‘About Last Night’ With Bill Simmons, Chris Ryan, and Mallory Rubin

Bill, Chris, and Mal head on over to Mother’s for a quick boilermaker or two after revisiting the 1986 romantic comedy ‘About Last Night,’ starring Rob Lowe, Demi Moore, Jim Belushi, and Elizabeth Perkins. Producers: Craig Horlbeck, Chia Hao Tat, Eduardo Ocampo, and Matt Pevic LIONSGATE’S MUTINY, STARRING JASON STATHAM, ONLY IN THEATERS AUGUST 21 Put ChatGPT to work on your most ambitious ideas and projects. Get started at https://ChatGPT.com by selecting Work mode. Available on Plus and Pro plans Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:05Bill Simmons?

  The Rewatchables, second episode of the week. It's brought to you by the Ringer Podcast Network, where you can find The House of R.

• 0:13Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 0:13Bill Simmons?

  With Malley Rubin. You can find The Watch with Chris Ryan, the new owner of the Los Angeles Lakers. Congratulations.

• 0:21Chris Ryan?

  Thanks, Bob and Josh and I, we did some-

• 0:23Bill Simmons?

  Glad you guys pulled that off. I think you guys are gonna do a great job.

• 0:25Chris Ryan?

  Change from the couch cushions there.

• 0:29Bill Simmons?

  This podcast is a hard R and possibly an NC 17. 48th anniversary of About Last Night, next. This episode of The Rewatchables is presented by the movie Mutiny, only in theaters August 21st. Our guy, Jason Statham, stars in Mutiny, the new action thriller from the director of Plane. I like that movie. When an international conspiracy turns deadly, that always happens. Statham goes off the grid on a one-man mission, I love one-man missions, to take down those responsible. And if you're a fan of The Beekeeper, The Meg, or The Expendables, guilty. This is exactly the kind of movie you want to see Statham in. You've sold me.

• 1:13Bill Simmons?

  One of the defining action stars of the last 25 years, doing what he does best. I agree with that. Think Die Hard on a Boat, that sounds great. Mutiny, only in theaters August 21st, rated R for strong bloody violence and language. There you go.

• 1:30Speaker 03

  For adults with Crohn's disease or ulcerative colitis symptoms, every choice matters.

• 1:37Speaker 03

  Tremfya offers self-injection or intravenous infusion from the start. Tremfya is administered as injections under the skin or infusions through a vein every four weeks, followed by injections under the skin every four or eight weeks. If your doctor decides that you can self-inject Tremfya, proper training is required. Tremfya is a prescription medicine used to treat adults with moderately to severely active Crohn's disease and adults with moderately to severely active ulcerative colitis, serious allergic reactions, increased risk of infections or lower ability to fight them, and liver problems may occur. Before treatment, get checked for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection, flu-like symptoms, or need a vaccine. Explore what's possible. Ask your doctor about Tremfya today.

• 2:22Speaker 03

  Call 1-800-526-7736 to learn more, or visit tremfyaradio.com.

• 2:45Chris Ryan?

  When these movies turn 40.

• 2:47Bill Simmons?

  Is it, you want to start it?

• 2:48Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, I want to ask you, when these movies turn 40, how does it make you feel?

• 2:52Bill Simmons?

  This one really hurts, because I remember where I saw it.

• 2:54Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 2:55Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 2:55Bill Simmons?

  Who I was with, not knowing anything about how a relationship worked and just being like-

• 3:01Speaker 01

  I don't think this movie taught you that.

• 3:03Bill Simmons?

  Unfortunately, I felt like it did when I was 16. I'm like, oh, now I have the blueprint for how a relationship goes.

• 3:09Speaker 01

  How clarifying.

• 3:10Bill Simmons?

  Wrong blueprint. But this, this really was unconventional for the beginning, middle, end, and then re-rise of a relationship in a movie. I don't remember seeing a lot of these.

• 3:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 3:21Bill Simmons?

  I felt like I was learning a lot in real time.

• 3:23Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, it's probably like closer to Annie Hall than it is like, I don't know, like definitely like St. Louis Fire. I mean, it's, it's, it's way closer to something like that.

• 3:33Bill Simmons?

  Well, I was thinking, things you learn-

• 3:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 3:36Bill Simmons?

  When you're growing up, basic things you learn from a movie.

• 3:38Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 3:40Bill Simmons?

  Like how to drink a beer.

• 3:42Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 3:43Bill Simmons?

  How to, how to have sex, what sex is like.

• 3:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, how to shout tits and ass.

• 3:47Bill Simmons?

  Different positions, what boobs look like.

• 3:50Speaker 01

  Well, I mean-

• 3:51Bill Simmons?

  How to, how to shoot somebody, you find that out on TV or in movies.

• 3:54Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 3:55Bill Simmons?

  How to do drugs, how to like shoot heroin, how would I know that otherwise, I'm like 12.

• 3:59Chris Ryan?

  You're always slamming your head back when you do a line of coke now.

• 4:02Bill Simmons?

  Right, how to do this. How you make meat sauce, I learned from Comenza, gotta put the meat in. How to double-cross somebody, and then how to survive a relationship you screwed up. I think it was the legacy of this one. But you loved this movie, I asked you to do it, you were delighted.

• 4:19Speaker 01

  I was thrilled, thrilled, I mean, what a treat. This is, in some ways, I feel like we've always been talking about this movie with each other, you know, over our, what, 13, 14, gosh, years together. I'd say that it is referenced either directly or subtly in every conversation that we've had for a decade and a half, and-

• 4:38Bill Simmons?

  Lot of the lines.

• 4:39Speaker 01

  Yep, yep.

• 4:41Bill Simmons?

  Things I just took from this movie that I don't even think I really realized it till I was studying it, watching it twice in two days.

• 4:46Speaker 01

  Exactly, yeah.

• 4:47Bill Simmons?

  Also a movie I could have done blind, I really did think about it.

• 4:49Speaker 01

  Well, you had told us you might do that, so does that mean you decided against it? You revisited the sacred text?

• 4:56Bill Simmons?

  You know why I decided against it?

• 4:57Speaker 01

  Because you liked the movie.

• 4:58Bill Simmons?

  I was like, you know what, I wanna watch this.

• 5:00Chris Ryan?

  As we push towards 2028, I think we should consider Blind Month.

• 5:04Bill Simmons?

  Blind Month?

• 5:05Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 5:06Speaker 01

  Is that movies about blind people, or is it just no prep?

• 5:11Chris Ryan?

  No, it's all about, it's Bird Box, it's-

• 5:14Bill Simmons?

  Are there notes? We just have like blank categories, what do we do?

• 5:18Chris Ryan?

  Uh, I think we would just have to just like see how much of the pod we could do based on memory. But maybe Craig could be like, you guys should do most rewatchable scene here, or something like that.

• 5:26Bill Simmons?

  Like Craig, or Craig could say each category?

• 5:28Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 5:30Bill Simmons?

  I'd be ready to do it.

• 5:33Bill Simmons?

  This movie, I don't know why, I've seen at least once a year for 40 years.

• 5:37Speaker 01

  Once a year for 40 years?

• 5:38Bill Simmons?

  Just average.

• 5:39Speaker 01

  So this is your, like, I watch the entire extended edition cut of The Lord of the Rings trilogy every Thanksgiving. That's a tradition that my husband and I share. We've, the last couple of years, I've done it closer to Christmas, but it's always-

• 5:51Bill Simmons?

  The Lord of the Rings is a movie?

• 5:53Speaker 01

  About to find out, you know?

• 5:56Speaker 01

  It's a holiday tradition, it's our, legitimately our favorite thing we do all year.

• 6:00Bill Simmons?

  Okay.

• 6:00Speaker 01

  So your version of that is watching About Last Night by yourself?

• 6:06Bill Simmons?

  No.

• 6:07Speaker 01

  With your family, over the holidays?

• 6:09Bill Simmons?

  If it's on, it's like, oh, this is on, my wife loves this. There's very few movies that I love and my wife love equally.

• 6:16Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 6:17Bill Simmons?

  And this is-

• 6:18Speaker 01

  Interesting, yeah.

• 6:18Bill Simmons?

  Probably less than 15.

• 6:20Chris Ryan?

  My wife was salty, because I just knocked this out, and she was like, I would have watched that with you. She was like hurt.

• 6:26Bill Simmons?

  Was she home?

• 6:28Chris Ryan?

  She was around, but like I was like, hey, 8:00 PM tonight, let's watch About Last Night, she was-

• 6:33Speaker 01

  I don't know, man, it feels like it connects to the commentary in the film. You're not gonna be Siamese twins, you're gonna maintain your own lives, make your own choices.

• 6:42Bill Simmons?

  When you told her you watched the movie, did you sit in the dark in a red chair with a cigarette?

• 6:46Chris Ryan?

  And just be like, this isn't working out.

• 6:49Speaker 01

  Unbelievable, the mood lighting in that scene, I'm gonna see your face for this, incredible.

• 6:54Bill Simmons?

  I think what's shocking about this movie is how well-done it is for an 80s movie. Because think of all the movies that, like even Rob Lowe and Demi Moore, but like-

• 7:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:04Bill Simmons?

  We're kind of have a certain expectation for 80s movies that I loved, but they were kind of here, and this one's pretty good. I really feel like it holds up from a structure standpoint, 40, and an acting standpoint.

• 7:16Chris Ryan?

  Got a real good director on it, so Ed Zwick goes on to make like tons of stuff, like Glory and, you know, Last Samurai.

• 7:23Bill Simmons?

  30-something?

• 7:24Chris Ryan?

  30-something, it's just-

• 7:25Speaker 01

  Blood Diamond?

• 7:25Chris Ryan?

  Blood Diamond, of course, TIA.

• 7:28Bill Simmons?

  Blood Diamond, go do it, CR.

• 7:29Chris Ryan?

  TIA, dead. This is Africa.

• 7:33Speaker 01

  Incredible.

• 7:35Speaker 01

  Mammoth source material.

• 7:36Chris Ryan?

  Mammoth source material, of which there's like-

• 7:38Speaker 01

  Some tweaks.

• 7:38Chris Ryan?

  Two big scenes, at least in my memory, that they take more or less verbatim.

• 7:43Bill Simmons?

  First scene is basically-

• 7:45Chris Ryan?

  It's, that's the opening scene of the play.

• 7:46Speaker 01

  You can tell.

• 7:47Chris Ryan?

  Although, it's worth mentioning that the play is much more vicious.

• 7:51Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 7:53Chris Ryan?

  Is a lot less probably palatable to like a mass audience, because like that opening scene, it's like Lico and Danny are like, oh, if she's 18, she's ready to go, like there, it's dark, but-

• 8:06Bill Simmons?

  Is she a pro?

• 8:06Chris Ryan?

  And at, at this point, we can't say.

• 8:10Bill Simmons?

  We don't know.

• 8:11Chris Ryan?

  But the biggest thing for me about this movie is like, they take staged source material, and the way they make it feel like a movie in cinema is to just make Chicago the like, the main, the main character of the movie.

• 8:22Bill Simmons?

  The fifth character in the movie, yeah.

• 8:23Speaker 01

  Great use of the city, the river walks, your local bar, the apartments feel simultaneously of a piece in terms of like, the way you understand quickly how the people live and inhabit them, but they're really distinct from each other. The ballpark, of course, you know, you can feel the way that these people would be like, yeah, I mean, Mothers is the, you know, not to already jump into the categories, but I mean, Mothers is just perfectly used, absolutely perfectly used. And, you know, to understand right away that like, you've got the different, we've got the advertising team, right? So we have different groups of people who are meeting and interacting for the first time, but also you kind of buy that they're inhabiting the same slice of the city. It's a great Chicago movie, I mean, it's a crowded field for Chicago movies, as the three of us have discussed previously together, one podcasting about the fugitive.

• 9:06Chris Ryan?

  This did make me realize, though, I think-

• 9:08Bill Simmons?

  What a run.

• 9:08Chris Ryan?

  Where you probably find San Francisco to be the movie city of the 90s.

• 9:13Speaker 01

  I was thinking about this too.

• 9:14Chris Ryan?

  I think Chicago's the movie city of the 80s.

• 9:15Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 9:16Chris Ryan?

  Between Blues Brothers, did we?

• 9:17Bill Simmons?

  Well, we did like, we, we talked about the best possible stretch, and it's between 85 and 86. They're just, John Hughes is still doing them, Chuck Norris is there for Code of Silence.

• 9:28Chris Ryan?

  Running Scared.

• 9:29Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, Running Scare is there, Ferris, they're filming Ferris in the city as they're filming this in the city, I think.

• 9:36Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 9:37Bill Simmons?

  Two years after Risky Business, so-

• 9:39Chris Ryan?

  Thief in the beginning of the decade, Blues Brothers in the beginning of the decade.

• 9:42Bill Simmons?

  Don't tell us what you thought of this movie yet. Did it make you want to move to Chicago in the summer?

• 9:46Speaker 04

  I've never wanted to live in a world more than the opening sequence of this film. Between the baseball field and Mothers and the walk and the bike riding.

• 9:54Speaker 01

  It's the best. Look at that face, look at that face.

• 9:56Bill Simmons?

  See, I-

• 9:57Speaker 01

  You love, I mean, come on, he was, he was gonna love the movie.

• 10:01Bill Simmons?

  I've always loved Chicago, had a couple, couple coffees there, but this movie does a nice job of giving you all the beats of Chicago, right? Summer, it's the best place on the earth, and then you get to the winter and it's just pouring rain and snow.

• 10:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:14Bill Simmons?

  Kind of timed with the movie, the ebbs and flows of-

• 10:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:17Bill Simmons?

  How we do it. And then we just have the, we said Chicago's a character, Mothers is a character. The four people in this are fucking lights out. It's like a four for four. Jim Belushi?

• 10:28Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 10:28Bill Simmons?

  I don't know where this came from.

• 10:30Chris Ryan?

  Well, he played this character a couple of times on the stage, and he was like, there are points when like, I didn't know, basically when the character ended and when I began. It was obviously like something he really connected to.

• 10:41Bill Simmons?

  Tits and ass, tits and ass.

• 10:45Speaker 01

  His performance is my favorite thing about the movie by like a comfortable margin. I think it's iconic, genuinely iconic. He has some of the best lines. I mean, the delivery. Who said at first, I did Dan, Dan, Dan, was it before you came or after? Like really asking the questions of our time, trying to understand how his friend is navigating these meaningful circumstances as you, as you go through life.

• 11:11Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I have a lot of Belushi stuff for later. I did want to talk about the dating cycle, which I think this movie hit the best out of any movie I can remember.

• 11:21Speaker 01

  Yes, yeah.

• 11:22Bill Simmons?

  I'll give you the, I'll give you the steps.

• 11:23Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 11:25Bill Simmons?

  We have chemistry.

• 11:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:28Bill Simmons?

  There's immediate action.

• 11:29Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 11:30Bill Simmons?

  Somebody either plays it cool or has some regrets and they, oh, no, we're, we're, we're doing a makeup game. Let's go again. Start spending time together. Was thinking you could take a drawer.

• 11:42Speaker 01

  Drawer, yeah.

• 11:44Bill Simmons?

  A whole drawer.

• 11:44Speaker 01

  Whole drawer.

• 11:45Bill Simmons?

  A whole drawer, Danny. Now we're moving in. Did we do this too soon?

• 11:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:53Bill Simmons?

  Are we roommates or are we boyfriend and girlfriend? What's going on here?

• 11:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:57Bill Simmons?

  Cause we moved into this weird territory and I don't know if this makes sense anymore.

• 12:00Chris Ryan?

  For 15 minutes.

• 12:01Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 12:02Speaker 01

  I don't know anything about you. We don't really talk.

• 12:04Bill Simmons?

  We get the, the L-bomb, which comes later in this movie, but that's a big one too. Who's gonna say it first?

• 12:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, but there's like the little, the premature ejaculation on the I love you front when in the tub scene.

• 12:15Bill Simmons?

  I love making love.

• 12:16Speaker 01

  I, I love making love. Yeah, but he, he quickly said it in the.

• 12:20Bill Simmons?

  L-bomb, we get, we get the pregnancy scare.

• 12:22Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 12:22Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 12:23Bill Simmons?

  How's he gonna handle it?

• 12:25Speaker 01

  Not well.

• 12:25Bill Simmons?

  And he handles it badly.

• 12:26Speaker 01

  Not well, folks.

• 12:28Bill Simmons?

  We get, it's starting to get a little rocky. The job's starting to get, so we have all that. Are you gonna talk to her about it? Oh, you're not? That's not good. We have the holidays.

• 12:37Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 12:37Bill Simmons?

  How it is, it's like, oh, now we're becoming our parents. Now this isn't going really well either. Um, we get the, I feel like we're a couple of kids playing house conversation and we get the terrible breakup. And then we get the one person regretting it, one person never gonna forgive the other one. Usually the relationship ends.

• 12:57Speaker 01

  Just a touch of stalking as well during that stretch.

• 13:00Bill Simmons?

  It's more than a touch.

• 13:01Speaker 01

  Some light stalking.

• 13:03Bill Simmons?

  I don't even feel like it's an appetizer portion. It's, it's a full entree.

• 13:07Chris Ryan?

  There's so many great details within those moments and within those movements. There's like the dividing up of like, who's bringing what to the new apartment?

• 13:15Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 13:16Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 13:16Chris Ryan?

  There is the, definitely the taking me for granted part when you first start hot and heavy, where it's like, first there's that initial burst of like, I haven't seen my friends in three weeks. This is amazing. And then there's like, wait, I haven't seen my friends in three weeks. This is weird.

• 13:31Bill Simmons?

  My friends are mad at me.

• 13:32Chris Ryan?

  Yeah. And like, I remember when I was started, first started dating Phoebe, who became my wife, we had like a week run or two week run where it was like Chinese food, go to the bar, Chi, like, you know, just, I never left her apartment. I was like, going to my record store job and buying a T-shirt at the Gap because I didn't have any clothes at her place.

• 13:52Speaker 01

  This was your, you're carrying your undies in a bag.

• 13:54Chris Ryan?

  But there was like one day where like, I was like, and so what, what about like, what do you want to do later? What do you want to do tonight? And she was like, this is weird. Like, I feel like we went from like not barely knowing each other to now it's like, oh, what do you want for dinner tonight? It's like that, you have to find the spark. It's too early for there to not to be that spark. And it's funny how there's those ebbs and flows of those relationships. This movie really gets it.

• 14:17Bill Simmons?

  They're also really young.

• 14:19Chris Ryan?

  Well.

• 14:19Speaker 01

  Incredibly young.

• 14:21Chris Ryan?

  That's the thing that I feel like has changed the most.

• 14:24Bill Simmons?

  It's, you know how old they were when they made this?

• 14:26Chris Ryan?

  Well, I, I believe they were like 20, 21 years old.

• 14:28Bill Simmons?

  Rob Lowe was 21, turned 22 when it came out and she's like a year and a half older.

• 14:33Chris Ryan?

  And they're supposed to be like 25 in the movie.

• 14:35Bill Simmons?

  But they, they explain it that he never went to college, so he's in the workforce early, but.

• 14:40Speaker 01

  Even so.

• 14:40Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, like Rob Lowe was in class, the boarding school.

• 14:44Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 14:44Bill Simmons?

  Jacqueline Biss said an Andrew McCarthy movie like four years before this?

• 14:48Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 14:49Bill Simmons?

  As a realistic, like junior, senior in boarding school. It doesn't really matter. If anything, I like that they're younger, playing up versus the way I, they would screw this movie up so many ways now. Like the, they'd be too old, playing younger. The Belushi character would be a disaster. They would have no idea what to do with that character. The, I don't know what the Elizabeth Perkins character would be, but she'd.

• 15:15Speaker 01

  My icon, my icon Joan.

• 15:17Bill Simmons?

  Just mean as a fucking.

• 15:18Speaker 01

  Absolutely love her.

• 15:20Bill Simmons?

  Mean as a shrew. That's the thing, all four, like the worst kind of drawn character is probably the Rob Lowe character. He's just kind of a sponge off everyone else.

• 15:28Speaker 01

  I would say by a comfortable margin, that's true, which is like, one of the things is you revisit it time and time again, then maybe it starts to feel a little bit strange because when you watch it for the first time, much like, and this is like a meta quality to this, much like Debbie, you're just so swept up because he is so beautiful. One of the great moments of the movie, of course, is when Bernie's like, your problem is that you're too good looking. You know, and it does feel like there's actually something to that. Like this person doesn't know how to navigate the world because he's so hot.

• 15:56Bill Simmons?

  Like she talks about it, like how she, multiple times.

• 15:58Chris Ryan?

  Yeah. And it's good because like when his life starts to spin out a little bit, you get the feeling like it might be the first time that's ever happened to him.

• 16:04Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 16:05Chris Ryan?

  It's like the first time this things haven't come easy to me, you know, and yeah.

• 16:08Bill Simmons?

  Part, part of it is his hair, which gets crazier as the movie goes along. It's a little bit of a St. Elmo's Fire haircut.

• 16:14Speaker 01

  Dude, we're in like Teen Wolf territory in a couple of scenes. It's bizarre. Obviously it's the eighties, so there's like the eighties mullet for the Danny character. Debbie has a little bit of the eighties micro bang.

• 16:25Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 16:25Speaker 01

  Mixed in with like the, you know, the, the blown out hair, but his hair gets really, really wonky in a few scenes.

• 16:31Bill Simmons?

  If like Craig showed up with that hair, I'd be like, dude, you gotta talk. What's going on?

