The Auschwitz Survivor Who Chose Freedom | Dr. Edith Eger

Dr. Edith Eger was 16 years old when she danced for Josef Mengele at Auschwitz the same night her mother was sent to the gas chamber. She survived. And then she spent decades running from what happened until she finally turned around and walked straight back into it. What she found there changed everything. Edith teaches that freedom is not something that happens to you. It is something you choose. Again and again. By becoming your own good parent, facing what you have been carrying, and giving yourself permission to let go. Anger is not the primary emotion, she says. Underneath it is always fear. And underneath fear is a little child who just needs someone to show up. This conversation will rearrange something inside you. It is not about forgetting. It is not about overcoming. It is about learning to cherish the wound, and using it to become more alive. Dr. Edith’s website Dr. Edith on Instagram Dr. Edith’s courses Dr. Edith’s books: The Choice: Embrace the Possible The Gift: 14 Lessons to Save Your Life The Ballerina of Auschwitz: Young Adult Edition of The Choice In this episode you will: Discover why the key to your freedom is already in your pocket, even if you have been in your own mental prison for years Learn how to turn depression into expression by facing the rage you have been running from instead of medicating or analyzing it Understand the critical difference between being a victim and being victimized, and why one destroys your potential while the other leaves your power intact Find out how to stop living for other people's approval by becoming the loving parent to yourself that you may have never had Reclaim the joy and passion you thought you lost by asking one simple question about everything you do For more information go to https://lewishowes.com/1922 For more Greatness text PODCAST to +1 (614) 350-3960 Follow The Daily Motivation for essential highlights from The School of Greatness More SOG episodes we think you’ll love: Lewis Howes Solo [STOP Letting People Walk All Over You] Amy Purdy Michelle Obama Get more from Lewis! Get my New York Times Bestselling book, Make Money Easy! Get The Greatness Mindset audiobook on SpotifyText Lewis AIYouTubeInstagramWebsiteTiktokFacebookX Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Lewis Howes?

  Hey everyone, it's Lewis. And before we dive in, I want to take a quick moment. We are sharing this conversation as a memorial because we lost one of the most extraordinary human beings I've ever had the privilege of sitting across from. Dr. Edith Eger, a Holocaust survivor, a healer, and a woman who has spent most of her time helping other people become free. She survived things that most of us cannot even imagine. And instead of carrying hatred, instead of carrying bitterness, she chose love. She chose forgiveness, and most importantly, she chose freedom. So today, we're here to

• 0:41Lewis Howes?

  honor her by sharing her words with you one more time, or maybe for the first time. And if that's you, I want you to know that you are about to hear something that could genuinely transform your life. For me, this episode is a gift, and she is and was a gift. Dr. Edith Eger, thank you for everything you gave this world. You will never be forgotten.

• 1:11Lewis Howes?

  Well, what would you like people to know about you? And how would you want to be remembered?

• 1:13Edith Eger?

  I'd like to be known as someone who did everything in her power, everything, to see to it that it will never happen again. I'm into prevention. I don't ask why me, I say what now. Why is a past-oriented world a problem-oriented world? I like to deal with the present and think young. So when a man takes me out and is trying to figure out how old am I, I'm going to ask him to take me home. Because if he's into numbers, he's not my man.

• 1:59Lewis Howes?

  What should he be into?

• 2:01Edith Eger?

  I think he would be interested in, perhaps, what really gives me joy.

• 2:11Lewis Howes?

  What is that?

• 2:13Edith Eger?

  Joy in my heart.

• 2:16Edith Eger?

  Like I have joy knowing that I have three children. I have five grandchildren and seven great grandsons.

• 2:28Lewis Howes?

  All sons, great grandsons.

• 2:29Edith Eger?

  All sons, no girls. Yeah, so I think it's good to really know that. Many people ask me, "Write a book, write a book, write a book." And I would say automatically, "I have nothing to say." "I have nothing to say."

• 2:51Edith Eger?

  "I have a lot to say." "And so do you." "And you're committed to really change the people who don't think that they matter." Because there'll never be another you.

• 3:10Edith Eger?

  You're one of a kind, diamond. I see it in your eyes, you know? You're very precious.

• 3:17Lewis Howes?

  Thank you.

• 3:18Edith Eger?

  You're very, very precious. And I know many people probably have changed because they knew that what they're doing now, they are revolving, not evolving.

• 3:33Lewis Howes?

  What does that mean, revolving, not evolving?

• 3:36Edith Eger?

  Revolving, that you go back and do the same thing over and over again and expect different results.

• 3:42Lewis Howes?

  Repeating the same pattern.

• 3:43Edith Eger?

  Which is the definition of.

• 3:45Lewis Howes?

  The same thing.

• 3:48Lewis Howes?

  Is that Einstein, I think, right?

• 3:49Edith Eger?

  I think it was Einstein.

• 3:51Lewis Howes?

  I'm curious. Now, you have seven grandsons, right?

• 3:56Edith Eger?

  Right.

• 3:57Lewis Howes?

  Seven grandsons. I think, are the two twins, the two-year-olds, are those the youngest grandsons you have?

• 4:02Edith Eger?

  Their youngest, yeah.

• 4:03Lewis Howes?

  So there's ninety-three years-ish between you and your youngest grandsons.

• 4:10Edith Eger?

  And they come with their head because they know I'm gonna kiss it. So they just come and bring their little head.

• 4:18Lewis Howes?

  It's pretty good you kiss it.

• 4:19Edith Eger?

  And I, I don't know, there are people who kiss their heads.

• 4:23Lewis Howes?

  That's beautiful. That's great.

• 4:25Edith Eger?

  But I don't.

• 4:26Lewis Howes?

  I'm curious, what is the, the, you know, they, at this moment, they don't know the type of life you've had, right? Not until they're a little older will they understand the stories and hear the stories about your whole experience from what, you know, their great-grandmother went through and how you overcame so many challenges and obstacles and how you became a member of society for hope and inspiration. I'm curious, if you could share three lessons with them to set them up for their life, what would those three lessons be?

• 5:02Edith Eger?

  I probably would tell them

• 5:06Edith Eger?

  that I will never forget what happened.

• 5:13Edith Eger?

  I don't know what means to overcome.

• 5:20Edith Eger?

  I don't think I, I don't know exactly what that means, but I came to terms with it. I call it my cherished wound.

• 5:31Lewis Howes?

  Cherished wound.

• 5:32Edith Eger?

  Yes. I cherish the wound

• 5:39Edith Eger?

  that I learned in the classroom of Auschwitz.

• 5:44Lewis Howes?

  How does someone learn to cherish their wounds if something is so tragic and so traumatic?

• 5:49Edith Eger?

  You don't appreciate what you have until we lose it.

• 5:54Edith Eger?

  See, if you take me out to dinner, and you might do that, take me out to lunch.

