Pod Insights Pablo Torre Finds Out Share & Tell & Age with Domonique Foxworth and David Samson About this episode How often are male friends sincere? Can you work your way into fighting shape? Should parents let their kids get on the juice? What makes a nerd? And how do you do a threesome? Plus: burgling, maquettes, hotel phones, the recognizability of a cursive Z... and The Adventures of Lil' David Samson, prosperity gospel panderer.
• Help David Samson raise $50,000 for Parkinson's research
https://give.michaeljfox.org/fundraiser/6398662
• Subscribe to "Nothing Personal with David Samson"
https://www.youtube.com/@npds
• Subscribe to "The Domonique Foxworth Show"
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-domonique-foxworth-show/id1642566714
Previously on PTFO:
• Is Russell Wilson an Undercover Alien Running for President of the United States?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AO5EWTs6GyQ
• The Hard Truth About Orgasms in Sports, with Domonique Foxworth
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wifyyrtuKDk
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy https://acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript 11,112 words · 8 speakers
Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.
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2:56 Speaker 01 I'm Pablo Torre, and this episode of Pablo Torre Finds Out is brought to you by Remy Martin 1738 Accord Royale, exceptionally smooth cognac for all your game day festivities. Please drink responsibly. Because today, we're gonna find out what this sound is.
3:14 Speaker 02 Can I get an amen?
3:16 Speaker 01 Right after this ad.
3:24 Speaker 01 I am very excited to do this. Please allow a moment of sincerity. We have not done this enough. Dominique, David, at a table together.
3:36 Speaker 03 I refuse to allow a moment of sincerity. Instead, would like to continue mocking you for chasing around Jordan Hudson and somehow claiming that you deserve a Peabody.
3:47 Speaker 02 I didn't tell you this. I was sitting with Pablo right as a People Magazine article came out with his mug on it, on the thumbnail of it. And what I saw, and I said this to you at the time, so we're here amongst almost sort of friends. And you could tell this warm aura of invincibility flow over him like some sort of mucus when he was on People.com. And the irony is, he walks around the studio talking about Murrow and talking about serious journalism.
4:23 Speaker 01 Peabodies.
4:24 Speaker 02 Peabodies. Right? So I'm wondering whether Pablo, and I meant this, this I didn't ask you before, are you going to put that as part of now your elevator speech about PTFO? Because you mentioned, obviously, all the awards.
4:38 Pablo Torre? You're asking, are we folding it into our awards budget?
4:41 Speaker 02 Exactly.
4:42 Pablo Torre? Somehow gotten smaller since we won the awards.
4:46 Speaker 02 I don't mean your budget.
4:47 Pablo Torre? It's a very curious thing. Are we gonna do that now today?
4:48 Speaker 03 When you're advertising the show, are you gonna say like, I won this, I won that, and I was on people?
4:52 Pablo Torre? I was on, yeah.
4:54 Speaker 03 I have a question for you, though. Is your, do you believe?
4:57 Speaker 02 How many more questions are there?
4:57 Speaker 03 No, this is, this is a kind question. Do you believe that your ego is any bigger and your desire for these type of, this type of recognition is any bigger than anyone else's? Or you think you're right in the middle, but you're more honest about it?
5:11 Pablo Torre? Right. Let's rank our egos. Can we do that? Can we power rank?
5:15 Speaker 02 It's gonna be a tie for first in this room. There is no shortage of ego in this room.
5:21 Speaker 03 Nope.
5:21 Speaker 02 It just manifests itself in different ways.
5:23 Pablo Torre? Yeah. For instance, you walked into the office today and you had a paper bag full of some stuff. And you had your sneakers on, your multicolored sneakers on. And you had, what else did you, what else do you have?
5:36 Speaker 02 Well, it was a sandwich and some chips and a ginger ale. Because we did all this for Dominique.
5:43 Pablo Torre? Mm-hmm.
5:44 Speaker 02 And, and so I drove two and a half for this show. And now I'm driving back two and a half just to do this, because this was your only window. This is what I was told.
5:56 Speaker 03 You, you fell for this lie.
5:58 Speaker 02 This better be Pablo.
6:00 Speaker 03 I'm sorry.
6:01 Pablo Torre? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
6:02 Speaker 03 It was completely true.
6:03 Pablo Torre? My credibility is paramount to me and my episodes.
6:07 Speaker 03 Completely true.
6:08 Pablo Torre? Please, fact check yourself, Dominique.
6:11 Speaker 03 Completely true.
6:12 Pablo Torre? We made, we, you, we, together, said, David, we want to do this in person. There's gonna be a moment of sincerity even. And it's just gonna require you to be here in person. And David drove two and a half.
6:25 Speaker 02 Well, I asked for all sorts of other windows of opportunities to do it. And Dominique was a no on every one of them.
6:33 Pablo Torre? But Dominique came from DC.
6:35 Speaker 02 It's okay. If you guys manipulated me, it's fine. I got in the car and I did it.
6:38 Speaker 03 No one has been manipulated. It is all honesty and truth between us.
6:41 Pablo Torre? We're ruining the moment of sincerity.
6:44 Speaker 02 It passed for me.
6:45 Speaker 03 It's gone. There is no sincerity.
6:47 Speaker 02 Gone. I've been thinking a lot about you. I haven't seen you in a while. It's good to see you.
6:50 Speaker 03 You too. When are friends, like, when are male friends sincere? How often does that happen? Like, I don't, I'm not. I've gotten better with it as an adult, but most of the time, I just, I just roast my friends and they know that means that I love them.
7:03 Pablo Torre? Right, right, right. Should we each say one sincere, nice thing about each other?
7:06 Speaker 03 No.
7:07 Speaker 02 I don't think that's interesting.
7:08 Pablo Torre? Okay, great.
7:09 Speaker 02 Oh, God.
7:11 Speaker 03 Who?
7:11 Speaker 02 I wasn't ready. It's one, two, three Brett about raising, we just-
7:15 Pablo Torre? Don't guilt us into yelling at you for picking up the phone.
7:18 Speaker 02 Um, we're announcing today our new charitable endeavor because after all these years, they still haven't cured [BLEEP] Parkinson's. And I, it's unbelievable that they haven't. So we have to keep doing these athletic events.
7:32 Pablo Torre? Dominique, do you see what happens when we get us in a room together?
7:37 Speaker 03 What was the highest, the highest level of science you made it to?
7:41 Speaker 02 Uh, 10th grade?
7:44 Speaker 03 So-
7:45 Speaker 02 That's true. I don't know why you're laughing. Do you have a cure for Parkinson's?
7:49 Speaker 03 I don't, but I recognize that it's probably hard and I'm not, I'll hear like, man, these mother [BLEEP] hurry up. I've been waiting all day, like, like you ordered a sandwich from a deli.
7:59 Speaker 02 Michael J. Fox, when he started his foundation, said that he expects to be out of business within a decade.
8:04 Speaker 03 So-
8:05 Speaker 02 Didn't quite happen that way.
8:06 Pablo Torre? You know what, you know what, if I may have yet a third moment of sincerity, because now we had that one and that's like obviously sincere. The third moment of sincerity-
8:18 Speaker 03 He thinks that he's ordering a cure for Parkinson's like it's a goddamn chopped cheese.
8:25 Speaker 03 Like, I've been waiting for 10 years.
8:27 Speaker 02 I am not waiting anymore. Had it.
8:48 Speaker 02 Anyway, it's been quite telling since we were all last together in Miami that Pablo has just shot himself out of a cannon. And it's all due to the ring camera.
