Shanthi Teaches Romesh How To Interview

How would Shanthi take on a thousand seagulls? We're back with another Thursday episode, answering your important listener questions like, would you rather take on a dog sized spider or a pack of seagulls? The pair discuss Parents Evening and advise your latest listener dilemmas, from a curry-addicted dog, to Shanthi's weaponised use of cake. Plus, Shanthi and the team give some feedback on Romesh's interviewing technique and discuss what would we do if Shanthi quit? A Ranga Bee Production in partnership with Platform. Chapter 00:00 Intro 04:40 Is Shanthi happy? 06:30 On Gabby Logan 07:14 A new interview style 15:51 On Parents Evening 17:57 A listener question 25:30 A curry addicted dog dilemma 28:15 Is Shanthi quitting? 28:56 Advice on the dog dilemma 32:41 A mundane chat conundrum 39:49 Outro Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Smell a gooch, it's the Thursday edition of the Romesh Ranganathan show. Is that complaint?

• 0:11Speaker 01

  That's complaints.

• 0:12Speaker 00

  Why, do they not like it? Is it too?

• 0:13Speaker 01

  They don't like it.

• 0:14Speaker 00

  They don't like it when I go too big on the intro?

• 0:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:18Speaker 02

  But the gooch bit's alright?

• 0:19Speaker 01

  Gooch bit's fine, yeah.

• 0:20Speaker 00

  It's the shouty bit. This is the show where we just, shall I do it more quiet? Shall we try it as an option?

• 0:25Speaker 02

  Do it for-

• 0:26Speaker 03

  Just welcome them.

• 0:27Speaker 02

  Same duration, just less volume.

• 0:28Speaker 00

  They should have technology where like, you can choose like, full beans intro, no beans intro.

• 0:37Speaker 00

  Hello and welcome to what we call the Thursday edition of the Romesh Ranganathan show. Suck a dick! So that was gentle and then-

• 0:46Speaker 01

  Yes, yes, yeah, that makes sense.

• 0:48Speaker 00

  This is the show where we discuss Monday's episode and tackle your questions and dilemmas. I'm joined as ever by everyone's favourite, Shanthi Ranganathan. Mum, nice fit, congratulations.

• 0:58Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 1:00Speaker 00

  I always get worried about my seating position. Do you get nervous about your seating position?

• 1:04Speaker 03

  No, no, when you are with me, I don't get nervous, I don't know why.

• 1:08Speaker 00

  That's good.

• 1:09Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:09Speaker 00

  Nails, can we see the nails? Beautiful. How often are you getting your nails done, Mum?

• 1:17Speaker 03

  Every time I have the gap here, it's hard to grow too long.

• 1:21Speaker 00

  Mum, where do you get it done?

• 1:25Speaker 03

  One of the shops in Crawley.

• 1:26Speaker 00

  One of the shops in Crawley?

• 1:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, shops in Crawley.

• 1:29Speaker 00

  And are those gels?

• 1:31Speaker 03

  They are actually infill, they call it.

• 1:35Speaker 00

  Infill?

• 1:36Speaker 03

  Infill, yeah, infill, yeah.

• 1:38Speaker 00

  Is that not gels then? Do you have to put your hand in the lamp?

• 1:42Speaker 03

  Yeah, I do, I do, I do, yeah. So I ask them for the shape I like.

• 1:49Speaker 00

  And what shape is that?

• 1:50Speaker 03

  There's so many, this is almond shape.

• 1:52Speaker 00

  I thought so.

• 1:52Speaker 03

  They have a coffin shape.

• 1:54Speaker 00

  Right.

• 1:54Speaker 03

  They have a square shape.

• 1:56Speaker 00

  What are you, what are you looking so?

• 1:59Speaker 00

  Because of my nail knowledge? I actually didn't know, I just guessed because they are actually almond shapes. I didn't know there was such, I didn't know you could get different shapes. Coffin shape?

• 2:07Speaker 03

  Coffin shape, comes up like that and the top will be flat.

• 2:12Speaker 00

  Like a coffin, yeah.

• 2:13Speaker 03

  It's like coffee.

• 2:14Speaker 00

  What other shapes can you get?

• 2:15Speaker 03

  So many, I think nine or 10 they have.

• 2:18Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, but you have to think about it.

• 2:20Speaker 00

  I'm very old school, I only believe there's any, there's only two nail shapes.

• 2:23Speaker 03

  What's that?

• 2:23Speaker 00

  Am I right?

• 2:27Speaker 00

  I, do you reckon I could, I could pull off those nail colors?

• 2:32Speaker 03

  The colors?

• 2:33Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 2:34Speaker 03

  Yes, you will.

• 2:34Speaker 00

  If I got multicoloured. You've actually been, I thought you might, you know, when I started getting my nails done, I thought you'd be a bit anti me doing it.

• 2:41Speaker 03

  No.

• 2:41Speaker 00

  But you've been very surprising reaction.

• 2:44Speaker 03

  Somebody try something and it looked good on them.

• 2:48Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, got you.

• 2:48Speaker 03

  I really like that. Yeah, I never say no. You, you really look good.

• 2:54Speaker 00

  Right.

• 2:55Speaker 03

  I want my boys to be smart.

• 2:57Speaker 00

  Yeah. And do you get a lot of compliments for how you look on the podcast?

• 3:01Speaker 03

  Yeah, I do. I do. I read every, every, everything, the comments, uh, and some, one of the.

• 3:10Speaker 00

  You're mirroring me. Did you notice that? I crossed my legs and then you crossed your legs almost immediately. What do you think? What does that mean? What is that a sign of?

• 3:18Speaker 03

  It's a.

• 3:19Speaker 00

  What is that a sign of when somebody mirrors you like that? Isn't that respect? Isn't that, she's obsessed with me or something?

• 3:25Speaker 00

  Isn't that what it means?

• 3:25Speaker 01

  It's, it's, it's one of the.

• 3:27Speaker 00

  Signs of.

• 3:29Speaker 01

  Endearing yourself to someone.

• 3:30Speaker 00

  Oh, okay. You're trying to get me to like you.

• 3:33Speaker 02

  But didn't you do it after?

• 3:34Speaker 00

  No. I, um, I don't think I did. Can we, Will, can we?

• 3:39Speaker 02

  Rewind.

• 3:40Speaker 00

  All right. But I mean, we won't get the results during this. Yeah, so.

• 3:44Speaker 02

  Shall we do both versions?

• 3:46Speaker 00

  What do you mean?

• 3:46Speaker 02

  So you do it where it's you.

• 3:48Speaker 00

  Okay, fine. Let's do it. All right.

• 3:50Speaker 03

  Do I read every, every, everything, the comments?

• 3:55Speaker 00

  Bloody hell, Mum, you must want me to find you really endearing because I crossed my legs and you crossed yours immediately.

• 4:01Speaker 03

  Why not?

• 4:01Speaker 02

  That's perfect.

