506 Lilly Singh: Becoming Your Own Superhero Bawse

"There's very seldom right and wrong. There's more often different." - Lilly Singh If you enjoyed this episode, check out show notes, videos, and more at http://lewishowes.com/506 Get more from Lewis! Get my New York Times Bestselling book, Make Money Easy! Get The Greatness Mindset audiobook on SpotifyText Lewis AIYouTubeInstagramWebsiteTiktokFacebookX

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Lewis Howes?

  This is episode number 506 with number one New York Times bestselling author and YouTube sensation Lilly Singh. Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, a former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week, we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin. Pablo Picasso said, "Every child is an artist. The problem is staying an artist when you grow up."

• 0:43Lewis Howes?

  Pumped for our episode today with the one and only Lilly Singh, who is a Canadian YouTube personality, vlogger, comedian, writer, actress, and number one New York Times bestselling author. She is better known by her YouTube username "Superwoman." Since beginning her channel in 2010, her videos have received almost 2 billion views, and she reached 11 million YouTube subscribers in January of 2017. And her channel is currently in one of the top 100 most subscribed channels on YouTube. And just recently, she was ranked first on the 2017 Forbes Top 100 Influencer List in the Entertainment category.

• 1:23Lewis Howes?

  This girl is a boss in every sense of the word, and I'm super pumped to have her here in studio to talk about everything. Some of the things we cover are how Lilly overcame severe depression in college and what she did to overcome that, why being obsessed with excellence is actually a good thing, why it's okay to be the dumbest person on your team, what Dwayne Johnson, aka The Rock, told Lilly about sharing your money, why YouTube is the best platform for actors to be making content on, and so much more. I asked Lilly at the start, I said, "I want this to be the best interview you've ever done, and for you to share things that you've never shared before," which I knew would

• 2:07Lewis Howes?

  be challenging because she shares so much about her life. Life on her YouTube channel and at the end she actually said that she shared some new things and that it was one of the best she'd ever done. So I'm super pumped. I think you're gonna get a lot out of this. Before we dive in, I want to give a shout out to our review of the week. This is from Rego B who said, "I'm an immigrant. I came to this country with so many dreams and this podcast helps me every day to push harder to accomplish my dreams. Thank you, Lewis, for everything you do." So Rego B, thank you for being the review of the week. And if you guys want a shot of being the fan and review of the week, then just go to the podcast app or go to iTunes.com slash greatness and leave a review over on iTunes right now. Alright guys, a big

• 2:51Lewis Howes?

  thank you again to our sponsors and I am so pumped about this one. Lilly Singh, again blew me away, so inspiring, so captivating, and she took over this interview with just such passion, inspiration, and wisdom. You're gonna learn a ton, so make sure to share this out with your friends, LewisHowes.com/506. Tag me at Lewis Howes on Instagram and Twitter and social media. Make sure to tag Superwoman as well, Lilly Singh, to let her know what you thought while you're listening. So without further ado, let me introduce to you the one, the only, Superwoman, Lilly Singh. Welcome everyone back to the School of Greatness Podcast. Very excited about our guest today. Lilly Singh is in the house.

• 3:33Lilly Singh?

  I am in the house. Thank you for having me.

• 3:36Lewis Howes?

  I am pumped. We have a mutual friend, Humble, the poet.

• 3:39Lilly Singh?

  Shout out to Humble the poet.

• 3:40Lewis Howes?

  Told me, "I had to get you on. I started researching more about you. I'd heard about you before. I've seen photos of you in Lindsay Sterling and Cassie Howes."

• 3:48Lilly Singh?

  Love.

• 3:48Lewis Howes?

  And I, Justine, they're always posting about you. So I was like, "I gotta meet this girl."

• 3:52Lilly Singh?

  The sisterhood of YouTube, for sure.

• 3:54Lewis Howes?

  The unicorns.

• 3:55Lilly Singh?

  The unicorns. I know, they came to my premiere dressed as unicorns.

• 3:58Lewis Howes?

  I saw that. I was like, "That's pretty cool."

• 3:59Lilly Singh?

  That was the first time where I was like, "Do I have friends?" I think I might have friends.

• 4:03Lewis Howes?

  Those are like super friends.

• 4:04Lilly Singh?

  Yeah, exactly. Yeah, it was nice.

• 4:07Lewis Howes?

  And I thought I would start out, I said, I asked Humble, I said, what's the thing that Lily is known for for you that maybe most people don't know? And he said, she's got superhuman strength. Like literally super strong, she can lift things.

• 4:20Lilly Singh?

  See, when you said strength, I thought you meant like mentally strong and I was like, oh, that's so sweet. But the physically strong, I'm like even more flattered.

• 4:25Lewis Howes?

  So here's what he said. He said we need to do an arm wrestling contest.

• 4:29Lilly Singh?

  Oh, okay.

• 4:30Lewis Howes?

  And he said you'd be surprised.

• 4:31Lilly Singh?

  Well, you will probably win, but I think you'll be surprised again at how much, am I allowed to hold this?

• 4:36Lewis Howes?

  Hold whatever you want.

• 4:36Lilly Singh?

  Okay, cool.

• 4:36Lewis Howes?

  Yes. She's like bringing the grip around.

• 4:39Lilly Singh?

  Okay.

• 4:39Lewis Howes?

  She's got like.

• 4:40Lilly Singh?

  I'm stronger in my legs usually, but I'm already making excuses. So here we go. Ready?

• 4:43Lewis Howes?

  How do you?

• 4:44Lilly Singh?

  Yeah, I go.

• 4:45Lewis Howes?

  Oh, oh, she's pretty good.

• 4:47Lilly Singh?

  You're letting me lift. Okay, but you see there was a little resistance there, right?

• 4:50Lewis Howes?

  There was a little bit of strength, yeah.

• 4:52Lilly Singh?

  You know what? Growing up, I was so independent and I remember my family was moving. I refused to let anyone help me move things. So I was like, I'm gonna lift my TV and take it downstairs and I'm gonna move this dresser. And so I think I was so stubborn that really I just forced my body to keep up with my mental stubbornness.

• 5:07Lewis Howes?

  I like it. I like it. Maybe Humble's just a little weaker and so.

• 5:11Lilly Singh?

  To be fair, Humble is not the most physically strong person, I feel.

• 5:14Lewis Howes?

  He's an artist.

• 5:14Lilly Singh?

  Yeah.

• 5:15Lewis Howes?

  Right?

• 5:15Lilly Singh?

  He's strong in penmanship.

• 5:17Lewis Howes?

  He's great, yes, exactly.

• 5:19Lilly Singh?

  Yeah.

• 5:20Lewis Howes?

  I'm glad you're here. Super strong mentally and physically. You've got a book called How to Be a Bow. A guide to conquering life. Make sure you guys pick this up and it is very inspiring. You wrote it entirely yourself. A lot of great lessons of things you've learned from, from everything you've been through in your life, from personal to family to health, to relationships, to business. I think you just posted yesterday, you're the number one influencer in the world on Forbes. What did Forbes rank you as? Like number one?

• 5:48Lilly Singh?

  Well, they have a.

• 5:49Lewis Howes?

  Youtuber influencer or entertainment?

• 5:51Lilly Singh?

  Influencer list. And so in the entertainment category, I was number one.

• 5:54Lewis Howes?

  Entertainment, number one entertainment influencer in the world.

• 5:57Lilly Singh?

  Yes, actually, I'm not going to be

• 5:59Lewis Howes?

  Own it.

• 6:00Lilly Singh?

  But I'm going to own it. Yes, correct. I posted this yesterday saying how

• 6:03Lewis Howes?

  I saw that.

• 6:04Lilly Singh?

  Yeah, part of it.

• 6:05Lewis Howes?

  I didn't want to share this, but then men do.

• 6:07Lilly Singh?

  I'm trying to get better at that, not being, you know, wary of my accomplishments.

• 6:11Lewis Howes?

  Promoting your accomplishments.

• 6:12Lilly Singh?

  Yes, exactly.

• 6:13Lewis Howes?

  I think it's an art form. It's a dance on how we acknowledge it, right?

• 6:16Lilly Singh?

  And someone we both look up to that we have in common is Dwayne Johnson, who I learned from is it's okay to promote your accomplishments because he's such a great guy and he works so hard.

• 6:24Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, well, I've never met him yet, but his quote is on my wall.

• 6:27Lilly Singh?

  Yes.

• 6:27Lewis Howes?

  So I've been priming my space for him to sit right in this place.

• 6:30Lilly Singh?

  I'll put in a great word.

• 6:31Lewis Howes?

  Yes, for sure. But I think it's really cool that you're putting yourself out there and you're acknowledging it because I think if you don't acknowledge these certain things, not saying you have to share it out on social media, but if you're not doing it, then I think you're not acknowledging how great of a person you are and what you're up to in the world. So

• 6:46Lilly Singh?

  Thank you.

• 6:46Lewis Howes?

