NOT ME SAVING SOMEONE Ft. Kendahl Landreth and Jordan Myrick

Kendahl Landreth and Jordan Myrick are here this week!! They join Drew to talk botched surgeries, being objectified by airline pilots, appendix explosions, their deep love for the Fast and Furious franchise, Kendahl working as a gym janitor, adult dodgeball leagues, and so much more. Shop Billie in-store and at ⁠https://www.mybillie.com https://www.mybillie.com/ Kendahl IG: https://www.instagram.com/kendahllandreth/?hl=en Kendahl Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kendahllandreth?lang=en Jordan IG: https://www.instagram.com/jordanmyr1ck/?hl=en Jordan Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jordanmyr1ck?lang=en Follow The Comment Section on IG! https://www.instagram.com/thecommentsection/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy https://acast.com/privacy for more information.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:31Speaker 01

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• 1:03Speaker 02

  I feel like those movies give a vibe of, they're like, we'll just kill a kid. You know what I mean? Like, I mean, in L.A., it's like, they just kidnap a baby. They should just kill someone. Yeah. Maybe a child. Yeah, but like, children's movies now don't give that off. Children's movies now are like, uh, two pigeons eat a meatball together. It's like, fine. Do you know what I mean?

• 1:25Drew Afualo?

  Hey, everyone, and welcome back to another episode of the Comment Section Show, starring me, your babe, everybody knows me, who cares about me. Onto the guest today. We have a duo, a couple, and two hilarious bitches. Next to me, the one and only, Jordan and Kendall.

• 1:43Drew Afualo?

  Welcome to the show. So excited to be here.

• 1:45Speaker 02

  This is such a treat.

• 1:46Drew Afualo?

  Look at us.

• 1:47Speaker 02

  Look at us.

• 1:48Drew Afualo?

  All together.

• 1:49Speaker 02

  It feels good.

• 1:51Drew Afualo?

  We're just cheesing at each other so hard.

• 1:54Speaker 02

  I could do this forever. Just smile at you.

• 1:57Drew Afualo?

  I feel like we've known each other forever, but this is our first time meeting in person, which is very exciting.

• 2:01Speaker 02

  It feels really crazy. I mean, obviously, we've been fans of you forever.

• 2:04Drew Afualo?

  Likewise.

• 2:05Speaker 02

  And we love your sister.

• 2:06Drew Afualo?

  I know, we have a mutual love of my sister.

• 2:08Speaker 02

  Yeah, and she's been on our podcast.

• 2:11Drew Afualo?

  Love.

• 2:11Speaker 02

  And we met and we were just like, oh, yeah, we love you.

• 2:14Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, connection.

• 2:15Speaker 02

  And, yeah, so I think because we have so much love for her, we feel like we also know you really well, which we don't and is rude.

• 2:23Drew Afualo?

  It's all the same, honestly. Jason's like a carbon copy of me at this point.

• 2:27Speaker 04

  Sure.

• 2:27Drew Afualo?

  Now that her hair's gone back dark, uh, she gets confused for me a lot.

• 2:31Speaker 04

  Oh.

• 2:31Drew Afualo?

  And I think a lot of people think I'm naturally smaller, like they think I'm short.

• 2:36Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:36Drew Afualo?

  I don't know if people, do people, are people shocked when they meet you in person?

• 2:38Speaker 04

  Anytime we meet anyone, they go, "You're massive." "You're humongous."

• 2:44Drew Afualo?

  I'm like, "All right." You're huge.

• 2:45Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 2:45Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 2:46Speaker 04

  You're huge.

• 2:47Drew Afualo?

  I always get, "Huge."

• 2:48Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:48Drew Afualo?

  Not too much on me.

• 2:50Speaker 04

  What of it? Yeah.

• 2:51Drew Afualo?

  You ham right.

• 2:52Speaker 04

  Yeah. I think what's sick about it is that in my head, I think a lot of people who are really tall feel really tall, like they grow up being like, "Oh yeah, I'm really insecure about being tall."

• 2:59Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 3:00Speaker 04

  And I think I've always been like, "I'm a really small baby." Like, "I'm so tiny."

• 3:06Drew Afualo?

  You're living in a different world.

• 3:07Speaker 04

  I really am. So when people are like, "Oh, you're tall," I'm like, "Oh, weird. I think we were all picturing me as just so, I don't know, small."

• 3:13Drew Afualo?

  Let's all just agree I'm small.

• 3:14Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 3:15Speaker 02

  And I'm the exact opposite. I've now evened out, where I'm a pretty normal height. I'm like 5'8", 5'9", but I hit 5'7" maybe in the first grade, so I was gigante. I was huge.

• 3:27Drew Afualo?

  That's a little frightening.

• 3:28Speaker 02

  I was bigger than the teachers. Parents were approaching me being like, "Homework." I was like, "I'm 5." So I, in my mind, like when I see WNBA players, I'm like, "You and me both, sister." You and me both, right?

• 3:39Drew Afualo?

  You're all, the only thing that's stopping me is, is time. I just don't have time.

• 3:42Speaker 02

  Yes, absolutely.

• 3:43Drew Afualo?

  To go try out for the W.

• 3:44Speaker 02

  Absolutely, but I'm not that tall anymore. But I feel very, you know, it's, it feels like part of my identity.

• 3:48Drew Afualo?

  Right. I was like, uh, I was 5'4". I'm like, cut to the clips of me saying how tall I've been forever, but I was 5'4" when I was 10, so I've been a big girl for a minute.

• 3:56Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 3:57Drew Afualo?

  I've been a grown man for a minute.

• 3:58Speaker 02

  I love that.

• 3:59Drew Afualo?

  And I feel like when fans meet me in public too, they're always really shocked at how tall I am, because they're like, "Oh, you meant tall, like tall, tall." I'm like, "Yeah, I don't know what you, y'all consider tall," but I do relate to what you said about feeling smaller, because my family in general, like, other than the women in my family, like my mom and sister are both short, all of the men in my family are really tall and have always been larger. So my skew of height has always been like, "Oh, like, they're not very tall, they're tall." Like, tall to me is anything over like 6'2".

• 4:28Speaker 04

  Right, right.

• 4:29Drew Afualo?

  Where 6 feet is tall to most people.

• 4:32Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:32Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 4:32Speaker 02

  Yeah. I also come from a tall family. My grandma's 6 feet tall.

• 4:36Drew Afualo?

  Oh, t, love that.

• 4:37Speaker 04

  I don't, well, I don't come from a very tall family, but can I?

• 4:41Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, you can tell it, you can tell it.

• 4:44Speaker 02

  Sure. And I don't want to get in trouble for this, because it was an accident.

• 4:49Speaker 04

  I had been like a while ago, Jordan was like, well Kendall's family is actually really short. Um, really, really short. And I was like, not really. I was like, my dad's like six foot and my mom's like five eight. And Jordan's like, your dad is not six foot. My dad was in a wheelchair. And I think Jordan realized that they were like, I think in my head, your dad was like that height. I was like, he's sitting down. He's been sitting down every time you've met him.

• 5:13Drew Afualo?

  You can tell it. I don't want to get in trouble for it. He thought it was funny. We all laughed.

• 5:20Speaker 02

  We all had a good time. That's how much I didn't see his wheelchair.

• 5:22Speaker 04

  Well, right.

• 5:24Speaker 02

  I said, that's just a short man. You saw the person beneath it. I said, that man is four foot seven.

• 5:29Speaker 04

  You hadn't even noticed.

• 5:30Speaker 02

  I didn't even know he was sitting down.

• 5:31Speaker 04

  And I do think, it was a weird thing because my dad was always in a wheelchair. Like I grew up with my dad in a wheelchair and I think I was like, oh, I'd never really, I didn't think about his height. Like when my mom was like, well, your dad's tall. There is this weird like, I haven't seen it.

• 5:43Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 5:43Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, don't be rude.

• 5:44Speaker 04

  You could be lying.

• 5:45Speaker 02

  It's kind of like, for what? You know what I mean? Oh, he's actually tall. Okay.

• 5:49Drew Afualo?

  Sure. Do you want to know something insane?

• 5:51Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 5:52Drew Afualo?

  So my, my fiance is, he's six four, but he has a, him and his brother only share a mom. They have two different dads. So he, my man is really tall. His brother is six three. His mom is not very tall. She's like five seven, five six maybe. So I've always wondered, I've always like, it's crazy that Jared is so tall, like his, his younger brother. I was like, he's lucky because I think he got the height, because I know what his biological dad looks like and he's not tall either. So I'm like, that height must come from your mom's side. And so I was talking to my man about it. I was like, I'm so curious, like, was your grandpa tall? And because he was raised by his grandparents and his mom. And my fiance goes, I don't know. My grandpa was always in a wheelchair. Isn't that so crazy?

• 6:37Speaker 04

  Right.

• 6:38Drew Afualo?

  It's so strange. He was like, I honestly don't know because he's always been in a wheelchair. Because he is a vet and he was, he was an amputee. So he was in a wheelchair his entire life.

• 6:46Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 6:47Drew Afualo?

  Uh, and like Billy's entire life. So when he told me, I was like, I'm so sorry. I felt rude for asking. Because I like forgot, I knew he was in a wheelchair, but I forgot. I was like, was he tall? I can't remember all the pictures I've seen. He's sitting down.

• 6:57Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 6:58Drew Afualo?

  Permanently, you know.

• 6:59Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 6:59Drew Afualo?

  That's weird. We have almost identical.

• 7:01Speaker 02

  Well, because you're taking out a tape measure and you're measuring.

• 7:04Speaker 04

  Right.

• 7:05Speaker 02

  Sorry.

• 7:05Drew Afualo?

  My phone, can I see a driver's license?

• 7:07Speaker 02

  Yeah. And they can lie on that too. I'm lying on mine.

• 7:11Drew Afualo?

  I know, I know. Mine says I'm one thirty. Yeah, right.

• 7:16Speaker 02

  Mine says I'm 5'3", 130.

• 7:17Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, okay. Isn't that so funny that anytime I'm like asked my weight, I went on a horseback riding lesson the other day and they were like, what's your weight for this poor horse that I'm about to climb onto? I'm like putting 30 pounds less than I weigh. It's like, who is this for? Like, this is, this horse is probably gonna die from getting on it. It takes the horse season. Yes, it's like so bizarre, but you just are like trained for me at a age, just do 30 pounds, like a little bit less. I'm like so confident, I have, you know, body positivity and so for this poor horse, I'm like, I'm really small. No shit.

• 7:51Speaker 02

  Well, it's like when you go to the doctor and they're like, get on the scale and you're like, should I take off my shoes? They're like, it doesn't matter, hold the bowling ball, put a top hat on, like, who gives a fuck?

• 7:59Drew Afualo?

  It doesn't matter. And then when you get on, they're like, yeah, you're like, well, you don't need to do that.

• 8:03Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 8:04Drew Afualo?

  I don't need the noise. It's, when I go to the doctor now, I don't let them weigh me. You don't have to, because it doesn't matter. Uh, but when I, the last time I went, I was like at the Women's Health Center. So I was like telling her, and she's like, oh, I just want to do vitals, whatever. She did like the blood pressure, all that stuff. And she's like, oh, you can step on the scale. I go, uh, I'd rather not be weighed. And then she goes, well, it's, it's really just for the vit- and I was like, no, I know, I, I'd rather not. Is it, is it imperative? Like, do I have to do it? She's like, no. I was like, okay, perfect. And then she was like, can you just tell me a number? And I was like, any number? I could tell you any number.

• 8:36Speaker 02

  115.

• 8:37Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 8:37Speaker 02

  You said, you said eight.

• 8:39Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. Eight pounds, seven ounces. And I was way heavier than that as a baby. I'll leave it as a baby, I was fucking heavier than that. But I'm so excited to have y'all on the show. Thank you for having us. I'm familiar with your lore, but I would love if every, you could tell everybody else on the show, um, how you guys got started on your pod and also how you met. Obviously, you're a couple. Look at you.

• 8:58Speaker 02

  Look at us.

• 8:58Drew Afualo?

  Look at you. Sorry, we did that like we're pretending to be dating.

• 9:02Speaker 02

  Yes! I swear they are, it's really, it's, yeah. Um, no, we really are. Well, we're both comedians and we've been comedians forever. And then Kendall, this is so, honestly so embarrassing for me to say, but I, it is true. Um, I had a TikTok that went viral.

• 9:17Drew Afualo?

  Period.

• 9:17Speaker 02

  Viral. Viral, big time.

• 9:19Drew Afualo?

  And I was in credit card debt and I said, hello? How are ya?

• 9:24Speaker 04

  Yeah, pretty much, yeah. Kendall had a friend that sent it to her and Kendall was like, who is this? And her friend was like, oh, this used to be my improv teacher. And Kendall said, okay, I'm gonna follow her and DM her every single day. And she did until finally I was like. It was classy. I kept it classy. Well, she sent me so many DMs for absolutely no reason that I was like, I guess I have to have sex with this woman.

• 9:43Drew Afualo?

  I guess.

• 9:44Speaker 04

  I guess. She sent me so many DMs that she's hit the quota. She's earned it. Yeah. That was really hard. She was like, I live in New York. And I was like, okay, goodbye. And she was like, no, no, no, but I'm like, moving to LA. Like, I think we'd really get along. She's like, let's just do one Zoom date. I think you'll really like me. If you don't, no worries. We'll never speak again.

• 10:02Drew Afualo?

  You guys are so gay. It's crazy.

• 10:03Speaker 04

  I gotta get back to this confidence. I'm like, who is that? Whenever you tell this story, I'm like, I must have been drunk. There's no way I wasn't drunk for this.

• 10:12Drew Afualo?

  That doesn't sound like me at all.

• 10:13Speaker 04

  It does not sound like me at all. I'm like, this hot lesbian, so confident. Yes. And then we went on a Zoom date and, well. That's it. The rest is history. I was right. You really liked what you saw. And then I moved to LA and, which I was like, this is for my career, but you know. We're lesbians, so it was also for love. And my dad the whole time was like, it feels like you're just moving for this girl. And I was like, no, it's a really good career move. Dad, you don't get it. You don't get it. And then like a year later, we were engaged. So I was like, um, definitely moved for that. But we then were like, you know, we're busy. This industry is so, we're always working and doing stuff. And we were like, we want to do something where we can spend time together. And so we started a podcast together.

• 10:56Drew Afualo?

  I love that.

• 10:57Speaker 04

  It's been an absolute treat because we also just kind of get to yap at each other. And that's fun.

• 11:02Drew Afualo?

  And I love a good yap.

• 11:03Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 11:03Drew Afualo?

  We love that. Especially doing it as a couple. I love that for y'all.

• 11:06Speaker 04

  Yeah. It feels good.

• 11:07Drew Afualo?

  Do you enjoy doing it together?

• 11:09Speaker 04

  Yeah, most of the time. I would say there's been like two instances where we've had to be like, you know, we're gonna take a pause on filming. We're gonna have a talk. That's why I ask, because I do one with my sister, so I get it. It's like, working together is different. Yes. And it's this hard thing where you're like, we're so, we tell each other every emotion we have as it comes. I feel like we're so, just, I'm like, that's annoying. Please don't do that anymore, like in my everyday life. Or I'll be like, that really pissed me off. And so I feel like on the podcast. It's like, we have to communicate in such a different way, because we're like filming. So if one of us says something the other one doesn't like, we just kind of are not trained in how to do it on camera. So then there's just a constant awkwardness of like, should we pause? Or are you just like looking at, you're looking at me too long and it's making me think I said something bad? So I think we've had to learn how to.

• 11:52Drew Afualo?

  That's good though.

• 11:53Speaker 04

  Be passive aggressive.

• 11:54Drew Afualo?

  It's almost like working in terms of just, you've had to learn, adapt passive aggressiveness.

• 11:58Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 11:58Drew Afualo?

  I know, I don't really have that either, but my sister's very passive. So sometimes, it was funny, when we were filming recently, because we've been working so much lately, that we had to like batch film.

• 12:07Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 12:07Drew Afualo?

  And so, we were filming multiple days in a row, and then it's like, you know, when you film multiple days in a row, you're like, I'm getting sick of talking, and I'm getting sick of sitting in here together. And it was like, I remember we were hearing like a buzzing noise or something in the headphones. And I was trying to talk through it, and then Daisy was like, I'm sorry, I can't, I can't, I can't do it, I can't do it. Because we were both having a really bad day, like emotionally. And then I was like, it's alright, let's just untangle the headphones, let's, let's pause the filming. And when we did, we like paused, reset everything, and I was like, how are we feeling? Should we keep going? She's like, yeah, sorry. I was like, that was gonna make me cry. That's how much I was, that's how far I was making it on the shit. I was like, no, I get it. And I told her, I was, I'm proud of us, we didn't fight, look at us.

• 12:46Speaker 04

  Look at us!