• 16:36Speaker 01

  Paired with the shoulder pads and the suits.

• 16:38Chris Ryan?

  You should be promoted.

• 16:39Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 16:40Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 16:40Chris Ryan?

  Do you remember, uh, like when you saw this movie, you were 10? How, how old were you?

• 16:45Bill Simmons?

  No, I was, I was 16.

• 16:47Chris Ryan?

  16.

• 16:48Speaker 01

  Oh, man.

• 16:48Chris Ryan?

  And as you were going into like high school.

• 16:50Bill Simmons?

  By the way, I had a separate history of this movie because I watched General Hospital regularly in the first half of the eighties and Demi Moore was on General Hospital, which is where she became famous. So the fact that she got naked in this movie.

• 17:03Speaker 01

  Huge.

• 17:04Bill Simmons?

  They had to carry me out. I didn't want to talk about it, but I had like, it was like an anaphylaxis. I was put on a stretcher.

• 17:11Chris Ryan?

  They put on the injury chest.

• 17:12Bill Simmons?

  They strapped me in. I gave everybody a thumbs up.

• 17:19Speaker 01

  Still how I feel about it when I watch it now.

• 17:21Chris Ryan?

  Simmons seems to have pulled something. We're gonna go to commercials.

• 17:24Bill Simmons?

  Simmons needs an IV and he'll be back. Yeah, so I had a big history of it.

• 17:29Chris Ryan?

  They're taking Simmons to the juice room.

• 17:30Bill Simmons?

  But the other thing is Rob Lowe was a legitimate, Rob Lowe's in this movie, I want to see it. He reached that point because he had had The Outsiders class, Hotel New Hampshire, which was the one failure. But I liked Oxford Blues. I liked Young Bud and I liked St. Elmo's Fire. And it just felt like, oh, and, and Demi Moore, and she was great. And it just felt like this was gonna be a thing. It was really well marketed. Jim Belushi had been on Saturday Night Live, so knew who he was. And then Perkins was the, whatever. But I, I wrote this down, CR. I think there's only two really truly influential rom-coms ever, and I think this is one of them. I think the other is When Harry Met Sally. I think if you actually look at the DNA of the last 40 years of rom-coms, normal relationship

• 18:13Bill Simmons?

  rom-coms, I think they all crib from this movie.

• 18:16Chris Ryan?

  You don't think it's at Annie Hall?

• 18:17Bill Simmons?

  Is Annie Hall a rom-com though?

• 18:20Chris Ryan?

  I mean, it's a romantic comedy.

• 18:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, of course.

• 18:22Bill Simmons?

  I always feel like the Woody Allen's over here.

• 18:25Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, but I feel like all of these movies are drawing from the idea of like, what if you told a story of a relationship?

• 18:31Bill Simmons?

  But they've, but they've been doing that since the 30s, 40s, 50s.

• 18:34Chris Ryan?

  Sure, yeah.

• 18:34Bill Simmons?

  I'm just talking about like the modern version of these. You think like No Strings Attached?

• 18:39Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 18:39Bill Simmons?

  All the shitty versions of these, they're all like this where it's like, people meet.

• 18:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:43Bill Simmons?

  Now we're about to go on a, and we're gonna get, and somebody's gonna screw it up. And then at the end, there's gonna be a good song.

• 18:48Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 18:49Bill Simmons?

  And they're back together. But when, when Harry Met Sally was the, oh, we're friends. Do you like me more than I like you? What's going on here?

• 18:56Chris Ryan?

  The will dare, won't they?

• 18:57Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. But I just think those are the two diehards of this version.

• 19:01Speaker 01

  Have you workshopped this take with, uh, Littman or Dobbins, you know?

• 19:05Bill Simmons?

  I haven't.

• 19:05Speaker 01

  Rom-com scholars?

• 19:06Bill Simmons?

  Well, what, give me the other.

• 19:08Speaker 01

  I mean, I don't know.

• 19:09Bill Simmons?

  Give me the other last 40 years though.

• 19:11Chris Ryan?

  You're half Hobbit. Who would you know?

• 19:13Speaker 01

  That's the nicest thing you ever said to me, though rude, given that I know you fast forward through the Hobbit scenes in Lord of the Rings.

• 19:19Bill Simmons?

  There's been monster rom-coms, but like Pretty Woman wasn't influencing rom-coms for 35 years, you know? My Best Friend's Wedding. This one is like, the structure of it, I think has been repeated over and over again. And you need the two people and you have the two sidekicks.

• 19:35Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 19:35Speaker 01

  Friend group, yeah.

• 19:36Bill Simmons?

  And like Catherine Han was the Elizabeth Perkins character in four rom-coms or Judy Greer.

• 19:42Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 19:42Bill Simmons?

  You know, and then the Belushi one, it's always like, oh, man, look out for this guy. Whoa, he's gonna make some jokes.

• 19:48Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 19:49Bill Simmons?

  Be offensive. Rob Lowe, head to head battle with Cruz through 1986. One guy had Top Gun in 86, the other had about last night, Cruz takes off, that's it.

• 20:00Speaker 01

  I thought you were about to make the case that that meant Rob Lowe won, based on how you're talking about this movie so far.

• 20:04Bill Simmons?

  No, Top Gun wins. But I, I think he's maybe the most desired guy to get in your movie who's under 25.

• 20:13Chris Ryan?

  At this point.

• 20:14Speaker 01

  At this point.

• 20:15Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Out of all those eighties dudes, because he passes Timothy Hutton.

• 20:18Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 20:19Bill Simmons?

  He passes Emilio Estevez, Judd Nelson, McCarthy, all those dudes. See Thomas Howell? And Cruz, he was ahead of in the billing in The Outsiders.

• 20:31Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 20:32Bill Simmons?

  So, um, and he was the most famous Brat Pack guy, I think.

• 20:37Chris Ryan?

  And also probably the most, was he the most like kind of publicly out there? Like, I'm at the club, I'm, I'm going, I'm dating famous people kind of person?

• 20:46Bill Simmons?

  Yes, and Mallory can attest to this. I would say top five.

• 20:52Bill Simmons?

  Handsome celebrities that all women are like, that guy's handsome.

• 20:57Speaker 01

  Just great looking.

• 20:57Bill Simmons?

  I don't think if anyone said like, Rob Lowe's not great looking.

• 21:00Speaker 01

  No, that would be, that would be absurd.

• 21:02Bill Simmons?

  It's like absurd. Like, how many people have reached his level of handsomeness? Not many.

• 21:07Speaker 01

  No, and you know, in this.

• 21:08Bill Simmons?

  Craig, obviously. I don't know if there's five more.

• 21:10Speaker 01

  Once you break out of New America.

• 21:11Speaker 04

  Wait till you get the mullet.

• 21:11Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 21:12Speaker 01

  Exactly. There's something, I mean, obviously, it's the piercing eyes, most of all. Just all time.

• 21:17Bill Simmons?

  He's got great chin.

• 21:18Speaker 01

  The jawline and the chin. There's like the, just the like little like kind of constellation, the dusting of freckles. This is a great movie because he's routinely, sometimes absurdly shirtless, like when he's, you know, okay, I can't actually have my dick in my hand, so I have a wad of pasta, putting it into boiling water. He uses his left hand to be canonically accurate here. Or I'm standing, I'm so proud of the, the table setting, so I'm gonna like, open my already open shirt to tuck my hands into my pocket so that you, running to get the newspaper on the front stoop and it's tight whiteys. His body.

• 21:52Bill Simmons?

  Coming out of the shower with a towel on.

• 21:54Speaker 01

  I can't wait to talk more about that scene because it is one of the most puzzling towel techniques in the history of film.

• 21:59Chris Ryan?

  It's like a weird, it's like a sash.

• 22:01Speaker 01

  All he does is dry his right hip. That's it. But it's like 57 seconds long. Can't say I timed it, but feels right.

• 22:08Bill Simmons?

  Right, it got really wet.

• 22:09Speaker 01

  The body, his body is, it's like, he's not a bodybuilder. He doesn't look like a professional athlete. You know, he just looks like a. Yeah, he like, looks like he's a guy who's.

• 22:19Bill Simmons?

  Skinny, lean, but wiry.

• 22:20Speaker 01

  Playing in the, in the mother's softball beer league.

• 22:23Chris Ryan?

  And clearly like, like the centerpiece of that team, right?

• 22:27Speaker 01

  Some astonishing infield defense. You know, you care to comment as an all metro player yourself back in the day?

• 22:32Bill Simmons?

  Well, surprisingly, they put him at second base.

• 22:34Speaker 01

  Where would you have put him? Centerfield? Shortstop?

• 22:36Bill Simmons?

  Seemed like a shorter center with his athleticism.

• 22:39Chris Ryan?

  I did not know. I mean, if you want to do the softball stuff now.

• 22:42Bill Simmons?

  No, no, save it.

• 22:43Chris Ryan?

  Okay.

• 22:44Bill Simmons?

  We can do it now.

• 22:45Speaker 01

  Chris brought his computer to his lap. He was so excited to talk about this.

• 22:49Bill Simmons?

  The giant softball?

• 22:50Chris Ryan?

  I didn't know about Chicago softball.

• 22:52Speaker 01

  It was.

• 22:52Bill Simmons?

  Did you know about it?

• 22:53Speaker 04

  No. No what?

• 22:54Speaker 01

  Tell us everything you learned.

• 22:55Chris Ryan?

  It's a 16 inch softball that you're supposed to play without gloves and it kind of compresses when you catch it.

• 23:01Speaker 04

  And that's only a Chicago thing?

• 23:02Chris Ryan?

  And New Orleans.

• 23:03Speaker 01

  Oh, interesting. Oh.

• 23:04Chris Ryan?

  Yeah. I love that. I love it.

• 23:07Bill Simmons?

  I fucking love it. I never knew about it other than this movie.

• 23:10Speaker 01

  Me neither.

• 23:10Bill Simmons?

  And I've wanted to play it my whole life.

• 23:12Speaker 01

  Is that why he's able to toss that ball into like his wall without just the, the drywall crumbling?

• 23:17Chris Ryan?

  I think so, yeah.

• 23:17Speaker 01

  Cause it's a little bit of a softer texture of the ball?

• 23:19Chris Ryan?

  That moment is such a great like.

• 23:21Speaker 04

  Incredible.

• 23:21Chris Ryan?

  Belushi's word invented moment where he's just like, I don't really read so much.

• 23:23Speaker 01

  He'd be doom scrolling TikTok right now. Oh, man.

• 23:27Bill Simmons?

  I think it's harder to really hit those two.

• 23:30Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 23:30Bill Simmons?

  So when Belushi goes deep later, that's like a real achievement. That's why.

• 23:33Speaker 01

  There's some heaviness. There's more mass to that ball. Interesting. So this is like the, the inverse of duck pin bowling in Maryland where you've got the small pins and the small balls, the larger ball. Interesting. Didn't know.

• 23:42Bill Simmons?

  We have that in Massachusetts.

• 23:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:45Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 23:45Speaker 01

  Something we share.

• 23:45Chris Ryan?

  Pin bowling's around. They have that.

• 23:46Speaker 01

  Two things that we share.

• 23:47Bill Simmons?

  Really wing those.

• 23:48Speaker 01

  Adley Rutchman in duck pin bowling.

• 23:50Bill Simmons?

  Switching Adley?

• 23:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:52Chris Ryan?

  How's he doing?

• 23:53Speaker 01

  He just debuted. He was.

• 23:54Bill Simmons?

  Leader of the team.

• 23:55Speaker 01

  He was hurt.

• 23:56Chris Ryan?

  And he's the catcher?

• 23:57Speaker 01

  Swung out spectacularly.

• 23:58Chris Ryan?

  Contreras isn't the catcher anymore?

• 24:00Bill Simmons?

  No, he plays first.

• 24:01Chris Ryan?

  Okay.

• 24:01Speaker 01

  Beloved by his teammates.

• 24:03Bill Simmons?

  One other thing with Rob Lowe, shockingly good IMDb. When you look at like the last 45 years.

• 24:08Speaker 01

  A lot of projects. Sure, yeah.

• 24:09Bill Simmons?

  He kept, it seemed like his career was over at one point and then he kind of rallied back with the Tommy Boy era, then he had the West Wing era.

• 24:16Chris Ryan?

  Well, he's been one of the most dependable television actors for the last 30 years, probably 20, 25 years between Parks and Rec and West, West Wing. And then also doing 911 for several years, like.

• 24:29Bill Simmons?

  Don't forget Dr. Vegas, that last year.

• 24:31Speaker 04

  Don't forget Parks and Rec.

• 24:32Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, you know Rob Lowe as a TV guy, right?

• 24:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:34Speaker 04

  Yeah, definitely. It's, I almost see them as two different people. Like, seeing him in movies like this and then Chris Trager in Parks and Rec.

• 24:40Speaker 01

  I know, it's a different.

• 24:41Chris Ryan?

  And then the third guy is the guy wearing the NFL hat.

• 24:44Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 24:44Speaker 01

  That's, exactly. I do think for a generation, he is Chris Trager. He is the Parks and Rec guy. He is literally.

• 24:51Bill Simmons?

  It's three different generations of him, because the second generation, when he's doing Tommy Boy and Wayne's World and he's all of a sudden reinventing himself as a comedic actor. He was an amazing SNL host.

• 25:00Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 25:01Bill Simmons?

  And it was just like, wow.

• 25:02Chris Ryan?

  And he was kind of trying to put his life back together at that point, right?

• 25:04Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he had the Oscars with Snow White. It was a big disaster for him, but I gotta say, he also wrote a really good autobiography.

• 25:13Chris Ryan?

  Yeah. Didn't you have him on your pod?

• 25:14Bill Simmons?

  I did. He was a very good podcast guest. I talked about this movie with him and with Jim Belushi and Rob Lowe said, it's my favorite thing I've ever done. He said that on the pod. He said that anywhere. He's like, it's the number one thing I've been involved with and and Belushi loved it too. And they both loved the theory that this movie, because I think people think When Harry Met Sally created the modern rom com. This is three years before When Harry Met Sally and it did well. It succeeded. We didn't talk about Demi Moore yet. 23 when this movie released and we're giving her two categories coming out of the gate. The Bam Adebayo 83 point, where the fuck did this performance come from award? And the Peter North award for most effort put into a movie.

• 25:54Speaker 01

  Oh, man. Yeah.

• 25:56Bill Simmons?

  I don't know if anyone's ever put more into a rom com. She's multiple sex scenes, multiple breakdowns, wearing some of the worst clothes.

• 26:05Chris Ryan?

  Wide variety of hairstyles.

• 26:07Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 26:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:08Bill Simmons?

  Just going for it.

• 26:09Speaker 01

  Very special, very memorable.

• 26:10Bill Simmons?

  Give me Demi Moore thoughts, Mal.

• 26:11Speaker 01

  I think she's great in this movie. It's, it's actually like, I think that Debbie is a lunatic. And that there are a number of moments where in the span of a single, not just scene or conversation, but sentence, she swings from measured and balanced into a complete breakdown in a way that is obviously very entertaining to watch. But there are also then on the other end of the spectrum, so many moments where she is like really rooted and grounded in some sort of actual measured perspective and outlook. You know, she believably conveys, I think, a 23, 24 year old person who is like trying to figure out whether she wants to be young and free and fun or try out the next phase of her life with this more serious relationship.

• 26:55Speaker 01

  She's incredibly selfish and self-involved, right, the character? And she also is like mesmerizingly beautiful. She has that kind of, I've got my, my, you know, polo sweater and wavy hair, girl next door quality, but also you're like, she's a fucking freak and I can't wait to find out where those hands went right before we cut away from the beanbag scene and went into the, you know what I mean?

• 27:20Chris Ryan?

  I do know what you mean.

• 27:20Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? It's just great. She's got the husky voice.

• 27:23Bill Simmons?

  Great voice.

• 27:24Speaker 01

  Yeah. I mean, she's just so sexy and winning and charming. And you believe, as you often do with Demi Moore movies, that anyone who looked at her for two seconds would be in love with her.

• 27:33Chris Ryan?

  Of course.

• 27:34Speaker 01

  I mean, she's just an all-timer.

• 27:34Bill Simmons?

  To throw your life aware. Oh, my God.

• 27:36Speaker 01

  Oh, no question.

• 27:37Bill Simmons?

  She had St. Elmo's Fire, Jules, one of my favorite characters of all time.

• 27:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:41Bill Simmons?

  The all-time throw my life aware. I totally would have gone in the hotel room.

• 27:45Chris Ryan?

  Cooked out in a hotel.

• 27:46Bill Simmons?

  Would have saved her from the Saudis. I would have paid her rent.

• 27:51Bill Simmons?

  He would have had money. But she's in that movie with Rob Lowe, who's an even bigger fuck up than her. And then they have the famous scene together. When she, he tries to make a move on her in the Jeep at like four in the morning. We covered this on the rewatch list. And she's like, you break my heart, Billy. Then again, you break everyone's heart. So they have this great moment. Then in this movie, it flips where they're more stable, normal.

• 28:17Chris Ryan?

  Sure.

• 28:18Bill Simmons?

  They're really good together.

• 28:20Chris Ryan?

  Dated briefly.

• 28:21Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 28:21Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, unclear.

• 28:22Chris Ryan?

  But then, like, they're, they're dueling autobiographies, like, I think Rob Lowe's like, we were hot and heavy for a bit and Demi Moore's like, I barely remember this, but I think we have one night together.

• 28:31Bill Simmons?

  I think we hooked up once. They agree they at least hooked up once.

• 28:34Chris Ryan?

  And they, but she then was with Estevez for a while.

• 28:37Bill Simmons?

  Oh, yeah, they were engaged.

• 28:38Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 28:39Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. His, his brat pack buddy.

• 28:43Bill Simmons?

  Best actress in a movie?

• 28:45Chris Ryan?

  Ever?

• 28:45Bill Simmons?

  87 Oscars.

• 28:48Bill Simmons?

  For the 86 year. The winner was Marlee Matlin for Children of Bless or God.

• 28:51Chris Ryan?

  Okay.

• 28:52Speaker 01

  Bye.

• 28:53Bill Simmons?

  Sigourney Weaver in Aliens. Heard that's a good movie scene.

• 28:55Chris Ryan?

  I heard that's a pretty solid performance.

• 28:57Speaker 01

  Sheesh.

• 28:57Bill Simmons?

  Kathleen Turner, Peggy Sue gets married, or Peggy Sue got married. C.C. Spacek, Crimes of the Heart.

• 29:04Chris Ryan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 29:05Speaker 01

  Bye.

• 29:06Bill Simmons?

  And here's the bad one. Jane Fonda for The Morning After.

• 29:08Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 29:09Bill Simmons?

  Classic, just legacy. We should have thrown Demi one on this one. She's doing it all. Her big scene, which I can't wait to talk about. The breakup scene.

• 29:19Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 29:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:22Bill Simmons?

  Who's doing better than that in a scene? Fucking home run. It's like she turns into Meryl Streep. It's like, is that Meryl Streep or Demi Moore?

• 29:29Chris Ryan?

  Nobody in her draft class could do better than that.

• 29:31Bill Simmons?

  No way.

• 29:32Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 29:34Speaker 01

  She's not my pick for who should get an Oscar from this movie, with respect.

• 29:37Bill Simmons?

  Oh, I can't wait.

• 29:38Speaker 01

  It's definitely Perkins.

• 29:40Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 29:40Speaker 01

  I, I think, without question. That performance is electric. Every single moment from Joan is historic.

• 29:51Chris Ryan?

  It's really cool how this movie is about, and it makes no bones about like, these two characters are the main characters. And if anything, I think St. Elmo's Fire, for instance, is like hamstrung by the fact that they're like, oh, well, we gotta go to Vermont with Emilio Estevez while he tries to chase down Andy McDowell.

• 30:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:07Chris Ryan?

  This is like, this is a movie about their relationship, but yeah, the two more interesting people.

• 30:12Speaker 01

  No question.

• 30:13Chris Ryan?

  Are their friends.

• 30:13Speaker 01

  Are Bernie and Joan. No question.

• 30:14Chris Ryan?

  And they're the Greek chorus who are gonna talk about like their mindsets and like the way people think about the opposite sex and the way people think about dating.

• 30:22Bill Simmons?

  It really taps into something that movies have tried to do and usually fuck up of when the friends resent the relationship.

• 30:29Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 30:29Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 30:30Bill Simmons?

  And it's been a theme forever, but this one does it really well. Like Joan's an active terrorist for this relationship.

• 30:36Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 30:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:37Bill Simmons?

  But you kind of see it from her side. She doesn't want to lose, lose her friend. Maybe she doesn't like Danny that much. And then Bernie just wants his running mate. Like, that's all he cares about.

• 30:47Speaker 01

  I think they're all very selfish. They're all very nakedly selfish. The thing that makes that work, I, I feel like, I was curious actually to get Craig's opinion on this, because I feel like a modern audience might find that part of the movie, like the fact that everybody's actually a really bad friend, like a slightly tougher hang now? Because maybe people have less patience for that with each other, but it feels very true to life to me.

• 31:10Chris Ryan?

  There's one thing that really, I think, probably has echoed on after this era.

• 31:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 31:15Chris Ryan?

  Is the idea that when you're young, you're like kind of on guard against anything ever changing, because you're like, we're all agreeing to have bad jobs and like go out every night, right? And then the first person who's like, yeah, I'm gonna grow up. You're like, oh shit, that's an indictment of me, right? And I love that Joan kind of manipulates Deb and is like, you know, you're, I bet you're the, the kind of girl who just drops her friends like a hot potato when as soon as she gets a boyfriend.

