Comedians: Ed’s Funniest Friends

Ed's funniest guests shine in this week's compilation episode - whether it was Nick Kroll waxing poetic about his family puking tuna sandwiches on a deep sea fishing trip, or Jenny Slate telling us how susceptible she is to cults, or Jordan Klepper reflecting on Donald Trump’s desperate need for a hug. It's the best of the comedians of SNAFU, so listen, laugh and enjoy. See omnystudio.com/listener https://omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed Human.

• 0:04Speaker 01

  The scariest part of Halloween isn't the full moon or a chainsaw starting up in the distance. It's running out of Reese's cups. Because when you open the door to four princesses, six superheroes, and three Draculas all reaching for your Reese's cups, things can get scary fast. Especially when you were kind of counting on some leftovers. So this Halloween, buy extra. Because your neighbor Jeff dressed like a kangaroo? That's scary enough. Running out of Reese's cups doesn't need to be.

• 0:34Speaker 02

  Hi, I'm Steph, and I work at United Healthcare. When I think about United Healthcare's members, I think of my own family. My niece was diagnosed with an ultra rare genetic disorder. I know how hard it is for families at United Healthcare. We can make it easier.

• 0:49Speaker 03

  I'm Brian. I care because I know what it's like to not speak the language. It's not easy. Health insurance is complicated. I would say our job is to make everything easy for our UAC members. I work for United Healthcare. I'm committed to care.

• 1:04Speaker 04

  I'm not great at costumes, but I know which bottles to bring. Every Halloween, I stop at Total Wine & More before the party. Cold beer for the crew, ready to drink cocktails for the night, and a bottle of tequila for whoever wins best costume. Halloween plans come together fast, and Total Wine & More makes it easy to bring something for everyone at the lowest prices. I'm ready for Halloween. Are you? Get the party started for less at Total Wine & More. Spirits are not sold in Virginia and North Carolina. Drink responsibly. B21.

• 1:37Speaker 05

  Hello, Snafu-licans. You know, comedy is hard. Like, people think it's just riffing and making jokes, but sometimes it's like pulling teeth. I mean, some of us have literally pulled our teeth trying to be funny. But there are comedy professionals out there who are just consistently crushing it. And I have been lucky enough to rope in a bunch of them on this season of Snafu, whether it was Nick Kroll waxing poetic about his family puking tuna sandwiches on a deep sea fishing trip, or Jenny Slate telling us about how susceptible she is to getting roped into cults, or Jordan Klepper reflecting on Donald Trump's deep

• 2:16Speaker 05

  and desperate need for a hug. This episode, I have gathered up the comedians of Snafu, and I'm thrilled to share it with you. Listen, laugh, and enjoy.

• 2:34Speaker 05

  Do you have any major Snafus from your life that you would like to share?

• 2:41Speaker 06

  So I was away with my whole family. We were in, I think, Puerto Rico on a family vacation around, I think, you know, like Christmas vacation. And so my dad thought that a cool thing to do would be to organize a deep sea fishing trip for my mom's birthday. Because my dad knows nothing about what is my mom would enjoy. So they packed us, like, the hotel packed us a bunch of, like, tuna sandwiches. Because, you know, Puerto Rico is famous for its tuna tuna fish sandwiches. My family ranged from about eight to 15, four of us, my parents, and-

• 3:24Speaker 05

  And you're the youngest, right?

• 3:25Speaker 06

  I'm the youngest, yeah.

• 3:26Speaker 05

  So you're eight.

• 3:28Speaker 06

  I'm eight or nine years old.

• 3:29Speaker 05

  Eight-ish.

• 3:30Speaker 06

  And we get on the boat. We're going out to the deep sea, and the waves are horrible. Like, we later found out that a tanker had capsized that day in the Atlantic. So the waves were massive. We were just getting pummeled. And we all were sitting there, and the entire family puked our tuna fish sandwiches out all over, all over the place, except for my dad, who just sat in the captain's chair, gripping, like, the chair, turning, I'd never

• 4:11Speaker 06

  seen, you know, when people say, like, he turned green? Like, I've never seen it really since before, since, but my dad turned fully, like, like, a chartreuse. And all of us just absolutely ralphed all over this boat. And it was like, happy birthday, mom.

• 4:32Speaker 05

  This is, this is perfect. And the best part is, like, a tuna fish sandwich, a tuna fish sandwich smells horrendous-

• 4:45Speaker 06

  To begin with.

• 4:45Speaker 05

  Fresh, like a fresh sandwich right out of the deli. It's like, it's kind of a gross thing already. And then to eat it, and then to regurgitate it-

• 4:57Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 4:57Speaker 05

  Is a, is just an unthinkable stench. It's not ideal.

• 5:02Speaker 06

  No.

• 5:03Speaker 05

  Are you ready to jump in, Nick Kroll?

• 5:06Speaker 06

  I'm strapped into the captain's chair. The waves are big. I finished my tuna sandwich, and I'm ready to go.

