A 2026 Rewatchables Mailbag

Bill is joined by Chris Ryan and Craig Horlbeck to read listener submissions for new categories as we gear up for 2026 on The Rewatchables. Producers: Craig Horlbeck, Chia Hao Tat, and Eduardo Ocampo Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Bill Simmons?

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• 0:44Bill Simmons?

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• 1:27Bill Simmons?

  Get free shipping on your order, 365 day returns now available in Canada and the UK too. And when Quince asks where you heard about them, let them know it's a Rewatchables podcast. They would appreciate that. It's the best way to support the show.

• 1:45Bill Simmons?

  The Rewatchables, first one of 2026. Brought to you by The Ringer Podcast Network, where you can find the Fantasy Football Podcast with Craig Hornbeck.

• 1:52Chris Ryan?

  Yep, transitioning into the NFL Draft offseason show, but we're still going through the playoffs.

• 1:57Bill Simmons?

  Awkward. We're gonna talk on, you're coming on my pod, because we're gonna take something from my pod this week, too. We're gonna talk about playoff fantasy, because I have a wrinkle that I always mention and has never come on. CR?

• 2:07Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 2:08Bill Simmons?

  The Watch, Stranger Things finale?

• 2:10Chris Ryan?

  We did a little bit of that today, yeah. We did a little heated rivalry. We did a little bit of Landman, and we have a big month. The Pit, Industry, Night of the Seven Kingdoms, all coming this month.

• 2:21Bill Simmons?

  I saw DTF St. Louis.

• 2:24Chris Ryan?

  Okay.

• 2:26Bill Simmons?

  It's not out yet.

• 2:27Chris Ryan?

  The Bateman Show?

• 2:27Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I got a stealth, stealth viewing of that one. Landman was great.

• 2:33Chris Ryan?

  Landman.

• 2:34Bill Simmons?

  Heated Rivalry, my wife watched all six episodes, Saturday and Sunday, and was sobbing in the kitchen. I don't know what goes on in that show, but.

• 2:40Chris Ryan?

  It's, it's really good.

• 2:42Bill Simmons?

  You watched it?

• 2:43Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 2:44Bill Simmons?

  There's no season two, right?

• 2:45Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, there will be a season two.

• 2:46Bill Simmons?

  Oh, there will be a season two.

• 2:47Chris Ryan?

  Oh, yeah. There's a bunch of books. They're all based on a book series.

• 2:50Bill Simmons?

  Oh, great news, Craig. Heated Rivalry's coming back.

• 2:53Speaker 02

  Great. I did not watch it. I had to spend all my time watching the 12 hours of Stranger Things, but um, maybe I'll watch it.

• 2:59Bill Simmons?

  Okay. We're doing a mailbag. We did this at the beginning of last year. We did it at the beginning of this year as well. People sending questions to [email protected]. Uh, they sent a whole bunch of good stuff and it's coming up next.

• 3:25Bill Simmons?

  All right. These are actual questions from actual listeners. Gonna start with, it's not a mailbag question. It's more of a comment. It's from Jeff Wood. Has the concept of a movie being rewatchable actually aged the worst? With streaming and cord cutting, we have lost the ability to channel surf. I wonder how many movies I would have only watched one time if I had to go to a streaming service to watch and not catch it by accident. I know I'm not jumping in at the 32 minute mark, that's for sure. And then he says, looking forward to watching Eddie and the Cruisers with you guys, if it's ever on.

• 3:56Bill Simmons?

  I get this question a lot. I get it anecdotally. What is a, what does a rewatchable mean to somebody? You're, Craig, you're a good generation for this.

• 4:03Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 4:04Bill Simmons?

  Cause your generation doesn't channel surf as much as me and CRs did.

• 4:07Speaker 02

  Not at all. Channel surfing now is you go, it's too curated now. You can get anything you want. It used to be you went on cable or whatever, you're scrolling, oh, look, A Few Good Men is on. Now, you go to Netflix, you have 500 movies, 5,000 movies to choose from. So you never really stumble into anything anymore.

• 4:23Chris Ryan?

  I also think YouTube killed this a little bit because now you can just watch the last big action scene from Top Gun Maverick. Or the bridge scene in Sicario, or the, you know, border crossing scene in Sicario. And you're not like, ooh, it's on and I only have to wait 40 minutes for that to happen. So the instant gratification of YouTube really changed it.

• 4:49Chris Ryan?

  I would say that when I am with my wife, for instance, we tend to re-watch movies that we love because it's what we agree on. And I think that like when I'm solo, I'm like, I gotta watch something new. I gotta see something I've never seen before and keep building it out. But when, but when my wife and I are together, we'll be like, let's just put Scream on, you know, or let's just put Jurassic Park on because we might look at our phones, but like that's-

• 5:13Bill Simmons?

  But you're starting it from the beginning. And when we created re-watchables in 2017, part of the concept was you're channel surfing-

• 5:21Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 5:21Bill Simmons?

  And you come across this scene, you can't stop watching, or you see that it's coming on the cable-

• 5:25Chris Ryan?

  You're waiting for the TNT game to start. Oh, look what's on.

• 5:29Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, yeah, cuz this is the 10th year of the podcast, basically. In 2026, we started in 2017. I'm still gonna keep the premise, but I acknowledge that the jumping in during a movie thing is pretty hard now.

• 5:41Chris Ryan?

  I mean, what would changing the premise would be-

• 5:44Speaker 02

  The show's-

• 5:45Bill Simmons?

  Guys, new title.

• 5:46Chris Ryan?

  It's just watchables.

• 5:48Speaker 02

  Good movies.

• 5:49Bill Simmons?

  The, uh, I still have cable.

• 5:53Chris Ryan?

  Me too.

• 5:54Bill Simmons?

  Cuz we have, we have Spectrum for internet. They offered cable, kept it. I liked the cable guide. I got all the movies. I just charged it Spotify. Uh, don't tell them. It's research.

• 6:08Chris Ryan?

  It is.

• 6:08Bill Simmons?

  But I still like going to the cable guide and zooming through and being like-

• 6:12Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 6:13Bill Simmons?

  Like the other day, ironically, HBO had History of the World Part One on.

• 6:17Chris Ryan?

  Uh huh.

• 6:17Bill Simmons?

  A movie that I don't think has been on cable for like 10 years. I was like, oh! And watched the second half of that. And I don't, I don't even think I would have known it was on HBO Max.

• 6:26Speaker 02

  Do you not get the same feeling scrolling through Netflix and seeing what movies they have? Does that not feel the same as scrolling through cable?

• 6:32Bill Simmons?

  It feels 90% the same. The difference is when we were scrolling through and saw History of the World, it was right when they were getting to France-

• 6:39Chris Ryan?

  Right.

• 6:39Bill Simmons?

  In the last like 30 minutes of the movie. And I was like, oh my, I gotta watch this.

• 6:43Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 6:43Bill Simmons?

  That feeling's gone.

• 6:44Chris Ryan?

  I will say, oh no, you go ahead.

• 6:45Speaker 02

  I also just think the comfort watch has transitioned from I'm gonna put on an old movie I love to I'm gonna put on an old TV show I love. I think it's now because it's so easy to just like throw on The Office, that that is kind of the go-to, I got, I got two hours to kill, I'm gonna watch Friends or The Office.

• 7:00Chris Ryan?

  I will say that-

• 7:01Bill Simmons?

  I'm there too. I'm, maybe I'm both with TV and movies.

• 7:04Chris Ryan?

  When you were doing your big list-

• 7:05Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 7:05Chris Ryan?

  The 50 re-watchables of the 21st century.

• 7:08Bill Simmons?

  What an honor for you to be in the room for that, by the way.

• 7:10Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, in our no prep era here again.

• 7:13Bill Simmons?

  Blind, blind pod.

• 7:14Chris Ryan?

  I will say- Do you feel like the last, like, because cable channels now, I think, are playing more movies from the last, like, 10 years, say?

• 7:23Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 7:24Chris Ryan?

  And those movies tend to be, whether it's Avengers, or a Gerard Butler action movie, or whatever, like, we're, we're basically out of the era where you can randomly catch the firm.

• 7:35Chris Ryan?

  And I think that that has sort of changed a little bit of my relationship to channel surfing to re-watch stuff, is because we've now moved into this, like-

• 7:42Bill Simmons?

  It's just Winter Soldier now?

• 7:44Chris Ryan?

  Batman versus Superman is, is on HBO most of the day, you know?

• 7:48Bill Simmons?

  Well, that's one of the things that got me sucked into number 16, Limitless. Iconic. Right as he's about to, right as he sees the pills are in the refrigerator and is taking them, it's like, alright, this is a fun 20 minutes. It's one of the last ones of its era. Alright. Brian in Albany- So we're not changing the name of the show, just to be clear? No, we're fine. Brian in Albany, he says, "Bill often jokes about certain films being great airplane movies."

• 8:16Bill Simmons?

  Limitless, ironically, taken. Sure. There's so, so, any rom-com, there's certain airplane, you, you have it on, you don't really want to concentrate, it's people getting up, moving around, but it's, it's like, you kind of turn your brain half off. Like B-tier action movies? Yeah. Yeah. So he said, "I think that idea should be its own category. You pick the ideal setting and audience to watch the film with." I love this. Okay. He said, "Possible options: First Date, When Harry Met Sally, Significant Other, Fatal Attraction, Kids, Toy Story, In-Laws, The Fugitive," which I think is really smart. Like, you're hanging out with your in-laws, what are we gonna watch? Fugitive, there's no real sex, there's action. Buddy movie, Terminator 2.

• 9:00Bill Simmons?

  Airplane movie, Draft Day, Limitless, ironically, he put in there. Theater, Jaws, The Sounds of the Lambs. And then he had solo hardcore 8mm, 8mm Princes, AKA The CR Special. This guy's in Albany? Yeah. Him solo watching 8mm? I love The CR Special. Yeah. Species, that's a solo watch. Right. Well, he said, "The category name suggestion could be the Watch Party Award." Oh. I like this. So near, at the, maybe at the top, right before we go into re-watchable categories, like, alright, Watch Party, ideal setting for this. And you kind of pick what it is.

• 9:37Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, kind of like after what's the ideal age to watch it? It's like, what's the ideal venue?

• 9:41Bill Simmons?

  I think this is better than ideal age, right?

• 9:43Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 9:44Bill Simmons?

  Like, This Is the End is a buddy movie.

• 9:46Chris Ryan?

  For sure.

• 9:46Bill Simmons?

  That's like, my buddies are in town, we're gonna watch This Is the End. I had a couple other ideas for categories, though. Five o'clocker, my dad's

• 9:53Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 9:53Bill Simmons?

  thing for movies that weren't quite good enough to watch at night, but good enough when he used to come home from work and he would stop at this movie theater at five o'clock and it would always be like some sort of crappy action movie. The buddies in town, this is the end. Proxy vacation is a big one, where you get to go to Hawaii or Alaska or Vancouver, a place you both want to go, let's just go.

• 10:13Chris Ryan?

  Paris?

• 10:14Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, Paris. That worst product.

• 10:17Chris Ryan?

  Japan for lots of translation.

• 10:19Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Ladies only, the holiday? Like, we're just out. My wife's like, my friends here, we're just, the holiday was out, we're just watching. All right, I'm gonna leave. Scary movie. And then I added peanut gallery.

• 10:34Chris Ryan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 10:34Bill Simmons?

  Movies like regarding Henry.

• 10:35Chris Ryan?

  Oh, where you're yelling at the screen.

• 10:38Bill Simmons?

  You're just making fun of it the entire movie. Like, I can't believe they did this.

• 10:41Speaker 02

  I do think that adds to the experience. Like, I watched all of Stranger Things this break, but I watched it with like five people and it was way more fun that way. We're all kind of making jokes, throwing out.

• 10:49Chris Ryan?

  That's my wife and I were doing that, yeah.

• 10:50Speaker 02

  It's so much better that way.

• 10:52Bill Simmons?

  See, I tried to do that with my kids and they're like, shut up, dad! Shut up! They thought they were watching.

• 10:56Speaker 02

  You don't understand, Vecna's bridging the upside down.

• 10:59Bill Simmons?

  They thought they were at like a Godfather one screening in 1972.

• 11:02Speaker 02

  Vecna's just a soldier now.

• 11:04Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 11:04Speaker 02

  For some reason.

• 11:05Bill Simmons?

  All right, I like that one. We're gonna add watch party.

• 11:07Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 11:08Bill Simmons?

  Patrick Craig writes in, hey, I'm a big fan of the show. I just finished the new Mailbag episodes. This is from a long time ago. All these questions are from the last 12 months. I wanted to confirm that Monsters Ball is the worst movie to see with your parents. I saw it in the theater with my mom when it came out 23 plus years ago. I'm still scarred to this day. And we went because we both saw Raj's four star review in the local newspaper. Trying to think, is that the, is that the worst?

• 11:34Speaker 02

  Is that the Howie Berry movie?

• 11:35Bill Simmons?

  Requiem for a Dream? Yeah. That was when she's, she loses her son and then she has sex with Billy Bob. They had like this crazy sex scene.

• 11:42Speaker 02

  Right.

• 11:43Bill Simmons?

  She's like, make me feel good, make me feel good! And she's fucking bummed.

• 11:46Speaker 02

  I think I've seen that in a clip somewhere, but I haven't seen that film.

• 11:49Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 11:49Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, this was not one you'd want to see with the in-laws.

• 11:53Chris Ryan?

  You know, there's some movies that are inappropriate to watch with your parents, but if you're young enough, like, they can be like, "Don't worry about that part." I always think about the Miggs scene in Silence of the Lambs.

• 12:03Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 12:03Chris Ryan?

  And how long it took me before I realized what Miggs was throwing.

• 12:09Bill Simmons?

  It was just the slider?

• 12:10Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, it was just like a long 10 years of like, "Yeah, he just sneezed."

• 12:16Speaker 02

  I mean, over the break, we were debating watching one battle after another with my in-laws. And then I was like, "Ah, Sean Penn in the first 10 minutes of this movie."

• 12:22Bill Simmons?

  Right, boners.

• 12:23Speaker 02

  Kind of gets a no-hand boner. So, I don't think you can do it.

• 12:27Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, Craig's a good litmus test for this, because he still hangs out with the in-laws from time to time.

• 12:31Speaker 02

  Yeah, like, what movies would I watch with Liz's parents is a big factor in what we put on the Saturday.

• 12:35Chris Ryan?

  I mean, The Fugitive is perfect. Apollo 13 is perfect.

• 12:38Bill Simmons?

  I'm gonna say rated R probably out across the board if you're with in-laws or the girlfriend's parents.

• 12:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, like, Holdovers was a huge hit.

• 12:46Bill Simmons?

  It's a good one.

• 12:47Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 12:47Chris Ryan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 12:50Bill Simmons?

  Chaz Summers from Orlando, Florida. Chaz with an S.

• 12:54Chris Ryan?

  You're fully doxing these guys. Brian in Albany is on a watch list now.

• 12:58Speaker 02

  What's their email?

• 12:59Bill Simmons?

  He says, "Tell Bill Proof of Life is from 2000, so Zodiac can replace it in the top 50." This is for my rewatchables list. It actually worked out perfectly. I accidentally, somehow Zodiac got cut out, and it was in the 30s. And I was moving stuff around. I don't know how that happened. But then I did Proof of Life, which wasn't from 2001 and on.

• 13:18Speaker 02

  Right.

• 13:18Bill Simmons?

  I thought it was 2002. I just, I fucked up.

• 13:21Speaker 02

  So, are you allowing?

• 13:22Bill Simmons?

  Zodiac just goes into the Proof of Life spot.

• 13:24Chris Ryan?

  You're taking Proof of Life out?

• 13:26Bill Simmons?

  I think it's out. It was from the wrong era.

• 13:29Speaker 02

  So, we're not including 2000's movies, but you're including Zodiac?

• 13:32Bill Simmons?

  Well, I accidentally left off Zodiac, which I was supposed to be in there. So, I think it's just a natural fix.

• 13:38Chris Ryan?

  Okay.

• 13:39Bill Simmons?

  For the official list, when it's on, like, basketballreference.com or over at Lance.

• 13:44Chris Ryan?

  Rewatchablesreference.com.

• 13:45Bill Simmons?

  Rewatchablemoviesreference.com.

• 13:47Speaker 02

  But Black Hat stays.

• 13:48Bill Simmons?

  Black Hat stays.

• 13:49Chris Ryan?

  Why would there be any second guessing about that?

• 13:52Speaker 02

  Just wanted to throw that out there.

• 13:53Bill Simmons?

  Thanks for sticking up for me, Sarah. Casey Morgan writes in, "I was listening to the Can't Hardly Wait rewatchables. Joanna Robinson came up with a category, would a cellphone ruin this movie? You should expand it to what technology ruins this movie? For example, an out of time, a movie we have not done yet, but I know. Yeah.

• 14:15Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 14:16Bill Simmons?

  You know, out of time?

• 14:17Chris Ryan?

  No.

• 14:17Bill Simmons?

  Denzel?

• 14:18Chris Ryan?

  We've been, we've been following out of time since the combine.

• 14:21Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:23Chris Ryan?

  Great measurable.

• 14:24Speaker 02

  Incredible forty times.

• 14:25Bill Simmons?

  Since the eighth grade AU tournament. He said in out of time, if Dean Cain had a ring camera, he would have known Denzel was hooking up with this lady. The ring camera probably ruins just as many cellphone movies.

• 14:39Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 14:39Bill Simmons?

  Should this be a category? I like it. I think it should at least be test driven. I don't know if it moves into the main, but maybe it goes into the flex. But I had a, I had a couple of ideas for this. The Sarah Connor, if we wanted, like, it needs a name. It can't just be with technology ruin the movies. The Sarah Connor Award for does technology ruin this movie? She's a cellphone, they're getting ahold of her right away.

• 15:00Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, I mean, I think cellphone, Die Hard is a big one where cellphones would come, come into play. For me, when I, I was thinking about, uh, The Firm is the last movie right before like file sharing or file transfers become digital.

• 15:16Bill Simmons?

  Oh, like Dropbox?

• 15:17Chris Ryan?

  Entirely hinges on fax machines.

• 15:20Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 15:21Chris Ryan?