• 31:40Speaker 01

  And Deb is like, doesn't everyone?

• 31:41Chris Ryan?

  She's like, doesn't everybody? And she's like, well, I don't, but then again, I don't have that many dates. And it's like, she's manipulating.

• 31:45Speaker 01

  I mean, Joan is fucking a new dude every night.

• 31:47Bill Simmons?

  Banging through Chicago.

• 31:49Chris Ryan?

  But that is a person, though, right? That is like a real person who's just like, no, like, if we're friends and we're roommates, like, you're in, you're in this with me.

• 31:56Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 31:56Chris Ryan?

  And it's just like a really, really good characterization.

• 31:58Bill Simmons?

  Like when you met, you started hanging out with Phoebe and Klosterman was like, tits and ass, tits and ass. Bloody blue, bloody blue.

• 32:07Chris Ryan?

  The original title for Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs was tits and ass, tits and ass.

• 32:11Bill Simmons?

  Perkins is a home run.

• 32:12Speaker 01

  She's unbelievable.

• 32:13Bill Simmons?

  And then she's in big two years later.

• 32:15Chris Ryan?

  Yep.

• 32:16Bill Simmons?

  And then goes to jail for her crimes against young Josh Baskin.

• 32:20Speaker 01

  Indeed.

• 32:20Bill Simmons?

  But by staying outside his house after.

• 32:23Speaker 01

  One of my favorite podcast conversations that we've ever had.

• 32:26Bill Simmons?

  Screenplays from Tim Kaczynski and Dennis, Donista Clu. Kaczynski, who was on SNL forever.

• 32:32Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 32:33Bill Simmons?

  I knew him. He was on the Eddie Murphy cast. Big Belushi friend. And this, that step on casting what ifs was, this was always supposed to be an accurate. Belushi thing was always the thought.

• 32:44Chris Ryan?

  Okay.

• 32:44Bill Simmons?

  In the early eighties, then Belushi died. And then it went to, uh, Jimbo was a legendary play. Belushi played Bernie in the play.

• 32:52Chris Ryan?

  Yeah. William Macy did it for a while early on.

• 32:56Bill Simmons?

  Also, like, I took one play, playwright in class in college where we had to like do different scenes and stuff. But this was like one of the plays that they would always use because the dialogue was so good. So it was like, oh, I'm going to do a scene. I think everybody probably did some version of their first scene. If you're just like, oh, me and CR have playwright, our playwright class.

• 33:15Chris Ryan?

  We're gonna get up on stage and go tits and ass, tits and ass.

• 33:17Bill Simmons?

  We're just gonna do sexual perversity. Ed Zwick, this was his first movie. He was a Chicago guy and said, uh, I actually got his, uh, his book. Hoping for more insights. He got, he got one good one. But, uh, but yeah, he was a big Chicago guy. Let's do a lot of stuff. Eight point five million dollar budget made thirty eight point seven million. Pretty good for nineteen eighty six.

• 33:37Chris Ryan?

  Do you happen to have eighty six box office like handy right there?

• 33:40Bill Simmons?

  I mean, I can get it.

• 33:42Chris Ryan?

  I saw that this was like the twenty fifth ranked box office movie of that year, and I just was kind of curious.

• 33:47Speaker 01

  And like the, like the tenth R rated, right? Or something like that?

• 33:50Chris Ryan?

  I just feel like we were, we were living well back then.

• 33:53Bill Simmons?

  It was a big summer movie and it was a big like high school. You know, it was, it's an R if you're under eighteen, so can I get in?

• 34:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, there's right.

• 34:01Bill Simmons?

  And then it's a date movie.

• 34:02Speaker 01

  Something illicit about it.

• 34:03Bill Simmons?

  It had something for everybody. Well, oh, man. We just, Kyle and I just did this when we did Karate Kid two, which was the fourth movie of nineteen eighty six. About Last Night was twenty sixth. But yeah, we've done half of these at this point.

• 34:17Chris Ryan?

  Have we? Aliens is up there, right?

• 34:20Bill Simmons?

  Not Police Academy three. That's gonna be like season twenty seven of the rewatchable.

• 34:24Chris Ryan?

  Blind Police Academy three. That's what's up.

• 34:27Bill Simmons?

  A lot of good comedies. Stand by me was this year. Cobra. Done it all. So one of the big pleasant surprises of this podcast, Roger Ebert.

• 34:35Speaker 01

  This is just an all time Ebert review. All time.

• 34:39Bill Simmons?

  Four stars. Four.

• 34:43Bill Simmons?

  He said, it's one of the rarest of recent American movies because it deals fearlessly with real people. Instead of with special effects. He shits on San Olmos fire and then says, this is the movie San Olmos fire should have been. About Last Night gives them, to me and Rob Loh, Rob Lowe, the best acting opportunities either one has ever had. They make the most of them. And then he says, why is that that love stories are so rare from Hollywood these days? Have we lost faith in romance? This is what I'm saying. And people stopped talking.

• 35:15Chris Ryan?

  I was surprised to read this review because I thought he was gonna be like, they've desecrated Mamet's incredible.

• 35:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 35:23Chris Ryan?

  Play. But no.

• 35:24Bill Simmons?

  You know what? He loves character and he loves story.

• 35:27Speaker 01

  That's right. That's right.

• 35:30Bill Simmons?

  He said, it's a warm hearted and intelligent love story and one of the year's best movies.

• 35:35Speaker 01

  Warm hearted. I don't know if I totally agree with that. I'm not sure I would describe this movie as warm hearted.

• 35:41Bill Simmons?

  Counter.

• 35:41Speaker 01

  I think this movie.

• 35:42Bill Simmons?

  Living inside my heart now.

• 35:45Speaker 01

  I don't know. Being greeted on your doorstep today by you two just regaling me with song was honestly really special. That was great. I think this movie, part of its charm to me is that it's kind of like acid dipped, you know? It has an edge, not as much of an edge as the plays, you know? Yeah. Yeah. There's something like unvarnished deliberately about it.

• 36:04Chris Ryan?

  The play makes you want to blow your brains out at the end. This is, this is somewhat uplifting.

• 36:08Speaker 01

  Yeah. Too uplifting at the end? We'll get to it.

• 36:11Bill Simmons?

  Raj took a shot at Top Gun. He said, Top Gun was so afraid of a real relationship that its real love affair was with airplanes. And he's like, we should make more like About Last Night. And then guess what? We made forty years of About Last Night's. Keep making them, making them. They're on streamers every week.

• 36:27Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 36:28Bill Simmons?

  Now we're making movies where you only have one night to have sex with somebody.

• 36:32Speaker 01

  I can't, I can't wait. I can't wait to see that.

• 36:33Chris Ryan?

  Rom coms have gotten like, I think probably increasingly high concept.

• 36:38Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 36:38Chris Ryan?

  But what we really want is like guy meets a girl or whatever and then goes forward, you know?

• 36:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:45Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 36:46Speaker 01

  Just the, the tale is all this time.

• 36:48Chris Ryan?

  Two crazy kids.

• 36:49Speaker 01

  You know what other tale is as old as time is I want to go real fast. Top Gun fucking rules.

• 36:53Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, Top Gun was great.

• 36:54Speaker 01

  Come on.

• 36:55Bill Simmons?

  All right, we're taking a break and then we'll do, uh, most rewatchable scenes.

• 36:59Bill Simmons?

  This episode is brought to you by Chat GPT. Imagine you're running a professional sports team. Nice. That'd be a dream of mine. Imagine the player contract report is due today. Not so nice. You've got performance notes from the coaching staff. You got a salary spreadsheet from your analyst. Three rounds of back and forth emails with the agent and all of it is scattered absolutely everywhere. Well, that's where Chat GPT work comes in. It's a new way to use Chat GPT for bigger multi-step projects. Give Chat GPT work access to your apps and files and can create real work documents. For instance, spreadsheets, slides, structured reports. You can bring all those to your next meeting and when you don't need answers, you need help just getting the work across the finish line.

• 37:45Bill Simmons?

  Guess what? Chat GPT work can move your projects forward while you stay in control. Put Chat GPT to work on your most ambitious ideas and projects. Get started. Just go to chatgpt.com by selecting work mode available on plus and pro plans. This episode is brought to you by Quince. Finding a decent piece of clothing can be a lot harder than finding a decent movie, but that was before Quince. Quince has staple pieces made from premium materials like one hundred percent Mongolian cashmere. And everything is priced fifty to eighty percent less than similar brands. It's the perfect place to start building a cozy fall outfit without any absurd markups.

• 38:29Bill Simmons?

  For instance, I love a good vest. They have a lightweight down packable puffer vest, which is an easy fall layer, although nobody loves layers more than Chris Ryan. You can throw it over a sweater, long sleeve, whenever you want to make an outfit feel a little more seasonal, simple, classic. One of those pieces that works with pretty much everything that's already in your closet. Find your next fall favorites at Quince. Download the Quince app for app exclusive offers or go to quince.com. Get free shipping on your order, three hundred sixty five day returns now available in Canada and the UK too. And when Quince asks where you heard about them, let them know it's a rewatchables podcast. They would appreciate that. It's the best way to support the show. Most rewatchables. I have a lot. I basically just put that in the whole movie, but opening scene, was she a pro?

• 39:14Bill Simmons?

  Belushi's just hitting tape measure homers.

• 39:18Chris Ryan?

  Done this material before.

• 39:19Bill Simmons?

  Tape measure homers.

• 39:21Speaker 01

  It's so vulgar right away. It really acclimates you perfectly. Not only into like the rhythm of their friendship and the currency of kind of swapping these tales of conquest, but just that this is a hard R rom com.

• 39:33Bill Simmons?

  We should have said that earlier. The two friendships in this really feel like real friendships.

• 39:39Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. Yes.

• 39:40Bill Simmons?

  Like, it's clear that Belushi and Rob Lowe have probably hung out off the set for the entire time they made the movie.

• 39:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 39:46Bill Simmons?

  And then the two women, like, I don't know, they just seem like authentic friends that have the same up and downs and little petty dumb shit, but have each other's back.

• 39:54Chris Ryan?

  But have that, they have that quality of like, um, when Belushi and Lowe meet up on the rooftop.

• 40:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 40:00Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 40:01Chris Ryan?

  And it's kind of like, hey, man, like, we were friends at work, but like, don't, don't bust my chops and don't talk about Deb anymore like that. Like it, there is that like gradations of like, how close are these guys?

• 40:11Bill Simmons?

  Right.

• 40:11Chris Ryan?

  Or do they just go out every night?

• 40:12Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 40:13Bill Simmons?

  I'm combining the next rewatchable scene, the softball scene into the bar.

• 40:17Chris Ryan?

  Into mothers.

• 40:18Speaker 01

  Unbelievable stuff.

• 40:19Bill Simmons?

  Let's cover the softball scene quickly.

• 40:21Chris Ryan?

  Sure.

• 40:22Speaker 01

  Great.

• 40:22Bill Simmons?

  Everybody's just going down to watch the game. Just people from the office.

• 40:26Speaker 01

  I mean, if the hottest guy in town is tapping the keg like that, who's not showing up to watch?

• 40:31Bill Simmons?

  Like, if we had a ringer softball team, would just ringer staffers come down with beers? And then like I strike out to end the game and somebody comes up and I'm like, not right now.

• 40:42Speaker 01

  Probably.

• 40:42Chris Ryan?

  If we lived in a city where it wasn't like, cool, see you in fifty six minutes after I get done.

• 40:47Speaker 01

  On the five.

• 40:47Chris Ryan?

  Driving through bumper to bumper forest fires.

• 40:50Bill Simmons?

  Our games in Sherman Oaks today. Good luck.

• 40:53Chris Ryan?

  It's a hundred and twelve degrees and two hours away.

• 40:57Bill Simmons?

  If, would, would you, do you see any scenario where people would just go to a softball game on a Tuesday night?

• 41:03Chris Ryan?

  This is why I said this is the world I want to live in. This is, this is the perfect environment. There's nothing else.

• 41:08Speaker 01

  When I lived in New York and worked at Sports Illustrated, we had, we were in the, uh, Zog Sports Whiffleball League and Bowling League. This is a thing that people used to do, but we would get on the subway to go home.

• 41:21Bill Simmons?

  We did have ringer basketball. I have a team photo of it.

• 41:23Speaker 01

  Right. Yeah.

• 41:24Bill Simmons?

  I remember being obsessed with Letterman show. And he showed a picture once of like their softball game and it was the Letterman team. And I was like, I'd fucking kill someone right now to be a Letterman right there someday and be in the softball game with the Letterman guys to say like.

• 41:38Speaker 01

  Guys, there's nothing stopping us from starting a ringer softball team if we want to. Literally nothing.

• 41:43Chris Ryan?

  So where's the, where's the softball team gonna play?

• 41:46Speaker 01

  As you know, I've been working on my release point.

• 41:48Bill Simmons?

  But this is, you're gonna say the valley. And Bill and I are not going to the valley. And some people are gonna say like northeast LA.

• 41:54Speaker 01

  Is there somewhere near the office?

• 41:57Bill Simmons?

  I don't think it's possible in LA.

• 41:59Speaker 04

  What? What are you talking about?

• 42:01Speaker 01

  This is bullshit.

• 42:01Chris Ryan?

  If we all lived around each other, we would be able to decide. But nobody lives around each other.

• 42:04Speaker 04

  There's more space in like the mid-city or something. You could probably find a field in mid-city.

• 42:08Speaker 01

  Nobody's going to mid-city.

• 42:09Bill Simmons?

  I think on Wednesday nights are available at Heroin Needle Park. Get some games going there.

• 42:16Bill Simmons?

  Bernie's Homer.

• 42:17Speaker 01

  Is incredible.

• 42:19Bill Simmons?

  Grabs the girl rounding third. He's got a cigarette.

• 42:23Speaker 01

  The cigarette.

• 42:23Bill Simmons?

  Throws her on the floor, dumps the cigarette. It's like, what world are we in? He's violating that. It's H- nine HR violations.

• 42:31Speaker 01

  Going up to bat with the cigarette in his mouth is just incredible. Effortlessly cool.

• 42:38Chris Ryan?

  Babe Ruth used to do it that way.

• 42:39Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 42:40Bill Simmons?

  And then them showing the bench, everybody celebrating. And then all of a sudden, we're at Mothers and we get Pat's going in for the kill.

• 42:47Speaker 01

  Fucking Pat.

• 42:48Chris Ryan?

  Malali, man.

• 42:49Speaker 01

  I did not know that.

• 42:51Chris Ryan?

  I have.

• 42:52Speaker 01

  Or I forgot, but I-

• 42:53Chris Ryan?

  I have some thoughts on that.

• 42:54Speaker 01

  Me too.

• 42:56Speaker 01

  Incredible.

• 42:57Chris Ryan?

  Junior varsity, like throw your life away right there.

• 43:00Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 43:02Bill Simmons?

  You want to do this now, CR?

• 43:05Speaker 01

  I mean, she's the best.

• 43:08Chris Ryan?

  Did he belong with Pat is what I'm wondering.

• 43:11Bill Simmons?

  How about this?

• 43:11Speaker 01

  Passionate kiss.

• 43:12Bill Simmons?

  I never, I've seen this movie a million times. I never realized it was Megan Mullaly.

• 43:16Speaker 01

  This is the first time I realized it as well.

• 43:20Speaker 01

  This is why you can't do blind months. You have to actually look at the IMTP page.

• 43:24Bill Simmons?

  She's just a bar bimbo. Like the moment there's blood in the water for Danny, she doesn't care. This is one of her best friends. She's like, let's dance.

• 43:31Chris Ryan?

  But she's, she's Les Rouski out there for this movie. She is-

• 43:36Speaker 01

  She's hitting 105?

• 43:37Chris Ryan?

  Fucking fiery. And she's like, Tommy John surgery is tomorrow. We're going.

• 43:45Speaker 01

  Push notification, 36 pitches north of 104 today.

• 43:48Bill Simmons?

  Every scene, she's doing this with her elbow, just trying to get to the end of the movie.

• 43:52Speaker 01

  It's amazing.

• 43:53Bill Simmons?

  Pat's going in for the kill with the hair toss and then mocking her.

• 43:56Speaker 01

  Her friends mocking her because they're all terrible friends.

• 43:58Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, great stuff. We also get the, you know what your problem is? Your face.

• 44:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, just amazing.

• 44:05Bill Simmons?

  And then we get, there's a clock behind your head.

• 44:07Speaker 01

  Really funny. The first Mother scene, it really feels like they are all feral animals in a pit. Like sniffing each other's asses, the pheromones. It gives you that sense of like, it's a movie very much rooted in the individual relationship, but there's this collective fervor to fuck each other. And you just feel it so palpably in that scene. It's amazing.

• 44:27Bill Simmons?

  Craig wants to go back. Mothers?

• 44:30Speaker 01

  Mothers looks like a great bar.

• 44:31Speaker 04

  Mothers is like a top five movie bar, I think. It is really the-

• 44:35Speaker 01

  Oh, my god.

• 44:36Bill Simmons?

  I had that for later. I don't know if you can do much better than Mothers.

• 44:40Chris Ryan?

  It depends on what you're looking for at a bar.

• 44:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 44:42Speaker 04

  What's great about movie bars, and it's unfortunately unrealistic, is like, there's no way that on New Year's Eve, that you can just decide to go to the local bar in a big city at like 11:00 PM and just walk in and it's perfectly crowded.

• 44:55Chris Ryan?

  Crush street.

• 44:56Speaker 04

  There's just like, that's why movie bars are movie bars, but it's, it's perfect.

• 45:01Chris Ryan?

  Would you go Mothers over the bar in the verdict?

• 45:06Bill Simmons?

  What's my end game? What am I looking for every day?

• 45:08Chris Ryan?

  I think that the idea is like, the bar in the verdict is where you go to die, right? Like, that's where you go to like-

• 45:12Bill Simmons?

  Bar in the verdict, it's like, my career's almost over.

• 45:14Chris Ryan?

  Eat roast beef and eat eggs and then drink 47 beers while you play pinball.

• 45:19Speaker 01

  Sounds great. Protein rich.

• 45:21Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, but Mothers is where you maybe go to meet the next Mrs. Simmons, you know?

• 45:27Bill Simmons?

  The town where Jon Hamm, that bar. That's like kind of the middle ground of those two worlds.

• 45:32Speaker 04

  Same almost bar is great.

• 45:33Speaker 01

  It is.

• 45:34Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 45:34Speaker 01

  This is a crowded field.

• 45:35Bill Simmons?

  Same almost bar has food, though.

• 45:38Chris Ryan?

  Same almost, it feels a little bit like a Friday's.

• 45:40Bill Simmons?

  Mothers is like, just come here and get sloshed.

• 45:42Speaker 01

  There's popcorn. We know there's popcorn at Mothers, but beyond that.

• 45:45Bill Simmons?

  It's like a bar where the guy, first of all, is named Mother for some reason. And then is just there all the time at all hours, ready to engage and do shots.

• 45:54Speaker 01

  Sometimes he has a bear's helmet on.

• 45:55Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. This guy does not exist in real life.

• 45:57Chris Ryan?

  In my research, it seems like Mothers has veered off towards becoming a nightclub now. So it's mostly like, it's a Beetham night on Tuesday, you know?

• 46:05Speaker 01

  Oh, no.

• 46:06Bill Simmons?

  I thought Mothers, I had this in my research, was in, they filmed all those scenes at Brentwood.

• 46:11Chris Ryan?

  Maybe they did, but there is a Mother Malone's.

• 46:13Bill Simmons?

  There was a bar called-

• 46:13Chris Ryan?

  Original Mothers in Chicago.

• 46:15Bill Simmons?

  There was a bar called Moms in Brentwood, where they filmed a lot of it.

• 46:18Speaker 04

  Wait, Moms in LA?

• 46:19Bill Simmons?

  In Brentwood.

• 46:21Speaker 04

  Oh, weird, because there's a Moms in Santa Monica. Is it not that?

• 46:24Bill Simmons?

  Maybe that's what the research meant.

• 46:28Speaker 04

  Wow.

• 46:30Speaker 04

  I've been to Moms a lot.

• 46:32Bill Simmons?

  Did it look like this place?

• 46:33Speaker 04

  Not really, but I don't know, maybe they sent you this.

• 46:35Bill Simmons?

  The double date.

• 46:38Bill Simmons?

  You're a very attractive woman. Has anyone told you that?

• 46:42Speaker 01

  This is amazing, yeah.

• 46:44Bill Simmons?

  I'm a neurosurgeon. I'm the heavyweight champion of the world.

• 46:47Chris Ryan?

  Nice to meet you, champ.

• 46:48Speaker 01

  I don't know. Those two are the best. They're the best.

• 46:51Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I honestly, you could have had 20 more minutes just with them interacting.

• 46:54Speaker 01

  They're the best.

• 46:55Bill Simmons?

  Interesting broad, words she'd of upper personality, a car crash.

• 47:02Speaker 01

  Looks like I got the dogs.

• 47:03Bill Simmons?

  Such a great hang.

• 47:04Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 47:05Bill Simmons?

  This is as far as this goes tonight, and then they're going at it again. Next scene, the montage date.

• 47:11Chris Ryan?

  Falling in love.

• 47:12Speaker 01

  Wonderful stuff. Skip and work.

• 47:14Bill Simmons?

