Schooled: The Moth Podcast

On this episode, stories of the lessons we learn, both in and out of school. This episode was hosted by Michell Jalowski. Storytellers: As teenagers, Cathy Gasiorowicz and her sister Nina create a mime alphabet book… that’s surprisingly morbid. While a special ed teacher in Chicago, Annie Tan fights an unsupportive principal to provide more resources for her students. Romy Negrin and her Latin Club compete in the highest division. Podcast # 994

• 0:02Speaker 00

  Welcome to The Moth. I'm Michelle Jalaski. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but we're coming to the end of the summer. And I gotta say, it went by so fast. One day, you're celebrating the summer solstice, and the next, it's time to pack up those bookbags for the first day of school. It's been many years since I've been a student, but I still viscerally remember the apprehension and excitement of a new school year. New clothes, new binders and pens, a new year, new me attitude. All told, I've spent about 21 years in school. That's nearly half my life, but I'll be honest with you, I'm hard-pressed to remember anything concrete I learned. The order of the planets, state capitals, what the mitochondria does. I know I knew these things at one point, but please don't try to ask me now.

• 0:47Speaker 00

  Luckily for me, an education isn't just all about book learning. On this episode, stories of the lessons we learned both in and out of school. First up is a story about learning the ABCs in a completely unique way. Kathy Gaziorowicz told this at a Twin Cities Story Slam where the theme was books. Here's Kathy, live at The Moth.

• 1:08Speaker 01

  When I was in 10th grade, our English teacher gave us an assignment to do a project on communication. It was wide open, you could write a paper, you could perform a play or sing a song. Anyway, so when I told my parents about it over dinner, my mom said, "Well, why don't you and Nina," Nina's my older sister, "why don't you guys make up your own mime alphabet book?" Which was, it's fine, it was not an altogether original idea. Marcel Marceau had just come out with the mime alphabet book, but hey, template. And my sister had been taking photography classes through the Minneapolis Urban Arts

• 1:50Speaker 01

  Program for a bit, and I had just started taking mime and dance classes. So it was actually a really brilliant idea, except for the part that Nina and I hadn't really agreed on anything since I was probably 10, when we disbanded our Man from Uncle Club. So I was now 15, she was 17, but she was game, she wanted to do a project, and I didn't want to write a paper. So we sat down and made a list of, well, I mean, the 26 letters, you know, were given, but we made up words that went with each of them and, like, shockingly, agreed on nearly

• 2:35Speaker 01

  every one of them. And probably because we both came from the same uncs-ridden home. So D was for dying, fear, F was for fear, G was for guilty, S was for spite, T was for trapped, V was for vicious, X was for xenophobia, which was Nina's idea. So we went down to the basement, a couple of days later, put a sheet down on the basement floor, and I had my black leotard and tights on, I put on some mime makeup, and then against this pink stucco wall, Nina took pictures while I did these poses.

• 3:20Speaker 01

  And then, the following weekend, we spent two magical days in this darkroom. She had gotten a key to the place where they were taking classes, and for two days, I mean, it was, she would develop the film, and we would watch things kind of come to life, and then we would develop pictures, and then the pads and these photos would just appear on these squares of paper. But I turned it into my English class, and I got an A. I don't want to brag, but then, one of the girls in my class, Robin, asked if she could borrow the book to show it to her next-door neighbor, who happened to own his own children's literature publishing company.

• 4:02Speaker 01

  So she brought the book, the mime alphabet book, to him, and then, a couple of months later, we got a phone call that Learner Publications wanted to publish our book. And they were willing to offer us a flat fee of $300, no royalties, which, at the time, seemed impressive compared to what I was making babysitting, and plus, I'm going to just say it as an aside, it was a terrible book, and nobody else would publish it, but I didn't really realize that at the time, but I just had a sense that this was not negotiable. Anyway, but they had a couple of requests. We had to change a couple of the letters.

• 4:43Speaker 01

  C was for cannabis, which, this being, you know, 1971. And E was for Eve, where I was clutching my pubes and my breasts and looking away from the camera in shame. Oh yeah, wait, we also had to change R for rapier, either because it was French, or it sounded like a very bad word. So that became rescue, but again, my brow was furrowed, and it was not a happy rescue. So thematically, the book still really hung together. Anyway, then, crickets, until a year and a half later.

