The 2026 Takie Awards Featuring Celebrity Guest Presenters, Blake Griffin, Blake Bortles, Brooks Koepka And More

Welcome to the 2026 Takie Awards. Over 28 Awards being given out on this years Takies including Take of the Year, Lib of the Year, Fart of the Year, Blake of the Year, Ratio of the year, Hank’s loss of the year, Gorilla Trade of the Year and tons more. You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or Netflix. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/pardon-my-take https://barstool.link/pardon-my-take

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:49Speaker 00

  On today's Pardon My Take presented by DraftKings, it is the 2026 Takey Awards, and we are ready for an incredible award show, boys. We have 28 awards we're giving out. Take of the year, lib of the year, fart of the year, Blake of the year, and of course, award-winning listeners of the year. We're gonna get right back to the show. The Stella Blue Coffee Golden Mug giveaway is back, and eight lucky winners are gonna win big prizes now through Friday, November 6. Buy anything at stellablucoffee.com for a chance to win a PlayStation 5, Xbox Ninja Espresso Machine, large Blackstone griddle,

• 1:34Speaker 00

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• 2:28Speaker 00

  Welcome to Part of My Take presented by DraftKings. The crown is yours. Today is Friday, July 24th, and welcome to the 2026 Takey Awards.

• 2:40Speaker 02

  Yes, the most prestigious awards in podcasting. You ain't a podcast if you don't have an awards ceremony where you spend about an hour and a half sucking your own dick. And that's what we're going to be doing today.

• 2:51Speaker 00

  What, uh, is this the 10th?

• 2:53Speaker 02

  It is the 10th, yeah.

• 2:54Speaker 00

  It has to be, right?

• 2:55Speaker 02

  Yeah, we did it year one.

• 2:56Speaker 00

  Memes? Is it the 10th or the 11th?

• 2:57Speaker 03

  I think it's the 11th.

• 2:58Speaker 04

  I think it's the 11th.

• 2:59Speaker 00

  It's the 11th Takeys?

• 3:00Speaker 04

  But it also could be the 10th.

• 3:02Speaker 00

  Yeah, we, we, we had this discussion the other day and it was tough to figure out.

• 3:06Speaker 02

  It might be 11th.

• 3:07Speaker 00

  2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26.

• 3:16Speaker 02

  I think it's 11.

• 3:18Speaker 00

  Did we do one the first year?

• 3:19Speaker 02

  I think we did.

• 3:19Speaker 03

  Yeah, we did.

• 3:20Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:20Speaker 04

  But everyone says nine time AWO.

• 3:22Speaker 00

  Because I don't know if we gave it away that year.

• 3:24Speaker 02

  We had an awards ceremony, but that category did not exist in year one of the, in year zero of the Takeys.

• 3:30Speaker 00

  And it also wasn't a full year of PMT, so.

• 3:34Speaker 04

  I think that's year zero. I think, I think, so I think this is the, this should be year 10.

• 3:39Speaker 03

  It's the 11th Takeys.

• 3:40Speaker 04

  But, but that, that should be like the.

• 3:42Speaker 02

  Max is confused.

• 3:43Speaker 00

  This is exactly how I expected it.

• 3:45Speaker 02

  When you're born, you're zero. Yeah. How many, okay. All right. Let's start this over. Let's embrace debate. How many years are in 10 years?

• 3:54Speaker 00

  10.

• 3:54Speaker 04

  10.

• 3:54Speaker 02

  I agree. Okay, we, we agree.

• 3:57Speaker 04

  But the 11th Takey.

• 3:58Speaker 02

  But it's the 11th Takey.

• 3:59Speaker 00

  It's the 11th Takeys, the 10th, the 10th year, and then.

• 4:04Speaker 04

  I, I swear last year we were like, for the 10th, for the 10th Takeys, we gotta do something big.

• 4:10Speaker 02

  We're doing something.

• 4:11Speaker 00

  What are you talking about?

• 4:11Speaker 04

  But this is the 11th.

• 4:13Speaker 00

  Oh, so we fucked up last year.

• 4:15Speaker 04

  Yeah, yes.

• 4:16Speaker 02

  That was, that was then. That was old us.

• 4:19Speaker 04

  Right.

• 4:20Speaker 00

  One year, we're gonna put it on a big, we're gonna do a big.

• 4:25Speaker 02

  We're gonna do a live show.

• 4:26Speaker 04

  In Vegas.

• 4:27Speaker 02

  In Vegas, we're gonna get all our friends.

• 4:29Speaker 00

  It's gonna be so big. We're gonna sell out MSG big. The Takeys.

• 4:35Speaker 04

  Takeys at the Sphere.

• 4:38Speaker 00

  No, the MSG Theater.

• 4:41Speaker 00

  Because then we can say we sold out of MSJ.

• 4:43Speaker 04

  Got it.

• 4:43Speaker 00

  And we'll just put in very tiny, very, very tiny font, the theater.

• 4:47Speaker 02

  We should just do it during darts day in the back of the Hulu theater.

• 4:50Speaker 00

  That would rock.

• 4:51Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:52Speaker 00

  That would rock. Uh, before we get to the awards, we have 28 awards. We have a ton of guest presenters. Has LeBron made a decision? Zach, you said today was the day.

• 5:02Speaker 05

  Today could be the day. We got a lot of hours left in this day, but I hear that around the league, they're saying like pretty strong. Today's the day LeBron James makes a decision.

• 5:09Speaker 00

  This would actually be the most annoying day for LeBron to do this because we're taping the takeys.

• 5:13Speaker 02

  Yeah. I, I still think he's going to wait until at least the weekend. There was that thing on YouTube where the Miami Heat said, they had a placeholder for a news conference, a press conference announcing LeBron James for next Monday. The Miami Heat are now looking for a new director of YouTube content after that snafu. I put it at like 75% that Barstool Sports ends up hiring the old director of content.

• 5:37Speaker 00

  I'd like to at least talk to him.

• 5:38Speaker 02

  Like that.

• 5:39Speaker 00

  They just pressed the button.

• 5:40Speaker 02

  They pressed the button. So what happened with that?

• 5:42Speaker 00

  How's that work?

• 5:43Speaker 02

  Max memes. What, diagnose what happened.

• 5:46Speaker 04

  They just didn't set it to private. So there's private and there's unlisted.

• 5:51Speaker 06

  And there's public.

• 5:53Speaker 04

  Yeah, well, and public.

• 5:54Speaker 06

  There's public. They said they just put it on public.

• 5:56Speaker 04

  No, they put it on unlisted.

• 5:59Speaker 04

  It was on unlisted, but if there, once you like put something in YouTube, you can have like generic like settings that will every time you go back and it'll like put into a certain playlist and things like that. So he put it into a playlist that was unlisted.

• 6:15Speaker 02

  Got it.

• 6:15Speaker 04

  So there's like ways to go into like their YouTube and find it through the playlist if it's unlisted.

• 6:23Speaker 02

  Okay, got it.

• 6:24Speaker 04

  I didn't know. I saw someone on Twitter talking, talking about it of like exactly how.

• 6:29Speaker 00

  So you don't know?

• 6:30Speaker 04

  No, I saw some, that they went into the playlist and found it.

• 6:34Speaker 00

  Got it.

• 6:34Speaker 04

  But I do know that if you put something as unlisted, not private, if it's unlisted, there is, there is a way to do that because I have done that before in the past.

• 6:43Speaker 02

  Can we make one that says LeBron James to Barstool Sports and just have it be not private?

• 6:50Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 6:50Speaker 02

  And just see if people find it.

• 6:52Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 6:53Speaker 02

  I have no idea how anybody would ever find it.

• 6:56Speaker 02

  Cause it's secret.

• 6:57Speaker 00

  LeBron James, the PMT.

• 6:58Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 6:59Speaker 00

  Yeah, let's post that.

• 7:02Speaker 00

  And let's see if anyone finds it.

• 7:03Speaker 02

  They probably won't because they won't know.

• 7:05Speaker 00

  They will have no idea.

• 7:06Speaker 04

  He's sitting next to Hank on the couch.

• 7:07Speaker 00

  Yeah, there he is right there.

• 7:09Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 7:09Speaker 00

  By the way, Hank, what are you wearing?

• 7:11Speaker 03

  So get dressed up for the takeys.

• 7:13Speaker 00

  And?

• 7:13Speaker 03

  So I got, I got one of my finest outfit.

• 7:15Speaker 00

  Which is?

• 7:16Speaker 03

  Uh, it's a.

• 7:17Speaker 00

  Yeah, keep going.

• 7:19Speaker 03

  My shorts, I actually don't wear my shorts or shorts are I'm wearing gym shorts. And then I have a, my white four aces polo.

• 7:26Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 7:27Speaker 03

  I have a nice blue tie and four aces hat.

• 7:29Speaker 02

  Who are the four aces again?

• 7:30Speaker 03

  Four aces.

• 7:31Speaker 00

  Oh, we should have done a takey for the four aces of the year.

• 7:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 7:34Speaker 03

  Dustin Johnson, Anthony Kim, twin Thomases.

• 7:38Speaker 00

  Who, all right, let's do it right now. Let's get ourselves prepped. Give us the takey for the four ace of the year.

• 7:44Speaker 03

  Four aces of the year has to be Anthony Kim.

• 7:47Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 7:47Speaker 03

  Comebacks, probably comeback story of the year. Uh, overall in all of sports, coming back, quit golf, went to rehab, conquered his demons, came back, won on the live tour.

• 7:59Speaker 00

  So you failed. Four ace of the year is Dustin Johnson, Anthony Kim, and the twin Thomases. You can't do one ace, they're the four aces.

• 8:08Speaker 04

  What are the twin Thomases last names?

• 8:10Speaker 03

  Peters and Dietrich.

• 8:11Speaker 02

  No, is it?

• 8:12Speaker 03

  Yeah. Yeah, they sent me, they sent me head covers. I, I see them every day.

• 8:18Speaker 02

  Wait, who's the driver?

• 8:18Speaker 03

  Actually had to stop because I had like, I had one on a three wood, one on a seven wood and they look exactly the same. So I was like, this is too confusing.

• 8:24Speaker 02

  So is it like each ace is a different head cover?

• 8:26Speaker 03

  Yeah, the, each Thomas, I just have a twin, I have a Thomas Dietrich and a Thomas Peters.

• 8:31Speaker 02

  Got it. Are you the only person in the world that, that?

• 8:34Speaker 03

  They probably do. They, one of them probably has their own.

• 8:37Speaker 02

  If.

• 8:37Speaker 03

  And then me.

• 8:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 8:40Speaker 00

  So it's all four aces. We gotta give all, oh, the, the four aces of the, four ace of the year is all four aces. The takey award. So we've given out, we're going to get out 29 awards. Congratulations to all four aces. Congratulations. They should make a head cover that's just for your driver and it's Tiger.

• 8:57Speaker 02

  That's good.

• 8:58Speaker 00

  And it's SUV.

• 8:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 9:00Speaker 00

  Tiger might win an award today.

• 9:02Speaker 02

  We'll see.

• 9:03Speaker 00

  He's a nominee. Before we start, so two things that happened. One, I won the 50 50 again.

• 9:11Speaker 02

  Congrats.

• 9:12Speaker 00

  Which is crazy.

• 9:13Speaker 02

  Unreal. I woke up to that news. I was, so I went to bed last night, knowing that I had to wake up for wake up bar stool early this morning. I woke up, I usually try to catch up on my texts from last night. I thought that I was still asleep. I thought that it was a dream because there's no chance in hell that big cat won the 50 50 again.

• 9:30Speaker 00

  Look at these fucking guys. What are you guys doing with your fingers up?

• 9:33Speaker 02

  Wimpy fingers.

• 9:35Speaker 00

  What are you thinking? Go ahead, speak. You think it's rigged?

• 9:40Speaker 04

  50 50 rig?

• 9:41Speaker 00

  Why?

• 9:42Speaker 04

  Well, you, you, you won the 50 50.

• 9:46Speaker 00

  Correct.

• 9:47Speaker 04

  And then Monday, you got the big check.

• 9:48Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 9:49Speaker 04

  And then Monday, you sold the most amount of 50 50 tickets of all time.

• 9:54Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 9:55Speaker 04

  Then Wednesday, you win the 50 50 again.

• 9:56Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 9:57Speaker 04

  You're gonna get another big check.

• 9:59Speaker 00

  But I'm probably not gonna do the same selling thing. I'm just getting the big check this time.

• 10:03Speaker 04

  You're not gonna do the?

• 10:04Speaker 00

  No, they, unless they do like 75 25. Those are my demands.

• 10:10Speaker 00

  75 25 for the people.

• 10:11Speaker 02

  I did call.

• 10:12Speaker 00

  Otherwise, I'm not gonna help.

• 10:13Speaker 04

  But I think, I do think that there's, that what if the Cubs were like, if they were smart, they were like, if, whenever this guy wins a 50 50, charity gets a lot more money.

• 10:21Speaker 00

  This is not the worst. And I also just give it all to charity.

• 10:24Speaker 04

  Right.

• 10:25Speaker 00

  It's 100% charity.

• 10:26Speaker 04

  It's good, it's good for, it's good for the league for you to win.

• 10:30Speaker 00

  I'm just happy I won again. I'm, I feel like I may never lose again at this point. Cause it's just, I've won two times, meme still hasn't gotten the lottery ball.

• 10:40Speaker 02

  I did win it.

• 10:41Speaker 03

  I got a question.

• 10:42Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 10:43Speaker 03

  Now that, you know, you have, there's, there's a pattern here. There's repeated success. It's not a fluke.

• 10:47Speaker 00

  Yeah. Should I do, should I sell a course on how to win the 50 50? Yes, I've been thinking about that.

• 10:52Speaker 03

  Statistically speaking, when you win the 50 50, the Cubs lose. If it's late in the season and the Cubs are making a playoff push, do you buy tickets for the 50 50?

• 11:01Speaker 00

  Yeah. I, we gotta test it. We gotta see.

• 11:04Speaker 03

  It's been tested.

• 11:05Speaker 00

  Twice. That's not.

• 11:06Speaker 03

  No, the first time, first time's a fluke. Second time's a test.

• 11:09Speaker 00

  No, no, that's not a.

• 11:10Speaker 03

  We've done a study.

• 11:10Speaker 00

  That's not a sample size. A sample size has to be more than 10.

• 11:13Speaker 02

  No, no, no.

• 11:14Speaker 00

  I gotta win it 10 times.

• 11:16Speaker 02

  How many times? Two times is a sample. How many times would you say that you've played the 50 50?

• 11:19Speaker 00

  Every single time for 15 years.

• 11:21Speaker 02

  Have you figured out how many games? Like if you were to ballpark that?

• 11:24Speaker 00

  They won, they won a World Series the year that I played it a lot.

• 11:27Speaker 02

  But you didn't win. But you didn't win.

• 11:29Speaker 00

  But it's gotta be more than two times for a sample size. I don't like what you guys are doing. I'm gonna, I'm gonna focus on the fact that I'm getting another big check and I'm gonna waive. I might pay, I might not give the money, the winnings to charity. I might give the money to the person operating the camera at Wrigley Field and be like, buddy, you gotta stay on me for 10 minutes. I'm gonna waive for 10 minutes straight.

• 11:50Speaker 02

  Yeah. Do, do what your heart feels.

• 11:52Speaker 00

  Oh, I'm gonna wave.

• 11:52Speaker 02

  Cause whatever you did, it ended up making, yeah, it made it work. And somebody asked me this morning if you were gonna quit.

• 11:59Speaker 00

  No.

• 12:00Speaker 02

  I laughed in their face. I said, if there was a time to quit, it probably was after the first win.

• 12:05Speaker 00

  Correct.

• 12:05Speaker 02

  But now that you have two.

• 12:07Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 12:08Speaker 02

  You have a chance to achieve something like incredible isn't even the right word for it.

• 12:13Speaker 00

  I'm on the cusp of greatness.

• 12:14Speaker 02

  Magic was the word I was gonna use. Like this could be, you would go down in the history books as the luckiest human being to ever live. If you can hit the 50 50 three times.

• 12:24Speaker 00

  Multiple times.

• 12:25Speaker 02

  No one's ever done that. Now you have the opportunity to do that.

• 12:28Speaker 00

  Martino has like five times, but I would be,

• 12:33Speaker 00

  it would be incredible if I did it. And I only spent, I didn't spend that much money on it last night. Just, nice little, little donation of the pot, won it. I was in shock. It's, it's awesome. What? What are you laughing at?

• 12:46Speaker 02

  I feel like you were about to say how much money, how much money you spent last night and then you were like, that's actually a lot of money. So I'm not going to say it.

• 12:51Speaker 00

  Well, I got home and my wife is a hater of my 50 50. She's, she is, she is, uh, she thought I could never win it. Now she's like, shit, he's actually won it twice. But she's like, how much did you spend tonight? And I was like a thousand dollars. And I was like, that's not that much. She's like, are you comparing it to what you spent on Monday? Cause I know what you spent on Monday. And I was like, I, that's exactly what I'm doing. Cause Monday got out of hand and I did not win it then. But that's okay. I won. I won. Two time winner.

• 13:19Speaker 02

  A win is a win.

• 13:20Speaker 00

  A win is a win.

• 13:21Speaker 02

  Is a win.

• 13:21Speaker 00

  A win is memes wouldn't know. He's never won the lottery ball.

• 13:24Speaker 02

  I won.

• 13:25Speaker 00

  No, you haven't. You have not.

• 13:27Speaker 02

  It's the first show of the year.

• 13:27Speaker 00

  You've not won the lottery.

• 13:29Speaker 02

  We had to get a new machine.

• 13:31Speaker 00

  I'm going to just try to keep winning. You guys cool with that?

• 13:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 13:34Speaker 00

  I might win it at the bananas this weekend. Taking my kids. Going to win that.

• 13:38Speaker 02

  What's 50 50 going to be like at the banana?

• 13:40Speaker 00

  Oh, I already checked. I asked them. I was like, is there going to be a 50 50? They're like, yeah. All right, cool. I'll be there. I'm going to win that.

• 13:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 13:46Speaker 00

  But it's 50. What if I just got like a big banana? Half a one.

• 13:50Speaker 02

  I mean, you have to be presented, I would assume by the bananas.

• 13:53Speaker 00

  You'd think.

• 13:54Speaker 02

  Next time they're in town.

• 13:55Speaker 00

  You'd think.

• 13:55Speaker 02

  Are they going to do a big check?

• 13:57Speaker 00

  The bananas?

• 13:57Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 13:58Speaker 00

  That would be.

• 13:59Speaker 02

  Or like, is this check, I don't mean any disrespect to the check that you got.

• 14:02Speaker 00

  No.

• 14:03Speaker 02

  First night, but.

• 14:03Speaker 00

  All, all disrespect to the check. It wasn't big enough.

• 14:06Speaker 02

  Uh, maybe I'm just sensitized as to what a big check is.

• 14:09Speaker 00

  No, PFT.

• 14:10Speaker 02

  When I think big check, I think, I think the JJ Watt check that we had.

• 14:13Speaker 00

  PFT. You're exactly right.

• 14:15Speaker 02

  Martina Navratilova.

• 14:16Speaker 00

  Yes. Yes. The big check.

• 14:17Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:18Speaker 00

  That you're, it's no, it's all disrespect to that check. I will be bringing my own big check to my big next big check.

• 14:25Speaker 02

  It could be bigger.

• 14:26Speaker 00

  I'm going to bring my own big check and I'm like, you gotta deal with it Cubs.

• 14:30Speaker 02

  Because it's kind of like, you know, it's.

• 14:32Speaker 00

  BYO BC.

• 14:33Speaker 02

  For charity, the bigger the check, you think yourself like every inch that this check is, that could have been another meal, but for somebody that needs it.

• 14:42Speaker 00

  I want to bring a big check that's like the, like the American flag that they, they take out on the outfield. That's how I want, how big of a check I want.

• 14:50Speaker 02

  If you, if you get, if you win it a third time, here's what I'll do for you. I will have a skywriting plane.

• 14:57Speaker 00

  Ooh.

• 14:57Speaker 02

  Drag a giant check in the air behind it over Wrigley Field, like the biggest possible check.

• 15:04Speaker 00

  I like.

• 15:04Speaker 02

  We're talking like hundreds of feet.

• 15:06Speaker 00

  Hundreds of feet. I love that. Yeah. Speaking of, is it, this is just type, totally hypothetical question.

• 15:13Speaker 00

  Lame or not lame?

• 15:16Speaker 00

  To make a couple banners for yourself after winning the 50 50 for the second time?

• 15:21Speaker 04

  You said a couple?

• 15:22Speaker 00

  Well, I've won it twice. I have a banner for each win.

• 15:25Speaker 04

  Oh, I thought you were gonna do like the. You could, you could do it like. 50 50 is one.

• 15:32Speaker 00

  No, no, no.

• 15:33Speaker 04

  25, 26.

• 15:34Speaker 00

  You gotta, you gotta hang a banner every time. I didn't want to hang one banner. I wanted to wait till I won second.

• 15:39Speaker 02

  I thought maybe, or like Billy Joel at the Garden. You have one giant banner and now it just says, Big Cat 2.

• 15:45Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 15:46Speaker 03

  Well, you couldn't, you could.

• 15:46Speaker 00

  The dates on it.

• 15:47Speaker 03

  You could make it like, you know, like when they have like the scoring record of the school where it's like 50 50 raffle one, Big Cat date big, cause other people might win.

• 15:56Speaker 00

  Come on. Oh, actually, no, you're right. If I do the course. If I teach you guys.

• 16:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:01Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah. I'm gonna sell that course. All right. That's a good call. Maybe it's, yeah, maybe it's that. Okay.

• 16:06Speaker 04

  I think it's just one banner.

• 16:07Speaker 00

  Yeah, one banner. All right. I'm gonna sell.

• 16:09Speaker 04

  Cause when it's the second time, it's kinda like having a second kid.

• 16:11Speaker 00

  All right. So I might, yeah.

• 16:12Speaker 02

  But then you, you can do a different, you can do a different banner drop every time you win it, obviously. It's a new banner, but it just, it takes the place of the old.

• 16:21Speaker 00

  All right. So I now have two banners that I'm gonna have to figure out what to do with, and then we'll make it one banner. I think I already ordered them.

• 16:28Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 16:29Speaker 00

  Lame or not lame? That's a fun game.

• 16:31Speaker 02

  We should auction those off.

• 16:32Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 16:32Speaker 02

  50 50.

• 16:33Speaker 00

  Also, Patrick came back to the Blackhawks, which was awesome. Do you think LeBron sees that? He's like, yeah, I should do that.

• 16:40Speaker 02

  I'm coming home.

• 16:41Speaker 00

  To the Blackhawks. LeBron decides to play hockey.

• 16:44Speaker 02

  That might, that might spur him on.

• 16:46Speaker 03

  He just thinks it's, it's whatever 2017 again, or 2015.

• 16:50Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 16:50Speaker 03

  2014.

• 16:51Speaker 00

  Where he won the most of his rings. It's so sick though. I fucking love Kane and the fact that he's back is so awesome. It's gonna be. He's, he's the man.

• 17:01Speaker 02

  Showtime.

• 17:01Speaker 00

  Showtime.

• 17:02Speaker 02

  What this does tell me about, about LeBron though, the fact that he hasn't announced it yet, every day that goes by without an announcement makes me less inclined to think that's Cleveland. Because he's waiting.

• 17:12Speaker 00

  I'd agree.

• 17:12Speaker 02

  He's waiting for something to make his decision. If his decision was go to Cleveland. Then there's absolutely nothing holding him back from being like, I'm coming home. No one's going to hate on it. Everyone's going to be happy for him. Everyone's going to be happy for Cleveland. There's absolutely nothing. There's zero to wait on with maybe the exception of he might want James Harden gone before he gets to town.

• 17:32Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 17:32Speaker 02

  Maybe that could be it, but I think for the most part, it's like, if it's Cleveland, he should have said it already.

• 17:37Speaker 00

  Yeah. And I think you nailed it the other day when he's just trying to get Anthony Davis.

• 17:41Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:41Speaker 00

  So maybe just, maybe they just figure out a way to go to the Wizards.

• 17:45Speaker 02

  Price went up. You really want to play with AD? I got, I know just the spot.

• 17:49Speaker 00

  But yeah, Patrick Kane, I was, I was just like washed over. I was just watching highlights all morning, just washed over with nostalgia. Just like, and he's still good. He's not obviously prime Patrick Kane, but he's still good. And it's good, like a veteran presence. It's going to be awesome. It's be awesome to watch him and Bedard when Bedard gets back. So I'm very, very excited. I was just listening to old thing back all the way, like five times in a row on the way in from, from the 2015 team. So, um, okay. Should we do the takeies? We're going to get right back to the show. Stella Blue Coffee's new can lattes are here. Crafted with a hundred percent Colombian coffee. Each can is a good source of protein and comes in two smooth flavors, espresso cafe moka and espresso sweet cream.

• 18:29Speaker 00

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• 19:13Speaker 00

  The awards change every year. We have some repeat awards. We always do takey of the year. We always do Blake of the year, just log off of the year. Uh, we have new awards. We have some old awards, but we're going to be giving away 28 takey awards, 29 if you count the four aces and we're going to start with the first award where we always start. Take of the year award, the take of the year. By the way, shout out our guy Fred Segal, uh, freezing cold takes. He helps us with this award every single year. He also has a new book coming out, uh, same day as our book. So buy them both.

• 19:48Speaker 02

  Love it.

• 19:49Speaker 00

  Buy them both. Freezing cold takes college football, August 18th. Buy it and buy the pardon my take book at the same time. Uh, he's the man and he always helps us. And he has just a treasure trove of takes. So the nominees, there's a lot. This is our most nominated award. I'm going to go through them. We're going to start with just, there's just a Knicks section of this award.

• 20:08Speaker 02

  There's plenty to.

• 20:09Speaker 00

  There's a lot of Knicks. So we have, uh, to start Brandon Tierney, Brandon Tierney is a, uh,

• 20:17Speaker 02

  He was a old radio guy for WFM, no, no, no longer.

• 20:23Speaker 00

  Brandon Tierney tweeted, uh, in January 15th, 2026, I've never wavered on this and I never will. Knicks aren't winning a damn thing with cat being a primary piece of the puzzle. Never was that guy, never will be that guy. That's a tough one. We also have, uh, uh, former colleague, uh, Jeff, they do saying going to be so funny. Watching the Knicks get dummied in the finals.

• 20:48Speaker 02

  Would have been funny. He's right.

• 20:49Speaker 00

  Current colleague, Chris Klemmer, uh, in replying to a meek Phil tweet, who said that the Knicks are now the, uh, odds on favorite to win the Eastern Conference. He was, he replied, you have zero chance of winning a title. Bookmark this, you will never experience joy.

• 21:07Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 21:07Speaker 00

  The bookmark this really adds it. Klemmer really went for it there.

• 21:10Speaker 02

  Yeah. Then you will never experience joy too. It felt, uh, felt personal.

• 21:14Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 21:14Speaker 02

  Almost like he told him to go to an apple store.

• 21:16Speaker 00

  Yeah. Yeah. Never ever.

• 21:18Speaker 02

  Don't tell him.

• 21:20Speaker 00

  Emmanuel Ocho, who's won some takeys in the past, said one quarter into the NBA finals, Jalen Brunson is affirming the concerns people have about small guards being able to win it all. The closer you get, the more physical it gets. So, so far Brunson's body is betraying him.

• 21:34Speaker 02

  Hmm. Becky Hammond burner.

• 21:36Speaker 00

  Jalen Brunson went on to win NBA MVP.

• 21:38Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. But also he's small. So can you really trust a small guard?

• 21:41Speaker 00

  That's true.

• 21:44Speaker 00

  And then our friend, Nick Wright, this is just a graphic of his, of his final four in the NBA playoffs. And then champion, he had the Thunder. So you got that right?

• 21:54Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 21:54Speaker 00

  Credit him. Thunder playing the Nuggets, Nuggets beating the Thunder to go to the finals. Nuggets lost in the first round?

• 22:02Speaker 02

  They did.

• 22:03Speaker 00

  Okay. And then the Celtics beating the Pistons and then the Celtics beating the Nuggets. So his finals was the two first round losers Celtics Nuggets Celtics winning.

• 22:13Speaker 02

  That's tough. That's a bad look, Nick. Sorry.