• 12:48Speaker 02

  Well, and it's hard too, because I don't know if y'all get this as much, being sisters, but as a couple, it's like, if I'm sitting with my knees like away from Kendall, fans are like, that's abuse.

• 12:59Speaker 04

  Constant.

• 13:00Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 13:00Speaker 04

  People think any.

• 13:01Drew Afualo?

  That slant fucking shit, they're like, they don't lean towards each other, so.

• 13:04Speaker 02

  Anything, Kendall will be like, I wanna buy a, a new bag, and I'll be like, you're not buying a new bag. And they'll be like, that's financial abuse. That's, Jordan is withholding their money, and it's just like every single thing. So I think that's the hardest thing as a couple, is like, we get along great, everything goes well with us, but you know, the comments are nasty.

• 13:23Speaker 04

  People are crazy. Look up porn, you can look up porn, like, you don't need us, like, they really, they're like, they, they want us like kissing on camera and being like, and it's like, we're not, I can't.

• 13:34Speaker 02

  We're like two adult comedians doing a show, we're not, but, you know what I mean? People want it to be so like, especially lesbians, I'm sorry, our community. Sick, it's not good. And they're always like, you know, they really, I don't know, it's they, they want us to infantilize each other in a way that we don't.

• 13:51Drew Afualo?

  On camera. Yeah, and it's kind of like, like fawn over each other constantly. And that's not, those aren't real relationships.

• 13:57Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 13:58Drew Afualo?

  I was like, you're telling me you guys, you've never beefed with your, your partner ever.

• 14:02Speaker 02

  Right.

• 14:03Drew Afualo?

  Or made fun of them in good jest, like.

• 14:05Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 14:05Drew Afualo?

  Sometimes when we do that too, like me and my man, I'll, I'll like make fun of him or we'll make jokes about each other or whatever. And sometimes they'll say like, I don't know, I just feel like that's rude. Maybe she does that all the time. Girl, what the fuck are you talking about?

• 14:16Speaker 02

  Keeping.

• 14:16Drew Afualo?

  You're like, it was rude, that was the point.

• 14:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:20Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. His, my message was received. I was trying it for it to be rude.

• 14:23Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 14:24Drew Afualo?

  And it was funny.

• 14:25Speaker 04

  And then they're obsessed with these couples that are so sweet to each other, but they have prank channels. I said,

• 14:29Drew Afualo?

  I said, honey.

• 14:31Speaker 02

  There's not, what's going on behind closed doors? You don't even want to know.

• 14:34Drew Afualo?

  We were, I'll tell you who it is after, but when we were at Coachella day one, we were driving on the little golf cart thing. We were going to a stage. And we saw a famous couple walking back there, but they weren't on the carts. They were walking because they were fucking fighting.

• 14:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:48Drew Afualo?

  And then we were like, we drove past them. I heard them fighting. And then we drove past them and I was like, man, been there. I said, you gotta get your fight out before Coachella. I learned that the hard way. Yeah. Day before you gotta fight with your spouse. You gotta beef, get it out.

• 15:01Speaker 02

  Big fight, knock down, drag out.

• 15:03Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. Big, big, big fight that lasts till you get to the house, then it ends because then you're all ready to part.

• 15:07Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 15:08Drew Afualo?

  And it's funny because my man and I did fight the day before Coachella started.

• 15:11Speaker 02

  Good.

• 15:11Drew Afualo?

  But when we were day one, when we were watching, I forget who we were watching. I think we were watching Missy Elliott or someone. And we were standing there and I was like, and we were like, having a good time. And I looked, I was like, man, good thing we fought yesterday, huh?

• 15:24Drew Afualo?

  He's like, yeah, got it out the way. I said, up top, hit me.

• 15:28Speaker 02

  I'm just like, if you're not fighting as a couple, I'm like, just both of you not have opinions?

• 15:31Drew Afualo?

  I know.

• 15:32Speaker 02

  Even Kendall and I have almost the same opinion on everything and we still will fight about it.

• 15:35Drew Afualo?

  Right.

• 15:36Speaker 02

  It feels good. You gotta just like get, you know,

• 15:38Speaker 04

  It's healthy.

• 15:39Speaker 02

  You live together.

• 15:39Drew Afualo?

  That's why I was like, that's just like cohabiting. Like you'll, you're gonna eventually butt heads on something.

• 15:44Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 15:45Drew Afualo?

  And, and beef about something.

• 15:46Speaker 04

  Also, we get bored. Like we had a roommate one time who was like, every time I hear you guys fighting, it's about a non-existent problem. That's like, we come up with fake, we're like, okay, if we had a 13 year old and she came to us and she said, I want to get married, what would you do? And then two hours later, we're literally arguing.

• 16:02Speaker 02

  Like, we're not handling it that way. We're not handling it that way.

• 16:05Drew Afualo?

  They're all hypotheticals. Fake, literally just a fake.

• 16:08Speaker 04

  It's just foreplay for us.

• 16:10Drew Afualo?

  Enemies to lovers kind of thing.

• 16:12Speaker 02

  I'm also like, what, you don't argue with your family ever? Kendall's my family.

• 16:16Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 16:17Speaker 02

  It's normal.

• 16:18Drew Afualo?

  That's so funny. One time I asked my man, I was like, if I had shoulders like you, would you still love me? And he said, no. And we got into a fight. And we fought about it for like an hour.

• 16:26Speaker 02

  Because what?

• 16:27Drew Afualo?

  That's fucked up. Don't worry, we love you. I was like, you're so, you're just so attracted to my small, dainty, worldly shoulders. You wouldn't like me if I had big man shoulders. That's fucked up. That's so fucked up of you. And I asked him a question once. I was like, what if I had feet the same size as you? Same thing, fought about it too.

• 16:44Speaker 02

  He wouldn't love you if you had feet the same size?

• 16:47Drew Afualo?

  If I had the same size foot as him.

• 16:48Speaker 02

  Yeah, what size is that?

• 16:49Drew Afualo?

  A thirteen.

• 16:50Speaker 02

  Come on, who cares?

• 16:51Drew Afualo?

  Which in men's, which would be, I think, a fifteen in women's. But I was like, if I had those feet, you wouldn't love me? And he was like, he didn't even say no. He just hesitated. And I was like, that's fucked up.

• 16:59Speaker 04

  But what size shoe do you have currently?

• 17:01Drew Afualo?

  I'm a nine and a half.

• 17:03Speaker 04

  Okay, cause I'm like, we're tens.

• 17:04Speaker 02

  We're tens, so to me, I'm like, it's getting too close. I think what's so messed up about that one is you're like, I'm almost there.

• 17:11Drew Afualo?

  That means I'm skipping a jump.

• 17:14Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 17:15Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. Well, so you guys are both in the comedy space. Yeah. How long have y'all been doing standup for?

• 17:20Speaker 02

  A million years, it feels like. I mean, I'm older than Kendall, but I've been a professional comedian now probably for ten years. And, um, what, you know, I went to college for acting and improv has been my big thing. Um, I toured with the Upright Citizens Brigade for many years. That was my first job out of college. But now we do a bunch of different, a bunch of different, that's the thing about this industry is like, you can't just do one thing.

• 17:43Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 17:44Speaker 02

  Anymore. It's like, you know, you have to like. Yes, you have to like write and act and direct and host and like, it's just, you know.

• 17:52Speaker 04

  Which honestly, isn't even just this industry now. I feel more bad for people who are like realtors. And then you see them having to be like, hey guys, happy Tuesday. And I'm like, oh lord, these poor people.

• 18:03Drew Afualo?

  I know they're working social media into like everything now. Even like, um, artists, when they sing, they're like, you need to get on TikTok and promote your songs. When I see them making TikTok sometimes, I'm like, oh, I get it. It's like, there's no dignity in it. Trust me, I know. It's my job too.

• 18:17Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 18:18Drew Afualo?

  I was like, trust me, I can't, it's like, it feels like you're whoring yourself out, which you are.

• 18:22Speaker 02

  You are.

• 18:23Drew Afualo?

  But like, hey, you know what it is?

• 18:26Speaker 02

  But it really is every single industry now. You know what I mean? Like, I do a lot of stuff in the food space too. And it's like, I mean, restaurants are like. Come down here and eat her sandwich, we'll suck your dick. It's like on TikTok and you can't not.

• 18:38Speaker 04

  Well, even poor Jordan had to get a foot surgery last year.

• 18:41Speaker 02

  Oh, my god.

• 18:41Speaker 04

  Well, first of all, it didn't go well. That's what I'll tell you.

• 18:43Speaker 02

  I was botched.

• 18:44Speaker 04

  And then after they go.

• 18:45Drew Afualo?

  You were botched?

• 18:45Speaker 02

  I was botched.

• 18:46Speaker 04

  Botched. And they were like, well, we were like, who is this surgeon? And they're like, well, she's a famous surgeon. We were like, that shouldn't exist.

• 18:54Speaker 02

  I found out.

• 18:55Speaker 04

  She's a TikTok surgeon.

• 18:56Speaker 02

  So one of the surgeons in the orthopedic doctor's office I was going to.

• 19:01Speaker 04

  Right.

• 19:02Speaker 02

  Apparently, not my doctor, but another one in the office. Apparently, they get such good reviews because one of the doctors in the office doesn't even do doctoring or surgery anymore. She just is a TikTok doctor. So she makes videos talking about being a TikTok doctor. And that's why they have such good surgery. And then that's how I got botched.

• 19:21Drew Afualo?

  So you fell for the propaganda that they were pushing.

• 19:25Speaker 02

  Well, I didn't even know. I was just like, oh, my god. Five stars on Yelp at a doctor's office, 8,000 reviews.

• 19:30Drew Afualo?

  In turn, they're rating her TikToks and not the surgeries.

• 19:33Speaker 02

  Yes, but how do you know? Like with a doctor, I'm like, how do you know? And they're all evil.

• 19:39Speaker 04

  They're all, it's really bad.

• 19:41Drew Afualo?

  That's like, well, speaking of, we talked about it right before we started the pit. Have you guys watched it?

• 19:46Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 19:46Drew Afualo?

  It's so good. I'm almost done with season one.

• 19:48Speaker 02

  Did you say, mm hmm?

• 19:49Speaker 04

  I watched, I was next to the.

• 19:51Speaker 02

  No, you didn't.

• 19:51Speaker 04

  I was in the room. I've never watched a TV show. Jordan watches TV and I'm like walking around the house, kind of taking in.

• 19:57Drew Afualo?

  You're just.

• 19:58Speaker 04

  Little moments.

• 19:58Drew Afualo?

  Floating about.

• 19:59Speaker 02

  Yes. This is what's gonna happen, though, is you're like, you guys watch them, we're like, mm hmm. And then you're gonna ask a question and Kendall's gonna panic.

• 20:05Speaker 04

  That's how I'm really bad.

• 20:07Drew Afualo?

  You're right, call her out now.

• 20:08Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 20:09Speaker 04

  Sorry. A big defense mechanism of telling people I know. They'll be like, oh, you know, the actor. I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 20:15Drew Afualo?

  You know what's funny? I do that with movies. I've told people, I'm like, yeah, I think I've seen it. Or I've seen parts of it. When I say that, I mean, like, I generally understand the plot, I think. And I got it.

• 20:27Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 20:27Drew Afualo?

  Or I've watched it on TikTok. Like, I've watched a couple of scenes on TikTok.

• 20:30Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 20:30Drew Afualo?

  And then I go, yeah, I've seen it. I haven't. I just, I feel like I got the gist.

• 20:33Speaker 02

  Right.

• 20:34Drew Afualo?

  Which is like how I felt about, it's so funny, because I'm like, yeah, no, I have seen Pride and Prejudice. Like, once on my show with Dave, I was like, describing the plots of movies so she could guess them. And so I was describing Pride and Prejudice as if I've seen it. I haven't.

• 20:48Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 20:49Drew Afualo?

  I thought I had. And by that, I mean, I thought I understood it based off the TikToks I've seen.

• 20:53Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:54Drew Afualo?

  And so I said with the most conviction in the world that like, he gets pneumonia in the rain and dies. And then everyone in the comments was like, that's not what happens in Pride and Prejudice. I go, well, what movie am I talking about? I don't know, girl.

• 21:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 21:07Drew Afualo?

  They're like, they're like, I don't know what you're talking about. I'm like, oh. But the whole time I was like, I thought I had seen it. I've never seen that movie.

• 21:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, but that's okay. You're fine.

• 21:15Drew Afualo?

  It's okay. I lie about stuff like that all the time. I'm like, when they say, have you seen Goodfellas? Yep.

• 21:19Speaker 02

  Yep. Because everyone also always has to, you never?

• 21:24Drew Afualo?

  There's just so much.

• 21:24Speaker 02

  I don't want to go through this, right. I don't want to do this song and dance with you where I'm like, yeah, if you can believe it, I've never seen. And so it is, we have to watch it together. I'm like, when are we gonna watch that together? No, I met you two minutes ago. I'm not gonna watch Labyrinth with you, but thank you.

• 21:39Drew Afualo?

  You know what's funny? I have seen Labyrinth.

• 21:41Speaker 02

  I haven't.

• 21:41Drew Afualo?

  That one, I've seen it on BHS.

• 21:43Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 21:43Drew Afualo?

  Okay.

• 21:43Speaker 02

  It's one of my favorite movies.

• 21:44Drew Afualo?

  And I used to be really afraid of it when I was a kid.

• 21:46Speaker 02

  Really?

• 21:46Drew Afualo?

  David Bowie used to scare me.

• 21:47Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 21:48Drew Afualo?

  He used to scare me, but maybe it was just the beauty was too much for me to behold.

• 21:51Speaker 02

  Yeah. It's, I mean, that movie's a lot. Those movies from that time are very haunting.

• 21:56Drew Afualo?

  They're very, they're very creepy.

• 21:58Speaker 02

  Yeah, I feel like those movies give a vibe of, they're like, we'll just kill a kid. You know what I mean? Like, I mean, in Labyrinth, it's like, they just kidnap a baby.

• 22:04Drew Afualo?

  They should just kill someone.

• 22:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 22:05Drew Afualo?

  Maybe a child.

• 22:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, but like, children's movies now don't give that off. Children's movies now are like, uh, two pigeons eat a meatball together. It's like, fine. Do you know what I mean? But like, from that time, from the nineties, when we were growing up.

• 22:18Drew Afualo?

  Creepy.

• 22:19Speaker 02

  Scary.

• 22:19Drew Afualo?

  No, for real. Well, back to the pit really quickly.

• 22:22Speaker 02

  I've seen all of it. Kendall's been around it.

• 22:25Drew Afualo?

  She has the general gist.

• 22:26Speaker 02

  I'm in, I'm, yeah.

• 22:27Drew Afualo?

  Uh, I love it. I think it's so fun.

• 22:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 22:30Drew Afualo?

  I, I, I'm a fan of medical shows. Do you guys like medical shows?

• 22:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 22:33Drew Afualo?

  I love them. And I think part of it is like me being a know-it-all as a Virgo, because I like to hear more things to internalize them as if I'm a doctor.

• 22:41Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 22:41Drew Afualo?

  So I'll like, I'll get all that info. And then if someone brings something up that I've seen on the show, I'm like, well, you know, and I list the.

• 22:47Speaker 02

  You're like, CT scans.

• 22:48Drew Afualo?

  Or actually.

• 22:49Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 22:49Drew Afualo?

  BP vitals, all of those things. But I was gonna say, in that show, you know how that, when they're doing the emergency surgeries, whatever, they're like, razzing each other?

• 22:58Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 22:58Drew Afualo?

  When I was watching it with my man the other day, I was like. I'll tell you what I don't want to hear if my neck's been crushed is banter. Yeah, I don't want to hear, I don't want to hear you chiding against each other and my throat's open. Like, I don't want to hear that shit.

• 23:10Speaker 02

  Absolutely.

• 23:11Drew Afualo?

  Like, the way that they're alive and they're like, oh, take me to dinner first. Hey bitch, um, there's a stoma in my throat.

• 23:18Speaker 02

  Hey, let's focus up.

• 23:20Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 23:20Speaker 02

  Maybe let's do a quiet moment.

• 23:23Drew Afualo?

  Let's do, let's say doctor things because you're doctors.

• 23:26Speaker 02

  Yes, and they could even be fake.

• 23:27Drew Afualo?

  I know.

• 23:28Speaker 04

  Because you couldn't do that in any other emergency. Imagine if you're firefighters, you're like being dragged out of the house and they're bantering back and forth.

• 23:36Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, and they're like, not me saving someone.

• 23:40Drew Afualo?

  Each other.

• 23:41Speaker 04

  Not me saving.

• 23:45Speaker 02

  That's why none of them have jobs. They can't, they can't.

• 23:50Drew Afualo?

  So hard for them to get a job, too much banter.

• 23:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:52Drew Afualo?

  Too much banter on the clock.

• 23:53Speaker 02

  Truly.

• 23:54Drew Afualo?