8:59 Pablo Torre? Okay, it's not just that. We do three episodes a [bleep] week.
9:02 Speaker 02 I would like to ask, though, on the shirt issue, because this was important to me and we had a
9:07 Pablo Torre? What's the shirt?
9:07 Speaker 02 A creative issue.
9:09 Speaker 03 I agree. I think I know where you're going and I agree with you.
9:11 Speaker 02 You, you agree that the shirt should have been off?
9:13 Speaker 03 Yeah.
9:14 Speaker 02 A hundred percent. Now, if you had
9:16 Pablo Torre? Everybody behind the glass is now yelling.
9:18 Speaker 02 Dominique's body, would you have had shirt off?
9:20 Pablo Torre? So I had
9:21 Speaker 02 Because he also is very soft.
9:23 Speaker 03 Yeah, a little squishy.
9:25 Pablo Torre? Listen, I have been doing Parkinson's races in which I complain about Parkinson scientists, but I am somebody who, uh, no, I still have something in my fighting weight.
9:34 Speaker 02 Hmm. It's just redistributed.
9:36 Pablo Torre? It is disturbing when I realize that fighting weight is light heavyweight, though. I was like, are boxers, have boxers always been this small?
9:43 Speaker 03 Yes, yes.
9:44 Pablo Torre? It's crazy.
9:45 Speaker 03 It is crazy.
9:46 Pablo Torre? What a heavyweight boxer weighs. To answer your question, if I had Dominique's, uh, breasts, yeah, I would have, I would have
9:53 Speaker 02 I thought so too. He claimed it was a journalism decision.
9:56 Pablo Torre? Yeah, I don't want to be the, look, I, I need to
9:58 Speaker 02 But I think it was a chess decision.
10:00 Pablo Torre? I need to preserve some element of credibility, uh, and I think that was, again, as we say on Dominique's show, we have to thread the coward's needle, and I believe that my threading of the coward's needle was, I'm gonna do this, but I just can't be so much of the story, actually.
10:16 Speaker 02 How can you?
10:17 Pablo Torre? Okay.
10:19 Speaker 02 That is so ridiculous.
10:21 Pablo Torre? I regret the moments of sincerity that I have.
10:22 Speaker 02 Can you pull up a photo of Lenny Kravitz at 61? It just got released. He looks amazing. Now
10:29 Pablo Torre? Lenny Kravitz?
10:30 Speaker 02 Looks unbelievable.
10:31 Pablo Torre? So, okay, so we should talk about this.
10:33 Speaker 03 What we doing?
10:34 Speaker 02 It's got, it's not normal. He has a full six-pack.
10:36 Speaker 03 Nice.
10:37 Speaker 02 At 61.
10:38 Speaker 03 Good for him.
10:39 Speaker 02 No, but it can't be natural. Are you looking at the same thing that I recently saw last week or something?
10:43 Pablo Torre? Men's health?
10:45 Speaker 03 Lenny's ripped.
10:46 Speaker 02 Now, is that, is that natural?
10:48 Speaker 03 Uh, probably not.
10:48 Speaker 02 You can't
10:49 Speaker 03 But I mean, I, I feel like it's a lot of that in Hollywood. They don't, there's, there's no P-Man in Hollywood who's covered around testing you, like.
10:55 Pablo Torre? There's no P-Man at, uh, Avengers headquarters.
10:59 Speaker 03 Yeah.
11:00 Speaker 02 Actors say they did. Will Smith talked about it with, uh, with Ali.
11:04 Speaker 03 Yeah, for movies, I'm sure they have some.
11:05 Pablo Torre? I wanted to do an episode about this, actually, for a long time. Like, why are all these actors ripped now? So if you watch, like, certainly you watched, uh, White Lotus, they're just like, everybody's jacked. I'm like, your character does not require you to be obsessively working out. You're not a former NFL player trying to reclaim former glory. Why are you exercising?
11:24 Speaker 02 The irony, of course, is that you can add abs in post. I mean, if there's a budget for post-production, which some shows have and some don't. But you can add stuff. And so you don't actually need to look that way in real life. So I don't know why there's all of a sudden.
11:39 Speaker 03 I would imagine that they aren't adding stuff for people whose character doesn't need it, right? Like, so to Pablo's point, the White Lotus guys, they probably just.
11:48 Speaker 02 Well, one is Schwarzenegger. I assume that he's just big for genetics.
11:51 Pablo Torre? But the season before, there was a dude who was like the founder of a tech company. And he was like, you know, this part Asian dude. And he was like, clearly not required to be jacked. And that guy was, again, a guy whose shirt I would take off if I was him.
12:05 Speaker 02 I'm embarrassed of my body.
12:06 Speaker 03 Why?
12:07 Speaker 02 Because it's not a good body. I don't have a good body.
12:09 Speaker 03 I mean, fortunately, you're, I mean, nobody cares.
12:13 Speaker 02 Well, I do, but again, I do.
12:16 Pablo Torre? Well, I think, I would say that on the power rankings of people who are
12:23 Pablo Torre? older than they look.
12:26 Pablo Torre? Link Kravitz, ESPN announcer Mark Jones.
12:29 Speaker 03 Oh, ageless.
12:31 Pablo Torre? Ageless. Mark Jones was, at last check, in his 60s.
12:34 Speaker 03 Also has more pop culture references than me.
12:38 Pablo Torre? He's 63 and internet fluent.
12:40 Speaker 03 Yeah, he's much closer to the meme game than your boy.
12:44 Pablo Torre? And David Samson's on that list.
12:46 Speaker 02 I'm doing well from the neck up. I have slight concerns about from the neck down.
12:53 Speaker 03 You know what I think is interesting is like the changing to this point. It feels like the ideas around like plastic surgery, which is, it's only reasonable that over time as it's been around. Because it feels like when we were young, it felt relatively new. Like the idea of getting enhancements and whatever. It was like, it was a big deal if someone had breast implants. It was like, oh my gosh, look at this, breast implants. And like, it's been around long enough now that I feel like we're getting to a point where.
13:23 Speaker 03 The type of person that is going to get things, like the idea that men get height surgeries.
13:29 Pablo Torre? Oh, God.
13:29 Speaker 03 And that's like an extreme version of it, but like I know people who've gotten their hair transplant. And it's like.
13:34 Pablo Torre? To go to Turkey?
13:35 Speaker 03 Yeah, no, I mean, you only go to Turkey.
13:37 Speaker 02 Turkey's the place.
13:38 Speaker 03 You only go to Turkey to get it cheap, though, right? You can get it in the States.
13:41 Speaker 02 No, it's quality.
13:41 Speaker 03 Oh, it's better quality?
13:42 Speaker 02 The best quality is Turkey for hair and for veneers, actually.
13:46 Speaker 03 Oh, nice.
13:46 Speaker 02 Why is that? I, listen, I assume they stayed at a Holiday and Express, but whatever the reason is, that people save their money to go to Turkey to get it, and then they come back with plugs. I don't get the whole thing.
13:58 Speaker 03 Why not? I mean, if you, I don't understand how you don't get it, like it's.
14:02 Pablo Torre? You've never contemplated getting your legs broken and then extended and then healed over so that you could be three inches taller?
14:09 Speaker 02 So I was short, and I will tell you exactly what I did do.
14:12 Pablo Torre? We're doing that as a past tense.
14:15 Speaker 02 I am short, thank you. Appreciate that, Dominique. Thank you for your phlegmy-filled laugh of disdain.
14:22 Speaker 03 It's not disdain.
14:23 Speaker 02 It's more contempt, that's fine.
14:24 Speaker 03 It's a good joke, I'm being a good teammate.