  Congratulations on that.

• 6:47Lilly Singh?

  Thank you very much. I appreciate that.

• 6:48Lewis Howes?

  Um, I'm curious, so many great lessons in the book, so many things you've accomplished. What's the greatest lesson you've ever learned?

• 6:57Lilly Singh?

  Oh, the greatest lesson I've ever learned. Um, I think something I struggled a lot in, a lot with in my life was, you know, when I decided to make YouTube videos, I came out of a very dark period in my life and that was at the end of university. And prior to that moment

• 7:11Lewis Howes?

  University in Canada is high school in the US? What age?

• 7:15Lilly Singh?

  It's college in the US.

• 7:16Lewis Howes?

  What age?

• 7:17Lilly Singh?

  So I was like

• 7:18Lewis Howes?

  Because it's very different.

• 7:19Lilly Singh?

  Early twenties or nineteen, nineteen, twenty, something like that. It's a college. That's college for

• 7:24Lewis Howes?

  Well, college and university is kind of the same thing here. It's like when you graduate high school, then you go to college or university.

• 7:30Lilly Singh?

  For us, it's either go to college or university as well, but university is four years as well.

• 7:33Lewis Howes?

  Got it.

• 7:34Lilly Singh?

  University. I was like, you're at university getting a psychology degree.

• 7:36Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 7:37Lilly Singh?

  And up until that point in my life, I don't know if it was just the culture I grew up in or the other family members I had that were walking a path. I really did genuinely believe that life was very linear. I thought you're going to go to university and then you're going to get a job, then you're going to get married, then you're going to have kids. With everyone around me, that's what they did. And I didn't see life as this fluid thing that you could create your own path with and do whatever you want. I was just like, this is the way life is. Um, and one of the reasons was because of school. I really Do believe in education, but in school you learn certain things. You learn subjects and then you learn. Science and then you learn a whole bunch of things and it's very by the book. Psychology, one of my biggest issues was I'd read this whole chapter about.

• 8:20Lilly Singh?

  A theory and the last sentence was, but this might not be true. And I was like, oh, okay. You're killing me here, Freud. You're killing me. I need, yeah. So one of the hardest lessons I've learned in my life is that. You don't actually learn a lot about yourself. And what will drive you as a human from school. Unfortunately, I don't feel that way. You know, when I was, you learn about time management, maybe. Writing skills, maybe. But when I went through depression in my last year of university, I was like, nothing I've learned in school has prepared me for this. Nothing I learned in school told me that I had to work hard at being happy. And no assignment I've ever done. Made me work at improving myself. And so one of the hardest lessons I've learned was.

• 8:59Lilly Singh?

  Everything takes work, not just your school assignments, not just your exams, not just the job you want or the job interview you want to ace. It's. Working on your mental health, working on your happiness, working on what is it I actually want to do and work for and what are my values and what are my beliefs? You need to work on those things. And I, it sounds silly to say, but that's not common sense. I feel when you're growing up. You literally think you're supposed to have those things. You're supposed to have happiness. You're supposed to have good values. No, how? Where do these things come from? You have to work on them. And that's what I've been doing. And that's what I preach about this.

• 9:30Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, and there's no class in school that taught us about how to have inner peace.

• 9:33Lilly Singh?

  Yes.

• 9:33Lewis Howes?

  Or how to love ourselves.

• 9:34Lilly Singh?

  Or if that even existed.

• 9:35Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 9:36Lilly Singh?

  Yeah.

• 9:36Lewis Howes?

  It was just like, this is what you do. And you know, I guess our parents are supposed to do that, but sometimes they don't do the best job or they're doing their best.

• 9:42Lilly Singh?

  Or sometimes maybe they don't even know, because they were never afforded those opportunities to ever learn about their inner peace.

• 9:48Lewis Howes?

  And if they're stressed out and depressed or they're going through challenges, then you're modeling what you see.

• 9:53Lilly Singh?

  A hundred percent.

• 9:54Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. So that's why I think it's really cool that you're talking about how to love yourself.

• 9:57Lilly Singh?

  Yes.

• 9:59Lilly Singh?

  Yes, thank you. I do believe it's a crucial step. And I think when I talk about it, I know people in their head, they're like, okay, what is this Tumblr, Tumblr quote time, we love yourself. But really, once I start to love myself, everything else kind of fell into place in my life.

• 10:10Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. Why do you think you were going down depression last year?

• 10:13Lilly Singh?

  There is, there is a few things. I think one was that, you know, when I was younger, I used to be really creative. I used to be the middle of the dance floor at family parties, always, I wanna bake a cool cake, I wanna do this dance performance, I wanna write a poem. And then I, the school system or my family, whatever convinced me that it's time to grow up. You now need to pick a job and pick a major. I remember going into university and them saying, pick a major now that you wanna do for four years, cuz that's gonna now dictate whatever job you get. Yeah, and I'm like, I have no idea what I wanna do. And so I was forced into this mindset of now's the time to figure it out. There's no more messing around and playing around and you can't do these creative things. And so I think that was one major reason, you know, I was doing something I didn't enjoy. I was going to lectures for three hours I hated and I wasn't interested in.

• 10:57Lilly Singh?

  Um, and I had a lot of trust issues with my friends as well, I'm not gonna lie. I ran into a lot of issues with my friends. Because growing up, I've always had major trust issues. I just, I, I don't know what it is, if it's just like the sexism naturally embedded into the culture I grew up in, but I had a hard time trusting guys. I had a hard time trusting my friends when it came to guys I knew as well. And so like, I had a lot of just unresolved issues in my brain. They all boiled into that last year of university. The pressure of exams and figure out your life and now you gotta do this. And I just was like, I'm done, I can't do this. And I kinda shut down.

• 11:32Lewis Howes?

  Wow, okay.

• 11:35Lewis Howes?

  Who was the person that you were in a relationship the most? That gave you the most pain?

• 11:43Lilly Singh?

  The person I was in a relationship with the most that gave me the most pain, I would say.

• 11:50Lilly Singh?

  You know what? I, I think, and this is gonna get real deep, I think it's there's an obvious answer, which is gonna be the friends I had a falling out with. But I don't think, I think that's kind of a scapegoat for the real issue. There is two. One is that my parents are the best people in, on the planet to me. But prior to me going through that really dark time period, we never really had an open relationship. Like, I wouldn't talk to them about a lot of things. They wouldn't really talk to me. And not because we didn't care, we just didn't know how to. You know, we didn't talk about a lot of things growing up. It was just, you're the parents, you provide for me and you care for me and love me. But if I have a problem at school, you're probably not the person I'm gonna talk to about it.

• 12:26Lewis Howes?

  Right, right.

• 12:27Lilly Singh?

  Um, and so I would say that, that lack of openness probably caused me a lot of pain.

• 12:32Lewis Howes?

  With your parents?

• 12:33Lilly Singh?

  Yes, but also the person that caused me the most, no, it was myself. The old me that didn't believe in myself and didn't think I deserved to be loved and just accepted crap in life. That version of myself caused me the most pain, to be honest. Um, that version does not exist anymore. I actually do care about myself as a person and value my happiness. Um, and the greatest thing that came from me overcoming that dark period was a big way I overcame it was talking to my mom. And so I always tell people, one of the greatest things that happened in my life was depression because my relationship with my parents now is amazing. And I'll never forget that day I went home and I just started crying. And for the first time ever, my mom was like, we're gonna talk. And I was like, what? I think actually what happened was, oh my god, you're already getting stuff out of me that I haven't talked about.

• 13:18Lilly Singh?

  I was in my car. I got home, I was in my car and I remember having just the worst day ever inside, not to anybody else, but inside the worst day ever. And I was parked on my driveway. And I just remember crying in my car. And then I didn't realize that my mom pulled up and she had seen, I guess. And so when I got inside, she's like, we're gonna talk. And the thing is, like, so many people had pulled up to my house and she was the only one that noticed. And so we had this conversation and I just spilled my heart out to her, telling her everything that was bothering me. And since then, we've just had such a great line of communication.

• 13:49Lewis Howes?

  How old were you then?

• 13:51Lilly Singh?

  Oh, I'm so bad with ages. This was at university, so twenty something. Yeah, exactly.

• 13:56Lewis Howes?

  Or this is the last year?

• 13:56Lilly Singh?

  The last year, sorry, the last year of university, yeah.

• 13:58Lewis Howes?

  Wow, okay, so you opened up, you became more vulnerable to her, is this what it sounds like?

• 14:03Lilly Singh?

  Yeah, and vice versa. She also, I mean, since that day, my mom has told me so many things about her life that really explain who she is as a person that I don't think she's told anyone.

• 14:13Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 14:14Lilly Singh?

  I really value our relationship. She really confides in me and tells me things like her deepest, darkest fears, and that's really special.

• 14:21Lewis Howes?

  It's powerful.

• 14:22Lilly Singh?

  Yeah, it's powerful stuff.

