131: Listen to This If You Keep Making Excuses

In this episode, I unpack how making excuses quietly kills momentum—and how to break that cycle for good. Sparked by a conversation with a friend who’s been stuck in his own way, I share five tactical ways to stop making excuses and start showing up. We get into preparation, owning your time, and leading from the front—plus practical strategies like backward planning and thinking beyond the now. If you’re ready to stop hiding behind reasons and start taking control, this one’s for you. CHAPTERS 02:15 Setting the Stage: Personal Reflections and Realizations 06:20 The Importance of Time Management 08:09 Ironman Prep: Challenges and Strategies 11:07 Point #1 25:52 Point #2 34:09 Point #3 42:54 Point #4 53:53 Point #5 ORDER MY BOOK HERE: https://www.amazon.com/Go-One-More-Intentional-Life-Changing/dp/1637746210 FOLLOW: Become a BPN member FOR FREE - Unlock 20% off FOR LIFE https://bpn.team/member IG: instagram.com/nickbarefitness/ YT: youtube.com/@nickbarefitness

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:06Nick Bare?

  Hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of the podcast. This episode's working title is, it's a call to action. Listen to this if you keep making excuses.

• 0:24Nick Bare?

  And I've really wanted to dive into this episode and this topic and this discussion. And what sparked this idea is a few weeks ago, I was talking to a really good friend. And this friend has found himself making excuses for an extended period of time. And those excuses have led him and distracted him away from his goals, his purpose, his mission. And the realization was it's because of excuses.

• 1:04Nick Bare?

  Making consistent excuses for weeks and months and years. And eventually, when you keep making excuses and that in itself can become a habit on its own. You habitually make excuses of why you didn't, why you can't, why you won't, why you shouldn't. When that becomes habitual, it turns into this ever revolving wheel of not getting to where you want to be. And there has to be a moment in time, something that happens.

• 1:43Nick Bare?

  Sometimes for better or worse, it makes you realize I have to stop making excuses.

• 1:50Nick Bare?

  And I had a conversation with this friend and during this conversation, I kept thinking to myself, there's probably so many other people who are experiencing this. That could benefit from something, some sort of resource and guide and tool.

• 2:11Nick Bare?

  To help them stop making excuses, and that's what this is. And I want to set some conditions before I dive into these five things I'm going to talk about. Because I myself am not immune to making excuses. I am tempted daily to make excuses very frequently. We all are. We are all tempted to make excuses and not do the things that we know we need to do to get to where we want to be. That is the reality of it. No one is immune to that. But the five things I'm going to share are ways and things that I reflect upon

• 2:54Nick Bare?

  and ways that I prepare for when I'm presented in the moment to make an excuse. And here's why these five things are why I don't make that excuse. They guide me to make the right decision. The hard right as opposed to the easy wrong.

• 3:15Nick Bare?

  And I know the things I'm going to share are easier said than done. And we're all in different situations and we all have different circumstances in life.

• 3:27Nick Bare?

  Yes, the, the life that I live

• 3:31Nick Bare?

  might look different than the life that you live. We, we all come from different experiences and backgrounds. We all live 24 hours in a day, but our 24 hours all look different. Based off our responsibilities, our work, what we're going through, hardships, struggles, all of those things. And for me, right now in my life, as many of you know, I'm, I'm the founder and CEO of a growing business that has 45 full-time employees. I'm a husband. I have two young kids. I have a three-year-old daughter and a one-year-old son. I'm training for an Ironman.

• 4:12Nick Bare?

  And I do have a fairly flexible schedule. It's a very full schedule. Very full schedule. I have a lot of responsibilities and commitments, but I have the ability to be somewhat flexible with that schedule. For example, I'm training for an Ironman right now. And the content that we produce as I'm training for and preparing for Ironman Arizona, November 16th, I can train and we can film. And it is part of my job to do during the work day. So when I leave at the end of the day, I don't have to train again. I can go spend time with the family. I am very grateful for that opportunity and that ability.

• 4:57Nick Bare?

  But the reality is that I have worked for a long period of time to get to that ability. And in that process, I didn't make the excuses so that I could be in this position one day. But I recognize, I truly do, that there are certain things that I can do in my life that you might not be able to do in your life. And it goes vice versa. We all are pursuing these big ambitious goals. And what is hard is relative. We all have different responsibilities. We all have different challenges that we're trying to overcome.

• 5:38Nick Bare?

  What's easy for you, maybe hard for me. And what's easy for me, maybe hard for you. It goes both ways. So I don't want you to listen to these five things, and this is why I'm sharing this. These five things that I'm sharing and say, "Yeah, it must be nice." But Nick, you have this type of schedule. You have this type of job. You live this type of lifestyle. Yes, that is true. But we can say that for anyone. But these five things that I'm sharing are applicable regardless of the job that you have, the lifestyle that you live, and what you're working towards.

• 6:20Nick Bare?

  The reality is the clock is ticking. Every single day and it doesn't stop ticking. From the moment you are born to the moment that we die. That clock starts and it ends. For our time being present. On earth.

• 6:43Nick Bare?

  In this world.

• 6:47Nick Bare?

  And at this chapter of my life. My kids are young. My family is growing. And I don't want to miss any of it.

• 6:59Nick Bare?