• 5:15Speaker 05

  All right, let's do it. Let's do it. I hope, I hope this story is good enough to get you to toss that sandwich.

• 5:24Speaker 05

  So there's another kind of trip that I feel like you're an expert in that I just am not, and I want to know more about. Will you sell me on microdosing hallucinogens?

• 5:34Speaker 07

  I just feel like, it's, you know what, the best way to describe it is, we just took some LSD, me and my friends, when we went to these ice caves in Pemberton. And I would say the best way to describe it is, it puts an exclamation point on whatever experience you're having. So if you're outside, especially if you're in some sort of cool nature environment, we were in a glacier, in a cave underneath a glacier. So that was pretty cool. And it just kind of makes you really sit and appreciate whatever experience you're having. It adds a little giggle, too, to the situation, which is always welcome for me. I like to laugh and like to not be, you know, taking myself too seriously. But it's just an accentuation of life. And it kind of makes you have a little bit extra gratitude, which is one of the aspects that I don't think people talk about enough. It makes you really grateful

• 6:18Speaker 07

  to be exposed to the things that we're exposed to. Even if I go skiing for an afternoon with my girlfriends up here, you know, and if I take a microdose, it's like, I spend more time looking at the trees, looking at the view, looking at all the beauty that's surrounding me, rather than just, you know, kind of being in your head. You kind of, it gives you a release. So I feel like the whole world needs a microdose.

• 6:36Speaker 05

  I am very interested in this. Now, would you also advocate the occasional macrodose?

• 6:42Speaker 07

  I would. I would. It really depends on your personality and how much you can handle. But those years of me and the macrodosing, that was like years and years ago. Now, I like just a little punch. Like, I like, I like a little, an MDMA, they do, everything's a microdose now. So you don't have to be scared to do it.

• 6:58Speaker 05

  Right.

• 6:59Speaker 07

  And also, I would like to say, you know, not everybody gets along so well with drugs. I do. We have a good, working relationship. So I know what my limits are. I've done lots and lots of testing. So I know exactly what's going to work for me and what isn't. And in Canada, they have the cleanest drugs. So that's, so yeah, so I'm a big advocate of that. I think it helps a lot of people. And helps people, you know, in more serious ways than it's helping me. And I love sharing my drugs, too. I love giving them away. My whole tour is basically about me traveling around the world, handing out LSD to strangers.

• 7:32Speaker 05

  That's so great. You're just, you're like the, the little-

• 7:35Speaker 07

  I'm a Sherpa healer.

• 7:36Speaker 05

  You're the Pied Piper of microdosing.

• 7:39Speaker 07

  Yeah, I like to think of myself as a Sherpa. It's unexpected, you know, coming for me. But that's where I'm at in my life.

• 7:45Speaker 05

  I honestly, you're so transparent in everything that you think, feel, and believe. And I, I think in many ways, you are like an aspirational figure for a lot of people because of just how, just how much you, just how in touch you are with yourself, which I think a lot of people are. But then you are also just an open book. And like, you don't hold back when it's when you've got something like, difficult to say. And you also don't hold back when you have, like, these sort of joyful, fun expressions. And it's, it's awesome. So keep doing what you're doing.

• 8:26Speaker 07

  Thank you, Ed. I appreciate that. Thank you.

• 8:29Speaker 05

  So the coach itself was a loner from Axel von Farson the younger, who happened to be, this is debated, but many think he was actually Marie Antoinette's dashing Swedish lover. Whoa. What is documented is he sent her tons of flowers over the years. We have an artistic rendering of Axel here. Let's take a gander at this guy. Let's see this guy. Ooh. Oh, wow. Look at those peepers. Yeah, right? You mean, what? I'm not sure. I'm not sure. You're not buying it? What, I think the person that painted his picture did a pretty weird job.

• 9:06Speaker 02

  It looks like, he looks like, you know when sometimes people wear those George Washington masks? Like, like they have George Washington. You have your own face on the bottom and then you like put George Washington over your like, you know, where a raccoon mask would be. Those look like two different faces.

• 9:22Speaker 05

  Yeah, no, you're right. But what I do love about this, he's so smug. Like, he's so, he's like so smarmy and like, you can get like the sex appeal of someone like that.

• 9:33Speaker 02

  Oh, my gosh.

• 9:35Speaker 05

  You could get lost in those eyebrows.

• 9:37Speaker 02

  That's a look of placid, perverted, deliberate.

• 9:43Speaker 05

  Entitlement.

• 9:44Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 9:45Speaker 05

  Actually, there's one last little epilogue here. This is kind of fun, a little post-credit scene, if you will. Because I know you're curious about the, the last big old dangling thread here. What happened to our Swedish boy toy Axel von Fersen?

• 10:01Speaker 02

  For sure.

• 10:02Speaker 05

  Yeah, okay, well, he himself was killed by an angry mob when he was mistakenly accused of poisoning the Swedish prince in 1810.