14:26 Speaker 02 I hung from a bar.
14:28 Speaker 03 Michael Jordan did that.
14:29 Speaker 02 And I would spend more time than I wish to acknowledge. So there's a bar in my doorway in the apartment where I grew up. I grew up in a room, in a bedroom, and it's like a expandable stick that is supposed to be used for.
14:44 Pablo Torre? Pull-ups.
14:44 Speaker 02 Pull-ups and push-ups, but I didn't do it for that. I did it, I put it high, so there was no way to, just so that my fingers would fit right above it, and that's it, and I would hang. And I mean, like, for hours.
14:58 Pablo Torre? Oh, my God.
14:58 Speaker 02 Weirdly, and because.
15:00 Pablo Torre? The adverb was unnecessary.
15:01 Speaker 02 I had been told that it actually works.
15:06 Speaker 03 I remember Come Fly With Me, I assume that you guys are familiar with this tape by Michael Jordan where nobody in his family is close to 6'6", and he said that he saw an episode of The Brady Bunch, as you can tell, I watched Come Fly With Me far too many times, that, an episode of The Brady Bunch where someone did this, and he said that he did it. He doesn't suggest that that's the reason why he's tall, but he said that when he was young, he wanted to be tall and he tried it.
15:30 Pablo Torre? So when you hang from the bar, the idea is that the gravity extends your spine? That's the whole thing?
15:36 Speaker 02 It's nothing. So what it did is I would get, my arms would be sore.
15:42 Speaker 03 Right.
15:42 Speaker 02 So, but I would do it because what I thought, because I had been told by coaches, like in middle school and in elementary school, that after the sore is where the improvement comes. So I always felt like I had to get to the arms hurting. And then I had to hang on even longer because that's when the growth would happen. I also slept always on my stomach with my toes over the bottom of the bed. And so my, I wasn't near the top of the mattress, but I would go to the bottom of the mattress because I had read as a kid, so it may have been written by Dr. Seuss, that if you sleep on your front with your legs extended, toes over the bed, that while you're sleeping, your legs grow too.
16:23 Pablo Torre? Man, we could have made so much money off of a young David.
16:28 Speaker 02 These aren't costly fixes. But we could have sold you some of those shoes. Those dunk shoes, remember those dunk shoes?
16:34 Speaker 03 Oh, yeah, I remember those. I, my parents wouldn't buy me the dunk shoes, but I, I did buy a parachute to get faster when I was young.
16:41 Speaker 02 Of course you did.
16:41 Speaker 03 It was great.
16:42 Speaker 02 Did you run with it behind you?
16:43 Speaker 03 Yeah, of course.
16:44 Speaker 02 That's funny.
16:45 Pablo Torre? Was it, hold on, was it a parachute for the purpose of NFL prospect training? Or was it a generic parachute that you were like, I think this is gonna do the job?
16:53 Speaker 03 Well, I think I saw somebody using a parachute on TV. And so I was like, yeah, I think this is gonna do the job. And I mean, the funny thing is, I, I had this conversation. I did another podcast recently and I was talking about how it wasn't until I was like in my mid twenties that I realized that I believed that hard work was like much more important to my success than like the genetic makeup. And I was like, I would look around at other people like, you're just not working hard enough. It's like, eh.
17:32 Pablo Torre? Get your nurture up, son.
17:34 Speaker 03 Yeah, but I mean, I, I think that they're incremental gains, obviously, but.
17:41 Speaker 03 Fundamentally, I was like born.
17:44 Pablo Torre? Now you're team nature?
17:45 Speaker 03 Uh.
17:45 Speaker 02 Sounds like it.
17:47 Speaker 03 I mean, there is some nurture aspect, but what I can't, what you can't do is work your way into being an athlete. Like, you can make yourself a better athlete.
17:56 Pablo Torre? Oh, David, David's, David's frowning thoughtfully.
17:59 Speaker 02 So I believe that the increment, you have to have natural ability, but I think the differentiating factor is the hard work you put in, which I, which would count for purposes of this conversation as nurture.
18:08 Speaker 03 Right. No, I, I, I don't disagree with you. I'm, but I'm saying that if you are born
18:15 Speaker 03 from a couple of non-athlete parents, no matter how hard you work.
18:21 Pablo Torre? What, what if?
18:22 Speaker 03 Ain't gonna change.
18:23 Pablo Torre? What if I, what if I hung on a bar for a really long time?
18:26 Speaker 03 I find hilarious that David, it kind of turned his nose up at people getting hair transplants. When clearly if you are.
18:35 Speaker 02 There's a big difference between plastic surgery, transplants and hanging from a bar. That's au naturel. I didn't take test, by the way, I didn't take any of the stuff, the growth hormone.
18:46 Pablo Torre? Yeah, Leo Messi got some HGH and.
18:49 Speaker 02 Kids do it all the time.
18:50 Pablo Torre? Grew, I guess minimally, but enough.
18:52 Speaker 03 They do all the time. That's a new thing?
18:54 Speaker 02 Yes, it is a huge thing.
18:55 Speaker 03 Even without like any sort of like ailment that would require it, they're just getting all HGH?
19:00 Speaker 02 The fight that we had with our son, because we had, we, I'm short still, and my wife at the time was short. Well, not average for women, but he was worried because his older sisters were short. So he was panicked and he wanted to go on the juice. And he had friends on the juice who had other small Jewish parents.
19:20 Pablo Torre? With, with what?
19:20 Speaker 02 And we said no.
19:21 Pablo Torre? With what intent? Just like general walking around?
19:24 Speaker 02 No, what?
19:25 Speaker 03 Yeah, yeah, yeah. It wasn't, it wasn't to be an athlete. It was to, yeah.
19:28 Speaker 02 To grow.
19:29 Speaker 03 Yeah.
19:30 Speaker 02 And you, and you go to, you go to doctors who they chart you and they say, hey, you're gonna end up being around 5'5", around your dad's height, and he wanted to be 5'10", and so he wanted to go on the juice. We said no. And by the way.
19:43 Pablo Torre? For the YouTube audience, I'm gonna kind of high five.
19:45 Speaker 02 Similar parents said yes, which made us look even worse. Because.
19:50 Speaker 03 But he, he appreciates you now.
19:52 Speaker 02 Hard to tell.
19:53 Speaker 03 Yeah.
19:53 Pablo Torre? Did you speak to him in the language of?
19:55 Speaker 03 Some of those kids that get sick, man. We need those kids to start passing out.
19:59 Pablo Torre? Oh, yeah. Get some therapeutic use exemptions.
20:02 Speaker 03 We gotta get them kids to start passing out so you can say, see? See?
20:07 Speaker 02 I'm not wishing his best friends ill. Man, a little bad. But I will say. Just gotta lose consciousness for a second. So we watched it on sleepovers. These kids would come over to the house for sleepovers with stuff that had to be refrigerated and they had to shoot themselves during sleepovers. This is the real deal. I believe you.
20:24 Speaker 03 And they were still terrible at basketball?
20:26 Speaker 02 Oh, this was not, yes. This was not done to be good at basketball.
20:29 Speaker 03 I know, but I'm just saying, you couldn't get some residual hoopin' skills or something? Get a little bit of...
20:34 Speaker 02 Their parents were Jewish bankers.
20:36 Speaker 03 So that's why we could...
20:37 Speaker 02 I thought you just said that you can't... I thought we just went over that you can't...
20:42 Speaker 03 No, no, no, no. My point is like in the higher levels, like you're not going to work your way from being an average athlete to being a pro level athlete. But you're a high school kid shooting some testosterone in your butt? Like, I feel like you should be able to whoop some high school ass.
