TURN STRESS INTO PEACE & PURPOSE

Navigate Through Stress and Overwhelm with the #1 and #2 Mindset and peak performance coaches IN THE WORLD! In this NEW EPISODE, we're tackling a topic that's become a modern-day epidemic – STRESS. With the incredible Brendon Burchard by my side, we're here to guide you through the turbulence of life with actionable strategies for overcoming stress. This conversation, recorded live in front of an audience at a recent GROWTH DAY event, and I pray it brings you HOPE and HEALING. Brendon and I dive deep into personal practices and universal principles that have helped us navigate through life's storms including: How Faith and Prayer can provide unparalleled comfort and clarity, helping to distinguish between what's within our control and what we need to surrender. Strategies to fight back against discouragement, doubt, and delusions that often accompany stressful periods. Sharing simple, effective methods to physiologically combat stress. Strategies to foster a more peaceful and resilient mindset. The Law of Emotional Attraction and how to pivot towards positivity. Practical advice on dealing with negative people who may contribute to your stress levels. How to break your Addiction to Outcomes and learn to appreciate the journey. The Critical Role of Sleep Remind yourself of your inherent worth and the qualities that define who you are beyond your stressors. Stress doesn't just challenge us; it has the potential to change us – for better or worse. But with the right tools and mindset, we can emerge stronger, more peaceful, and with a deeper understanding of ourselves and our place in the world. This episode isn't just about coping with stress; it's about transforming it into a force for growth and peace. Brendon and I share these insights not just from a place of professional expertise but from personal experience and a deep desire to help others find the comfort and resilience we've worked to cultivate in our own lives. Join us on this healing journey as we arm you with the knowledge and practices to lessen the impact of stress and embrace a life filled with more peace and purpose. Let's find that calm in the chaos together. 🌟 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Ed Mylett?

  So hey guys, are you frustrated with where you're at right now? Maybe stunted in your progress? Well, if you are, I want to recommend a place for you to go called Growth Day. GrowthDay.com/Ed. It is the number one personal development app on the planet. It's got all kinds of high-performance techniques in there. Courses, accountability, journaling, live speeches from some of the top influencers in the world, including me. It's an overall environment to change your life. GrowthDay.com/Ed. I hear so many small business owners say the exact same thing. They just never have enough time in the day. Well, I measure time differently. I've compressed, condensed, heck, I've bent time. My first day is 6:00 a.m. to noon. My second day starts at noon and goes till 6:00 p.m.

• 0:43Ed Mylett?

  And my third day, 6:00 p.m. to midnight. I now get 21 days a week. Stack that up over a month, over a year, over five years, and my life's completely different than it would have been otherwise. And if you want to win as an entrepreneur, you have to compress your time too. And you definitely can't afford to waste it waiting weeks on a big bank for capital. Your best bet's to work with my friends at Cardiff. They know how to compress time for entrepreneurs. They get your business approved in minutes and funded the very same day. They're America's favorite small business lender, and for good reason. Over 20 years in business, over $12 billion deployed to small business across America. Stop letting bank delays slow down your momentum. Head to cardiff.co/Ed. That's cardiff.co/Ed. Cardiff.co. Real growth, fast funding.

• 1:28Ed Mylett?

  Cardiff. Borrow better.

• 1:35Speaker 01

  This is the Enmirage Show.

• 1:38Brendon Burchard?

  Okay, stress and overwhelm today. Well, first, we talked about, I was talking with my group earlier about the fortress and building up good relationships and habits that give you the strength to endure the weather when it hits.

• 1:53Ed Mylett?

  No doubt.

• 1:54Brendon Burchard?

  What do you do for that? Like, what are your habits that you think like, you know, by doing this, I'm in a stronger place when the storms hit?

• 2:00Ed Mylett?

  So the first thing for sure for me is prayer. So by a mile, I almost got, almost got a little, that was weird, that tugged on me. But, um, so my first fortress for me is Jesus is God. So for me, that's your, but whatever, but whatever, whatever your, your faith is, I mean, that's great. But for me, I rely very heavily, um, on prayer. I prayed right, as you know, right before we came out. Um, but for me, that's where I get my strength and my comfort from. Um, it may sound really cheesy to you, but it's an amazing, as I've gotten older and older and grown in my faith, it's become the ultimate fortress for me because I've literally, this may sound hokey, but like that old phrase of Jesus, take the wheel. There's just, I, I literally just, I give

• 2:43Ed Mylett?

  it, I pray on my knees every night. And what I try to get is, what I ask the Lord for is not to make everything around me easier, but to make me better. Um, because I, I think these times were part of his plan anyways. And so knowing that, it feels like it's part of my destiny as I'm going through a stressful time. So I have some peace about it just in and of itself, but I do ask for more strength. The other thing I ask for is discernment. And the biggest part of discernment that I'm looking for, for the Lord to give me, is the discernment to know which things I can control and impact and which ones I can't. And then to have that wisdom, like my dad was in a 12 step program and they say this often, but like the wisdom to know in this moment, what are the things I can control? And what are the things I need to give to you, Lord, that you can control? And I'll

• 3:25Ed Mylett?

  do my part and you do your part. It's almost like a partnership. And so for me, that somehow when I do that, I just sort of get this sense that everything will be okay. Yeah. Everything will be okay. The other thing about, comes with prayer is perspective. I'm gonna die someday anyway. I mean, I mean, that sounds harsh, but like this is going to end at some point. This body, all these things I'm carrying, all these other things. And it just gives me perspective. And I've known I've been blessed all my life. When I've really needed it, God's shown up in my life. And so it just reminds me of, I'm never alone. Because a lot of times when I go through stress, I don't know, maybe you have a little bit of this, but I, I begin to, and this is why the fortress thing you said was so brilliant. You're back there talking up here and I'm like jumping up and down, asking everybody, like, I was gonna say that, dang it.

• 4:10Ed Mylett?

  Because it's so good, but one of the things that comes with that fortress, and you're part of my fortress, you know that. And there's a very, very small circle of people. But the other thing that happens for me is I begin to feel alone when I have a major stress in my life. I feel isolated. I have a tendency to get smaller, like the tip you gave earlier about standing up. I try to just not feel so small and alone in those moments. And so it reminds me that God's always with me. And whatever your faith is, you believe that. And my faith as a Christian, I believe that very strongly. And so I can kind of go back through times in my life and I'll reflect on those things. And so for me, that's the number one fortress for me, aside from the group, which we can talk about in a minute. And then that discernment piece is huge, just to know what can I control right now? And it kind of shrinks the problem down to some extent too, right?

• 4:54Ed Mylett?

