649 Make a Comeback - Body and Mind Training with Brooke Ence

“YOU HAVEN'T LOST CHANCES TO BE A BETTER PERSON.” Are you aware you’re constantly being judged? I bet you are. Are you letting it affect the the way you live your life? I really hope not. Today, it’s so much easier to feel the burden of judgment. With social media, our lives are always in the spotlight. There are so many people who will hate on us, and the more successful we are the more haters there usually are. You can’t listen to them. You just need to follow your heart and brush off their comments. Focus in on listening to those that you really do care about, not some stranger that you’ve never heard of. I have a special guest who knows more about this than most people: Brooke Ence. Brooke is a fitness and Crossfit icon. She also appeared in Wonder Woman as an Amazonian warrior and she's just getting started. Unfortunately, she’s always received a lot of criticism in her life. Her love of working out has meant she doesn’t have a traditional female body. She can come off as intimidating to people, and there’s always been a lot of backlash on social media because of it. Last year she suffered a spinal injury that nearly took her life’s passion away from her. She decided not to let it ruin everything she has built. Through pacing herself she’s learned to get back into the competition world and has been making a massive recovery in such a short amount of time. Sadly, this pacing of herself has lead to even more people criticizing her. They’ve been trying to make her feel like she’s burnt out or past her prime - but I get the feeling she’s going to come back even stronger and better in the future. Instead of listening to the naysayers she’s learned to focus her attention to people that truly know her, support her, and gauge her success on their reaction. On this episode of The School of Greatness, Brooke really opens up about her injury and the struggles she’s gone through as a woman focusing on her passion as opposed to society’s standards. She really is an inspiration to all people -- don't miss Episode 649. Some Questions I Ask: How did you get your injury? (7:48) Did people think you could come back like you did? (23:18) Has your build had an affect your confidence? (29:12) What advice do you give to people that focus on other people’s words all the time? (42:16) How do you push through every time when it hurts? (51:20) Do you feel relief that you don’t have to train as hard for the games? (53:42) In This Episode You Will Learn: How quickly Brooke had her surgery (20:32) The ways Brooke is more secure today (26:26) How Brooke dealt with the lies she was telling herself (37:15) How she sets herself up to have the best workout (48:28) Her vision moving forward (52:03) The thing she’s most proud of since her surgery (1:02:23) Get more from Lewis! Get my New York Times Bestselling book, Make Money Easy! Get The Greatness Mindset audiobook on SpotifyText Lewis AIYouTubeInstagramWebsiteTiktokFacebookX

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Lewis Howes?

  This is episode number 649 with fitness and CrossFit icon Brooke Ence. Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin.

• 0:32Lewis Howes?

  Billie Jean King said, "Champions keep playing until they get it right." Have you ever felt in your life that you were an imposter, that you weren't supposed to be where you're at? Or have you ever felt overwhelmed and exhausted from the opinions of others? From other people telling you you're not good enough, that you look a certain way and you shouldn't look that way, that you're not talented enough, that you're not smart enough? And have they posted it online? Do they talk about it in front of you? Do they talk about you behind your face and you hear about it from other people? Has this ever affected you from achieving what you want? Today, we've got Brooke Ence on. She's an elite CrossFit athlete, entrepreneur, social media fitness icon.

• 1:17Lewis Howes?

  In 2015, she placed first in the California region, went on to place 14th at the 2015 CrossFit Games in her rookie year. And since then, she's built a following for her reputation as an elite competitor and her passion for inspiring others to achieve their goals. She's no stranger to adversity, however. Brooke has returned to elite competition this year after undergoing spinal surgery through her neck last year in March of 2017. And her incredible journey of how she's overcome all these obstacles, all the mental barriers, all the conversations of doubt, to coming back and competing at an elite level is unbelievable.

• 1:56Lewis Howes?

  She's also went on to have appearances as an Amazon woman in the blockbuster movies Wonder Woman and Justice League. And she's done incredible things in business as well. And today, we really dive in deep about how to overcome that story in your mind, those conversations that keep you back from doing what you want. How she's done that. You know, she's looked a certain way her entire life, and she's constantly been criticized for her body, for her physique, and been told that she shouldn't look a certain way, that she always has been. She's overcome constant challenges and obstacles mentally, physically, emotionally, to get to where she's at. And she breaks down the whole process of how she's done it, and how you can do it as well. Before we dive in, I want to give a shout out to our Fan of the Week.

• 2:41Lewis Howes?

  This is Annalisa Brown, who said, "The day I ran across this podcast, something completely changed in my mindset and inspired me to change the game in my daily life. The guests all bring light to difficult situations and life, while teaching through their own struggles. The world needs more of this. Life is hard, and without realness, it can be hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel." Thankful, grateful, and blessed for this incredible podcast. Lewis Howes, thanks for creating this game changer. So, Annalisa Brown, thank you for leaving a review over on iTunes. You are the Fan of the Week. And if you guys haven't left a review yet, we've got over 3,000-plus 5-star reviews. Just open up your podcast app right now.

• 3:26Lewis Howes?

  You can do it really quickly. Or head over to iTunes and leave a review on The School of Greatness for your chance to be shouted out as the Fan of the Week. Again, a big thank you to our sponsors, and I am excited about this episode. It's all about overcoming those mental barriers that hold you back, and a powerful story from the one and only Brooke Ence.

• 3:53Lewis Howes?

  Welcome, everyone, to the School of Greatness Podcast. We have the incredible Brooke Ence in the house. Good to see you, fresh off the Regionals, where you've got tattoos and tape on you still. Pulled hamstrings, shoulders.

• 4:08Speaker 01

  It's not because I don't shower. I shower, I just sometimes don't like scrub.

• 4:14Lewis Howes?

  Well, it looks like it's fused onto your skin tattoo, but it's all good. Now, we met about, I don't know, three or four months ago, I think, through a mutual friend of ours, JP, and he said, I gotta connect with you and, and really learn more about you as an individual. And when we talked, I learned you have an incredible story, that you had, you had surgery on your neck, and you've got screws and a plate in your neck. And then you decided to start training right afterwards, essentially, a few months, to come back to the CrossFit Games. You were in the CrossFit Games in 2015. I think you placed top 15 there, and then you got a neck injury, had surgery, and you've been training again, which is crazy.

• 4:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 4:53Lewis Howes?

  And how did you get the surgery again, or how did you get the injury?

• 4:56Speaker 01

  I don't know how long I had it. My doctor said he thinks for sure I probably had like a bulge disc for a long time. There's no real way of knowing, but the more I started to sort of connect the dots of things that may have felt off, or like the tweaks that I just always had, you know, like I feel like every athlete might have something that they just, that's what they work with, or they need to warm up extra for that part of their body, you know, and that's just kinda how it is. I started to remember things. I'm like, huh.

• 5:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, that could have been from this, you know, but I, in December of 2016, yeah, I had like a active recovery type day. It was just a gymnastics day. It was like super low, like lowish volume. I had already done a good amount of gymnastics, but all I was doing was some transition work from standing to headstand. So this could have been at home, it could have been at yoga, it could have been anytime. And I remember that you bend at the hip and basically lower yourself to almost like a downward dog type position, right? And then you come to headstand and pick your legs up really nice and controlled, and then you lower your, your feet, and then you push. Pushing back into a downward dog to come to standing.

• 6:09Speaker 01

  And I felt a pinch in my back and I thought I had just slipped a rib, which I've done many a times, like, I mean, many of times in dance in in high school, like, if I were really tight and I held my breath during one move, it might slip a rib out. And so I thought that's what it was.

• 6:25Lewis Howes?

  Dislocate a rib?

• 6:26Speaker 01

  So your your ribs on the on like the back, they kind of float.

• 6:30Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 6:30Speaker 01

  There's like little areas where they kind of sit. So sometimes you can get that and it will kind of move a little bit. And you'll feel sort of a sharp. If you take a deep breath, you'll feel a sharp pinch or things like that. And usually if you take two tennis balls, you can tape them together or in like put it in a sock and like tie a knot and just start at the top of your spine and just slowly lower it like um lay on the ground and lower it down. You can get to a point where you'll feel that really tightness and you just sort of relax into that position and it kind of can get things to like go back where they go. I had a physio appointment, no chiropractic appointment that day. And I told him, I was like, oh, I popped, I slipped a rib out and I was gonna get adjusted.

