"Adam Scott"

Oh My Goodness: it’s Adam Scott. Black-out curtains, a ’68 Rambler, homonymous encounters, and “what is it about your wife that drives you crazy?” Sleep with your eyes open… on an all-new SmartLess. Bellissima!

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Sean Hayes?

  This episode of Smartless is sponsored by Google Book. So the other day, I wanted to make invitations for my dog Ricky's birthday party. And I've got three things open on my laptop. An adorable photo of Ricky, a picture of a birthday cake, and the RSVP details. Thing is, as much as I look like one, I'm not a canine birthday party invitation designer. That's where Google Book comes in. It's a whole new kind of laptop with a feature called Magic Pointer. I just click the photos and different elements on my screen, and boom, Magic Pointer designs a customized birthday party invitation for Ricky. Click anything on your screen to create whatever you want. Visit googlebook.com. Available to 18-plus users.

• 0:44Sean Hayes?

  Compatibility and availability vary.

• 0:50Sean Hayes?

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• 1:31Sean Hayes?

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• 2:16Sean Hayes?

  Shop in-store and online at paragold.com. Paragold: Luxury Lives Here.

• 2:26Sean Hayes?

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• 3:20Jason Bateman?

  So, listener, this is the portion of our show called "The Cold Open."

• 3:26Sean Hayes?

  Why isn't it called "The Hot Open"?

• 3:27Jason Bateman?

  Well, because it originated back in the old country.

• 3:32Sean Hayes?

  Jesus.

• 3:33Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, with refrigerator boxes.

• 3:37Will Arnett?

  Welcome to an all-new Smartless.

• 3:57Sean Hayes?

  Do you guys sleep with the room blacked out or the shades open? That's my opening topic. Hang on, Will. Sean's got some material. Go ahead, Sean. What should we say?

• 4:03Jason Bateman?

  What is it?

• 4:04Sean Hayes?

  I don't have material. No, I don't. Do you? No, I can't sleep with the... I have to sleep with them open because... Still rolling. Go back to one.

• 4:15Sean Hayes?

  I have to sleep with them open because I can't wake up when it's pitch black. It makes me really depressed.

• 4:23Will Arnett?

  Okay, I mean-

• 4:24Sean Hayes?

  I had a payday candy bar yesterday.

• 4:26Will Arnett?

  This is, oh, hang on a second.

• 4:27Jason Bateman?

  This is the second bit. He didn't want to lead with this one because it's not as strong as the first one.

• 4:32Will Arnett?

  One subject at a time. Shun, and now are you checking these off every time you hit one of these? Because I know you wrote these down.

• 4:39Jason Bateman?

  No, they're in the back of my head. But truly about the blackout thing, that is something that my wife really prefers. She likes to have total blackout in the room when she goes to sleep. She says she can't sleep with light in the room. And I'm still trying to figure out how she's been able to sleep with her eyes open all these years. Wow. Right? I mean, if your eyes are closed- No, if your eyes are closed, you don't need blackout curtains. That's what I'm saying. Your eyes are closed. And your eyeballs roll up behind, in the back of your head when you're sleeping, too. Right. But the thing is, I can't, but more than that, I don't want to wake up when it's, like, I don't know what time it is then. Yeah, exactly. It's real kooky to wake up in a blackout room. It is really kooky.

• 5:23Will Arnett?

  Yeah, I agree. I mean, we used to go to sleep as human beings when it got dark out. And we'd go to sleep appropriately at that time because there was no light. And then we'd wake up when it got light out.

• 5:35Jason Bateman?

  And you kind of peek your eyes open, is there, is there light outside yet? No?

• 5:39Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 5:39Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, it's kind of nice. It is nice to look out the window and see that the day's out there. That's what I'm saying, yeah. Yeah, it gets you going.

• 5:46Will Arnett?

  I'm an early, I'm a super early riser, as you guys know. And I like to go to bed early, too.

• 5:51Jason Bateman?

  So how has that been when you've now moved over there to New York to do your film? Which, by the way, I was thinking the other day, I'm a real shitheel for not having reached out to you and asked you how things are going thus far. Because you're right in the middle of prep, you're a couple of weeks out from shooting.

• 6:08Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 6:09Jason Bateman?

  You've filmed a little thing, a little bit. Let me just ask you publicly, how is it going? How are you feeling? Are you excited? Are you nervous? Are you, like, pumped?

• 6:16Will Arnett?

  No, I'm really, yeah, I'm really excited. It's been, it's been good prep, it's been excellent. It's been really, really good. And, yeah, we're right in the thick of it right now and-

• 6:25Jason Bateman?

  Can you tell us a couple of your credits before this starts?

• 6:28Will Arnett?

  Of course.

• 6:30Jason Bateman?

  And are you acting in this? Are you producing it? Are you directing it?

• 6:32Will Arnett?

  Let me go back through. So some of my credits as self.

• 6:38Jason Bateman?

  These are the talk shows?

• 6:39Will Arnett?

  Talk shows.

• 6:41Jason Bateman?

  Access Hollywood, Entertainment Tonight appearances.

• 6:43Will Arnett?

  Formerly known as Jimmy Kimmel Live. And so those are their own. And then Jimmy Kimmel. Also separate.

• 6:49Jason Bateman?

  So this is your big debut. Any scripted stuff?

• 6:52Will Arnett?

  You know what?

• 6:55Will Arnett?

  You know, I was looking at talk show appearances and I was recently, and I was like, I think I've done

• 7:02Will Arnett?

  like, all the different iterations of Conan's show, I think a total of like, close to 30 times. Same with Kimmel. I think I've done Letterman like six times. I think like, it's a lot of appearances on those shows.

• 7:18Jason Bateman?

  It's a lot of stories.

• 7:20Will Arnett?

  I'm loving being in New York, though, so much. It's been really, that part of it has been amazing, too.

• 7:25Jason Bateman?

  Will has something prepared. Go ahead, Will. What about New York that you're enjoying?

• 7:29Will Arnett?

  And I'm just saying, if you find yourself in Midtown and you're looking for some men's fashion.

• 7:37Jason Bateman?

  You're thinking maybe New York might be a fit for you once again in your life to live a little bit more full-time there?

• 7:43Will Arnett?

  Yeah, as you guys both know, I lived here full-time for over 20 years. And then moved out to LA and the kids were, the bigger kids were little and

• 7:54Will Arnett?

  it just worked out that that was really convenient and they like school out there and they still do. So my older kids are in high school.

• 8:02Jason Bateman?

  You're thinking maybe when they're done, you can maybe, yeah?

• 8:05Will Arnett?

  I'm gonna do a little.

• 8:06Jason Bateman?

  Because God knows where they're gonna go.

• 8:07Will Arnett?

  I'm gonna split some time. Exactly. God knows where they're gonna go. And so I'm gonna start to split my time a little bit between the East Coast and LA and the East Coast.

• 8:16Jason Bateman?

  Start to feather it in. And then in a few years.

• 8:20Will Arnett?

  Feather or is like you say, braid it?

• 8:22Jason Bateman?

  Braid it. Braid it. Yeah, yeah.

• 8:24Will Arnett?

  And then eventually go full, full-time East Coast and back here in New York. I really like it and, you know.

• 8:35Jason Bateman?

  That's great. My guest today appears in pretty much everything good you've seen on a small or big screen in the last 20 years. No stranger to the podcast space.

• 8:44Will Arnett?

  Try to sound sincere. Start from the top again.

• 8:45Jason Bateman?

  I love this person. Okay. My guest today appears in pretty much everything good you've seen.

• 8:51Sean Hayes?

  Period. No stranger to the podcast pace. Where did Will go?

• 8:55Jason Bateman?

  He's tying his shoes or something?

• 8:56Sean Hayes?

  Oh. I dropped something. He's co-hosted one about the band U2, as well as a separate one about R E M. His last name is also a first name, and he once claimed he can't live without protein bars or a water flosser, Jason. Today, he stars in one of the most anticipated second seasons of a show ever. Something I love. I loved him in everything, but this one I really love. That show is called Severance, and his name-

• 9:19Jason Bateman?

  Adam Scott?

• 9:19Sean Hayes?

  Brilliant. Adam Scott.

• 9:21Jason Bateman?

  Hey, Adam!

• 9:22Sean Hayes?

  Oh, my goodness.

• 9:26Speaker 03

  Hi, guys.

• 9:27Sean Hayes?

  This is very long overdue.

• 9:28Speaker 03

  I know.

• 9:28Sean Hayes?

  This is ridiculously long overdue.

• 9:30Speaker 03

  Can I just ask, can I just ask, is it too late to jump in on that blackout curtains? Do it.

• 9:36Will Arnett?

  No, no, no, please, please.

• 9:37Sean Hayes?

  We know you're a classic vampire. Let's hear it.

• 9:41Speaker 03

  No, I have no stance. I don't give a shit.

• 9:43Sean Hayes?

  Really?

• 9:44Will Arnett?

  Okay.

• 9:44Jason Bateman?