• 6:03Edith Eger?

  I think I'm gonna eat up my food. And then I'm gonna pick up your leftovers. And if I don't do that, I'll take it home. I never waste any food. I never leave food on my plate or in your plate. I do something with it and I give it away. You know.

• 6:34Lewis Howes?

  Why do you do that?

• 6:35Edith Eger?

  One time I had a party and I had a lot of leftovers. And I went out and I I saw someone at the corner waiting. And I gave them the food.

• 6:47Lewis Howes?

  Why do you, why is that something you do?

• 6:49Edith Eger?

  I told you, no, they must be hungry. But they didn't want food, they wanted money. So they threw it back at me. I don't want your goddamn food. Give me money.

• 7:03Lewis Howes?

  Right. What's another thing you'd share with your grandkids, your great grandkids?

• 7:09Edith Eger?

  Well, right now, they're too young to listen to anything. But my great grandson are fifteen, twelve, and ten. And they're very interested in grandma. And I, and I'm a very interesting person to be with. I have a lot to say. And not what happens, it's what you do with it.

• 7:43Lewis Howes?

  Right. I think the coming to terms with the cherished wound, it's like creating meaning around what happened, right?

• 7:49Edith Eger?

  Exactly, the existential vacuum. Viktor Frankl used to refer to that. And it's very important to know that it's not clinical depression.

• 8:01Lewis Howes?

  Why do people get that confused?

• 8:03Edith Eger?

  Yeah, well, I had two paraplegics, both coming from Vietnam. Same symptomatologist, same diagnosis. Okay. And one of them was in a kind of a fetal position. Why me? How could anyone do this to me? Blaming God, blaming, you name it, the country, of course. Converse with the other one said to me. Same symptomatology, same diagnosis, same prognosis. He said to me, "Hey, doc."

• 8:40Edith Eger?

  I was wearing a white coat and it said, "Dr. Iger, Department of Psychiatry."

• 8:46Lewis Howes?

  Uh huh.

• 8:46Edith Eger?

  Okay. He says, "Hey, doc. I'm so grateful that I sit in a wheelchair because I can reach my children much closer."

• 8:59Lewis Howes?

  Oh, my goodness.

• 9:00Edith Eger?

  Can you believe it? And I can, and reach the flowers much closer. And I felt like the biggest imposter. Because I had a 16-year-old in me that I ran away from.

• 9:16Lewis Howes?

  Hmm.

• 9:16Edith Eger?

  I really wasn't qualified to take them further.

• 9:21Edith Eger?

  Because I have not taken myself.

• 9:23Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 9:24Edith Eger?

  You know, I went to school and I went to school and, you know, I became Dr. Edith Y. Iger. But I never really did the work and...

• 9:35Lewis Howes?

  Really? The healing work?

• 9:36Edith Eger?

  So I went back to Auschwitz.

• 9:38Lewis Howes?

  When did you go back?

• 9:40Edith Eger?

  I asked my sister to come with me.

• 9:46Edith Eger?

  Probably in the 70s, early 80s. And she told me, "I'm an idiot." And that was the end of that, my sister coming with me. And I went alone. And today the work I do to revisit the places where you've been. To relive that experience, but then you revise your life.

• 10:09Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm. Relive the experience and then revise your life.

• 10:13Edith Eger?

  Exactly.

• 10:13Lewis Howes?

  Rewrite the story.

• 10:14Edith Eger?

  It's not going back. It's a new beginning.

• 10:17Lewis Howes?

  Oh, wow. So when you went there, what opened up for you? What, what, did you feel a lot of sadness and pain? Or is that where you started to rewrite it?

• 10:25Edith Eger?

  I was angry and I didn't know what to do with anger.

• 10:33Edith Eger?

  I ran from it. But I was angry. I was mad as hell. And I had to find a way to turn depression into expression.

• 10:47Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm. What happens if we continue to run from anger in our lives?

• 10:53Edith Eger?

  We just build it up. It doesn't go away.

• 10:57Lewis Howes?

  You can't run away from it.

• 10:58Edith Eger?

  You cannot run away. It's better to face it, not fight it or run from it, no. So I did go back to Auschwitz. And today, the work I do, that, yes, I hold your hand and we visit your little room, your little home, the hallway. And you're holding my hand. I'm taking you out of there.

• 11:27Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 11:28Edith Eger?

  Because that was then, and this is now. And you can find that little boy in you, the little girl in you, and buy him an ice cream cone. And because that little boy is crying.

• 11:43Lewis Howes?

  What happens if we never revisit the little boy or girl inside of us?

• 11:48Edith Eger?

  We have unresolved grief.

• 11:49Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 11:50Edith Eger?

  And I think that's what therapy is. It's all grief work. Not what happened, what didn't happen.

• 11:57Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 11:57Edith Eger?

  Because I remember when my granddaughter asked me to buy her a beautiful dress, which I am very good at, buying good dresses, so she could go to bishop's school to dance. And I come home, and out of the blue, I'm crying. They would understand. I didn't understand. What's the matter with me? I just bought little precious Lindsay a beautiful dress. I think it was a Laura Ashley original. And...

• 12:36Edith Eger?

  But I realized that I'm not crying because Lindsay is going to the dance. I cried because I never went to a dance.

• 12:46Edith Eger?

  So I think the unresolved grief is important to make peace with.

• 12:54Lewis Howes?

  So when something like that happened for you, or happens in any of our lives, what can we do to face it? And I have a photo on my phone of myself when I was younger, right?

• 13:06Edith Eger?

  And that little boy.

• 13:07Lewis Howes?

  Exactly, to go back into those places that were wounded and have a conversation and I talk to him and I reflect.

• 13:15Edith Eger?

  And let him feel the feeling, rather than talk about the feeling.

• 13:20Lewis Howes?

  Let him feel it.

• 13:21Edith Eger?

  What we do in America, we're hearing but we're not listening. It's very good to repeat what you hear and they tell you whether it's true or false. I think it's very important to write your book.

• 13:42Lewis Howes?

  So you said anger is something that...

• 13:46Edith Eger?

  Not the primary emotion.

• 13:48Lewis Howes?

  It's not the primary... So when someone feels anger, what is it they really feel?

• 13:52Edith Eger?

  Fear.

• 13:53Lewis Howes?

  Afraid of what?

• 13:58Edith Eger?

  Fear of being found out that you're true self.

• 14:05Lewis Howes?

  Is it fear of being found out that your true self is not lovable or not enough? Or you're never gonna amount to anything? Or is never going to... No one's gonna accept you?

• 14:15Edith Eger?

  That you're a fake.

• 14:17Lewis Howes?

  Oh, wow. Do you think everyone feels that way at some point in life?

• 14:21Edith Eger?

  I think it's very seldom that a person never regrets anything.

• 14:30Edith Eger?