• 14:23Lewis Howes?

  It creates the ultimate bond, the ultimate connection, and the ultimate level of trust.

• 14:26Lilly Singh?

  A hundred percent.

• 14:26Lewis Howes?

  And level of just acceptance, right? When you start to reveal certain things other people may reveal to you, it's like you start to understand and accept.

• 14:34Lilly Singh?

  A hundred percent, because we can always try our best to put ourselves in other people's shoes, but that's at the end of just a figure of speech. To actually put yourself in someone else's shoes is to know their experiences and what they've gone through. And so, you know, to your point of our parents are sometimes doing the best they can. When I learned so many things about my mom that I've never known before, I thought, wow, she's actually going above and beyond to what she has experienced in life, which was she's gone through some things, man, and she did her best and I think I turned out all right.

• 15:02Lewis Howes?

  Exactly. Number one influencer in the world.

• 15:05Lilly Singh?

  You know, mom, not too shabby, hi, mom.

• 15:09Lewis Howes?

  What would you say, who was the most influential person for you, your mom or your dad?

• 15:14Lilly Singh?

  Hmm, I'm gonna have to go with my, it's kind of twofold, but my first answer would be my mom, just because I think I've spent more time with my mom and I'm a little bit, I think we have more in-depth conversations, me and my mom. Um, and she's gone through a lot of adversity as well, I think. I don't wanna come across as if my entire upbringing was completely sexist, no, that would be a lie, that would be me exaggerating. But, you know, the South Asian community, the one I grew up in, does have levels of sexism embedded into it. And so, when you contrast my mom and dad, my mom definitely had to face more adversity when it comes to what was expected of her and what she had to sacrifice and things she had to do. And so, I think especially being a woman in entertainment, I relate to that and I see that. And I know that I'm so outspoken because she taught me how to be that way.

• 15:59Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 15:59Lilly Singh?

  Yeah. When it comes to business, though, a lot of things I've learned about business is through my dad.

• 16:04Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 16:04Lilly Singh?

  My dad is a great businessman, he's great at speaking to people. Um, and I worked with our family business for a long time, and so I think.

• 16:11Lewis Howes?

  What's a family business?

• 16:12Lilly Singh?

  So he controls a territory of gas stations. In Toronto and I used to work as a cashier in one of them. So I used to kind of work for my dad for a little bit. And I used to see how he would assign certain goals to people and how he'd bring the team together. And I think a lot of those things I've learned and tried to implement in my own life as well.

• 16:29Lewis Howes?

  One of the things that our mutual friend Humboldt told me about, I was like, what's something that really inspires you about Lily? He goes, she, her level of work ethic and hustle, whether she's working fast food or some job she hates or putting together furniture is like the same level of energy and passion and hustle of across everything you do in life.

• 16:50Lilly Singh?

  Right.

• 16:50Lewis Howes?

  He said, he's really like inspired by that. Why, where does that come from and why do you do that?

• 16:55Lilly Singh?

  Yeah, honestly, I don't know where it comes. Part of me thinks that, and this is me being really honest. I think it's a great pro and a strength, but often at times it's also a really big con.

• 17:05Lewis Howes?

  Why?

• 17:05Lilly Singh?

  In my life. Um, I'll give you a prime example. The other day we threw a barbecue for one, someone on my team got engaged. He's sitting right over there and I threw a barbecue and I was like, all right, I'm pretty good, simple barbecue and get some stuff for the barbecue. And then barbecue, great. Then I'm like, I should do a fruit plate and I was FaceTiming Humboldt. And this is why I know he's at this because I was FaceTiming Humboldt and I was cutting strawberries into stars and bawling melons to make them look like flowers. And he was just looking at me and he's like, what are you doing? He's like, why are you putting this much effort into this fruit bowl? And it did not even occur to me. I was like, why wouldn't I spend five hours on this fruit bowl? What do you mean?

• 17:45Lewis Howes?

  Five hours.

• 17:46Lilly Singh?

  And I think it's just that I like to challenge myself and when I do anything, I, I treat it as if it is the most important thing. And that's great because then I get to do amazing things like this that I'm really, really proud of. But then also I spent five hours making a fruit bowl. So it's kind of problematic.

• 18:03Lewis Howes?

  Making your bed for two hours.

• 18:04Lilly Singh?

  Yeah, it's, it's, I haven't got that gotten there yet, but it's, yeah, I don't know. There's something in me that's just obsessed with improving and productivity all the time. And when people ask me, how do you do that? Don't you get tired? The answer is I don't know. I don't get tired. I, I get tired of doing a lot of things. I don't get tired of making this one thing the best it could be.

• 18:26Lewis Howes?

  You obsess over it.

• 18:27Lilly Singh?

  I obsess.

• 18:28Lewis Howes?

  Do you think there's something underneath it? Like, what if you didn't have the perfect fruit bowl?

• 18:33Lilly Singh?

  I mean, it wasn't perfect. The kiwis were kind of whack.

• 18:36Lewis Howes?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 18:38Lilly Singh?

  Um, I think it's just, we have X amount of energy in a day. And if I'm going to spend that energy anyways, why not just spend it on doing something really well? It really bothers me if I just do, like, here's an example. If I take a break, I usually watch a TV show. And in my brain, it's not just me, oh, I'm gonna do nothing and watch a TV show. In my brain, it is, no, no. You are going to get inspired, but you have to proactively watch this TV show now, so you can get inspired.

• 19:03Lewis Howes?

  It's not relaxing.

• 19:04Lilly Singh?

  And I'm obsessed with that. I'm obsessed with productivity at every level. And being the best I can be and extracting the best I can out of everything. And it's obsessive.

• 19:17Lewis Howes?

  Who do you want to be?

• 19:19Lilly Singh?

  Who do I want to be? I want to be...

• 19:25Lilly Singh?

  I don't want to fill anyone's void. You know, I think Humble and I learned this when we were in Italy at the honor of talking to Pharrell. And he said something that really, really impacted me when Humble was asking him. He said, Humble said something like, I want to fill the Andre 3000 void. You know, that's what I want my music to be. And Pharrell was like, you should fill the Humble the poet void.

• 19:42Lewis Howes?

  Ooh.

• 19:43Lilly Singh?

  And I was like, oh! I mean, Humble talk about that all the time. And that got me thinking where I don't want to fill the, I don't want people to be like, oh, yeah, you could be the next Mindy Kaling. You know, they're just saying that because I'm also a brown girl. I don't want people to be like, yeah, you could be. No, I want to fill the Lilly Singh void. I want to be the best version of myself. That gives me goosebumps. You know, I want to make little Lilly get goosebumps when she looks at my success. That's how I want to be.

• 20:10Lewis Howes?

  I love the dedication that you had. I'm just gonna read it.

• 20:13Lilly Singh?

  Yeah.

• 20:14Lewis Howes?

  Dedicated to the person I was six years ago. I told you to keep going. Thanks for listening. It kind of reminds me of the Matthew McConaughey speech.

• 20:21Lilly Singh?

  Oh, yeah?

• 20:22Lewis Howes?

  Did you remember seeing his speech? Was it the Oscar or the Oscar where he was like? My inspiration is myself three years from now and like chasing that guy who's going to achieve those things that I want to achieve. And it's like, what do I need to do now that's gonna make that happen and like always chasing that myself, not someone else.

• 20:40Lilly Singh?

  Right.

• 20:41Lewis Howes?

  So I think it's cool that you kind of dedicated to that.

• 20:42Lilly Singh?

  Yeah, that dedicate, I was thinking long and hard about the dedication. I'm like, of course, I want to dedicate to my mom. Of course, there's all these people. Put them all in the acknowledgements. I'm like, cut the BS. The person's actually dedicated to that actually got me here is the person that was like, I feel like crap, I'm still gonna get up tomorrow. That person.

• 21:01Lewis Howes?

  That inspires me. I just, I just finished my book, my, my next book and um, I might have to change my dedication.

• 21:09Lilly Singh?

  Really?

• 21:09Lewis Howes?

  And like, and give you the props for the inspiration. Not saying the same thing, but do it in my own way.

• 21:14Lilly Singh?

  You don't gotta give me any props for the inspiration.

• 21:16Lewis Howes?

  No, I like it though. I think it's really cool. Cause I dedicated my family in the last book and I'm like, okay.

• 21:20Lilly Singh?

  Which is great. Families are great.

• 21:21Lewis Howes?

  But they're in the acknowledgements as well, so maybe I'll change it up.

• 21:24Lilly Singh?

  But I think sometimes as humans, we need to be like, we feel pressured to always be giving people credit and always, and that's very, very important. But sometimes we don't give enough credit to ourselves.

• 21:34Lewis Howes?

  Absolutely. Yeah, I agree.

• 21:36Lilly Singh?

  At the end of the day, it's still you that did the thing.

• 21:38Lewis Howes?

  I love it. Now, now you went to school and you started becoming less creative. When did you decide that I need to kind of unleash my creativity again and bring this to the world and how can I make a living?

