108: Recapping the Last 18 Months of Our Lives with Stef Bare

I'm welcoming back my wife, Stef, for an overdue catch-up on the trials and triumphs we've faced over the last 18 months. From the birth of our son, Niko, adjusting to life with two young children, surviving multiple moves including a brief stint in Nashville, and dealing with getting hit by a car back in December, we share how these experiences have reshaped our perspectives on family, work, and faith. We also discuss the importance of in-person community building, parenting challenges, and our goals for 2025 and the future, including exciting plans for Bare Ranch. CHAPTERS 00:00 Welcome Back to the Podcast 02:29 The Best Chicken Recipe 04:19 Reflecting on 18 Months of Madness 11:29 Lessons from Nashville 13:52 The Importance of Community 18:35 Balancing Alone Time and Socialization 29:08 The Two-Kid Life 37:43 The Car Accident: A Life-Changing Event 47:44 Balancing Work, Family, and Personal Growth 55:43 Parenting Challenges and Toddlerhood 01:10:09 Creative Resurgence and Community Building 01:13:59 Exciting Future Plans and Personal Goals 01:16:08 Book Recommendations and Closing Thoughts MENTIONS: Half Time by Bob Buford https://www.amazon.com/Halftime-Significance-Bob-P-Buford/dp/0310344441 The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson https://www.amazon.com/Circle-Maker-Praying-Circles-Greatest/dp/1491511370 Hunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans by Michaeleen Doucleff https://www.amazon.com/Hunt-Gather-Parent-Ancient-Cultures/dp/1982149671 BE 2.0 (Beyond Entrepreneurship 2.0): Turning Your Business into an Enduring Great Company by Jim Collins https://www.amazon.com/BE-2-0-Beyond-Entrepreneurship-Business/dp/0399564233 ORDER STEF'S CHILDREN'S BOOK, GO ONE MORE! https://www.amazon.com/Go-One-More-Stefany-Bare/dp/1957616873 FOLLOW: NICK IG:instagram.com/nickbarefitness/ STEF IG:https://www.instagram.com/stefany.bare/?hl=en YT:youtube.com/@nickbarefitness Become a BPN member FOR FREE - Unlock 20% off FOR LIFE https://www.bareperformancenutrition.com/pages/bpn-membership?srsltid=AfmBOorlpjVeag2kkt3eZ5UpWcFA5Bb2v5V_93lmO47Vn_Y8DRdLwDLL

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:05Nick Bare?

  All right, guys. Welcome back to another episode of the podcast. Today I have my wife Stephanie Bear back on the show.

• 0:14Speaker 01

  Howdy.

• 0:15Nick Bare?

  How are we doing?

• 0:16Speaker 01

  It's good to be back. It's been, we've had a kid, lots has happened.

• 0:20Nick Bare?

  This is our take two of, of trying to kick off this episode.

• 0:23Speaker 01

  If you see the tears.

• 0:26Nick Bare?

  Steph cannot form sentences in our first attempt.

• 0:32Speaker 01

  And the seat made it sound like I tooted, so we had to turn it over. So if you see tears, that's why.

• 0:37Nick Bare?

  She had a chair malfunction. But we're coming off of what we've been saying we were gonna do for the last 18 months.

• 0:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:46Nick Bare?

  Of our lives. And we said 18 months ago that we were gonna do a weekly lunch date. And we just did our first one.

• 0:54Speaker 01

  We did. Swedish Hill.

• 0:55Nick Bare?

  It took us 18 months, but yeah. Swedish Hill Bakery, Austin, Texas.

• 1:00Speaker 01

  Really good.

• 1:01Nick Bare?

  It was really good.

• 1:02Speaker 01

  The Westlake location was a vibe. It's beautiful out there. But yeah, different. We normally do date nights at night. This was nice. Some sunshine.

• 1:10Nick Bare?

  It was actually really nice.

• 1:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:12Nick Bare?

  I had a, a smoked turkey on Dill Harvarty cheese.

• 1:20Speaker 01

  Harvarty?

• 1:21Nick Bare?

  Dill Harvarty.

• 1:22Speaker 01

  Havarty.

• 1:23Nick Bare?

  Havarty.

• 1:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:24Nick Bare?

  Dill Harvarty cheese. It was on sourdough. It was a really good sandwich. And then we had these sides of pickled beets. And then like this sweet potato with goat cheese. It was incredible.

• 1:39Speaker 01

  Which I feel like the last podcast we did was centered around pickled beets, honestly. And you've had a recent breakup with them. And I'm surprised you ordered them today.

• 1:47Nick Bare?

  Yeah, I've taken a, I've been off the beet train for a few weeks now. I've been off the beets for a few, few weeks now. Uh, but I saw them. I had to go for them.

• 1:57Speaker 01

  They were really good.

• 1:58Nick Bare?

  Their menu was like really impressive. That's one of those spots that I could, I could keep going back to. If it was right down the road from us.

• 2:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:05Nick Bare?

  Go there.

• 2:06Speaker 01

  Good coffee.

• 2:07Nick Bare?

  All the time.

• 2:09Speaker 01

  Very good.

• 2:10Nick Bare?

  They had a half chicken on the menu.

• 2:11Speaker 01

  Oh, really?

• 2:12Nick Bare?

  Yeah, if any restaurant I ever go to has a half rotisserie chicken on the menu, I typically always get it.

• 2:20Speaker 01

  I don't know, I prefer your chicken now. Whatever chicken you've been making lately, that butter garlic, I dream about that.

• 2:29Nick Bare?

  Well, let me, let me, let me share, let me share this recipe really quick.

• 2:31Speaker 01

  Best chicken.

• 2:32Nick Bare?

  We have been making this

• 2:35Nick Bare?

  multiple times a week.

• 2:36Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 2:36Nick Bare?

  Sometimes.

• 2:37Speaker 01

  For whenever someone comes over, like the go to.

• 2:40Nick Bare?

  So I order, or don't order, I buy the store HEB chicken drumsticks and then bone in skin on chicken thighs.

• 2:50Speaker 01

  Skin on is the key, right?

• 2:51Nick Bare?

  Skin, yeah, yeah. We don't even buy skinless chicken thighs anymore.

• 2:57Nick Bare?

  So take them out of the packaging, we put the hardcore carnivore red seasoning on both sides.

• 3:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, have a sweet one?

• 3:05Nick Bare?

  Well, I add that first, then I use meat churches. Uh, it's like they're, they're pork seasoning. So I combine those two seasonings, hardcore carnival red, meat churches, uh, sweet like pork seasoning, I forget what it's called. And I put on the Traeger, cook it until an internal temperature of one sixty-five, take it off. Sometimes I hit it with a flamethrower, I recently got a flamethrower to finish off uh, a nice crust on steaks and meats, which is pretty epic. Take them off the Traeger and then I do a little mixture of some melted down Kerrygold butter and uh, Parmesan cheese on top.

• 3:50Speaker 01

  The grated parm.

• 3:51Nick Bare?

  Grated parm. And I will serve that with some potatoes or something, we're making those tonight.

• 3:56Speaker 01

  Oh, nice.

• 3:57Nick Bare?

  That chicken tonight. But uh, that's been one of our go-tos.

• 4:01Speaker 01

  We've been in our foodie era. For sure.

• 4:04Nick Bare?

  And, and not going to dinner much because of this season of life with two young kids, but making a lot more food at, at home.

• 4:11Speaker 01

  And our new kitchen is quite inspiring to cook in. So I feel like that's been fun, too.

• 4:16Nick Bare?

  Yes, I agree.

• 4:19Nick Bare?

  So let's talk about these last 18 months of madness. And I think the best way to this, this whole episode is really going to be us sharing the, the season of life that we're in right now. We have a two and a half year old daughter, Charlie.

• 4:36Nick Bare?

  We have a almost six month old son, Nico. We just moved into our new house. We've had three moves in the last 18 months.

• 4:49Nick Bare?

  We just signed the lease for a ranch. We, we moved into our new home. Lots going on, right? And I think the best way to set the stage to kick off these last 18 months is to reshare the story of it will be inconvenient. But in the last episode, when we talked about that, it didn't end in the way that it was going to be inconvenient. So I think we should

• 5:16Nick Bare?

  have a follow up in this one.

• 5:18Speaker 01

  I feel like we might be at the end of the inconvenient chapter. Do you think? I hope.

• 5:24Nick Bare?

  I mean, who knows?

• 5:27Speaker 01

  Who knows? Truly. Yeah, it was right before we moved, right? I think we decided we're moving to Nashville. I was putting Charlie on for a nap. I've only had, I, I guess, two encounters or like whispers from the Lord. When I'm having quiet time or praying or just, I don't know what. And this was the second one. So I, I knew the feeling, like I knew the whisper and I heard it's going to be inconvenient. And this was at a time we were deciding to move, making a huge life change. And I remember I came out into the living room and told you, right?

• 6:02Nick Bare?

  I think so.

• 6:02Speaker 01

  Remember? Yeah. And I'm like, oh, well, this is just going to be about the move. Like, of course, moves are inconvenient. We're making this big life change. We're taking a pretty big risk. It's going to be inconvenient. All right. Cool.

• 6:18Speaker 01

  And then I think we just thought it was gonna be the move.

• 6:22Nick Bare?

  Well, we got to Nashville with that in mind.

• 6:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 6:26Nick Bare?

  And as soon as we got to Nashville, I believe the first thing that happened was our hot water heater.

• 6:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, it was just like little, little, little things.

• 6:36Nick Bare?

  And there were things that were going wrong with the house that we just purchased. And we believed that that was the inconvenience that we were.

• 6:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 6:43Nick Bare?

  Going to experience.

• 6:44Speaker 01

  We were like laughing like, oh, how inconvenient, almost. Yeah, it gave us peace and it gave us something to like laugh at, but that was not it. That was not it.