• 4:03Speaker 03

  Every, everything, the comments.

• 4:07Speaker 00

  Bloody hell, Mum, I think I must really want you to find me endearing because you crossed your legs and I crossed mine straight afterwards. There you go. So you've got both, got both options. I would love it if this podcast, we could make this, same thing with the intro, choose your own adventure.

• 4:35Speaker 03

  With me, Shanthi.

• 4:37Speaker 00

  How are you this week, Mum? How's life treating you?

• 4:39Speaker 03

  I'm fine, life is treating me well.

• 4:41Speaker 00

  How happy are you on a scale of one to 10?

• 4:43Speaker 03

  10 out of 10.

• 4:44Speaker 00

  Really?

• 4:45Speaker 03

  10 out of... I told you, I change myself. I'm learning to keep my heart happy.

• 4:51Speaker 00

  Good.

• 4:52Speaker 03

  So more and more, you are sulking and sitting down and like that horrible face. You are not going to go anywhere. Be happy, enjoy.

• 5:04Speaker 00

  Are you doing an impression of my... in a monologue?

• 5:07Speaker 03

  Listen, my son, my son!

• 5:09Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 5:10Speaker 03

  You are here?

• 5:12Speaker 00

  Yeah, I think so, yeah.

• 5:13Speaker 03

  Okay. Right. Listen to your heart, darling, in the morning. What it says, obey. That's all you have to do.

• 5:20Speaker 00

  Obey your heart.

• 5:20Speaker 03

  Everything will fall into place.

• 5:22Speaker 00

  Where did you read that? Because you've been doing a lot of this heart chat recently.

• 5:25Speaker 03

  A spiritual book.

• 5:26Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 5:26Speaker 03

  I read and pick up the nice things and I follow it up.

• 5:33Speaker 00

  Good. I'm glad.

• 5:35Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 5:35Speaker 00

  And so that's made you happy?

• 5:36Speaker 03

  Very happy.

• 5:37Speaker 00

  And we've been having some nice phone calls, haven't we?

• 5:40Speaker 03

  Yes, yeah.

• 5:41Speaker 00

  It's been going very well, hasn't it?

• 5:42Speaker 03

  My God, what a different... You know why?

• 5:45Speaker 00

  Why?

• 5:45Speaker 03

  I give you, "Good morning, my son. Have a wonderful day." Every morning at 7, I send you. Since then, you have changed. You have changed. "Hello, Mum, how are you? God bless you, Mum." And things like that. I started it.

• 6:01Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 6:02Speaker 03

  That motivate you, the my message.

• 6:05Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 6:06Speaker 03

  And give you happiness in your heart.

• 6:07Speaker 00

  Shall I do an impression of when I see you?

• 6:15Speaker 00

  That's what happens to me every morning.

• 6:17Speaker 03

  I don't think so. Bichar sent me another message.

• 6:24Speaker 03

  Okay, okay, I'm not saying the animal.

• 6:26Speaker 00

  Why?

• 6:27Speaker 03

  I'm only joking.

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• 7:59Speaker 00

  Uh, no, Mum, we had Gabby Logan on Monday's show. Gabby Logan. She was on Parents' Evening, do you remember?

• 8:06Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 8:08Speaker 00

  What was the thing? It was like, theme park rides, wasn't it? And then one of them was, I swear, one of them was like a sexual. You're about to see, I think. Oh, we're about to see it? Okay, great. You were great on Parents' Evening, by the way. Thank you so much.

• 8:22Speaker 06

  Great, as much as Lois and I managed to win the money for charity, that was good. But, um, but you sit there going.

• 8:26Speaker 00

  Why do I look so bored?

• 8:27Speaker 06

  Not so much. This bit not, you know.

• 8:29Speaker 00

  Really?

• 8:29Speaker 06

  Because you kind of know what, you know, what is going to make the edit in the end. Which is, of course, Lois, I would have no idea, you know, as a 20 year old who's never been on TV before. So I'd be thinking, she'd be saying something, I'm thinking, oh, be quiet.

• 8:44Speaker 02

  Have you not ever seen, watched any of the interviews back? That's how you sit.

• 8:48Speaker 00

  For every interview, I sit like that.

• 8:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 8:50Speaker 02

  Yeah. Mostly we edit around it.

• 8:54Speaker 00

  Fuck. Have anyb- It just looks so, I look so, can we just re, can we go back? Can we just? That, there, obviously.

• 9:02Speaker 02

  The problem is, can I genuinely tell you what it is?

• 9:05Speaker 00

  Look at that. Look, look at that. That's me.

• 9:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 9:10Speaker 00

  Interviewing somebody, trying to show interest in what they're saying.

• 9:13Speaker 02

  The problem is, is your engaged face looks like you're dead inside.

• 9:16Speaker 00

  Right.

• 9:17Speaker 02

  That is a, an issue.

• 9:18Speaker 01

  You should try mirroring them.

• 9:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 9:22Speaker 00

  Cause you've seen that face a, a lot in meetings, haven't you?

• 9:25Speaker 03

  Most of the time, when I, when I talk to you, you are like that.

• 9:28Speaker 00

  I'm like that?

• 9:30Speaker 02

  But I think that's your go-to, you've got sort of-

• 9:31Speaker 00

  That's bad though, man. How's this podcast doing?

• 9:34Speaker 03

  You're bored.

• 9:36Speaker 00

  That's, I'm not bored, I'm genuinely, but look, you look at that.

• 9:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 9:40Speaker 00

  That is, that's bad. Well, how shall I, oh, let's, let's try and workshop this now.

• 9:48Speaker 02

  We probably should have done it before we started the podcast, but um, I did, but.

• 9:51Speaker 00

  How about this?

• 9:53Speaker 02

  That's better.

• 9:54Speaker 00

  Is that better?

• 9:55Speaker 02

  Should I try that from now?

• 9:56Speaker 03

  Oh, you can see it like that. Oh, yeah.

• 9:58Speaker 02

  Also try to hear, positive nods. Maybe also act genuinely like surprised, like, oh wow, that's interesting face. Show me that's interesting.

• 10:06Speaker 03

  Yeah. Yeah, that's good.

• 10:09Speaker 02

  Shanthi, tell Rom a story and let Rom just react, so maybe just-

• 10:13Speaker 00

  Okay, so this is like a practising, being a better interviewer.

• 10:16Speaker 02

  You should ask a question, sound genuinely like you want to know the answer. And then also you could try just a gen, a follow-up question of-

• 10:23Speaker 00

  Okay, sure. Mum, how was your journey into the podcast today?

• 10:27Speaker 03

  It's really good, really good. That's a bit too much. It's a bit, why? Why are you shaking your head like that? And the mouth? You look like a frog.

• 10:40Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 10:41Speaker 03

  Don't do that.

• 10:42Speaker 00

  Okay. And why do you think I look like a frog? That was my full-up question.

• 10:46Speaker 02

  Okay. You've got distracted from the woman, you should have followed up on the original story, because she never gave you a full answer.