20:57 Speaker 02 It's HGH, actually.
20:59 Speaker 03 Oh, HGH.
20:59 Pablo Torre? Which is, which is safer? Allegedly?
21:02 Speaker 02 I would view all of it, we were a no to all of it.
21:05 Pablo Torre? Did you, when you told...
21:07 Speaker 03 It's good parenting, good job.
21:08 Pablo Torre? When you parented, did you speak, because you come from the world of baseball as former president of the Marlins, a team that I presume, by the way, at some point in the course of your oversight, encountered cases where it was like, I think this guy's doing something?
21:21 Speaker 02 Oh, we knew our guys were doing it. Yeah. No, I came from the land of being short. And I said to my son, I'm short and I'm great. Like, you're gonna be fine. You have to own it and learn it and learn to deal with things. Stand on your tippy toes during photos, there's just things you can do to try to maximize your 65 inches. But he wanted, he didn't want that. The irony, of course, is he ended up being 5'8" or 5'9".
21:48 Speaker 03 Nice.
21:49 Pablo Torre? I would high five him if he was here.
21:50 Speaker 02 So he's, he's doing fine. Yeah, I don't know if you've met him, it's Caleb, he's great. But it's, it's just a funny thing, what parents do. When I was growing up and I was not on the growth chart, when I'd go to the doctor, it was very stressful with Dr. Malachak, where they would chart where you are before each school year. And I was always, you know, 10 percentile. And you're hoping for the growth spurt, because the doctor says you're gonna have a growth spurt. It's gonna be... Because my father wasn't short and it never came. And so those were always such anxiety-producing appointments.
22:20 Pablo Torre? I'm just getting a sense of David's origin story when it comes to his deep distrust of doctors and scientists.
22:27 Speaker 02 It's gonna happen.
22:28 Speaker 03 Screw you, man.
22:29 Speaker 02 We're gonna get a cure. It's happening. It really is such a scam, isn't it? All these diseases that they're gonna carry.
22:35 Speaker 03 No. I mean, maybe it is, I don't know, but I assume it's not.
22:40 Pablo Torre? This is not the kind of live-to-tape episode I wanted to have. We are questioning the profession of my parents, incidentally, who did do something to me as a kid, where they put a lock on the power cord of the television.
22:53 Speaker 02 So you couldn't watch TV?
22:54 Pablo Torre? So I couldn't watch TV.
22:56 Speaker 03 Nice.
22:57 Pablo Torre? I was born in the darkness, raised in it, molded by it.
22:59 Speaker 02 My parents undid the cable. At apartments, cable comes in through one outlet.
23:05 Pablo Torre? Yep.
23:05 Speaker 02 And so when they'd be out, all the TVs wouldn't work. And there were no computers, no anything. And so I would spend, just to screw them, I would spend the entire time searching the apartment looking for any way to watch TV. And I found, in one of their closets, behind the French francs and Swiss francs, which I didn't steal, because I was far more interested in a little hurricane-ready, battery, um, four-inch, black-and-white TV. And so I would take that out of the closet, and I'd watch it while they were out, just to screw them, because they wouldn't let me watch TV.
23:38 Pablo Torre? What were you watching, back at that time?
23:39 Speaker 02 Well, there were three channels, I mean, anything, it didn't matter to me.
23:42 Pablo Torre? You were watching Howdy Doody.
23:43 Speaker 02 It was victory.
23:44 Speaker 03 There's so many, you, you, almost every sentence you utter just has so many avenues to go now.
23:49 Pablo Torre? I like the European currency, personally.
23:51 Speaker 03 Yeah, it's like, he said, "I did steal it." What you gonna do with it, David?
23:55 Speaker 02 Go to the bank and exchange it.
23:57 Speaker 03 What? So I guess I-
23:59 Pablo Torre? Little David, The Adventures of Little David Sampson, like, it's Muppet Babies, by the way, just going to the bank with some Swiss francs.
24:05 Speaker 02 French francs, before the Euros, French francs. And I would say, "Excuse me, can I exchange a hundred francs?"
24:11 Pablo Torre? His voice is exactly the same. Little David Sampson is exactly the same voice.
24:14 Speaker 02 I don't know what you did as children.
24:15 Pablo Torre? He's marginally smaller.
24:16 Speaker 03 I watched TV. I wasn't abused like you guys.
24:21 Speaker 03 Watched TV and got girls, man.
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28:04 Speaker 03 I think about that a lot when I'm raising my kids, about what am I overreacting to? And is it appropriate to overreact to it? Because like... The not watching TV thing, I don't imagine that either of you would unplug the TVs when your kids were home.
28:21 Pablo Torre? We monitor screen time, but we are not trying to put locks up.
28:25 Speaker 03 And so I think that's probably like AI probably falls in that category now where it's like, I I'm vigilant about my kids in school. I mean, not using it, right? So.
28:36 Speaker 02 Not using AI?
28:37 Speaker 03 They really don't have much interest in playing with it. It's like just interest in using it to help them with their schoolwork. And it's like, you can't do that, but like, obvious, or it seems obvious to me that by the time they are in the workforce, it's going to be something that it'll be better to be good at than not, which is like.
28:57 Speaker 02 So then why don't you allow them?
28:59 Speaker 03 Right, I know, that's what I'm saying. Because, because I believe that there are skills that you need to develop, like writing and like, reading and summarizing things yourself, like those things are skills that I think you need to develop. Maybe they won't need to develop them. It's like how, um, I I'm not sure how important typing is going to be going forward.
29:19 Speaker 02 It's not even taught anymore.
29:20 Speaker 03 Right, yeah.
29:21 Speaker 02 Cursive is not taught anymore.
29:22 Pablo Torre? Well, penmanship, let alone typing.
29:24 Speaker 03 Right.
29:24 Pablo Torre? Remember, I mean, God, right? Kids today will never know the pain of trying to write a cursive Z.
29:33 Speaker 02 People don't recognize what that is.
29:35 Pablo Torre? I don't, I barely recognize it.
29:37 Speaker 03 You you can't predict it, and I think that like you guys would both, it seems like you attribute some of your academic success to the fact that your parents forced you to avoid TV, right?
29:48 Pablo Torre? Yeah, by the way, the the typing thing is interesting because one of my superpowers is fast typing. And that is now increasingly obsolete because like.
29:57 Speaker 03 So you became an intellect in part because you weren't allowed to watch TV. And David, learn, learn the scheme and scam. They're like, we're gonna take the course, and he's like, I'm gonna look around, and try to sneak and steal some stuff.
30:10 Speaker 02 I was always doing the workaround.
30:13 Pablo Torre? David was burgling his own home.
30:16 Speaker 02 It's, you happen to be 100% accurate. And I'm not the only kid who goes through his parents' stuff looking for things.
30:22 Speaker 03 Oh, yeah, it's Christmas time, every year, Christmas time.
30:25 Speaker 02 But I was not interested in some of the things like little maquettes.
30:28 Speaker 03 What's that?
30:29 Speaker 02 Uh, little sculptures, like a little Henry Moore maquette, like a little sculpture this big that you could just. Whatever. So, no.
30:36 Pablo Torre? Raised by international spies, literally, is what I'm getting.
30:39 Speaker 02 What I was interested in.
30:41 Speaker 03 Macchets.
30:42 Speaker 02 Was, was the little TV.
30:43 Pablo Torre? Just a Walther PP7 with a silencer.
30:46 Speaker 03 That sounds like weapons.