  I've set out to achieve. Certain accomplishments in my life. And experiences that I want to be able to live presently with my family. And in order to do all of those things. I can't afford. To make excuses. You can't afford. To make excuses. None of us can. If we value time, which is a limited resource. This is nothing new. We all know this. Time is a limited resource. That clock, like I said, it starts when we're born, it ends when we die. And we have limited time on earth to accomplish the things that we want to accomplish.

• 7:41Nick Bare?

  Experience the, the things that we want to experience. Spend the time with the people that we want to spend time with. Achieve, accomplish, create and build legacy. And in order to do those things and experience life.

• 8:01Nick Bare?

  We, I, us. We cannot afford to make excuses.

• 8:09Nick Bare?

  Right now, I'm in an Ironman prep. I'm in my third week of this prep. It's an 18 week. Prep total. So I'm about 16 weeks out right now.

• 8:23Nick Bare?

  And I said before this entire prep started that it would look different than my previous fitness preps have have looked, especially in Ironman prep. The reason being is that preparing for an Ironman triathlon is extremely time demanding. I will be training at the peak roughly 22 hours a week at the peak of training. What I'm realizing going into this third week of prep, and the reason I said before this prep started that this fitness endeavor would look different than the previous ones is because my life looks different. My life responsibilities,

• 9:05Nick Bare?

  my business responsibilities, my family, every part of my life looks different now than it did in 2019, 2020, 2021. Before we had kids, before our family started growing, and before the business was at this scale and caliber that it is today. And what I'm realizing in this prep so far is that those things that I identified three weeks ago are very true. I haven't been challenged like this in a long time in terms of time management. I am saying no to more things than I ever had

• 9:43Nick Bare?

  before. And if it doesn't impact my business and the team, my family, the time I spend with my family, the present time I spend with my family, and the Ironman prep itself and the series that we were filming, I am saying no to pretty much everything else. I am being ruthless with my time right now because I have to.

• 10:14Nick Bare?

  I am extremely focused and intentional with everything I'm doing.

• 10:19Nick Bare?

  And I haven't said, like I said, no to this many things, potentially ever. And I'm realizing how many things I usually say yes to that I probably shouldn't say yes to. If I value my time and I want to get to where I want to be with the people that I want to be with, accomplishing the things and living a life that is impactful and meaningful.

• 10:48Nick Bare?

  There are certain periods of time in your life where you have to be ruthless with what you say yes to, but more importantly, what you say no to, to stop making excuses.

• 11:01Nick Bare?

  So the five things that I want to share

• 11:05Nick Bare?

  kickoff right now, and like I said, these are things that you can write down, that you can reflect on, that you can implement to stop making excuses.

• 11:17Nick Bare?

  Right after you finish listening to this episode. The first, and they are in no particular order, but I feel very confident about this one. This is one that I've been thinking on for a long period of time, years.

• 11:34Nick Bare?

  The first is to stop spending time negotiating with yourself.

• 11:41Nick Bare?

  I used to do this. And I used to spend

• 11:46Nick Bare?

  an unwanted amount of time negotiating with myself to either do or not to do. It's a wasted time, first off.

• 11:58Nick Bare?

  We sometimes find ourselves in this situation or this position where there's something we know we're supposed to do. We know there's something that we need to do, but we question it because we don't want to. We place the want over the need.

• 12:17Nick Bare?

  Don't allow yourself the option. Don't allow yourself the option to negotiate with yourself.

• 12:27Nick Bare?

  Because every decision we make compounds over time, just like compounding interest in financial investments.

• 12:35Nick Bare?

  I recorded an episode about this a few weeks ago, "The Power of Decision."

• 12:42Nick Bare?

  And I believe that we go through our day, in any given day, where we are faced with and presented with the opportunity to make all these different decisions. And at face value, they don't seem significant or valuable in any way. But the reality is, they all are. Every decision we have to make is meaningful and it leads to where we end up one day. The small, the big, the hard, the easy. And I truly do believe that every decision should be weighed more heavily than we probably do weigh it right now in this given time.

• 13:28Nick Bare?

  Because decisions compound over time. It's like a snowball effect. When you make more of the right decisions

• 13:37Nick Bare?

  that are driven with intentionality and clarity, that compounds and grows and grows and grows. If you make more wrong decisions or bad decisions than good decisions, that also compounds, but in the opposite direction. Where you lose progress

• 13:58Nick Bare?

  and it sends you into failure and mistake and in an unfortunate circumstance and situation. But then if you find yourself in a place where you're making equally good decisions as bad decisions, you just maintain the status quo. You don't really digress or improve. You're just there, doing exactly what you're doing previously or what you're doing right now.

• 14:31Nick Bare?

  I believe that the decisions you make earlier on in the day, that sets the foundation for the rest of your day. That's one of the reasons that I run every single morning, regardless if I want to or not.

• 14:49Nick Bare?

  And a

• 14:54Nick Bare?

  a, a practice that you can implement to hold yourself accountable to this, to stop negotiating with yourself is to write down what you're going to do the next day, the night or day prior, and commit to honoring your commitments the next day.

• 15:13Nick Bare?

  I love that word honor, honor your commitments.

• 15:19Nick Bare?

  Like if today is Monday,

• 15:22Nick Bare?

  and there's things that you know you're supposed to do tomorrow.

• 15:28Nick Bare?