• 22:16Speaker 00

  Okay, that's our Knicks takey's section. We also have from Dave Biddle. This, this came out in, it was a couple of years ago, but a lot of these are, they come to fruition. It take ages like wine. He said, OSU dodged a bullet with Dusty May. Not sure if Jake Diebler will be great, but May's claim to fame is a lucky postseason run last year. You had never heard of him before that. And don't forget FAU got to play 16 seeded Fairleigh Dickinson in the second round.

• 22:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's right. And then that's all they did, right? Was they beat Fairleigh Dickinson the second round? Then they immediately lost or did they? No, they actually won a bunch of games that year. Dusty May, good coach, onto the big leagues.

• 22:55Speaker 00

  Yeah, won a title. Now he's with the Mavs. A Michigan edition of, of the takey of the year award. We had from December 7th, 2025, Michigan head coach Sharon Moore says he does not expect any more changes to the football staff this off season. Whoops.

• 23:13Speaker 02

  When you've got the culture built that you need, the one that you've been aiming for, you almost reach a point where you're like, nobody move.

• 23:19Speaker 00

  Yeah. I love, I love this one. I think he was fired, what, like two days later?

• 23:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's pretty, pretty quick after that. Yeah.

• 23:25Speaker 00

  We also have Michigan AD Ward Manuel, who is, I think he's nominated for a takey later as well. So double nomination. He said about Dusty May and his contract extension, he will be the leader of this basketball team for many years to come. Manuel said at Saturday's national championship celebration. It was like, maybe like two more months?

• 23:47Speaker 02

  He has a couple more months. I mean, credit to Ward Manuel though, because we talk about accountability. And Dusty May leaves. Now Ward Manuel is going to follow soon after because he's embarrassed that he was wrong about the Dusty May thing.

• 23:59Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 23:59Speaker 02

  So he's like, hand up. I probably shouldn't work here anymore. Michigan, man, I'll take the blame for that.

• 24:04Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 24:04Speaker 02

  Um, so you can expect to see him on the move.

• 24:06Speaker 00

  Yes, absolutely. We have now, uh, some more college football, uh, category here, not, not just, uh, Michigan, but this one is from Bill Simmons from 2024 that came to fruition. He said, uh, after watching Signetti in a playoff game for three hours, are people still unsure if Belichick will succeed in college football?

• 24:28Speaker 02

  That's a double.

• 24:29Speaker 00

  Double.

• 24:29Speaker 02

  That's a double take. That's pretty good.

• 24:30Speaker 00

  From both sides.

• 24:31Speaker 02

  That's why Bill is a legend because he's able to combine two bad takes into one.

• 24:36Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 24:37Speaker 02

  And no one else does it.

• 24:37Speaker 00

  That was, that was cock and mouth, cock and ass.

• 24:40Speaker 02

  Yeah, that was good. Airtight.

• 24:42Speaker 00

  Zach, what'd you? I forgot you're not a sex guy.

• 24:45Speaker 05

  Cock and mouth, cock and ass is just an extreme move. That's all.

• 24:48Speaker 00

  Yeah. It's an extreme take.

• 24:50Speaker 05

  That is a, yeah, wild take.

• 24:51Speaker 00

  I mean, listen, we all have bad takes here. We have some of the worst takes of all time.

• 24:54Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 24:55Speaker 05

  But that's a gang bang.

• 24:56Speaker 00

  I said, I said Patrick Mahomes was the biggest reach in the draft.

• 25:00Speaker 05

  Another gang bang take.

• 25:01Speaker 00

  That was a gang bang. I got, I, that might've been ass, mouth, pee hole.

• 25:08Speaker 05

  With cuck attachment.

• 25:09Speaker 00

  Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely.

• 25:11Speaker 02

  Wait, you're watching somebody else get ass, mouth, pee hole?

• 25:14Speaker 00

  No, Zach's watching me.

• 25:16Speaker 02

  Okay. So Zach is also involved in the, in the take.

• 25:18Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 25:19Speaker 02

  Okay, got it.

• 25:20Speaker 00

  How'd they get in my pee hole, Zach?

• 25:22Speaker 02

  Really small did.

• 25:23Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 25:24Speaker 05

  Loop.

• 25:25Speaker 00

  Uh, this is from our good friend, Brandon Walker, who was our college football expert two years ago. Um, he was going back and forth with a Virginia Tech fan that, uh, was saying that Virginia Tech has got a great future. And Brandon Walker said, yeah, because you think they're getting Franklin and they're not.

• 25:43Speaker 02

  Hmm. Hmm.

• 25:45Speaker 00

  They did.

• 25:45Speaker 02

  Then they got Franklin.

• 25:47Speaker 00

  They did.

• 25:47Speaker 02

  Hot seat? James Franklin hot seat?

• 25:48Speaker 00

  Hot seat for sure.

• 25:49Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 25:50Speaker 00

  We also have our, ourselves, uh, this is probably from memes, August 30th, 2025. He tweeted, Florida State football is back. They finished 13th in the ACC.

• 26:02Speaker 02

  I didn't, hand up, I didn't realize that there were 13 teams in the ACC.

• 26:06Speaker 00

  So bad.

• 26:07Speaker 06

  What was that in context?

• 26:08Speaker 00

  Uh, they beat Alabama.

• 26:09Speaker 02

  Yeah, it did.

• 26:10Speaker 06

  They were so bad.

• 26:12Speaker 02

  That was a great game. They looked like they were back. And also, you could probably include as a double win in this. We pretty much pronounced Alabama football dead.

• 26:20Speaker 00

  Yeah. Oh, multiple times. That's definitely one of our worst takes is that we were like, yeah.

• 26:24Speaker 02

  Bama will not come back from this.

• 26:26Speaker 00

  Never ever in a million years. Kalen DeBoer is out. This is a personal favorite of mine. Brian Drake tweeted during the Elite Eight games, nightmare scenario for CBS is both Elite Eight games or blowouts. Tough to see a large national audience hang out for the second half of a Duke beat down.

• 26:45Speaker 00

  So that turned out to be the most watched March Madness game this year because it was Braylon Mullens buzzer beater over Duke.

• 26:52Speaker 02

  And that's how powerful of a drug hope is. The fact that it was, it was a blowout. It was, but we all watched because what if?

• 26:59Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 27:00Speaker 02

  Cause what, what if?

• 27:01Speaker 00

  And what if happened?

• 27:02Speaker 02

  And it did.

• 27:03Speaker 00

  And it was the, I looked it up, the most watched game. I think it peaked at like 18 million viewers.

• 27:08Speaker 02

  That's so good. Yeah.

• 27:09Speaker 00

  Yeah. Um, we have, uh, this, this one's from our boss, Dave Portnoy. I, I forgot that this playoff series happened last year, but he said, the, you know what's crazy? There's a whole generation of kids who just expect the Red Sox to always beat the Yankees when it counts, no matter the situation. And the Red Sox always do. We own this team and franchise. I think that was after the Red Sox won game one of a three game series.

• 27:33Speaker 02

  I forgot about that series too.

• 27:34Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 27:35Speaker 02

  I'll be, I'll be totally honest.

• 27:37Speaker 00

  Sam Darnold takes were good. Mina Kimes, uh, when Geno Smith was traded from Seattle, said, flat out, this is a terrible move by Seattle. Chances of upgrading are extremely low.

• 27:47Speaker 02

  Kind of racist on your part though, right memes?

• 27:50Speaker 00

  No, it's from Mina.

• 27:51Speaker 02

  I know, but I'm saying like, no, for you to doubt.

• 27:53Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah.

• 27:54Speaker 02

  Kind of racist.

• 27:55Speaker 00

  True.

• 27:56Speaker 02

  Yes, extremely.

• 27:57Speaker 00

  Yes, yes. Sam Darnold did pretty well. He won a, won a Superbowl.

• 28:01Speaker 02

  Also, Geno Smith did beat the Patriots last year.

• 28:06Speaker 00

  He did. That's right. That was week. I was trying to. Another one that I have just memory hole. Yep. That's like, that was week one. Geno Smith as a Raider is just something that we, we actually just broke our, we broke our rule. Never happened.

• 28:20Speaker 02

  It's crazy that he played a whole year without a coach.

• 28:22Speaker 00

  Yeah. David Klug said, tearing down a roster that was a win away from the playoffs to build around Sam Donald is a choice.

• 28:31Speaker 02

  Fact. That is a choice.

• 28:33Speaker 00

  Yeah. This is Hank, your favorite league, the live golf league. This is from young Yassir Al Rumavin. He said, my boss told me Liv is not going to go anywhere. It will be well and truly in operation, running well past his death. He's a young guy.

• 28:50Speaker 03

  I'm confused.

• 28:51Speaker 00

  What do you mean?

• 28:52Speaker 03

  Live golf is playing a tournament as we, as we podcast.

• 28:55Speaker 00

  Are they going to be playing in Michigan?

• 28:58Speaker 03

  It hasn't been officially canceled.

• 28:59Speaker 00

  I saw there was a 5% chance it's gonna happen.

• 29:02Speaker 02

  Are they in good health?

• 29:03Speaker 03

  It's a chance.

• 29:04Speaker 02

  Is the league healthy?

• 29:05Speaker 03

  I mean, they're playing right now.

• 29:08Speaker 03

  And people are locked in.

• 29:09Speaker 02

  Okay. Yeah. Yeah. It's actually, the audience is maybe as big as ever.

• 29:13Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 29:14Speaker 00

  Okay. A couple more. We have Jason Schmitz from 2023 that came to fruition. He said, unfortunately, Taylor Swift isn't known for relationships that last longer than a few months. I would expect the breakup by Superbowl and the Kelsey album before next season. The new fans will follow Taylor to her next thing.

• 29:30Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 29:30Speaker 00

  They got married. They did P and V.

• 29:32Speaker 02

  Yeah. We, we love, love. Yeah. Congratulations. Happy couple.

• 29:36Speaker 00

  I think this is from our good friend, Big T. He said, in September, the fake news media is attempting to link Tony Vitello to the open San Francisco Giants managerial job despite the fact it doesn't make a lick of sense.

• 29:49Speaker 02

  Okay. I'm going to take Big T's side on this because it didn't make a lick of sense. I don't understand why you would make a splash hire still as like a major league baseball manager trying to get a college.

• 30:00Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 30:01Speaker 02

  A college baseball coach, whose job description is completely different from an MLB manager.

• 30:06Speaker 00

  But they did hire.

• 30:06Speaker 02

  But they did hire. It didn't make a lick of sense.

• 30:08Speaker 00

  Didn't make a lick of sense. All right. Last one. Stephen A. Smith in April said Philly fans will regret saying, we want Boston. You're not beating this Boston Celtics.

• 30:20Speaker 02

  That's a good take. They beat him.

• 30:23Speaker 00

  All right, winner. Ready? Drum roll. And the winner for take of the year for 2026 is young Yassir Al Rumavin for his take. My boss told me Liv is not going to go anywhere. It will be well and truly in operation, running well past his death. He's a young guy.

• 30:44Speaker 03

  Hmm. Now freezing cold takes is gonna have to make note of that recording.

• 30:49Speaker 00

  Okay, so this will be the take of the year in two years.

• 30:52Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 30:53Speaker 00

  Love that.

• 30:53Speaker 02

  So I like that. It, the snake feeds itself almost.

• 30:57Speaker 00

  We just did our own show.

• 30:58Speaker 02

  That guy's, that guy's boss?

• 31:00Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:00Speaker 02

  Ted Turner, by the way.

• 31:02Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 31:03Speaker 02

  I just made that part up.

• 31:04Speaker 00

  He's dead.

• 31:04Speaker 02

  I made that part up, yeah.

• 31:06Speaker 00

  That guy's boss, Ray Charles. Been dead for 20 years.

• 31:10Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 31:11Speaker 00

  Okay, all right, what do we got next?

• 31:13Speaker 02

  All right, next up in the 2026 Takey Awards, we have an award, I believe we debuted two years ago.

• 31:21Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:21Speaker 02

  Can't win the big one award.

• 31:22Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:23Speaker 02

  Can't win the big one.

• 31:24Speaker 00

  One of my favorites.

• 31:24Speaker 02

  2026, it's a good category.

• 31:28Speaker 02

  The nominees are for Can't Win The Big One, Mbappe. This is, you know, he had the shootout loss.

• 31:34Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 31:35Speaker 02

  Last time in the World Cup.

• 31:36Speaker 00

  Mm hmm.

• 31:37Speaker 02

  And this time, great, great play in the third place game.

• 31:40Speaker 00

  Lost though.

• 31:41Speaker 02

  Lost in the semifinals, Mbappe, he's, he's got all the talent in the world. He won the golden boot, but people are saying that he does not have what it takes to have France win the World Cup.

• 31:51Speaker 00

  I'd agree.

• 31:51Speaker 02

  Is he a leader capable of winning the World Cup? We don't think so.

• 31:54Speaker 03

  Can't win the Premier League either.

• 31:55Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 31:55Speaker 02

  Yep, Farmer's League.

• 31:56Speaker 00

  Mm hmm. Or the MLS.

• 31:58Speaker 02

  Can't win the big one nominee two is Wimby.

• 32:02Speaker 00

  Hmm, love this one.

• 32:03Speaker 02

  Victor Wimbenyama, this is the dawn of a narrative that we're seeing with Wimby. It felt like if he was that guy, he would have done it already.

• 32:11Speaker 00

  Well.

• 32:11Speaker 03

  Double silver medalist.

• 32:12Speaker 00

  Let's see, yeah, silver medal against Chet Holmgren, silver medal against Team USA, silver medal against the Knicks.

• 32:19Speaker 02

  Interesting.

• 32:19Speaker 00

  Triple silver medalist.

• 32:20Speaker 02

  Interesting. Dynasty of silvers.

• 32:22Speaker 00

  Yes. He's great. He might, I'll say this, Wimby might be the greatest loser we've ever seen.

• 32:28Speaker 02

  He's on pace.

• 32:29Speaker 00

  He, he absolutely could be the greatest loser we have ever seen in professional sports.

• 32:33Speaker 02

  He's definitely on pace. Uh, the third nominee is Katelyn Clark.

• 32:36Speaker 00

  Ah.

• 32:37Speaker 02

  Win the big one of the year. She didn't win in college.

• 32:40Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 32:40Speaker 02

  She hasn't won in the NBA. The only thing that she's won is like, people have lost their minds.

• 32:45Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 32:45Speaker 02

  When it comes to talk, uh, she's just collecting brains.

• 32:47Speaker 00

  She's one rent in everyone's head.

• 32:49Speaker 02

  Yes, she lives, uh, completely free. She's got a lot of real estate in every basketball writer's brain. The most recent one from what's her name? Is it Nancy Armour?

• 32:59Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 33:00Speaker 02

  Absolutely insane stuff, but again, this is good. Like it's good to have somebody in your league that makes writers lose their minds.

• 33:07Speaker 00

  What was the, what was the title of Nancy Armour?

• 33:09Speaker 02

  It was saying that she needs to stop flopping, but it was mostly the one paragraph that compared what she does to the death of Emmett Till.

• 33:19Speaker 00

  She, yeah.

• 33:19Speaker 02

  Which is just an absolutely absurd thing to make.

• 33:22Speaker 00

  Yeah. USA Today writer says Caitlyn Clark puts black and queer WNBA players in danger by flopping. Okay. Yeah, that might be taking the, that.

• 33:31Speaker 02

  It's.

• 33:32Speaker 00

  Put a pin in that one.

• 33:33Speaker 02

  It's definitely.

• 33:33Speaker 00

  Well, that might be next year's taking the year.

• 33:35Speaker 02

  It's gonna, it's gonna be nominated. So Caitlyn didn't win in college. She didn't win. I don't think she won a state title in high school either.

• 33:41Speaker 00

  Is that true?

• 33:41Speaker 02

  So I don't know that she's ever won a big one.

• 33:44Speaker 00

  Wow.

• 33:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 33:46Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 33:46Speaker 02

  Somebody to keep an eye on. Uh, the next nominee is James Franklin. Last year was pretty impressive work. He, but it was also, he couldn't win the small one.

• 33:55Speaker 00

  The medium or the small.

• 33:56Speaker 02

  He couldn't win the regular sized one last year. Uh, and then next nominee is Cristiano Ronaldo.

• 34:03Speaker 00

  Ooh.

• 34:03Speaker 02

  Can't win the big one. He's won zero big ones of the year. And of course the big one would be the World Cup.

• 34:08Speaker 00

  Yeah, Zach, uh, we discussed, cause I think you have a presenter for us for this award and we still have a nominee, but we discussed, I said to you, uh, can you find a presenter for this? And you said, uh, just so we're clear, Ronaldo has won the Champions League and the EPL.

• 34:23Speaker 02

  That's correct.

• 34:24Speaker 00

  And what did, and what did I reply?

• 34:26Speaker 02

  Would you consider that the big one?

• 34:29Speaker 05

  And then I text back and I said, no.

• 34:31Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 34:32Speaker 02

  Not the big one.

• 34:32Speaker 00

  I rest my case.

• 34:33Speaker 02

  It's it's a big one.

• 34:34Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 34:34Speaker 05

  Several big ones.

• 34:35Speaker 00

  It's one of the ones.

• 34:36Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's not it's not the big one.

• 34:38Speaker 00

  The big one.

• 34:39Speaker 05

  There's some fat boys in there, but just not the big one.

• 34:41Speaker 02

  No, it's not the big one. Um, then the last nominee for can't win the big one of the year is Connor McDavid. Connor McDavid might be his last year up in Edmonton. We'll see. I almost feel like this past year, he um, he took a step back in the can't win the big one discussion because he wasn't even in contention to win the big one.

• 34:59Speaker 00

  Yeah, I actually, that's where we came up with this award because I remember we were trying to get Whitney to present it and he he just replied to me, fuck you.

• 35:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:09Speaker 00

  So that's how that award came. So Zach, you have us a presenter. This is our, we have a ton of guest presenters today. You have our first guest presenter for the take.

• 35:17Speaker 05

  I do have our first guest presenter. Yes, sir.

• 35:19Speaker 00

  Okay, give it to us.

• 35:20Speaker 05

  We got it right here.

• 35:21Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 35:23Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 35:24Speaker 05

  Wow.

• 35:25Speaker 07

  Is it? And the winner of the can't win the big one of the year is Ronaldo. I'm the goat.

• 35:39Speaker 00

  That was, that was, that was Messi, you got us?

• 35:42Speaker 05

  I got him. I got us a guy who has won the big one. Messi.

• 35:45Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 35:45Speaker 02

  That's pretty cool. Thank you, Zach.

• 35:46Speaker 00

  Why, why is it Messi in like half speed?

• 35:50Speaker 05

  Messi is a, he just want to take us.

• 35:52Speaker 02

  Well, Spanish isn't his first language.

• 35:53Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah. And how much did it cost on cameo to get Messi?

• 35:57Speaker 05

  Well, Messi's priceless.

• 35:58Speaker 00

  But how much did it cost?

• 36:00Speaker 05

  Top of my head, roughly seventy, seventy-five to one hundred dollars.

• 36:04Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 36:04Speaker 02

  That's a, that's a good deal for Messi.

• 36:05Speaker 00

  Great deal for the goat to do that?

• 36:08Speaker 05

  I mean, look, he, he loves the game. You know, he's got a little bit of love for Ronaldo. They've been compared their entire careers. So he's someone who's won the big one. Ronaldo's still chasing that big one right there. So he lets him know a battery in his back.

• 36:18Speaker 00

  The, the, oh, thirty-nine dollars. Wow. The thing I love about Messi is he's so committed to the game. He never takes his uniform off. That's how we knew it was Messi in that cameo.

• 36:27Speaker 05

  That's how good those bloom, that's that blue striped kid is just phenomenal. I'd never, I wouldn't take it off either, to be honest with you.

• 36:32Speaker 02

  I also like the uh, the, the, the touch to the cheek that he gave.

• 36:35Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 36:36Speaker 02

  That's a, that's a signature move.

• 36:37Speaker 05

  It was soft.

• 36:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 36:38Speaker 00

  Jeff Hornacek.

• 36:39Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's beautiful.

• 36:40Speaker 00

  Yeah. Okay, next up. So congrats to Ronaldo. We'll, we'll have that graphic. Zach, I would like you to tweet that graphic from your personal account tomorrow.

• 36:48Speaker 05

  I can do that.

• 36:49Speaker 00

  Okay. I love that. And LeBron today?

• 36:53Speaker 02

  We got a lot of day left, but the guys are saying, they're saying this is it.

• 36:56Speaker 00

  All right. Uh, the next award is just log off of the year. This is for people who are too online. And the nominees are Kevin Durant. Kevin Durant, I think has been a nominee every single year. Kevin Durant had, of course, his alleged burner, which was get off my Dickerson. Exposed where he was talking shit about his teammates, talking about how uh, he misses Ben Simmons. Cause at least Ben Simmons would pass him the ball, uh, trashing everyone. So just log off, Kevin.

• 37:29Speaker 02

  Kevin said he will never log off.

• 37:30Speaker 00

  He will never log off. We also have Freddie LA seven, the viral German fan who did log off. And then came back on Twitter. So he logged off, he deactivated. And then he came back and was like, you guys were all being mean to me, but I'm gonna just keep doing my trip and I might be a psyop.

• 37:49Speaker 02

  Yeah. I mean,

• 37:50Speaker 00

  He didn't say that part.

• 37:51Speaker 02

  When, when you do log off and then you get drawn back within, you know, a couple of calendar weeks. That is the number one sign that you should in fact, log off.

• 37:58Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 37:59Speaker 02

  Permanently.

• 37:59Speaker 00

  I'd agree. We have uh, pseudo-scientists. I don't know. I don't know what I would, guy who's trying to live forever. Brian Johnson.

• 38:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 38:08Speaker 00

  From the guy who, who brought you uh, the tweet nighttime erection data from my 19 year old son and me. His duration is two minutes longer than mine. Uh, talking about tracking his son's boners. This year he gave us this. Just gave Kate, his girlfriend, oral sex. Good night, everyone. And then followed up with, this is her vaginal microbiome report. 100 out of 100 score. Top 1% of all vaginas.

• 38:37Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 38:38Speaker 00

  Her sample is dominated by the single most protective bacterial species a vagina can host. Only about 25 to 30% of reproductive age women globally are L. Crispoddis dominant.

• 38:50Speaker 02

  That's the number, that's the top vagina?

• 38:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 38:52Speaker 02

  That's the goat? That's what, that's what you shoot for?

• 38:54Speaker 00

  Top 1, 1% of all vaginas. Didn't need to know that. Uh, we also have Jalen Brown for going on Twitch after every single game. And then saying things like, honestly, this was my favorite year of my career and uh, talking about the refs. And just being maybe too online.

• 39:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, agreed.

• 39:14Speaker 00

  Yeah, two online. And then finally, we have our good friend Sean McVay for his thirst trap picture with like 16 abs.

• 39:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 39:23Speaker 00

  Think he got fake abs.

• 39:24Speaker 02

  We, we get it. We get it, Sean.

• 39:26Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's a little too many.

• 39:27Speaker 02

  It's too, that's too many for a football coach.

• 39:30Speaker 00

  You're a genius. You've got a beautiful wife. You've got a hundreds of millions of dollars.

• 39:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 39:35Speaker 00

  And you also got the abs.

• 39:36Speaker 02

  Yeah, football coaches spend more time in the film room.

• 39:39Speaker 00

  It's more of a just.

• 39:40Speaker 02

  Less time in the weight room.

• 39:41Speaker 00

  It's more of a just log off for us. Like, we don't want to see that.

• 39:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, don't need that.

• 39:44Speaker 00

  Yeah. Uh, okay. The winner of the just log off of the year, we gotta get you a drum set next year, Hank.

• 39:51Speaker 00

  Is Brian Johnson.

• 39:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 39:52Speaker 00

  For his girlfriend having a top 1% vagina, which we only know about because Brian Johnson told us.

• 39:59Speaker 02

  He told us all. And then, uh, then unfortunately he got sick.

• 40:02Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:02Speaker 02

  The one thing that he was really, really hoping to not ever do.

• 40:05Speaker 00

  Mm hmm.

• 40:06Speaker 02

  So, hope you're okay, Brian.

• 40:07Speaker 00

  Yeah, okay. Just log off of the year.

• 40:10Speaker 02

  Just log off.

• 40:13Speaker 02

  The next category is the 14th best quarterback of the year award.

• 40:16Speaker 00

  Ooh, one of my favorites.

• 40:17Speaker 02

  This is a good award. This is a good award. Who knows who it could be? Cause there's a lot of really good nominees for it that you hear their names. You think, yeah, that, that sounds like the 14th best quarterback in the NFL. Uh, the first nominee for 14th best quarterback in the NFL is Dak Prescott.

• 40:32Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 40:33Speaker 02

  And last year, I believe he won 16th best quarterback.

• 40:35Speaker 00

  Yes, maybe 17.

• 40:37Speaker 02

  It could have been 17th.

• 40:38Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:39Speaker 02

  Uh, the next nominee is Jordan Love.

• 40:41Speaker 00

  Ah.

• 40:42Speaker 02

  For 14th best quarterback in the NFL. That kind of feels like the right spot for him.

• 40:47Speaker 02

  The next nominee is Aaron Rodgers.

• 40:49Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 40:49Speaker 02

  14th best quarterback.

• 40:51Speaker 00

  He could be the 14th best quarterback.

• 40:52Speaker 02

  He might be. I think if all goes well.

• 40:53Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:55Speaker 02

  The next nominee for 14th best quarterback in the NFL is CJ Stroud.

• 40:59Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 40:59Speaker 02

  Stroud boys, 14th best, have the muddy fallen. It's all right, little bro. You got a long future in this league. Next nominee is Bryce Young. How about that? This is actually, I would imagine that if you're a Bryce Young fan, the honor of having him nominated for 14th best quarterback in the NFL.

• 41:16Speaker 00

  Huge.

• 41:16Speaker 02

  You might as well be putting. Number one on the graphic.

• 41:18Speaker 00

  Bryce Young is now officially from here on forward in the conversation for 14th best quarterback in the league.

• 41:24Speaker 02

  And the final nominee for 14th best quarterback in the NFL is Jacoby Brissette.

• 41:29Speaker 00

  Is he still gonna play this year?

• 41:31Speaker 02

  We'll see. The holdout continues. I don't think there's been any motion on it. The Cardinals, you gotta pay Jacoby.

• 41:36Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 41:36Speaker 02

  You gotta step up.

• 41:37Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 41:38Speaker 02

  You gotta pay him. I don't know. He, I, there's probably a bunch of other teams that probably want him to be a starting quarterback, probably.

• 41:44Speaker 00

  I'd agree. I'd agree.

• 41:45Speaker 02

  Uh, the winner of the 14th best quarterback of the year award.

• 41:50Speaker 02

  Max. You have a cameo for us, Max.

• 41:54Speaker 07

  Hey, hello, everybody. Hey, it's Coach here.

• 41:58Speaker 04

  Wow.

• 41:58Speaker 07

  I'm excited to announce the winner for the 14th best quarterback of the year. And the winner is Dak Prescott.

• 42:09Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 42:09Speaker 07

  Congratulations, Dak, with that, times yours.

• 42:13Speaker 02

  Oh, my God. That's incredible. This guy, I mean, you talk about a, a money-making scheme for all seasons. This guy just, he transfers straight into mall Santa.

• 42:22Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 42:23Speaker 02

  He's doing, and he, his Andy Reid impression is literally mall Santa.

• 42:26Speaker 00

  I'm starting to realize, too, that the takeys probably account for like 75% of the impersonators on Cameos yearly budget. Like, they're like, alright, well, the takeys are coming, so we'll be able to afford rent this month.

• 42:38Speaker 04

  Andy Reid impersonator is probably making bread on.

• 42:40Speaker 00

  You think so?

• 42:41Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah.

• 42:42Speaker 05

  And Messi?

• 42:43Speaker 04

  For sure. Yeah, but I think both of them are doing well.

• 42:47Speaker 02

  Like, how well? It sounds like you think that they're rich.

• 42:51Speaker 00

  They might be.

• 42:51Speaker 04

  They're cameo-rich?

• 42:53Speaker 05

  Every dad and grandpa who's a Chiefs fan, grandson's like, we gotta get a Mandy Reid.

• 42:58Speaker 00

  Zach, can you do any impersonations?

• 43:00Speaker 05

  I, I don't, impersonation is like really a, a low light of anything. I can't do impersonation.

