#2236 - Protect Our Parks 13

Shane Gillis, Mark Normand, and Ari Shaffir are stand-up comics, writers, and podcasters. Shane is the co-host of "Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast" with Matt McCusker and one half of the sketch comedy duo "Gilly and Keeves" with John McKeever. Watch his new comedy series, "Tires," and special, "Beautiful Dogs" on Netflix. www.shanemgillis.com Mark is the co-host of the podcasts "Tuesdays with Stories" with Joe List and "We Might Be Drunk" with Sam Morril. Watch his latest stand-up special, "Soup to Nuts," on Netflix. www.marknormandcomedy.com Ari is the host of the "You Be Trippin'" podcast. His latest comedy special, "Ari Shaffir: Jew," is available now via YouTube. www.arishaffir.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  The Joe Rogan Experience.

• 0:12Joe Rogan?

  Boys, boys, we're up.

• 0:13Speaker 02

  Hey.

• 0:14Speaker 03

  Hey.

• 0:15Joe Rogan?

  Let's go.

• 0:15Speaker 02

  Party, headphones, you know how we do it.

• 0:17Speaker 03

  Black guys can be gay now.

• 0:18Joe Rogan?

  What happened?

• 0:19Speaker 02

  Black guys can be gay. It's allowed. They were never allowed to be gay, now they're allowed.

• 0:22Joe Rogan?

  Well, I think the Diddy thing let it all out of the closet. Like, hey, what kind of numbers are we talking about here?

• 0:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, I need something concrete.

• 0:29Speaker 02

  Wait, all right, I want to try. I want to try this. I want to try this. I want to try. He's got a new recipe.

• 0:32Speaker 03

  Hey, new recipe, new bottle on Bodega.

• 0:35Joe Rogan?

  What's the new recipe?

• 0:36Speaker 03

  Check it out, tastes just like Buffalo Trace.

• 0:38Joe Rogan?

  Well, I have Buffalo Trace right here.

• 0:40Speaker 02

  He just poured out Buffalo Trace into Bodega Cat.

• 0:43Joe Rogan?

  Let me try it next to each other.

• 0:43Speaker 03

  This is better for you.

• 0:44Joe Rogan?

  Oh, it's better for you?

• 0:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, Buffalo Trace is racist and tomophobic.

• 0:48Speaker 02

  It's got blood diamonds in it, too.

• 0:50Joe Rogan?

  Hold on, okay, Bodega Cat. It's pretty good.

• 0:53Speaker 03

  Hey.

• 0:54Joe Rogan?

  That's pretty good, that's different.

• 0:55Speaker 03

  New batch.

• 0:55Speaker 02

  Endorsement.

• 0:56Joe Rogan?

  It's different.

• 0:57Speaker 02

  It's different, you can tell it's different?

• 0:58Joe Rogan?

  It's better than the old one, yeah, it's smoother.

• 0:59Speaker 02

  Is that an official endorsement?

• 1:00Joe Rogan?

  Okay, now, Buffalo Trace.

• 1:02Speaker 03

  Easy.

• 1:05Joe Rogan?

  Oh, they win.

• 1:08Speaker 02

  You gotta do blind taste tests.

• 1:09Speaker 03

  I'll take it.

• 1:10Joe Rogan?

  You can't fuck with... Pretty good, though.

• 1:12Speaker 03

  That's an upgrade from last time.

• 1:13Joe Rogan?

  I'm fucking around, kinda. Uh, this is good. This is, Buffalo Trace is really good, but that's way better than the first version.

• 1:19Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 1:19Joe Rogan?

  Bodega Cat's good. Like, if I got that at a bar, I'd be like, oh, this is nice.

• 1:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:23Speaker 03

  You know what's fun? We didn't even change it, I liked.

• 1:25Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 1:25Speaker 03

  Ah, you see? Marketing.

• 1:27Speaker 02

  Really? It's smooth.

• 1:28Speaker 03

  Lying work.

• 1:29Joe Rogan?

  How do you not change it?

• 1:30Speaker 03

  No, we changed it.

• 1:31Joe Rogan?

  I was like, that doesn't make any sense, because the first one was like, it kinda had like...

• 1:36Speaker 02

  No, it's...

• 1:36Speaker 03

  Marketing Norman.

• 1:37Joe Rogan?

  The first one kinda had like, a rushed taste to it. You know, like, if you're doing a gig in Cincinnati, and, you know, they're not really using well whiskey.

• 1:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:46Joe Rogan?

  You know what I mean? You order a drink at the bar, and you're like, what is this?

• 1:49Speaker 02

  It's a local, uh, low-level brewery.

• 1:52Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:52Speaker 03

  Distillery.

• 1:54Speaker 02

  Sorry.

• 1:54Speaker 03

  Thank you. Hey, I brought some stogies, huh, boys?

• 1:57Joe Rogan?

  I got some.

• 1:58Speaker 03

  Woo.

• 2:00Speaker 02

  I brought your guys some from fucking Cuba, and then they...

• 2:02Speaker 03

  Really?

• 2:03Speaker 02

  They stole them at the airport.

• 2:04Joe Rogan?

  You battled TSA, dude. TSA owns your ass.

• 2:08Speaker 02

  That's it, this is like...

• 2:08Joe Rogan?

  They fuck you up.

• 2:09Speaker 02

  God damn, they keep beating me. You got your lighter in front of you, you screamed at it. That was so great. I was in full bucket bitch mode, and Shane's like, whoa. Yeah, I didn't know you had this trauma with them.

• 2:19Joe Rogan?

  But, yeah, imagine being them, though. Imagine dealing with people's stinky feet and bullshit excuses and...

• 2:24Speaker 02

  And then some giant Jew comes in with a gun lighter.

• 2:28Speaker 02

  Trying to get on a plane and you're like, no. And he's like, what the fuck?

• 2:32Joe Rogan?

  He's got a dildo strapped to his dick.

• 2:34Speaker 02

  I was losing it. I was like, I hope your wife gets raped.

• 2:37Joe Rogan?

  Spaz.

• 2:37Speaker 02

  Fuck you.

• 2:38Joe Rogan?

  Dude, I couldn't believe it. I was with Ari once when Ari farted on a TSA person.

• 2:42Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 2:42Joe Rogan?

  I said, I just farted on you. No. Yes, he did. No, you could do nothing. He was, this is like young Ari, young Ari was even more crazy.

• 2:50Speaker 03

  Young Ari was great.

• 2:51Joe Rogan?

  Young Ari was even more crazy and young Ari was like, this is what you choose to do with your life? This is what you choose to do with your life? Violate people's freedom? This is what you choose to do with your life? He would never, he would never, ever let them, uh, put him through the cancer machine. He only would get touched. So he would like, no, no.

• 3:08Speaker 02

  I was getting swabbed down by, by an Asian guy goes, isn't this demeaning in your culture, what you're doing?

• 3:14Speaker 03

  Damn, young Ari was an anarchist.

• 3:16Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:17Joe Rogan?

  Oh, he was like uncomfortable. I was like, Jesus Christ, Ari, I don't want to go to jail.

• 3:20Speaker 03

  So young Ari, what was that, 40 years ago?

• 3:22Speaker 02

  Rodeo would constantly be calling 911 and waiting to get through.

• 3:27Speaker 03

  Don't say 911 at an airport.

• 3:28Joe Rogan?

  Cause I know Ari, Ari's like one of those dudes, he has a switch. And when he crosses over to the other side, you're gonna have to wrestle him out of that room. He's gonna kill somebody. You're spaz, dude.

• 3:37Speaker 02

  I spaz, I spaz.

• 3:39Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's just an extreme.

• 3:41Speaker 02

  I like it, I like to see it.

• 3:42Joe Rogan?

  It's an extreme conviction.

• 3:44Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 3:45Joe Rogan?

  He extremely believes in his convictions and when someone's doing something he thinks is immoral or unethical, he gets fucking furious.

• 3:53Speaker 02

  The best one for TSA, you remember that when they started going like, state your name? I'm like, what? Why is that a new one? And it was only some places. I was like, why? And one guy at LAX was like, I'm like, why? Why did I have to say my name? And he goes, because my boss wants to take more power than other people's. And I'm like, oh, okay. All right, Ari Shaffir. That's honest.

• 4:09Joe Rogan?

  Nice. That's all he wanted. State your name, state your name, fuck off.

• 4:14Speaker 03

  Say my name.

• 4:15Joe Rogan?

  I used, I remember the old days, dude, when I first started traveling, you could give your ticket to somebody.

• 4:20Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:21Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 4:22Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you could just give your ticket to another person. Like, hey, I got a ticket.

• 4:25Speaker 02

  Yeah, you would just have a ticket.

• 4:26Joe Rogan?

  I'm gonna stay here. Do you want to go?

• 4:28Speaker 02

  That's awesome.

• 4:28Joe Rogan?

  And you, boom, you can get on a plane.

• 4:30Speaker 02

  That's great for bitches.

• 4:31Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 4:31Speaker 02

  You're like, I'll find one of them.

• 4:36Speaker 02

  I'll lock this price in, I'll lock this price in and I'll find a bitch.

• 4:39Speaker 03

  And you used to have to go wait with your girlfriend at the gate, remember that?

• 4:42Speaker 02

  Oh, you had to, now you don't have to.

• 4:44Joe Rogan?

  And you could meet them at the gate.

• 4:46Speaker 02

  That is one good thing.

• 4:47Joe Rogan?

  That's one good thing. Cause the gates would be packed with people waiting to meet their friends. Now, all those mutts, they have to be down there at the baggage claim.

• 4:54Speaker 04

  People don't talk about the good that came out of 9/11.

• 4:56Speaker 03

  Exactly.

• 4:57Speaker 04

  I got recessed that day, that's another one.

• 5:00Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 5:01Speaker 04

  That was a big day.

• 5:01Speaker 02

  That whole area downtown has been rejuvenated.

• 5:04Speaker 03

  Do you remember where you were?

• 5:05Speaker 04

  Yeah, I was in 8th grade.

• 5:07Joe Rogan?

  Bro, that, that area killed Donna Summer.

• 5:09Speaker 03

  What?

• 5:10Joe Rogan?

  She got lung cancer from, like, some, I think it's lung cancer, some horrible lung disease from breathing in the toxic fumes from the burn pits.

• 5:17Speaker 03

  What?

• 5:18Speaker 02

  The government said there were no toxic fumes.

• 5:21Joe Rogan?

  A lot of firemen will disagree. A lot of those people that had to, like, clear out that area, they're all fucked up from chemical burns.

• 5:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 5:28Joe Rogan?

  That fire burned for, like, weeks down there.

• 5:31Speaker 03

  No Jews in the building.

• 5:32Speaker 02

  Not one.

• 5:33Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 5:34Joe Rogan?

  Not one Jew died?

• 5:35Speaker 03

  That's why TSA's up your ass there.

• 5:37Joe Rogan?

  A text message, like a chat group, that you guys are involved in?

• 5:40Speaker 02

  One Jew died. He thought he had time to go back in, close a deal.

• 5:46Speaker 02

  He closed a deal, though.

• 5:47Joe Rogan?

  He closed that deal.

• 5:48Speaker 02

  He closed that deal.

• 5:49Joe Rogan?

  Bro, 9/11 is, that's the motherload of conspiracy theories. You will lose your life if you start, like, going down the rabbit hole of, like, Tower 7.

• 5:59Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 5:59Speaker 02

  The best is Eddie Griffin with 9/11. Cause he is a conspiracy guy.

• 6:03Speaker 03

  He told us there was gold.

• 6:05Speaker 02

  There's gold. The trains never stop, motherfucker.

• 6:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he had a whole rant on stage.

• 6:10Speaker 02

  The trains went right underneath the building.

• 6:12Speaker 03

  And the trains ran 24/7.

• 6:14Joe Rogan?

  Like, what, the trains ran?

• 6:16Speaker 02

  Transporting gold out.

• 6:17Joe Rogan?

  You're gonna transport gold on the subway? That seems risky. Have you ever been on the subway, sir?

• 6:23Speaker 02

  I transported a fucking box of hu- human feces and I was worried I was gonna get mugged.

• 6:27Joe Rogan?

  Why'd you have that?

• 6:28Speaker 02

  For Big Jay's birthday.

• 6:30Joe Rogan?

  Oh, it's an important gift. From, in his culture, it's a blessing.

• 6:35Speaker 02

  I have shit in this Tupperware for you.

• 6:40Speaker 04

  One of the wise men.

• 6:41Speaker 02

  Mr. Guys.

• 6:42Speaker 03

  He shit at Skype.

• 6:43Joe Rogan?

  I missed you guys too.

• 6:44Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 6:45Joe Rogan?

  Missed you guys too. We have to save the world.

• 6:46Speaker 03

  It's been too long.

• 6:47Speaker 02

  Too long. Shane's been busy making a fucking way in the world.

• 6:50Joe Rogan?

  Shane and I were taking a piss and we're like, dude, it feels like we're about to jump out of a helicopter.

• 6:54Speaker 04

  This is like, before we do this thing, it's just like, let's go. Let's fucking go. He's in the car on the way here, just looking out the window like.

• 7:02Joe Rogan?

  I was so happy.

• 7:03Speaker 03

  I know. It's a beautiful day and we're gonna ruin it in the studio in the dark.

• 7:06Speaker 02

  It really is beautiful there.

• 7:07Joe Rogan?

  It's always beautiful here. That's fine.

• 7:09Speaker 04

  It's like, dude, we're day drinking with friends.

• 7:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 7:12Speaker 02

  Yeah. It would be nice though, if you, if you put like a Toronto like retractable roof in here, it gets some sun.

• 7:18Speaker 03

  Oh, that'd be cool.

• 7:19Joe Rogan?

  That'd be a problem. That's an engineering issue. It's a safety and security issue.

• 7:23Speaker 02

  Hearing a lot of camp.

• 7:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, people could fucking parachute into the podcast. Remember that guy parachuted into the Holyfield fight?

• 7:30Speaker 02

  Fan man, yes.

• 7:31Joe Rogan?

  Holyfield versus Riddick Bowe.

• 7:33Speaker 02

  Wow, that guy.

• 7:34Joe Rogan?

  The guy parachuted in and landed in the ring and fucked the whole fight up. Fucked the fight up because it delayed the fight by many minutes. And then the guys cooled off. They were, I think it was like late in the fight too. See, round seven. So here it is, round seven.

• 7:47Speaker 02

  He's saying it.

• 7:47Joe Rogan?

  In Mills Lane, the referee saying stop. And this guy just, he missed.

• 7:53Speaker 04

  He missed. Gets his ass beat immediately.

• 7:55Joe Rogan?

  They are beating the fuck out of this dude.

• 7:57Speaker 03

  He did not expect this.

• 7:58Joe Rogan?

  Wow, maybe he was there to save the world, you assholes.

• 8:01Speaker 02

  Was this pre 9/11?

• 8:03Joe Rogan?

  Yes, yes.

• 8:04Speaker 02

  So they didn't even think of terrorism?

• 8:05Joe Rogan?

  No, no, they were just fucking that dude up.

• 8:07Speaker 04

  Oh, the hang glider.

• 8:08Joe Rogan?

  This was the 90s, I believe. I believe it was the early 90s. This episode is presented by Searchlight Pictures Wild Horse 9. Shortly before Chile's 1973 coup, two CIA agents, played by John Malkovich and Sam Rockwell, find their mission on Easter Island spiraling into a web of conspiracies, unexpected alliances, and chaos. Wild Horse 9, only in theaters Friday. Get tickets now. This episode is brought to you by NOCO. You're miles from home, you turn the key, nothing. Dead battery. Normally that means finding another car, someone willing to give you a jump, and dealing with old jumper cables. But what?

• 8:49Joe Rogan?

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• 9:30Joe Rogan?

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• 10:14Joe Rogan?

  The answer to that is yes, obviously. So try The Farmer's Dog today and get 50% off your first box of fresh, healthy food. Plus, get free shipping. Just go to thefarmersdog.com/rogan. This offer is for new customers only. Damn.

• 10:34Speaker 02

  They're all in there touching them for no reason.

• 10:35Joe Rogan?

  Does it say what year that is, Jimmy?

• 10:36Speaker 04

  No, it didn't say.

• 10:37Joe Rogan?

  It's... It had to be the 90s, because I know I was living in New York. I think I was living in New York when this was happening.

• 10:44Speaker 02

  Landing and immediately getting beat up is so fucking funny.

• 10:47Joe Rogan?

  Did you see that white guy wearing the... Look at him swoop in.

• 10:50Speaker 02

  Did you see that white guy wearing the Howard University shirt?

• 10:52Joe Rogan?

  With the hat on?

• 10:53Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 10:53Joe Rogan?

  That was a bad hat.

• 10:54Speaker 02

  Yeah, Howard University.

• 10:55Joe Rogan?

  Look at the hat on that guy.

• 10:56Speaker 02

  He's so fucking white. Who the fuck is that white ass?

• 10:59Joe Rogan?

  Listen, man, JD Vance. He's gotta represent.

• 11:02Speaker 02

  He was undercover. He was FBI, Johnny.

• 11:04Speaker 04

  Infiltrate.

• 11:05Speaker 02

  He's like, "I'm cool."

• 11:08Joe Rogan?

  Back then, you could wear blackface.

• 11:10Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 11:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 11:11Joe Rogan?

  I mean, it wasn't that long enough.

• 11:13Speaker 02

  It was just called costume.

• 11:14Joe Rogan?

  That, you know, Tropic Thunder was what? What year was that?

• 11:17Speaker 03

  Two thousand eight?

• 11:18Speaker 02

  You can still do it if you control your invite list.

• 11:20Speaker 03

  You see Jay Leno, he's in full blackface. What happened to him?

• 11:23Speaker 02

  Ooh.

• 11:23Speaker 03

  Fell down a hill.

• 11:24Speaker 04

  Getting hammered, fall down hills.

• 11:26Speaker 03

  I know.

• 11:26Joe Rogan?

  Apparently, he owed a hill some money.

• 11:29Speaker 02

  What was that?

• 11:30Joe Rogan?

  He fell.

• 11:31Speaker 03

  That was a Chris Brown.

• 11:32Speaker 02

  I'm falling.

• 11:33Speaker 04

  He's at a hotel, he saw a fucking TGI Fridays at the bottom.

• 11:36Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 11:37Speaker 04

  Of a hill, he said, "I'm gonna get a briefski."

• 11:41Joe Rogan?

  Well, you gotta realize, that guy was in a motorcycle accident, like, a year and a half or so ago, fucked his knees up. So he's probably very unsteady on his legs. And then before that, he was severely burned. He was severely, yeah, severely burned, like, three years ago.

• 11:57Speaker 02

  They want him, they want him.

• 11:59Joe Rogan?

  But a motorcycle, he's a, have you met him?

• 12:01Speaker 02

  No.

• 12:02Joe Rogan?

  He's not a robust man. Like, he's a guy that if he fell off of a motorcycle, he's getting fucked up.

• 12:07Speaker 02

  Oh, right.

• 12:08Joe Rogan?

  And he got fucked up. So, to me, like, him falling and hitting his face on the ground.

• 12:12Speaker 03

  Jesus!

• 12:13Speaker 02

  He's got that smile though.

• 12:14Joe Rogan?

  Listen, that could happen to any one of us, but if you're this guy, you probably can't stop yourself from falling flat on your face.

• 12:21Speaker 02

  That other picture. He doesn't give a, he's talking shit to death, dude.

• 12:25Speaker 03

  Yeah, he's tough.

• 12:27Speaker 02

  He gets pictures, he goes, "Yeah, you motherfucker."

• 12:28Joe Rogan?

  Well, this guy rides a fucking motorcycle all the time.

• 12:31Speaker 03

  He's sober.

• 12:32Joe Rogan?

  He rides a motorcycle all the time.

• 12:34Speaker 02

  Looks like a foreman at a mine.

• 12:35Speaker 03

  He's got an eye patch.

• 12:36Joe Rogan?

  That's when he got severely burned.

• 12:38Speaker 03

  What did the hill do?

• 12:39Speaker 02

  He really does look like a Bond villain.

• 12:40Joe Rogan?

  So, when you're that, the eye patch.

• 12:42Speaker 03

  Oh, syphilis.

• 12:44Speaker 02

  Too far.

• 12:45Joe Rogan?

  That's the burn. If you get that, so that was two years ago, I guess? So if you get that fucked up by a fire, and then you fall on a motorcycle and you break your knees, like, what was his motorcycle injuries? Find out what his motorcycle injuries?

• 12:56Speaker 03

  Man, that was Bernie Sanders.

• 12:59Joe Rogan?

  He just doesn't look like the same guy. He looks, he looks pretty frail now.

• 13:05Speaker 03

  He never complains though.

• 13:07Joe Rogan?

  Seventy-two, broke his collarbone, getting clothesline on his vintage motorcycle. Clothesline by wire, strung across a parking lot.

• 13:15Speaker 02

  What, he's driving through a Hasidic Jewish neighborhood?

• 13:18Speaker 04

  He's getting like Wile E. Coyote injuries.

• 13:21Joe Rogan?

  And that's two months after the burns. So he was recovering from the burns where a fucking engine blew up in his face.

• 13:28Speaker 03

  What the fuck?

• 13:29Speaker 02

  Seventy-two, I'll be seventy-two in four years.

• 13:31Joe Rogan?

  The fucking guy, he keeps-

• 13:33Speaker 04

  Preemptive strike.

• 13:34Joe Rogan?

  Turning wrenches.

• 13:37Joe Rogan?

  He's still out there turning wrenches. He's fucking seventy years old, working on these cars.

• 13:42Speaker 03

  He's tough. Everybody's complaining, everybody's a victim, not Jay Leno.

• 13:45Speaker 04

  That's honestly what he did to protect our parks.

• 13:47Speaker 02

  Oh, you can see a tire in his face.

• 13:49Joe Rogan?

  That actually looks like a skin graft.

• 13:51Speaker 04

  Oh, man.

• 13:52Speaker 03

  Yikes.

• 13:53Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that's what that looks like.

• 13:54Speaker 04

  Dude, I'm, Leno kinda rules for this.

• 13:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, he does.

• 13:57Joe Rogan?

  Look, the guy's out there.

• 13:58Speaker 04

  I don't wanna make a pun.

• 13:59Speaker 02

  Let him take over the Daily Show.

• 14:00Speaker 04

  He's got a hell of a chin.

• 14:00Joe Rogan?

  I don't have the balls to ride a motorcycle.

• 14:02Speaker 04

  He's got a hell of a chin, dude.

• 14:03Speaker 03

  You got that right. Damn, tough guy. Clean comics. They're psychos.

• 14:08Joe Rogan?

  He was really good back in the day. Really good in the seventies.

• 14:12Speaker 02

  When I started, people were saying, obviously with ever was like prior number one, and then like who's number two is the only, and then they go, a lot of people said Leno.

• 14:19Joe Rogan?

  Leno was an edgy motherfucker when he was young, but he wanted that job, man. We gotta realize what that carrot was to guys from that era. If you have a chance to host The Tonight Show, that is the end-all be-all. Fuck selling out Madison Square Garden, doing stand-up, fucking HBO special. The Tonight Show was the spot. You were the kingmaker.

• 14:39Speaker 02

  You take over Carson, that you are on the level of Frank Sinatra. You guys would be friends now.

• 14:44Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 14:44Speaker 03

  And there were like four jobs back then for comics.

• 14:46Joe Rogan?

  Exactly.

• 14:47Speaker 02

  You can make other comics.

• 14:48Joe Rogan?

  But that was the job. If you were a guy coming up in the seventies and then in the eighties, that job was the fucking ultimate top position.

• 14:58Speaker 03

  Well, this is The Tonight Show now, wouldn't you say?

• 15:00Joe Rogan?

  That's ridiculous, but I think it is.

• 15:03Speaker 03

  I mean, it's not clean and you don't have to wear a suit, but no one's watching The Tonight Show.

• 15:07Joe Rogan?

  Luckily, I didn't want this, right?

• 15:09Speaker 02

  This isn't tonight's show now. Oh, I get it. I get it. Yeah.

• 15:12Joe Rogan?

  The difference is like, I'm not changing who I am to get this because I needed this.

• 15:16Speaker 02

  Also, no.

• 15:17Joe Rogan?

  But I think that's what Jay Leno did.

• 15:18Speaker 03

  Of course.

• 15:19Joe Rogan?

  I think he was an edgy, like, he was a, like, leather jacket, fucking talking shit about people. Yeah, man. He was good, dude.

• 15:26Speaker 03

  You ever see him on Letterman when he eating a hoagie? He's just sitting there eating a hoagie, fucking with Letterman.

• 15:30Joe Rogan?

  He was good, dude.

• 15:31Speaker 02

  Also, when he took over, he had a day where he's like, you fucking host today? He booked Michael Richards. He goes, I want you on. He was booking like weird, edgy people for his version of that show.

• 15:39Speaker 03

  N word.

• 15:41Joe Rogan?

  He's, um, he was a real comic, but I think that job just like demands compliance. You have to fi- fit into that position. And then, you know, remember that Bill Hicks bit about?

• 15:52Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 15:53Joe Rogan?

  Him interviewing Joey Lawrence?

• 15:54Speaker 03

  So, Joey, you got a girlfriend?

• 15:56Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, no. She thinks so. Huh huh huh. And then he did. And then Jay Leno reaches in and grabs an Uzi and sprays his brains out. I used to be a good comic. He unloads the clip and reloads it and his brains spray out into a NBC peacock. Because he's a company man to the bitter end. Whoa, dude.

• 16:16Speaker 02

  That's funny.

• 16:17Joe Rogan?

  Hicks, I asked Jay Leno about that bit once.

• 16:19Speaker 02

  What is?

• 16:20Joe Rogan?

  He had a weird response. He was like, yeah, you know, he didn't want to do jokes for everybody.

• 16:25Speaker 02

  I forget, he talks like he's from the twenties too.

• 16:27Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:28Speaker 02

  He's getting Three Stooges injuries and be like, oh. Hey, Norman, you and Leno should have a cabrio.

• 16:34Joe Rogan?

  He was a fun guy on the podcast. Cause he was telling these crazy stories about old school shows that he did. Like this mafia guy yelling at a priest. And Jay Leno was screaming and swearing. It was wild.

• 16:45Speaker 03

  Wow. You know his old move? Before there were a bunch of clubs around in the late sixties, he would go to a strip club, put fifty bucks on the bar and go, if I bomb, keep it. And if I do well, just give me the fifty back.

• 16:58Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 16:58Speaker 03

  True story. Leno.

• 17:01Joe Rogan?

  Wow, so he would not even be working for free.

• 17:03Speaker 02

  Leno rules.

• 17:04Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 17:05Speaker 03

  Leno's great.

• 17:05Joe Rogan?

  He just became a different guy to get that show. That's really what it is.

• 17:10Speaker 02

  Happens a lot in LA.

• 17:11Joe Rogan?

  Wow, that's the sitcom thing, man. You see it a lot with guys that are really good comics coming up, and then they get on a show and they start being careful. They start pulling back. You have a Netflix show, it's different. That's a different animal.

• 17:22Speaker 02

  Yeah, but also, he went in Dice style, where he's like, "I'm gonna be me." And they're like, "We're signing you for you." So he can keep being him.

• 17:30Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's possible to keep being you, but it's very difficult. Most people, they get trapped by the fucking siren song, and the, you know, the banshees lead them into the rocks.

• 17:41Speaker 04

  Thankfully, stand-up is the most incentive, that's the most incentive that you could possibly have.

• 17:47Joe Rogan?

  It should be, but people that are really captivated by the idea of having a show, for them, it's like the ultimate, "I made it, I have my own show."

• 17:56Speaker 04

  Stand-up's so much easier.

• 17:57Joe Rogan?

  So much better.

• 17:58Speaker 04

  So much better.

• 17:59Joe Rogan?

  I remember when I found out how much money people would make doing stand-up, like if they sold out a whole weekend at the Irvine Improv. And I was like, "That's what I get at a comedy club." What they get at a comedy club is what I get on sitcoms.

• 18:09Speaker 04

  A season.

• 18:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, no, no, an episode.

• 18:12Speaker 04

  Close.

• 18:12Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 18:13Speaker 02

  Shane, Shane, Shane, it's a different time. What you're doing is a different thing.

• 18:17Joe Rogan?

  For sure.

• 18:19Speaker 02

  A long time ago, no one was doing the Wells Fargo. We couldn't even get free tickets to the Wells Fargo, bro, relax.

• 18:25Joe Rogan?

  But you remember when you first start selling out comedy clubs, you're like, "Oh my god, this is like sitcom money."

• 18:30Speaker 03

  Adding shows?

• 18:31Speaker 02

  It's teacher money.

• 18:32Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 18:32Speaker 02

  Teacher for the year money.

• 18:33Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, for a whole year. Yeah, what a teacher gets in a whole year, you get in a weekend being drunk.

• 18:38Speaker 02

  Big drunk.

• 18:39Speaker 04

  That might be a problem.

• 18:41Joe Rogan?

  It's not though, because it's hard to get there. They could do it too. You don't like teaching? Put together an act.

• 18:48Speaker 02

  It just takes 14 years and build up.

• 18:50Joe Rogan?

  That's the thing, like, the reality of comedy is it really takes 10 years to be any good. It's like a 10-year process.

• 18:56Speaker 02

  It's funny to see the friends from, like, high school go from like, "Oh, that's cool," but also like, I feel sorry for them, we're all trying to get big in the business, and always like, barely able to afford McDonald's. And then like, as you start, "Oh, he's doing okay." And then like, either like, "Hell yeah," or jealousy, like, "Why you get this?"

• 19:11Joe Rogan?

  Oh yeah, there's a lot of that.

• 19:13Speaker 02

  Poor for two decades.

• 19:13Joe Rogan?

  Well, you know where the real jealousy comes? From people that don't have any growth in their profession, where it's not possible. Like this is the the height of you can maintain this and you you budget your lifestyle and you'll be fine. But there's no dream. There's no chase. There's no thing. So when they see a guy like you chasing stuff, putting together specials, getting more popular. Oh, my God, he sold that what? Oh, that's crazy. That that's sort of like fucks with people because they realize like they didn't make a choice that's exciting.

• 19:40Speaker 03

  You gotta grow. You hear that, Jamie?

• 19:43Speaker 04

  Jamie grew mustache.

• 19:44Speaker 02

  Jamie's looking Mexican as fuck now.

• 19:46Speaker 04

  Yeah, you look good.

• 19:47Speaker 02

  Jaime Vernon is uh.

• 19:48Speaker 03

  Ay caramba.

• 19:50Joe Rogan?

  I thought it was, I thought he looked more Persian.

• 19:52Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 19:53Speaker 02

  You can pass as anything, brother.

• 19:54Speaker 03

  Like a rug.

• 19:57Speaker 02

  Oh, cause he's got that long hair, too.

• 19:58Speaker 04

  You look good, dude.

• 19:59Speaker 03

  Ah, let's not go crazy there.

• 20:02Speaker 04

  Ponytail mustache?

• 20:03Joe Rogan?

  What does that hat say?

• 20:05Speaker 04

  Uh, I don't know. It was in my house.

• 20:06Speaker 03

  Wega house.

• 20:07Speaker 04

  Wega house.

• 20:08Joe Rogan?

  What is that?

• 20:09Speaker 04

  I don't know. They sent it to me. I think it's Aaron Rodgers.

• 20:12Joe Rogan?

  Oh, okay.

• 20:14Speaker 02

  Camo.

• 20:14Speaker 04

  JMo, pull that up. Is that Aaron Rodgers? Actually, don't pull it up. Just I think it's Aaron Rodgers.

• 20:18Speaker 03

  Speaking of Jets, nine eleven, we brought it all back.

• 20:21Speaker 04

  That's the weave.

• 20:21Joe Rogan?

  That's the weave.

• 20:22Speaker 03

  Run it back to the weave. I was like my black ex.

• 20:25Joe Rogan?

  Oh, you're sitting in the Trump seat. How's it feel?

• 20:27Speaker 02

  God, the Jets feels powerful, bro.

• 20:29Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 20:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, give me some Cheetos.

• 20:31Speaker 03

  He's got a big fat ass.

• 20:32Speaker 04

  He does have a thickie.

• 20:33Joe Rogan?

  Makes you wanna die a coke.

• 20:34Speaker 03

  Big rump and that means Donald's apron.

• 20:36Speaker 02

  Oh, I gotta have a dick off of Trump.

• 20:38Joe Rogan?

  Is he RFK Junior saying that he was like complaining about what he eats? He's like, you get on the plane with him and it's the garbage, it's poison. It's all either KFC or McDonald's.

• 20:48Speaker 02

  Shut up.

• 20:49Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he's like, you have KFC or McDonald's. Those are your two options.

• 20:53Speaker 02

  RFK talks about Trump the way I talk about DeRosa. It's like, stop with the shots already. Having a good time, come on.

• 20:59Joe Rogan?

  It's my birthday week. Do a shot.

• 21:01Speaker 02

  One shot.

• 21:02Joe Rogan?

  Also, they're talking about RFK for the HHS role, like uh Health and Human Services. Well, you're on a plane with a guy eating poison and he's running the whole world.

• 21:12Speaker 02

  Oh, they gotta, wait, Susan, yeah, you need Susan Powder to run that.

• 21:15Joe Rogan?

  It's like, maybe I should eat poison. He's doing great.

• 21:18Speaker 03

  I had Fruit Loops today. I just feel RFK mad at me when he eats cereal.

• 21:21Joe Rogan?

  You gotta buy them from Canada.

• 21:23Speaker 03

  I'm on Fruit Loops.

• 21:24Joe Rogan?

  Use a VPN and get on a Canadian Amazon and have them shipped across the seas.

• 21:28Speaker 02

  Have you heard RFK? Talking about his son taking mushrooms?

• 21:31Speaker 03

  What? Pull it up!

• 21:32Speaker 02

  Oh, it's wild. He was like, I thought these were all drugs, and then I saw him get better.

• 21:36Speaker 03

  He's the voice of a generation.

• 21:37Joe Rogan?

  His son, the one who served?

• 21:39Speaker 02

  I don't know, he goes, he would fight all the time, he'd get into arguments in hockey, and then like, took these drugs, and he's like, he's a cooler person, and

• 21:45Speaker 03

  Whoa!

• 21:46Speaker 02

  I had to look into it.

• 21:47Joe Rogan?

  One of his sons went and fought

• 21:48Speaker 04

  Fought Ukraine?

• 21:49Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 21:49Speaker 03

  Whoa!

• 21:50Speaker 04

  He's like a machine gunner in Ukraine?

• 21:51Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 21:52Speaker 03

  I didn't know that.

• 21:53Joe Rogan?

  You get to go do it. They'll let you go over there.

• 21:55Speaker 03

  Nah, they don't want me.

• 21:56Joe Rogan?

  One hundred percent.

• 21:57Speaker 03

  Half gay.

• 21:58Joe Rogan?

  Just get half fit, do five chin ups.

• 22:00Speaker 02

  You can watch it. I've been watching. You can watch the war.

• 22:02Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah?

• 22:03Speaker 02

  It's crazy. Now, you don't want to watch it. It's weird. It's like trench warfare. It's like five on five. Let's see it. It's weird.

• 22:08Speaker 03

  Whoa!

• 22:09Speaker 02

  Like Iowa basketball?

• 22:10Speaker 03

  Would you go?

• 22:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. You're watching it the same way people watch those little fucking, what are those little cameras called? What are those things called?

• 22:15Speaker 03

  GoPro.

• 22:15Speaker 02

  GoPros, yeah.

• 22:16Joe Rogan?

  It's like a GoPro footage of a guy doing a BMX trail.

• 22:19Speaker 02

  Shaky? Yeah, it looks like that.

• 22:20Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's like a guy's running down the trail, shooting people in a pit.

• 22:24Speaker 03

  What?

• 22:24Joe Rogan?

  You don't want to see it.

• 22:25Speaker 02

  And the drones are shitty. You're right. They're like little shitty drones you see at like a park.

• 22:30Joe Rogan?

  They're suicide drones.

• 22:31Speaker 02

  Yeah, and you just hear them, and it's

• 22:32Joe Rogan?

  They shoot down, they just land on you and blow you up.

• 22:37Speaker 03

  Damn, man, we got it good.

• 22:38Joe Rogan?

  There's a video of a guy throwing his AK at the drone, and the drone explodes in the air, and

• 22:43Speaker 03

  What?

• 22:44Joe Rogan?

  Saves him.

• 22:44Speaker 02

  And he saves him.

• 22:45Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, saves him.

• 22:46Speaker 03

  Wow!

• 22:47Joe Rogan?

  But for now.

• 22:48Speaker 02

  Different kind of warfare. If we're talking about it, what are we doing over there?

• 22:51Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 22:51Speaker 03

  Yeah, pull out!

• 22:52Speaker 02

  Cut it out.

• 22:53Joe Rogan?

  What is Biden doing, allowing Ukraine to launch long-range missiles into Russia?

• 22:58Speaker 03

  Trying to go out with a bang.

• 22:59Speaker 02

  I love when these presidents do something last minute that they know is gonna get reversed. They're just like, here, I'll throw this in. I know, but he's like, it's like, I'm done. I'll just wait till the next guy comes in and has to change it.

• 23:10Speaker 03

  He's messing, he's trying to make it messy for Trump.

• 23:12Joe Rogan?

  It's very, well, it's not just messy, it might be a war.

• 23:15Speaker 02

  Might be the end of the world.

• 23:16Joe Rogan?

  It could be the end of the world, could be a hot war where they could suspend this changing of the guard, too. Who knows what the fuck could happen?

• 23:24Speaker 02

  Aren't they just trying to occupy Russia? Just keep them occupied?

• 23:27Joe Rogan?

  Here's the thing, dude.

• 23:27Speaker 02

  Is that the deal?

• 23:28Joe Rogan?

  If you've got shit, if you've got a guy that's coming in that wants to find all the corruption, and find what happened during 2020, and find out who colluded, and check emails, and check, there's a lot of incentive to do some wild shit to keep him from taking that position. I know that's super tinfoil, Hattie.

• 23:47Speaker 02

  I mean, it's not Hunter.

• 23:48Joe Rogan?

  Why else?

• 23:49Speaker 02

  Why was Hunter at Burisma?

• 23:50Speaker 03

  Yeah!

• 23:51Joe Rogan?

  Right, right.

• 23:52Speaker 03

  Good question.

• 23:53Joe Rogan?

  And why is it?

• 23:54Speaker 02

  What does that mean? What are those terms?

• 23:57Joe Rogan?

  Biden's son was working for Burisma, which is a huge company in Ukraine. He was making millions of dollars for a job he's completely unqualified for.

• 24:05Speaker 02

  He was on the board in an energy company in Ukraine while he was, I think it was like while he was on crack. Why did that?

• 24:10Joe Rogan?

  Around there. Well, how about that crazy speech where Biden is on stage with a couple of guys and he's talking about how he fired the prosecutor? He got the prosecutor fired, or they wouldn't have got the money? See if you can find that, because this is, it's so crazy. This guy's ego is so nuts that he said this publicly just to flex. He's basically just explaining the power that he had as vice president while his son was working for Burisma. And he's just expressing it publicly.

• 24:39Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 24:40Joe Rogan?

  And it should be a crime. It's like, what your son sounds like, doesn't sound like what I want from the president. It sounds crazy.

• 24:46Speaker 02

  Damn.

• 24:46Speaker 03

  But for a crackhead, he got a lot done.

• 24:49Speaker 02

  He was going wild.

• 24:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 24:50Joe Rogan?

  He was going wild. That boy was going wild.

• 24:51Speaker 03

  Lot of hookers.

• 24:52Speaker 02

  I actually, I'm coming around on Biden.

• 24:54Joe Rogan?

  A Biden?

• 24:54Speaker 03

  Biden's nice.

• 24:55Speaker 02

  Well, Hunter rule.

• 24:57Speaker 04

  Joe is funny. Now Joe's at the end and he's kind of, other than the whole escalation.

• 25:02Joe Rogan?

  First of all, if you think it's Joe's idea to launch those missiles, there's no fucking way. Joe, Joe has nothing to do with that. Joe had a giant smile on his face when he was sitting there with Trump, giant smile.

• 25:11Speaker 02

  Did you see Gaffigan's joke about, about?

• 25:13Speaker 04

  That is apparently, yeah.

• 25:14Speaker 02

  Gaffigan's joke about, uh, it goes, um, there's only a couple of Democrats that don't, that don't like, um, Kamala and it's Joe Biden's family.

• 25:22Joe Rogan?

  Ah. So like, play this so we could hear it.

• 25:27Joe Rogan?

  Start from the beginning.

• 25:33Speaker 05

  A billion dollars. Nah, I said, I'm not gonna, we're not gonna give you the billion dollars. They said, you have no authority, you're not the president. The president said, I said, call him.

• 25:45Speaker 05

  I said, I'm telling you, you're not getting a billion dollars. I said, you're not getting a billion, I'm gonna be leaving here. And I think it was what, six hours? I looked, I said, I'm leaving in six hours. If the prosecutor's not fired, you're not getting the money. Well, son of a bitch. Got fired. And they put in place someone who was solid at the time.

• 26:05Joe Rogan?

  So, this is in reference?

• 26:07Speaker 02

  What prosecutor?

• 26:08Joe Rogan?

  Oh, he was very, very sharp when he was younger. He was still full of shit, but he was sharp.

• 26:12Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 26:12Joe Rogan?

  What was that in reference to? See if you can find.

• 26:16Speaker 02

  Apparently, well, they said it was a corrupt prosecutor.

• 26:19Joe Rogan?

  Well, that's the thing about Ukraine.

• 26:21Speaker 02

  They keep trying to get their own guys, whatever.

• 26:22Joe Rogan?

  Ukraine, Ukraine's corrupt as fuck.

• 26:24Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 26:24Joe Rogan?

  Always has been.

• 26:25Speaker 03

  Yeah, Zelensky, he owes us a lot of money.

• 26:29Joe Rogan?

  He owes me money. That's not a big deal.

• 26:30Speaker 03

  Yes, billions.

• 26:32Speaker 02

  Tucker told me they had a deal, a ceasefire in place, and the UK and the US were like, nope, no ceasefire, keep it going.

• 26:38Joe Rogan?

  Oh, Jesus Christ.

• 26:41Speaker 03

  Oh, boy, what about Gaza? Ukraine.

• 26:43Speaker 02

  Ukraine.

• 26:44Joe Rogan?

  Jesus, son of a bitch.

• 26:46Speaker 02

  I like that, Ukraine.

• 26:47Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you guys, come on, man.

• 26:48Speaker 02

  That's a mess, yeah, Hamas, Hamas, Hamas, just give back those people and just everybody chill out.

• 26:52Joe Rogan?

  I bet those people are all dead, dude.

• 26:54Speaker 02

  No, they just got a couple more back.

• 26:56Speaker 03

  Oh, really?

• 26:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, the women, they're trying to impregnate all the time, so.

• 26:58Joe Rogan?

  Oh, Jesus.

• 27:00Speaker 02

  Well, still, you got, you know, can't blow up much kids, though. Yeah, just give that shit back.

• 27:05Joe Rogan?

  I know, but also, you know.

• 27:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, I know, everybody's shitty there.

• 27:07Joe Rogan?

  How many hostages, here, a buyer, allies. Pushed out Ukrainian prosecutor because he didn't pursue corruption cases. So whistleblower complaint centering on President Donald Trump's phone call with Ukrainian president has spurred a number of allegations and counter allegations as Republicans, Democrats jockey for position amid an impeachment inquiry at the heart of Congress probe into the president's actions is his claim that former Vice President and 2020 Democratic frontrunner Joe Biden strong-armed the Ukrainian government to fire its top prosecutor in order to thwart an investigation into a company tied to his son Hunter Biden. But sources ranging from former Obama administration officials to anti-corruption advocate in Ukraine

• 27:49Joe Rogan?

  say the official Viktor Shokin was ousted for the opposite reason Trump and his allies claim. Of course, they say that. It was, wasn't because Shokin was investigating a natural gas company tied to Biden's son, it was because Shokin wasn't pursuing corruption amongst the country's politicians, according to a Ukrainian official and four former American officials who specialize in Ukraine and Europe. That sounds like a convenient narrative. I don't know what's true, but that sounds a little convenient.

• 28:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 28:19Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no, no, he was fired because he wasn't investigating corruption. We, we insist that they investigate corruption in other countries. And if they don't, we won't give you the money. In fact, we are so ethical that if we don't look at your papers and find zero corruption, you don't get the billion dollars. Well, son of a bitch. They fired him. Well, shut the fuck up. What am I, a child? You think I'm a child?

• 28:42Speaker 04

  It works.

• 28:42Speaker 03

  Trump's gonna pardon him.

• 28:44Speaker 02

  They're all doing it. It's just government.

• 28:46Joe Rogan?

  Hunter. Is he?

• 28:47Speaker 03

  Yeah, he said that.

• 28:48Speaker 02

  It's just government. They're all fucking bullshits.

• 28:50Joe Rogan?

  Let Hunter out, dude.

• 28:51Speaker 04

  Pardon my man Hunter.

• 28:52Joe Rogan?

  Imagine that guy being your dad, you'd do crack too. You'd be out there, get wild, getting foot jobs, filming it, leaving it on a laptop. These guys lost. Yeah. Also, when you're making millions of dollars for a job you really shouldn't have, you go wild.

• 29:07Speaker 03

  Of course.

• 29:07Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 29:08Joe Rogan?

  Especially if you're already a cokehead.

• 29:10Speaker 02

  Yeah, Kim Kardashian.

• 29:12Joe Rogan?

  You go wild. You go fucking wild.

• 29:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, stand-up comedy. It's like, let me drink. I'm making so much money, let me drink before work.

• 29:18Speaker 03

  Yeah. Tony Inskliff has four thrones.

• 29:23Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 29:24Speaker 04

  He has a lot of thrones.

• 29:25Speaker 03

  He's a green corp.

• 29:26Speaker 02

  There's more, way more thrones than anyone should have.

• 29:28Joe Rogan?

  He gets thrones made. I'm thinking of getting a new throne.

• 29:32Speaker 04

  It's tough, dude. Don't get me started on that fucking shit.

• 29:35Joe Rogan?

  Bro, we need thrones. We should get four thrones that we only use and protect our parks.

• 29:39Speaker 02

  That we reel in for this?

• 29:40Joe Rogan?

  Oh. How about that?

• 29:41Speaker 03

  That's fun.

• 29:42Joe Rogan?

  How about that? What should they look like?

• 29:43Speaker 02

  Like a mid-somar thing.

• 29:45Speaker 03

  Put a toilet in it.

• 29:46Speaker 02

  Oh, that's not bad. Yes.

• 29:48Joe Rogan?

  Imagine we're sitting here smelling. Are we shitting it? It'd be just like a bus. Don't shit on the bus.

• 29:53Speaker 04

  People, we don't be shitting the whole time, dude.

• 29:55Speaker 03

  You got that right.

• 29:56Speaker 04

  Just looking at each other's in the eyes.

• 30:00Speaker 02

  Can't talk, beat him.

• 30:01Joe Rogan?

  That'd be terrible.

• 30:02Speaker 03

  You already shit in a box. What are you talking about? You shit on stage a skank fest.

• 30:07Speaker 02

  No pissing to that.

• 30:07Joe Rogan?

  Dude, I went into a public bathroom yesterday at a football game, and this guy shit so bad that as I walked in, I could barely hang on. I was like, oh no, it was a big bathroom, like six, seven stalls.

• 30:18Speaker 02

  Wait, you went to the UT game?

• 30:19Joe Rogan?

  No, no, it was a high school game.

• 30:20Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 30:21Speaker 03

  What?

• 30:22Joe Rogan?

  What?

• 30:22Speaker 03

  You're not allowed there.

• 30:23Joe Rogan?

  It's fun. Alright.

• 30:24Speaker 02

  High school football is fun.

• 30:26Joe Rogan?

  It was fun. So anyway, I go, it was fun.

• 30:29Speaker 02

  Drink a hot cocoa for two dollars, watch some shitty snapper get replaced halfway through.

• 30:32Joe Rogan?

  And they play good. They play good. I'm getting into football.

• 30:35Speaker 02

  I used to be Fairfax Eye.

• 30:36Joe Rogan?

  Football fucking rules, dude.

• 30:37Speaker 04

  See people get like swapped out like.

• 30:39Joe Rogan?

  I'm enjoying Notre Dame football. I'm enjoying football.

• 30:41Speaker 04

  You'd be such a good Notre Dame fan.

• 30:42Joe Rogan?

  I'm enjoying it. But the point is like this guy's shit.

• 30:45Speaker 04

  We need the NIL. We need your NIL. Hold on a second Joe, let's talk business.

• 30:48Joe Rogan?

  Public bathroom, the moment I walk in, I was like, oh, I was like, I can hold it. I was like, no, I can hold it. Like his shit was so bad that in a big bathroom, it just overpowered the whole bathroom. Just one dude.

• 31:01Speaker 04

  Football bathrooms are up there with like JFK airport dumps.

• 31:04Joe Rogan?

  Airport dumps.

• 31:05Speaker 04

  Airport dumps are bad. Some guy from fucking Senegal lands.

• 31:09Speaker 03

  Camel shit, national shit.

• 31:11Joe Rogan?

  Just a bad camel he ate before he took off.

• 31:13Speaker 04

  I had a, hold on, you liked it. I had a JFK, I had an all time, like me and O'Connor were at JFK. We landed and got drunk. We got drunk at the Buffalo Wild Wings.

• 31:23Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 31:24Speaker 04

  It was, it was on a Sunday, so we were watching football and we got hammered, but we started fighting. We always fight about shit. He's a liberal dude. He loves Blueski. We were getting fucked up, arguing about that. And then in the middle of the argument, I went to go.

• 31:35Joe Rogan?

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• 32:17Joe Rogan?

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• 33:01Joe Rogan?

  Because you can try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/rogan. And because ZipRecruiter helps sort through thousands of resumes and applications. Showing you the most qualified and interesting ones first. There's even an option for candidates to explain why they want the job. Let ZipRecruiter find the right people for your roles, seasonal or otherwise. Try it for free today at ziprecruiter.com/rogan. That's ziprecruiter.com/rogan. Meet your match on ZipRecruiter.

• 33:37Speaker 04

  Take a piss and it was a wet floor. I just fell on the ground at the JFK airport.

• 33:43Speaker 03

  He G. Lenoed.

• 33:44Speaker 04

  I was laying in the bathroom at JFK and he walked in. We had just been fighting. This is an argument loser.

• 33:51Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:52Speaker 04

  You know what I mean? You can't be laying on the floor in a bathroom and be like, actually, I know what I'm talking about. Obviously, I'm the biggest piece of shit that's ever lived.

• 34:00Speaker 03

  You lose no matter what.

• 34:01Speaker 04

  Yeah. If you fall on JFK, you're...

• 34:02Speaker 02

  Like what soaked into your clothes?

• 34:04Speaker 03

  Yeah. But yeah.

• 34:05Speaker 05

  Oh, you go to public bathrooms and the floor is just soaked.

• 34:08Speaker 03

  Soaked.

• 34:10Speaker 05

  You just walk in and you're like...

• 34:13Speaker 03

  High school fool. I was the mascot for my high school.

• 34:15Speaker 04

  No way.

• 34:15Joe Rogan?

  What was it? What kind of outfit?

• 34:17Speaker 03

  I was a cavalier.

• 34:18Speaker 04

  What's that?

• 34:19Speaker 03

  So big head. It's like a pirate.

• 34:20Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 34:21Speaker 03

  And I got fired the first game.

• 34:23Speaker 04

  Oh, no.

• 34:24Speaker 03

  Yeah. Well, I was doing...

• 34:25Speaker 04

  Too many puns?

• 34:25Speaker 03

  It was when this was big.

• 34:28Speaker 04

  You were hitting Suck It?

• 34:29Speaker 03

  I was hitting Suck It and they let me go.

• 34:33Speaker 04

  The Suck It? You were hitting Suck It as a Cavalier?

• 34:36Speaker 03

  That was huge in that.

• 34:36Speaker 04

  That's very not Cavalier. It's funny, uh, when you find out that like, uh, like Hinchcliffe was a fucking umpire in high school baseball.

• 34:44Speaker 03

  What?

• 34:44Speaker 02

  Was it really? What?

• 34:45Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 34:46Joe Rogan?

  Yo, Hinchcliffe can wrestle.

• 34:49Speaker 02

  That ball was so hard.

• 34:50Joe Rogan?

  He can wrestle. He really can wrestle. He had a wrestling match with David Lucas on stage at the fucking after hours. That's how you were there. Yeah, he fucked, he fucked David Lucas up. David Lucas is like 300 pounds.

• 35:00Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 35:01Joe Rogan?

  Hinch, Hinchcliffe can fuck, yeah, up a little. I'm being nice. But Hinchcliffe can fucking wrestle. He can wrestle. He did a duck under, got behind him, pushed him onto his back.

• 35:11Speaker 04

  I believe that.

• 35:11Joe Rogan?

  David Lucas was scrambling, trying to get to his feet. Hinchcliffe was controlling him. He was furious.

• 35:15Speaker 02

  Who was the top?

• 35:16Joe Rogan?

  He couldn't believe it. Tony was the top.

• 35:18Speaker 03

  There you go.

• 35:19Speaker 04

  Yeah, y'all like it.

• 35:20Joe Rogan?

  David was out of, David was out of breath in four seconds.

• 35:23Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 35:24Joe Rogan?

  It was four seconds of exertion and he was ready to have a heart attack.

• 35:26Speaker 04

  Let's go.

• 35:27Speaker 03

  He's got the lizzo body.

• 35:28Joe Rogan?

  Tell that fellow, I gotta clean that up.

• 35:31Speaker 04

  Hinchcliffe.

• 35:33Joe Rogan?

  He almost lost the whole election.

• 35:34Speaker 04

  Yeah, he did.

• 35:35Speaker 02

  No, he gained him votes.