  These are things I can't control. These are the things that I can move. And then I really focus in on, you know, as much as I can, almost, it sounds weird, the word overwhelm. But my personality type is I'm almost going to overwhelm the things I can do. So all this thing may be overwhelming. Yeah, I'm a force too, and God's a force. I keep repeating to myself a phrase all the time. I'm built for this, I'm built for this, I'm built for this, I am built for this, I am built for this. And I say that over and over and over again, and it gives me this, I'm going to overwhelm this thing myself. So, and so then the other thing I do is I think to myself, what are the things, if you believe in your faith? John Gordon's here today and he talks about these different D's.

• 5:35Ed Mylett?

  And, and I also ask myself, okay, if the adversary is attacking me right now, or this is just of some negative thing? You know, what are the things? And John has all these different D's, but for me, there's like really three D's that happened. One, I get discouraged when stress comes. So I want to, I want to, I want to be aware of what's happening to me when it's not working, discouragement. And then to some extent, in my case, I'll start to doubt if I'm going the wrong way. Doubt my ability to handle it, doubt that I can get through this, doubt that it's all going to get better, doubt that, you know, the right people will come into place here. I get a little doubt, and then I get a little bit delusional. And delusion is a major problem with stress because what you do is you begin to do something called thought stacking.

• 6:18Ed Mylett?

  And you start stacking the thought over and over and over, don't you? And you repeat it and you think in your mind, if I just think about this enough times, something's going to occur to me to cure it. Don't you? And you just start thought stacking and thought stacking and stacking and stacking, like you said a minute ago. And I gotta fix it now, now, now, now, now. And then you start running out every possible scenario of what could go wrong. And I used to think, man, if I could just think about everything could go wrong, then I can prevent all those things from going wrong. So I'm just gonna keep thinking about this thing until I figure it out. Right? But the fact of the matter is, usually the first time I thought about it, my best thought was there, and then I need some perspective. So I do this, I get delusional. And delusion makes you think it's bigger than it is.

• 6:59Ed Mylett?

  And worse than it is, and I can never come back from this. And you delude yourself into believing that you don't have any control over the right things. And so those three Ds in my case really impact me, so I'm aware of them when I do them. And they lose their power over me instantly. And I'll show you in a minute, kind of some of the things I do on the front end. I think what would be good for me to do for you today is to teach you some techniques that will help you on the front end before the stressors come. So that you're, you have almost like a vaccine to it. Or an inoculation to stress when it hits you, because it's gonna hit you. And so we'll talk about that in a minute. What about you?

• 7:34Brendon Burchard?

  I love it.

• 7:35Ed Mylett?

  What's your fortress?

• 7:36Brendon Burchard?

  I want to emphasize the prayer piece too, especially for those people here who've never had a prayer or faith practice. Just something about, you're like, what, what is that power of prayer giving you? And what I learned, even if, you know, Christianity is not your thing, or any religion, that might not be your thing. What the practice is doing is you're taking a moment away from the no, noise. It's like, okay, I'm gonna take a moment away from the noise. And what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna get a hold of my self-talk right now. And his format and what you're learning as you learn about prayer, or if you want to do it as a meditation, or it's just a thought process, is you're opening up space for hope.

• 8:19Brendon Burchard?

  You're opening, okay, I don't know if I can handle this. This is a lot. Maybe I can do these things, but you know, the idea here, God, you take the rest, you take the wheel. Even if you don't believe in a God, what you're doing is you're opening up hope. Okay, there are some things I can't control, there are some things that I can, but I'm hoping this thing proceeds and moves through okay. And the second thing prayer is doing is you're anchoring into strength.

• 8:42Ed Mylett?

  That's right.

• 8:43Brendon Burchard?

  So for those of us who believe, we're anchoring into the strength of God. But I love what he said, he's asking for the strength to deal with the things. Not for the things necessarily to change, because maybe they were put there for you for a reason, even if you never can figure it out. The question is, can I deal with it better? And so you can anchor into your strength, even if you don't believe in a God, by simply for yourself saying, okay, what are the things that has made me successful in the past? What are the strengths that allowed me to get over that last problem? What do I tap into that I feel strong enough that I can overwhelm the problem like he talked about? I want you to realize, you've gotta break away from the noise

• 9:25Brendon Burchard?

  and get control of your mind and direct it to hope and to strength.

• 9:30Ed Mylett?

  Very good.

• 9:31Brendon Burchard?

  When you do that, no matter what your religious background, religious framework, or belief in a spirit, or a God, or a universe, or nothing, those work for you. But the most important thing I want you to hear him say, because this is what inspired me when you first told me this, is he does it daily. And a lot of people never bring hope into their life daily. They never remind themselves of their strengths. So every problem is bigger than they are.

• 9:55Ed Mylett?

  So true.

• 9:56Brendon Burchard?

  Every problem is huge and calamitous, because they're never anchoring back in. So write it down in your notes, just anchor back into strength.

• 10:04Ed Mylett?

  I want to ask you this, what about for you, the physical part of solving a problem? So I'll give you my answer after you give yours, but physiology to me is a huge piece in being resourceful and feeling strong about my problem. That thing you said earlier, brother, is so brilliant about standing. For me, and I'll let you go first, but for me, it's like, I wanna, I think stress and overwhelm to some extent is a neurochemistry. It's neurological, you begin to feel constricted and your breathing gets shallow and you're... And you know exactly what I mean, right? You start running that thought stacking thing and it's... And so for me, it's like, I gotta move my body.

• 10:40Brendon Burchard?

  Yeah.

• 10:40Ed Mylett?

  For me, I'm a physical person, I'm a physical being. So are you, you know, God says that your body is your... I won't keep preaching, by the way. But this temple thing, because I'm really not that guy, just so you know. So that's not... There are people in this room far more qualified than me. One of them's speaking after us here, John. But I will say to you, that temple thing's legit. Like, it's my strength and my energy is being housed in this body. I've got to get it in a resourceful state. I gotta shift my physiology, right? So I'm gonna do a lot of things in my body to deal with stress. I'll give you what a few of them are and then I'll let you go. One of mine is, I'll go train immediately. I'll go for a walk, I'll go for a run. I have to get outside. I want to get outdoors, I want to get out of this building. By the way, if you're like, it's raining today. I like it more when it's raining.

• 11:25Ed Mylett?

  I really do. I love just, oh, like, thank you, God, you're comforting me. I'm being baptized again, you know, like... Like, and by the way, because it's just a physical thing. You know how it is too, like, even this morning, I wasn't feeling great. I was like, what a great gift, I'm in the shower. Like, I was just, ah, you know, just, my physical state changed. So I want to get myself in a peak state. I do, it's a huge piece of dealing with stress for me. It's how I move my body, getting my heart rate under control. We'll talk about breathing in a minute, too. And one little other tiny piece I'll give you that really has worked for me the last few years is earthing and grounding. It's like, literally, literally, taking my shoes and socks off. I know this sounds like hokey stuff.