  And today, the day prior, it's really easy to say, well, I'm going to do these things tomorrow. But then when you wake up Tuesday morning, and now that, that thing is in front of you that you know you are supposed to do, it's really easy to say, I'm not going to do this. I'm gonna, I'm gonna push it back one day or the next day. So practice, on Monday,

• 15:52Nick Bare?

  or Sunday, or Saturday, or whatever day it is, write down on a piece of paper or, or in your phone, here's the things I'm going to accomplish and do tomorrow. These are my commitments. And come the next day, I am now going to commit to honoring these commitments. It's a great way to just hold yourself accountable. Again, what needs to be done compared to what you want to do? Don't allow yourself to negotiate with yourself. Stop spending time negotiating with yourself of what you want to do, or should do, but don't want to do. So here's an example, I have a few examples, actually.

• 16:38Nick Bare?

  Last week, being week two into Ironman prep, every Wednesday morning, I have my speed workouts, my running speed workouts. And that rotates every other week between a tempo workout. So an example of that would be this week, it's 10 miles total of volume. It is a two mile warm up. It is six one mile repeats with two minutes of rest in between each, and then two mile cooldown. So it's 10 miles total volume. So it rotates between tempo and track being critical velocity. This week is tempo, last week was critical velocity.

• 17:24Nick Bare?

  So I woke up Wednesday morning, being about 10 days into Ironman prep, and I woke up sore. I woke up sore, I woke up fatigued, you know, just getting back into triathlon prep, managing about 60 miles of running a week. I think last week on the bike, I rode 130 miles, and then multiple swims a week. That fatigue just starts to compound. And you really start to feel it. The deeper we get into prep, my body will acclimate to that volume and that training stimulus, and it'll become more efficient at recovering appropriately. But right now, being so early into it, I am feeling the fatigue. I am feeling the beat down, truly.

• 18:11Nick Bare?

  Last Wednesday morning, I woke up sore and tired. The last thing I wanted to do was the workout I had scheduled that day. I had 10 800 meter repeats. Now, one of the things that I do to hold myself accountable the day prior to a big speed workout, is I will go into my Garmin app, and I will input the workout for that next day. So when I pull up my, my watch, the morning of that next day's run, and I get to start a new workout, it'll show me the workout that is scheduled. And programmed for that morning. So it's really hard for me to bypass that, especially once I start it. Yeah, literally in my, my Garmin app,

• 18:57Nick Bare?

  uh, we'll program two and a half mile warmup, 10 times 800 meter repeat with 60 seconds rest in between, two and a half mile cooldown and the watch will walk me through the workout. I can't exit it. I have to, I have to go through it. That's one way that I hold myself accountable. But when I woke up Wednesday,

• 19:18Nick Bare?

  the last thing I want to do, like I said, was 10 800 meter repeats. I knew my legs were going to be heavy. I knew I was going to be carrying fatigue. I knew I was going to be tired. And I started to negotiate with myself. There I was Wednesday morning, just ate my go bar, just consumed my two scoops of, of G1M Sport. And I was sitting there in the kitchen, negotiating with myself. And I was thinking to myself, you know what? I am sore. I am tired. Maybe I'll just push this workout to tomorrow, being Thursday, or maybe I'll push it to Friday. Then as I started thinking, well,

• 20:00Nick Bare?

  I already have my training scheduled for Thursday. I already have my training scheduled for Friday. I have these meetings that I have to work around. And if I push it back a day, it's getting closer to my Saturday long run, which will affect my, my long run performance Saturday. Or maybe I can move my long run Saturday to Sunday to give myself some more time. I started going through all of these negotiating tactics with myself

• 20:27Nick Bare?

  for why I shouldn't do the workout that morning, the one that I had scheduled, the one that I had programmed into my watch, the one that I had into my Training Peaks pro, training program. And I was thinking of every way possible to not do this workout.

• 20:46Nick Bare?

  And then it just hit me. What am I doing? I'm wasting time. Why am I spending all this time negotiating with myself of why I shouldn't do what I know I need to do? Because I want a morning of comfort and ease. And I don't want to feel the pain. I don't want to feel the discomfort. That's probably exactly what I need. I need to lean in, stop negotiating with myself, stop making excuses and just do what I said I was going to do. I wasted five to 10 minutes that morning that I could have spent doing something else or working on something else.

• 21:31Nick Bare?

  I wasted five to 10 minutes trying to negotiate with myself of why I shouldn't, why I couldn't, and how I can make it work.

• 21:42Nick Bare?

  I wasn't willing to honor my commitment initially until I realized what I was doing. I was negotiating with myself. So I decided to honor my commitment.

• 21:56Nick Bare?

  I went out in the garage, put my shoes on, still didn't want to do the workout, started my watch, and just did it.

• 22:05Nick Bare?

  Just didn't give myself the option to negotiate with what I said I was gonna do.

• 22:13Nick Bare?

  Another example of that.

• 22:16Nick Bare?

  I was in my, um, my long run this past weekend. It was a 15 mile, mile run.

• 22:26Nick Bare?

  And in that run, I was just thinking about how powerful the mind was, or is.

• 22:35Nick Bare?

  The only reason we're talking about excuses in, in this context, it's not because of physical inability, it's because of emotional and mental inability or instability. It's a, it's a mind warfare as opposed to a physical warfare.

• 22:59Nick Bare?

  And I was midway through that run, I was eight miles into my 15 mile run.

• 23:04Nick Bare?

  And I was thinking, in the middle of that.