  So good. We've been living on the-

• 47:18Chris Ryan?

  So that's Art Institute.

• 47:20Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 47:21Chris Ryan?

  The Cubs from the roof.

• 47:22Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 47:22Chris Ryan?

  And going to the swallow for the first time.

• 47:25Bill Simmons?

  I was gonna do this now, CR. Cubs game in the across the street location. Very tough to get. Art museum, diner date.

• 47:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 47:34Bill Simmons?

  Little vulnerability, I've always wanted to open my own place.

• 47:36Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 47:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 47:37Chris Ryan?

  And then she says, I love this joint.

• 47:40Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 47:40Chris Ryan?

  Oh, she sees me for who I am.

• 47:41Bill Simmons?

  Don't forget, CR.

• 47:42Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 47:43Bill Simmons?

  The later night lake walk.

• 47:45Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 47:45Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 47:46Bill Simmons?

  To cap it off.

• 47:47Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 47:48Bill Simmons?

  Best one, best one day date ever in a movie?

• 47:52Chris Ryan?

  I think Before Sunrise still has this one.

• 47:54Speaker 01

  There's no question the answer is Before Sunrise.

• 47:56Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, you're right.

• 47:57Speaker 01

  No question.

• 47:58Chris Ryan?

  You get Vienna. I'd take Vienna over Chicago, I think.

• 48:00Speaker 04

  Obsession goes pretty well for the first day.

• 48:05Speaker 01

  Haven't seen it. Craig.

• 48:09Bill Simmons?

  Mallory can't see it because of the cat situation.

• 48:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, no, you told me that you thought I could watch that movie. And then Adam watched it and he was like, I can't believe Bill told you that you could watch this movie. There's cat violence.

• 48:22Chris Ryan?

  Fair.

• 48:24Bill Simmons?

  Debbie tells Joan she's moving in. I give it two months.

• 48:28Bill Simmons?

  Leading to the move in.

• 48:29Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 48:29Bill Simmons?

  And Joan being a bitch. And I like when Belushi's kind of tiptoeing around, holding this like one lamp.

• 48:36Speaker 01

  The moving scene is just, it's just an incredible sequence. Incredible. I'm supposed to rend and torture myself anally? Is that what you're into? Does Deborah know about this?

• 48:46Bill Simmons?

  And then we go right into another montage. The we've moved in together.

• 48:52Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 48:52Speaker 01

  This montage will be-

• 48:53Bill Simmons?

  We got a natural love.

• 48:55Speaker 01

  Some Bob Seeger. This will be coming up in a lot of the categories, this montage. This is a very, very powerful but confusing stretch.

• 49:01Chris Ryan?

  This is just the moving in montage, because then there is the like-

• 49:04Bill Simmons?

  This is, montage number two is the moving in, we've got a natural love.

• 49:08Chris Ryan?

  Right.

• 49:08Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 49:08Chris Ryan?

  Montage number three is getting closer, the fitted sheet.

• 49:13Speaker 01

  Yes, the living inside my heart, Bob Seeger stretch.

• 49:16Chris Ryan?

  The long fucking scene, her smoothing out the fitted sheet.

• 49:18Bill Simmons?

  That's our next scene.

• 49:19Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 49:19Speaker 01

  The post-fight montage.

• 49:21Bill Simmons?

  Debbie tries to wake him up, can't.

• 49:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 49:24Bill Simmons?

  Starts going through his shit. He wakes up. I don't want to be your roommate. Uh-oh, Bob Seeger's playing.

• 49:30Chris Ryan?

  It's actually Scott Bennett, but yeah. It's not Bob Seeger.

• 49:33Bill Simmons?

  That's not Bob Seeger?

• 49:34Chris Ryan?

  I don't think so.

• 49:35Bill Simmons?

  I always thought it was Bob Seeger.

• 49:36Speaker 01

  Living inside my heart, Bob Seeger, isn't it?

• 49:37Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, I think it's Bob Seeger. No, it's Scott Bennett, isn't it?

• 49:40Bill Simmons?

  No, in the song, in the movie, it's Bob Seeger. I don't think it's on Spotify. On Spotify, it's Scott Bennett. It's Bob Seeger.

• 49:48Chris Ryan?

  Okay.

• 49:50Bill Simmons?

  It's living inside my heart now. And then, uh,

• 49:55Bill Simmons?

  these two go to town on each other, Mal. I don't know when we want to break this down. Oh, we have a spot later.

• 50:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, you name the time.

• 50:02Chris Ryan?

  Whole section, yeah. She's good.

• 50:04Bill Simmons?

  This was an enormous scene for teens in the 80s. I'm just gonna leave it there.

• 50:08Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 50:09Bill Simmons?

  Thanksgiving dinner, into the bathroom fight.

• 50:13Speaker 01

  This is so good. I love this scene.

• 50:16Bill Simmons?

  Could have gone 10 more minutes. She baked us a pie. She calls him the vulgarian friend.

• 50:24Bill Simmons?

  Well, it's official, I've become my mother, is something that everybody hits that stage.

• 50:29Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 50:29Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 50:29Bill Simmons?

  They're like, wow, I'm an adult now. This sucks.

• 50:33Bill Simmons?

  And then we get the fight. She finds out about the boss. We have that whole thing. Brief one, the kindergarten class. When she's talking about the Virgin Mary, just Elizabeth Perkins cooking.

• 50:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 50:44Bill Simmons?

  Debbie flips out on the boss. I have another one.

• 50:46Chris Ryan?

  At the Christmas party.

• 50:47Bill Simmons?

  I would have 10 kids with this guy.

• 50:49Speaker 01

  Incredibly normal thing to say.

• 50:50Bill Simmons?

  Does he love you? I don't know.

• 50:55Bill Simmons?

  Good snowy subway shots here. Was that a great shot Gordo for you?

• 50:58Chris Ryan?

  I had a different great shot Gordo.

• 51:00Speaker 01

  Same.

• 51:00Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 51:00Bill Simmons?

  Mothers on New Year's Eve, I'm gonna be the refrigerator, you be Peyton.

• 51:04Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 51:05Bill Simmons?

  Right in 1986 with that one.

• 51:07Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 51:07Bill Simmons?

  Bernie's doing the double shots.

• 51:09Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 51:09Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 51:10Bill Simmons?

  Ever done this?

• 51:11Chris Ryan?

  I have not.

• 51:12Bill Simmons?

  You ever done the double, two bottles of one shots?

• 51:14Speaker 04

  Uh, I've done like the Christmas shot where it's like the peppermint schnapps with the whiskey or whatever. I've done that.

• 51:19Speaker 01

  But were you leaning backwards over a bar with somebody pouring them right into your mouth?

• 51:22Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 51:23Speaker 01

  Classic Craig.

• 51:25Bill Simmons?

  Bernie probably drove home that night after that.

• 51:27Chris Ryan?

  I know, it's terrifying.

• 51:28Bill Simmons?

  1986.

• 51:30Speaker 04

  I mean, there's a scene where the two of them are just like free chugging bottles of whiskey.

• 51:33Chris Ryan?

  They're drinking like fucking Fireball while they're walking around like the river in negative 10, just being like tits.

• 51:41Bill Simmons?

  We had Debbie's friend Pat hitting on Danny.

• 51:44Speaker 01

  I mean.

• 51:45Bill Simmons?

  Dance with me!

• 51:46Chris Ryan?

  This is my most rewatchable scene, which is New Year's Eve. It's the, it's the New Year's Eve.

• 51:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 51:51Bill Simmons?

  It's a tortoise.

• 51:52Chris Ryan?

  We're gonna make dinner at home and try to pretend like this is where we're at in our lives.

• 51:56Speaker 01

  Help you guys.

• 51:57Chris Ryan?

  The second the phone rings, we go out.

• 51:59Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 51:59Chris Ryan?

  Joan needs you, Pat's flirting with you, Joan's such a bitch, she's always trying to break us up, breakup.

• 52:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:06Chris Ryan?

  Awesome breakup.

• 52:07Speaker 01

  You guys are using flirting pretty liberally. They kiss.

• 52:13Chris Ryan?

  Well, I just don't understand why Deb doesn't fucking gut Pat right there.

• 52:17Speaker 01

  I know, they're like hanging out later.

• 52:19Bill Simmons?

  Let me read you a Pat quote. I bet you're terrific and I know I am. That's like fucking, yeah, Mizerowski level.

• 52:29Speaker 01

  Love the energy. I love the energy from Pat.

• 52:32Chris Ryan?

  You hear it at the glove from a mile away.

• 52:34Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 52:35Chris Ryan?

  Uh, Jacob's warming up.

• 52:37Bill Simmons?

  Then Joan melts down and the hooks are out. And then, uh, my most rewatchable scene, the breakup.

• 52:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's really good.

• 52:45Bill Simmons?

  This is just an incredible breakup scene.

• 52:47Chris Ryan?

  Danny in the dark.

• 52:49Bill Simmons?

  And she goes, here we go. It really feels like they're breaking up.

• 52:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:54Bill Simmons?

  One corny moment, which I think goes to the, uh, Earn This William Goldman Award. She turns the light on and she's like, mind if I turn this on? Cause we've been in the dark long enough.

• 53:03Speaker 01

  Not the best.

• 53:04Bill Simmons?

  Goldman's like, I'd cut that. Um, I don't love you anymore.

• 53:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 53:13Bill Simmons?

  And she like gasps, like the.

• 53:15Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 53:16Bill Simmons?

  Soul leaves her body for a second.

• 53:18Chris Ryan?

  I love that that's how bad this breakup is so that when he goes after her and starts chasing her across Chicago, she's like, fuck you.

• 53:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, there could be a lot of time to get over this.

• 53:26Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 53:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 53:27Bill Simmons?

  I don't know if there's ever been a better breakup that I can remember in a movie where you're like, oh my God, I think that it's, I feel like I'm actually watching two people break up.

• 53:35Chris Ryan?

  I think that when, uh.

• 53:36Bill Simmons?

  Marriage story?

• 53:37Chris Ryan?

  Hannah finds Ralph watching his television.

• 53:43Bill Simmons?

  Fine, I'm gone, it's done. Great step. The memoir is unbelievable in this scene.

• 53:49Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 53:50Speaker 01

  Really fun.

• 53:50Bill Simmons?

  Really great. Uh, and then I don't even know what to do with the end of it.

• 53:54Chris Ryan?

  Danny gets a bunch of strange.

• 53:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 53:56Chris Ryan?

  Danny opens up a diner.

• 53:57Bill Simmons?

  I like when he shows up at Mothers with, uh, Belushi again and he's like the cognac, horses, fresh horses for our men.

• 54:06Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 54:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 54:07Bill Simmons?

  Um, the one night stand from hell, married affair lady.

• 54:11Speaker 01

  That's so funny.

• 54:12Bill Simmons?

  Don't ever lose your sense of humor, Dan. Don't ever. Uh, and then we get the St. Patrick's Day.

• 54:18Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 54:19Bill Simmons?

  Got an obsession. I don't know where they found these 80s socks.

• 54:25Speaker 01

  It's quite a soundtrack.

• 54:27Bill Simmons?

  And she goes out, goes off on him in the rain.

• 54:30Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 54:31Bill Simmons?

  You had it. I gave you love.

• 54:33Speaker 01

  I love that moment. It's great.

• 54:35Chris Ryan?

  Really nice detail in that is that when the movie starts, it's her first time to Mothers and then it, after the breakup, she's like, you gotta stop coming to my bars.

• 54:46Bill Simmons?

  Right.

• 54:46Chris Ryan?

  Like she's taking Mothers.

• 54:47Speaker 01

  I don't wanna have to start drinking in the suburbs.

• 54:49Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 54:49Speaker 01

  Great line.

• 54:51Bill Simmons?

  Bernie and Joan, something happens there.

• 54:53Speaker 01

  We'll be coming back to that in another category.

• 54:55Bill Simmons?

  Bernie brings him the stuff. That's great, Dan. I tell you, I'm a thief, you call me a liar. And then, uh, the softball game ending, which is just a really good ending.

• 55:05Speaker 01

  It's cute.

• 55:06Bill Simmons?

  I have, uh, the breakup or New Year's Eve as my most rewatchable.

• 55:10Chris Ryan?

  I have New Year's Eve. I mean, it's the same night, but I have New Year's Eve. Yeah.

• 55:13Speaker 01

  I'm torn between the opening, which I just love the rhythm of, but it feels wrong to not pick something that Debbie's in. I, I think I'm gonna go Thanksgiving and the, the bathroom fight after Thanksgiving. That's the part of the movie that I, I find myself most like genuinely gripped watching. The relationship's starting to fall apart. Shocking as a child of divorce that that's the part of the movie I like the best.

• 55:31Chris Ryan?

  Throw it in the toilet or the trash.

• 55:33Speaker 01

  Yeah. Your mascara gets in the porcelain and then it gets on my fingers. Like it's real, real relatable content.

• 55:40Bill Simmons?

  Your favorite scene, softball?

• 55:42Speaker 04

  Opening monologue just catches you immediately.

• 55:44Speaker 01

  It's great.

• 55:44Speaker 04

  Before you even see anything.

• 55:45Speaker 01

  It's great.

• 55:45Speaker 04

  While the opening credits are going.

• 55:48Bill Simmons?

  Most 1986 thing about this movie.

• 55:51Speaker 01

  I gotta come.

• 55:52Bill Simmons?

  Debbie's fucking her boss and Danny's boss is fucking somebody he works with.

• 55:57Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 55:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, I mean, Danny's boss is just grabbing ass.

• 55:59Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 56:00Speaker 01

  Out in plain view for everyone to see.

• 56:02Chris Ryan?

  Family to feed.

• 56:02Speaker 01

  Yeah. We've all got families!

• 56:05Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 56:06Bill Simmons?

  Uh, a main character named Debbie whose best friends are Joan and Pat?

• 56:10Speaker 01

  Yeah. Some of these names for sure. Yeah.

• 56:15Bill Simmons?

  Uh, the double headphones trick.

• 56:16Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 56:16Bill Simmons?

  Not sure that's working now.

• 56:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, just the stereo system that he has in general. Yeah.

• 56:21Bill Simmons?

  Smoking indoors, just great to see it.

• 56:23Chris Ryan?

  Sure.

• 56:23Bill Simmons?

  Really made me happy.

• 56:24Speaker 01

  Big for CR.

• 56:26Bill Simmons?

  The refrigerator Peyton reference is great.

• 56:28Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 56:28Chris Ryan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 56:29Bill Simmons?

  I think the answer is Danny's Air Jordans for me.

• 56:31Speaker 01

  Well, it's definitely that, but it's beyond just the fact that it's an Air Jordan.

• 56:36Bill Simmons?

  It's the Air Jordans.

• 56:37Speaker 01

  He's wearing bands, right? Like that's, that, there's nothing that reached you in that moment of time more than that specific shoe.

• 56:43Bill Simmons?

  The specific six month stretch where those shoes came out.

• 56:47Speaker 01

  Really great. Similarly, actually, on the sports, uh, time orientation front, he's wearing the no lights Wrigley Field shirt.

• 56:54Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 56:54Speaker 01

  Because they were protesting bringing lights to Wrigley.

• 56:56Bill Simmons?

  Interesting, that's a good one.

• 56:57Speaker 01

  So the yellow one with the red, he's got that on cause they brought lights in 88. So that's real like, you know, mid, mid 80s trying to fend off the inevitable.

• 57:03Chris Ryan?

  I got a couple. The number one is Deb's boss saying that after softball loss, he's gonna go home and take some lithium.

• 57:12Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah.

• 57:15Chris Ryan?

  And.

• 57:15Speaker 01

  I loved that.

• 57:16Chris Ryan?

  Alex, Danny's side piece making a replicants reference, which would have just been like, this, this chick watches Blade Runner, I guess. Uh.

• 57:23Speaker 01

  Same.

• 57:24Speaker 04

  I gotta be honest, I don't even really know what lithium is. Like, I don't even know what that really means.

• 57:28Chris Ryan?

  It's a.

• 57:28Bill Simmons?

  Is it a pill?

• 57:29Chris Ryan?

  It's like an antidepressant, like anti-anxiety medication, but I think it's the one they, it was like Wolf of Wall Street era, like.

• 57:36Speaker 04

  Okay, so like, it's like a modern Xanax or something?

• 57:39Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, but I think that they were cooking with a little bit more like industrial strength stuff back then. Yeah.

• 57:45Speaker 01

  Alex, the, the ex Alex, the fur coat also being like, I'm in the book. You know, look somebody up in the phone book if you wanna find them. That's a real, we're not saying that anymore.

• 57:53Chris Ryan?

  I'm in the book.

• 57:54Speaker 01

  I'm in the book.

• 57:55Bill Simmons?

  She was gross.

• 57:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm not a fan.

• 58:00Bill Simmons?

  The Floyd Gondoli butter on my ass, lollipops in my mouth, the word for something I just enjoy. What do you have?

• 58:05Speaker 01

  Um, themed dinner nights. A sandwich night sounds wonderful. I, I don't, come on. This is, this sounds lovely.

• 58:12Chris Ryan?

  Could you fulfill your end of the two nights I cook, two nights he cooks?

• 58:15Speaker 01

  Of course not. Our version of this is tonight is DoorDash night, tonight is postmates night, tonight is you put the order in, tonight is I put the order in. But I think this idea.

• 58:24Chris Ryan?

  Do you think you're why Mark Walter had to sell the Lakers is cause somehow?

• 58:29Speaker 01

  Entirely possible. My relationships, yeah, the, the e-delivery economy, it's entirely possible. Um, you know, I just think that Joan responding to that, you know, I bet your sex life is a real thrill when, when Debbie is describing that.

• 58:41Bill Simmons?

  So what do you do on sandwich night?

• 58:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, this is just goals to me. Like having that, that sure thing that you know you get to look forward to, a shared meal.

• 58:49Chris Ryan?

  Joan's, um.

• 58:50Speaker 01

  A theme night.

• 58:51Chris Ryan?

  Her, her stir fry that she makes that night where it's like.

• 58:55Speaker 01

  So funny.

• 58:56Chris Ryan?

  It's like a clear like, kind of like at that time Weight Watchers kind of like.

• 59:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's like a lean cuisine or something.

• 59:01Chris Ryan?

  Here's a really good like chicken breast with some veggies, just if you're watching your weight. And it's like, oh God, and she's eating her like one little fucking.

• 59:07Bill Simmons?

  This is just the greatest movie of all time.

• 59:09Speaker 01

  That scene is so funny.

• 59:11Bill Simmons?

  Months.

• 59:11Speaker 01

  He's like, we're, we have to be at this movie in 10 minutes. The performative, you know, it's like saying, do you want me to pick you up from the airport or like, can I help you move in? That's the way they ask if she wants to go to this movie.

• 59:22Bill Simmons?

  Do you wanna come?

• 59:24Speaker 01

  Says yes, and then one.

• 59:26Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, just let me get ready. Just to fuck their night.

• 59:28Speaker 01

  So good. She's the best.

• 59:30Bill Simmons?

  What do you have?

• 59:30Chris Ryan?

  80s Chicago movies. Just a movie in the 80s set in Chicago. I'm like.

• 59:36Bill Simmons?

  That was my backup choice. My choices, softball scenes in movies or TV shows.

• 59:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, good one.

• 59:42Bill Simmons?

  Few Good Men. I could watch Cruise and Grounders for an hour.

• 59:45Chris Ryan?

  I'm gonna hang your boy from a fucking yardarm. Yeah.

• 59:48Bill Simmons?

  Curb Your Enthusiasm, very important softball scene with, uh, Rosie O'Donnell, that whole episode about last night. Cheers had a big softball.

• 59:57Chris Ryan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 59:58Bill Simmons?

  The battle against the other bar. And then, uh, WKRP, which nobody listening to this watched, they had a radio station softball game, I remember. But in general, I'm always gonna watch.

• 1:00:08Speaker 01

  It's great.

• 1:00:08Bill Simmons?

  It's like, oh, people are playing softball? I like to see how the actors throw.

• 1:00:12Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 1:00:12Bill Simmons?

  Like you can't really fake softball hitting.

• 1:00:15Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:15Bill Simmons?

  Um, the pitcher, where they put the actors in the game is always interesting. Like Danny being at second, I really like, why is he not shortstop? I don't, did they have somebody better?

• 1:00:26Chris Ryan?

  I got the impression that Danny was an emerging talent. Cause they're like, the second baseman has a great ass, you know, like it's like a lot of like, maybe he's, he's new on the scene. This is a rookie season for him.

• 1:00:38Speaker 01

  I wonder if there's something about that heavier ball, fewer people are pull hitters.

• 1:00:42Chris Ryan?

  Oh.

• 1:00:43Speaker 01

  More.

• 1:00:43Chris Ryan?

  Opposite field stuff.

• 1:00:44Speaker 01

  More infield dribblers going to second.

• 1:00:46Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:48Speaker 01

  Throwing that out there.

• 1:00:48Chris Ryan?

  Do you think that, um, Chicago style?

• 1:00:50Bill Simmons?

  Fan graphs.

• 1:00:51Chris Ryan?

  Has Chicago style softball been ruined by advanced analytics?

• 1:00:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:00:55Bill Simmons?

  And hedge funds.

• 1:00:56Chris Ryan?

  Are they doing shifts?

• 1:00:57Speaker 01

  What was that guys?

• 1:00:58Bill Simmons?

  Hedge funds, PCs, private equities for 16 inch softball.

• 1:01:02Speaker 01

  Exit Velo on, on that ball.