• 43:04Speaker 00

  None.

• 43:04Speaker 05

  Unfortunately, no.

• 43:05Speaker 00

  I would like you to work on an impersonation and then become a cameo impersonator.

• 43:10Speaker 05

  Open-ended?

• 43:11Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 43:11Speaker 04

  Well, you gotta look like the person.

• 43:12Speaker 00

  Well, yeah. Who does he look like?

• 43:14Speaker 04

  That guy, that guy who eats food.

• 43:16Speaker 00

  Yeah, do the guy, or do Nick Trani.

• 43:18Speaker 04

  Or Nick, or Nick.

• 43:20Speaker 00

  Okay, I can look into it.

• 43:21Speaker 05

  What about the guy who eats everything in two bites?

• 43:23Speaker 00

  Zach doing that.

• 43:24Speaker 05

  Unimpersonate, unimpersonatable. He is a, he's a special guy.

• 43:27Speaker 00

  I get.

• 43:27Speaker 05

  He has a gift. You can't recreate that.

• 43:29Speaker 00

  You should do Nick Barstool's Nick from KB and Nick impersonator.

• 43:36Speaker 05

  That would be strong.

• 43:37Speaker 00

  That'd be sick. Yeah, maybe the guy who eats the food. That'd be cool. You should eat the food.

• 43:42Speaker 05

  Someone DM, DMs me that guy once a week being like, did you know that Zach had?

• 43:47Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 43:47Speaker 05

  A secret account.

• 43:48Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 43:48Speaker 05

  I get the guy 15 times a day.

• 43:50Speaker 00

  I love it.

• 43:51Speaker 05

  It's always like he's the first guy who found him.

• 43:52Speaker 00

  I love it. Alright, so congrats, congrats to Dak. Huge award.

• 43:57Speaker 02

  Massive, massive.

• 43:58Speaker 00

  14th best quarterback. Alright, next up, this is a new award. It's the Brad Stevens No of the Year. Brad Stevens No of the Year. Uh, first up is Brad Stevens saying no to UNC.

• 44:14Speaker 00

  Good no.

• 44:14Speaker 02

  Gotta make him say no.

• 44:15Speaker 00

  Strong no. Uh, then we have Michigan. Brad Stevens, gotta make him say no there.

• 44:22Speaker 02

  Turn him down.

• 44:22Speaker 00

  Said no. Then we have the Paul George trade. Uh, Paul George, Jalen Brown, which.

• 44:29Speaker 02

  They thought to themselves, like, we should make Brad Stevens say no.

• 44:32Speaker 00

  Right.

• 44:33Speaker 02

  But he didn't.

• 44:33Speaker 00

  He didn't say no.

• 44:34Speaker 02

  He said yes.

• 44:35Speaker 00

  Yeah. And finally, the Mavericks, uh, opening, job opening that Dusty May ended up getting, but Brad Stevens had to say no to that.

• 44:42Speaker 02

  He said no to it first, yeah.

• 44:43Speaker 00

  Yeah. Okay, we have, uh, Hank, you got us a cameo for this?

• 44:46Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 44:47Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 44:48Speaker 03

  It's a real one.

• 44:49Speaker 00

  Yeah. No, this is impersonator. These are all real.

• 44:53Speaker 07

  Here we go. 2026 takeys. First and foremost, to Dan, to PMT, to the entire crew. You guys are the best. What a year for Pardon My Take. Alright. The winner of the 2026 taking for Brad Stevens No of the Year is?

• 45:20Speaker 07

  Paul George.

• 45:22Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 45:24Speaker 07

  PG, congratulations. You're the winner of the takey for Brad Stevens, no of the year.

• 45:30Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 45:31Speaker 03

  I respect the committee, so I still had him do that one, but I, I, I wanted to change it to, it should have been Yanis.

• 45:38Speaker 02

  Why?

• 45:39Speaker 03

  Cause he said no to Yanis.

• 45:41Speaker 02

  Hugo, cause of Hugo?

• 45:42Speaker 03

  Yeah. He didn't say no to Paul George.

• 45:44Speaker 02

  No, but that's why.

• 45:44Speaker 00

  No, he should have.

• 45:45Speaker 02

  But that's why you make him say no.

• 45:46Speaker 00

  You didn't make him say no. They just asked him, are you down for this?

• 45:51Speaker 03

  Which means it was a smart move.

• 45:52Speaker 02

  So really this award goes to the Sixers.

• 45:55Speaker 00

  Yeah, they, they, they realized to not, don't even make him say no, just say we're gonna do it.

• 46:00Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 46:01Speaker 00

  Yeah. So yeah, we might've confused this award around a little bit, but I think maybe the Sixers won this?

• 46:05Speaker 02

  I think the Sixers win this award.

• 46:07Speaker 00

  Sixers win this award.

• 46:08Speaker 02

  Because you had to make Brad Stevens say no to the trade. Yeah.

• 46:10Speaker 04

  All except on behalf, thank you.

• 46:12Speaker 00

  And he didn't.

• 46:13Speaker 02

  And he didn't say no.

• 46:13Speaker 00

  He didn't say no.

• 46:14Speaker 02

  And that's why you gotta make him say no, cause sometimes he won't.

• 46:16Speaker 00

  Yeah. Okay. Before we get to our next one, can we get our guests for the next one? Should we have them come in now?

• 46:23Speaker 02

  Yeah, let's have them come in now.

• 46:23Speaker 00

  Come in now for the, the, not, the, I, I know this is confusing because they might have the same name, but yeah, the, the in-person guest for the next award. I think they dressed up and they probably want to hear, uh, who the nominees are, who he's up against. Um, before we do that, a quick word from our friends at Twisted Tea. Summer's here and so is the Twisted Tea Summer Party Pack. Twisted Tea is a refreshing hard iced tea made with real brewed tea and 5% alcohol. They also have a new summer party pack. Has a brand new twisted lemonade. It's a refreshing hard lemonade made with real lemons. It's only available in their new party pack. So grab it while you can. Whether you're hanging out at the bar, hitting the lake or the beach for a weekend or day drinking with friends.

• 47:05Speaker 00

  Twisted Tea is there to turn your day up a notch and make a good time, a great time. Keep the good times going all day and all summer long. Keep it twisted. Grab a refreshing twisted tea today. What is our next award, PFT?

• 47:18Speaker 02

  Uh, the next award, big cat, is a favored award of ours.

• 47:24Speaker 02

  It's the lib of the year award.

• 47:25Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 47:25Speaker 02

  The lib of the year and Jersey Jerry has won, I believe, three times in a row.

• 47:30Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 47:31Speaker 02

  He's three-peated, so this is a confirmed dynasty of liberalism for, for Jersey Jerry. And earlier today, I asked Jerry if he would come in for the Takey Awards because I told him we were doing an award for Bush of the year.

• 47:45Speaker 00

  Bush of the year.

• 47:45Speaker 02

  Because his, his, uh, his esports team is Telluride Bush.

• 47:49Speaker 00

  Shout out to Bush.

• 47:50Speaker 02

  Shout out to Bush.

• 47:50Speaker 00

  Support the Bush.

• 47:51Speaker 02

  But wanted Jerry to not know that it was the lib of the year award. So I told him he's nominated for Bush of the year.

• 47:57Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 47:57Speaker 02

  Uh, so Jerry's coming in and we will announce the nominees in just a moment.

• 48:02Speaker 00

  For Bush of the year.

• 48:03Speaker 02

  Well, yeah, I'm gonna tell him that it's not Bush when it comes.

• 48:05Speaker 00

  Oh, breaking news, breaking news. We'll wait for Jerry. Breaking news, breaking news.

• 48:12Speaker 00

  Diego Pavia waved by the Ravens.

• 48:14Speaker 02

  Damn, end of an era. What was your favorite Pavia moment on the, on the Ravens? Mine was that video that they showed where it looked like he was shorter than the center's butt.

• 48:22Speaker 00

  I would agree with you.

• 48:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:23Speaker 00

  That's a tough one to top.

• 48:25Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm. I like that coat.

• 48:26Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 48:31Speaker 02

  Okay, we got Jersey Jerry in here. Uh, Jerry, welcome to the 2026 Takey Awards.

• 48:37Speaker 00

  How you doing? Incredible hat, Jerry. Thank you so much. Does it, now are you a little nervous because people are gonna say, hey, this doesn't feel like it's on the up and up. We're giving out Bush of the year and you're wearing a Bush gaming hat? No, I'm not worried. Okay. I'm not worried.

• 48:51Speaker 02

  All right.

• 48:51Speaker 00

  All right.

• 48:51Speaker 02

  Bush of the year, it could be anybody. Mims, can you just pan down to get the full Jerry outfit in the shot? I just want people to see the whole outfit that he's wearing.

• 48:59Speaker 00

  What does that say? Bush Records.

• 49:02Speaker 02

  I like that. And you got the.

• 49:03Speaker 00

  Wait, what does it say?

• 49:03Speaker 04

  Telluride Bush.

• 49:04Speaker 00

  Oh, Telluride Bush.

• 49:05Speaker 03

  You don't take the stickers off the hat?

• 49:07Speaker 04

  No. In New Jersey, like, they kinda keep it on.

• 49:10Speaker 02

  I like that jacket. It's, uh, blue no matter who. That's Jerry.

• 49:12Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's nice, right? Turquoise.

• 49:14Speaker 00

  In New Jersey, they keep it on?

• 49:15Speaker 04

  Yeah. I guess East Coast maybe. I mean, New York too.

• 49:18Speaker 02

  This has been a big year.

• 49:19Speaker 04

  They make fun of me for that.

• 49:20Speaker 00

  Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. We keep the stickers on.

• 49:23Speaker 02

  It's been a big, a big year for Bush.

• 49:26Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 49:27Speaker 02

  Bush might be back.

• 49:28Speaker 04

  But I think. Bush is back.

• 49:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, but Jerry, I got a confession. You're not nominated for Bush of the Year. It's the lib of the year award again. I just wanted to trick you to get you in here, but you did tell me earlier that you kind of missed the lib of the year. Like you take a little bit of pride in it.

• 49:42Speaker 04

  I figured that was gonna happen. You did lie to me.

• 49:45Speaker 02

  I did lie to you, so.

• 49:46Speaker 00

  Yeah, we might have lied to you a little.

• 49:47Speaker 04

  I really, I mean, that's why I had the undershirt on.

• 49:49Speaker 02

  There you go.

• 49:50Speaker 04

  You know?

• 49:50Speaker 00

  Why?

• 49:51Speaker 04

  Well, because he told me I was gonna get a push of the year. So I was like, oh, okay, cool. Let me get that hat out, the undershirt. And we're here again.

• 49:59Speaker 02

  So you're nominated for for lib of the year. This would be four times in a row for you.

• 50:02Speaker 00

  Who could have seen it coming?

• 50:03Speaker 04

  No, this will be three.

• 50:04Speaker 02

  Oh, I'm sorry. Three times.

• 50:05Speaker 04

  Yeah, this is a back to back to back.

• 50:06Speaker 02

  Okay, so this this would be for a dynasty.

• 50:08Speaker 04

  Well, nominated. I didn't win.

• 50:09Speaker 02

  Yeah, if you won, it would be for a dynasty.

• 50:11Speaker 04

  Okay, okay.

• 50:12Speaker 02

  Uh, the nominee is because you're up against a tough crowd. The nominee is Kawhi Leonard. He's been nominated for a lib of the year for his service planting trees.

• 50:19Speaker 00

  He's a tree planter.

• 50:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, you know, he's like trying to be the the Green New Deal, one man Green New Deal.

• 50:25Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 50:26Speaker 02

  Um, then yourself, you were nominated.

• 50:29Speaker 04

  Can I can I say something real quick? Why? Why was I nominated again?

• 50:32Speaker 02

  Oh, so I mean, you've become more accepting of various lifestyles this year, I think. You know, learning more about, uh, you got a cousin that maybe he's gay, maybe he's bi, maybe he's straight and whatever that you've learned about like how you can go back and forth and you've expanded your mind. You're like, oh, maybe that could be you one day.

• 50:48Speaker 00

  Jerry, can I just, I I'll answer your question with your own words.

• 50:52Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 50:52Speaker 00

  This is a direct quote from Jersey Jerry, uh, June 15th, 8:11 PM. There's no way I can just turn gay. So how did that happen? Congratulations. You're accepting of it.

• 51:03Speaker 04

  You're missing the context there.

• 51:06Speaker 00

  You tweeted that. I'm reading that right here.

• 51:08Speaker 04

  There was context.

• 51:09Speaker 02

  You were saying that you were born that way.

• 51:11Speaker 04

  I was not born that way. No.

• 51:12Speaker 02

  You just said there's no way that you can just turn. So you were born.

• 51:15Speaker 00

  Very accepting.

• 51:16Speaker 02

  You and Lady Gaga, born that way.

• 51:18Speaker 04

  No, no.

• 51:19Speaker 00

  Beautiful, Jerry. Beautiful.

• 51:20Speaker 03

  You were running with Harry Sisson. Was that last year?

• 51:22Speaker 04

  No, that was, uh, that was last year.

• 51:24Speaker 02

  Yeah, it was last year.

• 51:25Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 51:25Speaker 02

  But still a pretty impressive.

• 51:26Speaker 04

  Well, have you seen this? I mean, people are making this big thing about the search history. That doesn't seem very lib, does it?

• 51:32Speaker 00

  Hmm?

• 51:32Speaker 02

  I know what you're talking about.

• 51:34Speaker 00

  Yeah, Jerry did have a, a screen. Do you, do you know what we're talking about?

• 51:37Speaker 04

  I do know, yeah.

• 51:38Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah. Screen grab of his search history. Uh, do you, do you have it?

• 51:43Speaker 04

  I, I don't have, I don't have.

• 51:44Speaker 00

  Can you pull it up and, and, and just read us what Jerry was searching?

• 51:48Speaker 03

  Buffet Las Vegas.

• 51:49Speaker 00

  This is Jerry's Google search that he accidentally had.

• 51:53Speaker 03

  Covid China. Hantavirus. None of these things are non-lib. Las Vegas food.

• 51:59Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 51:59Speaker 03

  Charlie Kirk microphone gun. That's kind of like, you might have been. Might have been looking for it like to.

• 52:05Speaker 00

  Yeah. That's some, that's. What'd you find on that one?

• 52:08Speaker 04

  Not much.

• 52:09Speaker 02

  Yeah. Are you deep into the Candace Owens lore?

• 52:11Speaker 04

  No, not.

• 52:12Speaker 03

  Las Vegas. Who killed Steve Job?

• 52:17Speaker 03

  MK Ultra.

• 52:18Speaker 02

  Who killed Steve Job?

• 52:20Speaker 04

  I don't know. I, I don't want to say the wrong thing. Allegedly, there's stories out there.

• 52:24Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 52:24Speaker 04

  Well, there is stories out there, but.

• 52:26Speaker 00

  Could the answer be cancer?

• 52:27Speaker 04

  Yes, but the, the, that, that is, that actually is the answer.

• 52:30Speaker 03

  Not take medicine?

• 52:31Speaker 04

  But there's a, there's a reason for all that. They didn't, they didn't, apparently, allegedly, from what I've read, they didn't, they forced him to not take the medicine.

• 52:39Speaker 00

  Ah, okay.

• 52:40Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 52:40Speaker 03

  MK Ultra.

• 52:42Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 52:42Speaker 03

  P D D Israel.

• 52:44Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 52:44Speaker 03

  Okay. Who was part of the elite group? I mean, none of those are not.

• 52:48Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 52:48Speaker 02

  Yeah. So again, I mean, kind of strengthening the case a little bit.

• 52:51Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 52:52Speaker 02

  Uh, and the other nominee, uh, Jerry O'Connell. We got two Jerries nominated this year.

• 52:56Speaker 04

  Well, he was last year too, no?

• 52:58Speaker 02

  Yeah. This year Jerry appeared on the, uh, Bill Maher podcast and proceeded to live out for about, I don't know, 90 minutes of just solid lib-ness.

• 53:05Speaker 00

  Yeah, I think he was on the, wasn't he at a, a Kamala?

• 53:09Speaker 04

  He was, he was at the rally.

• 53:10Speaker 02

  He's a, he's a white dude for Kamala.

• 53:11Speaker 00

  Yep, white dude for Kamala.

• 53:12Speaker 04

  Well, he's got daughters, right? He's got daughters.

• 53:13Speaker 02

  Yeah, he's got daughters.

• 53:14Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 53:14Speaker 00

  Uh, that doesn't make someone.

• 53:16Speaker 02

  Well, no, Jerry's got a daughter.

• 53:17Speaker 00

  Yeah, Jerry. Oh, you do have a daughter.

• 53:20Speaker 04

  I do.

• 53:20Speaker 00

  And you might have another daughter on the way.

• 53:22Speaker 04

  I, I might be outnumbered, yeah.

• 53:24Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 53:24Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 53:25Speaker 00

  Jerry made a mistake the other night.

• 53:26Speaker 04

  Yeah, that was a mistake.

• 53:27Speaker 02

  What'd you do?

• 53:29Speaker 04

  I re- I released on ovulation.

• 53:31Speaker 02

  Oh, you didn't pull out?

• 53:32Speaker 04

  Yeah, I didn't pull out. I kept it in.

• 53:33Speaker 02

  Okay. And it felt like a chick?

• 53:36Speaker 04

  Yeah, cause it was bad.

• 53:37Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 53:39Speaker 02

  All right, and then the last nominee for lib of the year is Max.

• 53:43Speaker 00

  Wow.

• 53:43Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 53:45Speaker 00

  Wow.

• 53:46Speaker 02

  What is Max?

• 53:46Speaker 04

  What was that for? Yeah.

• 53:47Speaker 02

  Oh, what was it? Why was Max nominated?

• 53:49Speaker 00

  I don't know. Well, you're nominated. Congrats.

• 53:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, congrats, Max.

• 53:52Speaker 04

  All right. I'm just happy to be in the conversation.

• 53:54Speaker 02

  There you go.

• 53:54Speaker 04

  Good luck, Jerry.

• 53:55Speaker 02

  Love that. Thanks. You too.

• 53:56Speaker 04

  May the best lib win.

• 53:57Speaker 02

  Uh, so Jerry, last year we had Mayor Pete present you with an award. Yeah. Um, this year we have a very, very special guest presenter for you. Um, can we pull it up?

• 54:11Speaker 02

  Fanta? It is, uh, it's Hunter Biden. Hunter Biden has an award.

• 54:15Speaker 04

  From, uh, one brother in recovery to another, congratulations on the live of the year award. I know you didn't have much competition, but I'm still proud of you. We're both proud of you. Hey, Jerry, congratulations, man. And keep the faith. What the fuck?

• 54:32Speaker 02

  I was not expecting that. Uh, Joe Biden wanted to wish you a happy live of the year.

• 54:36Speaker 00

  That's President Joe Biden, Jerry. President Joe Biden just threw, just gave an award on the takeys. To you.

• 54:42Speaker 04

  Serious?

• 54:43Speaker 02

  What are we doing?

• 54:45Speaker 00

  You won. You won. Congrats.

• 54:49Speaker 02

  You're a president. That's crazy. I will say, can I say?

• 54:52Speaker 00

  They only made 47 of those.

• 54:55Speaker 02

  It's starting to hit me now. Let it hit me for a second. It didn't hit me yet. I mean, that's kind of respect there.

• 55:00Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 55:01Speaker 02

  That's big time. Yeah. All right, sleepy Joe. Thank you, brother. You want to hear it again?

• 55:06Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 55:06Speaker 02

  One more time. Run it back, run it back. Does he say Jerry?

• 55:08Speaker 04

  Hey, Jerry, from, uh, one brother in recovery to another, congratulations on the live of the year award. I know you didn't have much competition, but I'm still proud of you. We're both proud of you.

• 55:20Speaker 02

  Hey, Jerry, congratulations.

• 55:23Speaker 02

  Keep the faith, Jerry. Congratulations, dude. How about that?

• 55:28Speaker 00

  Forty-five men have served in forty-seven presidencies.

• 55:30Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 55:31Speaker 00

  You have, you have one of forty-five men.

• 55:33Speaker 02

  That's pretty crazy.

• 55:34Speaker 00

  Who've served as President of the United States of America, giving you a takey for lib of the year. Just let that set in for a second. That's history.

• 55:41Speaker 02

  That is history right there.

• 55:43Speaker 00

  It's incredible.

• 55:43Speaker 02

  Can we get memes?

• 55:44Speaker 04

  If you get in trouble at the invitational, now you got, now you got.

• 55:46Speaker 00

  Yeah, 100%. Yeah, yeah.

• 55:48Speaker 02

  The president knows where I am. Yeah, I was just on the phone with the president. The Tiger Woods. Yeah, just on the phone with the president. Uh, memes, can you do a Photoshop of Biden putting the presidential medal onto Jerry's neck? Can we do that?

• 56:03Speaker 03

  No, he's

• 56:03Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, can you stand up for that real quick? Just for the meme.

• 56:07Speaker 06

  Sure.

• 56:07Speaker 03

  We're at memes right here.

• 56:09Speaker 02

  Tell them where to stand memes. So the meme's just right.

• 56:11Speaker 06

  Uh, do, go to the center of the rug.

• 56:18Speaker 02

  This is a great moment in patriotism.

• 56:21Speaker 06

  Have him move to his right.

• 56:22Speaker 03

  Move to your right.

• 56:23Speaker 02

  To your right, Jerry.

• 56:24Speaker 06

  Keep going.

• 56:25Speaker 03

  Keep going.

• 56:26Speaker 06

  Mm-hmm. Now turn.

• 56:28Speaker 03

  Now turn.

• 56:28Speaker 00

  This is the first time Jerry's moved to his right. All year. There you go.

• 56:34Speaker 06

  Turn a little to the left.

• 56:35Speaker 03

  Turn a little to the left.

• 56:36Speaker 00

  You could do this.

• 56:39Speaker 06

  Look that way.

• 56:41Speaker 06

  You didn't have to turn.

• 56:42Speaker 02

  Is he good now memes?

• 56:43Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 56:43Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 56:44Speaker 06

  Do you have him, have him do a spin?

• 56:45Speaker 02

  Do a spin, do a twirl. One, one full twirl.

• 56:48Speaker 00

  One little twirl. Okay.

• 56:51Speaker 02

  Okay, got it?

• 56:52Speaker 06

  Got it.

• 56:52Speaker 02

  All right. Jerry, we logged it.

• 56:54Speaker 00

  A president of the United States knows who you are, and he knows that you're the liberal of the year.

• 57:01Speaker 06

  Listen, man, I mean. Trump's never done that.

• 57:06Speaker 06

  So I'm gonna say to that one.

• 57:07Speaker 02

  It's true.

• 57:08Speaker 06

  Trump's never done that.

• 57:09Speaker 02

  Yet.

• 57:10Speaker 06

  Yet.

• 57:11Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 57:12Speaker 06

  But I never see myself winning Republican of the Year. I don't see that.

• 57:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, but there's only one way we could go for Live the Year presenter next year.

• 57:18Speaker 00

  Trump calling you a liberal would kill you.

• 57:20Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 57:20Speaker 06

  Yeah, bury me.

• 57:23Speaker 06

  You can't beat that though, so it's gotta be it. Back, back, back.

• 57:26Speaker 00

  I did a jump, I, PFT showed it to me earlier today. I was just like, what?

• 57:30Speaker 02

  I did a jump scare too. I didn't know that, I didn't know that the big guy was gonna be there at the end.

• 57:33Speaker 00

  Play it one more time. Play it one more time, boys. One more time.

• 57:38Speaker 03

  Hey Jerry, from, uh, one brother in recovery to another, congratulations on the Live of the Year Award. I know you didn't have much competition, but I'm still proud of you. We're both proud of you.

• 57:50Speaker 00

  Hey Jerry, congratulations, dude. Keep the faith.

• 57:54Speaker 02

  Love that. Love that.

• 57:56Speaker 00

  By the way, he looks, he looks not a day older than a fifth.

• 57:59Speaker 06

  Hasn't lost a step.

• 58:00Speaker 02

  Locked in.

• 58:03Speaker 00

  Sharp as can be.

• 58:04Speaker 02

  Well, congrats Jerry.

• 58:05Speaker 06

  Jerry, thank you guys again for the opportunity.

• 58:07Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 58:08Speaker 06

  I mean, I think a first ever back to back to back or no?

• 58:10Speaker 00

  Yeah. Yeah.

• 58:12Speaker 06

  Well, yeah, I mean, I mean, that's pretty crazy.

• 58:14Speaker 00

  So congratulations.

• 58:15Speaker 06

  Thank you, guys. I appreciate that.

• 58:16Speaker 02

  And that's the FDR.

• 58:17Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 58:18Speaker 02

  That's what they'll call that.

• 58:18Speaker 06

  Exactly. Yeah. So I appreciate that, boys. Uh, where would honor?

• 58:22Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 58:22Speaker 06

  Uh, cash prize never got it last year.

• 58:24Speaker 00

  Uh, well, it'll be in the mail.

• 58:26Speaker 06

  All right.

• 58:26Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 58:26Speaker 06

  So double this year.

• 58:28Speaker 00

  Uh, yeah.

• 58:28Speaker 02

  Yeah, we'll double.

• 58:29Speaker 00

  Yeah. Well, inflation.

• 58:30Speaker 02

  Taxes.

• 58:30Speaker 00

  Yeah, taxes and inflation.

• 58:31Speaker 06

  It's a 40 spot this year.

• 58:33Speaker 02

  It's 90% tax.

• 58:34Speaker 06

  Mm hmm.

• 58:35Speaker 00

  But we got your cash prize.

• 58:36Speaker 02

  You understand.

• 58:37Speaker 00

  We're proud, okay? Maybe we'll, we'll get you a bumper sticker for it. Yeah.

• 58:41Speaker 02

  We will. We'll get that made up for him.

• 58:44Speaker 00

  Um, all right. Great award. Next up, uh, we're gonna kind of stay in the same, same zone here. We have the first ever, uh, cuck of the year.

• 58:54Speaker 02

  Ooh.

• 58:54Speaker 00

  Cuck of the year. And the nominees for cuck of the year are, I don't know who this first person is, Jo- Josh Hayman? Who's that?

• 59:03Speaker 02

  Josh Hayman.

• 59:04Speaker 00

  Oh, why'd we put that on there?

• 59:05Speaker 02

  That was, uh, the, uh, John Hayman.

• 59:08Speaker 00

  John Hayman.

• 59:08Speaker 02

  John Hayman is the guy, because he said, I don't know why everyone online keeps calling me a Yankee cuck.

• 59:13Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah.

• 59:14Speaker 02

  Reporter said that two days ago.

• 59:15Speaker 00

  That's a good way to, to, to, to be called a cuck. Uh, all right, we have also, uh, the Wisconsin chancellor, because, uh, I, on this program, called her an anti-football pussy. She then, uh, decided to quit her job at Wisconsin and join an Ivy League school.

• 59:34Speaker 02

  Mm hmm.

• 59:34Speaker 00

  So turned out to be right.

• 59:36Speaker 02

  Nailed it.

• 59:37Speaker 00

  Turned out to be right. Uh, we also have our good friend, uh, Jerry O'Connell is nominated for cuck of the year. For the time he went on Bill Maher's podcast and said that his daughters and his wife beat him up for being like, hey, you know, like even just saying something that wasn't fully.

• 59:54Speaker 02

  Even like thinking about Donald Trump.

• 59:55Speaker 00

  Yeah, right.

• 59:56Speaker 02

  They would hit him.

• 59:56Speaker 00

  Yeah. Are you thinking about Trump right now?

• 59:58Speaker 02

  Crime is what it was.

• 59:59Speaker 00

  Slapped him across.

• 1:00:00Speaker 02

  And then everyone online called him a fucking cuck.

• 1:00:02Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's an absolute fucking cuck. Uh, we have Nikki Glaser. Why is Nikki Glaser on there?

• 1:00:07Speaker 02

  Nikki Glaser, I believe she told a story about, uh.

• 1:00:10Speaker 03

  She wanted her boyfriend to go out and.

• 1:00:12Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 1:00:13Speaker 03

  Hook up with girls.

• 1:00:13Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah. That's, that's cuck behavior.

• 1:00:15Speaker 02

  That's also respect.

• 1:00:16Speaker 00

  Yeah. And then the Coldplay, uh, concert, uh, CEO. So that, remember that happened? That was like.

• 1:00:23Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:00:23Speaker 00

  That was a long time ago.

