Taking Risks: The Moth Radio Hour

This episode originally aired on January 3rd, 2023. In this hour, stories of diving in head first and putting it all on the line. Unconventional gifts, apex predators, and stock car racing. This episode is hosted by Moth producer and director Jodi Powell. The Moth Radio Hour is produced by The Moth and Jay Allison of Atlantic Public Media. Storytellers: Andrew McGill learns more about his father than he bargained for. Aspiring primate veterinarian Estella Z Jones has a shift in perspective about her own life after seeing animals in the wild. Ashamed of not knowing how to ride a bike, Francesca Hays attempts to learn in secret. Michael Corso enters a stock car race for blind drivers. Podcast # 798

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• 1:08Speaker 01

  This is the Moth Radio Hour. I'm your host, Jodie Powell. In this hour, stories of taking risks.

• 1:17Speaker 01

  A few months ago, I said yes to swimming lessons. I would have two weeks of lessons where I would actually blow bubbles, float, tread water, the whole nine yards. I was terrified. The thought of water engulfing my body was horrifying. Yes, I grew up on an island and I love to be near the water, but in the water is quite a different thing. So I set out to my lessons, goggles and swim cap in hand, with a very trusted instructor. And after two weeks, I have discovered that I love being underwater, but I hate the bubbles. And the coordination escapes me. But the wagers have been set. I will keep at it, though my inner voice never fails to say,

• 2:01Speaker 01

  "What are you doing?" I hear that and then I jump in anyway.

• 2:07Speaker 01

  In this hour, stories of taking chances, going the extra mile, beating the odds and making small moments visible or lifelong dreams come true.

• 2:20Speaker 01

  Our first storyteller, Andrew McGill, takes a chance in a taxicab. Live in Hawaii, where we partnered with the Hawaii Theater Center, here's Andrew.

• 2:29Speaker 02

  Thank you. Hey, everybody.

• 2:34Speaker 02

  So, growing up, the best way I could describe my mom was like LeBron James in his 2006 season in the Cavaliers. Literally, the MVP for my brother, my sister, and myself. She did everything. Whereas my dad was like the rest of the Cavaliers team that year. Wasn't really around, wasn't really present. And just like LeBron left the Cavs, my mom left my dad, but she took the kids with her. So, I never really had my dad growing up in the house, and he was always this mysterious enigma to me, this mysterious figure. And I remember asking my sister, "What was one memory she has of our dad in the house?" And she said, "He told her not to get involved in credit cards." She was 12, y'all. She was 12.

• 3:18Speaker 02

  But she said she has impeccable credit now, so I don't know, something might have stuck. And my dad was this mysterious guy, but I really only knew two things about him. One was that he was a New York City taxi driver, and he drove a yellow taxicab. And two was that anytime he would show up, he would always have a gift. Now, my brother and sister were a little older, so they didn't really mess around with him too much. So, that meant I automatically got the gift. And the visits would always be the same. He'd call the house, say, "I'm on my way." And then we'd hear him honking his horn from the fourth floor of our apartment. I would run downstairs, go into the front seat of his taxi. It'd always smell like, you know, whatever food he was eating in his cologne. And he would give me the gift.

• 4:02Speaker 02

  And the gifts were always different. Sometime it'd be shoes that didn't really fit too well. Sometime he gave me a fedora. I love fedoras. Another time, he gave me a Star David necklace. I don't practice, but it was cool.

• 4:21Speaker 02

  It was cool. And, but the best gift he gave me was a PS2 with this game Batman Vengeance. And I was, from that day, I was like, yo, my dad can do no wrong.

• 4:31Speaker 02

  In our house, he had a lot of names. My brother and sister said he was crazy. My mom said he was a deadbeat, but I was like, no, he's the dude that gave me the PS2. That's my guy. That's my dude. And I would defend him at home, but I would also defend him at school when kids are talking crap. And kids would be like, yo, my dad is faster than your dad. And I'm like, not on the streets of Brooklyn, he's not. My dad be moving through those streets in his car, man. He knows how to make that left turn.

• 4:57Speaker 02

  And he's like, yo, my dad will beat up your dad. And I'm like, yeah, but my dad knows where the nearest hospital is, so he'll get medical attention faster than your dad. And then, my friend said this one thing that really got me. He's like, at least my dad is around. I've never seen your dad. He's not at the PTA meetings. He don't pick you up. Where is he? And I went home that day and I felt weird and I called my dad up and I was like, hey, what do you have? You got anything for me? And he's like, yeah, I got something. And he pulls up and I, you know, he comes, we're here to honk in. I go down, sit in the front, and I want to ask him. I want to say, hey, man, where have you been? Like, why aren't you there to pick me up for PTA meetings? Like, where are you?

• 5:41Speaker 02

  But I didn't say any of that. And he says, hey, I got this for you. And he hands me this gift. And he says, you good? And I say, yeah, I'm good. And I walk out the car and I like to examine the gifts to see if they're cool. And I look at this and it says brown wallet. And I'm looking at it and I open it up and there's someone else's money, ID, credit card.

