Pod Insights Therapy for Black Girls I Have Some Thoughts Minisode | NY Knicks, Michelle Obama, & Zahara Jolie About this episode Welcome back to our minisode series, "I Have Some Thoughts." These short episodes are designed to contextualize the pop culture moments we're currently paying attention to through a mental health lens. Pop culture isn't just fun to chat about, it can reveal important information about how we relate, cope, and understand ourselves. Join us each Friday to hear Dr. Joy share her thoughts about the happenings of the week.
This week, we're chatting about the NY Knicks winning the NBA Championship, a UFC Fighter making disparaging remarks about Michelle Obama, and Zahara Jolie changing her last name.
Resources
Listen to Session 462: Going No Contact https://omny.fm/shows/therapy-for-black-girls/session-462-going-no-contact
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Transcript 0:00 Speaker 00 This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed Human.
0:04 Speaker 01 A rare disease diagnosis can change your life, but it doesn't have to define your future. In season seven of Untold Stories, Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition, host Martine Hackett continues the conversation with people living with MG, CIDP, and the broader rare disease community, exploring what comes after diagnosis through stories of hope, progress, and connection. Produced by Ruby Studio in partnership with Argenx. Listen on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
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2:46 Speaker 05 Severe side effects may include inflamed pancreas or gallbladder problems. Tell your doctor if you experience vision changes before scheduled procedures with anesthesia, if you're nursing, pregnant, plant-to-be, or taking birth control pills. Taking Zepbound with a sulfonylurea or insulin may cause low blood sugar. Side effects include nausea, diarrhea, and vomiting, which can cause dehydration and worsen kidney problems.
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3:55 Speaker 01 Hey y'all, welcome back to I Have Some Thoughts, our therapy for black girls mini sold series where we are discussing all things pop culture, but of course through a mental health lens. And I am joined today by Bria again, who is our production assistant. Hey, Bria. Hi, everyone. What are we chatting about today, Bria? Yes, lots of topics to discuss today. First things
4:17 Speaker 00 First, we could not start without talking about the NBA Finals. First, did you watch and did you have a team you were rooting for?
4:26 Speaker 01 Of course I watched. Now, I do want to go on record. I have not been following the MNBA. Y'all know I'm a WNBA stan, so I only really got involved once we were down to like the last four teams. And y'all heard me talk about OKC because I love Jared McCain. So I was already rooting against the Spurs because they defeated OKC. But then the more I learned about the Knicks team and just how excited everybody has been, I definitely became a Knicks fan.
4:51 Speaker 00 No, the energy was honestly like contagious. I lived in New York for two years, so I don't claim New York. That's not where I'm from or anything like that, but I was rooting for them too. But if you were not familiar, they won in game five against the San Antonio Spurs, ninety-four to ninety. And this is their first NBA championship win in fifty-three years. So I'm sure you've seen all the videos, all over social media. The streets of New York are just crazy right now. The parade is on Thursday, but people have just been celebrating every day since. But I think it's a really cool concept of people get so emotionally invested in these teams and their cities. And the Knicks won the championship, but it's really the whole city of New York won.
5:31 Speaker 00 So what psychological needs are fulfilled by belonging to this community? By belonging to fandoms of certain sport teams and sharing in these wins and losses together?
5:42 Speaker 01 Oh, this is such a great question. And of course, like I have been observing all of this. As much as like the fun of it, also like it's a fascinating, I think, like psychological case study. Just like you said, like people have been in the streets for like weeks now, very excited and just lots of things going on. But one, I think you mentioned it, that the Knicks have not won a series in fifty-three years, right? And so what I have been observing, again, because I have not been following for years. How many people have stories about like their parents and grandparents ushering them into the fandom? Which I think is really cool, right? And so you don't necessarily see that kind of like lineage, I think, always in sports. And especially when the team has not won a championship in this way.