• 7:12Speaker 01

  And so he was trying to adjust me and I adjust very easily, like I can take a deep breath. And things will kind of move or pop where they're supposed to go. And he I he was adjusting me and I was like, no, it's still like it still was bothering me and it was kind of one of those things you're like, you gotta kind of like have to move like this.

• 7:29Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 7:30Speaker 01

  And so then the next day I saw my physio um to do a little bit of cupping and acupuncture and I was like my, I think I slipped a rib out yesterday and I got went to the chiropractor and couldn't get it back in, you know, so he's feeling on me and trying to like manipulate more muscle tissue work to try and get things to relax. Didn't really go away. So everyday training kind of after that, this is right before I went home for Christmas. I'd get up in the morning, I'd be a little bit uncomfortable and then I'd get on a foam roller at the gym. And I'd start with the foam roller across the top of my back. And I'd put my hands behind my head and I'd sort of roll down my back and my back would all pop and then I would just finish by pulling my chin to my chest. And I would pop and I was like, oh, okay, that felt so much better. I'd work out and I was fine.

• 8:15Speaker 01

  Went home. My mom picked me from the airport, totally fine. Went to her house, totally fine. Went to bed. Woke up the next morning and I was supposed to train, I was gonna train. We were gonna film, so just like vlogging. And I was foaming by my parents' fireplace and I started to like just lock up. Like across my back, across my neck. And um, I could not figure out what was going on. It was getting worse and worse and it was so bad that like if I turned my head to left or right or up or down or like moved, I had sort of this like definitely a nerve pain, like that kind of sharp burning type pain that was coming down from the top of my head. But mostly I was feeling it in my arm. It wasn't in my neck, it wasn't in my chest or anything like that.

• 8:58Speaker 01

  I'm not a doctor, so maybe if I were, I'd be like, oh, there's probably something going on. But I just, it was in my arm. And it was so bad I couldn't really move. My sister had just had back surgery. And um, runs in the family. And she had like muscle relaxers. So she gave me one of those. I remember I was making breakfast and I finally got to where I could sort of move. So I warmed up.

• 9:24Lewis Howes?

  Oh my gosh.

• 9:25Speaker 01

  To work out. And uh, you have to remember too, it's like, I'm trying to train as much as possible cause this was my comeback year. So twenty seventeen was my comeback year. And I was strong and I was fit. And all of a sudden I couldn't really move very well. But worked out. Didn't really feel super great. I thought, you know what, I must have slept wrong on, on the bed. I must have slept with a bad pillow or slept wrong, okay. So I didn't sleep on the mattress that night, I slept on the floor. In the living room, like more of a hard surface and that was really bad because again, I didn't know it was my neck. So I'm sleeping on the ground or I've got like a pillow, so I'm like, you know, not super supported here.

• 10:07Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 10:08Speaker 01

  And it was so painful. I'm a grown woman, just falling, like just sobbing. And I go into my parents' room. My dad gets out of his bed, I take another muscle relaxer, I get in where he was sleeping. Trying to able to sleep, we called the chiropractor the next day, cause I again, tried to do a little bit of some rowing the next day and I remember looking in the mirror and my whole right side was sort of like hyped up. So something was spasming, something was happening. And I went to the chiropractor. And we never really thought this because I didn't do anything like I just woke up.

• 10:44Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 10:44Speaker 01

  And um, and I didn't do anything weeks prior, like I not, it dropped bar on me, I didn't fall, I didn't do anything like that. And this just kind of went on for a long time. I got home, I was kind of laying off upper body type stuff, so I started to feel a little bit better. But every morning, at the time, my bed, my mattress was on the floor.

• 11:06Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 11:06Speaker 01

  So I would roll out of bed to like all fours. And I couldn't move my head, so then I would like get to standing and my husband would have to get out and pop my back. And now it makes sense, right? Creating space allowed some relief.

• 11:20Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 11:21Speaker 01

  So he'd pop my back and I would sort of move and I remember like making breakfast like this. I'd like, we were scrambling eggs, but I couldn't move my chin, so everything was like looking down or looking up and.

• 11:35Speaker 01

  I let this go on for a long time because I really just thought it was nerves, like impingement.

• 11:40Lewis Howes?

  And you kept training too.

• 11:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:42Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 11:43Speaker 01

  I was getting cupped, I have photos of like my entire back just, I'm like, I just need to create space, right? There's just a nerve's impinged, it really was impinged right here. I finally saw my Rolfers, so a Rolfers, are you familiar?

• 11:58Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, I've done Rolfing.

• 11:59Speaker 01

  They're amazing and the guy I work with in Santa Cruz, Brian Johnson, is incredible. And I went and saw him and I hadn't seen him in like a year and a half. So he starts talking to me and I'm like just telling him everything I've already told you. I'm pretty sure I slipped a rib, yada, yada, yada, and he, me, it was like, okay, stop, and I lay down. He starts feeling down my spine and he feels like right, kind of on the backside of where it's at. And he said, the way the tissue felt was as if I may have pulled a muscle. Nothing hurt me, but he was able to get some like fascia and some, some tissue to sort of move. And that night was the first time I slept in like a month and a half. Like I remember I woke up and I couldn't believe how much better I had felt.

• 12:45Speaker 01

  So to me, I'm thinking, I, at the time, right before that, I had scheduled an MRI. I was seeing my chiropractor four days a week.

• 12:52Lewis Howes?

  Oh my gosh.

• 12:53Speaker 01

  And I should have seen him every day, like, that's what I wanted, was every day. Finally, I scheduled MRI, but then I saw Brian and I felt better. So I'm thinking, I got work done and I felt better. That's a good sign, you know, it's like, well, if it is a pulled muscle, well, it just needs time to heal. And I need to lay off it.

• 13:12Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 13:13Speaker 01

  You know, so canceled my MRI, kept training. And now in my head, I'm thinking, well, it's uncomfortable or it's inflamed, you know, because, but, but I'm okay, I'm not doing anything worse to myself.

• 13:27Speaker 01

  The day that they announced the first workout, I was still in just really bad shape. At this point, I couldn't hold myself on a rope, I couldn't hold my body weight on the pull-up bar. I couldn't spray a hairspray bottle, I couldn't use my thumb to text, I couldn't do a lot of basic things. And to me, like, when I would, I'd go running. And after I would, like, my hand would sort of, like, cramp up and I would just shake it off, shake it off, stretch it out, like, no big deal. The day they announced it, I had an appointment with Brian, I went in to see Brian, I'm like, dude, you gotta do something for me. Because this starts tomorrow, they announced the first workout today, like.

• 14:05Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 14:06Speaker 01

  I need some inflammation to go down, I need to be able to use. This is for the open. So he's like, okay, let's, he was working on me, he said, we'll start from the hands and move up, because before, he just went straight to here and then moved down. Well, same thing, after he finished, this was the first time that when he was done, I didn't feel better. I still felt like I'm just aching, I mean, I was bruised all down my tricep because I constantly, I constantly was rubbing it myself, or digging into it with a lacrosse ball, or making the boys, my, all my guy friends, just rub it, it hurt so bad, I would drive. I'd have to put my arm on the, up here, I'd put it on the ceiling, I'd hold it across here, like, I could not find a comfortable place for it.

• 14:50Speaker 01

  And because it was not feeling better, right after I left his office, I called, scheduled the MRI. They got me in that day, so I drove over, got that. The next morning, my chiropractor was reading it for me and it's.

• 15:08Speaker 01

  I was in denial, okay? He basically just starts going into this full conversation of like, you need to worry, you need to think about your quality of life. You cannot compete this year. And I fully was like, I don't care what you say.

• 15:22Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 15:23Speaker 01

  I'm competing. Whatever it is, okay, it's a bulge. And he's like, no, it's like significantly bulging. I'm not a spine doctor, but I, and I can't tell you what my opinion per se, but you need to, you need to rethink if you're gonna compete this year. So I immediately sent it to my coaches. One of my coaches is a ears, nose and throat surgeon, and he's from Louisiana. And so he also sent it to his buddy who's an ortho out there. They started calling and calling and calling to get me in to see, um, Dr. Ivan Chang. He's up at Stanford and he's like the spine guy up there for like all the forty niners, like a lot of athletics. And they called every, over and over and over again.