• 1:01:05Bill Simmons?

  What's age the best? They say the title multiple times.

• 1:01:07Speaker 01

  It's, and guess what? Every single time it's great.

• 1:01:10Bill Simmons?

  It totally works.

• 1:01:11Speaker 01

  Every single time it's great.

• 1:01:13Bill Simmons?

  Mentioned the rom-com structure, CR mentioned Chicago. We mentioned really great best friend relationships with loyalty, comedy and sabotage and ball busting.

• 1:01:21Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 1:01:22Bill Simmons?

  Her saying her boss, nah, it was kinda sleazy and now it's over. Now it's kinda over.

• 1:01:27Speaker 01

  And now it's kind of over is a great breakup line.

• 1:01:29Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. I wrote down slutty hot Megan Mullally.

• 1:01:34Speaker 01

  No notes.

• 1:01:34Bill Simmons?

  In this category.

• 1:01:35Speaker 01

  No notes. Yep.

• 1:01:36Bill Simmons?

  Just keep her away. Keep, keep your man away from her.

• 1:01:43Bill Simmons?

  I'm gonna go home. Will you make sure Danny's all right at the bar? Yeah, I'll make sure.

• 1:01:46Chris Ryan?

  Someone put Mullally on a pitch count.

• 1:01:51Bill Simmons?

  I just can't believe, I'd love, I looked all over the place for her talking about this. And the only thing I could find was her husband saying they'd both kissed Rob Lowe. Yeah. Cause he kissed him in a show.

• 1:02:04Speaker 01

  Great stuff.

• 1:02:07Bill Simmons?

  It's a subtle one, but Bernie, when, when Danny's really unraveling, he goes to the bar and she's, and she ends up leaving, but they cut to Bernie and Bernie's just like,

• 1:02:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:02:18Bill Simmons?

  Like, I can't believe my friends unraveling like this. Like just, it's like the perfect expression. I have a couple more, but what do you have?

• 1:02:24Chris Ryan?

  The disastrous first Thanksgiving that you cook on your own.

• 1:02:27Speaker 01

  Man.

• 1:02:28Chris Ryan?

  Uh, and I gotta say, like,

• 1:02:32Chris Ryan?

  on re-watch, it's the re-watchability of the montages. Because like, you wouldn't really wanna watch all those scenes, but you're just like, you know what? I know exactly where I am in this relationship now.

• 1:02:41Speaker 01

  This is an all-time montage movie. It's wonderful. Uh, I'm just gonna throw out a kind of obvious one, but meeting people in real life? I think that's aged the best. This really ports you back to a moment in time, like pre-dating app era, you know? You go to the park, you go to the bar, you meet people.

• 1:02:57Bill Simmons?

  Second baseman has a cute ass.

• 1:02:59Chris Ryan?

  I wonder whether people get to weed out getting Bernie'd.

• 1:03:02Speaker 01

  It's certainly, you are more informed in your choices now, and that's better. But there was something nostalgic about this. Like, oh, people just don't, people don't meet this way anymore. Where are you supposed to meet someone?

• 1:03:13Speaker 04

  There's also like, a weird comfortability that in the eighties, like the scene-

• 1:03:17Chris Ryan?

  Craig's got fucking tears in his eyes. Like, he's like watching the natural.

• 1:03:23Speaker 01

  This is your Citizen Kane.

• 1:03:24Speaker 04

  No, I was, I was gonna say like, in the beginning of the movie, when Joan and Debbie are hanging out in their apartment, and Debbie's got like the hairy guy in the bedroom. Just like, being comfortable with that environment feels very old school to me. Like, that is not something now that, in my opinion, you would see like, two girls being like, oh yeah, some ugly dudes in the room, like I slept with him, he won't get up, he's pissed drunk. And they're just like laughing about it, joking around, checking on him in there. It just feels very intimate, and nowadays, nobody would do stuff like that.

• 1:03:53Speaker 01

  Definitely. Yeah. I think there's also just the kind of like, attention to detail. For example, it's been 30 seconds since we talked about Bernie. Let's talk about him again. On the roof scene that you mentioned, you know, when he like turns away from Danny, and you can see so clearly the outline of his wallet and his jeans. You're like, oh, this guy wears this pair of jeans every day. Like, just little things like that make it feel really lived in and like authentically that like-

• 1:04:18Chris Ryan?

  When he helps them move and he's got the leather jacket with the Blackhawks jersey underneath, I'm like, this guy.

• 1:04:23Speaker 01

  This guy wears this. Yeah.

• 1:04:26Bill Simmons?

  He's great. Uh, sandwich night I had.

• 1:04:29Speaker 01

  I mean, no notes.

• 1:04:30Bill Simmons?

  Big Chicago, big softball Chicago. And then just some burning lines. The thing about Redhead's lack of pigmentation.

• 1:04:39Speaker 01

  An insane exchange.

• 1:04:41Bill Simmons?

  I once nailed two stewardesses at 4,700 feet. You know what? It was fun.

• 1:04:48Speaker 01

  It was fun.

• 1:04:49Bill Simmons?

  Pull this leg and it plays Jingle Bells, I've taken. Never call abroad more than once a week, ever, ever, ever. You're as much fun as a stick.

• 1:04:59Bill Simmons?

  I'm surprised the guy didn't leave skid marks.

• 1:05:03Bill Simmons?

  And then, this is crass, but if she didn't have a pussy, there would be a bounty on her head.

• 1:05:06Chris Ryan?

  That was my flex.

• 1:05:07Speaker 01

  Directly to Joan, incredible.

• 1:05:08Chris Ryan?

  That was my book about medals.

• 1:05:11Chris Ryan?

  That is, that is like crazy line. And that's not Mamet, that's them. I was impressed.

• 1:05:15Speaker 01

  I also quite like when he says, she looks very intellectual. I mean, that's not always a bad thing. It's incredible. The static electricity that's being caused is sending these little sparks right to my nuts. It's the best. Incredible stuff.

• 1:05:29Bill Simmons?

  The only thing, I don't, not positive this is true, but it was in the research where Lowe said he improvised some of the fight scene stuff. And I Don't Love You Anymore wasn't in the script, and her reaction was genuine, cause she wasn't expecting him to say that.

• 1:05:44Speaker 01

  Interesting.

• 1:05:44Bill Simmons?

  And then it's like, did they have a little history?

• 1:05:46Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:46Bill Simmons?

  Did that one hit a little closer to home?

• 1:05:48Chris Ryan?

  Not to Demi Moore's recollection. So.

• 1:05:51Speaker 01

  She's like, Don Draper, I don't think about you at all. And he's like, this was the most-

• 1:05:55Bill Simmons?

  It is the difference in, it's men and women. Women have a tendency to, yeah, I don't remember, it might've been once. Whereas, I think we would be like, it was seven times.

• 1:06:04Chris Ryan?

  If it was Demi Moore, I think I'd be-

• 1:06:06Speaker 01

  Exactly. I think it's more that. I think if you fucked Demi Moore, you'd remember it.

• 1:06:10Chris Ryan?

  I'd write Lord of the Rings about it. I would just be like, here's the prequel.

• 1:06:16Speaker 01

  Man, can't wait for Landman to come back, by the way.

• 1:06:20Bill Simmons?

  Do you feel like Demi Moore is a different human being in this movie than Landman Demi Moore? Or you feel like it's the same person?

• 1:06:25Speaker 01

  Oh, I could definitely, spoilers for Landman in season two, definitely see Debbie

• 1:06:32Speaker 01

  sprawled out on the like, concrete in her backyard, wailing, sobbing, and the subtitles just say coyotes howling. For sure. So, are Cammy and Debbie that different? Probably not.

• 1:06:45Bill Simmons?

  Take one more break and we'll finish.

• 1:06:47Speaker 05

  I'm pro football Hall of Famer Brian Dawkins, and I lived for a long time with something I did not know the name of. Major depressive disorder. I carry sadness and anger because I thought I could handle it alone, but I couldn't. Now I wanna make sure others know that that support is out there. If you're experiencing similar symptoms, talk to a healthcare professional. Visit mddallies.com to watch my story.

• 1:07:13Speaker 06

  Paid partnership with Johnson & Johnson. Brian Dawkins has not prescribed Caplyta lumateperone.

• 1:07:24Speaker 03

  I needed more from my antidepressant, so my doctor added Caplyta lumateperone. Proven to provide greater relief from depression symptoms than an antidepressant alone. Building on my progress without starting over. Caplyta is for adults with major depressive disorder when used with an antidepressant and is available by prescription only. Individual results may vary. In clinical trials, weight gain was not common.

• 1:07:45Speaker 06

  Elderly dementia patients have increased risk of death or stroke. Caplyta is not approved for dementia-related psychosis. Call your doctor about new or sudden mood changes, behaviors, or suicidal thoughts right away. Antidepressants may increase these risks. Report fever, confusion, stiff muscles, which may be life-threatening, or uncontrolled muscle movements, which may be permanent. High cholesterol and weight gain may occur, as can high blood sugar, which may be fatal. Monitoring is recommended. Common side effects are sleepiness, dizziness, nausea, dry mouth, feeling tired, and diarrhea. These aren't all the side effects.

• 1:08:11Speaker 03

  Ask your doctor about Caplyta. Learn more at caplyta.com or call 888-252-4824.

• 1:08:17Bill Simmons?

  This episode is brought to by Viori. When it comes to clothes that score high in both comfort and style, Viori is my MVP. Sunday performance joggers, oh yeah. They have the perfect, I could watch a game and then go out to dinner vibe. And the meta pant, that's my number one, I need to look like I tried option. Get 20% off your first purchase at viori.com/simmons and discover the versatility of Viori clothing. Exclusions apply. Visit the website for full terms and conditions.

• 1:08:45Bill Simmons?

  All right, some quickies. Great Jack Gordo, you didn't have the snowy subway shot?

• 1:08:48Chris Ryan?

  I had the rooftop pan to Wrigley.

• 1:08:51Speaker 01

  Oh, that's a good one.

• 1:08:52Chris Ryan?

  Good one.

• 1:08:53Speaker 01

  I have when they're fucking in the shower. They're, they're in the bathtub, the shower's on, but here's the great Jack Gordo. Here's the great Jack Gordo part. The camera is focused on the rubber duck in the corner of the tub. It's just an incredible little detail. And it really pops. It's a black tub.

• 1:09:12Bill Simmons?

  Thumbs up.

• 1:09:13Speaker 01

  So you see the yellow really shine there? It's great.

• 1:09:16Bill Simmons?

  Big Huna Burger Award, best use of food or drink. It's gotta be the double shots.

• 1:09:20Speaker 01

  Oh, man. I don't know.

• 1:09:21Chris Ryan?

  Boiler makers that they have on NY, New Year's Eve.

• 1:09:24Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 1:09:25Chris Ryan?

  That Belushi and Joan's boyfriend-

• 1:09:27Speaker 01

  That's a good one. Yeah, Gary, good old Gary. I think it's either the Joan leisurely eating the dinner that we already talked about, or watching, there's obviously the Thanksgiving fight, but before that, when Danny's out and Debbie is like, basically just definitely giving them all salmonella, the way that she prepares this turkey, like, giant turkey that she's tapping with her bare hands in the sink and like her bathrobe sleeves are just all over it.

• 1:09:53Chris Ryan?

  That's like more like the Julia Child style, like, we don't have to worry.

• 1:09:56Bill Simmons?

  Everyone had diarrhea the next day. There's no question.

• 1:09:59Speaker 01

  It's the parasitic diarrhea era now, so they were just early, you know? They were early.

• 1:10:04Bill Simmons?

  Chess Rockwell Brocklander's best character name, it's gotta be Bernie.

• 1:10:06Chris Ryan?

  Bernie Lico.

• 1:10:07Speaker 01

  Oh, I think it's-

• 1:10:09Bill Simmons?

  Yo, Lico!

• 1:10:10Speaker 01

  Like, I think it's swallow if establishments are eligible instead of people, because in addition to it being, it's the source of a lot of tension between Danny and his boss as they talk about the diner. Just doubles as a suck and swallow joke, and does she give head is a big part of the plot of this movie, so throwing that out there.

• 1:10:28Chris Ryan?

  It crossed my mind as well.

• 1:10:31Speaker 01

  How can it not?

• 1:10:32Bill Simmons?

  Dennis Thieves' Benihana scene stealing location, it's gotta be mothers.

• 1:10:35Speaker 01

  There's no question. This was one of the easiest picks for a category ever.

• 1:10:38Chris Ryan?

  But probably mothers.

• 1:10:39Speaker 01

  Oh, the steam baths are good. Yeah. A lot of wrinkly tush in that.

• 1:10:41Bill Simmons?

  What do you got for a flex, CR?

• 1:10:42Chris Ryan?

  I had, it's a book about medals award for the belatedly best quarter exchange for you know what? Joan, if you didn't have a pussy, there'd be a bounty on your head. It's just fucking crazy.

• 1:10:53Bill Simmons?

  Kid Cudi Pursuit of Happiness Award, best needle drop.

• 1:10:56Chris Ryan?

  Contentious.

• 1:10:57Bill Simmons?

  I can offer you five montage songs. Two by Sheena Easton.

• 1:11:03Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:11:03Bill Simmons?

  So Far So Good and We Got a Natural Love.

• 1:11:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:11:06Bill Simmons?

  Living Inside My Heart by Bob Seger. Till You Love Somebody by newcomer Michael Henderson.

• 1:11:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's good.

• 1:11:14Bill Simmons?

  Or If Anybody Had A Heart by John Waite, which is a remake of a Crosby, Stills & Nash song. Five montages. What do you got, CR?

• 1:11:22Chris Ryan?

  Living Inside My Heart. Okay.

• 1:11:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think probably. I think so.

• 1:11:27Chris Ryan?

  A little bit of Bruce Hornsby vibes to that one. I like that. What was your favorite?

• 1:11:32Speaker 04

  I think, is that the first big montage song?

• 1:11:35Chris Ryan?

  It's the montage where she's doing the fitted sheet.

• 1:11:37Bill Simmons?

  That's So Far So Good.

• 1:11:37Speaker 01

  And he's making the pasta sauce and it's great.

• 1:11:40Bill Simmons?

  I think what's key about the montage choices is they each describe the part of the movie we're in.

• 1:11:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:11:47Bill Simmons?

  So Far So Good.

• 1:11:48Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:11:50Bill Simmons?

  We Got a Natural Love.

• 1:11:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:11:52Bill Simmons?

  Living Inside My Heart now. You don't know what it's like till you love somebody.

• 1:11:57Speaker 01

  It's all right there. It's all right there for us.

• 1:11:58Bill Simmons?

  If anybody had a heart.

• 1:11:59Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:12:00Bill Simmons?

  We're just there all the way through. Uh, the Sean Penn, I brought my unpack award for excellence in on-screen smoking. Lot of candidates here. It's down to Belushi and Rob Lowe. Who do you have?

• 1:12:08Chris Ryan?

  I got Rob Lowe in the breakup scene. Just the cigarette like dangling there.

• 1:12:13Bill Simmons?

  Feels like he's gonna set the apartment on fire. He's just, he's just callous disregard.

• 1:12:17Chris Ryan?

  He's a pro. Let him work.

• 1:12:19Speaker 01

  Would've been payoff if he had for the, the Chekhov's fire setup from the prior story that Bernie told, you know?

• 1:12:26Bill Simmons?

  Butch's Girlfriend Award for a weak link of the film.

• 1:12:31Bill Simmons?

  Joan with the married guy.

• 1:12:33Speaker 01

  Gary, yeah.

• 1:12:34Bill Simmons?

  He's married, but he's with her on New Year's Eve, but then he tells her on New Year's Eve, I'm married.

• 1:12:39Speaker 01

  I had the.

• 1:12:39Bill Simmons?

  It's a little iffy.

• 1:12:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, I had the New Year's Eve part as a picking nick, because if you're specifically trying to get back your marriage back together, you're not with your mistress on New Year's Eve, I don't think.

• 1:12:49Bill Simmons?

  And she's not gonna know it's she's the mistress. Like Joan's pretty smart.

• 1:12:53Speaker 01

  She is.

• 1:12:54Bill Simmons?

  I don't know.

• 1:12:54Chris Ryan?

  I had the swallow city diner plotline. Which I think is largely there to give Danny some kind of redemption slash like future outside of his relationship with Deb.

• 1:13:07Bill Simmons?

  He just wants his own joint.

• 1:13:08Speaker 01

  Just a touch of substance.

• 1:13:09Chris Ryan?

  Bullshit that like Flavio would let him, or whatever that guy's name is, Flavio would let him go ahead and not close that place down like the three times he ignores him.

• 1:13:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:13:17Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:13:17Chris Ryan?

  And then, did Danny get a loan? Like, how did that go?

• 1:13:21Bill Simmons?

  I had all this in nitpicks.

• 1:13:23Speaker 04

  It's easy. You just get a loan from the bank.

• 1:13:25Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:13:25Bill Simmons?

  And then he immediately goes in. It's 1986.

• 1:13:27Chris Ryan?

  And he's charging $5 for a burger when you can get a burger for a buck 90 down the street.

• 1:13:31Speaker 01

  Down the street, yeah.

• 1:13:32Bill Simmons?

  I thought the burger price was alarmingly high.

• 1:13:35Chris Ryan?

  Adjusted for inflation, that's a $15 burger.

• 1:13:37Bill Simmons?

  $4.95 was no burger in 1986.

• 1:13:39Speaker 01

  That's a lot.

• 1:13:40Speaker 04

  In and out right now is like a $5 burger.

• 1:13:42Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:13:42Speaker 01

  And it's like, it's not fine dining, right? He's doing like a, he's doing the diner.

• 1:13:45Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, but he's doing that thing where it's like, it's a diner, but like I have to charge a lot because I've put so much money in that place.

• 1:13:51Speaker 01

  Interesting. I do like the one, the redeeming quality inside of the swallow city diner plot is just the detail of the menus being the same colors, the signs she made him, the pink and green.

• 1:14:00Chris Ryan?

  That's right.

• 1:14:00Speaker 01

  Delightful. Little touch there. Lovely.

• 1:14:03Bill Simmons?

  What's age the worst? Did you have a week of slink or?

• 1:14:05Speaker 01

  No, nothing we haven't already talked about. Nothing we haven't already talked about.

• 1:14:08Bill Simmons?

  What's age the worst? Danny's weird stalking phase. He's also too handsome. I just think he gets another girlfriend. It's a guy that didn't work out.

• 1:14:15Chris Ryan?

  They just don't move.

• 1:14:17Speaker 01

  He has no problem finding people to fuck. That's, yeah, not an issue for him.

• 1:14:22Bill Simmons?

  Debbie's clothes are just a atrocity, but it's very 80s. But man, there's one scene when you see her whole closet and my wife, oh, every time my wife's like, oh, oofta.

• 1:14:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:14:34Bill Simmons?

  Just some of the worst blouses.

• 1:14:36Chris Ryan?

  I do have a note about a particular outfit coming up, though. Okay.

• 1:14:39Speaker 01

  I think the, I think the men's fashion is particularly bad in the movie. There's the, when all of the, the female friends are on their like lawn blanket, watching the initial softball game. For a second, you think that the fashion's gonna be iconic. Like the sweater.

• 1:14:54Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:55Speaker 01

  Joan is basically dressed like CR in that scene, and that's a compliment, right? She's pulling off like a rugby shirt sweater. It looks great. And then it's, it's kind of all downhill from there on the fashion front.

• 1:15:05Bill Simmons?

  My mom, who really loves this movie, it's one of her all time favorites. And she thinks Debbie's overalls in the last scene.

• 1:15:13Speaker 01

  Oh, I love the overalls.

• 1:15:14Bill Simmons?

  She thinks Demi Moore would have all copies of this movie destroyed for the last scene.

• 1:15:18Speaker 01

  No, overalls are timeless. I don't agree.

• 1:15:20Bill Simmons?

  She hates it. There's no way. Plus the outfit, like she's wearing stuff under the overalls. It seems heavy, but it's like June.

• 1:15:29Chris Ryan?

  Well, I think we get into some weird like timeline stuff here.

• 1:15:32Bill Simmons?

  And the leaves are on the ground for some reason.

• 1:15:33Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 1:15:35Bill Simmons?

  Ruffalo Hannah Rubin at Partridge overacting where Danny's boss, it's a bird. It's a loser bird.

• 1:15:41Speaker 01

  I had him for Dion Waiters, but obviously he's definitely overacting. What about Gus from, from the diner? You're cutting my throat.

• 1:15:49Bill Simmons?

  Can you give me a break, Danny? All right, it's time.

• 1:15:52Speaker 01

  Talk to this to me.

• 1:15:53Bill Simmons?

  Put your seatbelts on. I'll even put my seatbelt on, CR.

• 1:15:56Chris Ryan?

  I can push the microphone away.

• 1:15:57Bill Simmons?

  We have a special sex section for Mallory Rubin. She doesn't get a flex.

• 1:16:01Speaker 01

  Oh, man.

• 1:16:02Bill Simmons?

  First one is the Mallory Rubin award. Did this movie need a better sex scene?

• 1:16:06Speaker 01

  Okay, since we have multiple sex specific categories in a row, I'll try to keep it quick, you know? As Joan says, you just need like 10 minutes.

• 1:16:15Bill Simmons?

  Okay.

• 1:16:16Speaker 01

  I think there are three candidates for this category. One specifically is oral sex because does she give head again is like a crucial question in the movie.