  What about Naomi?

• 9:45Sean Hayes?

  Good opener, good opener.

• 9:46Jason Bateman?

  What is Naomi like? Her sort of her bedroom lighting levels?

• 9:51Will Arnett?

  By the way, Adam, you don't have to tell Jason what your wife prefers sleep-wise.

• 9:55Speaker 03

  Yeah, thank you, Will.

• 9:56Will Arnett?

  Okay, just feel free to say fuck off. Okay, go ahead.

• 9:58Speaker 03

  Jesus Christ, Jason.

• 9:59Jason Bateman?

  Well, okay, just tell me what she sleeps in.

• 10:03Speaker 03

  I, no, I, blackout curtains in like a hotel, I can never wake up with the blackout curtains. But at home, you know, for some reason, they don't really have the effect. And that was about as interesting as it got.

• 10:18Jason Bateman?

  So wait, so you are using blackout curtains in your, in your home?

• 10:21Speaker 03

  Um, no, you, we do have, we do have blackout curtains now that you mention it, yes. But, you know, I'm always up early, you know, aren't you? You have kids, you're up early.

• 10:31Jason Bateman?

  Now, let me ask you this, because Amanda, Amanda got up early this morning because she went to a workout class with our eldest, kind of a cute mother-daughter thing. But anyway, so she's up early before I'm getting up, and I was reminded once again, she's a real heavy walker. She doesn't roll the heel to the toe. It's just, it's almost like she's got no flexibility in her Achilles tendon. So she's just jamming the peg of the heel down. Achilles. And she, she pops the light switches. Do you know how you can turn on a light switch so it makes no sound? Oh, yeah. She's never heard, it's just whack, whack.

• 11:12Jason Bateman?

  She'll brush her teeth and shake out all the supplements from the bottles and stuff from the bathroom. It's like, what is going on?

• 11:20Speaker 03

  It sounds like she wants you to wake up.

• 11:22Jason Bateman?

  Exactly. How about a nice little reach over and just a gentle rocking would be nice.

• 11:27Will Arnett?

  JB, it also sounds like you are intolerable as a person.

• 11:32Jason Bateman?

  I'm very tough to live with.

• 11:33Will Arnett?

  It's fuck, because all this time I thought Amanda was the problem. I agreed with you over the years. I agree that she talks a lot and she talks out of turn. She grabs everybody and whispers in their ear. She's always confiding in people.

• 11:46Jason Bateman?

  Yes, gotta talk all day.

• 11:48Will Arnett?

  You know what she does? She grabs you and she pulls you to the side.

• 11:50Jason Bateman?

  Totally.

• 11:51Will Arnett?

  Right, so she does.

• 11:53Jason Bateman?

  I love that. Oh, Adam's fallen down the hole himself.

• 11:55Will Arnett?

  But now I realize you're the problem. It's not her, she's an angel.

• 11:59Jason Bateman?

  Now you realize?

• 12:00Will Arnett?

  As you would say, a sweet angel.

• 12:01Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, sweet baby angel, yeah. No, I've got plenty of quirks, yeah.

• 12:06Will Arnett?

  Fuck.

• 12:07Jason Bateman?

  Adam, welcome.

• 12:08Will Arnett?

  Welcome, Adam.

• 12:09Jason Bateman?

  Thank you, thanks, you guys. So.

• 12:14Jason Bateman?

  Sorry I was late. No, by the way, the, you know.

• 12:17Speaker 03

  By the way, all of the, you guys were, there was a whole flurry of activity around you being, what? Seven minutes late. It's actually impressive.

• 12:25Jason Bateman?

  No, it's just unusual. If you're 60 seconds late to this thing, one of us will get after you.

• 12:30Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 12:31Jason Bateman?

  Will, Will, Will and I have wrecked each other's days, at least a half a dozen times.

• 12:38Will Arnett?

  Where we're like, we're like legit mad at each other and have to have a follow-up phone call four hours later at makeup.

• 12:43Speaker 03

  Because of like a four-minute thing.

• 12:45Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, there's like, there's like 10 minutes of vibe throughout the, throughout the start of the interview.

• 12:49Will Arnett?

  Oh, you're mad at me because I'm late? Well, I've fucking told you. You didn't want to check your connection before the start of the recording? Wow. Yeah, gets real.

• 12:57Jason Bateman?

  You know how brothers kiss. Sure. You know how that happens.

• 13:01Speaker 03

  Anyway, sorry.

• 13:02Jason Bateman?

  Wait, Adam, thank you for being here and I.

• 13:05Speaker 03

  Thanks for having me, guys.

• 13:06Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, and I'm glad you're my guest because I, as you know.

• 13:09Will Arnett?

  You know what, I'm glad you're his guest too, to a degree, but I saw the ads for, and I loved Severance. I haven't watched, I love Severance season one.

• 13:17Jason Bateman?

  So good.

• 13:17Will Arnett?

  First of all, out of the gate, you're fucking great, Adam. Severance one, so good. Love it, love it, love it. And I saw an ad for season two. I don't know if it was on, maybe it was online or something. And I saw an ad and I thought, how have we not had Adam on the show yet?

• 13:34Jason Bateman?

  Here we are, here we are.

• 13:35Speaker 03

  It's Sean's fault. Sean hasn't been able to hook him.

• 13:37Will Arnett?

  That was three days ago, I thought, I went through that thought process.

• 13:40Jason Bateman?

  You only, only three days ago?

• 13:42Speaker 03

  Sean finally booked me.

• 13:44Will Arnett?

  I know.

• 13:45Jason Bateman?

  And then, Adam, we don't need to mention the product, but did I hear your voice on a campaign a couple of days ago on TV?

• 13:51Speaker 03

  Yeah, maybe.

• 13:52Jason Bateman?

  Are you doing any voiceover work for a, for a?

• 13:54Speaker 03

  Financial?

• 13:55Will Arnett?

  You can mention, you can minch, what is it?

• 13:58Speaker 03

  Tax act.

• 13:59Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 13:59Will Arnett?

  Tax act.

• 14:00Jason Bateman?

  You have a very pleasant voice.

• 14:01Speaker 03

  Well, by the way, that's the, my first time delving into that, uh, kind of, and it is the best.

• 14:08Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, it's like, morons could do it. Isn't that right, Will? Will? Hey, Will.

• 14:15Speaker 03

  Uh-oh, Will falls asleep.

• 14:16Will Arnett?

  My screen froze, sorry.

• 14:17Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, that's what happens when you're a robot. You glitch out every once in a while. Go ahead, give us a professional grade, you fucking.

• 14:23Will Arnett?

  I'm not gonna give it away for free. Listen, my friends over at GMC, they make a product that's made here, that's American made, and if you like a truck.

• 14:32Speaker 03

  Right, but you've been doing it like at home for, like, you, you, you know, you've been, Will, you know exactly what you're doing here. Like, this is what you've been doing for a long time.

• 14:44Will Arnett?

  Oh, yeah. Yes, that, that is true.

• 14:46Speaker 03

  It is the best.

• 14:47Jason Bateman?

  Ask him what his favorite microphone is and the best cans to wear.

• 14:51Will Arnett?

  I mean, look, you wanna see something, this is.

• 14:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, do you have a different mic depending on?

• 14:54Jason Bateman?

  Oh.

• 14:55Will Arnett?

  Do I have a different mic?

• 14:56Speaker 03

  It's in a box. Look at that, it's beautiful.

• 14:58Jason Bateman?

  A quilted box. Ew, nobody cares about your microphone in a box. A mahogany. It's wrapped up like a precious dildo.

• 15:05Speaker 03

  Are you, are you kidding?

• 15:07Sean Hayes?

  It does look like that.

• 15:08Will Arnett?

  This is, this is, this is an old school microphone. It is the fucking Cadillac of microphones. This is a, or it's a, you know, a Yukon XL Denali of microphones.

• 15:19Sean Hayes?

  There you go.

• 15:19Will Arnett?

  It's, it's the Neumann U87. This microphone is, is the, made in Germany. Uh, I, I do keep it in this box at all times.

• 15:30Speaker 03

  Germany, we all know Germany, that's where all the good mics come from.

• 15:34Will Arnett?

  It is true.

• 15:35Sean Hayes?

  Everybody knows that.

• 15:36Will Arnett?

  It is true.

• 15:38Sean Hayes?

  Nobody knows that. So, Adam.

• 15:40Will Arnett?

  So, yeah, Adam, go ahead, Sean. If you wanted to ask, you go ahead.

• 15:43Sean Hayes?

  I just wanted to say, well, I wanted to say one thing and then I wanted to ask you something, which was, and I'm sure you know this, but I was doing my play Good Night Oscar in Chicago with Tramell Tillman. Yeah, Tramell, yeah. Yes, and Tramell said.

• 15:57Will Arnett?

  Bellissima. Bellissima.

• 15:59Sean Hayes?

  So, Tramell said.

• 16:07Will Arnett?

  This is a performance.

• 16:09Sean Hayes?