• 21:52Lilly Singh?

  Yes, I was doing it through a bunch of different things. In university, I did this thing where I started to bake cakes, like, you know, Cake Boss, Ace of Cakes type stuff. I know. And I was like, I'm gonna be a baker now and do cakes. And that was me trying to be creative, make them look like a purse or make them look like something.

• 22:04Lewis Howes?

  It had to be perfect.

• 22:05Lilly Singh?

  They had, that also rarely happened, but I tried my best. Um, and then it was, I had, I was part of a dance team. I thought, okay, this is my creative outlet. I'm part of a dance team. But the thing that always held me back in any of those endeavors was the fact that I always felt my success was dependent on other people. So the dance team is the greatest example of that. In truly fashion, I was like, we're not just a dance team. No, no. We're gonna take over the world through dancing. I want the biggest dance team. I want the best dance team. I want all genres of dance being performed. I want the best costumes. And when you have fifteen people on your team that are like. We really are just here to dance for fifteen minutes. We ain't trying to have a dance empire taking over the world.

• 22:46Lilly Singh?

  And that used to frustrate me so much because I would be showing up at practice, putting in my own money, staying up. Exactly.

• 22:52Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 22:53Lilly Singh?

  And one of the things I learned was that's not actually their fault. You know, people have different priorities and that's okay. It's my fault for trying to implement my priorities onto other people that simply did not have them. Um, when I was in my last year of university, I discovered YouTube, which did not exist when I was younger. And I remember watching these videos thinking, there's people in their rooms making videos and people are watching them. Like, what is happening here? And there was a few creators in my community that, you know, had a few videos and I didn't really think everything of it. I thought it was just them. Then when I went more into YouTube, I saw, no, people over the world are making these videos and this is a thing. And I spontaneously one day put up a video.

• 23:31Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 23:31Lilly Singh?

  Online. I thought nothing of it. It was not even comedy. It was so far from who I am today. It was actually spoken word piece about religion.

• 23:38Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, I heard you took it down, right?

• 23:39Lilly Singh?

  I took it down, not because it sucked, because I have many sucky videos up. I took it down because it just does not represent who I am anymore. But it was so awkward. I was so uncomfortable in it. And as bad as it was, I just fell in love with the fact that I could write whatever I wanted, say whatever I want, edit it however I want, promote it however I want, and no person around me impacted that success. There was no one else I had to rely on. I learned how to do everything myself and that I fell in love with. And so without thinking, I posted a second video that was comedy. It was based on a linguistics argument I had with my friend. And I posted another one, another one, and then suddenly I found myself thinking, well, how can I get better? How can I learn how to edit more? How can I write better?

• 24:21Lilly Singh?

  Just like the fruit bowl. Just like the fruit bowl. And then it snowballed into this brand and career.

• 24:27Lewis Howes?

  It's amazing. Yeah. And do you still edit all your videos?

• 24:30Lilly Singh?

  So as of recent, a few months ago, I do have an editor on board that helps me.

• 24:34Lewis Howes?

  Really? Just a few months ago?

• 24:35Lilly Singh?

  Yes. So for the past six or seven years, I know, which is six or seven years of me. Dressing up as different characters, moving my tripod, writing.

• 24:44Lewis Howes?

  It would take forever.

• 24:45Lilly Singh?

  Not only did it take forever, it got to a point where it wasn't enjoyable anymore. Because I played so many characters and I shot and I edited myself.

• 24:53Lewis Howes?

  And you wrote the scripts.

• 24:54Lilly Singh?

  Everything. And so I remember be, shooting these videos.

• 24:57Lewis Howes?

  That's exhausting.

• 24:58Lilly Singh?

  By myself, dressed in a beard, looking around like, what the hell am I doing with my life right now? Because I'm not having fun doing this and this should be a fun career. And that's why I decided to bring more people on my team. And now when I go on, on a shoot, I'm like, oh, I can do my job really well. And have fun, because having fun is important to continuing doing something. And not to mention, my editor is better than me. You know, one of the things I've learned is that it is okay to be the dumbest on your team with some, in respect to some things. Like, I'm really good at what I do, but I will not be as good of an editor as my editor. And so, we work very collaboratively, where I say, I want it to look like this, this is how I want. And he does that. And sometimes he adds his own flair, which is even better. But it's still me having the creative control, but someone executes it way better than I ever could.

• 25:42Lewis Howes?

  And allows you to go relax for.

• 25:45Lilly Singh?

  Or do more work. Or do more work. It allows me to do more work.

• 25:47Lewis Howes?

  Watch a movie and get inspired.

• 25:49Lilly Singh?

  Exactly.

• 25:51Lewis Howes?

  I love your, your quote about, you already know where this is gonna be in the part of your book. We tried to do this game, it didn't work. The quote about, the universe might respect the law of attraction, but it respects a good hustle even more.

• 26:04Lewis Howes?

  I really love that. Was there a point earlier when you weren't a hustler? Or was it even when you were five, you were like always hustling? And then, how do you sustain the hustle for people that feel like, man, that just seems exhausting?

• 26:15Lilly Singh?

  Is there a point in my life where I was not a hustler? Yeah, it was that point of my life at the end of university when I was super sad.

• 26:23Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 26:23Lilly Singh?

  That, if anyone had met me during that time, they would not recognize me as who I am today. I literally got up at, I mean, I still wake up at 3pm sometimes if I go to sleep really late. I'm just gonna be honest, my sleep schedule is a hot mess. But I had absolutely no goals. I woke up with no purpose. Literally Walker from The Walking Dead, did not care, didn't care to accomplish anything. I would don't, I didn't care at all about how the football looked.

• 26:44Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 26:45Lilly Singh?

  You know what I mean? I was a different person. Um, but prior to that, I do, I do gotta say, everything in my life, when I look back, has been this need to do my best. And the greatest example is I remember I used to work at Harvey's, which is a Canadian fast, I think your equivalent might be Hardee's.

• 27:00Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 27:00Lilly Singh?

  Here in America. Um, I worked at, it was my first job, a fast food restaurant. And I remember there was downtime and the store was empty. And so I was like, okay, great. I'm gonna refill the cutlery. And I was doing stuff and it did not occur to me that everyone else was just chilling. They were just like looking at me.

• 27:18Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 27:19Lilly Singh?

  Fill these forks. And I remember hearing someone say this, and it was the most shocking thing I've ever heard. They were just like, you are just always gotta do something. Like you're always working. And I'm like, wait, are you guys not? And it was so shocking, but I didn't even realize that was a thing people did. Like they just did not do something. And so I really think it's just something embedded within me that I haven't completely figured out why. It's just always been this need to do things and be productive. Um.

• 27:45Lewis Howes?

  Well, I mean, you look at the results. I mean, the results, results don't lie. You've generated certain results.

• 27:50Lilly Singh?

  Nor do hips.

• 27:51Lewis Howes?

  They do not.

• 27:52Lilly Singh?

  You're right.

• 27:52Lewis Howes?

  Do your hips lie?

• 27:53Lilly Singh?

  Not at all.

• 27:54Lewis Howes?

  Oh, all right.

• 27:54Lilly Singh?

  Never.

• 27:55Lewis Howes?

  Show me later.

• 27:55Lilly Singh?

  Okay.

• 27:57Lewis Howes?

  Do the dance move. Um, I mean, my results don't lie. And you've created specific results in your life because of this level of hustle and energy that's been consistent. And I think if people don't wanna generate great results, then they can take a break and they can pause and, you know, not be productive in certain things consistently, and they're gonna get those type of results. So it all depends on what we want.

• 28:17Lilly Singh?

  Uh, it all depends on what we want. And I think the danger of, not the danger, but something I know people think after hearing this conversation is they think, well, that's very unhealthy. That's an unhealthy lifestyle balance. And people say that to me all the time. A lot of my friends are, you're always working, just come out with us. And here's the thing. If I'm really honest, to have a certain level of success, I do believe you do have to be obsessed with it.

• 28:41Lewis Howes?

  You have to be.

• 28:41Lilly Singh?

  You know, you have to be obsessed with it.

• 28:43Lewis Howes?

  Win a championship in any sport at the highest level without being obsessed.

• 28:46Lilly Singh?

  So it depends what your goals are.

• 28:48Lewis Howes?

  Depends what it is.

• 28:48Lilly Singh?

  If your goal is to be successful, but then also have weekends and also have a certain standard of relationship and have family, that's not wrong. That is your goal and you do that. But when people say that to me, my goals are I want to be exceptionally good at this one thing.

• 29:05Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 29:05Lilly Singh?

  And that is going to require a certain level of dedication. And that is the reality of the situation.

• 29:10Lewis Howes?

  Obsessiveness.

• 29:11Lilly Singh?

  Obsessiveness.

• 29:12Lewis Howes?

  All of your time.

• 29:12Lilly Singh?