30:48 Pablo Torre? RCP 90, I'm assuming, GoldenEye weapons now?
30:51 Speaker 02 You shouldn't need to find out what a macquet is. It's a pretty well-known word.
30:55 Speaker 03 No, it's not.
30:56 Pablo Torre? I.
30:56 Speaker 03 I've never heard macquet.
30:57 Speaker 02 Never heard the word macquet?
30:58 Speaker 03 Never heard macquet.
30:59 Speaker 02 Hold on, let me just go.
31:00 Speaker 03 It sounds like a knickknack to me.
31:01 Speaker 02 No, a knickknack, okay.
31:02 Pablo Torre? A little bit pattywhack.
31:03 Speaker 03 I mean.
31:05 Speaker 02 It's an, it's a year's worth of salary for the three of us, is what them knickknacks are.
31:09 Pablo Torre? A macquet is a small, three-dimensional model or preliminary sketch of a larger piece of art, such as a sculpture or building.
31:16 Speaker 02 Wow.
31:17 Pablo Torre? Yeah, yeah. So it's basically.
31:18 Speaker 02 What's you making it up?
31:19 Pablo Torre? No, no, no.
31:20 Speaker 03 Oh, no, we didn't think you were making it up. I just never heard of a macquet before.
31:22 Pablo Torre? What this is, though.
31:23 Speaker 03 Sounds like McDonald's meal.
31:25 Pablo Torre? It, it is, it's kind of like, yeah, like a Happy Meal version of a rich guy's favorite thing.
31:32 Speaker 02 They can be, they're very valuable.
31:34 Pablo Torre? You were hammered, right?
31:35 Speaker 02 They're, they're, they're very interesting pieces of, of art and pieces of sculpture. They're wonderful to live with. But my point was different, is that I always knew at a young age what, how to maximize my time to get exactly what I wanted. And what I wanted was to not give them the last word and me having to do my homework all night. Or phone time was a big thing.
31:56 Speaker 03 Yeah.
31:56 Speaker 02 Where it wasn't, I didn't have a cellphone, obviously. So I'd be on the phone trying to be popular with a girl or a guy. And then all of a sudden, your mom gets on the phone.
32:06 Pablo Torre? Mm-hmm.
32:06 Speaker 02 And that, because she would set a time.
32:08 Speaker 03 Right.
32:08 Speaker 02 And I, my, she, I don't know how she knew when the six minutes was up, but somehow, I don't know, she was counting down. So. Six minutes per call.
32:16 Speaker 03 What were, what was she afraid of? Six minutes. She was, she was just like, we can't have David having friends.
32:22 Pablo Torre? Minute seven.
32:23 Speaker 03 Like, what?
32:24 Speaker 02 I never, I was never allowed to have sleepovers.
32:25 Speaker 03 But I, I guess I understand, while I may not agree wholeheartedly with the TV idea, I understand why they'd be like, alright, you can't watch TV unlimited, like, that makes sense. I don't understand why you can't talk to friends, or they're just.
32:37 Speaker 02 There's homework to do.
32:38 Speaker 03 Oh, okay. So it wasn't about, if you had finished your homework, she would let you talk?
32:42 Speaker 02 There's always, I never, I never was able to, because then there's a book report or a book to read, or an extra thing to do.
32:47 Pablo Torre? You went to a very fancy school.
32:49 Speaker 03 Do you ever think about the cost? Because like, it feels like both you guys see these experiences as being beneficial. But nothing comes without a price. Do you think that there was a cost to? Being raised in that way, like a negative.
33:03 Speaker 02 Do you? I mean, I, I find myself to, uh, I have friends now. You know, one or two or a half. And so, no, I, I think that the benefit of the disciplined life I had is it made me disciplined.
33:17 Pablo Torre? I would say that I'd probably be less enamored of weed as an adult if I was not sort of like told to, you know, be at the other end of the spectrum when it came to just like.
33:29 Speaker 03 I generally think that this is not just true of this conversation about the things that impact us, but just overall, I think that we often want to make a domino style cause and effect to the things that happen in our lives because we like to tell stories and movies and TV shows and all that stuff. It's like, we want to be able to tell that story. But oftentimes I think the results of things that we think are because of one thing are not at all because of that. So like, get back to the point of saying that like, I thought that my hard work made me an athlete until I realized that like, eh, my hard work made me an NFL player, but like, I was always going to be a better athlete than most people. I'm guessing that David, your disposition is probably that of someone who is more prone
34:12 Speaker 03 to discipline because we could have these situations. Um, I remember with my, my wife, with our kids, like I was pretty strict about, early on about like what they were eating and how much sugar was around. And she was like, well, what's just going to happen is then they're going to get out into the world and then they'll be free to eat a whole bunch of sugar. And I was just like, well, actually I don't think we know how any of this will impact them. Like this could lead to someone who's like incredibly disciplined because they had a disciplined upbringing, or we could tell the other story where it's like, oh, I was so disciplined with that. Then you get out of the house, what that crack talking about? Let me, let me, let me, let me holler a couple of rocks. Let me.
34:53 Speaker 03 Like, I, I don't know. I just think that we, we want to be able to explain things.
34:56 Pablo Torre? I like that Lifetime movie though, What That Crack Talking About.
35:00 Speaker 02 I was allowed candy from October 31st to Thanksgiving Day. Was it during the year? And because you'd go Thanksgiving, then you'd have to pour the bag out, then it would be gone through by your parents. They'd take out everything that was not wrapped, obviously. Because it has razor blades in it, so I was told. I don't know if anyone else heard that story.
35:15 Speaker 03 Yeah, I heard it. Never actually saw it.
35:18 Speaker 02 Never.
35:19 Speaker 03 Never actually had a friend who got that razor blade candy.
35:21 Speaker 02 It's a lot of efforts, but razor blades in an apple, but I'm fine, whatever it is. And then one a night. And so anything over, let's say Thanksgiving is November 24th, you get 25 pieces of candy. The 31st and then through November 24th, and then the rest gets thrown away.
35:37 Speaker 03 So, and now you obviously are, from what I understand.
35:40 Speaker 02 A candy addict.
35:42 Speaker 03 So why do you think that that candy discipline resulted in you becoming an addict? And the, the no phone discipline resulted in you becoming a nerd?
35:54 Speaker 02 I'm not a nerd.
35:55 Speaker 03 I mean, I don't know how you would call it.
35:57 Speaker 02 I am not a nerd. I'm a lot of things.
35:59 Pablo Torre? Well, let's, let's, let's, let's live in this definition for a second. What do you?
36:05 Speaker 03 Or discipline, I'm sorry, you said disciplined, right? Yeah.
36:07 Pablo Torre? Okay.
36:08 Speaker 02 Wait, you're not, those aren't synonyms.
36:10 Speaker 03 No, they aren't synonyms. I was thinking about Pablo.
36:12 Pablo Torre? Okay.
36:13 Speaker 02 I don't find him nerdy either.
36:14 Pablo Torre? Thanks.
36:15 Speaker 02 Do you think you're nerdy?
36:16 Pablo Torre? Well, so that's what I wanted to live in for a second.
36:18 Speaker 03 As a relative, baby.
36:20 Pablo Torre? Okay. Compared to, uh, what NFL bound 36? 36, Dominique's screen name growing up, yeah. Classified, self classified as.
36:29 Speaker 03 That was my screen name.
36:31 Speaker 02 Give me some of that, and you made it happen? I love that.
36:36 Speaker 03 It was my screen name, it was my Black Planet page name.
36:39 Pablo Torre? We're still looking for that. We're still looking for the archive of Dominique's Black Planet profile.