  And if you just had email, like, is The Firm basically like, yeah, that's, we're all good. You said, you said email, like.

• 15:27Bill Simmons?

  Movie's over.

• 15:29Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, movie's over.

• 15:30Bill Simmons?

  He's not getting chased.

• 15:31Chris Ryan?

  A lot of movies where there's any wire fraud or, you know, across state lines transfer. And any movie where someone's like, here is a letter that explains everything that will be sent to the press in the event of my death.

• 15:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, pre-internet crime changes a lot.

• 15:46Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 15:46Speaker 02

  I mean, even Home Alone, like, if he had a phone, like, everything would have probably been fine.

• 15:51Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, and they would have had him on Life 360.

• 15:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, he would have known of nothing.

• 15:54Bill Simmons?

  I had two more for this, uh, cause I, I wanna figure out who to name it after, cause I like it. It would be funny to name it after Denzel in out of time, a movie that ends fairly soon. But, uh, Sarah Connor's good. The Reggie Hammond Award, we don't have a Forty Eight Hours, my favorite movie. You can see. Was it? Where'd it go? Oh, it fell underneath. It's behind Craig.

• 16:17Bill Simmons?

  Forty-eight hours. Reggie Hammond's just gone for 12 hours in that movie when they get separated. Yes. And then it turns out he's at the nightclub. He's like, I know you don't know about this. It's a popular place with the brothers. And he's talking to Jack Hates. He's at Bromans. But Jack can't get ahold of him for 12 hours. Cause they don't have cell phones. Now if they have cell phones, he'd be like, where are you, motherfucker? Yeah.

• 16:38Speaker 02

  Do you think they could have found Jaws? Like, would Jaws just have been tagged in like drone stock in 20 minutes?

• 16:42Chris Ryan?

  I mean, any serial killer movie, probably. It's like all that stuff where it's like, this man, he wants something that he can't have. And it's like, no, he has DNA. We would just find it, you know?

• 16:52Bill Simmons?

  The other one I thought would be good for this is the end of Good Will Hunting. Affleck sets the scene up when they're having construction. They're doing construction. And he's like, you know what the best part of my day is? Every day I walk and I go to pick you up and I'm hoping you're not there. And he, and so he sets it up for later when he goes to pick him up and Will's not there. And he looks through the window and then he does that Ben Affleck.

• 17:16Bill Simmons?

  Does, really goes for the supporting actor award. Now he'd just be on a cell, like that scene would just be him on a cell. Yo, where are you? Yeah. And it's completely ruined. You'd check his location.

• 17:25Chris Ryan?

  Will's just like, I gotta go see about a girl.

• 17:27Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. So who, who is this named after? Is it Sarah Connor? Is that the most obvious one? It's a good one. We don't have Sarah Connor in our award. Okay. Matt Katz has a new category. This is good. It ties in earlier. The Replacements Cheerleader Tryout Award for most awkward scene to be playing when someone else walks in the room. So it's just a normal movie you're watching, but they walk in during the precise worst scene that ever could have happened. And he explains, I was watching that scene. My wife walked in without context. It's completely ridiculous. Terrible acting by the strippers. Sudden random 90 music. My wife looked confused, then backed away and slowly exited.

• 18:03Speaker 02

  We could also call this the, um, the, the, cause I did this. The Poor Things worst movie to watch on a plane award?

• 18:10Bill Simmons?

  Oh, yeah.

• 18:10Speaker 02

  I watched Poor Things on a plane. I kinda knew what I was getting into, but not, not fully. Every single scene of Poor Things is probably the worst time to walk into it. But this is a great category.

• 18:19Bill Simmons?

  He also suggested the domestic abuse scene in The Godfather where Will Hunting on the couch pretending he was molested. I was thinking, oh, bah, goo, you! And somebody just walks into that. Like, what are you watching? But I, I wanted to name this one. Maybe it sticks with replacement cheerleaders, but I, I wanted. The He Got Game Hooker Award.

• 18:41Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 18:41Bill Simmons?

  He Got Game is just going great.

• 18:43Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 18:43Bill Simmons?

  And then there's the five-minute crazy hooker scene.

• 18:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 18:46Chris Ryan?

  So you're talking about more of like an incongruous, like...

• 18:50Bill Simmons?

  You're soloing.

• 18:51Chris Ryan?

  Right, but like the scene, it shouldn't be like, oh, somebody walks in right at the car accident in Hereditary.

• 18:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, is it, this, this scene is not representative of the...

• 18:58Bill Simmons?

  That's a good one, too.

• 18:59Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 18:59Speaker 02

  So it's not just inappropriate.

• 19:00Bill Simmons?

  But the car accident in Hereditary is appropriate for the movie.

• 19:02Chris Ryan?

  That's what I'm saying. And also, if somebody walks in and they're like, oh, my God, is the car accident about to happen? Then you know you've found your life partner.

• 19:09Speaker 02

  Right.

• 19:09Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 19:11Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, so I think it's like the He Got Game Hooker scene kind of level thing. I don't know, maybe, maybe we get some ideas from, from the listeners for that, but, um, how about the Replacements Cheerleader tryouts? Pretty good.

• 19:23Bill Simmons?

  Anyway, good idea. Daniel writes in, "I reread your original Miami Vice review for Page Two." I actually went up and looked at this after he wrote it. I wrote, I did a summer movie article for Page Two in 2006. I wrote about like five movies. "You gave it a C+ and called it a sleek, humorless, dreary cop movie with no real connection to the TV show." "You also wrote that Jamie Foxx has no chemistry with Colin Farrell at all, to the point that every time Fox looks at him, you could almost see him thinking, wow, I can't believe the guy made it to the set today. The last time I saw him, it was 5:00 AM and he was shotgunning a bottle of Bushmills and starting to blow off one of the extras. What a waste of Jamie..." This is still me writing.

• 20:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:05Bill Simmons?

  "What a waste of Jamie Foxx. It's unbelievable." Then he says, "Now, you love this movie. I'm not even making fun of you for this. Just curious, have you ever had a bigger flip-flop on a movie?" We talked about this when we did the pod.

• 20:17Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 20:18Bill Simmons?

  "I didn't like it for eight years."

• 20:19Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, you're not running for Congress. You're allowed to change your mind about this, you know?

• 20:23Bill Simmons?

  Well, it did make me think like, movies, they're not quite flip-flops. They're more movies that just needed to be...

• 20:28Chris Ryan?

  They evolve.

• 20:29Bill Simmons?

  They need to be in the oven for a while. Because Limitless was like this for me, too.

• 20:32Chris Ryan?

  Sure.

• 20:32Bill Simmons?

  I thought Limitless was fine, and then about five years later, I'm like, oh, Limitless. But Miami Vice is number one for me.

• 20:39Speaker 02

  That goes back to you talking about how we don't re-watch movies anymore. Now, it's kind of just your first impression of the movie is kind of your only impression of the movie, because you're not just flipping through cable and you're like, oh, Limitless, I'll give that another shot. You don't really do that anymore.

• 20:50Bill Simmons?

  No.

• 20:50Speaker 02

  So it's tough. Should, this could be a whole month on the re-watchables, movies that I, that I didn't like at first.

• 20:55Bill Simmons?

  Movies that stayed in the oven for me. I had three more for me.

• 21:00Bill Simmons?

  Black Cat.

• 21:02Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 21:02Bill Simmons?

  Black Cat, we've made the case.

• 21:04Chris Ryan?

  We saw it in the theater and we were like, man, I don't know about that one, you know? And then I think over like multiple viewings, it's really emerged.

• 21:13Bill Simmons?

  This was the case we made to Sean. It's not your fault. It's Black Cat's fault.

• 21:18Chris Ryan?

  Sure.

• 21:18Bill Simmons?

  Because you just need to watch it four times to fully figure out what happened.

• 21:21Chris Ryan?

  The first time we saw it, I don't know if we understood like more than 30% of the dialogue.

• 21:26Bill Simmons?

  No, I didn't understand it till my fifth viewing. I also had Miami Vice Black Cat. This is the end. I liked it the first time, but like the third time it was really when it kicked in.

• 21:37Bill Simmons?

  And then the other one, we haven't done the rewatchables, but it's on the list is Public Enemies.

• 21:42Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 21:43Bill Simmons?

  And I don't know why I didn't like it that much the first time I saw it, but I think that movie's really good.

• 21:46Chris Ryan?

  It's not dissimilar to Black Cat in that there's a little bit of like a what, what it? Cause they're both kind of mumbling throughout the movie. So there's a lot of like, wait, what did he say? Stuff going on. I just, it's also when you first see Public Enemies, you're like, the music is pretty like jarring because it's pretty, it's pretty rock for a 1930s movie.

• 22:06Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 22:06Chris Ryan?

  But yeah, it's definitely.

• 22:07Bill Simmons?

  So what's your number one movie you changed your mind on over the years?

• 22:10Speaker 02

  Uh, the movie, The Nice Guys went from like, that was all right to now one of my favorite movies.

• 22:15Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, that's a really good one.

• 22:16Speaker 02

  Fully agree. Yeah.

• 22:18Bill Simmons?

  Both guys movies, cause I feel that way about the other guys too.

• 22:21Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 22:21Bill Simmons?

  The other guys, I was like, eh, it's fine.

• 22:23Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 22:23Bill Simmons?

  And now I think it's really good and I actively seek it out.

• 22:27Speaker 02

  There's a lot, there's a lot of comedies now that because there, there's been such a dry spell of comedies. I now go back to movies like Neighbors. I'm like, I like Neighbors a lot more now, actually.

• 22:37Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Funny People was another one for me where I was disappointed by the last 40 minutes. We talked about it in the top 50.

• 22:42Speaker 02

  Even Booksmart, I go back and I'm like, you know what? Booksmart was pretty good. I like Booksmart.

• 22:46Chris Ryan?

  I'm trying to think of one that's like a little bit more underrated, but.

• 22:52Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, I mean, Nice Guys is a perfect example of a movie that I was really hyped for, felt a little let down by when I first saw, and now has become one of my favorite movies of the of the last 25 years.

• 23:02Bill Simmons?

  I almost wrote down Black Rain for this, but then I kind of went back into my brain when I first saw Black Rain. I was like, no, no, I actually thought that was fucking awesome.

• 23:10Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 23:10Bill Simmons?

  I saw Black Rain. Amy Garcia's head got chopped off by a machete by a guy on a motorcycle. Spoiler. He got beheaded. It's a 45 minute work. That movie's amazing.

• 23:22Bill Simmons?

  All right. Next one's from David Snow. The endings of movies are often, this one, by the way, buckle up for this one.

• 23:29Chris Ryan?

  Oh, I have one, the one, Shutter Island. Shutter Island is a movie, the first time I saw it, I was like, that was cool, but kind of dreary. And it's way better, A, when you know the twist, and B, when you're like, I'm fucking going to Shutter Island.

• 23:44Speaker 02

  I've never seen it, and the reason why is because somebody spoiled it for me, and I was like, I don't, how good can it be if you know the twist?

• 23:50Chris Ryan?

  It's awesome.

• 23:52Bill Simmons?

  What was the best movie you ever spoiled for anybody?

• 23:55Chris Ryan?

  I spoiled something, what did I spoil for Maze in a blog post by accident?

• 24:00Bill Simmons?

  Oh.

• 24:01Chris Ryan?

  Oh, Cabin in the Woods. I like, I like spoiled Cabin in the Woods for all Grantland readers who hadn't seen it.

• 24:08Bill Simmons?

  Wow. Do you have a good spoiler?

• 24:10Speaker 02

  A college professor spoiled The Sixth Sense for me, which fucking sucked.

• 24:15Bill Simmons?

  That's a really tough one.

• 24:17Speaker 02

  And since then, I've always kind of tried my best. It's, also, that's another problem now. It, if a movie came out 10, 15, 20 years ago, there is no way anybody could go into it now for the first time without knowing a major spoiler.

• 24:29Chris Ryan?

  Half the articles on the internet right now are, we need to talk about the ending of a movie that is playing in two cities.

• 24:36Bill Simmons?

  Um, I saw the last minute of Eddie and the Cruisers accidentally before I saw the movie, so I always knew what the ending was.

• 24:43Chris Ryan?

  Right.

• 24:44Bill Simmons?

  Um, but my best spoiler ever was, I've told this story, but Jacko, my buddy Jacko, my college roommate.

• 24:49Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 24:50Bill Simmons?

  We were, I think it was like New Year's Eve, 1995, and he was giving me shit. He was pissing me off, and I got mad. I was like, Kaiser Soze is Kevin Spacey. And he was like, what? What the fuck? And I just completely ruined the movie for him. I forget what he said. I think he made fun of the Red Sox. It was something mean spirited.

• 25:09Speaker 02

  Also, things get mean so quickly now. Like, if you don't see a movie in the first two weeks, like, you know half the things that happened.

• 25:14Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, that is true. David Snell writes in, "This is a buckle upper. The endings of movies are often pretty lazy, cliched. In Heat, Pacino should die and De Niro should live." Just throws that out.

• 25:28Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 25:29Bill Simmons?

  "Then it's a 10 out of 10 movie. In True Romance, Clarence should die. Then it's a 10 out of 10."

• 25:34Speaker 02

  Well.

• 25:35Bill Simmons?

  "In Shawshank Redemption, it should end with Red under the tree. Then it's a 10 out of 10, not a nine out of five, 9.5. Movie producers and test audiences have too much influence."

• 25:47Bill Simmons?

  Pacino should die and De Niro should live. Did we ever really go down this rabbit hole?

• 25:53Chris Ryan?

  I mean, I think that De Niro dies because he doesn't adhere to his own code, right? Like, he lets his emotions get the better of him, goes back for Wayne Grove, is concerned about getting Edie out of town, and that's why he fails, whereas Pacino, you know, saves Natalie Portman, but still is hunting for De Niro.

• 26:16Bill Simmons?

  I think you could argue, if you flip it, Pacino dies because he couldn't give up the rush of chasing after guys like Neil. Neil gets away, but he loses this one thing that would have been the love of his life, and now he's back to, his whole life is just about the Heat being around the corner.

• 26:34Chris Ryan?

  Right.

• 26:34Bill Simmons?

  Same thing. They should have done an alternate ending, just to fuck with us. Just put it on YouTube 15 years later.

• 26:41Speaker 02

  But is the complaint that, like, narratively, this was wrong for the movie, or is this guy just bummed that De Niro dies because he's cool?

• 26:47Bill Simmons?

  Well, I think that, but that's why this is kind of stupid. What's not stupid is Clarence dying in True Romance, I think.

• 26:54Chris Ryan?

  Well, that was a script, right?

• 26:55Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. And I think they changed it because, I can't remember the reason, we covered this when we did the pod, like, eight years ago.

• 27:02Chris Ryan?

  I think that they were, it was just Tony Scott was like, "We gotta give people a happy ending here. It's not Reservoir Dogs."

• 27:08Bill Simmons?

  The Shawshank Redemption is ridiculous.

• 27:11Chris Ryan?

  So is this-

• 27:11Bill Simmons?

  I'm completely outraged that anyone thinks that should end with red under the tree.

• 27:15Chris Ryan?

  I think it's an interesting question with the wrong examples. It's an interesting question about-

• 27:19Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 27:19Chris Ryan?

  Movies that are almost perfect or really, really great that get knocked down a spot or two-

• 27:25Bill Simmons?

  Because they took the easy way out with the ending.

• 27:26Chris Ryan?

  Or because the, this happens a lot with horror and sci-fi where it asks a bunch of questions for the 75% of the movie. When it has to answer them, it kind of flails around a little bit. Like, a really good example of this is this Danny Boyle movie, Sunshine, uh, which has like three or four of the best scenes of any sci-fi movie you'll see outside of 2001. And then an ending that makes no sense and is basically like a slasher.

• 27:50Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's just like, does it stick the landing? It's really hard for horror. Or it's like the movie, the show Lost, it's like you can ask all these amazing questions, then it's like, can you really answer all of them?

• 27:58Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 27:58Speaker 02

  Like, I'm not a horror guy, but one of my favorite movies growing up, and I watched it a ton of times, is Signs. The ending of Signs, you know, they're allergic to water, is kind of one of the biggest letdowns, I think.

• 28:09Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 28:10Speaker 02

  So, maybe that's the category, is like, fumbled it at the one-yard line.

• 28:14Chris Ryan?

  There's also with the big franchise movies now, they end five times. So like, the last movie of a trilogy or a franchise, like, you know, I mean, Return of the King's a good, great movie, but Return of the King ends for like 40 minutes.

• 28:26Speaker 02

  It does.

• 28:27Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 28:27Chris Ryan?

  Uh, Dark Knight Rises, I feel like, has a bunch of endings, kind of.

• 28:32Speaker 02

  I just watched Lord of the Rings for the first time this break.

• 28:34Chris Ryan?

  Did you really?

• 28:34Speaker 02

  All three of them.

• 28:35Chris Ryan?

  Did you like them?

• 28:35Speaker 02

  I did.

• 28:36Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, they're pretty good.

• 28:38Speaker 02

  Have you seen them?

• 28:38Chris Ryan?

  No.

• 28:41Speaker 02

  Fun, watch them on your flight to Japan.

• 28:43Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 28:44Bill Simmons?

  I'll get on it. Uh, I wrote down that this could be the let JP win the final F1 race award, because we just talked about that.

• 28:50Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 28:51Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Um, it could be called the Clarence Worley should have died award, or it could have been called the Liam Neeson's daughter should have just become a Saudi Arabian heroin whore award for taking. Like, he just never finds her. She's passed out for the next 10 years.

• 29:06Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 29:06Speaker 02

  She wasn't even captured by the Saudis.

• 29:08Bill Simmons?

  Whatever it was.

• 29:09Speaker 02

  Saudi Arabian heroin whore.

• 29:13Bill Simmons?

  I like the Clarence Worley Award, though.

• 29:14Chris Ryan?

  Sure.

• 29:15Bill Simmons?

  Because I think that's a really good topic about whether he should have died or not. So, I don't know. I'll put it in the flex. We're gonna take a break and then we'll do the next batch. This episode is brought to you by Trivia. Sweeteners are like movies. The best ones don't leave an aftertaste. That's why Trivia Allos Plus Stevia Sweetener and Monk Fruit Sweetener is a smooth, balanced tri-blend that delivers sugar-like sweetness with zero calories per serving and no aftertaste. If you're looking for a better way to enjoy sweetness with zero calories per serving, you really need to try Trivia Allos Plus Stevia Sweetener and Monk Fruit Sweetener. Available online and nationwide at Kroger, Target, and your favorite local grocery retailer.