• 5:26Speaker 01

  And then the book was published, and there was no book signing or mime promotional events. It was just sort of a, here's the book. And they gave us some copies, which we gave to people like party favors. But then, about six months later, we found out it had been reviewed by the New York Times. And the reviewer said something to the effect of, I paraphrase only a little bit, "It takes a lot of chutzpah for two such talentless girls to publish their own book."

• 6:08Speaker 01

  Anyway, Nina and I moved on and kind of went our separate ways, although we actually got along really well over the years. She's now like one of my favorite humans on the planet. And just a couple of years ago, we started trading back and forth through email, links to websites that mentioned the book. There's like this, it's like a, it's not like a cult following, it's like a cult hating or something. Like, what the, this, this is, these are, I don't know who these girls are, but they are sick. There's something sick about them.

• 6:51Speaker 01

  Another one is like, "woe freak, worst book ever." It's also listed on awfullibrarybooks.com. And awful book covers. And my favorite, weirdbooks.com, we are listed on the top 10 right below stray grocery carts in eastern North America. Thank you.

• 7:16Speaker 00

  That was Kathy Gaziorowicz. Kathy is a former mime, dancer, and marketing writer. As a storyteller, she's performed at The Moth, Patrick's Cabaret, the Minnesota French Festival, among many other places. Kathy tells us that she and Nina keep trying to unload copies of the book onto the nibblings, but so far, without success. And if you feel like you need your own copy, we checked, and as of this recording, it is available on eBay for $25. Next up is Annie Tan, who told this at a New York Story Slam where the theme was instincts. Here's Annie, live at The Moth.

• 8:01Speaker 02

  I've been wanting to be a teacher since I was six years old, because I grew up in Chinatown, and I didn't know English, and all I wanted was my mom. And Ms. Sheridan saw me, and she made popcorn with us, shook up heavy cream and made it into butter and milk, and I knew then I wanted my students to feel as good as I felt. So in my second year of teaching in Chicago, I was a special education teacher, and I was like, I don't know what to do, because I had kids, like, they would run out of my classroom, like, anytime they were startled, or I had kids who were third graders, who were still in diapers. And then I had kids like Grace, and like, Grace is not her real name, because I'm not

• 8:44Speaker 02

  going to mention her real name, of course, but Grace had autism, and she didn't speak. And I was like, how am I going to teach a kid who doesn't speak? And I noticed, right, I noticed her, and I heard her sing and hum this song every day. (singing) Right, it kind of sounded like the Fred Rogers neighborhood one. And I just realized, I have to see this girl, I have to figure this out. And I asked her mom, "What's this song?" And she says, "It's the Daniel the Tiger theme song. It's like a kids' show on PBS." So I was like, "Got it. I'm going to find a karaoke version of this song and play it for her."

• 9:29Speaker 02

  Words, right, "In a beautiful day in the neighborhood, won't you be my neighbor?" And I realized, "Oh, songs." So I started putting pictures with the words in each song, and I realized I could use pictures with words to teach her. And I started giving her these tests with these laminated picture cards that I spent hours and hours on with Velcro, and she'd pick the right answer every time. Who was causing the problem in The Three Little Pigs? The wolf. Right? So I knew this girl was smart, but I didn't know how to teach her, so I realized I got to learn more. And so I asked my principal, "Hey, can I go to a training," because I had found this training, "to use picture words to communicate," right?

• 10:13Speaker 02

  So you could say things like, "I want computer." And I would make Grace give me all those cards, but I didn't know what else to do. And so I asked my principal. And he goes to me and he just says, "Ms. Tan, where do you think your students are going to be as adults?" And I was like, "What?" And he was like, "Your kids aren't going to make anything of themselves." And I was like, "Wow. Who is this guy?" I start asking around the teachers, and the teachers in the school are all terrified of him, because we're all getting developing ratings, and he's fired multiple teachers

• 10:55Speaker 02

  without telling them, so they all got these HR emails. So this is a terrible guy, and I'm like, I got to find out if this is happening in other schools. So I started going to the Chicago Teachers Union, and I actually end up going to a special ed committee, and I end up running it for two years. And, thank you.

• 11:16Speaker 02

  And I realized this is not just happening at my school. This is across the city. And they encouraged me to start a union chapter in my school and like try to do things there. So I gathered the teachers together and we're trying to figure out what to do. Meanwhile, I'm trying to be the best teacher I can. And I'm continuing to find these trainings. And the next year at school, I bring Grace's parent, her mom, to the training. And we figure out this device that might teach Grace how to speak, 126-picture device. And she goes, Ms. Tan, like, I have seen my child as handicapped this whole time. And I see everything she does in school.