• 12:07Ed Mylett?

  And feeling the frequency of gravity and the earth's frequency under my feet.

• 12:13Brendon Burchard?

  Huge.

• 12:14Ed Mylett?

  Is a huge thing in reducing my stress. And so what I would just suggest to you is, what are the things you could be doing physically? Super hydrating myself. You know, a lot of times when stress hits, you're like, I'll get around to getting it. I gotta solve this, I'll get... No, you gotta be on the front end of these things. So for me, a lot of it, dealing with stress, is a physical thing for me.

• 12:34Brendon Burchard?

  Yeah.

• 12:34Ed Mylett?

  What about you?

• 12:34Brendon Burchard?

  Huge. And I think there's the acute level of dealing with stress. I feel stressed, so I gotta stand up, I gotta chigong, I gotta work out, I do those things. But then there's the constant release of stress throughout the day. I'm so tactical about this, you know this.

• 12:50Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 12:51Brendon Burchard?

  My wife and I recently built a home. And around the home, I had them put a track.

• 12:58Brendon Burchard?

  Like a, like, the, like, kinda like a dirt gravel track. And so, the first question, when you get on my schedule, is, I think, can I do that call with this person walking around the property? Not, "What's the Zoom link?" It's, I'm like, "Can I just, literally, throughout the day?" Because if I'm in front of Zoom all day, which, by the way, real quick stress thing, most stress is visual. There's so much stress. It's why he's like, "The lights are like this." It's very stressful. So, many of you, when you do Zoom, your laptop, when you're doing Zoom, listen, this is crazy. We did this study. When you have Zoom in front of you, which most people, it's too close. What I want you to do is push it back.

• 13:43Brendon Burchard?

  Because when your eyes are narrowed like this...

• 13:48Brendon Burchard?

  All day, your eyes are just like whacked out, looking close, this blue light smacking you, and you're there hour after hour after hour. Do walking calls. Get your butt out of that chair. There's no reason... You're building up stress throughout the day, or you're releasing stress throughout the day. I want you to teach yourself to release it. Create all these things that's releasing it, so it doesn't build up into the pipe burst, or the lightning strike. And that's so important. The second thing I do, so, throughout the day, I'm just walking. I'm, I'm walking...

• 14:16Ed Mylett?

  You are. I've never been on a call with you where you're not at least standing or moving around.

• 14:18Brendon Burchard?

  Yeah.

• 14:19Ed Mylett?

  Ever.

• 14:19Brendon Burchard?

  No one sees me sit backstage.

• 14:21Ed Mylett?

  Yep.

• 14:21Brendon Burchard?

  Almost ever.

• 14:22Ed Mylett?

  Yep.

• 14:23Brendon Burchard?

  Even during other... I'm always moving. I'm always moving. Just letting that, letting that energy out. And not because I have more energy, because I know that moving builds energy. That's my fortress. I'm building energy throughout the day. Second thing, I'm never depleted in my supplementation. It's like, "How does he have so much energy? I'm never depleted." So, if you came backstage with me, you will go downstairs and you look. It's like, it's like I'm a traveling pharmacy. I'm that... Y'all traveling pharmacies in the room? I have supplements on supplements on supplements downstairs, just in case.

• 14:54Ed Mylett?

  And he's not talking about Adderall. He's not, that's not what we're talking about.

• 14:57Brendon Burchard?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 14:58Ed Mylett?

  So, I know.

• 14:58Brendon Burchard?

  No, and I am, I used to own a supplement line, so I am crazy, like, like, crazy dialed in of like, "Oh, I need 100mg of Rhodiola, not 150." Like, I know my body enough. I've taught my body, like, "How does it feel? How does it move?" So, I'm always making sure that my brain and my body are already fueled, and have the, not only just the nutrition of my macros, protein, carbs, and fats. It's more important I have the supplementation for my brain. So for me, you know, "Oh, I thought you'd like this. I've never talked about this." I got my Rambo stack, which sounds so silly because I'm so small compared to him.

• 15:36Brendon Burchard?

  The Rambo stack: Rhodiola, Alpha GPC, Maka, Batzualya, and Omegas. And so 100mg of Rhodiola, 300 Alpha GPC, 500 Maka, 300 Batzualya. Batzualya, if you don't know what it is, is a herb that helps with inflammation. A lot of our brain problems are inflammation, and then Omegas, which are heart health, but actually more brain health than that. And I'd take that. And if I've got that base, Rhodiola, Alpha GPC, Maka, Batzualya, and Omegas. That's like my base. If I have that, I'm sharp, my brain's in a good place. It's energized, but it's not stressed. So that as a base. And I tell everyone, you should know what your base of good energy is, and make sure you're never depleted from that. Some of you, you might, you know, you might need a little bit more protein throughout the day,

• 16:21Brendon Burchard?

  and you'd be less angst-driven. I know it sounds so simple, but a lot of it is what he said, there's neurobiology that our own body and how it heats itself and runs itself is really key to whether or not we freak out mentally. So those two things, I'm constantly moving, which is letting go of that tension. And then I'm making sure I'm never depleted. So there's always food. There's, I mean, I'm from Montana, so there's food everywhere. There's always food. And I'm just, I don't run hangry. How many of you, your stress is really hangry? So I just don't get hangry, and that helps me.

• 16:55Ed Mylett?

  The other thing I would add is that I think sometimes stress reveals your actual emotional home. So we all have, so we all know this, but like the caliber, I talk about this in my book, but the caliber of our lives is really the quality of our emotions.

• 17:12Ed Mylett?

  So hey, guys, as you know, I've partnered up with my good friend Brennan Burchard, who's created the greatest personal development system that has ever been designed called Growth Day. There's everything from journaling to accountability programs, live messages every Monday from myself and other influencers. There's an opportunity for you to get courses that would cost thousands of dollars completely for free. It's incredible. Go to growthday.com/ed and check it out.

• 17:37Ed Mylett?

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• 18:20Ed Mylett?

  Go to ro.co/mylet to see if you qualify. That's R-O dot C-O slash my let to get started on Ro. For side effects of GLP-1 medications, including boxed warning, go to ro.co/safety. R-O dot C-O slash safety. So when I end up buying the island, we had to do all of our outdoor decorating, and I spent a fortune in the first half of the place. And I'm like, I don't want to do this anymore, but I want the best stuff. And that's where Wayfair came in. My wife wanted to get this new garden bed, and Wayfair was the place that offered the perfect solution. Wayfair also helps you create a home that stands up to real life with quality products, great value, and trusted reviews. Wayfair verified products are hand-vetted by product specialists that use a 10-point quality inspection system. Here's all I can tell you. The stuff has lasted over time.