• 29:59Bill Simmons?

  This episode is brought to you by Searchlight Pictures Wild Horse 9. John Malkovich and Sam Rockwell, I like those guys, star in the sharp-witted comedy thriller from Academy Award winner Martin McDonagh. Writer-director of The Banshees of Inisherin and Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri. Set in the 1970s, filmed on location on Easter Island, Malkovich and Rockwell play CIA agents Chris and Lee, who are caught in a dangerous game of secrets and survival. Also starring Steve Buscemi, another one of my guys. Parker Posey and Tom Waits. Wild Horse 9 is being hailed by critics as a revitalizing shot of pure entertainment and easily one of the best films of the year.

• 30:40Bill Simmons?

  Don't miss Wild Horse 9, only in theaters November 6th. Get tickets now. All right, next email is from Beau in San Francisco, spells it B-O. Some people do the B-A-U.

• 30:53Chris Ryan?

  The French spelling.

• 30:55Bill Simmons?

  Other people just go B-O. I don't know. What would you do? If you had a son named Beau, would you go the B-O or would you do the B-E?

• 31:01Speaker 02

  I think I'd probably go B-O, even though B-E-A-U is definitely fancier.

• 31:04Bill Simmons?

  No, wait. Beau Horlback's a strong name.

• 31:07Speaker 02

  Beau Horlback? He goes Boho. I don't know if that plays.

• 31:09Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, that's probably not good.

• 31:10Chris Ryan?

  Uh, Bo Jackson, Bo Nix.

• 31:12Speaker 02

  Yeah, B-O. That was nice.

• 31:14Bill Simmons?

  Anyway, Beau says, "Was rejamming the Saving Private Ryan episode earlier." I guess that was the rewatchable we did. Rejamming.

• 31:22Speaker 02

  Was rejamming it.

• 31:23Bill Simmons?

  I don't know.

• 31:24Speaker 02

  I don't know. The rejamables.

• 31:27Bill Simmons?

  He wanted to throw out a suggestion for a subcategory. The Earn This Award for Awkward Movie Quote That Should Have Been Vetted by William Goldman First. So just like a really bad quote from a movie that we're like, ah. Somebody, the producers needed to step in. I don't mind it. I was thinking, way to go, Paula. Way to go. That would have been a good Earn This Award, but I couldn't think of any other ones of just terrible quotes of movies. Anyway, keep moving. Mitch Schaub, he suggests the, was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor award for when Bill messes up a name or a quote, but everyone is just like, forget it, he's on a roll. That's pretty good.

• 32:11Chris Ryan?

  Did you say the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?

• 32:14Bill Simmons?

  Well, that's Belushi says that. Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?

• 32:19Chris Ryan?

  That's good.

• 32:20Bill Simmons?

  That's pretty good. Really weird email from Chris L. He said, y'all need to do a Demolition Man episode. It was a TBS TNT staple growing up. I probably watched it way too young. In first grade, my teacher was obsessed with penguins. Everyone in our class had to create their own penguin alter ego for the year.

• 32:36Chris Ryan?

  What?

• 32:36Bill Simmons?

  I went with a rock hopper penguin dressed as Simon Phoenix. Simon has bleached blonde hair, rock hoppers have yellow feathers.

• 32:43Chris Ryan?

  I don't know anything that's going on right now.

• 32:44Bill Simmons?

  I was proud of this thing, walked to the front of the class, presented it and got absolutely nothing. No laughs, no nods, no recognition. Just a room full of blank six-year-old stares. At the time, I was crushed. Don't crush me a second time. Put Demolition Man on the schedule.

• 32:58Chris Ryan?

  That seemed more like he wanted to tell that story and then put Demolition Man and request in there.

• 33:03Bill Simmons?

  So you think Chris L. made it up?

• 33:04Chris Ryan?

  No, I mean, that sounds pretty specific. I don't know how you make that up.

• 33:07Bill Simmons?

  Watch Demolition Man. I've never seen it. I mean, I did show my son Halloween when he was like five, but maybe I won't judge here. But anyway, Demolition Man has kind of been in the mix.

• 33:18Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, I think it's, you're going to make your way through the Sylvester Stallone filmography.

• 33:22Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I was thinking it's, at some point, you got to pad Stallone's stats a little bit, like the Rams padded Matt Stafford yesterday. It's like, he needs two more touchdowns. I know we're on the one yard line, but maybe we could run a complicated.

• 33:32Chris Ryan?

  Do you or don't care about the NFL MVP award?

• 33:34Bill Simmons?

  I just think it's, it's now become a logic test.

• 33:37Chris Ryan?

  So you think putting up stats against easy opponents should not be counted towards an MVP?

• 33:41Bill Simmons?

  I just think they were chasing the MVP. That's right. Playing three-win Arizona. This is a great one. It's from Zach. He left no other information. It's just Z A C H.

• 33:51Chris Ryan?

  You're safe.

• 33:52Bill Simmons?

  Probably Zach Love. Category idea, best hang, worst hang. Pick a category from the movie who would be best hang and worst hang, or best hang or worst hang. For example, hereditary. Charlie would probably be a pretty bad hang.

• 34:06Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 34:07Bill Simmons?

  Making that clicky noise with their tongue constantly, decorated roadkill where you're trying to watch the game. Dietary restrictions and negligence means you're probably running to the hospital after she takes a handful of peanuts while watching a Nuggets game.

• 34:19Chris Ryan?

  A Nuggets game?

• 34:21Bill Simmons?

  Payman, the king of hell.

• 34:22Chris Ryan?

  I'm just trying to watch Aaron Gordon, goddammit.

• 34:25Bill Simmons?

  Jesus, you're overdosing again. Payman, the king of hell, would be a good hang. Would have some surefire betting tips, some cool stories about people down in hell. And he wears the crown.

• 34:35Chris Ryan?

  Okay, so we have to nominate best hang and worst hang of every movie. I like that. That's good.

• 34:39Bill Simmons?

  I think it could be a flex if there was a movie in the big.

• 34:42Chris Ryan?

  Payman, huge Avalanche fan. Loves that.

• 34:45Bill Simmons?

  Loves when guys mix it up. I don't mind best hang, worst hang.

• 34:49Chris Ryan?

  No, it's good.

• 34:50Bill Simmons?

  I think that could go in the flex at least.

• 34:51Chris Ryan?

  Sure.

• 34:53Bill Simmons?

  This is great. Chris T. said, new category. If this film had an after-credit scene like the MCU, what would it be? You'd need to start off with at least a suggestion of Heat's after-credit scene. Thank you for the years of entertainment. So I wrote some stuff down for Heat, and then you feel free to add. Vincent Hanna was divorced three more times and died after his nasal cavity caved in from too much cocaine. That was one.

• 35:18Chris Ryan?

  Oh, wait. So you're doing like the title card, like the written text of what, okay.

• 35:22Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Edie used Neil's money to launch ApeBooks.com. Edie.

• 35:27Chris Ryan?

  Oh, yeah. Okay.

• 35:29Bill Simmons?

  Chris was murdered by gamblers after losing a Vikings tease in the Gary Anderson game in 1998. And then Kelso became a billionaire when he created Reddit.

• 35:38Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 35:38Bill Simmons?

  Because it's all out there. It's all out there. Just gotta grab it. But I would totally have watched a Heat after credits.

• 35:43Chris Ryan?

  Yeah. I mean, the typical MCU one, it's either teasing a sequel, or it's some sort of like lighthearted, like we're all just eating after like this crazy moment. It's basically what happens the next day, but as a scene. Or, or like, I would like to see John McClane and Holly McClane instantly start fighting like five minutes after he saved her life.

• 36:02Bill Simmons?

  So that would be the MCU after credits, just an extra scene?

• 36:04Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, no, it's, it's either a tease for the next thing.

• 36:07Bill Simmons?

  No, no.

• 36:08Chris Ryan?

  It's a tease for the next movie, or it's like, we're just having Euros now because we just saved the world.

• 36:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, like the end of every Arrested Development episode kind of did this. They would do like a little closing tease or joke for the next episode, kind of.

• 36:21Bill Simmons?

  Should we start doing that?

• 36:22Chris Ryan?

  I would, I'm not against.

• 36:24Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, should we start doing that for rewatchables? Like the rewatchables ends and then it's like-

• 36:27Chris Ryan?

  Oh, and then it's just like a cold exit?

• 36:29Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 36:29Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, I like that.

• 36:30Bill Simmons?

  I'll work on that one. What were we gonna say?

• 36:32Chris Ryan?

  Oh, I just would, I, I'm, I'm pretty into every time a movie ends when it's just like, title card with, this person went on to do this.

• 36:40Bill Simmons?

  That's what I thought that was. Yeah, that's like Stripes.

• 36:43Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 36:44Bill Simmons?

  When they go through all the people in Stripes, but that's like an 80s, 90s thing. I don't feel like they do that anymore.

• 36:48Chris Ryan?

  Like open little doms.

• 36:49Speaker 02

  Yeah. Yeah, they, they usually only do it for like true stories, not where they actually tell you like what ended up happening to Billy Bean in Moneyball.

• 36:56Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 36:56Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 36:57Bill Simmons?

  Perry McDee had a question about the sure thing. He said, "The most obvious unanswerable question is, what was the sure thing doing as Gibb made his way across country?" Fair point.

• 37:07Chris Ryan?

  Crazy question.

• 37:08Bill Simmons?

  A smoking hot lady waiting for two weeks for this guy to drive across country. But I came up with an even better question after listening closely to the closing dialogue on my 73rd viewing. Did Gibb actually sleep with the sure thing?

• 37:20Chris Ryan?

  Hmm.

• 37:21Bill Simmons?

  After the professor reads his essay, which is not given as having to be completely factual, Allison said, "You didn't sleep with her." Gibb said, "You still seeing Jason? We broke up. That's too bad. You didn't sleep with her." Gibb says, "She wasn't my type." Notice that he never says no.

• 37:37Chris Ryan?

  It's not a no.

• 37:38Bill Simmons?

  Evidence for Gibb sleeping with her. She was every man's type. You're not backing down after cross-country and you just saw the girl you loved go off with her boyfriend who ostensibly have sex and they had no chance.

• 37:51Bill Simmons?

  It's a good one. I actually think, I would say it's 55, 45. He probably had sex with her and then was just never gonna tell her. Never gonna tell.

• 38:01Chris Ryan?

  I'm trying to think of other movies that have ambiguous conclusions like that because like.

• 38:06Bill Simmons?

  But did you feel like, I've seen that movie a million times. That never occurred to me.

• 38:09Chris Ryan?

  I never thought, I never thought Gibbs slept with her.

• 38:11Bill Simmons?

  That he actually did have sex with her. You never thought he slept with her?

• 38:14Chris Ryan?

  If anything, I think Gibb was a virgin, which he says he's not. He says he's had sex with like six people. But I, if anything, I thought he was like, that was driving all this anxiety.

• 38:25Speaker 02

  Yeah, the heart of the movie leads you to believe there's no way he does that. But he's in that really cool room, surrounded by beer, empty beer bottles. You know what I mean?

• 38:32Bill Simmons?

  It's Craig's favorite rewatchable 2025.

• 38:34Speaker 02

  Love that movie. Yeah.

• 38:34Bill Simmons?

  What did your list? You tweeted a list. You had a couple that you loved.

• 38:37Speaker 02

  Sure thing. The Sunset Sunrise Duo.

• 38:41Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Craig's a sensitive guy.

• 38:43Speaker 02

  Most bizarre was Species, but I enjoyed it. Blue Chips.

• 38:45Bill Simmons?

  You love Species.

• 38:46Speaker 02

  Love Species. Blue Chips. Um, yeah. Good hang or bad hang? The Species woman.

• 38:52Chris Ryan?

  The, the actual Natasha Henstridge?

• 38:54Speaker 02

  No, no, the character.

• 38:56Chris Ryan?

  Oh, uh, where's she?

• 38:59Speaker 02

  I think if you can keep her, you can keep her calm.

• 39:02Chris Ryan?

  Without her like biological imperative kicking in, I think she's probably a really good hang.

• 39:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 39:07Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 39:08Bill Simmons?

  I mean, certainly not opposed to partying in a bar and not wearing a lot of clothes.

• 39:12Chris Ryan?

  Chocolate pudding?

• 39:13Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 39:14Speaker 02

  Could you have tricked her into wearing a condom? And she would think like, why am I, why am I not getting pregnant? So she wouldn't kill you yet because you haven't inseminated her? Like if you just wore a condom and had sex with her a couple of times, maybe she would have no idea.

• 39:25Bill Simmons?

  Wow, that's a great idea.

• 39:26Chris Ryan?

  Well, what is it? Isn't she like?

• 39:27Speaker 02

  She's not aware of condoms.

• 39:27Bill Simmons?

  But she knew right away that she was inseminated.

• 39:31Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 39:31Bill Simmons?

  Cause she was like, it's happening.

• 39:33Speaker 02

  But if she finds her, if you figure out that you're her dream partner, you put on a condom, tell her this will help.

• 39:40Chris Ryan?

  Do you really want to be the guy who's been lying to her though?

• 39:42Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 39:42Chris Ryan?

  Like, do you think that she would ever rest?

• 39:44Bill Simmons?

  I think the guy is dying at some point after the encounter. It's just a matter of how long he can hang on.

• 39:49Chris Ryan?

  The LA club guy, was he have diabetes or something? Is that why she kills him?

• 39:52Speaker 02

  She can sense it.

• 39:53Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, it's insensitive.

• 39:54Bill Simmons?

  Tough feed for diabetes.

• 39:55Speaker 02

  It really is.

• 39:56Bill Simmons?

  Jonathan G in New Jersey.

• 39:58Speaker 02

  It would have been funny if he was like a Jets fan and she was like, no.

• 40:02Speaker 02

  She's making out with him and sees a Jets poster behind him. She's like.

• 40:06Chris Ryan?

  She looks at his Twitter and he's just like, we gotta keep Aaron Glenn.

• 40:10Bill Simmons?

  Did you see Todd McShay, who does stuff with us at The Ringer? He had a whole thing today about how Dante Moore should not come out if it's the Jets.

• 40:17Speaker 02

  Yeah, I kind of think that.

• 40:18Bill Simmons?

  Nobody in the draft should want to play for the Jets. It's just like shots fired at fantasy. He's just sitting here after a holiday, having a great time, getting ready to do movies. Have you not? Oh, this is from Jonathan G. in New Jersey. How have you not done an episode of the unwatchables yet? Like the rewatchables, but for awful movies, categories would be parallel opposites. For example, most unwatchable sequence, what's aged the worst? I guess those would stay the same. Bradley Beal Award for which actor just wanted to keep getting them checks. The George Lucas Award for milking a prequel or a sequel. The Jake Delome Award for character which ruined every scene they were in.

• 40:57Chris Ryan?

  Oh, my God.

• 40:59Bill Simmons?

  Just fucking dragged by shooting a Jake. I'm sure you'll come up with many more. We need this so badly for Caligula. I was thinking, who lost the movie is funny? And then would this movie have been better or worse with? Would this movie have been worse with Ryan Reynolds or Adam Driver?

• 41:16Chris Ryan?

  That's a very you way of looking at it, though. I like.

• 41:19Bill Simmons?

  But Adam Driver, the king of movies that make no money.

• 41:21Speaker 02

  Oh, I like Adam Driver.

• 41:22Chris Ryan?

  But Adam Driver rules.

• 41:24Bill Simmons?

  Win some games. I'm a win-loss record guy. Couple wins in there.

• 41:29Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 41:30Bill Simmons?

  Ryan Reynolds and who then? You like Ryan Reynolds, too?

• 41:33Speaker 02

  Uh, I don't know. I don't like modern Ryan Reynolds, but look, when Deadpool came out, did I like it? Yeah.

• 41:39Bill Simmons?

  All right. Well, who would be the, would this movie have been worse with blank or blank?

• 41:44Chris Ryan?

  This is tough. This is brutal.

• 41:48Bill Simmons?

  Chris is like, I don't know. I have so many friends in the industry.

• 41:50Chris Ryan?

  No, that's not what I'm trying to think of. I'm trying to think of like what? Somebody who turns me off to a movie.

• 41:57Speaker 02

  This is so, is it like The Rock and someone else?

• 42:01Bill Simmons?

  The Rock's good.

• 42:02Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, The Rock.

• 42:03Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, The Rock's good.

• 42:04Speaker 02

  It's like The Rock.

• 42:05Bill Simmons?

  Would this movie have been worse with The Rock or Vin Diesel?

• 42:07Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's, yeah. It's just Fast Six.

• 42:09Bill Simmons?

  Vin Diesel and Regarding Henry.

• 42:14Bill Simmons?

  Really good email from Samuel Kaplan. Says, first, my son and I really love the show. Shout out to the Kaplan Boys. For several years, we've had a traditional listening to it while we get bagels on the weekend and most other times when we were driving, just the two of us.

• 42:30Chris Ryan?

  That's nice.

• 42:30Bill Simmons?

  Love the father-son bonding. Wanted to express our appreciation. Thank you. Second, wanted to suggest two categories. One is the Mark Holton, "Hey, it's Enrico Palazzo" award for the best contribution by a performer with two or fewer lines.

• 42:44Chris Ryan?

  Oh, that's good.

• 42:45Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 42:47Chris Ryan?

  Man.

• 42:47Bill Simmons?

  I think that goes in flex and we just keep an eye on it for a while.

• 42:51Chris Ryan?

  It's like, it's whatever, what's a, is that like a smaller, even a smaller Dion Waiters contribution?

• 42:56Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Well, I remember when, I think I did.

• 42:59Chris Ryan?

  Is that a Colin Delspie award? Like.

• 43:02Bill Simmons?

  Well, I'd like the, "Hey, it's Enrico Palazzo" award because that guy had one line and it's the funniest line in the whole movie. So I think there's something there with that. And then he had, oh, CR is going to fucking love this one. The other is the Rick Chiketti Guard Meat Award for the most memorable death by a security guard or other bystander who the movie treats as inconsequential, but who probably had a spouse and kids who loved him.