• 16:07Speaker 01

  And finally, his office called and they got me in for an appointment Monday morning, his very first appointment. And Monday at five, I think is like, or four is the last time you can submit your score for workout one. So basically, I had already done the workout. I did it anyways. It was really crappy. And then I drove over Monday, saw him. And the plan would be that I would do it again if I needed to and get it submitted, depending on what he had to say. And he, like with the MRI up, and he even took it to his colleagues in hopes that they could say, oh, no, we, you know, do this, do this. But it was not good. And he basically just said, he showed, he pointed at it and he said,

• 16:51Speaker 01

  there's no more room for your spinal cord. Like in that area, there's no more room for it. It's being pressed as far as it will go. And so it literally looked like someone was like pinching it in half. And he said, if it decides to herniate anymore, like if it tries to, he's like, you'll have severe permanent damage. He's like, I wouldn't even go much longer without having it fixed because you can't, it's like one of those things you just don't know. Like I could trip or,

• 17:21Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 17:21Speaker 01

  Like even though I'd been training and doing all this stuff, like I could do one thing and my body could decide to let it go. And it's like,

• 17:28Lewis Howes?

  Done.

• 17:30Speaker 01

  There's no real knowing like what would have happened and it was up so high. So that was really sad.

• 17:36Lewis Howes?

  So did you have the surgery right after or what?

• 17:38Speaker 01

  No, that was mid-February and we scheduled it, it was for March 31st.

• 17:44Lewis Howes?

  Did you keep training?

• 17:45Speaker 01

  No.

• 17:46Lewis Howes?

  So no more training?

• 17:47Speaker 01

  No, upper body. I did other stuff, but I literally stopped like going overhead.

• 17:51Lewis Howes?

  And using your neck and yeah.

• 17:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, and I think the realization too of like-

• 17:55Lewis Howes?

  Handstand pushups and just slamming on the head.

• 17:57Speaker 01

  And like, I mean, that's the thing too. It's like, I had been getting adjusted four days a week, getting my neck popped four days a week. I was, I was snatching, I was clean and jerking. So snatching, not really too big of a deal. There's, you're not bringing any weight to your shoulders, but anything else where I'm bringing weight to my shoulders or hands, doing hands and pushups or whatever. I remember wall balls, you know like what a wall ball is? Prior to this, I couldn't, I couldn't look up because it was so painful. So I'd have to wall ball like this and just guess. It's like I would, I would do one and like do like a full lean back to catch it.

• 18:41Speaker 01

  So it was um-

• 18:43Lewis Howes?

  I hated wall balls.

• 18:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:45Lewis Howes?

  It's the worst. Wow. So you got, so you got surgery afterwards about a month later?

• 18:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 18:50Lewis Howes?

  And then what happened?

• 18:52Speaker 01

  And then it was just the road to recovery, basically.

• 18:54Lewis Howes?

  So they cut open your throat here?

• 18:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, they, they cut me here and then they basically take everything and move it over to the side.

• 19:01Lewis Howes?

  Crazy.

• 19:02Speaker 01

  And then they took the disc out and then did a, um, a bone graft, they put in bone, cadaver bone.

• 19:08Lewis Howes?

  From where?

• 19:09Speaker 01

  And not mine, cadaver. Yeah. And then a, a plate and four screws.

• 19:14Lewis Howes?

  Crazy.

• 19:15Speaker 01

  And then it was just, I wore a neck brace for six weeks. I couldn't drive for six weeks and for obvious reasons, right? I mean it's like-

• 19:30Speaker 01

  Couldn't turn my head. I couldn't move my head for that long and um.

• 19:34Lewis Howes?

  This was like a year ago, right?

• 19:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:35Lewis Howes?

  A couple of months?

• 19:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, so and then I basically, a few days after having surgery, the only exercise I could do is like I'd sit on a bike and I could use my legs. And then I would do air squats.

• 19:46Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 19:47Speaker 01

  It's pretty much it. Walking lunges. That was it for a long time. Because they needed that to take. So.

• 19:54Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, of course.

• 19:55Speaker 01

  It's great. Like just like gravity. It's like I couldn't bend at the waist.

• 19:58Lewis Howes?

  No.

• 19:59Speaker 01

  So all my friends had a, they got a real big kick out of like standing behind me and calling my name. Cause I would be like this. Like full turnaround and um trying to pick anything up off the floor.

• 20:10Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 20:10Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 20:10Lewis Howes?

  It's a full squat.

• 20:13Speaker 01

  Yes. Fill around on the ground.

• 20:16Lewis Howes?

  And so now you had a pretty good recovery because now you've come back. You've been training hard and you did regionals. How has that been? Do people think you'd be able to come back and start training like this or?

• 20:25Speaker 01

  I think most people didn't.

• 20:27Lewis Howes?

  Mm hmm.

• 20:28Speaker 01

  And then some people that maybe don't, didn't know like what had happened. Maybe look at how I did at regionals is like, a couple of things. And I feel like this is like a very small percentage of people, but they either think that I, all of the other stuff I have going on, like I like business.

• 20:47Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 20:48Speaker 01

  Is.

• 20:49Lewis Howes?

  Holding you back.

• 20:49Speaker 01

  It's too important.

• 20:50Lewis Howes?

  It's distracting you.

• 20:51Speaker 01

  Yeah. And um, or they think that, yeah, I'm just not focused enough and I'm just not good enough.

• 20:57Lewis Howes?

  Mm hmm.

• 20:58Speaker 01

  So I think that's a much smaller percentage of people, but also too like, I don't really care.

• 21:03Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 21:04Speaker 01

  It does affect me because I don't want, it's, it is very difficult knowing like what I've gone through and wanting people to understand. But I can't, everyone's just not going to understand. And so that was something that I think I really had to deal with like mentally and like preparing myself mentally for regionals of just.

• 21:32Speaker 01

  Knowing that I have to not care what people will think. And you can, oh, it's very easy to like say, I, I, I don't, and I don't want to care. But there's still a piece inside me because I'm a competitor and I, and I love to like, help people and, and make people happy. I want to care, like, I, I want you to think of me in a good way. I want you to know that, like, I've worked my butt off and all I've been doing is training and listening to my surgeons, like, where I was and where I am in my recovery, or how I placed at regionals was not a lack of effort. It was not a lack of, of trying or caring or time. It was a lack of time under tension. It was a lack of, it's, that's just where I'm at.

• 22:17Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, recovery.

• 22:17Speaker 01

  At this point in my recovery. And so luckily, I mean, I've got quite the tribe that I really felt their support during regionals, which was quite amazing. And I was telling, talking to my friend about it the other day, of just, like, I just hit a million followers on Instagram. And, um, which I think is, is very cool. I think that social media totally sucks, to be honest.

• 22:43Lewis Howes?

  Why does it suck for you?

• 22:44Speaker 01

  I just, not for me, just like in general. Like, with, with anything that's really good, it's equally can be as bad. I just think that it is, it's tough. And like the stuff that I read sometimes that is so unbelievably hurtful, it's really hard. And I think more times than prior to having this amazing platform, I really have to be secure with myself. I think because of all of this and because of the type of person that I am and what I've been through, um, I am more secure with myself than I ever was before.

• 23:23Speaker 01

  Even with more hurtful things being said or really just misunderstood things or...

• 23:30Lewis Howes?

  How are you more secure now?

• 23:32Speaker 01

  I am much more confident in, in who I am and my body and...

• 23:42Speaker 01

  What I'm doing.

• 23:43Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 23:43Speaker 01

  Whereas before and it's it's it's more so I've just had so much mental growth.

• 23:47Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 23:47Speaker 01

  And that's not because anyone else did that for me. It's because I've been through some very tough things the past few years. And I wanted it. I was willing to read the books to seek the help, to talk to the people. And now it matters a lot for me to to be vulnerable and to share my story with people and be willing to talk about the things that maybe are really hard to talk about because the messages that I get on the daily of the men and women and boys and girls that I am affecting and I am helping, that's is what is the most important to me. And that's where I say like, social media kinda sucks and it's just because it is equally as bad as it is good, but it's so unbelievably powerful.