• 6:52Nick Bare?

  The inconvenience was the fact that we uprooted our lives. We moved from Texas to Tennessee, bought a house in Nashville, which was a great home, awesome location. Not only moved our family, but two other BPN employees and families to Nashville. And I think we were there for five months.

• 7:23Speaker 01

  Up there in August. Five.

• 7:26Nick Bare?

  Thought we were there for five months when we realized that we were going to move.

• 7:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:32Nick Bare?

  Back to Texas, put our house up for sale, started looking for a home in Texas again, after recently just selling our home.

• 7:41Speaker 01

  While pregnant.

• 7:42Nick Bare?

  While, while Steph was pregnant with baby number two. We found out we were pregnant with baby number two a month before we decided to move back to Texas.

• 7:51Speaker 01

  So I was fresh in those first trimester hormones when you sat me down and you're like, we have to move back.

• 7:57Nick Bare?

  That was literally one of the worst days of my life.

• 7:59Speaker 01

  Me too.

• 8:00Nick Bare?

  I mean, we sat down on this couch while Charlie was napping one day. Probably Saturday, I think. And I didn't know how to address it, so I just said.

• 8:15Speaker 01

  And I knew, look, I already knew and I was just like avoiding you all day.

• 8:20Nick Bare?

  Yeah, we both were sitting on this couch. No one said anything. We were looking at our feet and I said, we gotta move back to Texas.

• 8:28Nick Bare?

  Obviously, that didn't go over well. I knew it wasn't going to. But with all that to say, the inconvenience was that we uprooted our lives, BPN employee lives, moved to Tennessee just to move back to Texas nine months later.

• 8:48Speaker 01

  But I also think it carried into being pregnant, right? We didn't even, because when we moved back, we wanted to do it right and move into a house that we could, you know, fully settle into, but we couldn't find that in time. So we had to move into a rental, which was a great home. But when you're in a rental and you're kind of in between settling and not settling, there were still, we had rooms of boxes still. So that was inconvenient. We were in a house where we didn't have a nursery for the baby. So it was just wasn't ideal. So I feel like that was even inconvenient. We thought the house was going to be done in September. Ended up being January or December. Yeah, August. So, yeah, I mean, it was just a bunch of, you could call inconveniences.

• 9:34Speaker 01

  But I think it was just all part of God's plan and it taught us lots of lessons along the way. And I don't think I would change it. As hard of a year and a half as it has been, I think I've grown more in the last 18 months than I ever have, just in every way possible. So it sucked, but I feel like you kind of have to have the sucky seasons to fully appreciate the good ones and the fruitful ones.

• 10:03Nick Bare?

  Yeah, I'm going to point in life where I'm realizing that a lot of the things that happen to us, happen for us.

• 10:13Speaker 01

  For sure.

• 10:15Nick Bare?

  So as much as the madness of these last 18 months has been, multiple moves, a new child.

• 10:23Speaker 01

  You and conveniently getting hit by a car, which we'll get into later.

• 10:27Nick Bare?

  All this madness and craziness, the last year and a half, has.

• 10:34Nick Bare?

  Created new perspectives and ideas and put things into perspective.

• 10:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:42Nick Bare?

  And they were very valuable experiences that shifted our life completely.

• 10:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:50Nick Bare?

  Not just geographically, but realizing what's actually important and, and what do we want life, life to look like in the future? And it's just been very, um, as hard as this last 18 months has been for our family, it's been very rewarding.

• 11:09Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:10Nick Bare?

  To say the least.

• 11:11Speaker 01

  What would you say the biggest lesson you learned just from that whole Nash, I guess we can, yeah, the Nashville chapter in general? Cause we haven't really talked about it. The biggest lesson you took and, and, and being back and having that life versus the life here?

• 11:28Nick Bare?

  Yeah. I mean,

• 11:32Nick Bare?

  after dedicating my entire life to building VPN for, at that point it was 12 years. My whole identity was wrapped up in building the brand and creating content and leading people. And I reached a point where I was just exhausted. It was truly just.

• 11:54Speaker 01

  I remember.

• 11:55Nick Bare?

  Exhausted.

• 11:57Nick Bare?

  You know, there's, there's a lot of responsibility in terms of leading people, building a business, creating content, uh, training for these, these fitness events to create content and build a brand. And I was just running myself into the ground. And part of going to Nashville was just, I didn't, I didn't know what else to do other than to run. I believe this was the first and only time in my life I've actually run away from my problems as opposed to addressing them head on. So I was running away from my problems as opposed to trying to fix them. And then when we got to Nashville, I knew right away. I didn't make the right decision. It was very unsettling.

• 12:38Nick Bare?

  And I realized that I thrive in leading people. I thrive in building this business and leading this organization. I need to do that in person with the team. And I get a lot from being in that position. And that's where I want to spend my time. It's what I want to be doing. It's what I want to be pursuing. It's my mission.

• 13:06Speaker 01

  Yes, I feel like there's a really big difference in you here versus there. Looking back at Nashville, I kind of just feel like whenever I talk about it with people, I just say, I kind of felt like, even though that's where we chose to be and that's where I always saw settling down, there was just kind of this like dark cloud. And me and you even talked about our house, kind of having this, like even when we would go back to the house that we were living in, it was a beautiful home, it was in a great area. But I remember coming back from travel and just not feeling like that home warm hug when you walk in. I remember we talked about that.

• 13:40Nick Bare?

  Yeah.

• 13:41Speaker 01

  Just everything about it, as much as I wanted to be there. And that's where I kind of feel like that's kind of the Lord letting you know, like maybe this isn't the plan I had for you. I don't know, but in a way it was. But for me, I feel like the biggest lesson I learned that I applied to our life once we moved back to here was, I feel like the biggest thing that I was missing there, and this, I feel like, isn't an us thing. It's for anyone that uproots their life and moves somewhere new where you don't know anyone, because we didn't, right? We probably knew a couple people, but we had no community there. And trying to find community in the phase of life that we're in, at that point, we were entering toddlerhood with one kid, pregnant.

• 14:25Speaker 01

  It's very hard to find friends and people to do life with, because at that point, a lot of these, a lot of people you meet have that already, or the people that are looking are also kind of stuck at home with their kids, or it's just hard. It's a hard season of life to try to find community. We didn't have that there. And I feel like eventually, could we have gotten there? I'm sure we could have found community. But I think. Making a decision to move back five months in and we were still there for what five months?

• 14:58Nick Bare?

  Mm hmm.

• 14:59Speaker 01

  After made that decision. So that last five months, it was like, well, I don't want to make friends. I don't want to get Charlie integrated into anything because we're leaving. That's a really weird gray space to be in. So of course that felt dark. So one thing that was a huge priority for me moving back here and it's it's relatively easy to come back to a place that you've already lived. Right? Like you go back to your same hair place. Yeah, your friends. So that was comforting, knowing that we were coming back to especially the VPN family, the community, all that. But I was just for our children and for myself. I knew that priority had to be in-person relationships and community and cultivating community.

• 15:43Speaker 01

  And I had so much anxiousness and again darkness during those 10 months. Mentally for me, like it was just really, really hard, was probably more anxious than I've ever been and I didn't know why. And then once we got back here, it all went away because I started prioritizing in-person relationships.

• 16:05Speaker 01

  And that we've we've even seen changes in Charlie, right? Like people, I just wish, I feel like that's, I feel so passionately now that one of the biggest issues in the world today, especially post-COVID, we're in this whole work from home, do everything from home. I just feel like the in-person relationships have been removed from people's lives. And I just feel like instead of,

• 16:33Speaker 01

  I don't want to get controversial, but I just feel like sometimes the number one thing that I wish I could prescribe to people would just be in-person relationships and people, like you have to have people in your life. I am so much more, and you can attest to this, like if you've noticed a difference, but I'm so much more fulfilled, happy, driven, inspired, just more joy-filled because I'm spending time with people. And I just feel like if you're feeling lonely or isolated or depressed or anxious, that would be the first thing I would ask people, like, do you have people that you love and you like spending time with around you? Because that's been the biggest difference between Nashville and here.

• 17:11Nick Bare?

  I don't know how people work from home, to be honest. Like when we were in Nashville, we had we had our office built out, right? Like and me, Jordan, Ian and Everett were working out of that office. And that was great for the first couple of months, but then in January of two thousand twenty four, I moved back into the CEO role. So I was on calls all day from January until we moved back in end of April. And I'd be on my computer on a Zoom call from

• 17:47Nick Bare?

  nine AM until five PM. And I'd break for thirty minutes to grab some lunch. Sometimes I'd eat lunch during a call. I just turn my video off. And I was losing my mind.

• 17:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:00Nick Bare?

  Being at my desk all day, sitting, working from home. I wasn't seeing anyone other than people virtually and you and Charlie, obviously. But I could not, I could not do that. Like, and that's why here at BPN, like, we have never been and never planned to be remote or virtual. Like, we are an in-person office because we know how beneficial that is for the culture and the camaraderie and just people's health.

• 18:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:32Nick Bare?

  Overall.

• 18:33Speaker 01

  I truly believe it. I also too, like, I feel, I'm kind of like a hybrid stay-at-home mom, right? Like, I'm getting more back into work and stuff, but I feel like I have lots of friends who are stay-at-home moms, and I think some women handle it better than others. But I know a lot of women who struggle with it, and it's frustrating because you think, like, I should be appreciating this time at home with my kids. This is like, everyone wants this. Like, why is it so hard? And I think it's the isolation aspect of it, especially if you were working or you were living a lifestyle where you were around a lot of people and then you're at home with a toddler who is making you question everything. It is so isolating.