• 35:36Joe Rogan?

  They, they were gonna write stories. They had stories already written that if the election went to Biden or went to Kamala, they were gonna blame Tony Hinchcliffe.

• 35:46Speaker 04

  Who's that?

• 35:47Joe Rogan?

  A bunch of different media outlets.

• 35:48Speaker 04

  It would have been the funniest.

• 35:50Speaker 02

  It's so funny how they thought Latinos just hadn't made up their mind yet.

• 35:54Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 35:54Speaker 02

  And this was enough to sway. They're just a bit racist.

• 35:57Speaker 03

  Well, yeah.

• 35:58Speaker 02

  The Democrats. Just not fully, but a bit.

• 36:00Speaker 03

  Latinos are a big group. They act like it's like.

• 36:02Joe Rogan?

  It's also they leaned on it so hard.

• 36:04Speaker 04

  Yeah, you make fun of Puerto Ricans, the rest of them are gonna be like, yeah.

• 36:06Speaker 02

  Nice.

• 36:07Speaker 03

  Yeah, exactly.

• 36:08Speaker 02

  It's as if you say, if you make fun of Staten Island, the Bronx will be like, how dare you.

• 36:12Speaker 03

  Right.

• 36:12Joe Rogan?

  Right. Exactly.

• 36:13Speaker 03

  But we make fun of Russia, we're white. You know, we're not like, hey, don't fuck with a whitey.

• 36:17Speaker 02

  It was embarrassing.

• 36:17Joe Rogan?

  It was also, it was so lame to be going after that so hard when there's so much wrong with the world.

• 36:23Speaker 03

  Well, they're out of stuff.

• 36:24Speaker 02

  Literally every major city is failing under opioids and homelessness and you're going to.

• 36:28Joe Rogan?

  It's just bad advice. It's just bad advice from the beginning. Like, the very beginning is bad advice.

• 36:33Speaker 02

  Hey, I mean, listen, it's like the, the New York Giants. You're putting some fucking local kid at quarterback. He's gonna do the best he can. Some lady came in with two months to go, like, I don't know, try your best.

• 36:42Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah.

• 36:42Joe Rogan?

  Is it true that she got put in because Biden endorsed her as he was leaving and that that wasn't initially the plan? I've seen that, I've read that several times.

• 36:51Speaker 02

  I thought he like refused to endorse her for a while.

• 36:53Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 36:53Speaker 02

  Actually, I think she pushed him out.

• 36:54Joe Rogan?

  Because she pushed him out, but then, once he did, he found out that allegedly, this is what I had read.

• 36:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 36:59Joe Rogan?

  That they wanted to do a primary, but Biden said publicly, I'll just endorse Kamala. And he didn't think that Kamala could win. This is the allegation.

• 37:07Speaker 02

  So he was like, fuck you.

• 37:09Joe Rogan?

  Look at his smile on his face.

• 37:10Speaker 02

  I think it's D E I. I think nobody can tell a black woman she can't be the one.

• 37:13Joe Rogan?

  But the smile's insane, but a primary can tell you.

• 37:16Speaker 02

  I heard about it, I haven't seen it.

• 37:17Joe Rogan?

  If she crumbles in the primary, the way she crumbled in the primary for president, then if Gavin Newsom or Josh Shapiro, whoever it is that gets the words over on her, that person emerges naturally.

• 37:27Speaker 02

  Right.

• 37:28Joe Rogan?

  It's just like she fucked up. She's just not good. It has nothing to do with anything else.

• 37:31Speaker 02

  No, I talked to a lot of liberals and they were like, this isn't our, this isn't our guy. We wish we could have gotten our guy in there.

• 37:37Speaker 04

  You know what's real nice?

• 37:38Speaker 02

  What?

• 37:38Speaker 04

  The left is the conspiracy people now. They're like, this election was rigged and Trump faked an assassination.

• 37:44Joe Rogan?

  There's a lot of that. Dude, I've heard them talk about how the right, I've heard them talk about how the right has created, I've heard them talk about how the right has created a billion dollar internet ecosystem of podcasts.

• 37:57Speaker 02

  Oh, right.

• 37:58Joe Rogan?

  But imagine that, but imagine that, like as if there's some fucking grand conspiracy where a bunch of people just speak freely. So the right has organized this, and he was comparing it to like radicalizing Islamists.

• 38:11Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 38:11Joe Rogan?

  He was literally comparing it to like young confused people get radicalized, and his take on it is that they could be brought towards feminism.

• 38:20Speaker 03

  No, we're just trying to sell tickets.

• 38:21Speaker 02

  I will say, woke, woke politics has extremely helped all of us here.

• 38:26Speaker 03

  Here, here.

• 38:26Joe Rogan?

  Woke politics has been very beneficial.

• 38:28Speaker 02

  Them coming after us has just raised us up hella.

• 38:30Joe Rogan?

  It also makes you realize you have to say something. You have to say something because they're so insane.

• 38:35Speaker 04

  You did that on purpose, dude. You're a cocksucker. He says hella and he says it fucking wrong.

• 38:40Speaker 02

  No, no, I said it right there.

• 38:41Speaker 03

  Come on, you boomer.

• 38:42Joe Rogan?

  How's he say it?

• 38:43Speaker 02

  But he's. He doesn't know, he's west, he's east coast, I'm west coast.

• 38:45Speaker 04

  Yeah, whatever. You're taking what, Oakland?

• 38:49Joe Rogan?

  You live in New York.

• 38:50Speaker 02

  Yeah, but I have ties.

• 38:52Speaker 03

  You're from Maryland, yeah, he.

• 38:53Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, no, no, you're east coast from birth to now.

• 38:56Speaker 02

  No, none of that. No, I lived in L A for a long time. I became a man in L A.

• 38:59Joe Rogan?

  It didn't work.

• 39:00Speaker 02

  Lost my opportunity there.

• 39:00Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 39:02Speaker 02

  No, yeah, yeah.

• 39:04Speaker 03

  Took the hymen. Started fucking skanks.

• 39:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 39:06Joe Rogan?

  You lost it.

• 39:07Speaker 03

  You lost it in a tunnel.

• 39:07Joe Rogan?

  How old were you when I met you, Ari? You were like twenty-four.

• 39:09Speaker 02

  I was twenty-four, but the, but the development of a fucking sixteen-year-old.

• 39:13Joe Rogan?

  You were an odd fellow.

• 39:14Speaker 03

  Twenty-four?

• 39:15Speaker 02

  Just out of religion. I didn't know anything.

• 39:16Speaker 03

  Well, those old photos of you, you were hideous.

• 39:18Joe Rogan?

  How old were you the first time I took you on the road?

• 39:21Speaker 02

  Twenty-seven, twenty-eight.

• 39:22Speaker 03

  Geez, what was eighty-one?

• 39:23Speaker 02

  But, but, but that twenty-eight was like, really, it was like twenty-two.

• 39:27Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 39:27Speaker 02

  I was just undeveloped.

• 39:28Speaker 03

  Cause of the Diaz story.

• 39:30Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, Diaz just wouldn't.

• 39:32Speaker 03

  He wouldn't show up, so you had to hire him as a backup.

• 39:34Speaker 02

  So instead of just firing your opener who just wouldn't cut, Joe would be at the airport, be like, Joey, where are you? He goes, ah, I'm almost there. In bed, not even getting out of bed. And then eventually Joe was like, I fucking, I don't have an opener again. Instead of just firing Joey, he goes, I guess I'll take two people now.

• 39:49Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 39:49Speaker 02

  So it's either one or two, depending on if Joey showed up.

• 39:52Joe Rogan?

  It was too much fun when Joey showed up.

• 39:54Speaker 02

  It really was.

• 39:55Joe Rogan?

  And I knew, I had a good friend who was a junkie in New York, my friend Johnny, and he died.

• 40:01Speaker 02

  Johnny the pool player?

• 40:01Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. He was my best friend. And he, he died after I was, I was only out here for a couple of years and he died. And it, it really. Yeah, I was in LA and I'd met Joey while he was still alive and I was like, this is the same guy. Like, he's the same kind of guy.

• 40:17Speaker 02

  Get it while you can.

• 40:18Joe Rogan?

  I knew the type. I knew like, and I missed Johnny so much after he was gone. So it was like, whatever I have to do to keep this guy around.

• 40:26Speaker 02

  This is Joey. Joey was still used. He's not using him anymore. He's way healthier. But back then, it was like, the end was in sight.

• 40:31Joe Rogan?

  He was using in a crazy way. He was.

• 40:33Speaker 02

  What was he using?

• 40:33Joe Rogan?

  Coke.

• 40:34Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 40:35Joe Rogan?

  And a bunch of other stuff.

• 40:36Speaker 02

  One time he was like, yeah, I did crack for six months. I'm like, why? Cause the coke dealer was like out of the way home and the crack dealer was on the way home. It was just easier.

• 40:44Joe Rogan?

  He was, Joey was off the rails, but.

• 40:47Speaker 02

  Rails.

• 40:48Joe Rogan?

  If he loved you, he was your best friend. He was like one of the best friends you could ever have, if he loved you.

• 40:54Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 40:55Joe Rogan?

  And so I was like, I gotta do whatever I gotta do. So I didn't wanna push him. So I would always tell him, you know, if you ever need help, I'll help you. He knows, I don't need no fucking help. But when we would go on the road, if he would just not show up, I would say, listen. Anytime you want to go on the road with me, you're gonna get paid. You're gonna, you can work with me anytime you want, but I'm gonna bring another opening act.

• 41:19Joe Rogan?

  If you don't show up.

• 41:22Speaker 02

  Thank you Joey for being such a cokehead.

• 41:26Joe Rogan?

  It was only like three times over the course of like 10 years.

• 41:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 41:30Joe Rogan?

  It's like three times. Not that bad, not that bad. But it was like big weekends, you know, like, like, I was headlining at Rascals in New Jersey. I was like, shit.

• 41:40Speaker 02

  This is a big one.

• 41:40Joe Rogan?

  This is a big one. And then they had to use a local gun. So it's like, and I was thinking I was gonna hang out with Joey and I'm hanging out with this guy. Which is half of the fun of being on the road is being on the road with your friends. It's literally half.

• 41:52Speaker 02

  One time we were going to Pittsburgh and I had booked a commercial. I was like, dude, I gotta miss the Thursday show. And Joe was like, fuck that. No, dude, you can't do that. Like, we had a thing and I was like, I need this for insurance. And he's like, no, fuck that. Uh, I'll just use somebody local. And then, Friday night, he's like, this city smells like suicide. Come down.

• 42:08Joe Rogan?

  The local was terrible.

• 42:10Speaker 03

  What was the commercial? Can we watch that? Was it Activia?

• 42:13Speaker 02

  I think it was, I don't know which one it was. IBA maybe or something.

• 42:16Speaker 03

  Oh, wow. That's big money.

• 42:18Speaker 02

  I used to do a lot of them.

• 42:19Speaker 03

  Commercials were big back in the day.

• 42:20Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 42:21Joe Rogan?

  Everybody wanted a commercial first. That was like attainable. If you got a commercial, you paid your bills.

• 42:25Speaker 02

  It was a substitute teaching or dog walking.

• 42:28Joe Rogan?

  If you got on a sitcom, that was the, the holy grail.

• 42:31Speaker 02

  Yeah, that was.

• 42:31Speaker 03

  Gaffigan was the Hemi guy. Remember that?

• 42:33Speaker 02

  No, no, no, no, no. That's John Reed.

• 42:35Speaker 03

  Oh, sorry, Reed.

• 42:36Speaker 02

  No, but Gaffigan did like 80 commercials.

• 42:38Speaker 03

  He did a ton of commercials.

• 42:39Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, he's got that squeaky clean.

• 42:41Speaker 02

  First special on Hulu.

• 42:42Joe Rogan?

  Oh, nice.

• 42:43Speaker 03

  Is that right?

• 42:44Joe Rogan?

  Hilarious. Hilarious, yeah, I was gonna say.

• 42:49Speaker 02

  Why do non-comics choose how they're gonna comedy promote?

• 42:52Joe Rogan?

  How about just Hulu comedy? Shut the fuck up. Like, don't do that. Don't do that. Don't get, go all up in your business.

• 42:59Speaker 03

  Is Joey comedy's Hunter Biden?

• 43:01Speaker 02

  Ooh, maybe.

• 43:02Joe Rogan?

  Joey is a, he's a completely unique human. He's not anybody's anything. He's a, he's a one of a kind.

• 43:08Speaker 03

  Sweet guy.

• 43:09Joe Rogan?

  He's the best. And he's great now. Still amazing on stage.

• 43:13Speaker 02

  He borrowed 200 bucks from me when I was starting and I didn't have it. And he's like, can I borrow 200 bucks? But it was like, this is bullying for sure. And then like, I gave it to him. I'm like, okay. I had to be like, all right, at least I'll never have to give that to him again. And then like four days later, he's like, here you go. Thanks.

• 43:26Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 43:27Speaker 02

  Oh, okay. I guess we're not, we're not friends.

• 43:29Joe Rogan?

  That's a setup. That's a move up.

• 43:31Speaker 02

  Can I get a thousand now?

• 43:32Joe Rogan?

  And then he vanishes. It's when he's going back to Colorado, he gets a thousand out of you.

• 43:35Speaker 02

  So he just can't vanish. Yeah.

• 43:37Joe Rogan?

  He knows he's giving it back to you. Joey's the best.

• 43:40Speaker 03

  He's doing sets again around town.

• 43:42Joe Rogan?

  Beautiful.

• 43:43Speaker 03

  All over Jersey.

• 43:44Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he was supposed to be here for a weekend in December, but I think he canceled.

• 43:47Speaker 03

  You don't say.

• 43:48Joe Rogan?

  I think he was on for a couple of days. It's like he wants to, when he's here, he's back in the flow of things. He realizes how much he misses it, but it's hard to get the energy to fly to another state.

• 44:00Speaker 03

  And he's so fat.

• 44:02Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 44:02Speaker 03

  It's gotta be tough.

• 44:03Joe Rogan?

  It's not.

• 44:04Speaker 02

  He's been fatter. He's not so bad.

• 44:06Joe Rogan?

  Oh, bro, he got huge.

• 44:08Speaker 02

  As, yeah, he's fine.

• 44:10Joe Rogan?

  When I met him, he wasn't fat at all. When I met Joey, he was like a linebacker. He was fucking huge. He was like this big guy. Like intimidating guy. He was thin, like big barrel-chested fucking dude. And then when he got fat, he got really funny. It's literally what happened. He stopped giving a fuck about being on TV. He's like, this is a pipe dream. It's never gonna happen. Stopped giving a fuck about being in movies and he just started being himself.

• 44:33Speaker 02

  He would do the Cuban negro. He'd get a towel from the back that the handyman used to use and he'd use it as a cape.

• 44:40Speaker 02

  And he'd just walk and shake his pants down. Big influence on me. Shake his pants down.

• 44:45Joe Rogan?

  His pants never fit right because his belly would push his pants down.

• 44:51Joe Rogan?

  Did you ever see my magazine, my, uh, the album that I've recorded in like 1999? I took a bunch of pictures of Joey and they're in the album sleeve and one of them is Joey buck naked with combat boots on. I think he has Timberlands on and he's got a cape.

• 45:07Speaker 02

  Cape.

• 45:08Joe Rogan?

  And he's got this cape on, but he's completely naked. It was inside the album cover. Big belly, hog hanging out.

• 45:16Speaker 03

  That was fun.

• 45:18Joe Rogan?

  Allowed to like show a guy's dick inside of an, uh, CD cover back then.

• 45:23Speaker 02

  He did it on a man show. He came out naked.

• 45:25Speaker 03

  More like ED.

• 45:26Joe Rogan?

  Well, we did two versions. Comedy Central insisted that we do one where Joey wasn't naked. We did. It was fine. And then we did it where Joey came out naked and like, let's get this party started. It was huge. Everybody died laughing. I'm like, yeah. Listen to me.

• 45:40Speaker 03

  Nah.

• 45:41Joe Rogan?

  I know what I'm doing here. This is, this is.

• 45:42Speaker 02

  Let's try just a man in clothes coming out.

• 45:45Joe Rogan?

  You can't have a show like Joey.

• 45:48Speaker 02

  What is that then?

• 45:49Joe Rogan?

  If you were gonna do a Joey show today, you could not do it with any sort of a network or corporation. You'd have to do it like Gillian Keef style, or you're in control of it. Like, imagine the fucking OnlyFans dad. Imagine someone giving you production notes on OnlyFans dad.

• 46:09Speaker 02

  Production notes, too.

• 46:10Joe Rogan?

  Show me OnlyFans dad, Jamie. Go to OnlyFans dad.

• 46:13Speaker 02

  You gotta figure out a way to tell them that.

• 46:15Speaker 03

  Oh my god.

• 46:19Speaker 02

  That's such a visceral laugh.

• 46:22Speaker 03

  Wow, he's like the Riz. He's like the Rizler.

• 46:25Speaker 02

  Like a Rogan with a small head.

• 46:27Speaker 04

  Dude, he looks exactly like the Rizler.

• 46:29Joe Rogan?

  Go to, uh, OnlyFans dad.

• 46:32Speaker 03

  Was that a fun gig?

• 46:33Speaker 02

  No.

• 46:33Joe Rogan?

  It wasn't. It was a disaster.

• 46:34Speaker 03

  I can't do it.

• 46:35Speaker 04

  Jamie, don't show my.

• 46:37Joe Rogan?

  It was a disaster.

• 46:38Speaker 03

  Really?

• 46:38Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, because it all happened right around the same time that the Janet Jackson nipple thing happened. And so everybody panicked and all, a bunch of stuff that we had gotten approved.

• 46:49Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 46:49Joe Rogan?

  A bunch of ideas.

• 46:50Speaker 02

  What was wrong with that?

• 46:51Joe Rogan?

  Doug had some ridiculous ideas.

• 46:52Speaker 02

  FCC came in hard.

• 46:53Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 46:53Speaker 02

  They blurred his cock.

• 46:54Joe Rogan?

  Everybody was in a panic. It was just the mindset in Hollywood.

• 46:58Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 46:58Joe Rogan?

  It was like toned down all the outrageousness. You can get in trouble.

• 47:01Speaker 02

  By the way, not even that great a nipple. I didn't think her nipple was that. I thought there was a pacy on it.

• 47:05Joe Rogan?

  It's, no, it was a nipple.

• 47:07Speaker 03

  Pull it up.

• 47:07Joe Rogan?

  They showed the actual nipple.

• 47:08Speaker 02

  I.

• 47:09Joe Rogan?

  I think.

• 47:09Speaker 02

  I was, I would have remembered. Me and my friends stood up and cheered.

• 47:12Joe Rogan?

  It was a huge scandal. If it was just a pacy, that's crazy.

• 47:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 47:15Joe Rogan?

  Was it really just a pacy?

• 47:17Speaker 04

  It had a nipple ring, I think.

• 47:18Speaker 03

  No, there was no ring.

• 47:20Speaker 02

  Let's see it. Don't show it on screen. Let's, let us see it.

• 47:22Joe Rogan?

  Show it to us.

• 47:23Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 47:24Joe Rogan?

  That's a nipple sign. That's a real nipple sign.

• 47:26Speaker 03

  That's a black nip.

• 47:27Joe Rogan?

  Let's go.

• 47:27Speaker 04

  Metal ring.

• 47:28Joe Rogan?

  She's got a crazy sun on that. That's a hypnotic Eyes Wide Shut ring.

• 47:32Speaker 03

  I like it.

• 47:33Joe Rogan?

  Look at that. They made it set up.

• 47:34Speaker 02

  Fucking moron.

• 47:35Joe Rogan?

  You can see how it's got snaps.

• 47:37Speaker 02

  But why would you have a tear away?

• 47:38Speaker 03

  That was a Super Bowl, right?

• 47:39Joe Rogan?

  Cause they wanted to show some titty.

• 47:41Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 47:42Joe Rogan?

  Let's have some fun.

• 47:43Speaker 03

  Thought my mascot job was bad.

• 47:44Joe Rogan?

  So that freaks so many people out that they stopped, like, anything controversial?

• 47:49Speaker 02

  It was a.

• 47:50Speaker 03

  Order second. Ooh, look at Kylie, or Kendra, or whatever the fuck her name is. The Kardashian.

• 47:56Speaker 02

  Mark's just hard.

• 47:57Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah. She's the hottest Kardashian, I think.

• 48:00Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, I think so.

• 48:01Joe Rogan?

  You've got choices?

• 48:02Speaker 03

  Well, there's so many of those whores.

• 48:04Speaker 02

  Kim looks like an alien. Kim looks like a full alien.

• 48:08Joe Rogan?

  Does she?

• 48:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:09Speaker 03

  Ah, she still looks good.

• 48:10Speaker 02

  It's like made from, it made in a lab.

• 48:11Joe Rogan?

  Is that because you know what she used to look like, or is it because?

• 48:15Speaker 02

  No, I saw a picture of her on a billboard, like, what the fuck is that? And someone's like, that's Kim Kardashian?

• 48:19Speaker 03

  No, she's pretty.

• 48:21Speaker 02

  Pretty, but like, but like, it's like an AI. No, she's hot, but she still looks like made in a lab.

• 48:27Speaker 03

  Right now. He was inside those guts.

• 48:30Joe Rogan?

  Didn't he, like, burn her name on his arm or some crazy shit?

• 48:34Speaker 03

  Oh, boy.

• 48:35Speaker 04

  I have no idea.

• 48:36Speaker 02

  Pete's all together.

• 48:37Joe Rogan?

  That sounds like a good move.

• 48:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 48:39Speaker 04

  Yeah, that's a, that's a, my bad.

• 48:43Speaker 04

  Two weeks later, you go, fuck.

• 48:45Speaker 02

  Ah, I don't know what I was thinking on that one.

• 48:48Speaker 03

  Yeah, and don't get any tattoos of ladies. So I think Johnny Depp got Winona, and then he changed it to Win-o.

• 48:53Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. He got one on his fingers, too.

• 48:56Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 48:56Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 48:57Speaker 02

  Johnny Depp fucked Winona? Beck fucked Winona, too.

• 49:00Speaker 03

  No way.

• 49:00Speaker 02

  Buck wrote a whole album about her.

• 49:02Speaker 03

  Beck? Oh, Beck. Damn.

• 49:04Speaker 04

  Forgot about Beck. What do you guys, I don't know any of this stuff.

• 49:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, Sea Change was all about her. He said he couldn't write it for two years after he broke up with her.

• 49:10Speaker 03

  Jesus, boy.

• 49:10Speaker 02

  Everyone knows your name or something like that. It's all about, like, you fucked everyone in this town, I gotta deal with this.

• 49:14Speaker 03

  Whoa, Sea Change.

• 49:16Speaker 02

  It was one of the greatest albums of all time.

• 49:18Speaker 03

  Come on.

• 49:19Speaker 02

  No, it really was. The, the, an amazing breakup album.

• 49:22Joe Rogan?

  Beck's a weird one.

• 49:24Speaker 02

  Scientologist.

• 49:25Joe Rogan?

  He's a Scientologist.

• 49:25Speaker 04

  Is he?

• 49:26Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 49:27Speaker 02

  Me and Bobby went to see him at a Scientology show in Hollywood.

• 49:31Joe Rogan?

  What's that like?

• 49:32Speaker 02

  I mean, it was just about the music, but only Scientologists and me and a fucking hooker fucker were.

• 49:37Speaker 04

  I bet Scientologists were a good time, though.

• 49:39Speaker 02

  They were great.

• 49:40Speaker 04

  They're probably nuts.

• 49:40Speaker 02

  They were great.

• 49:41Joe Rogan?

  They have to be.

• 49:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 49:42Joe Rogan?

  You know the guy who wrote it? There's video of him.

• 49:44Speaker 03

  L. Ron?

• 49:45Speaker 02

  Really?

• 49:45Joe Rogan?

  There's a video of him. He was a fucking completely insane person. He was a completely insane, he wrote the most words of fiction ever in human history.

• 49:54Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 49:55Speaker 02

  More than Shakespeare?

• 49:56Joe Rogan?

  More than everyone. He never had a second draft.

• 49:58Speaker 04

  It's just science fiction, it was gibberish.

• 50:00Joe Rogan?

  It's, no, no, no, it's not just gibberish.

• 50:02Speaker 02

  Oh, really?

• 50:03Joe Rogan?

  Oh, it's horrible. His, his science fiction is horrible.

• 50:08Speaker 03

  But it was like a best seller. He was huge.

• 50:09Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, not really. Dianetics was a best seller, but he just posts just a lot of these like crazy science fiction stories in like these magazines and books that they used to be like monthly publications in the 50s and the 60s.

• 50:21Speaker 03

  But he had that machine too. What was that machine that like?

• 50:24Joe Rogan?

  The E-meter?

• 50:25Speaker 03

  E-meter?

• 50:26Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's all nonsense.

• 50:27Speaker 02

  It's just, it's just two, it's just two cans with a string.

• 50:30Speaker 03

  Yeah. I did it. He pulled off.

• 50:32Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I did it.

• 50:33Speaker 03

  You did it?

• 50:33Joe Rogan?

  I was in San Diego.

• 50:34Speaker 02

  How clear were you?

• 50:35Joe Rogan?

  I was, I'm clear as fuck, bro.

• 50:36Speaker 02

  No way. I'm like, no, we don't need you. You're good.

• 50:40Joe Rogan?

  The dude, I could tell. It was really kind of like, he was super unmotivated. He was a guy who was a member who they're forcing to go and try to like recruit people. And I was out there filming for a television show in San Diego. And so I went to this, they had like a thing in the park. And I just went, oh, we had downtime. So I'm like, what are you guys doing?

• 50:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:57Joe Rogan?

  And then he's like, oh, you know, Dianetics, this and that. Have you ever had your E-meter tested, whatever?

• 51:01Speaker 02

  Fired up. I got time.

• 51:02Joe Rogan?

  I'm sorry.

• 51:03Speaker 02

  Fired up?

• 51:04Joe Rogan?

  I was asking the dude a bunch of questions. I was high. So I was asking the dude a ton of questions. Just like, what is this?

• 51:11Speaker 02

  If you were high, they were probably getting you.

• 51:12Joe Rogan?

  Where did you, uh, where'd you learn all this stuff from? Like, what's, what's the story behind your religion? I started asking, and you could tell the dude just didn't want to do it.

• 51:20Speaker 03

  Ah.

• 51:21Joe Rogan?

  He was not interested in recruiting anybody. He was just like, like, I have to do this.

• 51:25Speaker 02

  Going for the credits?

• 51:26Joe Rogan?

  You have to do it. Yeah, he's cool credits.

• 51:28Speaker 03

  But the problem is you got nothing to hide. All those Scientology queefs, they're all hiding something.

• 51:31Speaker 02

  Dude, I went.

• 51:32Speaker 03

  They're gay. How much of it is gay?

• 51:34Speaker 02

  I went with Natasha Leggero, went down to the one in Vermont.

• 51:37Joe Rogan?

  Just be gay.

• 51:37Speaker 02

  And we went in there, you watch a video, it's all like mid-level 80s actors. And then they say, this book is for ages eight to 8,008. And I'm like, what does that mean? The guy's like, ah, don't worry about it.

• 51:47Joe Rogan?

  Fucking nothing.

• 51:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 51:49Speaker 03

  No, it means you can't.

• 51:50Speaker 02

  What does that mean? Ah, well, it's, it's more advanced stuff.

• 51:52Joe Rogan?

  You're not ready for that.

• 51:53Speaker 02

  Yeah, and then they go, and then they go, can we get your address so we can send you more stuff? And I'm like, oh, I don't know. Like, let me just get your address. I'm like, okay. And Natasha's like, what are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing? Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't.

• 52:02Joe Rogan?

  Bobby Lee's address.

• 52:05Speaker 03

  My name is Bobby Lee.

• 52:08Joe Rogan?

  Lee could be a white guy.

• 52:09Speaker 02

  He could be a Bobby Lee. Yeah.

• 52:11Speaker 04

  Yeah, Robert E.

• 52:12Joe Rogan?

  They were sending me shit for. They were sending me shit for a solid decade.

• 52:18Speaker 02

  You know who I still get calls from? The fucking ivermectin people.

• 52:22Joe Rogan?

  Nice.

• 52:22Speaker 02

  For four years.

• 52:23Joe Rogan?

  What do they want?

• 52:24Speaker 02

  They want me to buy more drugs. I'm like, I'm not gonna buy. They go, it could come back.

• 52:29Joe Rogan?

  Do you know how risky?

• 52:31Speaker 04

  Shut up.

• 52:31Joe Rogan?

  How, how much of a risk taker do you have to be to say, what else you got? What else you sell on?

• 52:35Speaker 03

  I'm still getting hit up by Tim Walz. I get texts.

• 52:39Speaker 04

  What's Tim up to?

• 52:40Speaker 03

  They want more money.

• 52:41Joe Rogan?

  He needs money.

• 52:42Speaker 03

  They lost a lot of money on Beyonce.

• 52:44Joe Rogan?

  Twenty million in the hole. Bro, they blew a billion dollars. Tim Walz, the vice presidential candidate?

• 52:49Speaker 02

  Oh, the other one?

• 52:50Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. The vice. He's, he's the vice.

• 52:53Speaker 03

  The fake Hunter, fake football coach.

• 52:55Joe Rogan?

  He's a fucking fuck up, full on liar.

• 52:57Speaker 04

  Lying about football is crazy.

• 52:58Joe Rogan?

  Lying about, everything's crazy.

• 52:59Speaker 02

  That's, that's, that's Shane Stone Valor. That's his most.

• 53:03Speaker 04

  I didn't care about lying about going to war.

• 53:06Joe Rogan?

  Or going to war.

• 53:07Speaker 02

  Being an assistant?

• 53:08Joe Rogan?

  Or being in Tiananmen Square.

• 53:09Speaker 04

  That was a wild one.

• 53:10Joe Rogan?

  Bro, you lied about everything.

• 53:11Speaker 04

  Lying about being a head coach and you were a fucking dork assistant?

• 53:15Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you're carrying, carrying water.

• 53:17Speaker 02

  Remember Hillary Clinton did it too, with, with Benghazi, right? She was like, I was there, we're under fire.

• 53:21Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 53:22Speaker 03

  Who's Benghazi? Wait a minute.

• 53:25Joe Rogan?

  You son of a.

• 53:26Speaker 02

  Everybody.

• 53:26Speaker 03

  McDonald's was a lie too, wasn't it?

• 53:28Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that was a lie too. Not only that, but they photoshopped. They photoshopped her face on an existing photograph of a girl from the 1980s that did work at McDonald's. It was a white girl. So they photoshopped Kamala's face. Just some internet jackass did it, I'm sure, and said, oh, we have proof. But they were trying to pass it off as it was real.

• 53:47Speaker 03

  But why is working McDonald's good?

• 53:49Speaker 02

  Because it's victim me. It's like the lowest level. It's the lowest level job.

• 53:52Speaker 03

  But why is that? Who cares?

• 53:53Joe Rogan?

  You're working class.

• 53:54Speaker 02

  In these days, when you're gonna brag about your, your hardships.

• 53:57Speaker 04

  If you came from McDonald's to the president, it's pretty sick.

• 53:59Joe Rogan?

  Also, when you're a person who's like trying to con their way into a job where you're gonna make an insane amount of money. It's really cool to say, start it from the bottom now.

• 54:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 54:09Speaker 03

  I see, I see.

• 54:10Joe Rogan?

  Start it from the bottom now.

• 54:11Speaker 04

  Shout out Drake, dude.

• 54:13Speaker 02

  I, I talked to some Puerto Ricans about, about, uh, Jenny from the block. And and they were like, she was like, ah, I got a ham sandwich with Fanta. If you know, you know. And then they're like, Drescher was like, that's not a thing. What are you talking about? What are you talking about? You heard it from someone.

• 54:27Joe Rogan?

  A ham sandwich with Fanta. She's been famous for 80 years. She doesn't even know what it means to be normal. Like, why are you pretending you know it? You were a fly girl.

• 54:35Speaker 02

  They all love pretending.

• 54:37Joe Rogan?

  Everyone, everyone wants to be real.

• 54:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 54:40Joe Rogan?

  It's hard. You feel insecure if you've made it too far.

• 54:42Speaker 02

  You should go. No, my dad was an academic and I grew up in wealth, so that's why I'm smarter than everybody.

• 54:47Speaker 03

  Well, I knew friends who worked at McDonald's. They would hide it. They were like, don't tell anybody.

• 54:50Joe Rogan?

  That's a very Ari take on things, though.

• 54:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, you're well trained.

• 54:52Speaker 04

  No, it is fun to be like, oh, sorry, my dad worked hard.

• 54:55Speaker 02

  Who are you talking about?

• 54:56Speaker 04

  Sorry, your dad was a fucking loser and left your mom, and my dad worked really hard.

• 55:00Speaker 02

  Really hard. Good luck with your campus job.

• 55:03Joe Rogan?

  That you'll never understand the struggle, because you never had to struggle. That's what it is.

• 55:08Speaker 03

  Yeah, she really blew it.

• 55:09Speaker 02

  My favorite is multimillion dollar Hollywood saying it's hard.

• 55:13Joe Rogan?

  That's terrible.

• 55:16Joe Rogan?

  Well, did you get it?

• 55:17Speaker 03

  Did I miss it? Did I miss it?

• 55:21Speaker 04

  Get it?

• 55:22Joe Rogan?

  I should have known it wasn't a statement.

• 55:23Speaker 02

  Tell her, tell her, tell her.

• 55:24Joe Rogan?

  I can't redo it.

• 55:24Speaker 02

  You can't redo it.

• 55:25Joe Rogan?

  I was listening to it like it was a statement. I should have known. I should have known better.

• 55:29Speaker 03

  She blew it and she lost the election?

• 55:31Joe Rogan?

  Oh, I get it. All right.

• 55:32Speaker 04

  That was a blowjob joke.

• 55:34Joe Rogan?

  It was a blowjob joke.

• 55:35Speaker 03

  There's a bunch of those out there. Willie Brown.

• 55:37Speaker 02

  Dude, she, I bet she fucks really good in her prime.

• 55:41Speaker 03

  That's what I was getting at.

• 55:41Speaker 04

  Who?

• 55:42Speaker 02

  Kamala. Yeah.

• 55:43Joe Rogan?

  She was hot when she was young.

• 55:44Speaker 02

  I bet she fucks.

• 55:45Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 55:45Joe Rogan?

  There's videos of her with Montel Williams.

• 55:47Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 55:48Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 55:49Speaker 02

  Mountain top.

• 55:50Speaker 03

  Is that your daughter, they said?

• 55:51Joe Rogan?

  And, oh, that was with Willie Brown. It's like, no. She got real mad. No. This is funny. That was funny.

• 55:57Speaker 03

  She's working her way up. That's something to brag about. Fuck McDonald's.

• 56:00Joe Rogan?

  It's a strategy. Why is that any less of a strategy than a pharmaceutical executive strategy?

• 56:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's the same.

• 56:05Joe Rogan?

  Why is it, why, why is it like using your good looks to your advantage and making your way into a political system that's fucking completely corrupt? Why is that, why is that negative?

• 56:17Speaker 04

  Matt Rife did it.

• 56:17Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he did.

• 56:18Speaker 03

  Use those looks. Why not?

• 56:20Joe Rogan?

  He did. Smart move.

• 56:21Speaker 03

  Yeah, he's hot.

• 56:22Speaker 02

  It's pretty shocking Adrian Appalucci has a special.

• 56:25Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but that just shows you how funny she is. It shows you how funny she is.

• 56:29Speaker 03

  Joey Diaz, buddy.

• 56:31Joe Rogan?

  She's lost a lot of weight.

• 56:32Speaker 02

  Has she?

• 56:33Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, she's lost a lot of weight.

• 56:34Speaker 03

  Big mistake. Fat is funny.

• 56:36Joe Rogan?

  She's still fat.

• 56:37Speaker 02

  She's still fat. Don't get it wrong.

• 56:38Joe Rogan?

  Still holding it down.

• 56:39Speaker 02

  She's still holding it.

• 56:40Joe Rogan?

  But she's not ass.

• 56:42Speaker 02

  Not ass.

• 56:43Joe Rogan?

  She's so funny too.

• 56:45Speaker 03

  Funny lady.

• 56:46Speaker 02

  Oh, she rules.

• 56:46Joe Rogan?

  And fearless. Goes for it. Just goes for it.

• 56:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, to eat like a head.

• 56:50Speaker 02

  I think she doesn't give a fuck. She doesn't give a fuck. I don't think she understands to give a fuck. Like, she actually doesn't care. She's pretty great. When people walk out angry, she goes, "Yeah, I guess I get it."

• 56:59Joe Rogan?

  She's moving here.

• 57:01Speaker 03

  No way.

• 57:02Speaker 02

  She's been loving it so far.

• 57:03Speaker 03

  Whoa, really?

• 57:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 57:05Joe Rogan?

  We talked her into it. Ari helped me. He, uh, reached out to me. He said, "You gotta talk Adrian into moving here." And I had her on the cloud. Well, she was already convinced.

• 57:12Speaker 02

  She was like, "Did you tell Rogan on me that I might be like, yeah, I tried to pressure you?"

• 57:17Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, she's funny, man. We need more. And she's funny in a different way. Like, she's got her own vibe. She's not like anybody else. It's fun.

• 57:25Speaker 03

  Yeah. I like her.

• 57:27Speaker 02

  It's so like, at both sides, fuck both of you. Yeah.

• 57:31Joe Rogan?

  Yep, yep. Fuck everybody.

• 57:32Speaker 02

  And just serious. Never smiles once on stage.

• 57:35Speaker 03

  Nah, from the Bronx.

• 57:36Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 57:37Speaker 02

  Yeah, the reviews of her specials either, "I haven't seen it yet," or "It's great."

• 57:41Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's awesome.

• 57:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 57:43Speaker 03

  Her mom was a comic.

• 57:44Joe Rogan?

  Oh, shit.

• 57:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 57:46Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's right. Yeah, she told me that story.

• 57:48Speaker 02

  Really?

• 57:48Joe Rogan?

  Oh, jeez.

• 57:49Speaker 02

  Who, who, who'd you, who booked you that?

• 57:52Speaker 03

  Oh, no.

• 57:54Joe Rogan?

  Oh, god.

• 57:54Speaker 03

  That's tough.

• 57:55Joe Rogan?

  Didn't her mom start doing it again after she'd been doing it a while? Didn't her mom try to do it again?

• 57:59Speaker 02

  Maybe.

• 58:00Joe Rogan?

  Maybe, am I remembering that right?

• 58:02Speaker 03

  Oof.

• 58:03Speaker 02

  That's tough.

• 58:03Speaker 03

  Imagine going to a club, see your mom there, like, ah.

• 58:06Joe Rogan?

  Bro, it's probably better than your dad.

• 58:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, or your ex-wife.

• 58:10Joe Rogan?

  If your dad sucked as a comic.

• 58:10Speaker 02

  My dad thinks he's really funny and he was, he was...

• 58:12Speaker 03

  It's funny.

• 58:13Speaker 02

  My dad's very funny, but he was like, put me, put me in tires. He was like joking. But I could tell my mom, like, my mom was like, "Just put him in the show."

• 58:24Speaker 04

  I'm not putting my fucking dad in this show.

• 58:27Joe Rogan?

  Why not?

• 58:27Speaker 04

  He's not, I don't know if he could act.

• 58:29Speaker 03

  Well, no.

• 58:29Speaker 02

  You gotta give like, you gotta give him like a one line.

• 58:32Joe Rogan?

  It doesn't work like that.

• 58:33Speaker 02

  One line, get him out of there.

• 58:34Joe Rogan?

  Go start acting.

• 58:35Speaker 04

  I would like that, but then he had a heart attack, so he's on the sidelines for a while.

• 58:40Speaker 03

  Is he alright?

• 58:40Speaker 04

  Yeah, he's good.

• 58:41Speaker 03

  Alright.

• 58:41Speaker 04

  But he's bad, he's not allowed to drink, which is tough to watch the old man.

• 58:45Speaker 03

  Poor guy.

• 58:46Speaker 04

  Having, watching him fucking sit there watching football.

• 58:49Speaker 02

  You gotta get him to weed.

• 58:50Joe Rogan?

  He goes sober.

• 58:51Speaker 02

  Damn. You gotta get him to weed.

• 58:52Speaker 04

  He's, he's working his way back so he can drink.

• 58:55Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 58:56Speaker 02

  It's an incentivizer.

• 58:57Speaker 04

  He's just like, literally, he's working, he's working on his heart, so he has to do like cardio, like he just goes on long walks. He's like, I'll be back.

• 59:04Speaker 02

  Just so he can drink.

• 59:06Joe Rogan?

  Start him on me for Phil Gill, so crazy, he's like, I need my poison.

• 59:10Speaker 02

  I need it, I'll do whatever it takes.

• 59:12Speaker 04

  Dude, he was in the hospital, my mom didn't tell me how bad it was to like not freak us out, and then I got there and he was like, fucking like.

• 59:20Speaker 04

  Like he had fluid in his lungs, so they couldn't operate, so he was like, this could be it, and we're sitting there, and they were like, yeah, well, you're gonna have to stop drinking, and he was like, sixty-eight years old, had a hell of a run. Yeah, dude.

• 59:35Speaker 02

  What?

• 59:35Speaker 04

  It was a nice like, no, a hell of a run with drinking, it was just very nice to be like, yeah, you did, bro.

• 59:40Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, correct.

• 59:41Speaker 04

  That's a hell of a run.

• 59:42Joe Rogan?

  Get him on edibles.

• 59:43Speaker 02

  Get him started at least, give him an option.

• 59:45Speaker 04

  I don't know how I'll handle it, it'll be funny.

• 59:47Joe Rogan?

  This is, you get, you start him with a five milligram, just a little jammy that gives you a little smile on your face.

• 59:51Speaker 04

  He's gonna be.

• 59:52Joe Rogan?

  Makes the colors a little, a little brighter.

• 59:53Speaker 02

  Give him a couple to get started.

• 59:54Joe Rogan?

  Makes you wanna hug more people.

• 59:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, give him a couple to get started.

• 59:58Speaker 04

  Getting high and be like, I, I know he's gonna pass for five thousand yards.

• 1:00:01Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, maybe he'll have good intuition.

• 1:00:03Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:00:04Joe Rogan?

  He might have like some weed based intuition.

• 1:00:05Speaker 04

  He's skinny now, he's walking around, he's.

• 1:00:07Speaker 02

  Boo.

• 1:00:08Speaker 04

  He's in, he's in hell, dude, he's in hell, he's stuck in the house with my mom all day, she loves it.

• 1:00:13Joe Rogan?

  Is he eating healthy?

• 1:00:14Speaker 04

  Yeah, he has to, but you'll, we'll catch him, we'll catch him.

• 1:00:18Speaker 03

  Get him some wings.

• 1:00:18Speaker 04

  He's just fucking eating burgers.

• 1:00:22Speaker 02

  He's eating them at night.

• 1:00:23Speaker 04

  I went, yeah. By the way, he actually is. Like, you'll be over there, you'll see him at the fridge like.

• 1:00:30Speaker 03

  Give me that cheese daddy.

• 1:00:31Speaker 02

  Oh, he goes in there, eats and then pulls out one water.

• 1:00:34Joe Rogan?

  Rolls the car in neutral out of the driveway, starts it on the streets, it can go over the burger king in the middle of the night, he's eating like Trump.

• 1:00:42Speaker 04

  Get air, you pushing it.

• 1:00:43Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you pushing the car out.

• 1:00:45Speaker 04

  It was funny, he was eating when I got home, the last time I went home to see him, he was literally standing at the counter eating a cheeseburger, and I was like, bro.

• 1:00:51Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 1:00:52Speaker 04

  He's like, what?

• 1:00:54Speaker 03

  He's gotta have some, he needs a vice.

• 1:00:55Speaker 04

  He's, the, the boy's working his way back to beer.

• 1:00:58Joe Rogan?

  That's good, well, he's gonna get lost weight, that's good.

• 1:01:00Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:01:00Speaker 03

  You should have him on.

• 1:01:01Speaker 04

  Fell on?

• 1:01:02Speaker 03

  Fell on.

• 1:01:03Speaker 04

  Phil's got some good stories, dude.

• 1:01:05Joe Rogan?

  I bet he does. But then he's like, "Look, I've been in the JRE, tires is next."

• 1:01:08Speaker 04

  Tires on the beer.

• 1:01:10Joe Rogan?

  Tires is next, come on, it's a likely second step.

• 1:01:13Speaker 03

  Ah, wait about are you garbage? I bet he's got some stories.

• 1:01:17Speaker 04

  He was fucking garbage.

• 1:01:18Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:19Speaker 04

  He was garbage as fuck. He was from like, he lived in like a. He went on are you garbage? No, no, I'm just saying.

• 1:01:25Joe Rogan?

  Oh, I thought you were serious.

• 1:01:26Speaker 04

  He's pretty rich.

• 1:01:26Joe Rogan?

  I did go on are you garbage.

• 1:01:27Speaker 03

  The island of Puerto Rico should go on are you garbage.

• 1:01:29Joe Rogan?

  You son of a bitch. We gotta, that's the last, we gotta remove that from the internet.

• 1:01:34Speaker 03

  No, I love Puerto Rico. San Juan, baby.

• 1:01:37Joe Rogan?

  That's the Tony joke.

• 1:01:38Speaker 04

  What a wild thing.

• 1:01:39Joe Rogan?

  The fucked up thing is that joke was based on his need to like, he, he gets freaked out about the environment. He gets freaked out about the pu- the pollution patch.

• 1:01:47Speaker 04

  While he's in a throne.

• 1:01:47Joe Rogan?

  We were super high, we were super high in the green room.

• 1:01:51Speaker 03

  In the regular world.

• 1:01:52Joe Rogan?

  He's like, dude, he's like, how long have there been plastic? There's only been plastic for six years, it's bigger than fucking Texas. It's in the, and so he sits getting obsessed by garbage, then he finds out about Puerto Rico. And so then he comes up with this joke, there's an island of garbage, I think it's called Puerto Rico.

• 1:02:05Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:02:06Joe Rogan?

  And it's like, but the joke was actually out of his concern that Puerto Rico is being smothered by gar- he actually loves Puerto Rico.

• 1:02:12Speaker 04

  He's trying to protect our parks.

• 1:02:13Joe Rogan?

  He's just, he's a retard, he's just a retard.

• 1:02:16Speaker 03

  He's a male Greta Thunberg.

• 1:02:18Joe Rogan?

  People don't know the whole backstory to that joke. They know that's a joke about Puerto Rico you're doing on a fucking truck, bro.

• 1:02:23Speaker 04

  You should have defended him, you should have come out and just been like, he's retarded.

• 1:02:27Joe Rogan?

  That would be the right way to say it. I kinda did, I mean, I, I basically said that, like, this is, this is where it came from. Like, the Tony's just, he's a fucking insult comic, he's the best insult comic in the country. If you wanna watch that, that roast, watch that Tom Brady, Brady roast.

• 1:02:42Speaker 04

  It was so funny watching Jon Stewart go like, that's.

• 1:02:45Joe Rogan?

  Props to Stuart.

• 1:02:49Joe Rogan?

  Props to Stuart, he's a real comic. Stuart's like, he's a funny guy.

• 1:02:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, it was wild also that they saw that joke and everyone was angry within one minute. And it's like, no, nothing to like, let me analyze the arts. Let me just figure out what this is, but instantly like, I know what it is, I'm done with it. It's just demeaning to like, everything that's been-

• 1:03:06Joe Rogan?

  Exactly what we were talking about earlier, that does happen to people, where they can become someone else, but Stuart has not done that. He's still a comic. Still goes on stage with Chappelle. He still goes on stage with Chappelle, he still, he does podcasts, he's very reasonable when he does them. I think he also got disillusioned by that fucking Apple gig, where they cancelled his show because he wouldn't do, he was, wanted to do a thing on China. And they're like, no fucking way. And like, that was it.

• 1:03:31Speaker 03

  China.

• 1:03:32Joe Rogan?

  You can't talk shit about China. You can't even tell the truth. You can't say, if you're on an Apple show, and Apple has this insane manufacturing deal with China.

• 1:03:41Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:03:42Joe Rogan?

  All their phones.

• 1:03:43Speaker 02

  Slade labor.

• 1:03:44Joe Rogan?

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• 1:04:23Joe Rogan?

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• 1:05:02Joe Rogan?

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• 1:05:41Joe Rogan?

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• 1:06:13Speaker 03

  Think about that.

• 1:06:13Speaker 04

  I love slave labor.

• 1:06:14Joe Rogan?

  It's the craziest thing.

• 1:06:17Speaker 03

  What about the Uyghurs?

• 1:06:17Joe Rogan?

  Virtue signaling people.

• 1:06:19Speaker 03

  Like Schultz.

• 1:06:22Speaker 04

  Anytime the liberals get at you, just go, "You using an iPhone? Fuck off."

• 1:06:26Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, shut your mouth. Shut your mouth. Go get a Samsung if you really care.

• 1:06:30Speaker 03

  Yeah, didn't John Cena, he had to do a whole thing. Remember that?

• 1:06:33Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Oh, yeah. That was fast and furious.

• 1:06:36Speaker 04

  He nailed it.

• 1:06:36Speaker 02

  Nailed it. Got the language down.

• 1:06:39Joe Rogan?

  That's when I was.

• 1:06:39Speaker 02

  Shitting the streets before he did it.

• 1:06:40Joe Rogan?

  I had a bit about that for a while. I was like, that's when I knew that China was gonna win because they already got our mascot.

• 1:06:44Speaker 04

  They got our guy.

• 1:06:45Joe Rogan?

  He's the most American looking guy ever.

• 1:06:47Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 1:06:47Speaker 04

  Cena fucking rules.

• 1:06:48Speaker 03

  Weird jaw.

• 1:06:50Joe Rogan?

  His wrists are so big, it looks like his forearm is cut off here. He looks fake.

• 1:06:54Speaker 04

  It's crazy.

• 1:06:54Joe Rogan?

  It looks like his arm should be way longer, but they moved his hand up his forearm. Like, he's got no wrist.

• 1:06:59Speaker 04

  It does look like that.

• 1:07:00Joe Rogan?

  They're hams.

• 1:07:02Speaker 04

  Bro, that's the downtown of communities, bro.

• 1:07:05Speaker 02

  He is the number one downtown.

• 1:07:06Speaker 04

  John Cena, bro, hitting a fucking salute, running in in jean shorts, fucking people up.

• 1:07:12Speaker 03

  He's Mr. Make-A-Wish.

• 1:07:15Speaker 04

  He is.

• 1:07:16Joe Rogan?

  That's, I'll bet, man. I bet.

• 1:07:18Speaker 03

  Xena.

• 1:07:19Speaker 02

  I didn't like with Tony with all the comics, Wayne, and that really was the bug in the most.

• 1:07:24Joe Rogan?

  You're always gonna have that from weak people that aren't happy with where they are. That's what it is.

• 1:07:27Speaker 04

  Also, people were waiting to jump on Tony.

• 1:07:29Speaker 02

  That's it. That's it. Like, well, now that he can't fight back, I'll jump in there.

• 1:07:33Joe Rogan?

  Right, exactly.

• 1:07:34Speaker 02

  They never shit on some low-level guy.

• 1:07:35Joe Rogan?

  He's doing great, and you can not like him if he's doing great.

• 1:07:38Speaker 04

  Low-level guys. If I go to an open mic and be like, this racist piece of shit.

• 1:07:42Joe Rogan?

  You're allowed to not like him if he's doing great, but if you're attacking him, like, you don't know what he was doing. You don't know what he was doing? He was just doing what he always does. He's an insult comic. Are you saying you don't like insult comedy? So you don't like roasts?

• 1:07:54Speaker 02

  So you said that two months ago. Why are you saying it right now?

• 1:07:57Joe Rogan?

  Listen, man, roasts are one of the things that's gonna save comedy, because they're so funny that it's undeniable to Netflix. So Netflix gets the highest ratings they've ever had, ever, on this Tom Brady roast. It's completely non-PC. It's some of the wildest jokes. Tony calls him a Confederate fag. Like, it's some of the wild, and it's killing, and it's so funny, and people love it, and they keep sharing it. And people keep sending it to their friends, and clips are made out of it. It's huge for Netflix. Without that, you don't get the freedom to do whatever the fuck you want on stage.

• 1:08:28Speaker 04

  I make fun of Tony a lot, but that was, that was like a nice moment. Well, I was sitting there.

• 1:08:32Joe Rogan?

  Gangster!

• 1:08:32Speaker 04

  When he did the roast.

• 1:08:34Joe Rogan?

  He killed it.

• 1:08:35Speaker 04

  And I gave him a joke right before, and this is how, like, in the pocket he was, because he, like, stood up from the table and was like, hello. And just started. I felt, I was like, genuinely happy. I was like, watching him fucking kill. And then the joke I gave him, he, I gave it to him right before he went on. I don't wanna say.

• 1:08:52Speaker 03

  All right, Puerto Rico?

• 1:08:53Speaker 04

  It was an insult personally at one of the comedians. I was like, tell that motherfucker.

• 1:08:58Speaker 03

  Oh, shit.

• 1:09:00Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:09:01Speaker 03

  Oh, wow.

• 1:09:02Speaker 02

  I pretty much know already then.

• 1:09:04Joe Rogan?

  Okay, I know too.

• 1:09:05Speaker 03

  Nick Glaze the whore, was it?

• 1:09:07Speaker 04

  No, no, no.

• 1:09:07Joe Rogan?

  Fuck up, Mark.

• 1:09:08Speaker 04

  No, I wouldn't be trash, Nicky. I love Nicky.

• 1:09:10Speaker 03

  I like Nicky too.

• 1:09:11Speaker 04

  But, no, I actually do. I do.

• 1:09:13Speaker 03

  I do too.

• 1:09:13Speaker 04

  But.