• 10:12Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 10:13Speaker 05

  But, uh, yeah, angry mobs were a real big deal at this point.

• 10:17Speaker 02

  They're really scary. I mean, we, we had, we had one recently in our, in our nation. It's, it's scary. Yeah, they're scary.

• 10:26Speaker 05

  They don't generally make, uh, good decisions.

• 10:28Speaker 02

  No.

• 10:29Speaker 05

  I read somewhere, a quote, I, I wish I could remember who to attribute it to. Uh, "The intelligence of a mob is that of the dumbest person in the mob."

• 10:41Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 10:42Speaker 05

  So like the behavior, like an entire mob behaves as the dumbest person in the mob.

• 10:48Speaker 02

  Actually, I was just thinking about like, if for some reason, uh, Americans were able to be totally silent while someone rolled through town that they didn't like, that like, when I said we'd never be able to do it, like, I was fully imagining myself in the, in the silent crowd, not being able to stop myself from being like, "Who farted?" Like, just like, that it's so tempting to disturb, you know, the stillness. I think I would be the weakest, the dumbest person, um, in, in the mob. I'm the person that changes us from a cohort into like a freak out.

• 11:26Speaker 05

  Could you ever see yourself being swept up in a mob? I, I think it's one of those-

• 11:32Speaker 02

  Like emotionally?

• 11:33Speaker 05

  Yeah, I, I feel, because I feel like it's one of those things that, that we all think like, were, that were, it's sort of like cults, right? Everyone says like, "I could never join a cult." Like, "I would never fall for that insane."

• 11:45Speaker 02

  Oh, I would.

• 11:46Speaker 05

  You would?

• 11:48Speaker 02

  I don't think I would be in a mob because I don't consider myself to be like an impulsive person and I don't have like, uh, sort of, you know, like the switchblade of a temper that just like comes out. But I really love, um, friendly groups. I love cooking. I love it when people are like trying to help each other actualize their dreams and I like it when people like are dedicated to each other and a lot of times cults are like nonviolent. Uh, I used to have a stand-up bit about this actually, about how like I would totally get drawn into the, into a cult because like I like all the things that they do, except I don't like having to be naked in a group of people and I don't like having to do like oral sex to like a very, very elderly person who has a long beard, which I feel like they make you do, like the head of the cult.

• 12:32Speaker 05

  That is, that's, that's in the cult, the cult bylaws.

• 12:35Speaker 02

  There's usually some guy who's like, "You know what, actually, uh, a lot of the more interesting members of the cult are, are doing."

• 12:46Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah. But wait, why haven't you, you fallen into a cult then?

• 12:50Speaker 02

  Um-

• 12:51Speaker 05

  There, there are lots of them out there. There are lots of great options.

• 12:54Speaker 02

  Hey, I've got a strong family, really great friends that are like, "No, no, no, no, no, no, don't, don't go in there."

• 12:59Speaker 05

  Yeah, good answer. I also think that you are a inquisitive person and you're someone who, like, you're, you're not only, uh, very intelligent and, uh, and sort of like educated and you've taken it upon yourself to learn about the world and learn about people. Um, and I think that is some of the best armor against these kinds of group think or indoctrination of some kind. The minute you start asking questions, even with genuine curiosity, not even like an accusatory like, "Wait a minute," but you're just sort of like, "Now, hold on, why do you think I should, I should blow that old man with a beard? Like, what's the reason? Like, what, why are we getting what's?"

• 13:43Speaker 02

  Why would we have to do that, though? Like, you know, like if we're all gonna transcend and like, you know, have clear minds, like, why would we need to do that? Yeah, and you know what is a good place to start for me sometimes is like, I will ask myself or sometimes other people, like, "If this were a movie, who, who would you be? And like, what part of the story, like, would it seem like a good story? If this were, um, a parable, if this were like a religious text or a fairy tale, who would you be? Who would they be?"

• 14:16Speaker 05

  Yeah, who would they be?

• 14:17Speaker 02

  You know?

• 14:18Speaker 05

  That's a great question.

• 14:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, who would they be?

• 14:21Speaker 05

  I think you're on to something really quite elegant, which is that stories, movies, parables, the sort of broad, whatever gestalt of human storytelling, it is rooted in fundamental values, right? Like a sense of right and wrong. My kid loves The Lion King and so I've gotten very deep into the sort of like Lion King universe and, uh, and that is a movie where good and bad is so clearly, uh, delineated and bad is portrayed with Nazi symbolism, right?

• 15:00Speaker 02

  Totally, I mean, when he sings "Be Prepared," that is, those, those hyenas are doing it.