36:44 Speaker 02 Did you wear 36?
36:45 Speaker 03 Um, my first year, so I graduated from high school early and went to Maryland early. And so the spring, I had 36. And then training camp came and I got 6. But yeah, that was my, so it was when I, yeah, I had 36.
37:00 Speaker 02 See, I love that. That may be the coolest story you've ever told me about yourself. Ooh, I got some stories, boy. Turn these mics off, doggy. We used to go to Vegas? Oh, whoa.
37:11 Pablo Torre? How many Franks were involved?
37:15 Speaker 03 Man, you can't, you can't imagine what I could do with a, with a macanet.
37:19 Speaker 02 Not a ma- oh god.
37:21 Speaker 06 What's it called?
37:22 Speaker 02 Macquette.
37:23 Speaker 03 Oh, you, hey, it's a macquette to you, it's a macanet to me, boy.
37:28 Speaker 02 David, did you have a screen name? No. How would you, with what screen?
37:32 Speaker 03 AIM, it was, um.
37:34 Speaker 02 A well, it's the messenger, America Online. Did you ever have to come up with a code name for yourself? Uh, I stayed in hotels when I was president of the team under Jay Trotter.
37:42 Speaker 03 Nice.
37:43 Speaker 02 That was my name. Jay Trotter. Why? Uh, that's the lead character in Let It Ride.
37:49 Speaker 02 Jay Trotter, played by Richard Dreyfuss.
37:50 Speaker 03 Right, I don't think I've ever seen him.
37:52 Speaker 02 And so I was. This image that I look up from the movie be in black and white?
37:57 Speaker 03 Jay Trotter?
37:58 Speaker 02 No, it's Let It Ride from like 1991, it's a great movie. Eighty-nine.
38:01 Speaker 03 How tall is Jay Trotter?
38:03 Speaker 02 Richard Dreyfuss is not a tall guy.
38:05 Speaker 03 Okay.
38:05 Speaker 02 In real life. But, you know, the players, I don't, did you use a pseudonym?
38:09 Speaker 03 No.
38:09 Speaker 02 At team hotels? But you guys are always in for one night.
38:12 Speaker 03 Yeah, I mean, we didn't have the same situation as you guys. It was like, the hotel was pretty much.
38:16 Speaker 02 No one was trying to poison your food?
38:17 Speaker 03 No, I mean.
38:18 Speaker 02 It's not about that, it's about the phone calls.
38:20 Speaker 03 I don't think that, so like, the, the team would have the hotel, so I'm not sure that any of our names were on, not the whole hotel all the time, but sometimes, but I'm not sure that any of our names were on specific rooms. And there'd be security, so no one was let into the hotel out, because like you, you mentioned, it wasn't like you guys who were on a road trip. We come in, uh, land at like four o'clock, uh, the day before, play a football game, and don't return to the hotel. So like, we spend the night, one night there and fly out, so it's not the same.
38:49 Speaker 02 So it's a whole magilla when you check into a hotel with the baseball team, because it's a lot of rooms, much like football, but you're there for a much longer period of time, and you don't have the whole hotel, so there are people around.
38:59 Speaker 03 Yeah.
38:59 Speaker 02 But pre-cell phone, the way you'd reach players, uh, is through their hotel phone. Literally, the whole, like, hey, can I get me to room, you know, one, one, two, six, nine? So you had to have a manifest of where everyone was, so we'd get two manifests, one with the names that were with the pseudonyms, and then one with the key. Meaning who?
39:21 Speaker 03 Yeah.
39:21 Speaker 02 What?
39:21 Pablo Torre? The decoder.
39:22 Speaker 02 The decoder. So then the traveling secretary, the manager, the GM would know how to reach everybody.
39:27 Speaker 03 Our hotels were always, I would imagine, much more boring than baseball or any other sport hotel because we were in and out, we had curfews, it was, um, ran a very tight ship. And I imagine that you guys don't do this, like, I know basketball players, I don't know very many baseball players, but you're like, you're there for so long that they live their lives. So I imagine you guys have much better stories than I, like, the most fun stories we had is somebody just didn't show up to the game or skip curfew or something like that. It wasn't anything that interesting.
39:57 Speaker 02 Never you.
39:58 Speaker 03 Nah, I didn't start drinking until I was 35.
40:01 Pablo Torre? Did you know that about him?
40:03 Speaker 02 Uh, we're funny, I didn't start drinking until I was 31.
40:06 Pablo Torre? We're a bunch of nerds. I got bad news, guys, we're nerds.
40:09 Speaker 02 Wait, do you not drink now?
40:11 Pablo Torre? I drink so much less now, but I socially and happily enjoy it.
40:16 Speaker 02 The thing about hotels, I find, with players is that they are, they get very comfortable because they know they're gonna be there three nights, four nights, whatever, so they, they move into the room. And it used to be when, when I was younger, players used to share a room. And that was a huge collective bargaining issue when they wanted their own rooms because it doubled the cost. But you had grown ass men who were sharing.
40:38 Pablo Torre? Yeah, high school debate tournament style, baby.
40:40 Speaker 02 And these are professional athletes. I assume the NFL was like that too, in the 70s and 80s.
40:45 Speaker 03 Oh, probably, yeah, I'm sure, NFL is notoriously cheap, they probably were like that in the 70s and 80s. It wasn't, um, training camp, my rookie year training camp, I shared a room on the, on the preseason games, but, excuse me, after that, we were all by ourselves. I imagine, college, we share rooms.
41:03 Speaker 02 Even the top schools like Alabama?
41:05 Pablo Torre? Road roommates was a thing.
41:07 Speaker 03 I don't know, I can't speak for them, but, and I, it may have changed now, but when I was in college, we shared rooms, which that led to more interesting stories.
41:15 Pablo Torre? I remember, we did an episode with Nate Tice, who was Russell Wilson's road roommate.
41:19 Speaker 03 Right.
41:19 Pablo Torre? At Wisconsin. Which is to say that, yeah, this is a proud tradition that even, you know.
41:23 Speaker 03 Yeah, maybe things have changed now, that it seems to be even more and more money in college sports, but yeah, that was, and when you're a college kid, your decision making is a little bit inhibited, not that when you get to NFL, all of a sudden it gets better, but like. Yeah, me and my roommate definitely had friends over sometimes, which was not a smart idea.
41:46 Speaker 02 What's the tennis movie that we just watched? And I'm totally blanking.
41:49 Pablo Torre? It was Zendaya?
41:51 Speaker 02 I'm so.
41:52 Speaker 03 Challengers.
41:53 Speaker 02 Challengers.
41:53 Speaker 03 I haven't seen it.
41:54 Pablo Torre? That's good.
41:55 Speaker 02 There's a fantastic threesome.
41:57 Speaker 03 Oh, yeah. I heard about that.
41:59 Speaker 02 With the two.
41:59 Speaker 03 I heard people complain that it was like not, um.
42:02 Pablo Torre? They didn't actually pay it off?
42:03 Speaker 03 Yeah, that it wasn't as exciting as they had like sold it to be.
42:06 Speaker 02 Oh, I like the payoff was her payoff.
42:09 Speaker 03 You liked it?
42:09 Pablo Torre? David is grinning way too much.
42:11 Speaker 03 I feel really uncomfortable.
42:13 Pablo Torre? Yeah.
42:13 Speaker 02 You shouldn't. It's a great scene.
42:15 Speaker 03 No, no, no. I'm uncomfortable with how excited you are because I haven't seen the scene. So I don't know how to react. I don't know if I should be agreeing with you or.
