I Have Some Thoughts Minisode | Jordyn Woods, Coco Jones, NABJ Award, & Food Recalls

Welcome back to our minisode series, "I Have Some Thoughts." These short episodes are designed to contextualize the pop culture moments we're currently paying attention to through a mental health lens. Pop culture isn't just fun to chat about, it can reveal important information about how we relate, cope, and understand ourselves. Join us each Friday to hear Dr. Joy share her thoughts about the happenings of the week. This week, we're chatting the new Black brides, the NABJ Two Thumbs Down Award, and the endless food recalls. Stay Connected​https://click.convertkit-mail.com/27uv20p9mpioh8edr34s8ug63w344hg/58hvh8ug08p6wzc6/dGhlcmFweWZvcmJsYWNrZ2lybHMuY29tb3JibGFja2dpcmxzLmNvbS9wYXRyZW9u Wanna chat more about the pop culture hot topics of the week? Join us inside our Patreon https://community.therapyforblackgirls.com/ community. Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Submit it at therapyforblackgirls.com/mailbox https://www.therapyforblackgirls.com/mailbox. If you're looking for a therapist in your area, check out the directory at https://www.therapyforblackgirls.com/directory. Make sure to follow us on social media: Instagram: @therapyforblackgirls https://www.instagram.com/therapyforblackgirls Threads: @therapyforblackgirls https://www.threads.com/therapyforblackgirls Our Production Team Executive Producers: Dennison Bradford & Gabrielle Collins Director of Podcast & Digital Content: Ellice Ellis Producer: Ndeye Thioubou Production Assistant: Bria Mosley See omnystudio.com/listener https://omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed Human.

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  A rare disease diagnosis can change your life, but it doesn't have to define your future. In season seven of Untold Stories, Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition, host Martine Hackett continues the conversation with people living with MG, CIDP, and the broader rare disease community, exploring what comes after diagnosis through stories of hope, progress, and connection. Produced by Ruby Studio in partnership with Argenx. Listen on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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• 1:24Speaker 01

  Hey y'all, and welcome back to I Have Some Thoughts, our weekly therapy for Black girls mini-soed series where we talk about all things pop culture, but of course, from a mental health lens. And I'm joined today again with Bria. Hey, Bria.

• 1:36Speaker 00

  Hi, Dr. Joy. Excited for the topics this week. We have a lot of really cool stuff to get into. So for our first topic, let's talk about all of the Black girls that we just see in love. I feel like for the last couple of weeks, it's been back to back. Jordyn Woods got married to Colin T. Towns, I think, last weekend. Kami Crawford got married this past weekend. Coco Jones got married a few weeks ago, too. I feel like seeing so many Black brides and couples celebrated publicly, it's really created these moments of joy online, the weddings, Black love, Black designers, Black women just visibly being loved and cherished out loud on social media.

• 2:18Speaker 00

  And so I wanted to talk about, like, what does seeing Black women loved out loud actually do? Especially for an environment and a world that kind of focuses on these narratives where Black women may be portrayed as undesired or alone. So how can Black women being loved out loud kind of translate in that way?

• 2:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, the biggest smile, because all of the photos that I've seen have been beautiful, like the gowns, the fashion, the layouts, like, it is all just like, it feels very reminiscent of like when we used to see these threads. And I feel like we have been missing that for some time, so I'm loving like all the behind the scenes content and like looks that we are getting. But I also think, when you think about like just the landscape of the world right now, I think it is providing some much needed moments of joy for a lot of us, right? Like just a nice distraction from like all the awful things happening in the world. And I think it also does our hearts good to see Black women loved and cherished in these ways, whether it is something that we desire or not. Like, I think it just feels good to see Black women celebrated and being able to have these beautiful displays of weddings

• 3:24Speaker 01

  and partners who seemingly really appreciate them and lift them up and have been very supportive, at least in these examples for sure. I feel like these men have been like very publicly supportive of their partners, which I think is also a nice refrain and like provides a nice balance to maybe some of the other conversations we see online.

• 3:43Speaker 00

  No, definitely. In your opinion, how have cultural narratives about Black women and relationships and love, how has that kind of shaped the way that Black women approach dating and love sometimes?

