Jordan Belfort: ON Being The Wolf Of Wall Street - How To Spot Limiting Beliefs & Changing How You Define Success

On this episode of On Purpose, I sat down with Jordan Belfort. Jordan is an American author, motivational speaker, and former stockbroker. Jordan’s best-selling book The Wolf of Wall Street was made into an Oscar-nominated film directed by Martin Scorsese and starring Leonardo DiCaprio. Jordan shares what stops intelligent people from making money, creating entrepreneurial opportunities for himself at 12-years-old, why we acquire limiting beliefs and not buying into the hype of money & fame. Text Jay Shetty 310-997-4177 See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Jay Shetty?

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• 0:43Jay Shetty?

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• 1:26Jay Shetty?

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• 2:01Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by AG1. Are you feeling September reset too? Shorter days, longer to-do lists, earlier alarms, all those routines you promised to yourself you'd pick back up. It can feel like your whole life is recalibrating. And when everything around you is changing, it helps to have a few things you can rely on. AG1 Next Gen is one of those easy habits to keep. It's the clinically-backed, comprehensive daily health drink that supports your gut health, energy production, and foundational nutrition all in one scoop. AG1's ingredients are sourced from quality partners for absorption, potency, and nutrient density to deliver the foundational nutrition your body needs. And alongside a proper diet,

• 2:45Jay Shetty?

  AG1 Next Gen meets 94% of nutrient requirements and it's clinically shown to enrich the gut microbiome. For a limited time, save 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro at drinkag1.com/onpurpose. That's drinkag1.com/onpurpose.

• 3:10Speaker 01

  It could be something where your parents says, "Money is the root of all evil." And you're like, "Oh, you're 300, oh, I guess so." And you adopt it. You know, the thing is, I always say is that your brain, we're not born with spyware. And these limiting beliefs that get inserted in us almost, right? It's like, unless you're really aware, you don't have a natural protection against those limiting beliefs.

• 3:39Jay Shetty?

  Hey, everyone. Welcome back to On Purpose. I'm genuinely so grateful that you take out time, energy from your day to listen, learn, and grow. Remember, I'm trying to help you master self, work, and love. And every week, I invite guests that I think are going to help us uncover new solutions, think about new ideas, and push us towards deeper thought. And you know what I'm like? I love bringing guests onto the show that are going to challenge the way we think, that have lived very different lives from me, that we can dive into and learn from their experiences. And today's guest is someone I am really excited to have because I've been wanting to have this conversation for at least... I think about maybe nine years. So for me, it's a big moment to have this guest today

• 4:22Jay Shetty?

  sitting here at the podcast. And he is none other than number one sales trainer in the world, the bestselling author of the iconic book, and of course, movie, The Wolf of Wall Street, and the new host of the Wolf's Den podcast, which I highly recommend you check out. Welcome, Jordan Belfort. Jordan, thank you so much for being here.

• 4:40Speaker 01

  My pleasure.

• 4:40Jay Shetty?

  So I have a story to tell you.

• 4:42Speaker 01

  Let's hear it.

• 4:43Jay Shetty?

  When I was speaking about philosophy, science, spirituality, all of these things, when I got involved at the age of 18 in this world, so since the past 13 years, someone's video came across me. That video was yours. And I saw one of your videos where people had been glamorizing the life that you lived, having seen The Wolf of Wall Street, read the book. And you, in that interview, in the most humble, nice way, were talking about how you didn't want other people to go ahead and do the same.

• 5:12Speaker 01

  Right, yeah.

• 5:13Jay Shetty?

  And I actually did a talk, which was based on The Wolf of Wall Street, at a university in London, at the London School of Economics.

• 5:20Speaker 01

  Really?

• 5:20Jay Shetty?

  And I used clips from interviews by you to share this incredible point of how you had changed your views of success. So I've been fascinated with you.

• 5:29Speaker 01

  Well, I think that, you know, the problem, not a problem, but the reality is, is that some of the stuff that I, that when you see it on screen, it's, they don't glamorize it. It's glamorous. It just is. And the problem is, is when you try to take something and, you know, you say, "Oh, it's glamorizing, you know, and blame Marty Scorsese", I think it takes away, because I think there's a lot to learn. And as I said, I don't want people living that life. I mean, I was young, and I did it at the time. It made sense to me then, because people do crazy things, right? But I think that on most levels, when kids, and I'm really for young people, right? They watch the movie. I think most people get it.

• 6:11Speaker 01

  I really, I think the vast majority say, "Wow, I love some of the stuff, the camaraderie, I love the money he made, the entrepreneurial spirit, I trained the salesman, all these kids coming from nothing", and I think they're smart enough to know that, you know, I'd love to have that. That thrill, but I don't wanna go into the public, people lose money or people lose their, their, their, their souls for a while, seriously. Where, you know, with all the drugs, I mean, that was, you know, disastrous for my life, right? Um, so I, I, it bothers me sometimes, I think, when like I, when I think the, the new, the media almost makes it, amplifies that by trying to condemn it rather than taking it for what it really is, which is, hey, here's what, you know, this really good and is really bad, like in most things, the yin and the yang, right?

• 6:55Speaker 01

  So, yeah, I mean, I, I feel a responsibility, no, I do, cuz, you know, I don't want people that are in their teens and twenties, like, I wanna be like, that's, it's not what you wanna do, but there's a lot to be learned from it.

• 7:06Jay Shetty?

  Absolutely, no, I completely agree, and I wanna go back to the beginning, I was reading somewhere that you actually set out to wanna be a dentist, which I thought, which I know my, a lot of my friends back in London who are dentists right now are gonna be inspired

• 7:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 7:19Jay Shetty?

  by your story, tell me how that was an aspiration and then how it's changed.

• 7:23Speaker 01

  So, basically, it wasn't that I wanted to be a dentist, I wanted to be rich. I, I always wanted to be rich, I did, I came from a poor family, not, not very poor, but lower middle class, right? And my, my uncle was a dentist and he had a lot of money. My mother, since I was two years old, sitting in the high chairs, she's like spoon feeding me applesauce, like, and she's like, the only no way to wealth is you gotta be a doctor, or a dentist, it's like fricking hypnosis, right? It's like, it's like, it's like they insert that belief in you, you know, I'm sure, but you know, the belief systems, right? So you're hearing that, so when I was twenty years old, graduating from college, if you ever asked me what I wanted to do, I'd say, I wanna be rich for a living. It wasn't like I, I didn't know what I wanted to do, like most young people. So I said, well, if I go to medical school, as a very good student, if I go to medical school,

• 8:05Speaker 01

  ten more years, I'll go crazy, I'll be a dentist, four more years, I'll be Dr. Belfort, right? And it'll all be good, so I, you know, I apply, I get in, so my first day of dental school, it's the Baltimore College of Dental Surgery in Maryland, right? So the dean stands up, he's like this white haired guy, white jacket, very dental looking, I go, wow, that's a dentist, right? I'm looking around the audience, a hundred kids, everyone's pretty bright eyed and bushed, I'm like, okay. So far, so good, so the dean's like, you know, welcome to the Baltimore College of Dental Surgery, you'll be proud to be here, dentistry's an amazing profession, and blah, blah, blah, okay, and he goes, but let me say this. The golden age of dentistry is over. If you're here to make a lot of money, you're probably in the wrong place. I'm like, what the hell? I'm like, I had, excuse me, I got up and I walked out the first day.