  I think it's important to acknowledge that you say to yourself, "If I knew then what I know now, I could have done things differently."

• 14:43Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 14:44Edith Eger?

  And that's it, that's the end of that.

• 14:46Lewis Howes?

  That's it?

• 14:46Edith Eger?

  That's it.

• 14:47Lewis Howes?

  But why do we hold on to the pain so long? And why do we shame ourselves and beat ourselves up emotionally? Because we didn't have the knowledge when we were five, or 10, or 16, or 20?

• 14:59Edith Eger?

  Maybe we didn't have good role models. That it's okay to feel any feelings without the fear of being judged. There is no right feeling or wrong feeling. There is only my feeling.

• 15:12Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 15:13Edith Eger?

  And underneath of anger is fear. So it's very good to ride on all your fears, from the least anxiety-producing to the most anxiety. And then we knock them down. Because you were not born with fear. You were born with love, joy,

• 15:34Edith Eger?

  and passion for life.

• 15:37Lewis Howes?

  I love that you say this, because I feel like...

• 15:39Edith Eger?

  I'm full of passion.

• 15:40Lewis Howes?

  You are. You're feisty. You're feisty. I like it.

• 15:44Edith Eger?

  Yes, sir.

• 15:45Lewis Howes?

  I love this idea of writing down your fears and then knocking them down.

• 15:48Edith Eger?

  Knock them down because you were not born with them. You learned it.

• 15:54Lewis Howes?

  When did you start to knock down your fears? How old were you roughly?

• 16:01Edith Eger?

  I think I was 16 in Auschwitz. And I developed inside

• 16:11Edith Eger?

  something that I cherish today. My inner resources, that I don't look at life from outside in. And I give up my need for other people's approval.

• 16:25Lewis Howes?

  You did that when you were 16?

• 16:27Edith Eger?

  I did that.

• 16:28Lewis Howes?

  Wow. You gave up your need for other people's approval then?

• 16:30Edith Eger?

  Exactly.

• 16:34Lewis Howes?

  What does that do for you when you give up the need?

• 16:37Edith Eger?

  It give me my true self.

• 16:40Lewis Howes?

  Your authentic, expressive self.

• 16:42Edith Eger?

  That I am my own good mommy to me.

• 16:46Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 16:47Edith Eger?

  And then I ask, is this empowering me or depleting me?

• 16:54Edith Eger?

  If I'm gonna have alcohol, I'm messing with my brain.

• 17:00Lewis Howes?

  So you're not gonna do something to try to look good in front of others and try to make others like you?

• 17:06Edith Eger?

  What the neighbors think about us, yes.

• 17:09Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 17:11Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 17:11Edith Eger?

  I think very important for children, especially for the father, to be a good role model to the children the way he treats the children's mother, his wife.

• 17:27Lewis Howes?

  How should the father treat the mother specifically?

• 17:31Edith Eger?

  Never raise your voice. When you're angry in English, you start the sentence with "you." "You are stupid, you." When you hear "you," you're gonna be dumb-tuned and you say to yourself, "The longer they talk, the more relaxed I become." You take the negative stimuli, turn it immediately into something positive. I think there is a Mexican psychiatrist who wrote a little book that is very valuable and it's called "The Four."

• 18:10Lewis Howes?

  Agreements, so good. Don't take anything personally.

• 18:13Edith Eger?

  Don't take it personally.

• 18:15Lewis Howes?

  It's so powerful. How does someone learn to not take it personally? If someone's saying, "You did this and you're stupid and you're..." How do you learn to just be peaceful around it?

• 18:25Edith Eger?

  I know better.

• 18:28Edith Eger?

  That's what you think. And this is what I feel. And men are not taught to feel the feelings. They talk about the feeling, they analyze the feeling. They medicate the feeling, rather than just feeling the feeling. A good cry, what comes out of your body will never make you ill. What stays in there does. Like pus, you know, you have to.

• 19:02Lewis Howes?

  Get it out.

• 19:02Edith Eger?

  Get it out.

• 19:03Lewis Howes?

  Get it out. So that's how.

• 19:05Edith Eger?

  Scream it out.

• 19:06Lewis Howes?

  Scream it out.

• 19:07Edith Eger?

  In the car.

• 19:08Lewis Howes?

  In a pillow.

• 19:10Edith Eger?

  Scream.

• 19:10Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 19:11Edith Eger?

  Cry, and then laugh like a hyena, and you feel better.

• 19:16Lewis Howes?

  Laugh like a hyena?

• 19:17Edith Eger?

  Yeah.

• 19:19Lewis Howes?

  Get it out, shake it out.

• 19:20Edith Eger?

  Shake it out.

• 19:21Lewis Howes?

  How should, you know, a wife be around her husband with her kids?

• 19:27Edith Eger?

  So what is happening, the husband comes home. And the wife already knows, just by looking at him, that there is something going on. But she doesn't say anything, because he doesn't say anything either, because he's scared. If he's gonna say something, things are gonna get worse.

• 19:48Lewis Howes?

  She's scared.

• 19:49Edith Eger?

  She's scared, they're both scared, but they don't really sit down.

• 19:56Edith Eger?

  Which I do, really, to make them really see what's really going on.

• 20:05Edith Eger?

  But down the line, if they don't do that, they will miss passion in life, for sure. I don't know what else right now to think of. Passion, joy, joy and passion, for sure.

• 20:24Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 20:24Edith Eger?

  So if you want joy and passion, have a fight.

• 20:30Edith Eger?

  But pay attention how you finish a fight.

• 20:33Lewis Howes?

  How should you finish the fight?

• 20:35Edith Eger?

  That's right, that you can agree to disagree. That not I'm right, you're wrong. I'm good, you're bad. None of that.

• 20:43Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 20:43Edith Eger?

  We're human. We do make mistakes. And we have a good talk about it. And hopefully, learn from it. So we won't repeat it.

• 20:54Lewis Howes?

  Right, right. And you worked with Viktor Frankl too, right? Didn't you work with him?

• 20:58Edith Eger?

  I worked with Viktor Frankl very much. I remember we were in Germany. And we danced together.

• 21:06Lewis Howes?

  You danced together?

• 21:07Edith Eger?

  Yes.

• 21:08Lewis Howes?

  Was he a good dancer?

• 21:09Edith Eger?

  And then he said something. Is this the last tango? I think it was Regensburg or one of those places.

• 21:19Edith Eger?

  Where we had our conference.

• 21:23Edith Eger?

  Viktor Frankl was like you, a kind of a Renaissance man. He was taking flying lessons.

• 21:35Edith Eger?

  When I met him, he was in his 70s.

• 21:37Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 21:38Edith Eger?

  He died when he was 92.

• 21:42Edith Eger?

  But he was truly my mentor.

• 21:47Lewis Howes?

  What was your biggest lessons from him that he taught you?

• 21:52Edith Eger?