• 24:31Speaker 01

  You can be so powerful.

• 24:33Lewis Howes?

  Mm hmm.

• 24:34Speaker 01

  And it sucks because there's people that have power that I feel like they shouldn't. You know, based on one, the lack of caring or doing things to affect people in a positive way, the lack of using their their power or their platform for good. And that could be that they genuinely just don't think about that, or they genuinely, they're a little bit lazy on that and it's, people get busy. People have a lot of stuff going on and sometimes it's hard to remember all the things you wanna talk about or all the people you wanna help, you know, and I mean, when you're being pulled in a million directions, but I do think that if more people used it in a way to spread

• 25:15Speaker 01

  good and happiness and help people and and be more charitable. We would just be in a much better situation.

• 25:22Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, absolutely.

• 25:23Speaker 01

  Like worldwide.

• 25:24Lewis Howes?

  Absolutely.

• 25:24Speaker 01

  You know, and you can't, you can't make everyone think that way.

• 25:27Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 25:28Speaker 01

  And and that's okay. It's like not everyone is cut out to do certain things and that's okay.

• 25:32Lewis Howes?

  Mm hmm.

• 25:33Speaker 01

  Um, I understand now that like that is what I have to do and that is what I'm supposed to do and that is what I'm doing, which that fuels even when I'm having like the worst day or someone has written something very terrible or rude.

• 25:49Speaker 01

  That can pull me out of ever feeling like this is too much or, you know, any sort of negative space. And I'm able to basically just go, I mean,

• 25:59Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 26:00Speaker 01

  That's your opinion. I don't even know you, so it doesn't matter.

• 26:02Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 26:02Speaker 01

  And I'm gonna keep doing what I'm supposed to do because this million and forty thousand people need me.

• 26:08Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. And you've got a very specific body type.

• 26:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:11Lewis Howes?

  You're probably, not many women look like you and have your physique. You've got like, you're jacked, I feel intimidated being around you because you can lift more than me. And has that affected you in terms of your own personal view of yourself, your confidence in the past?

• 26:26Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 26:27Lewis Howes?

  Because you?

• 26:28Speaker 01

  I've been super built my whole life. And I was teased quite a bit, like, growing up.

• 26:33Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 26:34Speaker 01

  So,

• 26:37Speaker 01

  I mean, you'll understand this too, it's like, I think naturally, to protect ourselves as we like go through hardships, we just kind of build walls or ignore things or, or shut things out, or don't think about things, to protect ourselves from maybe the insecurities we have, or having to sort of be vulnerable and show them to people. And I think through things that I went through with bullying in school, or stuff that had changed the way that I maybe thought about myself, instead of, I really just ignored them for a long time, until certain events happened where I couldn't ignore them anymore. Because, like for instance, in 2015, I won my region, I took first in all of California.

• 27:22Speaker 01

  I had two rookie wins at the CrossFit Games in 2015, I finished 14th. I got a phone call from Warner Brothers, I ended up auditioning for a movie, ended up being for the Justice League, which also had me play a role in Wonder Woman as an Amazon. A lot happened that year. And it was amazing, it was so much good that was happening, and not because I was chasing that. But it was a natural progression because of who I am, and also, I just, I just focused on being the best athlete that I could. I had experiences on both those movies that had me like, I'm by myself in Europe, preparing for the 2016 season. Not only do I still have the same insecurities or the same thoughts that come up, but I had not yet really.

• 28:08Speaker 01

  Addressed them or practiced or learned or trained my mind in a way to be able to let them come and go. Without giving them too much attention, without letting them like be a reality.

• 28:22Lewis Howes?

  Hmm.

• 28:22Speaker 01

  Right, and.

• 28:23Lewis Howes?

  It consume you.

• 28:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, so like not only had I in real life, I had been able to train myself in a way where when those things came up, I could really just go. I didn't address them though, but I could ignore them and and the walls I had built up had honestly probably helped me get to a certain point in my career. And when I was over there. I still have the same insecurities and I'm in a whole different group of people and a whole new industry I'd never been a part of. And it was challenging.

• 28:53Lewis Howes?

  Huh, wow, so.

• 28:54Speaker 01

  It was challenging to in a community where I still stick out because of how I look. Not just my body, just like it, just the whole me. It was it's just more accepted. Right in my CrossFit community and health, health and fitness.

• 29:10Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, celebrated.

• 29:12Speaker 01

  It was celebrated and more understood.

• 29:15Lewis Howes?

  Hmm.

• 29:16Speaker 01

  And now all of a sudden I'm in a community where I was called because of that. But in a whole new world where some people don't agree or understand or celebrate.

• 29:33Speaker 01

  And sometimes for myself inside, I didn't celebrate it. And sometimes I loved it and sometimes I didn't. And now I was in a situation where I would have given anything to sort of fit in. Whereas I constantly tried to tell myself that I loved standing out and I did.

• 29:52Speaker 01

  Even though there's sometimes, you know, people can say things or insecurities that might pop up that I'd be like, oh, I wish this was a little bit different. Now I was in a situation where I was very different.

• 30:00Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 30:01Speaker 01

  And. I just wanted to have more positive talk coming from other people. And I didn't really have anyone to to like lean on. I was really by myself. I got through it and I dealt with it and I really was like, you know, I'm gonna, I get home and I go to competition. I go into the twenty sixteen regional and I'm like, you know what? I was dealing with some injuries physically. I had really bad tendonitis in my knee, so bad that we stopped me squatting altogether, like below parallel. Six weeks before regionals. And I'm like, you know, I'm gonna have the most, the toughest mental game, though. I'm gonna be so mentally tough.

• 30:40Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 30:41Speaker 01

  Went to regionals, fought like hell. Going into the final event, there were six of us in contention for the final spot for the games. I had to beat two of the girls, I beat one of them and the other girl I needed to beat won the last event. From what I understand, I was one point away from qualifying.

• 30:57Lewis Howes?

  Ooh.

• 30:58Speaker 01

  All the trolls just came rolling in on social media, holy cow. They weren't just attacking my appearance anymore, they were attacking like my character, my drive, my work ethic, like all these things that was really hard for me to handle and think about. And then also, I'd always had some thoughts, you know, or insecurities or questions about like myself internally. I never like told people. And so what happened is like when you don't tell people and it's just in your own head, you're thinking, oh yeah, it's probably not real. Like I'm thinking it's not real.

• 31:38Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 31:38Speaker 01

  But now all of a sudden I have all these people saying stuff and I'm thinking, oh my god.

• 31:45Speaker 01

  Like it is real. Like I didn't, I, I shouldn't have won the region in twenty fifteen. I, I, it's a fluke that I went to the CrossFit Games in twenty fifteen. Like how, why was I in a movie? Why would they want me to be in a movie? I don't look feminine. All of these things, like I'm not coming back, I'm washed up, like all these things that they were saying. And I still couldn't grasp the fact that like they don't know me. And that there's just people that I swear are getting paid to talk, to talk crap about. It just broke me down and it was at a point where like I was so anxious and I was so sad and I was so depressed for so long. And I knew that I didn't want to be that way anymore, but I didn't know how to like

• 32:30Speaker 01

  get through it. I started like trusting some of the people that I work with. And I started just like the thoughts I was thinking or or like in my in I'm a total introvert who's like really good at extroverting. And so I started talking out loud, like really just like saying things out loud. And a friend of mine is like, you know, you have imposter syndrome. He's like, you're dealing with imposter syndrome. So which made total sense.

• 32:57Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, like everyone's had that.

• 32:58Speaker 01

  Yeah. And when, yeah, that's the thing, too. It's like when you look it up, almost anyone who's having success will go through something like that.

• 33:07Lewis Howes?

  Sure.