6:27 Speaker 01 So I think for a lot of people, there are like some really strong family ties, especially when the people who brought you into the fandom have passed away, right? And so I've also seen some beautiful stories of people talking about like how happy grandmother would be or uncle would be because the Knicks finally won, right? And so I think for a lot of people, there's a real sense of family history, like locked into this fandom that I think is a little different than maybe other kind of sports situations. I also think, when you think about like something like the finals, right? And like it's appointment TV, appointment viewing, right? So there are certain days and times that the games come on. There's all this planning that goes into like, okay, where am I going to watch it? Who am I going to be with? I think for a lot of people, there have probably been group chats and people that you haven't talked to in maybe years
7:12 Speaker 01 that you've now reconnected with around the Knicks being in the finals, right? And so I think a lot of it is related to the socializing and like the social impact of being able to get together to watch these things and socializing in ways that maybe you don't typically, right? Like usually we're going about our routine and there isn't this kind of thing to sustain our, you know, breaking up our routine. And so I think being able to watch the finals collectively and people were doing watch parties in the streets. And like, I think that the social impact of that cannot be denied and the impact that that has on our mental health, especially right now, right? When so many is so much, so many things are not going well. And there isn't a lot to look forward to.
7:54 Speaker 01 I think having the games to look forward to, having to look forward to socializing and connecting with other people, really just is a positive mental health impact that I hope we could stay connected to.
8:06 Speaker 00 For sure. My favorite was the man who just set up a projector outside of his apartment window and had like everyone watching it in the streets. I thought that was so cool.
8:14 Speaker 01 Yes.
8:14 Speaker 00 But then even when it comes to like people who have no ties to New York, have never been a Knicks fan, I really feel like it's some aspect of like. This redemption arc, you know, a team that hasn't won in 50 something years. So what is it about like the underdogs and like long awaited victories that really resonates with people? So deeply, especially people who aren't even connected to this team at all.
8:37 Speaker 01 Yeah, I mean, I think that there's something very powerful about rooting for the underdog, right? And the more you learn and the more I've learned about like just the story of the players, right? So Jalen Brunson being counted out all his life and told he was too small and he's never gonna like be able to lead a team to a championship. And then the history of him and Mikal Bridges and Josh Hart playing in Villanova together, right? Like all these really cool like stories that are a part of it. I think also they're very likeable.
9:04 Speaker 00 Yep.
9:04 Speaker 01 So I think it's easy to kind of root for people who come across as like humble and really excited and playing with a real sense of community and brotherhood. I think that that made it really easy to root for them. But I think we love a redemption arc, right? We love kind of being counted out and being the one who finally succeeds. And I think there are lots of lessons we can take that from that for our own lives, right? Like one of the things that Jalen Brunson talked about is his confidence really matching his work ethic, which I think is a lesson for us to kind of take away from that, right? Like the things that you work hard at, even if you're not successful, you're more likely to be successful when you're putting in those hours. And I think that there are just lots of lessons like that that we can take for our own lives, even if we're not NBA superstars.
9:48 Speaker 00 No, for sure. I love that. I, my team is the Dallas Mavericks, so I was rooting for Jalen Brunson. Cause he used to play for them. So I was like, okay, my team's not there, but I at least have an old player that's there.
9:59 Speaker 01 Exactly.
10:00 Speaker 00 So we're gonna stay on the topic of sports for our next topic, but unfortunately this one is a lot less celebratory. After winning the biggest fight of his career, UFC fighter Josh Hoykit used his moment to call former firstly, Michelle Obama and refer to her as a man. Now, the reaction from the crowd was mixed. It seems like half the crowd was really shocked and disheartened. But if you like, listen back to the recording and you can hear some cheers throughout too. I'm sure he thought he was going to get a different reaction, but then on Instagram later that day or the next day, he doubled down and was just like, I'm not here to be liked. I'm not here to be a role model. I don't care. I'm here to succeed.
10:39 Speaker 00 The UFC president and CEO Dana White has completely shut the statement down. She's said, called it nonsense, said that it's something that they don't really stand for, but at the same time, like, he is like their UFC champion and there's only really so much that they can do and it's, they're not really gonna like kick him out of the UFC, things like that. But I think it's just like a much broader conversation about why powerful black women are often denied this like sense of femininity and softness and humanity. I mean, we saw it during like the initial election during Obama's presidency, like there was so many moments where Michelle Obama was just kind of torn apart and I feel like the first thing that they went for was her femininity.