• 23:12Nick Bare?

  I could just stop right now if I wanted. Eight miles is a solid run. I'm not gonna stop. I'm gonna finish the 15 miles because I said I was gonna finish the 15 miles. I fueled up and I started that morning knowing I was gonna run 15 miles. But it's so easy that when you're in it, you can just stop if you want. If you truly want, the mind is that powerful? Or should I say un-powerful? Where we can decide to stop midway through if you really wanted to. And so many people do.

• 23:55Nick Bare?

  So many people quit midway through. I believe it's much easier. Or should I say it's much harder to get started than it is to keep going. That 800 meter workout that I did that week, last week. It was much harder to get started. But once I got started, there was no option. There was no thought of stopping midway through. Sometimes you just have to stop negotiating with yourself to get started.

• 24:37Nick Bare?

  And once you get started, hold that momentum. One of my favorite quotes that I heard from Chad Wright. It is he said, "Don't quit in the chair. Don't quit in the middle." Quit because, and this was in context of an ultra marathon. When you are running an ultra marathon, you come in to a checkpoint. You sit down in the chair to get some food, to recover for a few minutes, to change out your shoes. That's a rest, that's a reset. Don't allow yourself to quit in that moment. Don't quit in the middle. Quit when it's done.

• 25:21Nick Bare?

  Quit when you finish. Quit when your body forces you to stop. But don't let your mind win. Don't quit in the chair.

• 25:33Nick Bare?

  Finish, once you cross that line, when you finish that workout, when you said, or when you do what you said you were gonna do. Stop spending time negotiating with yourself. Number two, consider what you lose, not necessarily what you gain. This is a mindset shift. It's just a different way to, to look at the decision-making process when you want to

• 26:15Nick Bare?

  interface with the opportunity to make an excuse. If you end up making an excuse to not do something, we think of, "Well, if I don't do this, I don't gain X." If I, if I don't do this workout today, if I don't honor this commitment of, of doing what I said I was gonna do, I just don't gain the incremental value from what I was going to go do. If, if I don't go do this workout, this 10x800 meter workout, the only thing that happens

• 27:00Nick Bare?

  is that I don't gain more fitness. But I would, I would argue and encourage you to think of it in a different way, which is why I say it's a mindset shift. If I don't go and, and do this workout that I said I was gonna do, and honor the commitment that I wrote down and put out there and said that I was going to accomplish, it's not about the gain, it's, it's about the loss. You lose the ability to fulfill your potential. And I know that's, that's thrown out in so many different ways and circumstances.

• 27:44Nick Bare?

  It's all about fulfilling potential, but what does this potential actually look like?

• 27:51Nick Bare?

  Potential is what we can accomplish, who we can become, the impact that we can create from the time we are born

• 28:04Nick Bare?

  to the time that we die.

• 28:07Nick Bare?

  As I've already mentioned, that is a finite amount of time. And from the moment we are born, that clock starts ticking.

• 28:16Nick Bare?

  And I believe we all have the responsibility and obligation to accomplish as much as we can to fulfill our potential during that finite amount of time. Because if we end up making excuses to not do these things that allow us to fulfill our full potential, we lose. We lose the opportunity, we lose the ability to fulfill that potential.

• 28:48Nick Bare?

  We underperform. Therefore, we underdeliver, not only for ourself, but for the people around us as well.

• 29:03Nick Bare?

  You lose time.

• 29:06Nick Bare?

  Something you can't, we can't buy back. Something that is a limited resource and asset that we get the opportunity and have to spend wisely.

• 29:23Nick Bare?

  That's the reality is by making excuses, it's not that there's things that we don't gain, but there's things that we lose. And the more excuses we make, and the more time passes,

• 29:40Nick Bare?

  the less chances we have to fulfill that full potential. Here's an example.

• 29:50Nick Bare?

  When I was in the Army, which is a full-time job, active-duty infantry officer,

• 29:59Nick Bare?

  stationed at Fort Hood, Texas, here in central Texas, I was active-duty for four years. And during that four years while stationed at Fort Hood, I spent nine months in South Korea, stationed at Camp Casey with the 1st Cav.

• 30:17Nick Bare?

  Before I went into the Army as an active-duty infantry officer, I started BPN, the company that

• 30:28Nick Bare?

  I'm still building and working on today.

• 30:32Nick Bare?

  Obviously, when I started BPN in 2012, we were much smaller. The ceiling, the potential that I visualized was much lower.

• 30:49Nick Bare?

  And I was doing two jobs simultaneously.

• 30:57Nick Bare?

  I would start working on the business on BPN earlier in the morning, and then I would go to Fort Hood and we'd conduct physical training with my platoon. And I would work all day as an infantry platoon leader. And I'd come back at night

• 31:15Nick Bare?

  on days that we weren't training in the field or we had overnight exercises. I'd come back that night and I'd continue working on the business. This was a period of time in my life for four years where I said no to a lot of things outside of my job in the Army and building BPN. I said no to a lot of things.

• 31:40Nick Bare?

  A lot of opportunities, a lot of experiences, which I do not regret and I don't view as sacrifices. I just view as necessary in that moment, during that time, to get to where I wanted to be.

• 31:57Nick Bare?