• 1:00:24Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:00:25Speaker 00

  But it wasn't. It was like a year ago.

• 1:00:26Speaker 02

  Exactly.

• 1:00:27Speaker 00

  All right. The winner for cuck of the year in the 2026 Takey Awards is Mr. Jerry O'Connell. Wow. And would you know it, we have Jerry here live to accept his award. Jerry, you have just won, I don't know if you heard us, but you won take of the Takey of the year for cuck of the year. Uh, for the time that you told the story about how your twin daughters and your wife slap you around a little bit.

• 1:00:58Speaker 05

  Um, yeah, kind of exciting to have two years in a row, uh, of being a Takey winner. That's, that's pretty exciting. Um, I, I don't accept this Takey, guys. I, uh,

• 1:01:12Speaker 00

  What a cuck move.

• 1:01:13Speaker 05

  I can't accept it.

• 1:01:13Speaker 02

  You're gonna let another man come up and take your award, Jerry?

• 1:01:17Speaker 00

  You wanna watch another man take your award?

• 1:01:19Speaker 02

  Uh, that, you know what? Give him two awards now, cause he just won again.

• 1:01:23Speaker 00

  Oh, that's interesting, Jerry. Two awards.

• 1:01:26Speaker 02

  We got trophies, Jerry.

• 1:01:27Speaker 00

  We got trophies for you. We got two of them. It's a man sitting in a cuck chair just for you. So we're gonna send that to you.

• 1:01:34Speaker 02

  I think it's you, actually.

• 1:01:35Speaker 00

  It is you. It's you. We made you sitting in a cuck chair as a trophy.

• 1:01:42Speaker 02

  Jerry, what is it? What is it like being such a fucking cuck?

• 1:01:49Speaker 05

  Hey guys, do you remember when I first came on your podcast to address, uh, the Vrabel Racini issue? And I implored people to stop calling me an F word cuck.

• 1:02:00Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:02:00Speaker 05

  But, uh, you're now the, the, the, the exclusive exhibitor of your podcast, Netflix, actually wrote the actual F word out in the closed captioning.

• 1:02:11Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:02:11Speaker 05

  So, uh, on behalf of the closed captioning person at Netflix, I want to apologize to anyone who may have been offended by Pardon My Takes, closed captioning choice.

• 1:02:23Speaker 07

  Is.

• 1:02:25Speaker 00

  Um.

• 1:02:26Speaker 02

  That's such a cock thing to do.

• 1:02:27Speaker 00

  Yeah, so you've come on, you've come on, just so we can recap, you've come on, you've not accepted the award and you've apologized.

• 1:02:32Speaker 07

  No.

• 1:02:33Speaker 00

  Just proving it.

• 1:02:33Speaker 07

  I don't want the award, it's an honor to be, it's an honor to get a takey. Uh, I do want to apologize to my wife and children for saying anything about them in the past. Uh, I love them very much, they should speak for themselves, uh, when it comes to matters about them. I would only like to talk about what projects I'm working on and, and so on and so forth. Uh, my main focus right now is fantasy football.

• 1:02:57Speaker 00

  Mm hmm, yeah.

• 1:02:58Speaker 07

  I'm not even kidding, I'm in so many mock drafts all the time. I'm really just concentrating on managing your team. And it's a really tough season, so much has happened, so many players are in so many different places. David Montgomery is a Texan. Um, you know, uh, we got a running back situation in the AFC East, um.

• 1:03:22Speaker 00

  We do.

• 1:03:23Speaker 07

  I'm just everywhere, you know, like, how good is George Pickens gonna be, like?

• 1:03:27Speaker 00

  Yeah, lock in, Jerry, I love this.

• 1:03:31Speaker 07

  Yeah, I just don't know, it's really, right now, I'm really just trying to lock in, I'm really just trying to lock in. I'm actually, uh, it's, uh, it, it's exhausting running our fantasy team because expectations could not be higher this season. I also want to apologize, I, I re, I, I re-watched, uh, the episode where I told Hanky, um, Tubi was a growth engine and stuff because Hanky asked what screens my Tubi movie was gonna be on, uh, what, what movie theater and unlike Odyssey, it was, uh, Tubi is a streaming service. Um, you know, I don't really like look at, I, I try to save battery on my Android, so I don't really have like,

• 1:04:13Speaker 07

  I don't really look at my reflection when I'm on your show, I don't really see what I'm looking like right now.

• 1:04:18Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:04:18Speaker 07

  It was, it was a bad physical look for me, um, screaming that, um, Hanky, uh, uh, saying very, very rude things about Hanky and all, and all that sort of stuff, but the angle was like terrible. It was down here and I was very vascular and I had like bags under my eyes and stuff. It was, uh, it just wasn't a good look.

• 1:04:38Speaker 00

  You were crushing it.

• 1:04:39Speaker 07

  Hank, Hank, I do want to apologize to you for, uh, saying a lot of those things and physically what I would do to you. It's, it's not appropriate, it's not appropriate.

• 1:04:47Speaker 00

  Yeah, that was actually.

• 1:04:49Speaker 03

  So is Tubi not a growth engine?

• 1:04:52Speaker 05

  Sorry?

• 1:04:52Speaker 03

  Is Tubi not a growth engine?

• 1:04:55Speaker 05

  No, Tubi is a growth engine. Um, by the way, somehow the people at Tubi were very pleased with my, uh, my performance on, on part of my take when I was saying it was a growth engine. I had to, I apologized vehemently because

• 1:05:09Speaker 05

  unlike a bar stool, I deal with human resources a lot and just sort of what I was saying about what I was gonna do to Hanky and I was pretty graphic. I was pretty graphic.

• 1:05:17Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah. But in a spin zone here, you actually were going to buttfuck Hank, which is very against your cuck-like tendencies to watch someone else buttfuck Hank, right?

• 1:05:35Speaker 00

  That you're an alpha in that moment. You're an alpha.

• 1:05:38Speaker 02

  I'd say if you, if you were gonna power bottom Hank, then I'd be like, yeah, that makes sense. But if you're, if you're doing the drilling,

• 1:05:45Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:05:46Speaker 02

  then yeah, that's kind of, you know, the committee will take that into consideration next year.

• 1:05:50Speaker 00

  That's badass.

• 1:05:51Speaker 05

  I'm not, I'm not doing any of that. I, I want to apologize to anyone who heard that. And I also don't want to affiliate the people at Tubi with what I was saying I was gonna do to Hank and everything.

• 1:06:03Speaker 02

  Tubi is a, is a girth engine.

• 1:06:07Speaker 05

  Just to switch everything up for a second, um, Hank, uh, little olive branch. I'm really excited about your Patriots this season.

• 1:06:15Speaker 00

  Wow, love that.

• 1:06:15Speaker 05

  They really, they really look good, all of them. I gotta tell you, the biggest question I have, and we'll deal with this when I do, well, actually, let me, guys, is it okay if I start with, with the AFC East?

• 1:06:30Speaker 00

  Hey, do you accept his apology?

• 1:06:33Speaker 05

  Come on, Hank.

• 1:06:34Speaker 03

  Yeah, we'll see what he says at the end of this call. As of right now, yes.

• 1:06:38Speaker 05

  Hank, I'm not gonna say anything. I'm, I'm, I'm not gonna say anything. I'm, I'm, Hank, I'm actually done fighting with you. There's no, there's no beating you. You always say the one thing, you're like an acupuncturist with like rude things to say. You're just like, oh, let's just get this nerve right there. And you just get it right in there.

• 1:06:56Speaker 03

  If I get, if I feel like I'm getting attacked, I'm attacking back every time. So that, that.

• 1:07:01Speaker 05

  Hundred percent. You are a worthy adversary. I, I, I laid down my sword, Hank. I laid down my sword. I need to concentrate on.

• 1:07:08Speaker 00

  True cock fashion.

• 1:07:12Speaker 07

  On people I can, you know, need victory with, you know?

• 1:07:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, yep.

• 1:07:16Speaker 07

  Hey, what happened with Sweet?

• 1:07:19Speaker 00

  All right, Jerry, we'll see ya.

• 1:07:20Speaker 02

  Thanks, Jerry.

• 1:07:20Speaker 00

  Thanks, Jerry. Congrats again.

• 1:07:22Speaker 07

  You could take that cuck trophy and you could shove it up your ass, both you. You could shove it up your ass. And you know what? I am gonna cuck and watch you guys that shoved up your ass. I'm gonna watch Zack and Hanky shoving it up both your butts, just like this. Yeah. Yeah. And then I'm gonna be a growth engine right down there. Yeah, blood flow. Shove it up there. And I will watch. You're right. Maybe I am a cuck. Maybe I will take this award. Yeah, I am a cuck. I wanna watch that. I wanna watch you shove that cuck thing up your ass. I wanna watch it. Yeah. Yeah. Good. I'm glad. You're right. I am a cuck. I am a cuck. Call me a cuck. I'm a cuck. I want to watch Big Cat and PFT get that trophy shoved up their buttholes.

• 1:08:08Speaker 07

  Probably, for sure, it's not the first time something has been up there, so it's gonna slip right in. Yeah. Both your heads are up there all the time.

• 1:08:17Speaker 02

  Thank you, Jerry. All right, Jerry, information about Jerry's charity, check out Seven Sunday Heroes Foundation.

• 1:08:23Speaker 07

  By the way, let me, I thought for sure when you said I was winning a takey, I thought it was gonna be something along the lines of best impersonation of, uh, Geno Smith, which somehow still have not been canceled for that. But let me tell you something. If I ever run for city council here in Calabasas, for sure that video is coming up.

• 1:08:41Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:08:44Speaker 07

  Oh, Jaden Daniels came up in one of my mock drafts yesterday.

• 1:08:47Speaker 02

  Wow. Oh, huge. What'd you do?

• 1:08:50Speaker 07

  Yeah. Uh, I, uh, I passed on. Sorry.

• 1:08:55Speaker 02

  I'm fine with that because you put him, I think, number one overall last year. So I'm, I'm, I'm fine with you staying away from Jaden, please.

• 1:09:04Speaker 07

  Looking at Caleb though Caleb.

• 1:09:05Speaker 00

  There we go.

• 1:09:07Speaker 02

  Yeah, you don't want this.

• 1:09:09Speaker 00

  Yeah, I'm a little nervous now. I don't want that. I don't want that. I want that sting.

• 1:09:13Speaker 02

  Also, we're gonna have Zach learn how to do an impression of you, Jerry.

• 1:09:15Speaker 00

  Yeah, he's gonna get on Cameos.

• 1:09:17Speaker 07

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:09:17Speaker 00

  Personator of you. Yeah.

• 1:09:19Speaker 07

  Oh, cool. Maybe he can make fun of my impediment, just like Hank does every time I come on there.

• 1:09:25Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 1:09:25Speaker 00

  He is an acupuncturist.

• 1:09:26Speaker 07

  It's pretty cool.

• 1:09:26Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:09:27Speaker 07

  Ableist. Yeah.

• 1:09:29Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:09:29Speaker 04

  No shame in the impediment game, Jerry.

• 1:09:32Speaker 07

  You know what?

• 1:09:33Speaker 00

  No shaming in the impediment game is what Zach said. He's got you.

• 1:09:37Speaker 07

  Yeah, I mean, no, but Hank, Hank.

• 1:09:40Speaker 03

  All right, Jerry, our phone's gonna die. Our phone's about to die.

• 1:09:42Speaker 07

  Okay. Are you still, you still recording, Max?

• 1:09:47Speaker 03

  We're running it. We're about to be out of battery.

• 1:09:49Speaker 04

  I don't know what you're gonna say. I don't know when to stop.

• 1:09:53Speaker 02

  All right, the next award is Hank Loss of the Year.

• 1:09:56Speaker 00

  Hank Loss of the Year.

• 1:09:58Speaker 02

  From Mr. Bing Bong to Hanky Loss of the Year. Hank's taken to the shorts in the past 15 minutes. That's okay. That's why we love him. Hank Loss of the Year.

• 1:10:07Speaker 00

  I'm excited to see these nominees.

• 1:10:09Speaker 02

  First nominee for Hank Loss of the Year is Liv Golf.

• 1:10:12Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:10:12Speaker 02

  Because.

• 1:10:13Speaker 03

  Currently playing.

• 1:10:15Speaker 02

  Technically still a league. That's the best thing you can say about Liv. The Super Bowl nominated for Hank Loss of the Year. Never really felt like the Patriots were in that one. I was just as heartbroken as Hank, probably, if not more. Tough loss to the Seahawks.

• 1:10:31Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 1:10:33Speaker 02

  The next nominee is the Celtics losing to the Sixers in seven games at Max's bachelor party in Vegas with a suite full of DeLentes.

• 1:10:43Speaker 03

  Bad.

• 1:10:44Speaker 00

  That would, would you say that was one of the worst losses?

• 1:10:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:10:48Speaker 02

  Jalen Brown, great player, though.

• 1:10:50Speaker 04

  Great player.

• 1:10:51Speaker 00

  Great player. Great player.

• 1:10:53Speaker 02

  Really good player.

• 1:10:54Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:10:55Speaker 02

  I gotta say.

• 1:10:56Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:10:57Speaker 04

  Definitely. I'm man enough to say it.

• 1:11:00Speaker 02

  Uh, next nominee for Hank Loss of the Year is Hank switching to lefty. So he's losing his ability to golf right-handed. Giving up on being right-handed.

• 1:11:10Speaker 03

  That's not a loss. That's a win. I've gained another hand.

• 1:11:13Speaker 02

  That's good. That's a good way to look at it.

• 1:11:15Speaker 00

  That's true. You now have two hands. Most people only have one.

• 1:11:17Speaker 02

  But didn't you give up on the old hand?

• 1:11:21Speaker 03

  No, we're just adding a new skill.

• 1:11:23Speaker 02

  Okay, most golfers only use 50% of their God-given ability.

• 1:11:27Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:11:27Speaker 02

  And not you.

• 1:11:28Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:11:29Speaker 02

  The next nominee for Hank lost the year is the Boston Bruins. Boston Bruins.

• 1:11:35Speaker 03

  Yeah, devastating.

• 1:11:36Speaker 04

  That was devastating for you.

• 1:11:37Speaker 02

  Heartbroken about that one.

• 1:11:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:11:39Speaker 02

  Next nominee for Hank lost the year is Mike Frabel.

• 1:11:45Speaker 03

  He's still a coach.

• 1:11:46Speaker 02

  Still a coach.

• 1:11:46Speaker 04

  Still a coach.

• 1:11:47Speaker 03

  Just took us to the Super Bowl.

• 1:11:48Speaker 02

  Except for the Sunday of the NFL Draft.

• 1:11:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, he went to rehab. Guys can't get better. Guys can't fix themselves.

• 1:11:56Speaker 02

  The next nominee for Hank lost the year is the Jalen Brown trade, losing Jalen Brown.

• 1:12:00Speaker 03

  Added Paul George, though, and future picks.

• 1:12:02Speaker 02

  And kept Hugo.

• 1:12:04Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 1:12:04Speaker 04

  You love Paul George.

• 1:12:05Speaker 02

  And Charman, kept Charman and Hugo.

• 1:12:07Speaker 04

  Only but only good things to say about Paul George out of Henry Lockwood.

• 1:12:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, I trust in Brad Stevens. So that's a win.

• 1:12:16Speaker 02

  You got a contract. You got Paul George's contract. Pretty good. The next nominee for Hank lost the year is when you farted during the interview with Kellen Moore. Farted really loudly, although.

• 1:12:28Speaker 04

  That was a win. That was very fun.

• 1:12:29Speaker 02

  I would also like to say it was it was just air escaping his butt. It wasn't a fart. So whoever wrote this category, not fair.

• 1:12:37Speaker 03

  And they didn't factor in physics.

• 1:12:39Speaker 02

  Physics and the chair and the fact that the the Pelicans facility was right next door.

• 1:12:43Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:12:44Speaker 03

  That's why I was wearing the hat.

• 1:12:45Speaker 04

  Right next door.

• 1:12:47Speaker 02

  The next nominee for Hank lost the year, there's a lot of these.

• 1:12:49Speaker 04

  This is damn. It's a lot of losses.

• 1:12:52Speaker 02

  The Duke lost to UConn in front of a record-setting TV audience.

• 1:12:55Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:12:55Speaker 02

  Mind you.

• 1:12:55Speaker 04

  Yes, Brilin Mullins, so wet. And that one hurt because we watched it like 75 times.

• 1:13:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:13:01Speaker 02

  Yeah, and we reenacted it. We have a cameo, a guest presenter for Hank loss of the year.

• 1:13:07Speaker 04

  Oh, who is this? I like this.

• 1:13:09Speaker 06

  And the winner for Hank loss of the year by U-D-A.

• 1:13:19Speaker 00

  Best decision is all of them.

• 1:13:27Speaker 00

  Oh my God.

• 1:13:29Speaker 02

  That's great.

• 1:13:29Speaker 00

  Bruce Buffer, that's the real Bruce Buffer.

• 1:13:32Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:13:32Speaker 00

  That's not an impersonator.

• 1:13:33Speaker 02

  No, that's him. His wife is probably in the next room, just like all day. He's doing that on Cameo.

• 1:13:38Speaker 00

  You had to smile a little bit at that Hank.

• 1:13:41Speaker 03

  That was, that was funny.

• 1:13:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:13:43Speaker 03

  It was a bad year. That, uh, hearing them all stacked up against each other like that.

• 1:13:48Speaker 00

  It's like, cause you get, you do the Super Bowl and then you're like, all right, well that was bad. Then Liv and then the switching the hands and.

• 1:13:54Speaker 03

  I don't think switching hands is not a loss. Liv is not a loss. Some of those were reaches. Uh, but it was, it was a bad year. Can't win every year.

• 1:14:02Speaker 00

  No. But you also cannot.

• 1:14:04Speaker 03

  Rebuilding.

• 1:14:05Speaker 00

  But you lost a lot this year.

• 1:14:07Speaker 03

  Lost a lot in big ways, but like, you know, you gotta, you gotta feel the loss. So you know how to overcome them and then win again.

• 1:14:14Speaker 00

  Yeah. True.

• 1:14:15Speaker 02

  But you used to just win.

• 1:14:17Speaker 03

  No, there's a lot, you know, when you win so much, there's still, there's still losses. But usually the wins outweigh the losses. This has just been a year of L after L.

• 1:14:26Speaker 02

  You actually won at losing the most.

• 1:14:27Speaker 03

  After L.

• 1:14:28Speaker 02

  So congratulations.

• 1:14:29Speaker 00

  Yeah. This is the start of your winning.

• 1:14:31Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:14:31Speaker 02

  Yeah. Cause you went, you win this award.

• 1:14:33Speaker 00

  Yeah. You won the.

• 1:14:33Speaker 03

  I'd like to thank the, uh, the committee for this, uh, award for loss of the year. And I would like to officially start my championship DVD for next year.

• 1:14:41Speaker 00

  Awesome. Good job, Hank. All right. Next up, we have the takey for ratio of the year. Some really good nominees, including some people in this room. Uh, and we'll start with PFT. You're nominated. For ratio of the year because you said on June 12th, hey Paraguay, fuck you. And then Catrial Escobar. Said fuck you too. Quote tweeting you, uh, got seven and, uh, 7,600, uh, retweets. And the quote in 135,000 likes and the retreat was just a picture of a Paraguayan, uh, football player.

• 1:15:22Speaker 00

  Doing a bicycle kick with the ball exploding the World Trade Centers.

• 1:15:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:15:28Speaker 00

  So that was quite.

• 1:15:30Speaker 02

  I'll, I'll take that L.

• 1:15:31Speaker 00

  Yeah. Quite one.

• 1:15:32Speaker 02

  I'll take that L.

• 1:15:32Speaker 00

  That's a hell of a ratio. Uh, 135,000 likes.

• 1:15:39Speaker 00

  It's a great one.

• 1:15:39Speaker 02

  That's absurd.

• 1:15:40Speaker 00

  That's a great one.

• 1:15:41Speaker 02

  Yeah. Hey, football.

• 1:15:42Speaker 00

  Um, Jeff Nadeau's actually nominated, our former coworker for, uh, some, some guy named Brandon Carr said, you corny and fat, go get in the weight room. He quote tweeted it and said, you're, and you're a woman beating piece of shit. And then posted the guy's arrest record. He got 107,000 likes on that ratio.

• 1:16:00Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 1:16:01Speaker 00

  For 4.4, uh, retweets.

• 1:16:04Speaker 02

  That's a man of honor.

• 1:16:05Speaker 00

  Yeah. Emmanuel Ocho is nominated, not once, but twice. The first one is, if I'm Shador Sanders, why am I listening to Todd Munkin? What have you won on an NFL level? He got 4,800 replies, 3,100, uh, tweets, which were mostly all quote tweets, uh, retweets, and then only a thousand likes.

• 1:16:31Speaker 02

  That's tough to do.

• 1:16:32Speaker 00

  That's a really good ratio.

• 1:16:33Speaker 02

  Really, really tough to do. Emmanuel Ocho just continues to cement himself as being the weirdest guy in sports.

• 1:16:38Speaker 00

  Yes, easily. Uh, we also have our own account, Pardon My Take account, because after we lost, uh, what, what, what was this after? March 17th?

• 1:16:48Speaker 06

  Uh, World Baseball Classic.

• 1:16:50Speaker 00

  World Baseball Classic. We tweeted, uh, the US, USA has 60 Super Bowls, Venezuela has zero. And then Leonard Rays, uh, quote tweeted us to the tune of 27,000 likes. And it says, United States, zero domino championships, Venezuela, 61 domino championships.

• 1:17:08Speaker 02

  That's some good shit right there.

• 1:17:09Speaker 00

  That's a really good.

• 1:17:10Speaker 02

  That's really good shit.

• 1:17:11Speaker 00

  Yeah. And then finally Emmanuel Ocho again, because he said, the WNBA would be better without Caitlin Clark, because she is a bigger distraction than he's, than she is additive. That one got 4,000 replies and only a thousand likes.

• 1:17:29Speaker 06

  Also late edition nominee, Pat McAfee for, uh, tweeting out, uh, an album coming out the day after he is getting laid off a bunch of people.

• 1:17:37Speaker 02

  Yeah. Which I will be perching, said album.

• 1:17:39Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 1:17:40Speaker 02

  A hundred percent.

• 1:17:40Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 1:17:41Speaker 02

  I was saying, we should do, we should do McAfee karaoke at some point.

• 1:17:44Speaker 00

  Yes, I'd agree.

• 1:17:45Speaker 02

  Fallout Boy. We're going dun, dun, and early around.

• 1:17:50Speaker 00

  The winner of the ratio of the year. Listen, I went into it being like, we actually didn't put a winner here.

• 1:17:59Speaker 00

  It's gotta be Emmanuel Ocho. He did such great work.

• 1:18:01Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's pretty good.

• 1:18:02Speaker 00

  I mean, those two, the, the, the Shador Sanders should not listen to his head coach.

• 1:18:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:18:07Speaker 00

  Because what has he done in the league? And then Caitlin Clark is actually bad for the WNBA. Unbelievable.

• 1:18:13Speaker 02

  Yeah, you, his takes are sometimes indistinguishable from a man recovering in a hospital from getting attacked by hammers. That is kind of like where his brain is at most days. He got ratioed the other day too, for, for claiming that he, that, that Ryan Clark built NFL Live.

• 1:18:30Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:18:30Speaker 02

  From the ground up.

• 1:18:31Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:18:31Speaker 02

  And then, uh, and then Trey Wingo flew in and he was like, wait, wait one dad burn second. Because if you want to talk about building NFL Live, let me put some stats on you. So Emmanuel Ocho, truly one of the dumbest to ever do it. Can't wait to see what he has cooked up for us this year.

• 1:18:47Speaker 00

  Yeah, he really is. He, I feel like every year he's, he's just, he's, he's basically competing against himself at this point.

• 1:18:53Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:18:53Speaker 00

  There's no one else out there. He's just going to a point.

• 1:18:56Speaker 02

  He's Joey Chestnut.

• 1:18:57Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:18:58Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:18:58Speaker 00

  Yeah. There's like one year that a Berta Letty won.

• 1:19:01Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:19:02Speaker 00

  Everything else, no. All right, Piet, do you want to do an ad before we get to our next award?

• 1:19:07Speaker 02

  Yes, before we get to our next award, I want to remind you guys about our great friends over at Tick Pick. The takeaways are brought to you by Tick Pick, the no fee ticket app. Tick Pick sent the boys to the NBA Finals, got to see the Knicks win a championship. What a moment that was. I got to go out to the US versus Bosnia game, thanks to Tick Pick. Great memories that we'll always have. And Tick Pick wants you to know they've got you covered. Every other ticket site will tell you that their fees are included in the price, but included isn't gone. Tick Pick took a different road. No service fees at all. Never has charged one, never will. That's the whole pitch. No service fees ever from Tick Pick. The same exact seat, same section, same row, costs less on Tick Pick.

• 1:19:49Speaker 02

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• 1:20:31Speaker 00

  Ooh.

• 1:20:32Speaker 02

  There were a lot of, a lot of victories that in the moment felt huge and in retrospect, uh, we're not, we're really not worth anything. Mm hmm. Uh, so the nominees for the week one Super Bowl win of the year. Mm hmm. Are the Philadelphia 76ers beating the Boston Celtics in game seven. In the first round of the playoffs.

• 1:20:53Speaker 00

  That was huge.

• 1:20:54Speaker 04

  Technically, that would, that wouldn't be week one. That'd be.

• 1:20:56Speaker 00

  Well, it's, it's talking about, it's, it, the sentiment is like, oh, congrats on your week one Super Bowl. You're not going to win anything else.

• 1:21:05Speaker 04

  Well, that'd be round, that'd be round one.

• 1:21:07Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's not an actual literal week one.

• 1:21:10Speaker 02

  Max, I'm just going to spoil it for you. None of these are actually week one NFL games.

• 1:21:14Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 1:21:15Speaker 00

  But you understand.

• 1:21:16Speaker 02

  A figure of speech.

• 1:21:17Speaker 04

  Like round one would, would have made more sense.

• 1:21:20Speaker 00

  Well, not all of them are round one. Three out of four are round one. One is round three.

• 1:21:29Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 1:21:29Speaker 02

  The expression, week one, Super Bowl.

• 1:21:32Speaker 00

  It's the celebration after a big win that then immediately follows a big loss.

• 1:21:38Speaker 04

  Got it.

• 1:21:38Speaker 02

  Yeah. So the Sixers were very happy and then reality came.

• 1:21:43Speaker 04

  Yep. I'm, I'm, I'm curious to continue listening to these.

• 1:21:46Speaker 02

  Okay. Uh, the second nominee is.

• 1:21:48Speaker 00

  You did the nominees.

• 1:21:49Speaker 04

  Yeah, I know.

• 1:21:50Speaker 02

  The Chicago Bears.

• 1:21:51Speaker 04

  There we go. Just wanted to make sure that one was in there.

• 1:21:52Speaker 00

  It's on there. It's number two.

• 1:21:54Speaker 04

  Just wanted to make sure it was in there.

• 1:21:54Speaker 00

  You have the same Google document as us.

• 1:21:56Speaker 02

  It's in there. It's in there. Actually us getting under your skin for that first nominee. That was, that was a week one Super Bowl we just had.

• 1:22:03Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:22:04Speaker 02

  For this category.

• 1:22:04Speaker 00

  And we do that all the time.

• 1:22:05Speaker 04

  You're about to have a big loss.

• 1:22:07Speaker 02

  Yeah. Cause we both have two nominees coming up. Uh, the Bears over the Packers.

• 1:22:12Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 1:22:12Speaker 02

  In the playoffs.

• 1:22:14Speaker 00

  Fair is fair.

• 1:22:15Speaker 02

  Great time.

• 1:22:16Speaker 00

  So much fun.

• 1:22:16Speaker 02

  And then you ran into the big bad man.

• 1:22:19Speaker 00

  He's not that big or bad.

• 1:22:23Speaker 00

  He's like medium sized.

• 1:22:24Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:22:25Speaker 00

  He's a good player.

• 1:22:26Speaker 02

  Stafford, yeah, no, he's a good player. Hey, good player. Hey, like Jalen Brown, he's a good player.

• 1:22:29Speaker 00

  Good player.

• 1:22:30Speaker 02

  And McFay's six pack?

• 1:22:31Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:22:32Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:22:33Speaker 00

  14 pack.