• 1:09:14Speaker 03

  I love Nicky.

• 1:09:14Speaker 04

  Right before he tells the joke, he looks, he literally looked over at me and was like.

• 1:09:18Speaker 03

  Ahhh.

• 1:09:19Speaker 02

  He did a little gay. You motherfucker. I was like, yes, dude.

• 1:09:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:25Speaker 03

  And he'd come up in the audience like that, that ain't easy to walk up like that.

• 1:09:28Joe Rogan?

  Well, you know, they wanted him to do his set seated and he was like, this is stupid.

• 1:09:31Speaker 03

  Seated?

• 1:09:32Speaker 02

  Cause they didn't respect him. Any store guy like, no, you're not one of the cool kids. So it's like, dude, fuck off. Just let the guy shine.

• 1:09:39Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's a lot of resistance to him with the powers that be. Like a hungry wolf. A lot of resistance to that Hinchcliffe fellow. So much butts in here, fuck.

• 1:09:47Speaker 03

  Well, just say you're mad he's at a Trump rally. That, alright, that I get. But why are you gonna use the joke as a vehicle to get angry?

• 1:09:54Joe Rogan?

  Cause it's both, it's both things. The joke is nothing, but the fact that if the joke just released on YouTube, eh, people would get mad. Maybe the Kamala Harris camp would use it to show that this guy's a Trump supporter, but it's not connected to Trump. The fact that it's at the Trump rally, which is so crazy that he did it there.

• 1:10:11Speaker 02

  They should have never.

• 1:10:12Joe Rogan?

  Nobody checked his set!

• 1:10:13Speaker 02

  But they're also waiting. It's like Alexandria Ocasio-Cortezio sitting there like fucking.

• 1:10:17Speaker 03

  What? Who?

• 1:10:18Speaker 02

  Alexandria Ocasio-Cortezio?

• 1:10:20Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:21Speaker 02

  You have been doing that Duolingo shit. She's sitting there waiting like, what can I be angry about? And she's like, that's one. And it's like, that's not the target market.

• 1:10:27Joe Rogan?

  They're trying to win, man. You're looking at it like they should be reasonable. Why would they be reasonable when they're trying to win? They wanna exploit every last possible thing and Tony gave him a bunch of rope.

• 1:10:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:10:38Joe Rogan?

  And they hung him.

• 1:10:39Speaker 02

  Well, they, they were already calling it a fucking Nazi rally.

• 1:10:41Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 1:10:42Speaker 02

  And then you have a comedian go up there that probably a lot of them had no idea who he was.

• 1:10:46Speaker 03

  Sure.

• 1:10:47Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:10:47Speaker 02

  Even like the people talking about it. And then he's, I mean, the fucking watermelon carving joke, that was the one that should have been fucking.

• 1:10:53Joe Rogan?

  That was so stupid and interesting.

• 1:10:55Speaker 03

  That was an improv.

• 1:10:56Speaker 02

  I know. You could tell.

• 1:10:57Speaker 03

  That dumbass.

• 1:10:58Speaker 02

  He fucking did it.

• 1:10:59Speaker 03

  Oh, that was a dumbass.

• 1:11:00Speaker 02

  I thought it was funny.

• 1:11:01Speaker 03

  I gave him that one.

• 1:11:01Speaker 02

  I thought it was funny. I don't know. Well, yeah, at a comedy club, not at a Nazi rally.

• 1:11:06Joe Rogan?

  At a fucking roast battle.

• 1:11:07Speaker 02

  I liked it at a comedy club.

• 1:11:08Joe Rogan?

  He'd be great at a roast battle.

• 1:11:10Speaker 02

  Yeah, once they made it a Nazi rally, then it's like, well, then nothing is gonna work here to you guys. It's a full German Nazi rally.

• 1:11:17Joe Rogan?

  Israeli flags at a Nazi rally. I saw like four Israeli flags hanging from the rafters. Yeah, there was Israeli flags that people brought. The whole idea that that was a Nazi rally is crazy. They, no one believes it. It man, that's why they're not talking about it now.

• 1:11:30Speaker 04

  I have to flag that one.

• 1:11:31Speaker 03

  Pull that one out. But yes, there's a guy named Vivek.

• 1:11:35Speaker 02

  I like, I like when the comics do like when they'll try to defend somebody, but they're so scared of the backlash. They go, look, I didn't like that joke, but it's his right to say it. It's like, who comments on that you don't like jokes?

• 1:11:45Joe Rogan?

  How about when Patton took a picture with Chappelle and he had to take a photo of him writing an apology on a piece of paper?

• 1:11:51Speaker 04

  That was weak. He, I think he felt really bad about that.

• 1:11:53Speaker 03

  He did. That was the height of all the shit.

• 1:11:55Speaker 04

  He felt bad about that.

• 1:11:56Speaker 02

  Wait a week, let the press pressure go away, then if you have to weigh in.

• 1:12:00Speaker 03

  Well, the internet coming at you is scary. People panic, Dave.

• 1:12:03Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, don't read it.

• 1:12:04Speaker 02

  Tony handled it really well.

• 1:12:05Speaker 04

  So hard not to read it.

• 1:12:05Speaker 02

  He goes, take a joke, fuck off, and then just not another word about it.

• 1:12:09Joe Rogan?

  I, I had to read the thing about The View because I just thought it was funny.

• 1:12:12Speaker 02

  What's The View?

• 1:12:13Joe Rogan?

  I read that about me.

• 1:12:14Speaker 03

  Dragon lover.

• 1:12:14Joe Rogan?

  It said the radio. Joy Behar was trying to say that I believe in dragons.

• 1:12:18Speaker 02

  Wait, what is this?

• 1:12:19Joe Rogan?

  I just heard about it. I checked it. I checked it. And then the lady goes, did she double check this? She goes, I checked it. He believes in dragons.

• 1:12:25Speaker 04

  Should be like Sasquatch, bitch.

• 1:12:26Joe Rogan?

  Alongside people.

• 1:12:27Speaker 02

  Wait.

• 1:12:28Joe Rogan?

  It was from a wildlife biologist who came on my podcast. It was Forrest Galant. Galante? Galant. How do I say his last name? Great guy. I love him. He's awesome. But he was saying, there are, there are.

• 1:12:39Speaker 04

  Fucking off.

• 1:12:40Speaker 03

  JMo, let's do it.

• 1:12:41Speaker 02

  Jamie, you haven't called anything up.

• 1:12:43Joe Rogan?

  Forrest's clip where he's explaining dragons.

• 1:12:45Speaker 02

  Now that Jamie looks like a Mexican, he's lazy.

• 1:12:47Joe Rogan?

  This is where it came from. And The View decided from this and from me talking about it with Adrian Appalucci the other day. Explaining what Forrest says and saying that I don't think that there was pterodactyls living with people. I said it. No. She said, maybe they did live with us. I'm like, no. I thought, my position is it's probably crocodiles or some big Komodo dragon or some big lizard that did kill people. And so people fought them with swords and shit and they came back with a story and then the artist drew it. And these things.

• 1:13:15Speaker 04

  If you saw one of those at night and you had a stick, yeah, it'd be like, I saw a pterodactyl. I thought of a picture of Joe Rogan and a unicorn.

• 1:13:21Joe Rogan?

  All throughout these same time periods, there's been giant lizards. All throughout the same time, time periods have been Komodo dragons, have been crocodiles, been here for fucking hundred million years or whatever they've been for. Probably been more. So the idea that, that people didn't encounter giant reptiles is stupid. And then there's the other thing is like people were really bad at describing things that they'd never seen before. So if you're a European traveler and you go to the Nile River and you see a fucking crocodile, like, what is that?

• 1:13:48Speaker 04

  Take a guy.

• 1:13:49Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, what is that?

• 1:13:50Speaker 04

  What the fuck?

• 1:13:51Speaker 03

  Or a baby in Florida.

• 1:13:52Joe Rogan?

  So let's.

• 1:13:54Speaker 05

  Can hold any weight?

• 1:13:54Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:13:55Speaker 05

  Like, there was actually dragons?

• 1:13:56Speaker 03

  I, I, I mean, we know there were large flying lizards during the times of dinosaurs, right? The only weight that it could possibly hold is that like a few of those somehow survived much later than we previously thought.

• 1:14:06Speaker 02

  Jesus.

• 1:14:07Speaker 03

  But I, do I think that there were dragons attacking human beings and civilizations? No, I don't.

• 1:14:11Speaker 02

  JD Vance looks terrible.

• 1:14:12Joe Rogan?

  It's so much cooler if there were. The fact that we know that pterodactyls did exist, that's cool.

• 1:14:18Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:14:18Joe Rogan?

  It would be way cooler if they existed with people.

• 1:14:20Speaker 03

  Right, 2,000 years ago.

• 1:14:22Joe Rogan?

  Why is that? Why is that so much cooler to us?

• 1:14:24Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 1:14:25Joe Rogan?

  It's like, I would be, I would, I mean, people would dedicate giant chunks of their life trying to find out if pterodactyls did coexist with human beings.

• 1:14:34Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:14:34Speaker 02

  I swear, I thought, I thought you had pterodactyls on your shirt there, and I was like, yeah, this is the most autistic thing I've ever seen.

• 1:14:40Joe Rogan?

  That's hilarious, and so I think that's a rhino.

• 1:14:41Speaker 02

  Why can't pterodactyls be real? The problem is you're taking Joey, Joey Behar, whatever her name is, as like a, as a news source.

• 1:14:49Joe Rogan?

  Did you have a stroke? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, this is the most important part.

• 1:14:52Speaker 02

  I don't know, I don't watch a few.

• 1:14:53Joe Rogan?

  Hey, this is the most important part. This is right after she was saying, "We are run by ABC News, you should trust us, not Joe Rogan, who believes in dragons." So she, she, by saying we should trust them because they're double-checked by ABC News, and then making the stupidest fucking statement. Like, you're, you're, you didn't listen to what I said.

• 1:15:17Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:15:17Joe Rogan?

  You didn't listen to what the wildlife bout, and that's only a part of what he said.

• 1:15:20Speaker 02

  I can't believe Joey Behar in way.

• 1:15:22Joe Rogan?

  The other part of what he said was, there was something before that where he was explaining encounters with giant reptiles.

• 1:15:27Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 1:15:27Joe Rogan?

  And there's also, listen.

• 1:15:28Speaker 02

  It doesn't make sense to me that a middle-aged woman could be dumb.

• 1:15:31Joe Rogan?

  When you're worried about losing your job, and you're worried about podcasts taking over, and who's the source of news, and we said Donald Trump is Hitler, but half the country disagreed with us, and he won, and this is fucking crazy, and Joe Rogan believes in dragons! It's, it's just frantic, it's foolish.

• 1:15:46Speaker 02

  Bro, if you believe that Donald Trump is Hitler, and everyone who supports him is a massive racist, and if you are any ethnic or gay, you need to get the fuck out of this country. Because if you believe all that, it's bad for you here.

• 1:16:00Speaker 03

  But Sunny Hostin, she makes some good points.

• 1:16:02Speaker 02

  Who's that?

• 1:16:03Speaker 03

  She's the other one.

• 1:16:04Speaker 04

  That's not gonna clip well.

• 1:16:05Speaker 02

  I'm just telling like, like if they really believe this, what are you still doing here?

• 1:16:09Joe Rogan?

  Jamie, there's a photo that I have on my Instagram.

• 1:16:12Speaker 03

  You gotta start drinking, Ari.

• 1:16:13Speaker 02

  I'm drinking.

• 1:16:14Joe Rogan?

  Jamie, there's a photo I have on my Instagram of a whale that's on a wall in an old Italian church. It was from like 2017 or 2018. I was in Ravello. And there's this church that's, it's so old, the church is a thousand years old, but it's built on top of another church. They don't even know how old that church is. There's like a glass floor and you look down, you see the old church. They don't, they have no idea how old it is. But they had a painting of like the whale from the, from the Bible. Who was it? Job? Who was it?

• 1:16:41Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:16:42Speaker 04

  David Lucas.

• 1:16:42Speaker 02

  Jonah, Jonah, Jonah.

• 1:16:43Joe Rogan?

  That's right, Jonah. So look at this photo, this is this ancient, ancient church, but there's a photo of a whale that's in, is it in that?

• 1:16:51Speaker 03

  Where's Ravello?

• 1:16:52Joe Rogan?

  It's around the same time. I know I put the photo on Instagram.

• 1:16:55Speaker 03

  Oh, Italy.

• 1:16:56Joe Rogan?

  That's the church. But in that church, there's, the whale doesn't look nothing like a whale. The whale looks like a monster.

• 1:17:02Speaker 02

  Jero, Belize and Dragons.

• 1:17:04Joe Rogan?

  So that's what it's like.

• 1:17:05Speaker 02

  Here we go.

• 1:17:05Joe Rogan?

  Their drawings was like, they came back and described, those fucking mercenaries couldn't draw. So the guys who came back, the savages, the fucking animals that were hacking off heads from the Congo. They don't, they're not drawing.

• 1:17:18Speaker 02

  I've been real busy pillaging. I can't work on my art.

• 1:17:20Joe Rogan?

  And then the artist draws it and they could probably barely remember, cause it's probably so traumatic.

• 1:17:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:17:26Joe Rogan?

  A 16 foot crocodile comes launching out of the river and takes one of your boys and eats them in front of everybody. It's like, wah! That's it.

• 1:17:34Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's pretty good.

• 1:17:35Joe Rogan?

  So that's what they thought a whale looked like.

• 1:17:36Speaker 03

  A whale?

• 1:17:37Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 1:17:37Speaker 02

  That's a, that's a crocodile.

• 1:17:38Speaker 03

  That's a trans.

• 1:17:39Joe Rogan?

  So but look at it. That is the story from the Bible.

• 1:17:42Speaker 02

  Dude, that's badass.

• 1:17:42Joe Rogan?

  They had never seen a whale before, so they drew this thing.

• 1:17:45Speaker 04

  Look how, look how bad they got the guy.

• 1:17:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:17:48Speaker 04

  I mean, they knew what guys looked like and they were struggling.

• 1:17:50Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, they weren't good artists.

• 1:17:51Speaker 02

  It looks like an alien monkey.

• 1:17:52Joe Rogan?

  They're doing it in tile, in all defense. It's a very difficult medium to work with.

• 1:17:56Speaker 02

  What's a higher primary thing?

• 1:17:57Speaker 04

  What is this?

• 1:17:58Speaker 03

  Look at that guy.

• 1:17:59Joe Rogan?

  Isn't that wild though? So that is what.

• 1:18:01Speaker 04

  Peace, I'm bugging out of here.

• 1:18:02Speaker 02

  Be cool, bro.

• 1:18:04Joe Rogan?

  So their version of things that we know that what looked like were all fucked up already.

• 1:18:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:18:09Joe Rogan?

  So that's probably what dragons are. What dragons are probably giant crocodiles.

• 1:18:13Speaker 03

  There you go.

• 1:18:14Joe Rogan?

  And there's some people that went to the Congo in the eighteen hundreds that said they saw crocodiles bigger than their boats. Forty foot boats and crocodiles were bigger than their boats. The thing about crocodiles is they don't a- they don't die.

• 1:18:25Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:18:26Joe Rogan?

  They just stay alive until something kills them. So they keep growing. So if you got a crocodile, it could be three hundred, four hundred years old. And that would be like a sixty foot crocodile.

• 1:18:35Speaker 02

  Really?

• 1:18:35Joe Rogan?

  They might have seen those back then.

• 1:18:37Speaker 02

  They get that old?

• 1:18:37Joe Rogan?

  And that's when people had guns, right? So the people with the guns are probably killing all the ones that are really big.

• 1:18:44Speaker 02

  Fuck yeah.

• 1:18:45Joe Rogan?

  So those ones that are really big, they've been eating other crocodiles, they've eaten everything, cannibalize each other, they eat everything that moves. So to get to that point is so hard that when you whack those dudes, the ones that are left are like thirty years old, fifty years old. Like you'll probably have smaller crocodiles. It kinda makes sense. That's probably what dragons were. Probably were a bunch of people that never experienced crocodiles before and just got fucked up by these twenty foot crocs.

• 1:19:10Speaker 03

  Imagine seeing that and not knowing what it is, dude.

• 1:19:13Speaker 02

  What does Joey Behar say?

• 1:19:15Joe Rogan?

  Joey?

• 1:19:15Speaker 02

  Whatever.

• 1:19:16Joe Rogan?

  Joey Behar?

• 1:19:17Speaker 02

  When she's, when people tell like, hey, so that's, that's not true.

• 1:19:21Joe Rogan?

  I just wanna say for the record, I have no hate for Joey Behar. If I saw her, I'd give her a hug. I don't care. I'd probably say the same thing about me if I was her. It's no big deal. I don't care. But it's a silly thing to say and it undermines your own personal credibility.

• 1:19:33Speaker 02

  Credibility, yeah.

• 1:19:33Joe Rogan?

  If you say we're so good because we're, we're supported by ABC News and then you say Joe Rogan believes in dragons in the next sentence.

• 1:19:39Speaker 02

  And no chance she comes back, goes, oh, guys, I was wrong. Somebody told me the wrong shit.

• 1:19:42Speaker 04

  If it was a joke, that would be funny. I know she wasn't joking, but it would be hilarious. Joe Rogan, the guy who fucking believes in dragons?

• 1:19:48Joe Rogan?

  I wonder if there were some kind of flying lizards at one point in human history. You know, if you go, well, this is what the Bigfoot myth is about. The Bigfoot myth is about a thing that really existed. It's called Gigantopithecus. But it lived like a hundred thousand years ago. So by the time, at least we think it, we know for sure, no later, I mean, later than that for sure, a hundred thousand years. We don't know earlier. It might have been earlier. It might have lived fifty thousand years ago. We just don't have an example of it. But that was a thing that was passed on in stories. It's dead now. It doesn't exist anymore. But people were telling a story about a thing that was real. That's probably what dragons are. It's probably people telling a story about a thing that was real. And if a hundred, two hundred thousand years ago, there were some reptiles that could fly.

• 1:20:31Joe Rogan?

  We know that pterodactyls were fucking real. If they just find one of those things, it would change everything. And you gotta realize, they've only been finding dinosaurs for 200 years.

• 1:20:39Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 1:20:40Joe Rogan?

  200 years ago, they didn't know what the fuck-

• 1:20:41Speaker 04

  That's when the Jews started burying those bones.

• 1:20:45Joe Rogan?

  Well, there was a bunch of dudes who had fake dinosaur bones.

• 1:20:47Speaker 04

  You're trying to trick us.

• 1:20:48Speaker 02

  Don't attack us, it's been nice weather today.

• 1:20:50Joe Rogan?

  You know, there was a bunch of dudes who put like, other bones and claimed they were dinosaur bones. There was a bunch of frauds that were dinosaur-

• 1:20:55Speaker 04

  Well, those were the actual Jewish dudes.

• 1:20:58Speaker 04

  I heard there's money in bones.

• 1:20:59Joe Rogan?

  Jamie, when did they, when did they discover dinosaurs?

• 1:21:02Speaker 03

  Ari, you look like a pterodactyl.

• 1:21:04Joe Rogan?

  Imagine discovering dinosaurs, going, "Oh, is this thing around?"

• 1:21:08Speaker 03

  I think most of them at the White House.

• 1:21:11Speaker 03

  Pelosi, get out.

• 1:21:14Joe Rogan?

  She just filed for reelection.

• 1:21:15Speaker 03

  Ah, she's like 79.

• 1:21:17Joe Rogan?

  She's 84.

• 1:21:18Speaker 03

  84 with those tits.

• 1:21:19Joe Rogan?

  She just fired for, yeah.

• 1:21:21Speaker 03

  Pretty huge. Cans.

• 1:21:22Joe Rogan?

  When did they, 1824. Okay, so exactly, exactly 200 years ago, they found the first dinosaur.

• 1:21:28Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 1:21:28Joe Rogan?

  So that was only known about dinosaurs for 200 years.

• 1:21:31Speaker 04

  Wow, what?

• 1:21:32Joe Rogan?

  And there's a giant chunk of the planet that has not been discovered. Like, we, we had a podcast the other day, they've only like, looked at 5% of Sub-Saharan Africa. They find whale bones in the Sahara Desert out there. Whale bones, in the desert. Who knows what the fuck's out there? It's not impossible to imagine that, since there used to be flying lizards, that at one point in time there were. 1677, someone discovered it? 1677, someone created with discovering the first dinosaur bone, but his best guess as to what belonged to was a giant human. Oh, wow.

• 1:22:04Speaker 04

  Wow. So funny, so funny to find like a giant femur and be like, "God damn, that guy was huge."

• 1:22:09Joe Rogan?

  That's my favorite conspiracy.

• 1:22:11Speaker 04

  Giants?

• 1:22:12Joe Rogan?

  That giants used to roam the earth. And that, you know, they were created by the Anunnaki breeding with people.

• 1:22:17Speaker 04

  I believe it. I'm down.

• 1:22:19Joe Rogan?

  And that the government, the Smithsonian, has been hiding giant bones.

• 1:22:22Speaker 03

  You know, they made Yao Ming. They got the two tallest people in China to fuck.

• 1:22:26Speaker 04

  No.

• 1:22:26Joe Rogan?

  That's a good move.

• 1:22:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, it worked.

• 1:22:27Joe Rogan?

  But that's a good move.

• 1:22:29Speaker 03

  Yao Zing.

• 1:22:29Joe Rogan?

  I mean, how many fucking Division One football players are out there because their parents said, "Listen, you're a big lady." I'm the big guy. I think we can make some kids can make us some fucking money. Let's go.

• 1:22:39Speaker 02

  Careful.

• 1:22:41Joe Rogan?

  If you're really into football and you're a big fella and you see this big lady at the bar with some nice hands. Look at those hands.

• 1:22:47Speaker 02

  I need hands.

• 1:22:48Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I need a lady with a grip.

• 1:22:52Joe Rogan?

  If you have a lady and she's tall, but she's got some dainty hands, you could have a brittle kid. You don't want a brittle boy.

• 1:22:57Speaker 02

  I believe in Giants. I saw a fucking, I went to an NBA game and I met Zach Eadie.

• 1:23:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:23:04Speaker 02

  JMo, bring up Zach Eadie.

• 1:23:05Speaker 03

  Eadie.

• 1:23:06Speaker 02

  If you saw that guy, if you lived back then, saw a guy like fucking Zach Eadie.

• 1:23:09Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:23:11Speaker 02

  Fuck, don't fuck with those guys.

• 1:23:13Speaker 03

  What's that guy, the mountain from Game of Thrones?

• 1:23:15Joe Rogan?

  Bro, how about Shaq?

• 1:23:15Speaker 02

  Shaq, just Shaq.

• 1:23:16Joe Rogan?

  Shaq is a legitimate giant.

• 1:23:18Speaker 02

  Shaq is.

• 1:23:18Joe Rogan?

  He's a seven foot human.

• 1:23:20Speaker 02

  He used to come into the store and it was like, he's only 10 inches taller than me, but he's.

• 1:23:24Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 1:23:27Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:23:27Speaker 03

  What is he Siberian or something?

• 1:23:29Speaker 02

  He looks like Mongol.

• 1:23:31Speaker 03

  Oh, okay. He looks a little funky.

• 1:23:34Joe Rogan?

  Oh, this is in Yalman. Who's this guy?

• 1:23:36Speaker 02

  Zach Eadie.

• 1:23:36Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 1:23:37Speaker 02

  He plays for the Sixers?

• 1:23:38Joe Rogan?

  What is his nationality?

• 1:23:41Speaker 02

  Uh, he looks a little Chi-Chinese.

• 1:23:43Speaker 04

  Nationality, I believe he's an American bro.

• 1:23:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, but.

• 1:23:46Joe Rogan?

  Right, but what is his, uh, family's background?

• 1:23:48Speaker 04

  Oh, no, my, it's Toronto, eh?

• 1:23:49Speaker 03

  Oh, he's a Canadian.

• 1:23:52Speaker 02

  Nice pick.

• 1:23:52Speaker 03

  Seven, four.

• 1:23:54Joe Rogan?

  Right, Jesus Christ.

• 1:23:55Speaker 04

  I took a picture with him after the game.

• 1:23:56Joe Rogan?

  What is his nationality?

• 1:23:57Speaker 04

  I looked like a.

• 1:23:59Joe Rogan?

  Other than Canadian.

• 1:24:00Speaker 04

  Fat lesbian.

• 1:24:00Joe Rogan?

  What does his family come from? Chinese immigrants in Toronto. Should play for the WNBA.

• 1:24:05Speaker 04

  If I was.

• 1:24:06Speaker 02

  He played ice hockey and baseball.

• 1:24:09Joe Rogan?

  That's a good athlete. Especially ice hockey.

• 1:24:15Joe Rogan?

  Ice hockey would be tremendous for any sport, right? That's a hard ass sport on your legs.

• 1:24:18Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:24:19Speaker 02

  Well, the best players only play like 20 minutes a game. They play like a third of the game.

• 1:24:24Joe Rogan?

  It's that hard.

• 1:24:24Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:24:25Speaker 04

  Yeah, but it's, uh, they play so many games.

• 1:24:26Speaker 02

  It's nonstop.

• 1:24:27Speaker 04

  Every fucking other day.

• 1:24:28Speaker 02

  Yeah, well, yeah.

• 1:24:29Speaker 04

  You just can't, you can't play a long shift.

• 1:24:31Joe Rogan?

  I think the hardest, I think the hardest is soccer. Those motherfuckers, there's no, there's no commercial breaks. They're sprinting the whole time.

• 1:24:38Speaker 04

  There are some breaks. Every single time a guy gets touched, they all lay down.

• 1:24:41Joe Rogan?

  But that's what you need to do.

• 1:24:42Speaker 04

  Well, that is on purpose. Everybody in America is like, oh, fucking pussies, get up. It's like, bro, they're so tired.

• 1:24:47Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's true.

• 1:24:48Speaker 04

  They're all like, yes.

• 1:24:50Speaker 02

  Rugby's, rugby might be it. Rugby might be it. They don't stop. They don't stop.

• 1:24:55Joe Rogan?

  They don't stop and there're no pads.

• 1:24:57Speaker 04

  It's American football.

• 1:24:58Speaker 02

  Rugby?

• 1:24:59Speaker 04

  No, American football is the, the, the reason it's a three second play is because they would die.

• 1:25:03Speaker 02

  They're so tired.

• 1:25:04Joe Rogan?

  Such a full sprint.

• 1:25:06Speaker 04

  It's crazy.

• 1:25:06Joe Rogan?

  Crazy amount, full power.

• 1:25:08Speaker 04

  Those are giants.

• 1:25:09Joe Rogan?

  Giants.

• 1:25:09Speaker 02

  But the cardio, the non-cardio, in terms of that, they might be soccer or rugby or, or Aussie football.

• 1:25:14Speaker 04

  Yeah, but alright, then cross country is the craziest.

• 1:25:16Joe Rogan?

  When we went to Dallas, we were at the, uh, the, uh, Cowboys versus the Jets. Went to see, this was the first, uh, NFL game I've ever been to. And we were like, not far away from the players, and you see how enormous they are. You look, you look at 350 pound humans just walking.

• 1:25:30Speaker 02

  Running.

• 1:25:30Joe Rogan?

  Walking with mortals.

• 1:25:31Speaker 04

  Faster than us.

• 1:25:32Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:25:33Speaker 03

  Yeah, they're huge.

• 1:25:33Speaker 04

  They're so fast.

• 1:25:34Joe Rogan?

  Who was that one guy that was almost 300 pounds and he ran a, a four second, four second plus 40?

• 1:25:40Speaker 03

  Aaron Hernandez.

• 1:25:41Speaker 04

  I mean, there's a now, now, uh...

• 1:25:45Speaker 03

  You're just swinging at anything.

• 1:25:46Speaker 04

  Hernandez.

• 1:25:47Speaker 03

  You're just swinging at everything. It's a comedy show.

• 1:25:49Speaker 04

  Uh, it's an island of garbage.

• 1:25:51Speaker 03

  Yeah. You know, you know what, uh, they thought mermaids, those were manatees.

• 1:25:55Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:56Speaker 03

  That's how horny they were.

• 1:25:57Speaker 02

  That's how drunk and horny they were.

• 1:25:58Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:25:58Speaker 04

  I know, I've, I've heard that rumor. I don't believe it.

• 1:26:00Joe Rogan?

  It's a dark, they got shitty vision, they've been poked in the eye since they were two.

• 1:26:04Speaker 03

  And drinking rum all day.

• 1:26:05Joe Rogan?

  Guys been poking them, guys poke them every time they get in an argument. They just poke two in the eye. Nobody could probably see at all. There's no glasses. You just went blind. You're eating terrible food.

• 1:26:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, scurvy.

• 1:26:15Joe Rogan?

  They were blind by the time they were 20. They thought a manatee was a woman.

• 1:26:18Speaker 04

  I don't believe it. You don't believe it.

• 1:26:19Joe Rogan?

  A nice, a nice plump woman, like them really rich ladies that eat the grapes.

• 1:26:22Speaker 04

  Thick top.

• 1:26:23Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, the ones, the, what do they call those?

• 1:26:25Speaker 04

  Fat chicks?

• 1:26:26Joe Rogan?

  Ruben-esque?

• 1:26:27Speaker 04

  Lizzos.

• 1:26:27Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:26:28Speaker 02

  Lizzos.

• 1:26:28Joe Rogan?

  That was hot back then because nobody could get fat because everybody was starving to death.

• 1:26:31Speaker 03

  That's true. That's true. It meant you had money.

• 1:26:33Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you were hot.

• 1:26:34Speaker 03

  And now fat people are poor.

• 1:26:35Joe Rogan?

  Right, so back then that was a hot fat lady.

• 1:26:37Speaker 03

  We flipped it.

• 1:26:38Joe Rogan?

  A hot fat lady floating around.

• 1:26:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:26:41Joe Rogan?

  We did flip it. We did flip it. It's super easy to get fat now.

• 1:26:45Speaker 03

  Jennifer Aniston's rail thin and Gwyneth Paltrow, they're all billionaires.

• 1:26:48Speaker 02

  Yeah, cheeseburgers are 39 cents on Wednesdays.

• 1:26:50Speaker 03

  Exactamundo.

• 1:26:54Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, even like Oprah keeps trying to lose weight.

• 1:26:56Speaker 02

  She's always been, huh?

• 1:26:58Joe Rogan?

  Always.

• 1:26:58Speaker 02

  She's like, she's like comes in. The best was Sherri Shepherd coming out. Did you ever see that one on The View?

• 1:27:03Joe Rogan?

  Sherri Shepherd came out for what?

• 1:27:05Speaker 02

  She lost, she lost all this weight.

• 1:27:06Joe Rogan?

  Ozempic?

• 1:27:06Speaker 02

  Came out in that orange like bathing suit and they're like, "We did it, I lost all this weight." They wheeled out a cart of ribs.

• 1:27:13Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:27:14Speaker 02

  For her to celebrate. She's in a bathing suit, eating ribs, getting fat again. Jamie.

• 1:27:20Speaker 03

  Sherri Shepherd's bi.

• 1:27:21Joe Rogan?

  Why would they do that to her? That's such a hater move.

• 1:27:23Speaker 02

  It's really funny. It'd be like, "Hey, I'm done with alcohol."

• 1:27:26Joe Rogan?

  Let's go.

• 1:27:27Speaker 03

  Here you go, Phil.

• 1:27:28Joe Rogan?

  One year sober, let's celebrate.

• 1:27:30Speaker 03

  Damn. Yeah, that Ozempic's taking over.

• 1:27:33Joe Rogan?

  But that's crazy that they did that to her.

• 1:27:35Speaker 02

  Yeah, they're like, "You did it, celebrate now."

• 1:27:37Joe Rogan?

  Bro, you remember the time Oprah had that lady on, it's in Chimp Crazy? Oprah had that lady on who got her face bit off by the chimp?

• 1:27:42Speaker 02

  Stay there.

• 1:27:43Joe Rogan?

  And she showed her face on TV?

• 1:27:45Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:27:45Joe Rogan?

  She had, the lady was wearing a veil over her face like, "Let's see your face, come on." She pulls the veil away like, "What are you doing?"

• 1:27:52Speaker 03

  She should go Muslim.

• 1:27:53Speaker 02

  May as well go Muslim at that point.

• 1:27:55Speaker 04

  Trick a man.

• 1:27:57Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:27:57Speaker 04

  Can you imagine being a good Muslim man? You go, "This lady seems cool as shit."

• 1:28:01Joe Rogan?

  Well, she doesn't have any eyes.

• 1:28:04Speaker 03

  It's like Jay Leno.

• 1:28:05Joe Rogan?

  She doesn't have any eyes. You can see it coming.

• 1:28:07Speaker 03

  Really?

• 1:28:07Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, her whole face is gone.

• 1:28:09Speaker 02

  She's like, "You sound like a man for me."

• 1:28:12Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, this is, that's crazy.

• 1:28:17Speaker 03

  Oh yeah, she looks good.

• 1:28:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:28:21Speaker 02

  Wait, that's Dr. Phil?

• 1:28:22Speaker 04

  No.

• 1:28:23Joe Rogan?

  Wow. Sherri's bathing suit body.

• 1:28:27Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 1:28:28Speaker 02

  Now you can eat. No, you can't. Now you keep not eating.

• 1:28:31Speaker 03

  Oprah fluctuates. She's like Elliot Page.

• 1:28:34Joe Rogan?

  When did they move people off that show? Sherri's not on that show anymore, right?

• 1:28:37Speaker 02

  I don't know. No, she's not. She started going back to clubs.

• 1:28:40Speaker 03

  Fifteen years ago.

• 1:28:41Speaker 02

  She was one of the real comics.

• 1:28:42Speaker 03

  There you go.

• 1:28:43Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I knew her as a comic way back in the day.

• 1:28:44Speaker 04

  I didn't know, who's Sherri?

• 1:28:46Joe Rogan?

  Sherri Shepherd.

• 1:28:47Speaker 02

  She's a store comic. And then she got on The View for like, I don't know, three to 20 years.

• 1:28:52Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:28:53Speaker 03

  Damn. That's a tough gig. Fuck that. I think The View is gonna get cancelled.

• 1:28:58Speaker 02

  Nah, it'll keep going forever.

• 1:28:58Speaker 04

  No, The View is fucking killing it right now. They're all spazzing out. It's hilarious.

• 1:29:02Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's true.

• 1:29:03Joe Rogan?

  Well, you're dealing with these two matriarchs, right? The older ladies.

• 1:29:06Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:29:06Joe Rogan?

  Kind of set the tone of the show. You know, that's part of the problem.

• 1:29:10Speaker 02

  Check them, Star Trek and the other one?

• 1:29:12Joe Rogan?

  They're out of touch.

• 1:29:13Speaker 03

  One of them's pretty hot.

• 1:29:14Joe Rogan?

  Whoopi Goldberg's, like, did you see what she did to that Staten Island bakery?

• 1:29:17Speaker 03

  Yeah!

• 1:29:18Joe Rogan?

  Crazy.

• 1:29:19Speaker 02

  What?

• 1:29:19Joe Rogan?

  She ate everything. So Staten Island Bakery, their boiler went down, and she placed an order of cupcakes for her birthday, and they couldn't do the order.

• 1:29:25Speaker 02

  Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. I can't imagine yet how this would go back. Okay, go ahead.

• 1:29:31Joe Rogan?

  So then she places this order. They say, "We can't, um, promise you that we can do this because our boiler is down, so we can't, we can't fulfill this order." And so then, the next day, the boiler is back up. She has someone else call the same bakery, and they get the order in, because now the boiler's up. She claims the reason why they didn't take her order is because they didn't like her politics.

• 1:29:53Speaker 02

  Ah.

• 1:29:54Joe Rogan?

  And so she says this on The View. So then, the bakery has a press conference. Where they say, "We've been in business for 150 years. This is not what happened at all. We don't discriminate against anybody regardless of anything. We just had a problem with our boiler, and she's signaling out a family-run business, and then there's a line around the block for the bakery."

• 1:30:12Speaker 02

  Nice.

• 1:30:13Joe Rogan?

  It's bananas. And then she doubles down. She made a video, and she didn't even apologize. In fact, she said the same thing.

• 1:30:21Speaker 02

  I like how they can't even see a possibility where it's just an innocuous idea.

• 1:30:25Speaker 04

  Her best was like, uh, wasn't it like the Holocaust? And she was like, "That's white people problems."

• 1:30:29Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:29Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah. That's crazy.

• 1:30:31Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, something like that.

• 1:30:32Joe Rogan?

  Well, she got kicked off the show for a couple days.

• 1:30:34Speaker 03

  That's right.

• 1:30:35Joe Rogan?

  Remember?

• 1:30:35Speaker 02

  They were like, Oprah, Oprah. Or whatever her name was.

• 1:30:37Joe Rogan?

  These people.

• 1:30:38Speaker 04

  Damn, I swear you had a fucking stroke.

• 1:30:40Speaker 02

  I might have sunk over.

• 1:30:40Speaker 04

  I told you you were sad. What's going on?

• 1:30:42Joe Rogan?

  These people are just too out of touch to be running that show.

• 1:30:46Speaker 03

  Bitch McConnell.

• 1:30:48Joe Rogan?

  Ah, isn't that guy in charge of something now? Didn't they just put Mitch McConnell in charge of something?

• 1:30:54Speaker 04

  He's probably.

• 1:30:54Speaker 03

  Really?

• 1:30:55Joe Rogan?

  They just did. He's fucking locking up like a Windows 95 computer.

• 1:31:00Speaker 03

  He's got the spinny wheel.

• 1:31:01Joe Rogan?

  He just locks up all the time and they just put this guy, what'd they just put Mitch McConnell in charge of, Jamie?

• 1:31:06Speaker 03

  Comedy Central?

• 1:31:07Joe Rogan?

  Something about appointments.

• 1:31:08Speaker 04

  Put on Futurama.

• 1:31:10Joe Rogan?

  All things comedy, he's gonna take over.

• 1:31:12Speaker 04

  Futurama.

• 1:31:13Joe Rogan?

  What is it?

• 1:31:14Speaker 03

  Defense spending, which. Oh, yeah.

• 1:31:17Joe Rogan?

  You run anything by that dude, he can't count anymore.

• 1:31:19Speaker 03

  Chairman of the Senate Appropriations Subcommittee on Defense and Chairman of the Senate Rules Committee.

• 1:31:24Speaker 04

  Get him up there, that's what we need.

• 1:31:25Joe Rogan?

  Yo, that guy locked up twice on TV.

• 1:31:28Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:31:28Joe Rogan?

  Fully locked up, like didn't know where he was, they had to grab his arm, take him off the stage. Yeah. You ever see him lock up?

• 1:31:34Speaker 03

  There he is. He's got the turkey neck.

• 1:31:36Joe Rogan?

  Jamie, pull up the video of Mitch McConnell locking up.

• 1:31:39Speaker 04

  He was like the face of evil for a while.

• 1:31:41Joe Rogan?

  Watch this video. He just stepped down. He's gonna step down.

• 1:31:46Speaker 03

  People thought that he was gonna step down, but he didn't. That's just an old clip. He can't step.

• 1:31:49Speaker 04

  Oh, he was old a billion years ago.

• 1:31:51Joe Rogan?

  Bro, but it's, the way he locks up is terrifying. It's like, it's almost like the guy's having a stroke. It's very strange.

• 1:31:58Speaker 03

  Maybe the women at The View are geniuses, cuz we're all talking about it, it's a ton of press.

• 1:32:02Speaker 04

  The views are.

• 1:32:02Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Yeah, give us this.

• 1:32:05Speaker 03

  Oh, this is great.

• 1:32:06Speaker 05

  This week, been good by bipartisan cooperation.

• 1:32:09Joe Rogan?

  Jesus.

• 1:32:09Speaker 03

  Oh, no.

• 1:32:10Joe Rogan?

  But hold on.

• 1:32:17Speaker 03

  It's like when a girl eats your ass you didn't know she was going to. You're like, oh shit.

• 1:32:21Speaker 04

  Wow, this is going great, oh.

• 1:32:24Joe Rogan?

  Bro, look at this guy's, he's waving back and forth, like he's ready to go.

• 1:32:28Speaker 04

  They're all looking like, what?

• 1:32:29Speaker 03

  Oh, he's melting.

• 1:32:30Speaker 04

  Look at the extras.

• 1:32:32Joe Rogan?

  Dude, this is a full lockup.

• 1:32:35Speaker 03

  Oh, man.

• 1:32:40Speaker 03

  Let's go back to your house.

• 1:32:43Speaker 04

  Yeah, I'm done.

• 1:32:44Speaker 03

  Oh, my god.

• 1:32:45Joe Rogan?

  So that guy just got a new job.

• 1:32:47Speaker 02

  So he's running shit?

• 1:32:48Speaker 04

  Is that Canada's top general, Megan Rapinoe?

• 1:32:51Speaker 02

  That's Emma Willman as the top general of the country.

• 1:32:54Joe Rogan?

  Bro, how bizarre is that? That that guy just got a new gig.

• 1:32:57Speaker 03

  That was Amma Levine.

• 1:32:58Speaker 02

  He's so done. Who's running shit?

• 1:33:01Speaker 03

  I thought you had it. Oh, there it is.

• 1:33:02Speaker 04

  Who's running shit?

• 1:33:03Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:33:04Joe Rogan?

  Who's running shit?

• 1:33:05Speaker 02

  Jews. That's what you're saying, Jews. But at least it should be young Jews.

• 1:33:09Speaker 03

  Own it, man. Your people are running shit.

• 1:33:11Speaker 02

  I love it, yeah, we run everything.

• 1:33:12Speaker 04

  Ancient Jews.

• 1:33:12Joe Rogan?

  Pelosi's an Italian.

• 1:33:13Speaker 04

  Timeless Jews. You guys are like crocodiles.

• 1:33:16Speaker 03

  She's Italian.

• 1:33:17Speaker 02

  Our noses go bigger and bigger into her, dad.

• 1:33:19Speaker 03

  Yeah, I think she, uh...

• 1:33:20Speaker 02

  Pelosi, that sounds...

• 1:33:21Joe Rogan?

  She's got them Italian yams.

• 1:33:22Speaker 03

  She's got a photo with, uh, JFK back in the day.

• 1:33:24Speaker 02

  She invests like a Jew.

• 1:33:25Joe Rogan?

  Back in the day. Yeah, she was like a kid.

• 1:33:28Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, she gave him some head.

• 1:33:29Speaker 04

  God damn it, I have to pee.

• 1:33:30Speaker 03

  Or some brain.

• 1:33:32Speaker 04

  I was trying so hard.

• 1:33:33Joe Rogan?

  Hang in there, buddy.

• 1:33:34Speaker 02

  Nice. That'll make me go soon.

• 1:33:37Joe Rogan?

  Easy, fellas.

• 1:33:39Joe Rogan?

  This episode is brought to you by Armra. Every week, there's some new wellness hack that people swear by, and after a while, you start thinking, "Why do we think we can just outsmart our bodies?" That's why Armra colostrum caught my attention. It's something the body already recognizes and has hundreds of these specialized nutrients for gut stuff, immunity, metabolism, et cetera. I first noticed it working around training, especially workout recovery. Most stuff falls off, but I am still taking this. If you want to try, Armra is offering my listeners 30% off. Go to armra.com/rogan. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Look, it's good to prepare for the future, but when you start overanalyzing what's happening

• 1:34:23Joe Rogan?

  around you, dreaming up every hypothetical situation of what could happen, that's when it gets dangerous. You can start to hyperfixate and stress out and all over things that haven't even happened. That's no good for current you or future you. If you're struggling to stay in the present and out of your head, try talking with a quality therapist from BetterHelp. They have psychologists, family therapists, marriage counselors, social workers, and more. Whatever you need to work through, BetterHelp can match you with a seasoned professional with the specialty that you need.

• 1:35:04Joe Rogan?

  BetterHelp is now a network with more than 125 health plans with many copays as low as $15 for eligible members. And if you don't have eligible insurance or live outside the US, you can still get 20% off your first month. Sign up and get 20% off at betterhelp.com. That's better H E L P dot com.

• 1:35:26Speaker 03

  Quit that roughhousing.

• 1:35:28Speaker 02

  It was leg.

• 1:35:29Speaker 03

  Course play.

• 1:35:30Speaker 02

  It was leg.

• 1:35:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's a wacky time to be alive. I can't tell if it's a great time.

• 1:35:36Joe Rogan?

  Oh, it's a great time.

• 1:35:37Speaker 03

  Or it's a horrible time.

• 1:35:38Speaker 02

  As soon as that happens.

• 1:35:39Joe Rogan?

  It's a great time.

• 1:35:40Speaker 02

  If you're at all running a company, which the government is, right? You should be like, oh, hey, no. We're replacing you.

• 1:35:46Joe Rogan?

  There's something wrong.

• 1:35:47Speaker 02

  You can't be in charge of it.

• 1:35:48Joe Rogan?

  You're so, it's not like he's young.

• 1:35:50Speaker 02

  We'll give you a pension now.

• 1:35:51Joe Rogan?

  And he did this, like Federman, Federman had a stroke.

• 1:35:53Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:35:54Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's like, that's an old guy. You can't drive, you take away their license if they do stuff like that.

• 1:35:59Joe Rogan?

  100%. That guy could be at a red light, just locked up.

• 1:36:01Speaker 03

  Haha.

• 1:36:02Joe Rogan?

  Or just go right into an intersection and not even know he got his foot off the brakes.

• 1:36:06Speaker 02

  You ever, you ever be at a red light, high, and fall asleep? And then when you wake up and somebody honks, you go, nah, I should pull over.

• 1:36:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:36:13Speaker 02

  This is wrong.

• 1:36:14Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 1:36:15Speaker 03

  Jesus Christ.

• 1:36:16Speaker 02

  No, me neither. I just heard about people.

• 1:36:17Joe Rogan?

  I've never gone like that.

• 1:36:18Speaker 03

  You ever texting for like 20 minutes, you look up, you're like, damn, that was dangerous.

• 1:36:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:36:23Speaker 03

  Holy shit.

• 1:36:24Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no, never. I used the Apple CarPlay thing.

• 1:36:26Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:36:27Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you just press to text. You say, uh, text Mark Norman. What would you like to say?

• 1:36:32Speaker 02

  Write it, Margaret Normasso.

• 1:36:34Joe Rogan?

  It says it back to you. Sometimes it fucks it up, which is a real problem. If you have any weird naming street or something like that, that won't work.

• 1:36:40Speaker 02

  That's Burt. Every time Burt sends a text, it's like, what is this? He goes, oh, it's speech to text, like, or fat fingers.

• 1:36:46Speaker 03

  Yeah, or slurring.

• 1:36:47Joe Rogan?

  Speech to text is really easy if you're busy because you can get away with doing it like in five seconds what would take you like 20 minutes to type out.

• 1:36:56Speaker 02

  The best was Dana White would, went to a flip phone so we could feel the buttons so we could have a business meeting. Tell me if I'm wrong.

• 1:37:02Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you're wrong.

• 1:37:03Speaker 02

  I'm wrong? And text under the table?

• 1:37:05Joe Rogan?

  He definitely texted under the table, but that's not why. He just started out with a flip phone and when everybody was going to smartphones, he's like, I can just text with my finger.

• 1:37:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:37:14Joe Rogan?

  And he was so busy, he's like, I don't have time for fucking apps. Like, what are you doing?

• 1:37:17Speaker 03

  But isn't that T9? That shit takes a half hour.

• 1:37:18Speaker 02

  But you can feel the buttons.

• 1:37:19Joe Rogan?

  He could do it without looking.

• 1:37:20Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 1:37:21Joe Rogan?

  So, him and I were having dinner and he sent me a text without looking. He goes, I'm gonna send you a text right now. I don't have to look at my phone.

• 1:37:27Speaker 03

  Was it accurate?

• 1:37:28Joe Rogan?

  It was accurate. I was like, wow.

• 1:37:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, he's a pro.

• 1:37:30Joe Rogan?

  It wasn't crazy. He used like the letter U for you. That's when that shit started. That used to drive me crazy.

• 1:37:35Speaker 03

  Don't do it.

• 1:37:36Joe Rogan?

  Even back in the T9 days.

• 1:37:37Speaker 03

  Don't you do it. There's two of them now, you son of a bitch.

• 1:37:40Joe Rogan?

  Even in the T9 days, I used Y-O-U.

• 1:37:44Speaker 02

  Even then?

• 1:37:44Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, not U-R either. Y-O-U apostrophe R-E. I don't know if I did that. Could you even do an apostrophe back then?

• 1:37:51Speaker 02

  You can. It's a four button thing.

• 1:37:53Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, we're talking to Mr. Flip phone right here.

• 1:37:56Speaker 02

  I gotta get back there. I gotta go back like the island.

• 1:37:58Joe Rogan?

  Well, Dave Attell's still on it.

• 1:38:00Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 1:38:01Speaker 02

  Dave has like three phones.

• 1:38:03Speaker 03

  I saw him the other night. He had some killer new. He's so timely and relevant. He like two minutes on White Lotus. It was gold.

• 1:38:10Joe Rogan?

  What's White Lotus?

• 1:38:11Speaker 02

  Was it Zanzaya's TV show?

• 1:38:13Speaker 03

  It's a TV show on HBO.

• 1:38:14Speaker 04

  This guy with the giant fake cock in it that really tricked me.

• 1:38:17Speaker 03

  Steve's on.

• 1:38:18Speaker 02

  Got your heart?

• 1:38:18Speaker 04

  No, the season two.

• 1:38:20Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:38:20Speaker 04

  It's like a real hot guy and he goes in and changes while a girl's uh...

• 1:38:23Speaker 03

  Oh, yes.

• 1:38:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, did you see Peaky Blinders?

• 1:38:26Speaker 02

  Oh, Peaky Blinders rules.

• 1:38:27Joe Rogan?

  How about that scene where that lady sucking, or that guy sucking that other guy's cock?

• 1:38:30Speaker 03

  Pull it up.

• 1:38:31Joe Rogan?

  Which, which episode was that? No, lady is literally sucking a guy's rubber cock.

• 1:38:37Speaker 03

  What?

• 1:38:37Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, there's like an orgy and this lady is, it's either a lady sucking a guy's cock or a guy sucking a guy's cock. A hundred percent.

• 1:38:44Speaker 02

  That's like Bar Mitzvah video.

• 1:38:46Speaker 04

  Uh, could I get a beer?

• 1:38:47Speaker 03

  Oh shit, I gotta pee too.

• 1:38:48Joe Rogan?

  Some guy was sucking another guy's cock.

• 1:38:50Speaker 04

  Peaky Blinders?

• 1:38:51Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm gonna pee too.

• 1:38:52Speaker 02

  The Irish movie.

• 1:38:53Speaker 03

  You go first.

• 1:38:53Speaker 04

  This could be mean, all right?

• 1:38:54Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you guys can do it.

• 1:38:55Speaker 04

  Yeah, we can do it.

• 1:38:57Speaker 02

  Talk about...

• 1:38:58Speaker 03

  I'm gonna hold it. If you go, then I'll go. I had some, I had a few at the Delta Lounge.

• 1:39:03Speaker 02

  Nice.

• 1:39:03Speaker 04

  Oh, you had some drinks on the lounge?

• 1:39:05Speaker 03

  Well, I was so hungover. I had to get a BM. Well, I did a show in Charleston. Uh, it was great, great crowd, but yeah, after it, that's a drinking town.

• 1:39:14Speaker 02

  Norman, Norman got me into the lounge once and I was like, oh, let me get a drink. He's like,

• 1:39:17Joe Rogan?

  What are you, there's free drinks. Why'd you order that? They have a whole list of free drinks.

• 1:39:21Speaker 04

  Norman's jewelry that I have. Oh, definitely. Yeah. I've seen Norman eat wings off a plate, going to the kitchen at the cellar. Like, whoa, that's untouched.

• 1:39:28Speaker 03

  We had that steak last night at the stand or two nights ago.

• 1:39:31Speaker 02

  Whose steak is this? He's just like, let me just have a piece. A third of it. It's in his mouth.

• 1:39:36Speaker 03

  Never got caught.

• 1:39:37Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:39:38Speaker 03

  I don't know whose that was. Hey, buy some bodega cat, but everybody while Joe's in the shitter.

• 1:39:43Speaker 04

  That was a funny defense of believing in dragons.

• 1:39:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:39:47Speaker 04

  And then going Sasquatch.

• 1:39:48Speaker 02

  Sasquatch is real though.

• 1:39:49Speaker 03

  He's like, yeah.

• 1:39:50Speaker 02

  I love when you're like, you could have got me on a real thing.

• 1:39:52Speaker 04

  Yeah, you could have got me on Sasquatch.

• 1:39:54Speaker 03

  I think they got him on that one.

• 1:39:56Speaker 02

  Now, the view rules. What's going on with you?

• 1:39:59Speaker 03

  Uh oh.

• 1:39:59Speaker 02

  You seem fucked up.

• 1:40:00Speaker 04

  I don't know. I know that's the worst thing somebody can say to you, so I do apologize.

• 1:40:04Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 1:40:05Speaker 04

  You're quiet when I got here?

• 1:40:06Speaker 02

  Editing my special. I got a special coming out.

• 1:40:08Speaker 03

  Oh shit, a new one?

• 1:40:10Speaker 02

  January fourteenth, Netflix, Netflix.com.

• 1:40:12Speaker 04

  Drink up a little, get fired up.

• 1:40:13Speaker 02

  Dude, I'm doing whiskey all day. This is my third one.

• 1:40:15Speaker 03

  We started before you got there.

• 1:40:17Speaker 04

  You had three drinks?

• 1:40:18Speaker 02

  And we started before we started.

• 1:40:21Speaker 03

  Before we started, you're drooling. You're a mess.

• 1:40:27Speaker 03

  Alright, now I gotta wee wee.

• 1:40:28Speaker 02

  Yeah, we have no leader with Joe Rogan going, we're all just floating like, um, things are weird.