• 12:00Speaker 02

  And she's not, she's so smart. She's an individual. And I have to start treating her that way. And I'm like, all right, like, I'm making something happen. And then I find out my principal is going to retire the next year. So I'm like, maybe something will get better. And then in May, the last day of Teacher Appreciation Week, I got an HR email. And I was like, oh, my God, like, I can't believe this. Like, I've worked so hard to see Grace and all these other kids. Like, was I wrong to like, start this union chapter to fight for her, to run the Special Y Committee? And I'm crying for weeks. But I'm not the only one crying. So I see Grace on the floor one day in school.

• 12:45Speaker 02

  And this is not something I'm supposed to be happy about or anything. But she's crying on the floor. She's got her back like on the floor and she's kicking. And she's screaming, "No, no!" And the assistants and I are just crying, "Yes, yes!" Because Grace had said her first word, "No." Thank you.

• 13:18Speaker 00

  That was Annie Tan. Annie is a writer, educator, and activist based in New York City. After 11 years in special education classrooms, Annie has gone on to nonprofit work supporting the Asian-American community and is writing a memoir about her family and activism. After the break, a story about Lingua Latina. Back in a moment. Welcome back. Our next story is a favorite from the archive. Romi Negren told this at a New York City education showcase where the theme was "Betwixt and Between." Here's Romi, live at The Moth.

• 13:58Speaker 03

  So at my school, there are some kids who take Latin. We call them losers. And some of those kids have gone the extra mile and joined the competitive Latin team. We call them pathetic losers. And I am one such pathetic loser. I started taking Latin in seventh grade. I was like, oh, it'll be fun and ancient, whatever. And everyone I knew was like, "Don't take Latin. It's a dead language. Who are you going to speak to in Latin? The Pope? Someday." But I started taking Latin and I fell in love with it.

• 14:41Speaker 03

  Aww. And at the beginning of eighth grade, my Latin teacher was like, "Hey, you should join Kurtamen, the competitive Latin team." Kurtamen, for those of you who don't know, means competition in Latin, because you go to competitions to do Latin. And I was like, sure. So I joined the Kurtamen team. And it's me and three other kids in the novice team. And we start practicing for the first big competition of the year, Yale. They have these competitions at all the big universities, Yale, Harvard, Princeton, you know, where you expect this sort of thing to be. And we start practicing.

• 15:26Speaker 03

  And the big day finally arrives. And we gather at Grand Central at like 5:30 in the morning, too early. But we don't care because we're off to New Haven. New Haven, Connecticut. What a town. So we get on the train. And one of my friends has brought along this ball of chocolate, this big, huge for chocolate, wrapped in the shiniest tinfoil you ever did see. And we agreed as a team that we would eat that chocolate if and only if we made it to semifinals.

• 16:09Speaker 03

  So that's an extra incentive, other than the fact that I'm inherently competitive by nature. And there's glory in victory. So we're on the train and we're practicing. We're conjugating our verbs, like, "porto, portas, portat, portam, is portat, is portat." And we're singing our song, "Row, Row, Row Your Emperors." And my Latin teacher is just there. And she's like, "Yay, we're all going to have fun." And I was like, "Yeah, winning would be fun." And we finally arrive at Yale.

• 16:48Speaker 03

  And every competition starts off with a lecture, where they bring in one of the classics faculty to like, give us a talk about Roman pottery to get us into the competition mood. And so that's like the start of the day. And then they ask you questions, oh, they ask you questions about Roman history, mythology, Latin vocabulary, grammar, literature, basically like everything. And so we go to the lecture. And after the lecture, they tell us that they've pioneered this fun new system, a bracket

• 17:29Speaker 03

  system, where for each division, novice, intermediate, and advanced, there will be two brackets, an A bracket for people who have been to a Kurtamen before, and a B bracket for people who had no idea what they were doing. And we clearly belonged in the B bracket because we'd never done it before. And we were like, off we go to the B bracket. But the B bracket would only send one team to semifinals, while the A bracket would send eight teams to semifinals. Yeah. You can all do math. So after the lecture, they say, "Hold on a minute. One of the teams from the A bracket isn't here.