• 19:04Ed Mylett?

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• 19:42Ed Mylett?

  Right, that's what we're all doing here today. Is we wanna feel something. So it's like, you say, "I wanna be worth a hundred million dollars." No, you don't. You want how you think that would make you feel.

• 19:53Ed Mylett?

  Right? "I want this amazing relationship with another person." True, but what you really want is how you think it would make you feel. Right? "I wanna be in a certain physical state of fitness," or whatever. Yeah, you really, it's how you think it would make you feel. So we all intuitively know that our lives are our emotions. I'll give you a story about that really quick. Where I was the wrong side of it. Um, which, I have a tradition of being often in my life. So I was, first time I'd ever finally made some money. Which took me a long time, but I'd finally made some bucks. And so, I was building my first, like, dream home. And it was a particularly stressful day. So, I don't recall what was all going on, but it was like a combination of, some client had canceled,

• 20:39Ed Mylett?

  and then the contractor had messed something up, and I was just wound up, man. And I was driving over, the house was under construction, and what was I doing? Thought stacking. "This guy, he's this." I'm blaming the contractor, I'm blaming my assistant who messed the appointment up. And I'm stacking it, and stacking it, and stacking it, and I'm getting overwhelmed, right? I'm also sitting stationary, driving for like an hour in Southern Cal traffic, so I'm not moving my body. It's like the perfect formula the other way, right? I had not done any real prayer work in my life before this time, and so, I'm like, really, I'm subjected to whatever the external conditions are in my life, are gonna give me the internal emotions. Which is how most people live. Someone treats me a particular way, it triggers an emotion. Some situation doesn't go my way, I go back to my emotional home.

• 21:23Ed Mylett?

  So, external stuff really ran my life. It runs most people's lives. The external tells us how we're gonna feel. And that's why, "I better have that hundred million bucks, I better get that jet, I better get that car, I better get that girl, I better get that guy." Cause then I can, that external stuff still dictates how I feel. That's a loose way to go through life, and you're very vulnerable if you continue to wait for the conditions to change how you feel. Right? And so, I walk in, and I'm pissed. So I walk in, and I'll never forget this, there was this mantle. "What's going on? Where is he? Toby?" And that, in those days, I was actually big. And maybe dabbling in some creatine at the time, so...

• 22:04Ed Mylett?

  Um, and so I walk in.

• 22:08Ed Mylett?

  It was, yeah, anyway. And so I walk in and I'm like, "Where is he?" And my wife's with me and she's like, "Hey Eddie, calm down, it's okay." Like, "It's not okay!" Right? And, and I look into the kitchen and there were these, there were six of these just beautiful men. They were great men. They were all, happened to be from Mexico. They were doing beautiful work on my cabinets in there. Now, remember this, and by the way, all they were doing here was trying to succeed for their families. Just make some money to send home to their wife and kids, right? And I'm walking into, these men are building my mansion, right? I'm the rich guy here. I walk in, and the ball is stressed and I look over and they got the mariachi music playing. They're kind of dancing and singing, backslapping each other.

• 22:54Ed Mylett?

  And here's what they got. They had joy, they had bliss, they had each other. Were doing work at the time that they were great at and that was meaningful for them. And if the quality of your life is the quality of your emotions, they're kicking my [bleep] in life. Just imagine how bad the conditions are where you are to have to do all of that to get here, right? And so, what ends up happening is I stood there for a minute, because I'm a, I'm a good human at my core. And I went, "What is wrong with me?" No, I'm being serious. I went, "What is wrong with me?"

• 23:28Ed Mylett?

  I have everything to be grateful for. These men have almost nothing. And yet, they're living a far higher quality of life than me. Way higher. And by the way, they have their version of stress. Like having no money, like being displaced from their wife and children. Like having to work in my mansion all day and on Saturdays. The, the joy of their day, seriously, was, I said, "Hey dudes, you guys all drink beer?" They're like, "Yeah." I go, "After this happened, I go, "I'm coming by on Friday with a bunch of corons. We're gonna sit here and chill at 5 o'clock." And I literally started to hang out with these dudes to understand how to be like them.

• 24:06Ed Mylett?

  It's true. Right? It's the truth. And what I uncovered there was, when stress hits, I go to my emotional home. And here's the thing, we all have an emotional home that we live in and we experience. So, for example, if your emotional home, in my opinion, is anger, or stress, or worry, or angst, or fear, somehow in a given week, or a given day, or a given month, you're gonna find a way to get your hit of it. You'll find a way. The conditions don't matter. You will find a way to get your hit of fear. You will find a way to get your hit of lack, or insecurity, don't you? Because it's your emotional home.

• 24:48Ed Mylett?

  So, no matter what happened, I was probably gonna find a way to get upset that week. Or worry. My emotional home is actually not anger or any of that. My emotional home is fear and worry. That's mine. Was. I think I've actually eradicated it. But my emotional home was fear and worry. When you grow up in an environment like many of you have, like me, that was not perfect, you just, I always said, I had someone on my show recently, Brendan, oh, it was Burt Kreischer, the comedian. And we were talking about his drinking. If you all know who Burt is, he drinks. And I was trying to help him work through it without being accusatory. And I said, "Burt, do you consider yourself a great father?" He goes, "I actually think I'm a great father." I asked him that as a preview question. And I said, "'Cause you know, the most debilitating thing for me with my dad was not that my dad drank and got angry, or was moody."

• 25:34Ed Mylett?

  I said, "You know what really happened, man? My dad made me worry about him as a little boy." And that thought stacking as a little boy of worrying about my daddy, is he driving? Is he coming home? Is he safe? Is he in a fight? Right? I would worry about my dad. And that conditioned me as a child to build that as part of my emotional home. The conditioning. So, not only, what happens is you condition emotions in your body, because your body is actually your subconscious, or technically your unconscious mind to some extent. John Gordon and I debate this all the time. However you look at it, the point is, is that you do condition emotions in your body. And so, then you learn to use your body that way. And so, I finally realized when I was in the kitchen that day with these guys, I'm like, I am conditioned.

• 26:19Ed Mylett?

  My emotional home is to find this fear and worry, because anger, really what anger is, it's the other side of fear. It's fear expressing itself a particular way. So, what I would, the reason I go that long to share all this with you is that you need to be evaluating what your actual emotional home is. Because when stress hits, you'll really find it. And so, I had to begin to condition myself to have the emotions that I want to experience. Which for me are like bliss and peace. I have a chapter in my book called equanimity. Which is basically peace or calmness under duress in an equanimous state. And so, that needs conditioning. So that I have, that's what I mean by the vaccine or inoculation.

• 27:03Ed Mylett?