• 1:22:33Speaker 02

  Uh, the third nominee is, uh, JMU covering in the first round of the college football playoff against Oregon. Uh, that would be, uh, a victory that was not a victory at all, but we'll take them where we can get them. And then the last nominee is the San Antonio Spurs beating the Oklahoma City Thunder. And everybody thinking that this is Wimby's time to shine. Congrats to the Spurs for winning an NBA championship.

• 1:22:54Speaker 00

  Crying his eyes out.

• 1:22:55Speaker 02

  Cry, cry his eyes out.

• 1:22:57Speaker 00

  I had no problem with, but you gotta win the, you gotta win the title after that.

• 1:23:00Speaker 02

  Yep. Um, so we have, we have an award presenter for this. This was, uh, Hank. Hank got a presenter here.

• 1:23:06Speaker 03

  Two presenters.

• 1:23:06Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 1:23:07Speaker 07

  What's up, boys? The Lente Brothers here, broadcasting from Rittenhouse, uh, Square in Philadelphia. We're here to present the week one Super Bowl winner of the year and accept the award on behalf of the Sixers beating the Celtics in game seven of round one.

• 1:23:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, very, uh, honored and, uh, privileged to be accepting this award on behalf of all Philadelphia. Uh, as everyone knows, we were out in Vegas for this incredible feat.

• 1:23:32Speaker 04

  This isn't a good thing, boys.

• 1:23:34Speaker 03

  We just really took it to those Celtics, you know, um, just put them in their place and now we've supplanted them as, uh, the top dog in the division. We really had a hell of a time out there.

• 1:23:44Speaker 04

  Not true. Nick literally won the NBA championship, Nick.

• 1:23:47Speaker 03

  Las Vegas with dinners and celebrations and, and, uh, just good vibes all around. So, um, it was a hell of a Super Bowl and, uh, we're happy that, uh, we were with, uh, our buddy Hank for it.

• 1:23:57Speaker 04

  I can't believe he's doing it.

• 1:23:58Speaker 07

  A little surprised that we're not getting the award for the greatest leasing of the year.

• 1:24:03Speaker 04

  There we go.

• 1:24:03Speaker 07

  Mike Dancy just did to Brad Stevens getting Jalen Brown.

• 1:24:07Speaker 03

  Yep. And, uh, we'll say it one more time. Jalen Brown.

• 1:24:11Speaker 07

  Very good player.

• 1:24:14Speaker 00

  I love it. Hank, by the way, in like planning out the take, he's kind of a mishmash. I'm trying to get everything organized and sending, hey, you get this cameo, you get that cameo. This morning I, I saw this award and I was like, oh shit, we don't have a cameo for it. I texted Double D and I was like, hey, can you send a video for this award? And he's like, Hank texted me yesterday, me and Nick already got it. So we're, we're same wavelength.

• 1:24:37Speaker 02

  We're alive.

• 1:24:37Speaker 00

  Same wavelength. And he said, he noted, great category, though I, I stand by that we should have one for biggest fleecing. I wanted to do Delente of the year award. I think it goes to Double D.

• 1:24:49Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:24:50Speaker 00

  Just for, just for talking to himself with a T box saying, come on, Double D.

• 1:24:53Speaker 02

  I would agree.

• 1:24:53Speaker 04

  You just like the nickname Double D.

• 1:24:55Speaker 00

  I love the Double D.

• 1:24:56Speaker 04

  That's really what it is.

• 1:24:57Speaker 00

  I'm a tits guy. What do you want me to say? Oh man, we got, we might have to do another bachelor party. Just this room partying, but bringing your brothers. Cause I miss them. They're the best.

• 1:25:11Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:25:11Speaker 00

  Look at them. I can't believe they accepted. I can't believe they accepted.

• 1:25:14Speaker 04

  They were like, Nick was proud of, to win this award. See, this is, they don't understand.

• 1:25:21Speaker 03

  No, they didn't push back at all.

• 1:25:23Speaker 02

  Hank was so happy during the entire presentation.

• 1:25:25Speaker 00

  Oh man. They were, yeah. They, they're, they're raising a banner.

• 1:25:30Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:25:32Speaker 00

  Oh man. All right. Great award. Great award. All right. We, next up, we have Michigan man of the year. Michigan was big in sports this year. We had coaches getting fired for weird things. We had bestselling authors, Dave Portnoy, we had national championships in basketball. So Michigan man of the year, the nominees are Sharon Moore, Michigan man of the year. Keeping Michigan on task this year. Maybe not the best year possible, but hey, listen. He, you know, they won a few games here and there. They also got Bryce Underwood going. So Michigan man of the year, Sharon Moore is nominated.

• 1:26:09Speaker 02

  Yeah. Was it a good tenure? Who's to say?

• 1:26:10Speaker 00

  Yeah. Dave Portnoy, our boss, congratulations on the New York Times bestseller. You are nominated for Michigan man of the year. We also have Ward Manuel for. Being an AD who's won a national championship in both basketball and football.

• 1:26:26Speaker 02

  Few and far between.

• 1:26:27Speaker 00

  Yep. Uh, Dusty May, Dusty May for winning a national title, then going to the Mavericks. Some say the greatest Michigan man to, to get out of there, but.

• 1:26:36Speaker 02

  Is there anything more Michigan man than leaving before the consequences arrive?

• 1:26:40Speaker 00

  No, that is the most Michigan man. And then we have Adam Schefter, uh, for just being a Michigan man.

• 1:26:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:26:46Speaker 00

  Through and through. Okay. Uh, I have a special guest for Michigan man of the year.

• 1:26:52Speaker 01

  Hi, this is Dave Portnoy, Michigan class of 99 here to present the award for Michigan man of the year. And the winner is Sharon Moore. Congrats, coach. Hope you're doing well.

• 1:27:08Speaker 00

  I don't know what Quigs put in the AI prompts for Dave to like go to the envelope. But if you saw the AI got a little confused there and he just, he put his hand in front of him and then pulled out absolutely nothing.

• 1:27:19Speaker 02

  Nothing. I, I want to see like which, uh, which videos of Dave the AI drew onto, to go with that beard.

• 1:27:26Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's a good beard. It's actually a really good haircut he's got right there. So congrats to Sharon Moore, Michigan man of the year.

• 1:27:33Speaker 02

  Huge. Congrats.

• 1:27:34Speaker 00

  Loves that for him. He really embodies everything that Michigan is and believes.

• 1:27:39Speaker 02

  Yep. Uh, the next category is the wedding of the year. We love love on part of my take. The nominees for a wedding of the year 2026 are Max.

• 1:27:49Speaker 00

  Max.

• 1:27:50Speaker 02

  Max getting married.

• 1:27:51Speaker 00

  Max, you got married a lot.

• 1:27:52Speaker 02

  This is gonna be, this is gonna be four nominations. Wedding number one is the first nominee. Uh, next nominee is Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift got married, uh, at Madison Square Garden, something that we all thought for sure would be way, way too tacky for her. Um, but it sounds like it was a great wedding. Dean Blandino was there and I think everybody had a great time.

• 1:28:11Speaker 03

  They couldn't sit down and eat dinner.

• 1:28:12Speaker 02

  Yeah. Oh. Wow. I didn't know about that.

• 1:28:14Speaker 00

  I didn't know about that either.

• 1:28:16Speaker 02

  Standing dinner?

• 1:28:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, people were just like standing around.

• 1:28:20Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 1:28:20Speaker 03

  Wore enough seats.

• 1:28:22Speaker 02

  Uh, the next nominee for wedding of the year is, uh, Max wedding number two.

• 1:28:27Speaker 00

  Ah.

• 1:28:27Speaker 02

  The second time Max got married.

• 1:28:28Speaker 00

  Second time.

• 1:28:29Speaker 02

  Yep. Uh, the next nominee for wedding of the year is Pug. 99 Pug. Pug got married this year.

• 1:28:35Speaker 00

  Love Pug.

• 1:28:35Speaker 02

  We love you, Pug. Next nominee for wedding of the year is Sam Darnold. Congratulations, Sam.

• 1:28:41Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:28:42Speaker 02

  I, to be honest, I forgot that Sam Darnold got married.

• 1:28:44Speaker 00

  He did get married.

• 1:28:45Speaker 02

  Uh, the next nominee for Wedding of the Year is Tyrese Halliburton.

• 1:28:48Speaker 00

  Also forgot he got married. Oh, no, he got married like yesterday.

• 1:28:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, congrats, Tyrese Halliburton.

• 1:28:52Speaker 00

  Late, late entry.

• 1:28:53Speaker 02

  Late entry. Um, the winner for Wedding of the Year, we have a guest presenter.

• 1:28:59Speaker 00

  Ooh.

• 1:29:02Speaker 03

  And the winner for the 2026 Takey for Wedding of the Year. And have the envelope, please. Thank you.

• 1:29:22Speaker 03

  Max Dolente.

• 1:29:24Speaker 00

  Hey!

• 1:29:25Speaker 03

  Congratulations, fellow paisano.

• 1:29:29Speaker 00

  Love it.

• 1:29:30Speaker 04

  That's good paisan.

• 1:29:31Speaker 00

  Furio from, from, uh, Sopranos and he, he made an actual card that said Takeys.

• 1:29:37Speaker 02

  Pretty impressive stuff.

• 1:29:38Speaker 00

  Did he do that?

• 1:29:38Speaker 04

  That's good, that's a good touch.

• 1:29:40Speaker 02

  It looked like it said 2026 Takeys on that.

• 1:29:41Speaker 00

  That's incredible.

• 1:29:42Speaker 02

  Thank you, Furio.

• 1:29:43Speaker 00

  That guy does his cameos right.

• 1:29:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's a guy you want to go back to. Give that guy a rating.

• 1:29:48Speaker 00

  Yep, absolutely. Yeah, screenshot that. We'll use that for some promo. That's incredible.

• 1:29:53Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:29:54Speaker 00

  Uh, okay.

• 1:29:55Speaker 02

  I still wish he had pushed Tony into that, that propeller that one time.

• 1:29:58Speaker 00

  I know.

• 1:29:59Speaker 02

  Cause like after that happened, then Tony goes on, he has, he kills Christopher.

• 1:30:02Speaker 00

  Him and Carmelo were perfect together.

• 1:30:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:30:04Speaker 00

  Uh, Max, congratulations. Do you accept?

• 1:30:08Speaker 04

  I, yes, I accept.

• 1:30:09Speaker 03

  One more? You got one more in you?

• 1:30:12Speaker 00

  You got one more in you?

• 1:30:13Speaker 04

  Nah, done. Done.

• 1:30:16Speaker 00

  Uh, all right. Next up, we have Animal of the Year. Animal of the Year. This has been a big year for animals, fun animals. Uh, first up, we have Neil the Seal. The sea lion, actually, in, uh, where was he? Was he in South Africa?

• 1:30:33Speaker 02

  South Africa, I guess.

• 1:30:34Speaker 00

  He was just wrecking shit. He was like a 10,000 pounds, just dummying everything in sight. And everyone was just like, hey, we gotta let Neil the Seal do his thing. We have the bison who flipped the old man upside down, probably video of the year, if we're being honest. We have the snakes in China, the snakes in China who were in that river of the flood. That was fucked up. Punch the monkey, which we've spoken about, punch the monkey. I, I still maintain that I would like to do a vibe check on punch the monkey. He was the monkey that got bullied and everyone felt bad for him. No one asked a simple question, is punch the monkey just a bad hang?

• 1:31:13Speaker 02

  I was watching that and I was just seeing nature take its course. It seemed like they knew that punch was going to get them in trouble.

• 1:31:19Speaker 00

  Yeah. And then the last is uh, Jimothy, the mutant raccoon that has gone viral recently. Jimothy, yeah.

• 1:31:26Speaker 02

  So the mascot of the Titans?

• 1:31:28Speaker 00

  Uh, he's not the mascot of the Titans. He might be. All right. Do we have animal of the year?

• 1:31:32Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 1:31:33Speaker 00

  Oh, wow.

• 1:31:33Speaker 02

  We do.

• 1:31:34Speaker 00

  Wow.

• 1:31:36Speaker 03

  Oh my God.

• 1:31:38Speaker 04

  Our favorite animal.

• 1:31:39Speaker 00

  Our favorite animal.

• 1:31:40Speaker 05

  What's up guys? This is former president Pug here, just announcing the takey winner for animal of the year. Without further ado, the winner is the bison who flipped that guy over. Hope all's well, fellas. Miss you. Pug.

• 1:31:58Speaker 04

  Banger, banger.

• 1:31:59Speaker 00

  Oh, so good. You surprised us with that.

• 1:32:03Speaker 05

  Pug.

• 1:32:04Speaker 00

  You told us it was gonna be someone else.

• 1:32:05Speaker 04

  Well, yeah, that person, that person said no, so.

• 1:32:07Speaker 00

  Oh, so you got Pug last minute?

• 1:32:10Speaker 04

  Yeah, Pug, Pug sent that in like 20 minutes ago.

• 1:32:12Speaker 00

  Pug's always there for us. Always there. Always will be. Always there for us. Okay.

• 1:32:17Speaker 02

  Uh, the next category is ball of the year. New category, ball of the year.

• 1:32:23Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 1:32:24Speaker 02

  And the nominees are LaMelo, LaMelo Ball, uh, not the world's best driver, but he's got a change of scenery, entire new municipality to terrorize with his car.

• 1:32:36Speaker 02

  Oldie is nominated for ball of the year.

• 1:32:37Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:32:38Speaker 02

  Oldie's balls, uh, he was showing them to anybody that would look at the, the bonfire last year at Camp Forestal.

• 1:32:44Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:32:44Speaker 02

  The pouch is what legends are made out of. Uh, actually, I don't know what that's made out of. Uh, but shout out to Oldie and his balls. Uh, next nominee for ball of the year is Solo. Solo ball.

• 1:32:55Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 1:32:56Speaker 02

  Just having solo ball on TV.

• 1:32:58Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 1:32:58Speaker 02

  Great, great for balls.

• 1:32:59Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 1:33:00Speaker 02

  Uh, new nominee, I just put this in right now.

• 1:33:03Speaker 00

  Yeah, I was wondering what that was going on.

• 1:33:04Speaker 02

  Joshua Kuroda-Grower has been nominated for ball of the year. He's, he plays for the Oak, or for the Athletics. Foul tipped a ball into his own ball.

• 1:33:14Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:33:14Speaker 02

  Last night, ruptured his testicle.

• 1:33:17Speaker 00

  Ah.

• 1:33:17Speaker 02

  At the plate, stayed in the game, got a base hit and then went to the hospital.

• 1:33:23Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:33:24Speaker 02

  We had to have emergency surgery.

• 1:33:26Speaker 00

  Fuck.

• 1:33:26Speaker 02

  So that's one tough ball.

• 1:33:28Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 1:33:29Speaker 02

  And then the final nominee for ball of the year is Tyler Shuck.

• 1:33:34Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:33:34Speaker 02

  Cause it's just so fucking catchable.

• 1:33:36Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:33:37Speaker 02

  Such a good ball.

• 1:33:38Speaker 00

  I can't wait for Shuck season.

• 1:33:39Speaker 02

  Such a good ball.

• 1:33:41Speaker 00

  Do you guys have to play Shuck this year?

• 1:33:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, I believe there's a redemption game on schedule.

• 1:33:45Speaker 00

  You have two, you have two, twice.

• 1:33:47Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:33:48Speaker 00

  Does anyone else have to play Shuck? Cause that would break my heart.

• 1:33:51Speaker 02

  Uh, let's see, so let's see what the Saints' schedule is.

• 1:33:53Speaker 00

  The, I.

• 1:33:54Speaker 02

  I should know this.

• 1:33:56Speaker 00

  I do not think the Bears play the Saints this year.

• 1:33:58Speaker 02

  And the Saints play the Lions.

• 1:34:00Speaker 03

  We do not play the Saints.

• 1:34:02Speaker 00

  Oh shit, we do play the Saints, fuck.

• 1:34:04Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:34:04Speaker 00

  Oh yeah, that's right. We, I think we play the.

• 1:34:06Speaker 02

  You're the only one in this room, I think.

• 1:34:07Speaker 00

  Play the NFC South, yeah, fuck. Fuck.

• 1:34:11Speaker 02

  Well, at least you get to play the NFC South.

• 1:34:12Speaker 00

  November 22nd, okay. All right, well, sorry, sorry, Shuck.

• 1:34:17Speaker 02

  Happy Shucks, yeah.

• 1:34:18Speaker 00

  We're gonna have to, we're gonna have to intercept that catchable ball.

• 1:34:21Speaker 02

  Uh, the winner of ball of the year, I believe we have a guest presenter for this one too.

• 1:34:26Speaker 00

  That's right. I'm LeVar Ball, the big CEO with a big ball of brand. And you know, I got a hell of an announcement to make. That's right. The winner of the 2026 tacky for ball of the year is Tyler.

• 1:34:41Speaker 07

  Show that's how it's going down the quarterback for the New Orleans Saints. Triple B style, big baller Brandon is in the building and you know how we do this. Again, the winner of the 2026 take it for ball of the year is Tyler show. That is big ballers out in Iowa.

• 1:35:05Speaker 00

  Great job.

• 1:35:06Speaker 02

  Haven't heard from LeVar in a while.

• 1:35:07Speaker 00

  Great to see LeVar.

• 1:35:08Speaker 02

  Good to see you still out there doing this.

• 1:35:10Speaker 00

  Great to see LeVar. Okay, so Tyler shock, congratulations, ball of the year. Well, well deserved. All right, next up we have a new category. It is the gorilla trade of the year. The nominee is the Pittsburgh Zoo trading with the Boston Zoo. The getting little Joe for Frankie.

• 1:35:34Speaker 00

  And that's the only nominee. So let's get to the winner.

• 1:35:37Speaker 07

  The takey award for the gorilla trade of the year goes to Pittsburgh for trading Frankie to Boston for little Joe. And it's not true that Boston is going to get a gorilla to be named later.

• 1:35:49Speaker 00

  And that is the king, Mike Francesa. Thank you so much to Mike Francesa for, he does not have cameo, by the way. His son, it works for us and he's great. And it was very funny because I asked him and Mike Francesa is the best, but he, he was like, I was talking to his son. I was like, hey, we really like it if, if, if he could do the takey award for gorilla trade of the year.

• 1:36:14Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:36:15Speaker 00

  And he was like, all right, he's going to think about it. And I said, all right, well, let me know if you need me to like call him or text him or, or anything to explain it more. He said, no, no, he understands he's going to sleep on it. And then he got back to us, the king.

• 1:36:27Speaker 02

  And he's like, I've decided, I've decided we're going to do this.

• 1:36:30Speaker 00

  Yeah, we're going to do it.

• 1:36:30Speaker 02

  Do the gorilla trade.

• 1:36:32Speaker 00

  And bonus, we have a very special bonus. We actually talked to the CEO of the Pittsburgh Zoo to see if he would accept the takey for gorilla trade of the year and break down the actual trade. So let's do that. Okay, now on to officially accept the takey for gorilla trade of the year is the Pittsburgh Zoo president and CEO Jeremy Goodman. Jeremy, thank you so much for joining us. First of all, congratulations, you have won gorilla trade of the year.

• 1:37:06Speaker 06

  Now, thank you so much. This is an honor. I mean, you know, it's something that as a little boy, you always.

• 1:37:12Speaker 07

  Think about and growing up, you know, in the zoo world about winning that gorilla trade. And, uh, you know, the fact that we were able to pull that off this year, you know, it was a total team effort.

• 1:37:22Speaker 00

  That's awesome. So, so can you walk us through the trade? When is the trade like, are you making calls all the time? Are you calling zoos everywhere around America being like, who's on the market? Is there a trade deadline with zoos? How does that work?

• 1:37:35Speaker 07

  Yeah, there is no official trade deadline. We're always talking with our, the other zoos. You know, we're more like colleagues than competitors, but, um, you know, everybody's trying to have the best zoo possible, um, just like the best team possible. And, uh, you know, we're always looking for new animals, different animals, trying to make sure that, uh, get the right matches, you know? Chemistry is really important. You can't just put two animals together and, uh, and win a Super Bowl. It's, uh, same sort of thing. It's, uh, you know, trying to do your homework and, uh, you know, scouting and, uh, very similar in a lot of ways. And, uh, that's how you get success and get a winning team.

• 1:38:15Speaker 02

  Can you walk us through this particular trade? When you decided to pull the trigger on it, what other offers there might've been out there? And what the overall strategy was for you behind why you thought this was a good fit?

• 1:38:26Speaker 07

  Yeah, I mean, you know, we were, uh, silverback is, is the most important position in a gorilla troop or gorilla team, if you will. And we were down, uh, a silverback, you know? We, we just didn't have one anymore and, uh, it was a big hole to fill and, uh, we were looking all over and, um, you know, we, the rest of the team, uh, you know, our females, we had some youngsters that really needed that, that kind of big role model to, to look up to. Uh, and somebody who would be good with the youngsters. So, uh, you know, we did our homework and, uh, you know, Lil Joe was on the top of the list, um, you know, and, uh, you know, his genes weren't represented, but.

• 1:39:03Speaker 00

  You know, he, we really thought he would be a great fit and, you know, our, our, our younger guy Frankie, um, you know, he, he, he was an amazing animal. I mean, like, you know, he was born here, homegrown talent, um, really just, uh, you know, everybody loved him. Um, but, you know, it was his time to shine and his time to move on and, uh, you know, become part of a, another team, another troop. And, uh, um, you know, he's, he's wreaking havoc over there in, uh, in Boston and, uh, little Joe is, uh, um, just trying to fit in with his teammate, his new teammates here. So the plan with little Joe, and, and we, we obviously aren't, uh, experts. We're not Adam Schefter or Ian Rappaport when it comes to these type of trades, but what we

• 1:39:47Speaker 00

  understood, and maybe you can correct me, is that little Joe now, you could potentially have more gorillas. You can make more gorillas with little Joe, whereas Frankie's not ready for that yet. So this is a play for the future where you can, you can basically rebuild in the farm system with little Joe potentially producing more gorillas. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, that's the job of a silverback and, uh, you know, to, uh, that's the primary job, uh, other than defending the, the team and the troop, uh, it's, it's to produce little, little gorillas. And, uh, that's what we're really hoping for, uh, that he hits it off with, uh, with our females. And, uh, you know, before you hit silverback age, uh, you're, you're in your bachelor years and that's where Frankie is right now. And he's with the bachelor troop, uh, over in Boston and, and they're doing their thing,

• 1:40:31Speaker 00

  uh, not ready to, you know, they're, they're just in a different stage of life as, as little Joe is. And, you know, this is something that, uh, you know, we're, we're ready now. We've got, uh, some great females here and, uh, just really hoping little Joe, uh, meshes with everybody and, uh, we have those little, little gorillas to help the species.

• 1:40:49Speaker 02

  That's interesting. It's a silverback driven league is what I'm hearing. And so that was a, that was a big glaring hole that you had on your roster. It sounds like you filled it. I, I hope that he's able to make some more gorillas for you. How common are these types of trades? How, how often do you engage in, uh, not just gorillas, but maybe anything that you have at the zoo? How often are you on the phone with somebody else talking about a potential trade?

• 1:41:09Speaker 00

  Um, yeah, pretty frequently, actually. Uh, it's not, it's not always a one for

• 1:41:14Speaker 07

  One trade, um, a lot of times, uh, you know, it's the player to be named later type of, uh, type of deal. Um, but yeah, we, we're talking with, uh, um, you know, some other zoos right now about, uh, them taking some of our, you know, one or two of our animals and us getting a few in return. And, uh, the good thing about zoos is, you know, we're all very cooperative and we all want to see each other succeed because it's all about the animals. And, uh, and that's really what all these, these trades and, uh, you know, are about is, is just making sure that everybody has, has that right winning team combo.

• 1:41:47Speaker 00

  As you're, uh, in your career as president and CEO, have you had a trade that you've looked back on and been like, I, I kind of messed that one up?

• 1:41:55Speaker 07

  Um, not that I've messed up, but I, you know, there was one trade that I just had to steal the century.

• 1:42:02Speaker 00

  Oh, tell us.

• 1:42:04Speaker 07

  Yeah. Yeah. Just, uh, worked with another zoo. Um, we were looking, we had, uh, it was a giant tortoise trade and, uh, they were looking for some new genetics and we had some baby giant tortoises, uh, which weren't so giant yet. And in return, we got some, uh, you know, 600 pounders. And, uh, I couldn't believe I pulled that one off, but, um, you know, once again, we got what we needed and, uh, they got what they needed. And, uh, that's, that's the definition of a good trade in the end is everybody wins.

• 1:42:33Speaker 02

  You do sound like Howie Roseman. That's like almost word for word what he described to us when we're like sometime, you know, you've had your way with a couple of other teams, got some really good trades. He's like, you know, ultimately we want everybody to be better. We, the best trades are the win wins. You feel like bar for bar, you are the Howie Roseman of zoo, zoos, I think.

• 1:42:50Speaker 00

  It's smart. You want, yeah, you want to, you want to keep everyone else wanting to trade with you because if they have a bad time.

• 1:42:55Speaker 07

  A lot of parody in this league. Yeah. We, we really, uh, yeah, want to keep everybody on an even playing field. And, you know, uh, although we want our zoo to be the number one zoo and finish, you know, number one each year. Um, you know, we, uh, have no animosity to anybody else.

• 1:43:10Speaker 00

  Where, where do you guys rank?

• 1:43:12Speaker 07

  You know, ranking zoos is, is pretty arbitrary. Uh, you know, some people rank off of, uh, acreage, number of animals, uh, um, you know, different amenities. Uh, yeah, I think we were pretty high up there. Uh, in fact, we have both a zoo and aquarium and have over 10,000 animals here in Pittsburgh is, uh, you know, puts us pretty high on the list and, uh, You know, certainly if little Joe does his job, uh, we'll be moving up in those rankings.

• 1:43:38Speaker 02

  I would, I would measure it by smiles per customer. The happier you make.

• 1:43:43Speaker 07

  We have plenty of those. All I gotta do is look out my window and see all the smiling kids and adults and uh, just shows you why we're in this business.

• 1:43:50Speaker 02

  Are, are there ways that you can tell when maybe an animal is not happy at the zoo? I know you, you'd never want to have an animal that doesn't feel like they're a fit there, but can you tell when maybe an animal is doing their version of requesting a trade? Uh, maybe it's like James Harden, they get heavy, uh, they appear sluggish and lethargic. And at that time, you know, it's time to move on or has that ever happened to you?

• 1:44:11Speaker 07

  Um, you know, not every trade works out. Not every, you know, acquisition works out. Uh, you know, we try to make them all work. Uh, but if sometimes they don't, then, um, you know, depending on the situation, you know, sometimes you just have to move that animal on to another location where they can succeed. Um, it, it really depends. You know, there's a lot of things that, that our staff, our keepers do to try to make sure that each and every one of the animals that comes into our facility, uh, um, is happy and successful, but uh, sometimes it's like you said, it's just not the right fit. And uh, if that's the case, then we work to try to make sure that we get that, that, that individual into a, a better place where it is a good fit.

• 1:44:50Speaker 00

  Is there a win now mode for zoos? Because I feel like when you guys have, when, when a zoo has a big baby birth, that's like a win now mode. Like we're, we're in Chicago, the Lincoln Park Zoo just had a baby rhino. And I took my kids there instantly. I was like, we gotta go see the baby rhino and it was so fucking cute. So is there, do you guys, when you guys have a big baby, uh, born, are you like, oh, we gotta, let's go, let's hammer it. Let's get out in the press. Let's let everyone know, hey, we got a baby seal. We got a baby giraffe. We got all these babies. We gotta, you gotta come see them.

• 1:45:20Speaker 07

  Yeah. I mean, I think all zoos are in win now mode. Um, you know, I think, uh, with the rate of, uh, species becoming endangered every day and going extinct, uh, we have to be in win mode, uh, win now mode. Um, you know, otherwise we're gonna lose more species. So, yeah, it's something, uh, it's great, you know, for visitors to come out and see, but you know, the bottom line is, is that, uh, we're really trying to, uh, you know, save all these different, uh, incredible animals and, uh, um, you know, and when we had, I mean, we just debuted a baby lion cub and.