• 19:17Speaker 01

  So even on days when I do have the kids at home, or it's just so important to get out into the world, like even just going for a walk. It's like, oh, there is an outside world. It changes your perspective so much. I think being a stay-at-home mom can be so extremely isolating. And the book I read that I blew you up with every morning, Hunt Gather Parent, highly recommend, it just talks about how The, you know, the world wasn't created and it wasn't made for people and families to live in isolation. It's supposed to be this community and it talked about all of these tribes, how kids were just getting passed around between aunts and uncles and friends and different people doing different crafts in villages. Like your kids are supposed to

• 20:01Speaker 01

  be around so many different people. And that's what I feel like today's age lacks. And that's why I feel like as a population in general, we're pretty unhealthy. I think people is like the number one thing that we're missing, you know?

• 20:13Nick Bare?

  Mm hmm.

• 20:14Speaker 01

  Relationships. Like I, I have learned I'm an extrovert. I believe you, what do you, what do you think you are?

• 20:21Nick Bare?

  I'm an introvert.

• 20:22Speaker 01

  Yes, for sure. Like I am like, bring the people over.

• 20:26Nick Bare?

  Which I enjoy.

• 20:28Speaker 01

  Yes, absolutely, absolutely. But I could do it. I will never turn it. Even if it's someone that I'm like, oh, I'm not in the mood. Like I will be like, yes, because I get energy from other people, which I feel like you do. I feel like you're kind of both.

• 20:41Nick Bare?

  I'd say I'm in between, but the way that I've been explained in introvert

• 20:45Speaker 01

  The recharging.

• 20:46Nick Bare?

  versus an extrovert, yes, is extroverts recharge. They gain energy by being around other people.

• 20:53Speaker 01

  Me, that's me.

• 20:54Nick Bare?

  Introverts recharge by being alone. I recharge by being alone. Like I need my alone time.

• 21:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:02Nick Bare?

  Every single day. And that's why I wake up early to, to make sure I can create that alone time.

• 21:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:09Nick Bare?

  Because that's where I like truly set the foundation for the day. I need that. I recharge. I feel better. If I don't get alone time, I lose my mind.

• 21:17Speaker 01

  Mm hmm.

• 21:19Nick Bare?

  That's why sometimes on the weekends.

• 21:20Speaker 01

  You lose your mind.

• 21:21Nick Bare?

  I lose my mind because one, I don't get the opportunity to recharge on my own. And then two, if we don't leave the house and we, we don't have that socialization aspect.

• 21:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:35Nick Bare?

  Even within a 24 hour period, it starts to wear on me a little bit.

• 21:39Speaker 01

  For sure. And people live their lives like that all the time. Yeah. Yeah. I, I think everyone can appreciate alone time. I don't think there's anyone that's like, I don't, I don't, I would rather be with people than be alone, but.

• 21:52Speaker 01

  I do value my alone time and I do feel energized from it, but no, I'm for sure. Like I'm more energized after a gathering or having people over than a moment of solitude, for sure. That's how we're different. It works.

• 22:05Nick Bare?

  It also depends on what people. Like, some people provide me a lot of energy.

• 22:12Speaker 01

  For sure.

• 22:13Nick Bare?

  And a lot of joy, and some people just wear me down.

• 22:15Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 22:16Nick Bare?

  So I think it, there's like a two-fold question to that. It's not just people, it's the right people that I want to be around that I want to spend my time with.

• 22:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, and time's so much more valuable too when you have kids. And you just think of, yeah, you have these little sponges around, it's really important to be selective with who you spend your time with. We've, we've talked about that.

• 22:39Nick Bare?

  Also, even with today's lunch, it's like we don't get the opportunity to just you and me go for a meal often. It's gotta be built into our schedule, especially lunch during the week.

• 22:51Speaker 01

  I don't think we've literally ever gone out for lunch till today. It's nice.

• 22:55Nick Bare?

  Well, there was one other time we did, uh, this was like years ago, we did a brunch.

• 22:59Speaker 01

  Oh, tiny boxwoods.

• 23:01Nick Bare?

  Yeah.

• 23:02Speaker 01

  That was before kids.

• 23:03Nick Bare?

  That was before kids. But, um, where I was going with that is because our time is limited, I did so much research to make sure that we were gonna go to the right place for lunch. Yes, I, we found out that the, uh,

• 23:19Speaker 01

  Downtown.

• 23:19Nick Bare?

  The downtown location of Swedish Hill was closed. And there's another location in Westlake, but I sent you this, uh, this list this morning. I was like, hey.

• 23:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, that was very organized.

• 23:32Nick Bare?

  Downtown, downtown location is closed. We have, here's your options. And I sent you each option with the Instagram account. It's like,

• 23:39Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:39Nick Bare?

  Go check it out, see what you want to go to, because I wanted to make sure that we're gonna enjoy our meal and the atmosphere and the energy and all of those things.

• 23:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:49Nick Bare?

  That's particular.

• 23:50Speaker 01

  I, I was like, whoa, this is nice. This is nice.

• 23:54Nick Bare?

  Organized. I will be your lunch chauffeur moving forward.

• 23:57Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 23:58Nick Bare?

  One thing that I took away from this whole Nashville move experience is that I believe we both used to do this. We thought the, the grass was greener on the other side or the next chapter. And we were always talking about this next chapter of life.

• 24:15Speaker 01

  When we.

• 24:16Nick Bare?

  Yes.

• 24:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:18Nick Bare?

  When our kids are five, we're gonna do this. When we live here, we're gonna feel this. When

• 24:26Nick Bare?

  we're making X amount of money, we're gonna buy this. We were always talking about the next thing and the next thing and the next thing. As soon as we moved in a new house, we were talking about the next house we were gonna buy and build.

• 24:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:37Nick Bare?

  In the future. We were horrible at that. And one of the things that this whole moving experience taught us, plus me getting hit by the car, I think at least taught me that the grass isn't greener. The grass is greener where you water it. And you can water the grass that you're currently standing on and be truly present. And I believe this is the first time in a long time that I at least haven't been talking about the next chapter and our next life and the next phase. And I'm truly embracing and trying to embrace the one we're in right now.

• 25:18Speaker 01

  Yeah. People, I think when we made this move, we weren't really sure how long we would be here. We, you know, we're just like, we don't know. And people love to ask the question like, well, is it Texas for good? Like, is this, is this it? And I always respond with, the new plan is no plan. And I, that's how I want to live my life because if this accident taught me anything, like, everything can be taken from you in a millisecond. So there, yes, like I, we're all for planning, right? And setting goals and having.

• 25:53Speaker 01

  Dreams to chase and all that. I think that's different than we were looking to the future from like an empty way, if that makes sense.

• 26:01Nick Bare?

  There's, I think there's a difference between like planning and preparing. And then planning and preparing at the expense of your current state.

• 26:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. So that was a huge thing, um, the change for me. I think too, when you have littles, it just feels super selfish and like it takes away from the present moment if you're constantly thinking about the next thing. That's why like every morning I pray for patience and to be a patient and present mom, spouse, all the thing, all the things.

• 26:34Speaker 01

  But yeah, I everywhere, even moving into this new house we just moved into last month, everyone's like, oh, is this a forever home? I'm like, I don't know. Like, who knows? Like, so what? It just doesn't, I don't want to live that way anymore. Just day by day. Every day is like a blessing, truly. And, um, it's, I feel like it's relieved a lot of tension in our relationship, not always waiting for the next thing.

• 27:01Nick Bare?

  Yeah, I agree. And we put a lot of intentionality behind building this house. I hope we're here for a while.

• 27:08Speaker 01

  We better be, my gosh. I don't want to see a freaking Home Depot box for a very long time.

• 27:15Nick Bare?

  We're doing no home projects.

• 27:17Speaker 01

  I don't want to have a tape gun in the home.

• 27:19Nick Bare?

  No, we're not, we're not moving, no home projects, no remodels, no additions. None of that stuff. We're not even hanging anything on the walls.

• 27:28Speaker 01

  What?

• 27:29Nick Bare?

  We're not doing, no, nothing, nothing.

• 27:32Speaker 01

  That's why I've been doing it.

• 27:34Nick Bare?

  This, this one time years ago, I gotta share the story. This is why Steph now.

• 27:40Speaker 01

  This is fresh off of my, in my, I was living in an apartment and I was alone myself. I had to be a self-sufficient woman. So I had to hang my own stuff.

• 27:47Nick Bare?

  This is why I don't let Steph hang anything on the walls.

• 27:52Nick Bare?

  Although the other day she sent me something that she hung on the wall. And I called instantly. I said, what did you hang? What did you use to hang that on the wall?

• 28:01Speaker 01

  What it came with.

• 28:03Nick Bare?

  Because a few years ago, I came home. And Steph had a wine rack hung on our wall and there are four bottles of wine on this rack. So it's heavy. I walked in, I was like, wow, this looks really nice. How did you hang this? I walked over, there were two tiny nails barely hanging in the wall anymore. Not in the studs, not in the anchors, two into just empty drywall. Hanging on by a deer thread. I don't know how those nails were still just holding on. It must have been the angle.

• 28:40Speaker 01

  By the grace of God.

• 28:42Nick Bare?

  I'm like, there's no way. There's no way you can tell me you thought this was a good idea.

• 28:49Speaker 01

  Did it fall?

• 28:50Nick Bare?

  It didn't fall because I got to it just in time. It would have 100%.

• 28:54Speaker 01

  I guess we'll never know.

• 28:57Nick Bare?

  So now I take lead on hanging things. But I don't want to hang anything in this new house. I don't want to mess it up.

• 29:07Nick Bare?

  It's dangerous.

• 29:08Speaker 01

  Let's talk about two kids, the two kid life.

• 29:13Nick Bare?

  It's tough.

• 29:16Speaker 01

  I don't think it's that tough.

• 29:17Nick Bare?

  Oh my gosh.