• 1:40:33Speaker 04

  Yeah, I was just like, what's going on? Are you okay?

• 1:40:37Speaker 04

  We had nothing.

• 1:40:39Joe Rogan?

  It is, I mean, it is a fun time. It's a fun time. It really is. You can't, it's scary, but it's a fun time.

• 1:40:45Speaker 04

  These times?

• 1:40:45Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, as long as the war doesn't really break off, a real, actual hot war, if, if they can stop these motherfuckers from doing that, it's a fun time.

• 1:40:52Speaker 04

  She keeps telling me to chill, cause I keep following that.

• 1:40:55Speaker 02

  What?

• 1:40:55Speaker 04

  It fucks me, that fucking lady's nuclear war book.

• 1:40:58Speaker 02

  Who?

• 1:40:58Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. A Jacobson.

• 1:41:00Speaker 04

  It fucked me up.

• 1:41:01Joe Rogan?

  Terrifying.

• 1:41:02Speaker 02

  One from Broad City?

• 1:41:03Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 1:41:03Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:41:06Joe Rogan?

  Arthur.

• 1:41:07Speaker 04

  She, this lady wrote a book about what would happen during a nuclear war.

• 1:41:11Speaker 02

  Well, I would die instantly, I'm in, I'm in New York.

• 1:41:13Speaker 04

  We all would.

• 1:41:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:41:14Speaker 04

  But.

• 1:41:15Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, New York's getting nuked first.

• 1:41:16Speaker 04

  And how dumb it is, and how quickly it, like, both have a policy that's like, alright, yes. Like, if they think there's a nuke.

• 1:41:23Speaker 02

  I was in Cuba, so me and Bobby were like researching like, the Cuban Missile Crisis and the Bay of Pigs while we were there. And then, uh, man, how close it was with that submarine. Three out of four Russians were like, we, we can't talk to Russia.

• 1:41:36Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:41:37Speaker 02

  So like, there must be a reason for that. I bet they're attacked, we should launch. And one out of the four was like.

• 1:41:42Speaker 04

  One guy.

• 1:41:42Joe Rogan?

  Yep.

• 1:41:43Speaker 02

  Hold on though.

• 1:41:44Speaker 04

  Saved the entire world.

• 1:41:45Speaker 02

  Let's wait an hour.

• 1:41:46Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:41:47Joe Rogan?

  Jesus Christ.

• 1:41:47Speaker 02

  That's how close it was. And if he launched, then, then America would have to launch.

• 1:41:50Speaker 04

  But, you know, I know we're supposed to support the bros, but the guys on the fucking nuclear subs that, like, they're only, they're gonna just destroy the world and then. Then what, you fucking surface?

• 1:42:01Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:42:02Speaker 04

  And go, alright, well.

• 1:42:03Joe Rogan?

  Right. What are you coming back to?

• 1:42:05Speaker 02

  Yeah, stay down there as long as you can.

• 1:42:07Joe Rogan?

  You're coming back to a destroyed world.

• 1:42:08Speaker 04

  Yeah, don't do it.

• 1:42:09Joe Rogan?

  Not like there's spots you can go to, like the whole world's cooked.

• 1:42:12Speaker 04

  The whole thing's gone.

• 1:42:13Speaker 02

  Iceland, not even that.

• 1:42:15Joe Rogan?

  Where we're that, we're so close, the Russians had to warn the United States they were launching that missile at Ukraine.

• 1:42:20Speaker 04

  Yeah, cuz it would end the world.

• 1:42:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:42:22Speaker 03

  Whoa, is that why Ellen left?

• 1:42:23Joe Rogan?

  So it's the first time one of those missiles has ever been used. It's based on an intercontinental ballistic missile, but they called it a mid-range, so it's a mid-range ballistic missile.

• 1:42:32Speaker 04

  Hmm.

• 1:42:32Joe Rogan?

  And it easily could have a nuke on it. So when they launched it, they had to let the United States know that they were launching it, but they didn't say if they had a nuke on it or not.

• 1:42:40Speaker 04

  Oh, really?

• 1:42:41Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 1:42:42Speaker 03

  Shit.

• 1:42:43Speaker 02

  The Bay of Pigs is wild.

• 1:42:44Joe Rogan?

  I don't think they said, let's Google that, because what I read said-

• 1:42:47Speaker 04

  I thought they had to say, they had to have said, there's no way.

• 1:42:50Speaker 03

  Give it a Google.

• 1:42:50Speaker 04

  Right?

• 1:42:50Joe Rogan?

  You think they said-

• 1:42:51Speaker 04

  I think they said there's no news. This is just a show.

• 1:42:54Joe Rogan?

  I hope that's true, cuz-

• 1:42:57Speaker 04

  Is that what ended the fucking world?

• 1:42:59Joe Rogan?

  The thing that I read said that they didn't. Um, I do not know if that's true, though. But it's so, it's so hard to know what's true and what's not.

• 1:43:05Speaker 03

  You got that right.

• 1:43:05Joe Rogan?

  There's so many different stories out there.

• 1:43:06Speaker 04

  You know what I would like to know, is that footage of those-

• 1:43:09Joe Rogan?

  Do I believe in dragons? Do I not? So hard to know.

• 1:43:12Speaker 03

  I think you do.

• 1:43:13Joe Rogan?

  So hard to know.

• 1:43:14Speaker 03

  Bigfoot's real.

• 1:43:15Speaker 04

  Uh, they, the video of that missile landing, though, was that real?

• 1:43:20Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:43:20Speaker 03

  Oh, I saw that.

• 1:43:21Speaker 04

  Fucking cool as shit.

• 1:43:22Speaker 03

  That was awesome.

• 1:43:23Speaker 04

  Looked like lightning.

• 1:43:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it looked like it sucked downward.

• 1:43:26Speaker 04

  A missile just land-

• 1:43:27Joe Rogan?

  I mean, these are like some basically experimental things.

• 1:43:31Speaker 03

  Not landing?

• 1:43:32Speaker 04

  Am I drunk enough for you now?

• 1:43:34Joe Rogan?

  The stuff that we've seen is so small in comparison to the stuff that we have. We have stuff that would wipe out entire shelves of the continent.

• 1:43:44Speaker 03

  Let's do it.

• 1:43:45Joe Rogan?

  You would, you would kill, like, everyone in the UK instantaneously.

• 1:43:49Speaker 03

  Good.

• 1:43:50Speaker 04

  Yeah, get them Brits.

• 1:43:52Speaker 02

  Get them some fluoride first.

• 1:43:53Joe Rogan?

  If they really wanted to go ham, you know? If there was some sort of a, a real nuclear war and a bunch of them launched?

• 1:44:00Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:44:00Joe Rogan?

  And you, you hit Chicago with three big missiles with nukes on it, those things are a thousand times stronger than the Hiroshima bombs.

• 1:44:08Speaker 04

  Whoa, a thousand, twice would be enough.

• 1:44:10Joe Rogan?

  Let's see what the to- what the total is. How, what the, what is the most powerful ballistic missile that carries a UFO bomb? What can it do?

• 1:44:18Speaker 04

  Yeah, those-

• 1:44:19Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 1:44:21Speaker 03

  Whoa, whoa.

• 1:44:23Speaker 02

  Are those real? Nothing's.

• 1:44:25Speaker 03

  It's like raining down.

• 1:44:26Speaker 04

  It almost looks like the reverse footage of missiles firing.

• 1:44:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, it does.

• 1:44:30Joe Rogan?

  Jamie, how much more powerful are today's nuclear bombs than what they use in Hiroshima? It's some insane.

• 1:44:37Speaker 02

  More powerful than today's weed than the 70s weed.

• 1:44:41Joe Rogan?

  Don't you think there were some people in the 70s that had the real shit?

• 1:44:44Speaker 02

  Probably, right?

• 1:44:44Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:44:45Speaker 02

  Probably.

• 1:44:45Speaker 03

  This guy's getting cooked.

• 1:44:47Speaker 02

  When Jay, when Jay came, he used to come to LA and he goes, New York weed is as good as LA weed. I'm like, challenge accepted. And he, he assumed his weed was good.

• 1:44:55Joe Rogan?

  Do you remember the time?

• 1:44:56Speaker 02

  The 70s must have been that, a bunch of dwarfs going, oh, this weed is good. And the heads were like, no, no, no.

• 1:45:01Joe Rogan?

  Remember the time we fucked up? We went to Philly and we fucked up because we disregarded their weed. We went, Philly weed, silly Philly weed. And we got obliterated and we could barely talk on stage.

• 1:45:11Speaker 03

  Heroin.

• 1:45:13Joe Rogan?

  We got obliterated. It was fun.

• 1:45:15Speaker 02

  It was fun.

• 1:45:16Speaker 03

  It's like anything, blow, you can get some good blow out there.

• 1:45:19Joe Rogan?

  So how much bigger is it than Hiroshima? Okay, so look how tiny.

• 1:45:23Speaker 02

  This is Rogan's Club.

• 1:45:24Joe Rogan?

  So Hiroshima is 15 kilotons.

• 1:45:27Speaker 02

  Kill Tony.

• 1:45:27Joe Rogan?

  15 kilotons for Little Boy and the Russian ICBM has 800 kilotons.

• 1:45:34Speaker 02

  Oh my god.

• 1:45:35Speaker 03

  I don't know what that means.

• 1:45:36Joe Rogan?

  That's a lot.

• 1:45:36Speaker 04

  It would just suck.

• 1:45:38Joe Rogan?

  It would suck so hard.

• 1:45:39Speaker 02

  100, 300 times.

• 1:45:41Speaker 04

  New York maps and see where I live in Queens.

• 1:45:43Joe Rogan?

  That's so crazy.

• 1:45:43Speaker 04

  Great, we'd just be on fire, we'd be in the fire zone.

• 1:45:46Speaker 02

  I would love to be, someone, later generations would come to see me, like, playing video games.

• 1:45:51Speaker 04

  Frozen, Jackal off, yeah.

• 1:45:53Speaker 03

  Oh yeah, Pompeii.

• 1:45:54Speaker 04

  Yeah, Pompeii, Jackal off guy.

• 1:45:55Speaker 03

  That's true, a couple of those guys were gay.

• 1:45:58Joe Rogan?

  How do you know?

• 1:45:58Speaker 03

  Pull it up.

• 1:45:59Joe Rogan?

  No, no, they were trying to say they were gay because they just want.

• 1:46:02Speaker 02

  They love putting gay on people. Abraham Lincoln was not gay, bro.

• 1:46:05Joe Rogan?

  Bro, these guys were dying in the middle of a fucking furnace of ash.

• 1:46:10Speaker 02

  We may as well try some cock.

• 1:46:12Joe Rogan?

  Don't you think they just hug each other? I mean, what, what would you do if your friends were there?

• 1:46:16Speaker 02

  I would not hug you, I would not hug any of you during that.

• 1:46:18Joe Rogan?

  You wouldn't know what to happen, you would cling to each other.

• 1:46:20Speaker 02

  Let's hug.

• 1:46:21Speaker 03

  There's a dog, like, mid-run, too.

• 1:46:23Joe Rogan?

  Bro, you would cling to each other. You would cling to each other. You'd be fucking, you'd be all cooking together.

• 1:46:30Speaker 03

  I could use a hug.

• 1:46:31Joe Rogan?

  Instantaneously.

• 1:46:37Speaker 03

  Oh, she's eating her out.

• 1:46:38Joe Rogan?

  It could have been some guy just hanging out with his friend, too. You fuckheads.

• 1:46:41Speaker 03

  What?

• 1:46:42Joe Rogan?

  Leave him alone.

• 1:46:42Speaker 02

  Could have been a mom and a daughter.

• 1:46:44Joe Rogan?

  But it wasn't everybody gay back then, though?

• 1:46:45Speaker 03

  Why is it true?

• 1:46:46Speaker 02

  Historians love putting gay on everybody.

• 1:46:48Speaker 03

  I'm gay.

• 1:46:49Joe Rogan?

  Look at that cock.

• 1:46:49Speaker 02

  Go back up, go back up.

• 1:46:51Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 1:46:51Speaker 02

  Nice cock, dude.

• 1:46:53Speaker 03

  Pump it.

• 1:46:54Joe Rogan?

  That thing's on. Home to an open atmosphere surrounding sexuality and sex.

• 1:46:58Speaker 03

  Uncut.

• 1:46:58Joe Rogan?

  Multiple depictions of penises and sexual acts in statues and wall paintings. Oh, maybe they were gay.

• 1:47:03Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 1:47:04Joe Rogan?

  How about maybe everybody was gay back then? Maybe it's like Afghanistan.

• 1:47:06Speaker 02

  He's like that Spartan guy from Sigur's podcast.

• 1:47:09Joe Rogan?

  Look at that guy.

• 1:47:09Speaker 03

  Why not go gay? What do you got to lose? There's no cameras.

• 1:47:12Speaker 04

  Alexander the Great was not gay.

• 1:47:14Joe Rogan?

  What? Come on, I thought he was gay.

• 1:47:16Speaker 04

  Not gay.

• 1:47:17Speaker 03

  Big L.

• 1:47:17Joe Rogan?

  How do you know?

• 1:47:18Speaker 04

  There's no.

• 1:47:19Speaker 02

  His real name was Alexander the Gay.

• 1:47:21Speaker 04

  There's no record of him being gay, but he put up some statues of bros.

• 1:47:26Speaker 03

  How about that Rasputin cock?

• 1:47:28Joe Rogan?

  So what is the rumor for him being gay? What's it come from?

• 1:47:31Speaker 04

  Uh, it came from the movie Alexander.

• 1:47:33Joe Rogan?

  No way, really?

• 1:47:34Speaker 04

  That he was just gay the whole movie?

• 1:47:35Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 1:47:36Speaker 02

  Somebody had to be gay back then, though.

• 1:47:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:47:38Speaker 04

  Oh, they were all gay.

• 1:47:39Speaker 03

  They were all gay.

• 1:47:40Speaker 02

  If Diddy was, I mean, is it like Diddy gay? Or is it like a real gay?

• 1:47:44Joe Rogan?

  I think it was kinda gay.

• 1:47:46Speaker 04

  I think it was.

• 1:47:47Speaker 02

  Is it power gay?

• 1:47:47Speaker 04

  I think it was Diddy gay. I think he was having orgies.

• 1:47:50Joe Rogan?

  It's unknown if Alexander the Great was gay, but historians believe he likely had relationships with men. So he might not have been gay, just he fucks dudes?

• 1:47:56Speaker 02

  It's just like you're so sick of these Joe Behars that you're like, let me just fuck a dude.

• 1:48:00Speaker 04

  So long ago, they're just making shit up.

• 1:48:02Joe Rogan?

  If it was between Whoopi Goldberg and Alexander the Great, he's getting fucked.

• 1:48:06Speaker 02

  At least I can talk to the guys.

• 1:48:07Joe Rogan?

  Ancient Greece, many men engaged in same-sex relationships without shame. Yeah, I think everybody was gay back then.

• 1:48:12Speaker 03

  Why not?

• 1:48:12Speaker 02

  Why not?

• 1:48:13Joe Rogan?

  I think there's a lot of.

• 1:48:14Speaker 04

  They're gonna say that about us then. They're gonna go, look, man, every billboard was guys kissing.

• 1:48:18Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no.

• 1:48:19Speaker 02

  These guys just had an excuse to meet to talk about parks?

• 1:48:22Joe Rogan?

  This is like climate change. This is a blip that goes up and it's gonna come down. Guys sucking. That's what it's like. Yeah, guys sucking each other all over the place. It's like, hey, that's kinda gross.

• 1:48:29Speaker 03

  I don't know, I saw that Jaguar ad.

• 1:48:31Joe Rogan?

  There's always gonna be a certain, just kill Jaguar like fucking Kid Rock killed Bud Light.

• 1:48:35Speaker 04

  I mean, what would they do?

• 1:48:35Speaker 02

  What was that?

• 1:48:36Joe Rogan?

  What are they doing? You didn't see the Jaguar ad?

• 1:48:38Speaker 02

  Okay Jaguar, I get most of my news from being on this podcast.

• 1:48:41Joe Rogan?

  The Jaguar, good, this is reliable, unlike ABC News. The Jaguar ad is the fucking craziest speech, the guy gives a speech like it's four years ago.

• 1:48:50Speaker 02

  Wait.

• 1:48:50Joe Rogan?

  Like he's in the throes of the fucking BLM movement and like the wokest of woke times.

• 1:48:57Speaker 03

  Really?

• 1:48:57Joe Rogan?

  He should be wearing a mask when he does this speech.

• 1:48:59Speaker 03

  Oh, here we go.

• 1:49:00Joe Rogan?

  See if you can find the speech, the ad is ridiculous.

• 1:49:03Speaker 02

  This?

• 1:49:03Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, this is Jaguar.

• 1:49:04Speaker 03

  What is this, the Olympics?

• 1:49:05Joe Rogan?

  This is sports cars.

• 1:49:08Speaker 03

  Alright, well, it's not so bad.

• 1:49:10Joe Rogan?

  It's kinda cool.

• 1:49:10Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's pretty cool.

• 1:49:11Speaker 02

  What is that, the cars?

• 1:49:12Speaker 03

  Lot of colors.

• 1:49:12Joe Rogan?

  Well, this is just weird, which is fine, I like weird.

• 1:49:15Speaker 02

  Target.

• 1:49:17Joe Rogan?

  Okay, yeah, but I'm asking for the press conference.

• 1:49:18Speaker 03

  Is that Megan Rapinoe?

• 1:49:19Joe Rogan?

  So the press conference is where the guy starts to talk, the ad is just weird. But then the press conference, the guy talks about how inclusive, they want all diverse and this is...

• 1:49:31Joe Rogan?

  You got wrong ones.

• 1:49:32Speaker 02

  Jacksonville Jaguar, shout out Gabe Davis.

• 1:49:35Speaker 03

  Gay.

• 1:49:36Joe Rogan?

  Gay Davis. Just, see, I know you can find it. It's about inclusivity and a bunch of nonsense. And the way they say it, it's just like, what are you, are you selling cars or not? Like, why are you selling this political ideology? I thought you made sports cars.

• 1:49:51Speaker 02

  You ever see Century of the Self?

• 1:49:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, hell yeah.

• 1:49:53Speaker 02

  They're no longer selling the thing that has, Adam Kurt, they're no longer selling the thing that has the value. So like pianos stop going from like, this is a good Steinway piano with good sound to, this will bring your family together. And when you see the guy from fucking True Detective going, the freedom I get from driving on the road. That's got nothing to do with your motor. They're selling that to everybody on every front.

• 1:50:12Speaker 03

  It's like Subaru made with love.

• 1:50:13Joe Rogan?

  Thing you're selling, this thing you're selling is not your audience.

• 1:50:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:50:18Joe Rogan?

  Your audience is, people want to hear cars.

• 1:50:22Joe Rogan?

  Oh dude, the Jaguar coupes are fucking badass.

• 1:50:25Speaker 03

  They're pretty cool.

• 1:50:26Joe Rogan?

  They are badass.

• 1:50:27Speaker 03

  Not anymore?

• 1:50:27Joe Rogan?

  They make, that's the problem, they're badass for guys like us.

• 1:50:30Speaker 02

  The Jaguar was always in the shop, that was the, that was the thing.

• 1:50:33Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 1:50:33Joe Rogan?

  The new ones are more reliable. They say about every single car. I think the new ones are owned by Ford, actually.

• 1:50:37Speaker 03

  They bought them.

• 1:50:38Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, the new Jaguars, the V8 coupe is a fucking beast.

• 1:50:42Speaker 02

  Wait, Ford did this?

• 1:50:43Joe Rogan?

  It's an amazing car. I don't know, I think this is a different...

• 1:50:46Speaker 03

  They hired a guy.

• 1:50:47Joe Rogan?

  Did you find the press conference?

• 1:50:49Speaker 03

  Uh oh, Jamo's drunk.

• 1:50:50Speaker 02

  Scrubbed it, Kamala scrubbed it.

• 1:50:52Speaker 03

  Every time I type it in, it's just people complaining, like making videos complaining about I can't find it.

• 1:50:56Joe Rogan?

  I guarantee you can find it, you gotta go on Reddit.

• 1:50:58Speaker 02

  Remember the Trump, uh, Joe Rogan episode, you searched Joe Rogan, Donald Trump, and it was like,

• 1:51:03Joe Rogan?

  They fucked us.

• 1:51:03Speaker 02

  A bunch of fucking reaction videos came up first.

• 1:51:06Joe Rogan?

  They fucked us, they made it impossible to find the video. And we had to complain, and they said it was an accident.

• 1:51:11Speaker 03

  Ah!

• 1:51:12Speaker 02

  But like, how did this accident happen?

• 1:51:14Joe Rogan?

  They wouldn't say. See, here's the thing. Like, maybe there's a way that you can, but this is me completely speculating.

• 1:51:22Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:51:23Joe Rogan?

  But maybe there's a way, like, I don't like Ari Shaffir.

• 1:51:25Speaker 02

  You don't, you don't.

• 1:51:26Joe Rogan?

  And I run some sort of a super PAC.

• 1:51:28Speaker 02

  Very well known, yeah.

• 1:51:28Joe Rogan?

  So I run sort of a super PAC, or, uh, I think Ari Shaffir has a podcast that's dangerous.

• 1:51:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:51:34Joe Rogan?

  And it might, I might be able to do something by mass complaining about your podcast. Like, mass flagging it.

• 1:51:42Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:51:42Joe Rogan?

  Like, if I, if I have a bot system, and I can get like a million people to mass flag your video, maybe it gets put into a category where it's more difficult to find.

• 1:51:51Speaker 02

  They do that?

• 1:51:52Joe Rogan?

  I'm just imagining, if I ran a company, and it was potentially like a beheading Taliban video, and it got mass flagged, you'd want it really hard to find. So you would hide the actual title of it. You would make it so it's difficult to search.

• 1:52:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:52:06Joe Rogan?

  I guess, I'm just being as charitable as possible.

• 1:52:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, okay, right, right.

• 1:52:09Joe Rogan?

  That's what I could imagine.

• 1:52:11Speaker 02

  So, a bunch of people said fuck this.

• 1:52:12Joe Rogan?

  Now, I don't think they want people to know that that's possible. So when you ask them, "How did it happen?", they don't give you a straight explanation. Because if that's the case, and this is again,

• 1:52:21Speaker 03

  That's scary.

• 1:52:21Joe Rogan?

  Completely me speculating. But if I'm speculating, that you find out that that's a thing, and I bet somebody does know it's a thing, if it is a thing, they definitely don't want it publicly known. Because then,

• 1:52:31Speaker 02

  It is.

• 1:52:32Joe Rogan?

  All these other foreign countries, anybody who wants to stifle any kind of news story, anything, could just start using this process to hijack their system.

• 1:52:39Speaker 02

  No, anytime I've come into public fire, it's like, the videos that have nothing to do with it go lower. Because people are just like, "Let's just flag him." So you have, like you said, a thousand people flagging it, the box goes, "This is probably problematic."

• 1:52:51Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, and they don't, they don't have the time to be searching everything. The amount of shit that gets posted every second on YouTube is my- Blowing.

• 1:52:59Speaker 02

  Yo, can we talk about that Trump, that Trump speech? About going, we're not gonna do that shit anymore?

• 1:53:03Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, that was nice.

• 1:53:05Speaker 02

  That's, that's the only one I've tried to explain to people like what I've tried to, in the kindest way possible. And I, this is what I come up with. When I make fun of the dead Golden Girl, they can't ban me for bullying anymore.

• 1:53:16Speaker 03

  Betty White?

• 1:53:17Speaker 02

  Yeah, they'll have to go, that's definitely not bullying. We won't ban your account.

• 1:53:21Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 1:53:22Speaker 02

  You can actually get an answer. But I want to hear what he said, because it was so, it hyped me up.

• 1:53:26Joe Rogan?

  What he said is that you cannot have censorship on social media sites. And you can't have the government interfering with free speech.

• 1:53:34Speaker 03

  Said this video anywhere.

• 1:53:35Joe Rogan?

  I watched the video, Jamie.

• 1:53:37Speaker 03

  I'm not saying you didn't, I'm just saying I can't find it.

• 1:53:39Joe Rogan?

  Okay, well, keep looking.

• 1:53:40Speaker 03

  You need some regulate, you can't have faces of death up there.

• 1:53:42Joe Rogan?

  Keep looking, because I know you can find it.

• 1:53:44Speaker 03

  Doesn't, it only shows that this is the source of it is the Financial Times. It says it was an interview.

• 1:53:49Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but I watched it on Instagram.

• 1:53:51Speaker 03

  I did too. Typed it all over the place, I'm not seeing it.

• 1:53:54Joe Rogan?

  Did you type it on Instagram Jaguar ad?

• 1:53:56Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 1:53:57Joe Rogan?

  Or Jaguar press conference?

• 1:53:58Speaker 03

  I typed in the guy's name. Damn, do they scrub it?

• 1:54:02Joe Rogan?

  Maybe.

• 1:54:02Speaker 03

  That's crazy.

• 1:54:03Joe Rogan?

  They might.

• 1:54:04Speaker 02

  Wow, that could see him scrubbing.

• 1:54:05Joe Rogan?

  Did you see they scrubbed Jeffrey Epstein's connections to Bill Clinton off of Clinton's Wikipedia?

• 1:54:10Speaker 03

  Boy, Clinton's slippery, huh?

• 1:54:11Speaker 02

  Really?

• 1:54:12Speaker 03

  He's good.

• 1:54:12Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, in July.

• 1:54:13Speaker 02

  Duck, Duck and change my Wikipedia to go, Ari doesn't have any Jew gold, but he's hidden it among his friends.

• 1:54:18Joe Rogan?

  How the fuck do I know? Boy, you can't find it, Jamie, you're right.

• 1:54:22Speaker 02

  Also, the only people that-

• 1:54:22Speaker 03

  When I type in Jaguar and that guy's name, literally it says no results.

• 1:54:26Joe Rogan?

  This is crazy.

• 1:54:27Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 1:54:27Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 1:54:28Joe Rogan?

  The video, it must have been such a disaster, they must be so terrified of things like this. Of people like us talking about it.

• 1:54:33Speaker 02

  Shane's about to get into the sponsorship.

• 1:54:35Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:54:36Joe Rogan?

  See if you can find his quotes, so get his quotes, Jamie.

• 1:54:38Speaker 02

  I've always loved Jaguar.

• 1:54:39Speaker 03

  Bud Light and Jaguar, drinking and driving.

• 1:54:42Speaker 02

  Look at those freaks!

• 1:54:44Speaker 03

  Jaguar.

• 1:54:45Speaker 02

  That's crazy.

• 1:54:45Joe Rogan?

  Okay, literally says-

• 1:54:46Speaker 02

  They look like aliens.

• 1:54:47Joe Rogan?

  Jaguar managing director, uh, how do you say his name, Raw Don Glover?

• 1:54:51Speaker 02

  Crazy, bro.

• 1:54:51Joe Rogan?

  Hold on.

• 1:54:52Speaker 03

  That's kinda cool.

• 1:54:53Joe Rogan?

  Said in an interview with the Financial Times, the intended message had been lost in a blaze of intolerance on social media. And denied that the promotional video was intended as a woke statement. Fuck you, it wasn't.

• 1:55:03Speaker 03

  Joe, if you put his name together, it's Raw Dong Lover.

• 1:55:08Speaker 02

  Think about that? You ever think about that?

• 1:55:12Speaker 04

  I haven't thought about that at all.

• 1:55:13Speaker 02

  Dong lover.

• 1:55:14Speaker 03

  He just blew my mind.

• 1:55:15Joe Rogan?

  We need to reestablish our brand and at a completely different price point.

• 1:55:19Speaker 02

  That was a tweet, I saw that.

• 1:55:20Speaker 04

  Oh, okay.

• 1:55:21Speaker 02

  I was high credit, I'm not that quick.

• 1:55:22Speaker 04

  It did seem a little too smart.

• 1:55:23Joe Rogan?

  Look at this, we need to move away from traditional automotive stereotypes. Glover said that while the overall buzz, the new campaign had been very positive. Look, that ad didn't bother me at all, I thought the ad was cool. The things that he was saying, vile hatred and intolerance in the comments regarding the individuals that appear in the video. Well, that I don't agree with. But what I do agree with was the things that he was saying were like crazy, like you're supposed to be a car company, tell me how awesome your car is. What are the quotes, though?

• 1:55:49Speaker 02

  No, you gotta, you gotta look at Matthew McConaughey talking about Lincoln. It's got nothing to do with the car. It's the same shit, they all do the same shit.

• 1:55:56Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, no, this was a press conference.

• 1:55:59Speaker 03

  There's no car.

• 1:55:59Speaker 02

  I was talking about the commercial.

• 1:56:00Joe Rogan?

  Okay, but this was a guy on stage that was saying all these crazy things. That's what everybody exploded about. That's what you can't find, you can still find that commercial, because the commercial's cool. Like, I don't give a fuck if you want people painted up and dancing in a commercial, it's visually interesting.

• 1:56:14Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:56:15Speaker 03

  It's like Apple.

• 1:56:16Joe Rogan?

  But now, Jamie, Google Jaguar, top of the line, coupe, whatever it is, the V8, V8 coupe.

• 1:56:24Speaker 02

  Jamie, type in 8008.

• 1:56:26Joe Rogan?

  Come on, coupes. The top of the line, whatever their fucking new one is.

• 1:56:31Speaker 02

  Is it called coupe?

• 1:56:32Speaker 04

  Do you actually, is that how you're supposed to say it?

• 1:56:34Joe Rogan?

  That thing is a beast, dude.

• 1:56:35Speaker 02

  Is it not coupe?

• 1:56:36Joe Rogan?

  Give me some volume, so I can hear what this sounds like.

• 1:56:38Speaker 02

  Wait, hold on a second.

• 1:56:39Speaker 04

  Wait, hold on.

• 1:56:40Speaker 02

  Time out.

• 1:56:40Joe Rogan?

  Is it not coupe? They say coupe in England.

• 1:56:42Speaker 03

  It's like Porsche.

• 1:56:43Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, exactly. See if you can find one that has sound, because the thing sounds fucking incredible.

• 1:56:48Speaker 03

  It's a good looking ride.

• 1:56:49Speaker 02

  It's like a Dawson 280 SX?

• 1:56:52Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:56:52Speaker 02

  What are you talking about? What do you mean?

• 1:56:54Joe Rogan?

  Go to videos, Jamie, what do you mean? You hear this thing, now this, this is the type of car that you're, you're not gonna...

• 1:57:03Speaker 02

  I love you, buddy.

• 1:57:06Joe Rogan?

  Give me some, like, go to where they're driving it.

• 1:57:08Speaker 06

  Welcome to Extra Throttle House.

• 1:57:09Joe Rogan?

  Here we go, right there.

• 1:57:10Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:57:11Joe Rogan?

  Go to where they're driving it.

• 1:57:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh, he's driving an Aston. Here it is.

• 1:57:16Speaker 06

  It's quite interesting getting out of somebody that's hundreds of thousands of miles.

• 1:57:19Speaker 04

  These two guys are gonna get caught in a volcano sucking each other.

• 1:57:23Speaker 03

  Like pumping.

• 1:57:25Speaker 02

  Let's go to the woods where no one can see us.

• 1:57:27Joe Rogan?

  Let's test the steering.

• 1:57:29Speaker 02

  This is the throttle house.

• 1:57:31Joe Rogan?

  It's, uh...

• 1:57:32Speaker 02

  I'm excited with electricity.

• 1:57:33Joe Rogan?

  It's an amazing car.

• 1:57:34Speaker 03

  Rear end be.

• 1:57:35Joe Rogan?

  That's all I have to say. I would've bought one. I would've bought one before that press conference.

• 1:57:39Speaker 03

  Well, the 69 Jaguar is like the most coveted collectible.

• 1:57:44Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's a coveted collectible.

• 1:57:45Speaker 02

  I drove one of those. Mitzi let me drive one of those for a while.

• 1:57:48Joe Rogan?

  Elon used to have one of those.

• 1:57:49Speaker 03

  Really?

• 1:57:49Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, they're cool. It's got the long front end.

• 1:57:51Speaker 03

  Yes, exactly.

• 1:57:52Joe Rogan?

  They're interesting. There's a company that takes them and makes them resto mods now. So they make them drivable. So you could drive one today and don't feel like you're gonna die every time you hit the brakes.

• 1:58:01Speaker 03

  Yeah, they're unreliable.

• 1:58:02Joe Rogan?

  Try, if you drive in a 1969 car today, they're fucking garbage.

• 1:58:07Speaker 03

  I got a 73 Beamer. I've never had one problem with it.

• 1:58:10Joe Rogan?

  This is the guy. This is the guy.

• 1:58:11Speaker 03

  This says head of marketing.

• 1:58:12Joe Rogan?

  Oh, fuck. What's he wearing?

• 1:58:13Speaker 02

  Oh, my god.

• 1:58:14Joe Rogan?

  Listen to what this guy says.

• 1:58:15Speaker 02

  Mateo's up there telling us what to do?

• 1:58:17Joe Rogan?

  Who, who is this?

• 1:58:20Speaker 05

  And that Jaguar, we are passionate about our people. And we're committed to fostering a diverse, inclusive, and unified culture that is representative not only of the people who use our products,

• 1:58:32Speaker 02

  Why they have an American man?

• 1:58:35Joe Rogan?

  Cause he's got a great shirt on.

• 1:58:39Speaker 03

  He's dominating in that shirt. He's like George Michael.

• 1:58:46Speaker 02

  What?

• 1:58:47Speaker 03

  But we're trying to sell a car.

• 1:58:48Speaker 02

  Motors! Tires!

• 1:58:52Joe Rogan?

  Action. They're activists.

• 1:58:58Speaker 02

  Surprise.

• 1:58:59Speaker 04

  Shout out, pride.

• 1:59:00Speaker 02

  Shout out, pride.

• 1:59:01Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:59:08Speaker 02

  This is so retarded.

• 1:59:10Speaker 03

  It's kinda Bud Lighty.

• 1:59:11Joe Rogan?

  Transitionary.

• 1:59:12Speaker 04

  No, no, no, don't.

• 1:59:13Joe Rogan?

  Transitioning at work.

• 1:59:15Speaker 04

  Transitioning at work.

• 1:59:16Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:17Speaker 03

  Tranny fluid.

• 1:59:18Speaker 02

  Oh, my god. It's so crazy that it has nothing to do with the product.

• 1:59:21Joe Rogan?

  That's what I'm saying.

• 1:59:22Speaker 02

  It's crazy.

• 1:59:22Joe Rogan?

  So, this is what you're doing. You're pushing an ideology on a bunch of people that just want cool cars.

• 1:59:27Speaker 02

  Like, what?

• 1:59:28Joe Rogan?

  Like, hey, I don't disagree with any of those things. I want everybody to be happy, but shut the fuck up when you're selling cars.

• 1:59:33Speaker 02

  What do I buy?

• 1:59:34Speaker 04

  I think, personally, like, the annoyance is, like, that level of, like, politicizing a brand. That's like a big company.

• 1:59:43Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:43Speaker 04

  That's Jaguar. On the right, the only, the only time you see, like, a right-wing, it's fucking MyPillow.

• 1:59:48Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:49Speaker 04

  It's literally fucking gold coins in MyPillow. Those are the guys giving speeches. They're like, this country, we need a fucking.

• 1:59:55Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:56Speaker 04

  And it's like, fuck My, I mean, fuck those guys. That's funny. But when it's a major company and they're like, we're gay, fuck you.

• 2:00:03Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:00:03Speaker 02

  The most, he listed eight things and not one of them was the steering wheel.

• 2:00:07Joe Rogan?

  Right. Bro, letting their employees be their authentic self.

• 2:00:11Speaker 04

  Your mother-in-law likes the steering wheel.

• 2:00:11Joe Rogan?

  What does that even mean? Letting them be their, you're putting that at a, above.

• 2:00:16Speaker 02

  I'm gonna come at you tomorrow when I get that.

• 2:00:19Joe Rogan?

  You're putting that above.

• 2:00:20Speaker 02

  I'm gonna think about that for three days and then come back at you.

• 2:00:22Joe Rogan?

  You're putting that above making a good car, and that's all anybody gives a fuck about.

• 2:00:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:00:26Joe Rogan?

  You guys are stupid.

• 2:00:27Speaker 03

  Well, Boeing, Boeing cut out the DI.

• 2:00:30Joe Rogan?

  Well, they're all cutting it out, because it's killing their business.

• 2:00:32Speaker 02

  It's what killed the Democrats.

• 2:00:34Speaker 03

  We could use a little on this show. Couple of old honkies talking shit.

• 2:00:39Joe Rogan?

  He puts the glasses on because he doesn't like what he just said.

• 2:00:43Speaker 03

  We're gonna get, uh, Brian Simpson in here.

• 2:00:45Joe Rogan?

  He's gonna hide.

• 2:00:45Speaker 04

  Good Simpsons, fuck.

• 2:00:46Speaker 03

  Kathy Griffin, something.

• 2:00:48Joe Rogan?

  Kathy Griffin. That poor lady.

• 2:00:50Speaker 03

  Trump head.

• 2:00:52Speaker 02

  Kathy Griffin got the raw deal.

• 2:00:53Speaker 04

  I hope, uh.

• 2:00:54Joe Rogan?

  That was a while when the whole, that Trump head, especially when she had been on the fucking show. That's what's even crazier. She was on The Apprentice.

• 2:01:01Speaker 03

  Was she really?

• 2:01:01Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. I don't know. She's a guest.

• 2:01:03Speaker 02

  But it's like.

• 2:01:04Joe Rogan?

  Wasn't she? I don't know about that. Wasn't Kathy Griffin on The Apprentice?

• 2:01:07Speaker 02

  But who took her out? Which side took her out?

• 2:01:09Joe Rogan?

  The right. Right.

• 2:01:10Speaker 02

  The right. That's so crazy, cause the right, the right is such, is, a lot of them are as gay as the left.

• 2:01:16Joe Rogan?

  It's the woke right. They call it the woke right.

• 2:01:19Speaker 02

  The woke right, yep.

• 2:01:19Joe Rogan?

  Kathy Griffin says Donald Trump smelled really bad on The Apprentice. Yeah.

• 2:01:23Speaker 02

  Okay, it's funny.

• 2:01:23Speaker 04

  I bet Kathy Griffin didn't still smell that great.

• 2:01:26Joe Rogan?

  I bet she smelled pretty bad as well.

• 2:01:28Speaker 02

  I could smell you over me.

• 2:01:29Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:01:30Speaker 03

  That was from an award show that they sponsored. It's called the Attitude Awards, where it's a lot of awards.

• 2:01:34Speaker 02

  What was?

• 2:01:35Speaker 03

  That.

• 2:01:36Joe Rogan?

  Jaguar.

• 2:01:36Speaker 02

  The Jaguar. Oh, so he's just there to speak about that?

• 2:01:38Joe Rogan?

  He was talking about Jaguar though.

• 2:01:39Speaker 02

  That's the problem too, like, we're hearing it about Jaguars, but he's just there to speak to that audience.

• 2:01:44Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:01:44Speaker 04

  Uh, alright.

• 2:01:45Joe Rogan?

  Which is, either way.

• 2:01:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:01:46Joe Rogan?

  You're still, you're publicly addressing the, you know, Jaguar, like, you're representing Jaguar.

• 2:01:52Speaker 02

  But I mean, if we're talking about, like, the fucking decor awards, and we talk about Tony's Thrones, it's like, what about his comedy? Like, that's not what we're doing here today.

• 2:01:58Joe Rogan?

  That's true.

• 2:01:59Speaker 04

  If I went to the gay fucking arena show, I'd be like, Jaguar's gay.

• 2:02:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:02:05Speaker 04

  I'm trying to sell Jaguars, and everyone's gay.

• 2:02:07Joe Rogan?

  The problem is if it gets online, right? And then people are talking about it.

• 2:02:10Speaker 02

  Always the problem is when it's shown to an audience that's not your intended audience.

• 2:02:14Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:02:15Speaker 02

  Same with Tony. Like, I'm just here to perform for these people.

• 2:02:17Joe Rogan?

  Exactly.

• 2:02:18Speaker 03

  It's like the Daniel Tosh joke. They took it out and put it on the news.

• 2:02:21Joe Rogan?

  Right, but the thing is, we don't want a company to be attached to anything like that. We don't want a company. We want a company to just sell cars. I don't want you to get politically active.

• 2:02:30Speaker 03

  No, enough.

• 2:02:31Joe Rogan?

  It's frustrating. I don't want it on either side. If like, if Ford was, like, really heavy on right-wing issues and constantly chirping about right-wing politics and Christianity and...

• 2:02:42Speaker 02

  Fuck abortion.

• 2:02:43Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:02:43Speaker 03

  Getting all Jesus-y.

• 2:02:46Joe Rogan?

  People drove people to abortions in Fords? Shut the fuck up. Yeah, you know, you'd be like, shut the fuck up. I don't want to hear it. I want you to sell cars. But I get if that guy's there to speak to those people, but the thing is, he's speaking, and they did.

• 2:03:00Speaker 02

  They all do it.

• 2:03:00Speaker 03

  I can type it in, yeah, they all do it.

• 2:03:01Speaker 02

  Every single one.

• 2:03:02Speaker 04

  That's what, that's actually, that's what I was arguing about Bud Light.

• 2:03:05Speaker 02

  The Budweiser can had a gay can every June.

• 2:03:07Joe Rogan?

  Every single one does.

• 2:03:08Speaker 03

  Well, they sponsored Pride.

• 2:03:09Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's what I mean. The gay can for Pride.

• 2:03:11Speaker 03

  Every company.

• 2:03:12Speaker 02

  And like, just give fifty bucks to a party in Chelsea.

• 2:03:14Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:03:15Speaker 03

  All of them.

• 2:03:16Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:03:16Speaker 02

  Look, we all like gay guys.

• 2:03:18Speaker 03

  Of course, they're funny as hell.

• 2:03:19Speaker 04

  It's great, kids of shit.

• 2:03:20Joe Rogan?

  Well, I hate any kind of discrimination and imagine being gay and all of a sudden someone's telling you you can't be gay. Like, Ben Shapiro had the craziest take on it. Ben Shapiro.

• 2:03:29Speaker 02

  Oh, my dad.

• 2:03:30Joe Rogan?

  He thinks you should treat it like you treat like not murdering somebody. It's like it's a sin. There's a lot of things you wanna do.

• 2:03:37Speaker 02

  The old Jewish thing. It's you treat it like gluttony, drunkenness, or whatever. It's like, it's a, it's a, you just got caught with that desire, you should overcome it.

• 2:03:44Joe Rogan?

  What do you Jews do to, like, what happens?

• 2:03:47Speaker 02

  Relax with you.

• 2:03:48Joe Rogan?

  You Jews, when you Jews are involved in like gay activities, do you like keep it on the hush hush?

• 2:03:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, they literally dig underground.

• 2:03:54Joe Rogan?

  Do you dig underground?

• 2:03:55Speaker 02

  That's for storage.

• 2:03:56Joe Rogan?

  Is that with the tunnels?

• 2:03:57Speaker 02

  Storage of fucking dudes.

• 2:03:59Joe Rogan?

  The storage bloody mattresses?

• 2:04:01Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's for storage, but no, we keep it hush hush.

• 2:04:03Joe Rogan?

  Why you storing that? Why you, how come you ever burn that?

• 2:04:08Speaker 02

  Listen, there's plenty of Shiva rabbis who are fucking kids. Uh, they report them. They go to jail sometimes. Sometimes they cover it up.

• 2:04:14Speaker 04

  It's always the Catholics.

• 2:04:15Speaker 02

  The checks and balances.

• 2:04:16Speaker 03

  Exactly.

• 2:04:17Joe Rogan?

  But wait a minute, isn't it more Catholics?

• 2:04:18Speaker 02

  It's way more Catholics.

• 2:04:19Speaker 03

  I think teachers fuck more kids than priests now.

• 2:04:22Speaker 02

  Girl teachers.

• 2:04:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, the girl teachers in Florida.

• 2:04:24Joe Rogan?

  They just busted another lady.

• 2:04:26Speaker 03

  See?

• 2:04:26Speaker 04

  I'm sure she was hot as fuck.

• 2:04:28Speaker 03

  That's the problem.

• 2:04:29Speaker 02

  She got busted.

• 2:04:29Joe Rogan?

  I bet she was, big old titties.

• 2:04:31Speaker 03

  The priest is creepy.

• 2:04:32Joe Rogan?

  Crazy look in her eye.

• 2:04:34Speaker 02

  It's all about boy sex or girl sex.

• 2:04:35Speaker 04

  Jamie, bring up some hot ladies.

• 2:04:36Speaker 02

  Jamie, search Pornhub dot com, use a VPN for that.

• 2:04:40Speaker 04

  Jamie, bring up some, uh, hot child rapist females.

• 2:04:42Joe Rogan?

  I think this lady had, uh, she had the kid porn on her, uh, computer too.

• 2:04:46Speaker 03

  Oh, the Asian?

• 2:04:47Joe Rogan?

  This is her.

• 2:04:48Speaker 02

  Not bad.

• 2:04:49Speaker 03

  Oh, no, not Asian.

• 2:04:50Speaker 02

  Dude, you would work for that at a bar.

• 2:04:52Speaker 03

  These girls are hot. What are they doing?

• 2:04:53Joe Rogan?

  Because they wanna fuck the guy that they couldn't fuck in high school.

• 2:04:56Speaker 02

  That's Adrianne Bollucci's joke. Adrianne Bollucci.

• 2:04:58Joe Rogan?

  Is that what she says?

• 2:04:59Speaker 02

  How bad do men, how bad are men that women have to turn to a fucking fourteen year old boy to fulfill their desires?

• 2:05:05Speaker 03

  This wasn't happening in the eighties, though.

• 2:05:07Joe Rogan?

  I think they see a guy that's gonna be a stud and they say, I wanna get him first.

• 2:05:11Speaker 03

  Look at that teacher. Love a lip bite.

• 2:05:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god, bite that lip with those glasses on. You dirty lady.

• 2:05:17Speaker 02

  Let her, let her.

• 2:05:18Joe Rogan?

  Tell me about scripture. Do you have your magic underwear on?

• 2:05:20Speaker 02

  Set it loose.

• 2:05:21Speaker 03

  And the kids are into it, so that makes it also okay.

• 2:05:23Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, the kids are hard as hell. Rock, they can come thirty times a day.

• 2:05:26Speaker 03

  And they become prom king after this, you're the most popular kid in the city.

• 2:05:29Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but they got big mouths, these fucking kids.

• 2:05:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, well, I would talk.

• 2:05:33Joe Rogan?

  That's what it is.

• 2:05:33Speaker 04

  She made sex tapes.

• 2:05:34Joe Rogan?

  Twenty-eight of them.

• 2:05:35Speaker 04

  Bold, bold.

• 2:05:36Joe Rogan?

  With a thirteen-year-old. What a wild bitch.

• 2:05:39Speaker 04

  Missouri goes.

• 2:05:40Joe Rogan?

  Asking other students to keep watch. She was having sex with kids while asking. She was asking other kids to watch while she banged a kid.

• 2:05:49Speaker 03

  Fuck the honor roll.

• 2:05:50Speaker 04

  Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

• 2:05:51Joe Rogan?

  You're talking over everybody. We're just watching it. She's asking other kids to watch out, look.

• 2:05:58Speaker 04

  She had a lookout.

• 2:06:00Speaker 03

  One-on-one teacher of the year.

• 2:06:01Joe Rogan?

  They were on the lookout.

• 2:06:01Speaker 04

  Who's this lady holding the fish, dude? If she fucked a kid, I'm gonna be pissed.

• 2:06:04Joe Rogan?

  She fucked all the kids.

• 2:06:05Speaker 03

  Oh, man.

• 2:06:06Joe Rogan?

  Look at her. Florida, middle, always Florida.

• 2:06:09Speaker 03

  Always Florida.

• 2:06:09Joe Rogan?

  Fourteen-year-olds, yes, ma'am, you did it. You did it, good job with the fish and the legs.

• 2:06:13Speaker 04

  Too many GMOs.

• 2:06:14Joe Rogan?

  That lady goes to the gym, she's a freak, she can't take it.

• 2:06:17Speaker 03

  Man.

• 2:06:18Joe Rogan?

  She's, she's born to be wild.

• 2:06:20Speaker 04

  It's not a lot of hot male pedophiles.

• 2:06:21Joe Rogan?

  Born to be wild. Look at her. Bro, she's always got a fucking can of alcohol in her hand.

• 2:06:29Speaker 04

  Dude, we can't be doing what we're doing.

• 2:06:31Joe Rogan?

  She's ready to go.

• 2:06:32Speaker 04

  She's like that Vegas senator.

• 2:06:33Speaker 03

  Do they go to jail, these gals?

• 2:06:34Joe Rogan?

  I hope not.

• 2:06:35Speaker 04

  JMo was getting in there, JMo was picking the hottest one.

• 2:06:38Joe Rogan?

  Just bleach their hair and chase their name.

• 2:06:40Speaker 04

  You've got that mustache and ponytail, you're a fucking sex pervert.

• 2:06:44Speaker 03

  He bookmarked it.

• 2:06:45Speaker 04

  You're fucking finding the hottest rapist teachers.

• 2:06:48Joe Rogan?

  Jesus Christ.

• 2:06:49Speaker 03

  Well, if it's consensual.

• 2:06:50Joe Rogan?

  Just dye her hair, change her name. Move her around like they move around those Catholic priests. That's what I say.

• 2:06:57Speaker 03

  Do a bumper sticker, like the honor roll.

• 2:06:59Joe Rogan?

  Move her around like they move those Catholic priests. They should have a new division of the Trump administration. Just move freaks around. To some kids that don't know how to write.

• 2:07:09Speaker 03

  That'll motivate you.

• 2:07:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, get some kids who know how to keep their fucking mouth shut. We found a group of boys.

• 2:07:15Speaker 03

  You give me an A, I'll give you the D.

• 2:07:17Joe Rogan?

  Understand that I keep a fucking secret, these little rats.

• 2:07:19Speaker 04

  This is Billy Madison.

• 2:07:21Speaker 03

  Yes. Want to touch the heiny?

• 2:07:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:07:25Speaker 04

  Can I have a beer too?

• 2:07:25Joe Rogan?

  Yes, sir. That nice lady sucked your dick and you got her locked up in a cage.

• 2:07:29Speaker 03

  Veronica Vaughn.

• 2:07:30Speaker 04

  So hot.

• 2:07:31Joe Rogan?

  There's so many of them and they're hot.

• 2:07:32Speaker 03

  They're all hot.

• 2:07:33Joe Rogan?

  That's what's crazy.

• 2:07:34Speaker 03

  Also, these kids can get a boner.

• 2:07:36Joe Rogan?

  Oh, a lot of boners.

• 2:07:37Speaker 04

  That's the thing.

• 2:07:38Joe Rogan?

  They got a lot of boners.

• 2:07:39Speaker 04

  They know wrong is right.

• 2:07:40Speaker 03

  I lost my virginity to like a fifty-something-year-old and I think she was just like, I need a guy who can get hard.

• 2:07:45Speaker 04

  Nice, Rogan, nice, nice.

• 2:07:48Speaker 04

  We're back. That's what we do.

• 2:07:50Speaker 03

  It's good to have you back.

• 2:07:51Joe Rogan?

  Thank you.

• 2:07:52Speaker 04

  That's what we do. Jamie, what type of music are we gonna listen to while we bong these beers?

• 2:07:57Speaker 03

  Something without a copyright.

• 2:07:58Joe Rogan?

  Born to be wild. I think we need to hear that. Jamie, give me that.

• 2:08:05Speaker 03

  Find a cover. Get a cover version.

• 2:08:07Speaker 04

  Oh wait, are we allowed to play music?

• 2:08:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, we're gonna do it on Spotify.

• 2:08:09Speaker 04

  Oh, sick.

• 2:08:09Joe Rogan?

  We release these only on Spotify so we can still go wild.

• 2:08:12Speaker 03

  No.

• 2:08:14Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that's what we do now. Didn't we disagree?

• 2:08:16Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 2:08:17Speaker 03

  Can we do clips on YouTube?

• 2:08:18Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that would clip us up.

• 2:08:19Speaker 04

  Israel.

• 2:08:23Speaker 03

  Palestine.

• 2:08:24Speaker 04

  Fuck yeah.

• 2:08:25Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 2:08:28Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 2:08:30Speaker 03

  Yeah. What a country. What a country.

• 2:08:35Joe Rogan?

  What a country. Were you guys, were you guys happy when Trump won?

• 2:08:39Speaker 04

  No.

• 2:08:41Joe Rogan?

  You wanna work for Netflix, dog?

• 2:08:43Speaker 04

  Uh, no, I, uh, it was, it was funny, cuz I've done it the last three times with Trump. The first time he won, I, I've never voted. I don't vote.

• 2:08:52Speaker 03

  Same.

• 2:08:53Speaker 04

  So I wasn't like, I, I still have that, but I didn't think I wanted Trump to win until he won the first time. And then when he won, I was like, yes.

• 2:09:01Speaker 03

  Well, my crypto went way up.

• 2:09:02Speaker 02

  I'll tell you what, me and Bobby didn't find out who won till Saturday.

• 2:09:05Speaker 03

  Bobby Kennedy?

• 2:09:06Speaker 02

  Bobby Kelly.

• 2:09:07Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 2:09:07Speaker 02

  And I'm feeling, in New York, liberal area, a calmness.

• 2:09:12Speaker 04

  Yeah, they're all chill.

• 2:09:13Speaker 02

  They're all chill.

• 2:09:14Speaker 04

  They took a day, daddy's home.

• 2:09:16Speaker 03

  Daddy's home.

• 2:09:17Speaker 04

  They took like a day to be like.

• 2:09:19Speaker 02

  Not feeling, I'm feeling a sense of kind of relief. I'm not, I'm just like, I'm just an observer.