• 43:27Chris Ryan?

  What movies?

• 43:28Bill Simmons?

  So he's the guy Carl kills, the security guard, to distract him from the Lakers game. There's like, hey, what about the Lakers in Die Hard? He's like, hey, what's going on in the Lakers game? That guy has two lives and just gets murdered.

• 43:42Chris Ryan?

  Triumph, two worthy, two points. That's a really good one.

• 43:47Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, that's really good. He probably had a spouse and kids who loved him.

• 43:51Chris Ryan?

  The, uh, the last couple of Stranger Things, there's like 160 US military service people are murdered by children. And it's, there's no remarks upon them whatsoever.

• 44:04Bill Simmons?

  No feud.

• 44:05Chris Ryan?

  It's like the worst military days since Shiloh. And they're just like, ah.

• 44:09Bill Simmons?

  Lot of questions about that. I'm gonna put both of those in flex. Yeah, that's a good one. Mark Johnson said, I was listening to the speed episode the other day and noticed toward the end, you basically spelled out the plot of The Hunt. I think the writers were listening. I don't know if this has already been pointed out to you, but you might be due some royalties. I have no recollection of this. The Hunt? Apparently, the movie The Hunt that came out in 2020, we gave the exact premise during the speed rewatchable. Speed? Yeah, we did speed like the, it was like the first 10 episodes we did.

• 44:38Bill Simmons?

  I'm trying to make the connection of how like we would have had like. I did, we must have gone on a tangent and come up with some sort of idea. Oh, wow. And then three years later, The Hunt. I don't know if I did that, but I know I created, um, The Purge. Yes. The Purge I created, I know for a fact. Never cut it in the world. When, when did you create The Purge? Kevin Wilds and I, I had this idea for, um, for, it called Leap Year, where every four years, there are no laws or rules. Right. Two years later, The Purge happened. Coincidence? Did they ever do a Purge Leap Year? Is that, did that ever happen? They did that, that, that, then it's like, now I can sue. Yeah.

• 45:16Bill Simmons?

  New category from Peter DeWolf. The Phoebe Kate Single-Handly Putting Young Men Through Puberty Award.

• 45:25Bill Simmons?

  Other winner, Lesha Cooper in The Girl Next Door. And I wrote down Apollonia, Linda Hamilton, Shannon Tweed, and Halle Berry would be four other ones.

• 45:37Bill Simmons?

  I really like this. I'm putting this in flex. My personal would be Sharon Stone and Basic Instinct. Yeah. Oh. Yeah, there's some good ones. Margot Robbie, Wolf, Wall Street? Yeah, we're gonna keep an eye on this category. We'll start following it in the AA tournament, see if there's something special there.

• 45:52Bill Simmons?

  This is a long email from Nicole D, but I'm doing it for Mallory because she listened to the Witness rewatchables and had to share this story. She was a sophomore at Harvard in 1995, 96 range. Harrison Ford coming to campus because he won the Hasty Pudding. Guy in my dorm is on the stage, can't invite me, go his date, big Harrison Ford fan, blah, blah, blah. I'm walking in the after party after the Hasty Pudding show. Who should be walking in right at the same time as me, but Harrison Ford?

• 46:18Chris Ryan?

  Okay. Starts off well.

• 46:21Bill Simmons?

  It's super loud, so I go up to him and lean toward him and say, Mr. Ford, you're the cutest carpenter since Jesus. He can't hear what I say, so he leans into me and puts his hand on the small of my back.

• 46:35Chris Ryan?

  It's over.

• 46:35Bill Simmons?

  Parentheses, I'm literally dying thinking about it again, hence the all caps, and says, excuse me? So I lean toward his ear again and say again, you're the cutest carpenter since Jesus. And with his hand still on the small of my back, all caps, he gives me that Harrison Ford smile and says, oh, you're sweet, and walks away. And then she writes, greatest moment of my life, second only to my kids being born. And now that I know he was a legendary stick man, I can't believe what I missed out on. Smiley face, huge fan of the show. Just a great email from Nicole D.

• 47:09Chris Ryan?

  This should be your move at Staples next time you go to a Lakers game and somebody's like,

• 47:14Bill Simmons?

  Small of the back, go right for the small of the back.

• 47:16Chris Ryan?

  And then just go, you're cute.

• 47:17Bill Simmons?

  He's like, what? I can't wait till Matt O'Leary hears that. All right, these are great. This is from Todd Conrad. This might be the best email of the bunch. His category ideas. Buckle up, CR. The Dennis Peck Relationship Test Award. The ultimate fidelity test between your movie's romantic leads, captured by Richard Gere's own Dennis Peck from Internal Affairs. Sure, John McClane might be able to hold on to Holly no matter what, but Dennis Peck is fucking Sally when Harry Burns is at work. On a scale of no thanks to I'm gonna teach your wife how to come.

• 47:56Bill Simmons?

  We assess just how strong our romantic leads would realistically be when faced with the Peck Test.

• 48:01Chris Ryan?

  We gotta do it for stuff like before sunrise.

• 48:06Bill Simmons?

  Don't leave her alone with Dennis Peck.

• 48:07Chris Ryan?

  If Julie Delphi runs into Richard Gere while Ethan Hawke is getting coffee.

• 48:11Bill Simmons?

  It's over.

• 48:12Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 48:12Bill Simmons?

  I love the Peck Test so much. That's just great. And he keeps going. The Bill Paxton game over man game over award for best hysterical outburst.

• 48:22Chris Ryan?

  That's from Aliens, which we have done.

• 48:23Bill Simmons?

  I gotta say, Bill Paxton is the most suggested, can you name a category after Bill Paxton actor? I think he's just absolutely the most beloved non-A-plus lister.

• 48:32Chris Ryan?

  Oh, absolutely.

• 48:33Bill Simmons?

  In rewatchables history. People love him. And then the, this looks like X location, but was definitely shot in Long Beach, location scout award. And he writes, as a Long Beach resident, I'm tired of my beloved city being treated like Hollywood's side piece, blocking off our streets without getting their flowers. Gone in 60 seconds, leave the weapon, Anchorman. This is a whole bunch of movies. It's Todd Conrad. The Dennis Peck Relationship Test. I can't wait. Next time we do a rom-com, we're bringing Dennis Peck.

• 49:03Chris Ryan?

  I'm just like running through like Dennis Peck and Royal Tenenbaums.

• 49:08Speaker 02

  The Notebook, he shows up.

• 49:12Bill Simmons?

  Notebook's over in 40 minutes.

• 49:18Chris Ryan?

  This fucking Gosling gets back and it's like Dennis Peck is sitting.

• 49:21Speaker 02

  I built this fucking house for you.

• 49:24Speaker 02

  Peck walks out.

• 49:25Bill Simmons?

  Josh in Atlanta.

• 49:28Bill Simmons?

  He said, I think the best case for Cruise being able to do Before Sunrise, because we argued about that, whether Cruise could have been before Sunrise. He says, Vanilla Sky. There's the crucial scene early in the movie where he meets Penelope Cruz's character at a party, stays up all night, falling in love with her at the airport, doesn't sleep with her. He's so charismatic, and it's unlike any other romantic scene featuring him I can think of, so Cruise gets my vote. That's a really good point. Cruise is really good in that Vanilla Sky stretch, where it's, it's the most rom-com-y he is in a movie, other than Jerry Maguire. And then Jerry Maguire is playing a maniac.

• 50:01Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, I mean, I guess risky business, but yeah.

• 50:03Bill Simmons?

  He was young in risky business. But yeah, so that's a change your, change your vote for Before Sunrise?

• 50:09Chris Ryan?

  I don't remember what my vote was.

• 50:11Bill Simmons?

  I think we set it on Hanks.

• 50:14Chris Ryan?

  Oh, in that sense, yeah, I think Hanks. But it definitely is, is worth thinking about. Vanilla Sky's a outlier.

• 50:22Bill Simmons?

  Kayden D. He has two category ideas that could pop up in the flex section. The first is basically the anti-coach Finstock award. I call it the Mr. Miyagi, that advice actually sucks ass award for worst life lesson, or advice that everyone in the movie takes at face value that sucks.

• 50:41Bill Simmons?

  He said, I feel pretty confident if my training consisted of wax on, wax off, and I got in a fight, I'd be brutally waxed off.

• 50:50Chris Ryan?

  In a lot of ways, like, have nothing in your life that you can't leave in 30 seconds is terrible advice and gets one of those guys killed.

• 50:58Speaker 02

  What is Finstock's actual advice?

• 51:01Bill Simmons?

  He has in Teen Wolf, he says.

• 51:03Speaker 02

  Isn't it like, you have to get 12 hours of sleep?

• 51:05Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, don't play cards with anybody who has a tattoo of a deck on their hand.

• 51:08Speaker 02

  Or no, who's named after a city?

• 51:10Bill Simmons?

  They're named after a city and then, whatever the three words. So I think my suggestion is, we tweet that to the, the Coach Finstock, Mr. Miyagi word for best or worst advice.

• 51:21Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 51:22Bill Simmons?

  And then we could do worst advice in that category as well.

• 51:25Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's good.

• 51:26Bill Simmons?

  Don't walk away from anything you can't leave in 30 seconds. Meanwhile, like Neil is like, like Val Kilmer gets shot, Neil's like, I gotta go back and save.

• 51:35Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 51:35Bill Simmons?

  It's like, I thought you could walk away from anything in 30 seconds, except for your buddy.

• 51:40Bill Simmons?

  Then he said the other one, this is great. So again, this is Kate and Dee. The second category suggestion, the Indiana Jones, why is everyone ignoring the fact that this guy definitely smells like wide open ass award for the person in the movie who stinks as a conspicuously goes along unnoticed? And he says, watching Raiders again, Marion is totally down to hook up with India on the ship after they leave Egypt. Why? He's filthy, he's been shot at, chased, living in the desert, abandoned in a tomb, covered in gasoline, sweaty as hell, no luggage beyond his satchel. Even if we give him the benefit of the doubt and assume his satchel exclusively has changes of underwear, this dude still smells like wide open ass.

• 52:19Chris Ryan?

  It's also still like the 1930s or 40s then.

• 52:21Bill Simmons?

  Oh, yeah. Marion's just like, what the hell I'm in and what world? So I feel like in the 1900s and even pre 1950s, I think body odor was much more accepted and appreciated.

• 52:33Chris Ryan?

  Oh, yeah, I think it's probably like, you're just nose blind. You know what I mean?

• 52:38Bill Simmons?

  Everyone's stunk. Like Napoleon used to tell his ladies, like, don't shower for three weeks before I'm back from war and shit like that.

• 52:44Chris Ryan?

  He did?

• 52:45Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 52:45Chris Ryan?

  Where'd you pull that one from?

• 52:46Bill Simmons?

  That's my Napoleon guy.

• 52:49Chris Ryan?

  Are you a Napoleon guy?

• 52:50Bill Simmons?

  No, my mom, my mom told me that once and it stuck with me for some reason.

• 52:53Chris Ryan?

  Interesting.

• 52:53Bill Simmons?

  She loves Napoleon.

• 52:57Bill Simmons?

  But I was thinking.

• 52:59Speaker 02

  You never forgot it.

• 53:00Bill Simmons?

  This is, uh.

• 53:02Bill Simmons?

  I think this is.

• 53:03Speaker 02

  So Napoleon kind of popularized that kink.

• 53:06Bill Simmons?

  I don't, I think body odor, people were just fine with people being stinky.

• 53:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 53:10Bill Simmons?

  And then that switched around the sixties. When you watch Unforgiven, like, there's no, those guys had like one bath a month. Well, so I was thinking.

• 53:17Speaker 02

  Everybody in Tombstone.

• 53:18Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 53:18Speaker 02

  Reeked.

• 53:20Bill Simmons?

  But in, in the modern era, a little different. Your nose palate's a little more sensitive. Could this be the David Morrison Proof of Life award? Oh, right. They rescue him at the end of Proof of Life. Meg Ryan's husband, even though she's sleeping with, uh, Russell Crowe, even though we don't see the scene, but we know it. And she sees him at the end, she's hugging him. He's been in a fucking, what, Venezuelan jungle? Yeah. For like two months, wearing the same clothes? He's got an absolute stink. Yeah. So wouldn't it be like, hey, good to see you? Let's get you washed up. Yeah, let's do, and I'll give you a hug later, after your shower.

• 53:53Speaker 02

  Is that movie, is it Venezuela?

• 53:54Bill Simmons?

  Uh.

• 53:55Speaker 02

  Colombia?

• 53:55Bill Simmons?

  Colombia. Yeah, Colombia, wherever it is. Well, I've seen it 20 times, I don't know where it's located. I'm gonna put that in the flex, though, test it out. Okay, Kyler, this is Craig's big award. Kyler Dennis, I sent this to Craig in advance. I know you guys are always kicking around new category ideas. In honor of Craig Horlbeck's love of shorter movies, I love that sign near epitaph now.

• 54:15Speaker 02

  Sure, yeah.

• 54:15Bill Simmons?

  What's that, what are your fantasy football things on your epitaph? What are your things that you're just like, I'm in on blank? Anything? Aaron Rodgers. Like receiver, Aaron Rodgers, who else?

• 54:24Speaker 02

  Um, guys that I'm just always in on?

• 54:27Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, or qualities, traits, things.

• 54:30Speaker 02

  Uh, I like guys who are, who freak athletes who run a slow 40. I always want to bet on those guys.

• 54:35Bill Simmons?

  There you go. Well, he calls this Craig Horlbeck Century Club award. Would this movie be better if it was 100 minutes?

• 54:42Speaker 02

  The answer is yes to most movies.

• 54:44Bill Simmons?

  He said the category works in three ways. Movies that, like after hours that come in right at 97 minutes, so they automatically qualify. Movies too long, that could be better. If you cut them down to 100 minutes, like Blues Brothers, it was 133 minutes, Replacements, 118. Or movies too short, sometimes you'll say, I actually could have used a couple more scenes.

• 55:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, like Truman Show, I thought, 10 more minutes.

• 55:06Bill Simmons?

  Halloween 4, 88 minutes.

• 55:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 55:08Bill Simmons?

  Big Daddy, 93.

• 55:09Speaker 02

  Sure thing, I could have had 10 more minutes of sure thing.

• 55:11Bill Simmons?

  Could have used a lot more Halloween 4, yeah. So. I I'm gonna workshop what he said there. If everything is based off the Horrback scale of a hundred minutes.

• 55:21Speaker 02

  Well, it's like too short, too long, just right.

• 55:23Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 55:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 55:24Bill Simmons?

  So you Horrback scale. If something's ninety-three, but you thought it should have been ninety-eight, like Horrback scale would have gone plus five on that.

• 55:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's more for movies like Tin Cup that are two hours and fifteen minutes and need could be a hundred.

• 55:37Bill Simmons?

  Horrback scale minus twenty-eight.

• 55:39Chris Ryan?

  Sure. Have you seen anything recently in theaters that you're like, that was just fifteen minutes too long?

• 55:43Bill Simmons?

  Marty's every movie.

• 55:44Speaker 02

  Marty Supreme, I think, could have been fifteen, twenty minutes shorter.

• 55:46Bill Simmons?

  Middle of Marty Supreme.

• 55:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 55:48Bill Simmons?

  I feel like could have been tighter.

• 55:49Speaker 02

  Two and a half hours. And that is not the type of movie that needs to be two and a half hours.

• 55:52Bill Simmons?

  The middle of that movie is fat.

• 55:54Speaker 02

  Like The Odyssey should be two hours and forty minutes.

• 55:56Chris Ryan?

  Supreme is such like a a Jenga tower that like even I was thinking when I saw it like if you took.

• 56:02Speaker 02

  I really liked it.

• 56:03Chris Ryan?

  If you took the dog.

• 56:04Speaker 02

  The dog stuff.

• 56:05Chris Ryan?

  Second dog run out.

• 56:07Bill Simmons?

  You're probably fine.

• 56:08Chris Ryan?

  But I and I actually think the movie doesn't, but it it just matters so much for Marty and Rachel. I don't know. Yeah.

• 56:14Bill Simmons?

  It'd be funny if we're criticizing Marty Supreme and then Sean just came bursting in.

• 56:18Speaker 02

  Kool-Aid man's in.

• 56:19Bill Simmons?

  Hold on, guys. You guys can take Dante Moore from me, but you can't take Marty Supreme.

• 56:24Speaker 02

  I liked Marty Supreme a lot, but yeah, I think it was like two hours and twenty-five minutes. I.

• 56:27Chris Ryan?

  I loved it. Yeah.

• 56:28Bill Simmons?

  So Horrback scale plus thirty-five?

• 56:32Speaker 02

  As saying it's thirty-five too long, maybe fifteen or twenty. But yeah.

• 56:36Bill Simmons?

  Is the premise that all movies should be a hundred minutes or or most rewatched movies?

• 56:40Speaker 02

  Lord of the Rings should not be a hundred minutes. I understand why that needs to be as long as it is.

• 56:43Bill Simmons?

  Maybe there are exceptions where you're like ineligible for Horrback scare. Like Marty Supreme ineligible.

• 56:49Speaker 02

  I see. Marty Supreme is eligible. But it's it's the epics, the movies that are trying to tell a grander story, those big adaptations, those I understand a little bit more than like a rom-com that's two hours and twenty minutes doesn't need.

• 57:01Chris Ryan?

  And a movie that's long that doesn't register on the Horrback scale should almost be get bonus points.

• 57:07Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 57:08Chris Ryan?

  Like the first Matrix, you would not, it's pretty long. You wouldn't take away a second.

• 57:12Speaker 02

  Like whatever Dark Knight is, I'm good with it. You know what I mean?

• 57:15Bill Simmons?

  I like putting this right before Roger's review, the time of the movie.

• 57:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 57:19Bill Simmons?

  We could just put it right there.

• 57:21Speaker 02

  Do you have opinions on that? Do you ever think like, do you care when you see a movie's two hours and forty minutes versus?

• 57:25Bill Simmons?

  C R is artist friendly.

• 57:27Speaker 02

  I know.

• 57:28Bill Simmons?