  I saw, um, once I saw, you know, remember the show, Whose Line Is It Anyways? Iconic show. If you're an improv genius, I would have loved for you to go on that show. That would have been crazy.

• 24:03Speaker 02

  What if my dream, my favorite TV show growing up and my initial celebrity crush, Wayne Brady? Wayne, if you're out there.

• 24:10Drew Afualo?

  All the pieces were there, weren't they?

• 24:12Speaker 02

  I'm gay now, but I'd love to talk to you still.

• 24:13Drew Afualo?

  I think he is too.

• 24:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, I think he maybe is bisexual.

• 24:18Speaker 04

  Wow.

• 24:19Drew Afualo?

  I saw a Whose Line Is It Anyways episode where they were saying things you never want to hear your pilot say. And one of them said, did you see the jugs on the girl in row D? I laughed till I had tears going down my face because I was thinking, can you imagine hearing your pilot objectify someone? Get off the plane, I don't want you flying it.

• 24:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 24:41Drew Afualo?

  I don't want you talking about titties and you're sitting in the cockpit.

• 24:43Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 24:44Drew Afualo?

  Oh my god, you're in charge of my life? I should be talking about the woman's titties in row D. Not you, you're at work.

• 24:52Speaker 04

  See, I think it'd make me have the opposite. I think I'd feel safer because I think I, I think men, it's like, I think the only way they'll care. Like, I think me just being there, if I was like, I'm the next president, like, I'm gonna be the person who cures cancer. He'd be like, okay, I don't care. But the second I have like huge titties, he'd be like, I'm not letting this plane go down.

• 25:11Drew Afualo?

  We can't go down.

• 25:12Speaker 02

  We gotta get these row D titties to Florida, stack.

• 25:16Speaker 02

  Like they're transporting a heart.

• 25:18Drew Afualo?

  A heart, an organ donor.

• 25:20Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 25:21Drew Afualo?

  That pilot, Sully. Imagine it was Sully.

• 25:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 25:24Speaker 04

  What do I always say?

• 25:26Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 25:27Speaker 04

  I always say I need to see Sully.

• 25:29Speaker 02

  Oh, you do say that.

• 25:30Speaker 04

  I actually literally do. I'm always like, we gotta watch Sully, and I never have.

• 25:34Speaker 02

  She'll, I'll be like in the shower, she'll come in, she'll like peek her head around the curtain, she'll be like, we have to watch Sully. We have never seen that.

• 25:40Speaker 04

  It runs right up my alley.

• 25:41Speaker 02

  Yeah, I guess.

• 25:42Speaker 04

  I don't know, just like a plane crash, I'm addicted. I love that.

• 25:47Drew Afualo?

  Something about it.

• 25:47Speaker 04

  Something about it. I don't have flight anxiety, because I think I'm always kinda like fingers crossing it, for like the drama.

• 25:53Drew Afualo?

  Well, I don't want you on my plane.

• 25:54Speaker 02

  No. No, absolutely not.

• 25:57Drew Afualo?

  It's, you know, we were, I was flying from, I think it was Pennsylvania, Belafonte, Pennsylvania.

• 26:03Speaker 02

  Uh oh.

• 26:04Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, it's as terrible as it sounds.

• 26:06Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 26:06Drew Afualo?

  And I flew, I was flying out of there to like somewhere else, and then going back to LA. And when we left, we were on the tiniest little fucking plane, because it's like just a short, like one hour flight. When it was going up and coming down, it was shaking, it felt like this. It didn't feel like turbulence. It felt like someone was grabbing it and going like this. And I really, I'd never felt like, oh, this plane might crash, but I was so fucking tired and so high off my ass that I was like, well, if it goes down, it goes down. Like, I literally just made peace with it in my head, I was like.

• 26:40Speaker 04

  I have found I have that exact response to near-death experiences, like before anyone's even, we could be 80 steps from dying, there could be so many things we could do, and I am immediately like, it, I turned to you and I'm like, it's okay.

• 26:53Drew Afualo?

  Let me go.

• 26:54Speaker 02

  We were on a plane recently, where there was, all of a sudden, we like got up in the air, the pilot had already warned us there was gonna be horrible turbulence on the flight. We get up in the air, a sound starts when we're up in the air that sounds like air from outside coming into the plane.

• 27:08Drew Afualo?

  And this was right after that story of the door flying off?

• 27:10Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, this was right after.

• 27:11Drew Afualo?

  So we were all geared up for the door to fly off.

• 27:13Speaker 02

  Lots of bad things had happened on planes, and it was so loud, and everyone around us is like kinda scared and pressing the like call button to get the flight attendant to come over. Finally, the flight attendant comes over, she's like, what? She hears the noise and she goes, oh no, and runs to the front of the plane.

• 27:27Drew Afualo?

  Well, now I'm scared.

• 27:28Speaker 02

  So we're all scared, the guy behind us is like praying, we're all whatever. I'm like, okay, Kendall, put your stuff away, make sure the exit is clear in case we have to get up and get out, like, get whatever. Kendall's like, you know what? I'm just gonna finish this chapter of my book in case this is it.

• 27:45Speaker 04

  I was in the middle of a sex scene. It was smutty. I was like, this is how I die.

• 27:49Speaker 02

  No way.

• 27:50Speaker 04

  What are we doing? Putting our, the plane's crashing, we're putting our, our stuff underneath our seat? It's done.

• 27:56Speaker 02

  No.

• 27:57Speaker 04

  That's not gonna do anything.

• 27:58Drew Afualo?

  Girl, no, I'm finishing this fucking book. I'm finishing this scene.

• 28:01Speaker 02

  Absolutely not. I'm not putting your earmask on.

• 28:05Drew Afualo?

  Just kill me.

• 28:06Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 28:07Drew Afualo?

  You a smutty book fan?

• 28:08Speaker 04

  Big, big fan. It's all, it's actually really embarrassing because I feel like I'm always like, I'm a reader. And it's like, bitch, you're on Wattpad, basically. Like, the stuff they're publishing now, it's not even literature. And I'm acting like I'm some intellectual, but I do love it.

• 28:25Speaker 02

  Well, Kendall's always like, what does this word mean? I look at it, I'm like, that's not a word, that's a typo. That's why you can't read it. That's a fake book. This book wasn't even edited.

• 28:32Speaker 04

  Because they're doing that now. They're just not even editing. They'll like go through, I've heard less rounds of editors because they're like, these bitches don't care. They can hardly read. This is their first book.

• 28:43Drew Afualo?

  And it's working on me, you know?

• 28:44Speaker 04

  Exactly.

• 28:45Drew Afualo?

  I've read, I've read a few recently where I found out after that she didn't have an editor at all, the author. And I said, well, I could tell because there were quite a few typos, but it's like a printed book. It's, it's, it's a published book. It was on my Kindle.

• 28:57Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 28:58Drew Afualo?

  So I was, I had to read the sentence like four times and I was like, interesting.

• 29:02Speaker 02

  You're like, wait, does supple have three Ps in it?

• 29:05Drew Afualo?

  Souple?

• 29:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 29:07Drew Afualo?

  It's changing the pronunciation of it.

• 29:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 29:10Drew Afualo?

  Okay, so you said you're, you love improv. That was like, that's your, your bread and butter.

• 29:15Speaker 04

  Sure. You love it. Come on, Jordan. You do love it.

• 29:19Speaker 02

  It's maybe one of the most embarrassing things you can say, but I do.

• 29:21Drew Afualo?

  I don't find that embarrassing at all.

• 29:22Speaker 02

  That's so nice.

• 29:23Drew Afualo?

  And I think it's because a lot of my friends are comics too. So like Caleb, Heron, obviously, like Sabrina Brier, they both told me that they, they're very proud of improv. But Sabrina was telling me, she goes, yeah, when me and Caleb like joke about it, we both are like, oh God, that's so dorky, huh? Because they were both in their improv groups in college and then became presidents of them and then obviously did it after. And then they said, then at, at some point they'll be quiet and they're like, God, I'm so proud of it though. It's just like such a, an accomplishment. I love improv.

• 29:51Speaker 02

  That's so nice.

• 29:52Drew Afualo?

  I think improv is so fun. And I love, and I both think you're both so hilarious. So I love to know about standup. Like, how's the journey with standup been?

• 30:00Speaker 04

  Well, I don't do as much stand up, but I do a lot of like, character stand up. So I'll go as like, I do mostly like, character acting. So I'll go and do a stand up set, but like, as a character.

• 30:08Drew Afualo?

  Love.

• 30:09Speaker 04

  Um, but Jordan literally can just improvise, um, stand up, which I think is absolutely insane.

• 30:14Drew Afualo?

  That's so sick.

• 30:15Speaker 04

  But I, the first time I saw Jordan do stand up, because when you start dating someone who's a comic, I think there is like, this really scary moment of like, the first time you watch them do it. And you're like, if you're really bad, like, I can't.

• 30:28Drew Afualo?

  Can't control the ick.

• 30:29Speaker 04

  Do that. Like, I cannot date a bad stand up comedian.

• 30:33Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 30:33Speaker 04

  And even know how it matter, I'm so in love with you. I mean, at this point, we were, because it was during the pandemic. So there wasn't, we met during the pandemic. So there wasn't a ton of live performance. So it's like, two years in. And I was like, I have to leave them because they're just like, horrible at stand up. It'd be so bad. But we went, my dad, so my dad passed away a couple of years ago, and his last year, he was like, I'm gonna get really into stand up. And he like, called our local.

• 30:54Drew Afualo?

  What really happened is that Kendall started to become a famous comedian, and then he literally got jealous. And he was like, and I too will be a famous comedian.

• 31:02Speaker 04

  He also started a TikTok account. There was, he started a YouTube channel. There was a couple.

• 31:05Drew Afualo?

  He said Nepo baby in reverse.

• 31:06Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 31:07Drew Afualo?

  Yes.

• 31:08Speaker 04

  And so he literally called our, I'm from a very small town. He called the bar. He was like, put a ramp in. Put a ramp on the sta, they're like, we don't have a stage, so also, I guess, put a stage in.

• 31:18Drew Afualo?

  And get ready to laugh your ass off.

• 31:22Speaker 04

  And I, we like, flew down to see him. We were like, alright, what is, and I was terrified. I was like, what is he, because you know how dads are. I'm like, you've never said a single sentence that's appropriate. Yeah. Like, you, everything you say, I have to go, dad, you can't say that.

• 31:35Drew Afualo?

  Sometimes it's a little offensive.

• 31:36Speaker 04

  Exactly. And I was like, what is he gonna do? We fly down there, and he, the whole time, to Jordan is like, get up there, do something, do, do, go up there after me in honor of me. And you know, when someone's dying, you're like, you gotta say yes to so much crap.

• 31:51Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 31:51Speaker 04

  You're like, okay, sure. And so Jordan went up, and I was like, you do not have to do this. And it was so funny. I think he was jealous, because you were a little funnier than him. He was like, alright, enough.

• 32:02Drew Afualo?

  A little. He was funny.

• 32:04Speaker 04

  He was funny.

• 32:04Drew Afualo?

  He starts heckling you.

• 32:05Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 32:06Drew Afualo?

  He's a very funny man.

• 32:08Speaker 04

  Yeah. Yeah.

• 32:10Drew Afualo?

  That's so awesome.

• 32:11Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 32:11Speaker 02

  And I do stand up, did stand up for a long time, but I think the thing with stand up is you kind of have to decide early in your comedy career, like, do I want to be a professional stand up comedian?

• 32:21Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 32:21Speaker 02

  And go on the road as a stand up comedian, which historically is hell on earth, especially if you're not a man. It's like, you know what I mean?

• 32:30Speaker 04

  Well, that's who you're also spending all your time with. It's like, that's why I could not, and there's nothing like transporting back to the 50s, which is anytime you're backstage at a stand up show. I literally have had men come up to me, it's like I'm in Miss Maisel, and they're like, are you here to sing, pretty lady? I'm like, why are you dressed like you're in The Sopranos? And what is going on?

• 32:50Drew Afualo?

  Sweet.

• 32:51Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 32:52Drew Afualo?

  That is how it is backstage at any stand up show, no matter where you're at. It is so bizarre.

• 32:56Speaker 04

  We're wearing the same outfit. Yes.

• 32:58Speaker 02

  So fuck. Absolutely, yeah. So it's a weird vibe. It's like, I didn't really want to be around those people specifically.

• 33:04Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 33:04Speaker 02

  So I was like, okay, I'm not gonna like, go out on a lifelong career of doing stand up on the road. Especially because I also had other interests, and like, I went to school for acting, and so did Kendall, and so we also do acting. But once again, it's like nowadays you have to do literally everything.

• 33:20Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 33:20Speaker 02

  You know?

• 33:20Drew Afualo?

  You have to dip your toe in all of it. Thankfully, both of you are very talented at all of it.

• 33:24Speaker 04

  Oh, my goodness.

• 33:25Drew Afualo?

  How's, how's acting been? I'm, I'm dipping my toe in acting right now, I'm getting started.

• 33:29Speaker 04

  Oh, my god.

• 33:29Drew Afualo?

  So I'm always asking my fellow actor friends for tips on like self tapes and auditions and stuff.

• 33:35Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 33:35Drew Afualo?

  You guys, how, how's that been for y'all? Has it changed since the COVID? I, I know a lot of my actor friends have said it's changed drastically since COVID.

• 33:42Speaker 04

  Well, I think the biggest thing that's changed is, at first, now you do so many self tapes, so there's not as much in person auditions, which I think at first, like, oh, my god, that's incredible. It's so nice.

• 33:50Speaker 02

  I don't have to drive to Santa Monica.

• 33:52Speaker 04

  Yes. That's amazing. But now it's gone in the other direction where it's like, they expect so much from every audition.

• 33:58Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 33:58Speaker 04

  So like, I had an, I had an audition for General Hospital last year.

• 34:02Drew Afualo?

  Oh, dude.

• 34:02Speaker 04

  And they were like, we want her dressed as the Virgin Mary, which, what does that mean? I don't have that costume available, and it's not a common costume that people have. They want me dressed as the Virgin Mary, so I put a tablecloth over my head. And then I, they were like, we want her to show up at the door, and we want her to give birth, dressed as the Virgin Mary. This is a thing that you would never have been asked to do.

• 34:25Drew Afualo?

  What are you talking about?

• 34:26Speaker 04

  Right. And the fact that this footage, I didn't get the part, if you can believe it. It was so terrible. And I know this footage is somewhere and it's so devastating. It was the worst thing anyone's ever seen. And I think they ask so much more of you now because like, well, you're at home. So like, instead of just like doing an audition for a pizza company, they're like, can you dress as a pizza pizza?

• 34:48Speaker 04

  No. But also, yes, I'll do anything, I guess.

• 34:51Drew Afualo?

  What if you sit in it and they're like, damn, she really did it?

• 34:54Speaker 02

  She really fucking did it. I just want you to make like a short film at home now, which is not what an audition is.

• 34:59Drew Afualo?

  No shit.

• 35:00Speaker 02

  Yeah. And I think the hardest thing about acting is, well, I guess not the hardest thing about acting, but I think the most complicated thing about acting in this day and age is you're going to get nine million pieces of advice when it comes to auditioning. And you just have to do what feels right to you. Because there are people that are like, dress for the part in the audition because it will help them visualize you in that part. But then there are people that are like, do not dress as the part. It gives freak vibes. Or it makes them see you in a way that maybe that's not how they pictured the character in their mind. Don't do it with props because it makes it seem too solidified. Sometimes they'll even tell you like, have the line, they always say, don't, you don't have to memorize lines. You don't have to memorize lines. You do. You do have to memorize lines because you cannot look at the piece of paper, but sometimes they'll tell you to hold the piece of paper.

• 35:43Speaker 02

  So it gives off the vibe that it's still like a work in progress.

• 35:49Speaker 04

  They're just making stuff up. Like, that's the reality. It's like, it's all made up and you really just have to be like, I'm not listening. I think I also recently have been like, oh, people are trying to like, you know, when you're in a Zoom meeting and you're like, this is just so these people can be like, look, I had a Zoom meeting, like to their boss. That's like all the acting, like people, they want something to say to you so that you're like, you know, something.

• 36:12Drew Afualo?

  Right.

• 36:12Speaker 04

  And so you can't like take everything to heart.

• 36:14Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, it's truly so subjective in like so many ways. And that's, that does make me feel a little bit better about it. Cause I, I've, a lot of my actor friends who have said the same thing, like they're like, it's really so subjective. And like Sabrina Breyer told me, because she's written on shows a lot too. And she was like, I've been in rooms with showrunners who like, they'll watch the first two seconds and they'll be like, no, because it just, that person doesn't look like what they thought. So it's like, it's so subjective. And then sometimes. I watch movies that come out now and I'm like, I could do that.

• 36:44Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 36:45Drew Afualo?

  Well, that, that is the worst part of this whole industry. It's like, first of all, I haven't even gotten auditioned. It's not even, oh, I didn't get that. They were like, we don't need to hear.