  I'm not saying that when stress comes, you're not gonna go, "Oh, that's gonna happen." But I wanna have some defense against it prior to. And so, what I learned to do, condition the emotions I want to experience. How do you do that? You anchor them in your body. And so, without getting really deep into that today, when I'm in a peaceful, blissful state, I take advantage of it. So, when I'm in a beautiful state, I'm taking a walk on the beach a few weeks ago with my daughter. Which we did do. And, uh, just as we're walking, you know, I'm just anchoring this moment as we were walking. Anytime I'm through my prayer time, when I'm done with my prayer, I always pray on my knees. And the actual prayer is an anchor. So now, anytime I hit my knees,

• 27:48Ed Mylett?

  I have conditioned my body to automatically feel peace. So that when stress comes, I can hit my knees in prayer. And it's not just the prayer with God. It's the physical move of being on my knees. So what I would recommend you do when you're in emotional states, even like right now, find a physical move that's very simple. And when you begin to do that over, not the first time, not the third time, not the 19th time, but somewhere along the way, you can reverse engineer yourself out of that state. I'm not saying you won't be experiencing stress, but what I am saying is, when it hits, you can give it your move. You can give it your move. You can give it your move, whatever that is. You can give it your move. You can give it your move. Give it your move. And when that happens, your neurochemistry shift, because you've anchored the pattern, you've undone a pattern of being in that stress all the time.

• 28:31Ed Mylett?

  This is a huge thing. Takes time, takes some discipline. But I don't let good moments or good emotions go by. I anchor them. And by the way, you ever have a song come on that just reminds you of a great time in your life? That's an anchor to a moment. It's not the sound of the beat in the music. It reminds you of a time. I wore a T-shirt the other day. We'll see how old the audience is. Watch this. I wore a T-shirt the other day flying out here that was the Regal Beagle. Whoa. See, like, the audience I talked to three days ago were all like 30 and under. They would literally have no idea. I literally mentioned U2 to this audience a few months ago. No clue who U2 was. I'm like, I'm old. Me and him went to the U2 concert together. You did.

• 29:14Ed Mylett?

  You mentioned us two dancing at U2, two dudes alone at the U2. We had the best time at the concert. But by the way, anytime like With or Without You comes on, I'm like, ah, pride in the name of love. I'm like, yeah, baby. It's not the song. It's what was going on when that song was happening. You know what I'm talking about, right? He did look at me kinda odd in the concert. Yeah, it was weird. It was weird. It was weird. I want to jump off something you're saying. But anyway, that will help you a great deal, anchoring the right emotion. So good.

• 29:49Ed Mylett?

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• 30:34Ed Mylett?

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• 31:17Ed Mylett?

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• 31:51Brendon Burchard?

  I've wanted to ask you something. I think it'll be a great flip of this emotional home idea. And I want you to all hear this too, because the emotional home that you have, think about this, the emotional home that you have is also a homing beacon for other people.

• 32:08Ed Mylett?

  Yeah. Really good.

• 32:12Brendon Burchard?

  So if you're in anger and stress and overwhelmed and upset, I really do believe you start to attract your justifications.

• 32:20Ed Mylett?

  Wow, very good, bro.

• 32:22Brendon Burchard?

  I have all the reason to be pissed at the world. There's unfairness, there's lack, there's lack of equality, there's upset, there's jerks, there's mean people, there's Republicans and Democrats and independents, and there's my neighbor who built onto my yard and ran over my bush. You could just go like, there's all the, you're, you are justified in your anger. You can always just, you can build all the architecture of argument that you want for justifications why the world sucks, everyone else sucks, you got no shots, everything is unfair, and nothing's going to turn out. You can build that architecture and you can justify it. And as you justify that, your justifications start to attract people like that, just like your emotional home attracts people.

• 33:05Brendon Burchard?

  Like the reason I was attracted in his world is because there's love here, there's care here, there's edge here, there's strength here. His emotional home attracted and created our friendship.

• 33:17Brendon Burchard?

  And there's a lot of people who we are equally repelled by because that's not their their emotional home is just not, you know what I'm saying? Like, you can feel it on humans. This is not like some law of attraction. This is actually something called sociology.

• 33:33Ed Mylett?

  Yep.

• 33:35Brendon Burchard?

  Emotional contagion is one of the most validated and highly correlated social influence things. Your emotions, people feel it, the energy shifts and they move around it. And either they move towards you or they move away from you. And so what I'd love to ask with that truth, with first, realize your emotional home is also a homing device.

• 33:56Ed Mylett?

  Great point.

• 33:57Brendon Burchard?

  For people. So beware, it's not just how you feel, it's who you are attracting. I want to feel great because the people I want to attract are great.

• 34:07Ed Mylett?

  So good.

• 34:08Brendon Burchard?

  So I wonder, because I think a lot of stress and overwhelm in people's lives are people around them, forgive my language, who piss them off.

• 34:16Ed Mylett?

  Yep.

• 34:17Brendon Burchard?

  Right? Do you have anyone in your life, forgive the language, who just keeps pissing you off? And there, is that, does anyone have somebody in your life who they're the majority of the stress in your life? Anyone have that?

• 34:27Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 34:28Brendon Burchard?

  Okay, don't name your children, but just listen. So how, how do you deal with that? Because you, Ed runs hot.

• 34:37Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 34:38Brendon Burchard?

  Right? So when you get, when you feel that and it's about other people, how do you deal with that? Because it's not just a situation or tasks.

• 34:45Ed Mylett?

  I've had to, I've had to reduce or eliminate a few of those people. Like, I just finally went, you're just not, it's, this isn't reciprocated at all. Like, you're constantly bringing me stress and toxicity and constriction and no expansion, no love, no bliss. And it's, this feels very one way to me. And so I've had to reduce proximity to some and in some cases, over time, not have them in my life. That's the one answer. Now I'm gonna give you the other one, it sounds completely contradictory, but it's a gift you can give yourself. And that is that when I'm going through a stressful time.

• 35:18Ed Mylett?

  I, this is something I've worked on, so, because I do run hot, but you know me really well. Also, on the other side of it, it's like, I have a patience that I didn't have when I was younger. And what I do, when I feel the most helpless, which is when stress hits, this sounds nutty. I try to get the most helpful. What can I, this sounds nuts, but like, it's a practice somebody taught me many years ago, Wayne Dyer. And I'm like, so when stress hits, I've got this thing over here. Believe it or not, I'm like, who can I help right now? I know that sounds nuts, you're like, once I eliminate, all my focus has to go here. Then I'll go, no, I actually, there's something that happens to me supernaturally, when I'm like, I've got this going on. Who can I help right now? What can I help?

• 35:58Ed Mylett?