  It's like him that could have gone longer.

• 57:31Chris Ryan?

  I'm trying to think. In the movie theater.

• 57:35Speaker 02

  Like, when you look up a runtime, does that matter to you at all?

• 57:40Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, it does, especially when it's like an action movie or a comic book movie.

• 57:44Bill Simmons?

  I just assume everything's 220 now.

• 57:46Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 57:46Bill Simmons?

  I'm pleasantly surprised if we're at 105 minutes for a movie.

• 57:50Chris Ryan?

  That, I think, has become an issue where if you factor in getting to the movie theater in the half hour of trailers, like you're looking at like a four hour excursion, there are no five o'clockers. You cannot step into a movie theater, watch a 90 minute movie and be home for dinner.

• 58:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, I just also think there's something to be said about when you, when you have the parameters of, hey, you gotta make this movie in less than 100 minutes or 110 minutes. You are forced to make a movie better and tighter.

• 58:14Bill Simmons?

  Right.

• 58:14Speaker 02

  And be, and be more creative to get your point across. Instead of they're like, oh, Midnight Run can be two hours and 40 minutes, it would be a worse movie.

• 58:22Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 58:22Bill Simmons?

  Limitless, 105 minutes.

• 58:24Speaker 02

  There you go. Number 16.

• 58:26Bill Simmons?

  Taken, 88.

• 58:28Chris Ryan?

  Yep.

• 58:29Bill Simmons?

  Taken's like you're surprised it's ending.

• 58:31Chris Ryan?

  How, how long is Devil Wears Prada?

• 58:34Bill Simmons?

  I think that's a little longer.

• 58:35Chris Ryan?

  A little longer?

• 58:35Bill Simmons?

  I think that's closer to 8.

• 58:36Speaker 02

  It can't be too long, though, right?

• 58:38Bill Simmons?

  I can look that up right now. Yeah, it's, it's, I'm gonna say less than two hours. Cause it has to fit into that TBS.

• 58:46Speaker 02

  Hour 49. Yeah, cause they needed to fit it in the two hour window to sell ads on, on cable. And now, obviously, on streaming, it doesn't really matter.

• 58:53Bill Simmons?

  I like the Horrill Beck scale. Josh Dolgin, I hope I say it's either Dolgin or Dolgan. I truly believe Bill and Van's takedown of Rose from Titanic is the greatest podcast segment of all time.

• 59:07Bill Simmons?

  Stop, might not be wrong. It's a pretty great segment. In the spirit of that legendary 10 minutes, I'd like to nominate a new category. The Rose from Titanic Award for the character who underrated sucks. I don't know if there's enough movies with this, but it might, it could be in a flex.

• 59:21Chris Ryan?

  This actually might be a way to spice What's Aged the Worst up a little bit.

• 59:25Bill Simmons?

  Throw it in there?

• 59:25Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 59:26Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 59:27Chris Ryan?

  Cause What's Aged the Worst is hard.

• 59:29Bill Simmons?

  Heat.

• 59:31Bill Simmons?

  Do we need the Natalie Portman character?

• 59:34Chris Ryan?

  Well, we talked about that a lot.

• 59:35Bill Simmons?

  Do we need that whole subplot with the daughter? Where does it go?

• 59:39Speaker 02

  Is it, they quietly suck or we don't need them in the movie?

• 59:42Bill Simmons?

  It's the easiest cut in the movie, right?

• 59:45Speaker 02

  This is like the Pam from The Office thing that like Pam actually kinda sucked if you like think back on who she was towards Jim the entire show. She like wasn't a great partner.

• 59:54Chris Ryan?

  Holding him back from Sports Agent.

• 59:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 59:56Chris Ryan?

  Work.

• 59:56Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 59:58Chris Ryan?

  He could have been on Game Over now with Max Kellerman.

• 1:00:00Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:00:01Chris Ryan?

  Was it for Pam?

• 1:00:02Speaker 02

  Showing him her dumb drawings.

• 1:00:05Bill Simmons?

  Justin Pagano writes in, "Please add the Robert Town Award for overblown film school English major interpretation of the film. Then give your over reading version of the movie's plot. Bonus points if you include snooty phrases like man struggle verse blank." I, just in a direct attack on fantasy. I don't know why he had to do that.

• 1:00:22Speaker 02

  I think on all of us. We're big Bob Town guys.

• 1:00:24Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, we like Bob Town. This is from Jay Tate. He says, "Can we add the what a dick move award for a scene in the movie that makes you so mad? It makes you say, why the hell do they do that? Like the time in Dazed and Confused when Hirschfelder's friends pulled him away from making out with the girl at the junior high dance? Only for him to get beat with a paddle by Ben Affleck. Hold that thought." Andrew Katz writes in, "The Ted Cruz versus Mitch McConnell, AKA most punchable character award. Basically, nobody likes these guys. The word would be given to the character who isn't necessarily the villain, but definitely needs to be punched in the face. Take school ties. Matt Damon is clearly the main villain."

• 1:01:00Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:01:00Bill Simmons?

  "But I've always wanted to punch Anthony Rapp and his anti-Semitic Coke bottle glasses in the face the most, or maybe the jerk French teacher. If you're afraid of getting too political, feel free to remove Ted and Mitch from the name. You could use Bill Laimbeer, Novak Djokovic, or Tonya Harding."

• 1:01:19Bill Simmons?

  I do like the idea of I just wanna punch that character in the face.

• 1:01:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:01:23Bill Simmons?

  They're not quite the villains, but they're fucking annoying.

• 1:01:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:01:27Bill Simmons?

  But I don't know if it comes up enough, so. I was thinking Dead Poets Society, the guy who sells out Mr. Keating, Cameron.

• 1:01:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:01:34Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. What do you think he's gonna do to you, Nwanda?

• 1:01:41Bill Simmons?

  Here we go, CR. The Dana Wheeler Nicholson Award.

• 1:01:44Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:44Bill Simmons?

  AKA the Deborah Kara Inger Award for an actress who was great in a specific movie and just should have had a much bigger career. Previous winners Dana Wheeler Nicholson, Deborah Kara Inger, Mia Sarah, Diana Benora, and Virginia Madsen. It's from Eric S. That's the Mia Sarah Award to me.

• 1:02:01Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:02Bill Simmons?

  I'm still outraged that we didn't have five more Mia Sarah movies.

• 1:02:06Chris Ryan?

  And did we ever get an explanation of what the deal was there?

• 1:02:10Bill Simmons?

  I can't remember.

• 1:02:10Chris Ryan?

  Ferris Bueller's Girlfriend. You saw Ferris Bueller.

• 1:02:12Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, fantastic. Everyone was in love with her. Barely saw her again for the next five years.

• 1:02:15Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:17Bill Simmons?

  I don't mind the Mia Sarah Award. I think it's like, it's a flex. You'll know it when you see it.

• 1:02:21Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:22Bill Simmons?

  Throw it in there.

• 1:02:25Bill Simmons?

  Oh, boy. Ted from Milwaukee. The new category I propose is the Deshaun Jackson Award for rewatchable movies who drop the ball on the one-yard line and are therefore not great movies. Flex category. Best example is The Running Man. We were denied an epic showdown between Ben Richards and Captain Freedom. He's talking about the old Running Man.

• 1:02:44Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:46Bill Simmons?

  A showdown between Schwarzenegger and Ventura would have been a major deal in 87 and would have elevated the movie's cultural cachet as they went into politics. Instead, we get an unnecessarily morally questionable dynamo scene. Never get to see Jesse Ventura. Fight him. It's Ted from Milwaukee.

• 1:03:02Bill Simmons?

  I don't think it happens enough times to be a flex category, but I like, I like the spirit of it. Like, I thought I was getting this and you didn't give it to me.

• 1:03:10Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, I feel like anecdotally, I can't think of a movie specifically. We've done plenty of rewatchables where we're like, and then it kind of falls apart in the last half hour or something like that. But I, I just can't think of one off the top of my head.

• 1:03:22Bill Simmons?

  That just, the last thing fucks it up.

• 1:03:26Chris Ryan?

  This was, I actually, I mean, I think, I mentioned Sunshine. Like, that's a really good example of a movie that drops the ball on the, on the 10-yard line.

• 1:03:32Bill Simmons?

  House of Dynamite?

• 1:03:35Bill Simmons?

  That's a great one. We'd never do that. See, the problem is most of the movies we wouldn't do in the rewatchables because the ending sucked. Yeah. So we'll keep an eye on that one. All right, we'll take one more break and then I can't wait for this next one.

• 1:03:48Speaker 03

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• 1:04:32Bill Simmons?

  This episode is brought to by Ethos. As a parent, life insurance feels like a no-brainer. It just gives me peace of mind knowing my family will be taken care of. And Ethos makes getting it fast and easy. Apply online in minutes. Get up to 3 million in coverage with no medical exam, just a few simple health questions. Take 10 minutes to get covered today with life insurance through Ethos. Get your free quote at ethos.com/rewatch. That is E-T-H-O-S dot com slash rewatch. Application times may vary. Rates may vary. All right. It's not officially a rewatchables mailbag until we antagonize CR. This is from Sam from DC who wants us to create the "I can't believe Karl-Anthony Towns had a better

• 1:05:17Bill Simmons?

  career than Joel Embiid had worn." What? For when two actors in a film end up with career trajectories radically different from what their early works would have suggested. And then he said, "I do believe that Towns will end up with a better career than Embiid."

• 1:05:33Chris Ryan?

  What a fucking bullshit blast shit.

• 1:05:35Bill Simmons?

  It's from DC. He's just angry. He's angry about the Trey Johnson pick. I was thinking though, this would have been a good one for Davor's proud ironically Emily Blunt and Anne Hathaway.

• 1:05:43Chris Ryan?

  Sure. Yeah.

• 1:05:45Bill Simmons?

  Where you never would have expected Anne Hathaway's had a good career, but Emily Blunt became, I think, a bigger star of her. I wouldn't have guessed that when I saw the movie.

• 1:05:52Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:53Bill Simmons?

  A little like the Carl Townsend B draft.

• 1:05:54Chris Ryan?

  Right.

• 1:05:56Bill Simmons?

  Robert Sean Leonard in Dead Poets versus like Josh Charles. I don't think you would have guessed Josh Charles would still be the one.

• 1:06:03Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:04Bill Simmons?

  Like leading TV shows over Robert Sean Leonard? I don't know. I thought that was a good one though.

• 1:06:09Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, that was good.

• 1:06:09Bill Simmons?

  I also like that it made CR mad.

• 1:06:11Chris Ryan?

  I'm trying to think of, um, like when you were watching Stand By Me. Obviously we lost over Phoenix, but like, would you have guessed that either any of the other kids in that movie would have got, had bigger careers?

• 1:06:23Speaker 02

  Like Jerry O'Connell?

• 1:06:24Bill Simmons?

  Jerry O'Connell would have put the most relevant of all the careers. Yeah. You would not have guessed that.

• 1:06:30Bill Simmons?

  Mitchell wants us to change Cruz versus Hanks and add Denzel. And then wants us to go back and relitigate all of the ones we've already done and go with Denzel. That seemed really complicated.

• 1:06:40Chris Ryan?

  If we ever are like, we don't have an episode this week, I guess we could do that.

• 1:06:45Bill Simmons?

  I like adding Denzel for 2026.

• 1:06:48Chris Ryan?

  Okay.

• 1:06:50Bill Simmons?

  You don't like it? You love Cruz versus Hanks?

• 1:06:51Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, there's something special about Cruz versus Hanks. It like, it being either or, like a binary question to me is much, much better.

• 1:06:58Bill Simmons?

  Is there anyone Denzel could compete against?

• 1:07:03Bill Simmons?

  Cause we also talked about Pacino versus De Niro too. You love Cruz versus Hanks for you is like.

• 1:07:09Chris Ryan?

  Love it.

• 1:07:09Bill Simmons?

  Bird versus magic.

• 1:07:10Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, it's also like, it's never a boring conversation.

• 1:07:13Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:07:15Speaker 02

  I don't know. You can do Denzel.

• 1:07:17Chris Ryan?

  Cause there's ones, the goofy personable kind, and the other person is just the like, you're an alien, but you're perfect.

• 1:07:22Bill Simmons?

  You know, the more we talk this out, Denzel's also, every movie's better with Denzel. Like it almost like ruins the category. There's certain ones.

• 1:07:29Chris Ryan?

  There was one, I think, I can't remember. He talked, he was talking with Jamie Foxx once and he was like, I passed on seven. And that's the one I like regret. And I'm like, Denzel Washington's in seven. It's like Citizen Kane. It's like, I can't imagine how fucking good that movie is.

• 1:07:46Speaker 02

  Should we add more this or that guys? Wasn't there a female one we were gonna do?

• 1:07:51Bill Simmons?

  We, we tried out the five Jennifers and it just couldn't, didn't really work.

• 1:07:54Chris Ryan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:07:55Speaker 02

  Yeah. Like you could, you could do like Pitt or Leo.

• 1:07:58Chris Ryan?

  Blunder Hathaway?

• 1:08:00Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:02Bill Simmons?

  That's pretty good. Everybody loves Emily Blunt, though. You couldn't do Meryl Streep versus everybody, because she kills everybody.

• 1:08:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:08:10Bill Simmons?

  And we can never crack this one.

• 1:08:13Bill Simmons?

  Another Justin Pagano email, unless I accidentally wrote the name thing or copy pasted it wrong twice. He said he was in high school and Project X came out and Kid Guti was a big deal for him. But our needle drop category has to be named after Bohemian Rhapsody in Wayne's World. It's the most electrifying needle drop of any rewatchable movie, as evidenced by the fact that the scene won a number of categories when he did the episode. Love the show.

• 1:08:37Bill Simmons?

  I think it's funny that Project X is a category.

• 1:08:40Speaker 02

  Look, the scene in Wayne's World doesn't make me want to do ecstasy, so I'm gonna stick with Project.

• 1:08:45Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I think, I don't think we're moving.

• 1:08:49Bill Simmons?

  Chris A. has a really interesting idea for a theme month.

• 1:08:53Bill Simmons?

  He's a longtime reader, few-time writer, semi-longtime listener. I was wondering if you would have a one-for-me-only month. A month where Bill, then Chris, then Sean, then Van choose the movie and make the other three see movies they haven't seen. So Chris would have to watch Inside Moves, Bill would have to be part of the Re: Big Lebowski. Sean would have you do some Igmar Bergman thing.

• 1:09:21Bill Simmons?

  And Van would make everyone watch the toy.

• 1:09:23Speaker 02

  The three of you should just each pick a different Lord of the Rings.

• 1:09:26Bill Simmons?

  I know.

• 1:09:26Speaker 02

  And make him watch the trilogy.

• 1:09:29Bill Simmons?

  Ben said if it's a five-week month, Mal, it would be great. Thank you and have a nice day. So that'd be Yankee Christmas Swap Month.

• 1:09:34Speaker 02

  That's great. That's good.

• 1:09:35Bill Simmons?

  We should give a movie.

• 1:09:36Speaker 02

  We could do that next December.

• 1:09:38Bill Simmons?

  Next December.

• 1:09:38Speaker 02

  Good idea.

• 1:09:39Bill Simmons?

  I like that idea.

• 1:09:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:09:40Bill Simmons?

  All right.

• 1:09:41Chris Ryan?

  But you have to do it, though. You can't be like, ah, I'm sick this week. I can't do Fellowship of the Ring.

• 1:09:45Bill Simmons?

  I'd have to do any movie. That would be the rule. So if we did four.

• 1:09:49Speaker 02

  That can be the next fantasy football punishment.

• 1:09:51Bill Simmons?

  Well, the funniest thing is Van would take it way too seriously and spend 10 weeks trying to figure out the movie and asking people on Twitter. And then he'd probably land at the toy. That's where it would end up. Scott Komich.

• 1:10:07Bill Simmons?

  Some hurtful stuff in this email.

• 1:10:11Bill Simmons?

  "I've tried to like Miami Vice, but I can't do it. Bad acting, confusing plot, horrible dialogue and bad casting.

• 1:10:20Bill Simmons?

  Gong Li, her character, had a cousin that was the harbor master in Havana?

• 1:10:23Chris Ryan?

  Yep.

• 1:10:24Bill Simmons?

  How about a Latin actress or Cuban one? Next, it has some of the worst dialogue I can remember in a movie. Gong Li, how fast does that go? Farrell, serious, low, mumbly voice. It goes very fast. What do you like to drink? Serious, low, mumbly voice. I'm a fiend for mojitos. Give me a break."

• 1:10:41Chris Ryan?

  You can only leave people who's so close to the water. They don't want to drink. It's up to them.

• 1:10:46Bill Simmons?

  He said, "Bill, in order for you and Sierra to prove your love for this movie, the next month, for the next month, anytime anyone asks for you what you want to drink, mumble in a very serious, low voice, I'm a fiend for mojitos."

• 1:10:56Chris Ryan?

  We already do that.

• 1:10:57Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, it was like he absolutely doesn't know us.

• 1:10:59Chris Ryan?

  What's in that cup right now?

• 1:11:00Bill Simmons?

  On New Year's Eve. Finally, Crockett was frisked before going into the meeting and yet somehow he smuggled in a grenade? Was it up his ass?

• 1:11:10Bill Simmons?

  Those are his Miami Vice nitpicks. Then he goes, "Roy Hobbs hits the final homerun in the natural. They show him rounding second base while he'll be showering, showered in sparks from the blown out lights. Were the fans killed? Not covered." That was his nitpick for there. This guy's got a lot of nitpicks. This is the best one, though. "In hereditary, the oldest son gets possessed when the mother cuts off her own head. The demon floats through the air and lands on the kid. Why didn't the demon possess him when he was driving the car and the little kid got decapitated? Where was the demon hanging out between the time when the girl was killed and possessed Toni Collette's character? And why did they keep the car? Wouldn't the inside and outside of the car be covered in blood? Did they just get it steam cleaned and keep driving it? That's the most fucked up thing about this movie. I would have sold the car."

• 1:11:51Chris Ryan?

  I think they may have been a multi-car household. I don't, you know, I think Gabriel Byrne and Toni Collette, like they were, they each had their own vehicle.

• 1:11:58Bill Simmons?

  I'm selling the car immediately or just burning it.