  The logo therapy. Logo means finding purpose and meaning in your life. It's called the existential vacuum. That most people are called clinical depression. No.

• 22:08Lewis Howes?

  What, is clinical depression a thing? Or is there a way to get out of it without medication?

• 22:15Edith Eger?

  Yeah, well, we pathologize. We pathologize too much.

• 22:21Edith Eger?

  I think it's it's very good to

• 22:27Edith Eger?

  Make the diagnosis

• 22:31Edith Eger?

  that doesn't have to pathologize like I'm sad, I'm scared. You know, to use the language that it doesn't have to go to diagnosis and medical. Medicine is important, you know. We have our blood and that needs to be hopefully valid, tended to.

• 22:59Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 23:00Edith Eger?

  We have our environment, but the way you respond to the other too.

• 23:07Edith Eger?

  I have a choice. To respond or react. When you react, you don't think.

• 23:15Lewis Howes?

  How does someone learn how to pause when there's an event, when there's a trigger?

• 23:21Edith Eger?

  Take a deep breath, and if that doesn't work, take another deep breath.

• 23:26Lewis Howes?

  Keep breathing until you react.

• 23:27Edith Eger?

  Keep breathing, because you cannot change what's outside of you.

• 23:34Lewis Howes?

  The environment, the event, what occurs?

• 23:37Edith Eger?

  You really are very powerless.

• 23:41Edith Eger?

  But you have power the way you choose to take the negative and turn it into positive. Because suffering makes you stronger. Suffering is part of life.

• 23:58Lewis Howes?

  Is there a way to minimize suffering in our lives?

• 24:03Edith Eger?

  You learn from history, so you won't repeat it.

• 24:09Edith Eger?

  That's why it's good to write a book. I write a book. People told me for years, "Write a book, write a book." And I would say, "I have nothing to say, I have nothing to say." But then Philip Zimbardo one morning calls me and says, "You know, Edie, the people who survived

• 24:33Edith Eger?

  and are famous, are all men. We need a female voice."

• 24:43Edith Eger?

  And that's my book, The Choice.

• 24:45Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 24:46Edith Eger?

  A female voice of Viktor Frankl.

• 24:49Lewis Howes?

  Wow, it's beautiful. You mentioned, I want to ask you about the fears again. Writing down a list of your fears and then knocking them down. What happens internally when we start to knock these fears down?

• 25:04Edith Eger?

  You replace it with something else. See, when you're in a car and you have to switch gears, you know, it talks to you, the car. So what you need to do is switch gears and release the clutch. What are you holding on to? My definition of love is the ability to let go. Let go. Don't live in the past. You cannot change the past.

• 25:45Edith Eger?

  That's one thing you cannot change, is the past. I don't live in the past. I don't forget it or overcome it. That's why I call it my cherished wound. Because part of me was left in Auschwitz. But not the better part, not the bigger part.

• 26:08Lewis Howes?

  How do you reclaim that part from that?

• 26:10Edith Eger?

  You go back to that place. And you can do it in your office with a Gestalt chair. Put them in that chair, tie them up, and beat them up.

• 26:23Lewis Howes?

  Sure.

• 26:23Edith Eger?

  Yeah.

• 26:26Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 26:27Edith Eger?

  How could you do this to me? I was only eight years old, you know, and you get it out. Scream it out and beat them up.

• 26:37Lewis Howes?

  If we don't get that emotion out, then we're the ones that suffer, right?

• 26:41Edith Eger?

  Yeah, because forgiveness has nothing to do with me forgiving you for what you did to me. I don't have any godly power at all. But I do have a power to look at everything that happened into an opportunity for an opportunity. And that was Auschwitz, the biggest classroom, the most important one I have gone to.

• 27:09Lewis Howes?

  Wow. So, do we need to forgive the person that created the pain? Do we need to forgive ourselves? What is harder?

• 27:20Edith Eger?

  I think we create

• 27:27Edith Eger?

  a time when I give you, myself, permission. That's a very good word. Give myself permission

• 27:38Edith Eger?

  to let go of the pain

• 27:44Edith Eger?

  and replace it with self-love, which is self-care, which is not narcissistic.

• 27:53Edith Eger?

  Love yourself is not narcissistic.

• 27:56Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, so give yourself, give myself permission to let go of the pain from the past.

• 28:01Edith Eger?

  Permission is a key word.

• 28:04Lewis Howes?

  And then replace it with self-love.

• 28:06Edith Eger?

  You know, if I could meet Dr. Mangala now, I really wanted to meet him. And I found out where he was, but I never really ended up meeting him in person. He went to South America. Most of the Nazis went through the

• 28:28Edith Eger?

  the Roman Catholics.

• 28:33Edith Eger?

  Somehow helped them to go through them to go to South America.

• 28:40Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. What would you have said to him? If you could have met him, what would you have said to him?

• 28:46Edith Eger?

  I would probably tell him, I have no idea what I would have done if I would have been in your shoes. You must have felt very powerful sending my mother to the gas chamber.

• 29:03Edith Eger?

  Because he asked me, "Is this your sister or is this your mother?" I still wanna cry, well, now. That stupidly I said, "It's my mother." Because I could not forgive myself that if I would have said my sister, she would have gone to the gas chamber.

• 29:27Edith Eger?

  But then I had to.

• 29:32Edith Eger?

  Recognize that I did what I could.

• 29:39Lewis Howes?

  No, you did the best.

• 29:40Edith Eger?

  And I did the best I could.

• 29:42Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 29:42Edith Eger?

  So forgiving yourself and not to judge yourself. You got to, you got to really, truly do the work.

• 29:52Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, that's powerful.

• 29:57Lewis Howes?

  I'm curious.

• 29:57Edith Eger?

  Suffering is make you stronger.

• 30:03Lewis Howes?

  How much?

• 30:03Edith Eger?

  Than ask for it.

• 30:05Lewis Howes?

  I don't want suffering.

• 30:06Edith Eger?

  Please.

• 30:08Lewis Howes?

  You don't want, you don't need to ask for it.

• 30:09Edith Eger?

  It's not a must, no.

• 30:10Lewis Howes?

  No, no, no, but it makes you stronger.

• 30:12Edith Eger?

  But if it happens, recognize that it's temporary.

• 30:15Lewis Howes?

  Yes, yes.

• 30:16Edith Eger?

  And you can survive it. So you become your own good parent.

• 30:21Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 30:22Edith Eger?

  Are you a good parent to you?

• 30:24Lewis Howes?

  Uh huh, now I am, yeah. After a lot of the healing work.

• 30:28Edith Eger?

  Yeah.

• 30:29Lewis Howes?

  Now I'm a very good parent to myself, yeah. I feel a lot of peace inside.

• 30:33Edith Eger?

  Well, you're a role model.

• 30:34Lewis Howes?

  But I didn't feel that for years, yeah.