  And Dwayne's a great example, like obsessive is waking up at four, working out, no matter where he is, like that is an obsessive level of commitment.

• 29:20Lewis Howes?

  And he gets incredible results.

• 29:22Lilly Singh?

  Exactly.

• 29:23Lewis Howes?

  But he wouldn't get those results without obsessiveness.

• 29:25Lilly Singh?

  Exactly.

• 29:25Lewis Howes?

  Without constantly creating and focusing on his health and building relationships and adding value to the world and being nice to people. He seems like one of the nicest guys, right?

• 29:35Lilly Singh?

  The nicest person I've ever met.

• 29:36Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 29:37Lilly Singh?

  And I know people are just like, oh, he's just nice to you, maybe. No, I can write a whole scientifically proven book as to why he's the nicest person on the planet.

• 29:44Lewis Howes?

  Why is he?

• 29:45Lilly Singh?

  Okay, he's the nicest person for a few reasons. One is that he is actually, you know, when you talk about power, there's many ways you could exercise power. You know, you could do dictatorship, like I control you, thus I am powerful and I can make you do whatever I want, make all these rules. And we see these types of people in the world and they, regardless of what we like or not, they have power. Another way to have power is to think, true power is how many people can I help accomplish what they want to do in life? That is a different way of looking at power. That's how he looks at power. And he does that through when he's a part of a movie or when he's talking to me or when he's talking to any of his friends, he does not say you, he says we. That's his thing. When, the first time I ever had a heart-tart conversation with him, I remember telling him this whole situation about, you know,

• 30:27Lilly Singh?

  I call myself Superwoman, I have a deal with DC, and I told him this whole thing about how, obviously, seven years ago, I didn't think my YouTube channel would be so popular, so I stupidly call myself Superwoman, not realizing it's trademarked. Um, and I remember, I'll never forget his response, which was, I definitely think we should try branding more towards Lilly Singh and I think we should do. And then he caught even caught himself and he said, keeps saying we, obviously it's you, but it's just, you know, we. And he was just so invested. And if you look at his movies, he's not the producer of all them. He's not the director of all them. But he always in his captions like, we've done what we can to put on the best movie for you. Cause he understands that is the more positive way of using power.

• 31:03Lewis Howes?

  Of course. Yeah, yeah. If it's all you, it's a lot of pressure. It's very selfish, I think.

• 31:07Lilly Singh?

  Exactly.

• 31:08Lewis Howes?

  I try to make it about a group of people. And I know that there's no way, even I saw Arnold Schwarzenegger doing a speech about this, uh, for a commencement speech. Whether you like him or not, or agree with him or not.

• 31:21Lewis Howes?

  He was like, there's no such thing as a self-made man. He's like, there are thousands of people that helped me to get to where I'm at. Uh, and it doesn't matter what I've accomplished. There's so many people on the team who've supported it. So we've got to think about the team, the people you surround yourself with and who support you.

• 31:35Lilly Singh?

  Yeah. Dwayne is all about that. That's probably the greatest lesson I've learned. To be honest, I was bad at that. I will call myself up fully.

• 31:41Lewis Howes?

  You wanted to do it all yourself and have control.

• 31:43Lilly Singh?

  Yes. And I was not good at delegating. And also I did have this internal battle when I moved to LA where I was like, wait, so many people need a cut of the money I make. That was a huge issue.

• 31:53Lewis Howes?

  I'm experiencing this right now. It's like 10% here, 5% for lawyers, 10% for business manager.

• 31:58Lilly Singh?

  I was like, a hundred percent of me is in front of the camera. Wow, y'all getting 10% of everything that happens.

• 32:03Lewis Howes?

  I know, right?

• 32:04Lilly Singh?

  And that was a struggle I had. And I remember sending Dwayne this email, asking for his advice. And he said something that really changed my mind. He said, listen, everyone brings their expertise to the table. And therefore everyone deserves a cut. And that's how you will get greater results. And I blindly trusted him because I was like, if Dwayne says it, it must be true.

• 32:24Lewis Howes?

  It's so true. I was resistant to certain things, you know? This whole year I've been getting more and more people kind of courting with, with the results that we're getting and the brand that we're building. And I'm like, I've always done the business deals myself and negotiated every contract and speaking fees and partnerships and sponsorships. I was like, I've been negotiating since I was getting a hundred dollars a sponsor to where I'm at now. And it's like, I don't need someone else to do that for me. I'm good at this, you know? But the more I'm realizing, like, and the more people I talk to who have bigger brands are like, you just need the team. You need a team. If you want to elevate it to a whole other level, you gotta remove yourself from some things.

• 32:58Lilly Singh?

  Right, exactly. Because it goes back to, you're really good at it, but. Are you as good as the person who that's their sole job?

• 33:03Lewis Howes?

  It's like you're out of there too.

• 33:04Lilly Singh?

  Exactly.

• 33:04Lewis Howes?

  You're pretty good at it.

• 33:05Lilly Singh?

  Exactly.

• 33:06Lewis Howes?

  But he's a little better and it gives you time to do other things, right?

• 33:08Lilly Singh?

  Exactly. That's the s- the smartest decision you can make is understanding you're not the smartest at something. And get someone who's smart to do that thing.

• 33:16Lewis Howes?

  But you're pretty smart at a lot of things.

• 33:17Lilly Singh?

  I, I'm, I'm pretty decent at editing, but could I do the thing that editor does? Absolutely not.

• 33:22Lewis Howes?

  Right. What do you think, um, you need to let go of in your life in order to get to the next level for yourself? You're already number one influencer in the world. You're already one of the top three highest paid YouTubers of all time. You're already-

• 33:36Lilly Singh?

  Since the beginning of time.

• 33:38Lewis Howes?

  You're already-

• 33:38Lilly Singh?

  In a world.

• 33:40Lewis Howes?

  You're already a number one New York Times bestselling author. You're already doing music and tours and dancing and taking over the world. What do you need to let go of and who do you need to step into in order to get to your next level?

• 33:54Lilly Singh?

  Something, and this is quite specific to what I do, um, something I need to let go of that I think a lot of people would be shocked to, to know it actually does impact me is I don't necessarily make content completely for views. You know, and I think my vlog channel, channel is a great testament to that. My vlogs don't get a lot of views and I've always told myself that's because-

• 34:16Lewis Howes?

  What's not a lot?

• 34:17Lilly Singh?

  Okay, so yes, let me put this, let me put this into perspective. So my main channel in a, a, half a day should get a million views, a video. My vlog channel, a good vlog in 24 hours will get 150K. So it's significantly less. It's a second channel. It's not scripted. It's me going through my day, being myself. If people want to watch it, great. And I have a rule for myself that I refuse to orchestrate drama into my day for my vlogs. I just am not going down that path.

• 34:41Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 34:41Lilly Singh?

  And so something I need to let go of is that even though I make content I really believe in and I think is funny and you can ask my team, I'll sometimes be reading my video, my scripts and watch my videos and I'll be laughing at my own jokes. And they're like, you're such a nerd. And I'm like, but I'm so funny. And no one else is laughing. That's fine. But the, the challenge is that- I have kind of been this very fast growing channel and done really well for myself. There are going to be people that surpass me in terms of views. There are going to be videos that don't do as well. And even though I know in my heart when I'm writing a script, I'm not thinking about, okay, this will get two million views. The struggle is that when you post things online, that's the only measure we have. Right? I don't have a live audience.

• 35:26Lewis Howes?

  Results.

• 35:27Lilly Singh?

  Exactly. I care less about that when it's live. Of course, I still want the place to be sold out, but when it's not sold out and there's still 200 people that are screaming, that still feels like, oh, a message is getting across. The problem with online is the views are the only measure we have.

• 35:41Lewis Howes?

  Comments, views, likes.

• 35:42Lilly Singh?

  But I can't even read through every comment. You know what I mean? So there's no way, if there was a sea of positive comments that would make me feel like this video had a great message, I wouldn't be able to get through them all. The quickest number I can see is the view count. And so what I need to let go of is that view count actually validating what my content is. Because I don't want to be the person that makes content just for views. I want to be the person that makes content that gets people like Dwayne to be like, that's, I want to work with you. That's the content I want to make. I want to make content where Stephanie McMahon, when I was obsessed with W D, she's like, yes, I'll do a collab with you. And Little Lily's like, yes, I'm glad you made this video. That's what I want to drive me, but it's been such a challenge because there's no analytic for that. There's only an analytic for the views. And so I need to really let go of that somehow.

• 36:25Lewis Howes?

  And it's like a long-term game. It's like I'm creating content that maybe in a few years, someone will see and inspired and they want to partner with me or we want to do a project together that I'm, that's actually more important than 10 million views on any video.

• 36:36Lilly Singh?