• 1:12:01Chris Ryan?

  What's the Carfax on that?

• 1:12:02Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. History.

• 1:12:05Chris Ryan?

  Do you have to disclose decapitation?

• 1:12:07Bill Simmons?

  To blend decapitation. Does decapitation in the Carfax report?

• 1:12:12Chris Ryan?

  I don't think you have to go specifically what the accident was, but that was definitely an accident. I think Payman is being summoned for three quarters of that movie, right? Or even for most of her life, like the-

• 1:12:23Bill Simmons?

  But he's watching the Avalanche game.

• 1:12:25Chris Ryan?

  That's right.

• 1:12:27Chris Ryan?

  He's like their fucking power play.

• 1:12:28Bill Simmons?

  The playoffs, man. Payments grow to playoff beard.

• 1:12:33Bill Simmons?

  Neil R. writes, I love the Tony Romo, Chris Collins, where DVD commentary category. Along those lines for 2026, how about the Donald Trump truth social post review of the movie? It'd be really funny to hear CR's Trump take on any movie. Any humor to get us through the next two years would be helpful. I'm not against this.

• 1:12:53Chris Ryan?

  I need something to replace Wayne. I think we got to put Wayne on ice for a little while.

• 1:12:57Bill Simmons?

  Wayne, I think we took it as far as it can go.

• 1:13:00Chris Ryan?

  It's like, I, I think it's like the tush push, you know? It was really cool for a while and now everybody's just a little tired of it.

• 1:13:08Bill Simmons?

  I think we peaked when you told Glenn Powell about it and he had no idea what you were doing.

• 1:13:12Chris Ryan?

  That's good. I like that. He was like, that's really cool. And I'm like, but if you don't know what it is, there's no way you think it's cool.

• 1:13:19Bill Simmons?

  Donald Trump true social.

• 1:13:21Chris Ryan?

  It's good. Yeah.

• 1:13:22Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, that's good. What, what was the one we did on F1? Terrible movie. Hated the rice car scenes.

• 1:13:29Chris Ryan?

  JP should have won. That is all.

• 1:13:32Bill Simmons?

  Amanda S., I'll skip that one, actually. She had a Jim Cotté email that she thought, um, was a fever dream when she was 12 and didn't know it was an actual movie. And then it turned out it was, so I'm glad I was hoping to help her. Padreak, I think I pronounced that correctly. P A D R A I C. Padraic?

• 1:13:52Chris Ryan?

  Patrick.

• 1:13:53Bill Simmons?

  Patrick?

• 1:13:54Chris Ryan?

  I think.

• 1:13:56Bill Simmons?

  Looking at the list of films you're showing over the weekend, I think this was the Boston weekend. Gave me a flex category idea. Most scalable insult.

• 1:14:05Bill Simmons?

  Now get your fucking shine box.

• 1:14:06Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:07Bill Simmons?

  I'm the guy that does his job. You must be the other guy. Well, the world needs plenty of bartenders. I drink your milkshake. There's lots of potential here. Excited to hear Sean tell CR to get his fucking shine box on stage down since the sports guy cartoons. So this guy, Dave Panko from Down Under, which I assume is Australia, he suggested the Jack Waltz, Dago Guinea Wap, Greaseball, Gumbo, Kraut, Nick Friend Award for best insult. I do think there's a best insult award we could put in there. Who's that named after?

• 1:14:36Chris Ryan?

  Uh, I, I like the Jack Waltz Award.

• 1:14:41Bill Simmons?

  Well, let me tell you something, my Kraut, we Kraut, Nick Friend.

• 1:14:46Bill Simmons?

  I like this, though, like best insult that you could actually just bring into your real life situation. Yeah, so probably not your mother sucks cocks in hell. That one would qualify. That's not a good one. I have, Shinebox is still probably the best.

• 1:15:00Chris Ryan?

  Go get your fucking Shinebox.

• 1:15:01Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:01Chris Ryan?

  That's like an idea.

• 1:15:02Bill Simmons?

  Cause he leads it up. Like, he really, like, works it to get to the.

• 1:15:05Chris Ryan?

  Cause then there's like a separate award that would be for a line from this movie that has entered the pop culture lexicon. I don't know what that would be necessarily, but.

• 1:15:12Bill Simmons?

  Maybe it's the Billy.

• 1:15:13Chris Ryan?

  The kind of thing you hear Rich Eisen say a lot. You know what I mean?

• 1:15:16Bill Simmons?

  So maybe it's the Billy Bats Jack Waltz Award for best.

• 1:15:20Chris Ryan?

  Best insult.

• 1:15:20Bill Simmons?

  Best scalable insult in a movie?

• 1:15:22Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 1:15:23Bill Simmons?

  I like that. Dave Penko also suggests the Tone Loc Slick Ain't No Joke Award for Most Ridiculous Connecting of the Dots. I don't know if that's a reference of Heat.

• 1:15:35Chris Ryan?

  It's fucking Heat. And it's, it is really.

• 1:15:37Bill Simmons?

  Calling everybody slick. And they're like, I know who that is.

• 1:15:40Chris Ryan?

  The last two times I've seen Heat, I was like, this is so fucked up that they like, the entire thing is hinged on him saying slick.

• 1:15:48Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:48Chris Ryan?

  And him being like, runs slick through the database as an alias.

• 1:15:54Bill Simmons?

  Maybe that could be the for Heat, where we just shit on Heat for like an hour and a half on the things that's wrong with it. Uh, he also suggests the Michael Corleone In My Home Award for Unexpected Raised Volume. Yeah. Let's just go to Pachito all the time. Yeah. Yeah. Where my children sleep and play. Grant McPhee said, uh, my category suggestion is the Michael Myers Shoot 'Em Again Award. The scene that makes the audience feel is that they're actually in the movie themselves interacting and reacting to the characters named after the scene in 78 Halloween, when Dr. Loomis shoots Michael Myers. And one of the audience members stood up and yelled out, shoot him again. There's video of that. It's from Grant in London, Ontario, Canada.

• 1:16:38Bill Simmons?

  I don't know if that's good enough for a flex, but I enjoyed it. And then Pat Grover wrote in, seeing as you shoehorn a Michael Myers reference into every single one of your BS pods and rewatchables, maybe make it a new category. Whether it's Yannis being like Michael Myers, or you finding a way to compare Before Sunrise to Michael Myers. You always find a way to squeeze it in unnecessarily. So the new category could be, where could Michael Myers be shoehorned in this film or pod? Wait, you already do this pretty much anyway, right?

• 1:17:05Chris Ryan?

  Well, now you're just, you're just begging to go to bring Dennis back up.

• 1:17:08Bill Simmons?

  Pat Grover, like, sticking it.

• 1:17:12Speaker 02

  Fine, Michael Myers is retired for Dennis Beck.

• 1:17:14Chris Ryan?

  No more Dennis Beck in, Myers out. Gonna replace the Halloween four with a Dennis Beck.

• 1:17:24Bill Simmons?

  Doug Evans acknowledges that Tom Cruise is the best runner in action movies, as I think we all do. Who's the best runner for comedy movies, he asks. And he'd like to nominate Michael J. Fox for running, sliding, falling on slick fours in Teen Wolf, racy, jumping, falling in an office chase in Secret My Success, and multiple Back to the Futures. Is he the comedy movie running goat?

• 1:17:48Speaker 02

  Well, is the goal to be funny or good at running?

• 1:17:50Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:17:51Bill Simmons?

  He was really good at the slides where he'd be like coming around the corner and he would like skate like a motorcycle.

• 1:17:56Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:17:57Bill Simmons?

  I think being really small helped him like with the running scenes because he's very low to the ground.

• 1:18:01Chris Ryan?

  They do some, there's some good sliding while running around the corner in Breakfast Club two. They like slide across the hallway, basically.

• 1:18:08Speaker 02

  That's good.

• 1:18:09Chris Ryan?

  Ali Sheedy and Emilio Estevez do that.

• 1:18:11Speaker 02

  Michael Sarah in Superbad's got a great run.

• 1:18:13Chris Ryan?

  Oh, my God.

• 1:18:14Speaker 02

  Fastest kid alive.

• 1:18:14Chris Ryan?

  Absolutely.

• 1:18:15Speaker 02

  His form, he's kind of doing a Cruise impression. Not bad.

• 1:18:19Chris Ryan?

  Fastest kid alive.

• 1:18:21Bill Simmons?

  I'm putting something, I'll add that to the running flex. Walker G. says, please do Dark Knight Rises if only as an excuse to do Collinsworth impressions of Bane blowing up the stadium.

• 1:18:34Chris Ryan?

  Oh, Mike.

• 1:18:34Bill Simmons?

  Bane is feeling it right here, Mick.

• 1:18:37Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, this city's been crying out for a new stadium, Mike, and they're gonna get it. Yeah, this is one way to blow up a stadium, Mike.

• 1:18:46Chris Ryan?

  Taxpayers are gonna have a tough pill to swallow building a new one, but.

• 1:18:51Bill Simmons?

  John B. from Malden, he has an idea for the town too. Still holding out hope for this because Doug McCray is alive at the end of the movie in the Florida Keys. He thinks it should be something with Southie and the Boston St. Patrick's Day Parade. Growing up Shine, now working for a corrupt Southie politician who's cracking down on crime, wants to have a political fundraiser on parade day in Castle Island to raise money for Merrill Run. She organizes a crew to rip it off, but the plan guy, Butchy Coughlin, nephew of Jim, gets arrested. She shows up on Claire's door and says, I need to get in touch with them. I know you know what I mean. Doug comes back. The heist is spearheaded by Shine, Claire, and Doug. Claire? Yeah, Claire's involved. She's a crossover. It's like, fast forward, Paul Walker is

• 1:19:36Bill Simmons?

  just on the, on the bad guys theme all of a sudden. Comes together for a climactic, slow-moving chase through the streets of Southie, surrounded by shitfaced boss, the 20-somethings, maybe a boat scene, just workshopping it. There's something there with the kids of the town. Have you ever asked Affleck about Town 2? Doesn't seem like it's high on his agenda list. Okay, yeah. Yeah. So, we're getting Heat 2, we think. We are, yeah. Devil Wears Proto is coming out this year. Is there... Listen, the Town 2 would make $200 million. It's just a fucking fact. Yeah, I mean, like- $200 million is the floor. We're also in the last couple of innings before, while those guys can still realistically do that. Right. Like, Ham could still be an FBI agent. Like, they could still do all that.

• 1:20:20Bill Simmons?

  Oh, Ham's like a retired FBI agent. So, I agree with, uh, John B. from Malden, that Shine is the key to the Town 2. Cause Shine, how old is she in Town? She's like a little kid, toddler, right? She's like 3? Yeah. So now, she, Town came out in 2010. She's making this for 2027. So she'd be like 20? Yeah. Maybe she's working like at a strip joint in Saugus? Sydney Sweeney, yeah. Sydney Sweeney, too old. Oh, okay. Maybe, you're just grabbing anyone from Landman. Whoever the, who was the stripper physical therapist working with Sam Elliott last night? Where's that? She's in. Just signed her.

• 1:20:59Bill Simmons?

  Andy and I talked about that for like 35 minutes. One of the best ideas I've ever had. Did I have a stroke and miss 3 scenes? How did that happen? Yeah, I don't know. What's on the big board of sequels you would actually want to get made that you would go see? Town 2. Is that's number 1, draft pick?

• 1:21:15Speaker 02

  Heat, is Heat 2 number one? We're getting Heat 2.

• 1:21:17Bill Simmons?

  I'm too scared of Heat 2 because it's too mea-

• 1:21:19Chris Ryan?

  I think we're all really confused about how we feel about it.

• 1:21:20Bill Simmons?

  Heat 2 is too meaningful, though.

• 1:21:21Speaker 02

  Is there anywhere you were like, I actually don't care, I'm, I'm, I would want them to make this and I would go see it happily?

• 1:21:26Bill Simmons?

  I like The Town 2 because the premise of-

• 1:21:30Chris Ryan?

  I just don't think it's as good without Renner. I think Renner makes that movie.

• 1:21:33Bill Simmons?

  Well, this is the problem we had with Den of Thieves 2.

• 1:21:35Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:36Bill Simmons?

  Was we lost-

• 1:21:36Chris Ryan?

  Right.

• 1:21:37Bill Simmons?

  Pablo.

• 1:21:38Chris Ryan?

  And 50.

• 1:21:39Bill Simmons?

  And we lost 50 and it wasn't the same movie because we, but I think this is where Damon comes in.

• 1:21:45Chris Ryan?

  Uh, well, isn't that basically-

• 1:21:47Bill Simmons?

  Damon's still pissed that he wasn't in The Town. So Damon's in as like Jem's brother.

• 1:21:52Chris Ryan?

  Ben?

• 1:21:52Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:55Bill Simmons?

  Johnny.

• 1:21:55Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:56Bill Simmons?

  Um, and they bring Doug. I think Doug coming back from the Keys after 15 years is just a great premise for anything. Him having to extract, extract Shine. Maybe Shine turns out to be his kid. Something there. I like, Boston's changed too. Like, they could do Southie. They can move stuff from Charlestown to Southie, which would, which would matter. Jason Peters says, why don't you all just do a theme month called Red October? All the movies could be Russian themed as well. Hunt for Red October, Red Dawn, Moscow on the Hudson, Bridget Spies and Reds.

• 1:22:29Bill Simmons?

  I don't know about Hunt for Red October. Should we do that one?

• 1:22:32Chris Ryan?

  Keep going.

• 1:22:34Bill Simmons?

  Red Dawn, that's good. Moscow on the Hudson's not good enough.

• 1:22:36Chris Ryan?

  If we did Moscow month and we didn't do Hunt for Red October, I'd quit.

• 1:22:41Bill Simmons?

  Reds would be interesting. I'm not sure that's a rewatchable movie. It's a great movie. It's a long ass movie.

• 1:22:45Chris Ryan?

  It would be a really cool, like, if you wanted to do-

• 1:22:48Bill Simmons?

  Reds would be fun for the research and the dialogue about making the movie.

• 1:22:51Chris Ryan?

  And also just like Hackman in it and stuff.

• 1:22:54Bill Simmons?

  Nicholson.

• 1:22:55Chris Ryan?

  Yeah. I mean, I think it would be fun to do the two cassette-er. Like the, like the movies that are like, we used to be in two cassettes when you would rent them from the video store.

• 1:23:05Bill Simmons?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:23:06Chris Ryan?

  And it would be fun to do like that. Prince of the City was like that.

• 1:23:10Bill Simmons?

  Well, could it just be four movies that have Red in it? Red Dawn, Red October, Reds, and then a fourth Red?

• 1:23:19Bill Simmons?

  Red Eye?

• 1:23:20Chris Ryan?

  Kristoff Kraszewski's Three Colors Red, though.

• 1:23:23Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, anything with red. Alright, I grabbed it. Jake Curley, this is good. "Watching Goodfellas last night, noticed Polly is two completely different people before and after Henry gets pinched as a kid. Goes from barely audible Grim Reaper mob boss to gregarious wise guy yelling down the steps, 'You popped your cherry!' It's as if they totally rewrote his character mid-movie."

• 1:23:47Chris Ryan?

  Nope.

• 1:23:47Bill Simmons?

  Hence the new category, the Polly Award, for the writers definitely rewrote this character in the middle of the film.

• 1:23:53Chris Ryan?

  The whole thing is it's Henry's perception of Polly changes. It's not Polly changing.

• 1:23:59Bill Simmons?

  I agree. I was trying to think of other examples of a character getting rewritten.

• 1:24:04Chris Ryan?

  It happens way more on TV.

• 1:24:06Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:07Chris Ryan?

  Uh, but like-

• 1:24:08Bill Simmons?

  No question. Like especially with like the big prestige shows.

• 1:24:11Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, where you're just like, you can tell like, oh, all of a sudden... I mean, this is more of like a continuation of the character, but for instance, like Jesse Pinkman legendarily was not supposed to make it that far in Breaking Bad.

• 1:24:22Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:22Chris Ryan?

  And I think that they re- like, continued to iterate his character.

• 1:24:27Bill Simmons?

  I don't know if you have a Stranger Things example you want to give us for 12 hours?

• 1:24:30Speaker 02

  The charac- I mean, Maya Hawke was like a good, well-written character for that first season she was in, and then they kind of just like reduced her to saying punchlines.

• 1:24:38Chris Ryan?

  Or just explaining what the hell was going on all the time.

• 1:24:40Speaker 02

  She just became like the, "Uh, he's right behind me, isn't he?" person for like the last two seasons.

• 1:24:45Bill Simmons?

  Did she help bring down Velcro?

• 1:24:48Speaker 02

  Vecna, yeah. They all did, all 12 of them.

• 1:24:50Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Bo Pollock from Albany.

• 1:24:53Chris Ryan?

  Velcro? We have two Bo's?

• 1:24:56Bill Simmons?

  Bob Pollock, I'm sorry. "As the credits roll in the classic film-"

• 1:25:00Chris Ryan?

  Two guys from Albany?

• 1:25:03Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, that is weird. "As the credits begin to roll in the classic film Roadhouse, Dalton sprints naked across the lawn and dives into the pond with an also-naked Kelly Lynch."

• 1:25:12Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:12Bill Simmons?

  "I've seen Roadhouse a million times, but only recently noticed a third person sitting in the grass."

• 1:25:19Bill Simmons?

  skinny dipping.

• 1:25:21Chris Ryan?

  Sure photo.

• 1:25:21Bill Simmons?

  After rewinding and slowing down the replay several times, my best guess is it's Jeff Healey from the Double Deuce Band, The Blind Musician.

• 1:25:29Chris Ryan?

  Oh.

• 1:25:29Bill Simmons?

  If this is true, what level of awkward, inappropriate, insane is it that Dalton and Doc are not just nude, but clearly about to have sex in front of a blind man sitting on the shore? Where's this Rick and out of nowhere, what the hell minor details?

• 1:25:43Chris Ryan?

  So do you think that that scene is from like the middle of the movie and they just cut it and repurposed it as like a credit sequence?

• 1:25:49Bill Simmons?

  We're gonna have to for social media, go find the end of that clip and cut it over.

• 1:25:53Chris Ryan?