• 3:55Speaker 01

  I feel like it can be very like a Debbie Downer sometimes, right? Like this whole idea that like, oh, I don't want a relationship or like there are no good partners left kind of thing. You know, and of course, to each their own. If you're not interested in dating, like, that is totally fine, but I think a lot of people are. But I think sometimes the online narratives can be very loud in terms of, oh, the dating pool is full of pee. It's something that I have seen a lot, right? And I don't doubt anybody's experience, but I do think that there is an air of like dating and relationships that is so much luck-based, right? And so much of it is just kind of continuing to put yourself out there, even maybe when you don't feel like it.

• 4:35Speaker 01

  And I think sometimes there is some tension between that idea and like the narrative that we see predominantly featured online, maybe some of the loudest voices, so to speak.

• 4:44Speaker 00

  Totally agree. And then lastly, when you see these types of moments on social media, obviously, there's a lot of joy around them and seeing Black women in love. How can we make space, though, for Black women whose lives don't include or currently, they might want this relationship, but it's just not there yet? How do we make space for those Black women that might have conflicting emotions about this? Because you see it, and it's great, but it's also like, oh, I would love that for me, too.

• 5:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. And I think that's fair. And I think that's kind of like why we started this mini-soed series of the podcast, right? Because of course, us looking at Jordyn Woods's beautiful pictures, there can be some joy, but I think we also have to think about like what's getting activated for us, right? And are we overreacting to pictures or like a story that's being created online? Because at the end of the day, these are still like people that most of us don't know, right? Some of us maybe have experiences and connections to them, but I certainly do not, and most of us don't, right? And so I think it is really about paying attention to what are our reactions? And going to our journals and maybe to our group chats and maybe even to therapy to talk about what's coming up for us? Because I think you're right, like, there can be lots of joy and lots of fun and lots of, oh, let me go to my Pinterest board and like plan my future wedding, right?

• 5:59Speaker 01

  Like, there can be some fun to that. But I think for a lot of people, we can actually open up some attachment wounds that maybe you're still trying to work through or like, when is it gonna be my turn? Like, all of that is very fair and valid, and I don't think you want to shame yourself for having any kind of experience. But I do think it is important for you to think about like, okay, where is this coming from? For me, instead of maybe like acting out online, right? Or projecting our experiences, right? Like, because Jordan and Coco's happy day does not mean that you don't deserve one or that they didn't deserve it, right? Like, everybody has their own experience. And so I think it's important to just really look at what's coming up for you as you see these stories and then thinking through and reflecting on your own reactions.

• 6:43Speaker 00

  Absolutely. Thank you. So moving on to something that's a little bit less lovey dovey and sweet. This past weekend, the National Association of Black Journalists gave Stephen A. Smith its 2026 Thumbs Down Award. They cited what the organization described as a recurring pattern of disparaging commentary about prominent Black women across politics, sports, and media. Stephen A. Smith did respond. He strongly pushed back responding via Fox News, which was an interesting choice, arguing that the criticism was politically and personally motivated, and saying essentially, this can't be true because I have a Black mother and Black sisters.

• 7:25Speaker 00

  So why, I guess, can it be so difficult to accept accountability? Even if you're a part of a particular group, to feel as though you're being criticized or feeling like, you know, you've hurt someone in that group? Why is it so hard to take accountability and apologize and move forward from these types of criticisms?

• 7:46Speaker 01

  I've not followed this story intently, though I have heard, and I also agree that him going on Fox News to kind of rebut this award is an interesting choice. And none of that means that you can't be anti-Black and anti-Black woman, right? Like, just because you have a mother and daughters, like, that doesn't mean anything. And I think accountability is difficult, especially depending on like how it has been asked for, right? And I think for a lot of us, we immediately become defensive when somebody calls out something that we've done wrong, right? Like, it doesn't feel good, especially if you have good intentions. Now, we don't know Stephen A. Smith's intentions. But you're not a mal-intent person, then usually there will be some like, ooh, what did I do there, right? Like, you kind of bristle when somebody kind of calls you to the carpet.