• 1:16:27Bill Simmons?

  Never answered.

• 1:16:28Speaker 01

  No, we have a little bit in, in the Seeger montage, there's one of the glimpses of them passionately making love to each other. Debbie is on her stomach. And there's that little moment where Danny is like kissing and rubbing her back and moving down toward her ass, but then we cut away. And then, of course, crucially in the breakup scene.

• 1:16:51Speaker 01

  This is canon. This is in the movie. Fine, I'm gone. It's done. You can go back to doing whatever you want to do with whoever you want to do it with. In whatever orifice you want to do it in.

• 1:17:03Chris Ryan?

  Interesting.

• 1:17:03Speaker 01

  So is Danny saying to Debbie like, why aren't you sucking my dick more? Or is he like, can I put it in your ass? One of those things has happened.

• 1:17:11Bill Simmons?

  So I never caught that until I had the subtitles on for this. I always thought she said whatever office you want to do it in.

• 1:17:17Speaker 01

  Right. Orifice.

• 1:17:18Bill Simmons?

  It's orifice.

• 1:17:19Speaker 01

  It sure is, folks. It sure is. Next, masturbation.

• 1:17:25Chris Ryan?

  Wait, what, what category is this?

• 1:17:28Bill Simmons?

  Did this movie need a better sex scene?

• 1:17:30Speaker 01

  This movie needed better sex. So we needed some oral sex.

• 1:17:32Chris Ryan?

  So you're having subcategories of this question.

• 1:17:34Speaker 01

  There's, there's some contenders.

• 1:17:36Bill Simmons?

  Let me try to interpret this. You're saying the movie needed more sex.

• 1:17:39Speaker 01

  Well, I think it's a great sex scene movie, but there was opportunity for even more. And one of them was with orifice.

• 1:17:45Bill Simmons?

  Okay.

• 1:17:45Speaker 01

  Next, masturbation. Exactly. And I think this is a real opportunity here to get Bernie involved because when, on the move in day.

• 1:17:54Bill Simmons?

  Is there?

• 1:17:54Speaker 01

  Yes, on the move in day. So Debbie finds a stack. I, I freeze framed. It's not like the 4K era of Playboys. You count at least a dozen there.

• 1:18:04Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:04Speaker 01

  So Bernie takes one. He swipes one. We know that Bernie is going in and out of the U-Haul. Just a little quick, a little quick crank from Bernie. I think would have been very much at home in this movie.

• 1:18:15Bill Simmons?

  Okay. Crank daddy.

• 1:18:17Speaker 01

  But that brings us to the real, oh, and also I think we could have gotten a Debbie masturbation scene, and I think we nearly did in the Seeger montage that we all love so much. Couple of things, the fitting sheet, the spreading out the sheets. She's like basically masturbating when she's doing that. And then she's got the, like putting the perfume on.

• 1:18:32Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:32Speaker 01

  She just wants to rub one out. Why didn't she? Next, Bernie and Joan. Okay. They have incredible chemistry together. It's undeniable.

• 1:18:40Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:40Speaker 01

  It's a fact. When they're finally alone together, and it is about just them, even though of course Danny and Debbie are present in, in absentia because they're talking about them. This is the, the pussy bounty hunter scene. You want to leave my bone out of this? You're a filthy scumbag. The flirtation. And then he says, so you want to dance or what? And she very like, like real sexy, putting the piece of popcorn into her mouth and kind of raising her eyes up at him. I think definitely they fuck here. For sure they fuck.

• 1:19:09Bill Simmons?

  I don't even think it's a question.

• 1:19:11Speaker 01

  My question is, because then we see them later at the park at the hot dog cart. And he's like, oh, give me more, give me more. I want another taste. And she's like, fuck off. Why didn't we see the sex scene? They're at mothers where we know canonically, the bathroom door locks. Because when Joan is having her meltdown at New Year's and Debbie goes into the bathroom to comfort her, they lock the door and someone else is like, I'm gonna piss my pants. It's New Year's Eve. Let me in. We, we as moviegoers did not deserve the quick cut to Joan and Bernie fucking on that broken toilet seat in the mother's bathroom? Come on.

• 1:19:45Bill Simmons?

  It definitely like something breaks in the bathroom.

• 1:19:47Chris Ryan?

  I, for a long time, I had thought that Bernie was the person in Joan's bedroom.

• 1:19:52Bill Simmons?

  Me too.

• 1:19:52Speaker 01

  At the beginning, when she, yeah. I think they set you up to think that.

• 1:19:55Speaker 04

  They're like quietly hooking up the whole time, off and on.

• 1:19:58Speaker 01

  Yeah. That would have been great.

• 1:20:01Bill Simmons?

  The Steven Seagal hard to kill award for did this movie need a better intimacy coordinator?

• 1:20:06Speaker 01

  I mean, it's possible this podcast needs a better intimacy coordinator.

• 1:20:09Chris Ryan?

  I think you're behaving yourself quite well, even though you just speculated about anal sex in, in this movie.

• 1:20:14Speaker 01

  Hang with me for this next one. When there, there's some visible ball, some visible bouncing ball.

• 1:20:21Bill Simmons?

  I was gonna say, now that the TVs and the HD has gotten better, like.

• 1:20:24Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:20:25Bill Simmons?

  He's definitely Billy Bob monster balling. He's monster balling it.

• 1:20:29Speaker 01

  One of the montages when they're in bed a lot and she.

• 1:20:32Speaker 04

  I didn't see any ball.

• 1:20:32Speaker 01

  Oh, okay. Oh.

• 1:20:34Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:20:35Speaker 01

  Do you want, do you want to see now?

• 1:20:36Bill Simmons?

  I actually think, it made me wonder if they were actually.

• 1:20:39Speaker 01

  This is, this is why I think it's eligible for the intimacy coordinator question.

• 1:20:42Chris Ryan?

  Because they were really, when she gets on top of him.

• 1:20:44Speaker 01

  Yes, exactly. She, they roll over, she's on top. And as she is moving up and down, you can see a little, a little ball kind of poppin'.

• 1:20:50Bill Simmons?

  I think Estevez, they do the screening for the movie and Estevez is engaged with her. I think he's out of the theater.

• 1:20:57Chris Ryan?

  Well, he cheated on her, but yeah.

• 1:20:58Bill Simmons?

  I think he sees that scene. He's like, I'll, I'll see you in the car.

• 1:21:01Speaker 01

  Now you're wearing a cock sock or something, but he was, he was not in that scene clearly.

• 1:21:05Speaker 04

  I see Chris defending Demi Moore in 1980.

• 1:21:09Chris Ryan?

  I read a whole article today where she was like, we sent out invitations. And then my friend was like, I saw Emilio with a, with a gal in LA.

• 1:21:16Speaker 01

  Incredible stuff.

• 1:21:17Bill Simmons?

  I just think all bets were off in the 80s.

• 1:21:19Chris Ryan?

  Of course.

• 1:21:20Bill Simmons?

  Just.

• 1:21:20Speaker 01

  What a decade.

• 1:21:21Chris Ryan?

  How could you have sex with Rob Lowe and be like, I think I did that? You know, like, yeah.

• 1:21:26Bill Simmons?

  I think I met it on it once.

• 1:21:29Bill Simmons?

  All right. So we say yes on intimacy coordinator. He got game hooker scene award for most awkward if someone walks in the room.

• 1:21:35Speaker 01

  I thought this was really easy. To me, this is the, the montage we've talked about so much. This is the Seeger montage stretch because it is a tonally confusing mashup. So somebody walks in and they see, oh, we're making a bed or we're making pasta. And they think they've walked into a Hallmark movie. And then Demi Moore is curving her spine at an impossible angle, nipples front and center as they're fucking for the next five minutes. So the fact that you're cutting back and forth and someone would actually feel invited into the room. Oh, what an interesting little domestic story about how to prepare a meal together. Keep it home. No, no.

• 1:22:15Bill Simmons?

  Definitely on the airplane. If Craig had watched this on an airplane, he'd be like, oh, I should be all right with about less.

• 1:22:21Speaker 01

  And then it's Cinemax before you know it.

• 1:22:22Speaker 04

  I watch poor things on an airplane, you know, it's tough.

• 1:22:25Speaker 01

  Yeah. There's some great oral sex scenes in that movie. I remember them well. Yeah.

• 1:22:29Bill Simmons?

  The Phoebe Cates award for excellence in putting teens through their puberty. I think same scene.

• 1:22:33Speaker 01

  Well, there's so much nipple in the movie. The beanbag ass play, ass crack into the fucking in the bathtub shower nipple glimpse is great. The, the Seeger montage stretch, you get the visible nipple during the floor sex. You get tits on full display in the back arch. Nipples in the kitchen. You look so great in that light. But we're not here to just objectify women. You can see Rob Lowe's dick in that scene. When they walk into the kitchen and he opens the refrigerator.

• 1:23:04Chris Ryan?

  This is like what it must be like to podcast with Jim Garrison.

• 1:23:07Bill Simmons?

  I saw.

• 1:23:08Chris Ryan?

  She's just like back to the left.

• 1:23:10Speaker 01

  His dick in the glow of the fridge.

• 1:23:12Bill Simmons?

  I saw Chase Daniel on NFL Live yesterday, and this is exactly the same.

• 1:23:16Chris Ryan?

  She's seeing too high. She's gonna go into like.

• 1:23:19Bill Simmons?

  And when they go 12.

• 1:23:23Bill Simmons?

  So was it side dick or dick dick?

• 1:23:25Speaker 01

  It's side dick. It's side dick and the glow of the fridge. It's wonderful.

• 1:23:29Chris Ryan?

  Where do you think they they got more careful about that in movies? The 90s?

• 1:23:34Bill Simmons?

  I don't think they knew the pictures were gonna be this good. I think everything was super blurry back then.

• 1:23:38Speaker 01

  Well, you boot that up now on your streamer on your 75 inch TV and you're richly rewarded.

• 1:23:42Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:23:43Bill Simmons?

  I think by the time we got to Wild Things, when Kevin Bacon

• 1:23:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:23:46Bill Simmons?

  half fluffed himself to get ready for coming out of the shower.

• 1:23:49Chris Ryan?

  Is that apocryphal or is that real?

• 1:23:50Speaker 01

  Bill is convinced.

• 1:23:51Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:23:52Speaker 01

  Bill is convinced.

• 1:23:53Bill Simmons?

  I think there was some fluffing.

• 1:23:56Bill Simmons?

  Well, good news. We have another award for the Mallory category, the special subsection. The Steven Seagal shitting on himself award for most unbelievable anecdote from the actual film shoot.

• 1:24:05Speaker 01

  Let's hear it.

• 1:24:06Bill Simmons?

  This comes from Ed Zwick's book, which I bought on Apple Books yesterday.

• 1:24:09Speaker 01

  Excited. Okay.

• 1:24:11Bill Simmons?

  He was talking about how they filmed the sex scenes and he said they'd do it for eight hours and it's like way technical and

• 1:24:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:24:18Bill Simmons?

  everybody agrees that the least erotic experience you can have. You got creepy crew guys staring at you. Zwick said, "It all went well until an especially passionate and athletic moment, "when Rob began to groan quite loudly as they pretended to make love."

• 1:24:34Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 1:24:34Bill Simmons?

  Everyone looked away embarrassed, trying to act like it wasn't happening, "until we realized that Rob had torn his ACL."

• 1:24:43Bill Simmons?

  Pro that he is, Rob kept acting until I said, "Cut." The show, as they say, had to go on.

• 1:24:48Speaker 01

  Okay. That's not where I thought that was going.

• 1:24:51Bill Simmons?

  Rob never mentioned this again. It was not in his book. "I tore my ACL during an about last night sex scene."

• 1:24:56Chris Ryan?

  Holy shit. How do you tear your ACL? Was he on top?

• 1:25:00Speaker 04

  Getting into the tub?

• 1:25:01Speaker 01

  We see him at the shower scene. Yeah, cuz that's a that's a tricky position.

• 1:25:04Speaker 04

  Angle there. He's really bent.

• 1:25:05Chris Ryan?

  I wonder if he really did it.

• 1:25:07Bill Simmons?

  I'd like it might have been a sprained ACL.

• 1:25:10Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:25:10Chris Ryan?

  And then blew it out.

• 1:25:11Speaker 01

  Aggravated the injury.

• 1:25:12Chris Ryan?

  Getting into the tub.

• 1:25:13Speaker 01

  That's blew. Speaking of blew it out, I thought that's where that anecdote was going. I thought you were gonna say, "And then he came."

• 1:25:18Bill Simmons?

  So as I was reading it, I thought that's where it was going. Like, oh, my God, he fucking shot one? No, he hurt his ACL.

• 1:25:26Speaker 01

  Incredible.

• 1:25:28Bill Simmons?

  So who thinks that's true?

• 1:25:29Chris Ryan?

  That's like, you know.

• 1:25:30Bill Simmons?

  But that is the most Seagal, who knows?

• 1:25:32Speaker 01

  Holy shit.

• 1:25:33Bill Simmons?

  anecdote in a while.

• 1:25:34Speaker 01

  Oh, God.

• 1:25:35Bill Simmons?

  Okay. The CR thinks Luke Wilson could have been Harrison Ford's hottest take award.

• 1:25:39Chris Ryan?

  I alluded to this earlier, but this is everything that we have lost in romantic comedies where like now it's like The Purge, but a romantic comedy or like two people who hate each other on a travel influencer wedding trip, but you know, it's like, just give me a story of a relationship. That's really all I want.

• 1:25:57Chris Ryan?

  Not even that hot of a take.

• 1:25:59Speaker 01

  It's a good take. It's a strong take.

• 1:26:00Chris Ryan?

  But like, I think I think it really starts to change around like Wedding Crashers, for instance, where it's like, ooh, like, like, what if these guys crashed weddings? And it's like, everything has to have a what if instead of just, no, they're

• 1:26:10Speaker 01

  These people wanna fuck. And then they don't for a little while, and then they do again. Yeah.

• 1:26:15Bill Simmons?

  Mine was, uh, I think she should have been more of an inspiration for other actresses, really going for it in this movie all over the place. Right? People don't have sex scenes in rom coms really ever. They're usually these PG or PG 13 vehicles to centrate some. Demi Moore is like, I'm just going for it this whole movie. Jennifer Lawrence did that in the movie that came out two years ago, where she got naked for one of the scenes, but just in general.

• 1:26:42Chris Ryan?

  Is that the one where she's with the kid?

• 1:26:43Speaker 04

  No hard feelings.

• 1:26:44Bill Simmons?

  No hard feelings. In general, though, everybody's so careful when they do these rom coms now. I appreciated that. Somebody was like, fuck it. Yeah, I'll do that. Yeah, I'll do this. I don't care. Rob Lowe's like, I'll show some side dick.

• 1:26:55Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah.

• 1:26:57Bill Simmons?

  Sure. Let's bring those days back. What do you got?

• 1:26:59Speaker 01

  I don't know if this is a hot take, but um, I'm not rooting for Danny and Debbie.

• 1:27:05Chris Ryan?

  Very interesting.

• 1:27:06Speaker 01

  I'm not rooting for them and I I don't want them to get together at the end of the movie.

• 1:27:09Chris Ryan?

  So why? Do you feel like because you want something different for one of the characters particularly, or you just don't think they're a good couple?

• 1:27:15Speaker 01

  I think that Danny is incredibly hot and has almost no other redeeming qualities. And I don't understand why, other than the fact that he is incredibly hot, Debbie would wanna be with him. Doesn't make sense to me.

• 1:27:29Bill Simmons?

  I think that's the only reason. What are his hobbies? He's like, big Cubs game tonight. Like, we don't even know that he likes.

• 1:27:36Chris Ryan?

  Chicago guy who likes Chicago sports teams, is playing a outdated, outmoded style of softball, doesn't have a college education and is selling like restaurant supplies.

• 1:27:48Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:27:48Chris Ryan?

  And is probably got like an 8% loan rate on on whatever he went into with the City Diner.

• 1:27:54Bill Simmons?

  It'd be funny if he was just like randomly like, he's a huge Salinger guy.

• 1:27:58Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:58Speaker 01

  I mean.

• 1:27:59Bill Simmons?

  It's like not just catching the rise, other stuff.

• 1:28:01Speaker 01

  Can you imagine?

• 1:28:01Chris Ryan?

  Nine stories, yes.

• 1:28:03Speaker 01

  When he's like, you know, it's it's what it is. No more, no less. I'm like, exactly. And that that is what it should have remained. Like, this is a phase you work through.

• 1:28:13Chris Ryan?

  Looks like now and that he has not lost a lot of miles per hour. Like, would you say that still?

• 1:28:20Speaker 01

  Hmm. Interesting question. I think Debbie was rewarded for.

• 1:28:24Chris Ryan?

  Was gonna lose his hair, wasn't gonna like get big, you know?

• 1:28:27Speaker 01

  Yeah. I mean, it's a great counterpoint.

• 1:28:29Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:30Speaker 01

  He's still, he's thriving.

• 1:28:32Bill Simmons?

  Casting what ifs, um, according to the Big Bad book of Bill Murray in 2015, Bill Murray and Nick Nolte were attached, but then had a argument when they met together and both backed out.

• 1:28:42Chris Ryan?

  It feels like a real like, let's do the play in the movie for Nolte to do it.

• 1:28:47Bill Simmons?

  With those two in the mid 80s, this movie, it's not work.

• 1:28:50Speaker 01

  Very different.

• 1:28:50Speaker 04

  Bill Murray and Demi Moore hooking up.

• 1:28:53Chris Ryan?

  I don't know if it was gonna be Demi Moore, but yeah.

• 1:28:54Speaker 01

  Different vibe.

• 1:28:55Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, they would have probably had to go older. Uh, in the Zwick book, he said Jonathan Demme was attached to direct and then had to back out because he was doing another one.

• 1:29:03Speaker 01

  That would have been good.

• 1:29:04Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:05Speaker 01

  Really good.

• 1:29:06Bill Simmons?

  Rob Lowe said he'd screen tested with Melissa Leo and Meryl Hemingway and were both in serious contention, but then Demme got the part.

• 1:29:13Chris Ryan?

  There is another rumor for Debbie, though.

• 1:29:15Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:29:16Chris Ryan?

  It's pretty important to talk about.

• 1:29:18Bill Simmons?

  I didn't know if I believed it, but go ahead.

• 1:29:19Chris Ryan?

  Phoebe Cates.

• 1:29:21Speaker 01

  I mean, Jesus Christ.

• 1:29:24Chris Ryan?

  We would have had.

• 1:29:25Speaker 01

  You wouldn't have. There's no way. There's no thumbs up from the stretcher for you. That's a that's a rap. That's a flat line for you.

• 1:29:33Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:33Speaker 04

  It's a Damar Hamlin situation. Did he make it or not?

• 1:29:37Bill Simmons?

  I'm not here.

• 1:29:39Speaker 01

  Oh, my God.

• 1:29:40Speaker 04

  Pause the movie for an hour. We gotta figure this out.

• 1:29:43Bill Simmons?

  They're crying at the set of ESPN.

• 1:29:45Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:47Bill Simmons?

  Joey Pantswear Best That Guy. The diner owner, I don't even know what that guy's name is. Danny's boss, George D'Amico?

• 1:29:54Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 1:29:55Bill Simmons?

  Who's been in a whole bunch of stuff and played Boog Liosi in the Helter Skelter movie, but I think the winner is Demi's, Demi Moore's boss.

• 1:30:03Chris Ryan?

  Robin Thomas.

• 1:30:04Bill Simmons?

  Who was the bad guy in summer school.

• 1:30:05Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 1:30:06Bill Simmons?

  And he's one of those guys. Do you know who that guy is? Yeah, he's one of those guys. Dion Waiters lady, uh, obviously, we know who's winning this. Shout out to the married lady.

• 1:30:16Chris Ryan?

  I'm looking at the gun. It says 105.

• 1:30:19Bill Simmons?

  Whoa, 106.

• 1:30:20Speaker 01

  Oh, man.

• 1:30:21Bill Simmons?

  Recasting Cast Director City. I wouldn't touch anything.

• 1:30:24Chris Ryan?

  Not even a token, could we do this in Boston from you?

• 1:30:27Bill Simmons?

  No.

• 1:30:27Chris Ryan?

  Okay.

• 1:30:28Speaker 01

  Hmm.

• 1:30:28Bill Simmons?

  I wouldn't touch it.

• 1:30:30Speaker 01

  Interesting.

• 1:30:30Bill Simmons?

  Might have given the Debbie like one more friend?

• 1:30:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:30:36Bill Simmons?

  For the four. I don't think.

• 1:30:37Chris Ryan?

  Can I just say, cuz we, I didn't know where to put this in terms of Dion, and I honestly couldn't spot her. But Catherine Keener is apparently in this movie.

• 1:30:46Bill Simmons?

  As like a waitress. Yeah, I couldn't see her either.

• 1:30:48Chris Ryan?

  Is she at Mothers? Like, I couldn't.

• 1:30:50Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:50Chris Ryan?

  I couldn't spot her.

• 1:30:52Speaker 01

  And I was too, I was too busy looking at Rob Lowe's side dick in the glow of the fridge light.

• 1:30:56Chris Ryan?

  I'm not, I'm not asking you to do more.

• 1:30:58Bill Simmons?

  You really rose to the occasion. No pun intended. Craig, you have a flex.

• 1:31:01Speaker 01

  Oh, man.

• 1:31:02Speaker 04

  Can I go hottest take?