• 29:21Speaker 01

  I've been having a pretty good time.

• 29:24Nick Bare?

  It's a good time, but it's like to say it's not tough.

• 29:27Speaker 01

  But it's, yeah, I feel like the experience for me, this postpartum experience, I feel like has been more pleasant. I think a lot of it comes from second time confidence for sure.

• 29:41Nick Bare?

  The second kid definitely does not get the attention that the first kid gets.

• 29:44Speaker 01

  That is very hard. But I feel like he's chill because of it. I'm like, is he chill because he's got chilled jeans? Or is he chill because I forget about him laying on the floor for 10 minutes?

• 29:55Nick Bare?

  It's so true. It's so true.

• 29:57Speaker 01

  It is true, but I can't wait to see how that translates. And now I actually understand people are like, oh, middle child syndrome. Oh, the youngest, the oldest, like it, I feel like it for sure shapes them because of the amount of tension that they don't get. They always say your first gets your time, your second gets your experience, and that is so true. It is so true.

• 30:15Nick Bare?

  Yeah, Nico's immune system has to be like the strongest thing ever.

• 30:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:22Nick Bare?

  He, uh.

• 30:24Speaker 01

  Charlie's running.

• 30:24Nick Bare?

  He's gonna be a tough kid. I'll tell you that. He's gonna be a tough kid.

• 30:27Speaker 01

  He's so chill. He's like, he's like the best baby. He's better than Charlie was.

• 30:31Nick Bare?

  I mean, I'm not complaining by any means saying like, oh, two's tough.

• 30:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, you're just throwing back into the trenches again.

• 30:37Nick Bare?

  But like in the infant phase, I mean, our, our nights are absolute chaos. From the moment I get home from work until we get both kids down, I probably get four thousand steps.

• 30:49Speaker 01

  Oh, my gosh.

• 30:50Nick Bare?

  At least.

• 30:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, there's no sitting. There's no sitting.

• 30:53Nick Bare?

  And me and Steph are, I've talked about this before, but we are believers in family dinners. And sitting down for a family dinner, regardless of the season or, or chapter of life that we're in.

• 31:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 31:06Nick Bare?

  And it always ends up with like one person standing, holding Nico. I just end up eating my hands. I'll just take rice and I'll just cup it in my hand and put it in my mouth. Whatever I gotta do.

• 31:20Speaker 01

  Kind of unnecessary, if you ask me.

• 31:22Nick Bare?

  Whatever I gotta do.

• 31:23Speaker 01

  It just adds to the drama. We really have to eat with our hands.

• 31:28Nick Bare?

  It's, it's more convenient than a fork or a spoon at that point.

• 31:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 31:32Nick Bare?

  Charlie's on top of the table. The dogs are counter surfing, eating the leftovers.

• 31:40Nick Bare?

  But every night, we end up getting the kids down.

• 31:45Nick Bare?

  We get to spend a little bit of time together.

• 31:47Speaker 01

  Yeah. It's nice having the sauna again.

• 31:51Nick Bare?

  We started sauna-ing.

• 31:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 31:53Nick Bare?

  Together night, which we got an H O A complaint for our sauna.

• 31:59Speaker 01

  Freaking Bill.

• 32:01Nick Bare?

  Bill will be listening to this episodes.

• 32:03Speaker 01

  We love you, Bill.

• 32:04Nick Bare?

  We love you, Bill.

• 32:05Speaker 01

  We do love Bill.

• 32:07Nick Bare?

  And we're not really sure. Bill said he didn't file a complaint.

• 32:13Speaker 01

  I think we're cornered by neighbors who hate us, but.

• 32:16Nick Bare?

  We've lived in the house for one month. We've had two HOA complaints. One for the sauna, which is, in my honest opinion, exaggerated. You can see the peak of the sauna outside of the fence.

• 32:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 32:33Nick Bare?

  But what sparked the first HOA complaint, because the sauna was the second HOA complaint. The first is that Steph is building a, like a copy shop.

• 32:47Speaker 01

  It's a playhouse.

• 32:48Nick Bare?

  A playhouse for Charlie in the backyard. The intent was for this playhouse to be small. It ended up being like 10 feet tall and like four feet over the top of our fence line.

• 33:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 33:02Nick Bare?

  That's what triggered the HOA complaint. And we got two HOA complaints and these were like not easy to file.

• 33:09Speaker 01

  No.

• 33:10Nick Bare?

  Complaints. I, I, I had to get site plans and I have to draw to scale where these structures are at. I've submitted applications twice already. They've been kicked back because I didn't have enough supporting documentation.

• 33:26Speaker 01

  And the problem is Bill's on the HOA.

• 33:29Nick Bare?

  That's the tough part is

• 33:32Nick Bare?

  my neighbor who, who says he didn't file a complaint is that he's on the board for the HOA. So like, who knows? We might have to move because we might get kicked out of this neighborhood over the sauna and the playhouse.

• 33:46Speaker 01

  I think we'll be okay. What do you say? It's better to beg for forgiveness than ask for permission or something?

• 33:53Nick Bare?

  Ask. It's, it's better to ask for forgiveness than ask for permission.

• 34:00Speaker 01

  Right.

• 34:01Nick Bare?

  In that case.

• 34:03Speaker 01

  How we live our life.

• 34:05Nick Bare?

  But that's, that's, that's currently how we're being welcomed back into the, the neighborhood.

• 34:12Speaker 01

  But yeah, I feel like the nights have been more peaceful. Like we've, both kids, most nights are down by eight 30, eight, eight 30. So we have an hour and a half to chill, which has been nice. It's been nice. I feel like our mornings, we finally, I feel like.

• 34:32Speaker 01

  New adding new children to the family has always been hard for us until we like dial in our morning routine and I feel like once we dial in our mornings and we're one of us isn't like when we're both balanced in that way, I feel like we're like, okay, we got this. And I feel like we're in that place right now. Do you agree?

• 34:48Nick Bare?

  Yeah, we had a great routine, morning and night.

• 34:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 34:54Nick Bare?

  Which makes, I mean, we are creatures of habit.

• 34:57Speaker 01

  Mm hmm. I've made a huge change this year. I feel like I am finally getting up consistently earlier. Um, and that's probably been the biggest game changing thing for me, too.

• 35:08Nick Bare?

  Tell me about it.

• 35:10Speaker 01

  Well, it's hard to because I know we're gonna probably run into a season where one of them is waking up at like five thirty again. I I get DMs all the time from moms being like, how do you work out in the morning? My kid's up at six. And I was like, I didn't work out in the morning when Charlie would wake up at five thirty. But I feel like most kids grow out of it, right? So we've been in a really good rhythm with Charlie where she gets up between seven and eight. And Nico, we're in a good rhythm right now where you wake him up before you leave for your run and you give him a bottle, which makes him sleep until eight. So now, I used to, I still prioritize sleep. Um, but I know now I need a little

• 35:53Speaker 01

  less than I think I need and I can, I'm fine. Um, but getting up before both of them is only doable because they both get up at a pretty good time. Like if they're both getting up at six, it would be different for sure. But because they both get up a little bit later, I like to be up by six. And at this point, you're out running. So the house is like very quiet and peaceful, which I truly like never really experienced consistent, consistently. So I understand why you like it so much. And I make my coffee, I drink my greens and reds and stuff, I turn on the fireplace because it's cold and cozy. And I read my morning devotional, I pray, and then I read for twenty minutes, um, whatever

• 36:33Speaker 01

  book I'm reading, like snuggled on the couch. And then you come in, see you run by the door. And it's just been very peaceful. And I'm trying to soak it in because I feel like now that I've said it's peaceful, tomorrow it's gonna change.

• 36:48Nick Bare?

  Well, the other day I was coming back from my run because I typically get back and I can see reading by the fire in the living room. And I came in the house and I saw that the TV was on, which the TV is never on at that time.

• 37:00Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 37:01Nick Bare?

  And it was like this kid's show and I got a flashback.

• 37:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 37:06Nick Bare?

  Back to Nashville.

• 37:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 37:08Nick Bare?

  Oh, no.

• 37:09Speaker 01

  Steady 5:30 AM wakeups.

• 37:11Nick Bare?

  Wash you up, but she was just getting, coming off of.

• 37:15Speaker 01

  She was hungry.

• 37:16Nick Bare?

  Being sick.

• 37:16Speaker 01

  The day before. Yeah.

• 37:17Nick Bare?

  Yeah. I want to take a quick break in this episode to talk to you guys about how I use our products around my endurance training and how you can as well. Now here at BPN, we've created products to fuel your performance and optimize your recovery. But I want to talk specifically around how I use these products in my morning run. Before my morning run, every morning, I'm not training fasted. I want carbohydrates and I want electrolytes. So I consume two scoops of G1M Sport, which is our carbohydrate and electrolyte powder, and one Go Bar, which is our lightweight oat-based bar.

• 38:00Nick Bare?

  With this combination, I'm getting about 800 milligrams of sodium and 76 grams of carbohydrates total. Carbohydrates for the fuel, electrolytes for the hydration. This is going to set me up to have the best run possible. Fuel and hydration. Now, based off of the distance, duration, and intensity of that run, I will add in Go gels during the workout. And the Go Gel is our simple ingredient, endurance gel, 24 grams of carbohydrates in each gel and 110 milligrams of sodium. We have a non-caffeinated version and a caffeinated version.

• 38:44Nick Bare?