• 36:53Speaker 02

  No shit, me too.

• 36:54Drew Afualo?

  And you see this commercial that's just, you're like, why?

• 36:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 36:58Drew Afualo?

  Couldn't I do that?

• 36:58Speaker 02

  Why was I not allowed to audition for Husky Girl with Bangs in Trident commercial? I wasn't even good enough to be seen for that? I'm classically trained. I have a BFA from NYU. I wasn't allowed to audition for Husky Girl with Bangs in Trident commercial? Like, it feels very crazy.

• 37:13Drew Afualo?

  And we have friends now who will, they'll see a casting that they're not invited to do. And for example, it'll be like, we want a Jordan Myrick type, but Jordan's not been asked to audition.

• 37:22Speaker 02

  I was not asked to audition. I was not called in for the audition.

• 37:25Drew Afualo?

  Crazy.

• 37:25Speaker 02

  But they're looking for someone that does. And it's like, so yeah, it's really warped and weird and.

• 37:29Drew Afualo?

  It's like, all of this without you.

• 37:32Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 37:32Drew Afualo?

  Put it on someone else.

• 37:33Speaker 02

  Really hurtful. Really hurtful. Yeah.

• 37:36Drew Afualo?

  And then they always cast a model.

• 37:38Speaker 02

  It's always a model. It's always a model.

• 37:41Drew Afualo?

  Dude, and you know what? I was saying this the other day. I was like, sometimes I think it's okay if we just, as a society, as a collective, we're like, I like this person because they're hot.

• 37:51Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 37:52Drew Afualo?

  I think that's okay.

• 37:53Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 37:53Drew Afualo?

  There are many actors who are that.

• 37:55Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 37:56Drew Afualo?

  I'll, I'll name one. No, I'm not even gonna name one. Just in case they come, just in case they come. Just in case, because I'm trying to get them on the show.

• 38:02Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 38:03Drew Afualo?

  But like, there are some people that I think are like, they're, they're good. Like, yes, can you memorize lines? Can you do somewhat emotion short? Uh, but, uh, 99% of it is looks, right? And it's like, you're just nice to look at.

• 38:16Speaker 02

  Yeah. I have a guess who this is, so after I'll ask.

• 38:18Drew Afualo?

  What's wrong with that? Like, there's nothing wrong with that. But what I don't like is hearing like, oh, this is the, the new actor of the generation. I disagree.

• 38:26Speaker 02

  Right.

• 38:27Drew Afualo?

  I think you think they're hot. I think they're, they're beautiful too. It's okay.

• 38:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 38:30Drew Afualo?

  We can say it.

• 38:31Speaker 02

  I also think that something that's so hard is everybody on the internet is an expert on anything. So I, I, you hear these people who have never left their home be like, well, they're a good actor because of X, Y, Z. Most of what acting that you're seeing is, is directing, directors, you know what I mean?

• 38:50Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, that's true.

• 38:50Speaker 02

  So a big part of like being a good actor in terms of an actor as a profession is being able to take direction. And if your director is directing you poorly or telling you to make these weird choices. When you're just like a lower level actor who's not like Toni Collette, you have to just be like, oh, you want me to do this thing that's bad? Okay, I need money, like you have to just do it.

• 39:11Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, you can't be like, no, I don't want to, because you're not Toni Collette.

• 39:14Speaker 02

  Because then you won't work again.

• 39:15Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, then you'll get fired and they'll tell other people.

• 39:18Speaker 02

  Yes, and that's why you see these actors, you're like, well, wait, she was so good in this movie, but so bad in this movie. I'm like, yeah, it's directing, they're just doing their job. And sometimes actors get to sync up with these directors that are brilliant and unbelievable and incredible. And it's a collaborative experience and it's awesome. And then sometimes you just work with a director that's like not good and you're making a movie that's maybe not good. And that's okay too, it's your job. It's not like a moral failing to.

• 39:43Drew Afualo?

  I agree.

• 39:44Speaker 02

  You know what I mean to like sometimes have better performances than others.

• 39:47Drew Afualo?

  Well, yeah, absolutely. And then there's, and I think a good indicator of that too is the fact that it is art, so it is subjective. So like what's one person's trash is another person's treasure. And there are many Oscar films that I watched that I was like, I, I don't get what everyone's talking about. I don't get what everyone's talking about. And I, and I think to myself, maybe I'm just the dumbest bitch alive. I don't know, maybe I just don't understand art.

• 40:08Speaker 02

  No.

• 40:09Drew Afualo?

  But there are some movies I watch where I, like especially this last Oscars, I watched a lot of them and I never do. But when I did, I was like, I don't understand what everyone's talking about. Wicked, yeah, loved that one.

• 40:20Speaker 04

  But that's entertainment. That's what sometimes I'm like, are we forgetting this is entertainment? Can we please, I had an acting teacher in college that I loved because she would always be like, I'm bored, slap each other. Yeah, I'm bored, make out. Like, and I'm like, yes! That's what I wanna see. First of all, if you're so good at making movies, why is it four and a half hours?

• 40:39Drew Afualo?

  No shit.

• 40:40Speaker 04

  Why is it three? It should be an hour and ten.

• 40:41Drew Afualo?

  Oh, girl, why am I? Why is it taking up a quarter of my day? I should not be in this theater for that long.

• 40:46Speaker 04

  That's why I'm like, okay, Minecraft movie, that's cinema, cuz they knew how to cut down a script.

• 40:49Drew Afualo?

  Listen, hour forty. Listen, and I, I wanna watch the Minecraft movie. They've sold me. I've seen a lot of the TikToks on it. I said, you know what? Maybe.

• 40:59Speaker 04

  A hundred percent.

• 40:59Drew Afualo?

  And it's funny cuz I'm like, it's, the Oscar movies too, sometimes I don't understand, like, I'm like, I don't get what the fuck everyone's talking about. And some of them, I don't even make it all the way through cuz I get so fucking bored. I quit. And I was like, but you know, I don't see Puss in Boots in the, being nominated for an Oscar.

• 41:14Speaker 04

  Wasn't it though? Wasn't it nominated for best?

• 41:17Drew Afualo?

  Puss in Boots, The Last Wish, the most recent one.

• 41:19Speaker 04

  But it should have been.

• 41:20Drew Afualo?

  Nominated for animated, but they don't get nominated.

• 41:23Speaker 04

  But it should have been nominated for best film. And that is true. I saw the movie and we, first of all, I had to be shushed cuz I was cockling to them. When she was upside down on the piano, I could not believe. So funny. But I also am like, we see this all the time. It's like comedy's not really like, ever taken seriously, obviously. I'm like, Spy with Melissa McCarthy, have you seen?

• 41:45Drew Afualo?

  I love that fucking movie.

• 41:46Speaker 04

  We watch it every night before bed and that is mental illness.

• 41:48Drew Afualo?

  Spy is the heat is one of my other favorite movies ever. And I'm so glad you guys have seen it cuz I bring that movie up to everybody and so many people haven't seen it.

• 41:56Speaker 04

  No, we tell people Spy, that to me is the greatest film of the century.

• 42:01Drew Afualo?

  I love the movie Spy. I bought it on Apple TV for like thirty-four bucks cuz I was like, keep, keep, keep forever. Yep. Even, even my fiance goes, you're gonna buy it? I go, why would I rent it?

• 42:10Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm, right.

• 42:11Drew Afualo?

  Buy.

• 42:11Speaker 04

  Cuz I'm just gonna rent it again.

• 42:13Drew Afualo?

  Charge my account. Thank you.

• 42:14Speaker 04

  Yeah, we have it memorized. This is actually really private, but I'm gonna share this with you.

• 42:18Drew Afualo?

  Oh, no.

• 42:19Speaker 04

  There's a theme song in the beginning.

• 42:20Drew Afualo?

  We've never shared this before publicly.

• 42:23Speaker 04

  Every night I sing it to Jordan before bed. Cuz we love that movie so much.

• 42:28Drew Afualo?

  It's the spy song at the beginning. She sings it, but she does it in like a little voice and she does like choreographed dance moves with it.

• 42:33Speaker 04

  A heart is a hunter.

• 42:34Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. Yep, yep.

• 42:36Speaker 04

  And I cradle Jordan's face and I sing that.

• 42:39Drew Afualo?

  Every night. And that's romance. My sister's thinking, me and who? Me and who for real. My sister's like, me and who for real.

• 42:46Speaker 04

  Come over, me, you and us.

• 42:47Drew Afualo?

  You and us, yeah.

• 42:48Speaker 04

  You and us, we'll do it.

• 42:49Drew Afualo?

  Kendall will perform it for you. You're on a king size bed, get on over. You sleep at the end like a cat.

• 42:57Drew Afualo?

  That's so funny. I fucking love that movie. Oh god, it's good.

• 43:01Speaker 02

  But why not an Oscar?

• 43:02Drew Afualo?

  That's what I'm saying. Why not an Oscar? You know what's funny is, that's how I felt when we saw Hobbs and Shaw.

• 43:07Speaker 02

  Oh, The Rock, you guys like that movie?

• 43:09Drew Afualo?

  Actually made a mistake.

• 43:10Speaker 02

  Because Jordan, all my life is just trying to get people to not bring up Hobbs and Shaw in front of Jordan.

• 43:17Drew Afualo?

  I did not know that, so.

• 43:18Speaker 02

  Well, I'm a Fast and Furious fan to begin with, in general. Especially, and I'll say it once Paul Walker died.

• 43:28Speaker 02

  Once he kinda got out of the way, we were able to do some real fun stuff. And, uh, he's done a lot of weird things, so I feel comfortable saying that.

• 43:35Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, it really took off after that.

• 43:37Speaker 02

  Things really, yeah, popped off in a big way. And I think Hobbs and Shaw is kind of the best example of that. It's so fun, it's so funny. I mean, obviously, we already know The Rock is funny. Jason Statham, once again, spy, Hobbs and Shaw.

• 43:51Drew Afualo?

  It's so funny, yeah.

• 43:51Speaker 02

  Jason Statham is so unbelievably funny.

• 43:54Drew Afualo?

  I'd have sex with him.

• 43:56Speaker 02

  I would too. Would you?

• 43:57Drew Afualo?

  Like, a lot of it.

• 43:58Speaker 02

  Yeah!

• 43:59Drew Afualo?

  I'm obsessed with Jason Statham.

• 44:00Speaker 02

  He's gotta be good at sex, right?

• 44:03Drew Afualo?

  I bet. Look at his wife.

• 44:05Speaker 02

  Unbelievable. And they've been together for a long time.

• 44:07Drew Afualo?

  I know, and they have a baby, I think. They're like a little family. I love that. No, that movie, we went with, it was me, my sister, my fiance, and my brother. And we were trying to see something else, but it was like sold out, and we were like, oh, let's go see Hobbs and Shaw. It's like the spinoff from Fast and the Furious. We're like, okay. We go, bitch, I was laughing my ass, when they're on the plane and Kevin Hart's there. I literally had tears going down.

• 44:30Speaker 02

  The Rock's in that little like tan tracksuit.

• 44:33Drew Afualo?

  I was laughing my ass off. I love, I tell everyone to watch that movie.

• 44:38Speaker 02

  Idris Elba as the villain?

• 44:41Speaker 02

  He's a robot from the future?

• 44:42Drew Afualo?

  A stacked cast.

• 44:43Speaker 02

  It's unbelievable.

• 44:44Drew Afualo?

  Lot of famous people in that movie. That's why sometimes I feel like people will recommend to me like, oh, have you seen Conclave? I'm like, no, but have you seen Hobbs and Shaw? I feel like a fifteen year old boy. I'm like, what about, have you guys seen Ricky Stenicki?

• 44:57Speaker 04

  No.

• 44:57Drew Afualo?

  Oh, get into it bitch. It's on Prime, I think.

• 45:00Speaker 04

  What is?

• 45:01Drew Afualo?

  It has, uh, who is it? John Cena.

• 45:03Speaker 04

  Okay, love.

• 45:04Drew Afualo?

  He's, he's Ricky Stenicki. And then there's like, Cheeto Santino, Andrew Santino.

• 45:09Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 45:09Drew Afualo?

  The comic. He's in that. Who else is in that? Do you know? Zac Efron's in it, yes. I love Zac Efron. Oh my god, I have the biggest crush on Zac Efron.

• 45:20Speaker 04

  And I think Zac Efron.

• 45:21Drew Afualo?

  Lesbians love Zac Efron.

• 45:21Speaker 04

  Zac Efron is another person, I feel like when we first met, I was like, you know who I think is actually a really good actor is Zac Efron.

• 45:28Drew Afualo?

  Right, I mean, he's actually Iron Claw. Yeah.

• 45:31Speaker 04

  Well, I saw, I saw Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates four times in theaters.

• 45:37Speaker 04

  Which is, actually should be illegal.

• 45:40Drew Afualo?

  Okay, Ricky Stenicki. I do like Adam Devine, isn't he the other person?

• 45:42Speaker 04

  Yeah, he's funny.

• 45:42Drew Afualo?

  Love him. Ricky Stenicki, this is a new movie? Yeah, it's, it came out last year, but it's basically the premise of it is there's like three best friends, which is like Zac Efron and his two friends. Um, and they, like, when they're kids, they blame something that they did bad on this fake person named Ricky Stenicki. And then as they get older, get married, all that stuff, they always blame this friend Ricky. And then they always have an excuse as to why he can't come to things, why they, the wives can never meet him. And then they basically fuck up and one of them uses Ricky Stenicki without asking permission. And so they have to basically find someone to play Ricky Stenicki. And they find John Cena. Girl, they find him in like a fucking casino, like, he's like doing magic, like David, like he does characters and like. He's so funny, too.

• 46:27Drew Afualo?

  He's so, when I tell you that movie is so fucking, everybody hates that movie, but me and my family.

• 46:32Speaker 04

  No.

• 46:33Drew Afualo?

  I can't wait to watch it.

• 46:34Speaker 04

  We'll watch it tonight.

• 46:35Drew Afualo?

  And John Cena is so funny in it. I even told one of my friends to watch it and she watched it, she goes, maybe I need to watch it with you guys. I didn't laugh as much.

• 46:44Drew Afualo?

  I was like, you don't get the art.

• 46:45Speaker 04

  Some people don't get it.

• 46:45Drew Afualo?

  High art.

• 46:46Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 46:46Drew Afualo?

  Some people don't get it.

• 46:47Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 46:48Drew Afualo?

  I feel like you guys would vibe with it though, since you like Spy and Hobbs and Shaw. I think so, yeah.

• 46:51Speaker 04

  I'm always just looking for movies, like the second there's a man in a suit in a movie, I'm not watching it.

• 46:57Speaker 02

  Like, I'm not watching a man in a suit talking in a little voice while pouring whiskey. I'm not interested.

• 47:01Drew Afualo?

  I'm not doing it.

• 47:02Speaker 02

  And that's always what the Oscar, no, I'm sorry, I'm not interested.

• 47:05Drew Afualo?

  I know, they're so, and it's like, it was funny, because one time my sister and I were talking, and she was like, "Do you want to go see Sonic 3 with us?" Like, I heard my brother, and I go, "I haven't seen the other Sonics." And she was like, "You don't need to see them, dude." She was like, "Here's the plot of every Sonic, new Sonic." That's the plot of every Sonic. And she goes, "And then old Sonics team up and recruit new Sonic." That's the whole plot.

• 47:24Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 47:25Drew Afualo?

  And I was like, "I gotta watch the other ones." And then, as the conversation moved on, I go, "I haven't, we should watch the new Gladiator." And then she goes, "Well, you haven't seen the first one." I go, "I don't need to fucking see that."

• 47:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 47:34Drew Afualo?

  And I was like, with Sonic, I'm like, "I won't understand his lore." With Gladiator, I'm like, "Man, I got the gist, man fighting, whatever."

• 47:40Speaker 02

  Yeah, well, I mean Gladiator is like, real world, stuff like that happen, like, who cares? Sonic is like a built kind of universe, you know? So I get it. There's a lot more complexities in the Sonic universe.

• 47:49Drew Afualo?

  I agree with you. I think you're right. What would you guys say is your favorite movie, then? I know yours is Spy.

• 47:54Speaker 02

  Spy.

• 47:54Drew Afualo?

  But what's yours?

• 47:55Speaker 02

  I would say Spy is our favorite movie, is a couple. And then, um, and that's a thing, you guys, if you guys don't have that, there's something wrong with you. Um, that's our favorite movie, is a couple. Um, Grease is probably my favorite movie.

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• 49:47Drew Afualo?

  In the World. I love that movie. I went through a real hyperfixation phase when I was a kid.

• 49:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 49:52Drew Afualo?

  That movie. To the point where I like bought everything in Grease Memorabilia. My parents got me the deluxe CD set.

• 50:00Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 50:00Drew Afualo?

  I remember I used to put it in my CD player, I used to put my headphones on. And I would blast that shit and I would sing out loud at top volume.