• 15:07Speaker 05

  Yeah, they're doing it. Hyenas are literally goose-stepping. In 1986, Bowsky was invited to provide a commencement speech at the University of California at Berkeley, Haas School of Business. Uh, and this is where that speech, uh, that was the inspiration for Gordon Gekko's infamous framing was derived. Uh, but it's not exactly the same as Gordon Gekko's. What he said is, "Greed is all right, by the way. I want you to know that. I think greed is healthy. You can be greedy and still feel good about yourself." This sounds like a cult leader. It's weird, you know what it has echoes of?

• 15:48Speaker 05

  This, this, uh, this, all this stuff emerging from both the Christian nationalist movement and Elon Musk where it's like, "Empathy is bad."

• 15:58Speaker 04

  Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 15:59Speaker 05

  This is saying the same thing in the sort of inverse. Greed is good, self-interest is good. It's very Anne Randy in that way, like, like it's just-

• 16:09Speaker 04

  It's very, uh, discard the seven deadly sins and move on. Greed is okay, it's fine.

• 16:15Speaker 05

  Right. Yeah, the Bible literally tells you that this is a deadly sin.

• 16:21Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 16:22Speaker 05

  It's one of them.

• 16:23Speaker 04

  This, this is destructive to you personally and to all of people. But if you want to have an elevator in your house, you gotta have a little bit of it.

• 16:31Speaker 05

  Uh, yeah, this is, I love the last sentence. "You can be greedy and still feel good about yourself." That's awesome.

• 16:41Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 16:42Speaker 05

  Okay, so all of this is going on and all of a sudden, record scratch. Just months after riding high, it all unraveled. On November 14th, 1986, Ivan Bowsky pleaded guilty to conspiring to file false trading records, which is a complicated way of saying insider trading.

• 17:02Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 17:03Speaker 05

  Basically. Time Magazine put his grinning face on the cover and dubbed him Ivan the Terrible, which is a little derivative, but okay.

• 17:10Speaker 04

  It's still better than Ivan the Bum from The Father of-

• 17:13Speaker 05

  Sure. Um, not, and not as good as Ivan Brokski.

• 17:19Speaker 04

  Right, that's right.

• 17:20Speaker 05

  One minute this guy is Wall Street royalty, the next he's a cautionary tale and the high-roller era was over. He is headed to prison. Do you think that repeated success always turns people into egomaniacs or, or like just disasters? Is it possible to remain humble?

• 17:42Speaker 04

  I think it's possible to remain humble based on, I think, how much you've acquired, uh, as a person before you've reached that success. For instance, I think a lot of people in our industry who find fame or fortune later in their careers tend to be, um, so much-

• 18:05Speaker 05

  A little more chill.

• 18:06Speaker 04

  And fully aware that life is fickle and it can go away. And yesterday I was doing this job and today I'm grateful I've got this one. But I think when you have it at a young age, and nothing against those people that get it at a young age because they are missing that, that sort of educational step, um, I think a lot of times they can come off as, as awful people. And maybe it's something happens and they turn a corner and they change, but you definitely see it in people who come from a certain background. They, I think it's just learning the value of, of things, for sure. But I think people can remain humble. I tell people all the time that, like-

• 18:44Speaker 06

  Friends back home or people who ask me if if I've worked with someone. They always want to know if someone's a jerk. I go, I gotta be honest. It's very seldom I run into someone. Who I really think is just kind of a piece of shit. Yeah, for the most part. Everybody's just at their job, whether they're wildly famous or not, and they're just trying to. Do the job and then go home and hang out with their family. It's just kind of our universal situation.

• 19:12Speaker 05

  Well, you know what that means, Rory?

• 19:15Speaker 06

  What?

• 19:15Speaker 05

  That means you're the piece of shit.

• 19:19Speaker 06

  Oh, my God, shit.

• 19:21Speaker 05

  If you can't actually see how much other people are a piece of shit, it means you're a giant piece of shit.

• 19:26Speaker 06

  Oh, fuck, I just thought they were so fun. I looked up to all of them.

• 19:34Speaker 01

  The scariest part of Halloween isn't the full moon or a chainsaw starting up in the distance. It's running out of Reese's cups. Because when you open the door to four princesses, six superheroes and three Draculas all reaching for your Reese's cups. Things can get scary fast. Especially when you were kind of counting on some leftovers. So this Halloween, buy extra. Because your neighbor Jeff dressed like a kangaroo, that's scary enough. Running out of Reese's cups doesn't need to be.

• 20:04Speaker 02

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• 21:04Speaker 04

  I'm not great at costumes, but I know which bottles to bring. Every Halloween, I stop at Total Wine & More before the party. Cold beer for the crew, ready to drink cocktails for the night and a bottle of tequila for whoever wins best costume. Halloween plans come together fast and Total Wine & More makes it easy to bring something for everyone at the lowest prices. I'm ready for Halloween. Are you? Get the party started for less at Total Wine & More. Spirits are not sold in Virginia and North Carolina. Drink responsibly. B21.

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• 22:02Speaker 05

  Now, have you ever heard of Harding's Ohio Gang?

• 22:06Speaker 03

  No, should I have?