• 8:30Speaker 01

  And so I think these kinds of conversations and taking accountability is very difficult, depending on like how able you are to sit with your defenses. And I think in this case, because it was done publicly, it is probably more difficult for him to do that because we've not seen him be able to take accountability, even probably for things that have happened in private. So him being able to like take accountability for something that happened publicly is probably not going to be the way to do that. And I think that that is something for all of us to think about, right? Like, and it depends on the relationship that you have with the person who's trying to hold you accountable. And so when you think about like, oh, this is a conversation I need to have with a family member or a friend,

• 9:11Speaker 01

  I do think that having that conversation in private is more likely to get you further in that conversation or the person may be better able to hear it because it's not like a publicly shaming kind of thing. And so it feels like that's where some of the tension comes from here, is that it was done so publicly and he had done things with the organization, I guess, in the past. And so I think he was surprised, maybe, to see this and maybe felt like it could be handled differently.

• 9:39Speaker 00

  Yeah, absolutely. And I think like, to your point, this story is specific to Stephen A. Smith. And I think we all have interpersonal relationships and friendships and our relationships with our family that we have to navigate on a day-to-day basis. If someone were to approach us, it's not a public situation, they post aside and say, you know, hey, this XYZ that you did really hurt me. How do we kind of distinguish in those particular instances, I'm being unfairly criticized versus like, I'm just hearing something that I don't like? I just don't want to address it because it makes me uncomfortable.

• 10:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, and I think that that is where you have to kind of slow down, right? Because again, immediately your defenses are probably activated, like you wanting to protect yourself. It's not easy to hear like not good stuff about yourself, usually. And so slow down and just kind of sit with whether the thing happened or not. Like, maybe your intention was not to hurt this person or to criticize them, but their experience of whatever the interaction was resulted in them feeling hurt or criticized, right? So you and I may have very different versions of what we feel like happened, but if you left feeling hurt, even if that wasn't my intention, if I have a relationship with you, then a part of that responsibility is to hear that maybe I did something that did hurt you, even though that wasn't my intention.

• 11:01Speaker 01

  And I think we can only get to that by slowing down. So slowing down, hearing what the other person has to say, and then apologizing, even if you don't feel like you did it on purpose, right? Because it doesn't matter whether you did it on purpose if the impact was that this person felt criticized or hurt.

• 11:18Speaker 00

  For sure. Someone told me a while ago that you should go into conversations kind of like assuming good intent. And, you know, obviously, like, there's some people where it's like, okay. We've had these bad experiences in the past. Like, my guard is up, but like, for the most part, if it's someone that you love or you have a relationship with, whether it's family, friends, like romantic partner, just assume they have your best interests at heart and like want to continue the relationship too.

• 11:43Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 11:44Speaker 00

  Thank you.

• 11:45Speaker 01

  More from our conversation after the break. A rare disease diagnosis can change your life, but it doesn't have to define your future. Tune in for season seven of Untold Stories: Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition, a Ruby Studio production in partnership with Argenx. Hosted by public health and policy expert Dr. Martine Hackett, Untold Stories: Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition pushes the conversation within the rare disease community forward. Featuring guests living with MG, CIDP, myositis, SMA, and other rare autoimmune conditions, each episode explores hope, progress, and connection. How does research create new opportunities? How do shared experiences help light the way forward? How do we best show up for each other? Tune in to find out.

• 12:31Speaker 01

  Listen on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

• 12:38Speaker 03

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  I had this dream of being a musician, and everyone I had known was kind of like, you're not good at music, you know, you should probably have other things to back up, play and whatever. Felt like I didn't have anyone close to me, and my wife had flown out to visit, and she found out I was sleeping in a car. She didn't know. And she was like, let's do it. And she slept in a car with me. And for the first time in my life, I realized that in a life full of what I thought was things happening to me, something was finally happening for me.

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  Coolest thing ever.

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• 13:41Speaker 00

  And then for our last topic, let's talk about all the recalls. I feel like over the last few weeks, it seems like every food item in the world has just been recalled. First, it was lettuce, then it was blueberries and eggs and jalapenos and all of these other grocery staples. And it has led a lot of us to just kind of feel like, okay, we're constantly checking what's in the refrigerator, what's safe to eat, Googling, you know, has this been recalled? Are there any food safety alerts I need to be aware of? And the result is that for a lot of people, ordinary grocery shopping and basic human function, like eating, has started to feel like a very stressful situation to manage because you just don't know what's safe anymore.