• 6:05Speaker 02

  And I look back at the car and I wave him down. He lowers the window. I was like, hey, I think this is someone else's wallet. And he's like, nah, that's for you. That's yours. And I was like, okay, cool.

• 6:17Speaker 02

  And he drives off and I'm making my way back upstairs and I'm like, "Has my dad been giving me things that people have left in the back of his cab as gifts?"

• 6:27Speaker 02

  And I get back in the house and I get to my room and I start looking at all the things that he's given me and I was like, "And he's made me an accessory to all of his crimes?" I was like, "I'm gonna go to jail. Look at all this stuff."

• 6:41Speaker 02

  And I was, I was like, "Oh man, what am I gonna do? I can't go to prison now. Too young." So I do what I always do when I get overwhelmed. I just took a nap.

• 6:52Speaker 02

  And as I'm, I'm taking a nap, I have this dream where I'm sitting at the front of the, I'm at the front of this line, I'm about to pay for something and I pull out the wallet and someone behind me is like, "Yo, that's my wallet." And we have a scuffle over the wallet and I wake up and I'm like, "I gotta get rid of all this stuff." So I take all the contents in the wallet, I put it in an envelope and I was like, "I'm just gonna mail this away." I take the shoes, the fedora, all the random things that he gave me. And I wish I could tell y'all that I threw away that PS2, um, but I didn't. I did feel bad every time I turned it on. I did feel bad every time I played Batman. It was tough. It was tough for me. And I didn't talk to my dad for a long time. And, uh, I, I was going on a trip. I was planning to go on this trip.

• 7:35Speaker 02

  And it was one of those trips where we have everything planned. You know where you're going. You have like the itinerary of like, "Oh, I'm gonna eat here. I'm gonna do this." Um, but something fell through with my ride going to the airport. And I was telling my mom this and she's like, "Yo, just call your dad." And I was like, "Nah, I'm good. I'll figure it out." And before I could know, she, she has him on the phone. And then a couple of minutes later, I hear the honking and I'm like, "Ah, I guess I'm gonna take this ride." And I go downstairs, but instead of sitting in the front of the taxi, I sit in the back. And the back was different than the front. Didn't smell like his food. It didn't smell like his cologne. It smelled like a night out, like drinking and like smoking cigarettes. And we're, we, we take off and he's listening to his music and it's silent.

• 8:20Speaker 02

  In my, I feel like it's silent and I'm, I'm like, "I gotta say something. I gotta break this tension." I don't know if it was curiosity or fear, but I was like, "Hey man, did you always wanna be a taxi driver?" And I thought he would just ignore the question and keep listening to his music. But to my surprise, he like lowers the music. And he's like, "No, I didn't want to be a taxi driver. I wanted to be a musician." And I was like, "Word? What music do you like?" And he turns up the music a little more and it's like this Haitian compa music. And it's these beautiful drums and these guitars. And I was like, "Were you good?" And he's like, "No, I was terrible." I was like, "Word?" He's like, "Yeah, I wanted..." And he proceeds to tell me this story about how his dad was a chicken farmer. And he didn't want to be a chicken farmer. So, once him and my mom got married, he moved to Berlin, pursued music.

• 9:05Speaker 02

  He failed at that. And he was like, "Oh, I'm just gonna become a tailor." And then when they came to the States, because they were looking for new opportunities, he couldn't find a job as a tailor, so he started working as a taxi driver. And he's been doing that ever since for about 35 years. And he turned back the music up. And for the first time, I could actually like see my father. And I didn't see him as a, you know, my dad. I didn't see him as the son of a chicken farmer. I didn't see him as a failed musician, but I saw him as a person. And I started to think about those gifts that he gave me or the things that he gave me from the back of the cab. And I was like, "He could've just kept all those things, but he gave them to me." And I realized that maybe it was his way of saying,

• 9:48Speaker 02

  "Hey, I don't have a lot, but this is what I have for you." I thought, "Maybe it was his way of saying, 'Hey, I'm sorry that I wasn't around.'" And maybe it was his way of saying, "Hey, I love you." So, we pull up to the airport and I take my stuff out and I'm walking into the terminal. And then I hear him honk his horn. He pulls down his window. He's like, "Hey, you want these headphones?" And I take them. "Thank you."

• 10:28Speaker 01

  Andrew McGill is an educator, stand-up comedian, and storyteller who lives in Brooklyn but loves to travel, and especially loved being in Hawaii to tell the story you just heard.

• 10:41Speaker 01

  Andrew says that wasn't the last time his father offered him a gift. Recent ones included a fedora, church shoes, and a baseball glove. Andrew is urging everyone to take a last look before leaving your taxi.

• 10:59Speaker 01

  Do you have a story to tell us? You can pitch us your story by recording it right on our site, themoth.org.