  The caffeinated version has 75 milligrams of caffeine per gel. And I will have one Go Gel every 30 to 45 minutes or every four to five miles. And we really created the Go Gel. For these bigger effort runs or endurance training sessions and races, they are extremely useful during races because you get a quick hit of energy from the fuel, the carbohydrates, some hydration from the electrolytes, the sodium, but they also digest very easily. So you're not going to have stomach discomfort and GI distress. And then after my run, I want to rehydrate. So I'm always adding in our electrolyte powder,

• 39:29Nick Bare?

  one to two scoops. Each scoop has 500 milligrams of sodium, full electrolyte profile. So I'm using our products to fuel training, enhance hydration,

• 39:43Nick Bare?

  maintain effort intensity during training sessions with the Go Gel, and then rehydrating immediately after. So that's how I use our products around my early morning runs and all my endurance training and how you can as well. So go to bpnsubs.com, check out all of our endurance products to fuel your performance. And now, back to the episode. What's nice about being back in this neighborhood is I have a safe run route again.

• 40:10Speaker 01

  Thank goodness, yeah.

• 40:12Nick Bare?

  And I don't see like any cars on my morning run route now. Wide streets, I can log all my miles in the neighborhood, which is the same neighborhood we used to live in.

• 40:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 40:23Nick Bare?

  And I've, I back then used to log during ultra training, 30 mile runs.

• 40:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 40:29Nick Bare?

  30 miles in the neighborhood. I'd have to go back and forth a lot of times.

• 40:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 40:35Nick Bare?

  But I could stay in the neighborhood.

• 40:38Nick Bare?

  Huge difference compared to our rental where I had to be on a main road for a mile before I could hop off that main road, hence why I ended up getting hit by a car, which I think is a good segue into talking about.

• 40:53Nick Bare?

  What has come out from me getting hit by that car? And I've already shared my perspective and experience on that, so I don't wanna go back and reshare that. But I'd love to hear from your perspective, what changed after I got hit by that car?

• 41:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, that sucked. It was pivotal for sure.

• 41:18Speaker 01

  Just so many weird things leading up to it. I, I don't know if you've like talked about all of the weird kind of like what like, what are the predispositions that we had leading up to this like? I've always had this fear of getting hit by a car. I think it stems from like a personal family experience that we've had with someone getting hit by a car and passing away. So I'm just, I'm just so anxious about it. Whatever. And you are an idiot and don't bring your phone half the time, which doesn't help at all.

• 41:46Nick Bare?

  Typically only on speed workout days, I don't carry my phone.

• 41:49Speaker 01

  Okay. But yeah, it's always been a concern and worry of mine. I have a memory at one of our old houses, me like getting in the car and driving around looking for you because you were late. I've done this multiple times. The week before the accident, one of those happened where I can't, why were you late? Cause you gave Nico a bottle or something?

• 42:11Nick Bare?

  I had to leave my run late, cause as I was heading out, Nico was crying.

• 42:16Speaker 01

  And I didn't know that, I don't think, I don't know. But you didn't have your phone and

• 42:21Nick Bare?

  This is a speed workout day.

• 42:22Speaker 01

  Okay. You didn't have your phone and you were pretty like routine at this point. So I knew when you'd be home. And then I saw the school bus in our neighborhood and I'm like, he is always back before the school bus. What is happening? Mind you, this is when we're living in the rental. This road, Nick said it's dangerous, but I don't think anyone can fully understand how dangerous this road is. Like it's the dumbest road to ever exist in the world and people are idiots on it. So I've always just had this fear.

• 42:48Nick Bare?

  Yeah, to give context to that, if people would ever come to run with me, I wouldn't allow them to run on that road with me.

• 42:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 42:55Nick Bare?

  I'd make sure we drove somewhere else to start, because I didn't want them on that road.

• 43:00Speaker 01

  But you would run on it every single morning in the pit black.

• 43:02Nick Bare?

  I trusted myself.

• 43:03Speaker 01

  But honestly though, I do think it was from this where you were mentally, I think, and not that you didn't care. I I don't know. I just think your your whole perspective changed. I don't even think you were thinking in a mindset like, ah, I don't know how to say that correctly. I don't think you didn't care that you were on an unsafe road.

• 43:24Nick Bare?

  I was on autopilot in life.

• 43:26Speaker 01

  Yeah. You were just like, whatever.

• 43:28Nick Bare?

  I was so overwhelmed with like, all the things that I was trying to balance with.

• 43:34Speaker 01

  You were like a robot, truly.

• 43:35Nick Bare?

  Yeah, I was in a, I was in a bad place. Like, I was trying to lead and build a business. I was now navigating, being a father to two children. I was in a prep for a new race. I, you know, I got the podcast I'm always planning for and preparing YouTube videos that we're always planning and preparing for. I mean, like, I have a very jam-packed schedule, and it's not a schedule that I jam-packed just to keep me busy. So it's very intentionally structured to do all the things that I want to and need to get done.

• 44:12Nick Bare?

  But this was like, a peak of it where I was just so obsessed with routine and controlling every part of my life to maximize the outcome, that I was just like on autopilot, doing these things I knew I had to do. Like, I could have woke up, and I still would, but could have woke up and there was a tornado coming through that road, and all of the news anchors would have been saying, don't leave your house, and I would have went and run.

• 44:47Speaker 01

  That's a great example. That's exactly, that's exactly the headspace you were in, which is not okay.

• 44:54Nick Bare?

  And it wasn't even like, to do that to be hard. It was that I was that controlling and obsessed with just getting everything I had to do to get done, no matter what. I wasn't even thinking clearly.

• 45:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, you were just, you had a white-knuckle mentality in your life at that point. Like, I've never seen you have a tighter grip on things that, yes, matter, but in the chapter we were in, it was just confusing to me.

• 45:23Nick Bare?

  Give me examples.

• 45:25Speaker 01

  Just, I, I mean, I remember we were, we were arguing a lot for those couple of months leading up to that accident. And all of my concerns were, can you just chill a little bit? Like soak it, like, look at Nico, look at Charlie and Nico, like soak it in. Like, I, I was actually, and I wouldn't say enjoying postpartum, but I was pretty present and I was in a really good headspace and I was really happy and relieved that I was in a good headspace, especially given the move we were about to do, approaching the holidays. And I just feel like you were just dark cloud over your head, weren't enjoying anything.

• 46:08Speaker 01

  And I remember I told you, this is kind of all side barring, but I guess this all relates back to the accident. But I remember when we had the final walkthrough, remember, at the house? This was before the accident, this was like a week before the accident. And we're walking through this house that I, a home that I never in my wildest dreams think that I would ever live in. It's beautiful, it's perfect. I still am like, why do I get to live here? This is crazy. It's so special. I remember that night, you were just like in a mood and I've had my fair share of moods too, for sure. But I was walking through, we were walking through with our builder and I just remember being like, why am I not excited about moving into this house right now? Like, I was looking at you and I'm like, why am I not excited?

• 46:53Speaker 01

  I'm like, I'm not excited, this is brutal, but I told you this. I'm like, I'm not excited to live in this house with him right now because he's just not very happy. And I came home and I told you that. And I'm like, I need to say this because this, there needs to be a change, but I'm not really excited to move into this house with you because I feel like you're not excited and you're not happy about it and you're not like, oh, we finally get to do this.

• 47:19Speaker 01

  It was really hard. But then I would during that walk through, you said to the builder, made it nine months, living off of this road, didn't get hit by a car. And then what was it 48 hours later?

• 47:32Nick Bare?

  Forty eight hours later.

• 47:33Speaker 01

  Yeah. And then the week before, as I was saying, I waited on the driveway for you because I was talked myself into thinking you got hit. This was a week before the accident. It's all just crazy, crazy. But this is like how the Lord works for sure. So, yeah, I feel like I, of course, don't want you to ever be in harms way. And I hate that you had to get hit by a car to have this perspective change. And I remember thinking too, because like the days after, remember that's when I said to you, I feel like I have my buddy back. Like he was, you were almost like childlike, like seeing life through this like childlike lens and you were more present and just joy filled with the kids and with me than I have

• 48:17Speaker 01

  had with you in a long time. So I remember thinking like, okay, well, this accident, this accident doesn't fix everything. Like, of course, it doesn't fix everything. But I think it was a huge perspective shift for you. And we talked about how I truly think that was the Lord being like, hey, Nick and Steph, like this was the lesson for me too, 100%. See, all these beautiful things you have, all these gifts I'm giving you, I can take them away like that. And we got a little glimpse of that.

• 48:52Nick Bare?

  Yeah.

• 48:52Speaker 01

  And we've talked a lot about, even the book I'm reading right now talks about the fear of God a lot. And I don't think it's, we've talked about this, like fearing God is not being afraid of God and you don't love him because you're scared of him. But that like challenged me in that sense a lot. And um, I don't know, it was just a life changing thing. You have been, I still can't, you've just been more chill. And you've been, you've loosened the grip for sure. I feel like you, you're not fully palms up. I don't think that's who you are, which is fine. I think that's a lot. That contributes to a lot of your success, but you've been, I would say your group, your grip is almost completely released.

• 49:35Speaker 01

  I've seen, I'm trying to think of some of the things I've seen you do where I'm just like, oh my gosh, like who is this? You, I remember a moment like on Christmas morning, or the day after Christmas morning, you ate the cinnamon rolls I made. You ate the snail, the cinnamon sugar snails on Christmas day. And I used to get kind of upset when you wouldn't do that because of a goal, or you were scared that it was just gonna make you feel bad and then you couldn't hit a run as well. You just were more present and you, you're eating like, you, what, you ate a pretzel the other day and I was like, Nick would never eat a freaking Snyder's pretzel. You're just, I can just tell.

• 50:14Speaker 01

  Your whole mentality seems a little bit more like, okay, like this is my one life. Like what's this? I don't know. Totally different, totally different. I hate that you had to get hit by a car. Um, but it was just one of those life events that kind of changes things, you know?

• 50:33Nick Bare?

  Yeah, when my life feels like it's, like I'm losing control of it. And I'm overwhelmed with a lot of things that are going on. And I think a lot of this was sparked by having a second child. And that kind of pushing me over the edge a little bit. What happens when I start feeling like I'm losing control is I grasp onto whatever I can control. And for me, a lot of times that is work, my diet and my training. And.