• 50:08Speaker 02

  How about that?

• 50:09Drew Afualo?

  And every, God bless my dad. My dad would drive me to school. And I remember I was, I was singing my heart out one morning. And my dad would have to sit in traffic for hours taking me to school because we lived far away. And then at one point, he like, he tapped me and then I took my headphones off. He goes, I can't do it today. I love you so much, I can't do it today. And then I was like, what do you mean? Because I'm like 11.

• 50:30Speaker 02

  You're hitting the high note.

• 50:31Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 50:35Drew Afualo?

  And I can't sing for shit, but I'm singing like with my full chest, like loud belting.

• 50:39Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 50:40Drew Afualo?

  I can't do it today, I'm so sorry.

• 50:41Speaker 02

  This tells me that we have similar dads with similar energies. Because I used to do pretty much the same thing. But for me, for a long period of time, it was the Rent soundtrack.

• 50:49Drew Afualo?

  Ooh, love.

• 50:50Speaker 02

  And I would turn down the music. So it's, it's so loud, it's blasting. And then I would turn it down anytime there was a curse word or a sexual reference. And I'm also a child, so I don't know a lot of the references. So I'm sure like my dad's confused because I'm like turning it down for some things, but not like other things. And then finally, one day, my dad was just like, hey, you know what? I've actually heard all these words. So let's just leave it on one volume the whole time, but me just singing at the top of my lungs. Yep. Yeah, but in the car for two hours, drive me to school, theater, practice, whatever. My dad just truly an angel from heaven.

• 51:24Drew Afualo?

  I know, mine too. My dad would listen to me every morning. I wouldn't talk at all. I'd just be sitting there in the front seat, singing my ass off, like my life depended on it.

• 51:32Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 51:32Drew Afualo?

  And then one, he's like, I love you so much. I can't do it.

• 51:34Speaker 04

  That's so funny.

• 51:36Drew Afualo?

  I love you though. I love you so much.

• 51:36Speaker 04

  That makes me sad though, because I'm like, that must have been a really, what did he have going on that day?

• 51:42Speaker 04

  That must have been a, he was not, that was a really bad day that day.

• 51:45Drew Afualo?

  Fired from his job. And he didn't even listen to me sing that.

• 51:49Speaker 02

  He just found out a friend from high school died or something.

• 51:51Drew Afualo?

  That's the worst thing.

• 51:57Speaker 02

  A hundred percent, yeah, yeah.

• 51:59Drew Afualo?

  So she's a couple movies spy.

• 52:01Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 52:01Drew Afualo?

  Right?

• 52:02Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah.

• 52:02Drew Afualo?

  Any fave, any other honorable mentions of fave movies?

• 52:06Speaker 04

  Jungle, Jungle Book. But no Jungle Cruise.

• 52:08Drew Afualo?

  Jungle Book?

• 52:09Speaker 04

  Not Jungle Book, Jungle Cruise.

• 52:11Drew Afualo?

  Jungle Cruise was a good movie.

• 52:12Speaker 04

  And Emily Blunt.

• 52:13Drew Afualo?

  That was a good one. Even though they had him playing a Spanish man, what's that about?

• 52:17Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah. I know there was some, there was some. Jordan probably turned to me, looked at me like, why say that one? Because I know there was some problem.

• 52:25Drew Afualo?

  I love Jungle Cruise. I actually really liked that movie.

• 52:28Speaker 04

  There was problematic stuff with that one.

• 52:30Drew Afualo?

  Stuff that made you kind of go huh?

• 52:31Speaker 04

  Uh huh.

• 52:31Drew Afualo?

  That was one of those where I felt like, oh, you just checking a box. They're like, we need brown, but famous.

• 52:37Speaker 04

  Sure. The Rock.

• 52:38Drew Afualo?

  Okay, The Rock. Yeah, obviously, obviously The Rock. Yeah, I was like, well, I mean, whatever he doesn't want, I'll take. We have similar builds. Just ask me. That's why I tell them all the time. I'm like, it's funny because the live action Moana, when they did like an open call for it, I didn't go because they didn't invite me. And I only knew because I actually know a lot of Samoan people who were going and doing the open call. Uh, because there's not many of us and I follow most of them and am related to half of them. So I made a TikTok like jokingly going, was anyone going to call me or I'm open, I'm available? And then they ended up like reaching out to me because my video did really well. And, uh, well, first off, Deadline posted an article quoting my video saying Drew said, Drew Fola says,

• 53:23Drew Afualo?

  I'll play Moana's dad if that's what it takes. Why is that the quote you pull?

• 53:27Speaker 04

  Sure.

• 53:28Drew Afualo?

  Why did you pull, of all the things I said?

• 53:30Speaker 04

  It would be so funny then after all this for you to play Moana's dad.

• 53:34Speaker 02

  It just feels so embarrassing, like you beg.

• 53:36Drew Afualo?

  Then it would be like hairspray. I'd be John Travolta.

• 53:39Speaker 02

  Yeah, absolutely.

• 53:40Drew Afualo?

  Right, exactly.

• 53:41Speaker 02

  I'm like, Moana's dad, I don't even remember him from the movie. Is he a big character?

• 53:45Drew Afualo?

  Uh, well, I mean, I'm not playing him regardless, so I think, I'm not too sure in the live action. But I, I did actually get like, a reach out from them saying like, well, we already cast like, all principal people, but we know we have some side characters. If you wanna do reads for them.

• 54:00Speaker 02

  The chicken.

• 54:01Drew Afualo?

  And I'm like, I'm like, sure. I, I sure, I go and look, they sent me three, all of them, men.

• 54:06Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 54:06Drew Afualo?

  Um, and it was like, uh, like Fisherman, Coconut Farmer, Coconut Farmer mad. And I was like, right, I hope I get Fisherman.

• 54:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 54:17Drew Afualo?

  Cause Fisherman has three lines and these other ones have two.

• 54:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 54:20Drew Afualo?

  And that's like, I did them all, didn't get one.

• 54:22Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 54:22Drew Afualo?

  Oh, bummer. But you know what's funny is like, I did the read and I was like, wow, that's so cool. Like maybe, like, maybe they'll just pick me just so I can like be in the background, whatever. And then like a couple of months later, it was like to someone, I was like, oh, I actually got like, a read for them, uh, from the live action Moana. And my friend was like, oh yeah, they just started filming, right? Like a couple of weeks ago. And I go, I didn't know that, so.

• 54:45Speaker 02

  That's the worst.

• 54:46Drew Afualo?

  I have to make a couple of calls.

• 54:47Speaker 02

  That is the worst.

• 54:48Speaker 04

  That same thing happened to me when the announcement of Little House on the Prairie happened. They said, it's been cast. I said, interesting. Didn't receive a call.

• 54:57Speaker 02

  One of the results.

• 54:58Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 54:58Speaker 02

  One of the results.

• 55:00Speaker 04

  Is this how you tell me?

• 55:02Speaker 02

  You see a commercial you audition for. You say, oh, this movie's coming out, that's so interesting.

• 55:09Speaker 04

  It's always, man, that hit me hard. And people were like, a lot of people, cause I posted about it, I was like, oh, not cast in Little House on the Prairie, like, that really sucks, like, really bad.

• 55:18Speaker 02

  Who'd you audition for, for Little?

• 55:19Speaker 04

  Anybody. I mean, my dream, Nellie Olsen.

• 55:22Speaker 02

  Yeah, obviously. You don't wanna be Laura Ingalls?

• 55:24Speaker 04

  No, I don't think I'm good enough to be Laura Ingalls. I don't have the charm. People would not root for me the way. They root for her. I think Nellie would be great, but they were, people were like, oh yeah, it's um, they would DM me and they'd be like, I think they're mostly casting children. And I was like, I didn't even think about that. I'm so in my like, you bring up Little House on the Prairie, I'm still eight years old. I was like, I'll play the lead and they were like.

• 55:46Speaker 02

  Oh yeah, my family and I go, I got the fever spot, Pa. We say that to each other all the time, just cause.

• 55:51Drew Afualo?

  I fully miss this.

• 55:53Speaker 02

  From Little House on the Prairie?

• 55:54Speaker 04

  Come on.

• 55:54Drew Afualo?

  It just like wasn't a thing in my house. Honestly, it's, it's kind of shocking to me that it was a thing in my house. I don't, that's, that doesn't really sound like my family to watch Little House on the Prairie, but you know.

• 56:04Speaker 02

  Kendall makes me watch like fan edits of Little House on the Prairie.

• 56:07Speaker 04

  Isn't this a perverted one?

• 56:09Speaker 02

  No, not funny, and you laugh at them.

• 56:11Speaker 04

  You're trying to play it cool.

• 56:12Drew Afualo?

  And you laugh.

• 56:13Speaker 04

  And this one's fake, I don't really know.

• 56:16Speaker 02

  Yeah, I don't get it. It's true. I'm not, I could not be less interested in anything than that time period.

• 56:23Speaker 04

  Colonial time.

• 56:24Speaker 02

  Wagon.

• 56:24Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, skip over it.

• 56:26Speaker 02

  Wagon time?

• 56:27Drew Afualo?

  Don't need to see it.

• 56:28Speaker 02

  Could not tell you what years those were, but I'm not interested.

• 56:31Speaker 04

  Dust Bowl era?

• 56:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, just like kind of dirty wagon, white people, outside a lot.

• 56:37Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, dust.

• 56:39Speaker 02

  I'm just not interested in that.

• 56:40Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, see, I'm good.

• 56:43Speaker 04

  I'm very interested.

• 56:44Speaker 02

  Why do you want to watch that?

• 56:45Speaker 04

  I'm very interested. I just want to like, I don't know, I want to like.

• 56:49Drew Afualo?

  She yearns for the covered wagons.

• 56:50Speaker 04

  I do. Well, I just started horseback riding lessons.

• 56:54Speaker 02

  Oh my god.

• 56:54Speaker 04

  And I know my, my coach, dare I say, is like, this bitch is so annoying because I really get on the horse and I'm like, playing pretend. Like I am like, she's like trying to teach me helpful tools to ride the horse and I'm just in my own zone.

• 57:09Drew Afualo?

  She turns back, your hair's in braids.

• 57:11Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 57:11Drew Afualo?

  Every time she turns back, you have a new piece song.

• 57:14Speaker 02

  You're nerfing into it. We're watching The Last of Us right now and Kendall keeps being like, she's taking one horseback riding lesson. She keeps being like, anytime they're on the horse, she's like, see? This is why we have to learn how to ride horses. And I'm like, you're, that's not why we're dying in the apocalypse.

• 57:28Drew Afualo?

  We have other skills we should probably learn.

• 57:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 57:30Drew Afualo?

  Outside of the horse riding part.

• 57:32Speaker 04

  But what skills? You're not learning any skills.

• 57:35Speaker 02

  So at least I started. You have all this judgment for what we should be doing. Why don't you start freeze drying something?

• 57:40Drew Afualo?

  You know, everyone lies, everyone laughs now until there's only a horse for transport. That's the only mode of transportation.

• 57:48Speaker 02

  No, if the apocalypse happens, I'm dead.

• 57:50Drew Afualo?

  Me too.

• 57:50Speaker 02

  Later.

• 57:51Drew Afualo?

  I'm, I'm killing myself. I'm like by my own hand, I'm going out.

• 57:54Speaker 04

  Jordan keeps saying that, Jordan keeps going, well, if there's an apocalypse, I'm murder suiciding, suiciding us. I'm like, do not bring, ask me first, please. I don't want you, and she's like, and our dog. I'm like, no, you can't, you have to just make your own decisions.

• 58:07Speaker 02

  All three of us are going out.

• 58:08Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, me too. That's how I feel too. I've told my man, I'm like, we're living out that episode of The Last of Us with the gay couple.

• 58:13Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 58:13Drew Afualo?

  With Nick Offerman.

• 58:14Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 58:15Drew Afualo?

  That's what we're doing. I'm, I'm, I'm like caving us in, like we're all in our own thing, our own water supply. Party till we die.

• 58:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 58:22Drew Afualo?

  Once we're out, we're out.

• 58:23Speaker 02

  Because live for what?

• 58:25Drew Afualo?

  I know.

• 58:26Speaker 02

  Live for why?

• 58:27Drew Afualo?

  I've said that too. I was like, I don't want to live in the aftermath of that.

• 58:29Speaker 02

  No way.

• 58:30Drew Afualo?

  I'm good. You guys kick it back up and I'll be reincarnated.

• 58:32Speaker 02

  Sure. If there's no air conditioning, girl.

• 58:35Drew Afualo?

  I said, once my phone dies, I'm out.

• 58:37Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 58:37Drew Afualo?

  Don't need to be here anymore.

• 58:38Speaker 02

  Absolutely.

• 58:39Drew Afualo?

  My phone and my Kindle. Like, once my Kindle dies, now I'm for real gone.

• 58:43Speaker 02

  Oh, man. Yeah, and there's just things where it's like, I think about it and I'm like, oh, I wouldn't be able to get a Jersey Mike's sandwich.

• 58:51Drew Afualo?

  I love Jersey Mike's.

• 58:52Speaker 02

  Kill me. You know what I mean? I can get a turkey and provolone with extra cherry pepper relish. Bye. Gun in my mouth.

• 58:58Drew Afualo?

  You guys don't have this at the end of the world?

• 59:01Speaker 02

  No way.

• 59:02Drew Afualo?

  I love Jersey Mike's.

• 59:03Speaker 02

  Delicious.

• 59:04Drew Afualo?

  It's so good. I've been on a Jersey Mike's kick lately.

• 59:07Speaker 02

  What's the order?

• 59:07Drew Afualo?

  Uh, I get, I think like, I'm gonna be so real, my man orders my sandwich, so I don't remember the exact order. All I know is it's like turkey, lettuce, banana peppers, mustard. What else do I have on there? I think jalapenos, salt and pepper?

• 59:23Speaker 04

  There's something very masculine about a person ordering your sandwich. I think first, I'm like fully gay, but for some reason, my instinct was to be like, a man should be ordering your sandwich. It feels so like-

• 59:32Drew Afualo?

  It feels like a switch.

• 59:33Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 59:34Drew Afualo?

  I feel that. No, I know, he always, he likes to like order on DoorDash and stuff. I'm like, sounds good.

• 59:39Speaker 04

  Oh, that's nice.

• 59:40Drew Afualo?

  That's where I'm like, I'm cool with gender roles in that part. Yeah, you go ahead and take that, King. I believe in you.

• 59:44Speaker 04

  I mean, I feel like we're constantly trying to put gender roles on ourselves. Like, it feels so hot. I know nothing about anything building wise, but the second I'm holding a hammer, all of a sudden I'm like, why don't you keep your pretty little mouth shut? You don't know about this stuff.

• 59:58Drew Afualo?

  Go buy yourself something pretty while I take care of this.

• 1:00:00Speaker 04

  Yeah, I love it. I'm eating it up.

• 1:00:02Speaker 02

  Okay. Sure. I love it.

• 1:00:06Drew Afualo?

  Oh, I wanted to mention this, we'll have to bleep this part, but I did get a read of, uh, from the new season of

• 1:00:12Drew Afualo?

  but it was for a small role to play a podcast host. They told me to talk my shit in it, like, they didn't even give me lines, they just said, like, freestyle a minute of you talking about something related to, like, misogyny. The role is literally made, like, it feels like it was made for me.

• 1:00:28Speaker 04

  It's you, yeah.

• 1:00:28Drew Afualo?

  And in my slate, I literally said, like, I just want to mention, I am a podcast host of two. If I don't get this, that's embarrassing. Guess what? Didn't get it.

• 1:00:36Speaker 04

  Of course.

• 1:00:37Drew Afualo?

  And you know who did? They got pissed off at me.

• 1:00:39Speaker 04

  You know who did? Cara Delevingne.

• 1:00:41Drew Afualo?

  That's who's gonna play that part.

• 1:00:42Speaker 04

  You know who did?

• 1:00:42Drew Afualo?

  That's who's gonna play that part. Mikey Madison. That's who got my part. I fucking bet.

• 1:00:46Speaker 04

  Yep, 100%.

• 1:00:47Drew Afualo?

  I bet. I fucking bet.

• 1:00:49Speaker 04

  Every single time.

• 1:00:50Drew Afualo?

  And I was laughing, cause I was like, oh no, for sure, for sure.

• 1:00:52Speaker 04

  Oh, man.

• 1:00:54Drew Afualo?

  Well, I do have some fun facts about y'all.

• 1:00:55Speaker 04

  What?

• 1:00:56Drew Afualo?

  Would you like, would you like to hear them?

• 1:00:58Speaker 04

  Sure.

• 1:00:59Drew Afualo?

  Okay, mentally prepare. I'm just kidding. Okay, for, uh, Kendall. It says on here that you did your first stand-up set at 11 years old.