• 1:45:50Speaker 00

  You know, she is amazing and you know, people are coming out like crazy, but it's, it's more than that. It's really about, you know, continuing to make sure that that species is around forever. And uh, um, so that our grandkids and their kids can, uh, you know, experience the same really cool animals that we do today. That's awesome. All right. So Jeremy, thank you so much for joining us. I have one last question. It's a Roback question. R H O B A C K dot com promo code take 20% off your first purchase. Q Zips polo, uh, polos, joggers, everything. Roback.com promo code take. Zach, you ready?

• 1:46:22Speaker 02

  Sir, Jeremy, how are we doing today, sir?

• 1:46:24Speaker 00

  Good. How are you?

• 1:46:25Speaker 02

  Having a great day. I did have a quick question for you. Uh, I was curious throughout your, uh, you know, zoo career, moving up the ranks, getting to the office that you do hold now. Is there anyone you can point to that maybe you shaped your game after, like took inspiration from when, uh, climbing these ranks, getting to where you're at today?

• 1:46:40Speaker 00

  Yeah. I mean, there, there's a lot of folks that I, I've really looked up to over the years and, um, surprisingly enough, uh, you might not expect this one, but, uh, Walt Disney, um, was a, a big fan, just, uh, how visionary he was and, you know, just to look at some Florida swamp and, and, you know, envision this whole big, uh, incredible, uh, park and enterprise. Um, very, uh, try to learn a lot from, uh, from, uh, Walt and everything he's done. And within the zoo world, there, there's so many mentors that I've had that, um, you know, probably too numerous to name, but, uh, yeah, uh, there's a lot of people that, that I've looked up to that have helped shape my career and that I, I owe a lot to. So, uh, very much, uh, indebted to all those folks. Great question, Zach.

• 1:47:24Speaker 02

  Great question.

• 1:47:24Speaker 00

  Yeah. Well, Jeremy, thank you so much for joining us. Congratulations again. Uh, we'll, we actually could make you, uh, we'll, we'll make you a plaque and we'll send it to the zoo. If you want to, if you want to put it up somewhere. I have a spot on my wall, ready for it. I love it. I love it.

• 1:47:37Speaker 02

  And Jeremy, if, if you make any more trades, let us know. We would love to be like the, the news breakers for, for any zoo trades that happen. We would love to be ground zero for those. So if, if you've got anything, or if there's an animal that you have on the trading block right now, we can even, maybe try to gas that up a little bit. Other zookeepers that listen to this podcast know that you've got something that you're looking to maybe wheel and deal on.

• 1:47:59Speaker 00

  Yeah. Or even like other, other zoos. You're like, I'm here in the Kansas City zoo is like looking for a giraffe. We'll post that. We'll put that out there.

• 1:48:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:48:07Speaker 00

  Sounds good.

• 1:48:08Speaker 02

  First to know.

• 1:48:09Speaker 00

  Okay, thank you so much. Appreciate it.

• 1:48:11Speaker 02

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• 1:48:55Speaker 02

  You just have to visit simplysafe.com/pmt. It's half off, simplysafe.com/pmt. There's no safe like Simply Safe. Get 50% off that new system, simplysafe.com/pmt.

• 1:49:12Speaker 00

  Okay, what do we got next, PFT?

• 1:49:14Speaker 02

  We got a-

• 1:49:15Speaker 00

  Rounding up, we're getting close to the end here.

• 1:49:17Speaker 02

  Great category next is the Still Alive Person of the Year.

• 1:49:20Speaker 00

  Oh, love this.

• 1:49:21Speaker 02

  Still Alive Person of the Year. The nominees for Still Alive Person of the Year. Ray Charles, whose voice was used during the All-Star Game and is not still alive.

• 1:49:31Speaker 00

  But he's still alive to me and Hank.

• 1:49:32Speaker 03

  And the video too.

• 1:49:34Speaker 00

  Yeah, they duped us.

• 1:49:37Speaker 02

  What video are you-

• 1:49:38Speaker 03

  They made it look like he was on the field.

• 1:49:39Speaker 00

  Yeah, they made it look like he was right there. That was bullshit.

• 1:49:41Speaker 02

  The next nominee for Still Alive Person of the Year, Joe Biden. President Joe Biden.

• 1:49:46Speaker 03

  Very much.

• 1:49:46Speaker 02

  We've just seen that Joe Biden is 100% still alive. Also nominated for Still Alive Person of the Year, Mitch McConnell. We know that he's still alive because-

• 1:49:57Speaker 00

  100% still alive.

• 1:49:57Speaker 02

  He, somebody put a newspaper in his hand, which is what you do to somebody when you take their picture.

• 1:50:02Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 1:50:03Speaker 02

  Next nominee for Still Alive Person of the Year is Mr. Pear. Mr. Pear-

• 1:50:07Speaker 00

  Mr. Pear's still alive?

• 1:50:08Speaker 02

  Turtle memes.

• 1:50:11Speaker 06

  Still Alive has Bachelor Pad in Missouri.

• 1:50:13Speaker 02

  All right.

• 1:50:14Speaker 00

  Hell yeah.

• 1:50:14Speaker 02

  [email protected].

• 1:50:16Speaker 00

  We should go visit.

• 1:50:17Speaker 06

  [email protected].

• 1:50:19Speaker 02

  Thank you, thank you Max. The next nominee for Still Alive Person of the Year is Ted Turner.

• 1:50:26Speaker 00

  Still alive?

• 1:50:27Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:50:28Speaker 00

  Ah, but Ray Charles is.

• 1:50:30Speaker 02

  Committee got that one wrong.

• 1:50:31Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 1:50:32Speaker 02

  Next nominee for Still Alive Person of the Year, Jeffrey Epstein.

• 1:50:35Speaker 00

  Very much still alive.

• 1:50:36Speaker 02

  Very much still alive, yeah.

• 1:50:38Speaker 00

  Do your research.

• 1:50:39Speaker 02

  Next nominee, Still Alive Person of the Year, Lindsey Vonn. Congrats to Lindsey Vonn for still being alive. Remember, remember that?

• 1:50:48Speaker 00

  Yeah, she crashed.

• 1:50:49Speaker 02

  She tore ACL and then she said, I'm not gonna, I'm not done skiing.

• 1:50:53Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:50:53Speaker 02

  And then she crashed and everybody was like, yeah, well, you were skiing with a torn ACL.

• 1:50:57Speaker 00

  Yeah, probably a bad idea.

• 1:50:59Speaker 02

  Uh, next nominee for Still Alive Person of the Year is Pug.

• 1:51:01Speaker 00

  Yeah. How do we know he's still alive?

• 1:51:05Speaker 02

  Well, because he just won.

• 1:51:06Speaker 00

  We just, oh, he won, Pug, Still Alive Person of the Year.

• 1:51:11Speaker 02

  We love you, Pug.

• 1:51:11Speaker 00

  We love Pug.

• 1:51:13Speaker 04

  Are you guys trying to kill Pug?

• 1:51:14Speaker 02

  No, I don't know. Who, who decided that Pug was the winner?

• 1:51:16Speaker 00

  I don't know where that came from.

• 1:51:17Speaker 04

  Yo, how did Pug become the winner?

• 1:51:18Speaker 00

  Let's do that again. Let's give it to someone else.

• 1:51:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, because you guys feel like we're trying to kill Pug.

• 1:51:21Speaker 06

  Shane went rogue.

• 1:51:22Speaker 02

  Shane went rogue?

• 1:51:22Speaker 04

  Shane went rogue?

• 1:51:23Speaker 00

  I thought we were gonna give it a misrepair.

• 1:51:25Speaker 02

  Does Shane hate Pug?

• 1:51:25Speaker 06

  I think so.

• 1:51:26Speaker 02

  Oh, because the onion, because of the onion.

• 1:51:28Speaker 00

  Oh, all right, the real winner is.

• 1:51:32Speaker 02

  Shane.

• 1:51:32Speaker 00

  Shane.

• 1:51:34Speaker 02

  For Still Employed Person of the Year.

• 1:51:39Speaker 02

  Uh, no, the real winner of Still Alive Person of the Year is, also nominated was Jerry Jones. I forgot to nominate Jerry Jones.

• 1:51:46Speaker 00

  Yeah, Jerry Jones nominated.

• 1:51:47Speaker 02

  Uh, the winner of the Still Alive Person of the Year.

• 1:51:49Speaker 00

  This isn't a perfect, uh, award show, people. You know that.

• 1:51:52Speaker 02

  It's not. Somebody, somebody did go rogue and put Pug in there.

• 1:51:55Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:51:56Speaker 02

  The winner is Jerry Jones.

• 1:51:58Speaker 00

  Oh, Jerry Jones, congratulations.

• 1:52:00Speaker 02

  Jerry Jones. Still doing it.

• 1:52:03Speaker 00

  Congratulations. Congratulations. All right. Uh, next up, we got Fight of the Year. Fight of the Year. Oh, yep. Shane is trying to now, as always, just try to cop out of it and just be like, oh, it wasn't my fault. Pug was on the dock when I was making graphics as the winner. Oh, maybe it was Dom. Trying to kill Pug.

• 1:52:21Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:52:22Speaker 00

  Okay. Fight of the Year. We got some good fights this year. We have the Knicks twerking fan fight when the member, if you remember the, at the parade, the lady pulled her pants down and then she just tossed her off a light post. We have the Dennis Rodman Spurs fan who is from Philly.

• 1:52:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:52:38Speaker 00

  Who just put on a Spurs jersey and said, I'm gonna go fuck up some, you know, people.

• 1:52:44Speaker 02

  All due respect to that guy.

• 1:52:45Speaker 00

  Yeah. All due respect. We have Hank versus Big Dom at the NFL Combine.

• 1:52:48Speaker 02

  Great fight. Max, you remember seeing that fight?

• 1:52:50Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:52:51Speaker 02

  No, you, you ran away.

• 1:52:52Speaker 00

  You pussy. Yeah. Uh, we have Conor McGregor for those 15 seconds. 15 seconds. Uh, then we have a couple of Barstool ones. Uh, Kelly Keegs versus Sam Goldfinger, Fight of the Year at Barstool's Spring Break House. And then finally, Ben Mintz versus Crutches. Uh, it's an ongoing fight.

• 1:53:12Speaker 02

  No, Crutches wins by submission.

• 1:53:14Speaker 00

  Yeah. All right. The winner for Fight of the Year is Hank and Big Dom.

• 1:53:20Speaker 03

  Oh, wow.

• 1:53:22Speaker 00

  Fight Hank, would you like to accept?

• 1:53:24Speaker 03

  Yeah, I'd like to thank, I'd like to accept. I'd like to thank you guys, my partners, uh, for giving me this award.

• 1:53:30Speaker 02

  I don't like the way you said that.

• 1:53:31Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 1:53:32Speaker 03

  And, and Big Dom's a worthy adversary. I think, I think we squash the beef at the end of it, but sometimes you gotta, you know, chuck nucks and then come out stronger on the other side.

• 1:53:40Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:53:41Speaker 02

  Okay. Good point. Good point. Max, would you like to accept on behalf of Big Dom?

• 1:53:45Speaker 04

  Uh, no, that's Big Dom's award. Uh, I can't accept on his behalf.

• 1:53:49Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:53:49Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 1:53:52Speaker 02

  Next, next category in the 2026 Takeys, the Just Chill Out of the Year. A lot of people need to chill out this year.

• 1:53:58Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:53:59Speaker 02

  First nominee is Max.

• 1:54:01Speaker 00

  Mmm.

• 1:54:02Speaker 02

  For, uh, screaming at Meek Phil in the gambling cave.

• 1:54:04Speaker 00

  Uh, one of my favorite moments.

• 1:54:05Speaker 02

  That was a great moment by Max.

• 1:54:06Speaker 00

  Season.

• 1:54:07Speaker 02

  Got really in his face. Um, next.

• 1:54:10Speaker 00

  Max, what?

• 1:54:11Speaker 02

  What's up?

• 1:54:11Speaker 04

  I did need to, that, that.

• 1:54:13Speaker 02

  It's just chill out.

• 1:54:14Speaker 00

  Just chill out, dude.

• 1:54:15Speaker 02

  We're not, we're not saying anything big. It's just like, hey, maybe chill out.

• 1:54:17Speaker 04

  Yeah, that, that, yeah.

• 1:54:18Speaker 02

  Maybe, yeah, chill out, man.

• 1:54:19Speaker 00

  Just chill out.

• 1:54:20Speaker 04

  I had, yeah, chill out.

• 1:54:21Speaker 02

  Take a chill pill.

• 1:54:22Speaker 04

  Chill out.

• 1:54:23Speaker 02

  Next nominee for just chill out of the year is Max for slapping Hank.

• 1:54:26Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 1:54:27Speaker 04

  Well, that was.

• 1:54:29Speaker 00

  Chill out Hank, every Max.

• 1:54:30Speaker 04

  I was instructed to do that.

• 1:54:32Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:54:33Speaker 00

  But just chill.

• 1:54:34Speaker 03

  Still, yeah, you could be instructed to murder someone that's still murder.

• 1:54:36Speaker 02

  Good point. What do they say to that when they do crimes against humanity and, uh, and the Nuremberg trials? Just following orders.

• 1:54:45Speaker 00

  Just following orders.

• 1:54:45Speaker 04

  I was, I was just following orders.

• 1:54:47Speaker 00

  There's very, there's, there's many good Maxes.

• 1:54:49Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:54:50Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:54:51Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm. Uh, the next nominee for just chill out of the year is Mark Sanchez.

• 1:54:55Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:54:55Speaker 02

  Just chill out, man.

• 1:54:56Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:54:57Speaker 02

  Just chill out.

• 1:54:57Speaker 00

  He, he had to chill out.

• 1:54:58Speaker 02

  I think he chilled out. He might've gotten the message.

• 1:55:01Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:55:01Speaker 02

  I think he chilled. Next nominee is Ryan Clark, uh, for going at Pete Schreger.

• 1:55:07Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:55:07Speaker 02

  On the air. Just chill out, just chill out.

• 1:55:09Speaker 00

  That was a big time chill out.

• 1:55:11Speaker 02

  Not that serious, Ryan. And next nominee for just chill out of the year, uh, Pat McAfee for releasing an album.

• 1:55:17Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 1:55:18Speaker 02

  I guess, yeah, it's not super chill timing on the album.

• 1:55:22Speaker 00

  I'm still gonna listen.

• 1:55:23Speaker 02

  Chill out.

• 1:55:23Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:55:24Speaker 02

  Next nominee for chill out of the year is Max for when he, uh, ran to the kitchen, grabbed a knife, and then proceeded to stab all of our inflatable animals.

• 1:55:35Speaker 00

  Our positivity rabbit.

• 1:55:37Speaker 02

  Trying to make him feel better after the Eagles lost and.

• 1:55:39Speaker 04

  You, you weren't trying to make me feel better.

• 1:55:41Speaker 02

  We were trying to make you feel better.

• 1:55:42Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:55:43Speaker 02

  That's, that's a lie.

• 1:55:44Speaker 00

  It's a positivity rabbit, dude.

• 1:55:45Speaker 02

  That's a fucking lie, Max.

• 1:55:45Speaker 00

  I don't think you understand what a positivity rabbit is.

• 1:55:50Speaker 02

  You still don't.

• 1:55:51Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 1:55:51Speaker 03

  Is that it?

• 1:55:52Speaker 00

  Uh, yeah.

• 1:55:53Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:55:54Speaker 03

  I, I got into addition.

• 1:55:55Speaker 00

  Oh, okay, please.

• 1:55:56Speaker 03

  Uh, Max.

• 1:55:57Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 1:55:58Speaker 03

  For, uh, losing a game to the Broncos, hitting me again and taking my phone and throwing it across the room.

• 1:56:04Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:56:04Speaker 03

  Screaming in my face.

• 1:56:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:56:06Speaker 04

  Also, when the, yeah.

• 1:56:08Speaker 00

  You weren't here, I, did you hear on Friday?

• 1:56:11Speaker 02

  That was Hank the acupuncturist right there, just being like, the Dodington Bones.

• 1:56:14Speaker 00

  I found A.J. Brown signed his like locker room like placard after that game and I almost won the auction. I don't know what happened. I would've, oh, it would've been great. It was the Dodington Bones game.

• 1:56:25Speaker 02

  Hmm. That'd have been all the time.

• 1:56:27Speaker 00

  A combo of A.J. Brown and Dodington Bones. I was thinking out for you, Hank.

• 1:56:31Speaker 03

  I would love that.

• 1:56:32Speaker 00

  We're trying to find it.

• 1:56:33Speaker 04

  Uh, next year I'm gonna be chill.

• 1:56:34Speaker 00

  No.

• 1:56:36Speaker 02

  Uh, the winner of the just chill out man award.

• 1:56:39Speaker 00

  Is Max.

• 1:56:40Speaker 02

  Max. You had a

• 1:56:42Speaker 00

  All of them.

• 1:56:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, lifetime achievement award and needing to chill out.

• 1:56:45Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:56:46Speaker 04

  Yeah, I do need to chill out. This one, this one I will accept and I will, it's correct.

• 1:56:51Speaker 00

  You're not trying to go back to back.

• 1:56:53Speaker 04

  Although the Mark Sanchez one's probably worse.

• 1:56:55Speaker 00

  Yeah, probably.

• 1:56:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, maybe. Who's to say?

• 1:56:58Speaker 00

  Probably. Okay, our next award is dildo toss of the year. We had a great year for dildo tossing. We had a big, yeah, just a lot of dildo tosses. So our nominees are the WNBA dildo tosser on July 29, 2025, the Atlanta Dream and Golden State Valkyries game. WNBA thrower number two, August 1st, also Golden State Valkyries versus Chicago Sky. And then WNBA thrower number three, August 3rd, 2025, the Fever versus Sparks. Zach, you got us a cameo for this.

• 1:57:34Speaker 05

  Yes, sir.

• 1:57:34Speaker 00

  All right. What up? It's Bam Margera and the winner of the 2026 Takey for the Dildo Toss of the Year goes to the second dildo toss at the WNBA game. Congratulations. All right, Bam.

• 1:57:49Speaker 02

  Thanks Bam. Looking good.

• 1:57:52Speaker 00

  Oh, he looks great.

• 1:57:53Speaker 02

  Yeah. Can't wait for Jackass.

• 1:57:55Speaker 00

  I

• 1:57:56Speaker 02

  Is he in Jackass?

• 1:57:57Speaker 00

  Yeah, no.

• 1:57:57Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 1:57:58Speaker 00

  Uh, Zach, great get.

• 1:58:01Speaker 05

  I figured there was nobody else to get for that one.

• 1:58:03Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:58:04Speaker 05

  He fell with the 1-1.

• 1:58:05Speaker 00

  No, that was a great, great get. Okay, we got five left or a few left, a few left. The next category is the apology of the year. Apology of the year nominees, Luke Kwan for his nine-minute-long YouTube video that he posted apologizing for sleeping in where I don't think he said that he was sorry or apologized. But it was nine minutes and there was a lot of things that he said on it.

• 1:58:29Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:58:30Speaker 00

  The next nominee for apology of the year, Ryan Clark, for apologizing for the things that he said to Peter Schreger regarding you do not play football, you don't have an opinion.

• 1:58:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:58:39Speaker 00

  Uh, the next nominee for apology of the year, Bijon Robinson. Bijon Robinson for saying, uh, in a post-game interview, it's like when we played smear the queer as a kid.

• 1:58:50Speaker 02

  Uh, the next nominee for apology of the year. It would be, uh, the YGT and Michael Block drama.

• 1:58:57Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 1:58:57Speaker 02

  Where it was the Brian Brothers and Grant Horvath that put in. A clip from Michael Block that they probably shouldn't have put in. Did I get that right?

• 1:59:05Speaker 00

  No, no, it was actually a totally normal.

• 1:59:07Speaker 03

  It was a nothing clip.

• 1:59:08Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:59:08Speaker 03

  And then they released a long statement apologizing.

• 1:59:12Speaker 00

  Sorry.

• 1:59:12Speaker 03

  For including this clip.

• 1:59:14Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:59:14Speaker 02

  God.

• 1:59:15Speaker 00

  It was just basically Michael Block having a bad, uh, round of golf, missing a putt and then being upset about it, which is a totally normal thing.

• 1:59:22Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:59:23Speaker 00

  And then they apologized and said, we like to just only be positivity. Uh, we don't like to spread that type of negativity.

• 1:59:30Speaker 02

  Okay. Drum roll, please.

• 1:59:31Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 1:59:34Speaker 02

  I'm going to give it to YGT and Michael Block.

• 1:59:36Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 1:59:37Speaker 02

  Yeah. The nothing burger apology is, is always very funny.

• 1:59:41Speaker 00

  It's so funny. Cause it also was like, I, everyone did the same thing where I was like, what, what, what are they apologizing for? And then I watched it. I was like, wait, what are they apologizing?

• 1:59:50Speaker 02

  What I've learned is that a lot of people that are in the YouTube golf community are, are very sensitive individuals.

• 1:59:55Speaker 00

  I don't understand, uh, how people play golf and don't bust each other's balls.

• 2:00:04Speaker 02

  I mean, don't bust balls. Also, don't you fucking take a picture in their backswing?

• 2:00:08Speaker 00

  No.

• 2:00:09Speaker 03

  Would you not want to garnish attention through drama controversy, but through high quality golf?

• 2:00:13Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah. I know a place where you can see a lot of high quality golf.

• 2:00:16Speaker 03

  We are thankful for everyone's commitment and participation on the YGT and they deserve to be portrayed in a more positive light.

• 2:00:23Speaker 00

  So they're just all rainbows and gumdrops.

• 2:00:26Speaker 02

  It's kumbaya.

• 2:00:26Speaker 03

  They were like, hey, Michael Block's competed and he's mic'd up. And then we put in a clip of him being upset. From the competition.

• 2:00:34Speaker 00

  Totally normal.

• 2:00:35Speaker 03

  While he's still mic'd up.

• 2:00:36Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:00:36Speaker 00

  Right.

• 2:00:37Speaker 03

  Which is what he signed up for.

• 2:00:38Speaker 00

  Correct. And also what people want to see, the human interactions, the real human interactions, not the like, oh, good shot, good shot.

• 2:00:46Speaker 02

  Now Hank, do you see why maybe people don't want us to be kumbaya?

• 2:00:51Speaker 00

  Do you guys ever think about that?

• 2:00:51Speaker 03

  You guys are the kumbaya.

• 2:00:52Speaker 00

  What have we ever? What?

• 2:00:53Speaker 02

  You're kumbaya. You started kumbaya.

• 2:00:55Speaker 00

  We, what, what do you mean, we're the kumbaya?

• 2:00:58Speaker 03

  No, I made a statement, then you guys were, whoa, whoa, I thought we were gonna be kumbaya.

• 2:01:01Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 2:01:02Speaker 03

  Uh, you guys wanted to be kumbaya.

• 2:01:04Speaker 02

  You wanted to be kumbaya.

• 2:01:05Speaker 00

  No, we said we wanted to be kumbaya at the beginning of the Mount Rushmore, because you have a long Mount Rushmore.

• 2:01:10Speaker 03

  Right.

• 2:01:10Speaker 00

  You were no longer at the beginning.

• 2:01:11Speaker 03

  Okay, but for the record, you guys wanted kumbaya.

• 2:01:15Speaker 00

  No, I said we could kumbaya. No, I think.

• 2:01:17Speaker 02

  I never wanted.

• 2:01:17Speaker 00

  I actually think you said it first.

• 2:01:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, Hank did say it first, yes. Hank's gaslighting us right now.

• 2:01:22Speaker 00

  I think you are gaslighting us. Can someone help? And they get, help, help?

• 2:01:28Speaker 04

  I don't, I don't.

• 2:01:29Speaker 00

  Help, help?

• 2:01:30Speaker 04

  I have no opinion on this matter.

• 2:01:33Speaker 03

  It's not an opinion, it's, it's just a, a memory.

• 2:01:36Speaker 00

  He wasn't listening.

• 2:01:37Speaker 04

  I have no.

• 2:01:38Speaker 00

  He wasn't listening. He wasn't listening.

• 2:01:40Speaker 04

  I was listening. It's who's, who was the kumbaya?

• 2:01:42Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:01:43Speaker 04

  No one's kumbaya. I don't know.

• 2:01:46Speaker 00

  Chill out, Max. Could you imagine if this podcast was kumbaya? Like, if we did it like these guys?

• 2:01:51Speaker 04

  Show would suck.

• 2:01:51Speaker 00

  YouTube channel.

• 2:01:53Speaker 03

  What do you guys want?

• 2:01:53Speaker 02

  Yeah, do a kumbaya.

• 2:01:54Speaker 00

  No, it's not. You stop gaslighting us, you fucker. I swear to God, you said kumbaya.

• 2:02:00Speaker 02

  Hank came up with kumbaya.

• 2:02:02Speaker 00

  Shane, find us this clip.

• 2:02:04Speaker 03

  I know.

• 2:02:04Speaker 00

  You might be gaslighting us.

• 2:02:05Speaker 03

  No, never.

• 2:02:07Speaker 00

  I also might have misremembered.

• 2:02:08Speaker 02

  No, I think.

• 2:02:09Speaker 03

  What's a PFT just remembers how he wants and then says, this is what I said?

• 2:02:13Speaker 04

  I wasn't fully.

• 2:02:14Speaker 02

  I'm pretty sure that Hank said it first.

• 2:02:17Speaker 00

  Oh, man. All right. Next up, we have fart of the year.

• 2:02:22Speaker 03

  Oh, great.

• 2:02:23Speaker 00

  Who could potentially win this one? The nominees are Chuck Schumer.

• 2:02:27Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, it's a good fart.

• 2:02:28Speaker 00

  Good fart, good fart. Um, Scotty Scheffler at the open in 2025, when he farted when he was swinging.

• 2:02:35Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 2:02:36Speaker 00

  And he admitted to it to us on our show.

• 2:02:38Speaker 03

  Iconic.

• 2:02:39Speaker 00

  Um.

• 2:02:40Speaker 03

  Big clip.

• 2:02:40Speaker 00

  The Noah, the Noah Khan fan, who, that wasn't really a fart, that was just poop.

• 2:02:44Speaker 02

  And some, they shat themselves and they kind of like stepped on it.

• 2:02:47Speaker 00

  That was a full blown fart.

• 2:02:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:02:48Speaker 00

  Yeah. And then, uh, finally, Henry Lockwood for his fart at the New Orleans Saints facility, which is right next to the Pelicans facility.

• 2:02:58Speaker 02

  True.

• 2:03:00Speaker 03

  Fart asterisk.

• 2:03:01Speaker 00

  During our Kellen Moore interview.

• 2:03:02Speaker 02

  And also.

• 2:03:03Speaker 03

  Fartish.

• 2:03:04Speaker 02

  The chair was very solid. It was a solid chair.

• 2:03:06Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:03:06Speaker 03

  And circular.

• 2:03:07Speaker 02

  A circular chair, yeah.

• 2:03:09Speaker 03

  Sitting on an amp.

• 2:03:09Speaker 02

  Well, yeah, I might have another late nominee.

• 2:03:11Speaker 00

  Okay. Oh, got it. Oh, oh, this is a cool.

• 2:03:15Speaker 04

  That was wet. That was wet. That was shit.

• 2:03:19Speaker 00

  You gotta wipe your butt. You gotta wipe your butt.

• 2:03:21Speaker 02

  It was a little wet.

• 2:03:22Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:03:23Speaker 04

  You can give yourself a pink eye.

• 2:03:27Speaker 00

  Uh, okay. The winner for fart of the year is Henry Lockwood.

• 2:03:35Speaker 03

  I'm raking it in this year. All those losses, I'm, I feel like I'm sitting here.

• 2:03:40Speaker 00

  It's, we're trying to gas our guy up.

• 2:03:42Speaker 03

  I have like.

• 2:03:42Speaker 00

  You asked us, you kumbaya, we're doing it.

• 2:03:44Speaker 03

  Five takeys, I did not. Uh, but I would like to thank the committee. I think the Scotty Scheffler probably deserved it. Uh, bigger clip, bigger, bigger profile. But I'll take it. I'll take any award I can get. It was a lot of loss this year and, and I'm just gonna keep stacking little win after little win. That's how you end up getting big win after big one.

• 2:04:02Speaker 00

  Yeah. Yeah. I like that. Good job, Hank.

• 2:04:04Speaker 02

  Good job.

• 2:04:04Speaker 03

  And I'll just, I'll keep farting.

• 2:04:06Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:04:06Speaker 02

  Not gonna stop?