11:22 Speaker 01 There's such a long history of kind of stripping black women of femininity, right? Like the relationship between black women and femininity, I think, has been a tenuous one and not through our own doing, right? Like, everything goes back to racism, right? And so it, it to me is very kind of poignant that like in this moment where he's like won this big fight and like it should really be all about him and celebrating like his own kind of accomplishments that like what he thinks about is like Michelle Obama, right? Like, how much are we on your mind that like this moment about a black woman? But I think that educated black women, like powerful black women are definitely seen as a threat, especially at this moment in history, right? And you know, I think we can't escape like the background of the fight, right? Like the fight was at the White House on the lawn.
12:05 Speaker 01 And so the toxicity that has just been manifested and fostered by this administration, I think is that is a, this, what we saw is a direct reflection of just the sentiment that I think so many of his supporters tend to run with. And I'm surprised that he did not get a bigger reaction because I think probably the people at the fight are people who maybe even believe some of those things. But I do think that it really just speaks to the toxicity that is really prevalent in the culture right now. And just those historical ideas of black women not being able to be feminine and being dehumanized and othered in lots of ways that have been really harmful and distasteful.
12:42 Speaker 00 No, for sure. I feel like there's so many people within like Trump's supporting community that just feel so Emboldened and empowered to say so many things out loud that is just kind of like what's happening.
12:53 Speaker 01 Right.
12:54 Speaker 00 And then what does it look like for Black women who are kind of under this microscope? How do they maintain like a sense of self-worth when they're constantly being judged through someone else's lens? Especially people who might not align with them or support them too.
13:09 Speaker 01 So many of us have had these conversations since we were young, right? And so I think there's something really powerful, though unfortunate about how we have to raise young Black people and how we have been raised to kind of really avoid the gaze of other people and really seek definition from within ourselves and from within our community. And so I think for a lot of us and for a lot of Black women, I think that your sense of self-worth has to come from places that are not outside of you. It has to come from you and your intrinsic values and the things that you are excited about and the things that you are good at, the things that you feel confident about. But that's not to say that this doesn't impact us, right?
13:50 Speaker 01 Like, I definitely saw lots of sisters coming out, of course, in support of Michelle, right? And so I think these kinds of things, even when they don't happen to us, still can impact us, right? Because we have also probably had experiences, maybe not as high-profile, but people kind of chipping away at us or making us feel bad or making fun of us and like pointing to us in moments that have nothing to do with us, right? And so I think many of us can identify with that. But then, you know, it goes back to the Toni Morrison quote of the real impact of racism being kind of constantly having to negate why this thing is not true, right? And so I think so much of our energy then becomes around like having to deal with races as opposed to just living our own lives.
14:34 Speaker 01 And so as much as I think self-worth has to come from you and the things that are important to you, I do think that there is a mental health impact when we see things like this happen.
14:43 Speaker 00 For sure. Totally agree.
14:46 Speaker 01 More from our conversation after the break. A rare disease diagnosis can change your life, but it doesn't have to define your future. Tune in for season seven of Untold Stories: Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition, a Ruby Studio production in partnership with Argenx. Hosted by public health and policy expert Dr. Martine Hackett, Untold Stories: Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition pushes the conversation within the rare disease community forward. Featuring guests living with MG, CIDP, myositis, SMA, and other rare autoimmune conditions, each episode explores hope, progress, and connection. How does research create new opportunities? How do shared experiences help light the way forward? How do we best show up for each other? Tune in to find out.
15:31 Speaker 01 Listen on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
15:38 Speaker 04 Snoring, gasping for air during sleep, daytime sleepiness? I'm Shaquille O'Neal, and this shouldn't be anybody's experience. Ask your doctor about Zepbound Trisepotide, the first and only FDA-approved prescription medicine for moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea in adults with obesity.
15:54 Speaker 05 Zepbound is a prescription medicine used with a reduced calorie diet and increased physical activity to help adults with moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, OSA, and obesity to improve their OSA. Zepbound is approved as a 2.5, 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, or 15-milligram injection. Zepbound contains trisepotide and should not be used with other trisepotide-containing products or any GLP-1 receptor agonist medicines. It is not known if Zepbound is safe and effective for use in children. Don't cheer needles or pens, or reuse needles. Don't take if allergic to it, or if you or someone in your family had medullary thyroid cancer, or if you've had multiple endocrine neoplasia syndrome type 2. Tell your doctor if you get a lump or swelling in your neck. Stop Zepbound and call your doctor if you have severe stomach pain or a serious allergic reaction.