• 51:08Speaker 01

  It's all it really is.

• 51:09Nick Bare?

  That, that is, I can use that to a, a strength sometimes. I think people on the outside looking in.

• 51:18Nick Bare?

  Could be like, wow, you are so disciplined with your work and your diet and and your training. And yes, there's, there's a a positive result that comes from that. But there's also collateral damage.

• 51:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 51:35Nick Bare?

  That is created through that too. Where it got so out of control that my meals. And I typically eat my meals around the same time every day.

• 51:47Speaker 01

  The 10 a.m. church meal.

• 51:49Nick Bare?

  Yeah, so we, we I usually, I used to, I've been more loose with like my meals lately too.

• 51:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's been great. I used to get secondhand stress. I used to plan my days around your meals because I'd be like, I don't want him to get mad that he can't eat his sludge at 10 a.m. on the dot.

• 52:06Nick Bare?

  I used to always have my second meal at 10 a.m. on the dot. Like, like a psychopath. And if I knew I was going to be traveling or going somewhere else, I'd have that meal with me.

• 52:18Speaker 01

  In a Yeti cooler.

• 52:19Nick Bare?

  In a Yeti cooler.

• 52:22Speaker 01

  Literally goes to church three miles down the road with a Yeti cooler.

• 52:26Nick Bare?

  Yeah, which sounds so stupid, but I just like, it is whatever it is.

• 52:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:33Nick Bare?

  And when Nico was born, we started going to a later church service, a 10 a.m. church service. You know, so we get to church at 9:45 to be in church, sitting down for the 10 a.m. service. And this completely disrupted my second meal of 10 a.m. routine. So I would bring the cooler with me and I'd eat that meal right before going into church. That's how wild it got. I couldn't wait an hour till after church was over to eat it. And even the team here

• 53:15Nick Bare?

  says things about it because we'd be in a meeting at 10 a.m. In that meeting, I'd pull out a meal and just start eating it. And we were, we were in our leadership L10 the other day. And I waited until the meeting was done to go make my meal.

• 53:31Speaker 01

  Who said it? Who noticed it?

• 53:32Nick Bare?

  Joe was like, wow, you're there. You actually didn't make a change. You actually are a new person. But I've been able to funnel that control.

• 53:47Nick Bare?

  To, I'm just gonna say it, to be successful in, in different parts of my life. But they have come with collateral damage.

• 53:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 53:59Nick Bare?

  And.

• 54:00Speaker 01

  I think you can get away with it a lot easier when you don't have kids.

• 54:04Nick Bare?

  Oh, yeah, for sure.

• 54:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 54:06Nick Bare?

  I mean, what other changes have you seen post accident?

• 54:09Speaker 01

  You only work out once a day, which I love because the, the two a days was stressful. And that also took away time, I feel like, from us a little bit. Um, yeah, I, I, I was pretty annoyed by the two days thing. I get it when you, we were training for high rocks, like that was needed for sure. And you were really good about getting that second workout in during like the workday because you guys were filming or whatever. But yeah, working out once a day, I mean, I know you're a marathon prep, but I mean, I've never seen you so chill about working out. It's just so seamless. Like, we used to get in arguments about your rigidness with the morning run and even like on vacations and all this stuff.

• 54:55Speaker 01

  And, um, running hasn't changed, but, but I have no bitterness or resentment around it because you're just, you're balanced. All I've ever wanted for you is just, I don't think, we always say like you don't balance, you juggle. I don't think we're ever gonna be balanced. It's just not a thing with the lifestyle we live. I think most people can agree. But all I wanted was just an attempt at balance and some actual, I mean, the amount of times we've sat down on the couch and been like, what can we fix here to make you less stressed or to make you more fulfilled? Same with me. And we talk about changes, but they never were really made. But I think this accident in a way kind of forced it on you.

• 55:38Speaker 01

  Yeah, I just feel like your eyes are a little bit more wide open.

• 55:42Nick Bare?

  I feel much better.

• 55:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 55:45Nick Bare?

  I feel happier, I feel more fulfilled.

• 55:52Nick Bare?

  The way I was explaining it to you was, you know, I read this book called Halftime by Bob Buford.

• 56:02Nick Bare?

  And it was shared with me at the perfect time in my life. And it talks about how the first chapter of your life is focused on success and the second is focused on significance. And I feel like I'm at this halftime intersection where I'm going from just purely focused on success to now significance. And these last couple of years was prioritized around being this athlete first. And then founder entrepreneur second.

• 56:38Nick Bare?

  And I'm not saying that family was third, but family is like kind of overarching above all of that.

• 56:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:45Nick Bare?

  Athlete first, founder entrepreneur second.

• 56:49Nick Bare?

  Now I'm founder, business, entrepreneur focused first, athlete training second.

• 56:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:57Nick Bare?

  And I say that not to say that I'm not disciplined, I'm just as disciplined. But I'm more flexible in the way that I approach that discipline than I previously was.

• 57:06Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah, that's a great, I think a word, you become more flexible for sure. Which I feel like when you're in our season of life, freedom is limited. And you're, you have to be flexible because you have no idea what these children are gonna throw at you. Or what version of them you're gonna get. So to have, to have like, it's kind of like me in the middle, right? I was in the middle and I have one side of me, I have this crazy toddler and a newborn.

• 57:41Speaker 01

  I couldn't, I, there's no rigidness. I can't have any rigidness in my schedule. Like it's just, has to be completely all about them, um, when we're with them. And then I have you who is like, holding on for dear life to all the things that you can control. And I just felt like I couldn't, I don't, I just felt so off balanced and like, always feel supported by you in parenting a hundred percent. But I wanted you to just, I wanted that joy back. To make all of the challenges that you face as a parent, um, a little bit easier. And that's what I feel like has been a huge difference. I just feel like I can handle a lot, I can handle a lot more because the overarching

• 58:24Speaker 01

  attitude and perspective is just more flexible and more joy filled.

• 58:32Nick Bare?

  I had this noted that I wanted to talk about, coming out of the accident, is that I think it cured my FOMO, or fear of missing out. Transition to parenthood, for me was tough. I personally struggled with it. I think a lot of people do struggle with it.

• 58:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think a lot of men struggle with it. And it's just not talked about a lot. Cause I think the woman's the only one that can complain about it, but it's earth shattering to everyone involved.

• 59:04Nick Bare?

  I struggled with it, with our first, and then even more with our second. Cause I had this fear that I was missing out on all these things. And I think as the leader of a business, I feel like I need to be at everything with everyone at all times. And if we're hosting an event downtown on Saturday morning, if I'm not there, I have this fear of missing out. And post accident, that, that fear of missing out kind of just drifted away.

• 59:33Nick Bare?

  Because I realized that I'm not missing out on anything where I want to be is with my family. That Saturday morning, no matter how chaotic.

• 59:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 59:42Nick Bare?

  Or crazy it is, I'm actually not missing out on anything. And it was just that realization of what do I think I'm missing out on?

• 59:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 59:52Nick Bare?

  I'm not. I mean, I'm where I want to be with who I want to be, doing what I want to do. But it took me two and a half years to get over that.

• 1:00:04Speaker 01

  If anything, I feel like you now have FOMO at home, like, like last week, you came home and you were ready to go to dance class with me and Charlie and I'm like, what are you doing? And you're like, go on, let's take my truck, we're going to dance class. And I'm like, well, I'm gonna take her to dance and you're gonna stay back with Nico so we can let the babysitter go.

• 1:00:23Speaker 01

  You're like, fine. And you're genuinely, I think, a little upset by it, but like now I feel like you have FOMO at home, like you're, you're home earlier because you're not getting that second workout in. And I do see, and I feel the same way too, like I, once you hit toddlerhood, everything changes. And you don't want to miss out on anything because especially now that we have a Nico who's six months and a Charlie who's two and a half years.

• 1:00:50Speaker 01

  You see how quickly it goes and how, how quickly you get into like the fun, like I was never someone, and this, this could be a hot take, I was never someone, and I think you're the same way. Where like I, I would have girlfriends or you see these like posts online, like of women crying when their kid turns one and they're like, oh my gosh, like I, I'm so upset. I'm just beside myself that my kid is getting older and me and you were like, bring on the years, like it gets more fun as the years go on.

• 1:01:17Nick Bare?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:01:18Speaker 01

  But I will say, I remember the first time it happened, I was putting Charlie down and Charlie has these, like her, best feature is her cheeks. Like she's had these cheeks since she's been a baby and they've stayed somehow. And I hope she has them when she's 40. Whatever. But I had this, like, I was putting her down and I had, she was like laying, like in a cradle position, which she really doesn't do much anymore. But for some reason that night she was and I, this little glimpse where like her face in the dark kind of looked like her little baby toddler face. It was the first time that I was like, oh no, like I can feel time slipping away and I can feel her face changing and everything's changing. Okay, at least I have Nico. Maybe we just have to have more babies so you can keep getting this dopamine rush.

• 1:01:59Nick Bare?

  Slow down, slow down.

• 1:02:01Speaker 01

  But that was the first time that I was like, oh dang, it does go by really fast. And I, it is kind of weird seeing Charlie get so much older. It's really fun. But um, yeah, I feel like with the FOMO thing, I see you now have more FOMO with what's going on at home, which is really sweet and it makes me feel good.

• 1:02:22Nick Bare?

  I've realized how short life is.

• 1:02:26Nick Bare?

  And like we've stated, how quickly it can be taken away from you. And I want our kids to grow up looking back and realizing how much time I spent with them.

• 1:02:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:02:42Nick Bare?

  Someone made this comment to me the other day. They said, um, the only, the only people in your lives who will remember how much you worked are your, your spouse and your kids.