• 30:35Edith Eger?

  You say what you live.

• 30:37Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm, yeah.

• 30:41Edith Eger?

  That's good.

• 30:42Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, it's a constant journey, you know?

• 30:44Edith Eger?

  Congratulations.

• 30:45Lewis Howes?

  Thank you, thank you.

• 30:50Lewis Howes?

  But a lot of your, you know, the first time I interviewed you, I was really inspired by how you shared so much wisdom about how to not take things personally and how to reinterpret when someone's saying something to you. Just say, "Well, I actually..." You're saying the opposite to yourself of like how you love yourself and how you're generous and kind. So I really appreciate that.

• 31:08Edith Eger?

  You know, just a very simple question. Whatever you're doing now, you ask, how is it working for you?

• 31:17Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 31:17Edith Eger?

  Is it empowering you or depleting you?

• 31:20Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm. And I'm curious about potential. You know, the potential that each one of us has as human beings.

• 31:27Edith Eger?

  Yes.

• 31:28Lewis Howes?

  How much of our potential is limited or blocked or shut down? If we do not learn to heal the different traumatic moments of our life? Can we still reach our potential if we don't face trauma? Or is it gonna be limited?

• 31:46Edith Eger?

  I think we're gonna be chronic victims. And every time you are a victim, you're gonna find a victimizer. Or you fluctuate between victim, becoming victimizer. And it's very important to think about what you're gonna say before you say it. Whether it's important, whether it's necessary, and whether it's kind. If it's not kind.

• 32:23Lewis Howes?

  Is it important? Is it necessary? Is it kind?

• 32:25Edith Eger?

  It's kind.

• 32:26Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 32:28Edith Eger?

  If it's not kind, you're just not gonna say it.

• 32:31Lewis Howes?

  Don't say it. How do we create a life where we don't become victims? Where we are empowered, no matter what happens? Even if there is something that occurs in life, an event that feels like we are a victim? How do we turn it so that we aren't a victim? Because I feel like being a victim is disempowering.

• 32:56Edith Eger?

  You cannot be a victim without a victimizer. If you're a victim, you're always gonna find a victimizer. Or you fluctuate between victim. Because victims are weak, and victimizers are strong. So part of the psyche will identify with the aggressor. That's what we call a Stockholm syndrome.

• 33:23Lewis Howes?

  Is there moments in life where we should be victims? Or is it never a good time to be a victim?

• 33:29Edith Eger?

  I think.

• 33:33Edith Eger?

  I...

• 33:34Lewis Howes?

  Does anything good come from it?

• 33:36Edith Eger?

  I never see myself that my identity would be being a victim.

• 33:43Lewis Howes?

  Uh huh.

• 33:43Edith Eger?

  I have no room for that in my life. I'm not a victim, I was victimized. It's not who I am, it's what was done to me. Very different.

• 33:55Lewis Howes?

  Uh huh.

• 33:57Edith Eger?

  Very different.

• 34:01Edith Eger?

  That I'm is amnesiac.

• 34:04Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 34:06Edith Eger?

  Because yesterday's victims can easily become today's victimizers.

• 34:11Lewis Howes?

  Uh huh, that's true.

• 34:14Edith Eger?

  I'm sure you know a great deal about that.

• 34:17Lewis Howes?

  Uh huh.

• 34:19Edith Eger?

  Tell me.

• 34:21Lewis Howes?

  Well, I mean, I was, I don't know if you know this, but I was sexually abused when I was five years old by a man that I didn't know, a babysitter's son. And he was probably sixteen, seventeen. And I've talked about this many times on my show, but for twenty-five years, I was angry about it. I held on to the anger, the frustration, you know, and I wanted to get back at people. And I wanted to, and I always felt like there was an abuse happening to me, like people were abusing me in life. That was kind of the wound that I didn't heal. And when I started the healing journey ten years ago, I really allowed myself to let that go and forgive myself and forgive...

• 35:03Edith Eger?

  Go through the rage?

• 35:04Lewis Howes?

  All of it, yeah. I mean, it was a process.

• 35:06Edith Eger?

  You cannot forgive without going through the rage.

• 35:10Lewis Howes?

  Oh, man, so I went through it, yeah. And, um, and when I thought about it, I was like, okay, well, maybe this child, maybe this...

• 35:20Edith Eger?

  If you go to therapy, ask your therapist to sit on you.

• 35:25Lewis Howes?

  To sit on me?

• 35:25Edith Eger?

  Yeah, and don't let you get up. You have to fight your real...

• 35:32Lewis Howes?

  Uh huh.

• 35:34Lewis Howes?

  Get them off of you.

• 35:35Edith Eger?

  Give it to him.

• 35:36Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 35:37Edith Eger?

  But good, yeah. Get that thing.

• 35:41Lewis Howes?

  Get it out, yeah.

• 35:42Edith Eger?

  There is a difference between revenge

• 35:45Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 35:46Edith Eger?

  and forgiveness.

• 35:47Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 35:48Edith Eger?

  Revenge gives you a satisfaction.

• 35:53Lewis Howes?

  Momentarily.

• 35:54Edith Eger?

  Very momentarily, beautifully said. Forgiveness gives you freedom.

• 36:01Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 36:03Edith Eger?

  So I had to go back to Auschwitz. To that lion's den and look at the lion in her face to reclaim my innocence, to assign the shame and guilt to the perpetrator.

• 36:18Lewis Howes?

  Not on yourself?

• 36:19Edith Eger?

  No.

• 36:19Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 36:21Edith Eger?

  No more.

• 36:23Edith Eger?

  I'm free.

• 36:23Lewis Howes?

  Hmm. Did you feel free from that moment forward? Or did you have to go back a few times and really let it out more?

• 36:34Edith Eger?

  I think it's a lifelong process.

• 36:37Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 36:37Edith Eger?

  Really, I didn't have to go back to Auschwitz.

• 36:40Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 36:41Edith Eger?

  No, not, not at all, I.

• 36:46Edith Eger?

  One of the things I was asked by physicians,

• 36:51Edith Eger?

  which was interesting, have I ever saw birds in Auschwitz?

• 36:56Lewis Howes?

  Ever saw birds?

• 36:58Edith Eger?

  I never saw birds in Auschwitz.

• 37:01Lewis Howes?

  Why is that?

• 37:02Edith Eger?

  I guess the smell. Birds are probably pick up the terrible smell.

• 37:08Lewis Howes?

  Wow. How long were you there for again? Do you remember?

• 37:13Edith Eger?

  I was there from May until December.

• 37:16Lewis Howes?

  That's a long time.

• 37:18Edith Eger?

  Yes. You know, my daughter called me from Auschwitz and she said, "I'm wearing a fur coat, I'm wearing boots, and I'm freezing. What did you do, Mom?"

• 37:31Lewis Howes?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 37:33Edith Eger?