  A few weeks ago, you and I had a situation where I was in a pretty stressful situation and you were, and I just, the thing at your house. Hey man, do you need anything? Can I help you? My, I have another very good friend that you know as well as too, it was like, man, I got this going, I would like to be able to deal with this, but I've got to help them. So that's one, is when I'm helpless, I get the most helpful. Secondly, believe it or not, for me, it's extending grace to somebody. Grace, so grace is, the extension of grace to another person is actually the ultimate gift you're giving yourself. Because I can give you grace when I'm feeling great about my own life. Can I give you grace when I'm under duress? Right? And I'll give you an example of it. This is a huge thing. By the way, you just feel great about you when you have elevated yourself past your normal conditioning.

• 36:43Ed Mylett?

  Do you know what I mean? There's a part of you that, man, I have grown. I am giving grace to this person who has not deserved it or earned it right now. Serious. And all of a sudden, the actual gift that's reciprocated, you're like, wow, I've really grown. And what also happens, it sends a message to you, I'm a good person. My intentions are good. I deserve to have this work out in my favor. A lot of times, when stuff starts happening not so good in your life, the only way for me to do it is like, I just give grace. And when I give grace to another person, I'm like, I, no, I am good. I do deserve it. I am growing. Most people wouldn't give this person grace right now. Even often, listen to me. Even though we're not assessing blame, you kind of know where this came from. Can you give grace to where it came from?

• 37:29Ed Mylett?

  Okay, can you give grace to where it came from? Who may be the cause of this? Who may be the root of it? Who may be giving you... Can you elevate past the normal human who reciprocates? You elevate past it and you extend grace and understanding to them. Because you don't know what someone's carrying. Hurt people, hurt people. People in pain typically create pain. "Man, it's taken me about 50 years to get this." "Why is this person behaving this way?" "Is it that there's some demon walking on earth?" No, probably not. What it is, is there's some conditioning in them that's causing them to act this way. "I'm gonna do everything I've got not to assess and judge this person and to extend grace to them." Now, there are some people that you and I both have extended grace to repeatedly, like,

• 38:12Ed Mylett?

  "Okay, you get my grace, but you don't get my friendship anymore." Right? We've got that. Cut of those people. But let me give you an example of it really quick. About two weeks ago, I'm at dinner with my family. And, um, pretty nice restaurant. Not the nicest, but it was a nice place. And when I walked in, I could hear kids screaming. Now, because I'm an introvert, I like quiet restaurants. I like to eat in quiet. I'm not a big sports bar guy. I don't know if you... Some people love the vibe and I'm in the mix. I don't like the mix. I like the quiet table in the back. Nobody can see me. Nobody recognizes me. And I can hear the people I'm with and have a conversation. Maybe that's a novel concept to a lot of people. I'm also very familiar with what an inside voice should sound like.

• 38:53Ed Mylett?

  You know what I'm talking about? You have those people like, "They have no idea that the whole restaurant..." Or the person at the airport on their phone. I'm like, "Dude, I know that you're in Louisiana and they're in Texas, but this device right here transmutates your volume to them." You don't have to talk like they gotta hear you in Texas. You ever have those people like, "Dude, you're 52 years old. You have not figured out an inside voice yet?" Right? Okay? Can I extend grace to that guy? Right? So we walk into the restaurant. I can hear these kids. And I want a nice night with my family. My kids are back home from college. I don't get to talk to them all the time in person. We sit down at the table. Guess who we sit next to? That table. And somehow, I'm not even sure how it all worked out.

• 39:36Ed Mylett?

  There were five kids at this table that all looked the exact same age to me. With two parents. Like, they were all like, three, or four. How do they? Cause they're different faces. You didn't have like quintuplets, like. I don't know how they all arrived there. I couldn't quite figure it out. But anyway, they're loud. And then the kids start running laps around the table. You ever do this thing where you're like, hey, uh, to the parents, you're like, what is? I would never let my kids behave that way. You ever have to say that out loud? Here's what's really interesting. And by the way, and it was loud. I'm talking like at some point, they were actually throwing food and it was stressful. And the parents were like, their heads were down. Here's what's really interesting. I'm serious too, and I'm proud of me for this. And I mean it, about, about dealing with stress. My kids were even bothered by it, who are usually not the ones.

• 40:19Ed Mylett?

  I said, let's just extend them some grace. And I actually said, you guys want to say a prayer for them? So I had a quick prayer for them, and then Bella goes, daddy, let's get their dinner too. You're pushing me. You're pushing me. Okay, so these people that are taking over the restaurant, you can see how they're going. We prayed for the, I'm not kidding you, we extended grace. Cause I keep talking about this with my kids. I want my children to live this way. And I want part of their emotional home and their anchoring to be in grace and in peace for people. And so, this is amazing. We did say a prayer for them. I mean, and my kids are at that age, like, dad, we gotta say another prayer.

• 41:04Ed Mylett?

  I'm like, let's just say a quick prayer, nothing big, just I'll say a quick prayer. I'm like, and then I did this, I go, Max, say the prayer. I made my son say the prayer. He goes, alright dad, bow your head. These insane children over there and their lack of understanding, parents, we're praying. Anyway, he says the prayer. It wasn't the prayer, it was a kind prayer. So we get them grace, we're under, so giving, the point is, the lesson was, giving grace to somebody when you're under stress. We gave them grace, they leave, I pay the bill. Pay our bill, we leave. Two days later, I'm hitting balls at a golf course. And the guy who was my server was there, he goes, Mr. Mylett, we had such a great time. That was kind of you to buy dinner for that family in light of what was going on. I went, what was going on?

• 41:48Ed Mylett?

  He goes, oh, they'd come back from the funeral of their grandmother.

• 41:53Ed Mylett?

  And the husband there was in the military. And so they used to regularly come in here. I've never seen the kids behave like that. But the daughter, the wife, was the daughter of the mom. She was just inconsolable when they came in. And the grandmother had actually lived with them for years when the husband was deployed. And so they're really emotional. And so I go, man, I'm really glad I gave them grace. So you don't know in someone's situation what they're carrying and what they're going through. So that was a, that was an example of that. Go ahead.

• 42:25Brendon Burchard?

  Yeah, that's beautiful. Let me give you a tactical thing about grace to say to yourself. And this has been, it's a different kind of grace, but it's really powerful in my life. I say to myself all the time, oh, their thing doesn't have to be my thing. But their thing to them is the real thing. And I'm always saying that, oh, their thing doesn't have to be my thing. But their thing is the real thing to them. And so their stress, their anxiety, but also listen for the world we live in. Their opinions, their values, their beliefs, their upsets, their arguments. I don't have to take those in personally.

• 43:10Brendon Burchard?