• 8:46Jay Shetty?

  Your first day?

• 8:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, I dropped out. I dropped out and I, I couldn't bear to tell my mom, you know, so I was like, oh my. She's like, how's school? I go, it's pretty good. You know, like, and then find my money round, I had to go back home. That's how I ended up getting into the world of sales and ultimately Wall Street, you know?

• 8:59Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, absolutely.

• 9:00Speaker 01

  My dental story, you know?

• 9:01Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, no, I get that. I, I grew up, I always said this, I grew up having three choices to be a doctor, a lawyer or a failure.

• 9:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, right.

• 9:07Jay Shetty?

  To my family and extended family and those were my three options.

• 9:10Speaker 01

  Very, very similar to my family.

• 9:11Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, that's, and, and same, I came from that lower middle class background.

• 9:14Speaker 01

  My brother's a lawyer, my mother's a lawyer.

• 9:15Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, so all my cousins are doctors, literally every single one of them. Maybe one's a pharmacist, but that was the culture.

• 9:21Speaker 01

  The black sheep of the family.

• 9:22Jay Shetty?

  Exactly, exactly. How did you find that when you were breaking out to do something different? And I don't want to go into the, the goal yet, but just your process where you saw people, lawyers around you, but you were breaking away from that. Was that something that was easy to do for you because your goal was so set? Or was it difficult at first to set?

• 9:41Speaker 01

  Oh, no, no, it was, it was something that was always part of me. In other words, from a really young age, I was one of those sort of, the kids that had the lemonade stand. At the age of eight, I was knocking on doors with a paper route, expanding my paper route. At the age of 10, I used to shovel driveways after snowstorms in New York, make 20 bucks a pop. At 12, I saw David Copperfield on TV and I wanted to be a magician. So I started doing children's parties and then I actually hit it really big at 16. I started selling ices blanket to blanket on a massive beach called Jones Beach in New York, right? So I went there, I started making about two, three, $400 per day.

• 10:16Jay Shetty?

  At 16?

• 10:17Speaker 01

  This is in the seventies, yeah, in the seventies, which is like over a thousand a day now. And that changed my life. Once I started making that and I had a lot of money as a kid, my, my teens, I linked up in my mind, you know, I had this belief because I watched my parents struggle. You know, I, they're brilliant people, right? Hardworking, educated and broke.

• 10:35Speaker 01

  I'm like, wait a second. I'm like, what's, what's missing from this picture? Like, why would two hardworking people, wildly educated, right? Um, with career, like, you know, with degree, why would they not make money? And, and I saw a couple of things that I thought really were instrumental. Number one was the, uh, sort of, uh, you know, no, no risk-taking. They were risk averse, completely depression-er mentality. That was number one. Number two, they thought that things like sales and persuasion and marketing were inherently evil. There was something wrong with it. So because of that, they never tried to market their skills or sell, but the people, so they worked for other people for a paycheck. And, and then also they were never, they even bought, never bought a home. They weren't, they just, it's

• 11:16Speaker 01

  very depression-er, and they were wonderful, amazing parents. But so I saw those things, and I think what happens with most people is that you grow up and you, you see your parents' beliefs, and either you adopt them, or you go the exact opposite way. I went the exact opposite way. It always did. So it was not a leap that, it was like, just, it was actually a blip to go to dental school, but I, it was mostly out of confusion, I think. And, you know, I was like, I, I liked, I also, because always a girl involved, right? So my, it's always a girl. There's always something about it. I can trace back to every mistake made to a girl from five years old. I have a scar on my, my forehead. If my, where a girl was chasing me, I ran into a brick wall on a, so it's always been, uh, it got worse over time, you know? Right? And now I finally got the best woman in the world, my, for the last 11 years, and my life's infinitely better because of it,

• 11:59Speaker 01

  right? But, um, but no, no, seriously, my girlfriend, she was still in, um, in DC. I was like, oh, I'll be near her for one day, you know? And we broke up, of course, right after my graduation.

• 12:10Jay Shetty?

  No way. I love that. Why, why do you think it is, those two things you brought up, why do you think it is that we have this inherent belief that sales, persuasion, negotiation, marketing are evil? Like, where does that come from?

• 12:25Speaker 01

  I, I think there's, first of all, there was, if you go back to the sixties, especially, right? It's a time when there was this sort of counterculture was coming of age in the, in like the hippie mark in the, you know, if you go back to Mad Men, perfect example. Did you watch, you ever watched the TV? Remember how there was always just like, "Oh, you're an ad guy." It was like, it was a, so back in the sixties, right? And that, so that was pretty accurate. And in my, I was always like, "Oh, it's like the lowest thing. You're an ad guy, you're, you know, what do you do? You manipulate people, right?" And, and I think the world has evolved somewhat right now. And, but that was a big part. My parents, you know, do you have, do you have door-to-door salesmen in London? We do have, yeah, yeah. Right, well, all right. So, okay, so in, a lot in New York. When the door-to-door salesman would knock on my door,

• 13:08Speaker 01

  it was like, "Get out the shotguns, the filler brush man." They want, my parents hated salespeople, you know? And I, and I, my mother thought there was something, my mother's very, um, not, not that she's spiritual, because she's not. She's religious a little bit, but it's more about customs and then natural spirituality. But I, my mother is something about, in her mind, it's, sales and marketing is related with being shallow and not depth. And, and the problem with that is that selling something and it, and the product itself having depth, they're not mutually exclusive. In other words, you could advertise and sell an amazing product that gives people great benefits and amazing value, and then it's congruent, it's an awesome thing. Or you can use that as in a deceptive way

• 13:52Speaker 01

  to sell things that have no value and little benefit. So, yet in her mind, she flinked it up as a blanket. And I think that in any aspect of life, whether it's sales, at any belief you have about money, um, life, love, extremes are never really good. Because the truth usually always lies somewhere in the middle, right? So I think in this case, that was really what it was.

• 14:13Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by State Farm. We talk a lot about intentional decision-making, and that extends to the practical stuff too. Like making sure your coverage actually works for your life. State Farm is there to meet you where you are, and they know how sweet it is to feel good about your decisions. Talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can choose to bundle and save with a personal price plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state.

• 14:48Jay Shetty?

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• 15:32Jay Shetty?

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• 16:18Jay Shetty?

  high fructose corn syrup and more, so you can shop with peace of mind. Shop Whole Foods Market in-store or online. Yeah, and how many times have you found that? Because I think it's often those perceptions or those stereotypes are based on someone having had a bad experience.

• 16:35Speaker 01

  There's always a bad...

• 16:36Jay Shetty?

  Right?

• 16:36Speaker 01

  So it's either, so either you had the experience...

• 16:39Jay Shetty?

  Or your friend did.