• 2:09:24Joe Rogan?

  They gotta know they're out of control.

• 2:09:26Speaker 03

  Well, people were more mad at Tony than the whole Trump winning. It felt like fake.

• 2:09:30Speaker 04

  The comics were.

• 2:09:31Speaker 02

  That's just our world.

• 2:09:32Speaker 04

  Cowards and traitors. If you say, if you go, tell anyone, you go, Tony Hinchcliffe. Do you remember that? They, I don't know.

• 2:09:38Speaker 03

  Right, right.

• 2:09:39Speaker 04

  That's just our world.

• 2:09:40Joe Rogan?

  He's easy to hate.

• 2:09:41Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 2:09:42Joe Rogan?

  Especially if you don't know him.

• 2:09:44Speaker 02

  He's trying.

• 2:09:44Joe Rogan?

  He's trying to get hated. He likes being hated. He's a villain in a pro wrestling show.

• 2:09:48Speaker 02

  He's a heel, and the, the heels went wide and it became a different vibe.

• 2:09:52Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:09:52Speaker 02

  When, when, when, uh, it was stone cold, I think, goes in Kansas City and goes, Kansas City. Your women are all ugly and your barbecue tastes like ketchup and cardboard.

• 2:10:02Joe Rogan?

  Stone cold?

• 2:10:03Speaker 02

  I think so, yeah.

• 2:10:04Speaker 04

  He better not have.

• 2:10:05Speaker 02

  And it was just shitting on, and it was like, he's just healing, it's fun.

• 2:10:09Speaker 04

  Clearly just a down syndrome guy at wrestling.

• 2:10:11Joe Rogan?

  Healing is fun, and that's what Tony likes to do. But it's like, if you're one of those people that's not doing well and you see this guy selling out Madison Square Garden in forty minutes, you're like, what the fuck? People get mad, they get angry.

• 2:10:23Speaker 02

  David Taylor said this, he's wrote it so well, he goes, all the comics got mad, I'm not gonna say any names. You know them, the ones that got mad at Tony, because they spent eight straight years trying to be politically relevant, and none of them could really do it. And they were earnest while they were doing it. And then Tony, with some jokes, became the national talking point of politics, and it tore them apart.

• 2:10:43Joe Rogan?

  Ooh, that's, that's accurate.

• 2:10:45Speaker 03

  Tony should flip it, he goes, if you hate me, you're homophobic.

• 2:10:49Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:10:49Joe Rogan?

  But he's not gay, dude.

• 2:10:50Speaker 03

  Thank you. He's not?

• 2:10:52Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 2:10:52Speaker 04

  He's somehow against all odds.

• 2:10:54Joe Rogan?

  These are cold, these are cold beers.

• 2:10:56Speaker 04

  They're gonna, I would sit it down, sit it down. You don't need to.

• 2:10:59Speaker 02

  Jamie, you gonna let the song go with this?

• 2:11:01Joe Rogan?

  I wanna hear Born to be Wild.

• 2:11:03Speaker 04

  He wants, Jamie, Jamie, Jamie, Jamie.

• 2:11:06Speaker 03

  Jamo!

• 2:11:07Speaker 04

  Jamie, put on fucking Born to be Wild.

• 2:11:10Joe Rogan?

  Let's go.

• 2:11:10Speaker 03

  Jamie looks like the MyPillow guy now.

• 2:11:12Speaker 04

  Jamie does look like Mike Lindell.

• 2:11:14Speaker 03

  That's the name.

• 2:11:18Speaker 04

  Wait, wait on it, wait for the hook.

• 2:11:23Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 2:11:25Speaker 03

  I better start now.

• 2:11:28Speaker 04

  Oh, he's going, I can't believe I was worried about this day.

• 2:11:32Speaker 04

  Day drinking rules.

• 2:11:38Joe Rogan?

  Fire all your guns at once and.

• 2:11:41Speaker 04

  Let's get two more.

• 2:11:45Joe Rogan?

  So cold. Keep it going, Jamie.

• 2:11:47Speaker 02

  I'm gonna air a couple of these out, I'm gonna warm a couple of these out.

• 2:11:50Speaker 03

  Yeah, freezing on the throat.

• 2:11:51Speaker 04

  You gotta do it, dude.

• 2:11:52Joe Rogan?

  Yeah! You haven't finished it?

• 2:11:56Speaker 03

  So cold.

• 2:11:57Speaker 02

  No, Mark said, Mark takes ten minutes with this.

• 2:12:00Speaker 03

  I'm a liquor guy.

• 2:12:01Joe Rogan?

  This is your cold plunge.

• 2:12:02Speaker 02

  Come on.

• 2:12:27Speaker 04

  Can you imagine not being American, how fucking gay you are? You're Jaguar gay. You're fucking Jaguar gay.

• 2:12:38Joe Rogan?

  I take back all I said about the Jaguar guy.

• 2:12:40Speaker 04

  I kinda supported the Jaguar.

• 2:12:42Joe Rogan?

  I see the point now that I realize it was a big old pride meeting.

• 2:12:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:12:45Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:12:45Speaker 02

  He was speaking correctly for that environment. He was doing what Tony did.

• 2:12:48Joe Rogan?

  It's just a problem.

• 2:12:49Speaker 03

  There you go.

• 2:12:50Speaker 02

  And it was given to the wrong audience.

• 2:12:51Speaker 04

  You gotta, yeah. Fucking let go of Tony.

• 2:12:53Speaker 02

  I mean, I love him. I don't know.

• 2:12:55Joe Rogan?

  I love him too.

• 2:12:55Speaker 04

  We all love Tony.

• 2:12:57Joe Rogan?

  He's fine. Well, he gets on stage now. It's like fucking Richard Pryor just arrived. They go nuts.

• 2:13:02Speaker 04

  Which is good. That's what he needed.

• 2:13:03Joe Rogan?

  I need, I, when I was, uh, I introduced him a couple of times, like right after it was happening. The pop was fucking insane.

• 2:13:10Speaker 02

  I got legitimately distressed over comedians coming after comedians. It really bothered me.

• 2:13:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's a bummer.

• 2:13:15Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I'm like Santa Claus. I'm making a list, checking it twice.

• 2:13:18Speaker 04

  Of course, but also.

• 2:13:21Speaker 04

  How are you surprised by this? Comedians across the board are fucking dildos.

• 2:13:25Speaker 03

  I don't feel like they used to be.

• 2:13:26Speaker 04

  Yeah. We keep talking about a time that I, I've never been around when it existed.

• 2:13:30Joe Rogan?

  That's the LA Times. The LA Times in the peak, it wasn't like that.

• 2:13:33Speaker 02

  It wasn't like that. They would shit on us being dirty, but not publicly.

• 2:13:36Speaker 04

  I was never around.

• 2:13:37Joe Rogan?

  It was fun. The LA Times for everybody went woke, like 2014 to 2018. It was fun.

• 2:13:43Speaker 02

  The LA Times?

• 2:13:44Joe Rogan?

  The LA Times. When we were in LA, when the Comedy Store, when you filmed your special. You filmed your special in 2014. I came back to the store. It was popping. It was popping and it was super positive for a long time.

• 2:13:56Speaker 02

  The only thing that would get you on is you're too lowbrow. Alright, that's fair. That's just tense. But it wouldn't be a public admonishment of your material.

• 2:14:04Speaker 03

  Well, social media fucked that up.

• 2:14:06Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's also like, people don't feel like they're getting enough attention for what they're doing.

• 2:14:11Speaker 04

  Yeah, that's all there is. You see the internet and who also, like, I don't know. Again, I'll say again, I was never around when comedians were positive.

• 2:14:19Joe Rogan?

  You were in the wrong spot. If you were with us in LA.

• 2:14:22Speaker 02

  It was alt versus mainstream.

• 2:14:23Speaker 04

  I wasn't even doing it.

• 2:14:24Speaker 02

  It was alt versus main.

• 2:14:25Speaker 03

  New York was pretty positive too.

• 2:14:26Joe Rogan?

  But in New York, we hung out with the alt people.

• 2:14:28Speaker 02

  We hung out with them?

• 2:14:28Joe Rogan?

  All people like Patton and those kind of guys.

• 2:14:30Speaker 02

  They were mad at us for being better than them and we were mad at them for being witty.

• 2:14:34Joe Rogan?

  Well, the thing was, we were free. We were free. We could do the stuff still that they did when they used to do. If you go back to like Patton's earlier albums, he'd get cancelled for a lot of those bits.

• 2:14:43Speaker 03

  Oh, the retard bit?

• 2:14:44Joe Rogan?

  He's got a bunch of...

• 2:14:45Speaker 02

  But also, all we saw was...

• 2:14:46Joe Rogan?

  They're funny. They're funny.

• 2:14:47Speaker 02

  All we saw with Patton was...

• 2:14:48Speaker 03

  He was great.

• 2:14:49Speaker 02

  So tag heavy.

• 2:14:50Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well, he's a great comic. He's a great comic, and especially back then when he was free.

• 2:14:54Speaker 02

  His KFC bullshit was great. It was like, god damn, this stuff's set up? Tag, tag, tag, tag, tag, tag, tag.

• 2:15:01Joe Rogan?

  You know what I said to him once, and it's totally true? He's like the best I've ever seen at making a premise work where I would have never imagined. He'd take a premise, he'd be like, "Where's he going with this? I can't believe this is working. This is crazy."

• 2:15:12Speaker 02

  Calling his TiVo retarded?

• 2:15:14Joe Rogan?

  When his daughter called someone at Starbucks a monkey. Remember that?

• 2:15:19Speaker 03

  Yeah, I never heard that one.

• 2:15:20Joe Rogan?

  They're great bits, man. They're killer bits.

• 2:15:22Speaker 03

  He's funny.

• 2:15:23Joe Rogan?

  But you get captured, man. If you're around a bunch of other fucking cowards and everyone's like backstabbing everybody and there's this like weird compliance thing where you have to completely adhere to an ideology 100% hook, line and sinker, or you're cast out as a Nazi.

• 2:15:37Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:15:38Joe Rogan?

  You're a right-winger.

• 2:15:38Speaker 02

  But he doesn't, because his true self is, "Oh, cool, Chappelle wants me there? I'll do it."

• 2:15:42Speaker 03

  But isn't that why we got into this?

• 2:15:44Joe Rogan?

  But then he's got to respond.

• 2:15:44Speaker 03

  We got into this to be free and wacky.

• 2:15:46Speaker 02

  We got it is to hang out with your friends.

• 2:15:47Joe Rogan?

  But you gotta have a bunch of people like us. You have a bunch of where we're all friends and we all are free. And if you don't have that, you don't know what the fuck to do.

• 2:15:55Speaker 02

  Bro, I barfed in Shane's toilet and blamed that on O'Connor.

• 2:15:57Speaker 04

  I know it was you. I know it was you, you scum.

• 2:16:00Speaker 02

  O'Connor's like, "You barfed?" I'm like, "Bro, that you were so drunk, you must have done it."

• 2:16:03Speaker 04

  Yeah, I knew that was you.

• 2:16:04Speaker 02

  And then Kyle was like, "Were you here?" I'm like, "Did you get my present?" He's like, "I knew it was you." Obviously it was me.

• 2:16:11Speaker 04

  That was when we did the 999. Yeah, that was a mistake.

• 2:16:14Joe Rogan?

  Bro, when you did Skank Fest and shit in that Tupperware and they opened it up, I gagged watching the video.

• 2:16:18Speaker 03

  He shat in the video.

• 2:16:19Speaker 02

  No, no, no, that was Legion of Skanks.

• 2:16:21Joe Rogan?

  Legion of Skanks. What did I say?

• 2:16:22Speaker 02

  Skank Fest, I just shit onstage. I'm done now. That was the heights.

• 2:16:26Speaker 03

  How did you get the note in the turd?

• 2:16:28Speaker 02

  Shoved it up my butt.

• 2:16:29Speaker 03

  Whoa, Jesus, son.

• 2:16:31Speaker 02

  Shoved it up my butt, wrote in...

• 2:16:33Speaker 04

  You know Gigi Allen sucked?

• 2:16:35Speaker 02

  Oh, musically, yeah. Me too. Comedically, I've got nothing but that butt shut. That butt shut on number one.

• 2:16:42Speaker 03

  You're a prop comic now. You're shitting on stage.

• 2:16:44Joe Rogan?

  He's the only shit comic. If somebody tries to shit on stage now, they're like, oh, you're stealing from R.

• 2:16:48Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:16:49Joe Rogan?

  You can't tell, you can't take your shirt off anymore. You're Burt Kreischer. There was a bunch of guys who used to take their shirts off, right?

• 2:16:55Speaker 03

  Really?

• 2:16:55Joe Rogan?

  There has to be.

• 2:16:56Speaker 03

  You're Turd Kreischer.

• 2:16:57Joe Rogan?

  I can't believe that Burt was the only guy in the history of stand up to take his shirt off on stage.

• 2:17:00Speaker 03

  Joey definitely has.

• 2:17:01Speaker 02

  He's just the only one who did it two times in a row.

• 2:17:04Speaker 03

  Right.

• 2:17:04Speaker 02

  And then one thousand times in a row.

• 2:17:06Joe Rogan?

  Right, like, did Joey ever take his shirt off on stage? He took his whole clothes off on stage.

• 2:17:10Speaker 02

  Nope, just bottoms, just bottoms. Kept his top on always.

• 2:17:12Speaker 04

  Well, that's significantly funnier.

• 2:17:15Joe Rogan?

  There's gotta be a person other than Burt. Is it possible that Burt invented taking your shirt off when you do your set?

• 2:17:20Speaker 04

  Probably.

• 2:17:21Speaker 03

  Uh, Janet Jackson.

• 2:17:22Speaker 02

  Who would? Doesn't know this is not happening. The thing is, his last recorded set with his shirt on.

• 2:17:28Speaker 03

  Really?

• 2:17:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:17:29Speaker 03

  Pull it up.

• 2:17:30Joe Rogan?

  Well, every time he used to do the O R, he used to leave his shirt up. Cause he felt like the O R, it was like too real there. He felt bad, he took his shirt off.

• 2:17:39Speaker 04

  Minnesota, Penn State, pull up the score.

• 2:17:41Speaker 02

  Pull the score.

• 2:17:41Joe Rogan?

  Now he takes his shirt off every time he gets on stage.

• 2:17:44Speaker 02

  He has to.

• 2:17:44Joe Rogan?

  You're trapped.

• 2:17:45Speaker 02

  He gives away his shirts. He throws them to the crowd.

• 2:17:47Speaker 04

  I don't think he's even trapped doing it. I think he's.

• 2:17:49Speaker 03

  He'd definitely stop if he wanted to.

• 2:17:51Speaker 02

  Of course.

• 2:17:51Speaker 04

  But it's also like the crowd likes it, he likes it.

• 2:17:53Speaker 02

  Who cares?

• 2:17:54Joe Rogan?

  I think he feels free.

• 2:17:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:17:56Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:17:56Joe Rogan?

  What happens if he gets ripped?

• 2:17:57Speaker 03

  That'll never happen.

• 2:17:58Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah. What happens if Burt Kreischer gets ripped?

• 2:18:02Joe Rogan?

  If he, if he finds his true self.

• 2:18:03Speaker 03

  He's on the T.

• 2:18:04Speaker 02

  If he gets under three hundred pounds, it's a massive coupe.

• 2:18:08Joe Rogan?

  Coupe.

• 2:18:13Speaker 04

  Jamie, I was, I was expecting the Golden Gophers, Penn State score.

• 2:18:17Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 2:18:17Speaker 03

  I like that.

• 2:18:18Speaker 02

  Whoa.

• 2:18:19Speaker 04

  I never forgot what they did.

• 2:18:21Speaker 02

  Penn State?

• 2:18:23Speaker 03

  Never forget.

• 2:18:23Joe Rogan?

  What happened?

• 2:18:24Speaker 02

  They raped a bunch.

• 2:18:25Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's right. How crazy is that? They covered that up.

• 2:18:28Speaker 02

  A bunch.

• 2:18:28Joe Rogan?

  How crazy is it they covered that up forever?

• 2:18:30Speaker 02

  The best was Sandusky going, well, I can't just live next to a children's school? You're like, yeah, that's it.

• 2:18:36Speaker 04

  If you look, if you look into that one, though, that's one that's like, that's a conspiracy one.

• 2:18:40Speaker 02

  What do you mean?

• 2:18:41Speaker 04

  Well, that's the problem is. That's not one guy. He was, he was running, uh, it was called Second Mile Foundation. It was a bunch of kids. It was for like, it was like Boys Town in the, what's the thing from Nat, uh, Nebraska, uh?

• 2:18:54Speaker 02

  Well, whatever.

• 2:18:55Speaker 03

  So he was running like a child sex.

• 2:18:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, he was, he was running like, second mile was for like, uh, kids without. Parents who would tell.

• 2:19:04Speaker 03

  Oh, those are the best.

• 2:19:05Speaker 02

  And he was, and he, it was, yeah.

• 2:19:08Speaker 03

  Is he dead?

• 2:19:09Speaker 02

  Sandusky, no, he's, he's still kicking.

• 2:19:11Speaker 03

  Really?

• 2:19:11Joe Rogan?

  Is he really?

• 2:19:12Speaker 03

  He's in prison though.

• 2:19:13Speaker 02

  He's in prison.

• 2:19:13Speaker 03

  I'm surprised they didn't get him because they hate child fuckers.

• 2:19:16Speaker 02

  He's too old though.

• 2:19:17Joe Rogan?

  Oh, what are you talking about? They would kill him.

• 2:19:19Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:19:20Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:19:20Speaker 03

  They'll kill anybody.

• 2:19:21Joe Rogan?

  If he got in a general population, I mean, he might be protected.

• 2:19:24Speaker 02

  Yeah, he's probably protected.

• 2:19:25Speaker 03

  Maybe they're playing football.

• 2:19:26Speaker 02

  Protect our pervs.

• 2:19:29Speaker 02

  I heard, I heard somebody, somebody, uh, what's his name, Lee was, was, um.

• 2:19:33Speaker 03

  Harvey Oswald.

• 2:19:34Speaker 02

  Dating somebody who worked in prisons. She was talking about Epstein.

• 2:19:36Joe Rogan?

  Bobby Lee Harvey Oswald.

• 2:19:37Speaker 02

  And she goes, and she goes, uh, Pete Lee, and she goes.

• 2:19:39Speaker 03

  Oh, guys, guys, guys.

• 2:19:41Speaker 02

  Sorry, sorry. Anyone who's at all a celebrity, at all, screech level, gets watched a thousand minutes a day. And for Epstein to be unwatched is undoable. Also, that was under, that was under the Trump administration.

• 2:19:55Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well.

• 2:19:56Speaker 02

  When Epstein got killed.

• 2:19:57Joe Rogan?

  Listen, it didn't matter what administration, there's, that is some very powerful people. It's nothing to do with who's the president.

• 2:20:03Speaker 02

  No, I know, but he, you know.

• 2:20:05Joe Rogan?

  The fact that.

• 2:20:05Speaker 02

  Why hasn't that come out?

• 2:20:06Joe Rogan?

  Not a word, not a list, not a thing, nothing.

• 2:20:10Speaker 03

  Well, Jizz is still there.

• 2:20:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, what's going on with that?

• 2:20:12Joe Rogan?

  And I would imagine it's not going to either.

• 2:20:15Speaker 02

  No, I didn't.

• 2:20:15Speaker 03

  It's just lame.

• 2:20:16Joe Rogan?

  Everybody's like, when Trump, Trump gets in office, the Epstein. Yeah.

• 2:20:20Speaker 02

  Yeah, right, he's gonna tell it himself.

• 2:20:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:20:23Speaker 02

  It was fun. You were on an island.

• 2:20:27Speaker 03

  We would have all gotten on that plane. Let's be honest.

• 2:20:29Joe Rogan?

  And the reality is, like, they were running that for a long time, and there's probably a whole network of connected, powerful people that told you it was cool. Nothing's gonna come of it. We're gonna have a good time, we're gonna go to the island.

• 2:20:41Speaker 03

  Meet Stephen Hawking.

• 2:20:42Joe Rogan?

  No one probably told you these girls are sixteen. All you knew is there was girls there.

• 2:20:46Speaker 02

  I bet there was also some like adult sex. Designed to be the coolest thing possible. Yeah.

• 2:20:51Speaker 03

  Right.

• 2:20:52Joe Rogan?

  Same kind of situation. You get there, you get loose. First of all, celebrities do not feel comfortable unless they're around people that are like them.

• 2:20:59Speaker 02

  Celebrities, yeah.

• 2:21:00Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, if you're Jamie Foxx, like Jamie Foxx is cool. And he's around Kevin Hart, because Kevin Hart is famous too.

• 2:21:05Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:21:06Speaker 02

  He's taking a photo.

• 2:21:07Joe Rogan?

  Oh, so you know, these people that are like, super powerful world leaders, what's their fucking peer group? Other, super powerful world leaders. Then they mix in a bunch of scientists, and a bunch of like, very influential intellectual people that are interesting to hang out with.

• 2:21:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:21:22Joe Rogan?

  And then you get a free trip to an island, you're partying, and then they're telling you, it's cool, we do this all the time, and you're like, okay.

• 2:21:29Speaker 02

  All of a sudden you see Prince Edward get his dick sucked.

• 2:21:32Joe Rogan?

  You go to the fuck.

• 2:21:34Speaker 02

  I bet there was a bunch of like.

• 2:21:35Joe Rogan?

  He's got the Clinton picture up. It's like, imagine if you're Clinton, you go, hey man, what's the picture? What the fuck is that all about?

• 2:21:44Speaker 02

  I bet there was some above age sex too, where like, they're like, and like, wait, what's going on that room? Like, you're not cool.

• 2:21:50Joe Rogan?

  One hundred percent. Well, I'm sure there's a bunch of ladies, the whole thing is just.

• 2:21:54Speaker 02

  You're a dork, you just fuck nineteen year olds.

• 2:21:56Joe Rogan?

  They're all married guys. You're all in trouble. You're all busted. Also, if you're fucking a bunch of girls and you're supposed to be some guy who talks about physics. No, I don't want to listen to you about physics. I got a video of your dick. Get out of here, you creep. You like pleasure. You like dick pleasure, unlike me.

• 2:22:11Speaker 02

  I don't.

• 2:22:12Joe Rogan?

  I don't. I don't want my dick. So there's all these people that are a bunch of hypocrites that are judging a bunch of people that went to this fucking island that you would have went to too. Especially if you didn't know what the fuck was going on, and you're some dork who teaches complex mathematics at Princeton.

• 2:22:25Speaker 02

  You're looking for some money? You're looking for a funding for this? They're like, hey, there's gonna be some rich guys there. Oh shit, there's fucking kids here.

• 2:22:32Joe Rogan?

  And Epstein would fund science. He funded a bunch of different science projects.

• 2:22:37Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 2:22:38Joe Rogan?

  And then you have fucking Clinton.

• 2:22:40Speaker 02

  Well-designed trap. That would trap literally any human on earth.

• 2:22:44Joe Rogan?

  Listen, man, the Israelis know what they're doing, right, Ari?

• 2:22:47Speaker 02

  Yeah, they do know what they're do- that dude, that pager thing was.

• 2:22:50Speaker 03

  Oh, that was diabolical.

• 2:22:52Joe Rogan?

  Slick.

• 2:22:52Speaker 02

  Great. It was, that was great.

• 2:22:54Joe Rogan?

  You gotta appreciate that. That was James Bond shit. Total James Bond shit.

• 2:22:58Speaker 02

  They're gonna buy from this site. It was, what a fucking win.

• 2:23:03Joe Rogan?

  The packages.

• 2:23:04Speaker 03

  Who buys a pager?

• 2:23:05Joe Rogan?

  These guys were doing it because they saw, everything was compromised. Because in today's day, with Pegasus, the Israelis have Pegasus. They listen to any phone they want. They listen to your phone, my phone, anybody's phone they want to, anytime.

• 2:23:16Speaker 03

  Uh oh.

• 2:23:17Joe Rogan?

  Even when your phone is off, they can listen to it.

• 2:23:20Speaker 03

  Yikes.

• 2:23:21Speaker 02

  These murderers would take their phone with them to bury a body.

• 2:23:25Joe Rogan?

  Dumb asses.

• 2:23:25Speaker 02

  Leave it at home.

• 2:23:26Joe Rogan?

  Leave that phone at home. They can't help but check TikTok.

• 2:23:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:23:29Speaker 04

  You're gonna wanna watch TikTok.

• 2:23:30Joe Rogan?

  They're addicted to the reels.

• 2:23:31Speaker 03

  But the P Diddy, why can't we get anything concrete? All we really have is the hotel hallway beat ass.

• 2:23:36Joe Rogan?

  That one, that one is in the process.

• 2:23:40Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 2:23:40Joe Rogan?

  But, but hold on. He's in jail. There's a lot going on. There's a lot of lawsuits. That one is like, we're gonna find out. Jamie Foxx just recently said that P Diddy poisoned him. And that's why he got that stroke.

• 2:23:51Speaker 02

  I've heard that.

• 2:23:52Joe Rogan?

  He talked about it on stage.

• 2:23:54Speaker 02

  He said it?

• 2:23:55Joe Rogan?

  He said it.

• 2:23:56Speaker 02

  He got poisoned?

• 2:23:56Joe Rogan?

  He said it.

• 2:23:57Speaker 02

  He goes, I didn't have a heart attack because of the vaccine. It was Diddy shutting me up.

• 2:24:02Joe Rogan?

  See if you can find that. Cause he said it on stage.

• 2:24:04Speaker 02

  Diddy was poisoning people?

• 2:24:06Joe Rogan?

  Bro, I think there was some crazy shit going on.

• 2:24:09Speaker 03

  Like Cosby shit? Like drugging?

• 2:24:11Speaker 02

  Diddy wasn't even that big. It was Drake could do it.

• 2:24:14Joe Rogan?

  There's, there's alleged murders. A bunch of people that got pneumonia. A bunch of convenient people that died of pneumonia. Jamie Foxx addresses whether Diddy was responsible or 2023 hospitalization while filming Netflix special. Holy shit.

• 2:24:28Speaker 02

  Jamie Foxx has a Netflix special? Do they not care about at all stand up?

• 2:24:33Speaker 04

  Jamie Foxx is hilarious.

• 2:24:34Joe Rogan?

  Audience members, hold on, go back.

• 2:24:35Speaker 02

  Oh, I see him at clubs all the time. Working out his bits.

• 2:24:38Joe Rogan?

  What is that share?

• 2:24:39Speaker 04

  I only respect grinders.

• 2:24:40Joe Rogan?

  The audience members had varying accounts of the comedian's words. Two of them claimed that Fox said Diddy was responsible for what happened to him, that he's the one who called the FBI on Diddy, who's currently in prison awaiting trial on sex trafficking charges. A source close to Diddy insisted to Daily Mail that there is no truth to Sean Combs putting Jamie Foxx in the hospital.

• 2:25:00Speaker 03

  There's no chance that was a joke?

• 2:25:02Speaker 02

  I mean, yeah, it was a joke, but joke based on truth or not joke? Truth?

• 2:25:05Joe Rogan?

  It is possible. That's totally possible. That's totally possible, but it's also possible he was explaining while he wound up going to hospital and he hasn't talked about it since. He never talked about it. Look at this. Big homie CC, a celebrity security guard, claimed in an interview with Cam Capone News last week that Fox was poisoned by Diddy. I know Combs poisoned Jamie Foxx and Jamie Foxx reported him to the FBI because of it. Jamie Foxx reported this man because, to the FBI because of this, he claimed. So I've seen that video where that guy's talking about how Jamie Foxx.

• 2:25:37Speaker 04

  He was poisoned three times, I think, in it.

• 2:25:40Joe Rogan?

  Oh, he said it as well?

• 2:25:41Speaker 04

  He says like, why do I have cyanide in my system?

• 2:25:43Joe Rogan?

  Jesus Christ.

• 2:25:44Speaker 02

  Why do I have cyanide? Why do I have cyanide in my system?

• 2:25:48Joe Rogan?

  Jamie Foxx wipes away tears as he gives his artistic explanation of mystery illness.

• 2:25:54Speaker 02

  I love tears in a comedy special.

• 2:25:56Speaker 04

  That's how we fall into clickbait.

• 2:25:57Joe Rogan?

  What is that? Artistic explanation of mystery illness?

• 2:26:01Speaker 04

  I know, we're on a weird site and that's how you fall into clickbait.

• 2:26:03Speaker 03

  Oh, boy.

• 2:26:04Joe Rogan?

  So, I don't know if it's true. We won't know until we see the actual Jamie Foxx Netflix special, which Ari has bookmarked. He's ready to go.

• 2:26:11Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:26:11Speaker 02

  Did you see the Rosie O'Donnell, like, a bunch of, like, stuff if we're talking about it?

• 2:26:15Speaker 04

  She looks like Steve Bannon.

• 2:26:17Speaker 02

  Hers just making jokes over the years about Diddy and him going to jail and what he's doing wrong.

• 2:26:22Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 2:26:22Speaker 02

  It was like, it was like Cosby, it was like Weinstein.

• 2:26:25Joe Rogan?

  Rosie O'Donnell was joking about it?

• 2:26:26Speaker 02

  It was like, we all, they all knew about it, but you can't quite talk about it.

• 2:26:29Joe Rogan?

  Meanwhile, all these people are moving to Europe.

• 2:26:32Speaker 03

  That's right.

• 2:26:33Joe Rogan?

  How wild is that? Like, Ellen just moved to England? Like, see ya.

• 2:26:35Speaker 02

  Well, better healthcare.

• 2:26:40Joe Rogan?

  Is he talking about it here?

• 2:26:43Speaker 03

  Pull it up.

• 2:26:44Joe Rogan?

  This is December 10th.

• 2:26:46Speaker 03

  Oh, hell yeah.

• 2:26:47Joe Rogan?

  That's why I couldn't get a December date?

• 2:26:49Speaker 03

  He's a talented guy.

• 2:26:50Joe Rogan?

  What Happened Was. Wow, it's called What Happened Was?

• 2:26:53Speaker 03

  Ooh, that's gonna be a big one.

• 2:26:55Joe Rogan?

  It might be like a one-man show rather than stand-up.

• 2:26:58Speaker 02

  Dude, if they make a trailer like that, that's like...

• 2:27:01Joe Rogan?

  What Happened Was?

• 2:27:02Speaker 02

  I got drugged by Paul Patti.

• 2:27:04Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:27:04Speaker 04

  So funny.

• 2:27:05Speaker 03

  Gonna win a Grammy.

• 2:27:06Joe Rogan?

  So, I wake up and I'm sucking LeBron's dick and I don't know how I got here.

• 2:27:11Speaker 03

  Another guy scared of China.

• 2:27:12Speaker 02

  LeBron?

• 2:27:13Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:27:14Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 2:27:15Speaker 04

  Although, I, we, I was talking about with my friends earlier, I don't think LeBron, LeBron's one of the only famous guys that never got hit with a pedophile fucking accusation.

• 2:27:22Speaker 02

  He might have never fucked a child.

• 2:27:25Speaker 04

  LeBron might, LeBron might be the man.

• 2:27:28Speaker 02

  Did you ever see him fake reading Malcolm X's book?

• 2:27:31Joe Rogan?

  The best is when he does his interviews, where he shows up with a book. He's in the locker room, just can't put his book down.

• 2:27:37Speaker 04

  I defend him on that. We've all, we've all done that. I've read the first chapter of every book on earth.

• 2:27:41Speaker 02

  Have stuff on our bookshelf.

• 2:27:43Joe Rogan?

  I went over to Callan's house once and he had, uh, something like Catcher in the Rye sitting on his, uh, coffee table. I go, you're not reading that. I go, you have that out there when girls come over. He goes, you're right. He goes, "How did you know?" I go, "You scumbag." I go, "That's like so obvious."

• 2:27:58Speaker 02

  You would've thought that guy could be a phony.

• 2:28:00Speaker 03

  It's also a serial killer book. Every serial killer had it.

• 2:28:03Joe Rogan?

  Calvin was so nutty when I first, when I first, um, visited him, when I first started hanging out with him. He didn't have a lock on his door and someone broke his doorknob off and he left it off. And so like, he didn't have anything. He had like clothes and a couple of books that he pretended to read. And a lady, a homeless lady, walked into his apartment while he was sleeping and was cooking breakfast. And, uh, he goes downstairs, he smells something cooking. Goes downstairs, there's a homeless lady in his kitchen cooking. She's like, "You got it going on, honey. Look at all the stuff you got here." And, and he's like, "Uh, you have to, you have to leave."

• 2:28:35Speaker 03

  What?

• 2:28:36Joe Rogan?

  Like Calvin was wild.

• 2:28:37Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 2:28:38Joe Rogan?

  He didn't even have a doorknob. His doorknob was broken up. There was a hole in the doorknob area where you could just push open the door. So he would just shut that door and go to sleep in Venice.

• 2:28:47Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 2:28:48Joe Rogan?

  In Venice. I was like, "Dude, you're gonna die."

• 2:28:51Speaker 03

  He's gotta be careful because squatters, they're hard to get rid of.

• 2:28:53Joe Rogan?

  Well, back then, there was no squatters. There was none of that back then. I don't know when all that shit started happening, when people decided they could move into people's houses, but it wasn't a common thing back then.

• 2:29:02Speaker 03

  Israel. They have laws, you can't get rid of those people.

• 2:29:06Joe Rogan?

  I know, it's crazy, especially, uh, in some states.

• 2:29:09Speaker 02

  Stanhope, I heard a story of Stanhope, where he had like homeless people on his, on his like porch. He's like, "Whatever."

• 2:29:12Joe Rogan?

  Oh, well, the homeless said he stabbed the guy.

• 2:29:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, and he goes, "Yeah, whatever, just don't be weird, but it's fine." And then he comes up, the chick had stabbed the dude, he goes, "You guys gotta go."

• 2:29:20Joe Rogan?

  What?

• 2:29:21Speaker 02

  And they go, "No, no, we're cool." He goes, "It's too much, you guys, you gotta go."

• 2:29:23Joe Rogan?

  She had blood. He videotaped her with blood on her hand and she's standing, staring at her hand, she goes, "I'm a cunt, I'm a whore, I'm a cunt, I'm a whore." She was sounding like crazy. She was schizophrenic.

• 2:29:33Speaker 02

  And he's like, "Nah, you're just a cunt."

• 2:29:36Joe Rogan?

  She was completely schizophrenic. These people were like camped out.

• 2:29:40Speaker 03

  Holy moly.

• 2:29:41Joe Rogan?

  Stanhope had a house in Venice that had the American flag painted on the side of the house. The whole house was the American flag.

• 2:29:46Speaker 03

  That's fun.

• 2:29:47Joe Rogan?

  It was hilarious. And we parted at his house multiple times.

• 2:29:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:29:51Joe Rogan?

  And he was just such a silly boy. And he let these people just sleep in his, "I'm like, you letting these people just sleep there? Do you know them?" He goes, "Yeah, they're good friends."

• 2:29:57Speaker 03

  Venice is wild.

• 2:29:58Speaker 02

  Good friends.

• 2:29:59Speaker 03

  Venice is creepy. There's something weird about that area.

• 2:30:01Joe Rogan?

  He loved it. It's perfect for Stanhope.

• 2:30:04Speaker 02

  It is perfect for him.

• 2:30:04Joe Rogan?

  He fit in like OJ's glove.

• 2:30:08Joe Rogan?

  It was perfect.

• 2:30:11Speaker 03

  Is he still in Bisbee?

• 2:30:13Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he's the king of Bisbee. Why would he leave?

• 2:30:15Speaker 03

  Didn't his house catch on fire or something?

• 2:30:17Joe Rogan?

  You know another one.

• 2:30:18Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:30:18Joe Rogan?

  You can live in a teepee out there. It never gets hot, never gets cold.

• 2:30:21Speaker 03

  Really?

• 2:30:22Joe Rogan?

  It gets hot, doesn't get too cold.

• 2:30:23Speaker 03

  Alright, boys. Do it for America. Yeah. America versus Israel. Oh shit. That's the end of that. Israel's done.

• 2:30:38Speaker 03

  Not bad, not bad.

• 2:30:40Joe Rogan?

  Did you see Tony play drums on stage?

• 2:30:42Speaker 02

  With Jelly Roll?

• 2:30:42Joe Rogan?

  With Jelly Roll?

• 2:30:43Speaker 02

  That ruled.

• 2:30:43Joe Rogan?

  He played Simple Man. He played drums. He killed it.

• 2:30:46Speaker 02

  That fucking ruled.

• 2:30:47Joe Rogan?

  He killed it. Jelly Roll's the fucking man.

• 2:30:50Speaker 02

  Jelly Roll.

• 2:30:53Speaker 03

  Good guy.

• 2:30:53Joe Rogan?

  He's the man. He was out here the other day. Hangs out at the club.

• 2:30:56Speaker 02

  I, uh, I DM'd him, like, "Hey buddy, we've never, like, really hung out. We should, like, everybody I know likes you, like, like, let's hang out. If you're in New York, come hang out." And he was like, "Yeah, dude, that's great. Here's my number. Text me." And he gave me a fake number.

• 2:31:08Speaker 03

  No. You got jelly. No.

• 2:31:12Joe Rogan?

  I was like, "Well played." Why would he give you a fake number? I don't know.

• 2:31:16Speaker 03

  He's gonna see you.

• 2:31:17Joe Rogan?

  That fucking ruled. He probably gave you an old number and he forgot because he was high.

• 2:31:21Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 2:31:22Joe Rogan?

  I doubt he did that. I thought it was cool as shit. I doubt. I was like, "Hey, man, it's alright."

• 2:31:27Speaker 02

  Nothing. I'm like,

• 2:31:28Joe Rogan?

  I severely doubt.

• 2:31:29Speaker 02

  Nice.

• 2:31:29Joe Rogan?

  Severely doubt.

• 2:31:31Speaker 02

  Yeah, he wouldn't do that, but that is very funny.

• 2:31:33Joe Rogan?

  That is very funny. It's very funny.

• 2:31:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:31:35Joe Rogan?

  Especially if he do it to you.

• 2:31:36Speaker 02

  I took, uh, the Kid Rock watch story last time, right?

• 2:31:39Joe Rogan?

  Oh, it ruled. That was great.

• 2:31:40Speaker 02

  That was good. He gave us a fake watch and left. And he was like, "I want you to have this." Fake diamond. Me and my friends fought about it for twenty minutes. I was like, "Oh, this is from Amazon. This is a five dollar watch." He wore it all night to trick us.

• 2:31:52Speaker 03

  How crazy was the, uh, the garden with all those guys?

• 2:31:55Joe Rogan?

  It was crazy.

• 2:31:55Speaker 03

  Kid Rock, uh, Dana White.

• 2:31:58Joe Rogan?

  It was great.

• 2:31:59Speaker 03

  John Jones bowing to Trump. It was like the Gladiator, bowing to the emperor.

• 2:32:02Joe Rogan?

  The pop when Trump walked in the building was like, you had to be there to understand. It was like, it, it always is a huge pop when he shows up every time. But this was like triple that. It was a five minute standing ovation.

• 2:32:14Speaker 03

  Jesus.

• 2:32:16Joe Rogan?

  Five minutes.

• 2:32:17Speaker 02

  Wow. It is crazy that we've lost sight of like, a president-elect is coming in. This is awesome. We've just lost sight of like what that means.

• 2:32:25Speaker 03

  President.

• 2:32:26Joe Rogan?

  Hey man, I can only judge someone by how I experience them. And I like the guy, he's fun.

• 2:32:32Speaker 03

  But it's funny he shit on you and then you, he comes on. I like that you can still.

• 2:32:36Joe Rogan?

  He also.

• 2:32:36Speaker 03

  Basically.

• 2:32:37Speaker 02

  He barely shit on.

• 2:32:38Joe Rogan?

  He said something kinda crazy though, it was like, I wonder how loud I'm gonna get booed at the UFC like out of all the places.

• 2:32:46Speaker 03

  Maybe at the mothership.

• 2:32:48Speaker 02

  But also, also Shane at Kill Tony MSG. Which is shitting on, as Trump, shitting on Rogan. And then Rogan coming out, it was so funny, watching from the sideline of shit, they all knew. And then you come up, the applause, and Shane's like, okay, that means he's here, I don't have to turn, and just going.

• 2:33:07Speaker 03

  What a great guy.

• 2:33:08Joe Rogan?

  What a great guy.

• 2:33:09Speaker 02

  Slowly. That's what Trump would do.

• 2:33:11Speaker 03

  Yes, that was great.

• 2:33:12Speaker 02

  Great guy, I always loved him, I'm scared.

• 2:33:14Joe Rogan?

  There's nothing weirder than being a part of a presidential election.

• 2:33:17Speaker 02

  It's real weird.

• 2:33:18Speaker 03

  Weird.

• 2:33:19Joe Rogan?

  Nothing weirder, especially like, Ari, you were here, the fuck, you were in like episode three or some shit. You know, of this podcast. Imagine like this fucking thing somehow or another affects.

• 2:33:30Speaker 02

  Like glomming onto this?

• 2:33:31Joe Rogan?

  The thing that we used to do in my spare bedroom.

• 2:33:35Speaker 02

  I was just talking to somebody at like an airport or something like, did he do it from his house? I'm like, no, he used to, and then he had enough porn stars on that go like.

• 2:33:42Joe Rogan?

  It was mostly Andy Dick. I didn't want Andy Dick at my house. And then there was a few other people, I was like, we have to have a location. And then we did it at Red Band's for a little while, but that was too complicated.

• 2:33:52Speaker 02

  First one to get a studio.

• 2:33:52Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:33:53Speaker 03

  Whoa, Fleshlight was in there.

• 2:33:55Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I just, I was like, I gotta get out of my house, I have young kids, and I have too many weirdos coming over the house.

• 2:34:00Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:34:01Joe Rogan?

  Like I gotta.

• 2:34:01Speaker 02

  Me alone shouldn't be a trap.

• 2:34:03Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you were over there before the podcast, bitch. But it was like, one of those things where I was like, okay, I think it's growing, so I probably just like, it's accept it and move on. The next move's the ranch boys.

• 2:34:14Speaker 02

  I can't wait.

• 2:34:15Joe Rogan?

  Oh, I've been looking, I've been looking, we're gonna do something crazy.

• 2:34:18Speaker 02

  Can't wait that.

• 2:34:19Joe Rogan?

  We're gonna have a helicopter pad.

• 2:34:21Speaker 03

  Let's shoot some guns.

• 2:34:22Joe Rogan?

  And, oh, we're gonna have that, I'm gonna make a tactical range, like blown out cars and shit.

• 2:34:26Speaker 02

  Let's blow up a cow.

• 2:34:27Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I'm looking at locations.

• 2:34:28Speaker 02

  They're trying to fight Russia, let's hurry up.

• 2:34:30Joe Rogan?

  I don't really think Putin's that stupid, I think he's gonna realize what's going on, and I think they're, they're probably working this out. Alex Jones said that Trump is having secret meetings.

• 2:34:38Speaker 02

  At Mar-a-Lago?

• 2:34:39Joe Rogan?

  At Mar-a-Lago, I hope it's true. I hope it's true, they're trying to come up with some sort of a. Zelensky tried to come on.

• 2:34:46Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 2:34:47Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, they tried to get Zelensky on, I was like, what are you talking about?

• 2:34:50Speaker 02

  Do you, when you get an offer for somebody, they must come at your bookers or whatever. Do you go, do you like stop and like, hold on, let me think about this, whether I want to be part of the story or not, whether it'll be interesting or not?

• 2:35:01Joe Rogan?

  Well, I wanted to stay out of the presidential election shit.

• 2:35:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:35:04Joe Rogan?

  It's gross, because I feel like I had to. I feel like this is so nuts. This is so nuts. When that Tim Walz guy, that guy's, it's so nuts that that guy was gonna be the vice president.

• 2:35:14Speaker 04

  Pretending to be his head coach.

• 2:35:15Joe Rogan?

  You're telling, you're telling me this whole thing's fake then? You're telling me you don't care if someone's a liar. You don't care if they lied about their military rank, where they served. You don't care if they lie about being an assistant. You don't care if they lie about Tiananmen Square. There's too many things. This is so crazy. You, you would get fired if you were a assistant manager at a fucking oil changing company. You would get, Jiffy Lube would fire you.

• 2:35:37Speaker 02

  So let me ask you a question though. In two years from now, there's no more Kamala, there's no more Democrats for a while. We're deep into the next thing. Can all these people now make fun of the current president?

• 2:35:48Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, they should be able to.

• 2:35:49Speaker 02

  They should be able to.

• 2:35:49Joe Rogan?

  They should be able to. You, you should always be able to make fun of people.

• 2:35:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:35:53Joe Rogan?

  And if Trump does something stupid, we're gonna be right here making fun of him.

• 2:35:55Speaker 02

  Great.

• 2:35:56Joe Rogan?

  It doesn't, it doesn't mean you don't like the guy.

• 2:35:58Speaker 04

  The best chance to avoid World War III, which is

• 2:36:01Joe Rogan?

  Also JD Vance, Vivek, Tulsi Gabbard, all these people, RFK Junior, all these people are very promising.

• 2:36:06Speaker 02

  The anti-war lady Tulsi Gabbard going to Trump and the pro-war guy Dick Cheney going the other way is like, that should kinda tell you what you need to know about international wars.

• 2:36:16Joe Rogan?

  How about the fact that the left was like openly embracing the fact that Dick Cheney avoided Kamala?

• 2:36:22Speaker 02

  They should be like, get out of here.

• 2:36:23Joe Rogan?

  Or endorsed Kamala, rather. They weren't going like, what?

• 2:36:26Speaker 02

  That's like Epstein endorsing you.

• 2:36:27Joe Rogan?

  But no one was standing back and say, this guy's responsible for like, how many fucking people died in Iraq?

• 2:36:31Speaker 04

  You ever see Vice, the movie about him?

• 2:36:33Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:36:34Speaker 04

  Kinda made me a fan.

• 2:36:35Speaker 02

  About who?

• 2:36:36Speaker 04

  It was supposed to, it was supposed to make you not like him.

• 2:36:39Joe Rogan?

  Really? Made you a fan?

• 2:36:40Speaker 04

  Probably. I've, Cheney, have I talked about this before?

• 2:36:43Speaker 03

  No, he was a cool guy in that movie.

• 2:36:44Speaker 04

  In the movie, there's a part where he's like a drunk piece of shit.

• 2:36:48Speaker 02

  Who? Who, who?

• 2:36:49Speaker 04

  Dick Cheney.

• 2:36:49Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 2:36:49Speaker 04

  He's doing like power, he's working on power lines in fucking Wyoming or some shit. And he's, he's just getting in drunk bar fights and then his wife, Lynn Cheney is like, are you gonna be a loser your whole life?

• 2:37:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:37:01Speaker 04

  And he's like, no.

• 2:37:02Speaker 02

  The Howard Stern movie.

• 2:37:03Speaker 04

  No, I won't. And then he conquers the world.

• 2:37:06Speaker 03

  Right, and kills a million people.

• 2:37:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but is that what happened?

• 2:37:09Speaker 02

  Remember when he shot his friend? By the way, Dick Cheney, no, no offense, I love you, you think you're great. Remember when he shot his friend?

• 2:37:17Speaker 02

  Yeah, he shot him in the face.

• 2:37:18Joe Rogan?

  Oh yeah, shot him in the face. His friend apologized.

• 2:37:21Speaker 02

  Baller beast.

• 2:37:22Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, pretty crazy.

• 2:37:23Speaker 02

  Beast, that's right.

• 2:37:24Joe Rogan?

  That's a lot of pop. Sorry, I was in the wrong place, the wrong time.

• 2:37:27Speaker 02

  That's on me. You shot me in the fucking face? That's on me.

• 2:37:30Joe Rogan?

  I should be aware that you're retarded. And that you were drunk, you had a shotgun. Jesus.

• 2:37:36Speaker 02

  That's Randy Marsh saying, "I'm not against big toilet paper."

• 2:37:41Speaker 02

  No, we love Dick Cheney.

• 2:37:43Joe Rogan?

  Republicans buy sneakers too.

• 2:37:44Speaker 02

  What?

• 2:37:45Joe Rogan?

  What?

• 2:37:46Speaker 02

  Sneakers. Sneakers is real close to the wrong word.

• 2:37:48Joe Rogan?

  That was close.

• 2:37:49Speaker 02

  That was real close.

• 2:37:50Speaker 04

  Sounded like it's Snickers.

• 2:37:52Joe Rogan?

  Sneakers. We need something else. Sneaker, please. Let's mix it up. What's another good patriotic song?

• 2:37:57Speaker 02

  Hold on, hold on. Oh, oh, the Hulk Hogan America song.

• 2:38:00Speaker 04

  That's actually great.

• 2:38:01Joe Rogan?

  That's a good one. Let's go with that one. Is that "Fuck Yeah"?

• 2:38:04Speaker 02

  No, it's not a "Fuck Yeah," but it's great. It's, it's, it's probably the number one song for a record.

• 2:38:10Joe Rogan?

  How crazy is it they had Hulk Hogan rip his shirt off at a political rally?

• 2:38:14Speaker 02

  And how could you not be behind it?

• 2:38:15Joe Rogan?

  It's wacky time. Wow.

• 2:38:17Speaker 04

  Damn, this does hit.

• 2:38:20Joe Rogan?

  Oh, man.

• 2:38:21Speaker 02

  I forgot it!

• 2:38:21Joe Rogan?

  It's my childhood.

• 2:38:25Speaker 02

  Simone's getting hard.

• 2:38:27Joe Rogan?

  Damn, he's brown.

• 2:38:28Speaker 04

  Let's get his tits sucked.

• 2:38:29Joe Rogan?

  Look how brown he was. Is that brown face?

• 2:38:41Joe Rogan?

  That was me as a mascot. Who sang this? Who sang this?

• 2:38:45Speaker 02

  Him!

• 2:38:46Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 2:38:47Speaker 02

  This Hulk. No.

• 2:38:49Speaker 04

  It's crazy photo.

• 2:38:50Joe Rogan?

  It says 21 million views.

• 2:38:54Joe Rogan?

  21 million. 21 million views. That's insane. We can make it 22.

• 2:38:58Speaker 02

  Rick Derringer. He's a guy.

• 2:39:00Speaker 04

  Hey. Catch friend the ride.

• 2:39:06Joe Rogan?

  Okay, let's go. Let's go.

• 2:39:08Speaker 02

  Mark?

• 2:39:09Joe Rogan?

  Three, two, one, go!

• 2:39:12Speaker 02

  You better do it all, Mark.

• 2:39:15Speaker 04

  Do it, Mark.

• 2:39:16Speaker 02

  Do it, Mark.

• 2:39:22Speaker 04

  Come on, Mark.

• 2:39:25Speaker 02

  You better finish that.

• 2:39:26Speaker 04

  Mark, think about America.

• 2:39:27Speaker 03

  Just keep pouring.

• 2:39:28Speaker 04

  Think about America.

• 2:39:30Joe Rogan?

  Think about America. Do it to stop the war in Ukraine.

• 2:39:35Speaker 02

  Alright, that's good. Not bad, Mark, not bad. Best one yet, best one yet, best one yet.

• 2:39:39Joe Rogan?

  Now, take what's left in mind and you drink it.

• 2:39:42Speaker 03

  Oh shit, the jizz bucket.

• 2:39:44Joe Rogan?

  Like a dirty person.

• 2:39:45Speaker 02

  That's a real one. That's a real American.

• 2:39:47Speaker 04

  Yeah, that might have been the best one.

• 2:39:48Joe Rogan?

  You drink the backwash.

• 2:39:50Speaker 02

  Oh, me?

• 2:39:51Joe Rogan?

  You're the opener.

• 2:39:52Speaker 02

  Don't be a coward.

• 2:39:53Joe Rogan?

  Don't be a coward, drink the backwash. Don't be a coward.

• 2:39:56Speaker 04

  No, no, no, don't.

• 2:39:56Joe Rogan?

  Do it, do it, do it, do it.

• 2:39:58Speaker 02

  You were close, do it. Fuck it, that's over. You're on me for a second, Shane, stop me.

• 2:40:02Joe Rogan?

  Wow, it's not, it doesn't even reach his mouth.

• 2:40:04Speaker 02

  He should have to do it close.

• 2:40:05Joe Rogan?

  It doesn't even reach his mouth.

• 2:40:06Speaker 02

  I'll do it, I don't give a fuck.

• 2:40:07Speaker 04

  Let's go!

• 2:40:09Speaker 03

  Oh, you're sick.

• 2:40:12Speaker 04

  You hate to say it.

• 2:40:12Speaker 02

  I have one of these in my studio for-

• 2:40:13Speaker 03

  That's almost like jizz.

• 2:40:14Speaker 02

  For my podcast, and I go, this is close to-

• 2:40:16Joe Rogan?

  That's almost like to be drank.

• 2:40:19Speaker 04

  Talk him into doing something.

• 2:40:20Joe Rogan?

  That's basically pre-com.

• 2:40:22Speaker 02

  Okay, you guys gotta shut up for a second?

• 2:40:24Joe Rogan?

  Pre-com.

• 2:40:24Speaker 02

  Cause you're all looking really hot right now.

• 2:40:28Speaker 04

  They're better than a volcano.

• 2:40:29Joe Rogan?

  I like how you're diverse.

• 2:40:32Speaker 04

  If there's a volcano, I'm sucking one of you.

• 2:40:35Speaker 03

  Volcano, that's all good.

• 2:40:36Speaker 04

  Sucking a volcano.

• 2:40:37Joe Rogan?

  Oh no, I'm about to erupt. Bro, imagine living near Yellowstone, just knowing one day that baby's gonna go.

• 2:40:44Speaker 04

  As soon as it does, I'm hitting the fucking-

• 2:40:46Joe Rogan?

  There might be the spot to be though, you might wanna be like right there, instead of starve to death in Maine.