  Oscar.

• 16:12Will Arnett?

  Oh, Mr. Oscar, come to life.

• 16:15Sean Hayes?

  I love you, Tabasco. On the corner.

• 16:19Sean Hayes?

  I'm do, I'm gonna do it in Italy next. Sorry, Adam, this is, this is a great rehearsal. We're gonna record in a couple of minutes.

• 16:30Sean Hayes?

  Anyway, so Tramell comes to rehearsal and he's like, hey, you got, y'all gotta check out my show, Severance on Apple. And I was like, oh God, it's homework, I gotta watch another friend's show, right? And then, so I go home and watch, I couldn't take my eyes off. I was like, this is the best. And then I, every night at the show, I was like, oh my God, I'm in a show with the guy from Severance.

• 16:52Speaker 03

  Tramell's so good.

• 16:54Sean Hayes?

  He's Milchick for anybody who doesn't know, which now his nickname is Milchick.

• 16:58Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 16:59Sean Hayes?

  Um, which is great, but I want to just talk about Severance and get that out of the way because I love it. Um, what, cause when Ben Stiller was on the show, he, I think, I might get this wrong, but he said when he read the script, it was almost, he thought it was supposed to be a comedy or something? Is that right? Because there's comedy elements in it, but it's a tone like you've never seen before, which is so hard to achieve. Did you get that from reading it?

• 17:21Speaker 03

  Well, I think that he was sort of thinking a way into it would be like the workplace comedy that we've all sort of grown accustomed to as kind of its own genre. And he thought that could be a way in for audiences, like see these people working with their like banter and all of that, except none of them know who they are, what they're doing.

• 17:43Will Arnett?

  Right, yeah.

• 17:44Speaker 03

  And sort of that's sort of the way, and I think that's, and part of the reason he thought of me is because I've, you know, been in workplace comedy.

• 17:53Will Arnett?

  Well, I was gonna say, so as we all know, you were on Parks and Rec for many years, which was...

• 18:00Speaker 03

  Thank you, thanks.

• 18:02Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 18:02Speaker 03

  Thanks, Jason. You're not applauding, that's fine.

• 18:04Jason Bateman?

  I started it down here, just under camera.

• 18:06Speaker 03

  I see, okay, thank you.

• 18:08Will Arnett?

  Okay.

• 18:08Jason Bateman?

  Feliz semana. Bravo.

• 18:12Speaker 04

  He's saving the parks and the recreations.

• 18:17Will Arnett?

  So, so, but it is funny, you know.

• 18:22Speaker 03

  I love that he's in the back of the theater.

• 18:24Will Arnett?

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 18:27Will Arnett?

  But it also speaks to the size of the, just the breadth of this, this theater that you're in.

• 18:32Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 18:34Will Arnett?

  But yeah, you did, you did a very, a really great, very popular workplace comedy. And then you have to kind of shift gears. I mean, that one is a bunch of people who, they know who they are, but they don't really know what they're doing a lot of the time.

• 18:50Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 18:50Will Arnett?

  In Parks and Rec. And then you go to this other one, which, and what I loved about Severance early on was, first of all, is that you're, it's one of those shows where you're, you, not only do they not know what's going on, the characters, but you as an audience member are trying to piece it together. You're like, what's happening?

• 19:08Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 19:08Will Arnett?

  For me, that scratches an itch. I love that because it keeps you hooked. You're like,

• 19:12Speaker 03

  Right.

• 19:13Will Arnett?

  what's happening?

• 19:14Speaker 03

  Yeah. I agree. That's part of what I loved about it, too. And to sort of the gradual... It was a constant, like, negotiation of like, how much of the iceberg do we show? You know, from... First of all, season one, how far are we gonna go? And originally, the season was, by the time season one ends, it was gonna be way further down the line, story-wise, than what it ended up being. Oh, wow. So, it's constantly that thing. Like, how much do we wanna show? How much do we want the audience to sort of follow the breadcrumbs and all that kind of stuff? Yeah, yeah.

• 19:53Jason Bateman?

  And you being the protagonist, sort of the central focus, you kind of hold our hand as the audience through this odd circumstance.

• 20:06Speaker 03

  Right.

• 20:06Jason Bateman?

  And you've been the protagonist, you've been the antagonist. What... Do you like that? Do you like being the audience's proxy through something that is kind of difficult to manage?

• 20:18Speaker 03

  I do. And it's a completely different thing, as I'm sure you'd attest, Jason, because actually, early on, I remember when I started doing "Party Down", which is before Parks. And thank you very much.

• 20:33Speaker 04

  Feliz.

• 20:34Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:36Speaker 03

  Let's hear him in the back.

• 20:38Speaker 04

  They really love to party. Oh, you make me laugh so hard.

• 20:42Speaker 03

  Grazie.

• 20:44Speaker 04

  They like to party down so much.

• 20:47Jason Bateman?

  We've never done this bit before, and this will be the last time. But we're just gonna go ahead and milk it till it's a stone, okay?

• 20:54Speaker 03

  They like to party down so much.

• 20:57Speaker 04

  We party too.

• 21:02Jason Bateman?

  We'll be right back.

• 21:06Jason Bateman?

  This episode of Smartless is sponsored by Duluth Trading Company.

• 21:09Sean Hayes?

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• 21:51Sean Hayes?

  It's super soft and cozy, and I can wear it outside of the store and then kind of maybe even sleep in it, I don't care. Duluth, trading company for folks who work their butts off. Shop online or in-store.

• 22:06Sean Hayes?

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• 22:49Sean Hayes?

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• 23:10Sean Hayes?

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• 23:54Sean Hayes?

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• 24:19Sean Hayes?

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• 25:02Sean Hayes?

  Basically, Harvey is helping legal teams spend less time on repetitive work and more time on the big-picture stuff. This is how the future of agreements is being crafted now. Harvey, learn more at harvey.ai. That's harvey.ai. Harvey does not provide legal advice. Users should always independently review and verify any output provided by Harvey.

• 25:26Sean Hayes?

  And now, back to the show.

• 25:29Jason Bateman?

  You're doing Party Down, and you're a protagonist or an antagonist?

• 25:33Speaker 03

  Right, so we're doing, we're doing a scene early in that show, and we were just starting, and up to that point, I had had roles where, you know, where you're trying to like stuff everything into a couple of scenes.

• 25:46Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 25:46Speaker 03

  And so, I was doing this scene where Lizzy Kaplan and I were meeting for the first time and talking, and I remember the director, Fred Savage, took me aside after a couple takes and was just like, "Hey, man, you know, you've got all season, you can chill."

• 26:04Jason Bateman?

  Pump it, just easy, bro.

• 26:06Speaker 03

  Yeah, like, we've got all this time, and you can, you know, you're gonna be kind of, the audience is gonna go through the story with you, so you can just pull back and just, like, we were essentially just saying, "Fucking relax."

• 26:22Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 26:22Speaker 03

  Like, "Don't worry about it."

• 26:24Jason Bateman?

  Did that crush your spirit? Was that, was that shaming?

• 26:27Speaker 03

  Well, no, it was actually, it was like the best advice I'd gotten, but also, kind of looking back, yeah, maybe I would, in the moment, probably question everything, but looking back, it's like the best piece of advice because, you know, he's 100% right, and I'm sure he learned that lesson when he was like nine years old or something, but it's true, you can just take your foot off the gas a little bit, otherwise it's gonna be exhausting to watch, you're gonna be watching someone.

• 26:58Will Arnett?

  Well, you have nowhere to go, all that kind of stuff, right? What, what, you know, it occurs to me as you say that, Adam, I'm like, what, what's the best, can you guys, this goes to everybody, remember a piece of direction, a simple note or something that's always stuck with you that was a good one or a really bad one?

• 27:16Sean Hayes?

  I got a piece, I got a piece of bad direction once from, oh, gosh.

• 27:20Will Arnett?

  Don't say the name, but.

• 27:21Sean Hayes?

  Okay, I won't say the name, but he said, "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

• 27:25Jason Bateman?

  Whoa.

• 27:25Will Arnett?

  No, really? I think you said that before, yeah. And didn't he scream it like either across the set or from Video Village?

• 27:32Jason Bateman?

  No, he, yeah, from Video Village in front of 200 people.

• 27:35Speaker 03

  And saying that and then expecting you to like experiment and find.

• 27:40Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah, exactly.

• 27:42Speaker 03

  Jesus Christ.

• 27:43Jason Bateman?

  That was the direction. Also, but Jimmy Burrows once said, Jimmy Burrows, the great Jimmy Burrows, James Burrows. He said, I said, Jimmy, is it funnier if I like say the line and slam the fridge? Or should I slam the fridge and then say the line? And his direction was, honey, I don't care.

• 27:59Will Arnett?

  That's pretty good. Jimmy Burrows once, Jimmy Burrows once, not to me, but to somebody else I was doing a scene with. And, you know, we were on one of those rehearsal days and he's just, he's just got his podium on the roll, on the wheels. And we go through a scene and we're gonna move to the other scene, sort of down the stage a little bit. And as he's walking away, rolling his thing, he turns to this guy who's in the scene with me and goes, hey, clearer on the words. And the guy goes, which one, Jimmy? And he goes, all of them.