• 33:07Speaker 01

  And it like really talked about like certain women between age this and age that and like that being something you deal with. And from there, honestly, was just at a place where like I had been so vulnerable. I had shown so much of myself through like they did a road to the games on me that year. And I was so stressed out and I was so upset. I had just prepared for the region. I was like no one else had. And I'm so connected with some of those guys with video, like with the cameras, like I don't. You got me. And like, I feel like that's how I am in general, but

• 33:44Speaker 01

  I had just had this opportunity to like. I just completely showed myself to the community, to anyone. I was at a place where I needed to. If I wanted to be better, if I wanted to be better than I ever could have been, I needed to work through this stuff. Like I needed to tear the walls down. I think to a certain point, the the walls I had built or the things I had, the lies I had told myself so I could like get through a day without thinking negative thoughts about myself, probably really helped me get to a certain point. But to become anything more or better or bigger than that, I had to deal with them. And that's kind of what happened.

• 34:21Lewis Howes?

  How'd you deal with them?

• 34:23Speaker 01

  Well, I read a book, one, talking to people that I really trusted. The thoughts that I have, instead of just keeping them inside because I'm embarrassed about them, saying them out loud to someone that I trusted so they could, one, when you tell them to a friend and they look at you, they're like. It is, you know how ridiculous that sounds, right? But then also too, sometimes you say them out loud to yourself and you're like, oh, that sounds way dumb. So a lot more of that. And then I read a book from Brene Brown, Daring Greatly.

• 34:48Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 34:48Speaker 01

  Literally promote that book to like everyone.

• 34:50Lewis Howes?

  She's amazing.

• 34:50Speaker 01

  Yeah. And that was probably the book that really helped me decide how I could start sort of mending things moving forward and realizing that we have like all of these moments that you can always just make a change. Like I'm feeling all these things and I've been affected by what people have said about me. And I knew that I wanted to feel better and change and, and move on and move forward and grow from the experience. But for some reason, it was almost like I was waiting for this moment where it was like, well, now you can.

• 35:29Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 35:30Speaker 01

  But in reality, it's like you have a million moments.

• 35:35Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. Every moment we get to decide.

• 35:37Speaker 01

  And you just get to make a choice.

• 35:39Lewis Howes?

  And that's the challenge. I've, I meet with a lot of people who don't believe in themselves or they don't think they're ready or they don't think they should be in the position they're at, or they have this imposter syndrome. And every moment, like you said, we have a, we have an opportunity to decide if we want to continue to tell ourselves negative things or say something positive that we do belong or we are good enough or we're here exactly where we need to be at the right time. And a lot of people I think struggle with accepting their greatness or accepting the success they're getting. And it always frustrates me why we struggle with that because we should be stepping into it more and more to inspire other people. And when we constantly say negative things to ourselves, it just holds us back and holds other people back.

• 36:22Lewis Howes?

  But like you said, when we start to talk about it with friends, that's when we realize how stupid or ridiculous it may be. And so sharing these things more with people and not just holding it in is what's going to help us move forward. So I'm glad you started doing that.

• 36:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, I mean, it really started to make a difference in, one, it's like in relationships, in, in my training. And it really was just me realizing that the only person that was holding me back was myself. And it really helped me realize that like, I don't have to give power, not only I do not have to give power to my negative thoughts, but I don't have to give power to strangers' thoughts. Like, people say dumb stuff all the time.

• 37:05Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 37:06Speaker 01

  And if you don't like the way I look, or you don't like the way I dress, it still doesn't affect the fact that I'm still gonna go and be successful. And I'm still gonna go and be the person that I'm supposed to be, even if you don't like me. If I go to a shop and I see a shirt, and I like the price, but I think it's really ugly, I'm not gonna buy it. That's okay.

• 37:27Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 37:28Speaker 01

  Someone else might come in and they'll buy it, and that's for them.

• 37:32Speaker 01

  It doesn't mean that, you know, I didn't value the fact that it was a shirt that you could wear and it would, you know.

• 37:37Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, but you don't need to go online and say, "This is an ugly shirt."

• 37:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, but also realizing that, like, someone might come and see me, and they might have an opinion, or an assumption, it's an assumption. Even if they say it, they say it, it might hurt my feelings. But no matter what they say, it doesn't change what my goal is. It doesn't change what I'm doing. So if it does change those things, it's because I'm allowing it to, because I'm now saying, I'm dwelling on what you had to say about me, when in reality, if I just go like this, and I just say, "Okay, thank you", and walk away.

• 38:15Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 38:16Speaker 01

  How many more moments do I have ahead of me than trying to relive all these crappy ones that are behind me?

• 38:21Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 38:21Speaker 01

  And I really just started thinking more along those lines, like legitimately, these people don't matter. And what they have to say is not gonna change what I'm doing tomorrow. If I have a job, and I've gotta go to work because I need to take care of my family, or I've gotta do the X, Y, Z, what people think about me will not keep me from doing my job. What it will do is keep me from being a happy person. Regardless, whether I listen to them or I don't, I'm gonna do my job because these things matter to me, and taking care of these people matter to me. Or I need to have money to eat food, I'm gonna do that. It's my choice if I want to be a happier person or an angry person.

• 39:02Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 39:03Speaker 01

  And once someone says something or makes a comment, they're a stranger, they're a stranger forever. So it's my decision if I'm going to, if I'm going to believe them. Or I'm gonna say, I'm happy with who I am. I'm not for everybody, and that's okay.

• 39:20Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. What advice do you give to people who focus on other people's words all the time? How do they move past that and not let it affect them?

• 39:28Speaker 01

  I think it's just, I, I recommend just, it's a practice. It's literally a practice and I've, one thing I've started to do, especially on like social media, or even if it's maybe I'm out in the streets and someone has something to say, I will smile.

• 39:45Speaker 01

  Like, and I've been working with, do you know who, uh, Justin Suai is? So Justin Suai is a, like a sports psychologist and he works a lot of MLB players and he's been working with me. And something like, he was really helping me prepare for the regional because I was already like weeks leading up, like an emotional, like a roller coaster, like I think that I hadn't quite yet felt things or let myself feel things that were a natural response to what I had been through. And I was starting to feel them, like I would be completely fine. And then all of a sudden I was like, I could, I could just like start crying, my body, I felt anxiety in my body, like not just in my, like my heart or my soul or my head, it was like physically in my legs, in my arms.

• 40:27Speaker 01

  And something he talked about was like every time if I have a worry or a stress, or maybe I have like a negative thought about my own performance or something come into my head, he's like, just like smile at it and like, and let it go. And I do that and I do it physically. I, I think about it. I, I remind myself that it doesn't, it really doesn't matter and we have thoughts all day. We have thoughts all the time. And one of the best things someone told me one day is he said, you know, think of it as like, like, okay, the birds, what they say? Birds that fly over your head, we have no control over them. But what we can control is if we let them build a nest in our hair.

• 41:13Speaker 01

  So it's like, we might have these thoughts, or people might say some things, but we can just let them go. And if we pay attention to them, or give them power, that's when it's just gonna start like stirring, and it's just gonna create problems. So I definitely am practicing it all the time. Practicing celebrating myself a little bit more. I'm not super great at receiving compliments, or talking about myself for the matter, and I think that's also stuff that I dealt with, like with the imposter syndrome type thing, like.

• 41:47Speaker 01

  I know that I'm doing a lot of really amazing things, and having great opportunity. And it's not because it's just like,

• 41:55Speaker 01

  because I'm a fluke and people are like, for a second, think I'm qualified. It's because I am doing things. It's because I am good at business. It's because I am good with people. It's because I do work hard for my goals. I do want to help people. I do love making people happy. I love building businesses and working with teams of people that wanna be successful and make changes and differences. That's all real. And so I'm getting a lot better at not only letting things go that will only cause grief, even though that grief won't make a difference in if I wake up and get out of bed tomorrow. I might, like that, and that's the thing too, it's like realizing, well, is that, is that gonna change what you do? Tomorrow, are you still gonna get up?

• 42:40Speaker 01

  You're still gonna get out of bed? You're still gonna go to work?

• 42:44Speaker 01

  So, realize that you haven't lost chances to be a better person. You haven't lost chances to love yourself. You haven't lost chances to like be successful, because we have all these moments where you literally can just, just do it. Just be the person that you wanna be. Just smile at the people that walked on the street, because you wanna be a happy person. You just get to do it. And I, I have this conversation a lot with people with diet. Because sometimes, we fall off the wagon, right? And we have like, we have these big goals. Wanting to lose weight or gain muscle, or whatever that is. And sometimes we have these moments of weakness. It's realizing that.