• 16:40Speaker 01

  Someone told you about the experience, you saw it, you heard it. So, you know, we develop beliefs. You know, either we experience it ourselves, it could be something where your parent says, "Money is the root of all evil", and like, "Oh, you're three over, oh, I guess so", and you adopt it. You know, the thing is, I always say is that your brain, we're not born with spyware. And these limiting beliefs that get inserted in us almost, right? It's like, unless you're really aware, you don't have a natural protection against those limiting beliefs. Because what happens is very often is you'll do, you'll take an action, right? And the action doesn't get you a good result, especially when you're young. Because you know, you don't have the strategies yet, you don't have the wherewithal, right? Maybe you were in a disempowered state at the time, so you get a bad result.

• 17:25Speaker 01

  So what happens is you get a bad result, and then that's the result. What does that really mean? Well, a result only has meaning based on the language that we apply to it. So you apply meaning to a result, and you could say, okay, I tried something and I failed. What's the meaning of that? I'm terrible at that, I should never do that. That felt bad, because when you have a negative result, it feels bad. So what ends up happening is if you typically will fall into a disempowered emotional state, like negativity, fear, right? Self-loathing, right? And then you'll say, like for me, with artists, your drawing. When I was in kindergarten, I tried to draw a bowl of fruit, and then all the kids were at it. And the teacher, Mrs. Roskin, I still remember her name, right? She's the girl, I look at, uh-oh, the girl drew this beautiful bowl, and mine was, looked like it was someone sneezed on the paper.

• 18:10Speaker 01

  So Mrs. Roskin, she goes, oh, Lisa, what a beautiful picture. Lisa is such a budding Van Gogh. Then she looks at me, she goes, Mr. Jordan, you're just knocking every, you're just gonna be good in math and science. And I'm like, ugh. And that's, and just like that, right? I feel bad, so what does it do? Next time I go to draw, I get nervous. Or you don't typically do things you're not naturally good at. So your potential gets cut off. Like, we're all born on day one, I believe, most of us. But, you know, unless, obviously, everyone's got certain natural born talents. But generally speaking, we're born with this amazing pure potential. And then we start taking actions, and based on the results we get. If we get a good result, we say, oh, wow, that feels good. Let me practice that, let me do it more, let me learn a strategy.

• 18:54Speaker 01

  And it's a self-reinforcing loop that turns you into something, you're proficient at something, and you get great at it. And if you get a bad result, right, it's the opposite. So I think that's a lot of it, you know?

• 19:05Jay Shetty?

  Absolutely, and having been someone who's You know, when I, when I look at your life and your journey, you've been in parts of your life where there are things that you have deep substance in and you're sharing them. And we also see plenty of people online today who aren't necessarily selling things that they're genuinely experts in or learning. And so you see that again, too. And I mean, you even see the worst, like, I just want to address this for my podcast audience. The amount of people that have fake Jay Shetty profiles right now and are trying to scam my audience. And I'm sure you've experienced that for years.

• 19:34Speaker 01

  I got this thing. I actually emailed Mark Cuban about it because I got some, someone goes, hey, check, I know this is not you. You need to address this. It was someone, I couldn't believe they wrote an article on Facebook. And it was saying that Jordan Belfort just got out a shark tag with Mark Cuban. They went partners on a new currency trading system. And everyone's, and it was a whole thing with send your money here to invest. And I'm like, what? So I email Mark, Mark, you didn't, dude, this crazy shit going on. All right. So, so basically, you know, it's very annoying, you know, and I, wow, I can't count the number. I guess it's gonna be some very, it's verified and not, but still it's.

• 20:09Jay Shetty?

  Still unfortunate. And this is my thing. Like, I feel total compassion to people who have to even want to do people like that.

• 20:15Speaker 01

  I'll tell you, it's even more, I think, problematic. It's not so much the Jay Shetty fake profiles. I think people will quickly know who's Jay Shetty and who's not, right? And I think that's less true. People, when you cross over a certain point, people know who you are, right? The problem is, is the people who are not Jay Shetty, but who are teaching things, pretending to have the same knowledge and wisdom as a Jay Shetty, but haven't done the work, haven't lived the life and aren't authentic about it. And they're regurgitating, they read in the book and they really don't have a basis for what they do. So they give a watered down, typically self-serving version that's designed to sell people products. And that's destructive. And I hate that. Like, you know, these free webinars, attend the free webinar. And it's like designed just to separate people from their money. I mean, that's the really destructive part.

• 20:59Speaker 01

  Is they, they'll latch on to you and, and they'll target, like, first, okay, you go to Facebook, custom audience, everyone who likes Jay Shetty.

• 21:08Jay Shetty?

  I know that.

• 21:09Speaker 01

  And so you know, oh, that people who are interested in self-help, right? And then they'll talk about the sort of a watered down bogus self-serving message that results. And ultimately, I'm sending them $10,000 to go through the G, through the, the Anshetty master course. And that's the even worse, I think.

• 21:23Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, right.

• 21:23Speaker 01

  That frustration makes me, because I'm in sales training and there's so many terrible, oh, my God. And they're just like, and they, they're, they're expert in marketing, not a sales training. And they use that, you know?

• 21:32Jay Shetty?

  Exactly. What have you learned? Like, you've gone from that, that journey of you saying, I want to be rich. Like, you know, I want to be rich when I grow up. That's, that's the deadline to having gone from having everything.

• 21:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:43Jay Shetty?

  Having nothing, building it all back up again. Like, tell me, where in that journey was there any fulfillment? Or a period of like, yeah, this, you know, I've, I've done something now. And where was the journey of growth?

• 21:55Speaker 01

  What I will tell you is so interesting. So I, you know, we very, before we started, you, we quickly told your story, right?

• 22:00Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 22:00Speaker 01

  And I was laughing because, you know, I said, I said, what motivated you to go? You said, well, I saw my friends that were rich investment bankers and most of them miserable. That was me. I was seriously, when I was flying high, and this is what I, this is what I try to say about, you know, the glamorizing, the drug use. You know, happy people don't do 20 quails a day and snort enough cocaine to a ski jump off. It's like, it's not a happy person, right? Um, if I can go back and tell them, I would, I would definitely eliminate that from my life. I would, because I can't look back at one experience that was enhanced by, I wouldn't. So I, let me rephrase that. I wouldn't change anything I did like that because it's my life and it brought me to where I am now. I don't look stupid if I live, but if I could whisper in my young self, say, slow down. It's not a great way to live, right? I'm thankful I'm still alive.