• 2:04:07Speaker 03

  Never stop farting.

• 2:04:08Speaker 00

  Never stop.

• 2:04:08Speaker 02

  Not retiring?

• 2:04:09Speaker 03

  No.

• 2:04:09Speaker 00

  You got one more in you. Vince Carter.

• 2:04:11Speaker 03

  I got a lot more in me.

• 2:04:13Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 2:04:14Speaker 02

  Uh, next category is the retirement of the year.

• 2:04:16Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 2:04:17Speaker 02

  The nominees for retirement of the year are the Meow Mix Podcast.

• 2:04:21Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 2:04:22Speaker 02

  For walking away from covering the Carolina Panthers and then afterwards the Panthers go on a win streak. And then they came back later on the season, but it was all good vibes from them.

• 2:04:30Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 2:04:30Speaker 02

  Next nominee is Lee Corso. Walked away from college football. It was actually a cool way that he went out because it was the first game that he did on college football, on college game day.

• 2:04:38Speaker 00

  Agreed.

• 2:04:39Speaker 02

  Uh, the next nominee for retirement of the year, Mike Frabel for retiring for a day during the NFL draft.

• 2:04:45Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 2:04:45Speaker 02

  And then, uh, coming back.

• 2:04:47Speaker 03

  Didn't retire.

• 2:04:48Speaker 02

  Uh, the next nominee for retirement of the year is Ralphie the Buffalo. At Colorado, just had no interest in running anymore.

• 2:04:55Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 2:04:55Speaker 02

  So they had to send Ralphie to greener pastures. Shout out Ralphie. We all understand what you're going through. Very relatable. The final nominee for retirement of the year is Philip Rivers for retiring from football again after he came back. That was awesome that Philip Rivers came back. I can't believe, I still can't believe that it happened.

• 2:05:12Speaker 00

  That was so sad.

• 2:05:12Speaker 02

  Shout out for the Colts to even like ask the question.

• 2:05:15Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 2:05:15Speaker 02

  And shout out Phil.

• 2:05:16Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 2:05:17Speaker 02

  Um, the winner of retirement of the year is.

• 2:05:27Speaker 02

  The Meow Mix Podcast. Yeah. Congratulations to Meow Mix and we have a video from. Yes.

• 2:05:32Speaker 05

  Hello everyone. It's Steven and Jerry, formerly of the Meow Mix Carolina Panthers Podcast.

• 2:05:37Speaker 07

  And we want to graciously accept this takey award from Pardon My Take for the best retirement of last year. We surprisingly earned it. Maybe.

• 2:05:48Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah. Lots of nominees out there, lots of people who retired, but they recognized us and who do we have to thank for this? I mean, I want to thank David Tepper for putting an incredible product out on the field week after week.

• 2:06:02Speaker 07

  Yeah, I mean.

• 2:06:03Speaker 05

  I should say the turf, right? Not the field. Frank Reich, let's thank Scott Fitterer, your favorite coach, Matt Ruhl.

• 2:06:11Speaker 07

  Oh, Matt Ruhl, yeah.

• 2:06:12Speaker 05

  So many luminaries helped us get to this point, Jerry.

• 2:06:15Speaker 07

  Yeah, Baker Mayfield, you know, horrible, horrible hair and now it gets to us, you know? But when we started this, we wanted to become one of the best podcasts or most popular Carolina Panthers podcast there was. And unfortunately, it just happened the day after we retired.

• 2:06:37Speaker 05

  Yes. What major news that was picked up nationally, a small Carolina Panthers podcast retires and you know, maybe, yeah, the, the message might've been a little melodramatic, but uh, yeah, I don't know. The whole thing was a whirlwind. But seriously, to Pardon My Take, you guys were amazing. You guys seemed to get it, like you understood, you're real fans. You know, of your teams and, and you know how it feels to be in pain and we were in massive pain for a long time. As Panthers fans, then we stopped doing it and the Panthers go on a run. I don't want to say jinx, Jerry. But we're not going to be recording anymore just to be on the safe side.

• 2:07:21Speaker 07

  Yeah, I tried, but it's, it's not fun without you, man. So overall, we want to thank every listener again that listened to us and stuff. Thank you, Pardon My Take.

• 2:07:31Speaker 00

  Keep pounding. Shout out to Meow Mix guys. Uh, they gotta win retirement of the year because like they, you know, they were podcasting through some really bleak times.

• 2:07:41Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:07:42Speaker 00

  Retired and the Panthers got good.

• 2:07:44Speaker 02

  And then they got good. Yeah. So good, good for them.

• 2:07:46Speaker 00

  Yeah. Great job.

• 2:07:47Speaker 02

  Season to remember.

• 2:07:48Speaker 00

  Um, okay. Next up, we have new category tits of the year tits of the year. So the nominees are myself. I've actually been feeling pretty flabby. I have to do some pushups. Haven't done pushups in a while.

• 2:08:04Speaker 02

  But still big rack.

• 2:08:05Speaker 00

  They are, they're, they're voluptuous right now. I just caught myself in the mirror the other day. I was like, damn dude, you're stacked. Uh, memes memes is nominated for tits of the year. His iconic picture.

• 2:08:20Speaker 02

  Great picture memes.

• 2:08:21Speaker 00

  At the, uh, Shore Acres Golf Course. Max, you are nominated for tits of the year. Good job, Max. And then finally Sydney Sweeney. Great tits.

• 2:08:31Speaker 02

  Great tits.

• 2:08:32Speaker 00

  Great tits.

• 2:08:33Speaker 02

  All around. Great nominees.

• 2:08:34Speaker 00

  Yeah. All right. Here we go. We have, oh, here we go. Let's see who's presenting these awards, this award.

• 2:08:42Speaker 07

  Hello friends. It's me Nancy Pelosi here to present the tits of the year award. Congrats to memes. My friend, you have absolute cannons and much like my stock portfolio, they're pointing in the right direction. Memes, are you good at keeping secrets? Because I wouldn't mind being kept close to your chest, big man.

• 2:09:01Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 2:09:02Speaker 00

  Memes, congratulations.

• 2:09:03Speaker 02

  Congrats memes.

• 2:09:04Speaker 00

  Have you ever won a takey?

• 2:09:05Speaker 06

  This is my first takey. This is a huge honor. Uh, just another win.

• 2:09:10Speaker 00

  Yup.

• 2:09:12Speaker 06

  Yeah, blown him if he got him.

• 2:09:14Speaker 00

  Are you still mad at me?

• 2:09:15Speaker 06

  No, I got tits.

• 2:09:17Speaker 00

  You were mad at me?

• 2:09:18Speaker 06

  No, no, it was a fine photo.

• 2:09:20Speaker 00

  Then you came, the next time we played golf, you had like six layers on, like 80 degrees.

• 2:09:25Speaker 06

  Yeah, I'll probably wear a sweatshirt Monday when we film this video.

• 2:09:28Speaker 02

  Memes, have you, uh, you, you like hit the gym? Make, make any changes?

• 2:09:31Speaker 00

  No dude, he just said he layered.

• 2:09:33Speaker 06

  Yeah, just layered.

• 2:09:34Speaker 00

  Yeah, you don't have to go to the gym. You just gotta wear a sweatshirt.

• 2:09:36Speaker 02

  Spanx maybe.

• 2:09:37Speaker 00

  It's pretty easy. Yeah. As soon as summer's over, it's fine. I don't care about my tits. It's when I have to wear a t-shirt. It's like, it's just torture. Okay. Um, we got a couple left. What do we got next, PFT?

• 2:09:51Speaker 02

  Uh, this is the book of the year.

• 2:09:52Speaker 00

  Ooh.

• 2:09:53Speaker 02

  Hey. The book of the year award. Uh, the first nominee for a book of the year is Pardon My Book. By Big Cat and PFT Compteur.

• 2:10:02Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 2:10:03Speaker 02

  And Hank and memes and Max and Zach.

• 2:10:05Speaker 00

  And Shane.

• 2:10:06Speaker 02

  And Shane and a lot of other people that were guests on Pardon My Take over the years.

• 2:10:09Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 2:10:10Speaker 02

  Uh, the next nominee for book of the year is Cancel Me If You Can, Dave's book.

• 2:10:15Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 2:10:16Speaker 02

  New York Times number one bestseller.

• 2:10:17Speaker 00

  No big deal.

• 2:10:18Speaker 02

  Next nominee for book of the year, Daddy Issues by Sophia Franklin. That's Sophia with an F.

• 2:10:23Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 2:10:24Speaker 02

  Check her out online.

• 2:10:24Speaker 00

  That's a good one.

• 2:10:25Speaker 02

  Um, and the winner of the book of the year award is.

• 2:10:34Speaker 02

  Pardon My Book.

• 2:10:35Speaker 00

  Oh, congrats us.

• 2:10:37Speaker 02

  And the book's not even out yet, but it's just that damn good, uh, that it's already won. It's gonna be out on August 18th and we just got our first copies today. The first official copies of the book arrived to the office. I, um, I gotta be honest with you. I, I did not expect to be a little emotional when I got the book.

• 2:10:54Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:10:55Speaker 02

  Because I was looking through the pictures that Hank put in the middle of, uh, of, you know, some of the rare photos from the last 10 years, a lot of them going back to like 2016, 2017. And, um, it was pretty cool to look back on. So, uh, hope you guys like it. It was a labor of love doing it. It was a lot of work, uh, but we liked, we enjoyed it and, uh, we hope that you guys like reading it too.

• 2:11:15Speaker 00

  And, uh, we promised, listen, when we get to the week of the book launch, we're gonna have to talk about a lot because we wanna be also New York Times bestseller.

• 2:11:24Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 2:11:25Speaker 00

  Uh, maybe one as well. We need the A W Ls to help us out in that. We do think it's a very, very good book, The History of Pardon My Take. Um, we're gonna be signing a bunch of copies. The first signed copies, uh, are now available though on, uh, AndersonBookshop.com. So go get it. Uh, customers need to preorder there before August 17th. And the book with signed sticker inside it is shipped directly to the customer to arrive the week the book goes on sale. So AndersonBookshop.com, search for Pardon My Book. And again, it comes out August 18th, so let's gear up. It's, it, it is, I, I really think people are gonna very much enjoy it because we have a bunch of our friends talk about it in ways that we, you know, we never really like sat back and been like, hey, that was crazy 10 years.

• 2:12:08Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 2:12:09Speaker 00

  And we're gonna keep going.

• 2:12:10Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 2:12:11Speaker 00

  Keep going. All right, next up we have, uh, the call to the president of the year. This is a new award.

• 2:12:17Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:12:19Speaker 00

  It because it was a stacked stacked year for calls to the president. We have first up. We have Bryson DeChambeau threatening to call the president.

• 2:12:28Speaker 02

  Mm hmm.

• 2:12:28Speaker 00

  Threatening to call the president because of a penalty at the open championship. We then have Tiger Woods, just just on the phone with the president.

• 2:12:37Speaker 02

  Just got off the phone with the president. Sorry. I was just talking to the president.

• 2:12:39Speaker 00

  Yep. We have the call the president made to the US men's hockey team that started a complete shitstorm.

• 2:12:46Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 2:12:47Speaker 00

  For no reason. And then we have the call that the president made to FIFA to get Balogun's red card rescinded.

• 2:12:54Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:12:55Speaker 00

  So big, big year.

• 2:12:56Speaker 02

  Huge year.

• 2:12:57Speaker 00

  DT was on the phone a lot.

• 2:12:58Speaker 02

  He was, yeah, get those minutes.

• 2:13:00Speaker 00

  Yeah. Okay. The winner for call to the president of the year is Tiger Woods.

• 2:13:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:13:08Speaker 00

  Just without a doubt, just just got off the phone with the president.

• 2:13:10Speaker 02

  So just talking to the president.

• 2:13:11Speaker 00

  All time, all timeline.

• 2:13:14Speaker 02

  And it was shocking, not just because like you don't expect him to say that, but also I know that when he's driving, that's where he usually goes to be alone.

• 2:13:20Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:13:21Speaker 02

  And that's where he goes to feel normal and you wouldn't expect him to be talking to the president. And that's exactly what he was doing.

• 2:13:25Speaker 00

  He was talking to the president.

• 2:13:25Speaker 02

  Talking to the president.

• 2:13:26Speaker 00

  He's talking to the president.

• 2:13:27Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:13:27Speaker 00

  He's got full president. He's talking to the president.

• 2:13:29Speaker 02

  We think Hank.

• 2:13:30Speaker 03

  I mean, Jerry's got that in his bag now. It's exciting.

• 2:13:33Speaker 02

  That's a good point. Yeah. He could be nominated next year.

• 2:13:36Speaker 00

  True.

• 2:13:36Speaker 02

  Called the, just talking to the president.

• 2:13:38Speaker 00

  Start the president.

• 2:13:39Speaker 02

  Uh, okay. This is a crazy category. The preemptive take of the year.

• 2:13:44Speaker 00

  We do this every year.

• 2:13:45Speaker 02

  Yeah. Uh, last year, I'm trying to remember what the takes were.

• 2:13:48Speaker 00

  I don't remember.

• 2:13:49Speaker 02

  I think mine might've been that Paige Becker's is going to be better than Kaitlyn Clark.

• 2:13:55Speaker 00

  Okay. So you're just.

• 2:13:56Speaker 02

  By this time next year.

• 2:13:57Speaker 00

  Taking credit for being right.

• 2:13:58Speaker 02

  I think I'm taking credit for being correct.

• 2:14:00Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:14:01Speaker 02

  On my preemptive take.

• 2:14:01Speaker 00

  Yeah. I don't remember, but let's hit it. Let's, let's, let's rip them. Hank preemptive take of the year.

• 2:14:06Speaker 03

  Uh, my preemptive take of the year is that the, there's going to be a new women's basketball league. The WNBA is going to split up.

• 2:14:12Speaker 02

  Oh, okay.

• 2:14:14Speaker 03

  And a new league is going to form.

• 2:14:16Speaker 02

  Okay. All right. How are they going to split up?

• 2:14:20Speaker 03

  Players are going to leave.

• 2:14:22Speaker 02

  Is the WNBA going to stick around?

• 2:14:24Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 2:14:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:14:28Speaker 05

  That's my take.

• 2:14:28Speaker 00

  Okay. Memes?

• 2:14:30Speaker 06

  I've been right two years in a row.

• 2:14:32Speaker 00

  What?

• 2:14:33Speaker 06

  Yeah, I just pick one of your teams to do bad.

• 2:14:36Speaker 00

  What did you pick last year?

• 2:14:37Speaker 06

  Last year was the commanders said they were gonna implode, which they did.

• 2:14:39Speaker 00

  Year before?

• 2:14:40Speaker 06

  Uh, the Joe, the Paul George trade wasn't gonna work out and they were actually gonna be that bad because it's a super team of losers.

• 2:14:47Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 2:14:48Speaker 06

  Uh. This year I'm going.

• 2:14:52Speaker 00

  You gonna do it?

• 2:14:53Speaker 06

  Max gave me the hand.

• 2:14:54Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 2:14:55Speaker 04

  No, Hank gave me a look. I was like, that's, that's your loser now.

• 2:15:00Speaker 05

  I, I thought you were gonna argue that it did work out.

• 2:15:02Speaker 00

  Yeah, true.

• 2:15:03Speaker 04

  No, he said Paul George, so Hank gave me a look and I pointed, I pointed at him.

• 2:15:09Speaker 06

  The Cincinnati Bengals are gonna win the Super Bowl.

• 2:15:11Speaker 00

  Whoa.

• 2:15:13Speaker 06

  Okay.

• 2:15:13Speaker 00

  That's okay. All right. I like that.

• 2:15:16Speaker 06

  That's my take.

• 2:15:18Speaker 04

  Uh, my, is it my turn?

• 2:15:20Speaker 00

  Cincinnati Bengals to win the Super Bowl.

• 2:15:23Speaker 06

  Hmm.

• 2:15:24Speaker 00

  All right.

• 2:15:25Speaker 04

  My take is going to be that the Wizards are gonna make the playoffs.

• 2:15:31Speaker 00

  I love it.

• 2:15:31Speaker 04

  And they're gonna play the Celtics.

• 2:15:33Speaker 00

  Smart man. Oh.

• 2:15:34Speaker 04

  The, the pod is going to have a hell of a couple of weeks there.

• 2:15:38Speaker 00

  And Wizards are gonna probably have home court advantage.

• 2:15:41Speaker 04

  No.

• 2:15:42Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 2:15:43Speaker 05

  What seed were the Wizards gonna make the playoffs as?

• 2:15:45Speaker 04

  I think it's gonna be a two set, two, seven situation.

• 2:15:48Speaker 00

  I love it. I love it. Okay. Feed it to me.

• 2:15:51Speaker 05

  So we're gonna be back to the two seed?

• 2:15:54Speaker 00

  How'd that work out for you?

• 2:15:56Speaker 04

  Yeah, sure.

• 2:15:58Speaker 05

  I'll take it. I'll sign up for that.

• 2:15:59Speaker 00

  Yeah. Okay. Max is right.

• 2:16:01Speaker 04

  I just think, uh, there's been so much Wizard Celtics talk that I feel like it's.

• 2:16:06Speaker 00

  So much, so much.

• 2:16:06Speaker 04

  It's gonna, it's gonna end in Wizards Celtics.

• 2:16:09Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's just bubbling over everywhere. Two teams are circling each other.

• 2:16:13Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 2:16:15Speaker 00

  Destiny. Collision course. Zach, what do you got?

• 2:16:19Speaker 05

  Uh, I'm gonna go with, uh, we, we are gonna get Tiger Woods at the Masters in the, at the upcoming Masters.

• 2:16:25Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 2:16:25Speaker 05

  He's gonna play.

• 2:16:27Speaker 06

  Love that.

• 2:16:28Speaker 00

  By the way, Zach, this just dawned on me, the fact that I didn't nominate you for take of the year when you said, uh, I show speeds bigger than Donald Trump. That's my fault. That probably should have won.

• 2:16:37Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 2:16:38Speaker 05

  Yeah, it's a good take.

• 2:16:39Speaker 00

  All right, Tiger Woods, the Masters.

• 2:16:40Speaker 05

  Yeah, I believe so. I think he's gonna play. Not to say he's gonna win, but he's gonna play.

• 2:16:43Speaker 06

  Okay, would love to see that. Um, I think.

• 2:16:49Speaker 02

  Arch Manning is going to pull an Eli.

• 2:16:52Speaker 02

  Whatever team finishes with the worst record this year. Arch and his dad. And his grandfather are going to say, my boy's not playing there. He wants to go do a different organization.

• 2:17:05Speaker 02

  I'm not going to say what team is going to finish last.

• 2:17:07Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 2:17:07Speaker 02

  Cause I don't want to incur any wrath from anybody in this room or in the booth.

• 2:17:11Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 2:17:13Speaker 06

  Who are you talking about?

• 2:17:14Speaker 02

  Whatever team finishes with the number one.

• 2:17:16Speaker 06

  Why not the commanders?

• 2:17:18Speaker 02

  It could be me.

• 2:17:18Speaker 06

  Quarterbacks hurt all the time.

• 2:17:20Speaker 02

  Could be me. Not all the time.

• 2:17:21Speaker 06

  All the time. You watching a documentary?

• 2:17:23Speaker 02

  Missed a couple of games.

• 2:17:24Speaker 06

  Every game.

• 2:17:24Speaker 02

  But brother, I lived the documentary last year.

• 2:17:27Speaker 06

  No, you should watch it.

• 2:17:28Speaker 02

  I'm, I'm, I'm going to respectfully opt out of Jayden Daniels elbow content.

• 2:17:33Speaker 06

  No, more than elbow.

• 2:17:35Speaker 02

  But whatever team, I didn't say what team it was going to be. Whichever team finishes with the worst record.

• 2:17:39Speaker 06

  I'm just talking.

• 2:17:40Speaker 02

  I, same. Me too. Couple guys doing a podcast.

• 2:17:44Speaker 06

  Couple guys talking.

• 2:17:45Speaker 02

  Couple of guys doing a podcast.

• 2:17:46Speaker 00

  Piling up with the boys.

• 2:17:47Speaker 02

  And he's going to say, uh, no, I don't want to go to that dysfunctional organization. And, uh, they're going to pull a power play. That's what I think.

• 2:17:55Speaker 06

  And we're not naming, we're just not naming teams.

• 2:17:58Speaker 02

  We're not. That's exactly accurate description of what just happened. When it was two guys talking.

• 2:18:02Speaker 06

  Two guys talking.

• 2:18:03Speaker 00

  Two guys talking. Two guys talking.

• 2:18:05Speaker 02

  Could be the Cardinals.

• 2:18:06Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 2:18:06Speaker 02

  Could be.

• 2:18:06Speaker 00

  Actually, no, they've already got their quarterback, Jacoby.

• 2:18:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:18:09Speaker 00

  Well.

• 2:18:09Speaker 02

  We'll see.

• 2:18:10Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:18:12Speaker 00

  I have one, but can I just add on to yours, Zach? I think Phil's going to make the cut at the Masters this year. You like that?

• 2:18:19Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:18:19Speaker 00

  You like that?

• 2:18:20Speaker 02

  Like that a lot.

• 2:18:21Speaker 00

  My preemptive take of the year is that. There's going to be a controversy surrounding LeBron James. Wherever he goes and plays, he's going to have an injury and then he's going to be caught golfing. With that injury and everyone's going to be like, does he actually love the game anymore? He's going to be forced to retire.

• 2:18:38Speaker 02

  I like that a lot. Yeah. He'll never be forced to retire. I liked, I liked it up until that point though.

• 2:18:43Speaker 00

  Okay. So we'll take out the forced to retire. Kumbaya?

• 2:18:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:18:46Speaker 00

  Okay. You could see it happening though.

• 2:18:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:18:50Speaker 00

  Someone gets him and like, oh, I thought, dude, I thought you had a, a broken wrist or I thought, you know.

• 2:18:55Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 2:18:56Speaker 00

  Your hamstring. He's like, just can't quit golfing. Loves the golf. Okay, we have, uh, two awards left. Next up, one of our favorites. We have Blake of the year. Blake Griffin versus Blake Bortles versus Brooks Koepka. We taped it yesterday, so let's get to it. Okay, it is time for one of our favorite awards. Every single takeys, it is the Blake of the year award. We have Blake Griffin. The nominees are Blake Griffin, Blake Bortles and Brooks Koepka. And we've done it many different ways in the years past. I think we've perfected the, the, the best way to do it.

• 2:19:37Speaker 00

  And what we're going to do, I have alerted all three Blakes that there is a window. They had a two hour window that they could potentially be texted a zoom link, a link. And the first Blake to join the zoom is the Blake of the year. So the two, we are right now, an hour and 28 minutes into the window. And we're about to send them the link. So is everyone ready? Does anyone have a prediction?

• 2:20:07Speaker 02

  I'm ready. I, I'm feeling an upset today. I don't know why. I woke up this morning and I, I was thinking to myself, this is the year. Brooks Koepka becomes the first ever non-Blake to win Blake of the year, which would be important representation for everybody, every youngster out there that grows up not being named Blake, that you two one day could possibly be Blake of the year. I feel, I feel like it might happen this year.

• 2:20:30Speaker 00

  Okay, here we go. You, you boys ready?

• 2:20:33Speaker 02

  Ready.

• 2:20:34Speaker 03

  Come on, Brooksie.

• 2:20:36Speaker 00

  The text has been sent.

• 2:20:37Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 2:20:37Speaker 03

  Oh my God.

• 2:20:38Speaker 00

  You got. Text has been sent.

• 2:20:40Speaker 04

  I'm gonna say Bortles.

• 2:20:40Speaker 02

  You got this, bro.

• 2:20:41Speaker 00

  Text has been sent.

• 2:20:42Speaker 02

  I'd be happy with any Blake.

• 2:20:43Speaker 03

  Blake Griffin.

• 2:20:44Speaker 00

  Oh, oh, that was Blake.

• 2:20:48Speaker 02

  Who was first?

• 2:20:49Speaker 04

  That was, no, it was, it was.

• 2:20:51Speaker 02

  Who was first?

• 2:20:51Speaker 00

  I saw it. I saw it. Yes. I saw it. We can't see anyone.

• 2:20:57Speaker 00

  It was Had to be first. No, hold on.

• 2:21:00Speaker 04

  Well, he does have his, he does have his video on.

• 2:21:02Speaker 00

  He doesn't have his video on.

• 2:21:03Speaker 02

  Okay, that's fine, though.

• 2:21:04Speaker 00

  Hold on. Video done, Cal. We can't hear either of them. What's going on? I can hear you guys. Okay, there's Blake Griffin. There's Blake Portles. So here, here, wow.

• 2:21:13Speaker 02

  This was crazy.

• 2:21:15Speaker 00

  We got a little bit of an issue. By the way, What happened? Brooks will join whenever, uh. Brooks is not gonna join. Brooks is not gonna join. So we first saw Blake Griffin on the screen. Okay, thank you. No, what, but wait. But we have it screen recorded for which, which person joined, tried to join first.

• 2:21:40Speaker 00

  And Blake Portles, you are the 2026 Blake of the Year. Oh.

• 2:21:45Speaker 02

  Congratulations, Blake.

• 2:21:46Speaker 00

  Oh, it was

• 2:21:47Speaker 02

  There we go.

• 2:21:48Speaker 00

  A split second difference. We have the recording.

• 2:21:52Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 2:21:52Speaker 00

  Blake Portles, I mean, the floor is yours. What an upset. Uh, finally breaking up the dynasty. Good for the league. Blake, Blake Griffin is now muted. I don't know if he's yelling at himself. You muted yourself by accident. Good for the league. Parody is good for the league. We learned that. Blake Portles, you, you, you, you have just won Blake of the Year. What would you like to say? I mean, massive. Um, I hate that it came down to a bit of controversy there, but, um, you know, I just, it's been what? Three, four, five years in a row and, uh, it was bleak for a long time, but I'm happy we stuck to it and, uh, and here we are.

• 2:22:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean, it was, it was a photo finish. Quite literally a photo finish, sending you in over the top. Are you walking, are you pacing around your house right now? Are you, were you positioned close to the router?

• 2:22:38Speaker 00

  No, I'm in the hallway of our hotel and, uh, and I was five minutes away from just forfeiting because my family's waiting on me to catch a train to go to this Red Sox game.

• 2:22:47Speaker 02

  Oh, wow. Wow. And so you did this as an away game on the road, like with, with hotel wifi?

• 2:22:55Speaker 00

  On the road, hotel wifi. It is arguably better wifi than at my house.

• 2:22:59Speaker 02

  But it's nowhere near Blake's personal Starlink orbit he's got. Did you, did you pay for the extra fast service at the hotel? Not originally, but I did upgrade to it today. There you go. That's now that's thinking. That's, uh, that's the difference.

• 2:23:12Speaker 00

  What, what a performance. So, so Blake Griffin, uh, what's going through your head right now? Post game, um, what, what happened out there? Uh, I did everything I could. I, um, I don't know, prepared. Um, sometimes it just doesn't go your way. I, um, I'd like to see the tape. I, I will be putting a call into President Trump.

• 2:23:36Speaker 00

  See, uh, see if he could, see if we could, there's something we could possibly do. I don't know. Yeah, you're calling ABS on us.

• 2:23:43Speaker 02

  Or maybe just quit. Yeah. Just threaten to not play next year.

• 2:23:45Speaker 00

  Now, now PFT doesn't know what I'm about to say because he was, he was recording macrodosing, but, uh, let's walk through something that happened about, I don't know, 45 minutes ago. I told you guys, uh, on a text. So I had Blake Griffin, Blake Bortles, Brooks Koepka on a text. I told him, hey, look, the window opens right now. About, so, so then all of a sudden I looked down at my phone and there's a FaceTime from Brooks Koepka. Brooks start, cause he's never really fully competed in Blake of the year. He started his own FaceTime with the four of us and just kind of declared himself the winner.

• 2:24:21Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 2:24:22Speaker 00

  Yeah. He was like, we all weird, like, we all joined the FaceTime, like, who started this? And Brooks was just drinking at the bar and he's like, I did. He's like, did I win? Which is arguably one of the most Blake things to do.

• 2:24:34Speaker 02

  It is. Now, how soon after the text did he send that?

• 2:24:36Speaker 00

  That's the best part. A full five minutes.

• 2:24:42Speaker 00

  In his mind, he thought that that was the text being like, all right, whoever calls first, it's, it's, it's yours. And so he lost face. I get on and it's just me and him and he goes, did I win?