• 1:01:08Speaker 04

  I did. I feel like that, you know, this is, it was, it was ultimately plagiarized and not my own material. But I did steal a professional stand-up comedian. But it was, I was so young, I didn't think, I was like, this is what stand-up is. So I looked up a stand-up set and I wrote it down, and then I went and I performed it, and people were like, that was really good. An 11-year-old. I was like, thank you so much.

• 1:01:31Speaker 02

  You wrote that yourself?

• 1:01:32Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:01:32Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:01:34Speaker 04

  And I did, and it didn't even feel like lying at the time, but I did, I did do that.

• 1:01:38Drew Afualo?

  Well, love that. It says on Jordan, it says, your appendix burst in 2018 during Halloween.

• 1:01:44Speaker 04

  What is this? Famousbirthdays.com? What are you looking at? Okay, so during Halloween? Not to my recollection, but maybe. I don't remember what time of year it was. Yeah, my, I, 2018 was rough for, for me. Um, I got dumped very suddenly from some, by someone, or really, it's okay, we're getting married.

• 1:02:07Speaker 02

  It's fine, everything's fine. It worked out in the long run with someone else. But it was like, someone dumped me very suddenly after, for so long, I was like, maybe we should break up. I think maybe it's like, not good. And they were like, no, you are wrong. And I was like, sure, probably. And then we went on a two-week trip to France and they dumped me. And

• 1:02:26Speaker 04

  In France?

• 1:02:27Speaker 02

  On the, kind of, half there, half when we got back.

• 1:02:31Speaker 04

  That's crazy.

• 1:02:32Speaker 02

  Long breakup. Lasted like, maybe 48 hours. And then, um, maybe a week later, my appendix exploded.

• 1:02:42Speaker 04

  And not just, most people don't have that happen. Like, most people, it gets inflamed.

• 1:02:47Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:02:47Speaker 04

  And it's so painful, they go to the hospital and then they remove the appendix. Jordan's fully burst at home.

• 1:02:53Speaker 02

  Oh my god.

• 1:02:54Speaker 04

  In two.

• 1:02:55Speaker 02

  Tolerance. So my appendix fully exploded and then I was in the hospital for quite some time.

• 1:03:00Speaker 04

  You were also going through something so tumultuous right before that, so I'm not surprised you didn't like, feel anything.

• 1:03:05Speaker 02

  Sure, yes. And then even more so, so two days before my appendix exploded, I was seeing the SpongeBob musical on Broadway. And I got a call from my doctor, who I literally hadn't heard from in like, six months. And she was like, I think you have lupus, you need to go to the doctor and go see some specialists. So it was like, just back to back to back at the end of 2018. And

• 1:03:26Speaker 04

  Were you excited, though, a little bit, like, once you woke up in the hospital? Because I feel like that's kind of the dream after getting dumped, to be like, and now I'm in the hospital.

• 1:03:34Speaker 02

  You're all, yeah. No, a little bit.

• 1:03:35Speaker 04

  I'm gonna cash that in, that's for sure. That's one free call to an X.

• 1:03:39Speaker 02

  Yes, and they did call me.

• 1:03:41Speaker 04

  Let you know I'm in the hospital.

• 1:03:42Speaker 02

  They did call me while I was in the hospital.

• 1:03:44Speaker 04

  Period.

• 1:03:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, they called me and they said, I can't be there for you right now. And I said, you called me! Then hang up the phone.

• 1:04:27Speaker 05

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• 1:05:00Drew Afualo?

  You dialed this number.

• 1:05:01Speaker 04

  Just wanted to call and let you know.

• 1:05:03Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:03Speaker 04

  I can't be there.

• 1:05:04Drew Afualo?

  Yes.

• 1:05:05Speaker 04

  And I said, alright. Thanks for letting me know. I'm high on morphine and I gotta go. Just want to make sure you're still alive. Oh, thank God, I was gonna feel bad for breaking up with you. Alright, well, I can't make it, so I won't be there.

• 1:05:18Drew Afualo?

  Jeez.

• 1:05:19Speaker 04

  Yeah, so that was the end of my 2018.

• 1:05:21Drew Afualo?

  Damn. Well, that's not a very fun fact, then.

• 1:05:23Speaker 04

  I think it's a fun story. I think we've all moved past it and I'm stronger now. I have one less body part.

• 1:05:31Drew Afualo?

  For Kendall, it says you had a dog named Tinkerbell, who you named when she was five.

• 1:05:35Speaker 04

  Where are these facts from? This is terrifying. Yes, I do. I did. She was eaten by a bear, I'm pretty sure. But she was absolutely delightful. I felt so bad. Being a parent must be so hard. I don't think I'm ever gonna have children, but when I was five...

• 1:05:52Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I'm not, so you aren't good company here.

• 1:05:55Speaker 04

  And I think just thinking through my childhood of what I put my mom through, I'm like, I absolutely cannot do that. And I, on my fifth birthday, I was like, I want a dog. I want a dog so bad. Please, can I have a dog? So my mom takes me to a shelter, which, we were in the deep south. I don't know if this is as common. I don't know. This feels like a very southern thing. But every shelter you go to, it's like, not a legal shelter. It's like, what is this? Do you know what I mean? Where it's kind of like a woman in her house who's like, "This is my dog's shelter." And you're like, okay. Um, so we go in and they had all these puppies and they basically told me like, this is like, we're getting shut down. So like, basically whatever dog you choose is kind of like, the one that makes it out. Very sad. I'm five. I was like, okay, great. My mom was like, oh, look how many cute puppies. There's so many cute puppies.

• 1:06:40Speaker 04

  And I immediately was like, that one. And it was a dog sitting in mud, which, once again, not a reputable shelter. A dog sitting in mud, probably three years old, so like traumatized, truly, like Tinkerbell had clearly been through a lot. And I was like, I want to name her Jennifer. Was at first what I wanted to name her. And then we landed on Tinkerbell.

• 1:07:01Drew Afualo?

  Funny name for a dog.

• 1:07:02Speaker 04

  Very funny. And then I landed on Tinkerbell. I was like, that's fine. And this poor dog, it was just like she, if anyone spoke, she'd pee where she was. She was like, an absolute, like, something was just not there in her brain. Like, she'd run into walls, like, she was just.

• 1:07:16Drew Afualo?

  I've had quite a few dogs like that.

• 1:07:17Speaker 04

  Yes. And I was obsessed with her. I, I loved her so much. I loved her so much.

• 1:07:23Drew Afualo?

  First it was gonna be Jennifer, but unfortunately we landed on Tinkerbell.

• 1:07:27Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:07:28Drew Afualo?

  It's so funny. I've had quite a few dogs in my lifetime, but my man, he's only had one dog. Like, and I was like, oh, bitch, I've had like, what feels like nine thousand dogs my whole lifetime. But that was just because like, uh, we would like, almost, fall into having dogs. Like, we would find them.

• 1:07:44Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:07:45Drew Afualo?

  Or we would go through us where we're like, we should get a dog. And then we'd have one, and then we'd get like, three more. It was very strange.

• 1:07:49Speaker 04

  Where did you grow up? Like?

• 1:07:51Drew Afualo?

  I grew up in, uh, the inland empire here, Southern California.

• 1:07:54Speaker 04

  Okay. Why does it say? Cause I feel like in the South, that was also another thing. It's like, there were so many just like dogs, kind of wandering around. And if you like, caught your mom on a good day, it was kind of like getting ice cream. You'd be like, can I have this dog? Like, we never really seeked out, except for like Tinkerbell, like, seeked out getting a dog.

• 1:08:10Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, same. I think the only dog that we like, went and got was, like, when my sister was like a sophomore in high school, junior. Uh, she asked for an English Bulldog. Like, she really wanted an English Bulldog. My mom loves to do this thing where like, whenever she would introduce a pet into the family, she liked to play this game with us where she goes, what are we gonna name it? And my mom was like obsessed with D names, because all my siblings and I have the same initials. And so, we'd be like, Taco, right? Burrito. Like, we'd be naming something cute and fun. My mom's like, oh, that's great, great suggestions. Okay, his name is Duke. I've actually already named him. I already printed the tag, but that was fun. I'm glad we did that. My mom would have these naming parties, and then she'd be like, perfect, perfect. Her name's Darla. So. Perfect, perfect, perfect. Her name's Daphne. So like every dog we've ever had, we have never

• 1:08:55Drew Afualo?

  named, like, until I got my dogs now. I have two little Frenchies now.

• 1:08:59Speaker 04

  What are their names?

• 1:09:00Drew Afualo?

  Squid and tuna.

• 1:09:01Speaker 04

  Oh, that's cute.

• 1:09:02Drew Afualo?

  Squid was my-

• 1:09:03Speaker 04

  Not D names? Sorry, not D names.

• 1:09:06Drew Afualo?

  That's right. I was like, I'm rebelling immediately, yeah.

• 1:09:08Speaker 04

  I feel like I would be that way though as a parent. Like, I can't even with my nephews. Like, the other day, he had this like dragon Lego, and I was like, oh, what's its name? And he was like, Draggy. And I was like, that's stupid. Like, I can't-

• 1:09:20Drew Afualo?

  Hey, that's dumb. Pick something else.

• 1:09:21Speaker 04

  Name it something else. Like, name it a normal Draggy? Like, I don't know what that even is.

• 1:09:26Drew Afualo?

  Like, it was like this fun little game we like to play. Do you guys have any ideas? Perfect. His name's Dracula.

• 1:09:32Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:09:32Drew Afualo?

  So, I'm glad we all did that together.

• 1:09:34Speaker 04

  That's a think tank.

• 1:09:35Drew Afualo?

  Yes, yeah. Let's get the good, the bad ideas out of the way.

• 1:09:38Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, exactly.

• 1:09:38Drew Afualo?

  Perfect, perfect.

• 1:09:39Speaker 02

  Just brainstorming.

• 1:09:40Drew Afualo?

  Uh, it says for you, Jordan, that you used to have a job writing sleep stories for the Calm app.

• 1:09:46Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah. I, I used to write, uh, well, really, I wrote one, and it honestly has gotten me recognized more than anything else I've ever done.

• 1:09:56Drew Afualo?

  Really?

• 1:09:56Speaker 02

  Um, yeah, I wrote a children's story for the Calm app, which is like the meditation app.

• 1:10:02Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:02Speaker 02

  They do these sleep stories for kids, and you, like, I guess, I don't know, put them on when your kid goes to sleep so your kid leaves you alone. And I wrote one that, I initially pitched it about like a robot, or what, but in the, at the end, it ended up being like a napkin, and it's about like a non-binary napkin. And it's called Spot the Napkin, and still to this day, people will, like, I'll like work with someone who's like kind of famous on something.

• 1:10:31Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:31Speaker 02

  They will have been like a normal level of nice and interested in me, like, you know, so not that interested in me on set or whatever, and then I'll get home and I'll have a DM from them that'll be like, hey, I'm so sorry, I got home and I realized where I recognized your name from. You are the author of Spot the Napkin. My son listens to it every night when he goes to bed, and I just want to thank you for what you've done for my family, and then they're like liking all my Instagram posts and everything. Um, yeah.

• 1:10:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, because I was doing any, like during the pandemic and like when I first moved out to LA, like you just have to do whatever. I wrote clickbait at one point.

• 1:11:06Drew Afualo?

  No, the Calm app, that's honestly really cool. Thank you. You wrote something for that app. That's so sick. I actually have that app. Okay.

• 1:11:13Speaker 04

  It was a fun era in our household too, because like writing kids' stories is like so fun. And you can do it about anything. So I would be like throwing in my, my hat in the ring. I'd be like, what if it was an avocado? That decides.

• 1:11:26Speaker 02

  Jordan never took them. They were always like, no.

• 1:11:29Drew Afualo?

  Again, she's like, perfect, bad ideas.

• 1:11:30Speaker 02

  Yeah, I was like, any ideas?

• 1:11:31Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, think tank, think tank. You're right. This is good.

• 1:11:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, but it was nice too. And they were like, I wrote for a couple of different children's things and they were taking ideas left and right and paying me money for them. So I felt like I was like a 1980s businessman, high on cocaine. Like I was just like, oh, oh, what if it's a dog and the dog plays soccer? And they were like, great, here's, here's $600. I was like, perfect. So it was just nonstop, but it did, it paid the rent for a while.

• 1:11:56Drew Afualo?

  You're a man of many hats.

• 1:11:57Speaker 02

  You know, you gotta be if your parents aren't famous.

• 1:12:01Drew Afualo?

  For real. Kendall, it says that you used to work as a gym janitor?

• 1:12:06Speaker 04

  I did. That was my job when I was before I was on, it's called Dog Pound. Do you know Dog Pound?

• 1:12:13Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I do know Dog Pound.

• 1:12:14Speaker 02

  Celebrity gym.

• 1:12:14Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, the black and white one.

• 1:12:15Speaker 04

  Mm hmm.

• 1:12:16Drew Afualo?

  You were a janitor at the Dog Pound?

• 1:12:18Speaker 04

  I was a janitor there. I, you know, it didn't pay well.

• 1:12:21Drew Afualo?

  How worse people in the world go to that gym?

• 1:12:24Speaker 04

  It truly was.

• 1:12:25Drew Afualo?

  I'm imagining you in there.

• 1:12:27Speaker 04

  And I always had the biggest, I don't know what is this? Cause I've, this was my kind of second janitorial position. And they never just give you a normal fucking vacuum. It always is the one with the jet pack on the back.

• 1:12:40Drew Afualo?

  It looks like the Ghostbusters.

• 1:12:41Speaker 04

  Literally, I'm like, you're, this is just to degrade me. Like you want me to never forget I'm a janitor?

• 1:12:46Drew Afualo?

  Hoover, I don't need this.

• 1:12:48Speaker 04

  A hundred, and they don't work. They like, don't pick anything up. It's like just for show. But that was what was weird about working at Dog Pound is it was kind of like, they have the real genders come in at night, but to like, you know, deep clean the floor and everything. But like, you're kind of the for show janitor. Cause when Vanessa Hudgens is working out, she needs to make sure you're like wiping something. It was like very bizarre, but it was my favorite job I ever had. Like if it paid as much as TikTok, I would still be doing it. Because it was so like, I'm like pretty introverted. It was like, I didn't have to talk to anyone and I just like cleaned all day. I did whatever I wanted and also like, I mean, ever so often someone would throw up, whatever. But it was so rare because it's only personal training. So it wasn't like that many people were there at all times.

• 1:13:32Speaker 02

  Let's be real, celebrities aren't eating enough to throw up.

• 1:13:34Speaker 04

  No, right.

• 1:13:35Drew Afualo?

  If they're throwing up, it's for something else. It's definitely not, yeah.

• 1:13:38Speaker 02

  They don't drink up food. They don't drink up like water.

• 1:13:40Speaker 04

  And they do kind of fake workouts. This is not, and I'm gonna, you know, they, you can really make a change at Dog Pound. I'm not trying to put them down.

• 1:13:47Drew Afualo?

  Just in case I want to go back to Dog Pound. It is really wonderful.

• 1:13:50Speaker 02

  If you make $600,000 a year or more and you want to make a positive change in your life, you should definitely go to Dog Pound.

• 1:13:57Speaker 04

  They, sometimes women would come in that were like Victoria's Secret models and you would be like, these are fake exercises. Like they'd film it on their phone and they're kind of like just stepping across the floor. And I'm like, this is not an exercise. It's kind of like when I did WeFit and thought I was gonna get jacked by like stepping on and off of a platform.

• 1:14:15Drew Afualo?

  And it tells you obese when you get on that thing, on the WeFit thing.

• 1:14:19Speaker 02

  Obese, obese.

• 1:14:21Drew Afualo?

  Okay, why do you say it that way? Why is the voice two octaves lower? And why is it announcing it? I can read. I don't need to fucking, you don't need to announce it to me.

• 1:14:30Speaker 04

  Devastate, yeah. So I didn't have to clean.

• 1:14:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, it literally would say obese when you get on it.

• 1:14:35Drew Afualo?

  I'm not even kidding. I'm not making that up. It's fucking off.

• 1:14:39Speaker 04

  Literally, I was eight. Like I weighed, I was like eight years old and it is screaming that at me. But that's how it is. I got personal training one time and she, she, he'd be doing like 20 squats. And then she did the like BMI, whatever. And then she took out a pointer, which was so unnecessary, a little pointer stick. Pointed to a thing two feet away from her. She could definitely point with her finger, just to a thing that said obese.

• 1:15:00Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. Oh, right. Well, in case you didn't, in case you couldn't read it here, it's also up here.

• 1:15:05Speaker 02

  Well, I feel like every time like you go to the doctor, no matter who you are, they're like, so technically, medically, you're dead.

• 1:15:12Speaker 02

  Technically, you're not alive right now. And I'm like, okay, well, I'm fine.

• 1:15:15Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:15Speaker 02

  Leave me alone.

• 1:15:16Drew Afualo?

  They're like, so you're weight. Do we want to talk about that? No. This is the eye doctor. I don't need to talk about that here.