• 28:29Will Arnett?

  Kept walking.

• 28:31Jason Bateman?

  He is funny.

• 28:33Will Arnett?

  I fell to my knees laughing so hard.

• 28:35Speaker 03

  By the way, his book is incredible.

• 28:38Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, it's really good.

• 28:39Speaker 03

  It's so good.

• 28:41Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. He once just simply yelled to me, stop pushing. That's it? I was, yeah, I was pushing too hard. Which reminds me of the actually, actually, the most helpful note I ever got was very similar. Not to drop a name, but I was doing a movie of the week in like the early 90s on CBS with the great Katharine Hepburn. And I was doing a scene with her and she.

• 29:04Will Arnett?

  What a talent.

• 29:07Speaker 03

  She was our finest.

• 29:11Jason Bateman?

  She said, she said to me, she stopped in the middle of the scene. I was supposed to be crying in the scene. It's just me and her. And she stopped in the middle of the scene and I'm trying to squeeze these tears out. She goes, stop acting.

• 29:21Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 29:21Jason Bateman?

  And I said, like forever? Should I just?

• 29:25Sean Hayes?

  Quit?

• 29:25Jason Bateman?

  No, no, in the scene, you're just say it, just say the words.

• 29:28Will Arnett?

  Forever?

• 29:29Speaker 03

  Like forever?

• 29:31Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. Was this is like a like career pivot? She's like, she said, no, just say the words and she and she was right. And then I just said the words. Um, and uh, try to try to still do that every day.

• 29:43Sean Hayes?

  Love that.

• 29:43Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 29:44Sean Hayes?

  Um, wait, so about your first two names. Uh, so is this right? Were you gonna be Adam? I can't even say it. Quateraro?

• 29:53Speaker 03

  Cordero.

• 29:54Sean Hayes?

  Of course, it was Quateraro?

• 29:56Speaker 03

  Well, my mom's maiden name was Corderaro. And so I, I was like, well, that's too long. I wanted to, cause I'm part Sicilian. So I wanted to have like a Sicilian last name when I was in acting school to be more, you know, to sound like Al Pacino or Robert De Niro.

• 30:14Will Arnett?

  Yeah, yeah, of course.

• 30:15Speaker 03

  Right?

• 30:16Sean Hayes?

  Something with an O would be preferable, sure.

• 30:18Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 30:19Sean Hayes?

  So you got the Corderero.

• 30:20Will Arnett?

  Nothing wrong with an Italian name.

• 30:22Speaker 03

  Exactly. See, this guy knows what I'm talking about.

• 30:27Sean Hayes?

  Okay. So wait.

• 30:28Speaker 03

  So I shortened it to Cordero. And I remember being in the library at the acting school. I was in like writing Al Pacino, Robert De Niro, Adam Cordero. And being like, oh yeah, that looks, that looks right. That's cool. That's incredible.

• 30:47Sean Hayes?

  And then what happened? Didn't Claire, somebody had it?

• 30:50Speaker 03

  I don't, yeah, that's right. And it was with a Q too, Cordero.

• 30:54Sean Hayes?

  Ooh, I like that.

• 30:54Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 30:55Will Arnett?

  And then you were like, you were like, hey, give me the name of all the Australian pro golfers.

• 31:00Speaker 03

  That's right. Let's see a list.

• 31:02Will Arnett?

  Let's see a list. Adam Scott, that's the one.

• 31:05Sean Hayes?

  Wait, so how did you come up with Scott? What is?

• 31:08Speaker 03

  That's my actual name.

• 31:10Sean Hayes?

  Oh, it is? Oh, I thought, oh, I thought that was the other one.

• 31:12Will Arnett?

  Oh, fucking great research, Sean.

• 31:16Jason Bateman?

  Sean, that was his dad's name. Okay, sure. And so you, so when you were born, you just took your dad's name? Okay, got it.

• 31:22Speaker 03

  That's right.

• 31:22Will Arnett?

  Wait, Adam, and we've never talked about Adam Scott, the pro Australian golfer. Has that been an issue at all?

• 31:29Jason Bateman?

  Great swing. He's got a great swing.

• 31:30Will Arnett?

  He does have a beautiful swing.

• 31:31Speaker 03

  He's incredible, right? I mean, I don't play golf or follow golf, but I've certainly like.

• 31:38Will Arnett?

  Yeah, of course.

• 31:38Speaker 03

  Come up, obviously.

• 31:39Jason Bateman?

  You could do a lot worse.

• 31:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 31:41Jason Bateman?

  To have it, to have the name.

• 31:43Will Arnett?

  Have you ever met him?

• 31:44Speaker 03

  No, but we, I remember.

• 31:46Will Arnett?

  You got to.

• 31:47Speaker 03

  Way like 20 years ago, we did it. We did an interview side by side and something.

• 31:51Jason Bateman?

  You have got to.

• 31:52Speaker 03

  But you guys, he is, like you guys play golf and he's still like a great golfer, right?

• 32:00Will Arnett?

  He's very good.

• 32:01Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 32:02Will Arnett?

  He's very, very good. Well, I, I think it would be cool.

• 32:04Speaker 03

  Have you met him?

• 32:06Will Arnett?

  I've never met Adam.

• 32:07Jason Bateman?

  Sounds like you'd like to.

• 32:08Will Arnett?

  Scott, I like him a lot. He's very handsome, he's very stylish.

• 32:11Jason Bateman?

  Why don't you DM him or something, weirdo?

• 32:13Will Arnett?

  Like he's gonna answer me. But, but, but he, but I will say this, there, years ago, when I first got on that social media site, formerly known as Twitter, there was a guy who had my handle and by the name of Will Arnett. And it turned out he lived, he, he lived in the middle of the country and he had my handle. Anyway, over the years, people would tag him mistakenly, thinking they were tagging me, whatever. And he and I ended up following each other and we'd talk to each other from time to time. Really cool dude.

• 32:48Jason Bateman?

  Okay.

• 32:49Will Arnett?

  Years later, I'm in, I'm in, you're with me so far?

• 32:52Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 32:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 32:53Jason Bateman?

  This is fun. Go ahead.

• 32:54Will Arnett?

  And I went, anyway, I was in Vegas one time and he, and, and I ended up meeting up with him. We had, we, we took a photo together, got taken out. It was fun, meeting another Will Arnett. It's fun.

• 33:05Jason Bateman?

  End of story?

• 33:06Will Arnett?

  End of story, sure.

• 33:08Jason Bateman?

  What a waste of time.

• 33:11Jason Bateman?

  Hang on, so but on the way.

• 33:12Speaker 03

  I so wish I had a story about meeting Adam Scott.

• 33:15Jason Bateman?

  But you arranged to meet one another and you took a photo together? Is that what happened?

• 33:21Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 33:21Jason Bateman?

  Hang on dude. You arranged to meet the guy that shares your name and handle on Twitter.

• 33:27Will Arnett?

  He reached out to me because he said, hey, I see that you're in Vegas. I'm in Vegas. I'm also at Caesar's right now. I said, where are you? And then we went over and we're like, what's up? After years, why not? That's not bizarre at all.

• 33:39Speaker 03

  How did he know that you were at Caesar's?

• 33:42Will Arnett?

  Because I had, I had posted a photo.

• 33:45Jason Bateman?

  Inside the casino? It's illegal. Go ahead.

• 33:49Will Arnett?

  What, do you work for the casino now?

• 33:51Jason Bateman?

  I do not anymore.

• 33:52Will Arnett?

  With the gaming commission?

• 33:54Jason Bateman?

  So when you, so and then, okay, so wait. So now you're, he sees you walking towards him. You don't know what he looks like. And he goes, Will, and you turn to him and your eyebrows go up high? And then was there a hug or a high five? Or both?

• 34:07Will Arnett?

  I don't remember.

• 34:08Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, I'll bet you do, fucking boring weirdo.

• 34:11Will Arnett?

  I don't remember.

• 34:13Speaker 03

  How long ago was this, Will?

• 34:15Will Arnett?

  This is like 10 years ago.

• 34:16Jason Bateman?

  I'll bet you know the month.

• 34:17Will Arnett?

  Can you, can you, 10 years ago, can you imagine, first of all, A, Bateman leaving his house for any reason? But B, going out into the real world and doing anything with any other person? That wasn't a means to an end? That somehow satisfied his ego?

• 34:32Jason Bateman?

  If there was another Bateman Jason and he had like a script or something that sounded promising, I'd meet him.

• 34:38Speaker 03

  Promising sounding script.

• 34:42Will Arnett?

  What a script!

• 34:45Jason Bateman?

  I've got a one act.

• 34:48Jason Bateman?

  There's a cop named Sean Hayes.

• 34:50Will Arnett?

  You gotta meet Adam Scott the golfer. We're putting it out there.