• 11:06Speaker 03

  It was Sunday, July 13, 1969. And as my parents were driving us back to our home in Montreal, we were talking about the upcoming launch of Apollo 11 on Wednesday. Everyone was talking about it. It was the biggest news of the year, and I had been captivated by this race to the moon since I was about seven. The next morning, my mom woke me up and said, "If you really want to go, Dad and I will pay for your airplane ticket." For one proviso, I had to find someone to go with me. I called my two best friends, and when I explained what my plan was, they both spoke to their mothers and quickly came back on the phone with me. My mom says, "No way." I guess I shouldn't have been surprised. I'd just turned 14, looked about 10. My parents miraculously said I could do the trip solo. That type of permission day would probably get them landed in jail, but I guess it was a different time back then.

• 11:50Speaker 03

  Anyway, my plan was to hitchhike the 50 or so miles from Orlando to Titusville, sleep on the beach. The news reports were talking about a million people lined up for miles, so I certainly wouldn't lack for company. Watch the launch, hitchhike back to Orlando and fly home. When I was changing planes in JFK and carrying a sign saying, "To the moon, Kate Kennedy or bust", a man came over to chat with me. His name was Arthur C. Johnson. He lived in Titusville, and he worked for one of the contractors in the Apollo program. That chance meeting resulted in my being invited into his home in Titusville to stay with his family for four days, a front-page story in the local newspaper about my trip, and a thrilling, unforgettable view of the beginning of one humankind's greatest adventures. The only time in my life I actually saw history in the making,

• 12:34Speaker 03

  a memory that hasn't dimmed for almost 50 years.

• 12:37Speaker 01

  Remember, you can pitch us at themoth.org, where you can also share these stories or others from the Moth Archive.

• 12:48Speaker 01

  Coming up, risky moments from a trip across the world to an animal kingdom and an early morning bicycle lesson, when The Moth Radio Hour continues.

• 13:05Speaker 04

  The Moth Radio Hour is produced by Atlantic Public Media in Woods Hole, Massachusetts.

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• 16:14Speaker 01

  This is the Moth Radio Hour. I'm Jodi Powell. Our next story about taking risks in life was told by Dr. Estella Jones. She told this in Troy, New York, at the Troy Savings Bank Music Hall. Here's Estella.

• 16:37Speaker 07

  Thank you. I was born into a world of poverty, where my parents weren't even allowed to vote. My mother scrubbed floors.

• 16:47Speaker 05

  On her hands and knees, just so I could learn to play the piano. And my dad served as an aide to a one-star general, which meant that he kept his shoes polished for the general. Forever since I could remember, and my mom says, from four-years-old, all I ever talked about was wanting to be an animal doctor. No one told me I couldn't do it, but my neighborhood said something different. See, I was in a public school in Columbus, Ohio, that had, that was built for 700 students,

• 17:30Speaker 05

  but it housed 1,600 students. And at 12, I have to admit, I was going down the wrong path. I had a teacher by the name of Dr. Charles Tennant, and he noticed it. And he really pulled me off of the wrong road. He said, "You can do better, and remember, nothing is impossible unless you succumb to it." So I remembered that. And by age 14, I had turned everything around, and I won a scholarship to a school right

• 18:06Speaker 05

  here in Troy, New York, called Emma Willard. So, Emma Willard was great fun. I graduated, you know, leaving home at 14, a lot of responsibility, you grow up fast. But I still had to figure out a way to work my way through undergrad, and I had a lot of jobs. And, uh, I can't name them all, but to name a few, bartender, skycap, and when I was working as a slaughter inspector...

• 18:41Speaker 07

  I met Dr. John Malone, who was collecting tissues at the slaughterhouse. And he said, "Estelle, you really need to apply to vet school in Louisiana." That's where I was working. He said, "You can go to vet school. I don't see you doing this as a career." So, you know, a little fear took over because I knew the odds of getting in vet school were 10 to 1 at that time. But I applied, and I got in. And in vet school, we were doing so many amazing things at LSU because they have a wonderful exotic animal medicine department. And it was at that time, I said, "I am going to be a primate veterinarian after I graduate.

• 19:25Speaker 07

  I'm going to specialize in primate medicine." Then we got an invitation to go to the Baton Rouge Zoo to do a polar bear root canal.

• 19:38Speaker 07

  So I don't know how many of you have ever done a polar bear root canal. So the zoo vet comes out, and he scares the life out of us. He goes, "Look, the drugs we use here, you students aren't even allowed near them because one little finger prick and you're dead. A polar bear will see you as a snack, so don't let them wake up." You know, we got these kind of instructions. And then I thought, "Oh, boy, where's my career going?" And the primates, they looked a little sad. They were in cages. And I said, "Wow, I wonder what it would be to work with them in their environment, not in the zoo environment." So at that moment, I said, "You know what?

• 20:21Speaker 07

  I'm going to go study primate medicine in Africa, in their environment." Okay, crazy, right? Here I am, a student with no money. I have a little girl. I started vet school when she was 14 months old, and I was married. And I had a difficult marriage.