• 2:40:51Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:40:51Speaker 03

  Yeah, it'd be a funny episode of the show.

• 2:40:53Speaker 02

  Do you remember the second Yosemite?

• 2:40:55Joe Rogan?

  Are we doing the show in Mar-a-Lago?

• 2:40:56Speaker 02

  Well, we were gonna, but you said, "I don't wanna influence an election."

• 2:41:02Joe Rogan?

  We were gonna- I changed my mind after they shot at him.

• 2:41:05Speaker 03

  That changed everything.

• 2:41:07Speaker 02

  Who do you think shot at him? CIA? This one guy?

• 2:41:11Speaker 04

  No, and I think they, what's the saying, they fucking, they got rid of the goalie?

• 2:41:16Joe Rogan?

  What's that saying?

• 2:41:16Speaker 02

  Pull the goalie?

• 2:41:17Speaker 04

  Uh, they pulled the goalie on that one, uh, defense wise, like the...

• 2:41:20Joe Rogan?

  Uh.

• 2:41:21Speaker 04

  I think they let a boy go.

• 2:41:22Joe Rogan?

  That boy was in a BlackRock commercial.

• 2:41:23Speaker 02

  I just corrected you on sports.

• 2:41:24Speaker 04

  That is a weird one.

• 2:41:25Joe Rogan?

  He was in a BlackRock commercial and there's a cellphone data record. See if you can find this, I don't fuck this up. There's a cellphone data record of a phone that came from an area that's near the FBI headquarters, back and forth to this kid's home. This kid's home was professionally scrubbed.

• 2:41:44Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:41:45Joe Rogan?

  No silverware, no nothing. They, they, hold on, I'm not done.

• 2:41:48Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:41:49Joe Rogan?

  They cremated him 10 days after the assassination attempt. There's no toxicology reports. If you find, uh, if, there's no press conference. If someone tries to shoot a guy who eventually winds up being the president-elect, you should at least find out if this guy was drugged? Was he on crack? Like, what was he doing?

• 2:42:08Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 2:42:09Joe Rogan?

  You would do that. You would do that, then you release it publicly. He was under the influence of psychotic drugs. You would do something, you would wanna know. At least, there should be an account of how this happened.

• 2:42:20Speaker 04

  Probably on SSRIs.

• 2:42:21Joe Rogan?

  The only thing, for sure.

• 2:42:23Speaker 04

  Definitely.

• 2:42:23Joe Rogan?

  The only thing that went wrong, or the only thing that did happen, rather, was the head of Secret Service, that lady, the secret, the so, the, whatever it is.

• 2:42:31Speaker 04

  She was great.

• 2:42:32Joe Rogan?

  Secret Service lady, I'm a little drunk. The Secret Service lady, that lady got fired. But she didn't wanna get fired, she tried to keep her job.

• 2:42:38Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:42:38Joe Rogan?

  She actually, like, tried to explain, and the dumbest explanation, there was a sloped roof, so she could have slo-

• 2:42:44Speaker 04

  Which there wasn't.

• 2:42:45Joe Rogan?

  But, but also, there was a sloped roof where the other snipers were on, it was more sloped.

• 2:42:49Speaker 04

  Sloped roof, so what?

• 2:42:50Joe Rogan?

  So it was too dangerous to have snipers up there.

• 2:42:52Speaker 04

  Oh.

• 2:42:53Joe Rogan?

  Someone who regularly visited Crook's home-

• 2:42:55Speaker 04

  But it wasn't.

• 2:42:56Joe Rogan?

  -and work also visited a building in DC located in Gallery Place. This is the same vicinity as an FBI office on June 26, 2023. Whose device is that?

• 2:43:07Speaker 04

  Hold on, devil's advocate. I've lived in DC, I've lived in the area. There's FBI stuff everywhere, you're, you're, how, how close is, oh, wow, that close?

• 2:43:15Speaker 02

  Devil's advocate, he shot a person.

• 2:43:17Speaker 04

  That close?

• 2:43:17Joe Rogan?

  Right, for someone-

• 2:43:18Speaker 04

  I pull back, I pull back. That's the same block.

• 2:43:19Joe Rogan?

  I think, I think the accusation was that they'd done it more than one time.

• 2:43:24Speaker 04

  Fuck.

• 2:43:25Speaker 03

  Wait, DC?

• 2:43:27Joe Rogan?

  Oh, there it is, there it is, there it is, there it is, there it is. Hold on, hold on.

• 2:43:30Speaker 03

  Sorry.

• 2:43:30Joe Rogan?

  We found a device linked to Crook's work that traveled to Butler, Pennsylvania on July 4th and July 8th.

• 2:43:37Speaker 03

  Sorry.

• 2:43:37Joe Rogan?

  Device stopped all activity on July 12th. On August 30th, 2023, one device linked Crook's visited Alguini Arms. So this is the place where he got guns. So they tracked all of his phones and the people that visited him. So someone, there it is. This stupid fucking watch. So someone visited. Does that mean that it was the FBI that did something? No, it doesn't necessarily. It could be anything. It could be just a person that randomly happened to be there that went to that area.

• 2:44:11Joe Rogan?

  But it's kind of weird that they're not showing you the toxicology. It's kind of weird. There's no press conference. The guy tried to shoot. The guy was a president for four years and everyone's making like it's no big deal. And then when they asked him, they asked Kamala Harris about Secret Service protection. She's like, a lot of people don't feel safe. You know, trans people don't feel safe. It was like, there was like this crazy take on it that was so nuts. Like, what are you talking about? That could be you. Crazy people are out there. You have to protect all of us. High-profile people that are running for president. Do you believe in democracy? You have to protect them. You can't say everyone feels in danger. No one feels safe. I don't feel safe. Immigrants don't feel safe. Trump supports them. He got shot.

• 2:44:51Speaker 02

  Shot in the fucking head.

• 2:44:52Joe Rogan?

  And that was the guy behind him that got killed.

• 2:44:53Speaker 03

  Miracle. It hit his ear. Yeah, he turned weirdly and it worked.

• 2:44:57Joe Rogan?

  It makes me feel like we're in a movie.

• 2:44:59Speaker 04

  Wasn't JFK yesterday?

• 2:45:01Speaker 03

  Is that right?

• 2:45:02Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:45:02Speaker 03

  Sixty-three?

• 2:45:03Speaker 04

  Twenty-second.

• 2:45:04Joe Rogan?

  Is that what it is?

• 2:45:05Speaker 04

  Yeah, I think that was yesterday.

• 2:45:07Joe Rogan?

  Whoa.

• 2:45:07Speaker 03

  And does RFK have security yet?

• 2:45:09Joe Rogan?

  Oh, he's got a shitload of security.

• 2:45:11Speaker 03

  Oh, there you go.

• 2:45:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he's got a shitload of security.

• 2:45:12Speaker 02

  Tony has security. Of course RFK has it.

• 2:45:15Speaker 04

  Well, Tony has security before he needed security.

• 2:45:18Speaker 02

  Tony was like, isn't it cool they have security?

• 2:45:22Speaker 02

  They each have a throne.

• 2:45:24Joe Rogan?

  They each have a throne.

• 2:45:25Speaker 02

  I'm shitting on too much.

• 2:45:26Joe Rogan?

  Swords.

• 2:45:27Speaker 02

  For the raccons. Tony rules. I love Tony. I know, I've just, I think I've been nothing but negative so far.

• 2:45:34Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 2:45:35Speaker 02

  Somebody brings up Tony, I'm like, shut up.

• 2:45:36Speaker 03

  We're goofing.

• 2:45:37Joe Rogan?

  It is kinda crazy though, that someone tried to kill him and it's kind of like an afterthought. No one cares about it anymore.

• 2:45:43Speaker 03

  It's strange.

• 2:45:44Joe Rogan?

  It would have been the next Lee Harvey Oswald. If that guy shot Trump and killed him and then they killed that guy, that would have been it. We would have never known. It would have been just-

• 2:45:52Speaker 02

  Never known.

• 2:45:53Joe Rogan?

  It would have been just like the JFK assassination. Ten years from now, fucking Yanis Pappas would be on some late night talk show with a video of the assassination. No one saw before. Just like Dick Gregory did. Somebody would, you know, Dick Gregory was a comic.

• 2:46:08Speaker 02

  Dick Gregory, I've been researching him a little bit. Rules. Gave up his whole comedy career.

• 2:46:14Speaker 03

  For activism.

• 2:46:15Speaker 02

  Said, "I can't be a fucking accepted black while nobody else is."

• 2:46:19Speaker 04

  Playing cool ass music?

• 2:46:22Speaker 04

  Oh, is this fucker?

• 2:46:23Joe Rogan?

  What is it?

• 2:46:23Speaker 03

  Are you ringing?

• 2:46:24Speaker 04

  Watching you weirdo.

• 2:46:26Speaker 03

  Oh, what the fuck?

• 2:46:30Joe Rogan?

  Jamie was setting us up for something, I'm like, what the fuck is going on?

• 2:46:33Speaker 02

  I don't know what you're talking about.

• 2:46:34Joe Rogan?

  I was like, Jamie, what is this? That's hilarious, that's your ringer?

• 2:46:38Speaker 02

  No, no, no, it was an ad on a fucking-

• 2:46:40Joe Rogan?

  Precocious bastard.

• 2:46:41Speaker 03

  Oh, you were watching something while pissing?

• 2:46:43Speaker 02

  I was looking at sports scores.

• 2:46:44Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, Dick Gregory's one of those guys and I'm mad that I didn't go to one of his shows. Cause he had a show in New York and I was thinking of traveling and going to see it and I didn't go to it.

• 2:46:52Speaker 02

  I saw him at the DC Improv, oh, no, DC Improv, John X ran a room and I saw him there and it was three and a half hours long.

• 2:46:58Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 2:46:59Joe Rogan?

  Whoa.

• 2:46:59Speaker 02

  And it was, he gave up his whole career, "Cause I can't be an accepted black man while none of my cohorts are accepted." Fuck this.

• 2:47:07Speaker 03

  What do you mean?

• 2:47:07Speaker 02

  He goes, "I can't be accepted by whites where nobody else is." In the sixties. This is a long time ago.

• 2:47:13Joe Rogan?

  Different time.

• 2:47:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:47:14Speaker 03

  Cosby was accepted.

• 2:47:14Speaker 02

  And he goes, "I know I'm a-"

• 2:47:15Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but a different time.

• 2:47:16Speaker 02

  I know, he goes, "I'm not gonna be that."

• 2:47:18Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:47:18Speaker 02

  And he wrote a book called, called The N Word.

• 2:47:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:47:21Speaker 02

  And, uh, but actual, and then now people are getting banned for suggesting it because of the title.

• 2:47:27Speaker 03

  Right.

• 2:47:27Speaker 02

  But that guy underrated how crazy and influential and intelligent he was.

• 2:47:32Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 2:47:33Speaker 02

  And funny.

• 2:47:34Joe Rogan?

  Hundred percent, that's the whole thing about him getting that video. So he got that film from Time Magazine. Time Magazine had that film for 12 years.

• 2:47:42Speaker 02

  What film?

• 2:47:43Joe Rogan?

  The film of the Zapruder assassin, the, the Zapruder version of the assassination. So Adrian Zapruder was filming with a Super 8 camera. And he catches Kennedy's head exploding and his head going back into the right. And that threw this giant monkey wrench into the whole narrative of that he was shot from the schoolbook depository. Because his head goes back into the left from a bullet that's supposed to come from behind him? It doesn't make any sense. And then on top of that, there's a moment where he grabs his neck, which is the entry hole. He got shot in the neck, so someone shot him from the front. But in the Bethesda, Maryland autopsy report, that's a tracheotomy hole.

• 2:48:24Speaker 02

  Ah.

• 2:48:25Joe Rogan?

  In the, uh, but, but hold on, in the Dallas version of it, when the, when they got his body in Dallas, they said it was an entry hole. So there's a lot of contradictory evidence. This is all in, David Lifton wrote a book called Best Evidence that turned me into a fucking loon.

• 2:48:40Speaker 02

  And so Da, and so, I love how you push back on Trump with that. That was baller.

• 2:48:44Joe Rogan?

  Oh, the Kennedy assassination?

• 2:48:45Speaker 02

  You're like, how much he really goes, I read enough. He goes, how much? I, plenty. How much, though? I love, more than half or less than half?

• 2:48:53Joe Rogan?

  Well, he wanted to win and I didn't want to push too hard.

• 2:48:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:48:56Joe Rogan?

  Right? I'm like, I'm trying to like have a conversation with this guy where I'm gonna ask, one of the big things was like, you did ramp up the budget deficit. You, you did ranch up, you, you ramped up what we owe. Like, but what he explained that kind of makes sense is that what he was doing with, uh, getting rid of regulations, more American oil, what, it was gonna stimulate the economy. We're on our way to overcoming it. Then we got hit by COVID. Okay, that's reasonable. Because he did, the deficit did increase significantly during his term because of tariffs, because of a bunch, so I was trying to figure out, like, I don't understand that stuff. I just know what I read about it. I did my best to try to like, what's like a very important aspect of what he's talking about? We're gonna bring the economy back, okay.

• 2:49:41Joe Rogan?

  But during your time, the deficit did rise, so what was that about? So he had a reasonable explanation. His, his explanation was, it takes time, we were on our way to coming back in a huge way, and then we got hit with COVID, everything got shut down, that's all real. And then there's like a bunch of collusion as to why did we get shut down when he wanted everything to open back up? Did they want the economy to tank right before the election? Fucking, of course they did. Of course they did.

• 2:50:06Speaker 02

  That's why they would lower gas prices right before an election. But, but of what I've known about you for, you know, eighty years I've known you is JFK assassination and aliens.

• 2:50:15Joe Rogan?

  What about the moon landing?

• 2:50:16Speaker 02

  And it's like, if I could tell, if I could see in any future of Joe Rogan talking to a former or a current president, he would ask those two questions.

• 2:50:23Speaker 04

  I was, I was a little disappointed with the, that was, that was one of those moments. You ever hear someone say something dumb as fuck and you're like, oh shit, this guy's dumb?

• 2:50:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:50:31Speaker 04

  That was like the, I don't think Trump's dumb.

• 2:50:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:50:33Speaker 04

  At all. But there was, when he was talking to you about aliens, and you asked him a question and he was like, yeah, Mars, who knows? It's like, no, it's obviously not Mars. It's not that close. It's far, far away. That was the one moment where I was like, oh shit.

• 2:50:51Joe Rogan?

  You brought up aliens?

• 2:50:51Speaker 04

  Anyone to fuck those pilots.

• 2:50:53Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We talked about aliens.

• 2:50:54Speaker 02

  He'd have to ask, he'd have to ask what Air 51 and what happened in those ridiculous films.

• 2:51:00Speaker 04

  That's one of those like, one time I was smoking weed with my friend and we were looking at the stars and a shooting star went by and he was like, is that like a, that's a star flying through the air?

• 2:51:10Speaker 02

  And you're like, no.

• 2:51:11Speaker 04

  No, you have no concept at all.

• 2:51:13Speaker 02

  No, it's not at all.

• 2:51:15Speaker 04

  That was the same thing like with Trump with the UFOs things. He was like, yeah, Mars is right there.

• 2:51:21Joe Rogan?

  Also, there's a thing.

• 2:51:23Speaker 04

  No.

• 2:51:24Joe Rogan?

  But, but hold on. There's a thing about Mars that's fascinating. And one of the things about Mars that's fascinating is at one point in time, whoever, whatever billion years ago, it had an atmosphere.

• 2:51:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:51:35Joe Rogan?

  And it was probably, it was probably closer to the sun and it probably had life. It probably had something. I think that was billions of years ago.

• 2:51:42Speaker 02

  Life, what do you mean by life?

• 2:51:43Joe Rogan?

  Some sort of biological life.

• 2:51:44Speaker 02

  Right.

• 2:51:45Joe Rogan?

  I mean, I, I.

• 2:51:45Speaker 02

  Amoebas?

• 2:51:46Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, something. Now, whether or not there was actually human beings.

• 2:51:49Speaker 02

  Dragons possibly.

• 2:51:51Joe Rogan?

  But what is it? The Dogon tribe? Is it the Dogon tribe? Dragons maybe. I believe in both aliens and dragons. How about that?

• 2:51:57Speaker 04

  There you go, Joy.

• 2:51:59Joe Rogan?

  And I also believe in Joy Behar.

• 2:52:00Speaker 02

  Hey, Joy Behar, suck our dick.

• 2:52:04Joe Rogan?

  Joy Behar is a fucking comedian. Joy Behar is a comedian. Was. But even was, I'll give it to you if you were. Like, we're in the same tribe.

• 2:52:14Speaker 02

  True.

• 2:52:14Joe Rogan?

  Like, I don't hate that lady. I know she's lost, but they're all lost on that fucking show. Imagine being on that show. You got an audience in front of you, you have seven-minute segments, you got a bunch of producers, you're on ABC News. Like, shut the fuck up. That show sucks. You're not gonna make it any better, you know?

• 2:52:29Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:52:30Joe Rogan?

  But she's just a lady. She's a lady trapped in her own biology, she's trapped in her own age, trapped in the time she lives in. She's on a show where her and Whoopi Goldberg are the matriarchs. Like, it's chaos.

• 2:52:41Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:52:41Joe Rogan?

  The whole thing's nuts.

• 2:52:42Speaker 03

  It is nutty.

• 2:52:43Joe Rogan?

  It's nuts. They need Barbara Walters to come back from the grave, start running that thing correctly.

• 2:52:48Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 2:52:48Joe Rogan?

  And if you watch when Trump went on, this is the crazy thing. We can play this now.

• 2:52:53Speaker 03

  I sent this to the group chat.

• 2:52:54Joe Rogan?

  We can play this now, let's play this now.

• 2:52:55Speaker 02

  Trump on The View during this?

• 2:52:56Joe Rogan?

  I would not, no, no, no, no, no.

• 2:52:58Speaker 03

  Years ago and they blew him.

• 2:52:59Joe Rogan?

  No, they blew him. When Trump was here, I wanted to open up the show. This is my thought when I had him on. And I talked about it, but I didn't have that clip because I didn't want him to copyright flag it.

• 2:53:09Speaker 02

  Fuck you on.

• 2:53:10Joe Rogan?

  No, I didn't want him to copyright flag it because it's so crazy. I was like, this conversation I'm having with him is so important. I'm just like, let's just reference it. Let's just reference it. So, the video is from like 2012. It's like before he even runs for president. He goes on The View and they go, "Our friend Donald Trump." And the whole audience cheers. Watch this. You've never seen this?

• 2:53:32Speaker 02

  No.

• 2:53:32Joe Rogan?

  Watch this.

• 2:53:32Speaker 03

  What? I sent it to the group chat.

• 2:53:34Speaker 02

  Because he was a big... Well, Mark, I know a lot of your stuff.

• 2:53:36Speaker 03

  I understand. I get it.

• 2:53:40Speaker 02

  The light is right here.

• 2:53:41Speaker 03

  Well, Barbara Wawa.

• 2:53:47Speaker 02

  They don't want to show that he was their friend.

• 2:53:49Speaker 03

  2011. Well, it looks the same.

• 2:53:52Joe Rogan?

  Look at the cheers. Look at the cheers.

• 2:53:54Speaker 02

  Yeah, he had a board game.

• 2:53:56Joe Rogan?

  Standing ovation.

• 2:53:57Speaker 02

  He had a board game.

• 2:53:58Joe Rogan?

  Standing ovation. Look at this.

• 2:54:00Speaker 02

  Sherri Shepherd.

• 2:54:02Joe Rogan?

  Hey, there she is. Look at this hugs. Joy Behar, Joy Behar, big hug and a kiss.

• 2:54:08Speaker 02

  She says my friend.

• 2:54:09Joe Rogan?

  Look at that. Barbara Walters, we'll be going where, big hug and a kiss. They just hugged Hitler.

• 2:54:14Speaker 02

  Who's the hot, one hot chick?

• 2:54:16Joe Rogan?

  Elizabeth Hasselbeck from Survivor. She was a Republican.

• 2:54:19Speaker 02

  Married to a fucking quarterback.

• 2:54:22Speaker 03

  Ah. Quarterback and Hasselbeck.

• 2:54:26Joe Rogan?

  Look at this. I mean, this is amazing. They, they loved him, they sat down with him. They talked to him about how he's progressive and liberal when it comes to social issues, but economically conservative. And you might be a great president, are you gonna run? And he was talking about it. And look at, look at they're all loving it.

• 2:54:44Speaker 02

  He seems to not be having it from the jump, though.

• 2:54:45Joe Rogan?

  Who cares?

• 2:54:45Speaker 02

  Is she still being there?

• 2:54:46Joe Rogan?

  She's barely alive. Look at, look at Joy Behar. Look at Joy Behar right next to her, all huggy kissy.

• 2:54:52Speaker 02

  Dude, Trump holds it down, dude.

• 2:54:54Speaker 03

  Look at that.

• 2:54:55Joe Rogan?

  They're all hanging on his every word. They're all, like, hanging out with him, they're happy to be there with him.

• 2:55:00Speaker 03

  You ever seen him on Oprah?

• 2:55:02Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, it's amazing.

• 2:55:02Speaker 03

  He killed it.

• 2:55:03Joe Rogan?

  Oprah was also asking him to run for president. The whole thing is nuts.

• 2:55:07Speaker 03

  That is smooth.

• 2:55:08Joe Rogan?

  Way back in the day. Okay, find out when Oprah, go to Oprah asking Trump if he's gonna run for president. What, what we saw is the greatest media psy-op in history.

• 2:55:19Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 2:55:20Joe Rogan?

  Did he say grab him by the pussy? Of course he did. Guess who else did? A lot of those people. Especially back in those days, back in the days before the internet, people said wild.

• 2:55:28Speaker 02

  I gotta be honest. I say follow him by the pussy.

• 2:55:30Joe Rogan?

  Locker room style shit.

• 2:55:32Speaker 02

  I listened to the whole thing. It's, it was a normal, he was like, I'm rich, so girls let me do stuff.

• 2:55:37Joe Rogan?

  I'm famous.

• 2:55:38Speaker 02

  I don't understand the... Even Chappelle had a joke about that, goes, you left out the second part. And you intentionally left out the second part, goes, and they let me, which implies consent.

• 2:55:47Speaker 04

  That's, that's exactly it.

• 2:55:48Speaker 02

  So you're, you're leaving out where they gave me consent to make it seem like they didn't give me consent.

• 2:55:53Joe Rogan?

  Funny.

• 2:55:54Speaker 02

  Right, that's...

• 2:55:54Joe Rogan?

  You think he was really just grabbing people by the, it's a funny thing to say.

• 2:55:57Speaker 02

  Who does that?

• 2:55:57Joe Rogan?

  It's a ridiculous thing to say.

• 2:55:59Speaker 03

  Hard thing to grab, it's like negative space.

• 2:56:01Speaker 02

  It's negative space. You really gotta get two fingers in like a bowl.

• 2:56:03Speaker 04

  Remember the first time you tried to grab it?

• 2:56:05Joe Rogan?

  You could grab it.

• 2:56:05Speaker 04

  When you were, when you were a young man, you go...

• 2:56:07Speaker 03

  Nothing there.

• 2:56:07Joe Rogan?

  Wait, I thought that's, I thought it was gonna be where my dick was.

• 2:56:10Speaker 03

  Yes, and there's the front.

• 2:56:11Speaker 02

  Way lower, way lower.

• 2:56:13Speaker 04

  Try to fuck a belly button.

• 2:56:14Joe Rogan?

  We're talking about children grabbing.

• 2:56:16Speaker 03

  They've never seen their own vagina.

• 2:56:17Joe Rogan?

  But tell it to guys at bar. Girls at bars get grabbed all the time. There's a lot of scumbags.

• 2:56:21Speaker 04

  Yeah, a pussy though.

• 2:56:22Joe Rogan?

  Yes, 100%. I've talked to girls who've had their pussy grabbed by some douchebag who's drunk in a bar.

• 2:56:27Speaker 03

  Oh, wow.

• 2:56:27Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:56:28Speaker 04

  Pussy.

• 2:56:28Joe Rogan?

  Grab it. Grab a hold of it, yeah.

• 2:56:30Speaker 04

  Shitface the Hooters, you go, alright, pay-per-view's over.

• 2:56:33Joe Rogan?

  Come here.

• 2:56:35Speaker 02

  Oh, I'm getting kicked out. And I'm getting kicked out.

• 2:56:38Joe Rogan?

  The point is.

• 2:56:39Speaker 02

  Oh, because I like the Raiders?

• 2:56:40Joe Rogan?

  See, watch this. This is... Look at him. He's cool and calm and collected.

• 2:56:44Speaker 03

  This is from 1988?

• 2:56:45Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that's it. Play it.

• 2:56:47Speaker 03

  They come over here, they sell their cars, their VCRs, they knock the hell out of our companies. And hey, I have tremendous respect for the Japanese people. I mean, you can respect somebody that's beating the hell out of you, but they are beating the hell out of this country. Kuwait, they live like kings. The poorest person in Kuwait, they live like kings. And yet, they're not paying. We make it possible for them to sell their oil. Why aren't they paying us 25%?

• 2:57:08Joe Rogan?

  This is before we invaded.

• 2:57:09Speaker 03

  It's a joke.

• 2:57:10Speaker 00

  This, this sounds like political presidential talk to me, and I know people have talked to you about whether or not you want to run. Would you, would you ever?

• 2:57:17Speaker 03

  Probably not, but I, I do get tired of seeing the country ripped off.

• 2:57:20Speaker 00

  Why would you not?

• 2:57:21Speaker 03

  I just don't think I really have the inclination to do it. I love what I'm doing. I really like it.

• 2:57:26Speaker 00

  Also, it doesn't pay as well.

• 2:57:28Speaker 03

  No, it doesn't. But, you know, I just probably wouldn't do it, Oprah. I probably would, but I do get tired of seeing what's happening with this country. And if it got so bad, I would never want to rule it out totally because I really am tired of seeing what's happening with this country. How we're, how we're really making other people live like kings and we're not.

• 2:57:46Speaker 00

  What, what do you think of this year's presidential race?

• 2:57:49Joe Rogan?

  Good enough.

• 2:57:49Speaker 04

  Who is 88?

• 2:57:51Speaker 03

  Dukakis.

• 2:57:52Speaker 04

  Bush. Bush Dukakis.

• 2:57:54Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, so, this is...

• 2:57:56Speaker 04

  88, no.

• 2:57:57Joe Rogan?

  What you're, what you're seeing with Trump, regardless of his flaws, what you're seeing with Trump regardless of flaws, is a massive concentrated psy-op. They've, they've distorted who he is to the point where most people think that way. Most people think that way. They've, they've had narratives.

• 2:58:14Speaker 03

  What is the psy-op? I keep hearing that.

• 2:58:16Joe Rogan?

  Psychological operation where they've decided to distort people's perceptions of things.

• 2:58:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, when you tell like a, like an older liberal that like the, the Obama deportations were higher than the Trump deportations, they go, no, what? No. And you go, no, just, let me just Google deportations Obama versus Trump. And you go, it's lower. They go, wait, what? Like, here's 19 straight articles saying, saying that I'm right.

• 2:58:40Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:58:40Speaker 02

  And they go, that doesn't make sense. And you go, right. Focus on what's giving you the reality of the world.

• 2:58:46Joe Rogan?

  Check this out. Jamie, go to that, uh, Hillary Clinton thing that I texted you today.

• 2:58:51Speaker 03

  JMo.

• 2:58:51Joe Rogan?

  This one is wild. This is Hillary Clinton in like 2008 and Hillary Clinton saying some wild MAGA type shit about.

• 2:59:01Speaker 02

  Oh, she used to say the wildest shit.

• 2:59:03Joe Rogan?

  Wildest shit about illegal immigrants. Hold on, go, go, go, go back from the beginning. Do it from the beginning. It's okay. Do it from the beginning. But I want to hear it. I think we gotta have tough conditions. Tell people to come out of the shadows. If they've committed a crime, deport them. No questions asked. They're gone. If they.

• 2:59:23Speaker 02

  She's a Republican.

• 2:59:24Joe Rogan?

  If they've been working and are law-abiding, we should say, here are the conditions for you staying. You have to pay a stiff fine because you came here illegally. You have to pay back taxes and you have to try to learn English. Ooh. You have to wait in line. You have to wait in line. And everybody's cheering. 2008, Hillary Clinton was more MAGA than Trump.

• 2:59:46Speaker 02

  She was a Republican.

• 2:59:48Joe Rogan?

  But how about that?

• 2:59:48Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 2:59:49Joe Rogan?

  More MAGA than Trump. It's all a fucking illusion. It's all a fucking illusion. All of them, when convenient, have said the exact same things.

• 2:59:59Speaker 03

  Dragons are real.

• 3:00:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's crazy. It's crazy. They give you a false sense of reality. You just gotta shut them both off.

• 3:00:07Joe Rogan?

  Because they had control of the media up until now. This election was the first time they didn't really have control of the media anymore.

• 3:00:13Speaker 02

  Because what?

• 3:00:13Joe Rogan?

  Because of us.

• 3:00:14Speaker 02

  Non-mainstream media?

• 3:00:15Joe Rogan?

  Because of podcasts.

• 3:00:16Speaker 03

  Podcasts, selling tickets.

• 3:00:18Joe Rogan?

  Because of social media, because of X.

• 3:00:19Speaker 02

  You're humanizing Trump. Like, well, he's a human.

• 3:00:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:00:22Speaker 02

  So why, why can't I invite the other lady on?

• 3:00:25Joe Rogan?

  They've, they've been caught up in all this shit that they've shoved down everybody's throat, especially all the Russia shit.

• 3:00:30Speaker 02

  Do you think the campaign people for Kamala Harris was going, we should have let her go on Rogan?

• 3:00:38Joe Rogan?

  Definitely.

• 3:00:38Speaker 02

  Or they go, that was a no win.

• 3:00:40Joe Rogan?

  Some people maybe, it would have been a win. I would have been nicer. I told her. I told her I will talk about anything. They didn't want to talk about marijuana legalization, and they didn't want to talk about internet censorship. But then they changed their mind about the internet censorship. And then they contacted and said they want to talk about internet censorship. We, we had like no bullshit, at least I didn't have any of them. But there was at least three calls. There was like multiple emails back and forth and there was dates proposed. This idea that they passed on it because the progressive people. Look, I'm sure the progressive people didn't want her to do it. I'm sure there's people that did want her to do it. But they were trying to schedule it. This is not a thing that was like they had resistance to it. They contacted me. They contacted me when they found out when Trump's camp leaked that he was coming on.

• 3:01:25Joe Rogan?

  They contacted me and they wanted to come on. They had contacted me before and were inquiring about coming on. Once Trump said he was coming on, then they wanted to come on. But they wanted me to do an hour and they wanted me to travel to them.

• 3:01:38Speaker 02

  Well, that's crazy, but like, yeah, it's like.

• 3:01:41Joe Rogan?

  Elon said it best. He said those last two hours where you really find out what's going on. Like you can bullshit people for forty minutes.

• 3:01:47Speaker 02

  Get them comfortable.

• 3:01:48Joe Rogan?

  If I'm talking to you for three hours, we're going to talk about some real shit.

• 3:01:51Speaker 03

  That's when that funnel comes up.

• 3:01:52Speaker 04

  Let's protect our parks.

• 3:01:53Speaker 02

  Let's protect our parks. I hate, I hate people from North Dakota. It's obvious.

• 3:01:59Joe Rogan?

  But. You don't know anybody.

• 3:02:00Speaker 03

  The caller daddy, they had to build the set. They had to replicate it and it costs like, you know, a couple hundred grand.

• 3:02:05Joe Rogan?

  They said six figures.

• 3:02:07Speaker 02

  And it's Kanye shit.

• 3:02:08Speaker 03

  Still didn't hit a million views.

• 3:02:10Speaker 02

  You know what does hit a million views? Neil Diamond's Coming to America.

• 3:02:13Joe Rogan?

  I'm good for now.

• 3:02:13Speaker 02

  You're not though.

• 3:02:14Speaker 03

  They just did one. You're up.

• 3:02:15Speaker 02

  No, no, we just did it.

• 3:02:16Joe Rogan?

  No, Mark and I just did them.

• 3:02:18Speaker 02

  That's wrong.

• 3:02:19Joe Rogan?

  That's a hundred percent true.

• 3:02:20Speaker 04

  That's a psyop. That's a psyop.

• 3:02:22Speaker 02

  History, history.

• 3:02:23Joe Rogan?

  No, Mark and I just did them. Didn't we just do that?

• 3:02:26Speaker 02

  We did it before we did them.

• 3:02:27Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, no, no. We did them.

• 3:02:29Speaker 04

  We went first on everyone.

• 3:02:30Joe Rogan?

  We did them last. Jamie, is that correct? Did we do them last?

• 3:02:33Speaker 04

  Jamie, that's a psyop.

• 3:02:33Speaker 02

  It's not.

• 3:02:34Speaker 03

  I think they did them last.

• 3:02:34Speaker 04

  I don't think you did them before us.

• 3:02:36Joe Rogan?

  What song did you guys just play? We played Ho-Kogan.

• 3:02:41Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 3:02:41Speaker 03

  Oh, that's what he told me had bad breath.

• 3:02:45Joe Rogan?

  Here's the craziest thing about Trump.

• 3:02:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:02:46Joe Rogan?

  The people that love him, there's a spectrum of the people that love him where you're terrified you're gonna run to them people. You're terrified you're gonna get cornered by those people. I was in Aspen and this fucking lady came up to me and it was like her and her daughter. The lady was like fifty-nine-ish, sixty-five-ish, you know, that kinda age. And she, uh, she comes up to me, she goes, uh, she goes, "You know Trump's the real president of the United States." And I go, "But he's not." I go, "Joe Biden's the president." Like, "They already called the election." She goes, "Oh, you're one of them." I go, "He won, he won the election. I don't know if the election was good, you know, maybe it wasn't good, but he's not the president." This is the, if you look online, if you Google it, I go, "It says President Biden."

• 3:03:30Speaker 02

  Yeah, he is not president.

• 3:03:31Joe Rogan?

  There's those people, that if you get caught with them, like they, you know, they're all in, they're my pillow.

• 3:03:35Speaker 02

  9/11 truthers.

• 3:03:36Joe Rogan?

  They're all in.

• 3:03:37Speaker 02

  Yeah, you did push back harder on like, "Why was it rigged?" I like that.

• 3:03:40Speaker 03

  It does feel like he is running shit.

• 3:03:42Speaker 02

  Tell me what's rigged, what do you mean?

• 3:03:43Joe Rogan?

  I wanted to, I would hope that he would have had a good answer. I would have hoped he have data that he could spit out. If you told me, if I really ran for president, I knew they rigged it and they gave me evidence enough that I would say publicly they rigged it, I'd be able to spit that out.

• 3:03:57Speaker 02

  Yeah. Instead of just saying it.

• 3:03:59Speaker 03

  We should be part of the cabinet. We're protecting parks. We should be the official podcast. Yeah!

• 3:04:04Speaker 02

  Official podcast of Trump. I will tell you, that video, we haven't watched it yet, that video of him saying, "We're done with internet censorship."

• 3:04:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:04:11Speaker 02

  Was like, "This actually affects me, me." And I, I like the, what he's saying.

• 3:04:16Joe Rogan?

  Huge.

• 3:04:16Speaker 02

  I liked it, got me fired up.

• 3:04:18Joe Rogan?

  These fucking companies are scary because they dictate the narrative of the whole world. It's not just as simple as, "Oh, you're removing hate speech." No, you're changing the way people talk about things and you're dorks. You're not people that I want changing these things. You guys are fucking idiots.

• 3:04:34Speaker 02

  They were talking about verbal consent, that was a big thing, and every cool person was like, "Those are virgins telling us how to do sex."

• 3:04:41Speaker 03

  Hmm, it's like the gays on, uh, America's Got Talent telling us who's hot.

• 3:04:49Speaker 02

  I'll allow it.

• 3:04:51Joe Rogan?

  Which ones are you talking about?

• 3:04:53Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 3:04:54Joe Rogan?

  Who are you talking about? Lionel Richie? Who the fuck are you talking about?

• 3:04:58Speaker 03

  Well, you know, those, the America's Top Model. That's what I meant. Oh. The gay guys like, she's sexy. I'm like, no, no, no, you're not, you're gay.

• 3:05:05Speaker 02

  When he said without free speech, we're fucked.

• 3:05:07Joe Rogan?

  Without free speech, we're fucked.

• 3:05:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:05:08Joe Rogan?

  Without free speech, we're fucked.

• 3:05:10Speaker 02

  Why don't we play that?

• 3:05:10Joe Rogan?

  You get no, yeah, let's play that. You get no protect our parks without free speech.

• 3:05:14Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:05:14Joe Rogan?

  Imagine if Comedy Central gave us notes on protect our parks.

• 3:05:17Speaker 02

  Well, do you remember when?

• 3:05:18Speaker 03

  It'd be like 11 minutes.

• 3:05:19Speaker 02

  Do you remember when you hosted a standup show right after the Iraq invasion?

• 3:05:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:05:24Speaker 02

  And what did they tell you?

• 3:05:26Joe Rogan?

  I don't remember.

• 3:05:26Speaker 02

  They said, no talking about Bush, no talking about the war.

• 3:05:30Joe Rogan?

  Where was that?

• 3:05:31Speaker 02

  On NBC Late Friday.

• 3:05:33Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 3:05:35Speaker 02

  Right? Am I wrong or no?

• 3:05:36Joe Rogan?

  No, I think you're right, yeah. I think that was a narrative for the, every comic that went up there.

• 3:05:40Speaker 02

  Yeah, just can't talk about this.

• 3:05:41Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, can't talk about Bush, can't talk about the war.

• 3:05:43Speaker 02

  And you're like, no, don't talk, don't say anything.

• 3:05:45Joe Rogan?

  Remember Mitzi wouldn't let Holtzman go on stage for two weeks after 9/11?

• 3:05:51Speaker 02

  Duncan had to call him.

• 3:05:52Speaker 03

  That makes sense. That makes sense, dude. But it's fucking amazing.

• 3:05:56Speaker 02

  No, but actually, it's, it tracks, because, because she was like, tell Holtzman, like, hey, we love you, but you can't go on. Happened on Tuesday, closed Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, open on Friday, Saturday. Holtzman, you can't get spots. Sunday was open mic night. You could go up. Me and Stan Hope were watching Holtzman go up.

• 3:06:12Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 3:06:12Speaker 02

  And he was talking about how he would have jumped out and tried to hit a cop.

• 3:06:18Speaker 02

  And Stan Hope was like, I disagree with 90% of this, but he's saying it so well. And it had to be an open mic night to get him on. Duncan called him, he goes, uh, did you know anybody in 9/11? He goes, I know they're Americans. I don't know what else you gotta know.

• 3:06:31Joe Rogan?

  He's got a home here now. You know, he's headlining here now.

• 3:06:34Speaker 02

  He's excelling.

• 3:06:35Joe Rogan?

  Instead of like, you being-

• 3:06:36Speaker 03

  Damn, if he was in LA, he'd be crucified.

• 3:06:39Joe Rogan?

  He'd be crucified. But they weren't giving him good spots at the store. He was getting these spots at 2 o'clock in the morning, there was no one left. He was getting these spots where we would be in the back laughing, but it's like, you know, 10 people in the crowd. It's bullshit.

• 3:06:53Speaker 02

  Throwing up laughing, like so hard that you're like, I'm almost barfing.

• 3:06:56Joe Rogan?

  Holtzman is such an animal.

• 3:06:57Speaker 03

  Bro, you can't believe.

• 3:06:59Joe Rogan?

  He's so crazy, but now he's doing it to pack crowds and they're coming from all over the world to come see Holtzman.

• 3:07:04Speaker 04

  And they know him.

• 3:07:05Joe Rogan?

  Yes, man. Holtzman's show, his shows sell. Oh, good. He's doing sets all the time at the mothership. He's here all the time. I just saw him the other day. He was murdering.

• 3:07:15Speaker 04

  Probably nuts.

• 3:07:16Joe Rogan?

  He's out of his fucking mind. He's out of his fucking mind. It's great.

• 3:07:19Speaker 04

  When we did the Kill Tony Garden, he got up there and he was like, fuck Billy Joel.

• 3:07:23Speaker 02

  Fuck Billy Joel. You're already people here. MSG has committed suicide because they gotta work on Billy Joel's show.

• 3:07:29Joe Rogan?

  It was amazing. He's got a batter up.

• 3:07:32Speaker 02

  The guy's got a batter up next to the fucking Rangers.

• 3:07:35Joe Rogan?

  He's like, fuck Billy Joel. He's fucking screaming and the audience is dying.

• 3:07:39Speaker 04

  Oh, you guys are upset.

• 3:07:40Joe Rogan?

  By the way, you gotta realize this is only like probably a second or third time ever he's performed in an arena. He did one of those Kill Tonys in an arena. That didn't go that good.

• 3:07:48Speaker 04

  I was there for that one too.

• 3:07:50Joe Rogan?

  That was not that good, but the Madison Square Garden one, he fucking killed. Bro, that was so, Madison Square Garden was so fun. It was not just fun. It was like, it was like a moment in comedy history. Where you felt like, like this is gonna be something that people talk about in the future. You know, like this, this broke through. This show that I watched in the belly room that had like 10 people in the audience. I was in one of the third or fourth episodes ever and now you have it here in Madison Square Garden. It sold out in 40 minutes.

• 3:08:19Speaker 04

  Aaron Rodgers throwing off footballs to the crowd.

• 3:08:21Joe Rogan?

  The Black Keys.

• 3:08:22Speaker 04

  Black Keys are opening, Jelly Roll.

• 3:08:24Joe Rogan?

  Jelly Roll performs, Dice Clay performs.

• 3:08:26Speaker 02

  Dice Clay at MSG.

• 3:08:28Joe Rogan?

  It was amazing.

• 3:08:29Speaker 04

  Yeah, that was wild.

• 3:08:29Joe Rogan?

  Joey Diaz, when I brought Joey Diaz out, it was insane.

• 3:08:33Speaker 02

  Listen, I've never, I will not endorse a candidate. I've never endorsed a candidate, but I will endorse one today. No one knows who's coming out. My endorsement for fucking President of the United States.

• 3:08:43Joe Rogan?

  Greatest humans that's ever lived.

• 3:08:44Speaker 02

  Joey Diaz. And like, no fucking way. No fucking way.

• 3:08:47Joe Rogan?

  And when he was walking out there, everybody knows him. He's like a legend now. He's like a fucking Snuffleupagus. He's like, he's like a mysterious character.

• 3:08:55Speaker 04

  He actually didn't walk out like a Snuffleupagus. Slow like that?

• 3:08:59Joe Rogan?

  He's like a mythical being. And when he goes out there, people just had this giant smile on their face. I was watching these people. Cause I was beside him, so I'm watching, you know, the all. Audience as they're watching him, oh my god, it was amazing.

• 3:09:12Speaker 02

  Everyone is having, I was sitting next to Norton.

• 3:09:14Joe Rogan?

  So much fun.

• 3:09:15Speaker 02

  Watching Dice and it was like we were back in high school.

• 3:09:17Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:09:18Speaker 02

  This is his stage where we first saw him.

• 3:09:20Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:09:21Speaker 02

  All of it, all of it. I was with the R U garbage guy. We're just like, when Aziz C and Simone came up, it was just like, so fun.

• 3:09:28Joe Rogan?

  It was a celebration of comedy.

• 3:09:29Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 3:09:29Joe Rogan?

  You know Gomez was there, Big J was there. It was a real celebration of comedy.

• 3:09:34Speaker 02

  Gomez crushed, Big J crushed, DeRosa, yeah.

• 3:09:36Joe Rogan?

  It was, it was a celebration of like this kind of comedy, the kind that we like, the wild shit, where someone's going, saying something crazy and you're like, ah.

• 3:09:45Speaker 02

  And Tony just set everybody, I know you hate him, but like he just set everybody up so well.

• 3:09:50Speaker 03

  Did you see, you see Dice with, uh, Seinfeld?

• 3:09:53Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 3:09:54Speaker 03

  No. You see that video?

• 3:09:55Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 3:09:55Speaker 03

  Oh, pull it up, Jamo.

• 3:09:56Speaker 02

  He saw him at the park.

• 3:09:57Speaker 03

  Don't, don't give it away.

• 3:09:58Speaker 02

  Okay, okay, okay.

• 3:09:59Speaker 03

  Let's play the video.

• 3:10:00Joe Rogan?

  Is this a recent one? Yeah, this is very recent.

• 3:10:03Speaker 02

  Song or no?

• 3:10:04Speaker 03

  Hold on, we got Dice video.

• 3:10:06Speaker 02

  Dude, the Dice is a real American.

• 3:10:07Speaker 03

  Hit him a song before we.

• 3:10:08Speaker 02

  Okay, we're doing America, Neil Diamond?

• 3:10:10Joe Rogan?

  Gimme Free Bird, middle of the rant. Free Bird, middle, middle of the, uh.

• 3:10:15Speaker 03

  Hold on, Jamo's got a lot of ones and twos going on here.

• 3:10:18Joe Rogan?

  Middle of the guitar solo.

• 3:10:21Speaker 02

  Here we go. Jamo, are you, are you gonna buy one?

• 3:10:25Speaker 03

  Yeah, Jamo, you're up.

• 3:10:26Speaker 02

  We got an extra beer.

• 3:10:27Speaker 03

  Get that mustache wet.

• 3:10:28Joe Rogan?

  Jamie will get in there. Jamo's been a real wet rag. It's hour three and a, we're at three and a half hours in, here we go.

• 3:10:37Speaker 03

  Oh, hell yeah. Oakland Coliseum.

• 3:10:55Speaker 03

  Hey, two million views on the.

• 3:10:56Joe Rogan?

  That's the most American riff of all time.

• 3:11:00Speaker 03

  Oh, how is Josh Brolin? Cool guy?

• 3:11:03Joe Rogan?

  What's that?

• 3:11:04Speaker 03

  How is Josh Brolin?

• 3:11:05Joe Rogan?

  Oh, he's awesome. Look at this.

• 3:11:11Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 3:11:13Speaker 02

  Look at Bert.

• 3:11:17Speaker 03

  That's wearing like a cult, cult outfit.

• 3:11:22Joe Rogan?

  Uh. Magic times.

• 3:11:24Speaker 02

  Just chill shredding. Just chilling and shredding.

• 3:11:28Speaker 03

  No phones.

• 3:11:28Speaker 04

  Good JMo one.

• 3:11:30Joe Rogan?

  Alright, let's get that to JMo. And let's uh.

• 3:11:33Speaker 03

  See that Seinfeld?

• 3:11:34Joe Rogan?

  Let's find Seinfeld getting chased down by Dice.

• 3:11:37Speaker 02

  He interrupted me on stage the other, like, three days ago.

• 3:11:40Speaker 03

  Yeah, I saw that.

• 3:11:41Speaker 02

  I'm onstage, he just comes up with his camera out.

• 3:11:43Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:11:45Speaker 02

  Fuck.

• 3:11:45Speaker 03

  You handled it well.

• 3:11:46Speaker 02

  Thanks.

• 3:11:47Speaker 03

  He's amazing.

• 3:11:49Joe Rogan?

  He's coming here soon.

• 3:11:50Speaker 02

  National treasure.

• 3:11:51Joe Rogan?

  I think he's back here in December, headlining.

• 3:11:53Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 3:11:54Speaker 02

  Yeah, on the website it says "coming soon."

• 3:11:56Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:11:56Speaker 02

  Just like, oh, alerting people.

• 3:11:57Speaker 03

  I think it's on his Instagram, JMo.

• 3:12:01Speaker 03

  He's walking through Central Park.

• 3:12:02Speaker 02

  It's all, it's there.

• 3:12:03Joe Rogan?

  How good is this fucking guitar solo?

• 3:12:05Speaker 04

  Never gets old.

• 3:12:07Joe Rogan?

  Never.

• 3:12:07Speaker 02

  I mean, it's one of the greatest of all time.

• 3:12:09Joe Rogan?

  If I ever wanna feel good and I'm driving down the street, I'll crank that.

• 3:12:13Speaker 03

  There it is, right there. That's it.

• 3:12:17Speaker 02

  That's it, let's hear it.

• 3:12:18Speaker 03

  Kill the music.

• 3:12:22Speaker 04

  Big shot comedian.

• 3:12:25Speaker 02

  Tense up.

• 3:12:26Speaker 04

  Big shot. Big shot over here, Jerry.

• 3:12:34Joe Rogan?

  Jerry, it's Dice.

• 3:12:40Speaker 02

  He's wearing merch for his movie.

• 3:12:43Speaker 03

  They're walking away like, who's this fucking psycho?

• 3:12:45Speaker 02

  He's tensed up. I've been there.

• 3:12:47Speaker 04

  Big shot comedian.

• 3:12:50Speaker 03

  The guy's like, let's get out of here.

• 3:12:51Speaker 02

  Let's get out, should keep walking. Let's keep, some lunatic.

• 3:12:54Speaker 04

  He's got a fucking Sasquatch gay.

• 3:12:57Speaker 02

  He's wearing a Free jacket.

• 3:12:59Speaker 03

  What do you mean?

• 3:13:01Joe Rogan?

  Somebody gave it to him.

• 3:13:02Speaker 02

  Unfrosted.

• 3:13:02Joe Rogan?

  Production company?

• 3:13:03Speaker 02

  No, unfrosted from the fucking.

• 3:13:05Joe Rogan?

  Swag. He's wearing swag, dude.

• 3:13:07Speaker 02

  That's his normal.

• 3:13:08Speaker 04

  He really is Jewish as fuck.

• 3:13:10Speaker 03

  All out. I did some fundraiser.

• 3:13:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, get excited, Jamo.

• 3:13:15Speaker 03

  Jamie, let's go, Jamie.

• 3:13:17Speaker 04

  You're such a little sad guy.

• 3:13:17Speaker 03

  O-H-I-O.

• 3:13:20Speaker 02

  Hey, fuck you, Indiana Hoosiers.

• 3:13:22Speaker 03

  Nice ponytail, bitch.

• 3:13:24Speaker 02

  Suck Ohio State's dick.

• 3:13:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:13:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's Jamo.

• 3:13:28Speaker 03

  Oh, damn.

• 3:13:29Speaker 02

  Damn.

• 3:13:30Speaker 03

  That was insane.

• 3:13:31Speaker 02

  Yeah, Jamie doesn't fuck around every time.

• 3:13:33Speaker 03

  That was so quick. Holy shit. That's a new record.

• 3:13:36Speaker 02

  That's the throat goat.

• 3:13:37Joe Rogan?

  That's pretty damn good.

• 3:13:38Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 3:13:39Speaker 02

  Jamie rules.

• 3:13:40Speaker 03

  RFK's out. New throat goat.

• 3:13:43Joe Rogan?

  You're RFK's throat goat?

• 3:13:46Speaker 03

  Yeah, me for a second. Easy, that's offensive.

• 3:13:50Speaker 02

  What's Tulsi gonna do for the new thing?

• 3:13:53Joe Rogan?

  Um, she's something about national intelligence, right? What is she?

• 3:13:55Speaker 03

  Ooh.

• 3:13:56Speaker 02

  She should be Secretary of State.

• 3:13:58Speaker 03

  Hawaiian.

• 3:13:59Joe Rogan?

  She has some serious, top-level clearance and, uh... I wanna find out about...

• 3:14:04Speaker 04

  What the fuck?

• 3:14:05Joe Rogan?

  I wanna find out about UFOs.

• 3:14:07Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's, that's, that's you.

• 3:14:09Joe Rogan?

  Tulsi's my friend.

• 3:14:10Speaker 03

  Dragons.

• 3:14:11Speaker 02

  Jamo set the record, but at what cost?

• 3:14:13Speaker 03

  It's shit and blood already.

• 3:14:15Joe Rogan?

  He's running, he's running.

• 3:14:16Speaker 02

  Well, that was crazy. He ran right out.

• 3:14:19Speaker 03

  That wasn't a pee run. That was a fucking Jimmy John's sub. That was coming up. Freaky fast. Full miscarriage.

• 3:14:28Speaker 02

  That was one bomb.

• 3:14:29Speaker 03

  Yeah, bro.

• 3:14:29Speaker 02

  This poop was props you by Jimmy John's?

• 3:14:31Joe Rogan?

  That's an Italian sub, ready to make birth.

• 3:14:34Speaker 03

  Free smells.

• 3:14:35Joe Rogan?

  Boom, ba-boom.

• 3:14:36Speaker 03

  Oh, I did that, uh, did some benefit. I got to wear the suit. Thanks again for those suits.

• 3:14:40Speaker 02

  That suit rules. David, what? David August?

• 3:14:43Speaker 03

  Fuck David August.

• 3:14:43Speaker 02

  That suit rules. We hung out, had martinis all night one night. I wore it for Kill Tony. That suit rules.

• 3:14:51Speaker 03

  Those things are perfectly fit.

• 3:14:52Joe Rogan?

  When you get a suit that's designed actually for your, your actual body...

• 3:14:56Speaker 03

  Never had. I've been a warehouse, men's warehouse cunt for my whole life.

• 3:14:59Speaker 02

  I told that guy, I was like, hey, I just like a weird cup, but also stylish. And then it's like, he's like, I'm like, you know what? You're an artist. I think you get it. Go.

• 3:15:06Joe Rogan?

  He got you a dope one.

• 3:15:07Speaker 02

  He got it.

• 3:15:08Speaker 03

  That was a beauty.

• 3:15:09Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:15:09Speaker 02

  Yeah, he did good, but he fucked with me. Why?

• 3:15:11Joe Rogan?

  How so?

• 3:15:12Speaker 02

  Uh, the guy that, he was taking pictures when we were here last.

• 3:15:15Speaker 03

  David August?

• 3:15:15Speaker 02

  And he, uh...