  Those things don't come into my heart. I can give them the grace of the freedom of their speech. I can give them the grace of the freedom of their beliefs. I can give them the grace of the freedom of whatever argument they're making, they believe it. I don't have to get upset and angered. I don't have to flip out and feel divisive against everybody all the time. I go, that's real for them. And by not blaming them or being condescending. I think a lot of our energy, societally, is very stressful because we're also condescending and arrogant towards others. And we think we have to change them for them to have the right to exist.

• 43:55Brendon Burchard?

  And the big thing is, I don't stress about big things like that. Because I just go, oh, for them, that's totally real. It's just like, listen, the way to survive in your marriage is to realize, she has other ideas that aren't yours, dude.

• 44:12Brendon Burchard?

  The way to survive in a marriage is to realize he's got feelings he's not communicating to you. And maybe that emotion's coming from something. The way to survive in a marriage is to realize that they just have different thoughts than you. And you don't have to bulldoze them. You also don't have to accept them. You definitely don't have to feel them. I don't feel other people's perspective. I allow them to have it because they deserve it. It's theirs. So for me, grace is that. It's like, oh, I am separate and apart. Even though I believe in oneness, even though I know God connects us, he made us individual. Because we're each an individual beautiful prize. And so to me, I just go, oh, I don't have to feel that negativity from them. I'm around a lot of people,

• 44:57Brendon Burchard?

  especially, you know, Ed and I work with a lot of sports people. I mean, they have a lot of energy. And a lot of their energy can be very competitive. And it can feel at and against and intense and very angry. And I witnessed that all the time, nothing comes in.

• 45:17Brendon Burchard?

  Buddha was rumored to say, and later it got attributed to Indira Gandhi, the idea that when someone goes to hand you anger, you don't have to accept the gift. When someone goes to hand their emotions, or here's my secret to life, you ready? When people go to hand me their drama, none of it comes in. I can listen, it's part of being a coach. I can listen, but I don't feel it. I can listen, I can empathize, but it doesn't take me off my center. Someone can tell me the most obnoxious or rude or awful thing. They can scream in my face. And believe this has happened a lot because I've worked with some elite military units. And they like to get at me because I look like this.

• 46:02Ed Mylett?

  Exactly.

• 46:03Brendon Burchard?

  They love me in the military.

• 46:04Ed Mylett?

  Are you proud of me for coming out like that? I promised them I would one time come out and skip like him. I'll never do it again. I did promise I would do it once.

• 46:11Brendon Burchard?

  He just wanted to show off those guns.

• 46:13Ed Mylett?

  By the way, whatever, yeah. That's getting deleted from the YouTube.

• 46:18Ed Mylett?

  I have a reputation to maintain. I'm just kidding, I'm just kidding.

• 46:22Brendon Burchard?

  But they hit me with so much intensity. And you can imagine how many times Ed and I go to a conference, and they don't know who we are. And they're in the audience and they're sitting like this. If we go to serve them, and we let that infiltrate us, we can't serve from our highest. And so, remember that when your kids are freaking out. If you let that freak out infiltrate and lock you off your center, you can't serve them your highest as your parent. So you train yourself to go, "Oh, that's theirs. I don't have to take that personally, or feel offense, or condescension, or antagonism." They can have that. I don't have to accept it.

• 47:06Brendon Burchard?

  I don't have to justify it. I don't have to go against it. It's a huge shift in my life. I just don't take people's drama. Can I say it another way?

• 47:14Ed Mylett?

  You are great at that. And you've been great at reminding me of that a few times, too. It's one of your... One thing on the athlete thing, on stress. A lot of things with athletes, it's the same as humans, it's just a microcosm. But one of the things that causes stress is like an addiction or obsession to the outcome. So, I'll give you an example, like, I won't say who. Like, take a golfer. When I'll ask them, when they're over a putt on like a Saturday playing with their buddies, it's a six-foot putt. I'm like, "How much stress do you have?" They're like, "Not a lot." I said, "Okay, what if it's a six-foot putt on a Saturday in a tournament to make the cut?" They're like, "More." I said, "Okay, what if it's a six-foot putt to win the Masters, or the US Open?" Stress level goes up.

• 47:57Ed Mylett?

  So what ends up happening is there's a difference between having a goal and having an outcome. There's a subtle difference. And so, I'm all for goals. But in the moments of executing something, it's our addiction to the outcome and trying to control an unknown outcome that creates the most stress. And here's what it is. I'll give you the putt, but it'll be most of the stressful situations you go through. So I'll take my golf, I'll throw it, I'll say, "So, what's the actual stress? Is it the missing the putt? Really? Or is it this? And this gets really deep. If I miss this putt..." What's it mean to me? What are other people gonna think about me? What are they going to say about me?

• 48:38Ed Mylett?

  And so the actual, what happens when a player, an athlete, is afraid they're gonna lose or miss, isn't the loss. It's, believe it or not, it's a normal human condition. What are people gonna think if I lose? What are they gonna say? This is gonna be on video. They're gonna repeat this. And in your case, most of the stress you've got is actually your addiction to getting the outcome that you wanted, as opposed to having a goal. And so there's a nuance between doing everything you can to prepare for something, and then separating from the outcome. Because this is something you can't control. So if you actually deduce whatever stressful situation, I'll take the one that I'm in right now. And if I actually just, I'm gonna do everything I can. I've got a goal to make it look this way, but I'm not so addicted to the outcome because that's what's creating the stress for me.

• 49:23Ed Mylett?

  The stress is, if I don't get it, then this is gonna happen, and then people will think this, and then I'll have to... Like, let's say right now, in your case, it's a stressor on money. Like, I've gotta get this account, or I lost this account. It's not just that, it's like, well, what if that account means that I don't have any money and I lose my house? And then what people are gonna think if I lose my house? And you start stacking it back all the way because you're so addicted to the outcome. So there's a nuance in life, in sports, where you prepare and prepare and prepare, and you've got a goal, but once you have to execute, you have to reduce the pressure. And that you're not outcome-focused. You're not outcome-focused in the moment. Because every time you're thinking about outcome, you're projecting into the future. You're technically not present. If I'm over a putt and I'm worried about what happens five seconds from now when I miss it,

• 50:08Ed Mylett?

  I'm no longer in the present over the putt. I'm five seconds from now worrying about the miss. And so a lot of the stress, you have to be fully present to solve something. You can't be in the future of what it'll mean if you don't. Or what it'll mean if you do. I know this sounds really deep, but every single second I'm projecting, even two seconds from now into the future, means I'm not fully present in the best putter, or the best phone call, or the best repair thing, or the best client thing, or the best coaching call, even when you're gonna coach somebody, because most of your coaching. Your stress about that is what happens if the outcome doesn't go well? What if you don't deliver? What if they don't get the account? What if they don't like your coaching? And that's something that's happening 10 to 20 to 30, whatever, minutes or seconds from now. You're there mentally and physically now.