• 20:42Speaker 07

  So, my ex-husband, at the time now ex, followed me around with a gun in his car and was leaving threatening death threats on my car windows. So my daughter's safety was my very first priority. How am I gonna get her safe if I can make this trip? I wrote to this place called Institute for Primate Research. They wrote me back and said, "If you can get here, sure you can do your perceptorship here." So I called my family in Ohio. They said, "Sure, we'll take your daughter." She was three by then. "And we'll watch after her while you're in Africa." So, how I got there? I used all my Skycat miles

• 21:27Speaker 07

  to fly to Africa and back. So, I'm on this plane, of course, the flight is very long. I'm sitting next to this reporter. The whole time, we're chattering. And she was so cool. But when that plane landed, she exclaimed, "Oh my God, I can't believe we're in Africa." And I said, "Oh my goodness, this is really surreal." So, I get to IPR. It's very beautiful. They take me to my hut that I'm gonna live in while I'm there. And it had running water and a thatch roof. So that night, I go to bed and I'm still excited under my mosquito net. And I hear these loud thunks on my roof

• 22:10Speaker 07

  just jumps and pounding all night long. So I really couldn't sleep. And I'm like, "What is that? I'm not gonna go outside and look, right?" So, the next morning, a few employees came to pick me up to walk me to work. And down this dirt road, and they said, "Look, that's just the wild primates. And, you know, they're having fun and they're looking for food. You know, we hear that all the time." I said, "Okay." Uh, then I saw this fence along where we were walking, and it had holes in it. And I said, "What's that?" And they said, "Ah, that's just the national park next door. And occasionally, you know, an animal strays over here.

• 22:51Speaker 07

  Usually it's old lions and they're looking for slow prey." I said, "Okay." And then they said, "Oh yeah, that's why we walk to work together. And we advise you, when you walk to work, don't walk to work with people who are faster than you."

• 23:08Speaker 07

  They weren't kidding. So, IPR really educated me, showed me a good time. I worked with conservationists, I worked in tropical medicine. They let me rotate through the whole facility, pathologists, and they were doing some really cool research. Then I remembered I had this note from the curator at the Baton Rouge Zoo. He said, "You need to look up my friend, Mr. Don Hunt, when you get to Africa." I was in southern Africa, in Kenya, Nairobi. Mr. Hunt was in Nanyuki, which is central Kenya. So I call him up on the phone, and he goes, "Sure, you can come here and visit my conservatory, as long as you find a way here."

• 23:53Speaker 07

  So I found a way there. I jumped on that public bus, and I was off, you know, in my little trench coat, looking weird. But, um, when I got to the conservatory, Mr. Hunt showed me the best of the world. I was given a guest house, this time with a pitcher window so wide, and you could see all the animals in the conservatory, a 1,200 acres. It's beautiful. But I stood in that window, and I had an epiphany. I said, "Wow, physicians are responsible for one species, male and female. All the rest of the burden falls on the veterinarian,

• 24:38Speaker 07

  and no two species are alike, and no two zebras are even alike." So, we would go out in the evening in Mr. Hunt's Jeeps and look for sick animals, antelope, deer, gazelle, you know, anything that was injured and distressed, and we would treat it. Then one evening, he said... Have you ever been on safari, Estella? I said, "No." He said, "I'm going to send you on your first safari." Wow, I was so excited. So he did that, even though I didn't really know what a safari was. And when I got on safari and saw the beauty,

• 25:21Speaker 07

  we were in a little jeep when we went to the wilderness. Now, I knew what it was like to be caged. And they were free. And their environment, that did something for my heart. Even though it's dangerous, tour guides were excellent. They knew the land, they were local. And then, you know, they educated me about the deadly species of snakes. I saw mother elephants with their young under their belly. That's where they stand over them to protect them from the sun. And I thought about my daughter that I had to protect. So the animal kingdom is a lot like our kingdom. But I also felt that they were free.

• 26:06Speaker 07

  And even though it's not always safe, they knew freedom. So when I came back from Africa, I had a sense of taking my freedom back. Because I left afraid. And I was no longer afraid of that bully ex-husband. I passed the freedom for my daughter on to be whatever she wanted to be. So remember I told you my dad wants to shine the one-star general shoes? Well, he lived to see me become the first black female veterinary one-star admiral in the US Public Health Service

• 26:51Speaker 07

  and assistant surgeon general.

• 27:04Speaker 07

  So, you know, I found that teacher in 7th grade. I went back. I hadn't talked to him for 45 years. And I told him, "Thank you." If you have a teacher like that, find him and say, "Thank you." And what I now have my dad's shoes, because I lost my dad last year to COVID. But he saw me pin on that star, and he was so proud. So I now am wearing the shoes that he once polished. And I'm going to pass these shoes on to those who once thought their dreams were impossible. Thank you.

• 27:54Speaker 01

  That was Dr. Estella Jones. She is the first Black female veterinarian in the U.S. Public Health Service to be promoted to the rank of Rear Admiral and the role of Assistant Surgeon General. As Deputy Director of the Office of Counterterrorism and Emerging Threats at the FDA, Jones works to combat global health crises.

• 28:18Speaker 01

  Estella's father sadly succumbed to COVID in 2021. So she says her work in the fight against disease is never done.

• 28:29Speaker 01

  Estella says it's important to remain humble. And if she sees a little further, it is because she's standing on the shoulders of giants. Estella is still in touch with her teacher from junior high, and she uses every opportunity she gets to remind everyone to pick up the phone, write a note to someone who helped you to find the right path.