  If I would have said, "I'll start working on BPN after my time in the Army." That was an option. It was a very valid option, and I don't think anyone would have judged me or thought otherwise if I would have, for those four years, spent all my time working as an infantry battalion leader, and then

• 32:24Nick Bare?

  after work and on the weekends, would have traveled, hung out with friends, visited family,

• 32:33Nick Bare?

  pursued more leisure activities, watched more movies, binged TV shows on Netflix, all of those things, as many of my peers did, which I don't say as a negative, it's just, I chose a different path and option. I decided to spend my spare and free time in a different way and committed to a different pursuit. If I would have done that

• 33:03Nick Bare?

  and started working on BPN after my time in the Army, I know for a fact,

• 33:10Nick Bare?

  for a fact, I wouldn't be sitting here today.

• 33:14Nick Bare?

  BPN wouldn't be the size that it is. We wouldn't be creating the impact that we are. I wouldn't have had these opportunities

• 33:26Nick Bare?

  because those four years of time were so necessary and valuable that I would have lost four years of opportunity, experience,

• 33:40Nick Bare?

  work,

• 33:44Nick Bare?

  knowledge, skill.

• 33:48Nick Bare?

  I wouldn't have gained more life experience. I would have lost, actually, lost the ability to set my life up for where it is right now.

• 34:02Nick Bare?

  By making excuses, consider what you lose, not necessarily what you can gain otherwise. The third consideration to stop making excuses is to know and recognize and accept the fact that preparation prevents inability.

• 34:25Nick Bare?

  This is why a big part of my, my book titled Go One More is all about forward thinking and backwards planning. I think this is absolutely critical because when you prepare, you give yourself the chance, you increase the likelihood to succeed and achieve.

• 34:47Nick Bare?

  Lack of preparation is just asking to fail. Lack of preparation is setting yourself up for failure. So much of, of preparation is, is taking a step back, looking into the future. That's why it's called forward thinking, backwards planning. I learned this in the military, but I believe as simple as the concept is, it's a concept that many people don't implement and it's been game changing for me.

• 35:18Nick Bare?

  In this moment, I can forward think about what my day today looks like, what my day tomorrow looks like and what the day after looks like. And then with, with all that consideration, I start planning backwards of what do I need to do today, tomorrow and the next day to be set up for success? How do I need to build my schedule? What do I need to move around? What do I need to cancel? What do I need to reschedule and shift? What foods do I need to prepare and when and why? Based off that, do I need to ask for help? Do I need to order more groceries?

• 36:02Nick Bare?

  Do I need to dedicate and commit some time tonight to preparing some of those meals? Or preparing for a podcast episode based off of moving things around? I am constantly, constantly, if you could see into my brain, it is forward thinking, backwards planning all of the time. Forward thinking, backwards planning, forward thinking, backwards planning.

• 36:26Nick Bare?

  This third consideration will set us up for the next consideration I'm going to bring up. Lack of preparation is the result of excuses, not necessarily lack of resources.

• 36:39Nick Bare?

  Preparation prevents inability. Here's an example.

• 36:45Nick Bare?

  Before diving into this example, I think sometimes we think that things are very hard or challenging. And it's because we make them hard or challenging for ourselves because we don't prepare or plan appropriately.

• 37:01Nick Bare?

  We can make our lives and our goals and our accomplishments actually much easier to achieve with a greater understanding and practice of preparation and planning.

• 37:17Nick Bare?

  So earlier this week, we had a group in town that we work very closely with. And we were in that conference room with that team from 9:00 AM to 4:00 PM.

• 37:33Nick Bare?

  The full day in the conference room.

• 37:36Nick Bare?

  And based off of my goal that I have for Ironman Arizona, November 16th,

• 37:43Nick Bare?

  I had to forward-thinking, backwards plan for that day.

• 37:48Nick Bare?

  So this is a very simple example of how I forward-thinking, how I prepare to not make excuses. So I knew this meeting was coming up for weeks, so I had time to prepare. And I knew I was going to be in this meeting all day in this one conference room. But I wanted to get my training in. So I front-loaded two of my training sessions prior to that meeting.

• 38:19Nick Bare?

  And in order to get two sessions in, two training sessions in before that meeting, and not mess up the schedule and routine of my family, so my wife can work out in the morning, so we can get the kids up, so we can feed them, all of those things, I had to wake up earlier than normal. And waking up earlier than normal had to be done, so I could get my training sessions in, not disrupt the routine of my family, and be at the office to kick off that first meeting at 9:00 a.m.

• 38:50Nick Bare?

  And throughout that entire work session, I had to stay on top of my nutrition to make sure that I was fueling and recovering from previous training sessions and in preparation for upcoming training sessions in the following days. So during bathroom breaks, I would strategically ask for bathroom breaks at times I knew I needed meals. I had all my meals laid out in my office, so I could go right into my office, take a bathroom break, fill up my water, grab a meal, bring it back to the conference room. I hit my macros, I hit my nutrition for that day, and as soon as we get out of that meeting at 4:00 p.m., I had my bike set up in the gym, I walked out of that meeting,

• 39:36Nick Bare?

  put my cycling shorts on, hopped on the bike, knocked out my bike session, went home.

• 39:43Nick Bare?

  I got it all done because I had things prepared and laid out, because I practiced forward thinking and backwards planning. And someone walked up to me during that day, and it was as I was grabbing one of my meals in my office and going back to the conference room to jump back into this meeting, and they stopped me for a brief second, and they said, "I have no excuses." And that comment there is what...

• 40:16Nick Bare?