• 10:52Speaker 00

  Oh yeah, how did you get here?

• 10:53Speaker 03

  How did I get here?

• 10:54Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 10:55Speaker 03

  My car.

• 10:55Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 10:58Speaker 00

  We all, we all use cars, that we all the time.

• 11:02Speaker 02

  That's sort of, that sort of dismisses the story and makes it seem like it's not that interesting.

• 11:07Speaker 00

  I'm being relatable.

• 11:08Speaker 07

  Well, that's a statement.

• 11:09Speaker 02

  That's a statement. You need to follow with a question.

• 11:11Speaker 00

  Okay. Um, would you say cars are your favourite type of transport?

• 11:17Speaker 03

  I don't mind a helicopter.

• 11:20Speaker 00

  Was not expecting you to say that.

• 11:22Speaker 02

  Great.

• 11:22Speaker 03

  Because.

• 11:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's really good. Keep going, keep going.

• 11:25Speaker 00

  Oh, keep going.

• 11:26Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 11:26Speaker 00

  Uh, when's the last time you got a helicopter?

• 11:29Speaker 03

  In California. We're not, we're not.

• 11:40Speaker 03

  This is horrible, mate. Stop it.

• 11:44Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 11:45Speaker 03

  This is exaggerated.

• 11:46Speaker 02

  I think, I think you've now got distracted by going, oh, a lot. And you forgot, she's told you that she's flown a helicopter in California.

• 11:55Speaker 00

  Oh, in, in California?

• 11:56Speaker 03

  California, yeah.

• 11:57Speaker 00

  What, what were the circumstances around that?

• 11:59Speaker 03

  Ben and them, they arranged the two, to flare, fly around Trump's golden, that something building.

• 12:10Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 12:11Speaker 03

  That's the one.

• 12:11Speaker 00

  Yeah, good. That's very fascinating.

• 12:13Speaker 03

  I enjoyed the ride.

• 12:15Speaker 00

  Would you go on a helicopter again then, do you think?

• 12:17Speaker 03

  Yeah, when you buy one.

• 12:18Speaker 00

  Oh. Okay.

• 12:24Speaker 00

  What do we think?

• 12:25Speaker 07

  That's brilliant.

• 12:26Speaker 00

  Better?

• 12:26Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 12:27Speaker 00

  Yeah?

• 12:27Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 12:28Speaker 00

  Um, I don't know if I'd have the guts to do that with an actual guest.

• 12:34Speaker 03

  I'm not a guest. Who the hell am I?

• 12:36Speaker 00

  Well, you're part of the show, aren't you?

• 12:37Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 12:38Speaker 07

  But you can take elements of it.

• 12:39Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 12:39Speaker 02

  You can only do less of the, oh.

• 12:41Speaker 00

  Yeah, sure.

• 12:42Speaker 02

  So if I was going to choose, I don't want to give any, you know, and know it.

• 12:45Speaker 00

  So is how I've been sitting and looking, has it been something you've discussed?

• 12:49Speaker 03

  This is like this, man. Leave me.

• 12:52Speaker 02

  What do you mean by disgust?

• 12:53Speaker 00

  As in like, it's a problem. Cause I think that's, I think that's an issue.

• 12:58Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 12:59Speaker 00

  To be honest.

• 13:00Speaker 02

  The problem is, is we've only got two, like, sorry, we've got four cameras.

• 13:03Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 13:04Speaker 02

  But it's quite.

• 13:05Speaker 00

  It's quite difficult to, to, what angle makes that look interesting?

• 13:11Speaker 00

  I don't even think a behind shot would make that less interesting.

• 13:15Speaker 02

  Sometimes try and crop really tight before you've got your hand there, it might not.

• 13:18Speaker 00

  No, it's not.

• 13:19Speaker 02

  So even that, if you're pushing your cheek.

• 13:21Speaker 00

  I don't, and also, John, by the way, I don't, I don't know if we got this, but John had to tell me to stop touching the top part of the microphone. So, so basically, I am fucking up.

• 13:34Speaker 00

  Both the audio and the vision on this podcast. It, it is a, it is a miracle that we were even able to do this at this step.

• 13:43Speaker 02

  Do you want, and I, I seriously, like, I wanna.

• 13:46Speaker 00

  Try and, you.

• 13:47Speaker 02

  I know, I don't, I don't wanna knock your confidence.

• 13:49Speaker 00

  Feel the laughter sort of coming out.

• 13:50Speaker 02

  No, no, no, no. Like, you've got, I think you've got so much better as this has gone on.

• 13:57Speaker 02

  That's not a joke.

• 13:58Speaker 00

  Right, thank you.

• 13:59Speaker 02

  I genuinely, and actually, aren't we getting lots of comments now of people saying what a great interviewer you are? So I think, you know, there are things you could work on.

• 14:06Speaker 00

  Okay. You know what's.

• 14:08Speaker 02

  There are more than we've talked.

• 14:08Speaker 00

  Do you know what's really sad? Is when somebody has to say that, that's when you know you're shit. That like, when, when people rinse you, yeah, okay, fine. When somebody goes, actually, you're doing really well, that's when you know you're the little engine that could. That, that is when you know they actually have to give you a pep talk. That's, that's one of the saddest things that I've experienced since doing this podcast.

• 14:34Speaker 02

  Shanthi, he's, he's good at, he's good at interviewing, isn't he?

• 14:37Speaker 03

  Listen, I, I watch all your program. Listen. The way you interact with people, interview them, oh, fuck.

• 14:46Speaker 00

  Yeah, the way I interview them, yeah.

• 14:47Speaker 03

  Yeah, and the way you stand, I love it. I love it.

• 14:51Speaker 00

  Thank you, okay.

• 14:52Speaker 03

  I really do like it, especially on, uh, Weaker's Link.

• 14:58Speaker 00

  Right. Was that, would you say that's your favorite of my?

• 15:02Speaker 03

  No.

• 15:02Speaker 00

  Of my, the two game shows that I host?

• 15:07Speaker 00

  Because it's Weakest Link and then there's the other one.

• 15:09Speaker 03

  What's the other one?

• 15:10Speaker 00

  What's the other one? What's the other one? What's the other show apart from Weakest Link? Where I ask questions? There we go.

• 15:19Speaker 03

  Parents Evening?

• 15:20Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 15:20Speaker 03

  Your shoulders were straight. I don't know whether the suit is tight or it's holding it back.

• 15:26Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 15:27Speaker 03

  Or I really admire, I was thinking as a mother, oh, he could do modeling.

• 15:32Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 15:33Speaker 03

  You look good.

• 15:33Speaker 00

  That sentence leans heavily on as a mother. Uh, okay. Well, thank you so much for this therapy session. Um, but Gabby Logan was good on Parents Evening. I didn't expect it to descend quite into what happened there. Uh, I, I wasn't hoping for some nightmare fuel for tonight, but we've got some. Got two canisters full. Uh, so that's something for me to stay awake about tonight. And now I, I can't, I've got to sit like this for the rest of the episode.