• 3:15:17Speaker 04

  He was like, well, your left shoulder slouches more than your right.

• 3:15:21Speaker 03

  You lean left.

• 3:15:22Speaker 04

  I've thought about it every single day.

• 3:15:24Speaker 02

  That's not so bad. That's a Brian Regan bit.

• 3:15:27Speaker 04

  Really?

• 3:15:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, he goes, I went to get my eyes tested. The doctor was like, hey, just your eyes are slightly off center. Nothing to worry about. I just thought you wanted to focus on it for the rest of your life.

• 3:15:36Speaker 04

  Yeah, it rings true. I've thought about it nonstop every second.

• 3:15:40Joe Rogan?

  That's Lucas. He was, he's good, man. He knows how to measure you.

• 3:15:44Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 3:15:45Joe Rogan?

  You get a suit and it's like, it feels like it's designed for your body. So much better.

• 3:15:48Speaker 02

  It's draped on. It's skin.

• 3:15:50Speaker 03

  It's got your name in the pocket.

• 3:15:51Speaker 02

  The name. He puts a tie with it.

• 3:15:53Speaker 03

  I know.

• 3:15:54Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's pretty cool.

• 3:15:55Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 3:15:56Speaker 03

  Very nice. Yeah.

• 3:15:57Speaker 02

  Joe, fucking, that was fucking cool as shit.

• 3:16:00Speaker 04

  That was really, really nice. Thank you very much.

• 3:16:02Speaker 02

  Joe's like, hey, come an hour early. Like, why? Like, get a suit. What? Okay. And then he goes, what do you want, four? I'm like, four.

• 3:16:09Joe Rogan?

  Let's get some fucking suits. Let's get some suits, son.

• 3:16:12Speaker 03

  Everything's like the hotel, the car. It's all very nice. You're a, you're a mensch.

• 3:16:17Joe Rogan?

  Well, I like to treat people the way I like to be treated.

• 3:16:20Speaker 03

  Ah.

• 3:16:21Speaker 02

  Joe fought for, gush for a second, for equal pay for comedians in Los Angeles. When all those like book shows were like, oh, we'll give you 50 bucks. And Joe's like, no, you're fucking making money off us now.

• 3:16:34Speaker 03

  Oh, the mothership pays like crazy.

• 3:16:35Speaker 02

  And you don't need the 600 dollars. It's not that. It's, it's, it's, it's a, it's a, who was the guy who went in front of Congress and spoke about, from, from Colorado, Rocky Mountain High?

• 3:16:44Speaker 03

  Oh, David Lucas.

• 3:16:45Speaker 02

  No.

• 3:16:48Speaker 02

  Singing about rap.

• 3:16:49Speaker 03

  John Denver?

• 3:16:50Speaker 02

  John Denver. That's you fighting for 600 bucks. It's like, I don't need this. It's bullshit. You're not giving everybody their equal pay.

• 3:16:55Joe Rogan?

  No, it was David Lucas.

• 3:16:56Speaker 02

  It was David Lucas.

• 3:16:58Joe Rogan?

  Well, the store was like a great, a great place for us to work out shit, but it was also like, wait a minute, why is the guy who's running the show making $6,000? And no one's making anything other than a couple of people. This is crazy. Like, this whole thing's nuts. But it's like, you know, if you let person, people do that, they're gonna do it. They're gonna rip people off. You let them rip people off, they're gonna rip people off.

• 3:17:22Speaker 04

  Uh, you got that right.

• 3:17:24Joe Rogan?

  Jesus Christ. It's just one of those things, if you, if they don't get checked, I mean, that's what happened if unions didn't exist.

• 3:17:31Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:17:31Joe Rogan?

  I mean, if unions didn't exist, you imagine if you just pay people whatever you wanna pay them? And then all these illegals are spilling in.

• 3:17:38Speaker 02

  Child labor, fine.

• 3:17:39Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, fine, no child laws, no child labor laws, we'd be fucked.

• 3:17:42Speaker 03

  Are you saying comedians need a union?

• 3:17:44Joe Rogan?

  Nah, that'll never work, cause there's too many cunts.

• 3:17:47Speaker 02

  They'll turn against each other in no time.

• 3:17:48Speaker 04

  It'd be like the Italians having a union.

• 3:17:51Joe Rogan?

  You know what you really need is clubs run by comics. If all clubs were run by comics.

• 3:17:56Speaker 03

  That's a horrible idea.

• 3:17:57Joe Rogan?

  Well, I think there's a couple other ones. The one in Key West, that guy is a comic that runs it.

• 3:18:01Speaker 02

  Tom Dustin, that place rules.

• 3:18:03Joe Rogan?

  There's Brad Garrett's club.

• 3:18:05Speaker 02

  That Joe List, uh...

• 3:18:06Speaker 03

  Documentary is killer.

• 3:18:07Speaker 02

  The funniest documentary I've ever seen in my life.

• 3:18:09Speaker 03

  We saw it in a theater.

• 3:18:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, we saw it at Angelica. Cause it's about a comedian.

• 3:18:14Speaker 03

  Portrait of a comedian.

• 3:18:15Speaker 04

  Where can you get it?

• 3:18:16Speaker 02

  He, he just got a deal to be in theaters.

• 3:18:18Speaker 03

  They're in theaters, so it's gonna come out eventually.

• 3:18:20Speaker 04

  Nice.

• 3:18:21Speaker 02

  But it was just a comic being a comic, and that's the documentary, he's not playing it up.

• 3:18:24Joe Rogan?

  I think best case scenario is every comic who gets a pile of money, you should invest in a club. That's the best, I, I think like it should be, Chappelle did it, he did it.

• 3:18:34Speaker 03

  But you were on acid that one time, when you were talking to me, you're like, don't ever open a room, it sucks.

• 3:18:38Joe Rogan?

  No, I didn't say that.

• 3:18:39Speaker 02

  He's just...

• 3:18:40Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 3:18:40Speaker 03

  That's been acid talking.

• 3:18:42Speaker 02

  He's casual complaining.

• 3:18:43Speaker 04

  You're like this, I was...

• 3:18:44Joe Rogan?

  I'm like, it's a lot of work, but that, we've, we ironed out a lot of the parts. It's work, man, it's work. It's work, but it's worth it.

• 3:18:51Speaker 03

  Alright.

• 3:18:51Joe Rogan?

  It really is worth it.

• 3:18:52Speaker 02

  I was at, uh, hold on, no, yeah.

• 3:18:55Joe Rogan?

  I never said, you're, you're misquoting me, I definitely never said, never open up a room. I said it's a lot of work, and you have to have a lot of money. You have to, you have to be willing to not make money. And most things that people do where they invest a lot of money, they wanna make money.

• 3:19:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:19:08Joe Rogan?

  My thought was like, if anybody has the ability to do it the right way, it's me. Like, I have to do it. Like, I have to, what I would, if I was a kid and I was looking at like, comics that had a lot of money, if I had that guy's money, you know what I would do?

• 3:19:22Speaker 02

  We all dreamed about that.

• 3:19:23Joe Rogan?

  Right. I'm like, well, just do it.

• 3:19:25Speaker 03

  Yeah, and it's a hu- it's a hit.

• 3:19:28Speaker 02

  And then you could just go, you have a billion dollars. Like, why do I fly to make money? Why do I fly to make a hundred grand? I can just go here. That means nothing to you.

• 3:19:36Joe Rogan?

  It's also so much easier on your life. You don't have to fly all the time.

• 3:19:39Speaker 02

  Drive in, do a spot, come back.

• 3:19:40Joe Rogan?

  Flying all the time sucks. You're always tired.

• 3:19:43Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:19:43Joe Rogan?

  You get worn out all the time. Flying just fucking kills your immune system. You're always exhausted.

• 3:19:49Speaker 02

  Agreed.

• 3:19:49Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, jet lag is the worst.

• 3:19:50Speaker 02

  I gotta go a day early now so I don't get sick.

• 3:19:52Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, and you have to drink a lot of water and hit the gym and your body has to reset. You're like, what the fuck?

• 3:19:57Speaker 04

  What were you saying? Oh, I was gonna say, uh, I was at, I went out to Ohio for Chappelle's birthday this year. And, uh, did his show and all that. And then we, after we did the outside show, we went to his club. And he was hammered.

• 3:20:13Speaker 03

  Get out of here.

• 3:20:14Speaker 04

  It was his birthday and he was just up on stage holding everyone hostage, hammered. But he, he said the funniest shit. He was just up there and he's like, "I worked my whole life to build this club. To bomb in front of you motherfuckers." It was so good. There was just all these people standing there like. But he knew, he knew it wasn't going well. He just kept going. It was so funny.

• 3:20:37Joe Rogan?

  He'll keep going and try to find the nuggets.

• 3:20:39Speaker 04

  Yeah, and he will. That's the craziest thing.

• 3:20:42Joe Rogan?

  He's a miner.

• 3:20:42Speaker 04

  Even blacked out, he'll find it.

• 3:20:45Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, and then once he finds it, that piece they'll save, they'll edit it, they'll put it aside. And then he'll go, okay, now I got a chunk.

• 3:20:52Speaker 02

  I like also when he, when it doesn't go well, he's like, "Give me that ta- that, that's fucked. Give me that tape, I can't do that again." He still feels it.

• 3:20:59Speaker 03

  He's a miner. That's why Jeff Ross likes him.

• 3:21:01Joe Rogan?

  Well, you.

• 3:21:03Speaker 03

  Cut that.

• 3:21:06Speaker 04

  Keep it, Jeff Ross.

• 3:21:07Speaker 03

  JMo.

• 3:21:08Speaker 04

  And we're back. We love Jeff Ross.

• 3:21:12Speaker 03

  Funny guy.

• 3:21:13Joe Rogan?

  You've gotta be able to like make the, you know, we used to do that a lot, Damon Wayans. You remember those days?

• 3:21:18Speaker 03

  So funny.

• 3:21:19Speaker 02

  He would do fifteen of intentionally bad.

• 3:21:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:21:22Speaker 03

  Really?

• 3:21:22Speaker 02

  So you would like, you've lost trust in me and now I can try my jokes.

• 3:21:26Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:21:27Speaker 03

  He calls it a jazz set.

• 3:21:28Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he would fuck around. Damon has recorded like every show he's ever done since the nineties.

• 3:21:34Speaker 03

  Damn, that's old.

• 3:21:35Joe Rogan?

  To this day, to this day, he sets up, I saw him in the improv a few years back before covid and he set up a camera in the back room. I go, you do this every set? He goes, every set. And I wa- I watch him on my computer. He records all of them, he has them all archived and he riffs. That's how he comes up with shit. He just gets up on there, starts talking about something. Anything that's in the news, he starts riffing on it and then he'll find something.

• 3:21:56Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:21:56Joe Rogan?

  And that's how he writes.

• 3:21:57Speaker 03

  I feel that's too self-indulgent. I feel too guilty.

• 3:21:59Speaker 02

  It depends what level it is. You can't do it in the garden, but like you could, you could do it at your comedy club.

• 3:22:05Speaker 04

  Yeah, you could.

• 3:22:06Speaker 03

  I can't.

• 3:22:06Speaker 04

  But you gotta be willing to bomb.

• 3:22:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, you gotta be willing to bomb.

• 3:22:08Speaker 04

  Which is the hardest.

• 3:22:09Joe Rogan?

  But that's his creative process. You know, Chris Rock used to do the same thing. He used to go on and just ramble about stuff and you tell the audience, relax, relax, this ain't gonna be funny.

• 3:22:17Speaker 02

  Lower your expectations.

• 3:22:18Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. But eventually it would be an HBO special or a Netflix special and it would kill, but it's a process.

• 3:22:25Speaker 03

  Well, I gotta say, I've been watching Louis of, over the past couple of months, he's back doing shit and he was struggling, to put it lightly. And then I saw him two nights ago and all that same shit is killing.

• 3:22:35Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, cuz he's willing to do it.

• 3:22:37Speaker 02

  It's crazy, same material, just tweaked slightly. I saw, I saw Martin at the store come back after five years off.

• 3:22:43Speaker 03

  Martin.

• 3:22:43Speaker 02

  And then he was like, uh, not good. Six months later, same material, crushing.

• 3:22:47Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:22:48Speaker 02

  Same material, not just like, I'm abandoning this, just figuring it out.

• 3:22:51Joe Rogan?

  About prior than the week he did live at the Sunset Strip, that he was doing the same material at the store and bombing. And then bombing on Monday, Tuesday was better, Wednesday was better, Thursday was killing, Friday was killing, Saturday he's filming.

• 3:23:06Speaker 04

  I thought he bombed, wasn't, wasn't the story he bombed the first?

• 3:23:10Speaker 03

  The long beach, yeah. The long beach when he bombed.

• 3:23:12Speaker 04

  And then the second, second show he murdered, yeah.

• 3:23:15Speaker 03

  Best set ever.

• 3:23:15Speaker 02

  Dude, Adrienne, one of her sets, we decided to do a sabotage set.

• 3:23:18Speaker 04

  As much as I hate Tony, you love Adrienne.

• 3:23:20Speaker 02

  I do love Adrienne. Louis said we should do a sabotage set, we should just like not announce her, just like, let's see what the crowd is. They hated her so much. She was upstairs getting changed. I was outside, there was these British, like Indian people, they go, she deserves to get cancelled. It was just start to finish suck. She went through it like a warrior.

• 3:23:41Speaker 04

  She doesn't give a fuck.

• 3:23:41Speaker 02

  She does not. It's crazy.

• 3:23:43Joe Rogan?

  She talked about it on the podcast.

• 3:23:45Speaker 02

  Really? That's it?

• 3:23:45Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. The next night it was amazing.

• 3:23:48Speaker 02

  It was.

• 3:23:49Joe Rogan?

  She was like so worried.

• 3:23:50Speaker 04

  I would have been outside talking to the British Indian ladies like, I'm so sorry. She's up there just going, I don't give a fuck.

• 3:23:56Joe Rogan?

  I know.

• 3:23:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, they were, I heard them talking. I was like, Adrian, hang up, hang out upstairs for a second.

• 3:24:04Speaker 03

  You know what it's like? It's like a fighter who can take punches. Cause a good fighter can take a lot of punches and still win.

• 3:24:09Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 3:24:10Speaker 03

  A bad fighter's like, I'm getting punched. I'm out of here.

• 3:24:12Joe Rogan?

  Right, right, right, right. Real similar. It's a fun fucking time for comedy.

• 3:24:18Speaker 02

  It is a great time for comedy.

• 3:24:20Speaker 03

  Bad time for boxing.

• 3:24:21Joe Rogan?

  I always quote you, Ari. Cause you said comedy's dangerous.

• 3:24:23Speaker 02

  It is. Tony proves that. Oliver proves it.

• 3:24:26Speaker 03

  Tony proves it.

• 3:24:27Speaker 02

  It's danger. You do a joke. You're like, what are you mad at? I was just trying to entertain everybody. This disingenuous thing of like, well, they're trying to make people mad. No one's trying to make anyone mad. We're trying to entertain, but it gets people mad.

• 3:24:39Speaker 03

  Yeah, we don't want to offend anybody. We want to get laughs.

• 3:24:41Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. It's just, people love to distort things in this weird time where everything's politicized.

• 3:24:47Speaker 03

  I know.

• 3:24:47Joe Rogan?

  Even comedy's politicized. It should be like, oh, was he a comedian? Okay.

• 3:24:51Speaker 02

  But in the room, it's great. I mean, I remember doing a show with Shane shortly after the hubbub.

• 3:24:58Speaker 03

  The hullabaloo?

• 3:24:59Speaker 04

  That was really fun.

• 3:25:00Speaker 02

  That, dude, what, I have like seven or eight all time sets.

• 3:25:04Speaker 04

  Yeah, that was great.

• 3:25:05Speaker 02

  You gotta come up. My agent said I can't. Shane, come up.

• 3:25:09Speaker 04

  I would never said my agent said I can't.

• 3:25:10Speaker 02

  Somebody told you you weren't allowed.

• 3:25:12Speaker 03

  Becky.

• 3:25:13Speaker 04

  I don't.

• 3:25:13Joe Rogan?

  Where are you hearing this from?

• 3:25:15Speaker 04

  There's no way I would have ever said I'm not allowed.

• 3:25:17Speaker 02

  You said they told me I shouldn't. Like, just get him up here.

• 3:25:19Speaker 04

  I drove to the club.

• 3:25:20Speaker 02

  Yeah, you did.

• 3:25:21Speaker 03

  What are you talking about, Ari?

• 3:25:22Speaker 02

  But we came up and we, we had fun. We talked about it. And then we had an Asian guy rank the Asians. And we were saying like, the blogger in the room, which there was one.

• 3:25:32Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 3:25:33Speaker 02

  Would have said someone in the audience, an Asian guy, but they would have said someone in the audience ranked the Asian people.

• 3:25:39Speaker 03

  Oh, they didn't say he was Asian?

• 3:25:41Speaker 02

  Yeah, they didn't because we said it. We, we like cut their legs out. But it's just like, it's a bit dangerous and it makes it more fun.

• 3:25:48Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. You know, the funny thing was during the campaign when Obama was on, it was so surreal to watch. Obama was doing one of those campaign speeches and he said, there was a guy. At the Trump rally, who said Puerto Rico is an island filled with garbage?

• 3:26:03Speaker 02

  Time out, decent impression.

• 3:26:04Joe Rogan?

  Those are human beings. Those are human beings. They're like, what? A speaker?

• 3:26:10Speaker 03

  He's joking.

• 3:26:10Joe Rogan?

  It was a speaker? It wasn't a comedian? Wasn't a guy telling jokes?

• 3:26:15Speaker 03

  I mean, John Leguizamo went off. He did a whole face to camera.

• 3:26:19Speaker 02

  So there was a

• 3:26:19Joe Rogan?

  He's just trying to get a lot of attention.

• 3:26:22Speaker 02

  There was a visual artist who did a thing about, uh, who's that guy who got hung?

• 3:26:26Joe Rogan?

  He was John Wick. He always gets my respect.

• 3:26:29Speaker 02

  John Wick was great.

• 3:26:30Joe Rogan?

  He's always in John Wick. He gets a pass. He gets a pass. These people that are in like certain communities, they feel like they need to stand up and say something. They don't, they feel pressured. Everyone's scared, man. There's a bunch of fucking cowards out there. There's so many people that are scared and their takes on things are so gross.

• 3:26:47Speaker 02

  It's quick, it's not thought out.

• 3:26:49Joe Rogan?

  Fearful, just fearful, you know? It's weird. It's weird.

• 3:26:53Speaker 03

  That group thing really kicks up and you're like, I gotta say something. I gotta be a part. It's like, no you don't.

• 3:26:57Joe Rogan?

  Bill Maher putting the smackdown on Neil deGrasse Tyson the other day.

• 3:26:59Speaker 02

  What'd he say?

• 3:27:00Joe Rogan?

  Oh my goodness.

• 3:27:01Speaker 03

  Take that nerd.

• 3:27:02Joe Rogan?

  It was wonderful. Because it was making fun of Neil deGrasse Tyson's perspective on women competing with biological males in sports. Like all this woke shit you're doing, like, you're not a scientist. Like, this is not, this is not science that you're doing here. This is ridiculous.

• 3:27:17Speaker 03

  Well, people have been going at it. Dave Smith and Sam Harris are going at it.

• 3:27:20Joe Rogan?

  Are they really? Online right now, today?

• 3:27:22Speaker 03

  Well, Sam Harris did a podcast shitting on Dave. Dave did a rebuttal, then Sam did a rebuttal. I mean, it's like crazy.

• 3:27:31Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. So many people got captured during that time of chaos and anxiety. So many people got so captured. We lost, that's my joke. We lost a lot of people during COVID and most of them are still alive.

• 3:27:41Speaker 02

  That's so funny. I quote that so many times. I quote that so many times. It's one of those lines that are like funny, but like the point is real.

• 3:27:48Joe Rogan?

  There's a lot of people I really can't talk to anymore. I just can't.

• 3:27:52Speaker 03

  People don't realize, this is just a blip. It's all gonna go away. We're all in blue marble and we're so burning calories on this bullshit that goes away.

• 3:27:59Joe Rogan?

  Cowards are exposed. And people that are acting cowardice and they're not compassionate, they're not, you're not looking at things in a balanced, objective perspective, you know?

• 3:28:11Speaker 02

  Joey Diaz says one of my many hubbubs, somebody who's like, but Ari shouldn't have said this thing. Not even the one you're thinking of. And then he goes, yeah, but he's our friend. End of story.

• 3:28:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:28:22Speaker 02

  End of story. That's our friend.

• 3:28:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Yeah, it's like, the, the, it's, also, it's comedy. Comedy is messy, man. And anybody who doesn't think it's messy sucks at it. That's a fact. If you think that all jokes hit, you're doing whack jokes. There's no chance, if you're not offending anybody, like, were you not trying?

• 3:28:40Speaker 02

  You want, you gotta get to the line.

• 3:28:42Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:28:43Speaker 02

  You, you offend 2% of people, perfect. 98% are on your side, you're just, you're right on the line, perfect.

• 3:28:48Speaker 03

  And also, this is your lot in life? Like, you're the guy yelling at Elvis, "Hey, this is inappropriate", you're shaking your hips, like, this is the person you wanna be, at the end of the day? Like, we're all just joking around?

• 3:28:58Speaker 02

  Everyone's laughing, some people are not laughing, and you're mad.

• 3:29:02Joe Rogan?

  It's so much just ego, it's so much ego, it's so much people don't like other people getting attention, so much like people want other people to, like, support whatever narrative they support. Such a fucking, but it's a time of exposure, and cool people rise.

• 3:29:16Speaker 02

  Yeah. That's the thing, it's, it's a great time for us, so it's like-

• 3:29:19Joe Rogan?

  It's a great time, it's a challenging time, all challenging times are great times. As long as World War III doesn't pop off, and it doesn't become like, the end. It's like, we're basically at the Cuban Missile Crisis, but like, accelerated.

• 3:29:31Speaker 03

  With Twitter.

• 3:29:32Joe Rogan?

  With Twitter, and with Elon Musk.

• 3:29:34Speaker 02

  You guys gonna bong one or be cowards?

• 3:29:35Speaker 03

  And Blue Sky.

• 3:29:36Joe Rogan?

  What are you talking about, bitch?

• 3:29:36Speaker 02

  Are you guys gonna be Bluesky or not?

• 3:29:38Joe Rogan?

  I just took my fucking Lucy out, I'm ready to rock.

• 3:29:39Speaker 04

  No, it's Blue Sky, I'm so fucking dumb and old, I thought it was Bluesky.

• 3:29:43Joe Rogan?

  Bro, Blue Sky, if you go on there and you say there's only two genders, they ban you immediately.

• 3:29:49Speaker 02

  Mark, Mark, Mark, come on.

• 3:29:50Speaker 03

  I mean, I mean, I-

• 3:29:51Speaker 02

  I know, Mark, but I'm a s- I'm a s- I'm a s-

• 3:29:52Speaker 03

  I don't wanna puke at the mothership again, and then get-

• 3:29:55Speaker 02

  Alright, I don't think we're going to the mothership.

• 3:29:56Speaker 03

  Oh, we're not?

• 3:29:57Speaker 02

  We are.

• 3:29:58Speaker 03

  I thought we were doing sets?

• 3:29:59Speaker 02

  We are.

• 3:29:59Speaker 04

  Are we?

• 3:30:00Speaker 03

  You haven't been on stage since 88.

• 3:30:02Speaker 02

  I know.

• 3:30:02Joe Rogan?

  What are you, what are you playing there?

• 3:30:04Speaker 02

  Mark.

• 3:30:05Speaker 03

  Wait, are we going to the mothership or not?

• 3:30:06Speaker 02

  We are. Hundred percent, we are.

• 3:30:08Joe Rogan?

  We could do whatever we want, we're Americans.

• 3:30:09Speaker 04

  I think...

• 3:30:11Speaker 02

  I'll do it for you if you wanna do it, or you should do it.

• 3:30:14Speaker 04

  No, no, get Mark.

• 3:30:16Speaker 03

  I ate a big meal before I came here. I didn't. Just got one of those fair-

• 3:30:19Speaker 04

  I didn't eat anything.

• 3:30:20Speaker 03

  I had a string cheese and a bag of almonds. Oh, damn, that was quick.

• 3:30:27Speaker 02

  That was good.

• 3:30:28Joe Rogan?

  I ate two pounds of elk. Two pounds. I did, I had two sixteen ounce elk steaks.

• 3:30:34Speaker 02

  Really?

• 3:30:35Speaker 03

  No veggie?

• 3:30:36Joe Rogan?

  I don't eat veggies anymore.

• 3:30:37Speaker 03

  Gee, easy Jordan.

• 3:30:38Joe Rogan?

  If I want a salad, I'll eat it, you know, I'm not opposed to salads. If I feel like eating a salad, I eat it, but I don't think I need it for nutrition. I think it's nonsense.

• 3:30:47Speaker 03

  Good fiber for shitting.

• 3:30:48Joe Rogan?

  I don't think you need it.

• 3:30:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:30:50Speaker 02

  I love when people go, "I don't trust Joe Rogan in anything." I'm like, "Literally, he's my number one doctor source." It has been for twenty years.

• 3:30:57Joe Rogan?

  I'm a hundred years old and I'm strong as fuck. Trust me, I know what I'm doing.

• 3:31:01Speaker 04

  Charles Smith, daddy?

• 3:31:02Joe Rogan?

  Let's go. Let's go.

• 3:31:05Speaker 02

  Remember. Does this other man need him? A simple man don't need him around anyhow. Doesn't need him.

• 3:31:13Joe Rogan?

  I have a special. I have a special affection to this song after Neil Young went after me.

• 3:31:19Speaker 02

  Dude, that was so baller, where you're like, "Glad to see you have morals, Neil."

• 3:31:26Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, when he went back on Spotify.

• 3:31:28Speaker 02

  Oh, because the money's there? Oh, because the money's there, you'll do it?

• 3:31:30Joe Rogan?

  Also, I told him, and it's true, I was a giant Neil Young fan, and I literally, the last day I worked at Great Woods Performing Arts Center, I was at a Neil Young concert and a riot broke out, and I fucking threw a hoodie on over my security outfit, I'm like, "I'm out of here." I never got my last paycheck.

• 3:31:48Speaker 03

  Oh, wow.

• 3:31:48Joe Rogan?

  A fight broke out at a Neil Young concert.

• 3:31:50Speaker 02

  You're like, "Fuck this."

• 3:31:51Joe Rogan?

  Oh, it was crazy. My friend Larry punched some dude in the chest, and Larry is like, my friend Larry was like the Larry Jones, shout out to Larry Jones, one of the nicest guys ever, and this guy was fucking with him, and he just dropped this guy, and I was like, "Oh, my God, we're fighting, I'm out of here." And they left, and there was bonfires going on on the lawn, it was chaos, they shut the show down.

• 3:32:09Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 3:32:10Speaker 04

  That fucking Neil Young show, what was he doing?

• 3:32:13Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, nineteen eighty-nine. This is nineteen eighty-nine.

• 3:32:16Speaker 02

  Why people decide to go nuts, they go nuts.

• 3:32:19Joe Rogan?

  Well, you know what it was, it was cold, it was cold at night and it was the lawn, there was a whole lawn area and the lawn area was like, there was like an amphitheater and then that was covered and then above the outside, the covered area was a lawn area and the lawn area, a bunch of dudes started lighting like cardboard boxes on fire. It got crazy, they had bonfires going on and they were got, they got real rowdy. And then people were like starting shit with the security guys and then when my friend Larry dropped this guy, like fights broke out and I'm like, see ya. I'm like, I'm leaving. As long as my friends weren't actively in fights, I'm like, let's get out of here and everybody got out of there. I was like, I quit. I'm, I'm out of here. I just was ready to quit already. There was too many times where it was like almost fights. Some guy tried to run over me with his car.

• 3:33:03Speaker 03

  Whoa, what?

• 3:33:06Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:33:06Speaker 03

  What happened?

• 3:33:07Joe Rogan?

  I was telling the guy that he had to stop because we were like moving traffic around. The guy like got right up to my leg with his car and revved the engine and then I got up to his door and I go, hey man, fuck you. And he tried to open up his door and I kneed the shit out of his door and put a giant dent in his door. So he couldn't, couldn't open it and we were like ready to fight. I was like, dude, I'll fucking kill you. And he was like ready to get out of the car and I like kneed his car door and then a bunch of other security guys came up and he pulled, I'm like, what am I doing? I get like 20 to $5 an hour or something like that? I'm gonna get in fights? The first day on the job, they beat the fuck out of a guy who stole a golf cart. It was a dude named Alley Cat. He was the head guy that ran the security. He was like this grizzled old security dude, had probably been doing it forever.

• 3:33:49Joe Rogan?

  And they found this kid who was drunk, who stole one of our golf carts, a security cart, and he was driving around, they tackled him and they were beating him with a walkie talkie. Like beating him bloody, his face was bleeding and this was like my first day on the job. I was like, oh my god, like we're doing this? I was like, this is crazy.

• 3:34:09Speaker 03

  But didn't you, you were a jujitsu guy?

• 3:34:11Joe Rogan?

  Well, I was Taekwondo guy back then.

• 3:34:12Speaker 02

  Yeah, but you don't want to get dirty.

• 3:34:14Joe Rogan?

  No, I never got in fights. I never, I was the first guy to like, bye. I was like, I'm not interested in any fights.

• 3:34:19Speaker 03

  You didn't want to apply your knowledge?

• 3:34:21Joe Rogan?

  No, I applied it in the ring. I was not interested.

• 3:34:24Speaker 02

  It doesn't go on his record if he fights a rando.

• 3:34:25Joe Rogan?

  Well, it wasn't even that. It was just like, I knew how dangerous it was. It's like, once you've actually knocked people unconscious and you, it's scary. The whole thing's scary, like fighting people in a giant group, like fuck this.

• 3:34:37Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:34:37Joe Rogan?

  I didn't want to have nothing to do with that. But like, back then, the, the security team was all black belts. This guy, one of the guys that we worked out with, he got a job there and then he came to us and said, hey, you guys want a job? It's like 25 bucks an hour, you get to see concerts. I'm like, fuck yeah. I don't remember what the, I'm making 25 dollars up. I don't know what it was. And so there was like 16 of us.

• 3:34:58Speaker 03

  Oh wow.

• 3:34:58Joe Rogan?

  All these like assassins that like worked at this security place, but it was too crazy. You get to see how drunk people, and then it was also, when I understand cops, in a very minor way, because it became us against them. It was us, the security guard, again, the security guards against the people who were the, the drunks that were, and that was like a mentality.

• 3:35:20Speaker 03

  The way you're outnumbered.

• 3:35:21Joe Rogan?

  But it was also like a thought, like we are the good guys, they're the cunts, and it's okay to beat the fuck out of them with walkie talkies.

• 3:35:29Speaker 03

  Uh huh.

• 3:35:29Joe Rogan?

  And this is no internet, man. We're talking about 1989. This guy beat the fuck out of this guy with a walkie talkie in the face. Just beep, beep, beep, beep. Blood was splattering. He was getting fucked up. They rolled him over and tied him up. It was crazy. It was cra- and the tackle, I remember this guy getting tackled off of the fucking golf cart. The whole thing was nuts. I was like, oh Jesus, this is like not worth whatever I'm getting paid.

• 3:35:54Speaker 03

  And fighting is, you're like, you know, I've been beat up a few times in my day, but one time I jump kicked a guy in the stomach and he lost his, uh, he was like, and I felt horrible. I was like, ah geez, I don't want to be this guy.

• 3:36:09Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, even in fights, you feel horrible. The guy gets like pummeled. But it's like in the street, it's so, or in the world, it's so dangerous outside of a competition because no one's gonna stop that guy from stomping your fucking head when you're unconscious.

• 3:36:22Speaker 03

  Oof.

• 3:36:23Joe Rogan?

  There's no rules. There's no rules. No one's gonna stop some guy from biting your nose off. You don't know who you're fighting with. It's a crazy person. Gouging your eyes out. It's fucking dangerous. Like anybody who just wantonly engages in. Random violence with strangers. You're just asking to get maimed.

• 3:36:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:36:39Joe Rogan?

  Especially if you fuck up and run into some guy who actually knows how to fight. And I'm sure you've all seen those videos online. They're horrific. Some guy who doesn't know what he's doing and he just gets destroyed for the rest of his life. His life is gonna be fucked. His legs, he's gonna be limping forever. Cause some guy decided to snap his fucking femur in half.

• 3:36:59Speaker 03

  Ooh.

• 3:37:00Speaker 02

  Yeah, I would like, yeah.

• 3:37:01Joe Rogan?

  Scary shit, man.

• 3:37:02Speaker 03

  I went to LSU that there was this place called Tigerland. That's where all the bars were and these guys would fight, these big white guys in polo shirts and they would be on the cement like kicking each other in the face. It was brutal.

• 3:37:14Joe Rogan?

  Go to a gym, boys.

• 3:37:15Speaker 03

  Boat shoes on.

• 3:37:16Joe Rogan?

  Jesus Christ.

• 3:37:17Speaker 03

  Rail on a guy.

• 3:37:18Joe Rogan?

  Go to a gym, boys. Cause he's so dan- Kevin James was working as a, a bouncer at a bar and the guy he was working with killed somebody and went to jail.

• 3:37:26Speaker 03

  Jesus.

• 3:37:27Joe Rogan?

  He knocked the guy out. He got in a fight with some drunk guy, knocked him out. The guy fell down, hit his head, died.

• 3:37:33Speaker 03

  Oof.

• 3:37:34Speaker 02

  Gotta go roadhouse.

• 3:37:35Joe Rogan?

  All the time.

• 3:37:36Speaker 02

  Don't fight back.

• 3:37:36Joe Rogan?

  When you KO a guy and they fall, they get hit with the earth. Bang. That's your fucking head. Your whole body. All your fucking la- all that torque, bang, on your head.

• 3:37:47Speaker 02

  So I got sag it.

• 3:37:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, true.

• 3:37:51Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:37:53Joe Rogan?

  Blacked, blacked out and hit his head.

• 3:37:55Speaker 03

  That's right.

• 3:37:55Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. I mean, fucking, it's a horrible way to go, man. Hitting your head on that one, what was that girl's name? Which was joking around.

• 3:38:01Speaker 03

  Heather McDonald.

• 3:38:02Joe Rogan?

  Heather McDonald, when she was joking around about the vaccine and then blacked out on stage and bangs her head.

• 3:38:06Speaker 02

  It was so fu- it was so great because that was an unintentional, solid joke.

• 3:38:11Joe Rogan?

  It was the universe telling a joke.

• 3:38:13Speaker 02

  I don't give a fuck. And then it fucking passes out. It was like, that is a good joke, unintended.

• 3:38:18Speaker 03

  Right now?

• 3:38:18Joe Rogan?

  It was the universe. The universe was telling us everything was fucked up. What she was saying was fucked up. It was almost like God was like, you're not getting away with this. We're gonna, we're gonna make a video. Bang.

• 3:38:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, that was the pandemic time. It was like the Will Smith slap, that whole thing, Bob Saget. Those were wacky couple of years.

• 3:38:37Speaker 02

  Smith slap was wild.

• 3:38:39Joe Rogan?

  It was all so crazy. Like everybody lost their fucking minds. But we got Chris Rock back.

• 3:38:44Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:38:44Joe Rogan?

  We got Chris Rock back from that.

• 3:38:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:38:46Joe Rogan?

  Right? Chris Rock became Chris Rock again. He went hard again. He was doing like Oscar friendly stuff, you know? He was trying to like be in with these. He wanted to be Kevin Hart, wanted to be a movie star, wanted to do all those things he was doing.

• 3:38:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, Chris Rock between two Oscars-ish or whatever, Golden Globes, was like hard, where he took some abuse for it, and then like, alright, let me just go light, and now back to real Chris Rock.

• 3:39:06Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you don't want that dude mad at you. And then a whole year to stew and write a bit about you.

• 3:39:10Speaker 03

  A live special, too. That was a big one. Oh yeah, Chappelle, too. He got that whole thing on the Hollywood Bowl.

• 3:39:19Joe Rogan?

  I think everybody should do a live one once. You should all do a live one. It's fun. It's weird.

• 3:39:23Speaker 02

  How'd you feel about it?

• 3:39:24Joe Rogan?

  Fun. Ready. I just prepared like way more than I ever would have prepared.

• 3:39:29Speaker 02

  I mean, you're a club comic, so I was like ideally suited for it.

• 3:39:32Joe Rogan?

  What do you mean?

• 3:39:33Speaker 02

  Club comics are used to dealing with all sorts of like stuff. Theater comics, like, it's all set up well.

• 3:39:40Joe Rogan?

  Right, right, right, right, right. For chaos, but there was very little chaos. There was only one guy yelled something out, but it was fun. It was, uh, I was ready. I just made sure I was ready. So, and also it's nice because you don't have to edit.

• 3:39:52Speaker 02

  Oh, less work.

• 3:39:53Speaker 03

  Editing is a bitch.

• 3:39:54Joe Rogan?

  Editing could suck my dick.

• 3:39:55Speaker 03

  You gotta watch yourself, ugh.

• 3:39:57Joe Rogan?

  Editing, ugh. I watched myself from Friday night, too. That helped because I hated it. Even though I killed, I filmed Friday night first, so I got to see that and I watched. I was like, ugh, blah. It's awful. I've seen it too many times. It's like you don't, you don't, you lose everything. What's funny, what's not. But I was, but Friday night killed. So I was like, look, we already got it in the can. When Saturday Night rolls around, I'm fine.

• 3:40:20Speaker 03

  Get loose.

• 3:40:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I was loose as fuck. I smoked a joint, had a drink.

• 3:40:24Speaker 03

  Damn, smoking a joint.

• 3:40:25Joe Rogan?

  I felt normal. I felt like a normal show.

• 3:40:27Speaker 02

  And that is where comedy is, where it's like, hey, hey, guys, I'm here.

• 3:40:31Joe Rogan?

  It was fun, and the audience was awesome, so it was easy. It was fun.

• 3:40:35Speaker 03

  San Antonio is a great comedy town.

• 3:40:36Joe Rogan?

  Oh, they were so happy. It was, it's a fun place. Texas is just, Texas is just fun, period. It's a wild place.

• 3:40:43Speaker 02

  Texas.

• 3:40:43Speaker 04

  Yeah, Texas rules.

• 3:40:44Joe Rogan?

  I always used to think that about Houston. I always used to love going to Arlington Improv.

• 3:40:49Speaker 02

  Texas, Florida, Colorado.

• 3:40:51Speaker 03

  Denver.

• 3:40:51Joe Rogan?

  Denver's awesome.

• 3:40:52Speaker 02

  It's just like, yeah. Martin Chill. Phoenix.

• 3:40:55Speaker 03

  Phoenix.

• 3:40:55Speaker 02

  Arizona.

• 3:40:55Joe Rogan?

  It's always fun.

• 3:40:56Speaker 02

  Gun people are cool.

• 3:40:57Joe Rogan?

  Philly's fun. There's some good ones. Yeah, there's places where people like to party. They're fun. They're fun people.

• 3:41:04Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:41:04Joe Rogan?

  Comedy's better than it's ever been before, man. It'd be starting to think about how many guys are killing it out there right now. How many, I mean, there's more top level comics than ever.

• 3:41:11Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 3:41:12Joe Rogan?

  More guys doing arenas than ever. Bargatze, Segura, Burt, you guys, Shane.

• 3:41:18Speaker 02

  I went to see Shane at the fucking, where the, how can 76ers play?

• 3:41:22Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:41:23Speaker 02

  We went, me, you and O'Connor went into the, and, and maybe Jay, I think?

• 3:41:26Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:41:27Speaker 02

  Went into the back, Jerome doesn't care about sports, but like, but like, you could smell the hockey jerseys.

• 3:41:32Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:41:33Speaker 02

  They're like, yeah, we haven't watched this yet.

• 3:41:34Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:41:35Speaker 02

  And it's like, but even the theater, even the, the, the club comics are like more than ever.

• 3:41:40Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:41:40Speaker 02

  The Jeff Osmesses or above.

• 3:41:42Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:41:43Speaker 02

  Are like, yeah, there's a ton.

• 3:41:44Speaker 03

  Well, the internet. You have the internet now.

• 3:41:46Speaker 02

  You can find some of the quality.

• 3:41:47Speaker 03

  Exposure.

• 3:41:48Joe Rogan?

  Like, I was talking to Tyler Fisher about this the other day. Someone offered him a deal to do some kind of a special and something. And I was like, listen, man, just put it on YouTube. Just put it on, you want to get people to see you. Whatever money they're paying you, you would pay 10 times more that for the exposure to be on YouTube. It's more, 100 times more valuable. Just put it on the YouTube.

• 3:42:06Speaker 03

  YouTube can get a little queefy with the censor.

• 3:42:09Joe Rogan?

  But people will share it. They'll share it.

• 3:42:12Speaker 02

  Yeah, they got Fahim, they got Joe List.

• 3:42:15Speaker 03

  Yeah, Joe List said cunt.

• 3:42:16Speaker 02

  They got Fahim.

• 3:42:18Joe Rogan?

  What'd they do with Fahim?

• 3:42:19Speaker 02

  They, they, once they decide wrong, they go, stop sharing it. And then the, the growth just stops.

• 3:42:25Speaker 03

  Cause computers are watching. It's like AI shit, which is a filter.

• 3:42:28Speaker 02

  They're asking you to like change your stuff.

• 3:42:28Joe Rogan?

  Well, I think it's also people flagging it. I think it's people flagging it.

• 3:42:32Speaker 03

  Who's flagging Fahim?

• 3:42:33Joe Rogan?

  Assholes.

• 3:42:34Speaker 02

  That was Joe List.

• 3:42:35Joe Rogan?

  Assholes. Dude, assholes. People don't like Louis CK. They know Louis CK's friends with Joe List. Dude, trust me, assholes flag it. You say cunt, they're gonna flag it. You say, whatever you say.

• 3:42:45Speaker 02

  So it used to be, you say a word, whatever, and they go, hey, that's a flag. And they go, and they go, hey, no, that's a stand-up, so it's okay.

• 3:42:52Speaker 03

  Come on.

• 3:42:52Speaker 02

  You guys are alone. Uh, go suck each other's dicks in their fucking bathroom.

• 3:42:56Speaker 03

  Alright, I'm listening. Put it down, baby.

• 3:42:59Speaker 02

  Before I go. Plugs.

• 3:43:02Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 3:43:03Speaker 02

  Mark Pluggedets always shoot.

• 3:43:04Speaker 03

  Yeah, do it, boys. Check out Paige's Stage on PunchUp.com. Mark Norman Comedy, Mark Norman slash PunchUp or PunchUp slash Mark Norman.

• 3:43:13Speaker 02

  Do you put two of them?

• 3:43:14Speaker 03

  Paige's Stage.

• 3:43:14Speaker 02

  No, but one.

• 3:43:15Speaker 03

  Ari's on there too. Larry Davis on there. Joe List, Sam Morril, all the guy, Michelle Wolf, all on PunchUp. I said your name.

• 3:43:21Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 3:43:22Speaker 03

  And, uh, yeah, check out Ari's. You got a new special coming out. You got Adrian's special. You got...

• 3:43:27Speaker 02

  January 14th will be my new special, America's Sweetheart on Netflix. Also, they are picking up Jew, the first YouTube to Netflix special of all time.

• 3:43:36Speaker 03

  I didn't know that.

• 3:43:37Speaker 02

  Will be in May-ish.

• 3:43:38Speaker 03

  Hell, yeah.

• 3:43:39Speaker 02

  Not official date yet. Also Pittsburgh with Adrian, uh, Atlanta, Tahoe, Vancouver, Calgary, Edmonton, Portland, bunch of, San Antonio, San Jose, a bunch of other stuff. arishaffir.com for tickets. All new hour. Then I'm done till 2017.

• 3:43:56Speaker 03

  Uh, get some bodega cat. I am, uh, in New Orleans for Thanksgiving. Tickets are horrific. Please come to the Orpheum. And, uh, we might be drunk. You, you be tripping.

• 3:44:07Speaker 02

  You be tripping in my new travel box. Norman's the only guest that's been on there twice?

• 3:44:11Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's an honor and a pleasure.

• 3:44:14Speaker 02

  Um, I gotta go, I gotta go back and we might be drunk for the special.

• 3:44:18Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah. Come back. You just did the Adrian show.

• 3:44:20Speaker 02

  I did the Adrian one, but I always do one of my own.

• 3:44:21Speaker 03

  Every comment is her again.

• 3:44:23Speaker 02

  Oh, because it's non-stop all week.

• 3:44:25Speaker 03

  She's on Legion Skank. She's on that.

• 3:44:27Speaker 02

  That was a good one, though.

• 3:44:28Speaker 03

  That was fun. That was fun.

• 3:44:30Speaker 02

  We did Skank's, me and Adrian, and at some point we just sat back and watched Jay be funny.

• 3:44:34Speaker 03

  Jay is so fucking funny.

• 3:44:35Speaker 02

  Let's just enjoy this.

• 3:44:36Speaker 03

  He can really talk.

• 3:44:37Speaker 02

  God damn.

• 3:44:39Speaker 03

  He can run. He can roll.

• 3:44:40Joe Rogan?

  He's a natural, ladies and gentlemen.

• 3:44:42Speaker 02

  And you want to join in, but you're like, actually, take the stage.

• 3:44:44Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, I'll ruin it.

• 3:44:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:44:46Joe Rogan?

  That's the thing, right? It's like finding a way, like you gotta know when to step in and when to lay back.

• 3:44:51Speaker 03

  It's pretty cool. We know some of the funniest people out there.

• 3:44:53Speaker 02

  And Louis will give you a joint.

• 3:44:55Joe Rogan?

  Like we talk about the hang. It's like, you know, it's the most important thing in, in life is the hang in the green room.

• 3:45:01Speaker 03

  Hell, yeah.

• 3:45:02Joe Rogan?

  It's the most fun.

• 3:45:03Speaker 02

  It's what everyone wonders what's the green room like and you're like, yeah, exactly what you think.

• 3:45:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:45:08Speaker 02

  It's a barrel of laughs.

• 3:45:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:45:10Speaker 02

  I'll fucking kill you, bro.

• 3:45:12Joe Rogan?

  It's kinda like a podcast every night.

• 3:45:13Speaker 02

  And then we're all friends.

• 3:45:14Joe Rogan?

  But darker. It's a podcast every night, yeah, but way more. You can go far.

• 3:45:18Speaker 03

  Way further.

• 3:45:19Joe Rogan?

  Go far.

• 3:45:20Speaker 03

  There's no one listening.

• 3:45:22Speaker 04

  You just dosed me.

• 3:45:23Speaker 02

  Cause you can keep up.

• 3:45:24Speaker 04

  I still won and you dosed me.

• 3:45:26Joe Rogan?

  I dosing.

• 3:45:26Speaker 02

  Again.

• 3:45:27Speaker 03

  He did he.

• 3:45:29Speaker 04

  He dosed me.

• 3:45:30Joe Rogan?

  You son of a bitch.

• 3:45:31Speaker 03

  He did he.

• 3:45:32Speaker 02

  I put like, I put like 10% of mine in the ears.

• 3:45:35Joe Rogan?

  I could tell. I was like, it should be done.

• 3:45:36Speaker 02

  I had 90%, you 110%.

• 3:45:39Speaker 03

  Should we get some food at some point or is that crazy? Maybe a little din din?

• 3:45:44Speaker 04

  I, I don't know. Every time we go out after this, I'm always, I don't know, I don't love it.

• 3:45:49Speaker 03

  What do you mean steak?

• 3:45:50Speaker 04

  We go out to dinner after this? I feel like a fucking alien.

• 3:45:53Speaker 02

  What do you mean alien?

• 3:45:54Joe Rogan?

  Cause we're walking through the.

• 3:45:55Speaker 04

  Blacked out.

• 3:45:55Joe Rogan?

  We're going to a fucking restaurant.

• 3:45:57Speaker 02

  I've got a suggestion.

• 3:45:58Joe Rogan?

  That's a good point.

• 3:45:59Speaker 04

  Yeah, every time we go out to eat, I go, what the fuck?

• 3:46:02Speaker 02

  Let's stop by the supermarket, get some steak, go to Shane's house and grill him.

• 3:46:05Speaker 03

  That's a lot of work.

• 3:46:06Speaker 04

  That actually would be awesome.

• 3:46:07Speaker 02

  Yeah, let's live like regular people.

• 3:46:09Joe Rogan?

  Let's go to a fucking restaurant dressed up like the Jaguar people.

• 3:46:14Speaker 04

  Overalls.

• 3:46:14Joe Rogan?

  I actually agree with that.

• 3:46:17Speaker 03

  Front row of a Brooklyn audience.

• 3:46:19Speaker 02

  We're supposed to have program stuff for this. What happened to our costumes?

• 3:46:21Joe Rogan?

  I wanna get a yellow nylon zoot suit.

• 3:46:24Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 3:46:26Speaker 02

  Are we doing Mar-a-Lago?

• 3:46:27Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, we have to.

• 3:46:29Speaker 02

  We have to.

• 3:46:29Joe Rogan?

  We have to. We helped Trump get elected.

• 3:46:31Speaker 02

  Yo, I got a special shoot January 14th. Are we doing, uh?

• 3:46:34Speaker 03

  Let's do blow with Don Jr.

• 3:46:35Speaker 02

  When do you finish shooting?

• 3:46:36Joe Rogan?

  Oh, well, maybe we, maybe we do that at Mar-a-Lago.

• 3:46:41Speaker 02

  Ooh.

• 3:46:43Joe Rogan?

  No, we have to wait until he gets in. We have to wait until he gets in.

• 3:46:46Speaker 04

  Trump's obviously gonna walk on, dude.

• 3:46:47Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:46:47Speaker 04

  There's a camera, the bro.

• 3:46:49Joe Rogan?

  100%. He's gonna walk on if we do Mar-a-Lago.

• 3:46:51Speaker 02

  Let's do it and play it day after, play the day after, uh, or right then.

• 3:46:55Joe Rogan?

  We talked about it on the podcast and Don Jr. Reached out to me. He said I can make that happen.

• 3:47:00Speaker 02

  I posted, I posted a supportive Tony Hinchcliffe and Don Jr. Was like, I love it.

• 3:47:04Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 3:47:08Speaker 02

  We can make it happen. Don Jr.

• 3:47:09Joe Rogan?

  Isn't it interesting that like, like John Jones defends the heavyweight title? John Jones defends the heavyweight title and then does the Trump dance?

• 3:47:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:47:19Joe Rogan?

  And then gives his belt to Trump. Like, the world's changed. Like, everything's flipped.

• 3:47:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:47:23Speaker 03

  Completely.

• 3:47:23Joe Rogan?

  It's completely flipped.

• 3:47:24Speaker 02

  And what's lost is, John Jones is the greatest fighter of all time.

• 3:47:28Speaker 03

  He's a gladiator.

• 3:47:29Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he's the best.

• 3:47:31Speaker 03

  I mean, the NFL guys are doing it.

• 3:47:32Joe Rogan?

  It's hard to say he's not the best, and I know he didn't beat Tom Aspinall. He hasn't fought Tom Aspinall yet.

• 3:47:38Speaker 03

  Tom's great.

• 3:47:39Speaker 02

  There's always one guy, but it's like, he's beating that guy over and over and over again. Dro- dropping somebody, fucking fuck off.

• 3:47:46Joe Rogan?

  He's never fought a guy like Tom. Tom's different.

• 3:47:48Speaker 02

  Tom's gonna be a problem, and...

• 3:47:49Joe Rogan?

  He's a giant dude. He's a legitimate heavyweight. He might fight whoever he wants to fight. John Jones could do whatever the fuck he wants to do right now. If I imagined what's actually happening, though, I'd imagine he's saying he's not gonna fight Tom Aspinall, although he's probably training for Tom Aspinall. He wants to ramp up the amount of money that he can get.

• 3:48:08Speaker 03

  Ah, smart.

• 3:48:08Joe Rogan?

  Which is a smart thing to do, because it might be the last time he fights.

• 3:48:11Speaker 02

  Also underrated, what nobody says about John Jones, is he has, of all the UFC fighters ever met, the highest weed tolerance of anybody, and no one's talking about it.

• 3:48:18Speaker 03

  And booze and coke.

• 3:48:19Speaker 02

  He does four times the weed Joe does, four, five times the weed I do.

• 3:48:23Speaker 03

  Really?

• 3:48:24Speaker 02

  And is like a champion on airplanes. I bet Nate...

• 3:48:26Speaker 03

  Allegedly.

• 3:48:27Speaker 02

  Nate Diaz can get after it.

• 3:48:28Speaker 03

  Allegedly.

• 3:48:29Speaker 02

  Bring it. Nate vs. John Weed?

• 3:48:31Joe Rogan?

  I bet John's still more coherent.

• 3:48:33Speaker 02

  Dana, bring it. Nate vs. John Weed. We all wanna see it.

• 3:48:36Speaker 03

  Let's do that.

• 3:48:39Joe Rogan?

  Did you guys ever see, um, what was that, uh, jujitsu competition? What was it called? Where they would, uh... High rollers? High rollers. So they would get super baked, and then they would have jujitsu competitions. So they'd smoke together.

• 3:48:51Speaker 02

  By the way, that's Eddie's class. That's Eddie's class every day.

• 3:48:54Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it is. It is a little bit. That's Matt. My friend Matt put it together. And so, uh, he set this thing up. I think it was California where it was legal, so they all get super duper high, and then they would fight.

• 3:49:07Speaker 04

  I love it.

• 3:49:08Joe Rogan?

  They should just do matches. It was awesome.

• 3:49:10Speaker 04

  They should do that Coke version.

• 3:49:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that would be good. Did you guys see that study that they funded? I posted it on my Instagram where they gave, uh, was it gerbils or hamsters? They gave hamsters cocaine and steroids and had them fight and like studied it. Was it hamsters?