• 22:43Speaker 01

  Um, but I, I think for me, um, I didn't do what you did. You, you made, you took, you know, it's like that old movie where like, you know, Mr. Destiny, where you, you went left, I went right. I did pursue Wall Street and I think it's very easy to lose your soul there. And I don't think, I don't think it's something that's wrong with Wall Street per se as much as the idea that on Wall Street, you're not building typically or creating things, you're trading off the ingenuity of others. And so there's, when you're done as a broker or an investment banker, what do you have to? other than money falls out of the bottom of it so the money has no meaning to it so in order to give the money meaning you try to buy things to have value tangible value

• 23:27Speaker 01

  towards an intangible number in your bank account so you have this compulsion to buy things so in the beginning if let me buy a big house that oh wow it feels good for two weeks let me buy a second house let me buy a yacht a plane right and you get this material trip and then you next thing you know you're on that treadmill where you almost can't go back from that because you're now supporting a lifestyle you've grown accustomed to right and on top of that then even worse than that is the fact that I think many people and I was like this I can always speak for myself many people I believed I went into I left my adolescence and came into adulthood very insecure with a lot of um um wounds from my adolescence and insecurities and but I always said to myself

• 24:10Speaker 01

  I know it's okay like I don't feel good inside I don't feel whole but once I get rich then I'll feel great but then I got rich and I felt exactly the same and that's when panic sets in see you see this a lot with it's my my own theory at least that a lot of these like young stars that blow up they go crazy why because when you're chasing success and you don't feel good inside you're like okay I I I shouldn't feel good inside because I'm I'm going going after something I don't have yet when I get there then I'll feel good so you can rationalize out saying I'm I'm not confident right now I'm not happy I don't feel whole but I'm not I'm struggling I shouldn't right and then you become more famous than you believed in more and then you're like

• 24:54Speaker 01

  uh oh I'm still the same guy just with more money and that's when panic sets in so what do you do let me take a pill to feel better because I can't feel like this anymore I don't like and that's the disaster of a loss and that happened to me and and what happened was that once it starts just then talk about self fulfilling cycles right you know so it fed itself and fed itself and and I had some talents and I invented a way of training salespeople and it and it was beautiful in the beginning and it got so corrupt so I can honestly say to you I was never happy I was never truly I had happy moments I had fun I had a great time. I was never genuinely happy. Um, of course, like the day my daughter was born, I was happy and could never be happy and love.

• 25:39Speaker 01

  And they're not, again, I'll use the word mutually exclusive. They're not.

• 25:42Jay Shetty?

  Sure.

• 25:42Speaker 01

  You could have these things you love and adore, but not, I never felt whole, so to speak, right? I don't think I really ever felt whole until I lost all my money, went to jail, came out and met my current wife.

• 25:54Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 25:55Speaker 01

  And I learned more from her, um, because she lived more like you. And she's just an amazing woman, um, very much like you. So was she. She was beautiful. She could have had anything. She could have. Any guy, and she's a single mom and she just, and came from a wealthy family. She took, but, and she was a very austere life and stayed true to her values. And you could agree with her values or not, but it was true to her. And, and she had all the securities too, like everybody else, but I, I, from her. And there was a sort of trust and mutual respect that it, it allowed me, and I already made a shift. And I don't think it's, it's always a series of shifts.

• 26:30Jay Shetty?

  Of course.

• 26:30Speaker 01

  Right? And, but, but that was the final nail in the coffin for me of, of becoming the person I, I try to be today and feel congruent with is that. Um, I just first, I finally felt like I truly was happy, had someone that understood me. And that would never, uh, let me down. Like we could fight, but that would, you know, a real partner in life, a soulmate, so to speak.

• 26:48Jay Shetty?

  Wow. That's beautiful, man. Thank you for sharing.

• 26:50Speaker 01

  And I'm lucky, you know, because, uh, I had a lot of women that, that, um, you know, like I, you know, I probably went for the wrong type of woman, you know, the, the old. Pickaxe in the shovel, like looking for prospecting for gold, you know?

• 27:01Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 27:01Speaker 01

  And the gold, right? And, and again, it might've been fun, but, um. And I think when you, wow, it's, you know, it's always saying the things that make sense when you're 25 don't make sense when you're 55. So.

• 27:10Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Yeah. No, thank you for sharing so openly as well. I love that. I love hearing that because I think. It's so important to hear it from someone who's genuinely been through it all, which is, which is phenomenal. Like. You know, like you said, like your experience is so powerful because you've experienced it all. When we're hearing from you, we're actually hearing from someone who's been there, done that at extremes. And that actually helps a lot more people in the middle.

• 27:34Speaker 01

  I think, I think, you know, it's funny, it even helps me when I hear other people. And like, I felt just like that.

• 27:40Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 27:40Speaker 01

  It helps me.

• 27:41Jay Shetty?

  Yes.

• 27:42Speaker 01

  So I think, and that's, I think it's a gift I can give people because I have a high profile around the world, especially with young people, is that say, wow, I mean, he looked like he was, I thought he was so confident. I thought he was so happy. I was never confident. I never was. I was always, I was, and it wasn't like I was covering up. I was just moving forward, trying to, just, I was trying to, I was most, it wasn't like I was covering up. I was just moving forward, trying to make everything okay always. And I had talents that, that allowed it to appear. You, you get it?

• 28:11Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, totally. I get it.

• 28:12Speaker 01

  And then also because, I think, because of all the money I made, it allowed me to get away with things. In other words, I could, most people would have hit bottom long before me. I had too many handlers around. And if I fell asleep in a bush, because if I was on five loots, someone pick me up and bring me home and put me into bed. If I, you know, scuba diving and decided to take my tackle because I was so high, someone say, put your tag back on. You know what I'm saying? So all those things that, and thankfully I'm alive, right? But, you know, again, while I was going through it, there was, there was a lot of self-loathing the whole way. And not anymore.

• 28:45Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I can tell. Yeah, I don't feel that way.

• 28:47Speaker 01

  It's such a great way to live, you know?

• 28:49Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. And tell me what that was. What was it about that, that whole experience of going to jail, getting broke, coming out, meeting your wife, which you spoke so beautifully about, which I want to dive into, because my audience loves hearing about relationships too. But what was it about that newfound confidence? Where was that now coming from? That newfound growth that you're talking about?

• 29:07Speaker 01

  So I, I think part of it was that, in my own mind, I, I have a very, I have a very logical. So we always have this logic and emotion. We all have those two minds going on, right? I'm, I'm very, I'm a dominant logical thinker and my emotion comes from accident because by default, because you have to have it. It happens automatically, right? But for me, in my mind, I was so dead set. When I got out of jail, that I am never going to make a mistake like this again. I'm never going to use the skills I have for, for evil purposes. And I'm going to do it right. I'm not going to cut any corners. I'm going to play the long game. I'm never going to embarrass my children again, who I love more than anything. And I had such conviction of belief. When I left jail, there was no way that I was ever gonna get in trouble, no way.

• 29:51Speaker 01

  It was, there was no amount of money that I would cut a corner for, nothing I would do. I would never, I had this like, this belief now that was so, okay, that I'll never make a dollar by stepping on someone else. Unless I'm giving more value than I'm getting back, I'm just not going. And, and, and I've stayed true to that from the day I left jail. Cause, cause I had the government look on my asshole with a microscope, I'll tell you that much. Cause they, they say, how is this guy making so much money? And as you know, I'm still here like, no, you know, cause I, I never like, I've never let, cheated on my taxes, everything. So, so, which was the opposite. I was the guy that, I wasn't like trying to, to lose people money, but it was like, it wasn't my main value. My value was let me make money. My values, my values shift, shifted to let me give people value because I know I'm a great businessman and I can monetize that value.

• 30:36Speaker 01

  And that's what the purpose of the business is. So, having that core belief was the foundation for everything that came after it. And then that attracted into my life, amazing people. Because when that's the belief you have, you attract people like that because you move yourself into situations. My wife would never tolerate the old me. She fell in love with the new me, the guy that she saw the pain I felt about the mistakes I made, the, the, the remorse I had. And, and she saw how hard I worked, you know, that, you know, that, you know, I wasn't having a car and a ghostwriter. I taught myself to write, which I think probably was the linchpin of, of, you know, cause she was a skeptical, rightfully so at the beginning. But, you know, that she knew that I was doing the work, right? And, and I think that was the real part of it.