• 16:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:03Speaker 00

  Does this look natural?

• 16:04Speaker 02

  I think genuinely try for that, just those positive affirmations. Just try it for the rest of this episode, see how it feels.

• 16:10Speaker 03

  Listen, lift your shoulders. Lift your arms like that. This is going to your neck. You don't have a neck or a... Listen, then tighten it like that. Jesus Christ. That's not the way to do it.

• 16:25Speaker 00

  How, what am I doing?

• 16:25Speaker 03

  Lift your shoulders like that.

• 16:26Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 16:27Speaker 03

  Pull it down. This is like necklace.

• 16:30Speaker 00

  I'm doing the same as you. Mum, I've got a neck. Put your shoulders up. What, where the fuck is my neck supposed to go?

• 16:39Speaker 00

  I'm not fucking Mecha neck from He-Man. I, I, this is, this is as long as the neck goes.

• 16:44Speaker 03

  What you are doing, listen, listen. Romy.

• 16:48Speaker 00

  Yeah, go on.

• 16:49Speaker 03

  What you are doing, this.

• 16:51Speaker 00

  Okay. So what am I supposed to do?

• 16:52Speaker 03

  This one goes up.

• 16:54Speaker 00

  Oh yeah, you've got loads of neck. You're like a fucking giraffe. I, I don't know how you think you look. Your neck is also disappointing.

• 17:07Speaker 03

  Anyway.

• 17:08Speaker 00

  Anyway. Anyway. Okay. I'm going to try and be a bit more.

• 17:12Speaker 03

  More.

• 17:12Speaker 02

  Audience.

• 17:13Speaker 00

  Okay, time.

• 17:15Speaker 01

  Do you want to do it? Well, I saw like, we did start the clip, but then we didn't get to the point that I think Gabby was getting to.

• 17:21Speaker 00

  Yeah, let's see, let's see the point that Gabby was getting to.

• 17:23Speaker 02

  That clip about the, um, reverse cow.

• 17:26Speaker 00

  Reverse cowgirl.

• 17:30Speaker 06

  It was, see, that's one of those moments where I thought on the night, I thought, I know what this will end up being.

• 17:38Speaker 00

  Reverse cowgirl, Mum, have you heard of it?

• 17:40Speaker 03

  No.

• 17:41Speaker 00

  Hmm. It's a sexual position.

• 17:44Speaker 03

  Why is she talking about sexual position?

• 17:46Speaker 00

  Because in Parents Evening, there was like named, was it rides at a theme park?

• 17:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:51Speaker 00

  And one of them was reverse cowgirl. So they had to figure out if that was a ride name or not. And in a way it is. And I've got great news, Mum. Parents Evening is back, baby. Series three, you can catch up on ITVX if you missed the first two series, but series three will be out very, very soon.

• 18:09Speaker 00

  Can't confirm hosts yet, can we?

• 18:13Speaker 03

  No.

• 18:14Speaker 00

  What was that you did with your face?

• 18:15Speaker 02

  Shanthi, have you heard the other news?

• 18:17Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 18:17Speaker 00

  What's the other news?

• 18:17Speaker 02

  I think we can, I think we can announce that there's going to be a Spanish version of Parents Evening. And an Australian version of Parents Evening.

• 18:25Speaker 03

  My god.

• 18:27Speaker 02

  How's your Spanish?

• 18:27Speaker 00

  Off the back of the Australia special. We're hosting. And they've said that can we do it like the locals?

• 18:35Speaker 00

  Hi, mate, welcome to Parents Evening. Here's my mum.

• 18:38Speaker 03

  Shanthi.

• 18:39Speaker 00

  Good. And then the Spanish one. Uh, bienvenidos. Uh. What the fuck's evening?

• 18:47Speaker 02

  Um, noche?

• 18:49Speaker 00

  Noche del.

• 18:51Speaker 02

  Parentes?

• 18:51Speaker 00

  Parentes. Oh.

• 18:56Speaker 00

  Bebedos. Uh, y mi madre, Shanthi.

• 19:00Speaker 03

  Shanthi.

• 19:03Speaker 00

  Good, I think we're ready.

• 19:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 19:04Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 19:05Speaker 02

  They've got hosts.

• 19:06Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 19:08Speaker 06

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• 20:07Speaker 05

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• 20:37Speaker 00

  Now it's time to hear from our listeners. A reminder that you can send us a WhatsApp message or voice note to 07731623355. I'll say that slower. 07731623355. Or you can email [email protected]. I don't forget, if you haven't already, please could you like and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. First up, we have got a voice note sent by Joe from Suffolk.

• 21:04Speaker 07

  Hi Romesh, hi Shanthi. Me and my partner love the podcast. And the question I have for you today is me and a friend have been having a decade long argument. We can never seem to agree or understand each other's reasons. But I'd like you both to answer it and hear your thoughts on it. But it's a would you rather? So would you rather fight one dog sized spider, maybe about the size of a Labrador? Or would you rather fight a thousand seagulls? So would you rather fight a thousand seagulls or a dog sized spider? No weapons are allowed. You can only use your limbs. It's essentially just a fist fight.

• 21:46Speaker 00

  But uh yeah, thank you.

• 21:49Speaker 00

  Um, that's an unusual would you rather, is it? Cause it's normally like, would you rather fight a dog sized spider? Or a thousand spider sized dogs or something, do you know what I mean?

• 21:57Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 21:58Speaker 00

  It's quite unusual. Um mum? What would you rather fight? Dog sized spider? Do you understand the question? I don't mean to patronise you. So would you rather, if you, this is the choice you've got, a spider that's the size of a dog?

• 22:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 22:13Speaker 00

  Or a thousand seagulls? Which one would you rather fight?

• 22:19Speaker 03

  Seagulls.

• 22:20Speaker 00

  You'd rather fight a thousand seagulls?

• 22:22Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 22:23Speaker 00

  Uh, why please?

• 22:24Speaker 03

  If I have food, start throwing at them, they just fly over the food.

• 22:29Speaker 00

  I think the food would attract them to you, wouldn't it?

• 22:31Speaker 03

  No, just throw it faster quickly.

• 22:33Speaker 00

  You've got to feed a thousand seagulls.

• 22:35Speaker 03

  Why not?

• 22:35Speaker 00

  Probably just bring the normal amount of mutton rolls you bring into the podcast.

• 22:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 22:39Speaker 00

  Um, I don't think you're allowed to, I mean, he said no weapons.

• 22:44Speaker 03

  That's not a weapon.

• 22:45Speaker 00

  He said it's, I'm assuming that we've got nothing upset for our bodies. Unless you can.

• 22:49Speaker 03

  Well, they're okay.

• 22:50Speaker 00

  Yeah, so what would you rather fight?

• 22:54Speaker 03

  I don't wanna fight with anything.