• 28:56Speaker 01

  Our next story is from Francesca Hays, who told this at the Bronx Museum of Arts in New York City, where WNYC is a media partner of The Moth. Here's Francesca.

• 29:10Speaker 05

  It was my deepest, darkest secret, and it was one that got more and more shameful with every passing year. I was 22, and I didn't know how to ride a bicycle. And nobody knew this about me, because I kept it secret. I didn't want anyone to find out my shameful secret. And I avoided bikes at all costs, so no one really did. And I didn't think about it very often, but that spring, I was in college, and I would walk to campus, and I would see classmates whizzing past me on their bikes. And I was jealous that they were getting there so quickly. And I thought to myself, "Maybe I could learn, ha ha ha." And then I thought, "Well, maybe I could learn. Maybe it's possible." And then it became kind of like an obsession, that I wanted to learn how to ride a bicycle.

• 29:53Speaker 05

  But it was a quiet obsession, because I couldn't tell anyone, because they couldn't know in the first place that I didn't know. So I started this process that I coined: Observation, Simulation, and Visualization. So I would observe people on bikes, to figure out the mechanics and how it worked. And I would simulate riding a bike, on a stationary bike in the college campus gym. And I had read in Cosmopolitan magazine, very credible source, that if you visualize yourself doing something, you're like 10 times more likely to do it. So every night, I fell asleep, imagining myself on a bike, just flying into campus, riding straight into the classroom.

• 30:31Speaker 05

  And I did this for a while, and I thought to myself, "Well, I'm the only adult I know who doesn't know how to ride a bike, but there have to be other people out there." And that's like what the internet is for, is to find other weird people, like yourself. And so I went online, and lo and behold, there was a forum of adult bike learners. And I learned a lot from them. The first thing I learned is they had like great reasons for not They were from like war torn countries where they didn't have bicycles um in their childhood or they had been a part of very conservative religions where girls couldn't ride bikes and now they wanted to learn. I had no good reason and I just felt more ashamed but I got um I got good tips from them like to use a little bit of a hill and that gravity would help balance the bike and to use a bike that was a little bit too

• 31:14Speaker 05

  small for you. And I realized I really had to get on a bike. Um so I needed to tell someone because I had to get a bike. Um so I selected my friend Carol because I think any young person named Carol is a trustworthy person. And she is. Um and she's also that friend that just takes care of things. Like she just can handle it. And so kind of in one breath, I confessed to her that I didn't know how to ride a bike and I wanted to learn. I told her about the online people and what they said. And she said, okay, I'll come by tomorrow. I didn't really know what that meant. Um but she showed up the next day just like a Carol would. And um with her, she had a big, huge, purple, enormous helmet, and the littlest turquoise bike I've ever seen. It was a mongoose and it had the words

• 31:58Speaker 05

  Little Thunder splashed across the top tube. And I knew that this was my chance. I looked at Little Thunder and I thought, okay, we're doing this. Um so the next night that was warm and dry, I took out Little Thunder and the purple helmet because I promised Carol and, you know, you keep a promise to someone named Carol. And I went to the slope because the online people said so. And I put one foot on the pedal on Little Thunder and I cruised down and I balanced and it was actually really easy. And I was kind of surprised. So I did that a few more times. And then I put both feet on the pedals and I was still balancing and I was shocked. And so then I thought, well, the next time I do this, I'm just gonna pedal and see what happens. And to my surprise, when you pedal on a bike,

• 32:42Speaker 05

  it just balances all by itself and you don't have to do anything. And you're riding a bike. If you're pedaling the bike. So all of a sudden, I was riding a bike. And I was like, oh my god, I'm riding a bike. And I was laughing and I was kind of crying and I said out loud to myself, I'm riding a bike. And it's also three o'clock in the morning because- I am 5'9", 150 pounds, 22 years old. I cannot have people see me with the purple helmet on the tiny turquoise bike. I can't let anyone see this process. So I finally got it, there's no one out there. I feel at 22 the way a 5-year-old looks when they're learning how to ride a bike. I felt so free. I thought there was something stuck in my helmet.

• 33:27Speaker 05

  And then I realized it was the sound of wind passing my face. I'd never heard that before. It was so exciting. But I was kind of wild out there because I'd never done this before. So my steering was all over the place. And I didn't know how to stop because Carol, bless her heart, didn't tell me those levers were brakes. So when I wanted to stop, when I was getting close to the bigger street, I would just skid with my sneakers and that wouldn't really do it. So I would just hurl myself off the bike and just bail completely. And I'm sure I was getting hurt, but I didn't care. My adrenaline was like... Pain was no match for my adrenaline. I was on cloud nine. And it was fine that I was so wild out there on that path, just kind of careening around because it was so late and there was no one else out.

• 34:12Speaker 05

  Except for then, there was someone else out. And there was a guy on his bike coming towards me and he was helmet-free and looking really in control. And I'm on Little Thunder with the purple helmet. And he's coming towards me and I realized I don't know how to steer at all. So I'm just praying that I don't crash into him. And we pass each other and we don't crash, thank God. But under his breath, he says to me, "You know, if you're that drunk, you shouldn't be riding a bike."