• 2:24:56Speaker 00

  And I'm looking at him like, wow, why are you the only one? I was so confused.

• 2:24:59Speaker 02

  I love that. He, he started his own tour for Blake's.

• 2:25:02Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:25:02Speaker 02

  The live tour of Blake's.

• 2:25:03Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:25:04Speaker 02

  Which he immediately won.

• 2:25:05Speaker 00

  Yeah. Oh, man. It was, uh, that's an incre- that's probably the closest it's ever been in terms of Blake of the year.

• 2:25:12Speaker 02

  And yeah.

• 2:25:13Speaker 00

  You have to agree Blake Griffin that it is good for the league. Like we need. It's. It's good for the league. It's good for the league. Blake, I'm happy for you. Um, I feel like when one Blake wins, we all win. Uh, rising tide raises all ships and, um, cheers to, cheers to you, man. You, you're, you're a formidable opponent. Yeah, it's, uh.

• 2:25:32Speaker 04

  Appreciate it. I was starting to feel like the, uh, who was it? Like the Jim Kelly eighties ba- or Bills.

• 2:25:38Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:25:38Speaker 04

  Just getting beat year after year.

• 2:25:40Speaker 00

  Yeah. And now you can enjoy a baseball game and with a new championship on your belt. A record breaker too.

• 2:25:47Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:25:48Speaker 04

  That's right. Going for 16 tonight. Go Sox.

• 2:25:50Speaker 00

  Yeah. Yeah. The Red Sox go for 16 and Blake Bortles is gonna go. Was that Hank that just chimed in there? Yeah.

• 2:25:58Speaker 00

  Hey, buddy. Oh, man. All right. Well, thank you, boys. This is one of our favorite awards. Um, Will, you guys can leave. We'll stay on for a couple of minutes. See if Brooks ever joins. Um, I'm guessing no. Uh, but. Yeah. He does. This is, uh, Brooks is now setting it up for like in 10 years from now, when he wins his first ever Blake of the year, it will be one of the most shot. It would be like the 1980, you know, US men's team. Like it will be one of the most shocking results ever.

• 2:26:24Speaker 02

  First time he plays in the States. I feel like he's gonna win.

• 2:26:26Speaker 00

  But he did, but he, he's just taking vacation right now.

• 2:26:30Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:26:30Speaker 00

  Everyone else is back. Yeah. So. I hope, I hope he's not playing cause he was not sober on that call.

• 2:26:38Speaker 04

  I knew the longer the call went on, the, the less chance Blake had of getting in.

• 2:26:43Speaker 02

  Yeah. He might go to bed tonight thinking that he won.

• 2:26:46Speaker 04

  Brooks, I mean.

• 2:26:46Speaker 02

  Yeah. And that's probably as good as an actual championship for himself. Like he might right now think he is current Blake of the year.

• 2:26:52Speaker 00

  Well, it was great sportsmanship because Blake Griffin immediately texted him and said, congrats. You won Brooks of the year, which he did. He won Brooks of the year. He was the first one to call it. Oh, man. All right. Well, thank you, boys. You guys are the best. All right. Congrats.

• 2:27:05Speaker 02

  Congrats Blake. Congrats Blake.

• 2:27:09Speaker 00

  Oh, now his wifi goes.

• 2:27:10Speaker 02

  Now his wifi, come on.

• 2:27:14Speaker 03

  See you guys.

• 2:27:14Speaker 00

  All right, see you guys. Later. All right. So now we see if Brooks is ever going to join.

• 2:27:19Speaker 02

  I saw it on the screen too. I will verify that that Blake Bortles joined the call slightly. I'm talking like a second before. That that might have been the closest margin that we've ever had on this.

• 2:27:29Speaker 00

  That was crazy.

• 2:27:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:27:30Speaker 00

  Um, I'll try to call Brooks. Uh, let's see.

• 2:27:36Speaker 00

  Yeah. PFT, look at this. We'll, we'll, we'll put this in the, uh, in the show. This is me just la, the, there's just a FaceTime. That Brooks started again, five minutes late. I sent, I sent basically a text just saying the window is now open just to remind everyone.

• 2:27:51Speaker 02

  I could see that if, you know, you, you get a couple of cocktails in you, that text might be implying it's time to call in.

• 2:27:58Speaker 00

  And he was just like, oh shit, did I win?

• 2:28:00Speaker 02

  But then he thought, but then his response was to then FaceTime everybody.

• 2:28:02Speaker 00

  Yeah. And he, he thought that he had then won. That, that was the, that was the, and I had made it very clear.

• 2:28:08Speaker 02

  Now, where is he? What country is he in?

• 2:28:09Speaker 00

  He's in Portugal right now. So.

• 2:28:11Speaker 03

  Nine thirty in Portugal.

• 2:28:13Speaker 00

  Yeah. And oh, I, I even went as far, it actually kind of broke my brain. Uh, because this morning, when I, I, I reminded everyone this morning, I gave them. I set up like a week in advance. Like, does this day work? Does this day work? Then like two days, I'm like, hey, reminder tomorrow's the day. This morning I woke up, I reminded them and then I actually wrote out the, the time zones each of them would be in. So I was like, Brooks, this is going to be from eight thirty to ten thirty your time because I didn't want any, any issues and any, anyone saying, oh, it wasn't fair.

• 2:28:44Speaker 02

  Yeah. Um, it's fitting that he's in Portugal. Some might say that he, he might be the Cristiano Ronaldo of Blake's.

• 2:28:51Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 2:28:51Speaker 02

  Like a lot of accolades.

• 2:28:53Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:28:53Speaker 02

  A lot like, there's no denying one of the all time greats.

• 2:28:56Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:28:56Speaker 02

  But can he win the big one?

• 2:28:58Speaker 00

  No.

• 2:28:59Speaker 02

  Probably not.

• 2:28:59Speaker 00

  The answer's no.

• 2:29:00Speaker 02

  But also great body.

• 2:29:01Speaker 00

  It is, it is an awesome story that if he does ever find a way to win one of these, it's going to be, it's going to be monumental.

• 2:29:08Speaker 02

  I thought it was today. I don't know why. I, the, the Portugal aspect, if I had woke up knowing that he was in Portugal, probably would have changed my.

• 2:29:15Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:29:15Speaker 02

  Premonition a little bit.

• 2:29:16Speaker 00

  But then I thought it maybe.

• 2:29:17Speaker 02

  But also he kind of did win. I see his point.

• 2:29:20Speaker 00

  I, well, yeah, five minutes.

• 2:29:21Speaker 02

  In his mind.

• 2:29:22Speaker 00

  Five minutes late. All right. Hold on. I'm going to call him. Let's see if it pick up.

• 2:29:28Speaker 00

  I don't know if it goes overseas. Nope, it's not even going through, I don't think.

• 2:29:37Speaker 00

  Oh, man. He tried, he tried. It was the most active he's ever been.

• 2:29:44Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:29:44Speaker 00

  In a.

• 2:29:45Speaker 02

  Like I'm saying, this is, I, I see why he would think that he might have won.

• 2:29:50Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:29:50Speaker 02

  He did not win, but I could see, and then really that's what's most important.

• 2:29:54Speaker 00

  And again, he did win Brooks of the year.

• 2:29:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:29:56Speaker 00

  That was, oh, here we go.

• 2:30:06Speaker 00

  It looked incredible where he was. He was just at the.

• 2:30:09Speaker 04

  I'm willing to say he will never win.

• 2:30:11Speaker 02

  Never?

• 2:30:12Speaker 04

  Never.

• 2:30:12Speaker 02

  That's never, don't use the N word, Max.

• 2:30:15Speaker 04

  I'm.

• 2:30:17Speaker 04

  He's never even come close.

• 2:30:19Speaker 00

  This is the closest he's come. He started his own competition just randomly.

• 2:30:25Speaker 00

  So that, that was, that was something.

• 2:30:31Speaker 04

  But the other Blakes are so good.

• 2:30:33Speaker 02

  They are. They take it very seriously.

• 2:30:35Speaker 00

  It's two Titans. Yeah, we got, yeah.

• 2:30:38Speaker 02

  And I, I think the most Blake aspect of him is that he's totally fine with finishing third every year.

• 2:30:43Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:30:43Speaker 02

  He's probably pretty chill with that. Now, if he ever does win, I don't know if he's prepared for how much his life will change overnight. After he wins Blake of the year for the first time, because nobody will be calling him Brooks on the golf course ever again.

• 2:30:55Speaker 00

  No.

• 2:30:55Speaker 02

  It'll just be.

• 2:30:56Speaker 00

  That's a very good point.

• 2:30:57Speaker 02

  It'll just be a chorus of Blakes.

• 2:30:58Speaker 00

  Okay, incredible, incredible Blake of the year competition this year. We should say too, that we had a couple of updates from Brooks afterwards. The first being that he joined the Zoom, how many hours after we finished?

• 2:31:16Speaker 02

  About an hour and a half.

• 2:31:17Speaker 00

  Hour and a half.

• 2:31:17Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:31:19Speaker 04

  Yeah, I think it was about an hour.

• 2:31:19Speaker 00

  Hour and a half after he tried to join, join the Zoom.

• 2:31:22Speaker 02

  I was, I was extremely wrong in my prediction.

• 2:31:24Speaker 00

  He texted and said, where are you guys? Did I win? Uh, that was an hour and a half after the competition ended. Then, uh, today I texted him and I said, hey, do you want to come on and explain what happened? And he said, yeah, send me the link, go into the pool, so might not have phone.

• 2:31:44Speaker 00

  Then I, I texted him the link and he didn't reply. And I followed up. Oh no, actually no. My last text to him was, you have your phone now. We can try to, to, to do this.

• 2:31:56Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 2:31:57Speaker 00

  At 11:24 a.m. today, I sent him that. Five hours later, he just wrote back, nope, definitely can't speak.

• 2:32:06Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 2:32:07Speaker 00

  So he's having a great time in Portugal.

• 2:32:09Speaker 02

  Absolutely. Having a blast.

• 2:32:11Speaker 00

  He might, he might have, there, there are probably like, you know how, when you go back in the history of college football? And you'd be like, oh yeah, well, we won the national title this year. You know, we were undefeated. Oh, there's like 17 teams that can claim a 1912 national title. I think there's some Brooks fans that could potentially in 20 years from now, claim this year in his performance as a national title, as a Blake of the year. From how much, how much of a Blake he was.

• 2:32:37Speaker 02

  He's putting up numbers right now. There's no, there's no doubt about it. That if you look at Blake criteria, the way that he is not giving a fuck about the Blake of the year, is just outstanding. He's actually forcing us to reframe our entire point of view on the award.

• 2:32:50Speaker 00

  Correct.

• 2:32:51Speaker 02

  Um, it still goes to Blake Bortles.

• 2:32:53Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 2:32:53Speaker 02

  Don't get me wrong.

• 2:32:54Speaker 00

  A hundred percent. But I'm saying, in history, people will, they might raise a banner in 30 years in the Koepka household, being like, actually, we claim this title.

• 2:33:02Speaker 02

  It's like ahead of his time.

• 2:33:04Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:33:04Speaker 02

  And, and how he approaches being a Blake. Yes.

• 2:33:07Speaker 00

  Thank you though to the Blakes. They're the best. Okay. Last up, PFT.

• 2:33:10Speaker 02

  Last up. It's the award we've been waiting for.

• 2:33:13Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:33:15Speaker 02

  The 2026 Takey Award for the top podcast listeners of the year. There's a lot of good nominees this year. Daddy Gang nominated again.

• 2:33:27Speaker 00

  Of course.

• 2:33:28Speaker 02

  Uh, the YGT bros.

• 2:33:30Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 2:33:31Speaker 02

  Doing all the post-round catch-ups with the Brian bros and Grant Horvath and all the positivity, kumbaya. We've really appreciated hearing about that. Uh, also nominated, um, would be, uh, the Stavi gang. Shout out Stavi gang. Appreciate you guys. One of the, Stavi as a Greek man should have been in the Odyssey. I'll just say it on this podcast.

• 2:33:51Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 2:33:51Speaker 02

  Would have been a much better movie. And, um, also nominated are the award-winning listeners of Part of My Take.

• 2:33:57Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 2:33:58Speaker 02

  Could be a, a 10-peat.

• 2:34:01Speaker 00

  A 10-peat?

• 2:34:02Speaker 02

  A 10-peat. That sounds a lot like, uh, we're, we're getting into Bill Russell territory.

• 2:34:06Speaker 00

  Holy shit.

• 2:34:08Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:34:08Speaker 00

  You're saying rings for every single finger?

• 2:34:11Speaker 02

  Every finger. And then if maybe for Jason Pierre Paul, you got one for dick and balls too.

• 2:34:15Speaker 00

  Mm hmm. Couple toes.

• 2:34:19Speaker 02

  The winner of the 2026 Takey Award for Podcast Listener of the Year.

• 2:34:26Speaker 02

  The award winning listener is part of my take. Congratulations.

• 2:34:29Speaker 00

  Wow.

• 2:34:30Speaker 02

  Uh, who saw that coming?

• 2:34:32Speaker 00

  Not me.

• 2:34:32Speaker 02

  Not me.

• 2:34:33Speaker 03

  Not me.

• 2:34:34Speaker 00

  It was the two most shocking awards given out, I think in this entire time were award winning listeners. I didn't think they were going to win it again and Hank's fart. Didn't think he had enough.

• 2:34:43Speaker 03

  And Shane trying to kill Pug.

• 2:34:44Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 2:34:45Speaker 00

  Yeah, Shane trying to.

• 2:34:45Speaker 02

  That was kind of a crazy plot twist in this whole thing. Uh, but thank you very much to everybody that's, that's listening to the show right now that continues to listen, that has listened in the past. Um, I sincerely appreciate each and every one of you. I really do. We have the best job in the entire world. It is not lost on me. I feel like we say it, we try to say as much as possible because I mean it. And, um, it's very, very, very special to me that you guys take the time and you opt into hearing the sound of our voice every day. That is a crazy thing and I, I really love all you guys. That's why in every show saying it, I truly appreciate you all. Love you very much. Thank you for being there over the last 10, 11 years. Um, I would not trade any of this for the world. It's been magical and hope to do 10 more with you guys.

• 2:35:31Speaker 02

  If you'll have us, thank you so much. We love you so much.

• 2:35:34Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's, uh, the, the, the 10 year, writing the book, the 10 year anniversary, I've been getting a little bit sentimental. Uh, not in like a bad way of like, oh, it's ending, but in just a holy shit. 10 years is a long time and it's like, everything kind of floods back when you have a anniversary. So 10 years, uh, it really is just unreal. Um, how many people have supported us and listened? And I, I, I think I wrote this in the book, but like the, the thing that makes me happiest is when I'm like walking on the street. Like I'll be walking Stella and someone will walk by with their phone or their headphones and they'll be like, dude, I'm listening to you right now. And it's like, fuck, that's fucking wild. Like it still kind of blows my mind. Like holy shit, we're idiots.

• 2:36:20Speaker 00

  But, uh, it's been. We've been number one for, for a long, long time and it's all because of you guys. So I think that's, yeah, that's also like the, the day we're not number one, then we won't give them AWL.

• 2:36:30Speaker 02

  Yeah, we'll punish you.

• 2:36:32Speaker 00

  Yeah, but you, you guys have shown up for us year in and year out, day in and day out, month in and month out. So thank you so much. And I know Hank wants to say something as well.

• 2:36:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 2:36:43Speaker 03

  Yeah, no, I, I love you guys. Uh, I mean, I said it in, in, in the book as well. Like I don't, I don't. I think if you ran a simulation of my life on this podcast before this podcast started, like 99.9 of them would not have worked out as, as good as doing this podcast has been for the last 10 years of my life. I can't believe any of it's real. Time flies. Feels like just yesterday we started. And I, I appreciate you guys and I, I appreciate the listeners the most.

• 2:37:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, it does. Yeah. There, there was a moment too for me, Big Cat, when I, I got the book today and I was flipping through it. And it just, it hit me all of a sudden, which is like, if, if you were to tell the story of my life, probably the biggest part, no, without a doubt, the biggest part of my life is doing this podcast. It's what I'm going to be remembered for one day. Hopefully a far distance into the future. Um, but it's a testimony to the listeners and um, none of this would ever be possible without you guys. And I, I do love you all. Thank you so much for allowing us to, uh, to be part of your life.

• 2:37:45Speaker 00

  And it's, it's cool to also, I know we're getting very sappy right now, but it is cool. I think it's very important as you get older and I've been trying to do this more is like enjoying the moment and, and embrace like the, the start of the show was such go, go, go, go. Mania of like, we gotta keep going. We gotta keep going. And it's not like we don't, we haven't lost that. We're still trying to get better and trying to get interviews and doing funny stuff, but um. Being able to just say, holy fuck, man, like we, this is, this is pretty substantial. What has happened here, um, you gotta enjoy it and it's because of our listeners like that. If they're not listening, we're nothing and, and all this that we have and

• 2:38:28Speaker 00

  the, the fact that we get to do this with our friends and we all remain friends and just fuck around. We talk about it all the time, but we, our biggest problem, our biggest flaw as a podcast is we chill too hard before the show, just shooting the shit. Like we have a problem with it where we, we say, we're going to start at like seven PM and we just sit in our chairs and just shoot the shit for like an hour.

• 2:38:48Speaker 02

  We do an extra podcast.

• 2:38:49Speaker 00

  Do an extra podcast. Yeah. But yes, it is the listeners who make this thing go. We never ever lose sight of that. So thank you all and let's, uh, let's finish with numbers memes.

• 2:38:59Speaker 02

  Wait, I've, I do have breaking moose.

• 2:39:01Speaker 00

  Oh, breaking moose.

• 2:39:06Speaker 02

  Jacoby Berset is at practice today.

• 2:39:08Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 2:39:09Speaker 02

  Our long national nightmare might be over.

• 2:39:11Speaker 00

  Holdout of the year?

• 2:39:12Speaker 02

  I think holdout of the year might be done. Now he's holding in.

• 2:39:14Speaker 00

  Wow. All right. Memes, have you ever gotten this?

• 2:39:18Speaker 06

  I have.

• 2:39:19Speaker 00

  No, you haven't.

• 2:39:19Speaker 06

  I, I have won this.

• 2:39:20Speaker 00

  Did we ever find out who was kumbaya?

• 2:39:23Speaker 02

  It's Hank. Hank's the kumbaya.

• 2:39:25Speaker 06

  Shane's in his feelings right now with onions.

• 2:39:26Speaker 00

  Oh, so Shane, you say one thing and you just lose.

• 2:39:29Speaker 06

  He shuts down. Tried to kill Pug.

• 2:39:33Speaker 02

  He did try to kill Pug.

• 2:39:34Speaker 00

  What did he say to me? What are you pointing at me like that?

• 2:39:39Speaker 02

  I don't think you initiate, I think the word kumbaya came up first and then Hank agreed.

• 2:39:44Speaker 06

  When did this happen?

• 2:39:45Speaker 00

  Who said kumbaya?

• 2:39:47Speaker 03

  Big Cat took an absolute ricochet at me.

• 2:39:49Speaker 02

  I think it was the start of Mount Rushmore season.

• 2:39:51Speaker 03

  And then I responded.

• 2:39:53Speaker 00

  Thank you memes.

• 2:39:53Speaker 03

  And then you guys were like, let's just do kumbaya.

• 2:39:56Speaker 02

  No, we're all, we're in agreeance of kumbaya. What's crazy is that I don't think. And then kumbaya. I think Hank and Zach have won this year, Mount Rushmore.

• 2:40:04Speaker 02

  They don't have a single win.

• 2:40:05Speaker 00

  A kumbaya, bro.

• 2:40:06Speaker 02

  I don't know. Just stats, just stats.

• 2:40:08Speaker 00

  Shane, did you ever find out?

• 2:40:10Speaker 02

  Shane, did you ever find out?

• 2:40:12Speaker 06

  His head's down, he's down.

• 2:40:13Speaker 04

  It was Dom.

• 2:40:14Speaker 00

  No, kumbaya.

• 2:40:15Speaker 02

  Kumbaya.

• 2:40:16Speaker 04

  Oh.

• 2:40:18Speaker 04

  I thought you were talking about, I thought you were talking about the.

• 2:40:19Speaker 00

  Pug? No, no, we don't care about Pug. You tried to kill Pug. It's fine.

• 2:40:24Speaker 00

  You tried to kill Pug. You always hated Pug. It's fine. Who, who said, who said kumbaya first?

• 2:40:33Speaker 04

  I think it was Hank.

• 2:40:35Speaker 00

  All right. So then we're fine. That's good enough.

• 2:40:37Speaker 06

  That was a great look.

• 2:40:40Speaker 00

  Still serving looks. Oh, that's great. Oh.

• 2:40:43Speaker 03

  There's no way. Change is whatever.

• 2:40:46Speaker 00

  I think it was Hank.

• 2:40:47Speaker 03

  I think it was Hank.

• 2:40:48Speaker 00

  We're gonna find it out. All right, numbers.

• 2:40:52Speaker 04

  I'm gonna do 99.

• 2:40:53Speaker 03

  It's two 11.

• 2:40:53Speaker 00

  Five, seven.

• 2:40:54Speaker 03

  For the 11 takeys.

• 2:40:55Speaker 04

  86.

• 2:40:56Speaker 06

  Do 10.

• 2:40:57Speaker 04

  Shout out Pug.

• 2:40:58Speaker 02

  69.

• 2:40:58Speaker 00

  88 for Patrick Kane.

• 2:41:00Speaker 06

  Remember when the AWLs almost didn't win the award?

• 2:41:03Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 2:41:03Speaker 06

  Big Cat was addicted to coin flipping?

• 2:41:05Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 2:41:05Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:41:06Speaker 04

  Oh, shit. I was just thinking about that.

• 2:41:07Speaker 00

  I forgot about that.

• 2:41:09Speaker 04

  I thought, every year, I think there's a chance that you'll do it again.

• 2:41:13Speaker 02

  We should do it.

• 2:41:13Speaker 00

  I should do it again.

• 2:41:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, how exhilarating would that be?

• 2:41:16Speaker 04

  You already did it.

• 2:41:18Speaker 00

  I want to do that next year. Zach, remind me. We got a coin flip.

• 2:41:21Speaker 03

  Just cause a coin flip?

• 2:41:22Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:41:23Speaker 03

  Gotcha.

• 2:41:24Speaker 04

  The coin flip, I'm out on that.

• 2:41:26Speaker 00

  I, but listen, it's in God's hands. The coin's gonna always land the right way.

• 2:41:29Speaker 03

  That was my fault.

• 2:41:31Speaker 00

  Do we not agree that God is an AWL with the 1 in a billion shot of all of this coming together?

• 2:41:38Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 2:41:38Speaker 00

  So? He'll call, he'll call tails.

• 2:41:41Speaker 02

  God, you wash your apples?

• 2:41:42Speaker 00

  Does anyone have a coin right now? Let's just see what it would have been. Let's see what it would have been. Does anyone have a coin?

• 2:41:46Speaker 04

  Oh, wait. Oh, wait.

• 2:41:47Speaker 06

  You're holding a coin.

• 2:41:51Speaker 04

  I'm holding this. It's a ball marker.

• 2:41:53Speaker 00

  This does, this doesn't count, obviously, because we already gave it to them, and they deserve it this year, because this year was a great year, and we know they're gonna show up for the book, and they're the best.

• 2:42:03Speaker 06

  What if it, what if it hits, we release cool 10-year anniversary t-shirts?

• 2:42:08Speaker 00

  Oh.

• 2:42:09Speaker 02

  Okay. That we are, are releasing. Regardless.

• 2:42:13Speaker 04

  Regardless, but, good, I like.

• 2:42:15Speaker 00

  All right, so if, let's just say that this is just purely hypothetical. I'm just prove to you guys that God is an AWL. I'm gonna prove to you guys, uh, so if it is tails, then the AWLs would have won, if we had done this as a coin flip, the AWLs would have won a 10th in a row. And if it is heads, what? One has your fucking face on it, dude.

• 2:42:36Speaker 02

  It'll be head.

• 2:42:38Speaker 06

  Turn your brain on dude.

• 2:42:40Speaker 00

  Hit of its heads, then they, we would have given it to, uh, Stavi Gang. Alright.

• 2:42:46Speaker 06

  Max also has a mic behind him.

• 2:42:49Speaker 00

  Tails. Just like I said. Did it again. Did you see that? Never even. That was one fucking flip. He's an A W L. Don't worry about it. It's in God's hands. He's got this. Do you see this? Use it. Memes. I mean, Max, you see this?

• 2:43:03Speaker 06

  The, the mic's just behind.

• 2:43:05Speaker 00

  So you were worried. Never be worried.

• 2:43:07Speaker 06

  No, but we, the, I would have made the argument that even if it wasn't tails, we already gave the awards. So it didn't even matter.

• 2:43:14Speaker 00

  I'm not. Correct.

• 2:43:15Speaker 03

  They said, he said that.

• 2:43:16Speaker 00

  I said that. I'm just saying hypothetically, if it had been a coin flip today, what would it have been? And it would have been, still they got it.

• 2:43:22Speaker 06

  Shirts on sale, Barstool Sports Store.

• 2:43:25Speaker 00

  Love it memes. Good call.

• 2:43:26Speaker 06

  Flash monster green.

• 2:43:28Speaker 00

  Now what are you doing? Tails if, uh, Max is, uh, done getting married. Heads if he's got another one in him.

• 2:43:36Speaker 00

  Tails, bang. Told you. I got you dude. It's good. Yeah. I trust the coin. Alright.

• 2:43:46Speaker 00

  That was actually way more nervous than the first one.

• 2:43:50Speaker 06

  We would probably would have cut that.

• 2:43:51Speaker 00

  I was very nervous.

• 2:43:53Speaker 06

  We probably would have cut that one.

• 2:43:54Speaker 00

  Very nervous. Another bachelor party would rock. Or it'd be his third bachelor party.

• 2:44:00Speaker 03

  Eleven.

• 2:44:00Speaker 06

  Oh. Anyone?

• 2:44:03Speaker 00

  One.

• 2:44:04Speaker 03

  Said eleven.

• 2:44:05Speaker 00

  One. I think we should do one number. One number. No, I don't think we do another one.

• 2:44:10Speaker 06

  No, you gotta do two.

• 2:44:10Speaker 00

  One's the number.

• 2:44:11Speaker 02

  I'm fine with one. I don't need to beg for it. Yeah. Memes if you want to.

• 2:44:14Speaker 00

  One's the number.

• 2:44:14Speaker 06

  Seems cool.

• 2:44:15Speaker 00

  You guys are number one. There you go.

• 2:44:18Speaker 02

  Love you guys. Also happy birthday to Barry Bonds. Happy birthday to, uh, I'm not going to say this name. Nope. I'm not going to say Karl Malone. Happy birthday. Happy birthday to, uh, Cody at Barstool. He tells jokes. Love you guys.

• 2:44:34Speaker 00

  Oh, wait, hold on.

• 2:44:40Speaker 00

  Brooks.

• 2:44:44Speaker 00

  Brooks.

• 2:44:47Speaker 00

  He's butt dialing me, I think. You see this? Hey Brooks, what's up?

• 2:44:53Speaker 00

  How we doing, buddy?

• 2:44:58Speaker 00

  Hey! Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yes.

• 2:45:13Speaker 00

  What happened yesterday?

• 2:45:18Speaker 00

  What's up? Who's that guy?

• 2:45:21Speaker 07

  I don't know, I can't hear you.

• 2:45:24Speaker 07

  I don't know. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know.

• 2:45:26Speaker 00

  Alright.

• 2:45:38Speaker 00

  Do you have a... You almost won. You almost won yesterday. Do you have a message for everyone who was rooting for you?

• 2:45:44Speaker 07

  Uh, listen, I'm a born loser.

• 2:45:50Speaker 07

  I'll never be any good. Um, yeah, just a born loser. Gambling, anything, I'm a born loser. I don't know what to tell you guys.

• 2:45:59Speaker 00

  You have a bunch of majors. Yeah, you got... Five majors?

• 2:46:06Speaker 00

  I love that. Alright, next year Blake of the Year, you're gonna win.

• 2:46:18Speaker 00

  Alright, we love you, Brooks. Thanks, Brooks. Alright, see ya, have fun. See you, buddy. Bye.