• 22:56Speaker 00

  Okay, but I don't think, I don't think we can accept that. You have to fight one of them. Or a thousand of them.

• 23:04Speaker 03

  I'm not frightened of spider.

• 23:05Speaker 00

  Okay, if it's a dog sized spider?

• 23:07Speaker 03

  I never seen a dog sized spider.

• 23:10Speaker 00

  Me neither. Have you seen a dog sized spider?

• 23:12Speaker 03

  This is never ever in my life.

• 23:15Speaker 00

  George, no?

• 23:15Speaker 03

  No. So why would I fight with, he's just creating that to be interesting.

• 23:21Speaker 00

  Correct. So let's answer him.

• 23:23Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:23Speaker 00

  Would you rather fight a dog sized spider or a thousand seagulls?

• 23:28Speaker 03

  Seagulls.

• 23:29Speaker 00

  Okay. Why? A thousand seagulls mum? A thousand attacking you?

• 23:36Speaker 03

  I'll find a way of escaping.

• 23:39Speaker 00

  One thousand seagulls?

• 23:40Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, I will. I'll fight. It's a bird.

• 23:44Speaker 00

  It's a thousand birds.

• 23:45Speaker 03

  If it's sting you, you are dead.

• 23:48Speaker 00

  And nine hundred and ninety-nine of his mates.

• 23:50Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 23:51Speaker 00

  We don't know if the spider's poisonous, by the way.

• 23:54Speaker 02

  What's your technique for taking on the seagulls? How would you do it?

• 23:58Speaker 03

  I mean, Ramis is saying I can't take any food with me. So you are stuck with them to fight.

• 24:03Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 24:05Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 24:08Speaker 03

  Run off.

• 24:09Speaker 00

  Run off. Okay, I don't think it's a good, I mean.

• 24:13Speaker 03

  Oh, I lie down on the, on the ground.

• 24:15Speaker 00

  Yeah, and let them what, finish eating you.

• 24:17Speaker 03

  Why would they eat me?

• 24:18Speaker 00

  They're attacking you, you're in a fight with them. The whole thing is you're in a fight with them.

• 24:23Speaker 03

  I will say fuck off.

• 24:25Speaker 00

  Okay, I think that would probably work. And what, you'd say fuck off a thousand times, would you?

• 24:29Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 24:30Speaker 00

  It's not as easy as saying fuck off once to the dog-sized spider.

• 24:34Speaker 03

  I don't think there's a spider, the dog-sized.

• 24:37Speaker 00

  Do we know, has anyone seen, let's double check, has anyone seen a dog-sized spider?

• 24:40Speaker 03

  No way.

• 24:41Speaker 00

  You don't think so?

• 24:41Speaker 03

  Seagull, we have seen so many of the.

• 24:44Speaker 00

  Have you ever seen a thousand seagulls? Also, they're really big as well. What are? The seagulls. Yeah, massive.

• 24:49Speaker 03

  They nick the food, isn't it, so quick?

• 24:53Speaker 00

  I think seagulls are horrible, horrible, horrible fucks.

• 24:56Speaker 03

  They shit on you, isn't it?

• 24:58Speaker 00

  Yeah, and the ones in Brighton are so aggy. Theo, like, the kids, on more than one occasion when we've been in Brighton, had their food nicked off them. They come in like, you have to be really careful, if you buy food on the pier.

• 25:09Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 25:10Speaker 00

  They come in and just nick it, horrible, imagine a thousand of them.

• 25:15Speaker 00

  A thousand.

• 25:15Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:16Speaker 02

  Largest spider is the goliath, bird eater.

• 25:21Speaker 00

  Bird eater, yeah, how, how big is that? Well, you could do.

• 25:24Speaker 02

  Thirteen centimetres.

• 25:25Speaker 00

  We could do one of those against those seagulls, couldn't you?

• 25:27Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 25:28Speaker 00

  Thirteen centimetres?

• 25:29Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 25:30Speaker 00

  Thirteen?

• 25:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 25:31Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 25:31Speaker 02

  The body, yeah, both the body length of up to thirteen centimetres.

• 25:36Speaker 00

  Boths.

• 25:36Speaker 02

  Making it.

• 25:38Speaker 00

  Arrogant.

• 25:39Speaker 02

  Roughly the size of a dinner plate.

• 25:41Speaker 00

  Okay, so that's the biggest spider you can get, so this is, I'm assuming that Joe's made a.

• 25:46Speaker 03

  I think, I, I'll change my mind, I'll go with the spider.

• 25:49Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 25:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, because.

• 25:50Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 25:50Speaker 03

  I get a stick and I hit it so bad.

• 25:53Speaker 00

  Not allowed a weapon?

• 25:54Speaker 03

  No, oh.

• 25:55Speaker 01

  You could kick it, you could kick it.

• 25:57Speaker 03

  Oh, feed the damn thing.

• 25:58Speaker 00

  Can't take food. You see what I mean? You're allowed to be clothed, I believe.

• 26:03Speaker 03

  Spider god, spider god. Eyes on the stomach or so many eyes they have.

• 26:09Speaker 00

  They've got a lot of eyes, yeah.

• 26:11Speaker 03

  Lot of eyes, yeah.

• 26:12Speaker 00

  Poke it in the eyes?

• 26:14Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 26:14Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 26:15Speaker 03

  With the finger?

• 26:16Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 26:16Speaker 03

  Yeah, blind them.

• 26:18Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 26:18Speaker 03

  And the other one?

• 26:19Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 26:20Speaker 03

  So they won't be able to see to fight?

• 26:22Speaker 00

  Yeah, and then what if they start spinning a web?

• 26:25Speaker 03

  Spinning a web?

• 26:26Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 26:26Speaker 03

  It's not strong.

• 26:28Speaker 00

  It's a dog-sized spider.

• 26:29Speaker 03

  Oh, that's okay. It's not a Spider-Man.

• 26:32Speaker 00

  And it's not Spider-Man?

• 26:33Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 26:34Speaker 00

  Spider dog.

• 26:35Speaker 03

  Spider dog?

• 26:36Speaker 00

  Okay, uh, I think, I think this is no brainer. Dog-sized spider all day.

• 26:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 26:40Speaker 00

  Hundred percent. A thousand seagulls, no way. Dog-sized spider, I think mum's right, poke it in the eyes, try and avoid the webbing. I think a few good punches to the eyeballs just to really,

• 26:56Speaker 00

  just to really stun it. And then what I would try, I, I would, my initial thing would be to punch it in the eyes, sort of stun it, then I'll try and break one of its legs off, like pull one of its legs off, and then beat it. Beat it, you fashion a weapon out of the leg and you beat the, the spider with one of its legs. And it's seven-legged now. So its balance is all over the place.

• 27:17Speaker 03

  Hmm, just imagination.

• 27:19Speaker 00

  You're correct.

• 27:20Speaker 07

  It's not real.

• 27:21Speaker 00

  This is, I'm not, I'm not telling you the story of something that happened.