• 34:40Speaker 05

  I realized in that moment, that hipster bike police guy was my first witness and he said I was riding a bike and I was doing it. And I burst into tears, happy tears, because this asshole had told me I was riding a bike, so that meant I really was. And I realized that with the help of online strangers and a friend named Carol and Little Thunder, I found my balance. And I've never stopped riding since.

• 35:13Speaker 01

  Francesca Hays said her experience set her on a new path to become a teacher. She went on to work for Byte New York and taught over a thousand adults in the city how to ride a bicycle. Francesca currently works in educational equity and lives in her hometown of Seattle, Washington. She rides a steel celestial blue Pista 7 Bianchi 9 bicycle for the last 12 years and hopes to never replace it. In a moment, we are off to the racetrack. That's when The Moth Radio Hour continues.

• 35:59Speaker 04

  The Moth Radio Hour is produced by Atlantic Public Media in Woods Hole, Massachusetts.

• 36:07Speaker 00

  Today's episode is brought to you by Vinted. We've all got that designated chair or corner in the bedroom piled high with clothes we keep telling ourselves we'll definitely wear but never actually do. My pile has reached critical mass and it's past time for decisive action. Declutter or bust? Thankfully, I just learned about Vinted, a secondhand marketplace app that makes it easy to give your pre-loved fashion a second life and earn some extra cash in the process. Snapping photos and listing my pieces on Vinted can fit right into my afternoon routine without any hassle. The whole process is simple. Once an item sells, Vinted creates the prepaid shipping label for you, taking all the headache out of shipping things out. And there are no seller fees, so every bit of profit goes straight into your bank account

• 36:51Speaker 00

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• 37:05Speaker 06

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• 37:36Speaker 01

  You're listening to the Moth Radio Hour. I'm Jody Powell. Our final story about risk is told by Michael Corso, another storyteller from the event in Troy, New York, at the Troy Savings Bank Music Hall. Here's Michael.

• 37:58Speaker 06

  When I was a little kid, I was a really active child. I used to run and jump and climb, everything and anything. But when I sat down to watch television, my parents recognized that I had a hard time seeing the screen. And over time, I was inching closer and closer and closer in order to see the TV.

• 38:24Speaker 06

  Of course, they took me to the eye doctor, and then I had to go to some specialists. And then ultimately, I was diagnosed with an incurable eye disease called retinoschisis, which means the splitting of the retina.

• 38:40Speaker 06

  Unfortunately, on my 12th birthday, I woke up totally blind. It caused a lot of stress in my family and in my household. Some directed it at me.

• 38:56Speaker 06

  But I was worried as a 12-year-old. Am I going to be able to play with my friends? That's all I cared about. A little while after my going blind, my friends and I were hanging down the street, as usual. And they said, "Hey, why don't we play Evel Knievel?" Any of you remember Evel Knievel?

• 39:20Speaker 06

  He was the crazy lunatic that would drive a car 150 miles an hour and jump on a ramp and go over 25 cars and break 100 bones in his body.

• 39:31Speaker 06

  But we wanted to do that. So, my friends were setting up the ramps and we were gonna jump garbage cans. I went down to my house and pulled out my bicycle, which I hadn't ridden in a while. And I come back to the area where we're playing and one of my friends says, "Are you crazy? What are you gonna do?" And I said, "Oh, man, I'm gonna try this." I'm sorry, everybody thought I was nuts. I just forgot to think the same way as my friends. So I get my bike set, it's my turn, I race as hard as I can, Frankie says, "Now!" I lift up the handlebars, I jump over the garbage cans, I land on the down ramp with my front wheel, but not quite with my back wheel.

• 40:16Speaker 06

  And I blew the whole ramp out. Face down I go onto the concrete. My friends come running over to see if I'm okay, they turn me over and I'm hysterically laughing. "How much fun was that?" I said.

• 40:36Speaker 06

  Well, I lived. A couple of years later, I got to have some more fun. When I was about fifteen or sixteen, I went out to Long Island to see my cousins. They were motorheads. And what they did was raced their muscle cars at National Speedway. And they invited me to come and hang with them in the pit. And I was in total excitement because I love cars and I love their cars. One of my cousins had a sixty-nine Roadrunner with a 383 engine. My other cousin had a sixty-seven Chevelle SS with a 427.

• 41:16Speaker 06

  One cousin that I didn't like too much had a Plymouth Gold Duster with a 340 engine. And my least favorite had the best car. An Alstomville 442 Fire Engine Red convertible.

• 41:32Speaker 06

  And I got to hang out in the pit with them and I got to smell the gas and smell the rubber burning and be part of the chaos and the excitement and the fun. But the one thing that I always did in that pit, wonder and think, "Oh my God, all I really want to do is race one of those cars." Well, of course, that's not possible, so my dreams stayed somewhere tucked inside and I went on. When I was 18, I moved on to go to college. I moved from a small town called Brooklyn to the metropolis of Albany. While I was in college, I still wanted to keep my adventures and my activities, so

• 42:16Speaker 06

  I learned how to downhill ski. I then learned how to tandem rally bicycle race. And then, yes, folks, I learned how to play golf. Now, you wonder, "How does a blind guy hit a little ball into a little hole 400 yards away?" I wondered the same thing. And I found out, it ain't easy to do. But what kept me going was all my sighted friends couldn't do it either.