  I said... I didn't have any boots. I didn't have any fur coat. I, I, I had a little flimsy little something. And I did what I needed to do.

• 37:48Lewis Howes?

  How did you keep your spirit strong enough to survive that?

• 37:51Edith Eger?

  That it's temporary.

• 37:53Lewis Howes?

  You told yourself this is temporary?

• 37:55Edith Eger?

  I don't like it. It's inconvenient.

• 37:59Edith Eger?

  And don't say but. And it's temporary. Because after all, it is temporary.

• 38:07Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 38:08Edith Eger?

  I don't know where we're going from here.

• 38:12Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 38:13Edith Eger?

  Maybe I'm gonna meet my mom and...

• 38:17Edith Eger?

  You see what I miss? That I never had a mother-daughter talk.

• 38:27Lewis Howes?

  You mean after that?

• 38:29Edith Eger?

  Well, when you get married, you talk to your mother about sex, about money, about in-laws. God knows what else.

• 38:37Lewis Howes?

  You didn't have any of those conversations?

• 38:39Edith Eger?

  Any of those conversations. I didn't have.

• 38:42Lewis Howes?

  What do you wish your mom would have told you?

• 38:46Edith Eger?

  It's just for me not to fake anything. To be my true self.

• 38:55Edith Eger?

  You know, my mother told me that

• 38:59Edith Eger?

  I'm glad you have brains because you have no looks. You know that. And so I became a very erudite

• 39:09Edith Eger?

  person. I had my own book club. I read The Interpretation of Dreams by Freud when I was fourteen.

• 39:19Edith Eger?

  Yeah, very different. And nowadays, children are...

• 39:28Edith Eger?

  are not really

• 39:33Edith Eger?

  as curious. I was always very curious. What's gonna happen next? Where I'm gonna go from here?

• 39:44Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 39:45Edith Eger?

  You're very curious. And I think the curiosity helped me to survive.

• 39:51Lewis Howes?

  Wow, the curiosity.

• 39:53Edith Eger?

  The curiosity.

• 39:55Lewis Howes?

  Well, I'm glad I'm a curious person then. You know, I'm always asking questions and very curious.

• 39:59Edith Eger?

  Wonderful.

• 40:00Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 40:01Edith Eger?

  Sometimes you're Jewish. You know, you ask a question and you answer it with a question.

• 40:07Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 40:09Edith Eger?

  How are you? How do you think I am?

• 40:13Lewis Howes?

  I like that. So, something happened this weekend, and you were contemplating whether you wanted to come here.

• 40:20Edith Eger?

  Yeah.

• 40:21Lewis Howes?

  And we got a message yesterday that you weren't gonna come, but then you did wanna come.

• 40:26Edith Eger?

  Yeah.

• 40:26Lewis Howes?

  And I'm so sorry for your loss about your sister.

• 40:30Edith Eger?

  Thank you.

• 40:31Lewis Howes?

  From this weekend. And I wanna know why you wanted to come here after your sister's passing this weekend.

• 40:42Edith Eger?

  To bring you my true self.

• 40:48Edith Eger?

  That I'm grieving and feeling and healing.

• 40:53Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 40:54Edith Eger?

  My sister is with me. The spirit never dies.

• 41:01Edith Eger?

  And I hope I'll be happy in my dead bed. And I'm not gonna ask what the world has given me. But you and I are going to probably ask, how can I contribute to the world that makes us human beings getting together? And see how we can empower each other with our differences. And you can be you, and I can be I.

• 41:36Edith Eger?

  And just empower each other. You do it your way, I do it my way.

• 41:43Lewis Howes?

  When we think about the perspective of what will the world give me versus what can I bring to the world and to humanity?

• 41:53Edith Eger?

  Yes.

• 41:55Lewis Howes?

  Why do some people think, what will the world give me? And what is the trap behind thinking that way? Versus how can I be of service to the world?

• 42:05Edith Eger?

  Well, there are givers and takers. And

• 42:11Edith Eger?

  hopefully, I am a giver. And I will do less blaming.

• 42:21Edith Eger?

  And pushing myself for more and more and more. You know, I just do the best I can, and that's good enough.

• 42:31Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 42:32Edith Eger?

  Good enough is good enough.

• 42:34Lewis Howes?

  Have you been blaming for a while?

• 42:36Edith Eger?

  I have been maybe rough on myself that I could do more than I'm doing. But I am forgiving myself that I could give and do the best I can do. I do get up in the morning, and I look at life as one day. The morning sunshine will not come back. And I'm very comfortable at 95, hoping maybe that I do what's humanly possible. And then hand it over to God.

• 43:16Lewis Howes?

  Wow, it's beautiful. I've got a few more questions I want to ask you. But I wanted to ask the biggest lessons that your sister taught you. Because you both experienced a very tragic event for many months together. You both, you know, learned to heal, and you came together. And you've, you know, you've had a great experience with her. What have been the, what have been the biggest lessons that she taught you? Because she was your older sister, correct?

• 43:48Edith Eger?

  My older sister? I was the youngest in the family.

• 43:53Lewis Howes?

  The most charming, right, in the family?

• 43:58Edith Eger?

  I, I think my parents really wanted a son after two girls. And I came along, and that was not what they wanted. And I felt it. Magda?

• 44:21Edith Eger?

  Was a very good survivor. She was full of jokes.

• 44:29Edith Eger?

  We always talked about food.

• 44:32Edith Eger?

  That's all we talked about. Food. I think

• 44:39Edith Eger?

  she stopped really living.

• 44:45Edith Eger?

  And

• 44:48Edith Eger?

  it's been now perhaps

• 44:55Edith Eger?

  many, many months or maybe years

• 45:01Edith Eger?

  that she gave up her piano. She gave up her piano lessons and she gave up bridge. She was a bridge player. I think she played with Omar Sharif, but I cannot guarantee.

• 45:21Edith Eger?

  But Magda has been

• 45:25Edith Eger?

  extremely brilliant with numbers. So what she did in school, she did your homework, but she didn't want your money. She wants you to bring her food.

• 45:42Edith Eger?

  A roast beef sandwich or god knows. Fried chicken.

• 45:49Edith Eger?

  Fried chicken was always very good. My mother brewed little chickens and it was so delicious.

• 46:00Edith Eger?

  Or Hungarian salami.

• 46:04Edith Eger?

  Have you been to Hungary?

• 46:05Lewis Howes?

  I haven't been. No, I've been to Poland and other places in Europe, but no. Not Hungary.

• 46:12Edith Eger?

  To Hungary.

• 46:12Lewis Howes?

  Off to go.

• 46:13Edith Eger?

  Yeah. I think the Hungarians are

• 46:19Edith Eger?

  good survivors. Is that all?

• 46:26Lewis Howes?

  What's the thing you're holding?

• 46:27Edith Eger?