• 14:26Speaker 00

  So what does happen to our nervous system when something that we do every day, like eating, starts to feel unpredictable and unsafe?

• 14:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, so this is me for sure.

• 14:37Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 14:37Speaker 01

  Right? Like, I can immediately feel like my blood pressure raising and like getting really activated when I see another thread or like an email or alert that says, oh, so-and-so is now recalled, right? But I think the speed and the pace at which this is coming is what is making it even more overwhelming, right? Because it very much feels like every day, there's a new thing that we have to be on the lookout for, and I don't think it helps. I know that it doesn't help that we don't have very much government structure in place more, where we can even like look at the CDC as a credible, like, are they even able to keep up with all of this? And would they even be allowed to give us the full information about all of this, right? Like, I think all of it is just questionable right now.

• 15:21Speaker 01

  And so it immediately puts you on high alert. It makes you question like, oh, my gosh, like, how am I going to feed myself? How am I going to feed my family, right? Like, it's just all these questions and this level of anxiety that increases when we see this is something that we don't have control over, right? And so I think it just adds to the stress and the anxiety that people are already experiencing just about life in general, when we now are having to expend so much bandwidth thinking about what we're going to eat and is this healthy or safe for me right now?

• 15:48Speaker 00

  Absolutely. And so how can we go about staying informed? Because obviously, we don't want to eat anything that's recalled or get sick or anything like that, but not becoming consumed by the fear and like the anxiety that is surrounding food right now?

• 16:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, so I will go back to one of our very common refrains here on the podcast in terms of making sure that you are moderating your media access and like not checking every hour for like a new recall, like that's not going to help you, it's just going to amp up, you know, your anxiety even more. So I would say maybe check in on the weekends, right? Like, if you do your grocery shopping on Fridays after work, like maybe check in on Friday morning or Thursday evening to plan your grocery list for the week so that you are not kind of constantly looking for new things. I have heard that, I think it is a Europe's version of the CDC, or there's some other country that manages like a list that is similar to what we could have recently expected our CDC to do. So looking to other countries and their communications for information, I think,

• 16:49Speaker 01

  could be a better gauge of like what is actually okay to do right now. I also think looking into local farmers markets and like things that are just more reliable, like in your immediate area. I've heard people have good experiences with, and you know, kind of like, okay, the berries came from this farm, or the vegetables came from this local place, and I know how they take care of the staff and the animals and whatever there. And so I think looking at local options are probably a really good idea to help to manage the anxiety and to put you in a better position to make sure that you're actually eating something that is actually safe for you to do. And just condensing your menu right now, right? Like, if there are only a couple of things that you feel comfortable eating, and you know, you can kind of manage it for the next couple of weeks or so,

• 17:34Speaker 01

  like, you might not be able to be very experimental with your palate right now because a lot of stuff feels unknown and scary. And so maybe looking at two or three options that you can kind of continue to rotate helps you to manage some of that bandwidth so that you don't have to be as anxious about where the food is coming from and is it safe?

• 17:52Speaker 00

  For sure. Better safe than sorry, and hopefully all of this gets smoothed over soon, so.

• 17:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, I've been relying very unreasonably on Uncrustables right now.

• 18:01Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 18:04Speaker 00

  I always, I'm allergic to peanut butter, but I was always so jealous of my brother and sister because they loved Uncrustables.

• 18:10Speaker 01

  I've heard that there's like an almond butter version now of Uncrustables.

• 18:14Speaker 00

  A resurgence?

• 18:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, so you might be able to find some.

• 18:17Speaker 00

  I love that. Well, thank you, Dr. Joy, that wraps up our topics for the week.

• 18:21Speaker 01

  Thank you, Rhea. Great topics as always. And if there is something that you'd like us to weigh in on, please share that with us at therapyforblackgirls.com/mailbox. And until next time, take good care of yourself.

• 18:39Speaker 01

  A rare disease diagnosis can change your life, but it doesn't have to define your future. In season seven of Untold Stories: Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition, host Martine Hackett continues the conversation with people living with MG, CIDP, and the broader rare disease community, exploring what comes after diagnosis through stories of hope, progress, and connection. Produced by Ruby Studio in partnership with Argenx. Listen on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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• 21:13Speaker 00

  This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human.