• 1:15:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:15:22Drew Afualo?

  No, I just need a new prescription for my glasses.

• 1:15:24Speaker 04

  A hundred percent. But yeah, I loved being a janitor. You just kind of like, like, just kind of, and everyone is so, it is one of those jobs where it's like, not a bad job, but I think in people's heads, they're like, a janitor.

• 1:15:35Drew Afualo?

  No, totally. They like, they look down on it.

• 1:15:37Speaker 04

  Yeah, so they're always so nice. Like, they would see, and they would be like, oh, thank you so much. Thank you.

• 1:15:43Drew Afualo?

  That didn't feel...

• 1:15:44Speaker 04

  And I eat that shit up. I'm like, you're welcome, of course. But it was, it did get awkward because I worked up, I worked there for a long time and I, I like, worked there past when I should have worked there. It was hard for me to like, let it go. Because I was so scared to like, not have any income. So by the end, I was working like, one day a week. But at that point, I also was like, fully on TikTok and like, fully like, was being recognized at, like, at the gym. And that was very funny. Because I would be like, cleaning up, like, on the floor. I'd be like, vacuuming. People would be like, oh my god, you're a TikToker. And I was like, not very glamorous, huh?

• 1:16:19Drew Afualo?

  Just like you.

• 1:16:20Speaker 04

  Just like you.

• 1:16:21Drew Afualo?

  I put my pants on one leg at a time. Just like you.

• 1:16:24Speaker 04

  Exactly right.

• 1:16:26Drew Afualo?

  Uh, it says also, uh, for Jordan, that you were in a dodgeball league when you first moved to LA. And how was that?

• 1:16:33Speaker 02

  I was. I, I moved here and at a party, the first night I moved here, my best friend Lily and I were both drunk and we met this very nice woman and she was like, you have my dodgeball team. And we were like, incredible. And then the next morning, we woke up with like, a text that was like, here's the time that we start today. So we were like, oh, okay. Um, so we went, because we were nervous and we wanted to have friends. We both moved out here recently and, um, it was horrible. Um, as you can imagine, adults should not be playing dodgeball.

• 1:17:05Drew Afualo?

  No, never.

• 1:17:06Speaker 02

  It's just because like, when you get hurt and you're a kid, it's fine. You're so resilient. Your mom takes care of you. You're on your parents' insurance.

• 1:17:15Drew Afualo?

  Right.

• 1:17:15Speaker 02

  But I very quickly realized, as soon as I stepped onto the dodgeball court my first time, if I lose one of these veneers, I'm out a job and in $11,000 worth of credit card debt now. Like, there's no world in which that is allowed. You can't be breaking an arm as an adult in the entertainment industry.

• 1:17:35Drew Afualo?

  Well, it's also like, well, we're adults. We don't have to do this.

• 1:17:39Speaker 02

  100%.

• 1:17:39Drew Afualo?

  Most times when we played dodgeball, it was like by force because we're in school.

• 1:17:42Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:17:43Drew Afualo?

  And they made you do it.

• 1:17:44Speaker 02

  Well, and that kind of leads to point out that the people that play adult dodgeball generally tend to be bizarre. Everyone on my team was wonderful. They were so nice and clearly just, they're all comedians, people that just wanted to like have fun and get out. But we would play against other teams of adults that were very competitive. And I don't want to offend anyone here, but I think if you're a very competitive adult, you need to speak to someone. Like, something's going on with you.

• 1:18:08Drew Afualo?

  Like, to the point where it's that serious.

• 1:18:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm just like, don't you have like a job and a family? Like, why are you so competitive about this org game or whatever it is?

• 1:18:17Drew Afualo?

  None of this matters.

• 1:18:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, 100%. So I have a distinct memory of one time we were losing so badly to another team that was really into it, that the referee was like, you know what? No more points. Just for fun now. Let's all just have fun like normal. And as soon as he said that, a man standing across from me, I don't know, 50 feet away, 20 feet away, I'm not good at distance, who was probably like two of me stacked on top of each other, he looked in my eyes and he said, now it's time to really have some fun. And cranked up and underhanded a dodgeball directly into my crotch so hard that it knocked

• 1:19:03Speaker 02

  my feet out from underneath me. And I fell forward onto my face.

• 1:19:08Drew Afualo?

  Was it Captain America?

• 1:19:09Speaker 02

  Essentially, yes. Um, just a absolutely giant man.

• 1:19:14Drew Afualo?

  What did you do?

• 1:19:15Speaker 02

  What did I do?

• 1:19:16Drew Afualo?

  You just softball pitched a dodgeball.

• 1:19:17Speaker 02

  Yes, right into my coochie.

• 1:19:19Drew Afualo?

  And knocked you over like a bowling pin?

• 1:19:21Speaker 02

  Yes. Uh, fully knocked all the air out of my body. So I just had to lay there for a minute and then I rolled over and then finally I slowly got up and then I was like, what the fuck is wrong with you? I was like, what is the matter with you? Now it's time to have some fun. And then you throw a ball into my crotch?

• 1:19:39Drew Afualo?

  Not fun at all.

• 1:19:40Speaker 02

  Something's really wrong with these kind of people.

• 1:19:42Drew Afualo?

  We have two different ideas of fun.

• 1:19:43Speaker 02

  A hundred percent.

• 1:19:46Drew Afualo?

  My fiance loves, he, he has fun playing dodgeball, which is strange. But he, I, he's not allowed to play dodgeball anywhere near me or my family anymore because he has a problem. And I've said, there's something about launching projectiles that like really activates a prey drive in him. I don't, like his pupils dilate when he has the chance to throw something. Like sometimes he'll pick stuff up and he'll be like, I want to throw this so bad. And people have told me that's autism. I don't know. I don't know if it is. I don't know.

• 1:20:19Speaker 02

  In 2025, what is an autism?

• 1:20:21Drew Afualo?

  Honestly, and I have a lot of autistic things about me too. They diagnose me all the goddamn time. Every time I talk about anything. The few times I've talked about that, they're like, that's autism. I'm like, all right, well.

• 1:20:31Speaker 02

  It feels very primal to me. It feels like, you know what I mean? Kind of hearkening back to like, I'm a man. I should throw something.

• 1:20:38Drew Afualo?

  That's what I think too, but it, it ranges very differently. Like it's not always at someone. He just wants to see how far he can throw it. I don't know why. Like he's just like, there's something in me wants to like run and just throw this as hard as I can.

• 1:20:52Speaker 04

  Has he ever done discus? Is that what they call it?

• 1:20:54Drew Afualo?

  Oh yeah, actually we did that in high school together. We did shot put and discus in high school together.

• 1:20:58Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:20:59Drew Afualo?

  Uh, and I joined because my mom said I had to join another sport my, in spring. And I didn't want to like run. So I was like, mom, I'm going to do shot put and discus. Cause I'd just stand there and throw. And so I did it and because I did it that way, he joined too. Because he's like, oh, I want a letter two and I don't want to run. And so I've watched him throw the discus and stuff and shot put. Yeah.

• 1:21:20Speaker 04

  Far?

• 1:21:20Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, not, not bad. Jason is actually really good. When we were in high school, Jason actually set a record in our high school and got recruited like her senior year. But she'd only been doing it for like two months.

• 1:21:30Speaker 02

  Oh yeah. Your boyfriend was probably so mad.

• 1:21:33Drew Afualo?

  He didn't even think about fuck.

• 1:21:35Speaker 02

  What the hell?

• 1:21:35Drew Afualo?

  I love that. I love that. That's those lesbian arms.

• 1:21:40Drew Afualo?

  No, dude, she's dominating in that sport and then she was like, no, I'm straight.

• 1:21:45Drew Afualo?

  Now that she went to college, right after that, joined the rugby team.

• 1:21:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:21:49Drew Afualo?

  All the pieces were right in front of us.

• 1:21:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:21:51Drew Afualo?

  They were right there. That's so, yeah. I think, I commend you for joining the dodgeball team.

• 1:21:56Speaker 02

  Sometimes you put yourself out there and you realize you shouldn't have. You know?

• 1:22:00Drew Afualo?

  Not that way.

• 1:22:01Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:22:01Speaker 04

  Well, there's so many things in LA too, where it's like, you just can't do it because you're in LA. And I feel like rec league sports are, sports are one of them, and karaoke.

• 1:22:07Drew Afualo?

  Oh, you can't go to karaoke.

• 1:22:09Speaker 04

  Because anytime you go to like, oh, I'm gonna join, oh, a rec league soccer team, open to all levels. And you get there and it's, everyone is like an ex-professional soccer player. And you're like, this is so annoying. Like, go home. Yeah.

• 1:22:22Drew Afualo?

  When I first started dating my man, he was in a rec softball league. Uh, and he really loved playing baseball. He loved, he loved baseball, but he was so big, he played football for most of his life. So, he was like, I love playing softball and I just play with my friends and we have a good time. And I, he's like, do you want to come watch me? And I was like, if I have to, sure. I'll come and watch you, sure. Uh, but when he would go, it's whoever they play, every team they play would be like, just the drunkest, baldest old dudes in like their 50s. And they're, they're drinking, but they're taking the shit so serious. Like, they treat it like the majors.

• 1:22:58Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:22:58Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:22:58Drew Afualo?

  Like, the way that they're hitting the, the ball, they're like, foul, foul. Like, the way they yell at each other and shit, I'm like, oh, it's never that serious.

• 1:23:05Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:23:05Drew Afualo?

  If I'm ever that old and I'm doing this, lock me up.

• 1:23:08Speaker 04

  You go to karaoke in LA and someone always comes up and is like, an opera singer. And I'm like, oh, good for you.

• 1:23:15Drew Afualo?

  John Legend, what are you doing here?

• 1:23:17Speaker 04

  Literally, I'm like, but to me, that's so embarrassing to be like, I'm so good at this thing that I have to go to like spaces where people are like amateurs to show them I'm good at something. And especially singing, which this is maybe jealousy because I'm so bad at singing.

• 1:23:29Drew Afualo?

  Me too.

• 1:23:29Speaker 04

  But sometimes with singing, I'm like, yeah, I've heard it. Like, what are you gonna show me a new note that I've never heard? Like, I've literally seen like Cynthia Erivo sing and you think I'm gonna be like, huh! And especially because a lot of them, I'm like, you're born with that. So, I'm not impressed.

• 1:23:46Speaker 02

  I have a rude question. Why would a man play softball? Because to my understanding, no, this, and I don't know a lot about sports unless it's basketball. So, so this is probably like just a short coming on, on my part, but I'm kind of like, in the way that cats are girls and dogs are boys. I'm like softball is girl and baseball is boy.

• 1:24:11Drew Afualo?

  Yes, I agree.

• 1:24:12Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:24:12Drew Afualo?

  He plays softball because it's less dangerous.

• 1:24:15Speaker 02

  Oh, I love that.

• 1:24:15Drew Afualo?

  They use a bigger ball and everything.

• 1:24:17Speaker 02

  I love that.

• 1:24:17Drew Afualo?

  When they use the little ones, they're more likely to get seriously injured if they're playing. And based off the way they were fucking playing, I get it. So like, yeah, I understand, but that doesn't mean softball's easier. It just means the ball and the rules are different a little bit. They like vary slightly.

• 1:24:32Speaker 02

  Sure, but that's how you know softball's for girls because it's like a smarter sport.

• 1:24:36Drew Afualo?

  Exactly.

• 1:24:37Speaker 02

  They're really go, let's have fun, but maybe let's not be as hurt.

• 1:24:41Drew Afualo?

  Exactly. I asked the same thing. I was like, why is it softball? And he was like, oh, it's because you can't overhand pitch. You can only underhand pitch. And it's like, it's safety reasons.

• 1:24:50Speaker 02

  I love that.

• 1:24:51Drew Afualo?

  Because no one's a professional, because we're all here in the rec league doing it. You know what I mean?

• 1:24:55Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 1:24:55Drew Afualo?

  Uh, but yeah, that's not rude at all. I asked the exact same thing.

• 1:24:57Speaker 02

  I was just curious. Softball's such a lesbian sport too, that I was like.

• 1:25:01Drew Afualo?

  For girls. Me and Daye joke about stuff like that all the time. Like we were saying, cartwheels, girl.

• 1:25:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:25:06Drew Afualo?

  Gainer, boy.

• 1:25:08Speaker 02

  What?

• 1:25:08Drew Afualo?

  A gainer.

• 1:25:09Speaker 02

  What's that?

• 1:25:10Drew Afualo?

  Exactly. You don't know because you're, again, not boy. Not boy? Don't know. And I do think if I. Gainer's one of those like sideways backflips or some shit.

• 1:25:18Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 1:25:20Drew Afualo?

  I don't fucking know. It's something when they flip into a pool or some.

• 1:25:23Speaker 02

  That's something like, that's like, that was, yeah, that's like a fraternity thing, right?

• 1:25:27Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, that's like that shit. Remember, how old are you guys?

• 1:25:29Speaker 02

  I'm thirty-two.

• 1:25:30Drew Afualo?

  Okay, I'm, I'm gonna be thirty. Are you really twenty-five?

• 1:25:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:25:34Drew Afualo?

  Damn, I did not know you were that young. Oh, my gosh, I'm twenty-nine. Um, but do you remember in like, in college, around that time, there was like, that period of time where everybody was obsessed with those Red Bull videos? Where people like jump off cliffs and shit.

• 1:25:46Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:25:46Drew Afualo?

  Those guys doing those weird flips, those are gainers. When they do that like thing where they stay so straight and they fucking flip backwards.

• 1:25:52Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:25:52Drew Afualo?

  So I'm like, that's for boys.

• 1:25:54Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 1:25:54Drew Afualo?

  When, when. When girls like do, I don't even know, a standing back tuck, girl.

• 1:26:00Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:26:00Drew Afualo?

  When a boy's do like a jackknife into the pool, that's for a boy.

• 1:26:04Speaker 04

  Sure. I do think if I saw a boy do a cartwheel, I'd be like.

• 1:26:08Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I'd be like, you're not allowed to do that. Those aren't for you.

• 1:26:11Speaker 04

  In a good way, but a little bit.

• 1:26:12Drew Afualo?

  Those aren't for you. Those are for girls.

• 1:26:14Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:26:15Drew Afualo?

  So I was like, front flip, girl, backflip, boy.

• 1:26:17Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:26:18Drew Afualo?

  Stupid shit like that.

• 1:26:19Speaker 04

  Well, I can't do any of these, but.

• 1:26:21Drew Afualo?

  Me either. I have no skill whatsoever to do any of it.

• 1:26:25Speaker 04

  But that's tallness, I think. Cause when I was growing up, little girls would be like, I'm gonna do a backflip. They have no gymnastics trainer. I'm gonna do a cartwheel or whatever. And they were so good at it just naturally. And I'm like, that's cause we're so far from the ground. That's like plummeting my head off a cliff.

• 1:26:38Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I got a lot more, I got a lot more height on me.

• 1:26:40Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:26:41Speaker 02

  Yeah, I did gymnastics and tumbling for quite some time until I became literally too physically large. They were like, you're too big.

• 1:26:48Drew Afualo?

  That was me with cheer.

• 1:26:49Speaker 02

  Yeah, you get too big.

• 1:26:50Drew Afualo?

  I was, I was like, when I was first doing cheer, I was like a flyer. I was one of those ones that were like, woo, up in the air. As soon as I got too big and I had to be a base, I said, hey, fuck this sport. I'm out. I ain't holding another bitch no way.

• 1:27:01Speaker 02

  Less attention.

• 1:27:02Drew Afualo?

  It's either me or nothing.

• 1:27:04Speaker 02

  Yes. Yeah, it got into in gymnastics and tumbling where it was like, I was so much bigger than the adults that were spotting me. Became a safety situation for everyone involved.

• 1:27:14Drew Afualo?

  Get bigger people in here.

• 1:27:15Speaker 02

  No, cause gymnasts are this big.

• 1:27:17Drew Afualo?

  I know, they're so tiny.

• 1:27:18Speaker 02

  But that's the same thing. We were talking about this earlier, how when people meet us, they're like, whoa, you're huge. That's cause you meet a celebrity.

• 1:27:24Drew Afualo?

  Oh, girl. They're Polly Pockets.

• 1:27:26Speaker 02

  They're the smallest people you've ever seen in your life.

• 1:27:28Drew Afualo?

  I know. And every time I stand next to them, I'm like, oh my God. I'm like, I feel like they're like, ah, every room I come into.

• 1:27:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, they're gonna blow in. Why are they so small? What's going, but not even like, obviously celebrities for the most part are like thin in a way that's really toxic and psychotic.

• 1:27:43Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:43Speaker 02

  But they're also like, their bones are smaller than mine, right? Like there has to be some kind of anatomical study because they're, they're smaller than me in every single way.

• 1:27:53Drew Afualo?

  It's kinda like, you know how older homes, the doorways are smaller because people generally speaking were small. Not just, not talking about fatness at all, just like generally speaking, we're smaller.