  There is a song in Hungary.

• 46:31Edith Eger?

  That the woman is best when she's beaten up.

• 46:37Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 46:38Edith Eger?

  It's not very kind.

• 46:39Lewis Howes?

  Yes, not kind.

• 46:41Edith Eger?

  Yeah.

• 46:42Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 46:42Edith Eger?

  Yeah, well. Hungarian women learned how to deal with men and give them compliments even when they don't deserve it. So women are wise, not smart, but wise. How to go through the man's stomach and make him the food that he likes. Like a certain roast beef that you make in Hungarian style. Or the chicken with a lot of paprika on it and garlic on it. I make a very good garlic chicken.

• 47:27Lewis Howes?

  You do, right now?

• 47:28Edith Eger?

  I make it.

• 47:29Lewis Howes?

  Next time I'm in San Diego, I'm gonna get some of your chicken.

• 47:32Edith Eger?

  Tell me and I will...

• 47:34Lewis Howes?

  I'm there for the chicken.

• 47:36Edith Eger?

  I'll do the...

• 47:37Lewis Howes?

  The chicken and a dance with you.

• 47:40Edith Eger?

  Okay.

• 47:41Lewis Howes?

  Yes, a little salsa, yeah.

• 47:43Edith Eger?

  It's okay.

• 47:47Lewis Howes?

  What would you say is the thing you hold in your heart dearest about your sister? The thing you'll take with you?

• 47:53Edith Eger?

  Her humor.

• 47:54Lewis Howes?

  Her humor, yeah.

• 47:55Edith Eger?

  Her humor.

• 47:56Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 47:59Edith Eger?

  She had a lot of humor, a lot of humor about men and women.

• 48:12Edith Eger?

  I didn't have at all. And I don't have that kind of sense of humor.

• 48:18Lewis Howes?

  You've got a great sense of humor.

• 48:21Edith Eger?

  I do what?

• 48:22Lewis Howes?

  Different.

• 48:22Edith Eger?

  Different.

• 48:23Lewis Howes?

  Yes. I have a question about your secret to living a long, healthy life. And with experiencing pain, tragedy, trauma, loss, sadness, you continue to thrive in your life.

• 48:41Edith Eger?

  See, when you were touched inappropriately.

• 48:48Edith Eger?

  You probably would have come to me and say, "Edie, I don't know how to tell you that, because you went to Auschwitz." And my answer would be, "I knew the enemy. You didn't. Don't minimize it. You have the right to be angry, but not to hold on to it or live by it. You gotta go through the rage, scream it out. But don't get addicted to it. Don't do anything in excess, drinking, smoking.

• 49:30Lewis Howes?

  Right. Raging, yeah.

• 49:33Edith Eger?

  Raging. Rage is fear.

• 49:38Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 49:39Edith Eger?

  Fear. And the biggest fear of a child is the fear of abandonment. That is important. Especially in midlife. That is not a crisis, but a transition. You don't have your periods anymore, but you know, who wants to have babies anyway? No problem. But I work with midlife issues a lot on a daily basis. And it's a new beginning.

• 50:24Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 50:25Edith Eger?

  It's a new beginning. You become older and wiser, not older than sin.

• 50:33Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 50:34Edith Eger?

  So you're gonna write another book?

• 50:37Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, working on another book, which has a lot of teachings about healing in the book as well, so, and overcoming that. But that's, that's part of the vision. But I'm, I'm curious for you though, what, what do you feel like has been one of the keys to living a long, healthy life and with challenges and tragedies?

• 50:57Edith Eger?

  Not to lie to yourself and not to... Not to try to please other people. Give up the need for approval of others. I think that's number one. If you like me, fine. If you don't, that's okay. It doesn't mean I was rejected.

• 51:24Edith Eger?

  Rejection is an English word that people make up to express a feeling when you don't get what you want. Give up the drama.

• 51:36Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 51:37Edith Eger?

  No one can reject me but me.

• 51:41Lewis Howes?

  That's true.

• 51:43Edith Eger?

  Don't say I was rejected. Nobody has any power.

• 51:49Lewis Howes?

  But you can reject yourself.

• 51:51Edith Eger?

  You can.

• 51:51Lewis Howes?

  And that's the biggest betrayal. If you do it to yourself.

• 51:55Edith Eger?

  You better have a talk with yourself.

• 52:00Edith Eger?

  Find that little boy who is still crying and looking for a good, loving parent.

• 52:06Lewis Howes?

  Yes, yes.

• 52:10Edith Eger?

  And be a good mommy to you.

• 52:14Lewis Howes?

  Do you feel like you've done-

• 52:15Edith Eger?

  Eat your spinach.

• 52:17Lewis Howes?

  Do you feel like you've been a good parent to yourself over the years?

• 52:23Edith Eger?

  I could have been better.

• 52:28Edith Eger?

  But the two questions are important. Number one, when did your childhood end?

• 52:38Edith Eger?

  If you're a child of an immigrant, you end up taking care of your parents.

• 52:44Lewis Howes?

  You never had a childhood.

• 52:45Edith Eger?

  You never had a childhood. Very important. The second question is, would you like to be married to you?

• 52:57Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, that's a good one.

• 52:58Edith Eger?

  Yes.

• 52:59Lewis Howes?

  You gotta reflect.

• 53:00Edith Eger?

  I ask people to ask themselves.

• 53:01Lewis Howes?

  What do people say, usually?

• 53:04Edith Eger?

  No, no, no, no.

• 53:09Edith Eger?

  It's up to you.

• 53:10Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 53:10Edith Eger?

  Who do you attract?

• 53:12Lewis Howes?

  That's true. That's true. Is there anything else you'd like to share today? Anything else that's opening up for you that you want to talk about?

• 53:24Edith Eger?

  My 95th birthday party.

• 53:27Lewis Howes?

  When is it? Was recently?

• 53:30Edith Eger?

  Was a couple of weeks ago.

• 53:31Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 53:32Edith Eger?

  I was, thank you.

• 53:33Lewis Howes?

  Ninety-five?

• 53:34Edith Eger?

  Thank you.

• 53:35Lewis Howes?

  Feeling alive, ninety-five?

• 53:38Edith Eger?

  Feeling young.

• 53:39Lewis Howes?

  Young?

• 53:40Edith Eger?

  Young.

• 53:41Lewis Howes?

  Energetic, passionate?

• 53:42Edith Eger?

  That's right, dancing.

• 53:44Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 53:45Edith Eger?

  And celebrating. So the question is, how can you turn life into a constant celebration?

• 53:53Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm. Mm, I love that. How do you do that?

• 53:58Edith Eger?

  Every moment is precious.

• 54:04Edith Eger?

  Never throw out a piece of bread.

• 54:11Edith Eger?

  Only buy what you eat.

• 54:15Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 54:16Edith Eger?

  Cook for yourself. Don't go to a restaurant so much.