16:39 Speaker 05 Severe side effects may include inflamed pancreas or gallbladder problems. Tell your doctor if you experience vision changes before scheduled procedures with anesthesia. If you're nursing, pregnant, plant-to-be, or taking birth control pills. Taking Zepbound with a sulphonal urea or insulin may cause low blood sugar. Side effects include nausea, diarrhea, and vomiting, which can cause dehydration and worsen kidney problems.
17:01 Speaker 04 Talk to your doctor. Call 1-800-545-5979 or visit zepbound.lily.com.
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17:50 Speaker 01 Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and the Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa USA, Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton Prepaid Card, Sutton Debit Flex Card, and Bancorp Debit Flex Card. Discounts and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block Incorporated brand. Visit cashapp/legal/podcast for full disclosures. Host Nora McInerney is back for an all-new season of The Head Start, embracing the journey brought to you in partnership with AbbVie. In each episode, Nora has honest conversations with real people living with chronic migraine, people who are figuring out how to adapt, advocate,
18:33 Speaker 01 and stay connected to the things that bring them joy. This season, she's revisiting familiar voices and introducing new ones who will share their stories about what it means to live with this condition. From the missed moments to the strategies that help them keep going when things feel uncertain. As always, she'll be joined by headache specialist Dr. Christopher Rhine, who offers insight into these challenges and the questions many of us have. If you're new to the podcast, check out the three previous seasons, each one offering a different perspective on this condition and the theme of resilience displayed while navigating it. So don't miss season four of The Head Start: Embracing the Journey. Listen on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
19:18 Speaker 00 And then for our last topic, we're going to talk about Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's daughter Zahara. So she has officially filed to have the Pitt from her last name removed, so she would go by Zahara Jolie Pitt. She actually had the Pitt part removed. You may remember a few years ago, an FBI report came out and it had a bunch of details about a violent altercation that took place on a private plane back in 2016 between Brad Pitt and Angelina. The details were pretty heavy. There was a lot of physical and verbal abuse from Brad Pitt all throughout. But Zahara was actually their third child to drop the Pitt from the last name. Maddox did so just a few days before Zahara did, and then Shiloh did last year as well.
20:02 Speaker 00 And I think there's like a much broader conversation about when you don't align with certain parts of your familial identity, or you do need to sever those relationships and those ties. So how do people navigate the emotional complexity of creating distance from a parent that you may still love, you may still like care for, but they have disappointed you, they have hurt you, and so now you're still processing love, disappointment, grief, all at the same time?
20:30 Speaker 01 Mm-hmm. You know, I immediately think of our conversation a couple of weeks ago with Dr. Natalie Jones about going no contact with family, right? And how this is often a very difficult decision for people to make for lots of different reasons, right? Like so much of our society talks about honoring our parents and they can do no wrong, and you know, like we really just need to kind of be in reverence to them. But the sad and unfortunate truth is that sometimes our parents are some of the most toxic people we encounter, at least for the first time, right? And so I think it does often become a very difficult decision to maybe break ties, even if there is still love, even if you still feel fortunate that they've taken care of you, even though that's what parents are supposed to do, right? It's a very complicated kind of decision, and so it's not one that people may take
21:13 Speaker 01 lightly or make easily. And so I think going no contact, but then also making this extra step of like, I'm changing my name. Like, I really want some separation here. I want it to be a public declaration that I am claiming this for myself. That I do not want to have this kind of relationship with you. And I think that that's a really brave and bold step. Now, many of us in kind of regular life, people don't know, like, there has not been an FBI investigation into the things that have happened. And people don't know all of the reasons why you might. But I would imagine that they probably have also faced some scrutiny around like, oh, that's your father. And maybe even because they, you know, well, at least a couple of them have been adopted, right? Like, oh, don't you feel fortunate that they kind of saved you, so to speak?
21:59 Speaker 00 Yeah.