  Triggered or sparked the, the need for what I believe this podcast can do and help people. They stopped me in that moment and they said, "I have no excuses. I know you're in this meeting all day. I know you're in Ironman prep.

• 40:33Nick Bare?

  I see you walking from the bathroom to fill up your water, to grabbing your meal, to going back into the conference room, and sitting in a meeting and eating your meals that you prepped and planned for. I have no excuses not to hit my nutrition on any given day."

• 40:50Nick Bare?

  And I have been practicing that for so long that it is now habitual. It is part of my routine. Cause I know it's something that I have to do in order to achieve the things that I say I want to achieve and then honor those commitments.

• 41:13Nick Bare?

  Preparation prevents the inability

• 41:20Nick Bare?

  to make excuses and not accomplish the things that we say we want to accomplish.

• 41:28Nick Bare?

  It allows us, gives us the opportunity to actually honor our commitments. Forward think, backwards plan, prepare and plan. Prepare and plan so you don't give yourself the option to make an excuse. Because what would have happened, what would I have lost if I didn't do all that planning and preparing? Probably a few things. One, I wouldn't have gotten the quantity or quality of training sessions that I wanted that day. It's just one day. Yeah, but one day turns into two days and two days turns into three days and three days turns into 10 days and that compounds.

• 42:14Nick Bare?

  The way you do one thing is the way you do everything. But it's just one day. Yeah, it's one day.

• 42:21Nick Bare?

  Today is an opportunity for me to be stressed and tested and stay on track.

• 42:28Nick Bare?

  I would have missed out on, like I said, the quantity and quality of training session. I would have fell behind on my nutrition, which would have hurt my recovery and would have affected my fueling for the upcoming days in training sessions. And I would have fell behind, all because I lacked the intentionality of preparing and planning. Number four, manage your time appropriately.

• 43:01Nick Bare?

  This sounds like common sense, and I believe it is. But Steph and I were having this conversation a few weeks ago. And I believe, truthfully, the number one most important trait of highly successful people who accomplish and achieve, whether that's individuals, teams, businesses, organizations, is that they are extremely efficient and effective at managing their time appropriately. And there's levels to this kind of stuff.

• 43:46Nick Bare?

  I believe it's one of my strengths. I manage my time very appropriately. And I'm very consistent with the way that I manage my time very appropriately, which allows me to do a lot of different things.

• 44:03Nick Bare?

  But in order to manage your time appropriately, you have to be willing to say no to 99 things, so you can say yes to the one thing and the one thing that matters.

• 44:18Nick Bare?

  If it really matters to you, you will make time. It's another section of my book. And that is something that I shared for the first time, I believe, about a year ago. And it resonated and connected with a lot of people. If it matters to you, you will make time.

• 44:41Nick Bare?

  But you've got to figure out what really matters to you first.

• 44:48Nick Bare?

  There are fewer things that really matter than you maybe spending your time on.

• 44:56Nick Bare?

  And that's another practice that I believe we should all go through. And I've had to do multiple different times throughout different chapters and seasons of my life is

• 45:10Nick Bare?

  do an actual audit. I get a piece of paper out and write down what actually matters to me.

• 45:20Nick Bare?

  That's what I've had to do in this season of of life right now for the next four months. What really matters? My family matters? My family will always be number one priority, always.

• 45:35Nick Bare?

  My business, my team, the people, our mission, that matters. And this Ironman prep matters.

• 45:47Nick Bare?

  Just like I've talked about so many times over these last couple of months, the importance of having a vision. And vision is is broken up into three components being core values, purpose, and goals.

• 46:06Nick Bare?

  If you define, you clearly define your vision for your life, or a season and chapter of life that you're in, your core values and your purpose

• 46:18Nick Bare?

  probably shouldn't change throughout your lifetime, unless there's some sort of very significant

• 46:27Nick Bare?

  altering to your core values and purpose, hopefully for the better, not the worse. But goals can be short, medium, and long-term targets.

• 46:40Nick Bare?

  Those goals are the things that matter what you're trying to accomplish.

• 46:46Nick Bare?

  And when you're presented with a decision or an opportunity, and you then go reference that clearly defined vision, core values, purpose and goals. If it doesn't align with or fit any of that vision, or the things that you say do matter to you, it's a very easy and consistent no.

• 47:08Nick Bare?

  No, I'm sorry, but no. No, that doesn't align with what I want to accomplish or what I'm trying to do right now. No, I'm sorry, but that doesn't

• 47:19Nick Bare?

  truly matter to me right now.

• 47:23Nick Bare?

  Sometimes it feels bad and it's hard to say no to people. But we have to be able to say no to people in certain situations and circumstances. It's not like this blanket no all the time. There's, there's definitely

• 47:43Nick Bare?

  exceptions to that rule. But we have to be able to say no to a lot of things and opportunities and experiences.

• 47:53Nick Bare?

  So that we can say yes to the things that truly do matter in that moment.

• 47:59Nick Bare?

  But I believe that is the number one trait of highly successful people.

• 48:06Nick Bare?

  They say no to so many things so they can say yes to the things that really do matter. I was thinking about examples of this. And because I'm in this really, I don't say busy season, but a very focused season right now.

• 48:27Nick Bare?

  When I go into a prep, especially a big prep like an Ironman, and we do a full series around it. I mean, right now we have three creatives and videographers and editors working on this entire series. It's a huge undertaking.