• 22:07Speaker 05

  No.

• 22:07Speaker 03

  As a Michigan boy, as a Michigan boy, we don't, we don't give much respect to anybody from Ohio. So perhaps it's not my own ignorance, it's just my own prejudice.

• 22:15Speaker 05

  There you go. Yeah. So this was the nickname for some of Harding's appointees, basically because he'd hired or appointed so many of his buddies from his days in Ohio. And a lot of them were ruffling feathers and drumming up scandals from all angles, from influence peddling to selling illegal permits for confiscated government alcohol. These dudes were just awful, basically. So it kind of makes sense that Albert Fall and his oily mustache twirling fit right in. And yes, if you recall the photo earlier, Fall had a big ol' snot mop.

• 22:48Speaker 03

  Oh, God, handlebar.

• 22:51Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 22:51Speaker 03

  I mean, even even if we're besmirching the guy, I don't think we want that image in our head.

• 22:56Speaker 05

  I mean, it's funny, but it's gross.

• 22:57Speaker 03

  It's funny, but yeah, it's one of those things. It's like moist. We're like, okay, that might be the right word, but I don't want to hear it.

• 23:03Speaker 05

  So President Harding said at the time, I have no trouble with my enemies. I can take care of my enemies all right. But my damn friends, my goddamn friends, they're the ones who keep me walking the floor nights. Now, that's very godfatherly.

• 23:18Speaker 03

  That is, I like you really leaned into it too. The performance there was nice.

• 23:22Speaker 05

  Thank you.

• 23:24Speaker 03

  Yeah, my friends, just when I think about they pull me back in. Who? The Ohio Gang. I thought I made that clear.

• 23:32Speaker 05

  I do wonder though, like someone, you know, you look at these presidents, whether it's a Trump or a Barack Obama or somebody, you're like. How many good, like, close friends are they able to maintain at that, at that point? I would think someone like Trump is like so hard to get close to and so hard to sort of like feel. A sense of trust with, even if you're, if you match his core values, whatever they are, like, it just seems. I don't know, they're, they're so, their, their life is so public and, and it's so committed to the public eye.

• 24:06Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, I think like, yeah, the usage of a friend as somebody who you could truly be honest with and empathize with. And you could like be vulnerable with. I see people like Trump who sees almost everybody as like a means to an end.

• 24:20Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 24:20Speaker 03

  Everything has a loyalty test.

• 24:21Speaker 05

  Right.

• 24:21Speaker 03

  And even things, you know, not to besmirch any of his relationships, but those don't seem to be the most. Friendly and open. Those seem transactional as well. And you're like, oh, what happens to a human who doesn't have a. Like an emotional sounding board or compatriot that isn't tied up into your own personal success.

• 24:40Speaker 05

  Are you expressing, are you, are you starting to express some, some deep compassion for Donald Trump?

• 24:45Speaker 03

  Oh, my God, I stumbled on it. We've, we've created a monster. I just want to give him a hug.

• 24:50Speaker 05

  Yeah, that's what all, probably all he needs.

• 24:52Speaker 03

  Jordan, give him a hug. That's it.

• 24:54Speaker 05

  Group hug. I want in on that.

• 24:56Speaker 03

  Come on, man. Let's do it. Let's, let's break through this. Come on, you could be a better person.

• 25:02Speaker 05

  Part of what makes your podcast so fun to listen to, and I think, and also makes you such a great guest as on podcasts. Is, is you have an encyclopedic memory for quotations and citations. And I wonder, and I have the memory of a goldfish. Like, I can't remember any, I can't even remember the podcast I did last week. And, uh, and so I wonder, is it, is there a process to that? Do you take notes or is it sort of effortless? Like, what is the?

• 25:30Speaker 06

  You know what's funny about that? You and I have talked about that before because I remember it being meaningful, a meaningful compliment to me the last, last time we spoke about it. It is from effort somewhat. I am a big highlighter and I write things on my bathroom mirror. You get white chalk markers and I write, what's funny is I have all these quotes on my mirror, things that I try to hold in my heart. But every once in a while I'll also write like a joke idea.

• 25:55Speaker 05

  Oh, cool.

• 25:56Speaker 06

  So right now my mirror says like, what's wrong with right now if you don't think about it? And then like right beneath it, it says Plan B pill, but for food.

• 26:08Speaker 05

  They have that. It's called Ex-Lax.

• 26:12Speaker 05

  Oh, my God, that's so, I'm now I'm picturing your, your home is like, is very much serial killer vibes with just like writing all over the mirrors.

• 26:21Speaker 06

  You just have to own it. You just have to own that like.

• 26:24Speaker 05

  That's, that's awesome.

• 26:25Speaker 06

  I'm a crazy person that writes on my mirror, but it's not, it's me, Good Will Hunting, Jesse Eisenberg in the social network. And the, the thing we all have in common is we remember a lot of quotes.