• 34:52Jason Bateman?

  At a casino preferably.

• 34:53Speaker 03

  Oh god, I gotta, I gotta link up with him and take a photo. Sean, there's another Sean Hayes too?

• 34:59Jason Bateman?

  There's a cop named Sean Hayes somewhere. All right, so wait, I wanted to know when you first started. First of all, you're the youngest, just like me, out of all your family, right?

• 35:10Jason Bateman?

  And have you ever done theater?

• 35:12Speaker 03

  I've got theater stories, guys.

• 35:14Jason Bateman?

  Here we go.

• 35:15Sean Hayes?

  Good, good, good. No, but Adam, I wanted to ask you, though. You're the youngest, like I am, and your parents got divorced, like mine did.

• 35:22Speaker 03

  Sure.

• 35:23Sean Hayes?

  And, and, and when you're a kid, you can't vocalize, you know, what you're going through, you internalize all of that stress and stuff, and then it comes out later as anxiety. And is that what happened to you? Or did you learn how to none? You were like, oh, I'm glad they're divorced, I have no anxiety.

• 35:39Speaker 03

  Um, no, I'm sure it did. Um, I don't, I mean, I think, you know, I think when I, I was so young, like five, I guess, when it happened.

• 35:48Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, me too, five.

• 35:49Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 35:50Will Arnett?

  I mean, that's pretty young for it to be your fault, but it seems... Sorry, keep going.

• 35:56Speaker 03

  It was clear that it was my fault. And as I know, it was your fault as well.

• 36:00Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, sure, yeah. I mean, that's why I'm here talking to you.

• 36:03Will Arnett?

  But you still, but you still have contact with your, with your dad, right?

• 36:07Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, for sure.

• 36:09Will Arnett?

  Your dad did just split.

• 36:10Speaker 03

  He didn't drive off.

• 36:11Will Arnett?

  See you later. Right, he didn't drive off, and then, and like, the last thing you hear is like, "Go fuck yourself."

• 36:19Jason Bateman?

  And, and mother, mother still got both the eyeballs in her?

• 36:27Speaker 03

  Sean, I actually, as a fan of the show, I, I really do want to know, if you have, do you have the eye, like?

• 36:34Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, my sister has it, my sister has it.

• 36:35Speaker 03

  Oh, your sister has it?

• 36:36Sean Hayes?

  It's her turn.

• 36:39Sean Hayes?

  It's seasonal, Adam.

• 36:40Speaker 03

  Yeah. Have you ever posted a photo of it or anything like that?

• 36:43Sean Hayes?

  It's on the documentary. I brought it on stage to show these guys.

• 36:46Will Arnett?

  He brought it on stage, yeah. It was, you know, he graced us with, it was amazing.

• 36:50Sean Hayes?

  Incredibly distasteful, yeah.

• 36:52Speaker 03

  I've seen that documentary, and I, I don't remember that all up to...

• 36:55Sean Hayes?

  Just to keep an eye out.

• 36:55Jason Bateman?

  It's a loose use of the word.

• 36:57Sean Hayes?

  Keep an eye out for it.

• 36:58Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 36:58Will Arnett?

  Okay, we heard.

• 37:00Sean Hayes?

  Wow, all right.

• 37:01Jason Bateman?

  Wow.

• 37:02Sean Hayes?

  So, Sean, question three?

• 37:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:06Sean Hayes?

  Because we've gone through, are you, are you, are you emotionally scarred from your parents' divorce?

• 37:10Speaker 03

  Yeah, because I wanted to know that, because I have anxiety.

• 37:15Will Arnett?

  What is it about your wife that drives you crazy?

• 37:21Jason Bateman?

  And then your favorite of your two children, which one do you like the best? Take them whatever order you want. And then we'd love that theater story.

• 37:31Will Arnett?

  Have you ever had an emotional affair with a coworker?

• 37:38Jason Bateman?

  Well, I fact, I fact through the questions, Adam, didn't I? Didn't you get that fact? All right, so listen, you fell in love when you were a kid with acting because you saw Raiders of the Lost Ark is what I read. And I love, I love that mine was ET, but same era.

• 37:51Speaker 03

  Sure.

• 37:52Jason Bateman?

  And.

• 37:53Will Arnett?

  Where did, where did you, I don't know where you grew up.

• 37:55Speaker 03

  Santa Cruz up in the Bay Area.

• 37:58Jason Bateman?

  Right on.

• 37:59Speaker 03

  It's where they shot Lost Boys.

• 38:02Will Arnett?

  Oh, that's right. That's right.

• 38:04Speaker 03

  That's pretty much the end of that story.

• 38:05Will Arnett?

  Okay.

• 38:06Speaker 03

  Jason, did you, did you ever shoot anything up? They used to shoot stuff in the eighties up in Santa Cruz.

• 38:11Jason Bateman?

  I shot something in the back of my knee up there in a cave in Santa Cruz. My friend was going to UC Santa Cruz up there and, boy, it came on real fast. No, no kidding. There is a cave though up there called Steamer's Lane there in Santa Cruz.

• 38:28Speaker 03

  So you have been up there.

• 38:30Will Arnett?

  He was up there with Leif Garrett.

• 38:33Jason Bateman?

  No, I wasn't with Leif on that trip, but, and there were no needles involved. But there might have been a stinky skinny joint up there that was tough to stay lit.

• 38:42Speaker 03

  That sounds like Santa Cruz.

• 38:43Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. So the home of the slugs, banana slugs.

• 38:46Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 38:46Sean Hayes?

  And when, when did you get the acting bug?

• 38:49Jason Bateman?

  When you were.

• 38:49Sean Hayes?

  Me or?

• 38:51Jason Bateman?

  Was that for the guests?

• 38:55Jason Bateman?

  Go ahead, Adam.

• 38:57Speaker 03

  Boy, I guess it probably was, you know, seeing, just seeing movies when you're a kid and you're like, I want to, that's, you know, I want to do that. Like Temple of Doom and stuff.

• 39:06Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 39:07Will Arnett?

  But what made it, what made it feel like within reach? Like everybody's got their own thing where they go like, yeah, I'm gonna do it.

• 39:14Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 39:15Speaker 03

  It kind of never did. And that's why, like, it was, I know it's like in California, but it may as well be like on the different.

• 39:26Speaker 03

  Country or something like we were so far removed from like show business. It felt like going and being on TV or being in the movies felt like I'm gonna go to the moon.

• 39:37Jason Bateman?

  Right.

• 39:38Speaker 03

  They came and shot East of Eden and Santa like a mini series version of East of Eden in our town. And I remember they like put dirt out on the streets to make them look like dirt roads and had horses and horse drawn carriages and then the actors trailers. And I was like seven and I remember seeing that and just being alone away like holy fuck.

• 40:01Jason Bateman?

  And then you went to the American Academy of Dramatic Arts. How old were you when you did that?

• 40:04Speaker 03

  Eighteen.

• 40:05Jason Bateman?

  Was that high school?

• 40:06Speaker 03

  It was after high school.

• 40:07Jason Bateman?

  Okay, okay. And was that where was that down in Los Angeles at that point?

• 40:10Speaker 03

  Yeah, in Pasadena at the time.

• 40:12Sean Hayes?

  Oh, but that.

• 40:13Jason Bateman?

  All right, so then you so then you made a deliberate move to come down and and pursue it.

• 40:18Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 40:19Jason Bateman?

  And did you drive? It was a classic like drive down there with a bunch of shit strapped to the roof.

• 40:24Speaker 03

  Bunch of shit strapped to the roof of my sixty eight Rambler. And boy, what a what a hard career to start. Jesus Christ.

• 40:35Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 40:36Speaker 03

  Yeah. Just like coming in cold and not knowing a soul.

• 40:39Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. Sean tried to do that. Didn't everything blew off the roof, didn't it?

• 40:43Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, me and my sister drove me home from college.

• 40:45Speaker 03

  Did that really happen?

• 40:46Sean Hayes?

  It really did happen. We were super stoned driving home.

• 40:49Jason Bateman?

  Didn't want to take that as a sign and hook you.

• 40:52Sean Hayes?

  No, because we looked in the rearview mirror. We were singing songs. We both just smoked pot. This is we were both eighteen, whatever around eighteen nineteen and or no, out of college, twenty, twenty one, twenty two. And we just saw all the.

• 41:04Will Arnett?

  Statue of limitations here, one second.

• 41:06Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 41:07Will Arnett?

  You're probably fine.

• 41:09Sean Hayes?

  And in the rearview mirror, we saw my clothes flying out. We're just like, do you want to turn back? And my sister's like, nah, I go, me neither.

• 41:15Jason Bateman?

  No way you kept.

• 41:15Sean Hayes?

  Clothes on the highway.

• 41:18Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 41:18Sean Hayes?

  But anyway.

• 41:19Speaker 03

  Well, strapping stuff to the roof is like not, you know, and when you're like twenty, you're not gonna do a good job. Strapping anything anywhere. Yeah.

• 41:29Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 41:29Will Arnett?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 41:30Sean Hayes?