• 1:31:03Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:31:04Speaker 04

  All respect to John Belushi, but Jim Belushi is funnier than John Belushi has ever been in a movie in this movie.

• 1:31:09Bill Simmons?

  That's finally a good hottest take.

• 1:31:11Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 1:31:11Chris Ryan?

  It's been a couple of episodes where we've been kinda like, we're kinda gaming. It's late summer. Nobody's really blowing any doors off. And then this fucking kid.

• 1:31:19Speaker 01

  Unbelievable stuff.

• 1:31:20Chris Ryan?

  Just a kid from San Diego.

• 1:31:24Speaker 01

  Can I ask Craig a question while we're here? So there's a line in this movie. There's a moment, Joan is a teacher. She's a teacher of of young children, Mulder of Mines. And while Joan is distracted on a call, eating her lunch, talking about fucking dudes, one of her students comes up to her and is like,

• 1:31:41Speaker 01

  pisses herself. And Joan says to her, "Everybody wets their pants. Nobody has to know." As the member of The Ringer who has most recently talked on a podcast publicly about pissing your pants, I was wondering if you had anything to say about this?

• 1:31:54Speaker 04

  Well, if you did listen to the episode, you would know that I I did piss my pants as a stunt double.

• 1:31:59Speaker 01

  Uh huh. Sure. Yeah.

• 1:32:00Speaker 04

  For Fred Armisen in the show Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, where I had to wear a pee rig as a P A on set to test out the pee rig cuz Fred Armisen and I had the same waist size. So I had to test out pee rigs.

• 1:32:11Speaker 01

  This is my favorite story.

• 1:32:12Chris Ryan?

  I wonder if this guy.

• 1:32:13Speaker 04

  Jon Hamm was there watching me pee my pants at 22 years old in New York.

• 1:32:17Chris Ryan?

  Did you think it was funny or was he just like?

• 1:32:19Speaker 04

  He seemed unbothered.

• 1:32:20Chris Ryan?

  Yeah. I mean, I'm sure on Mad Men, he saw worse.

• 1:32:24Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:32:25Chris Ryan?

  Do you wanna embellish at all about the Belushi thing? Because the thing I I love about this take is you're almost like, I'm coming at this from, I'm not, I I didn't grow up with John Belushi. I wasn't watching John Belushi on the weekends. Blues Brothers is not a big thing for me. So you're just going pure.

• 1:32:41Speaker 04

  I'm not, yeah, I'm not saying John was is ever bad in a movie. Like, but if you, if he's always a nine out of 10, I think this is a 10 out of 10 for his brother.

• 1:32:49Chris Ryan?

  Take the name off the back of the jersey and tell me who's funnier.

• 1:32:52Speaker 04

  John has like, obviously a style about him that's very unique, but just kinda from like an acting delivery standpoint, like this is better, in my opinion.

• 1:32:59Speaker 01

  Interesting.

• 1:32:59Bill Simmons?

  John never did a movie like this where he had to carry as much as Jim carries in this movie. But you could argue the Animal House performance was as funny just in.

• 1:33:08Speaker 04

  If you're most unique, you couldn't replace that Animal House. I also watched.

• 1:33:12Bill Simmons?

  I like the take.

• 1:33:12Speaker 04

  I don't know why, but I watched According to Jim like a decent amount of it.

• 1:33:15Speaker 01

  I was just gonna ask if you were a big According to Jim head cuz it feels like to Chris's point of view, coming at this from a different moment in time, like it maybe influenced your.

• 1:33:23Speaker 04

  I don't even think I've ever, what other movies is he in? Jim Belushi?

• 1:33:27Chris Ryan?

  Uh.

• 1:33:28Bill Simmons?

  Red Heat.

• 1:33:28Chris Ryan?

  Red Heat.

• 1:33:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:33:29Speaker 04

  I don't think I've seen him in a movie or anything except According to Jim.

• 1:33:32Chris Ryan?

  Real Men with John Ritter. I mean, he's, he did a bunch of 80s movies and then he was in Sick Hops.

• 1:33:36Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. I was, it was a pleasure to have him on the BS Podcast.

• 1:33:39Speaker 04

  I feel like he's great.

• 1:33:40Chris Ryan?

  I think he actually was a pretty big deal.

• 1:33:42Bill Simmons?

  He was on, I don't know how long According to Jim was on.

• 1:33:44Speaker 04

  It was like eight, nine seasons.

• 1:33:46Bill Simmons?

  He was just raking in money on that show.

• 1:33:48Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:33:49Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. When you get to like year six of those shows, you're there just whipping money.

• 1:33:53Chris Ryan?

  Named after you and like, yeah.

• 1:33:54Speaker 04

  But do you think the peeing the pants was inauthentic? It didn't look real? What's your qualm?

• 1:33:59Speaker 01

  I just wanted your, your, you're a piss in your pants expert, so I thought you needed to comment, you know? As usual, I had some hygiene questions about just like wiping it up with a sandwich wrapper and then not washing your hands.

• 1:34:10Speaker 04

  It's probably complicated to do that.

• 1:34:12Speaker 01

  Probably. Maybe it was real. Maybe it wasn't a pee rig.

• 1:34:16Speaker 04

  Mine was, mine was real.

• 1:34:17Bill Simmons?

  I did it on my half ass.

• 1:34:19Speaker 01

  I know it was.

• 1:34:21Bill Simmons?

  So the big half ass thing is the dating history of Demi Moore and Rob Lowe and what's true and not true, which it just sounds like neither of them even know at this point, 40 years later. Apex Mountain, Rob Lowe?

• 1:34:33Chris Ryan?

  I think so.

• 1:34:33Bill Simmons?

  I'm gonna say, yeah.

• 1:34:34Chris Ryan?

  Well, I would probably say West Wing is this west, like peak West Wing is this.

• 1:34:39Bill Simmons?

  When did Rob Lowe have the most juice? Because when Rob Lowe left West Wing, that was a massive deal.

• 1:34:45Chris Ryan?

  That was like a big like-

• 1:34:46Bill Simmons?

  Star of West Wing.

• 1:34:47Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:34:48Bill Simmons?

  He was one of the people on it, but he wasn't the star. This was like, he's still toe to toe with Cruise in the mid eighties. I would say it's right around here.

• 1:34:55Speaker 01

  Interesting.

• 1:34:57Bill Simmons?

  Demi Moore, no.

• 1:34:58Speaker 01

  Certainly not. Landman, season two.

• 1:35:02Bill Simmons?

  Jim Belushi.

• 1:35:05Bill Simmons?

  Probably season six of According to Jim.

• 1:35:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:35:09Bill Simmons?

  Breakup scenes. What's the best breakup scene ever?

• 1:35:13Speaker 01

  Well, a breakup that sticks or just a, just a knock down, drag out. This is a devastating fight.

• 1:35:18Chris Ryan?

  I think, I actually think Before Midnight.

• 1:35:20Speaker 01

  That's what I was gonna say. Before Midnight is definitely the answer.

• 1:35:22Chris Ryan?

  That's the one that you won't even like touch because it's too-

• 1:35:25Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I don't know. I didn't want to watch that movie.

• 1:35:26Speaker 01

  As you know, I think it's the best of the three.

• 1:35:28Bill Simmons?

  That's probably the answer.

• 1:35:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:35:30Bill Simmons?

  Elizabeth Perkins, I think it's probably big and after.

• 1:35:33Chris Ryan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:35:33Speaker 01

  Yeah. Miracle on Thirty Fourth Street.

• 1:35:35Bill Simmons?

  New Year's Eve rom com scenes.

• 1:35:37Speaker 01

  Hmm.

• 1:35:38Bill Simmons?

  Lot of, lot to put from here, including When Harry Met Sally.

• 1:35:41Chris Ryan?

  Right.

• 1:35:42Bill Simmons?

  Do you want to spend the rest of your life with someone? You want the rest of your life? You start as soon as possible.

• 1:35:46Speaker 01

  I think that, that has the edge.

• 1:35:49Bill Simmons?

  I think that's the edge.

• 1:35:49Speaker 01

  That has the edge.

• 1:35:50Chris Ryan?

  That's it.

• 1:35:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:35:52Bill Simmons?

  Rom coms?

• 1:35:53Chris Ryan?

  No.

• 1:35:54Speaker 01

  Absolutely not.

• 1:35:55Bill Simmons?

  Bars and movies. Talked about this earlier. It's way up there.

• 1:35:59Speaker 01

  I just want a quiet, old fashioned at the Continental. I don't know. That's what I'm looking for.

• 1:36:04Chris Ryan?

  At the Continental from John Wick?

• 1:36:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:36:07Chris Ryan?

  What's the bar in Thief? Greenies or something like that?

• 1:36:12Bill Simmons?

  That's, that's more- This should just be a special rewatchable episode.

• 1:36:15Chris Ryan?

  Of bars?

• 1:36:15Bill Simmons?

  We count down our 12 best bars ever in a movie.

• 1:36:18Speaker 01

  I mean, you could do that as a recurring series. You could do the full definitive house list, the bars, all of it. That'd be great. People would love that.

• 1:36:24Bill Simmons?

  Chicago softball, definitely. Chicago movies, no. Chicago period, I think, yes. Eighty-six, right after the eighty-five Bears. Jordan's there. They're filming movies there left and right.

• 1:36:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:36:34Bill Simmons?

  Fucking amazing. Cruise or Hanks?

• 1:36:37Chris Ryan?

  Cruise.

• 1:36:37Speaker 01

  Cruise would be a great Danny, I think. Great.

• 1:36:39Bill Simmons?

  Cruise would be good.

• 1:36:40Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:36:40Bill Simmons?

  Was there a better title for this movie?

• 1:36:42Chris Ryan?

  I like Sexual Perversity in Chicago, but I don't really find this movie that perverse, so.

• 1:36:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:36:47Bill Simmons?

  I like About Last Night.

• 1:36:48Chris Ryan?

  About Last Night's really good. And I like The Ellipsis.

• 1:36:51Bill Simmons?

  The Billy Bats Jack Waltz Award for most biting and scalable insult was your hottest take?

• 1:36:56Chris Ryan?

  What's my hottest take?

• 1:36:57Bill Simmons?

  I mean, not your hottest take, your flex.

• 1:36:58Speaker 01

  Your flex?

• 1:36:59Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 1:37:02Bill Simmons?

  The new category of the Mila Kunis Forgetting Sarah Marshall Award for is this the hottest? Anyone this person has ever been in a movie?

• 1:37:12Speaker 01

  Oh, man.

• 1:37:12Bill Simmons?

  You can answer for Rob Lowe.

• 1:37:15Speaker 01

  Oh, God. I don't think so, just because eighty's hair is not my personal vibe.

• 1:37:20Bill Simmons?

  Okay.

• 1:37:20Speaker 01

  So, and, and I, as you know, prefer an older man.

• 1:37:22Bill Simmons?

  Okay, so you go-

• 1:37:25Speaker 01

  I would, I just would prefer him in like West Wing or Parks and Rec as he aged in a very refined fashion for Rob Lowe.

• 1:37:32Bill Simmons?

  And what's the Demi Moore answer? Could basically change for any movie.

• 1:37:36Chris Ryan?

  I was gonna say.

• 1:37:36Speaker 01

  I mean-

• 1:37:37Chris Ryan?

  I'm going G I Jane.

• 1:37:40Chris Ryan?

  I'm going Substance.

• 1:37:41Speaker 01

  Indecent Proposal.

• 1:37:42Bill Simmons?

  I think it's Indecent Proposal.

• 1:37:44Speaker 01

  Yeah. That's real, that's tough to top.

• 1:37:46Chris Ryan?

  What year is that?

• 1:37:47Speaker 01

  Ninety-three. Ninety-two, ninety-three, ninety-three. That's, that's electric.

• 1:37:55Bill Simmons?

  Great stuff by her.

• 1:37:56Chris Ryan?

  When is Disclosure?

• 1:37:57Bill Simmons?

  We did, oh, Disclosure, she looks great, too.

• 1:38:00Speaker 01

  That's-

• 1:38:01Bill Simmons?

  That's like two years after.

• 1:38:02Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:38:04Chris Ryan?

  It's early nineties.

• 1:38:04Bill Simmons?

  Kind of quietly done a lot of Demi Moore movies.

• 1:38:06Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:38:07Speaker 01

  No surprise.

• 1:38:08Chris Ryan?

  She's racked up a lot-

• 1:38:08Bill Simmons?

  We did About Last Night, Ghost, Ghost, Sin, Almost Fire, Disclosure, Few Good Men.

• 1:38:15Speaker 01

  Yeah. We did Indecent Proposal.

• 1:38:18Bill Simmons?

  Indecent Proposal. That's seven. Pretty good.

• 1:38:22Chris Ryan?

  Margin Call. She's in that.

• 1:38:24Bill Simmons?

  Oh, yeah. Eight. Wow, she's moving up the rankings. Jesus. Picking Knits. Debbie's friend hitting on Danny's never sat right with me, but maybe that's just the character.

• 1:38:33Chris Ryan?

  There's a couple of friend fouls in here that I think would have caused some more, more drama.

• 1:38:38Bill Simmons?

  It's three years, Abe. You're not doing that.

• 1:38:39Speaker 01

  I believe Pat would do it. The picking knit to me is that Debbie still hangs out with her after that.

• 1:38:44Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:38:44Speaker 01

  That's crazy. Like, she saw. She saw this.

• 1:38:47Chris Ryan?

  Right. So, I have-

• 1:38:49Bill Simmons?

  Wouldn't she get mad at Pat?

• 1:38:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, exactly. The fact that they're just hanging out after is like nuts.

• 1:38:54Bill Simmons?

  The movie can't decide if they're friends or not.

• 1:38:56Chris Ryan?

  I have a movie breaking picking knit.

• 1:38:58Speaker 01

  Oh, boy.

• 1:38:59Chris Ryan?

  This time around and just in general.

• 1:39:01Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:39:01Chris Ryan?

  I don't care if Fabio has had, had me execute Gus in front of his family. And then as I come home, I find out that the, the Chicago fire has broken out again. If I walk in my apartment and Demi Moore is painting it without a bra on.

• 1:39:18Speaker 01

  You're gonna fuck.

• 1:39:19Chris Ryan?

  I'm, I'm happy about my life.

• 1:39:20Bill Simmons?

  You're gonna have to, you're gonna have a conversation.

• 1:39:22Chris Ryan?

  Him coming home and she's wearing fucking, like, what is it? Like a tank top with no bra and overalls? And he's like, hey, Danny? And he's just like, huh.

• 1:39:32Speaker 01

  Just looking at the paint on the palm of his hand.

• 1:39:34Chris Ryan?

  Ball and chain here busting my chops, painting the house. It's like, are you, there's, maybe no one's ever looked hotter for like 12 seconds. Right there.

• 1:39:44Bill Simmons?

  It's like the other guys. Oh, the ball chain!

• 1:39:47Chris Ryan?

  It's nuts that he's like-

• 1:39:49Bill Simmons?

  That's what you're wearing?

• 1:39:50Speaker 01

  This is a great one, Chris. Great one.

• 1:39:52Bill Simmons?

  Great one. Really good, Sierra. Uh, the breakup scene's incredible, but the, she turns the lights on and then at the end, the lights are off again?

• 1:39:59Speaker 01

  Yeah, there's some continuity. You can't, is it just because they're zoomed out?

• 1:40:02Bill Simmons?

  No, it gets dark again.

• 1:40:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:40:04Chris Ryan?

  I think I then lost the thread there.

• 1:40:07Bill Simmons?

  Dan having the money to reopen the diner.

• 1:40:10Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:40:10Bill Simmons?

  I didn't even own eighty-six before the first crash. I don't know if you're just like, yeah. Got a hundred grand here. Open a diner.

• 1:40:17Chris Ryan?

  Dan doesn't have a fucking hundred grand.

• 1:40:19Bill Simmons?

  He's like twenty-two. The bank's like, here.

• 1:40:21Speaker 01

  I know. God. I, I think the way that this guy who is canonically established as twenty-four years old, talks about his career is definitely in the picking this category.

• 1:40:32Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:40:32Speaker 01

  Honey, it's what I do. I've spent my life stuffing more unneeded restaurant supplies on the shelves of more unneeded restaurants than any other salesman in Chicago.

• 1:40:42Bill Simmons?

  He's like twenty-three.

• 1:40:42Speaker 01

  What? Is he talking about this? It's insane. For Debbie, if you don't want your Girl Scouts hope chest.

• 1:40:52Speaker 01

  His with the heart stitched all around it, little like homemade bandana cloth to be used to wipe up tea. Don't keep it in a basket on the kitchen table.

• 1:41:02Chris Ryan?

  You're really team Danny, aren't you?

• 1:41:03Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, put that in your top shelf.

• 1:41:05Speaker 01

  I'm team neither.

• 1:41:06Bill Simmons?

  She really thinks Debbie's cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs is-

• 1:41:09Speaker 01

  She's a loon. She's an absolute loon.

• 1:41:11Chris Ryan?

  That's cra- I think she's literally perfect.

• 1:41:13Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. I loved it, too.

• 1:41:15Speaker 01

  I love her. I love her.

• 1:41:17Chris Ryan?

  She seems awesome. She, she seems like she'd be like, what do you want to watch?

• 1:41:20Speaker 01

  I think that Danny is a nothing. Debbie is a winner, but with like a, a tendency to just fall into these fits of hysterics that feels, um. Like an intentional choice.

• 1:41:31Chris Ryan?

  There's also like a little bit of like, when Debbie first starts dating Danny, he's like, hey, I got this secret place to watch the Cubs games. It's like, cool. But then when you move in and it's like, so you, like every single piece of clothing you have is Bears, Blackhawks, or Cubs? Like, what are we doing here?

• 1:41:44Speaker 01

  That's great. That's like my wardrobe.

• 1:41:45Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:46Bill Simmons?

  I have a couple of small picking knits. Um, I would have loved to have seen some of the basketball game with Danny.

• 1:41:51Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yes. Yeah.

• 1:41:53Bill Simmons?

  Would, did Bernie play? Like, just what were the dynamics? Was Danny a point guard, shooting guard? I just had a lot of questions.

• 1:41:58Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:58Speaker 01

  He's a two guard, for sure.

• 1:41:59Chris Ryan?

  He feels very Maravichy me, to me.

• 1:42:02Speaker 01

  Incredible.

• 1:42:03Bill Simmons?

  Debbie's boss, like, by the way, definitely would have been hooking up with the, that's not a picking knit. He was so kind of skeevy.

• 1:42:11Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. Yeah.

• 1:42:13Bill Simmons?

  I didn't, that one didn't add up to me.

• 1:42:14Chris Ryan?

  He's not even making like a, he's like very openly like pursuing her, dating her, like checking in on her.

• 1:42:20Speaker 01

  He's like turning the lights off at the holiday party, pinning her against the copy machine and she's like, I don't want this.

• 1:42:26Chris Ryan?

  Cameo from Willie Gold to that ho- holiday party.

• 1:42:28Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:42:29Speaker 01

  That's right. That's right.

• 1:42:30Bill Simmons?

  I don't see Deb going for him.

• 1:42:33Bill Simmons?

  Not our Deb. Sequel, prequel, prestige, she'd be all black cast or untouchable. This happened.

• 1:42:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:42:38Bill Simmons?

  They sequed it in two thousand fourteen. They did the all black cast.

• 1:42:41Chris Ryan?

  And Lowe has said that there was various efforts to make a Danny and Debbie check-in movie at various points.

• 1:42:48Bill Simmons?

  So, if they did that, it's probably after he has juice from the West Wing. And she's just starting to date Ashton Kutcher, trying to kind of reinvent herself a little bit. Maybe it's like a fifteen years later.

• 1:43:02Speaker 01

  But what's the plot of that movie that makes sense to you and feels worthwhile?

• 1:43:06Bill Simmons?

  There is a one. That's why it didn't happen.

• 1:43:08Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:43:08Speaker 01

  What if they're divorced, but they have a kid? And so they have to see each other at some of the like, oh, who's picking up?

• 1:43:15Bill Simmons?

  Kids softball games?

• 1:43:16Speaker 01

  Exactly. It's your day to pick up for, oh, across the way, you brought the orange slices today. And then they fall back into it.

• 1:43:22Chris Ryan?

  I mean, I can, I can be convinced, yeah.

• 1:43:24Speaker 01

  I would watch that.

• 1:43:25Bill Simmons?

  Bernie's dead.

• 1:43:27Chris Ryan?

  I had a question about that.

• 1:43:28Bill Simmons?

  Out of a heart attack.

• 1:43:29Speaker 01

  For sure Bernie's dead. There's no question about it.

• 1:43:31Chris Ryan?

  This was unanswerable questions, but do you think Bernie made it to the Cubs World Series?

• 1:43:35Bill Simmons?

  Two thousand sixteen?

• 1:43:36Speaker 01

  There's no chance. There's no chance.

• 1:43:40Bill Simmons?

  They had his picture up.

• 1:43:41Chris Ryan?

  Bernie got his head caved in at Mothers one night by talking shit to somebody's girlfriend and somebody caved his head in.

• 1:43:50Bill Simmons?

  I forgot another picking knit is that nobody mentions MJ in this movie.

• 1:43:53Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:43:53Speaker 01

  That's weird. Yeah.

• 1:43:54Bill Simmons?

  They kind of slowed him in or we could have seen Jersey or something. Uh. Is this movie better with Wayne Jenkins, Fergie the Flores, Zane Lowe, Robert Evans, Dr. Charles Nickel, Ted Levine, or someone else?