• 50:52Ed Mylett?

  You're absent mentally when you're overdoing something physically. I know it sounds Ramsay Pamsey, but I hope that helps you. Separate from outcome and be fully present over what you need to execute in. That's a difference than having a goal. Does that make sense?

• 51:04Brendon Burchard?

  So good.

• 51:07Brendon Burchard?

  So good.

• 51:10Brendon Burchard?

  So good, man.

• 51:11Ed Mylett?

  Thank you. So are you.

• 51:12Brendon Burchard?

  What's crazy is when we hang out, we actually do talk like this.

• 51:15Ed Mylett?

  We actually do.

• 51:16Brendon Burchard?

  It's about the process driven. Oh, yeah. It's so good. I want to give you a chance to share a parting message with them about this topic and about their lives in this year.

• 51:25Ed Mylett?

  Nobody... There's two people here today that have tremendously impacted my life. You and John Gordon. That have tremendously changed my life and impacted. Let me give you the biggest, highest compliment I could give both you and John, who's up next. There are a lot of things that I do in my life when I have decisions to make. And I actually think to myself, what would Brendan do here? What would John do here? It's ironic that John's coming up next. Just want you to know who you're going to hear from. But that's the highest compliment I could give another person. How would they handle this? What would they think? And then oftentimes, I'll call both of them and say, how would you handle this? Which is pretty cool, the people that you think of. But I just want to acknowledge you, bro. You're that person for me. This is such a loving, caring, brilliant being. He just is like as good as you. And by the way.

• 52:10Ed Mylett?

  And by the way. Incredibly strong. Brendan is such a strong man. I know I got to say this quickly and I will give a parting. But Brendan is such a strong man that he feels no need to posture his strength. He's just authentically himself. He's such a strong man that there's no bravado with him. There's none of that. He is so strong in who he is and what he stands for and what he knows and what he believes in, that he doesn't invest any energy in trying to prove that to you. And to me, that's the sign of a truly strong person. And you are that, bro. And so is John. I love you.

• 52:44Ed Mylett?

  You really are.

• 52:45Brendon Burchard?

  Thank you.

• 52:46Ed Mylett?

  Yeah. You really are. In terms of a parting thought. One thing, because we didn't get to it, because I said sleep earlier. Just one thing, because you said it earlier. I just want to give you one little thing and then I'll give you a parting thought. Sleep is a big deal. Sleep's a big deal. I slept for 12 hours last night. I went to bed last night. I'm in a very stressful situation. It's not, everything's fine, right? But I... I wanted to really load up on sleep. And it's the one thing we rob ourselves of, and it's hard to sleep when we go through this. I slept from 6:30 last night to 6:30 this morning. And I haven't done that in years. So just want to say that sleep is required, and it's a big thing that he believes in as well. The parting thought is this, is that you need to remind yourself of who you are.

• 53:29Ed Mylett?

  And I said earlier that you're built for this, but the other part of it is this, it's just really simple. I've said this literally probably a million times to myself in my life, and I'll just say it to you. You were born to do something great with your life. And that there's a plan for your life, and there's a destiny for it. And all of these things that are coming along are learning lessons. And if you can just remind yourself, I was born to do something great in big ways and small ways. And don't negotiate the price you're paying all the time. When we go through stress, one of the things we do is start negotiating, is it worth it? Should I keep doing it? That's a scarcity and poverty mindset. When I was a poor person, when I would walk into a store, I wouldn't get what I wanted. I would get what I could afford. And everything I did, like you relate to this too, it was flipping price tags over, wasn't it? What's this cost? What's this cost? What's this cost? What's this cost? What's this cost?

• 54:14Ed Mylett?

  That's not a great way to go through life. Excuse me. Metaphorically, a lot of people do that during stress. What's this cost? What's this cost? What's this cost? What's this cost? Instead of saying, what am I worth? What am I worth? I'm worth this. I'm worth solving this. I was born to do something great with my life. I was born to do something great with my life. Here's what I know about you. All your life, you've known that. When you were a little girl or a little boy, you just knew you're supposed to do something special. There's this thing in you, and you're just on fire. Your heart feels it. You don't know why you're this way, but you've always been this way. And then as you got older and older and older, it got away from you. But when you were a kid, a little boy or a little girl, there was probably one person who made you feel that way.

• 54:59Ed Mylett?

  Probably one. It was a grandma, your mom, a coach, a teacher. They just, when they looked at you, you felt something, right? Can you think of who that person is right now if you had them? I hope you had them. Just, they just made you feel special. Mine was my papa, my grandfather, I'm named after him. He would just look at me, man. And he used to tell me, you're gonna do something awesome with your life, Eddie. He would drive me in his little blue van on Sundays, we'd go get donuts before church. And he had all these grandkids, I was the oldest. He goes, you know, you're my favorite.

• 55:34Ed Mylett?

  And every time, every time, I would look up at him, I am big papa. He goes, you're the special one. I am, because I had a dad who didn't tell me that. I am, he goes, "You're the strong one, you're the special one. God gave you, look at those blue eyes you got, man, those are Papa's blue eyes." And he would tell me this over and over and over and over again. Every time another grandkid was born, he'd call me, he goes, I remember this. "Hey, you know, your Auntie Jean, Cousin Peter was born this morning. He's amazing, Eddie." I go, "He is, tell me, yeah, he's seven pounds, three ounces, he's amazing. But...

• 56:11Ed Mylett?

  You're my favorite." He would tell me, "You probably had that person, maybe there's, I pray you did." And, and let me say this something, if you thought about them just for a little while, you'd get emotional. Maybe they're gone and you just miss them. What I would just say to you is, they were right. They were right, the rest of the world may not have seen it, but they did. And if you don't have that person, I could tell you, God sees you that way. I call everybody, I call everybody brother or sister. I call everybody brother or sister, and maybe it's hokey. I actually do that to remind them how connected we are. "Hey, brother, hey, brother, hey, sister, hey, sister, look at you all crying right now." Because that person was right.

• 56:53Ed Mylett?

  And so my parting message to you is to remind you that you were born to do something great with your life, and you ought to anchor that, man, so that when stress comes, you're like, "I'm built for this, I am built for this, I got an emotional home." And you may get at it for a few minutes, but I always return to equanimity, I always return to peace, I always return to faith, I always return to stress. You've got to remind yourself, you were born to do something awesome with your life, and you were, because that would be my parting message.

• 57:16Speaker 03

  Ed Milat, ladies and gentlemen.

• 57:20Ed Mylett?

  Thank you. Hey, that was awesome. Thanks, you guys. Thank you. Thank you. See you soon.