  You don't realize the science.

• 41:31Will Arnett?

  And you're at that point, you're like, fuck it, I can buy short shorts anywhere. I'll just get a bunch of different, right? So, so you, but you move here and then, and then you move to, to Los Angeles and then you're like, uh, you go to the American Academy and then you're done with that and it's like, okay, as you said, this is a tough way to start. You're like, all right.

• 41:54Speaker 03

  Yeah, dude.

• 41:55Will Arnett?

  Where do we go now?

• 41:56Speaker 03

  Was it commercials first? It was background work first. I just moved from past, from school, I moved to Hollywood and just started like going and trying to do whatever and didn't know anyone and,

• 42:11Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 42:12Speaker 03

  and, uh, and did a lot of background work and then did, got like a guest spot on something and then got a little agent and then just sort of, you know. Yeah.

• 42:24Speaker 03

  We'll be right back.

• 42:27Sean Hayes?

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• 43:09Sean Hayes?

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• 43:31Sean Hayes?

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• 44:14Sean Hayes?

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• 44:37Sean Hayes?

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• 45:14Sean Hayes?

  And back to the show.

• 45:17Sean Hayes?

  What was the first thing where it was like, oh, this is going to give me a little bit of capital that I can maybe use for a couple of jobs? Like, what was the first kind of big thing?

• 45:27Speaker 03

  I mean, I think part of the self-delusion you need in order to survive, you think that every time you get anything, you're like, oh, fuck, okay, now. But it turned out that I didn't really have a career until like 15 years later.

• 45:47Sean Hayes?

  And what was that? What was the thing?

• 45:49Speaker 03

  That was like, it was like this period of time where it was like... Parks, Step Brothers, Party Down, like this period of like three years where these things all happened.

• 46:00Jason Bateman?

  Oh, I see. Yeah, well, you were, you were, you were definitely a working actor that I was certainly well aware of before those three things happened. But you're saying those three things kind of put you in another category, or maybe you weren't really auditioning anymore and people, you had some incoming calls, yeah?

• 46:14Speaker 03

  A, a bit. It was just, I remember when that started happening and I remember getting some incoming phone calls from like Mike and Puller, like, hey, do you wanna maybe? And just being like, oh, this is what it's like to actually have something going. I thought when I did Murder One, I was on top of the world.

• 46:36Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 46:37Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 46:38Speaker 04

  I didn't care for it.

• 46:46Jason Bateman?

  Adam, but I thought this was really cool. When you were 14, like, cause Will was talking about at the top about like doing Conan so many times and Jimmy Kimmel and all those shows. And you were obsessed with Letterman, which I loved. I was too as a kid. And how did you, when you were 14, talk about that, when you were 14, you went to, how did you coerce your parents in letting you go to New York to go, you went to a taping or something?

• 47:08Speaker 03

  Well, we went to, we went to, we were on like a family trip and I was just like, let's go to 30 Rock so I can get a Letterman t-shirt. And we were there, didn't even think about doing the tour or anything. We were just at the gift shop and my brother and I saw Chris Elliott walk by and we were like, oh, holy shit. And we just chased him down and he stopped and talked to us for like 20 minutes. It was amazing.

• 47:32Will Arnett?

  No way.

• 47:33Jason Bateman?

  That's cool.

• 47:34Will Arnett?

  It was a great Chris Elliott, the great, those Chris Elliott bits back from, from Letterman were unbelievable.

• 47:41Jason Bateman?

  So good. And then what was the name of the, of the old man that would always be on the show? Biff Henderson? No, no, no.

• 47:47Will Arnett?

  No, no, no.

• 47:48Speaker 03

  Oh, Larry Bud Melman?

• 47:50Jason Bateman?

  Larry Bud Melman. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Whose real name was?

• 47:54Speaker 03

  DeForest Kelly. No, no, no, that's a guy on Star Trek.

• 47:57Jason Bateman?

  No, no, no, no, but you're, you're, you're, you're right in the ballpark.

• 48:00Speaker 03

  Something.

• 48:01Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 48:02Speaker 03

  I remember when we talked to- To Chris Elliott, he was talking to us for a while and then he was like, I gotta go, but you guys should watch the show tonight. I'm gonna, I'm gonna try something new out. And it was the first night he did his, remember he did Marlon, this really weird Marlon Brando impression?

• 48:17Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 48:18Speaker 03

  Anyway, that was what that was.

• 48:19Sean Hayes?

  Uh, Calvert de Forest. There it is.

• 48:22Speaker 03

  Calvert de Forest.

• 48:23Sean Hayes?

  So, uh, but, but what was that like? Because, you know, I think all of us, when you're, when you're like Jason, always talked about the first time he did The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, how like?

• 48:33Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 48:33Sean Hayes?

  That you're like, oh God, I'm on that thing that all the other famous people are on, so I must be in that, right? So having been obsessed with Letterman when you were growing up, I mean, I assume you were on, yeah, many times.

• 48:44Speaker 03

  Yes, I, I got, I did it twice before he, he finished. Yeah. I mean, that was, doing Letterman, as I'm sure it was for you guys too, was a major like life moment.

• 48:55Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 48:55Speaker 03

  That's it. That was it.

• 48:57Sean Hayes?

  Totally. Petrifying, petrifying.

• 48:59Speaker 03

  It was everything. I had my brother come out and so he was in the audience and, I mean, you know, it's just the best. And he, he was so cool and hilarious and I just couldn't believe it. I'm sure I was nervous and terrible, but it was, it was really something.

• 49:17Sean Hayes?

  Um, wait, so why was your nick, why was your nickname Spanky? Here we go. Wasn't your nickname Spanky when you were a kid?

• 49:25Speaker 03

  Well, it was when I was in, in Little League, I had, they called me, I was a heavier kid for a few years and I was on the baseball team. And so the kids called me Spanky because this kid on, uh,

• 49:40Sean Hayes?

  Oh, from The Little Rascals, yeah.

• 49:42Speaker 03

  Little Rascals, the, the heavy kid on Little Rascals.

• 49:44Sean Hayes?

  You know what? I had the opposite problem because, you know, I, I grew up like, um, so skinny. I could not gain weight. I would drink milkshakes and go work out with my brother and eat burgers and like, I couldn't, I couldn't gain weight. I just.

• 49:58Speaker 03

  Sure made up for it.

• 49:59Sean Hayes?

  You fixed it.

• 50:02Sean Hayes?

  Sorry, walked right into that.

• 50:03Will Arnett?

  One in first.

• 50:04Speaker 03

  You sure did.

• 50:06Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, but it's so funny because people, you know, make fun of fat kids all the time when you're in school, all the other kids are mean. But like, when I was a kid, people used to make fun of me for being so skinny. People were like, well, you know, it was just skinny shame.

• 50:19Will Arnett?

  What would you give to have people make fun of you for being skinny now?

• 50:24Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 50:25Speaker 03

  A hundred percent.

• 50:26Sean Hayes?

  And then you played.

• 50:26Speaker 03

  But the thing is, is back then, the kids were all calling me Spanky, but then eventually the coach started calling me Spanky as well, which was so fucked up.

• 50:35Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, that's good. Wait, so then you married, so your wife Naomi from my sister Tracy Naomi Sap, did you say Sablon or Sap? Sablon, right?

• 50:45Speaker 03

  It's Scott, but yeah, her maiden name was Sablon.

• 50:48Sean Hayes?

  When you met her, that was her name, and she was a producer. And how did you meet her? On a show?

• 50:55Speaker 03

  We met, no, we met at a bar, at the Cat in the Fiddle on.

• 51:00Sean Hayes?

  I love Cat and Fiddle.

• 51:02Speaker 03

  Remember that place?

• 51:02Sean Hayes?

  Yes, I used to go all the time.

• 51:03Speaker 03

  The outside so you could smoke.

• 51:06Sean Hayes?

  Yes, I used to go all the time.

• 51:07Speaker 03

  That was the best.

• 51:08Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 51:08Speaker 03

  We met there in like 1998.

• 51:10Sean Hayes?

  Wow, that's crazy. I was there, we probably ran into each other and didn't know it.

• 51:14Speaker 03

  I would go there all the time.

• 51:16Sean Hayes?

  Same.

• 51:16Speaker 03

  Like that and the Dragonfly, do you remember?

• 51:19Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, I would go to Cat and Fiddle.

• 51:23Speaker 03

  Isn't that when you had a candle on your dashboard?

• 51:25Sean Hayes?

  Oh, yeah.

• 51:28Sean Hayes?

  This is why I don't go out anymore, you know, these guys make fun of me, but I've fixed my ways. But Adam, I used to go to Cat and Fiddle all the time with Julie Bowen, and that's when we'd make out and stuff. But anyway, so, and then, but you, so it was.

• 51:41Speaker 03

  Julie Bowen, everybody.

• 51:42Will Arnett?

  Julie Bowen.

• 51:42Sean Hayes?