  That's the fucking funniest thing I've ever heard is just cause like you could make the argument that with the skinny dip, it's like, it's not gonna make a difference to this guy.

• 1:26:01Speaker 02

  Yeah, but I mean, his ears still work.

• 1:26:05Bill Simmons?

  She's like, he's right there. It's like, he's fine. He can't see.

• 1:26:09Speaker 02

  What a pull. What a by this guy.

• 1:26:11Bill Simmons?

  Pretty good. TJ Zerbonia writes in the morning after their crazy hangover night, they go to the best little chapel and they meet Eddie. Before they leave, he says, Stu ordered the deluxe package and brings out multiple boxes of merchandise branded with their wedding pictures. In what world am I supposed to believe Eddie has access to a print fulfillment merchandise center that can fill an order that fast? They get married at 3 a.m. They're back 2 p.m. latest. There's no way I'd be ready to pick up. Even if Eddie does all his printing in-house, there's still no way to have all that merchandise done that quick. And if you do it yourself, why would a wedding chapel have the world's quickest fulfillment center sitting in the back? It would be made way more profitable than marrying drunk people.

• 1:26:53Bill Simmons?

  Made me think, do we need a category in picking nits called the mega nitpick? Like a nitpick that just is almost like the whammy of the category?

• 1:27:02Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:02Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, it's like such a nitpick.

• 1:27:04Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:04Bill Simmons?

  It almost has to be addressed.

• 1:27:06Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:07Bill Simmons?

  The mega knit?

• 1:27:08Chris Ryan?

  Sure, the mega knit.

• 1:27:09Bill Simmons?

  This is pretty good. How does he get all those photos ready in seven hours?

• 1:27:13Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, it's a great call.

• 1:27:14Bill Simmons?

  I mean, there's other problems with that movie, including how do they get a tiger into the room and?

• 1:27:18Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:19Bill Simmons?

  How did they get the tiger away from Mike Tyson's house and how did all this stuff happen in five hours?

• 1:27:23Chris Ryan?

  And also like just like Justin Bartha being on the roof.

• 1:27:25Bill Simmons?

  They not realize who's on the roof.

• 1:27:26Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, it would just the security door would have been cracked.

• 1:27:29Bill Simmons?

  There's a lot of nitpicks in this movie, but I thought that was pretty good.

• 1:27:33Bill Simmons?

  Mac, good work, guys, he says. Listen to almost every show. Bill's lying about the worst position in Discover Your Wife cheating in almost caused a 10-car pileup for me.

• 1:27:45Bill Simmons?

  I've seen a heap of movies I otherwise would not have watched because of the show.

• 1:27:48Chris Ryan?

  Was that from Internal Affairs? What was that from?

• 1:27:52Bill Simmons?

  Wasn't it like Doggy Style?

• 1:27:53Chris Ryan?

  No, but what was the movie we were talking about that you you broke that out?

• 1:27:58Bill Simmons?

  Body Double.

• 1:27:59Chris Ryan?

  Body Double.

• 1:28:00Bill Simmons?

  He walked in on the girl riding some guy in this better. And I was like, easily, I thought, I said Doggy Style would probably be worse.

• 1:28:09Chris Ryan?

  I think I may have said.

• 1:28:09Bill Simmons?

  Number two.

• 1:28:10Chris Ryan?

  Doggy Style, but the guys wearing a T-shirt.

• 1:28:15Chris Ryan?

  And if I didn't, that's I'd like to say it now. Cause I was thinking about like Billy Bob always wears a T-shirt landing.

• 1:28:25Bill Simmons?

  Cause he's 70.

• 1:28:26Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:27Bill Simmons?

  Well, Mac wants to suggest the new category called Dorfler's Door. For Midnight Run, named after the scene where Marvin lays Jack out with the driver's door. The category is on a scale of one to 10. How much would that stunt punch kick whatever have hurt in real life? He thinks Dorfler's Door is a nine.

• 1:28:44Chris Ryan?

  Mm hmm.

• 1:28:45Bill Simmons?

  I thought this was great.

• 1:28:46Chris Ryan?

  Any bar fight scene in a movie would just be guys dying on the on the floor.

• 1:28:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, we could do like which stunts would kill you.

• 1:28:54Chris Ryan?

  The amount of times guys get hit with chairs or bar stools.

• 1:28:57Speaker 02

  For sure.

• 1:28:58Chris Ryan?

  Or like fall through tables and then get like glassed.

• 1:29:01Bill Simmons?

  Well, even Beverly Hills Cop, they throw Axel through the window.

• 1:29:03Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:04Bill Simmons?

  When he's Victor, visiting Victor Maitland.

• 1:29:06Speaker 02

  There's a lot of people getting thrown through walls.

• 1:29:07Bill Simmons?

  Put you in the hospital.

• 1:29:08Chris Ryan?

  I actually, I don't even, I mean, I would have to see if Jackass has done this. I just getting thrown through a window seems like the fucking worst thing in the whole world.

• 1:29:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:29:15Chris Ryan?

  Cause then you just also land on a pile of glass.

• 1:29:18Bill Simmons?

  I like this as a flex. I think the the daughter in Hereditary is probably a 15 out of 10. The decapitation, that's probably the highest ceiling.

• 1:29:28Chris Ryan?

  But that actually.

• 1:29:29Speaker 02

  You do die.

• 1:29:30Chris Ryan?

  She does get injured.

• 1:29:30Speaker 02

  You have to pick somebody who lives.

• 1:29:31Chris Ryan?

  It's gotta be like you get like hit with a car door and then you're like, oh, my jaw hurts.

• 1:29:35Bill Simmons?

  She lived, right? Good point. She didn't have a head anymore.

• 1:29:37Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:37Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:29:38Chris Ryan?

  That's right.

• 1:29:39Bill Simmons?

  Dorfler's Door is good, though. Reggie Hammond too with Luther. When he slams the door into Luther as Luther's running Luther.

• 1:29:46Speaker 02

  It's like whenever there's a movie where like a guy gets hit in the back of the head with like a frying pan, you're like, that guy might die.

• 1:29:50Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:51Speaker 02

  You can't serve.

• 1:29:51Chris Ryan?

  Everything, everything that the guys go through in Home Alone.

• 1:29:54Speaker 02

  Oh, my God, the paint cans swinging down? Yeah, the bricks.

• 1:29:59Bill Simmons?

  Dave Brown, big fan since 2017. Recently watched Ennui Thieves for the redot.

• 1:30:07Bill Simmons?

  Said we discussed the lady eating the day's old Chinese food, saying it's not that bad. I'm pretty sure that lady was in London at the bar at the end of the movie. My takeaway is she was on Ice Cube's crew, Ice Cube Junior's crew, and that's how we knew she wrote her Chinese that day and was involved in the escape.

• 1:30:22Chris Ryan?

  Oh, interesting.

• 1:30:23Bill Simmons?

  My next rewatch.

• 1:30:24Chris Ryan?

  I think, I think he's probably right. I think there's a bunch of like, random guys or, yeah.

• 1:30:29Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:30Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:31Bill Simmons?

  Justin from DC, huge fan of The Ringer and the rewatchable since its inception. He has some categories for us, including the Ben Affleck, what the fuck was I thinking word for the actor or actress that retroactively regretted signing on for the movie you're watching? Like Ben and Glee, Bruce Willis and Korn. The problem is, we don't do a lot of these movies. And I like the spirit of it. He wants us to just really do the Hans Gruber scale for every bad guy, which we've done in multiple ones.

• 1:30:57Chris Ryan?

  So this is just like-

• 1:30:58Bill Simmons?

  Colin and I do this.

• 1:30:58Chris Ryan?

  The paycheck movie, essentially, this is like the- I think it would be more just like, huge mistake, you know, like, like, it took me a while to shake that one off, yeah.

• 1:31:07Bill Simmons?

  Well, the Hans Gruber scale, we should just do. I mean, anytime there's a villain, Hans is a 10. The Tom Cruise Award, did this movie need a running scene? And it feels like a reach. The Chris Coughlin Award, named after Blake Lively in The Town for Would You Throw It All Away For This Woman? He lists Angelina Jolie, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, Margot Robbie, Wolf of Wall Street, Neil Long and The Best Man, and then CR would have Edie Falco and Coughlin.

• 1:31:31Chris Ryan?

  And Ashley Judd and Heath.

• 1:31:32Bill Simmons?

  And Ashley Judd and Heath. The Chris Coughlin Award, who should that award be named after? I like the idea of a I Would Throw My Life Away For This Award, for this lady award. The Edie Falco is probably the funniest.

• 1:31:44Chris Ryan?

  I just think it's like a deep pull, but yeah.

• 1:31:47Bill Simmons?

  Blake Lively is good, though.

• 1:31:50Chris Ryan?

  I still remember coming out of the Coughlin rewatchables and just be like, that was our best episode ever. You guys are just like-

• 1:31:57Bill Simmons?

  We peaked.

• 1:31:58Chris Ryan?

  Alright.

• 1:31:59Bill Simmons?

  The Chris Coughlin Award.

• 1:32:01Chris Ryan?

  Yeah. Mila Kunis and forgetting Sarah Marshall would be mine.

• 1:32:05Bill Simmons?

  That's a great one.

• 1:32:05Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:32:06Bill Simmons?

  She was so, so great.

• 1:32:07Chris Ryan?

  But the thing is, is that I just want to say, there's gotta be an edge of danger to it.

• 1:32:12Bill Simmons?

  It's like, she's gonna fuck your life up.

• 1:32:14Speaker 02

  Like Rebecca Dimornay, Risky Business.

• 1:32:16Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:32:16Chris Ryan?

  It's a huge mistake. You know it.

• 1:32:18Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:32:18Chris Ryan?

  But, like, Edie Falco chain smoking with explosives in a duffel bag, but you're like, whatever you want to do next.

• 1:32:27Bill Simmons?

  It's a good one. Or Linda Fiorentino in After Hours was another one.

• 1:32:30Chris Ryan?

  Yes, come on, yeah.

• 1:32:31Bill Simmons?

  We'll come up with the right version, but we're adding some sort of a throw your life away.

• 1:32:34Speaker 02

  Alicia Vikander as the ex-Machina robot? That's a really good one.

• 1:32:42Bill Simmons?

  This is BCR's favorite email. It's from Zed.

• 1:32:46Bill Simmons?

  I'm gonna guess that's not his real name.

• 1:32:48Chris Ryan?

  Zed is dead?

• 1:32:49Bill Simmons?

  "I work in the set decoration department, and given the nature of my job, I've been thinking of the Leon Vitali Most Fucked Up Day on Set Award, named after Stanley Kubrick's longtime personal assistant. The category could have simple answers based on what we know from the press, like Shelley Duvall doing a million takes in The Shining, but I would also ask deeper questions, like who had to chase down and throw back Tom Cruise's terrible pitches in A Few Good Men? What poor dancing coach had to work with Pacino doing the tango instead of a woman? And most important, who had to keep cleaning Miggs's load off Jodie Foster's face? Heads out to the libs."

• 1:33:27Chris Ryan?

  I think Jodie Foster had the worst day.

• 1:33:29Bill Simmons?

  It would be a category that gives a quick salute to the presumed P.A., customer, prop person, so on, that had to keep on trucking through a tough one.

• 1:33:36Speaker 02

  Worst Day on Set is really good.

• 1:33:37Bill Simmons?

  Worst Day on Set, I think, is, is good. The Leon Vitali, I don't know if that's too deep cut. Maybe the Silence of the Lambs production crew member, I don't know, but there's something there at that.

• 1:33:47Chris Ryan?

  The guy in Seven who had to work with the sloth dude, yeah.

• 1:33:51Bill Simmons?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:33:55Bill Simmons?

  New category from Darren. Vincent Hanna, which actor's performance is better explained by the character being high on cocaine the entire movie? And he suggests Doc Brown in Back to the Future, J.K. Simmons in Whiplash, Tom Cruise in Magnolia, Daniel Day-Lorance in There Will Be Blood. And then he said John Heard in Big. This guy was a little too amped up for those sales meetings. He's making $450K a year for churning out some useless product design. Of course he was doing blow. Why wasn't Tom Hanks pulling in the room and offering some at one point?

• 1:34:27Bill Simmons?

  I mean, it's another heat category.

• 1:34:28Chris Ryan?

  It's also funny if you just apply that to people that they're clearly not on cocaine.

• 1:34:34Bill Simmons?

  Better than coffee. So I'm gonna skip a couple here. Ah, this one's pretty funny, though. Philip Sanford said in 2010, he was dating a girl, had strong feelings on moral righteousness. It didn't work out. One of the reasons it didn't work out was she was trying to rent The Devil Wears Prada on her cable bundle VOD service, and next then they ordered the porn parody, The Devil Wears Nada.

• 1:35:00Speaker 02

  Did she watch it?

• 1:35:01Bill Simmons?

  No, she got upset that he got upset, and they ended up breaking up, and he's not married to her anymore. He just wanted to.

• 1:35:06Speaker 02

  They were married?

• 1:35:07Bill Simmons?

  No, they, they were dating.

• 1:35:08Speaker 02

  They got broke, they broke up because of that fight?

• 1:35:10Bill Simmons?

  It was one of the reasons, it seems like. Because he wanted to see what The Devil Wears Nada. He thought it was hilarious that she rented Devil Wears Nada, and she didn't think it was funny at all. I see.

• 1:35:17Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 1:35:17Bill Simmons?

  Probably the best then. Yeah, sounds like it was for the best. Fifteen years later, he's still.

• 1:35:21Speaker 02

  I feel like there's more to that story.

• 1:35:22Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:35:23Speaker 02

  She probably came home and he was watching it, but yeah.

• 1:35:26Bill Simmons?

  This is great from Andre B. He has a suggestion for canceled month on the show, because we talked about canceled month. He said, Ricochet, here's my five-word Wikipedia summary. Denzel Washington gets unconsented VD.

• 1:35:41Bill Simmons?

  That actually is the plot of Ricochet. Yeah. They frame him. And then, uh, he said, um, he thinks Ricochet was ghost directed by Brian De Palma. Oh. The Brendan O'Kelly wants Creature Feature Month with Anaconda, Tremors, Lake Placid, and Gremlins. I'd be into that. Travis Swurger wants us to rename the hottest take and take you off the hook.

• 1:36:07Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 1:36:08Bill Simmons?

  Reminding us that Fantasy once had the take that Tracy Lord's could have been Ginger in Casino.

• 1:36:14Speaker 02

  Who's Tracy Lord's?

• 1:36:16Bill Simmons?

  That was a hotter take. Which, who's that? Former porn star. It's a former porn star. Yeah. That's pretty good. I gotta say, I like Sean's take there. I forgot about that, that Casino pie. I liked that take, too. Yeah. That was good. Um, but then he said, bad accents come up on several episodes. Why haven't you ever added the Kevin Costner in 13 Days Terrible Accent Award? Why haven't, why don't we have a bad accent award? Uh. Have we, we never had one, right? No.

• 1:36:41Speaker 02

  You, you do the, sometimes we'll do the bad Boston, you've, you've done the bad Boston accent. But not in general.

• 1:36:47Bill Simmons?

  If it's Boston, we'll talk about it, but generally speaking. So this is named after Costner, right? He's had the most bad accents in movies. Or would you have somebody else?

• 1:36:59Bill Simmons?

  I assume you're referring to JFK, right? Well, Robin Hood, he gave up. Right, after like two seasons. 13 Days, really terrible. I don't know what, he was doing like some sort of JFK accent. Yeah, all these movies are rewatchable. 13 Days isn't, but yeah.

• 1:37:15Bill Simmons?

  And then he said, Nicholas Cage in Captain Corelli's Mandalorian is his apex mountain for bad accents.

• 1:37:23Bill Simmons?

  Craig, you'll like this. This is from NAS, N-A-S, I'm sure that's not his real name. The Kate Beckinsale Award for this movie is only good because she's hot. Serendipity is a great film, it only works because she's attractive. Sure. Put a less attractive actress in there. I don't think we're talking about the movie 24 years later. Do some movies only work because the actor or actress is hot. This is obviously Species is the number one for this. Species, for sure. Tasha Andridge in Species, ultimate example. Yeah. Movie fails. She's basically taking a three-win team that's last in DVOA, taking them to the playoffs. They go like 11 and 6 somehow. 100%. I'm trying to think of other examples. Would you say Can't Hardly Wait is like that? Jennifer Love Hewitt?

• 1:38:03Chris Ryan?

  No, I think that's a pretty solid, like, I think you could have gotten away with that.

• 1:38:07Bill Simmons?

  Couple of different people in there, yeah. What else? Kate Beckinsale's a good one. Yeah.

• 1:38:13Bill Simmons?

  Last fake category award from Chad in Washington. Wants the Diane Keaton Kay Adams Award for Best Actor or Actress in a Poorly Written Character Role, which was always my take on Godfather.

• 1:38:24Bill Simmons?

  The premise here is so flawed. For example, the award could go to Natalie Portman in the Star Wars prequels for Padme Amidala. Yeah, Amidala. I didn't watch that.

• 1:38:39Bill Simmons?

  I do like the concept of great actor or actress, terrible role.

• 1:38:45Chris Ryan?

  Can you think of any other examples? I mean, Kay is not a bad role, but can you think of any other examples of a?

• 1:38:52Bill Simmons?

  He goes away for five years and comes back and she leaves an entire grade of kids. Just gets into the car with them.

• 1:39:00Chris Ryan?

  But I think so much of this is based on you hating her hair.

• 1:39:04Bill Simmons?

  Well, well, the hair in Godfather 3 was the bad hair.

• 1:39:07Chris Ryan?

  But I think it almost is like retroactively affected your appreciation of the character.

• 1:39:09Bill Simmons?

  And is it bad acting, or you just hate the way they wrote the character? I just thought they mangled the character. It's a bad character.

• 1:39:17Bill Simmons?

  You disagree still.

• 1:39:18Chris Ryan?

  That Kay is a bad character?

• 1:39:19Bill Simmons?

  I just don't think it's a well-written character.

• 1:39:21Chris Ryan?

  But it's supposed to be his like one beacon of a life outside the Corleone family. Is this waspy woman from Connecticut or whatever?

• 1:39:29Bill Simmons?