• 27:28Speaker 00

  Now, apparently Joe's got a take on this. Show him a listen.

• 27:31Speaker 07

  Uh, I would rather fight the one dog-sized spider purely because if you defeat one of the seagulls, you still have nine hundred and ninety-nine enemies that fly and could beat you in the head really hard. Um, it's a no-brainer for me, but my friend seems to feel the complete opposite way and it's, uh, divided our friendship for years and sort of every time we come across somebody that we know that hasn't had an input into the argument, we bring them in.

• 27:57Speaker 02

  And we seem to have this thing going to see who's team seagull or who is team dog sized spider. But yeah, interesting to see what your answers are. Thank you.

• 28:07Speaker 00

  Uh, well, look, Joe, it sounds like we agree with you. I would go if I, if I was naming the teams, I would just call it team spider. So it's quite annoying to have to say dog sized every time. I think you're right and your friend's wrong. That's my opinion. Mum and I both think spider. Uh, so we're team spider, uh, unless that's the opposite. Anyway, it doesn't matter. Thank you so much for your voice note. We've now got.

• 28:29Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 28:31Speaker 00

  We've now got an email from Eve. Um, we don't know if it's the, the Eve. Uh, but as I can see, her great aunt lives in Sri Lanka, so I think it's unlikely.

• 28:43Speaker 02

  You don't know.

• 28:44Speaker 00

  Hi, Romesh and Shanthi. It's Eve here. I need you and Shanthi's help with a problem. My great aunt lives in Sri Lanka in Jaffna. And has a pet dog called Raj who we visited recently. She started giving him leftover curry as a treat. Oh God. Fucking hell. She started giving him leftover curry as a treat, but the problem is he no longer eats any of his usual dog food. He won't eat anything except curry.

• 29:14Speaker 00

  We don't want him to starve, so we do keep feeding him curry.

• 29:20Speaker 00

  But the, as the vet said, he's now becoming morbidly obese. Oh God. Oh, should have read ahead. Hold on, let's clear our palates because this is actually getting quite sad now. We're now worried that he will no longer be able to walk soon. People in our village are laughing at him. As he's gotten so big, we'd really like your advice to help our dog start eating real dog food again. Me and my mum really love your podcast, by the way, but my Sri Lankan family think you're mean to your mum. Oh yeah. Uh, that is a, an ongoing thing that I'm too mean. Uh, can I, sorry, I'm not going to do the usual. I, I think there's a strong argument that mum's meaner to me than I am to her on this podcast and you, and, and I think you take her side. I, I think it's actually for you to say that mum isn't giving as good as she gets is actually quite patronizing.

• 30:03Speaker 00

  So shame on you, actually. Go fuck yourselves.

• 30:07Speaker 02

  There it is.

• 30:08Speaker 00

  Now.

• 30:11Speaker 00

  We were at the wedding in September, which you missed and your mum went to. Oh, what?

• 30:16Speaker 03

  What?

• 30:16Speaker 00

  What? We were at the wedding in September, which you missed and your mum went to. And we're all very disappointed you couldn't make it. And we were glad to hear Shanthi tell you off for it on the podcast. Oh, my God, do you remember that wedding?

• 30:28Speaker 03

  What wedding, Dad?

• 30:28Speaker 00

  The wedding where I organised the car for you and you went and then you-

• 30:32Speaker 03

  Oh, oh my, that's my cousin's daughter.

• 30:34Speaker 00

  Yeah, so they were, they were at the wedding. Eve was at the wedding, is that what she's saying?

• 30:38Speaker 03

  Were you?

• 30:39Speaker 00

  Holy shit, so you actually, you might have met Eve? Did she say anything about-

• 30:45Speaker 03

  I don't know, I can, I can ask my cousin, who is this Eve?

• 30:48Speaker 00

  Yeah, could you move, um, the mic close to your throat?

• 31:01Speaker 00

  Um, okay, well, thank you so much for your email, Eve.

• 31:04Speaker 03

  What are I doing?

• 31:05Speaker 00

  I'm doing what you were doing. Thank you for your advice, we love the podcast, keep making these episodes with Shanthi, we will do, won't we, Mum?

• 31:13Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 31:13Speaker 00

  Unless, I, I, one of the things that I, um, do you actually enjoy doing the podcast?

• 31:19Speaker 03

  I do, a lot.

• 31:20Speaker 00

  You would tell me if you're thinking about quitting, wouldn't you? If Mum quit, would we have to just end it? Um. Like, we, we wouldn't do the Monday ones either, would we?

• 31:28Speaker 02

  Don't know what we'd do.

• 31:29Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 31:30Speaker 02

  You know, you think, you're not thinking of quitting, are you?

• 31:33Speaker 03

  I, I never said that, but it's coming into rumour, this bitch-

• 31:37Speaker 00

  What if?

• 31:38Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 31:38Speaker 03

  Is here all the time. I need to get rid of her, that's why he's asking questions.

• 31:44Speaker 00

  Can everyone else say that? Uh, do you, uh, would you do a one on your own, Mum?

• 31:49Speaker 03

  No.

• 31:50Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 31:50Speaker 03

  I want my son.

• 31:51Speaker 00

  Um, thank you, Eve, sorry that I didn't, I'm sorry I wasn't at the wedding, as you know, Mum was really pissed off. Uh, what do you think she should do about her dog, Raj?

• 31:59Speaker 03

  Put him on a diet with, uh, just, don't give him curry, boiled meat or something. No, don't add all these spices and things.

• 32:08Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 32:09Speaker 03

  Uh, it's a lot of fat going into his body, so it's bad.

• 32:12Speaker 00

  I, um, I can't believe you, anybody started, I, I, the idea of feeding a dog curry feels so-

• 32:19Speaker 03

  No, be you do, back on.

• 32:20Speaker 00

  But it's just so insane. Do you know what I mean, like?

• 32:25Speaker 00

  You're basically weaponising that dog's arsehole, i- i- it's like, I find it so horrible having to clean up dog poop anyway, let alone after they've had a curry. Anyway, we have a rule at our house, the dog's not allowed any human food at all. That's, I know this isn't helpful, but I'm just saying, they, that, that we have to.

• 32:45Speaker 03

  They love cake, no?

• 32:46Speaker 00

  No.

• 32:47Speaker 03

  Do they love cake?

• 32:48Speaker 00

  No, they do, they would like to eat cake if they could.

• 32:50Speaker 03

  He lick it, yeah.

• 32:52Speaker 00

  If you drop, the boys are very messy.

• 32:54Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:54Speaker 00

  And so sometimes they hover around because they know that those kids, the kids are gonna drop food, but they're not allowed to beg or anything like that. Um, I think you need to, uh, not give curry as an option to the dog. I, I think you actually, i- if you don't give the dog the option of curry, eventually the dog will just eat anything, right?

• 33:13Speaker 03

  That's it, yeah, don't feed him.