  Julie Bowen, she's the best, I love her. You used to have family karaoke nights, and you love Billy Joel. I love Billy Joel, just did a documentary, it's coming on HBO about him.

• 51:52Speaker 03

  Oh, you did, really?

• 51:53Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, produced it in my company.

• 51:54Speaker 03

  Oh, amazing.

• 51:55Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, but. Well, hang on a second. You're. You're a huge Billy Joel.

• 52:00Will Arnett?

  He's the piano man.

• 52:05Speaker 03

  Sorry.

• 52:05Sean Hayes?

  So stupid.

• 52:07Speaker 03

  Just crushing this bit to death.

• 52:11Sean Hayes?

  Wait, are you a singer?

• 52:12Speaker 03

  No, I can't sing at all.

• 52:14Sean Hayes?

  Oh, so you just kind of do it?

• 52:15Speaker 03

  Yeah, I guess so.

• 52:17Jason Bateman?

  Where are you right now? What room are we enjoying?

• 52:20Speaker 03

  This is our office over on Radford. It is on Radford. Did you just say Radford? I did. How did you know that? I don't know. There was something about the bleakness of it that looked like Radford.

• 52:32Sean Hayes?

  What? Are you still doing the show Severance? I thought it was rad.

• 52:34Speaker 03

  No, Naomi and I have a company that we have our office here.

• 52:38Sean Hayes?

  Oh, that's great. That's great.

• 52:40Speaker 03

  That's fucking crazy that I just- It's insane that you just said Radford.

• 52:42Jason Bateman?

  They're about to redo that whole studio. Have you been consulted about that?

• 52:48Speaker 03

  Uh, no, they haven't asked me anything about that and now I'm pretty fucking pissed.

• 52:53Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, no, they're gonna redo the whole thing. It's kind of rad.

• 52:56Speaker 03

  Bring the blueprints over and go through it with me.

• 52:58Sean Hayes?

  Wait, what are you excited about that's coming out of your company?

• 53:02Speaker 03

  Uh, well, we're developing a bunch of stuff right now.

• 53:06Sean Hayes?

  And do you like that kind of work? Like, uh, working with writers and taking a script and...

• 53:11Speaker 03

  I do. I know you do too. I'm sure, I know all of you guys do. Uh, yes, I do. I mean, I think like, and I don't know if it's the same for you guys, but after acting for so long, it's nice to use all the hours of your day, you know, because, you know, after a certain number of years, you realize that, uh, that acting can take up this much. But if you're, you know, producing or whatever, you can sort of-

• 53:40Sean Hayes?

  Stay busy.

• 53:40Speaker 03

  Take all of it. Yeah, and sort of keep your eye on the whole thing, the thing as a whole, instead of just your little part of it that you can't really control all that much.

• 53:50Jason Bateman?

  Are they listening to you at all over there on Severance? Let's get you in trouble here.

• 53:53Speaker 03

  Let's do it.

• 53:54Jason Bateman?

  When you have thoughts and ideas over there at Severance, um, fun to, fun to get there and get involved?

• 54:00Speaker 03

  Yeah, for sure. Uh, Dan Erickson, who created it, and Ben, and it's great, yeah.

• 54:08Speaker 03

  Dan Erickson and Ben Stiller. Yeah, it's a great group of people. We have, we have great time.

• 54:14Jason Bateman?

  And where are you in that process? You've got, you're, you're out here in LA. You're obviously not shooting. You are waiting to hear about a third season or, or plans to start it?

• 54:24Sean Hayes?

  Well, they're not gonna not make a third season.

• 54:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, we're hopeful that we'll be able to make a third season.

• 54:32Jason Bateman?

  When would you start doing that if they do?

• 54:34Speaker 03

  Hopefully really soon, so it's not, you know, this last break was like a three years, a three year wait between seasons. So hopefully it'll be a lot shorter than that.

• 54:42Jason Bateman?

  And that's in, that's in New York, right?

• 54:45Speaker 03

  New York, yeah.

• 54:45Jason Bateman?

  And how does that work with?

• 54:49Speaker 03

  Family.

• 54:50Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, do you, I mean, it's, it's, it's, it's, sometimes it's an annoying thing to hear about us complain about, but it is a real thing. You know, it's not easy to manage working away from Los Angeles where a lot of the work happens.

• 55:05Speaker 03

  It is, it's really, it's really hard with family because I know you just finished something out there. For Severance, it's like nine, 10 months we're shooting that show and.

• 55:16Jason Bateman?

  Wow.

• 55:17Speaker 03

  So it's just like, you know, you're just gone and I know you try, I try and fly back as much as possible, but I don't end up with much time off. And, but the kids, the good thing is, is teenagers, they play out on their own if they want to and they love going to New York. You know, you figure it out, but it's, it is, it's, it's a drag.

• 55:35Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 55:36Speaker 03

  It's hard.

• 55:37Sean Hayes?

  Go back to, you know, I didn't know all this music, I didn't know you love music as much as I do or probably Will does.

• 55:45Jason Bateman?

  Jason.

• 55:45Sean Hayes?

  What do you mean, like, like, like, like?

• 55:47Jason Bateman?

  Jason doesn't know, Jason doesn't know what he likes.

• 55:49Speaker 03

  Jason doesn't care for music.

• 55:50Jason Bateman?

  No, he doesn't get it.

• 55:51Sean Hayes?

  I like sounds.

• 55:54Jason Bateman?

  But you did a whole. Somebody tell me what's cool.

• 55:58Sean Hayes?

  You did a whole podcast about U2, which I didn't know, and R E M. And did you meet Bono or U2 or anything? Is that true? Yeah, it was in the intro.

• 56:05Speaker 03

  Yeah, we did. Scott Aukerman and I.

• 56:08Sean Hayes?

  Don't get pissed off, Sean.

• 56:10Speaker 03

  Scott Aukerman.

• 56:11Sean Hayes?

  It was in my fucking written intro.

• 56:13Speaker 03

  We, we started a podcast about U2, just sort of as a joke, just like a, sort of as a joke, because U2 kind of felt like a funny, funny subject matter, just because they're so sort of mainstream. We go and analyze. We, we weren't sure what it was gonna be, but we just started going album by album through U2's catalog, both of us growing up with them and being fans and stuff. But then, and it's so stupid, it's ridiculous bits and stuff, but, but super fun. But then eventually, and it was not our intention at all when we started it, eventually we did have the band on a couple of times.

• 56:56Sean Hayes?

  That's amazing.

• 56:57Speaker 03

  Which was, yeah, it was super.

• 56:59Sean Hayes?

  Did you, did you see them perform at the Sphere?

• 57:01Speaker 03

  Yeah. Yeah.

• 57:02Sean Hayes?

  Wasn't that incredible? That venue was just stunning.

• 57:05Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's crazy. I went opening night, I think, like the very first, yeah. It was wild.

• 57:12Sean Hayes?

  Mm hmm. First of all, thank you for being here today. Theater stories. Yeah. Well, by the way, if you have a theater story, I love a good theater story. You could tell me now. We can end strong right here.

• 57:22Speaker 03

  I, I actually don't.

• 57:24Sean Hayes?

  All right. Okay, next question?

• 57:25Speaker 03

  I do.

• 57:26Sean Hayes?

  So. Finish strong, Sean. Come on. No, I, I, I want to talk about like Billy Joel and like why you love him so much, because I love him so much. And you, I think you met Paul Rudd and you got to meet Billy Joel. And you and Paul met him at the same time or something?

• 57:38Speaker 03

  We had him, we, we, I did this thing, Naomi and I made this show for Adult Swim, where we recreated opening credit sequences for TV shows from the eighties.

• 57:50Sean Hayes?

  That's funny.

• 57:51Speaker 03

  Shot for shot made these opening credit sequences. So we did Bosom Buddies with Rudd and I as those guys.

• 57:57Sean Hayes?

  Funny.

• 57:58Speaker 03

  And it was a Billy Joel song, obviously, was the theme song. And so as part of the, like, fake documentary about the making of this thing, we got Billy Joel to join us and play the song for us.

• 58:12Sean Hayes?

  I wanna see that.

• 58:13Speaker 03

  He was great. He was really. Really funny and great.

• 58:16Sean Hayes?

  That's cool, yeah.

• 58:17Will Arnett?

  Sean, I didn't know that you liked Billy Joel so much.

• 58:19Sean Hayes?

  I love Billy Joel. I know, I play his music, I sing his songs. My go-to is Honesty, I love that song.

• 58:25Speaker 03

  Oh, it's a great song.

• 58:25Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 58:26Speaker 03

  Did you see him at the Madison Square Garden?

• 58:28Will Arnett?

  Yeah, because I was about to say bullshit.

• 58:29Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, bullshit on that.

• 58:30Will Arnett?

  But, okay.

• 58:31Sean Hayes?

  No, I couldn't make it out for Madison Square Garden, but I really wanted to. But I've seen him in concert many, many times.

• 58:36Speaker 03

  Yeah, he's great.

• 58:37Jason Bateman?

  Another guy with two first names.