• 48:44Nick Bare?

  From all the filming and all the editing and all of the production, it's a really big project for us. And it requires a lot of focus and a lot of work.

• 48:58Nick Bare?

  And I haven't gone into a prep or a YouTube series, a content series of this level for a few years.

• 49:07Nick Bare?

  So I'm learning all of these new things again that I haven't had to go through or I haven't been challenged with for quite some time.

• 49:17Nick Bare?

  And I'm realizing how much I'm saying no to right now and how hard it is to manage time appropriately when time is demanding, energy is demanding, and there's a lot of responsibilities personally and professionally.

• 49:39Nick Bare?

  So in the last week, there's been about 30 people.

• 49:45Nick Bare?

  And I'd say that's the, that's lowballing it.

• 49:50Nick Bare?

  There's been at least 30 people who have asked for 15 to 20 minutes of time in a week, just last week.

• 50:03Nick Bare?

  And this comes from email requests or friends who just want to catch up,

• 50:13Nick Bare?

  DMs on social media,

• 50:18Nick Bare?

  mentors, coaches, all of these things. People reach out just asking for time.

• 50:27Nick Bare?

  Time is something you have to protect, especially if you're trying to accomplish a big goal during that time.

• 50:37Nick Bare?

  So what I've found is when people ask for 15 to 20 minutes of time, it's never 15 to 20 minutes. It's at least 30 minutes of time, sometimes an hour.

• 50:48Nick Bare?

  But if I were to say yes to all those requests, 30 people, considering each person gets about 30 minutes, that's 900 minutes of time. That's 15 hours.

• 51:04Nick Bare?

  15 hours in a week of just check-ins with people, which, again, I want to reinforce, this is not saying no to people when they need help or they ask for help, but sometimes these 15 to 20 minute requests are just check-ins or they want to present business opportunities or new products and services.

• 51:35Nick Bare?

  I will make time for people, businesses, organizations, when I think I should dedicate time to those things. But for the mass majority, if I were to say yes to all of these requests every week, especially in a very focused season, trying to find an additional 15 hours a week is really challenging and difficult. And it's going to take away from my ability to accomplish the things that I'm trying to accomplish in this given time. Something's going to have to give. You can't just keep layering on hours in a day and a week. It has to pull

• 52:18Nick Bare?

  from something else. It's either going to affect my work and my ability to work with the team here in the business. It's going to pull away from my time or focus, training towards this Ironman goal, or even more importantly, it's going to take away from my time with my family, being present, being active, being there, being focused.

• 52:45Nick Bare?

  15 hours is a lot. And I'd say that's, as I've mentioned, the low ball.

• 52:53Nick Bare?

  You might not realize it, and I know I didn't early on, but I was giving away a lot of time to things that in the grand scheme didn't matter. And it was affecting my ability to achieve the things that I wanted to achieve. And ultimately, it was an excuse of why I couldn't accomplish what I wanted to or said I was going to.

• 53:27Nick Bare?

  If you can't manage your time appropriately, and you're running out of time,

• 53:34Nick Bare?

  that's an invalid excuse of why you're not

• 53:39Nick Bare?

  doing the things you say you're gonna do.

• 53:44Nick Bare?

  Learn how to manage your time appropriately, and your life will change. Guaranteed. The fifth consideration is that we have to lead by example. We have the responsibility to be leaders.

• 54:03Nick Bare?

  And when you're presented with this decision of making an excuse, pursuing an excuse, or doing and honoring what you said you were going to do,

• 54:15Nick Bare?

  I think we have to ask ourselves the question, who are we influencing based off of our actions and decisions? Who are we leading? How are we leading?

• 54:29Nick Bare?

  We have to set the standard and hold the standard.

• 54:36Nick Bare?

  And when we're faced with

• 54:41Nick Bare?

  this fork in the road of do I go left and accept the excuse and lean in and not do? Or do I go right and honor the commitment and ignore the excuse and do what I said I was gonna do?

• 55:01Nick Bare?

  We have to make this decision for them and not you. For them and not ourselves.

• 55:12Nick Bare?

  Making excuses doesn't just affect you. When I make an excuse, it doesn't just affect me. It affects everyone around us. It affects everyone around me. Making excuses, I would love for us all to think of it this way. Making excuses is one of the most selfish acts that we can practice and demonstrate.

• 55:39Nick Bare?

  It is one of the most selfish acts that we can practice and demonstrate.

• 55:47Nick Bare?

  Benjamin Franklin has a quote. "He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else."

• 55:59Nick Bare?

  If you become really good at making excuses,

• 56:03Nick Bare?

  and you're consistent at making excuses, and you fall victim to negotiating with yourself and making the excuse of why

• 56:17Nick Bare?

  you should pursue what you want to do, not necessarily what you need to do.

• 56:22Nick Bare?

  You stop leading people.

• 56:26Nick Bare?

  You stop setting the standard and holding the standard. And you're placing yourself first and not others. You're not leading your family, you're not leading your team, you're not leading your peers, you're not leading people. We have a responsibility to work really hard and lead others by setting a standard and holding the standard.

• 56:56Nick Bare?

  This is one of the reasons I've actually decided to go into Ironman prep.

• 57:04Nick Bare?