• 31:19Speaker 01

  And from there, all amazing things grew.

• 31:23Jay Shetty?

  Absolutely, yeah. And one of my favorite ways of saying it is, you know, Peter Diamandis talks about, we should redefine the word billionaire to be someone who impacts the lives of a billion people.

• 31:31Speaker 01

  There you go.

• 31:31Jay Shetty?

  And it's natural when you.

• 31:32Speaker 01

  I love him, by the way. I love you, he's great.

• 31:34Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, he's awesome. And it's like, when you impact the lives of a billion people, you naturally attract that. So that's awesome, man, I love that. And I want to dive into about relationships because you have, you have three children?

• 31:44Speaker 01

  I have three.

• 31:44Jay Shetty?

  Three, yeah, three children, which is amazing. It's beautiful to hear about your amazing relationship with your wife. What have been the key things that you've taught each other? What do you believe your wife's taught you and added to your life? And what have you given back in value?

• 31:56Speaker 01

  One thing, I, I would say the thing about my wife is her authentic self. She's just like, she is her authentic self. And it could drive me crazy sometimes. I don't agree with everything. It's her authentic self. But I, the respect you have to have for someone who's their authentic self, that's one thing, okay?

• 32:13Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I love that. My wife's after me. My wife's like that too.

• 32:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, and you know, we've had also, we had the, we had the reverse of most people. We spent the first three years killing each other. And then went into a state of long-term bliss. So most people liked this honeymoon, the first, we were the opposite. We had this mass, I had massive mistrust because women had left me after I, you know, my, my wife had walked out and I lost my money. And, and, and she has her own side of the story, right? But whatever it is, my story is my story, right? My, my, my, my belief about it. And, um, and her, in her life, her parents are not really, let's say, they, they're not, uh, say not done right, but it's her story to tell. But in her mind, she's like not growing up in a household that was not, didn't exude warmth, didn't accept her for who she was. She's a very spiritual person, you know?

• 32:58Speaker 01

  She's very much into the, uh, like she would do what you did. Like she was a big person that would spend three years in robes. That's her. If I gave her the chance, she'll, I'll go right now and spend three years. That's her, right? And her parents, her father was, uh, like the, you know, general counsel for, for Bank America or somebody. She grew up in that sort of family. It was very formal where she was, you know, um, her and her sister were these two little blondes. I had to sit upright and eat with their pinkies out like that, you know? I was like a savage commander. I'm like, she's like, and she's, and by the way, she still can't shake that stuff. Cause it's so ingrained in her, with the way she was raised, with her manners and stuff like that, right? But the, the interesting thing with her is just, I, it was a respect I had for her. That as a, a beautiful woman, was really smart.

• 33:42Speaker 01

  Her highest value, I'm gonna raise an amazing son. I'm gonna raise a, a, a man. And, and nothing's at the end. It's not about money. It's about another man. I'm just gonna do it myself with my own resilience. And her son now is my son, okay, Bowen, and he works, he's my partner, my co, he's amazing. I have, I have my own son. He's like, works with me full time and like he runs all the, you know, cause I'm too old for social media. Like he, he does something like, what are you doing, dad? He goes, then they'll trust me. People are like, no, come on, no one wants it. And everyone wants, I don't get it, right? You know what I'm saying? So it's an amazing gift and my own two kids, my natural, right? They're all like just best, they just all love each other and it's so. That was the big lesson, I think, you know, with that relationship was being authentic.

• 34:23Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 34:24Speaker 01

  It's like I always felt like I wrote my first book and I think, I think why people connected with it. I always kept saying, I, I just like narrative that was like, I felt like an actor on the stage in my own life.

• 34:33Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 34:34Speaker 01

  Like I'm doing what people think Jordan Belfort, the Wolf of Wall Street should be doing, not what I want to be doing. And it's a terrible way, not even a terrible way to live, but it's just not, it's not, it's not a sustainable way to live.

• 34:47Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, absolutely. It's like method acting.

• 34:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, exactly.

• 34:50Jay Shetty?

  It's literally a method.

• 34:50Speaker 01

  You got it.

• 34:51Jay Shetty?

  You're playing another role and now after playing that role, you've convinced yourself you are that role. So you actually forget that you were playing a role in the first.

• 34:59Speaker 01

  I was like, oh, Daniel Day Lewis on steroids.

• 35:01Jay Shetty?

  Exactly. Yeah, Daniel Day Lewis. Yeah, yeah.

• 35:03Speaker 01

  He's the best.

• 35:04Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, he's really good.

• 35:05Speaker 01

  Well, you seem like it was a movie that you come gangs.

• 35:07Jay Shetty?

  Gangs of New York, yeah. Yeah, it's incredible.

• 35:09Speaker 01

  He might scare himself.

• 35:11Jay Shetty?

  Efforts he goes through to believe that that's him.

• 35:13Speaker 01

  I know.

• 35:13Jay Shetty?

  It sticks. And I love hearing that about your wife because anyone who follows my wife's on social media too. And she was, she was my first guest on the podcast when we started.

• 35:20Speaker 01

  And you know, it's like my wife, but the only, the one thing that drives me crazy about my wife is that she's so smart. She gets so much to offer, but she's very, she's not like me. She's, she's behind the scenes. She's my partner in business. She runs a lot of the company, but she's like the power behind the scenes and I'm, I'm trying to push her to go out. My son's trying to push her and she like talk about, but it's not her thing.

• 35:38Jay Shetty?

  She's playing her role.

• 35:39Speaker 01

  I know.

• 35:40Jay Shetty?

  She's playing her.

• 35:40Speaker 01

  Get her out here one of these days.

• 35:42Jay Shetty?

  Absolutely.

• 35:42Speaker 01

  Get her on this. You'd love, I mean, you'd love it. She's amazing.

• 35:44Jay Shetty?

  That's awesome.

• 35:45Speaker 01

  Maybe she could explain to you how she like came to accept me.

• 35:47Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I'd love to hear that. My, my wife had to do something similar too. So I get that. I, I would love to dive into that.

• 35:54Speaker 02

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• 36:24Jay Shetty?

  Tell me how you've.

• 36:27Jay Shetty?

  What I love about you is that we're sitting here, you come across super genuine, super happy, you know, you're a real human being and my big thing with that is that you've had the courage to redefine who you are.

• 36:40Speaker 01

  Right.

• 36:40Jay Shetty?

  And I think all of us go through failures in life, but the extreme of the rock bottom and lows that you've had in your life and to kind of emerge from that must have taken a lot. And tell us about that, like how you've risen through failure is very rare.

• 36:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, so on some level, there's just two sides to this. On one side of the equation, in terms of my ethics and my value, ethics and integrity, not integrity, ethics, ethics, I was raised to be ethical. I didn't have to discover newfound ethics after jail. I was raised well, my parents were the most honest, legit people in the world. I was not sent out into the world to do things like, you know, that weren't ethical, right? So that part was easy for me. I was raised to have ethics, but integrity, no, meaning that not to be true to myself and to have that confidence to put my best self out there, just I'm okay with how I act, right? So the ethics side was definitely there.