• 43:23Speaker 01

  It's okay. And you might have to tell yourself, it's okay, like a lot, okay? But it is okay. Let's say I wake up in the morning and I have a cinnamon roll instead of, you know, my eggs. My eggs and bacon. Cinnamon rolls are so good. But instead of like my usual, maybe I usually have like bacon, eggs, cup of coffee, and like a green smoothie or something. And I feel really good when I eat like that. Well, this morning I had a cinnamon roll. Maybe I'm still working on relationship with food. And I'm still working on a lot of these other insecurities that I have. So at that moment of weakness, I'm just beating myself up like, oh my God, I've ruined it. I've ruined it. Cause that's what starts to happen, like inside, it's like, it's over. I had like this great streak growing, you know, it's over, I've ruined it. But in reality, it's like, okay.

• 44:09Speaker 01

  Literally forgive yourself.

• 44:11Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 44:12Speaker 01

  And that was breakfast. So now all we have to do

• 44:17Speaker 01

  is focus on lunch.

• 44:18Lewis Howes?

  Make a better decision.

• 44:18Speaker 01

  If we can get to lunch and you can get to a decision where it's this or this, and you can say, you can make that better decision. You're golden. So just worry about that one, and then when that's over, then we focus on dinner. That's how I work with my training. That's how I do a lot of things. I don't try to look too far in advance. Cause I get overwhelmed really easily. If someone has a lot of weight to lose, if their goal is like lose a hundred pounds, I can only imagine, like even with me with some of my goals, like this recovery, it feels like it's so far away. And it takes so long for you to like start seeing a difference that like you're naturally are motivated to keep going, right? That it'd be super easy to give up or to wanna stop.

• 45:03Speaker 01

  But if you, and I tell people this, if you just focus on all those little moments along the way and ignore what your big goal is, time goes by so fast.

• 45:15Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 45:16Speaker 01

  Like a year goes by so unbelievably fast that it will be here before you know it. And I completely agree that sometimes if you focus on something that is so far away or does feel so out of reach, you can definitely get too discouraged like before you actually try to get there.

• 45:33Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. How do you train for a workout then to set yourself up to have the best workout you possibly can? What do you think about?

• 45:40Speaker 01

  Well, I first understand that like depending on what I've done the day before, or what part, like what moment in that training cycle I'm in, or how I physically feel, or what I'm going through mentally, or whatever, there's so many factors that are gonna weigh on you. So I accept that my hundred percent can look different on different days. And as long as I give my hundred percent, regardless of what my score is, regardless of what my time was, or regardless of what the weight was, if I give my true hundred

• 46:22Speaker 01

  percent, that is how I get better. Because if I'm physically there, I'm mentally there, I'm doing what I can, maybe I'm like haven't got a lot of sleep, maybe I've been traveling, or I'm sick. It's not a matter of always having to have the same numbers, or always having to have the same time. Your effort, it's just like if when me and you work out together, the weights, the time, the skills, might be different, will look different. But your effort, and how it makes you feel, is the exact same as how it's gonna make me feel. It might take me a little bit longer in a workout to reach a point where it's like, you can literally tell, like, this is when I get better. In the middle of a long run, everyone hits a moment, it's like, I wanna stop.

• 47:07Speaker 01

  If you can get yourself to not stop when you want to stop, that is when you're getting better. And that's what I tell myself in workouts, when it's just hurting so bad, I'm so tired, I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm so fatigued, I can't breathe, you know, I want to put this weight down. Every time I hit that point, I try to hang on a little longer. And in my head, it's like, that's where I'm making gains. And it's tough, because it takes a lot of effort to get to that point that you get to make a difference, but.

• 47:34Lewis Howes?

  And training your mind to push through every time is extremely challenging. I think Muhammad Ali said that he doesn't start counting until it starts to hurt. He doesn't start counting the reps. And it's challenging to break through constantly. Pain, pain. But that's why I always talk about doing something every single day that you are uncomfortable with or that is painful. That's why I think working out helps us train our minds to overcome all the challenges of life. Whether it's a thousand people leaving you nasty comments on social media or saying something about you or a business partnership not going the way you want it to, but having the mental agility to move through any challenge is what's key, in my, in my opinion, for us to be happy.

• 48:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 48:19Lewis Howes?

  If we don't have that mental agility, we're not going to stay happy or be able to, or be happy in a moment. We're going to let a moment consume us and build a nest on our head constantly. So that's great. How, how do you push through every time when it hurts? Is it just practice again? It's just thinking one at a time?

• 48:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, you know what? There are days that I don't.

• 48:36Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 48:37Speaker 01

  And then that's where it comes in, being able to practice that I can, you can be kind to yourself. Understanding that you're going to have good and bad days. Understanding that sometimes you're going to make a decision and it's going to be the wrong one.

• 48:49Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 48:50Speaker 01

  So also knowing that you need to be kind to yourself and know that those moments are going to happen and it's not the end of the world. Then the goal becomes tomorrow, I'm going to make the right decision.

• 49:04Lewis Howes?

  That's it. Focus on the next decision. Yeah, I love that. Uh, what's the, what's the vision for you moving forward now? You didn't make the games this year, but you've got a lot of businesses that you're running. You're doing movies, you're doing other stuff. What's the rest of this year or the next 12 months, vision for you?

• 49:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, um, just continuing my recovery.

• 49:22Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 49:22Speaker 01

  I'll be honest, like before this season, I was like thinking, you know, I don't know if I'll, if I'll compete again after this year because I love doing other stuff. I love the business and, and certain people even within that, my industry have like been telling me like, you don't have to compete anymore. But I want to, and it's not for other people. It's definitely for me. And it's still a huge part of me. And I think that like training will always be a big part of like me and who I am. I've been super active my whole life. Luckily with a lot of the businesses that I have going on, I don't do anything on my own. But I'm very strategic about who I do it with.

• 50:02Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 50:03Speaker 01

  And the people that I'm working with and all of the different things I've got going on, they hustle as hard as I do and want those things to be successful just as much as I do. So I know that I can, when I'm not there, they are still growing. You know, I'm going to get healthy. I'm gonna get my shoulders checked. I'm probably gonna start, I don't really wanna do surgery on my torn labrum. So I'm gonna look into some other stuff that I can do and now's the perfect time to do that. Kind of, like, I'm not upset that I didn't make the Games. And I think that's because I really had a big moment where I grew as a person, but as a competitor during regionals.

• 50:45Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm. Do you almost feel relief that you're not having to train as hard for the Games?

• 50:50Speaker 01

  It's not a relief. It's more so that I'm just okay with it. The relief probably is coming knowing that I still have a couple things that I couldn't address because I wanted to try and have a comeback year. And the other things just need more time. So now I just continue into training and we lower my volume for a little bit.

• 51:11Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, recover.

• 51:12Speaker 01

  And recover and, but it's not, it's, it's gonna be a much easier recovery than coming from a spinal fusion, you know, and I feel like was able to do, accomplish a lot this year. And it was a constant physical training and, and, um, battle and also mentally trying to learn to feel emotions and feel feelings without, you know, feeling like I can't feel those or I shouldn't feel them anymore or, you know, or they're dumb or I shouldn't show them to people. You know, or I shouldn't be upset. I should, I gotta be positive.

• 51:54Speaker 01

  You know, instead realizing that I don't have to be happy about where I placed.

• 52:01Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 52:01Speaker 01

  I don't have to be happy about how my first workouts went.

• 52:06Speaker 01

  But what I can do is decide like, what am I gonna do about it? If something's going bad.

• 52:13Speaker 01

  It's it's not making up some making up some lie thinking like that we can make it way better. Yeah. Or it's also not the opposite of like being so upset that I just like I'm paralyzed and I can't do anything about it. It's saying, well, I'm not happy about how event one, two, or three went. I came out of event three. First of all, I've never had more people cheer for me ever than I did at regionals this weekend. That's cool. And I was in heat one. I mean, what I have heard too is you just don't even hear that in the first heats. You have people that are really there for the last heat, for those last girls that are kind of in contention.