  Yeah, and I, and I do really believe, I genuinely believe this when I say it. It's just hard to implement every day again because there's no statistic. But the greatest thing that could ever come for me doing what I do is that years from now, there was someone that accomplished great things, like someone who freed people, who got equal rights, someone who even became like some sort of world leader. And if ever in an interview they were like, you know, I used to watch this girl Lily and she really inspired me. That is like really true, I think, inspiration and power and what I would want to accomplish. Because it's not only about my success, it's about everyone who might be inspired by that. But there's no statistic for that, so it's hard.

• 37:14Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, it's tough. Who's the most inspirational person in the world for you right now?

• 37:23Lilly Singh?

  Huh, the most inspiration person in the world for me, right now,

• 37:28Lilly Singh?

  with fear of sounding redundant, it's going to be Dwayne. Yeah, it's going to be, of course, my mom is there. Of course, there's many other people in my family that inspire me, but the particular, the particular way Dwayne has inspired me, I think is so unique, I think it's like a one in a billion story of the summary would be, growing up, obsessed with Dwayne. Like, his pictures were all over my wall. My email address was [email protected]. In school, I vividly remember winning a contest and on the announcements to the school, it said, Lily the Rock sing. Like, everyone knew I was obsessed with the rock, okay? And so, my whole entire life was just loving this guy. I started making YouTube videos. I grew up and I'm still a huge fan, but maybe a less fanatic fangirl.

• 38:11Lilly Singh?

  Um, and I used to make a lot of comments about him in my videos, you know? Talk a lot about him, make jokes about him, and not knowing his daughter was watching my videos. And so, through whatever fate and stars aligning, Dwayne has become my mentor and friend. And that's a rarity in life. Few people can say, my absolute role model is someone I can call and ask for advice from.

• 38:30Lewis Howes?

  Crazy.

• 38:31Lilly Singh?

  Few people can say that. And few people, a lot of people would say that's scary because a lot of times when you meet people, they're not who you expect them to be.

• 38:39Lewis Howes?

  But he was.

• 38:39Lilly Singh?

  Dwayne is so above and beyond who I ever expected him to be. And what that has taught me is that everything you learn about, before I even got an ounce of fame, I was so guilty of being one of those people that's like, celebrities are stuck up, they're rich, they don't got problems. All these basic mentality things people say on Twitter to me, you know? I used to think that. I used to think, there's no way a celebrity actually cares about people. Dwayne proved me so damn wrong. And I remember just having a heart to heart with him saying, you have actually convinced me that you can be so successful in such a cutthroat industry, but still be the nicest person. And I did not think that combination was possible at all. I did not think. I thought it was all facade, but it is not.

• 39:24Lilly Singh?

  You do not have to be a jerk to be good at business. You do not have to be rude to get your point across. And Dwayne proves that. And that's why I value, as I mentioned in the book, being nice so much. Because I do think it is an ingredient in the recipe to success.

• 39:37Lewis Howes?

  Wow. What's the biggest lesson he's taught you then?

• 39:40Lilly Singh?

  The biggest lesson he's taught me, I mean amongst many, business-wise, something he said to me that's always stuck with me is he, he said to me, you know, when I was in football, and I tried to go to wrestling, everyone was like, okay, now you're gonna be a wrestler. And he got really, really great at wrestling. And when he left the WWE, he went into acting. And again, people said to him, now you're gonna be a wrestler, go into acting. We've seen this attempted before. It didn't work out too well. And then he got into movies. And after movies, he decided to do Ballers, which is a show.

• 40:12Lewis Howes?

  I love that show.

• 40:13Lilly Singh?

  People said to him, he told me, people said to him, movie stars don't do TV shows. That is not the, the path people go on.

• 40:20Lewis Howes?

  It's like going backwards or something, right?

• 40:21Lilly Singh?

  Exactly. And he was like, well, we're gonna buck tradition then. He's like, you make up your own rules about what that path is going to be. And that was always really inspirational to me as someone who went from psychology to I'm gonna make YouTube videos, to actually I wanna act and sometimes wanna do music and I wanna write a book and I don't wanna live with myself because of no one else is taking that path. I'll make that path then. And that's what he's done.

• 40:42Lewis Howes?

  Amazing, amazing.

• 40:44Lilly Singh?

  This is just basically episode one of Lily fangirling about Dwayne The Rock Johnson here of a 12-part series that could happen.

• 40:53Lewis Howes?

  What is your vision next for you then? What's the scariest thing that you wanna go after for yourself? If you could achieve anything?

• 41:01Lilly Singh?

  If I could achieve anything, I-

• 41:04Lewis Howes?

  Like you're gonna, if you could write it down and it's going to happen, anything you want, what would that be?

• 41:12Lilly Singh?

  I want to be,

• 41:17Lilly Singh?

  I'm just gonna be blunt with that. I want to be a very big star. I'm gonna say that and I know-

• 41:21Lewis Howes?

  Bring it, girl.

• 41:21Lilly Singh?

  Yeah. And I know sometimes people think that's what you wanna be. I wanna be a big star because you know, one of the greatest things about what I do is that I can actually do things for people, you know? I can make a video that can inspire someone, even through money. I can help my friends if they need help. If I need to help with a project, I can do that. If I need to promote something, a cause I really believe, I can do that. I wanna be a big star, not just because I wanna be in movies and I believe in the art of acting and I wanna tell great stories, but I think with the more stardom I have, I believe in my heart, I could help more people. You know, I wanna be that person that's like-

• 42:02Lilly Singh?

  I'm gonna walk a red carpet and then tomorrow I'm gonna go and with an organization I'm working with, we're gonna go to this this village in Kenya I admire and I'm gonna build schools without giving it a second thought because I can do that. That's what I wanna do. I want, I don't wanna just lie and say, I just wanna help people. Of course I do, but I also wanna do it because I am a great actress or a great musician. I'm really great at something and that greatness has led to me being able to help people. That's what I want. I don't just wanna help people through an inheritance or anything, not that anything's wrong with that, but I wanna feel like I'm really good at something and because of that I'm able to help people.

• 42:35Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 42:36Lilly Singh?

  So it's kind of a selfish motive, but one I wanna share with other people.

• 42:39Lewis Howes?

  Sure. What's your biggest fear if that happens? Are you afraid of it all?

• 42:43Lilly Singh?

  Oh, I'm so afraid. Half of my life is being afraid, to be honest.

• 42:46Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 42:46Lilly Singh?

  Yeah, I think I'm, every day I step out of my comfort zone. And there are some days where I'm like, shut up Lily, just have a day where you just sit on your couch.

• 42:55Lewis Howes?

  You're safe.

• 42:56Lilly Singh?

  And you're safe and you're not doing a speech and you're not in front of a camera and you just get to be crappy. Let yourself be crappy. And I think every day, whether it's podcasts or whether it's auditions or whether it's panels or whatnot, it's always some element of stepping out of my comfort zone, preparing for something, getting mentally ready for something. And I'm scared that that's going to take a toll. Cause even now, I don't consider myself, I mean Forbes can say whatever they want, I don't consider myself this huge massively massively influential person. I think I influence a certain amount of people and that's great, but um I'm scared that it is, my career is gonna go upwards

• 43:37Lilly Singh?

  and I'm going to not be able to feel the same way as I feel right now speaking to you. That it's gonna take such a toll on me that I'm gonna think.

• 43:45Lewis Howes?

  Really?

• 43:46Lilly Singh?

  Yeah, it is a valid fear and I know reality enough to say that. I'm not, I'm no longer that naive person that's like, I'm gonna respond to every message I get and every bit of fan mail and I'm never gonna say no to a picture and I'm always gonna be a positive, happy person. That's not possible. It's not possible. And I know that now, sitting here today as Lily, but I'm five years from now. What else will I learn?

• 44:08Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 44:09Lilly Singh?

  That is impossible.

• 44:10Lewis Howes?

  I'm sure you've seen The Rock too. I'm sure he would love to take a photo with everyone.

• 44:12Lilly Singh?

  Exactly.

• 44:13Lewis Howes?

  But when there's twenty thousand people outside his hotel room.

• 44:14Lilly Singh?

  When there's twenty thousand people also when.

• 44:16Lewis Howes?

  It's like, I gotta get to work.

• 44:16Lilly Singh?

  And exactly. And where do you draw that line? And so I've just learned so many things that three years ago I didn't know. And so the fear is that three years from now, what will I know that I don't know now? That will change whatever I'm saying right now.

• 44:26Lewis Howes?

  What are you more afraid of? Being the most relevant person in the world or being irrelevant?

• 44:33Lilly Singh?

  Hmm. I'm gonna say it currently, Lily. Her answer, the fear would be being irrelevant. And I say that because I'm in this really interesting gray area where I have a lot of fame online. But I still go into auditions and they're like, I'm sorry, what was your name again? You know what I mean?

• 44:52Lewis Howes?

  And you're like, uh-oh.

• 44:52Lilly Singh?

  I'm caught in between two worlds.

• 44:53Lewis Howes?

  You go check.

• 44:54Lilly Singh?