• 33:15Speaker 00

  Dogs are actually quite, pe- people kind of think that dogs are really like nice, and they are nice in a way, but also they're quite selfish. And so it, and they're quite clever, so if they think, basically you've trained the dog to know that you, you're gonna offer food for a bit, and then if that doesn't work, you'll give the dog curry, you need to remove that option from the dog's mind. So you need to train that dog to realise that curry is no longer an option. And unfortunately, you've got a lot of training to do because the dog has had it rea- Raj has had it reinforced to him that curry is an option for a long time, so it's gonna take you a while to undo that. Um, but yeah, you need to cut that out. Treats, and also treats, cut out treats, yeah, treats are.

• 33:57Speaker 03

  If you want the dog to live for a long time.

• 33:59Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 34:00Speaker 03

  I mean, their age thing is twelve years, is it? They live for twelve or thirteen.

• 34:07Speaker 00

  Depends on the breed.

• 34:07Speaker 03

  Breed, okay, so.

• 34:10Speaker 00

  Dog-sized spiders can live longer.

• 34:14Speaker 03

  Why are you bringing that in? This is no, this is separate.

• 34:16Speaker 00

  I was just doing a little callback, sorry, yeah.

• 34:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, then, uh, you have to look after him, don't give him curry.

• 34:21Speaker 00

  Yeah, don't give him curry.

• 34:22Speaker 02

  Can you just scale the curry spices slowly over time, over a week or two?

• 34:28Speaker 00

  What, make it blander and, but they, but they wanna give it dog food, don't they? What, what is it?

• 34:32Speaker 02

  And then keep incrementally putting some dog food in and transition slowly.

• 34:39Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's not a bad idea.

• 34:40Speaker 03

  That's not a bad idea, yeah, you can.

• 34:42Speaker 00

  Yeah. What, what are they, what do they want to fit? Can we just scroll up to the email, please?

• 34:46Speaker 03

  They want the dog food.

• 34:47Speaker 00

  Yeah, they want to eat dog food. Dog food, hmm. Yeah, you could just get, you know, we get our kids.

• 34:52Speaker 03

  Where is that dog? Is he in Sri Lanka?

• 34:54Speaker 00

  Yes, in Sri Lanka, Jaffna, actually.

• 34:56Speaker 03

  Jaffna.

• 34:57Speaker 02

  Is that a thing in Sri Lanka that do people?

• 34:59Speaker 03

  We do feed curry.

• 35:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 35:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 35:01Speaker 00

  What do you mean by that? What's that supposed to mean?

• 35:03Speaker 02

  Nice to know what the.

• 35:06Speaker 02

  What the tradition was, that was all.

• 35:07Speaker 00

  It's not tradition.

• 35:09Speaker 02

  What the norm was.

• 35:10Speaker 00

  Right, okay. Well, this is not the norm. I know you think that because it's Sri Lanka and you're trying to sort of set up a new stereotype. But actually, they normally feed it dog food. But this is uh uh unusual and it so happens that mum used to do that as well, but that's but two is not a robust enough sample size.

• 35:29Speaker 02

  Two out of two.

• 35:29Speaker 00

  Yeah, fine, that you've encountered of the ones that you've encountered.

• 35:34Speaker 02

  Well, the ones that have talked about feeding the dog.

• 35:35Speaker 00

  Okay, so if you met two Sri Lankans that had BO, would you go they all smell?

• 35:39Speaker 02

  Shall we go on to the third question?

• 35:41Speaker 00

  Okay, we've got a voice note from Guy in Portugal. Let's have a listen.

• 35:44Speaker 06

  Hi, Romesh. Hi, Shanthi. Love your podcast. My name is Guy from Portugal. My dilemma is quite simple. Every day I have to take a bus to the office. It's a commute of around forty minutes. I take the bus early in the morning around seven thirty and I like to chill on the bus, maybe take a nap or listen to some podcasts or music. But now and then, every now and then, a guy I know, not really a friend of mine, but a friend of a friend, uh I'm we are polite with each other, but every time he sees me on the bus, he sits by my side and he starts chatting and it ruins the trip completely because I cannot, I'm not

• 36:28Speaker 06

  interested in maintaining a conversation that early in the morning. I want to chill. I want to listen to something, uh listen to the latest episodes and I cannot do it. And my dilemma is how can I tell him that I don't want to chat on the bus uh without being rude, without offending him, without hurting his feelings. Uh Shanthi, how would you do it? Uh greetings from Portugal. Love your podcast. Bye bye.

• 36:57Speaker 00

  Okay, thank you so much for your uh voice note.

• 37:03Speaker 00

  I I think it's unacceptable that the default expectation of people that see people they know on public transport is that they want to talk. That should not be the default. The default should be they don't want to talk. And then conversation is unusual. I don't get it. When you're on the, I I I sympathize with Guy. What would you do?

• 37:23Speaker 03

  I will buy, uh, in Portugal, there you can buy lovely cakes there. Because Sri Lanka ruled by Portuguese so many thousand years ago.

• 37:34Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 37:35Speaker 03

  So we learned some of the cakes from them.

• 37:37Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 37:37Speaker 03

  Okay, right, buy a cake and, or just tell him I made this cake.

• 37:43Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 37:44Speaker 03

  You you eat some, then he can eat some, he will keep his mouth shut.

• 37:53Speaker 03

  Give him a big piece.

• 37:54Speaker 00

  I had no idea.

• 37:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's true. Shut him up. I'll wait, give him a drink as well.

• 38:02Speaker 00

  So bring a cake. Chewy cake. You ask specifically for mum's advice.

• 38:08Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 38:09Speaker 00

  Every day, bring a cake and a drink and give it to that guy and he'll get the message you don't want to talk to.

• 38:18Speaker 03

  Take a different time bus or he can go early.

• 38:21Speaker 00

  He can't do that because he's got to get to work at a certain time.

• 38:23Speaker 03

  Certain time, there will be a bus before that time.

• 38:27Speaker 00

  I know, but he doesn't want to get an earlier bus just for the sake of avoiding this guy.

• 38:31Speaker 03

  Or later.

• 38:32Speaker 00

  Yeah, but he might be late to work.

• 38:33Speaker 03

  Tell the boss.

• 38:34Speaker 00

  Say to the boss what? I've got this guy that keeps talking to me on the bus, I want to listen to a podcast.

• 38:37Speaker 03

  My wife is pregnant.

• 38:38Speaker 00

  My wife is pregnant?

• 38:39Speaker 03

  Yeah, so I have to come a bit late.

• 38:41Speaker 00

  Where, what's, you're, why does he have to come late because his wife is? Okay, Guy, what can we do? You either say your wife's pregnant or you take a cake, all right, man? Okay?

• 38:55Speaker 00

  Um.

• 38:57Speaker 03

  What's your advice?

• 38:58Speaker 00

  It's di- it's difficult. It's really difficult.

• 39:01Speaker 03

  You can't be rude to him.

• 39:02Speaker 00

  Empathize with Guy quite a lot.