• 58:39Will Arnett?

  Yeah, that's right.

• 58:40Speaker 03

  Oh, man.

• 58:41Sean Hayes?

  Billy Joel, yeah, look at that. Adam Cordero.

• 58:43Speaker 03

  That's me.

• 58:43Sean Hayes?

  Adam Cordero.

• 58:44Speaker 03

  That's me.

• 58:45Will Arnett?

  Adam Scott, listen, I wanted to ask you, but we don't, we ran out of time, we're saying goodbye, but, but, uh, you must get stopped, people must stop you all the time because of, uh, of stuff you do. But Step Brothers, people must go

• 58:57Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 58:58Will Arnett?

  crazy on you, right?

• 59:00Speaker 03

  Uh, yeah, it's still, like, that was, you know, a while ago, and, yeah.

• 59:04Will Arnett?

  I know, but it was so popular.

• 59:06Speaker 03

  Love that movie, and I, I, I love it too. I'm, I'm sure I would feel that way if I wasn't.

• 59:10Jason Bateman?

  I love turning it on anytime I see it.

• 59:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 59:12Jason Bateman?

  Anytime I see it on TV, I, I watch it.

• 59:15Will Arnett?

  So good, you're so good in that movie.

• 59:16Jason Bateman?

  You've never sucked. Everything you do, you're great in. So I would imagine a lot of people, you've been a part of a lot of really great things that are very cool in the comedy world.

• 59:27Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 59:28Jason Bateman?

  And, uh, it's something you should, I'm sure you do really, um, uh, are proud of.

• 59:34Speaker 03

  Well, likewise, and you know, the part, the part of that, when I was talking earlier about that kind of figuring it out when we started Party Down, the other part of that that I was gonna get to was when I was telling someone about the show, I forget who it was. I was like, yeah, it's this catering team, and I'm kind of at the center of it, and I'm not sure what to do. And they're like, oh, you're at the center of it? Like Bateman on Arrested Development.

• 59:59Jason Bateman?

  Right, which is the craziness circling around him.

• 1:00:02Speaker 03

  Yes, and that was so key to kind of figuring it out is, watch, you know, I was watching the show anyway, but really thinking about it from that perspective was very key.

• 1:00:14Will Arnett?

  Right, like, how, how could you do?

• 1:00:16Jason Bateman?

  How can I be a robot, go ahead, Will.

• 1:00:16Will Arnett?

  How could you be, how could you be as sort of charmless and

• 1:00:20Speaker 03

  That's right.

• 1:00:21Will Arnett?

  How can you suck all the charisma? Yeah, charismaless and just be a blank mayonnaise on mayonnaise on egg?

• 1:00:30Speaker 03

  Thank you, Will.

• 1:00:33Will Arnett?

  Well, what an inspiration.

• 1:00:36Jason Bateman?

  Happy to provide some sort of guidance.

• 1:00:40Sean Hayes?

  Adam, we love you. Thank you for being here today.

• 1:00:42Speaker 03

  Guys, thank you for having me. Such a pleasure to show.

• 1:00:43Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, that's really cool.

• 1:00:45Jason Bateman?

  Adam, love you. Adam.

• 1:00:47Speaker 03

  Love you guys.

• 1:00:47Will Arnett?

  Please pass on our regards to Naomi.

• 1:00:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, thank you. Thank you.

• 1:00:51Will Arnett?

  Yeah, thanks for doing this.

• 1:00:53Speaker 03

  Please tell Abel and Archie, I doubt they remember me, but please tell them hello. They're like

• 1:00:58Jason Bateman?

  I saw Abel yesterday.

• 1:00:59Speaker 03

  Full teenagers now.

• 1:01:00Will Arnett?

  They are full teenagers. I will, JB ran into Abe. Abe texted me from school. That's how I knew JB. And he's like, I just ran into Jason and he grabbed my ear. And I was like, yeah, that sounds about right. And you know, they are such big fans. I can say this. They're such big fans of yours and of Parks and Rec, even though it's their mom's show. During the pandemic, we watched, Abe and I watched all these episodes, like most of Parks and Rec, again, watched it all the way through. And then I would say to Amy like, hey, that episode was really good.

• 1:01:34Jason Bateman?

  Right.

• 1:01:34Sean Hayes?

  Super highlight.

• 1:01:36Will Arnett?

  Yeah, like eight years later.

• 1:01:37Speaker 03

  My kids have yet to see Parks and Rec. They're just, they don't care at all.

• 1:01:42Jason Bateman?

  Do they? I don't know.

• 1:01:44Speaker 03

  Don't care.

• 1:01:44Jason Bateman?

  Your kids are like mine. They don't watch anything that we do.

• 1:01:47Speaker 03

  Nothing.

• 1:01:47Will Arnett?

  They haven't watched Arrested Development. My kids, and Abe loves comedy.

• 1:01:50Speaker 03

  Well, neither does Sean, right?

• 1:01:52Will Arnett?

  No, Sean's never watched it.

• 1:01:54Jason Bateman?

  And he is one of our children. So wait, Abe and Archie have not watched Arrested?

• 1:01:58Will Arnett?

  No, and their friends have. And they're like, Abe was like, a lot of my friends love BoJack Horseman.

• 1:02:03Jason Bateman?

  We're gonna strap these kids down one goddamn day.

• 1:02:05Speaker 03

  They should watch Arrested and they should, Arrested Development, and they should watch BoJack Horseman. That would be so incredible.

• 1:02:11Jason Bateman?

  And Parks and Rec. We're gonna strap them down and they will respect us.

• 1:02:16Will Arnett?

  Amy kind of guilted them into it, though, if I'm being honest. If I'm totally honest. In a way that only Polar can, you know? Okay, fine. Don't watch it, you know?

• 1:02:27Jason Bateman?

  Your choice.

• 1:02:28Will Arnett?

  Adam, thank you, dude.

• 1:02:29Speaker 03

  Guys, thank you.

• 1:02:30Jason Bateman?

  Love you, buddy.

• 1:02:31Speaker 03

  Great to see you. Love you too.

• 1:02:33Will Arnett?

  Bye.

• 1:02:33Jason Bateman?

  Bye, pal.

• 1:02:34Speaker 03

  Take it easy.

• 1:02:37Jason Bateman?

  Now that feels like we kind of deprived the audience of a really good interview, because it just felt like we were just sitting on the couch, uh, he's over here-

• 1:02:45Sean Hayes?

  But that's okay.

• 1:02:46Jason Bateman?

  ...at one of our homes, like, he always is, and, and I feel like we were undisciplined. I was, and-

• 1:02:52Will Arnett?

  Disrespectful.

• 1:02:53Jason Bateman?

  ...just a bunch of bullshit, not really asking questions.

• 1:02:55Sean Hayes?

  No, no, no, no, that's... You know what, no, it was like the Catherine Han episode, you know, where we, a good friend comes on and we just kind of chit chat.

• 1:03:02Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, just a bunch of bullshit, yeah. We apologize, listener, we're just children here.

• 1:03:06Will Arnett?

  Adam likes to fuck around and do bits and joke around, and so, why not?

• 1:03:10Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:11Will Arnett?

  I mean, it must have been like that on Will and Grace.

• 1:03:15Sean Hayes?

  Oh.

• 1:03:16Speaker 04

  I love it.

• 1:03:21Speaker 04

  Everybody's gay.

• 1:03:27Speaker 04

  I finally feel good about my sexuality.

• 1:03:33Speaker 04

  I feel safe to come out now.

• 1:03:38Speaker 04

  Please let me out. Can I sit closer to the stage now?

• 1:03:45Speaker 04

  I'm in, I'm in here. I can't see anything from back here.

• 1:03:52Sean Hayes?

  That is so funny.

• 1:03:54Jason Bateman?

  So dumb.

• 1:03:55Sean Hayes?

  It's so great.

• 1:03:56Jason Bateman?

  Hey, but listen, at the end of the day, at the end of the day, you need people like Adam Scott.

• 1:04:02Will Arnett?

  Oh, good for you to bring it back. Look at you, whatever possible steward of our show.

• 1:04:08Jason Bateman?

  I'm trying to talk slowly here as I try to think up a bye.

• 1:04:11Sean Hayes?

  No, I got one.

• 1:04:11Jason Bateman?

  So by having, okay, by having Adam in our world, socially, professionally, what, Sean?

• 1:04:20Will Arnett?

  He landed.

• 1:04:21Sean Hayes?

  Wonderful, it's wonderful, it's like, what are your Italian, well, your Italian friend would say ciao, but we would say-

• 1:04:26Jason Bateman?

  Instead, we would say, "Bye-bye."

• 1:04:28Sean Hayes?

  Bye-bye.

• 1:04:29Speaker 04

  Bye-bye.

• 1:04:30Jason Bateman?

  Bye-bye.

• 1:04:38Will Arnett?

  Smart. Less.

• 1:04:43Will Arnett?

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• 1:04:55Will Arnett?

  Smart. Less.

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• 1:05:32Speaker 06

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