• 26:35Speaker 05

  That's awesome. I, I really envy that. Here's a nice vintage photo of Teddy. This is not a childhood photo. I just want to be clear.

• 26:43Speaker 06

  There's gimlets just off camera.

• 26:45Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah, they're, they're trashed.

• 26:48Speaker 06

  Like, I don't know this story and I actually don't really follow the Kennedys. So I wasn't even making a Ted loves to drink.

• 26:54Speaker 05

  I, I think he's also just of a generation that, that.

• 26:58Speaker 06

  That's sort of where I was going.

• 26:59Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 27:00Speaker 06

  Like pickled onions and little vodka cups are nearby and cigarettes.

• 27:04Speaker 05

  This was my, I have photos of my dad exactly like this.

• 27:09Speaker 06

  Yeah, of course.

• 27:10Speaker 05

  And he was trashed a lot.

• 27:14Speaker 06

  Which, back then, like you just were like, hello, good to see you, Irene. You know what I mean?

• 27:20Speaker 05

  Exactly.

• 27:21Speaker 06

  Now, you're like, anybody at that level of drunkenness now, you'd be like, I shouldn't be here.

• 27:26Speaker 05

  Totally, yeah. Yeah.

• 27:28Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 27:28Speaker 05

  I don't know how they did it because like the hangovers alone are just like, I don't know. I don't even drink anymore just because I can't handle it. I don't, not because of, it just.

• 27:37Speaker 06

  I, I have an old joke where I was like in the Wild West, for example, you know how they're always drinking whiskey? I'm like, you're in the desert.

• 27:44Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 27:45Speaker 06

  This is why you're shooting each other. You're dehydrated. Like, get some water. You can't, that's how I feel about this time. These guys were eating red meat exclusively. Maybe a wedge salad covered in blue cheese that was like, what are you, a health nut?

• 27:59Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 27:59Speaker 06

  And like seven vodka gimlets and a cigarette before the meal.

• 28:04Speaker 05

  Yeah, I just imagine how constipated they were all the time. Just like not a lot of fiber in these diets.

• 28:10Speaker 06

  Past the age of seven, none of them had a glorious BM.

• 28:14Speaker 05

  No. So, uh, we gotta keep going.

• 28:18Speaker 03

  Because honestly, it's the only time I ever get any validation. You just reading off those credits made me feel good. I'm like, oh, wow.

• 28:24Speaker 06

  I mean, you're, I didn't even mention your book. You, you just had a, you just wrote a book.

• 28:29Speaker 03

  I have a book. You know, look, you and I are now, uh, authors. We are bestselling authors. Very exciting.

• 28:35Speaker 06

  It is very exciting. I'm very proud of us. I was trying, I was trying to think back to the origin of our friendship and it just, it, it falls into that huge basket of just. Wonderful people orbiting the UCB Theater in New York City around, what, like 1999?

• 28:51Speaker 05

  Right in that, that area because, you know, it's, it's interesting. There are certain people that, like Jason Menzoukis, obviously, we co-host this podcast together. I know Jason for many years, but Jason was not. Somebody that was invited to my wedding, uh, which is a crazy thing because we weren't that close at that point in our, he's definitely a friend. He didn't make that cut. He didn't make that cut. I was at your wedding. You were. And I was the whole time. I was like, where is Jason? Why? This is horrible. Meanwhile, Jason gave a toast at my wedding, as a matter of fact. It's wild to me that I talked to him all the time and he was somebody that was not, that was just not a close friend at that moment. Yeah, but it, you're so right in that, uh, I feel like there's so many people from that community that I,

• 29:35Speaker 05

  that they somehow like merged with our DNA at that time. It's like we, we knew each other when we were just comedy larva wriggling around. We were performing in an old strip club where sometimes you'd be doing a show and people would get up and leave and you're like, did I do a bad job? Like, no, they just thought they were coming to a strip club and were very confused for the first 45 minutes of the show. They're like, this is great, but when are they going to take off their clothes? I remember there was a basement, uh, that you would get to through a trap door, basically. On the most rickety wooden staircase of all time to get down it. And you would go down there and it was like a grotto from, from like 16th century Paris.

• 30:18Speaker 05

  Wet brick walls and dirt floor. It was a, it was a, a New York City catacomb, if you will. That's what it was. Oh, I mean, you would see the craziest stuff and it was only one way in and one way out. Wait, somebody was giving haircuts down there. Well, haircuts down there and on stage. Uh, yeah, one of the, uh, one of the, uh, resident teachers there. A legend. One of the originals. No audience, no audience. Really crazy. That should have been its own show, the haircut. Weirdly, it would have found an audience too. I'm sure of it. A hundred percent. Actually, more palatable than some of the shows that we did experiment with. Well, as, as one of, uh, the OG podcasters and one of, one of the greats in the podcasting biz. Thank you.