• 39:03Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 39:05Speaker 00

  Um, Guy, if the guy doesn't know, uh, what, well, look, the, the, the truth is the easiest thing to say is I don't, I, I, I feel a bit tired. You can actually be honest if you want and go, actually, this is one of the only quiet times I get. I'm happy to say hello and stuff, but it's okay if I, and you're listening to stuff, so you can actually lie and say, I've got to listen to this for work. Do you mind if I get to this? And you just say hello and like, I have a couple of question, you know, a bit of interaction and go, really sorry, man, I've got to listen to this thing. And then you set that up and then that can take you a few days.

• 39:47Speaker 00

  And then you can say, you know, maybe one day you do have a chat with him and then you go, I've got another thing I've got to, and then basically what you're doing is you're reducing the, the expectation to talk on the bus. I think that's, that's probably the easiest way to do it.

• 40:01Speaker 03

  Or he can say he got a project to finish.

• 40:04Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:05Speaker 03

  And I'm working on it.

• 40:06Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:06Speaker 03

  And that's why I'm listening and get some ideas.

• 40:09Speaker 00

  Sort of similar, sort of.

• 40:09Speaker 03

  Yeah. Kind of very similar.

• 40:11Speaker 00

  Quite close to my own.

• 40:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 40:15Speaker 02

  Nice pro- project.

• 40:17Speaker 00

  Yeah. Yes. Really good idea, Mum, actually.

• 40:21Speaker 03

  Why?

• 40:22Speaker 00

  What?

• 40:24Speaker 03

  You don't talk. We are sitting in the car.

• 40:29Speaker 00

  When?

• 40:30Speaker 03

  When we travel together.

• 40:32Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:33Speaker 03

  What do I do? Don't talk.

• 40:35Speaker 00

  Yeah. What are you talking about?

• 40:36Speaker 03

  Yeah, we can do that. You don't have to talk.

• 40:39Speaker 00

  You don't have to talk. You don't have to talk. Yeah, but he, the guy's trying to talk to him.

• 40:42Speaker 03

  He, if he doesn't give a appropriate answer.

• 40:45Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:45Speaker 03

  He will shut up.

• 40:48Speaker 00

  What do you mean appropriate answer?

• 40:50Speaker 03

  So every time he asks you a question, he make or something, maybe he's giving you a.

• 40:55Speaker 00

  Let's try it now. You're on the bus.

• 40:57Speaker 03

  Mm hmm.

• 40:57Speaker 00

  Okay, I mean, that would never happen, but you're on the bus or train, that would also never happen. But you're on the bus or train and I come and sit with you. Okay? You're Shanthi, I'll be stranger.

• 41:09Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 41:10Speaker 00

  And let's make it in the real world. So I've recog- let's say I've recognized you. All right? Busy this train, isn't it?

• 41:17Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 41:19Speaker 00

  Are you, um, are you Shanthi Ranganathan?

• 41:24Speaker 03

  I am.

• 41:25Speaker 00

  I listen to your podcast. I'm such a big fan.

• 41:28Speaker 03

  Oh, thank you so much for giving me a compliment.

• 41:31Speaker 00

  Where, where do you record that podcast? It's, it's, it's so good.

• 41:35Speaker 03

  In London somewhere.

• 41:36Speaker 00

  In London. Oh, amazing, amazing. And is it, do you enjoy doing it?

• 41:41Speaker 03

  I do thoroughly enjoy. Why do you ask?

• 41:44Speaker 00

  What, I was just at Trisys. And what's it like working with your son? Like, it must be, he seems really funny.

• 41:50Speaker 03

  He is funny. I enjoy working with him.

• 41:55Speaker 03

  Uh, you have anything else you want to ask?

• 41:59Speaker 00

  Doesn't really feel like you're shutting down.

• 42:05Speaker 00

  You're inviting more questions.

• 42:11Speaker 03

  No, I'm giving him a message. He's on a fucking lawyer. Why does he want to know all that? Anything else you want to ask?

• 42:21Speaker 00

  Oh, I see.

• 42:23Speaker 03

  Stop it.

• 42:24Speaker 00

  It feels like you're inviting more questions, that's all.

• 42:26Speaker 03

  Uh, then he will run out of questions. You won't answer.

• 42:29Speaker 00

  All right. Well, thank you, Guy. We hope that works. And I've got to be honest, I'm very excited to hear that somebody in Portugal listens to the podcast. That's cool, isn't it? Uh, okay. Uh, thank you so much, everybody. Uh, a reminder to you that you shouldn't interact with strangers or friends on public transport unless they invite you to. Just let them listen to the Romesh Ranganathan Show in peace. That's all we've got time for. Thank you for listening and watching. We'll be back next week. And don't forget to tune in on Monday for another top interview. Mum, would you like to say goodbye?

• 42:57Speaker 03

  Goodbye, Guy. Everybody love you all.

• 42:59Speaker 00

  Everybody. It's not just, that's not just a goodbye to Guy. Everybody.

• 43:02Speaker 03

  He's a last caller.

• 43:04Speaker 00

  Voice note.

• 43:05Speaker 03

  This podcast.

• 43:06Speaker 00

  Yeah, okay.

• 43:06Speaker 03

  So I just say bye.

• 43:09Speaker 00

  Yeah, okay.

• 43:10Speaker 03

  And, and I love everybody.

• 43:12Speaker 00

  We love everybody here.

• 43:13Speaker 03

  Yeah, and bye bye.

• 43:15Speaker 00

  Bye bye.

• 43:16Speaker 03

  Have a good day.

• 43:16Speaker 00

  Especially to Guy. Take care. See you later.

• 43:19Speaker 03

  Here we go.

• 43:20Speaker 00

  And that guy that keeps talking to Guy on the bus, fuck off, mate. Peace.

• 43:24Speaker 03

  Eat a cake. That's it.

• 43:26Speaker 00

  Eat a cake. Thank you so much for watching and listening to this episode. Before you go, if you've enjoyed this episode and you've not subscribed, that's a bold decision, crazy behaviour. Follow and subscribe to the Romesh Rang and Ethan Show wherever you listen. It helps me, really, like, really helps me. It helps the team and it costs you absolutely nothing. We drop episodes every Monday and Thursday. Mondays, I'm joined by great guests. Thursdays, my mum, Shadi, joins me to answer your questions and family dilemmas. We'll see you Monday with another great guest and back here with mum on Thursday. If you've got a problem you want to solve or a story you want to share, send it to [email protected], voice note or text us on 07731 623355. We can't

• 44:09Speaker 00

  promise good advice, but you might end up on the show. See you soon.

• 44:16Speaker 05

  Coca-Cola. For the big, for the small, the short and the tall. Peacemakers, risk takers. For the optimists, pessimists. For long distance love. For introverts and extroverts. The thinkers and the doers. For old friends and new. Coca-Cola. For everyone. Pick up some Coca-Cola at a store near you.

• 44:46Speaker 06

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