• 43:01Speaker 06

  And then, I was 40 years old, in the middle of my career, and out of the blue, the phone rings and it's my friend Marty. And he's all hyperventilating. And he said, "Hey, do you have a radio in the office?" I said, "Yes." And he said, "Turn it on." I'm like, "Why? I'm working." He's like, "Oh, no, forget it. You gotta turn on the radio." He said, "I'm driving into work and I'm listening to Pix 106 and Bob Wolf is having a fundraiser called the IROC 500. EYE 500." "Oh, what a cool name, but what are they gonna do?" He said, "It's gonna be a stock car race for 14 blind drivers."

• 43:47Speaker 06

  I'm like, "How the hell are they gonna do that?" And he said, "Call them, call them, they're on number 11, they only have room for three more people."

• 43:57Speaker 06

  I hang up the phone. I start going back to my computer, I can't think about it. I'm like, "Are they kidding? That is friggin' nuts." It's gonna be a demolition derby.

• 44:14Speaker 06

  I pause, and I can't wait, I just grab the phone. I dial 476 WPYX, and the guy, the guy actually answered the phone. I never got a busy signal, which I never had happen before. And I said, "Hi, my name is Michael and I'm blind." He didn't even say anything, he just shot me into the studio, live. And I'm talking to Bob Wolf, John and Ellen, live. And they're interviewing me about being a driver in this race. And I'm like, answering the questions, and next thing I know, Bob Wolf says, "Okay, you're in." "Hang on, we're gonna get your contact information, and we'll see you at race day."

• 44:53Speaker 06

  I hang up the phone, I scratch my head, and I say, "What the hell did I just do?"

• 45:02Speaker 06

  It's race day. And all the drivers and their support teams, along with the officials from the track, are in the infield, and we're getting huddled up for a little quick meeting, where the track officials are gonna tell us the rules. First rule, it's a fundraiser. F-U-N-razor. You don't get hurt, don't do anything crazy, we're just gonna have fun. So, every one of you blind drivers are gonna be paired up with a professional stock car driver. And I wondered, "Can they see?"

• 45:42Speaker 06

  We met and we learned that the place was gonna be packed. They usually get a hundred people at the raceway and fondue the speedway. And they're all motorheads or mechanics and drivers. No one else goes. This day, for the IROC 500, they had 6,000 spectators. We're all excited and nervous and we go to our cars. Everybody picked a number so you would get your car assignment. My car assignment was 12. I was so bummed because that meant I was in the back row. In the front, it was 1, 2, and 3, and in the back, it was 12, 13, and 14.

• 46:26Speaker 06

  I wanna win this damn thing and there's no chance sitting in the back. It's just not gonna work. So, we're in the car. We hear the announcement, "Start your engines." Everybody turns the key. I hear the engines going. And the gun goes off and the race is on. The race is on, but we're not moving. And I say, "Jake, what's going on? How come we're not moving?" He says, "Well, it's a bit of a cluster. Everybody's in front of you trying to figure out what to do. There's left turns and right turns and spins going on. Just wait, you'll get your turn." Oh my God. I said, "I don't believe this.

• 47:10Speaker 06

  I'm sitting, stuck, behind a bunch of blind people that don't know how to drive." Then I hear engines behind me. And if you know about stock cars at all, one of the features is they don't have any glass, which keeps it safer. Glass is the thing that could really hurt. There's no windshield, there's no rear windshield, there's no side windows, and there's no headlights. Not that I would need them if I had them.

• 47:42Speaker 06

  But I hear engines behind me and I said, "Jake, what's those engines? What is that?" And he looks behind and he says, "Oh, that's cars one, two, and three. They made the first lap." "Jake, we didn't even move yet." I was so bummed. "It's a four-lap race." And I'm down one lap. "It's my turn to go." He says, "Okay, you can start going." I step on the gas and the gas pedal doesn't move much. And we're crawling and I said, "Jake, what's going on with this gas pedal? I'm trying to move and it's not going." And he says, "Every car has a governor underneath the gas pedal. It's a block of wood, so you stay at a reasonable hour.

• 48:25Speaker 06

  Remember fundraiser?" I said, "Oh." Something else? I took my foot, I kicked underneath the block and I knocked it out. I put the car in neutral, I rev it up. Jake says, "You're sick." I said, "No, no, I just want to win." I've got the whole car now and I'm so excited. I said, "Jake, just tell me where to go. Tell me exactly the directions, I will pay attention." He's like, "Oh, my God, this is not the rules." I said, "What rules? No one told me I couldn't kick the block out from under the gas pedal? They didn't even tell us we had that."