• 31:03Speaker 05

  No, truly, like you've, you've carved out such an awesome niche. It's been so cool to see. You do a lot of shows in the studio. You do a lot of shows live on tour. Do you have a preference? I think, yeah, for me, I think there's something really fun about when it's just Jason, June and I chatting with each other. I think that that's always really a blast and we're not playing for laughs, but when we do it in front of an audience, it's, I like the, I like the showmanship of it. I like, I like getting out in front of an audience. I like finding where the jokes are, finding what they find funny and kind of chasing that because sometimes also it can get almost so, uh, what I love about the studio is it's so casual

• 31:44Speaker 05

  that sometimes you are just having a conversation and maybe that's okay too. But like, you know, you forget like, oh, we gotta like, hit some more jokes or, or that one thing is funny. Like, and I didn't even think it was that funny. Well, are you ready? I'm thrilled. I'm such a fan of Snafu.

• 32:00Speaker 01

  The scariest part of Halloween isn't the full moon or a chainsaw starting up in the distance. It's running out of Reese's cups. Because when you open the door to four princesses, six superheroes and three Draculas all reaching for your Reese's cups, things can get scary fast, especially when you were kind of counting on some leftovers. So this Halloween, buy extra. Because your neighbor Jeff dressed like a kangaroo? That's scary enough. Running out of Reese's cups doesn't need to be.

• 32:30Speaker 02

  Picture this, you're the owner of a plumbing company descending into an 18 inch crawl space to hydrojet a sewer line. Don't ask. Oh boy, this is tight. I knew I shouldn't have had that extra helping of mashed potatoes last night. Now let's say your phone rings.

• 32:50Speaker 02

  Uh oh. It could be a lead on a very big job. I better get that. Or it could just be a spam call. Oh. But thanks to Ruby's call screening and seamless integration with the CRM system you already use, by the time you come up for air, your next job will already be waiting. Oh.

• 33:13Speaker 02

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• 34:15Speaker 05

  Railroad lines all tied it together. This was a blue collar boom town and as a result, European immigrants were pouring in looking for work. The population exploded by roughly 30,000 people in the mid 1800s. Now, on paper, Paul, explosive growth is great, right? Sure. But is it always good for a community? No. Or is it just an efficient way to stress people out? I mean, I know this from many years of playing the Sims video game. You can't build too quick. Uh, things happen. Uh, you know, you can't, you can't keep up. Supply and demand. Yeah, there's a lot of jobs, but then, you know, is there enough sewage plants? There are things, you know, things happen, you know? As, as someone who's known you a long, long time, so many of us have been trying to pull you out of SimCity.

• 35:00Speaker 05

  No, I gotta, I'm in the. And I'm not even in the Sims. I'm not even doing the people. I'm just doing the cities. I'm doing the city. I can't, I'm so worried about when Sim goes VR and you're like, just, you'll be so immersed. I gotta put this baseball stadium somewhere, Ed. Well, you know, rapid growth can often lead to corner cutting, as we all know, and, uh, boy, will that come into play. So, uh, watch out. I'm not like a tidy, fastidious person, but I do, I am like, I like, I'm crafty with like hobby stuff and I am very meticulous about, about sort of like things fitting and measuring properly. I'm also weirdly, and this is to my own detriment.

• 35:42Speaker 05

  I am weirdly obsessed with like clarity when people are speaking or trying to make a point with me. I get very frustrated if they're unclear or if they're like, Interested. Or if they just drops, forget to sort of give me a piece of context. I'm like, how am I supposed to know? What do you mean?

• 36:01Speaker 05

  Like, and it's, it's not rational or fair, but it's, Not just how you are. But I think it is, there is something about like, like the, like precision in communication is like incredibly important to me. And I'm not even that good necessarily. I'm not like, But I understand what you're saying. It drives me nuts when somebody's unclear. Yeah, totally. That's neat. That's neat. Well, it's different. Yeah, it is a weird thing. I mean, it's at least it's different from my life view. So that's why I asked, where you said like that museum sounded interesting. And I think for me, precision is the exact details of things being right.

• 36:43Speaker 05

  Never interested me. I love the in-between. I love the gray area.

• 36:49Speaker 05

  I love the, when things fall off the rails. If things are all going well and it all falls off, that's when I'm like, oh, excited. Yeah, I hear that. I've just, as even as a kid, I've always liked, I'm like, oh, it just, that's when things are fun for me. I feel that about you, Jake, and I will say it's an incredibly endearing aspect of you. I, I really, I admire that. I feel the same with you about yours, Ed. I admire that about you, truly. It might speak a little bit to how we approach comedy and storytelling differently. And I find acting and improvising with you to be like, so fun. Like you're one of the most present people to improvise with. I always, I sort of can't believe the things you're clocking because it's so in the moment and in the space.