• 1:02:53Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 1:02:54Nick Bare?

  Like none of your other employees or coworkers or leaders will remember years from now how much you worked.

• 1:03:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:03:03Nick Bare?

  But your kids and your spouse will. And I want to make sure that my kids spend as much time with me and I spend as much time with them growing up. Because life's short.

• 1:03:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:03:15Nick Bare?

  And like, you only get that shot one time. You don't get a do-over.

• 1:03:19Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah. I think life is a constant balance of managing that emotion of I don't want to miss a thing. I should be home and this is a struggle that I deal with on a daily basis. But also me and you love to work and we have passions outside of family, which I think is healthy and necessary. But I, I think, yes, we want our kids to grow up seeing my mom and dad spent so much time with me and there was so much love and affection. But also, my parents worked really hard and they built these really cool things. Or my mom was really good at this and.

• 1:03:54Speaker 01

  You know, I, I think that's a really hard balance figuring out how to stay fulfilled and happy with what you're doing in your, in your own life while also feeling like you're getting enough time with your kids. It's, it's so hard.

• 1:04:08Nick Bare?

  Well, that's why I'm excited as the kids go, get older, like bringing them along for the journey.

• 1:04:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:04:14Nick Bare?

  That's why I bring Charlie to BPN on the weekends and I just show her.

• 1:04:19Speaker 01

  She loves it.

• 1:04:20Nick Bare?

  The warehouse and I talk to our two and a half year old like she is thirty four years old.

• 1:04:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think we both do. Yeah.

• 1:04:28Nick Bare?

  Like I walk her down the fulfillment line in the warehouse. I'm like, this is how orders are packed.

• 1:04:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:04:33Nick Bare?

  You know, let's, let's grab some protein. Let's, um, let me show you like the, the automated fulfillment line, the opera that we have. Let's go into my office. I mean, they'll show you what I'm working on. And at night, when I tell our stories, they're stories about building the business.

• 1:04:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:04:51Nick Bare?

  And places we've traveled to and all these things. And she picks up on it. She, she, she knows what we're talking about.

• 1:04:59Speaker 01

  For sure. We were just saying at lunch, or we were, I think the other night too, we were saying parenting doesn't really start until you hit toddlerhood. And I feel like maybe, I feel like kind of now it's really beginning, like two, two and a half. Um, it is a whole new ballgame. We're always like, why do we ever complain with a newborn? Like, I don't think I've, besides like the occasional like fussiness, like I feel like I don't have a right to complain about Nico because it's so easy compared to toddler. It's toddler life is I feel like so much more fun and rewarding. Like I, you are thriving right now in this phase with Charlie.

• 1:05:44Nick Bare?

  Oh, for sure.

• 1:05:45Speaker 01

  Hundred percent. But, um, it for sure has its challenges. Like I feel like this for toddlerhood for me, because you really just don't. You don't understand toddlerhood until it happens and it is wild. Like I remember talking to you and I was like, I, I think they were probably both screaming in the car. And I'm like, the human body isn't made to have this much like fight or flight cortisol. Like, I just feel like I can never come down because you're being screamed at and like your body is like, we are unsafe, we're getting screamed at, but in reality, it's just like a manic kid. Like it is so challenging managing toddler motions. That's been the most challenging thing for me, but it's been, when you have little wins,

• 1:06:30Speaker 01

  it's the most confidence boosting thing. Like that's what I'm experiencing now. I was telling you my little hack about the word thermostat. I don't know where I heard this from. I think it was from a parenting book or Instagram account probably. But this totally changed my perspective because I generally run a little reactive as we both know.

• 1:06:52Nick Bare?

  Things in your blood.

• 1:06:53Speaker 01

  It is. It's in my DNA. My family is very emotional and reaction first, like which, whatever. It's just how we are. So.

• 1:07:03Nick Bare?

  The band of blood.

• 1:07:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's, it's not chill. There is no chill in my DNA. So when I have this toddler meltdown or I'm stressed and overstimulated and all this stuff, like I generally like have a hard time being that like calm, whatever parent. But when I heard this kind of, um, what's it called?

• 1:07:27Nick Bare?

  Analogy.

• 1:07:27Speaker 01

  Analogy. Oh, the thermostat, it's stuck with me and it's really helped. And it was saying how being a parent, especially to toddlers who are a little out of control,

• 1:07:37Speaker 01

  your job as a parent is to be the thermostat of the home. What's the job of thermostat in a home? It's to keep the home at a comfortable, safe.

• 1:07:48Speaker 01

  A comfortable, safe place, temperature, environment. So when your kid is hot and angry and throwing themselves on the ground because they got the blue cup instead of the pink cup, and it's crazy. Your job as a parent is to be the thermostat to bring it back down, to just like keep the home at a chill, perfect seventy degrees. So sometimes now when I feel the heat rising with Charlie and I'm like, okay, here we go. I just literally think of the word, I feel like I should get a tattoo of a thermostat on my wrist because it's truly changed my perspective. Like, my job is to bring us back down. Like, I, like, climate control. Like, I need to bring it back down because the number one thing I've learned about being

• 1:08:31Speaker 01

  a parent of a toddler is they are direct reflection of you and your emotions. Down to if, remember the time when she fell in Ryder's puke?

• 1:08:45Speaker 01

  Charlie was running and she fell in Ryder's puke and I could not contain my, I was like, you were turned away, you know what's happening? I'm like, oh my god! And I freaked out and you thought she fell and cracked her head open. But I reacted because I, she was covered in dog, and it was so much dog puke. And what did she do? She freaked out. She was terrified because she saw mommy and mommy was terrified. That's a silly example, but even like taking her to dance class and all these things, like, I have to give myself a pep talk sometimes and be like, alright, walk in, be confident, be friendly, say hi to this person. Because if she sees that I'm cool and happy and joy-filled and confident, like, she's gonna be like, okay, like, she's my, I'm like her thermostat.

• 1:09:28Speaker 01

  She does like what I set, like, you set the tone for. And, um, definitely not perfect and I'm still working on it and I have days where I am more like the smoke detector rather than the thermostat, but it's a huge thing I'm conscious of, um, because I think that's really important for kids to have, is a parent that like brings them back down to safety and calmness. I've also learned too, when we're in the middle of a tantrum, they don't hear you. I have to let her finish and just be quiet and hug her or hold her, instead of be like, whoa, can I get you a milk, can I get you a chocolate chip, can I, you just have to like let them go, be quiet, because they can't hear you while they're doing that.

• 1:10:09Nick Bare?

  The approach I like to take and I found it works is I just come out with the energy.

• 1:10:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:10:14Nick Bare?

  And I try to shift the energy like

• 1:10:16Speaker 01

  Goofy.

• 1:10:16Nick Bare?

  Funny goofy.

• 1:10:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:10:19Nick Bare?

  If we go and like wrestle, I like just try to do something.

• 1:10:23Speaker 01

  You can literally turn tears into laughter in five seconds, sometimes with the right amount of humor. You're really good at that. Yeah.

• 1:10:30Nick Bare?

  Yeah. I wanted to share the story and you told me not to, but I'm gonna share it anyways.

• 1:10:35Speaker 01

  Dog vomit, why not? Bring on the other bodily fluids story.

• 1:10:39Nick Bare?

  This for me was like one of the funniest stories that's happened recently.

• 1:10:42Speaker 01

  Charlie's so funny right now.

• 1:10:43Nick Bare?

  She's so funny right now.

• 1:10:46Nick Bare?

  We were, uh, and once Charlie's a little bit older, I do want to have her on the podcast. I think that'd be a hilarious episode.

• 1:10:50Speaker 01

  She'd love it.

• 1:10:51Nick Bare?

  It would just be a million questions.

• 1:10:53Speaker 01

  Who's that? Who's that guy? What's that guy do? Where does he work?

• 1:10:56Nick Bare?

  It's a million questions all day. But, um, she does recognize the VPN logo. She knows it.

• 1:11:02Speaker 01

  Oh, she recognizes it. She's so smart. It blows my mind.

• 1:11:05Nick Bare?

  She knows the HEB logo.

• 1:11:07Speaker 01

  She knew the coterie diaper box logo. She knows diapers. I'm like, what?

• 1:11:10Nick Bare?

  Target. She has a Target logo, which isn't a hard one. But, um, we were in the bathtub the other night and she likes having a bath snack.

• 1:11:21Nick Bare?

  Sometimes the bath snack changes, like two nights ago, we had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in the bath. Uh, the night before that we had chicken and rice. She was like going chicken and rice kick.

• 1:11:33Speaker 01

  Trail mix was going hard though.

• 1:11:35Nick Bare?

  Trail mix. We were in a big trail mix kick. She liked having HEB trail mix

• 1:11:40Nick Bare?

  in the bath, which is like dried mango, uh, nuts, seeds, uh, dried fruit, some chocolate chips in there. So

• 1:11:52Nick Bare?

  sometimes she would drop pieces of the trail mix in the tub and they were like some certain things would melt or like just fall apart. So she's in the tub and she grabbed something that's in the tub and handed it to me. She goes, what it is?

• 1:12:09Speaker 01

  What it is?

• 1:12:10Nick Bare?

  Which, which is the way she says, what is this? What it is? And it looked like a melted chocolate chip on her hand. I was like, what is that? So I picked it up. I'm looking at it, I smell it. It was a turd.

• 1:12:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:12:24Nick Bare?

  She pooped in the tub, picked it up and handed it to me. And as like a parent, you just like throw it in the toilet. You like wipe your hand on like your shirt and you just go back to what you were doing. They're just like puke and poop everywhere.

• 1:12:42Speaker 01

  Mm hmm.

• 1:12:43Nick Bare?

  Everywhere.