42:22 Speaker 02 You didn't like the payoff?
42:23 Pablo Torre? You're Zendaya in a visual of this. Yeah, you're sitting in between two people who are ever closer.
42:30 Speaker 03 I am, obviously.
42:32 Speaker 02 Who are trying to be close to you and you can do spoiler alerts for that movie. It's.
42:36 Pablo Torre? I think so.
42:37 Speaker 02 It is she, they're trying to do a threesome.
42:39 Speaker 03 Right.
42:40 Speaker 02 And they all want to be with her and she wants them to do it themselves.
42:43 Pablo Torre? Trying to do a threesome? Is that the verb?
42:44 Speaker 03 I think you have them.
42:45 Speaker 02 Trying to have a threesome, be a threesome.
42:46 Speaker 03 I don't think you do them.
42:47 Speaker 02 I say, well, you do do them and, and the payoff for her was that they got all dressed up and ready to go. And then she said, good night, boys.
42:56 Speaker 03 Uh huh.
42:56 Speaker 02 And left the room. That's a pretty powerful payoff.
43:01 Pablo Torre? That is a figurative payoff.
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46:32 Pablo Torre? Let's rank our worst decisions. David, you go first.
46:39 Speaker 02 My worst decision was going public with the fact that one of the things we used to tell our players was to pleasure themselves before checking into their road hotel. Because we thought, I thought, that it would make them get in trouble less. And it's, and so...
46:54 Pablo Torre? Dominique and I did an episode about post nut clarity.
46:57 Speaker 02 Yes, you did.
46:58 Pablo Torre? And this is the same philosophy?
47:00 Speaker 02 It was, it was the same philosophy. And it was a, it should have been kept in-house.
47:04 Pablo Torre? Yeah, I feel like, hey, guys, can you, can you just jack off real quick? Feels like an HR thing.
47:10 Speaker 02 Right. So I, I would have done it differently. I don't disagree with why I did what I did. And I don't disagree with the results. I think we only had like three or four arrests in 18 years. Not terrible, so.
47:26 Speaker 02 You stand by the science of it. Exactly. About 30 divorces, three or four arrests. A few restraining orders, you know, just to Tuesday. Three or four arrests.
47:38 Pablo Torre? Think if they hadn't jacked off.
47:40 Speaker 02 It would have been even more. I agree.
47:44 Pablo Torre? So the players were like, okay.
47:47 Speaker 02 I mean, I don't think that they were influenced by it. You think?
47:51 Pablo Torre? No. When you went public with this, where did this go public?
47:56 Speaker 02 So I was giving a, either a speech. YMCA. I was doing something where the audience just wasn't necessarily ready for this conversation. And I regret doing that.
48:10 Pablo Torre? Yeah.
48:10 Speaker 02 Nice. I don't view... That's a pretty, I mean, that's mild as far as worst decisions are concerned. Well, I mean, personally? That's professional. You're asking me if I've made bad personal decisions? Oh, no, no, no, I, I... As I sit here divorced? I mean, what, what do you mean? That was a great decision. Which, to get divorced? And to get married. I stand by every decision I've made. They're just not all great. But I wouldn't redo any of them. I don't like people who say, "If I had to do it again, I'd do it differently."
48:39 Speaker 03 Oh, really? Why not?
48:40 Speaker 02 Because I don't like that. You should think of that before you do it the first time.
48:43 Speaker 03 I don't like people who say, "I have no regrets because this is where I was supposed to be." Like, when someone asks you that question, that's the whole point. It's like, I don't know.
48:54 Speaker 02 What are your... I have no regrets. What are your regrets?
48:56 Pablo Torre? You have zero regrets?
48:57 Speaker 02 I have myriad mistakes and zero regrets.
49:00 Speaker 03 So you are fine with telling the YMCA audience that you wanted your players?
49:06 Speaker 02 It's not ideal, I grant you. You know, I don't love the fact that I went into an all-black church trying to get votes for the stadium, and I stood up there and I said, "Can I get an amen?" I don't love that I did that, but I did.
49:20 Pablo Torre? I didn't know that you did that.
49:22 Speaker 02 Oh, I gave a whole sermon.
49:23 Pablo Torre? Your mistake is in now telling us that you did that. You should regret telling us that.
49:28 Speaker 02 I gave a sermon.
49:29 Pablo Torre? What the [bleep] does that?
49:31 Speaker 02 I gave a sermon to a major black church in Miami because I needed their support for public money for the ballpark.
49:38 Speaker 03 So, hold on.
49:39 Speaker 02 I was the only white guy in there.
49:40 Speaker 03 Jewish.
49:42 Speaker 02 I am Jewish. I am white.
49:44 Speaker 03 The white is the second...
49:47 Pablo Torre? Okay, so, because we know, Dominique, that David regrets nothing in terms of his process, even though the outcome may not be what he desired. What was your... How did you dress? What was your approach?
50:01 Speaker 02 So, how I dressed is I went to visit a black tailor.
50:06 Pablo Torre? I said we weren't gonna cut anything.
50:07 Speaker 03 Oh, no!
50:08 Speaker 02 Hold on.
50:09 Speaker 03 No!
50:10 Speaker 02 I'm telling you what I did. And I had a suit made for me by Andre Dawson's tailor. So I looked like Andre Dawson, and it was awesome. If you know The Hawk, he's the most impeccable dresser you'll ever meet.
50:25 Pablo Torre? He was probably at Levitar's wedding, as a pure side note.
50:28 Speaker 02 Was he really?
50:29 Pablo Torre? Yeah, Andre Dawson.
50:30 Speaker 02 He is just a wonderful dresser. He was the coolest guy in the world. I don't think you'll see it on Google, but just very, very good dresser.
50:36 Pablo Torre? Oh, yeah, we see. How many buttons did your suit have?
50:40 Speaker 02 It's the only suit I ever had. It had six buttons.
50:43 Speaker 03 Oh, what year was that?
50:45 Speaker 02 This was 2008.
50:48 Speaker 02 2008. And so we needed the votes, so I had a-
50:51 Pablo Torre? You're a [bleep] king of comedy.
50:54 Speaker 03 What is this, not colorful?
50:55 Speaker 02 I can't even. I had a consigliere who was Cuban, and we had a plan of all the different people we had to get votes from. So we went to the Cubans, we went to the non-Cuban Hispanics. 100%, I had to go get one personally made, a guy of Adda. So I had to wear that to the Cuban one. I think it's guy of Adda, I don't really know how to say it.
51:14 Pablo Torre? But I appreciate you increasing the flexibility of your armpits while you were saying it.
51:20 Speaker 02 You guys are funny, but I did give a, I did give the sermon, and I did, I, I felt like I had the room enough.
51:26 Pablo Torre? What does a sermon?
51:28 Speaker 02 It was about all the things that this 65-inch white Jewish guy could do for them by having a ballpark built with their money. This is what I will deliver for you.
51:38 Pablo Torre? You are a prosperity gospel panderer.
51:41 Speaker 02 I was, what's the, uh, this would have been great if I had it, had it right in my head, the guy, uh, the, the Music Man, and it starts with T, which stands for Trouble, Music City. What's the main character? Hugh Jackman just played him. Oh my god!
51:54 Pablo Torre? No idea.
51:55 Speaker 02 Um, you really don't know? You don't know either?
51:57 Pablo Torre? Somehow-
51:57 Speaker 03 Wolverine?
51:58 Pablo Torre? I don't know.
52:00 Pablo Torre? So, the, the, the, the thing, the thing, you know David Samson's a method black preacher when he doesn't know the, remember, the name of the Music Man character?