  Yeah. So I have celebrity. But then sometimes I'll go to events and people will not care at all about who I am. And it's like this area of like, I have really sometimes I'll have dinner with my celebrity friends and I'll have a conversation. And then I know I can't have that same conversation with some of my friends, not because they're better or worse, but because like you won't relate to anything. I don't wanna be that douchebag that's having a dinner with my friends being like, oh my god, so. The thing I hate about first class is you know, I don't wanna have that conversation. I'm like, oh my god, so like I went outside and there was like hundreds of fans and then cuz I don't want that, my friend to be like, can we even have a conversation about? But who's to blame there? Because that is my reality. You know, that I'm not trying to put on a facade. That's the real things I experience.

• 45:39Lilly Singh?

  And that always gets to me cuz I'm like, I never wanna be so up here that I can't come down here and have a conversation with anyone. I wanna be able to have a conversation with anyone. So I wanna maintain that. And there's a fear of me making a video of my fans being like, I can't relate to this. What you're telling me is so irrelevant to me.

• 45:55Lewis Howes?

  Yeah. What do you think about the most during your days?

• 46:01Lilly Singh?

  You wanna know a thought I have every single day? It's so ridiculous. At least once a day, I have a thought which is, if I had a superpower, it would be to pause time so I could take a nap. Once a day, I have this thought. I just would love to pause time, take a nap right here on this desk, and then just resume, and you wouldn't even know. You know what I mean? I think about that a lot. I also think about during my day, I'm obsessed with productivity, like I said. So, I have a chapter in my book that is about problem solving everything, from small problems to very large problems. So, something like, oh, what am I stressed about right now? My phone is dead. Great, I'm gonna come up with three solutions as to how this cannot stress me tomorrow. And so throughout my day, I'm always picking up little things that have slowed me down.

• 46:44Lilly Singh?

  I use this analogy a lot of Mario and Mario Kart. And so I always consider my day a race. You can call it unhealthy, but I think it's fun and cute. And so, what banana peels did I deal with? I'm always gonna address the next day. And so during the day, I'm always thinking of those things, of what slowed me down and what I can improve on.

• 47:00Lewis Howes?

  What's the thing you're most proud of that maybe most people don't know about you?

• 47:04Lilly Singh?

  Hmm, what am I most proud of?

• 47:09Lilly Singh?

  I am proud that in

• 47:15Lilly Singh?

  the vast amount of priorities you can have in a day and in life, being, or at least trying and valuing being a kind person is still very high on my priority list. And I think it's easy when you're on set, or it's easy when you have so many people working for you. It's easy to not care about that. You know, it is. And I almost, I don't wanna give people a pass when they're rude on set. I don't think it's right. But I could see how they think that's okay, because I'll go onto a set, and people will cater to me left, right, and center in ways where I'm almost uncomfortable with, because I'm like, no, like, treat me like a human. I've seen If I'm even having a bad day and I might come across rude, no one calls me out on it.

• 47:58Lilly Singh?

  No one will be like, that's not right, unless I do it myself.

• 48:02Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 48:02Lilly Singh?

  And so I can see how when you're constantly around that environment, you might be like, I'm allowed to do this, this is what I'm supposed to do. I'm proud that I still call myself out on crap, you know? And I hope that maintains, like, an example is yesterday, not to toot my own horn, but I, yesterday, I realized that I have a shooter, and he's a phenomenal shooter filmmaker. But we butt heads a lot on set because he's fixated on these minor, minor lighting details that I could care less about because I don't see them, because my eye is not trained to see them.

• 48:30Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 48:31Lilly Singh?

  And so I'll always be like, kind of, hurry up, we need to shoot, we need to shoot. And so I called myself out and I was like, well, you know, his intentions are to make this the best thing. And so I had to have a talk with him, I was like, I'm sorry if I was like, being a little bit of a jerk to you, I get where your intentions are and I'll try to work on it.

• 48:46Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 48:46Lilly Singh?

  And I'm proud that I'm able to see that because very few times will anyone else call me out on that.

• 48:52Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah, that's good.

• 48:54Lilly Singh?

  I want to be a nice person, I don't want to lose that.

• 48:56Lewis Howes?

  You are a nice person.

• 48:56Lilly Singh?

  Thank you.

• 48:57Lewis Howes?

  Keep it though.

• 48:57Lilly Singh?

  I want to maintain, I do, I am one of those people, call it or not, that believes that compassion and kindness can actually change the world. I really do believe that.

• 49:08Lewis Howes?

  What's the question you wish more people would ask you?

• 49:13Lilly Singh?

  I wish more people would ask me, and we spoke about this a bit before we started recording, what is something you were blatantly wrong about? What are something that you believe that you don't believe right now? Because I think when people look at journeys of people, they think they're very like this, but really they're like this, and like this, and like this, and like this, and there's a lot of things I've changed my mind about, you know, there's a lot of things I've learned, and there's even times where I've eaten my words, I'm like, oh, that's not, that's not right at all, I don't believe that. Um, and so I wish people would dissect those elements of my story a bit more because those are the parts people actually need to learn from. You know, is that you will change and grow as a person, and that is not a bad thing.

• 49:48Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah. Before I ask the final few questions, do you guys have one, anything come up for you? Anything I missed?

• 49:55Lilly Singh?

  You want to repeat it?

• 49:56Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 49:57Lilly Singh?

  Okay, good.

• 49:57Lewis Howes?

  Tiff asked a question.

• 49:58Lilly Singh?

  All right, Tiff asked a great, phenomenal question, which was, you know, as a woman of color, has that impacted my journey? Am I caught, am I aware of it, um, and how has that been in general, I think, with, with the trajectory of my career? It's interesting, it's kind of multifaceted in a lot of ways because I'm obviously, I'm aware, I'm a woman of color, you know, like, take a shower every day, I'm aware. But when things happen, you know, when I get, write a book or when I, I achieve things and people say, well, how does it feel as a woman of color? I'm like, I wasn't really thinking of it as a woman of color in that moment, you know, I wasn't accepting award being like, well, with brown skin and a vagina, I think, you know, but then sometimes I do.

• 50:42Lilly Singh?

  So it's kind of an on and off relationship where I'm aware, and I, I made a post about this, where I'm aware that especially doing things online. Do I face a lot of really intense sexism with opportunities? I don't think so. I don't think I get less opportunities on YouTube because of a woman. That's a great thing about the digital space. I think that's a great example for Hollywood. There's no casting director in front of the upload button. You know, the number one influencer is the woman, you know? And I think a lot of, a lot of other industries could take notes, just saying. But at the same time, do I face sexism in other ways? Of course. Of course, there's the YouTube comments that are like, make me a sandwich, do that. But at a deeper level, when I make, for example, one of my most hated videos or disliked videos is why I don't need a relationship.

• 51:27Lilly Singh?

  That is one of my most disliked videos. It is me ranting about all the reasons I don't think I need a boyfriend. I don't want a boyfriend. It is the same type of humor as a video I would make called Five Things I Love About Relationships. It's the same type of wittiness. It's the same everything. The only difference is I'm saying why I don't think I need a relationship. Comments. You are so stuck up. You are one of those girls that just thinks you're better than everybody. So what? You're so into, but this is why I hate feminism. And that's the type of sexism I deal with. Whereas if I have a strong viewpoint about something or I'm really direct about something, I will more often be called rude and harsh than some, perhaps, not for sure, perhaps if my male counterpart would have done it.

• 52:12Lilly Singh?

  And I think that's consistent across a lot of industries, which is a strong point of view is not perceived in the same type of epicness. Um, if a female did it as if a male did it. And so I do deal with that a lot, but. Otherwise, I've always said as a woman of color, my, my one line is I can make a billion videos about why racism is wrong and why sexism is wrong. And I have a few, you know, when I'm feeling sassy, I have a few, but I know the most impactful way to challenge that is to be the most successful woman of color I can be. You know, that's when people see me on a billboard, that will probably speak way more volumes than me making a five-minute video. Explain to people that probably won't listen anyways as to why racism, racism sexism is wrong.

• 52:50Lewis Howes?

  I love that. Do you have one? Christine is asking, in the first two years when you knew what you were doing, but other people didn't understand it, what kept fueling you? When you had other things to do with your time?

• 53:02Lilly Singh?

  Right, I think it was definitely that challenge of I don't know anything about this world. Cause I also, I might have known more than my parents, but I also didn't know a lot about YouTube. I was like, what are, what are an analytics? You know, I was like, what are these things? How, I had no idea. With dance, I had an idea. You know, I was like, I know I have to do this, I have to choreograph, this is how long this is. With YouTube, I had no idea. This is a brand new thing I had to learn about. Every part of it I had to learn about. I think that challenge really drove me to be like, well, maybe you can learn about this, maybe you can make your own rules. Right? It was also me, I had summer jobs and part-time jobs growing up forever. And when I decided to make YouTube my career, even though no one else understood, to this day, people are like, you get paid off making videos, right?