• 1:12:44Speaker 01

  We got a potty train. We gotta get to that. But yeah, she is a riot right now.

• 1:12:50Nick Bare?

  All right, let's talk about what we're excited for in this next chapter of life. I'll let you go first.

• 1:12:58Speaker 01

  I feel like my creative, my creativeness, creativity is coming back. Six months postpartum, here I am almost. Always takes a hit, but I feel like it's taken a hit the last 18 months. I've kind of put all projects and work aside because it's just been nuts, honestly.

• 1:13:18Nick Bare?

  I mean, you launched a kids book.

• 1:13:19Speaker 01

  I did, I did. Yes, you're right.

• 1:13:21Nick Bare?

  During that time?

• 1:13:21Speaker 01

  Yeah. Um, but I do, I feel creative. I feel my, my only goal right now in life is to, and I've had this with my quiet time in the morning, is to just be more still and try to actually listen and hear and then follow the calling and the path that God has for me because I find when I'm a little bit more quiet, I can, I have more clear direction with that. And for me, what I've felt this year, um, is number one, like in-person relationships. So like this year, a huge priority for me is just to be like the cultivator and the connector in our community. Like I started a book club with, it was, it's like 20 girls.

• 1:14:06Speaker 01

  It's like a faith-based book. I wanted to bring girls together because I'm like, well, maybe it's like, I need these girls. I need this community, but I think hopefully like this is God being like, these girls need each other too. So just being that connector, um, and like I'm hosting a little kid's Valentine's party, just like cultivating in-person experiences I feel super called to do.

• 1:14:28Speaker 01

  Um, I pray every morning, like, bring the people that I need into my life and bring me to the people that need us. Like, that's just where I want to be headspace wise. And then I feel really creative in the kitchen again. Um, I feel like my Instagram's slowly turning into a food account, but I also, I just feel like our nation right now is pretty hype on health. And I love it. I think that's awesome. Like, me and you both are so passionate about a healthy household and being a leader for your kid in that way. So I just feel really called to helping families simplify being healthy and, you know, doing the things that create health and mentally, physically, and yourself

• 1:15:12Speaker 01

  that will translate to your kids, I truly believe. So loving the cooking stuff lately, I just want to be more present and still. And everything I do, like, I don't know if you noticed, but like, I just, I don't know, I just feel this like longing to be super close with God this year. Like, everything, I don't really want to listen to, read, do anything that doesn't, like glorify Him. Like, it's all worship music for me. Every book I want to read, I don't want to read fiction. I want to read books that challenge me from a faith standpoint. I just feel so much more whole when I'm doing that. So that's, those are my goals this year.

• 1:15:50Nick Bare?

  To no more raunchy romantic novels.

• 1:15:54Speaker 01

  Let's not start rumors here.

• 1:15:57Nick Bare?

  Who's that popular author that all these girls read?

• 1:16:01Speaker 01

  Colleen Hoover?

• 1:16:02Nick Bare?

  Yeah, there's like romantic.

• 1:16:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, I went through Colleen Hoover. No, you're acting like I'm reading like, I don't even know. Um, no, I'm not, I'm not in my fiction phase right now. Oh, my gosh. But, yeah, so that's where I'm at. I feel creative. I feel pretty connected to God, get there more. And I just want to be a connector with people. I want people, I want to use our new home. I want people to walk into our home and feel warm and welcomed and feel the Holy Spirit and be like, oh, this is, this is why we have this home, to gather people and bring light to people. That's where I'm at. What about you?

• 1:16:45Nick Bare?

  I love that. Similar, actually. There's a lot that I could share that I'm excited about, but I'll, I'll focus on one because the.

• 1:16:57Nick Bare?

  The foundation of 2025 for me is just focus. It's doing more with less. I'm saying no to a lot of things.

• 1:17:06Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:17:07Nick Bare?

  But I'm really excited about building on this ranch. Bear Ranch, 240 acres in central Texas.

• 1:17:15Speaker 01

  Oh, they know.

• 1:17:18Speaker 01

  You've been wearing it on your shirts and your hat. So yeah.

• 1:17:22Nick Bare?

  I'm excited about this because I also feel like I've been called to build this property out to bring people together. I don't know exactly what that looks like yet. Like right now, I'm just in the the building phase of it, remodeling the house, building out a pond, uh, putting a 2,400 square foot, um, barn gym on the property, running trails, host races there. But I feel like

• 1:17:50Nick Bare?

  I'm being called to create this property to bring people together in person for a real, meaningful connection. Again, I don't know what that looks like exactly yet, but I just feel like I'm supposed to build this and that's what I'm pursuing right now. Um, and investing money into it with really no intentions of making money on this property, but

• 1:18:15Nick Bare?

  talking about going into the second chapter of life, focusing on significance rather than success.

• 1:18:21Nick Bare?

  That's what I'm excited about. It's, it's moving off of a digital platform more into an in-person experience and truly connecting with people, impacting people's lives and leading others, especially men, to be uh, more intentional, stronger, thoughtful leaders of their businesses, their peer groups, their families.

• 1:18:48Speaker 01

  Yeah. Bring it back. Bring the in-person stuff back. It's so needed.

• 1:18:56Speaker 01

  For health.

• 1:18:58Nick Bare?

  I agree.

• 1:18:59Speaker 01

  Hundred percent.

• 1:19:00Nick Bare?

  Talk about this book that you're reading right now.

• 1:19:03Speaker 01

  The one I just finished reading.

• 1:19:04Nick Bare?

  Yes.

• 1:19:04Speaker 01

  The first book club book, um, The Circle Maker. Life changing, highly recommend to anyone, whether.

• 1:19:15Speaker 01

  I would challenge nonbelievers to read it because it's pretty hard not to believe after you read this book. I need you to read it. You need to read it. It's like the perfect book to start your year off with. It's all about prayer and it's taught me so much about prayer, how weak I am in my prayer life, truly.

• 1:19:34Speaker 01

  I don't know, it's just, it motivates you to pray really big. And um, I think. A lot of people could read this book because it's kind of, it talks about. This author who's a pastor and how he got through so many, he was just granted so many miracles and things that shouldn't have gone his way. And he would just pray circles around these things that he wanted, or he believed God was calling him to. And his prayer life was just so big, like so huge. And it made me realize that I, whenever I pray, I just like run through a list of what I'm grateful for. Um, because sometimes it kind of can feel weird asking God for something, asking God um, for something that you want. And um, this whole book.

• 1:20:20Speaker 01

  I feel like someone could read it and be like, oh, so all I have to do is like, this is why I think you would like it. I think it could, you could read this book and be like, oh, all I have to do is pray for a million dollars and I'll get a million dollars. Perfect. I'll pray all day for a million dollars. But what's so cool about this book is it talks about how God wants you to pray. But he also wants you to work really, really hard. Like prayer paired with work is like the sweet spot. And like what he wants to see you do. And I think that's why you would like it so much because. Prayer isn't this like miracle thing. Um, you have to work really hard and you have to stay faithful to God and all this stuff. It was just, it's very, very motivating. It's a different type of motivation and.

• 1:21:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, just challenging for sure, but we haven't talked about it yet in book club. So I'm excited next week to chat with a bunch of girls about it. But the circle maker, there's also a bunch of like renditions off of it, like praying circles around your kids. Um, yeah, if you think you're good in your prayer life, this book will show you that you're not for sure. But that's the book I'm reading. And now I'm reading the awe of God.

• 1:21:29Speaker 01

  So, yeah, two for two this year so far.

• 1:21:32Nick Bare?

  I'll have to add those to my list.

• 1:21:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:21:34Nick Bare?

  I will be a fly on the wall during book club. After I put the kids down, I will be serving wine and appetizers.

• 1:21:41Speaker 01

  What's the book that you've been telling me about?

• 1:21:45Nick Bare?

  I'm currently in, uh, in a Jim Collins book called Beyond Entrepreneurship 2.0. I'm a big Jim Collins fan in terms of all things leadership and entrepreneurship.

• 1:21:57Nick Bare?

  And, um, most of my reading that I do is, is business leadership focused.

• 1:22:05Nick Bare?

  And one of my favorite quotes from this book, which pretty much is a snapshot of the foundation of the value and lessons through his, his material in this one is that a good strategy, sorry, a great strategy without great people is irrelevant.

• 1:22:27Speaker 01

  Say it again.

• 1:22:28Nick Bare?

  A great strategy without great people is irrelevant. So a lot of the, the beginning parts of this book, which I'm in the middle of this book right now, it's all about how important having the right people on your team is.

• 1:22:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:22:45Nick Bare?

  People who align with your values and your mission and believe and want to contribute, but are also experienced, talented and have the skills and ability. You can't have one without the other. And the only way you build a, or a marketable company that can endure a long duration of time is by having the right people on the team. So that's what I'm enjoying right now.

• 1:23:11Speaker 01

  Yeah. I'm loving reading again. It's um, you listen to your books, right?

• 1:23:18Nick Bare?

  Audio books.

• 1:23:19Speaker 01

  Audio books, yeah.

• 1:23:20Nick Bare?

  While I run.

• 1:23:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, that morning time for me in a book is like so special. For sure.

• 1:23:27Nick Bare?

  All right, well, that wraps up this episode. Hopefully we have another lunch date next Friday.

• 1:23:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:23:36Nick Bare?

  And then.

• 1:23:37Speaker 01

  Hopefully the next eighteen months aren't like last, we can just chill out a little bit.

• 1:23:42Nick Bare?

  I mean, I don't know if anything can get worse than the last eighteen months.

• 1:23:48Nick Bare?

  But I don't want to talk too soon.

• 1:23:52Nick Bare?

  Any closing thoughts you want to share?

• 1:23:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, thanks for having me on.

• 1:23:55Nick Bare?

  Absolutely. See you guys in the next episode.