  Okay. You just like Diane Keaton and I do too, and that's fine. We all wanted to see my Kay Adams as a good character. Gets better in Godfather 2.

• 1:39:37Chris Ryan?

  Yes.

• 1:39:37Bill Simmons?

  Godfather 1, Trainwreck.

• 1:39:39Chris Ryan?

  Is her name Kay Adams?

• 1:39:42Chris Ryan?

  Is it?

• 1:39:44Chris Ryan?

  Or did we just keep saying, did you say Kay Adams?

• 1:39:46Bill Simmons?

  She's Kay Corleone. What was her maiden name?

• 1:39:49Chris Ryan?

  I highly doubt it's Kay Adams. You can Google it. It's not Kay.

• 1:39:54Bill Simmons?

  I don't think Kay Adams's name is Kay Adams. I think that's a stage name.

• 1:39:57Speaker 02

  Is it a sports media personality?

• 1:39:59Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:39:59Speaker 02

  Kay Adams.

• 1:40:00Chris Ryan?

  What's her last name Corleone?

• 1:40:02Speaker 02

  Her name is Kay Adams.

• 1:40:03Bill Simmons?

  In the movie.

• 1:40:04Speaker 02

  In Godfather, yes.

• 1:40:04Bill Simmons?

  Kay Adams.

• 1:40:05Speaker 02

  Kay Adams.

• 1:40:05Chris Ryan?

  But do you think Kay Adams, her is a stage name for Michael Corleone?

• 1:40:10Speaker 02

  Absolutely not. Wikipedia has her name as Kay Adams, that sports personality.

• 1:40:15Bill Simmons?

  Okay.

• 1:40:16Speaker 02

  You think that's a stage name? That's a real claim.

• 1:40:20Bill Simmons?

  We're gonna end with some heat questions.

• 1:40:22Chris Ryan?

  Okay.

• 1:40:25Bill Simmons?

  David Y. This has always bugged me. Was Neil like, hey, Wangrow? Michael's never met you, but he'll pick you up in the giant truck outside the food stand five minutes for the heist. Such a careful crew seems ridiculous. We learn later that Nate vouched for Wangrow. Neil never spoke to him. How'd they communicate the details of the plan in Wangrow? Would Wangrow have shot the guard if he'd actually gotten that refill? Maybe he was dehydrated. John in New Hampshire, same thing. Small, important plot point. This is my favorite movie, blah, blah, blah. After reading all the backstory and Neil in the novel and how careful and methodical he was, how did they hire Wangrow? Guy they'd never met before, little and worked surf times with. They don't meet ahead of, vet them, they don't rehearse with them. I don't buy it. It's so out of character for Neil. Makes no sense.

• 1:41:10Bill Simmons?

  What's the sports equivalent? An athlete that makes an isolated decision that dominoes into their eventual downfall. For me, the action is the juice.

• 1:41:18Chris Ryan?

  This is, I think I do have this, which is Nico Harrison only making one phone call about Luca. And it's like, he's gotta keep it tight. He doesn't want any leaks. He doesn't want this to get out. So he only calls Palenka. This is the same thing as Neil being like, I don't want anyone to know about this heist, about this score. So I can't even meet this guy. He's just, Michael's gonna pick him up in a truck.

• 1:41:41Bill Simmons?

  So Anthony Davis is Wangrow?

• 1:41:43Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:48Bill Simmons?

  Wingrove immediately falls apart.

• 1:41:50Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:50Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:51Chris Ryan?

  And also, let's be honest, Neil's personnel management, I mean, he's picking up his getaway driver the morning of the heist.

• 1:41:57Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:58Chris Ryan?

  He's picking a guy out from behind the line at a diner.

• 1:42:01Bill Simmons?

  Starting to wonder if Neil had some holes in his game.

• 1:42:03Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 1:42:03Chris Ryan?

  That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.

• 1:42:06Bill Simmons?

  If the heat's there in 30 seconds, you gotta run. And then he's saving Val Kilmer, but he's running away from the girl that he's, and also like he's going, walking into an airport hotel to kill Wingrove, but the heat's there.

• 1:42:18Chris Ryan?

  Yeah, it's like.

• 1:42:18Bill Simmons?

  He's supposed to be avoiding the heat.

• 1:42:20Chris Ryan?

  He could have called Nate from Tahiti and been like, I'm gonna put $100,000 on Wingrove's head.

• 1:42:27Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:42:28Chris Ryan?

  But he wanted the feeling of it.

• 1:42:30Speaker 02

  I love that you guys talk about this movie like these people are your friends. I can't believe, the names that you throw out, I'm like, wait, who's who now? It's unbelievable.

• 1:42:37Bill Simmons?

  Well, this is the last email from Austin.

• 1:42:41Bill Simmons?

  Hottest take, Chirito is the villain of Heat, not Wingrove.

• 1:42:47Bill Simmons?

  Morally ambiguous Wingrove makes a case for him. Swastika tattoo, just the product of being a white guy doing time in California. Neil definitely has one.

• 1:42:57Chris Ryan?

  Fair.

• 1:42:58Bill Simmons?

  The team betrays Wingrove, not vice versa. All the fucked up shit Wingrove does is out of desperation, knows that he's being hunted. I had to get it on. When I first saw the movie, I definitely thought that guard was trying to make a move. Wingrove made the play he thought was needed at the time. Flips it around. Chirito's workplace bullying before the heist didn't exactly help him stay cool. Trying to wind him and piss him off after a high stress incident, not exactly good guy behavior. Chirito's an instigator. Chirito uses a child as a human shield. His use of the word slick gets the team busted. Action is the juice. Preferring murder and mayhem to wife and plenty of money shows to be a deranged psychotic. Wingrove spends the movie trying to escape. Chirito only wants blood. Think about it.

• 1:43:42Chris Ryan?

  Honestly, pretty good.

• 1:43:44Bill Simmons?

  Pretty good.

• 1:43:44Chris Ryan?

  Some holes in that theory, but like you could make the argument that.

• 1:43:47Bill Simmons?

  I mean, Wingrove does kill.

• 1:43:49Chris Ryan?

  He's also a serial killer on the side.

• 1:43:51Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, he's also a serial killer.

• 1:43:52Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:43:52Bill Simmons?

  That's where the argument falls apart. I do like that Chirito, maybe not a good guy?

• 1:43:57Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:43:57Bill Simmons?

  Chirito, the child is a human shield.

• 1:44:00Chris Ryan?

  I don't think Chirito is supposed to be seen as like a great guy.

• 1:44:02Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:44:03Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:44:04Bill Simmons?

  Well, why do I like him so much?

• 1:44:05Chris Ryan?

  Because he has the coolest lines and like is like the one who seems the most like emotionally committed to being a bank robber.

• 1:44:12Speaker 02

  He loves getting married to the game.

• 1:44:14Bill Simmons?

  I think Child as a human shield is a deal breaker for me with most characters.

• 1:44:17Chris Ryan?

  I'll also say that you could read Heat as Neil is the problem because Neil is the one who's like, I'm out, I'm, I'm doing one more score. He's also the guy who's pushing them hard to keep doing scores.

• 1:44:29Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:44:29Chris Ryan?

  To rack up his bankroll to get out when they're all like, I'm fine, just like every six weeks or so, we do a different kind of deal like it's like, keep it, keep the pace nice and slow.

• 1:44:40Bill Simmons?

  If Torino says, no, let's not take this down, does Neil just walk away?

• 1:44:43Chris Ryan?

  No, I think Neil does it either way.

• 1:44:45Bill Simmons?

  Just gets a new crew.

• 1:44:46Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:44:46Bill Simmons?

  Yeah. Where does he get a new crew?

• 1:44:48Chris Ryan?

  The fucking diner, apparently. He's just like that guy.

• 1:44:52Bill Simmons?

  That guy from juvie.

• 1:44:53Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:44:54Bill Simmons?

  Uh, that's it for rewatchables.

• 1:44:56Speaker 02

  Wait, I have a, I have a new category I want to suggest.

• 1:44:58Bill Simmons?

  Oh, let's hear.

• 1:44:59Speaker 02

  All right. It is the Stanley Tucci in Conclave Award for the actor that takes you out of the movie.

• 1:45:05Chris Ryan?

  Stanley Tucci took you out of Conclave?

• 1:45:07Speaker 02

  Completely.

• 1:45:08Chris Ryan?

  Why?

• 1:45:08Bill Simmons?

  So we had a version of this with the Lena Dunham spawn ranch, but I think this is better.

• 1:45:13Chris Ryan?

  This is better because this, yours was, uh, most jarring, jarring casting.

• 1:45:17Speaker 02

  This is like.

• 1:45:18Bill Simmons?

  This is more like, I can't focus every time I see this person.

• 1:45:21Speaker 02

  I just, I don't buy him as a cardinal. I'm like, I watched this guy make carbonara on Instagram and I just can't, I can't see him as a cardinal in the Vatican. It's just, I'm like, that's Stanley Tucci.

• 1:45:30Bill Simmons?

  You want to see him competing with Meryl Streep for the top title of the fashion magazine?

• 1:45:34Speaker 02

  You can definitely overcast a movie like I even like Mila Kunis in the new Knives Out. I'm like, that's Mila Kunis.

• 1:45:40Chris Ryan?

  Right.

• 1:45:41Speaker 02

  What are we doing here?

• 1:45:41Bill Simmons?

  Do you agree with this?

• 1:45:43Chris Ryan?

  I'm not about Tucci, but there are movies where I'm like, there was one too many guys in this. Like you didn't need somebody this sort of notable to be a minor character.

• 1:45:51Speaker 02

  Yes. Cause I'm like, that's a very famous person who is online constantly. I don't buy it.

• 1:45:57Bill Simmons?

  Do you think being online constantly is eventually a deal breaker for seeing somebody in a movie?

• 1:46:02Chris Ryan?

  For being a cardinal.

• 1:46:05Bill Simmons?

  Well, I feel that way about if like the guy from, what's the Blake Lively, Justin Baldoni movie? What was that called?

• 1:46:13Speaker 02

  It Ends With Us.

• 1:46:14Bill Simmons?

  It Ends With Us, yeah. If I see that guy in any other movie, I'd be like, hey, the Blake Lively lawsuit guy. Like, he can't be a lawyer.

• 1:46:20Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:46:21Bill Simmons?

  Like, he actually probably should sue.

• 1:46:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:46:23Bill Simmons?

  Because I won't be able to kind of emerge from that when I see him.

• 1:46:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, you can have too big of an online presence. It's why, like, you know, Emma Stone and Jennifer Lawrence and Leo, none of those people do that. Because then you can believe them in a movie you're watching.

• 1:46:33Chris Ryan?

  See, there's sometimes, though, that I think it works, like, did you see Civil War?

• 1:46:37Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:46:38Chris Ryan?

  Okay, well, there's Jesse Plemons in Civil War. It almost takes you out of it, but he's so good that it makes the scene even more significant.

• 1:46:45Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm. I understand that, where you're like, oh, wow, if an actor of this level's in this scene, it elevates the movie?

• 1:46:50Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:46:51Speaker 02

  So there is a fine line.

• 1:46:52Bill Simmons?

  What about when it's like Matt Damon in the last 20 minutes of Interstellar?

• 1:46:57Chris Ryan?

  It's longer than that. I mean, he's in like the second half of the movie, yeah.

• 1:47:01Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:47:02Speaker 02

  That's fine with me.

• 1:47:03Chris Ryan?

  I know some people who are distracted by that.

• 1:47:05Speaker 02

  Yeah, but I do believe that's a real thing. And you're like, oh, this is just like a very famous person, like, in a costume right now.

• 1:47:13Bill Simmons?

  I feel that way a little bit about Hank Azaria.

• 1:47:16Chris Ryan?

  The reverse feeling is when you go to a movie and you think somebody is going to be a major star and they get killed earlier in the movie.

• 1:47:21Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah. Yeah.

• 1:47:24Speaker 02

  The Sean Bean Award. Didn't that used to be an award?

• 1:47:28Bill Simmons?

  The Sean Bean, I can't believe you're...

• 1:47:31Speaker 02

  Died too early or something?

• 1:47:31Bill Simmons?

  Didn't make it?

• 1:47:32Chris Ryan?

  Right.

• 1:47:32Bill Simmons?

  We might, that might have been an earlier award.

• 1:47:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:47:34Bill Simmons?

  I'm actually re-watching Game of Thrones in the sauna. It's great. Having a great time.

• 1:47:38Chris Ryan?

  Are you preparing for Night of the Seven Kingdoms, or you're just re-watching Game of Thrones?

• 1:47:41Bill Simmons?

  No, I just like, it's good to be back with the gang.

• 1:47:43Speaker 02

  How long can the iPad last in the sauna?

• 1:47:46Bill Simmons?

  No, I put it outside. I put it outside the door in a chair.

• 1:47:48Chris Ryan?

  And on subtitles or what?

• 1:47:50Bill Simmons?

  No, I just play really loudly.

• 1:47:52Speaker 02

  Through the door?

• 1:47:54Bill Simmons?

  Yeah.

• 1:47:56Chris Ryan?

  That's exactly how Benny up voice intended.

• 1:47:59Bill Simmons?

  No, cuz it's outside. It's an infrared sauna.

• 1:48:03Chris Ryan?

  Okay, wow.

• 1:48:04Bill Simmons?

  It's great. It can last like about 25, 30 minutes. So watching Game of Thrones, it's great cuz it's so hot that everything's going so slow cuz you're just thinking about how you might be dying.

• 1:48:14Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:48:15Bill Simmons?

  So you can actually listen to dialogue. So I actually feel like I know the characters.

• 1:48:18Chris Ryan?

  So you're like getting into it this time?

• 1:48:19Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I'm like, oh, yeah. Oh, hey.

• 1:48:21Chris Ryan?

  Of course.

• 1:48:22Bill Simmons?

  To Robert Baratheon. Oh, yeah.

• 1:48:25Chris Ryan?

  Are you, uh, are you gonna remix some of those categories now?

• 1:48:28Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, I'm gonna probably, there's a couple that probably need to go, right?

• 1:48:32Chris Ryan?

  Yeah.

• 1:48:33Bill Simmons?

  From last year that I think.

• 1:48:34Chris Ryan?

  But are most of these going to be added as possible flexes?

• 1:48:38Bill Simmons?

  Yeah, well, I think the, the two that I think we have to add are the watch party one and the, um, the 100 minutes one.

• 1:48:45Chris Ryan?

  And also the.

• 1:48:46Bill Simmons?

  I like the Horelbeck scale.

• 1:48:47Chris Ryan?

  We have to add the like anti-life lesson.

• 1:48:50Bill Simmons?

  And the anti-life lesson. Those are the three that go in. And then I think we have some more flexes. I, the other thing we really need, people could suggest is more people to do impressions of for the Wayne Jenkins spot. We need a new batch, new batch of blood.

• 1:49:04Chris Ryan?

  Well, maybe we almost take it away and let it organically repopulate, you know, cuz we had like Romo and Collinsworth and Wayne and like a couple of guys. They were just like, they were our friends, you know? And now it's like, we just need to, to re, restack the cabinet.

• 1:49:18Bill Simmons?

  Definitely don't wanna get rid of anytime soon cuz I've been workshopping some Orlovsky and Riddick.

• 1:49:22Chris Ryan?

  Okay.

• 1:49:23Bill Simmons?

  Doing, uh, doing a scene of whatever movie we do. Just talking for two minutes straight.

• 1:49:29Chris Ryan?

  Uh.

• 1:49:30Bill Simmons?

  An F1. Here's the thing about Brad Pitt, the way he's driving. I want you to watch him go around the corners. The kind of torque that this guy could get. Why do you see my easy with?

• 1:49:39Chris Ryan?

  With Dan, I'm, I'm, I'm not. I, I love.

• 1:49:42Bill Simmons?

  Did you watch that game? Or you were, you were traveling that day?

• 1:49:44Chris Ryan?

  I was traveling. I did not watch.

• 1:49:45Bill Simmons?

  You watched that game?

• 1:49:46Chris Ryan?

  I know that you were upset by them talking.

• 1:49:48Bill Simmons?

  I don't like three man booths.

• 1:49:49Chris Ryan?

  No, they're terrible.

• 1:49:50Bill Simmons?

  I've, I've been on that corner for a long, long time.

• 1:49:52Chris Ryan?

  Are you, are you Scott Hanson people? You guys like Scott Hanson? Do you watch Red Zone?

• 1:49:56Bill Simmons?

  I do, but.

• 1:49:57Chris Ryan?

  You don't watch it? You don't like him?

• 1:49:58Bill Simmons?

  I don't put it, I don't put the audio on it.

• 1:50:00Chris Ryan?

  I'm turning on Hanson.

• 1:50:01Bill Simmons?

  Are you?

• 1:50:02Chris Ryan?

  Yeah. He's trying too hard.

• 1:50:04Speaker 02

  Once I saw the behind the scenes, when it's just like him, like the guy in the Truman Show, like hovering over people's shoulders, screaming into their ears, like, you know, walking around, looking at 10 TVs. He tries really hard when he should just let the announcers of the actual game that they're cutting to take over.

• 1:50:20Bill Simmons?

  I couldn't agree more.

• 1:50:21Speaker 02

  I'm trying to remember, I recently was just, he always tries to come in with like a pun.

• 1:50:25Bill Simmons?

  Are you, how you feel about Brady?

• 1:50:29Bill Simmons?

  It's been a rough times. Really? Okay. Brady and St. Bart's with the cellphone light out in his pants, hitting on Alex Earl. I just meant like Brady as a, as a color guy. It's fine. I just think like, Tarrico and Collinsworth were so good on Sunday night. Come on, Brady is not good. Tarrico was incredible. You, and then Buck and Aikman, same thing. And then you watch these other teams and you can't, you're like, whoa.

• 1:50:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:50:53Bill Simmons?

  We really dropped off here. I could talk about this all day. All right, rewatchables. We'll come back with a movie, um, next week. This was fun. Thanks for doing this. Chris Ryan, Craig Corbick, also the producer. Thanks to Gahow and Eduardo as well. Anyone else we want to thank?

• 1:51:06Speaker 02

  Uh, I think that's it.

• 1:51:07Bill Simmons?

  All right. That's good. See you next week in the rewatchables.

• 1:51:22Bill Simmons?

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