• 37:40Speaker 01

  I think the biggest shift for me, what really allowed me to do it and made it almost effortless is that, you know, people don't, I think it's about values and, you know, what we value and the underlying things like beliefs, all these things, and it's, they're all part and possible with each other, right? So people typically don't change the order of their values very easily. Like we value, like back in the day, my number one value was money, significance, recognition, success, right? You know, like those are my, and then, you know, family, you know, and, and, you know, giving back, well, way beneath that, right?

• 38:20Speaker 01

  And as human beings, we will always, not even really, we try to hit our values, those are our targets, what we're aiming for. We base our vision on those, our vision for the futures, they're based on the underlying values we have. And people don't change values unless something disastrous happens.

• 38:40Speaker 01

  Or you can spend years in therapy. So you can. There's ways you do it. You can do it through intense therapy. And we're doing, we're really working on yourself and really, but not like really doing it. Or you could blow up like I did, where you blow out and you lose everything, say, whoa, I'm like, I lost my entire life. I've been a reexa- and then almost it happens naturally where you're like, you're shocked into reexamining. And once your values make a shift, I'm like, it's like, whoa, like I had it wrong. And then everything changes. Your unconscious mind so powerful that once the underlying root shifts, everything that is built, it all rearranges itself automatically, right?

• 39:21Speaker 01

  So I think that was the shift. It was a shift in values and it made everything, my beliefs. I think my beliefs weren't really that corrupt as much. I had the wrong values. I think that was really the problem.

• 39:31Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, no, that makes so much sense. And I always feel that, that if we don't willingly uproot our negative values or the values that are driving us crazy, we'll be forced to uproot them in a different way.

• 39:41Speaker 01

  What happened, exactly. You know, you can either do it yourself proactively. I, I got lucky because I had it done for me. I, you know, I had one FBI agent who's a friend of mine now. I love the guy. We're friends. We speak all.

• 39:51Jay Shetty?

  No way. Wow, that's awesome. I didn't know that.

• 39:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. And I'm friends with the prosecutor, the FBI agent, really with the FBI agent. I love the prosecutor too. He's a wonderful guy. Um, and you know, thank God, because if I would have just gone, I probably would have died. But also I would have never had the, living this life that I have today. And you know, and I, I want to make it clear, you know, say, oh, look, I guess maybe crime pays. Guys, let me just tell you it flat out, okay? If you want to do what I did so you can write a book, it's a real long shot. Like, I, like, I never thought I'd finish my book. Better yet, you know, and the only, you know, I tricked myself into finishing my, you know, I finished my book is by, when I got out of jail, I wrote like 10 pages in my, in my, I had a guy who was, I sent to an agent. He's like, oh my God, they're great.

• 40:34Speaker 01

  I was like, really? So I, you know, I did, I went to my daughter who was very close with them. I'm like, guess what? Daddy's gonna write a bestseller. She's like, really? So I, I used the power of my love for my daughter and my son. Because once I told them about it, alright, I couldn't let them down. So I tapped into my own love, and it was that a love, you know, so much of it was about making my children proud again, to show them that I could do it right. Now, and there's such power in that, like when you, that's really, you know, I talk about like, you're really knowing your why. Like, when I was in jail, like, I was able to learn to write because I closed my eyes and I'd imagine the faces of my children.

• 41:13Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 41:13Speaker 01

  And in that, there's like this power of that. You'll always do more for someone that you love unconditionally, a cause you truly believe in. And once you could tap into that, the power that you can muster as a result is almost unlimited. It's limitless, basically. So, that was the secret.

• 41:30Jay Shetty?

  Absolutely. I love that. And that was actually one of the things that boosted our service as monks. When we became monks, we believed the whole world was our family.

• 41:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 41:36Jay Shetty?

  So when you have that visualization and meditation, that is just so energizing to you because now you can live for others truly. And one thing you brought about there, which I'm really glad you mentioned, was around how you can't manufacture your journey to make it marketing. Like, that doesn't work like that. And I think that's a really important point to start there.

• 41:53Speaker 01

  And, you know, it's so, because I hate what the press does, and they'll try to like, twist something to fit a narrative, like, and then people will read that and say, hmm, maybe that, you know, maybe, you know, crime doesn't pay. But people will say, maybe, it's so stupid because like, you know, it's the longest of law. Yeah, let me do it. And then lean onto the cap, you'll play me, it'll be, wow, I mean, good lord. You know, it's the whole thing, it's like a one in a billion shot, right?

• 42:16Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 42:16Speaker 01

  And the truth is, there's so many better ways to make money than writing a book. You probably know, you've written some books, right?

• 42:23Jay Shetty?

  No, I'm actually writing my first one right now.

• 42:24Speaker 01

  You've never written, oh, you gotta write a book.

• 42:26Jay Shetty?

  It's, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's still, I'm writing it right now.

• 42:28Speaker 01

  I wrote them myself, which is really a pain in the butt, but...

• 42:30Jay Shetty?

  I'm working, I'm spending about four hours a day on it right now, every day, right?

• 42:35Speaker 01

  I am the slowest writer in the world. I am really terrible at it. But, you know, I think the product ends up being readable, but the process is ugly. I'll look at a word like, better, better still, even better. Better now, but no, and I'll sit there for like fifteen minutes.

• 42:50Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 42:50Speaker 01

  On one, two, my wife's like, she's like, your broken record hit me. She goes, medicine. I'm like, okay. And I give, it's like really.

• 42:55Jay Shetty?

  I love it. But it's a good process, right? Because the process is so like right now, I'm, when I'm writing my book, I'm going through all my belief systems and I have to recheck them and reprove them to myself. And it's just giving me so much more profound realization.

• 43:08Speaker 01

  So it's a good point. So I think also when I left, it's a good point because I, I think also what changed me, and then maybe it's what a lot sealed in many things to me, was writing my book was like the, the most incredible form of self-therapy. I was like, whoa, because looking, I guess, you know, you start peeling back the layers and I'm trying to understand myself. And I'm like, oh my God. And I started to really got this crystal clear understanding of what things drove me and sort of the progression of things. And, and like, um, I, I definitely emerged from that experience feeling that I had a much, I don't know if I had changed or not, but I had much greater understanding into the demons that drove me. I really did.

• 43:48Jay Shetty?

  That's amazing. Did you have people, this is what blows my mind the most is, did you have people, mentors, coaches, who could see and were able to share this with you, like you're doing for so many people now, like right now, what you're sharing here, I guarantee you, there are people listening and watching right now, who can change their ways because they've listened to this podcast. Did you have people?

• 44:09Speaker 01

  Problem was, yeah, the problem is it's a very different time.

• 44:12Jay Shetty?

  Right.

• 44:12Speaker 01

  Um, there, there was no access to information like this, which is, which is why podcasts and just the internet itself can be such an amazing tool. Um, because now you almost have to, you know, shame on you.

• 44:23Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 44:23Speaker 01

  If you don't seek out the right information because it's all out there for the taking. But that thing you had to go to the public library or go to seminars and so much bogusness out there, right? So for, for me, um, I had some mentors. The problem was, and it was, is I.

