail. And the real masterclass of detail

• 22:45Speaker 01

  is when you can communicate significant detail in as few words as possible. That's when you hit magic in communication. Because if you're too detailed and use too many words, people zone out. If you go to too few words, you will want to abstract it. And you see this if you try to like put into ChatGPT or Claude or whatever, hey, make this shorter. And it's the most generic thing in the world. So finding that detail in as few words as possible, I think it is the absolute hardest thing in communication and the absolute just north star of communication. And then I think that the third thing is heart. Not trying to BS your way through things, but rather, what do I really care about? What is really

• 23:30Speaker 01

  important to me? How do I show up for an idea? And how do I leave people feeling about the idea, the concept, me as a messenger? I think that is something important to pay attention to.

• 23:46Matt Abrahams?

  Having that passion, that heart, the emotion, absolutely critical, you clearly demonstrate that. I like this idea of taking so what and evolving it into so that we can. And finding that sweet spot of detail and concision, really important, really difficult to do. But what a wonderful recipe. And what a wonderful conversation, Gina. I love the community that you and I have built and the way we interact and the power of community to transform and the power of community to evolve just content in one way, communication to really being something that's special and can help people grow. Thank you so much for your time and thank you so much for your insight.

• 24:24Speaker 01

  Thank you for having me.

• 24:27Matt Abrahams?

  Thank you for joining us for another episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, the podcast. To learn more about community, please listen to episode 174 with Priya Parker. Please consider joining our Think Fast, Talk Smart learning community at fastersmarter.io/learning. You'll find video lessons, learning quests, discussion boards, Matt's AI coach and our book club. Again, that's fastersmarter.io/learning to become part of our Think Fast, Talk Smart learning community. This episode was produced by Catherine Reed, Ryan Campos and me, Matt Abrahams. Our music is from Floyd Wonder. With thanks to Podium Podcast Company. Please find us on YouTube and wherever you get your podcasts. Be sure to subscribe and rate us.

• 25:11Matt Abrahams?

  Also, follow us on LinkedIn, TikTok and Instagram. Before we wrap up, I just want to say thank you for listening. It really means a lot to hear how people all over the world are using these ideas in their own lives. It inspires me and the whole team that brings you this show. If you want more episodes and resources, feel free to follow, subscribe and explore past conversations. We're grateful for your support of Think Fast, Talk Smart.