• 1:44:06Chris Ryan?

  Ladies and gentlemen, my friend Bernard Litko does not feel well, obviously. So if you just go on with your dessert and coffee, I'll be right back.

• 1:44:18Speaker 01

  Amazing.

• 1:44:19Chris Ryan?

  Chicago, get a little, little Dr. Charles Nichols in there? Maybe Walt Bernie's like mid flak jacket story?

• 1:44:26Speaker 01

  That's fantastic pick. Wonderful. I thought you might give us a, a little Wayne Jenkins, but he's actually Mikey from the Bear.

• 1:44:33Chris Ryan?

  Oh, yeah. Because it would be Chicago.

• 1:44:35Speaker 01

  It would be Chicago. I thought you might have done that, but no.

• 1:44:37Bill Simmons?

  Mikey from the Bear would have been a good one. I was gonna do a Ryan Ruko, but I'm not gonna do it. Something with the, tied in with the sex scene. Now Demi's on top. Got it!

• 1:44:52Bill Simmons?

  She's painting the house, it's a wrong thing.

• 1:44:58Bill Simmons?

  Now she's gonna ride him, you bet.

• 1:45:02Bill Simmons?

  Just wanna ask her who gets it. I go Demi, you go Perkins.

• 1:45:05Chris Ryan?

  Perkins.

• 1:45:06Speaker 01

  Perkins. What's for breakfast? Egg McMuffin, corner of Broadway and Belmont.

• 1:45:13Bill Simmons?

  So what name word? What happened the next day? Did they get married?

• 1:45:17Chris Ryan?

  I didn't have that. I had city diner goes out of business, Mr. Favio sticks the Chicago mob on Danny and Lindco for stealing restaurant supplies.

• 1:45:24Speaker 01

  Ooh.

• 1:45:24Bill Simmons?

  Oh, I like it.

• 1:45:25Speaker 01

  I had the ex.

• 1:45:26Bill Simmons?

  That's about last night, too.

• 1:45:27Speaker 01

  Alex, she of the fur coat, who he fucked at the motel, calls and is like.

• 1:45:32Chris Ryan?

  Pregnant.

• 1:45:33Speaker 01

  I gave you chlamydia.

• 1:45:34Chris Ryan?

  Oh.

• 1:45:35Bill Simmons?

  Oh, I thought you were gonna say something worse. It was 1986.

• 1:45:37Speaker 01

  I gave you chlamydia, or gonorrhea, or genital warts, something. You know, paying off the prophecy of Joan saying, I think he's gonna get a disease.

• 1:45:45Bill Simmons?

  Oh.

• 1:45:46Chris Ryan?

  Oh, right.

• 1:45:47Speaker 01

  This guy's fucking his way around town. And then they break up again.

• 1:45:50Bill Simmons?

  An answerable, were Bernie's stories real?

• 1:45:53Chris Ryan?

  No.

• 1:45:53Speaker 01

  No, of course not. Of course not.

• 1:45:56Chris Ryan?

  Did we ever see Bernie go home with a girl?

• 1:45:59Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:45:59Chris Ryan?

  Other than Joan?

• 1:46:02Speaker 01

  Sadly didn't get to see that either. It's just inferred.

• 1:46:05Chris Ryan?

  Um, my own answerable was, are all four of these characters from Chicago or the surrounding area?

• 1:46:11Speaker 01

  Oh, interesting.

• 1:46:12Chris Ryan?

  I think Bernie and Danny are. Do you think Deb?

• 1:46:15Bill Simmons?

  Jones from like Winnetka?

• 1:46:17Chris Ryan?

  Yeah. I mean, I guess in this era, people were a little bit more regional, right? Like you wouldn't.

• 1:46:21Bill Simmons?

  Who's more like, most likely to be from the John, the John Hughes town?

• 1:46:24Chris Ryan?

  Oh, Deb.

• 1:46:25Speaker 01

  Deb, for sure.

• 1:46:26Chris Ryan?

  Deb.

• 1:46:26Speaker 01

  I think Debbie came to Chicago for college and stayed.

• 1:46:31Chris Ryan?

  Like went to art school or whatever?

• 1:46:32Speaker 01

  Yeah. She wearing the Northwestern sweatshirt at some point, but yeah, she's doing the, the advertising agency art stuff. She stayed. She's not, I don't think, I don't think she grew up here, but I agree with you. Like Bernie is of the city.

• 1:46:42Chris Ryan?

  But I think that Joan and Deb met like on.

• 1:46:45Speaker 01

  They met in.

• 1:46:45Chris Ryan?

  A roommate's thing.

• 1:46:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, college or after college. We know they didn't know each other before then because of the high school conversation. So they didn't grow up together.

• 1:46:53Speaker 04

  Cause she also says we've been friends a long time, but they're like 23.

• 1:46:57Speaker 01

  Everyone in the movie talks like they're 57.

• 1:46:59Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:47:00Speaker 01

  And they're not.

• 1:47:01Bill Simmons?

  Memorabilia you'd most want from the movie. I, give me anything Mother's Malone.

• 1:47:05Speaker 01

  It's gotta be the, I think the Mother's softball jersey.

• 1:47:07Bill Simmons?

  T-shirt, hat.

• 1:47:09Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:47:11Bill Simmons?

  I'll take anything, whatever's available.

• 1:47:12Chris Ryan?

  Not the Jordans?

• 1:47:14Speaker 01

  Well, those would be, I mean, that would be.

• 1:47:16Bill Simmons?

  So Bratlow had kept the Jordans from About Last Night, which are the most expensive addition of those Jordans.

• 1:47:22Speaker 01

  That's like a impossible shoe. That would be a great one to have.

• 1:47:25Chris Ryan?

  Have they reissued them though?

• 1:47:27Speaker 01

  Oh, well, yeah, they put out the breads pretty regularly, but like the actual, the band from 84, that's an iconic piece of sneaker history.

• 1:47:37Chris Ryan?

  What is the band?

• 1:47:38Speaker 01

  Well, the band, the story around like, oh, the colorway, right? It's banned, can't wear them. He's gonna get fined every time he wears them. So there's the bread, the bread, the bread toe.

• 1:47:48Speaker 01

  But then banned is a subset of that.

• 1:47:49Chris Ryan?

  Gotcha.

• 1:47:50Speaker 01

  I think. This is my, sorry, I did all the sneaker ads out there from getting this wrong. The Jordans would be a great, that would be like an investment.

• 1:47:55Bill Simmons?

  Mother's Malone is probably a little more serviceable. Coach Finstock, Mr. Miyagi, what are best, worst life lesson?

• 1:48:00Speaker 01

  Hmm. I think don't ever lose your sense of humor, Dan. That's a good one. That's a good one. Yeah.

• 1:48:07Bill Simmons?

  Double feature?

• 1:48:10Bill Simmons?

  Did you go Chicago?

• 1:48:14Chris Ryan?

  I, I mean, I think if you wanted to watch more Demi and Rob, I would just watch San Onofre.

• 1:48:18Speaker 01

  That was my pick too.

• 1:48:19Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:48:19Speaker 01

  Especially because they're so proximate to each other in time.

• 1:48:21Bill Simmons?

  Who won the movie?

• 1:48:23Speaker 01

  Belushi.

• 1:48:23Chris Ryan?

  Belushi. I think it's true. I think it is true.

• 1:48:27Speaker 01

  There's no question.

• 1:48:28Bill Simmons?

  I have Demi.

• 1:48:29Speaker 01

  Of course you do.

• 1:48:30Chris Ryan?

  Of course I do.

• 1:48:33Bill Simmons?

  Who won the movie?

• 1:48:34Speaker 04

  To me.

• 1:48:36Bill Simmons?

  Let's hear it, Craig. You didn't see this movie?

• 1:48:38Speaker 01

  Did you love it?

• 1:48:39Speaker 04

  I loved it. Five star classic.

• 1:48:42Chris Ryan?

  It's like all you want from a movie, right?

• 1:48:43Speaker 04

  All I want from a movie.

• 1:48:44Speaker 01

  Oh my god.

• 1:48:45Bill Simmons?

  Did you watch it with Liz or solo?

• 1:48:46Speaker 04

  Liz was, was at dinner, so I watched it solo. I almost did the, the okay motherfucker award for like, when the sex montage begins?

• 1:48:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:48:55Speaker 04

  I like, I was kinda laying on my side. I actively kinda sat up.

• 1:48:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:48:58Speaker 04

  Alright, this is what we're doing now.

• 1:49:00Speaker 01

  I bet.

• 1:49:00Speaker 04

  It's actually bizarre. The nudity in this movie is astonishing.

• 1:49:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:49:04Speaker 04

  Like it is just so not what they would do now. The fact that these actors were 21 years old and they're like, we're gonna do real intense, passionate lovemaking.

• 1:49:12Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 1:49:13Speaker 04

  Full nude.

• 1:49:14Chris Ryan?

  Multiple times throughout the movie.

• 1:49:15Speaker 04

  Multiple times. I, I guess it helps the story, probably not super necessary to do it as much as they did. You might need a little bit of it.

• 1:49:22Speaker 01

  Disagree.

• 1:49:23Bill Simmons?

  I actually thought it did help the story.

• 1:49:25Speaker 04

  It does. It's like, makes it centered around the fact that like, the only thing they are good with together is like having sex.

• 1:49:30Speaker 01

  You have to believe that they love having sex with each other. There's no other reason for them to wanna be around each other.

• 1:49:37Speaker 04

  Is like softcore porn. Like it's like, it's like Skinamax. It's like a very.

• 1:49:40Speaker 01

  No question.

• 1:49:41Speaker 04

  Yeah, you know, like the way it's made is very specific.

• 1:49:43Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:49:44Speaker 04

  Um, yeah, they went four for four on the casting, like the Chicago of it all. I loved every bit of it. It was great.

• 1:49:50Bill Simmons?

  I'm so not surprised. I'm, I'm, I'm pleased. I feel seen.

• 1:49:54Speaker 04

  I do think, um, I, I thought the only weird part of the movie was like, they're just too young. I, I think like it all works.

• 1:50:01Chris Ryan?

  But I think that there was a little bit of like.

• 1:50:03Speaker 04

  They're 27, I feel like the problems make more sense.

• 1:50:06Chris Ryan?

  In the eighties, I think there was less, yeah, just use your twenties to figure out who you are. I think it was a little bit more like, go to college, get a job, and then get.

• 1:50:14Speaker 04

  Yeah, I didn't quite buy the like, they're 23 or whatever, they move in and they feel like, like they can't go out on New Year's Eve because they have to make dinner and celebrate alone.

• 1:50:22Speaker 01

  And one of them's like, I'm not thinking about marriage. And the other one's like, I wanna have 10 kids. I, I think this is like.

• 1:50:26Speaker 04

  Like, why do you have to host Thanksgiving? Do you not have families? Like where?

• 1:50:29Speaker 01

  You're both right. I think this feels weird now, and I think you're right that it feels weird because it's 2026 and that it wouldn't have felt weird.

• 1:50:36Bill Simmons?

  By the way, that's your answer for where are they from?

• 1:50:39Chris Ryan?

  Oh, they must not be from Chicago.

• 1:50:40Bill Simmons?

  There's no family.

• 1:50:41Speaker 04

  None of them mentioned their family for Thanksgiving. They all, when you're 23 or whatever, you go home.

• 1:50:45Chris Ryan?

  How did Danny wind up in the restaurant supply business at 18?

• 1:50:49Speaker 01

  Maybe it's just a big show of like, we're doing our first independent thing.

• 1:50:51Speaker 04

  There's like a 23 year old being like, I put pecans in the dressing. I'm like, this is not, if it was a movie about the crisis of like turning 30, maybe this plays better. They just all felt a little young.

• 1:51:01Speaker 01

  I, I agree with you.

• 1:51:02Bill Simmons?

  I do think that was the era a little bit though, where some people just didn't go to college.

• 1:51:06Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:51:06Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:51:06Bill Simmons?

  And they started working when they were 18 and then they're 23.

• 1:51:09Chris Ryan?

  No, I just mean like, but Danny's mom would probably be like, you can come home and do your laundry every, every weekend if you want to.

• 1:51:14Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. With that said, if the family's in there, we don't get the Thanksgiving scene of just the four of them. We get like an annoying.

• 1:51:21Speaker 01

  And we're the poor for it.

• 1:51:22Speaker 04

  Yeah, I also really liked the ending.

• 1:51:24Chris Ryan?

  Great detail that like, they're all like, we're gonna go to like a bar after Thanksgiving dinner, you know?

• 1:51:28Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:51:29Bill Simmons?

  So you liked the ending?

• 1:51:30Speaker 04

  I, I thought the ending was really sweet. And honestly, kind of realistic. I, when you're like in your early twenties and everyone's doing the breakup, get back together thing, I actually think the way it plays out at the end of the movie would happen in real life. Where like they have a horrible breakup and like three months later, they're like, should we try it again? Like, yeah, fuck it.

• 1:51:46Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:51:47Speaker 04

  That's real.

• 1:51:48Bill Simmons?

  You know who never had a horrible breakup? Craig and Liz. Just unassailable love from day one.

• 1:51:54Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:51:54Speaker 01

  That one's strong.

• 1:51:55Chris Ryan?

  Hitler streak.

• 1:51:56Bill Simmons?

  I knew immediately as soon as, as soon as they started dating, I was like, that's a wrap.

• 1:52:01Speaker 04

  By the way.

• 1:52:01Bill Simmons?

  First Ringer wedding.

• 1:52:02Speaker 04

  Gahow slacked me during this. The Ringer has a soccer team. We should, we can go to those games.

• 1:52:06Chris Ryan?

  This is bullshit. What are you talking about?

• 1:52:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, really nice of them.

• 1:52:08Chris Ryan?

  No.

• 1:52:09Speaker 04

  The Ringer has a soccer team. Gahow, I think Jomie's on it. People play. Maybe Kai?

• 1:52:13Chris Ryan?

  What's happening?

• 1:52:14Speaker 04

  There's a soccer team. There's a league that Ringer staffers play in.

• 1:52:18Chris Ryan?

  I thought that we used to have guys who played soccer and there was one to many.

• 1:52:21Bill Simmons?

  I would 100% go to a Ringer soccer game.

• 1:52:22Speaker 04

  Well, it exists.

• 1:52:23Chris Ryan?

  Where, ask them where it is. Where do they play?

• 1:52:26Bill Simmons?

  They play at Heroin Needle Park.

• 1:52:27Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:52:30Bill Simmons?

  That sounds great.

• 1:52:31Speaker 04

  He's typing, Gahow's typing.

• 1:52:32Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:52:34Speaker 04

  We play at John Ferraro.

• 1:52:35Bill Simmons?

  They play at Fentanyl Field.

• 1:52:38Speaker 04

  I don't know who John Ferraro is.

• 1:52:39Bill Simmons?

  John Ferraro.

• 1:52:40Speaker 04

  I don't know.

• 1:52:40Bill Simmons?

  Ringer side, I'm 1,000% going to a Ringer soccer game.

• 1:52:44Speaker 04

  He said it's off the five.

• 1:52:47Bill Simmons?

  Can, can Zoe Simmons play a, a guest game on the Ringer soccer team?

• 1:52:52Speaker 04

  I bet it's, yeah. Oh, I'm looking at this park now. It looks lovely. Yeah, we used to play in a basketball league back in the days of like Richie and Micah.

• 1:52:59Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:52:59Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:53:01Chris Ryan?

  Didn't everybody blow their Achilles out during that though?

• 1:53:03Speaker 04

  I think everybody was afraid they were going to because Hyphitz was chasing them down.

• 1:53:07Chris Ryan?

  Oh, cause Hyphitz is all Steve.

• 1:53:08Bill Simmons?

  That was when the legend of Hyphitz really started when.

• 1:53:11Speaker 04

  He was like Ronnie Lott.

• 1:53:12Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, he was like Ron Artest crossed with the football safety. Like people actively didn't want him to play.

• 1:53:18Speaker 04

  You would like, if it was him coming down like the barrel on a fast break at you, like you bail out of the lane.

• 1:53:22Chris Ryan?

  I feel like I've watched Hyphitz's entire life happen.

• 1:53:25Speaker 01

  We have.

• 1:53:25Chris Ryan?

  Like he's gone from being like this overzealous kid to being like, fridge ham. Think about it, you know?

• 1:53:30Speaker 01

  Beach ham.

• 1:53:31Chris Ryan?

  Beach ham, right.

• 1:53:32Speaker 01

  How dare you?

• 1:53:33Chris Ryan?

  He's like, he's 62 now.

• 1:53:35Speaker 01

  I think Beach Ham is inspired. I side with Hyphitz.

• 1:53:38Chris Ryan?

  And he'll probably die soon of like a fantasy football commissioner related.

• 1:53:41Speaker 04

  He talks about his like, his, his wide shoes that he has to wear because of his feet.

• 1:53:46Speaker 01

  He's the best.

• 1:53:46Speaker 04

  The Brooks, the Brooks fives.

• 1:53:48Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:53:49Bill Simmons?

  Quirky. Ringer soccer team. Maybe we should start a 16 inch softball team.

• 1:53:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, why not?

• 1:53:56Speaker 04

  We should.

• 1:53:56Speaker 01

  Why not?

• 1:53:57Speaker 04

  I mean, there are, there are like leagues we could join. We're, I think, um.

• 1:54:01Speaker 01

  What about flag football?

• 1:54:02Bill Simmons?

  It'd be funny if it was like, Bill's insisting he's pitching again.

• 1:54:07Speaker 04

  Bill keeps getting smoked. What, what sport do you think the Ringer is best suited to compete in?

• 1:54:12Speaker 01

  Oh, interesting question.

• 1:54:15Speaker 04

  If we're playing other like media companies or whatever.

• 1:54:17Speaker 01

  Just the LA group?

• 1:54:18Chris Ryan?

  I mean, honestly, probably trivia.

• 1:54:21Speaker 01

  No, I don't know.

• 1:54:21Bill Simmons?

  If we're playing media companies, we'd have an advantage.

• 1:54:24Speaker 04

  You think?

• 1:54:24Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, cause we have a lot of younger people.

• 1:54:26Speaker 04

  What sport though?

• 1:54:28Speaker 01

  Just the LA group for in person?

• 1:54:29Bill Simmons?

  We did for basketball in the past.

• 1:54:31Speaker 01

  We have some sneaky tall.

• 1:54:32Bill Simmons?

  Maybe the soccer.

• 1:54:33Speaker 04

  Mahoney's tall.

• 1:54:34Speaker 01

  Mahoney's tall. Joe's tall. Flyin', Isaac, he's tall. Craig is tall.

• 1:54:39Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:54:39Speaker 01

  Other Craig is tall.

• 1:54:40Bill Simmons?

  J. Kyle Mann's still playing.

• 1:54:42Speaker 01

  That's right.

• 1:54:42Speaker 04

  Oh, is that right?

• 1:54:43Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Jacoby.

• 1:54:45Speaker 01

  Oh, Jacoby.

• 1:54:46Bill Simmons?

  Last legs.

• 1:54:46Speaker 04

  We throw Hyphitz in like PJ Tucker.

• 1:54:49Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, no, Hyphitz is like the Morris twins.

• 1:54:52Speaker 04

  Lance Stevenson.

• 1:54:53Speaker 01

  I think that we would have a good softball team. I do.

• 1:54:56Chris Ryan?

  We'll workshop this.

• 1:54:57Speaker 01

  Kickball? Kickball?

• 1:55:00Chris Ryan?

  I wonder if me and Adam Friedland should start managing the soccer team.

• 1:55:05Bill Simmons?

  He's calling you nine times a day. Thinking about putting Hyphitz at sweeper. Um, alright, About Last Night. So glad we did it. Fourth anniversary. Check it out on Netflix. Thanks to Craig. Thanks to Gahow. Uh, I don't know. I feel like we've peaked.

• 1:55:20Speaker 04

  You wanna announce next week now that it's already taped?

• 1:55:22Bill Simmons?

  Oh yeah, The Respeed is, uh, gonna be Monday.

• 1:55:24Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 1:55:26Bill Simmons?

  One of the first ones we've ever done.

• 1:55:27Speaker 04

  On Netflix.

• 1:55:28Bill Simmons?

  And it's on Netflix right now?

• 1:55:30Chris Ryan?

  And that movie fucking rocks.

• 1:55:31Bill Simmons?

  That movie is.

• 1:55:32Speaker 04

  Yeah, spoiler alert, best movie ever made.

• 1:55:35Bill Simmons?

  We'll see you on Monday.

• 1:55:47Chris Ryan?

  At Zocdoc, we know you care about your health. You wouldn't do that early morning cardio if you didn't. So the fact that your annual physical is overdue just shows how hard it can be to get seen by a doctor. Sorry, that doctor's not in network. Press one for more options. You've reached us outside normal business hours. The next availability is in three months. But Zocdoc makes finding the right doctor easy. Download the app and search by specialty, insurance, and availability. Read real patient reviews, then book instantly. Zocdoc, ready to be seen?

• 1:56:17Speaker 07

  Wanna know you're on the best path to the right car? At CarMax, the price you see is the price you pay. No negotiating, no last minute surprises. Every car is CarMax certified and backed by a 10 day money back guarantee, so you can buy with confidence. Wanna shop from home? Go for it. You can come in when you're ready, take it for a spin, and buy however works for you. No pressure, no haggling, just the right car, your way. Visit carmax.com for details. Wanna drive? CarMax.