• 52:58Speaker 01

  It was insane. Wow, that's cool. And I was so bummed during event three. I just wasn't happy about my placing, but you would never know it because in the moment, all I could think about is keep trying. And I had never felt so much support. Like that was the first time, like for instance, on social media, you see your number of fans, right?

• 53:22Speaker 01

  I understand that I do affect a lot of people in a really great way. I understand that I have a power that is very powerful and I can do a lot of good with it. But until you actually hear it or see them or or meet them, it's still kind of like it's just social media, you know? You don't maybe quite understand like what position you're in. And so that was the first time that it was like, I hear you. And now I really, really know that you all have my back. And it was after that event, I still came off the floor. I was just bummed. I really was just ready for it to be over.

• 54:04Speaker 01

  My coach, one of my coaches came over and he's, his name is Michael Kazew. He owns Brute Strength and he's, uh, he said, what are you, what are you thinking right now? And I said, honestly, just. I just wanna be done.

• 54:15Lewis Howes?

  Mm hmm.

• 54:16Speaker 01

  Like, I was just so tired.

• 54:17Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 54:18Speaker 01

  And embarrassed. And embarrassed because it was like I was, again, it wasn't a lack of trying. It wasn't a lack of training. It was just a, it was a realization of where I am with those skills at this point in my recovery.

• 54:33Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 54:33Speaker 01

  And there wasn't something more I could do. I couldn't suck it up more. I couldn't try harder. Like, that's just was the reality. And it wasn't something I loved because I've been.

• 54:43Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, I know.

• 54:44Speaker 01

  An athlete. I've been at this level, right? And now it's like, I know what that feels like. And I want that. And it's not that I'm not trying to have that. It's just, this is just where I'm at and where my body's at. You know, we talked about how moving forward, there was three more events. And the three events that I would be really good at. How this could be a really big defining moment in going into next year. And me as an athlete, as a competitor, in business, in my relationships. And it was just how I chose to use this weekend. I went out for event four.

• 55:24Speaker 01

  And it was this great, very fast, painful workout, high intense workout, that I knew that I could do really well on. And before that, I almost felt like I didn't even, like, there was no real, no real point to like, to like, try per se and like, and to push myself to that really painful limit. Because it wasn't gonna pay off, right? In the numbers or in the ranking.

• 55:50Lewis Howes?

  Fine.

• 55:51Speaker 01

  And so what I was able to do and what I did is changing my mindset from, I don't care. I didn't care what I placed on those workouts. I didn't care if I was beating people, if I wasn't. I was going to make sure that.

• 56:08Speaker 01

  Physically, I was willing to do the best that I possibly could do. And when it hurt, I would tell myself it didn't. And when I wanted to stop, I wouldn't. Because I'm capable of it. I was, I, I am, I'm capable of, of doing so well on these. And so is everyone else, right? But it was like, I didn't care anymore about what my placing was. I didn't care. And, and I had to do that. It was like, it really was. It was that event, that next event of like, how I handled that? And how I chose to get through it was going to set me up for, because I saw that a whole nother day. And that's why I was like, I'm done, I'm tired. I'm tired of feeling. Like, I didn't want to like, feel anymore. And it really turned it around for me.

• 56:52Speaker 01

  I mean, I won my heat. Not only was it super emotional for me, my fans, my husband was like, people were like crying in the stands. I'm just moving on from regionals this year. I'm not bummed about how it went. I'm so grateful that I just, I had an opportunity to experience a regional in a way that I never had before. Which now allows me to relate to more people.

• 57:20Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 57:21Speaker 01

  Which means I can help more people because now I've lived all these different lives through competition. I've had the surgeries. I've got, I had to sit out. I went and worked my butt off, but I didn't qualify. I am recovering. I did not the best in three, three events. And somehow I was able, I, I worked through it and I kicked butt on the last three workouts. And I finished at the end, not in like a qualifying spot, but just a happy person. And I've been the person at regionals that finishes better than that, but is so unhappy and lets so many outsiders affect me. That at the end of it, I was miserable.

• 57:56Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 57:57Speaker 01

  And in the end, that was because I was not yet capable of, of letting that stuff go.

• 58:03Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 58:03Speaker 01

  Right? I was making myself miserable.

• 58:07Speaker 01

  No one else was making me be miserable in 2016. I was doing it. And I just hadn't, I just hadn't dealt with things or learned from things or created the tools in my toolkit to be able to move through that negative stuff or those ups and downs easier.

• 58:24Lewis Howes?

  Sure.

• 58:25Speaker 01

  And so all these moments are.

• 58:29Speaker 01

  They're just making me, you know, a stronger person who is way more capable of making a change or a positive change, which is like what I think fuels my fire more than anything else.

• 58:43Lewis Howes?

  That's great.

• 58:44Speaker 01

  And making my coaches proud. Like when I, I want that more than, than winning for myself. I want to go out and crush it. So when I come out, I, I've seen the look on my coaches faces when, when I've done that. I've seen it and like that is why, like that motivates me and that is what I crave is like seeing the look in their eyes, the, the, how they're, everything from like their body language to like what they have to say or, or the, the lack thereof because of how proud they are of what I was able to do. And that's a huge piece of them because that's, you know,

• 59:21Speaker 01

  I am a product of many people, but I am a product of them and a product of myself and.

• 59:28Lewis Howes?

  That's cool.

• 59:28Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 59:29Lewis Howes?

  What's the thing you're most proud of, of, uh, since your surgery?

• 59:32Speaker 01

  Well, I definitely think that how that just regional, how I conducted myself.

• 59:40Speaker 01

  Just my energy across the weekend. And then obviously I'm super proud that I qualified for regionals. I mean, I was terrified. You know, the regionals started in February and in December I still couldn't use my hands really.

• 59:51Lewis Howes?

  Crazy.

• 59:52Speaker 01

  So, and I was really nervous through the open. I mean, the open is like a lot of stuff that I'm, I've struggled with because of my, my surgery and, um, I qualified 16th and then I went on to regionals and I think I finished like 28th or something like that, which is great because up into event four, I was in like, I think I was in second to last place.

• 1:00:15Lewis Howes?

  There you go.

• 1:00:16Speaker 01

  I mean, with that said, my region, the west region, the girls are insanely fit, like all of them. You don't find that at all, a lot of regionals.

• 1:00:28Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, it's tough.

• 1:00:29Speaker 01

  It was very crazy, but also knowing, like being there and seeing it and, and realizing that like everyone is just working so hard made it even better for me to realize that I qualified. Not last to get into regionals, 16th.

• 1:00:49Speaker 01

  I was fit, I was meant to be there. And at this time, I wasn't meant to go to the games. And these girls deserved it.

• 1:00:56Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:00:57Speaker 01

  But, that's okay, and like, that's not the end-all, be-all. You know, so, the journey, I think I'm just so much more in love with being able to be a part of the journey because last year, not being able to be a part of it at all, It's tough. A part of something that like I work every day for, that's what was really difficult.

• 1:01:16Lewis Howes?

  Sitting out, yeah. Couple final questions for you. This is called the three truths. And imagine this is your last day many years from now on earth. And you've done everything you want to do. You've achieved every dream, you've had the relationships you want to have with people. And it's time for you to move on into whatever's next. And for whatever reason, you've got to take everything you've ever created with you. So you've done everything, but no one has access to it anymore. You've got to take it with you. But you have a piece of paper and a pen to write down the three things you know to be true about your life and your experiences. These would be your three lessons that you would share with the world. And this is all the world would have to remember you by. What would you say are your three truths?

• 1:01:57Speaker 01

  Oh my gosh. This is what they have to remember me by?

• 1:02:01Lewis Howes?

  So this would be your lessons to the world or the things you know to be true about life?

• 1:02:08Speaker 01

  Probably one is gonna be you have the power to make a change, literally at any moment, any day.

• 1:02:15Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:02:16Speaker 01

  You can choose to be happy or choose to be unhappy.