• 53:45Lilly Singh?

  That's what excited me. It was the, oh, so I can make my own rules. I don't have to get up at nine. I don't have to go to work. I don't have to punch in and out. I don't have to listen to what someone else is telling me to. I can make my own rules and that really excited me. You know, maybe it was the idea that no one really understood that drove me further, because I could be like, I'm gonna make you understand now.

• 54:04Lewis Howes?

  Right, right.

• 54:05Lilly Singh?

  And you know, that's exciting, because it's exciting to say that my parents, people who did not get the internet, now can confidently speak about the digital space in YouTube and that's through me educating them about that. And that's, that's awesome.

• 54:16Lewis Howes?

  I think it took me like eight years until my family finally figured out what I was doing.

• 54:20Lilly Singh?

  Yeah.

• 54:20Lewis Howes?

  They were still like, they're like, how you have money and how are you, what is this? They just didn't understand it. They're like, what?

• 54:26Lilly Singh?

  The proudest moment, one of the proudest moments I've ever had, so am I talking too much? One of the proudest moments, they're like, we can just deal with it in edit. One of the proudest moments I've ever had was, you know, for years I was like, every Monday and Thursday I'm making videos. I lived with my parents for a really, really long time, up until I was 26. And I had to make videos while living in their house. And so they didn't always get why I needed to be quiet and why they couldn't yell on the phone and why I needed costumes and needed this. And one of the proudest moments was, I remember one Thursday, my dad was like, Lily, I need you to go somewhere with me to the bank. And my mom, before I even answered, she's like, She can't, you know it's Thursday. And I was like, oh my goodness. You are valuing what I do as a thing that needs to be prioritized. And I will always remember that because I was like, you are, you get it.

• 55:11Lewis Howes?

  That's cool.

• 55:11Lilly Singh?

  Yeah.

• 55:12Lewis Howes?

  That's very cool. Um, final couple of questions.

• 55:15Lilly Singh?

  Okay.

• 55:17Lewis Howes?

  This is called the three truths.

• 55:18Lilly Singh?

  Okay.

• 55:19Lewis Howes?

  So imagine that this is the last video you're ever gonna put up.

• 55:24Lilly Singh?

  Oh my god.

• 55:24Lewis Howes?

  I'm gonna ask you a question and this, and the answer you give is the last video that you get to put up.

• 55:28Lilly Singh?

  Okay.

• 55:30Lewis Howes?

  And um, for whatever reason, every other video and book and thing you've done is, is erased. This is just one video left to the world.

• 55:37Lilly Singh?

  Got it.

• 55:38Lewis Howes?

  Of your message. It's called the three truths. And imagine that everyone turned on their computer or their phone and they're watching this video live. And it'll be recorded, but they'll watch it live and they can understand you.

• 55:49Lilly Singh?

  Sounds great so far.

• 55:50Lewis Howes?

  So they're listening, they're watching you live as you're gonna answer this. What would you say are your three truths? The three things you've learned about your entire life, the lessons that you would wanna share with the world as your final video, your three truths?

• 56:05Lilly Singh?

  One would definitely be, there is very seldom right and wrong. There is more often different. And a lot of our problems would be resolved in life if we understood that. Another would be,

• 56:21Lilly Singh?

  in a lot of issues in the world and in life and in comedy and anything you do in life can often be divided into two solutions. One is courage and love and the other is fear and hate. If you dissect most of life's issues, they fall into those two categories. Fear and hate is always easier. Love and courage is always harder. Love and courage will more likely be worth the fight of it being harder. Um, and the last thing I would say is, No one has it figured out. We're all making it up as we go along. So make it up as best as you can.

• 56:58Lewis Howes?

  There you go. Those are great.

• 57:00Lilly Singh?

  Yeah.

• 57:02Lewis Howes?

  I want to acknowledge you for a moment, Lily, for your incredible courage to go after something of the unknown, but to tap into the young girl that you once were, which was being creative, being fun, trying new things, making mistakes and figuring it out as you went.

• 57:18Lilly Singh?

  Thank you.

• 57:18Lewis Howes?

  You inspire so many people around the world who watch, come to your events, who read your book, and I just think you're an incredible inspiration.

• 57:26Lilly Singh?

  Thank you.

• 57:27Lewis Howes?

  And so talented and so giving of your heart. So I acknowledge you for your consistent dedication every single day to be the best that you want to be, because you're inspiring people in that journey.

• 57:39Lilly Singh?

  That's very sweet. Thank you so, so much. And I do have to commend you because before we started this, you said, "I want, what would make this the best podcast is if you talked about things you've never talked about." And I definitely did that. I feel like this is the best, one of the best things I've ever done, to be honest. So if we could just promote this everywhere.

• 57:55Lewis Howes?

  Drop the mic.

• 57:55Lilly Singh?

  I'm just gonna promote it everywhere because I really think these conversations were really dope. So thank you for digging deep and being so open and receptive. It was really, really great.

• 58:04Lewis Howes?

  It's powerful.

• 58:05Lilly Singh?

  Thank you.

• 58:05Lewis Howes?

  Final question.

• 58:06Lilly Singh?

  Yes.

• 58:06Lewis Howes?

  Before I ask it, I want to make sure everyone goes through the book, How to Be a Boss, A Guide to Conquering Life, and to follow you, subscribe, where's the best places they should go?

• 58:18Lilly Singh?

  Yes, you can go at youtube.com/lillysing, L-I-L-L-Y-S-I-N-G-H. And my socials or everything else are IiSuperwomanII because...

• 58:28Lewis Howes?

  Why, why'd you do that?

• 58:29Lilly Singh?

  I didn't know what a trademark was, seven years ago.

• 58:33Lewis Howes?

  Got it. Why didn't you use your personal name then?

• 58:35Lilly Singh?

  Why did I use for YouTube?

• 58:37Lewis Howes?

  Why did not?

• 58:37Lilly Singh?

  Why didn't I?

• 58:38Lewis Howes?

  Why didn't you use it for Instagram or Twitter?

• 58:39Lilly Singh?

  Because seven years ago, oh, seven years ago, everything was IiSuperwomanII. Even YouTube is IiSuperwomanII. I just have multiple URLs that work.

• 58:45Lewis Howes?

  Got it.

• 58:46Lilly Singh?

  But seven years ago, I was like, "Oh, I really liked that hip hop song by Lil Mo and Fabulous." And I used to call myself Superwoman well before making YouTube videos. It's like, "Oh, this is gonna be a fun little side project. Let me do Superwoman."

• 58:55Lewis Howes?

  Have you ever thought about changing it to your name?

• 58:58Lilly Singh?

  Dwayne wants us to, so we'll see. I haven't decided yet, but I'm trying to call myself Lily more and more though.

• 59:05Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, cool. Okay, so guys, go get the book. You're not on tour anymore. It's towards over.

• 59:11Lilly Singh?

  I have one more stop in Trinidad, but after that it's done.

• 59:13Lewis Howes?

  It's done. But follow her, watch her videos, they're hilarious. Watch the one of her in the shower recently, which is hilarious.

• 59:20Lilly Singh?

  And also, any of my fans who are here for the first time, please make sure you follow Lewis as well, because you won't regret it.

• 59:25Lewis Howes?

  Appreciate it, appreciate it. Final question is, what's your definition of greatness?

• 59:32Lilly Singh?

  My definition of greatness. My definition of greatness is to excel at whatever you think is of value to excel in without having to pull anyone or anything else back. It is to move forward while bringing everything else around you in forward momentum as well.

• 59:53Lewis Howes?

  You're a boss, ladies and gentlemen.

• 59:55Lilly Singh?

  Takes one to know one.

• 59:56Lewis Howes?

  Appreciate it.

• 59:56Lilly Singh?

  Thank you.

• 59:59Lewis Howes?

  There you have it, guys. If you enjoyed this, if you were inspired by this, if you got some inspiration and you learned some things, then make sure to share this with your friends. LewisHowes.com/506. Tweet out some of the tweetables that are on the show notes right there. You can watch the full video interview at the show notes as well on YouTube. Make sure to tag Lily, tag myself on social media. Let us know what you think about it. Let us know what you're learning, what you're gaining from this experience. And share this with your friends. The way that we grow is by sharing. Sharing is caring. Let's do this, guys. And if you enjoyed this, make sure to leave a review of this episode over on iTunes. Just click on the podcast app that you're listening to or online on iTunes

• 1:00:44Lewis Howes?

  and leave a review at the School of Greatness Podcast for your chance to be one of the reviews of the week. And to finish this, Pablo Picasso said, "Every child is an artist. The problem is staying an artist when you grow up." Guys, use your creativity. Allow yourself to play, adventure, create something magical in the world. Don't just stay stuck in a life and a past. That you don't love. Start doing things that bring your unique experience, your unique heart, your gifts to the world. Create, design, explore, adventure. You got this. I got your back. And you know what time it is. It's time to go out there and do something great.