• 54:20Lewis Howes?

  Mm.

• 54:21Edith Eger?

  Because it has a lot of salt and a lot of sugar.

• 54:25Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 54:27Lewis Howes?

  Tastes so good, though.

• 54:29Edith Eger?

  Cook, cook.

• 54:31Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 54:32Edith Eger?

  Cook for yourself.

• 54:33Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 54:35Edith Eger?

  And enjoy.

• 54:36Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 54:37Edith Eger?

  Every moment in life.

• 54:42Lewis Howes?

  That's beautiful.

• 54:43Edith Eger?

  Don't procrastinate. And get rid of perfectionism.

• 54:47Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 54:50Lewis Howes?

  I love those.

• 54:51Edith Eger?

  Yeah, you're human. You're gonna make mistakes. That's fine.

• 54:55Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm. You've got a couple of amazing books. The Choice and The Gift, which I'm a big fan of. And I know for years you said you didn't have anything to write about, but those books are incredible. I highly recommend people getting them. Oprah loved them as well and, you know, has shared them out and talked to you about those. It's really impacted a lot of people in life. So I really appreciate and acknowledge you for how you continue to thrive, how you continue to serve and give back to so many of us in our lives. So I really appreciate and acknowledge you.

• 55:31Edith Eger?

  Thank you.

• 55:32Lewis Howes?

  Dr. Edith, for your service and your wisdom.

• 55:37Lewis Howes?

  Your joy. I want people to get your books. We'll have it all linked up for people. But you also have a course, which is really inspiring as well.

• 55:46Edith Eger?

  Yes, we have a wonderful course. And I think we have now about 2,000 people who signed up. But I think it's very important, hopefully for me, to write a book for teenagers.

• 56:03Lewis Howes?

  Are you going to be doing that now?

• 56:04Edith Eger?

  I would like to do that. I'd like to see that teenagers can become ambassadors.

• 56:15Lewis Howes?

  That's beautiful.

• 56:16Edith Eger?

  Ambassadors for peace.

• 56:19Lewis Howes?

  Teens of the future.

• 56:20Edith Eger?

  And goodwill.

• 56:22Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 56:23Edith Eger?

  I think we need to take the children seriously and have conversations with them that is age appropriate.

• 56:32Lewis Howes?

  Yes, yes.

• 56:35Lewis Howes?

  I can't wait for that book. You'll have to let me know so we can have you back on for that book as well.

• 56:39Edith Eger?

  Exactly.

• 56:40Lewis Howes?

  The course, I know you have a free course about forgiveness as well. So I want people to get the free course. And we'll have it all linked up on your site, DrEdithEgger.com. And...

• 56:52Edith Eger?

  Forgiveness has a greater to do with letting go.

• 57:00Edith Eger?

  Letting go. So my definition of love is the ability to let go.

• 57:09Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. Whatever you're holding on to, let it go.

• 57:13Edith Eger?

  Let it go.

• 57:14Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 57:15Edith Eger?

  Not going back and you begin.

• 57:20Edith Eger?

  So you're pregnant. And you're gonna give birth to the you that was meant to be free. Freedom is everything.

• 57:31Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 57:32Edith Eger?

  Freedom from the concentration camp that is in your own mind. And the key is in your pocket.

• 57:41Lewis Howes?

  Wow. That's a part of your free course that people can get right now. And then if they want even more, you've got your advanced course, Unlocking Your Potential. So I want people to get both of those.

• 57:52Edith Eger?

  Good.

• 57:52Lewis Howes?

  That's beautiful. Okay, I have two final questions. Do you have time for two more questions?

• 57:57Edith Eger?

  Sure.

• 57:57Lewis Howes?

  Okay. I believe I asked you this last time, but I want to ask you again. And it's called the Three Truths question.

• 58:07Edith Eger?

  Okay.

• 58:07Lewis Howes?

  So it's a hypothetical question.

• 58:10Edith Eger?

  Truth is all subjective.

• 58:12Lewis Howes?

  Exactly.

• 58:13Edith Eger?

  Mine's true, yours is not.

• 58:14Lewis Howes?

  Exactly, exactly. So I want you to imagine a hypothetical scenario. For whatever reason, you have to take all of your books and conversations and courses and work with you somewhere. We don't have access to your content.

• 58:32Edith Eger?

  Right.

• 58:33Lewis Howes?

  And all we have access to are these three truths, these three lessons that you've learned in your life that you'd like to share with the world. What would be those three truths that you could share? If you could only share three things, and we wouldn't have access to any other content you've created, what would be those three truths?

• 58:51Edith Eger?

  Suffering makes me stronger. Become your own good parent to you. And find your little child in you who is crying. And asking for a good parent, and you show up for that child. The little boy, the little girl. And how, anything you do, ask yourself whether it's empowering you.

• 59:34Edith Eger?

  Or deplete you.

• 59:37Lewis Howes?

  These are three powerful truths.

• 59:38Edith Eger?

  And don't say, "Just this time, nobody's gonna find out." "I'm gonna have this drink."

• 59:48Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, is it empowering or depleting you? You need to know whether it's really important

• 59:55Edith Eger?

  that you become your own good parent.

• 59:58Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, that's beautiful.

• 59:59Edith Eger?

  And then, whether you're going to act upon it or not. Positive thinking has nothing to do with anything unless it's followed with a positive action.

• 1:00:14Lewis Howes?

  That's beautiful. Well, Dr. Edith, I want to acknowledge you. I appreciate you for how you continue to show up, how you continue to serve, how you continue to give.

• 1:00:23Edith Eger?

  That's what it's all about.

• 1:00:25Lewis Howes?

  Your joy, your generosity, your attention, your time, and your wisdom. So I really acknowledge and appreciate you. I'm so grateful for you. And I can't wait to have some chicken from you soon.

• 1:00:38Edith Eger?

  That's right.

• 1:00:38Lewis Howes?

  I'm gonna come and get some chicken from you.

• 1:00:40Edith Eger?

  We're going to have chicken together. But most of all, we're going to be colleagues.

• 1:00:47Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 1:00:48Edith Eger?

  And recognize that none of the academic knowledge really does any good unless you really have the knowledge of your life's work that you chose not to be a victim or the victim as ever.

• 1:01:08Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, that's beautiful. My final question. What's your definition of greatness?

• 1:01:20Edith Eger?

  Is to show up for life.

• 1:01:23Lewis Howes?

  There you go. Thank you so much.

• 1:01:25Edith Eger?

  Thank you.

• 1:01:26Lewis Howes?

  Appreciate you. Thank you.

• 1:01:27Edith Eger?

  God bless.

• 1:01:28Lewis Howes?

  I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links. And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally, as well as ad free listening, then make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review. I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward. And I want to remind you, if no one has told you lately, that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And

• 1:02:12Lewis Howes?

  now it's time to go out there and do something great.