• 37:34Speaker 05

  And, and it makes me, you'll clock the most random, specific things and it makes me laugh so hard. And I, I love, it's truly a joy. Well, I feel the same about you, but I feel, I, what's really neat about this moment is what I like about you is I think we're playing very different games. And I like being in scenes with you because I'm like, like, for example, my podcast is very loose. We take calls. We have no idea what's happening. Everything is meant to be a mistake. I came on your podcast with no idea what was happening. No idea. And I'd same for me on this one. And what I was like, oh, this is so Ed to me. Yeah. It's really interesting information where you've done a lot of work.

• 38:16Speaker 06

  You've prepared it. You have not bullshitted through a story. You have prepared and told all these different beats and you have moments where you're like, there can be an interjection here.

• 38:27Speaker 05

  Mm hmm.

• 38:28Speaker 06

  Where I was like, oh, this is an Ed formula and mine, we're here to help is such a Jake formula where it's, hey, you're here, we're recording. Yeah. Have a caller. Come on. What are they saying? I don't know. Hopefully something goes wrong and then we've got 25 minutes.

• 38:41Speaker 05

  I also love that. And, and this is, I'm delighted to be sort of plugging your podcast in this moment too, because it is so funny. And the premise, you, I think you told me like, a few minutes into the podcast, you're like, oh yeah. And by the way, we have to agree with the caller. Like, like, we have to take the caller's side in this whole thing.

• 39:02Speaker 06

  Try to no matter what, be on their team. So they're our friend.

• 39:05Speaker 05

  And what I love about that, and what is so Jake to me about that is how ludicrously arbitrary that is. It's like, this is just a, this will make things interesting. This will mess things up. Like this will just, this will keep everyone off balance. This will make, this will make everyone have to like, like, condition their answer in such a ridiculous way that you can't, you can't rely on your tricks and your tools and your, whatever your instincts. It's like, no, no, we're going to take, we're just going to make this arbitrary rule. And it just makes, like that by itself makes me laugh.

• 39:42Speaker 06

  Well, because if you were, if you were allowed to disagree, then a lot of us would come on and go, no, let me tell you how it should be.

• 39:49Speaker 05

  Sure.

• 39:50Speaker 06

  And I'm like, but if they're driving the train and all we're doing, if they're the star player on the team and it's our job to make sure they win, then you go like, their logic's crazy.

• 40:01Speaker 05

  Hmm.

• 40:02Speaker 06

  But I have to be with them. It's like being on the ship with Joseph. It's being Joseph, uh, Dombey's, you know, right-hand man and being like, okay, my man, I can't tell you no. I wish you had pants on.

• 40:17Speaker 05

  Mm hmm.

• 40:17Speaker 06

  But you want to dress up like a Spaniard. My man, me too. Me too. And then you're going, yo, this is Jose, I am Juan. And they go, this is bullshit. And you go, hey, Joe, that was not the best plan, right? That to me is so joyful.

• 40:37Speaker 05

  Oh, Jake Johnson, uh, another damn delightful hangout with you. Thanks so much for coming on.

• 40:45Speaker 06

  I feel the same about you, Ed. I love you, buddy.

• 40:48Speaker 05

  Snafu is a production of iHeart Podcasts and Snafu Media, a partnership between Film Nation Entertainment and Pacific Electric Picture Company. Post-production and creative support from Good Egg Audio. Our executive producers are me, Ed Helms, Mike Falbo, Glenn Bazner, Andy Kim, and Dylan Fagan. This episode was produced by Alyssa Martino and Tori Smith. Our managing producer is Carl Nellis. Our video editor is Jared Smith. Technical direction and engineering from Nick Dooley. Additional story editing from Carl Nellis. Our creative executive is Brett Harris. Logo and branding by Matt Gosson and The Collected Works. Legal review from Dan Welsh, Megan Halson, and Caroline Johnson. Special thanks to Isaac

• 41:33Speaker 05

  Dunham, Adam Horn, Lane Klein, and everyone at iHeart Podcasts, but especially Will Pearson, Carrie Lieberman, and Nikki Ator. While I have you, don't forget to pick up a copy of my book, Snafu, The Definitive Guide to History's Greatest Screwups. It's available now from any book retailer. Just go to snafu-book.com. Thanks for listening and see you next week.

• 42:04Speaker 01

  The scariest part of Halloween isn't the full moon or a chainsaw starting up in the distance. It's running out of Reese's cups. Because when you open the door to four princesses, six superheroes, and three Draculas all reaching for your Reese's cups, things can get scary fast. Especially when you were kind of counting on some leftovers. So this Halloween, buy extra. Because your neighbor Jeff dressed like a kangaroo? That's scary enough. Running out of Reese's cups doesn't need to be.

• 42:34Speaker 02

  Halloween's almost here and I've got plans. My first stop is Total Wine & More for cold beer, ready to drink cocktails, and a bottle of wine to share. And I know I'm getting the lowest prices. Get the fun started at Total Wine & More. Spirits are not stolen in Virginia and North Carolina. Drink responsibly. Be 21.

• 42:49Speaker 00

  This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed Human.