• 3:49:26Speaker 04

  Who's doing that study?

• 3:49:27Joe Rogan?

  Our government, our government.

• 3:49:28Speaker 03

  A fifth grader?

• 3:49:30Joe Rogan?

  Our government's a bunch of.

• 3:49:31Speaker 04

  That sounds like science fair.

• 3:49:32Speaker 03

  That's a good time.

• 3:49:33Joe Rogan?

  Bunch of nerds with an unlimited budget.

• 3:49:35Speaker 03

  Hell yeah.

• 3:49:37Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:49:37Speaker 04

  Supposedly serious scientists.

• 3:49:39Joe Rogan?

  Northeastern University of Boston for decades. I think they spent three million dollars on this, by the way.

• 3:49:42Speaker 04

  Supposedly serious scientists at Northeastern University.

• 3:49:45Joe Rogan?

  Look at my quote here. The government spent three million dollars funding a study where they injected hamsters with steroids and cocaine and had them fight a completely ridiculous and unethical study, but I would like to see the data. I want to see the data.

• 3:49:59Speaker 03

  This is why the terrorists hate us.

• 3:50:00Joe Rogan?

  Bro, they hopped them up on cocaine and roids and they had them go to war. Because they were probably trying to figure out what's the best way to make a soldier.

• 3:50:08Speaker 04

  Oh, right.

• 3:50:09Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:50:10Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 3:50:10Joe Rogan?

  I would do that. Like, you know, I've had conversations with like. Yeah, exactly. Well, also I've had conversations with like special forces guys and they're like, you don't want to like ask, is everybody doing steroids? But, uh, one of them said, whatever that soldier needs to do to make him the best soldier, I am all in on that.

• 3:50:28Speaker 04

  You know what fucked me up? One of the guys in the SEALs, I was asking him about that and I was like, you guys should all do steroids. What the fuck? Who gives a fuck? And he was like, yeah, but then you're out and you get stuck out there.

• 3:50:39Joe Rogan?

  And you run out.

• 3:50:40Speaker 04

  And you run out and now you have a guy fucking falling apart. And I was like, oh shit.

• 3:50:44Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 3:50:44Speaker 04

  I didn't even think about that.

• 3:50:45Joe Rogan?

  That's a very good point.

• 3:50:46Speaker 04

  Cause.

• 3:50:47Joe Rogan?

  She should carry steroids.

• 3:50:48Speaker 04

  I was like, yeah, you guys.

• 3:50:48Joe Rogan?

  Everywhere you go.

• 3:50:49Speaker 04

  They should all be fucking on steroids.

• 3:50:51Joe Rogan?

  Just keep steroids with you. Just have like a fucking box that can't be like a bulletproof box with testosterone in it and a fucking bag of needles that's attached to your hips. Let's go. Let's go.

• 3:51:01Speaker 04

  Cause they'll, yeah, I was like, make them. The most roided out freak of all time.

• 3:51:06Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, when you see these people that are talking about like non-binary folks in the fucking military. And then you see China and they're doing bear crawls off hills.

• 3:51:14Speaker 04

  Ah.

• 3:51:14Joe Rogan?

  Have you seen that video of the Chinese military doing bear crawls up a giant hill?

• 3:51:19Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 3:51:20Joe Rogan?

  That, you ever do, you ever do that workout? You ever do a bear crawl?

• 3:51:23Speaker 04

  I've done a bear crawl, it sucks.

• 3:51:24Joe Rogan?

  Bro, that's not fun. It looks way easier than it is.

• 3:51:27Speaker 04

  It's so hard.

• 3:51:28Joe Rogan?

  It's not hard, I mean, it's not easy to do at all, but it looks easy. Like, I can walk on my hands and knees, easy. Shut the fuck up.

• 3:51:34Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 3:51:34Joe Rogan?

  And then you do like five steps and you're like, oh my god, my shoulders are shaking.

• 3:51:38Speaker 03

  Is that feet and hands?

• 3:51:39Joe Rogan?

  You're walking.

• 3:51:40Speaker 04

  Yeah, but your weight's all on your.

• 3:51:42Joe Rogan?

  You're going like this. Your, your weight's all on your feet and your hands. It's really hard.

• 3:51:46Speaker 04

  You know what really blows? Duck walks.

• 3:51:48Joe Rogan?

  Oh yeah, those suck. Those suck.

• 3:51:50Speaker 04

  That's like a real O-line fuck. Where'd you piss?

• 3:51:52Joe Rogan?

  Well, you know, when we do our comedy workouts, I always make sure that everybody does those, uh, those deep squats.

• 3:51:58Speaker 04

  Except Brian Simpson. He's like, I'm getting tired.

• 3:52:00Joe Rogan?

  Brian Simpson does them.

• 3:52:01Speaker 04

  Simpson does well. The only thing he bitches out on is the sauna.

• 3:52:04Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:52:04Speaker 04

  That's my joy.

• 3:52:05Joe Rogan?

  I've never seen anyone. We get that sauna hot, son.

• 3:52:09Speaker 04

  No, that, his sauna blows.

• 3:52:11Joe Rogan?

  I get that sauna up to one ninety-six.

• 3:52:12Speaker 04

  I know. I watch all you guys come and go while I'm sitting in there.

• 3:52:15Joe Rogan?

  Let's fucking go.

• 3:52:17Speaker 04

  Um, come on, man. Can I, I was at a McCuska show, we met some SEALs.

• 3:52:21Speaker 03

  Oh yeah?

• 3:52:22Speaker 04

  And, uh.

• 3:52:23Joe Rogan?

  Er, er, er.

• 3:52:24Speaker 04

  They go, uh, hey, I was in, I was in, uh, Yemen.

• 3:52:27Joe Rogan?

  What did they say?

• 3:52:33Speaker 03

  Beach balls?

• 3:52:34Joe Rogan?

  Mark Knopfler, when you're such an important part of the show.

• 3:52:36Speaker 04

  Because I was in Yemen and, uh, I was undercover, whatever, embedded. And then I went to have to do a.

• 3:52:42Speaker 03

  Look at these dudes.

• 3:52:42Joe Rogan?

  Have you ever done that?

• 3:52:43Speaker 03

  Oh, that's hard.

• 3:52:44Joe Rogan?

  This is it. This is it right here.

• 3:52:45Speaker 03

  Oh, they're going up and down. That's the hard part. This is like a meme in China. I don't know about the military doing it.

• 3:52:50Joe Rogan?

  Oh no, I saw some military guys doing it.

• 3:52:51Speaker 03

  I know, I Googled it. I'm not seeing.

• 3:52:53Speaker 04

  These guys are fucking killing it anyway.

• 3:52:55Speaker 02

  It's pretty cool looking.

• 3:52:56Joe Rogan?

  That's hard to do, man. Whoever those guys are, we can't find enough Americans to do that.

• 3:53:00Speaker 03

  Hey, Kool-Aid.

• 3:53:01Speaker 04

  Show the elephant walk that America's doing.

• 3:53:03Joe Rogan?

  Do we have enough American, yeah, the elephant walk into McDonald's following Donald Trump's lead?

• 3:53:08Speaker 03

  Well, I guess it's eighty people that do it. They were just a bunch of nerds.

• 3:53:10Joe Rogan?

  Bro, that is so hard to do. The average age is fifty.

• 3:53:14Speaker 03

  Whoa, that's crazy.

• 3:53:16Speaker 02

  That means if somebody's sixty-eight years old.

• 3:53:18Speaker 04

  How old these Asians are?

• 3:53:19Joe Rogan?

  You know what's crazy though? Like Chinese military.

• 3:53:21Speaker 03

  Asians don't raise them.

• 3:53:23Joe Rogan?

  Our ads are doing these fucking, these silly fucking inclusive things about the military. Their ads are trying to make Chinese men more masculine, like everything is more masculine.

• 3:53:34Speaker 02

  That's a fucking uphill climb.

• 3:53:36Speaker 03

  I think we're gonna flip though. I think that those days are over.

• 3:53:38Joe Rogan?

  I think they're over too. I think people realize how fucking dangerous it is to project this fucking insanity to the whole world.

• 3:53:45Speaker 02

  We never played that Trump fucking thing on the internet.

• 3:53:47Speaker 04

  It's alright. It's not that great. It's him giving a cool speech.

• 3:53:50Speaker 02

  It got me riled up.

• 3:53:52Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Find that, Jamie. I think I posted it. I posted it on my Instagram.

• 3:53:56Speaker 02

  You did? Okay, cool.

• 3:53:58Joe Rogan?

  Go to my Instagram, Jamie, and you'll find it, because it's also with the words. So it's tran- the transcript is on the screen with them.

• 3:54:04Speaker 02

  If you don't want it, we don't have to.

• 3:54:05Joe Rogan?

  No, we're gonna do it.

• 3:54:06Speaker 04

  We want it, we want it.

• 3:54:06Joe Rogan?

  No, it's, you're right.

• 3:54:07Speaker 04

  You want it, you want it.

• 3:54:08Joe Rogan?

  It's super important. We have all the time in the world, man. We're Americans. We're Americans and Trump's the president.

• 3:54:13Speaker 03

  There ain't any army.

• 3:54:14Joe Rogan?

  Start from the beginning and give me a little volume. Sorry.

• 3:54:18Speaker 03

  Every time it, I can't.

• 3:54:18Joe Rogan?

  I know, I understand. Okay, go ahead. Go ahead. It's okay.

• 3:54:21Speaker 03

  Damn, Brolin's handsome.

• 3:54:23Joe Rogan?

  He's a beautiful man.

• 3:54:24Speaker 05

  Then we just don't have a free country. It's as simple as that. If this most fundamental right is allowed to perish, then the rest of our rights and liberties will topple, just like dominoes, one by one, they'll go down.

• 3:54:38Speaker 04

  Domino's Pizza, great pizza.

• 3:54:42Speaker 05

  Shatter the left-wing censorship regime and to reclaim the right to free speech.

• 3:54:47Speaker 02

  Jamie, comment right now, live.

• 3:54:49Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, hold on.

• 3:54:51Speaker 05

  It's a very important word in this case, because they've taken it away. In recent weeks, bombshell reports have confirmed that a sinister group of deep state bureaucrats, Silicon Valley tyrants, left-wing activists, and depraved corporate news media have been conspiring to manipulate and silence the American people. They have collaborated to suppress vital information. ...information on everything from elections to public health. The censorship cartel must be dismantled and destroyed, and it must happen immediately. And here is my plan. First, within hours of my inauguration, I will sign an executive order banning any

• 3:55:36Speaker 05

  federal department or agency from colluding with any organization, business, or person to censor, limit, categorize, or impede the lawful speech of American citizens. I will then ban federal money from being used to label domestic speech as "mis" or "disinformation." And I will begin the process of identifying and firing every federal

• 3:56:01Speaker 04

  Wow.

• 3:56:02Speaker 05

  ...who has engaged in domestic censorship, directly or indirectly, whether they are the Department of Homeland Security,

• 3:56:10Speaker 04

  Should.

• 3:56:11Speaker 05

  the Department of Health, Human Services, the FBI, the DOJ, no matter who they are. Second, I will order the Department of Justice to investigate all parties involved in the new online censorship regime, which is absolutely destructive and terrible, and to aggressively prosecute any and all crimes identified. These include possible violations of federal civil rights law, campaign finance laws, federal election law, securities law, and antitrust laws, the Hatch Act, and a host of other potential criminal, civil, regulatory, and constitutional offenses.

• 3:56:53Speaker 05

  To assist in these efforts, I am urging House Republicans to immediately send preservation letters, and we have to do this right now, to the Biden administration, the Biden campaign, and every Silicon Valley tech giant, ordering them not to destroy evidence of censorship. Third, upon my inauguration as President, I will ask Congress to send a bill

• 3:57:17Speaker 03

  Million likes.

• 3:57:19Speaker 05

  ...revising Section 230 to get big online platforms

• 3:57:23Speaker 04

  230.

• 3:57:24Speaker 05

  ...out of censorship business.

• 3:57:25Speaker 04

  What time does an Asian go to the doctor?

• 3:57:27Speaker 03

  2:30.

• 3:57:28Speaker 04

  The dentist's fuck. I'm dumb as shit.

• 3:57:35Speaker 05

  Transparency, fairness, and non-discrimination. We should require these platforms to increase their efforts to take down

• 3:57:44Speaker 03

  Look at Jama with all the tabs.

• 3:57:45Speaker 05

  ... content such as

• 3:57:46Speaker 03

  Leonard Skidder and Stupid Wolf.

• 3:57:48Speaker 05

  ... exploitation and promoting terrorism while dramatically curtailing their power to arbitrarily restrict lawful speech. Fourth, we need to up the entire

• 3:57:58Speaker 03

  Alright, you good already?

• 3:57:59Joe Rogan?

  Okay, we get it.

• 3:58:00Speaker 03

  You good? You got it?

• 3:58:01Joe Rogan?

  We got it.

• 3:58:01Speaker 02

  I don't, I don't care if you don't like this guy, you can't be against this.

• 3:58:05Joe Rogan?

  That's a progressive idea.

• 3:58:06Speaker 02

  It's progressive.

• 3:58:07Speaker 03

  Ooh!

• 3:58:08Joe Rogan?

  That is.

• 3:58:08Speaker 02

  You have to be able to go, "I'm against 95% of them, this part is okay."

• 3:58:12Joe Rogan?

  If you're not, if you're not with that, you're not with free speech, so you're not with free discourse. You, you want to be right. None of it makes any sense. There's no logical explanation that you could possibly provide that would say that censoring speech by a bunch of people that have known, been known to be liars and criminals. Like, like letting those people censor speech is crazy. You're, you're letting people influence people with billions of dollars. You're letting people that are engaged in really bizarre, like, the insider trading. The insider trading is fucking bananas. We let those people, these are the people that you're letting dictate what can and cannot be said online?

• 3:58:52Speaker 02

  Said online.

• 3:58:52Joe Rogan?

  And you're trying to pretend that they don't have some sort of a financial interest, one way or the other? You, you gotta let people talk. It's the only way.

• 3:58:59Speaker 02

  Andrew Dictate. Should be in favor of that.

• 3:59:01Joe Rogan?

  Everyone.

• 3:59:01Speaker 02

  Do whatever you want to do.

• 3:59:03Joe Rogan?

  Whatever you want to do.

• 3:59:03Speaker 02

  Express whatever you want to express.

• 3:59:04Joe Rogan?

  If you want to make rap music, whatever you want to make, you need that. That's everything for us, for all of us.

• 3:59:10Speaker 03

  That's a great thing about rappers. They don't really attack each other for being inappropriate.

• 3:59:14Joe Rogan?

  They're terrified that if they go after rappers, they'll lose the entire segment of the population that likes rap music.

• 3:59:21Speaker 03

  Oh, interesting.

• 3:59:22Joe Rogan?

  Because everybody's sort of accepted that they like, if you listen to like, old school cooji rap or something like that, gangster music, you're accepting the fact this is entertainment, just like a fucking Al Capone movie. And it's fun to listen to. And if you start going after those people and you demand that kind of censorship, you're gonna lose not just the people in the black community, you're gonna lose the people in the white community that like rap, Chi- Asian community, Chinese, Japanese. Like, name it. Everybody likes rap music.

• 3:59:46Speaker 03

  Everybody likes rap.

• 3:59:47Joe Rogan?

  Leave us the fuck alone.

• 3:59:48Speaker 02

  Asian rappers.

• 3:59:49Joe Rogan?

  Leave it, leave us the fuck alone. And if you don't leave us the fuck alone, then you're gonna lose all the votes. So, I don't think they can go after rap music. I think they have to leave rap music alone.

• 3:59:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:59:58Speaker 02

  And it should be like, say what you wanna say.

• 4:00:00Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 4:00:01Speaker 02

  Especially in the arts, and that's okay. That's just your stance.

• 4:00:04Joe Rogan?

  It's okay. You, you should be allowed to have all kinds of shit. Do you remember when Sister Soulja had that rant?

• 4:00:10Speaker 03

  Oh, yes.

• 4:00:11Joe Rogan?

  And Bill Clinton had this rebuttal to it on TV that probably won him the election.

• 4:00:15Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 4:00:16Speaker 02

  What was that?

• 4:00:17Speaker 03

  She went after Whitey.

• 4:00:18Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, she, she was talking about like, here, we'll play it. We'll play it, 'cause I don't wanna paraphrase it. 'Cause we, we played it really recently. It's impo- it's like, shows you how good Clinton was when he was in his prime.

• 4:00:28Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah. Well, the Dems lost for years.

• 4:00:31Speaker 02

  He was fucking on fire.

• 4:00:33Joe Rogan?

  I think, I think it's like, him and Obama are the goats.

• 4:00:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 4:00:36Joe Rogan?

  It's like the John Jones and the fucking George St. Pierre of politics.

• 4:00:41Speaker 06

  Let's stand up for what's always been best about the Rainbow Coalition, which is people coming together across racial lines.

• 4:00:48Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 4:00:49Speaker 03

  The Rainbow Coalition was Jesse Jackson.

• 4:00:51Speaker 06

  Louisiana that you had here last night, a great role model. We don't have a lot of time to do this. We don't have a lot of time.

• 4:01:01Speaker 03

  Great hairline.

• 4:01:02Joe Rogan?

  Goddamn.

• 4:01:03Speaker 06

  You had a, a rap singer here last night.

• 4:01:06Speaker 02

  Who?

• 4:01:06Speaker 06

  Named Sister Soulja.

• 4:01:08Speaker 03

  Mmm.

• 4:01:08Speaker 06

  I defend her right to express herself through music, but her comments before and after Los Angeles were filled with the kind of hatred that you do not honor today and tonight. Just listen to this, what she said.

• 4:01:23Speaker 02

  Wet ass pussy.

• 4:01:25Speaker 06

  She told the Washington Post about a month ago, and I quote, "If black people kill black people every day, why not have a week and kill white people? So, you're a gang member and you'd normally kill somebody? Why not kill a white person? Last year, she said, 'You can't call me or any black person anywhere in the world a racist. We don't have the power to do to white people what white people have done to us, and even if we did, we don't have that low-down, dirty nature. If there are any good white people, I haven't met them. Where are they? Right here in this room?"

• 4:01:58Speaker 02

  Right here in this room, shut up, you rapist.

• 4:02:01Speaker 06

  I know she is a young person, but she has a big influence on a lot of people. And when people say that, if you took the words white and black and you reversed them, you might think David Duke was giving that speech.

• 4:02:13Speaker 03

  Ooh, it's a good point.

• 4:02:14Speaker 06

  Let me tell you, we all make mistakes and sometimes we're not as sensitive as we ought to be. And we have an obligation, all of us, to call attention to prejudice wherever we see it. A few months ago, I made a mistake.

• 4:02:27Speaker 03

  Fuck it, enter.

• 4:02:30Speaker 06

  Some chick said no and I said shut up. Didn't have any African-American members. I was criticized for doing it. You know what? I was rightly criticized for doing it. I made a mistake.

• 4:02:40Speaker 02

  Good for him.

• 4:02:41Speaker 06

  And I said I would never do that again. And I think all of us have got to be sensitive to that. We can't get anywhere in this country pointing the finger at one another across racial lines. If we do that, we're dead.

• 4:02:55Speaker 02

  Can't play that.

• 4:02:56Speaker 06

  And that will beat us. Even in Reverend Jackson's new math of this election, it's hard to get to a 34% solution or a 40% solution if the American people can be divided by race.

• 4:03:09Speaker 02

  Look at Jussie.

• 4:03:11Joe Rogan?

  Amazing. He was so good, Ben.

• 4:03:13Speaker 02

  To admit you're wrong, no one ever does it anymore.

• 4:03:15Joe Rogan?

  It's so smooth. The way he did it was so smooth. Jamie, we platter. Holla.

• 4:03:19Speaker 03

  Oh shit.

• 4:03:20Speaker 02

  Good speaker.

• 4:03:21Joe Rogan?

  Holla cost. One, one bong yet was enough for young Jamie.

• 4:03:25Speaker 02

  Let's get some steaks and go to Shane's house and grill them.

• 4:03:28Speaker 04

  I'm actually totally all right with that.

• 4:03:30Speaker 03

  What about your roommate?

• 4:03:31Speaker 04

  Ja- La Mer?

• 4:03:33Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 4:03:34Speaker 02

  La Mer's cool. He'll grill for us.

• 4:03:36Speaker 04

  La Mer will be there.

• 4:03:37Speaker 02

  Put on the bowtie and do it.

• 4:03:38Joe Rogan?

  I don't want to put him out. He's gonna fuck it up. I'm gonna have to be the griller.

• 4:03:41Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 4:03:42Speaker 02

  Yeah, you'll grill it.

• 4:03:43Speaker 04

  Actually, let's go do that.

• 4:03:44Speaker 02

  Let's do that. I'm in.

• 4:03:46Speaker 04

  I gotta pull, I turned the hot tub on before I left.

• 4:03:48Speaker 02

  Dude.

• 4:03:49Joe Rogan?

  Okay. Anything else? Should we cover anything else before we wrap this bitch up? Should we wait for JMo? We have to wait for JMo.

• 4:03:54Speaker 02

  We have to wait for JMo.

• 4:03:55Joe Rogan?

  Otherwise it won't shut off.

• 4:03:56Speaker 03

  We got Ellen leaving.

• 4:03:57Joe Rogan?

  Say something ridiculous. I'm like, oh no.

• 4:04:00Speaker 03

  Yeah, we talked politics. We talked the Jake Paul fight. That was so bad. That was a real waste of time.

• 4:04:06Joe Rogan?

  That seemed like a sparring match.

• 4:04:08Speaker 03

  The Jussie Smollett fight was better.

• 4:04:10Joe Rogan?

  Ah, I would like to see video of that.

• 4:04:13Speaker 03

  He got off, by the way.

• 4:04:14Joe Rogan?

  I know.

• 4:04:15Speaker 02

  Jussie Smollett?

• 4:04:16Speaker 04

  I knew he was innocent the whole time.

• 4:04:20Joe Rogan?

  How did they get him off? What was the, find out how Jesse Smollett got off, Jamie.

• 4:04:25Speaker 02

  What would you want, the four years now, what would you want one thing to be done?

• 4:04:29Joe Rogan?

  Over four years?

• 4:04:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:04:30Joe Rogan?

  Release the JFK files.

• 4:04:33Speaker 02

  That's one, that's one.

• 4:04:34Joe Rogan?

  Stop the war, well, stop the wars first.

• 4:04:36Speaker 02

  Stop the wars. Ukraine, Gaza, stop them.

• 4:04:38Joe Rogan?

  Stop the wars first.

• 4:04:38Speaker 02

  Mark?

• 4:04:39Speaker 03

  Uh, well, I like the censorship thing.

• 4:04:41Speaker 02

  I like the censorship thing.

• 4:04:42Joe Rogan?

  Why do I have to have one?

• 4:04:43Speaker 02

  I don't know, you're sure, you're right, you're right.

• 4:04:45Speaker 04

  Wars, wars is number one.

• 4:04:46Joe Rogan?

  Wars is always gonna be number one.

• 4:04:48Speaker 02

  I'd like to end the Cuba embargo, doesn't seem like they'll be doing anything.

• 4:04:52Joe Rogan?

  Instead, absolutely. Instead, the conviction was overturned because the Illinois Supreme Court ruled five to zero that a special prosecutor should not have been allowed to intervene after the Cook County's, uh, county state's attorneys initially dropped the charges against Smollett in exchange for forfeiting his $10,000 bond and conducting community service.

• 4:05:12Speaker 03

  Ah.

• 4:05:12Joe Rogan?

  So they shouldn't, that was, should have been punishment enough. And so they decided to make it public, make a big deal out of it.

• 4:05:18Speaker 03

  Alright.

• 4:05:18Joe Rogan?

  That's reasonable. Cause otherwise, was he going to jail? Did he have to go to jail?

• 4:05:23Speaker 02

  Ms. Pat, Ms. Pat was the best before anyone said it was fake. Before anyone.

• 4:05:27Joe Rogan?

  Oh yeah, she called it.

• 4:05:28Speaker 04

  I will say, I was day one.

• 4:05:30Speaker 02

  She goes, she goes, motherfucker. Who's gonna wear, who's gonna use name brand bleach to attack somebody?

• 4:05:35Speaker 03

  Ah.

• 4:05:36Speaker 02

  She goes, hey, hey, hey, right.

• 4:05:38Speaker 03

  That's funny.

• 4:05:38Joe Rogan?

  Here it is. Who's face a maximum of 15 years in prison? Oh my god, that's so crazy.

• 4:05:44Speaker 02

  He diverted funds. And made everyone think there's racism when there's none.

• 4:05:48Joe Rogan?

  He's an actor, it's like a baby that like bit an electric cord.

• 4:05:51Speaker 02

  Yeah. Bridgette said the best, Bridgette Fossey said the best. You can't let the actors write the fucking script.

• 4:05:56Speaker 03

  Well, actors write everything now.

• 4:05:58Joe Rogan?

  Well, that's like the Johnny Depp trial too. It's like, there's, there's certain times where the actors get involved in their own script writing, it can get pretty nutty.

• 4:06:06Speaker 02

  Johnny Depp during that interview was so funny, cause when they're like, what's his box for? There's a coke? He goes, yeah.

• 4:06:12Joe Rogan?

  Fuck do you think's in there?

• 4:06:15Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 4:06:18Speaker 03

  Isn't it crazy she put on makeup and said he beat her? Like, she just completely lied.

• 4:06:22Joe Rogan?

  Well, some people do that.

• 4:06:23Speaker 02

  And then the people are like, wow, maybe she has a point.

• 4:06:26Joe Rogan?

  He was originally sentenced to 150 days in jail, 30 months probation, and ordered to pay a fine of $130,000. He only spent about one week in prison before being released.

• 4:06:35Speaker 02

  Cause he did what they wanted.

• 4:06:36Joe Rogan?

  God damn, they put him in jail for a week, though.

• 4:06:38Speaker 03

  Oh, they did?

• 4:06:39Joe Rogan?

  The whole thing's stupid as fuck, but it's just an attention grab. No one's a victim of it, other than everybody's sensibility. Like, there's no real victim of it. Like, if he victimized someone, I would see, I think, the public humiliation of people finding out that he... It's like, it's enough. We don't have to cage people for something stupid. It's a stupid thing, and it's also a stupid thing from an actor that's involved in this bizarre industry that props people up for no reason, then shoots them down. It's a fucking chaotic, bizarre way to live your life, and you're probably insane if you're involved in it.

• 4:07:10Speaker 03

  But it's a good sign for our country, that, like, hey, this thing actually didn't happen. He had to make this up.

• 4:07:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's great.

• 4:07:16Speaker 03

  This shit doesn't happen in the streets. It's a hoax.

• 4:07:18Joe Rogan?

  It's just like an actor writing, "This is MAGA country. Bitch, you're in Chicago."

• 4:07:22Speaker 02

  Yeah, what country?

• 4:07:23Joe Rogan?

  What the fuck are you talking about?

• 4:07:24Speaker 03

  Pouring bleach on...

• 4:07:25Speaker 02

  God, they wanted it so bad to be this thing.

• 4:07:27Joe Rogan?

  Here's my favorite part.

• 4:07:28Speaker 02

  Everyone's cool.

• 4:07:29Joe Rogan?

  My favorite part was when he walked in with the noose still around his neck. You have to leave the noose. You don't take the noose off, because then no one's gonna believe you.

• 4:07:37Speaker 03

  Right. Jesus Christ.

• 4:07:40Speaker 02

  It's like when I wear a fucking festival armband, six months later.

• 4:07:44Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my God.

• 4:07:45Speaker 02

  I'm cool.

• 4:07:46Joe Rogan?

  Did you ever go to South by Southwest? You're amazing. Did you see the new Robert Rodriguez movie? You're amazing.

• 4:07:54Speaker 03

  You still got your October 7th band?

• 4:07:58Speaker 03

  That was a festival.

• 4:07:59Joe Rogan?

  Bro, if Trump can just stop both of those fucking things from popping off...

• 4:08:03Speaker 02

  That would be great.

• 4:08:03Joe Rogan?

  It's worth everything else he tweets about. Yeah.

• 4:08:06Speaker 04

  That's the whole point.

• 4:08:07Speaker 02

  Get in there and stop this shit. Just cool everyone down.

• 4:08:11Joe Rogan?

  Just chill out, let's have a good time. We got a good, we got a good place here.

• 4:08:13Joe Rogan?

  I think his like feistiness kinda makes him his own worst enemy in a certain way, like in like why people hate him. When he tweets like, I hate Taylor Swift. Ah, yeah. It's like his feistiness, his fucking, but that's also what kept him in this thing. So if I think about it psychologically, like I think about certain competitors in sports or in fighting. There's people that are just like complete fucking maniacs, like Michael Jordan, and that's why they're the best.

• 4:08:40Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 4:08:40Joe Rogan?

  They're, they're complete maniacs and the complete maniacs are oftentimes like not so good at controlling their initial thought.

• 4:08:47Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 4:08:48Speaker 02

  Michael Jordan would bribe like baggage handlers to get his bag out first. Cause you bet with Scottie Pippen whose bag would come out first.

• 4:08:56Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god, that's amazing. That was amazing.

• 4:08:59Speaker 04

  I think Trump's ego is like actually maybe a good thing, cause if, cause he'll do to me what every, everybody says he is like. So we're sitting here being like, he's gonna be the one to end the wars. And I think he'll be like, yeah.

• 4:09:13Speaker 02

  I have to now.

• 4:09:13Speaker 04

  I am the one that's gonna end the wars.

• 4:09:15Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 4:09:15Speaker 04

  And I think he, I mean, that's how I kinda look at it. It's like, I think his ego is actually, I mean, it is a good thing because I think he will.

• 4:09:24Speaker 02

  Yeah, he's gotta be like, guys, you both done shit wrong. But can we stop this?

• 4:09:27Speaker 04

  He did not drain the swamp.

• 4:09:28Speaker 02

  He did not drain the swamp. That was sucky.

• 4:09:31Joe Rogan?

  But that's a good question that I had for him. Like, what was it like making like 10,000 appointments? And he's like, we made a lot of mistakes. He's like, we, I, I've never governed before. Like, it's essentially, and every time he's talked about this, he said like, you, you enter into this new thing.

• 4:09:45Speaker 04

  The Gates man, the Gates man was, Matt Gaetz is, get the fuck out of here.

• 4:09:50Joe Rogan?

  He's gone. Well, he had a, he had a back down, it seems like.

• 4:09:53Speaker 04

  I know, but it's like, bro, if I see, first off, is you a dude with insane plastic surgery on your face?

• 4:09:59Joe Rogan?

  He's got the botox.

• 4:10:00Speaker 04

  Get him out.

• 4:10:01Joe Rogan?

  The eyebrows. Well, I heard he was like.

• 4:10:04Speaker 04

  Obviously, don't kill Matt Gaetz.

• 4:10:05Joe Rogan?

  No, but he's like, I know what you're saying.

• 4:10:07Speaker 02

  I heard he was like, Matt Gaetz, you gotta resign so I can appoint you to this thing. And then he resigned, he's like, fuck off, loser.

• 4:10:12Joe Rogan?

  Is that what he did? Did you make that up?

• 4:10:14Speaker 02

  No, somebody told me. I didn't just. He told Matt Gaetz, you gotta resign so I can appoint you. And Matt Gaetz is like, why do I have to resign? He goes, trust me, trust me. You resign, I appoint you to this thing.

• 4:10:23Speaker 04

  Oh.

• 4:10:24Speaker 02

  And he goes, okay, I resign. He goes, not appointing you.

• 4:10:27Speaker 04

  No, I think, I think with Matt Gaetz.

• 4:10:28Joe Rogan?

  Where'd you hear this?

• 4:10:29Speaker 02

  Yesterday.

• 4:10:30Joe Rogan?

  Where?

• 4:10:31Speaker 02

  Somewhere at the comedy mothership. At the tunnels.

• 4:10:34Speaker 03

  At the temple.

• 4:10:34Speaker 02

  Somebody told me that. I don't even know who that guy is.

• 4:10:37Joe Rogan?

  You are spreading misinformation. This is why they wanna censor internet.

• 4:10:40Speaker 04

  No, I think it was, I think it was.

• 4:10:41Joe Rogan?

  All right, you're fucking up my whole show.

• 4:10:42Speaker 02

  So is he not a congressman anymore?

• 4:10:44Joe Rogan?

  RFK Junior, that's what a guy's supposed to look like when he's, he's, his age.

• 4:10:48Speaker 03

  That leathery mug.

• 4:10:49Joe Rogan?

  Healthy guy, ripped, strong.

• 4:10:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:10:52Joe Rogan?

  Seventy years old. Yay. That's it. No fucking botox.

• 4:10:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 4:10:57Joe Rogan?

  You know, botulism shot in your fucking face. What is that stuff? Is it botulism?

• 4:11:03Speaker 03

  Him and Cheryl, still fuck, you can tell.

• 4:11:05Speaker 02

  Who and who?

• 4:11:06Speaker 03

  Him and Cheryl.

• 4:11:06Speaker 04

  Oh, he definitely is.

• 4:11:07Speaker 02

  Oh, RFK.

• 4:11:08Speaker 03

  Cheryl Heine, you can tell there. Yeah, you can tell there, she's throwing her around.

• 4:11:12Joe Rogan?

  Do you think what he tells? Have some respect.

• 4:11:16Speaker 02

  I'm about.

• 4:11:17Joe Rogan?

  Have some respect.

• 4:11:18Speaker 02

  I'm about, I'm about, I'm about to slap her ass.

• 4:11:21Speaker 03

  Sounds like a car that can't start.

• 4:11:24Speaker 03

  That's an old Danica joke.

• 4:11:24Joe Rogan?

  It's gonna be interesting to see what happens if that guy gets into a position of influence and power.

• 4:11:28Speaker 04

  If he takes my Fruit Loops, I'm gonna fucking storm the Capitol.

• 4:11:31Joe Rogan?

  He's not gonna take your Fruit Loops.

• 4:11:32Speaker 03

  I know a lot of people are skipping my RFK, but we are obese, we are addicted to opioids, we are fucked up.

• 4:11:37Joe Rogan?

  That's true, but I have to tell you, I was looking at the images, the difference between the Canadian Fruit Loops and the American Fruit Loops online.

• 4:11:43Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:11:44Joe Rogan?

  And I'm willing to take the risk of the red dye.

• 4:11:47Speaker 03

  What do you mean?

• 4:11:48Joe Rogan?

  They look so much cooler. Look how much cooler they look.

• 4:11:50Speaker 02

  I'll tell you.

• 4:11:50Joe Rogan?

  Show me the difference, Jimmy.

• 4:11:52Speaker 03

  I ate a bowl today.

• 4:11:53Joe Rogan?

  If you just eat a little bit every now and then, how bad is that red dye?

• 4:11:55Speaker 04

  Give us some cove.

• 4:11:56Speaker 03

  I switched them a few years ago, no one bought them.

• 4:11:58Joe Rogan?

  I'm fine. I've eaten a thousand bowls of Fruit Loops.

• 4:12:02Speaker 04

  I'm not doing great.

• 4:12:03Speaker 03

  Same.

• 4:12:04Joe Rogan?

  Let's take a look at what the Fruit Loops look like in Canada versus, like, look at that. I want the one on the left.

• 4:12:08Speaker 03

  Oh, those are gross and gay.

• 4:12:11Joe Rogan?

  I don't wanna eat it every day, but I want the one on the left.

• 4:12:14Speaker 03

  There's a push a few years ago to take them out and they did, but no one bought it, so they put it back in.

• 4:12:18Joe Rogan?

  The one on the right looks like that generic stuff that you buy when you're poor.

• 4:12:21Speaker 03

  The bag.

• 4:12:22Joe Rogan?

  You know, when it's like, uh, fruit cereal.

• 4:12:24Speaker 03

  Right, right, right.

• 4:12:26Speaker 04

  You're some healthy, poor fucking bitch.

• 4:12:29Joe Rogan?

  That's like generic cereal.

• 4:12:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, it looks like it's got AIDS.

• 4:12:32Joe Rogan?

  That's why Canadians are sad. They have bad Fruit Loops.

• 4:12:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:12:35Joe Rogan?

  Just don't eat it every day, you fucking idiots. Don't eat it all the time. Don't feed it to your cats.

• 4:12:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:12:40Joe Rogan?

  Don't be constantly.

• 4:12:41Speaker 02

  Play me a sad Saskatoon.

• 4:12:42Joe Rogan?

  That's not nutrition. That's nonsense that you'd eat occasionally. Occasional nonsense is good for you.

• 4:12:47Speaker 04

  It's crazy. They tried to nail him on the Fruit Loops and he's exactly right.

• 4:12:51Speaker 03

  I know, I know.

• 4:12:52Speaker 04

  They like Fruit Loops.

• 4:12:53Joe Rogan?

  The New York Times fact-checked him.

• 4:12:55Speaker 04

  It's one of you fucking dumbasses eating Fruit Loops. And get, you know what I mean?

• 4:12:59Speaker 02

  They should do better with the FDA.

• 4:13:00Speaker 04

  Don't eat fucking Fruit Loops.

• 4:13:01Speaker 03

  Right.

• 4:13:02Speaker 04

  If we have a health director that's like, "Yeah, crush Fruit Loops."

• 4:13:04Speaker 03

  But we've been pushing balanced breakfast for thirty years with the cereal.

• 4:13:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's crazy. It's part of this balanced breakfast.

• 4:13:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 4:13:11Joe Rogan?

  LOL.

• 4:13:12Speaker 02

  Yeah. Fruit Loops is cardboard.

• 4:13:15Joe Rogan?

  Fucking eggs. What are you doing to that kid?

• 4:13:17Speaker 03

  Yeah, autism's up, depression's up, all that shit's up.

• 4:13:20Joe Rogan?

  It's, this is, there's too much money. There's too much money that's being funneled to people. That's really all it is. The pharmaceutical drug companies make so much money. They have so much power.

• 4:13:29Speaker 03

  But I thought we cared about people's health.

• 4:13:31Joe Rogan?

  But you're supposed to. They're supposed to too. It's not supposed to be you shouldn't make any money. It's like you shouldn't make as much money as you possibly can while lying.

• 4:13:38Speaker 02

  Should do it at the, at the, at the risk of everyone.

• 4:13:40Speaker 03

  But that's a liberal, that's a liberal thought.

• 4:13:43Joe Rogan?

  It is. Everybody still needs pharmaceutical drugs. Like, they've come up with some amazing drugs that have kept people alive. But you can't let them just make as much money as they possibly can while lying. That's the problem. It's like, you have to know, like, how much of this stuff is safe? And how much of this stuff is untested? And what, what are the tests? And are you being honest? Or are you just like making these tests work for you? Are you bullshitting? So if you're bullshitting, then you're trying to make more money than you should. You should still be able to make a fuckload of money. Cause there's a ton of pharmaceutical drugs that are awesome that people need. But you can't make as much money as possible while lying. And that's the, that's the thing. It's not like it's an anti-pharmaceutical drug. It's an anti-human perspective to not look at it this way.

• 4:14:26Joe Rogan?

  It's to say you're gonna allow these people that are only motivated by money to just wreck havoc on people's health for profit. And either you, you're cool with that, or you're not cool with that. And if you're cool with that and you call yourself a progressive, that's kind of crazy. It's kind of crazy that you want an unregulated corporation that has a, a literal obligation to their shareholders to make the most profit possible. And then you get these fucking corporate assassins to run these things. And then you have insane amounts of money that you're spending on the media. There's no way anybody gets a fair shake at what the fuck is actually going on.

• 4:15:01Speaker 02

  Advil's okay, Purdue's not.

• 4:15:02Joe Rogan?

  There's even, you know, a lot of those things are not good for you, man, that people take on a regular basis. And you don't know it because it's being hidden from you.

• 4:15:10Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:15:10Speaker 03

  Follow your nose.

• 4:15:11Joe Rogan?

  You know, I read this story about this lady who had COVID and she was really hurting. So she took too much Tylenol. She died from liver failure.

• 4:15:18Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 4:15:19Joe Rogan?

  Cause if you take too much Tylenol, it'll fucking kill you.

• 4:15:22Speaker 03

  Really?

• 4:15:23Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 4:15:24Speaker 03

  I didn't know that.

• 4:15:24Speaker 04

  It's gonna be the last headache you ever have.

• 4:15:26Joe Rogan?

  If you just go ham and think the more Tylenol, the better, you just start chewing on them. You will have a fucking real problem.

• 4:15:33Speaker 03

  Oh, I took like five today.

• 4:15:34Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 4:15:35Speaker 04

  Let's go.

• 4:15:35Speaker 02

  One day.

• 4:15:36Speaker 03

  Really?

• 4:15:36Joe Rogan?

  Everyone should know that. You should fucking know that.

• 4:15:39Speaker 03

  I didn't know that.

• 4:15:40Joe Rogan?

  It's not that you shouldn't be able to get Tylenol. Of course you should have Tylenol. Everybody likes Tylenol. You get a headache, take Tylenol, you feel better. But it's like you, you, everyone should fucking know, like what is like really dangerous for you.

• 4:15:51Speaker 02

  True.

• 4:15:52Joe Rogan?

  And what studies have you done and how honest are you being? And are you just trying to make more money?

• 4:15:56Speaker 03

  Yeah. In the nineties, they took all the Tylenol off the shelf. Remember that?

• 4:15:59Joe Rogan?

  What is this, Jamie?

• 4:16:00Speaker 03

  I just took the liver and COVID and just see animals from that.

• 4:16:03Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no, this was about Tylenol. She died of Tylenol failure.

• 4:16:06Speaker 02

  Who are these on Tylenol? What a fucking dork.

• 4:16:08Speaker 03

  It says COVID's hard on your liver, so.

• 4:16:10Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, I'm sure.

• 4:16:11Speaker 03

  Heads up already.

• 4:16:11Speaker 02

  COVID's hard on everything.

• 4:16:12Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but, but, but the thing is like people have died from Tylenol without COVID.

• 4:16:16Speaker 02

  COVID does suck.

• 4:16:17Joe Rogan?

  Tylenol, acetaminophen, Google how many deaths of acetaminophen every year? Cause that's an interesting statistic.

• 4:16:23Speaker 02

  That's interesting.

• 4:16:24Joe Rogan?

  Google that every year.

• 4:16:25Speaker 04

  Yeah, good for you. That's gonna be a tough spell.

• 4:16:27Joe Rogan?

  Deaths. Per year.

• 4:16:29Speaker 02

  You got it. That's an auto fail. That's an auto fail for sure.

• 4:16:32Speaker 03

  It's about speed.

• 4:16:34Joe Rogan?

  Uh, look at that.

• 4:16:35Speaker 02

  Four hundred and fifty-eight. Eh, it's not that much.

• 4:16:37Joe Rogan?

  Four hundred and fifty-eight deaths every year due to acute liver failure. But that's four hundred and fifty-eight people that didn't have to die.

• 4:16:44Speaker 03

  Yeah. Yeah, Gaza.

• 4:16:45Joe Rogan?

  Well. Yeah. I mean, but still, like if you die from that. But that's fucking crazy. And look at all the hospital visits. Look at all the people that like had to be hospitalized. Go back to that, please.

• 4:16:59Joe Rogan?

  Look at this, 2,600 hospitalizations, 56,000 emergency room visits. So it's not just the 458 people that died, it's 56,000 people that probably got on death's door. It was the point where they had to go to the fucking emergency room. They didn't cause a poison control centers. Yeah, it's, it's real.

• 4:17:18Speaker 03

  A lot of people like going to the emergency room too.

• 4:17:19Joe Rogan?

  That's true. That is true.

• 4:17:21Speaker 02

  I gotta do something.

• 4:17:22Joe Rogan?

  That's true.

• 4:17:23Speaker 02

  I mean, look up how many, how many weed emergency rooms there are where people go, I ate all the popcorn.

• 4:17:28Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god, I had a friend of mine and I think it was like, his sister's husband was a, a complete hypochondriac, like a full on, like he would go to, he'd go to the hospital, like emergency room, like all the time. All the time. And she was going crazy, like she didn't know what to do about it. He was like completely nuts, like he would just get checked into the hospital and there was nothing wrong with him. And then he would just decide that there was something wrong with him, he had to go right now and he'd go and there was nothing wrong with him. And it was like a regular thing. Jesus Christ. Yeah.

• 4:17:58Speaker 02

  But that's a stat, that's in the stats.

• 4:18:00Joe Rogan?

  And he was like, her husband, and they had children together, and you got this guy. Stop going to the doctor, you weirdo. Who just can't stop going to the doctor, like he was like really kooky. It became like a real phobia, like a real, like a real mental, you know, pathology. I don't know, the doctor sucks. Brother, this guy was constantly thinking something was going wrong, so he was just like in this constant state of anxiety about his health.

• 4:18:23Speaker 03

  Yikes.

• 4:18:24Joe Rogan?

  It's a real thing that happens to people.

• 4:18:25Speaker 02

  Don Barris got high with popcorn weed, like, I don't know, and then ate the rest of the bag, and then went to sleep and woke up and was like, what the, something's wrong with me. Went to the hospital and the doctor tested him and he goes, smoke weed? And Don's like, no, fuck.

• 4:18:38Joe Rogan?

  And he realized that's what was wrong with him.

• 4:18:41Speaker 02

  He goes, god damn it.

• 4:18:42Joe Rogan?

  He went too hard.

• 4:18:42Speaker 02

  He thought he was having a panic attack.

• 4:18:44Joe Rogan?

  He went too hard.

• 4:18:45Speaker 03

  Oh, I never go to the hospital. I gotta be shit and blood or puking.

• 4:18:49Joe Rogan?

  I've gotta literally be dying. I've told this story a bunch of times about Ari. Me and Ari were playing pool once and Ari was limping. I go, why are you limping? And he goes, oh, spider bit me. I go, let me see it. He pulls up his knee. I go, oh my god, dude, you have a staph infection. I go, we gotta go to the hospital right now.

• 4:19:03Speaker 02

  Right, he was like, we gotta go right now.

• 4:19:05Joe Rogan?

  I unscrewed my queue right now. I go, we gotta go to the hospital right now. You gotta. Get to emergency room.

• 4:19:09Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 4:19:10Joe Rogan?

  Hit a raging staph infection.

• 4:19:13Speaker 04

  My dad, my dad went to hospital for his heart attack. He was like, I'm tired. I'm going upstairs. And then he was laying in bed. He started Googling. He was like, hey Siri, what are heart attack symptoms?

• 4:19:24Joe Rogan?

  The things about jujitsu gyms is they don't fucking tell you the dangers of staph infections.

• 4:19:28Speaker 02

  They should have pictures of what staph looks like.

• 4:19:30Joe Rogan?

  One hundred percent.

• 4:19:31Speaker 03

  What is a staph?

• 4:19:32Joe Rogan?

  A staph infection is if you don't wash yourself, and Ari's a dirty bitch, we all know it.

• 4:19:36Speaker 02

  Listen, I can't argue with that.

• 4:19:38Joe Rogan?

  Then you're

• 4:19:38Speaker 02

  The stats won't show it.

• 4:19:39Joe Rogan?

  Getting scratched. You're scraping your knee on the ground.

• 4:19:43Speaker 02

  The mat.

• 4:19:44Joe Rogan?

  Nails.

• 4:19:45Speaker 03

  Slow jobs.

• 4:19:45Joe Rogan?

  Dude's fingernails scratch you.

• 4:19:47Speaker 02

  That's about right. That's about right.

• 4:19:48Joe Rogan?

  You get it. If you don't wash your, like, I'm diligent. If I do jujitsu, I wa, I use defense soap.

• 4:19:55Speaker 02

  I would wash my hands and go do spots.

• 4:19:58Joe Rogan?

  I wash my whole, I lather up my whole body. I let it sit on me for like a couple of minutes and then I rinse it off.

• 4:20:03Speaker 03

  Yeah, you're like herpes.

• 4:20:04Joe Rogan?

  Yep. And if I have scratches, if I have any kind of scratches, I have wipes and I wipe the scratches.

• 4:20:10Speaker 02

  Really?

• 4:20:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. I've got staph twice.

• 4:20:12Speaker 02

  They should do a better job of that in jits.

• 4:20:14Joe Rogan?

  Tate Fletcher told me I had staph the first time. It's one of the reasons why I was happy I could tell you. Cause I was sitting, me and him were at the airport. We were chilling. I was wearing shorts and I had my, my, my foot up on my knee like that. And he goes, what's going on in your calf? And I go, what is that? He goes, what is that? And I go, I don't know. It was like a couple of red dots. So I go, it's nothing. He goes, dude, that might be staph infection. Whoa. Seriously?

• 4:20:34Speaker 02

  That's how guys are.

• 4:20:35Joe Rogan?

  It looks like that?

• 4:20:36Speaker 02

  That's how guys are. Should be fun.

• 4:20:37Joe Rogan?

  So I immediately went to the doctor. He's like, that's staph.

• 4:20:39Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 4:20:40Joe Rogan?

  They tested it. They gave me antibiotics and I was like, whoa.

• 4:20:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, I was like, I said, I'll go to the doctor tomorrow. And Joe's like, dude, I'm telling you, I understand. You gotta go now. It's about to become systemic.

• 4:20:51Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 4:20:51Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:20:51Joe Rogan?

  You gotta catch it quick. One of Brian Callen's friends' wives died from staph.

• 4:20:55Speaker 03

  What?

• 4:20:56Joe Rogan?

  Cause she tried to treat it. She tried to be like holistic and take vitamins and shit. Like you gotta go to the fucking doctor. See, this is the thing. We're talking about pharmaceutical drugs.

• 4:21:04Speaker 02

  That's my favorite anti-vaxxers is where the crystal people and the super rednecks come together.

• 4:21:08Joe Rogan?

  This is why we need balance, right? Because with pharmaceutical drugs, like antibiotics are fucking super important. They're super important. And it saved your life for sure. Your knee was fucked. It was like a zit under a microscope.

• 4:21:21Speaker 02

  It's a problem.

• 4:21:21Joe Rogan?

  It was like, you ever look at it, if you looked at a zit under a microscope, that's what it was like. I was like, this is huge.

• 4:21:26Speaker 02

  Why are you limping?

• 4:21:27Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he was limping from a zit. It was that bad.

• 4:21:31Speaker 03

  You didn't know, you didn't know.

• 4:21:31Speaker 02

  Guys just assume like, I think I'm okay, this should go away.

• 4:21:34Joe Rogan?

  It was Hollywood billiards.

• 4:21:35Speaker 02

  Guys don't go to doctors.

• 4:21:36Joe Rogan?

  He was hobbling around the table. I was like, what is going on, man?

• 4:21:39Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 4:21:40Joe Rogan?

  If I didn't look at your knee, dude, and you just left that go, you would be a dead man.

• 4:21:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, you're like Joe, like, pull your, pull your pet leg up.

• 4:21:47Speaker 04

  Such a good podcast.

• 4:21:51Speaker 04

  We were just one.

• 4:21:52Joe Rogan?

  I'll never forget that thing. My heart stopped. My heart stopped when I saw it.

• 4:21:57Speaker 02

  Hello, doggy.

• 4:21:58Speaker 03

  Damn.

• 4:21:59Joe Rogan?

  The moment I saw that giant zit, I'm like, literally, my, my breath stopped. I'm like, oh my God, we're gonna get to your hospital right now.

• 4:22:05Speaker 02

  That was the same pool sessions. I've got, Joe goes to the bathroom. This is before any of the podcast even. And, uh, he goes about this guy clocks him. And he comes back and he goes to Joe, there, he goes, what do you think of that big fight? And Joe's like, oh, which one? And he goes, I don't know.

• 4:22:23Speaker 03

  He just started talking.

• 4:22:25Joe Rogan?

  He was just, I gotta pee again. Let's wrap this, let's wrap this up. Gentlemen, we saved the world.

• 4:22:29Speaker 04

  JMo, Notre Dame football.

• 4:22:31Joe Rogan?

  One more time. What's the score?

• 4:22:33Speaker 03

  Comedy.

• 4:22:34Speaker 04

  Fourteen dollars.

• 4:22:35Joe Rogan?

  MarkNorman.com.

• 4:22:37Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 4:22:37Joe Rogan?

  marknormandcomedy.com. Uh, make sure you watch Tyre, season two being filmed right now.

• 4:22:42Speaker 02

  When is it coming out?

• 4:22:43Speaker 04

  Spring or summer.

• 4:22:44Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 4:22:44Joe Rogan?

  Let's go. Let's fucking go. Ari Shaffir.

• 4:22:46Speaker 02

  New special coming out, January fourteenth, the week, six days before inauguration.

• 4:22:51Joe Rogan?

  Let's fucking go.

• 4:22:52Speaker 03

  Oh, I'm at the Ryman in, in Nashville.

• 4:22:54Joe Rogan?

  Beautiful. Ari, uh, let's get you on the books like right before the special.

• 4:22:58Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 4:22:59Speaker 04

  Maybe Mar-a-Lago. We'll see.

• 4:23:00Speaker 02

  Mar-a-Lago.

• 4:23:01Joe Rogan?

  I should do that after he gets in. That's January twentieth. We do Protect Our Parks. I'm gonna get him on the books and then we'll do a Protect Our Parks in Mar-a-Lago.

• 4:23:08Speaker 03

  We needed this one. I missed you guys.

• 4:23:10Joe Rogan?

  America needed it. Let's go.

• 4:23:12Speaker 02

  Let's all play golf.

• 4:23:13Joe Rogan?

  Let's go. Let's go.

• 4:23:14Speaker 03

  Sex with kids.

• 4:23:16Speaker 02

  Let's go to Shane's.

• 4:23:16Joe Rogan?

  Hey, you just fucked it all up. No, sorry. Cut that, cut that part.

• 4:23:20Speaker 02

  Dude, I love you guys so much. This is funny shit.