• 49:10Speaker 06

  He says, "Okay, go left. Go left, go a little right, go a little left." "Oh, my God," he goes, "you're responding beautifully." I said, "Of course I am. What do you think I want to do? Kill myself?" But guess what? He was definitely pooping his pants. But I was going to be smart and then listen to him and do my best. So I tell him, "Where do we go? Where do we go? Come on, I want to win." He says, "Go left, go left, go right, straighten it out, straighten it out. You had a clear path. Go." He says, "Go, go, go. You're doing great. Go, go, go." I'm flying past a bunch of cars. He says, "Michael, go into the right. Now, straighten it out.

• 49:51Speaker 06

  Okay, you're in the middle of the track and you just passed a shitload of cars." And I'm like psyched. And we're going, and we're going, and we're going. And I feel the wind blowing through my hair. Yes, folks, I had hair then.

• 50:09Speaker 06

  And I feel the dust blowing up off the track hitting me in the face and being sticky. But I'm so excited because I'm moving what I think is about forty miles an hour. Not fifteen.

• 50:24Speaker 06

  So he says, "You're doing great. You're really doing great." He says, "You're holding the road in. You're doing the nice bend to the left." The track, of course, bends to the left. It's a counterclockwise track and it bends into the left. And I'm just following the contour of the track. So I said, "Where are the other cars?" He says, "Cars one, two, and three in front of you. They're about two hundred yards up and they're making the turn on the last lap." And I'm like, "Okay, let's get them." So I start stepping on the gas and I'm going, and I'm going. And he says, "Okay, you're good. They're on the right side, so stay right there, stay right there. Go a little bit left, a little bit left. Okay, now go, gun it, gun it, gun it." I fly past these cars. And he's like, "You're doing great." He says, "Hold on. Slow down."

• 51:10Speaker 06

  He goes, "You're going a hundred miles an hour." I said, "Nah!" I grabbed my head and he goes, "Will you please hold the wheel?" Oh shit, I grabbed the wheel. I'm like trying to be cool. I'm a nervous wreck. Everything's going crazy. My heart's going two hundred miles an hour. The car's only going a hundred.

• 51:29Speaker 06

  Finally, he says, "Okay, you're coming up to the checkered flag. You're coming up to the flag." He says, "Stop, stop. You won. You won. You won." I am friggin' thrilled to my core. I jam on the brakes. I get out of the car. I stand there, listening to the crowd roaring.

• 51:52Speaker 06

  And then I hear, out of the blue, a car drive right by me. And I said, "Jake, what was that?" And he said, "Get back in the car. That was the winner. I didn't think you were gonna stop so short, and you stopped fifty feet short of the flag."

• 52:15Speaker 06

  I complied. I put it in drive. I went forward the 50 feet, not a foot further. Pulled the car over, shut the engine, put my head on the steering wheel. And I was so bummed that I lost this race. I shouldn't have lost it. But only a second or two went by, and I realized that was so fun. That was so unbelievable. That was so sick. That was so dangerous. That was so stupid of these guys from PICS 106. But...

• 52:57Speaker 06

  But I felt the same way right now as I felt that day because today is 20 years ago to the day of that race.

• 53:16Speaker 06

  And I actually was amazed because I actually realized I had a dream come true. I got to drive a race car. Woohoo!

• 53:34Speaker 01

  That was Michael Corso. Sadly, Michael passed away a few months after telling this story. Michael excelled in many activities thought to be just for the sighted: bowling, skiing, tandem bike riding, and as you heard, race car driving. Wherever he went, he was always building community. Michael told this story close to his hometown of Albany. After the show, he was full of joy. He said, "Jody, sorry I went long, but I could tell they wanted more and I just had to give it."

• 54:09Speaker 01

  We do wish we had some more time with you, Michael. Thank you so much for sharing, inspiring, and moving us all to be a little more daring. To see a video of Michael on Race Day or to find out about his scholarship fund, please visit themoth.org.

• 54:26Speaker 01

  This is all for this episode. We want to thank all of our storytellers. We hope you'll join us next time.

• 54:42Speaker 04

  This episode of The Moth Radio Hour was produced by me, Jay Allison, Catherine Burns, and Jodi Powell, who also hosted the show. Co-producer, Vicky Merrick, associate producer, Emily Couch. The rest of The Moth's leadership team include Sarah Haberman, Sarah Austin Janess, Jennifer Hickson, Meg Bowles, Kate Tellers, Jennifer Birmingham, Marina Kluch, Leigh Anne Gully, Suzanne Rust, Brandon Grant, Inga Glodowsky, Sarah Jane Johnson, and Aldi Kaza. Our pitch came from Peter Holmdugglas of Dorval in Quebec, Canada. Moth stories are true, as remembered and affirmed by the storytellers. Our theme music is by The Drift. Other music in this hour is from Epidemic Sound.

• 55:26Speaker 04

  Podcast music, production support from Davy Sumner. We receive funding from the National Endowment for the Arts. The Moth Radio Hour is produced by Atlantic Public Media in Woods Hole, Massachusetts. Special thanks to our friends at Odyssey, including executive producer Leah Reese Dennis. For more about our podcast, for information on pitching us your own story, and everything else, go to our website, themoth.org.