21:59 Speaker 01 You know, so I'm sure that they've also faced some scrutiny, but also made the decision to take care of themselves and to choose themselves in this moment. And I think that that's a very powerful lesson.
22:08 Speaker 00 No, for sure. And to your point about like, everyone's not under this celebrity public eye aspect of it. There's also like, very normal, regular people that are dealing with these complicated family dynamics. Some people, you know, may not feel as empowered or may not feel it's necessary to make that step. But how can they honor their own wellbeing while navigating these family dynamics and setting those boundaries that way?
22:34 Speaker 01 Mm hmm. Yeah, I mean, I would go back to this conversation with Dr. Jones. We'll definitely have to link that one in the show notes because I think that would be a great one for people to check out. You know, but I think it is around setting boundaries, right? Whether it is fully going no contact and really severing ties to this person or much more limited contact, right? So I maybe see you for holidays and we have brief conversation, but there's no kind of daily keeping you up to date with what's going on in my life. I'm not expecting birthday presents and you should not expect the same for me. Like, I think it really is about what is your comfort level of setting boundaries? But also, I think getting support from people who understand why you made that decision. Because like I said, I think there can be a lot of judgment around like, oh, my gosh, how could you cut off your father kind of thing?
23:20 Speaker 01 Without people knowing the full story and without people knowing like, what it took for you to actually make that decision. And so you definitely want to be surrounded by supportive people who support you in making that decision, who don't question you. Who don't say, oh, do you just want to, you know, reach out for Father's Day or, you know, like that kind of thing? Like, so whether that is from friends and family or whether that's a therapist, I think that that's one of the most important things is having a supportive community who does not question your decision and who really can back you in making that really difficult decision.
23:52 Speaker 00 For sure. No, I love that. And I, obviously, we see it from a distance, but I do appreciate the relationship that it seems Angelina and Zahar have, like, from videos that we've seen from graduations and from when Zahar became an AK a couple of years ago, too. So I hope that she's feeling all the love and support, too. But that was our last topic for the week.
24:13 Speaker 01 Perfect. Great topics, Ria. Thank you so much for sharing those. And if there are things that you are talking about or thinking about in pop culture that you'd like to hear us weigh in on, please send those suggestions to us at therapyforblackgirls.com/mailbox. And until next time, take good care of yourself.
24:28 Speaker 00 I guess.
24:36 Speaker 01 A rare disease diagnosis can change your life, but it doesn't have to define your future. In season seven of Untold Stories: Life with a Severe Autoimmune Condition, host Martine Hackett continues the conversation with people living with MG, CIDP, and the broader rare disease community, exploring what comes after diagnosis through stories of hope, progress, and connection. Produced by Ruby Studio in partnership with Argenx. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
25:06 Speaker 05 Snoring, gasping for air during sleep, daytime sleepiness? I'm Shaquille O'Neal, and this shouldn't be anybody's experience. Ask your doctor about Zepbound trisepotide, the first and only FDA-approved prescription medicine for moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea in adults with obesity. Zepbound is a prescription medicine used with a reduced-calorie diet and increased physical activity to help adults with moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, OSA, and obesity to improve their OSA. Zepbound is approved as a 2.5, 5, 7.5, 10, 12.5, or 15-milligram injection. Zepbound contains trisepotide and should not be used with other trisepotide-containing products or any GLP-1 receptor-agonist medicines. It is not known if Zepbound is safe and effective for use in children. Don't share needles
25:51 Speaker 05 or pens, or reuse needles. Don't take if allergic to it, or if you or someone in your family had medullary thyroid cancer, or if you've had multiple endocrine neoplasia syndrome type 2. Tell your doctor if you get a lump or swelling in your neck. Stop Zepbound and call your doctor if you have severe stomach pain or a serious allergic reaction. Severe side effects may include inflamed pancreas or gallbladder problems. Tell your doctor if you experience vision changes before scheduled procedures with anesthesia. If you're nursing, pregnant, plant to be, or taking birth control pills. Taking Zepbound with a sulphonal urea or insulin may cause low blood sugar. Side effects include nausea, diarrhea, and vomiting, which can cause dehydration and worsen kidney problems.
26:30 Speaker 04 Talk to your doctor. Call 1-800-545-5979 or visit zepbound.lily.com.
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