• 18:11Speaker 03

  Would one of the teams from the B bracket like to join the A bracket?" And we looked at each other and we were like, eight is greater than one. So we were like, "We will join the A bracket, please." So we switch. And we're like, high-fiving ourselves about this decision that we've made. And we skip along off to our first round, where we meet our first challengers, Acton Boxborough. Acton Boxborough is the name of their school. Just think about that. Five syllables. So many syllables. You know it has to be pretentious. And they were. Their team was comprised of a junior and a senior in the novice division. And we're in eighth grade.

• 18:55Speaker 03

  And the senior is flirting with the moderator, because the moderator is just like a sophomore at Yale. So, yeah. So he's like, "Oh, who's your favorite Roman poet?" And she's like, "I like Ovid." And he's like, "Ovid? I love Ovid." And I'm just looking at my friends like, "Ovid? I've never read Ovid. I'm still stuck on book two of the Cambridge Latin course." A great read if you ever have the chance. So that's round one. But we actually do pretty well in round one.

• 19:37Speaker 03

  So round two, our fiercest competitors yet, Oak Hall. Only two syllables, but one of the syllables is "hall." So just contemplate that. And they're buzzing in before the questions are finished. It's like, "In what year did the emperor [bleep] 123 A.D.? What's the ablative singular form of [bleep] pane?" And it's like, how did they know? And the reason they know is because they have a coach, Adam. And Adam, he ties his long hair back in a ponytail. And he wears this flannel.

• 20:21Speaker 03

  And he stares those children dead in the eyes. And God forbid, they should get a question wrong, because then Adam has something to say about it. He goes, "Um, excuse me, but actually, in Virgil's Aeneid, Book One, line 324, he uses the alternative poetic form of the word, which is the form that Keegan answered with." Keegan is your name if you go to Oak Hall, I guess. So Keegan deserves to be awarded those points. And what is this moderator going to do?

• 21:06Speaker 03

  She's like 19 and it's the middle of a Saturday afternoon. So she's just like, "Yeah, I guess." So Oak Hall thrashes us. But the preliminaries end. And we actually feel pretty good about our score. And we're like, looking at each other and we're like, "We think we're going to make it to semis." And we're looking at our chocolate and we're like, "We're going to eat you." And we're just waiting for them to post the scores. And we're waiting and we're waiting. And we're like, eighth place or better, eighth place or better, eighth place or better. And they post the scores. And we were in ninth place. I know! I know!

• 21:49Speaker 03

  And the worst part, the most, the worst part is, we looked at our score and we looked at the top score from the B bracket. And yeah, you can guess. Our score was higher than the top score in the B bracket. So had we remained in the B bracket, we would have advanced to semifinals. Ugh. And my Latin teacher is like, "Ninth out of 18. That's pretty good. Let's get back on the train." And we're like, "Not good enough." And we're looking at each other. And we're looking at that chocolate.

• 22:30Speaker 03

  And we're like, "Oh, we didn't deserve this chocolate. But I'll be damned if we didn't eat it anyway." And we swore that next time, we would earn it. Thank you.

• 22:48Speaker 00

  That was Romi Negren. Romi told this story when she was a senior in high school. Since then, her Latin skills have propelled her to dizzying heights, culminating in not one, but two degrees in medieval history. Incidentally, she tells us that she is currently unemployed. Romi says that she is a prolific reader, a mediocre baker, and a terrible athlete. That brings us to the end of our episode. We hope that no matter where they came from, the lessons you learned stay with you.

• 23:18Speaker 04

  Michelle Jalowski is a director at The Moth, where she helps people shape their stories for stages all over the world. Romi Negren's story was directed by Catherine McCarthy. Stories from the education program, like Romi Negren's, are possible with the gracious support of unlikely collaborators. To learn more about The Moth's work with students and teachers, please visit themoth.org. This episode of The Moth Podcast was produced by Sarah Austin Jenness, Sarah Jane Johnson, and me, Mark Sollinger. The rest of The Moth's leadership team includes Gina Duncan, Christina Norman, Marina Kluchay, Jennifer Hickson, Jordan Cardinalle, Caledonia Cairns, Kate Tellers, Suzanne Rust, and Patricia

• 24:03Speaker 04

  Uranya. The Moth Podcast is presented by Odyssey. Special thanks to their executive producer, Leah Reese Dennis. All Moth stories are true, as remembered by their storytellers. For more about our podcast, information on pitching your own story, and everything else, go to our website, themoth.org.