  At this period of my life, as I've mentioned before, it's a really

• 57:13Nick Bare?

  full, it's a really full season of life. Over the past couple of years, I avoided going into an Ironman prep because I knew how much commitment was required. Time and energy. It is a time and energy, I don't want to say suck, but it is a time and energy commitment that will take away from other things that

• 57:38Nick Bare?

  you want to do, or other things that matter, or might matter in life.

• 57:47Nick Bare?

  But this is why I felt the need and the obligation to go into Ironman prep.

• 57:54Nick Bare?

  Because I can't make the excuse that I don't have time. I can make time. I can practice and implement these five things that I've shared today.

• 58:07Nick Bare?

  To lead by example, to set the standard and hold the standard.

• 58:14Nick Bare?

  I want to pursue this Ironman. I want to document the prep.

• 58:19Nick Bare?

  To show, not tell.

• 58:22Nick Bare?

  How you can be very ambitious with your own personal goals.

• 58:29Nick Bare?

  But also show up for your other responsibilities in life, for your family, for your business, for your team, for other people and individuals, in groups of people, community.

• 58:41Nick Bare?

  You can do it all. It is not easy. It is very challenging. It's supposed to be challenging.

• 58:50Nick Bare?

  But if you learn how to manage your time appropriately and prioritize the things that matter, or at least the things you say that matter, and then get comfortable with saying no to 99 things, you can say yes to the one thing.

• 59:05Nick Bare?

  That is an opportunity to lead by example.

• 59:10Nick Bare?

  To show what is required to honor your commitments. And keep growing and building and creating legacy and impact on other people. Another example that I wanted to share.

• 59:27Nick Bare?

  You may have noticed this, or you may have not. I have actively, the last couple months.

• 59:39Nick Bare?

  Made it a priority of mine to stop cursing.

• 59:48Nick Bare?

  And it still slips out occasionally here and there, but I'm very conscious

• 59:54Nick Bare?

  of the language that I use and the way that I speak because I do feel the responsibility to be a role model for other people that consume my content, especially young people growing up and building a family and entering the workplace and leading a life through God and following Jesus. And if I'm going to be that role model, you know, I'm going to be that person,

• 1:00:25Nick Bare?

  I shouldn't

• 1:00:28Nick Bare?

  curse or use language that I used to previously. I used to use language sparingly. I wouldn't say it was excessive, but sparingly and occasionally, language that did not match or align with my values and the legacy that I wanted to create and leave. And I used to use the excuse that, well, when I was in the military, when I was in the army, cursing was so normal that we used it like commas, which is actually pretty true, especially in an infantry unit. The F word is thrown out like a comma, left and right, and you don't think anything of it, and it becomes part of your vocabulary.

• 1:01:15Nick Bare?

  And you become a product of the environment that you are in, people you are surrounded by.

• 1:01:25Nick Bare?

  And you, I don't say you, I, accepted that, adopted that, and using an excuse of why I cursed and continued to curse, even though it didn't align with my beliefs, my values, the way that I wanted to lead a team and be perceived and

• 1:01:45Nick Bare?

  raise a family. So a few months ago, I made the conscious decision that I'm going to stop cursing. And it still slips out occasionally, like I said, but I'm working on it. But I'm no longer using the excuse of why cursed because of the environment that I was raised in, or the workplace that I started in.

• 1:02:12Nick Bare?

  And it's just part of the culture and the environment. No, that's not an excuse. It can't be an excuse.

• 1:02:21Nick Bare?

  That's one way that I have recognized excuses that I have made in the past and made changes to lead by example, to lead, influence, and set a standard for others.

• 1:02:41Nick Bare?

  Because I feel that that responsibility, I feel that obligation.

• 1:02:47Nick Bare?

  I think God provided me the opportunity to build these platforms, these social media platforms, and create content and tell my story and cultivate a community for a much larger purpose than that I once thought it was. I thought that my purpose years ago was to share fitness information. And, and that's why I was put on this earth. And that's why I was provided the opportunity to build these platforms. But there's been a mindset shift over the years where I, I truly do believe that

• 1:03:34Nick Bare?

  fitness is the medium and the bridge to cultivate community and this audience and these platforms to serve ultimately the greater good and purpose. Fitness is the medium. Fitness is the bridge.

• 1:03:56Nick Bare?

  But my responsibility as a role model, as a business leader, as a founder, as a husband, as a father, as a servant to Christ. I believe that's why I've been gifted the opportunity to build these platforms.

• 1:04:19Nick Bare?

  And that's going to guide the future of the way I use these platforms in my voice, in my message, and the way I serve the community and the audience that have decided to follow me and support me on this journey for these last 13 years.

• 1:04:42Nick Bare?

  But that guides a lot of my decision-making.

• 1:04:46Nick Bare?

  And it allows me to make the right decision and avoid the excuse, steer away from the excuse, because I know that there's an obligation to serve others in this journey and this process.

• 1:05:12Nick Bare?

  So, my hope, my goal with this episode is that you can listen to this, and there's practical key takeaways, so you stop making excuses, and you accomplish the things that you say you want to accomplish, and you honor those commitments every day consistently.

• 1:05:38Nick Bare?

  You're gonna miss, you're gonna be tempted, and you're going to pursue these excuses every once in a while.

• 1:05:49Nick Bare?

  We all do it, it happens to all of us, but don't make it habitual, don't make it routine, don't allow it to be consistent.

• 1:06:00Nick Bare?

  So go forth, conquer, and as always, go one more.