52:09 Speaker 02 What is the name?
52:09 Speaker 03 Harold Hill!
52:10 Speaker 02 Harold Hill! You never heard that name? Anyway, so, so, that's, I went in, and I am trying to explain to this large audience about what public funding means, and I'm standing in my suit and in my pointed shoes.
52:25 Pablo Torre? You got pointy shoes.
52:26 Speaker 02 Long, pointy shoes that were like size 10 and I'm a size 8.
52:29 Speaker 03 Suit was like, uh, like a black or, or blue or, like a normal dark-
52:35 Speaker 02 I think it was-
52:36 Speaker 03 Tan, maybe?
52:37 Speaker 02 I think it was tan.
52:38 Speaker 03 Okay, that's straight, that's good, that's good.
52:39 Pablo Torre? You went Obama?
52:40 Speaker 03 I didn't-
52:41 Speaker 02 It was-
52:41 Pablo Torre? You went six Bud and Obama.
52:43 Speaker 03 We should have got you a church lady hat.
52:45 Speaker 02 It was something.
52:46 Pablo Torre? A fascinator.
52:47 Speaker 02 It was going great, and I had, I, I had eyes with my Cuban consigliere. It was, so-
52:53 Pablo Torre? They were giving you amens.
52:55 Speaker 02 I, I-
52:56 Pablo Torre? They did that?
52:56 Speaker 02 No, I just had, I had the view that I had their attention. I had the view that they were looking at me as though I was
53:02 Pablo Torre? Right.
53:03 Speaker 02 one of them, and so I built up to this crescendo, and I look over at the bishop. His name was Bishop Curry. Bishop Curry was his name in Miami. And I look at the bishop, then I look out at the audience. I look back at the Cuban consigliere and I look at the crowd. I say, can I get an amen? And then I walked out.
53:26 Speaker 02 And it was awesome. Side note, we got all the black commissioner votes.
53:31 Speaker 03 Did they? Oh, so they did say, they said amen.
53:34 Speaker 02 Oh, we got the amen. We got the votes. We got it all.
53:37 Speaker 03 Wow. I was gonna ask you, have you ever been pandered to?
53:41 Speaker 02 Probably.
53:43 Speaker 03 You don't know? Like, I feel like when I'm being pandered to, I recognize it and I dislike it.
53:47 Pablo Torre? When you're pandered to, does it look like this photo of Bishop Michael Curry?
53:53 Pablo Torre? I'm gonna put this on the YouTube channel, but this, this is him?
53:57 Speaker 02 It was, it's Victor Curry.
53:59 Pablo Torre? Sorry, Victor Curry. Not Bishop Curry.
54:01 Speaker 02 It's Bishop Victor Curry.
54:02 Pablo Torre? Oh. Victor Curry is the author of A Charge to Keep I Have: Fulfilling Your Life's Purpose, which feels like a book that all of us might have read in our most vulnerable moments, hanging from a bar for hours at a time.
54:18 Speaker 02 You guys, it's happy, I'm happy to be with you guys again. You make me think of things I hadn't thought of in a very, very long time.
54:24 Pablo Torre? How long have we known David and we only now get the amen story?
54:28 Speaker 03 Whenever we're together, um, I think David thinks that this is an example of me like pandering to him, but it's not. Whenever we're together, David's always the star.
54:40 Pablo Torre? 100%.
54:40 Speaker 03 Of, of the three of us, people would guess, I would assume that the least interesting and least entertaining of us would be the former club president. Not the people who are on TV for a living or played professional sports. But always, it is always David is somehow the star of the show.
55:01 Speaker 02 I think we're now coming in tied for second, because Pablo is now at a different level. He has left us in the dust.
55:07 Speaker 03 You talking about old Peabody over here?
55:09 Pablo Torre? Dominique was trying to pay you.
55:11 Speaker 02 Talk to us going forward.
55:12 Pablo Torre? He was, he was trying to. I was also about to see David as Ara Zendea, and instead.
55:19 Speaker 03 I had it in my head.
55:20 Pablo Torre? Swung back around. We're gonna Photoshop that. We're gonna have our graphic squad Photoshop that.
55:27 Speaker 03 No, thank you.
55:28 Pablo Torre? It's gonna be really, uh...
55:30 Speaker 02 It's gonna be funny, actually. Sounds like a waste of graphic squad money. Hey, listen, welcome to Metallica.
55:49 Pablo Torre? At the end of every episode of Pablo Doria Finds Out, even one that is entirely live to tape, I don't think we're making a single edit to this because I want people to understand what it's like for us to sit at a table together, because it is this. What did we find out today? Gentlemen?
56:03 Speaker 03 The snacking around here is depressing, boy. I found that out. That [BLEEP] is so hungry.
56:09 Pablo Torre? Episode we just did, you just are mad that we didn't have the good snacks.
56:12 Speaker 03 And it takes a lot of energy to be this entertaining.
56:15 Speaker 02 I found out that Dominique believes that in order to be a professional athlete, you have to have some sort of nature versus nurture. And I am still thinking about the parents of big leaguers who we had, whose parents were not athletic at all, and they're big leaguers, or the people like Steffi Graf and Andre Agassi, who have kids who may or may not be professional athletes, Michael Jordan's kids. They tried. They didn't make it.
56:41 Pablo Torre? My old friend.
56:42 Speaker 03 I think, I mean, you need to go do some DNA tests on these people who somehow became athletes without a shred of athleticism in there. They might find out something that they don't want to know. Like, go ahead, go ahead and look at the NFL draft. Go ahead and look at the NBA draft. Them last names get more and more familiar. I think that there was a time when they was different.
57:02 Pablo Torre? No, and now it's crazy.
57:03 Speaker 03 It's absurd now.
57:04 Pablo Torre? In the NBA...
57:05 Speaker 03 And even if you're not, even if it's not someone else who played, like, your mom was a college athlete. Like, it just, it just doesn't happen anymore, where it's just like, my dad was a plumber. And I think a part of it is that women's athletics has grown to the point. I think a lot of times, the athletic gene could come from your mother. You wouldn't recognize that because there was a time when there was not, like, adequate women's sports. And so you'd be like, hey, this kid came out of nowhere. He's an athlete. His dad ain't [BLEEP], but he can ball. Like, eh, his mom probably was a tremendous athlete, but didn't have the opportunity. So I'm guessing that these big leaguers that you talk about, maybe, maybe something a little different happening over there.
57:42 Pablo Torre? The most prolific university when it comes to generating NBA draft picks is, in fact, the University of former professional basketball players, assembled together as one group. It's crazy how many, how many nepo athletes there are.
57:58 Pablo Torre? We're all kind of Yao Ming being produced by the Chinese government, allegedly.
58:02 Speaker 03 Yep.
58:04 Pablo Torre? What I found out today is that David Samson has probably rummaged around the drawers in his office and found all sorts of things that are of value to various Europeans.
58:15 Speaker 03 Mate, he hasn't found that much, because I tell you what, they [bleep] drawers, it's a shambles. [bleep] a couple of bags of nuts and an empty [bleep] beef jerky container. What are we doing? It's depressing, it's sad.
58:29 Pablo Torre? There's a, there's a, a matketa of jerky. There's a smaller jerky that stands in for the full-size jerky.
58:37 Speaker 03 Tough times, man. Yeah, it is tough times, man. Jerky, man, that just reminds me of David Samson's YMCA story.
58:52 Pablo Torre? This has been Pablo Torre Finds Out, a Meadowlark Media production.
58:58 Pablo Torre? And I'll talk to you next time.
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