• 1:28:03Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:28:04Drew Afualo?

  And I was like, now I'm like, what? Did I get massive bones on my list? Just like, I generally feel like just girth wise. I'm a lot like thicker than most people.

• 1:28:14Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:28:14Drew Afualo?

  And all the carpets I worked during award season, I, the entire time, I was like, everybody, I'm, they're like, I level with like, right underneath my tits.

• 1:28:23Speaker 04

  Why are they so small?

• 1:28:24Drew Afualo?

  I don't know.

• 1:28:25Speaker 04

  I will not do an influencer group shot. No. I'll sit this one out, thank you. Cause it literally feels like I'm like, the photos come back, it looks like I missed, what is her name, Miss Frizzle with her student? It's like, it's so insane.

• 1:28:39Drew Afualo?

  Giant.

• 1:28:39Speaker 04

  You got like, on school picture day, they're like, okay, get in the back, you're in the very far back.

• 1:28:43Drew Afualo?

  They're like, Kendall will take it.

• 1:28:45Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:28:48Drew Afualo?

  Literally. The last, uh, the last one I have about Kendall, it says, March 30th, 2014, you dressed up as the Jonas Brothers.

• 1:28:56Speaker 04

  Oh my god. This is, okay, so first of all.

• 1:29:01Drew Afualo?

  Are you Joe?

• 1:29:02Speaker 04

  No, I'm Kevin, of course.

• 1:29:05Drew Afualo?

  That is unfortunate.

• 1:29:06Speaker 04

  And this, I think truly, actually, don't know where you got that photo, but I'm obsessed that you brought this up. I think that was my first memory of being like, I'm gay, a hundred percent.

• 1:29:18Drew Afualo?

  You being Kevin Jonas, probably.

• 1:29:20Speaker 04

  It was a traumatizing night, to say the least. So my friends, Ellen Avery, were like, we're gonna dress up as the Jonas Brothers. I think it was very clear I knew I wasn't gonna be Joe, like, I just knew in me, like, I'm not leading man material. But I think that I thought there'd be more of a conversation around it.

• 1:29:37Drew Afualo?

  Not an assignment.

• 1:29:38Speaker 04

  Which I remember being, that was my frustration, like, I remember being in fourth grade and being like, why is there not more of a conversation? Like, I don't like the assumption that I'm Kevin. And then I remember there being an argument between the moms, cause like, one of the moms was like, well, my daughter looks like Joe. I was like, this is a costume party for nine year olds, let me, so they were like, Kendall's gonna be Kevin, Kendall's gonna be Kevin. And like, that hurt because obviously at the time, everyone was like, well, Joe and Nick are hot and Kevin's ugly, which was the whole thing, which he's not, but I, he, at the time, that was what people said. And so I was like, oh my god, I can't believe I'm gonna do this. And it was a birthday party for a girl on a rec volleyball team. Everyone went as Hannah Montana, like, every single person was Hannah Montana. We show up as the Jonas Brothers, and I remember my mom like.

• 1:30:22Drew Afualo?

  Genius costume.

• 1:30:23Speaker 04

  Thank you so much, thank you. And I really loved my outfit, like, I was really excited, I felt really hot. And I remember my mom, like, she put a fedora on me and then she drew curls down to look like Kevin. And I literally remember her doing my makeup and just being like, I know this isn't exactly what you wanted, but you're gonna have a really fun time. And I remember so clearly looking in the mirror and going, I look exactly like Kevin Jonas. Like, what the actual fuck?

• 1:30:52Drew Afualo?

  You're looking and you're going, they might have been on to something.

• 1:30:55Speaker 04

  Yeah, literally. And I remember my mom like holding up the photo of Kevin that she was going off of and being kind of like, not saying anything, but we knew that I looked exactly like him. And at the party, people like kept coming up to me and being like, you look exactly like Kevin Jonas. And I really did.

• 1:31:11Drew Afualo?

  And then your friends are like, I told her, I told her that, I said that.

• 1:31:15Speaker 04

  And I was so pissed because I remember, and you know, look, I can't hold this grudge because she was eight or nine, but she, the girl who was, Jo, got upset for some reason. I think she was embarrassed because I, if I'm remembering correctly, I kept wanting us to perform. Like I kept being like, let's go on the stage and have the DJ play a Jonas Brothers song. Because I knew how iconic it was. I was like, we're doing full drag.

• 1:31:35Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, at this point, it's high drag at this point, yeah.

• 1:31:37Speaker 04

  And she like cried in the bathroom. And I was like, well, now only Kevin and Nick are at the party, which wouldn't happen. Like, it was just like an absolute nightmare.

• 1:31:44Drew Afualo?

  It threw in off the aesthetics, the whole thing.

• 1:31:46Speaker 04

  And I just think I had a moment where I was like, I will never be kind of the it girl. Like, this is me. I'm, I'm Kevin, you know?

• 1:31:53Drew Afualo?

  That's not true. The fact that you're looking, you're like, I look just like him.

• 1:31:58Speaker 04

  I looked?

• 1:31:59Drew Afualo?

  I look, I look just like him.

• 1:32:00Speaker 04

  Identical to him. It was very, like, my face structure, because you can't go back, you're now like, when you take off everything, like, just our heads next to each other, very similar.

• 1:32:11Drew Afualo?

  I believe you.

• 1:32:12Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:32:12Drew Afualo?

  I believe you. I haven't studied.

• 1:32:13Speaker 04

  Because you can see it.

• 1:32:14Drew Afualo?

  I haven't studied, because, yeah. No, I'm like, I haven't studied his anatomy close enough, but I believe you. When I was a kid, I, I remember one time I wanted to be Neo from The Matrix.

• 1:32:24Speaker 04

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:32:25Drew Afualo?

  I've never, I'd never seen that movie. I just thought the look was sick.

• 1:32:28Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:32:28Drew Afualo?

  And I wanted like my hair to all be slicked back like that. And I was like, probably like, seven or eight. And I told my mom, like, I want to be Neo from The Matrix. And she was like, well, you've never seen that movie. And I was like, no, I know, but the outfit is awesome. And she's like, well, there's a girl in the movie, like, her name's Trinity, like, you could be her. And I was like, Mm-mm. I wanna be Neo or Neo. So she dressed me like literally slicked all my hair back. She like put like dark stuff in my hair. So it was really dark. And she gave me those little glasses and I had the trench coat and everything sweating my ass off because it was so hot. And I kept that shit buttoned to the top, that trench coat buttoned to the top for the whole night. And I had like boots. I felt like the baddest bitch alive. For some reason, I always dressed as men.

• 1:33:10Drew Afualo?

  I was like, I was, I was crossdressing a lot like as a child. And I like always had the most fun. And I remember walking around that party and my mom was like, you know, not a lot of kids might not know who you are. Cause I was so into it. I was like, people are, they have to know who I am. And then when I was like, no, I was like, I'm sure they'll know. I'm sure. Not one fucking kid knew who I was. I think they all thought I was like secret service for the president. And then, but every adult at that party was like, that's fucking awesome. Are you Neo from the Matrix? And I was like, you're damn right. I'm Neo. I always wanted to be.

• 1:33:42Speaker 02

  Did you like the adult attention?

• 1:33:44Drew Afualo?

  Oh, yeah. I love any, any and all attention. I'll take it. No matter who it comes from. Even like I've joked before about how like we had to do a wax museum project when I was in fifth grade and you had to pick someone you admire. And the person I picked was King George the third. I don't admire him at all. I just, I found him fascinating because he's like one of the worst kings in English monarch history. And like it was so concerning to my teacher that she called my mom. Like she was like, hey, I think maybe, you know, she should pick someone else. And I was the only girl who crossdressed, obviously. And then it was funny when I came, my mom was like, I mean, is it against the rules? And she's like, no, she did everything for it. And then she's, just let her do it. Who cares? Like my mom was always like, just let her do it. Who cares? Whatever. My kid's a fucking freak. It's fine.

• 1:34:24Drew Afualo?

  And then my mom like did my whole outfit. I remember like she gave me a tiki torch in the backyard, covered the whole thing in foil. So I had like a scepter. Oh, I felt like the baddest bitch alive. I was dressed like a, like a colonial man, like, and I had, she put like a little chain on a blanket and, and chained it to my back. And I was walking around, I was like, oh my God, I'm so awesome. And I remember we all had to go in the library and they were like, oh, if anyone wants to do their little monologue, you had to recite. Um, it's extra credit if you do it in front of everyone and if you do it with an accent, like if you're a British or whatever. And guess who was first in line, bitch? Me. That was for, I literally, my hand never went up faster. I was a. And then I was like, oh my god, this is my time to shine. And I memorized the whole thing, did it in a British accent, probably a terrible one.

• 1:35:08Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:35:08Drew Afualo?

  And they gave me a mic too, and I remember what, I was like, high off the attention. Everybody's watching me and I'm like, everybody's looking at me.

• 1:35:16Speaker 02

  I love that. I would say one of the most sobering things as an adult, though, is seeing a photo from childhood, where you remember that moment as a child and being like, I look so fucking sexy right now. Do you know what I mean? Like, when you're a kid and you're like, no one has ever looked hotter than me. I'm giving, like, peak Angelina Jolie right now. And then as an adult, you see a picture from that day or that time.

• 1:35:39Drew Afualo?

  And you're like.

• 1:35:39Speaker 02

  And you're like, uh oh.

• 1:35:41Drew Afualo?

  Oh, man. Yeah, when I was in grade school, one time I was like, we should join, we should do the talent show to my sister. And she was like, for what? And I was like, well, let's just do it, let's just do it.

• 1:35:51Speaker 02

  What do you mean, you're gonna get discovered?

• 1:35:53Drew Afualo?

  She does not get it. And it was like, end of the year talent show, so it's like, spring. And, uh, for some reason, we were really into the movie Thirteen Going on Thirty. And you know, they're super into the thriller dance in that movie. So I was like, we should do the thriller dance. Now, did we watch the actual thriller music video? No. We watched Thirteen Going on Thirty fifty thousand times and then tried to memorize what little pieces they show. And then that's the only part of the dance we did, is the part they do in the movie. And we dressed as zombies, and again, it's May. And so, like, it's not Halloween themed, it's not Halloween anything. And my sister was so mad at me, because she did not want to do it. And I was like, come on, it'll be so fun.

• 1:36:33Speaker 02

  Come on.

• 1:36:34Drew Afualo?

  And it was me, her, and these two other girls, and we, we like, put white paint on our face, like, we're zombies.

• 1:36:41Drew Afualo?

  Music's all low, I was like, if I ever find that footage, it's probably so bad. But there's so many parts of the song that we didn't know dance moves to. So we were just standing there going.

• 1:36:50Speaker 02

  But did you feel so good?

• 1:36:52Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I felt like I was on top of the world. I, you, girl, I felt like I was in Madison Square Garden. I felt like I sold it out.

• 1:36:57Speaker 02

  Yes, that's how I'm like, always trying to get back to that place. Because I feel like there's so many moments, like, I would like, do a middle school, the middle school play, and like, after in the parking lot, I would literally in my head be like, every car that passed, I'd be like, they're like, oh, there she is.

• 1:37:12Speaker 04

  She was so.

• 1:37:13Drew Afualo?

  She was unbelievable tonight.

• 1:37:14Speaker 04

  She was so good. Like, the adults are being like, where is she? She's gonna go far.

• 1:37:19Speaker 02

  I transferred to a new school in sixth grade and.

• 1:37:22Drew Afualo?

  That's so sad.

• 1:37:23Speaker 02

  I was like, I'm an audition for the talent show. So at the auditions, I sang an a cappella rendition of Suddenly Seymour from Little Shop of Horrors, which is a, is a great song. It's a duet plus chorus. Duet plus ensemble. And I sang all the parts by myself, being like.

• 1:37:42Drew Afualo?

  You did both. You did both.

• 1:37:44Speaker 02

  The man and the woman singing to each other.

• 1:37:46Drew Afualo?

  Did you do the makeup like half hour?

• 1:37:48Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, exactly. I didn't do, I just, I went up there and, yeah, no props, no costumes, nothing, just sang it out myself. I was like, everyone in the room was changed. After hearing that.

• 1:37:58Drew Afualo?

  They were so moved to that.

• 1:37:59Speaker 02

  And, yes, and then I got a call the next day that I did not get into the talent show because my talent was too sad.

• 1:38:06Drew Afualo?

  Oh.

• 1:38:07Speaker 02

  And then, upon talent show day, I found out that I was the only person who didn't get into the talent show.

• 1:38:15Speaker 04

  Cause they let anyone in those.

• 1:38:16Speaker 02

  Cause they'll let anyone in the talent show. They'll let anybody into a middle school talent show.

• 1:38:19Drew Afualo?

  I didn't know you had to audition for it.

• 1:38:20Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah. You don't, except unless you're me. But, and also, I was living in South Florida, so I'm like, the talents that were in this talent show were questionable. You know what I mean? There were some things that children should not have been doing. But my talent was too sad, so I couldn't be in it.

• 1:38:33Drew Afualo?

  But now, the joke's on them. Now look at us.

• 1:38:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:38:36Drew Afualo?

  Now, we get attention for a living, period. Well, thank you guys so much for coming on the show. You guys are fucking awesome.

• 1:38:42Speaker 02

  Thank you so much for having us.

• 1:38:43Drew Afualo?

  You're so funny. I feel like, I was like, we really are kindred spirits, all of us. Look at us.

• 1:38:47Speaker 04

  I know. Well, I was thinking halfway through, I was like, we gotta get some Jersey Mike sandwiches and have a movie night.

• 1:38:51Drew Afualo?

  Yes. So we have a Melissa McCarthy movie night.

• 1:38:54Speaker 04

  Oh, my god.

• 1:38:54Drew Afualo?

  Let's fucking do it.

• 1:38:55Speaker 02

  You actually don't wanna watch Spy with us. We're in sufferable to watch Spy with. We will not shut up.

• 1:39:01Speaker 04

  We quote every line.

• 1:39:02Drew Afualo?

  Every time someone comes to my house and they say they haven't seen The Heat or Spy, I make them watch both with me. And then when they suggest, they're like, well, let's watch something. I'm like, no. We watch Spy.

• 1:39:12Speaker 04

  Because every time we watch it, a new joke. We're like, we didn't even, we've seen it a thousand times. Like, I didn't even hear that the first time.

• 1:39:20Speaker 02

  But this is perfect. We'll all get together. We'll memorize all the lines.

• 1:39:22Drew Afualo?

  It's funny, right, right before we came out here, me and Jason were laughing about a quote from The Heat, like, when she's yelling at her family in her house. We were repeating the same line back and forth and laughing. As if we made it up or we're in the movie. We're not.

• 1:39:36Speaker 02

  That's the best part.

• 1:39:37Drew Afualo?

  But the community around the movie is an integral part of the movie.

• 1:39:40Speaker 02

  Exactly.

• 1:39:41Drew Afualo?

  It's priceless.

• 1:39:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:39:43Drew Afualo?

  Thank you guys so much for coming on the show.

• 1:39:44Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 1:39:44Drew Afualo?

  I fucking love y'all.

• 1:39:45Speaker 02

  This is great.

• 1:39:45Drew Afualo?

  Uh, thank you all so much for joining us on this episode. Thank you to my amazing guests, Jordan and Kendall. Where can everybody find you?

• 1:39:52Speaker 04

  Well, you can find us at Happy Wife, Happy Life, anywhere you get your podcasts. And we're also on YouTube. And then, um, separately, we just our names, our Instagrams.

• 1:40:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, just Google our names. And a bunch of stuff will come up.

• 1:40:05Drew Afualo?

  A bunch of stuff you don't want to see.

• 1:40:06Speaker 02

  Click on any of that.

• 1:40:07Drew Afualo?

  And they Google it and it's Kevin Jonas that pops up.

• 1:40:11Speaker 02

  And click on that.

• 1:40:12Drew Afualo?

  And just give him some support. He needs it.

• 1:40:15Speaker 04

  But yeah, we have a podcast where we just give relationship advice.

• 1:40:18Drew Afualo?

  And it's so funny and y'all should tune in. And you, and it's on Spotify, yes?

• 1:40:22Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:40:23Speaker 04

  Period.

• 1:40:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:40:23Speaker 04

  Look at that.

• 1:40:24Speaker 02

  Anywhere you get your podcasts.

• 1:40:25Drew Afualo?

  Period. We love that. Thank you guys so much for joining us. I fucking love you.

• 1:40:29Speaker 04

  Oh, we love you.

• 1:40:30Drew Afualo?

  You guys are amazing. Thank you all so much for joining us. Don't forget new episodes of the comment section drop every Wednesday. You can stream the audio on all streaming platforms, but the video is for free and exclusively on our favorite platforms, Spotify. Thank you so much to Jordan and Kendall. Thank you so much to all of you and I'll see you next week. Bye.

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