• 1:02:23Speaker 01

  It doesn't mean if you choose to be happy, it doesn't mean you're not gonna have unhappy things happen to you. But within your own mindset of being able to work through things or not let outsiders affect you, you know, and it's a constant practice. There is no end-all, be-all, like it's a constant, I'm constantly practicing these things. Your life will just be so much better and everyone around you will be so much happier. And then also, Surround yourself with the people that are or live or have the life or have the happiness that you also want.

• 1:03:00Lewis Howes?

  Mm hmm.

• 1:03:01Speaker 01

  And then just worry about what they think. Or, you know, look to them for opinions. That's one thing that I've learned too about people that say something that's pretty awful or just outsiders' opinions is, do they look at them? Do they have the life that you want? Do they have the job that you're working towards? Do they have the happiness that you want? If they don't, then ignore them because they're not even on the same plane as you. They're here and your trajectory is here.

• 1:03:36Lewis Howes?

  What's that?

• 1:03:37Speaker 01

  You know, be true to yourself and surround yourself with like-minded people that make you better.

• 1:03:44Lewis Howes?

  Those are great. Bob?

• 1:03:46Speaker 01

  Just a few paragraphs. Pick three things, bro. All right.

• 1:03:50Lewis Howes?

  Three paragraphs. Book.

• 1:03:52Speaker 01

  And a book.

• 1:03:53Lewis Howes?

  Exactly. Well, I'll acknowledge you for a moment, Brooke, because you've had an incredible impact on so many people's lives through your recovery. You're already a strong individual, but through you being vulnerable as well is what makes you even stronger and sharing your story, but also just showing up day by day through your recovery and not being perfect and not having it all put together the way you wanted to with your workouts and maybe your life in general. But saying, "I'm gonna show up and do the best that I can," it's really making an impact. So I acknowledge you and I know a lot of people are proud of you. So congrats and everything.

• 1:04:27Speaker 01

  Thanks.

• 1:04:28Lewis Howes?

  Where can we connect with you online? And anything that you're up to, how can we support? What's the website, social media?

• 1:04:35Speaker 01

  So, BrookeEntz.com. And there are two E's in the middle. People get that confused. There's an E at the end of my name and then my last name starts with an E is my website. I have my YouTube channel, which is just my first name. Also hashtag ItMakesEntz. Instagram, BrookeEntz, same thing. I've got a lot of different things I have going on. I work with a lot of really fantastic companies. Paleo Ethics is a protein sponsor of mine and we're actually getting ready to launch my own protein, which will be really delicious. And we just launched a skincare company called Athia Skin. So at Athia Skin, which is an anti-aging

• 1:05:13Speaker 01

  Great natural skincare line for, we're really pushing towards people with like an active lifestyle. People that are sweating. And then from there, I have the Naked Program, which is an ebook that we just launched, an eight-week ebook, for the ninety-nine percent of people out there that just wanna feel confident, be strong, and make gains. You know, it's, it's uh-

• 1:05:38Lewis Howes?

  Look good naked.

• 1:05:39Speaker 01

  And look, it is look good naked. You know, I understand that being competitive and everything is not for everyone, but there is some power in training and moving weight. I'm already getting so many messages of just women, like, cause of Facebook group, women that, you know, that are making comments of like, I just took my shirt off for the first time in a workout.

• 1:05:58Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 1:05:59Speaker 01

  Not because I'm happy about where I am currently, but I wanted, I was hot and I felt better and I feel more confident and I didn't care about the way I looked anymore. I cared about my performance and making sure that I did the best I could. Or people that have, you know, losing weight and it's amazing.

• 1:06:15Lewis Howes?

  That's cool.

• 1:06:16Speaker 01

  So, the Naked Program, it's an ebook, we're launching a program in a few, in a couple of months. And I think that is it, actually. Trifecta Nutrition, let me just spit it all out. I've got my hands in a lot of things. Trifecta Nutrition is in-

• 1:06:30Lewis Howes?

  Good movies.

• 1:06:31Speaker 01

  Is a food delivery service.

• 1:06:33Lewis Howes?

  Oh, nice.

• 1:06:33Speaker 01

  It is incredible.

• 1:06:34Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 1:06:35Speaker 01

  So, they do all of my diet, all my food. They're really great too about how if you have a month, if you have like a subscription or they, they send to you every week.

• 1:06:44Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:06:44Speaker 01

  But you're gonna be out of town, like, I travel a lot, so if I'm gonna be somewhere for training, I just give them my new address and they ship it to my new address so I can have my food where I'm going.

• 1:06:54Lewis Howes?

  That's great.

• 1:06:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:06:55Lewis Howes?

  Amazing. Are you doing movies as well?

• 1:06:57Speaker 01

  Um, movies, I don't have anything in the works. No, I am not in the new Wonder Woman movie. I think the Amazon portion in that's very small and I really feel like, I'm not against doing movies. I did musical theater until I was in college. I wanted to be on Broadway, that was my thing, before CrossFit.

• 1:07:15Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 1:07:15Speaker 01

  And I like learning and playing new sports, but-

• 1:07:21Speaker 01

  If something comes up, I am taking acting classes because I want to be prepared. And if something comes up, I definitely am not against looking at it or trying it or doing it. But I do feel like the value in me doing what I'm already doing is so much higher and I can help so many more people than if I'm just trying to be a small role in a movie.

• 1:07:44Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, of course. That's great.

• 1:07:46Speaker 01

  That doesn't mean that like, you know, I think that the small role, like the movies are bad. I just think that whatever I do, I want to make sure it makes me happy and my soul happy. But I really want to keep helping more and more people. And I, so Marvel or

• 1:08:04Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 1:08:06Speaker 01

  When you want to make that Lady Thor movie.

• 1:08:07Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, there you go. That'd be great.

• 1:08:09Speaker 01

  Right?

• 1:08:10Lewis Howes?

  Ah, yeah.

• 1:08:11Speaker 01

  That one or She-Ra, She-Ra and He-Man.

• 1:08:14Lewis Howes?

  That'd be great.

• 1:08:15Speaker 01

  Trying to ride a unicorn, you know?

• 1:08:16Lewis Howes?

  He'd be perfect. He'd be perfect. Final question for you. It's what's your definition of greatness?

• 1:08:23Speaker 01

  Oh my goodness. Some of these questions, like I feel like I need to like think about this for a while.

• 1:08:29Speaker 01

  I imagine you've gotten so many different definitions from people. And this is really just on the spot, but I will say, I feel like for me at this moment in my life and this time in my life, my definition of greatness is the ability to allow yourself to be yourself, the best version of yourself in that moment in time by

• 1:08:54Speaker 01

  being vulnerable and recognizing all of this, all the good things that you have going on. And by doing that, you get to, your trajectory is only gonna go up even more. And you're going to have the opportunity to make more people smile. You're gonna, more people are gonna want you to be the person in their, in their circle where they can surround themselves with people that have the happiness or the life or the motivation or the determination that motivates them to be that same type of person. And the only way to do that is by first allowing yourself to realize that you are that or that you're great.

• 1:09:37Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:09:38Lewis Howes?

  Thanks for coming on.

• 1:09:40Speaker 01

  Thanks for having me.

• 1:09:41Lewis Howes?

  Appreciate it.

• 1:09:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, thank you.

• 1:09:47Lewis Howes?

  There you have it, my friends. You are great, and you need to understand how great you can potentially be once you overcome these limiting beliefs and the conversations in your mind that say you're not good enough, that say you shouldn't be here. You should be here. You're here for a reason. Now it's time to step into it. Again, Billie Jean King said, "Champions keep playing until they get it right." Just because you're not where you want to be, doesn't mean you're not going to be a champion. You've got to keep playing the game of life. You've got to keep showing up, one decision at a time, one workout at a time, one meal at a time, one conversation at a time. Continue to make better decisions for your life, and watch your life unfold in a magical way.

• 1:10:30Lewis Howes?

  If you enjoyed this episode, go to the full show notes at lewishouse.com/649. Watch the full video interview. We've got it over there, all the other links. Again, one of the biggest things that holds us back in our life is doubting ourselves, as allowing the conversation in our mind to control our actions. You have an opportunity right now to make a different decision, to stop doubting yourself and start stepping into your greatness. I love you. I'm so proud of you for the work you're doing on yourself every single day. We're in this together, and you know what time it is. It's time to go out there and do something great.