• 44:40Speaker 01

  Had a talent for training salespeople. And it's such a monetizable skill set that everybody wanted, like it was pulling from me. And I was like, so people will just, it was almost like, like, people would come to me, they just would try to grab a piece of the pie. And I was all too happy to, because it made me feel good to have successful people, like, because of my holes I had, you understand? You get it? Like, oh, wow, look at this guy, he's a freaking criminal, I shouldn't let this guy near me, but he's a famous guy. And like, it's, so, so you get it? So I, I, what happens, you track, I had this, it's, so you, you track people into your life based on what you're doing? You track the wrong mentors when you're on that journey I was on.

• 45:20Speaker 01

  So it's, it's like almost a self fulfilling prophecy that when the seed is a little bit corrupt, you can't be half pregnant when it comes to ethics, it just, every, I'm, I believe that over time, things tend to mostly become an exaggeration of themselves.

• 45:37Jay Shetty?

  Yes.

• 45:37Speaker 01

  They, they become more, everyone's message becomes more, if you're looking at someone's message today, look at Donald Trump, um, thirty five years ago. You see a sober guy with similar beliefs, but saying them in a very different way, where you're like, okay, wow, that's just pretty mellow. And everyone's like, wow, bravo. And now you see someone that many people find to be offensive, but you could love my hand, but boys, over time, it just becomes more and more of what he is. Okay? So even if the core message is actually pure, I believe anything comes at extreme, starts to take on negative overtones.

• 46:10Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. I love what you just brought up there because fame and money will always open up doors, sometimes quicker than values.

• 46:18Speaker 01

  Hmm, yeah.

• 46:19Jay Shetty?

  How do we make sure we don't buy into our own hype? Because when fame and money opens doors and you have them, how do you make sure you don't buy into that? Because that's in effect a massive hurdling and stumbling block.

• 46:31Speaker 01

  So it's easy to tell you someone how and really harm them to follow it.

• 46:35Jay Shetty?

  Totally.

• 46:36Speaker 01

  So the easy way is your friends, who were your friends before you were successful, are gonna be the friends who are there after the trip is over. The people that come on along the way, you'd be lucky if one of them is really actually your friend. The problem is those people are really good. They're professional ingratiators and angerous honors and it's really, really difficult for people. So it's like, I can't, I'd be lying if I said there was just some surefire way as much as, listen, the easy answer is, you know, use your eyes, your ears and your common sense and just remember that, you know, that you are still the same person as before. So all these people who are in love with the material side or the fame side of your

• 47:21Speaker 01

  journey, they're not real friends, they're just not. Sometimes you find a great one along the way who's just surely has great motives, but most of the time they're not like that. So it's typically about focusing on people that you knew beforehand, not attracting the, there's all those on the way up people that are like just using really, really toxic. And like a friend of mine, he passed away, right? But a guy in Hollywood, Doug Ellin, right? A very successful producer with movies and TV series, right? Anyway, so his oldest friend, they were friends since they were five and he was still his best friend. He did Entourage, Doug, right?

• 47:56Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 47:57Speaker 01

  So like, and you saw that and Doug was a whole guy, you know, and his best friend was still the guy from his five. So I think it's really, really an important thing. My best friends are still friends when I was a kid, young.

• 48:07Jay Shetty?

  That's amazing, man. How did you turn that relationship with the FBI into a friendship? How did that happen?

• 48:13Speaker 01

  Um, so what happened was, is, um,

• 48:16Jay Shetty?

  That sounds like an awesome.

• 48:17Speaker 01

  I tremendous respect for him. So, so, you know, I deserved to get caught, you know, for what I was doing and he played it straight. He didn't entrap me. I had no, I wasn't like, I was like the only guilty man in Shawshank, you know what I mean? I was guilty. I was like, all right, you know, I go to jail, I made a mistake, let me do my time and come out a better human being for that. My life's not over, I want to rebuild, right? And he recognized, I think what he really recognized is that he understood me and he knew that I wasn't a bad person, that good people do bad things. And especially the prosecutor, Dan Alonso, who's now a very well-respected lawyer, he rose up, he rose up really high in justice, but at my sentencing, Dan Alonso, he was, they come and go U.S. attorneys, right? But he actually was already gone from my case, but he actually came back for my sentencing

• 49:02Speaker 01

  in front of the judge and he stood up and said, "Your Honor, I've never said this before. This is the only guy I've ever worked with that actually gets it."

• 49:10Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 49:11Speaker 01

  And you can read this in my standing transcript, he goes, this guy gets it. He's not going to get in trouble, goes, maybe I'm crazy and Pollyanna, but I am telling you, this guy totally understands what happened, what went wrong, and he's going to be a productive member of society. And I think Agent Coleman is, is really, he felt the same way. And when I first got out, you know, we just, I had respect, but then he watched me grow, and he was like, I guess he was probably very skeptical in the early days, and he's like, he goes, dude, I'm not, he goes, you're just all what you are. I'm really proud of you because you're just, not in like, in, in, in a con this anyway, but man, you know, good for you. And also, I wrote about him very fondly in the book because he was an honest, hardworking guy, was doing his job. It was not like, he wasn't like, you know, you're planting evidence, like, well, how could I hate the guy, you know? He was right, I was wrong, he did his work, and, and I'm glad I made him famous because

• 49:56Speaker 01

  now he's on the speaking tour, he makes a lot of money. So, good for him, he's a great speaker, and he's gonna have a great journey as well.

• 50:02Jay Shetty?

  Oh, that's awesome. I love that. Tell me about the, why you think the straight line system has been so successful, especially now because based on your value proposition of giving more value?

• 50:11Speaker 01

  Well, I think for sure that the, my, it's funny, I had a limiting belief about it, and I was like, oh, sales, I actually almost thought selling was evil, or the straight line was, it's so powerful, when you really can, you know, use a system of persuasion at a high level, like the straight line's a very powerful system. And I was like, oh, maybe people misuse it, and I saw that, now it seems so ridiculous because it's like, it's like anything, any powerful thing, it can be used for good or evil, right? I think the reason why it's so effective is that it's, it focuses, it, it, there's really no other end, I've never seen another one where it's like an end-to-end system that like, it just takes you from the moment you open up your mouth, to the last second, even

• 50:52Speaker 01

  then, then after, and also shows you that, that it focuses on three forms of communication. The words that you say, the tonality that you use, and the body language that applies to it in person, right? And it puts that into a construct that allows any person to

• 51:10Speaker 01

  Manage a situation of influence the way a natural born closer see there's people who are natural born salespeople I I think you are one by the way or close to it may but very good solid communicator right but most people aren't they struggle with that and what happens I was amazingly natural born salesperson and I was able to break down my strategy of what I was doing and because I had to because I had kids who were not that smart really very unsophisticated kids and I tasked them with calling the richest people in America and they couldn't do it so it's you know I had this other system before that and you never know how good a system is till you stress it to the point of fracture so my old system just collapsed it wouldn't work and I had a panic I was like what am I doing and then and I just no I had this idea about like I said wait

• 51:52Speaker 01

  a second you know to me every sale is the same was so easy to sell like because I'm my own one I was lining things up almost arithmetically and logically and and as soon as I came up with this idea guys it's a straight line watch and they're just like you read the book thinking grow rich they talk about this like collective unconscious like I tapped into like the all that there is basically and I almost felt like when I invented it was like over a period of like thirty days I felt like I was channeling I really I never felt like that they had so much info and thought of these things weren't and when I was done with it is like the impact it had in these kids lives it created the whole unfortunately went the wrong way because I was out of my mind and that's my values so what happened was this perfect example of bankrupt values incredible strategy that goes

• 52:35Speaker 01

  in a bad direction yeah but beautiful values amazing strategy you could do I'm doing more good now that I have a mag I get emails every day all the people like you changed my life it's like the greatest thing ever yeah right absolutely I couldn't agree with you so I think that's what it really is is that it's it takes what's the truth about communication yes and it puts it in a way that anyone can use it yeah I love that because everything's given meaning by how we use it totally right technology is not good or bad social media is not good or bad inherently it can be used for something higher or lower as are the experiences like it's always about the meaning you apply right in other words so you take something that's that's that's you know benign and malevolent based on how you use it and experience could debilitate you will be your biggest learning experience in the world based on the meaning you apply to it's always about the

• 53:20Speaker 01

  meaning and the intent right and I and I think that for me I I've put out like over the last Well, it was a twelve, thirteen years. So much positive intention out into the world. Like, I never, I've not made one action. Not that you always succeed at it. I've tried, maybe I've had, gave it a bad speeches sometimes or didn't. But I'd never not tried. Every action I took was pure from, from the start. I was like, I'm gonna make, if I do this, I can make extra money off somewhere. I never did that once, you know? And I think that's a great way to live and you make more money and you make even more money by doing that.

• 53:54Jay Shetty?

  Hundred percent.

• 53:54Speaker 01

  That's the sick part. You make even more.

• 53:56Jay Shetty?

  I've always believed intentions, everything. When people say to me, like, what do you think's worked for you? What hasn't? I'm like, I started with a simple intention that I really, really wanted to help people. And I never believed that it would be big or small or any of that. I didn't, I didn't even have a strategy when I started. All I knew is that I had this deep desire and intention and I started with that. And then I got more strategic and organized and focused.

• 54:16Speaker 01

  So I, I think that, you know, the, the important thing that I, with a lot of people say, you're a very spiritual guy. I'm not really, I'm not really. I'm, I think I'm probably more than I give myself credit for, right?

• 54:26Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 54:26Speaker 01

  But I, I just, I'm so anchored in science and rational thinking.

• 54:30Jay Shetty?

  Oh, me too.

• 54:30Speaker 01

  You know, so, but I think what happens with a lot of people is they, is they will, will look at a Jay Shetty or The Secret and they, and they miss part of the equation. See, everything about the power of intention and manifestation and attraction, it's all true. It's one, I know it's true. I've seen it in my own life, right? But it requires the integration of strategy.

• 54:52Jay Shetty?

  Hundred percent.

• 54:53Speaker 01

  And also action. See, you know, like, remember, you probably had this in England, right? Where you, you learn about magnetism and the teacher in your third grade class shows, oh, this is a magnet. It's a horseshoe magnet and this is iron filings and watch, nothing happens. And then she moves the filings closer, nothing happens, nothing happens. But if they get close enough, you see the law. So like the way the law of attraction and manifestation is, is you set an intention and that alerts you to what's the, and then you move towards what you want. And then you can attract.

• 55:23Jay Shetty?

  Hundred percent.

• 55:24Speaker 01

  So there's gotta be action on the intention.

• 55:26Jay Shetty?

  Hundred percent.

• 55:27Speaker 01

  And so on, like, as you said, then, once you start that, then you had strategy and, and you move towards what? That's, I think it's the secret to success.

• 55:33Jay Shetty?

  Absolutely. I love that, man. Jordan, this has been awesome. We end every interview, the final five, which is our final five rapid fire, quick fire rounds. These are quick answers, easy for you. So the first question I wanted to ask you is, what is the worst financial decision you ever made?

• 55:47Speaker 01

  The worst financial decision? Marrying my second wife.

• 55:50Jay Shetty?

  Oh, really?

• 55:52Jay Shetty?

  That would be the best. Second question, what is the best financial decision you ever made?

• 55:57Speaker 01

  Marry my third wife.

• 55:59Jay Shetty?

  Okay, nice. I like it. Third question, what is the worst advice you ever received? Think about it.

• 56:06Speaker 01

  Oh, don't worry. Everyone's doing it. Take this bag of half a million dollars. Everyone on Wall Street does that. That was my first ethical lapse. Someone said to me, oh, everyone does this. I'm like, really? Nah, okay, fine. Taking the first step over the line.

• 56:18Jay Shetty?

  Wow, I love that. Question number four is, what is the best advice you've ever received?

• 56:23Speaker 01

  Best advice I've ever received? Good things take time. Delay your gratification. That's such a huge one. If there's one thing I can tell everyone, guys, please, you don't have to make everything tomorrow. Delay your gratification. It's better and you make more.

• 56:37Jay Shetty?

  I love that. And out of all the experiences that you've had in the world, what is one experience you think you haven't had yet? Because you've had so many different experiences. What is a new thing?

• 56:46Speaker 01

  I haven't seen my children have children yet. I can't wait to have grandchildren. I'm looking, and I'm getting close now because my daughter, I think, hopefully, maybe we'll get married soon. And then I can't wait to have grandchildren because I'm going to spoil them rotten. I can't wait to have grandchildren, you know?

• 57:00Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, that's beautiful, man. Jordan, thank you so much for coming on the podcast.

• 57:03Speaker 01

  My pleasure.

• 57:04Jay Shetty?

  Pleasure having you here. Guys, go and check out Jordan Buffett's new podcast, The Wolf's Den. It literally launched a couple of days ago, so make sure you go and subscribe and check out the podcast. It's going to be awesome. Jordan, tell us some of the guests that you've gone to line up or topics and themes.

• 57:17Speaker 01

  No, it's really, it's a combination of just business, interesting people. I had, I had like some really famous people and also just average, everyday people. And I think one of the great things is because I'm pretty well known, I don't have to always have famous people. I think average people have so much to share. So it's going to be just, and funny and fun and lighthearted and a little bit of reverence, but not too reverent, but a little bit of reverence. I'm reverent, it has to be, you know?

• 57:44Jay Shetty?

  That's awesome, man. I love that. Everyone, thank you so much for watching and listening to today's podcast. Make sure you subscribe. If you haven't subscribed, make sure you rate and review as well. I'm so grateful to have you as a part of this community. And one thing I always say to you is, after the podcast, share your insights on Instagram, on Twitter, on Facebook. Anything that you learned, anything I said, anything Jordan said that stood out to you, share it. I'm always looking out for the best comments. I'm always looking out for the best posts and I repost a lot of them too. Thank you so much for listening. We'll see you again next week. Thank you, man. Thanks so much, bro.

• 58:27Speaker 02

  Now, more than ever, we need someone on our side. But Rob Whitman? Whitman's votes drove up costs, cut Medicaid and risked 350,000 Virginians' healthcare to pay for tax breaks for himself and his donors. He's not on our side. Shannon Taylor will fight corruption, cut taxes and bring down costs. This November, vote for Shannon Taylor. She's for us. Paid for by HMP, the House Majority PAC dot com. Not authorized by any candidate or candidate's committee.