Bob Parsons ON: How to Be Present & Not Fear the Future

Today, I sit down with Bob Parsons to talk about overcoming adversities. Bob shares how his war veteran trauma affected his personal life and what he did to overcome it, his journey into starting his business and finding success, and finally having found his purpose in life to always make a difference whenever he can. Bob Parsons is best known for being the founder of GoDaddy. Bob sold a majority stake in 2011 in a deal that valued the company at $2.3 billion. Currently, Bob is the CEO and founder of YAM Worldwide, which is home to his entrepreneurial ventures in the fields of motorcycles, golf, real estate, finance, marketing, innovation, and philanthropy. YAM Worldwide includes companies such as PXG and Scottsdale National Golf Club. Bob is also a US Marine Corps Vietnam veteran, and is widely recognized for his entrepreneurial and philanthropic efforts. You can order my new book 8 RULES OF LOVE at 8rulesoflove.com or at a retail store near you. You can also get the chance to see me live on my first ever world tour. This is a 90 minute interactive show where I will take you on a journey of finding, keeping and even letting go of love. Head to jayshettytour.com and find out if I'll be in a city near you. Thank you so much for all your support - I hope to see you soon. What We Discuss: 00:00 Intro 03:18 How can we learn to quantify the worst things in our life? 06:45 Dealing with PTSD alone and the symptoms that come with it 11:14 Having the remarkable ability to disassociate and using it your advantage 12:25 The trick to becoming a successful businessman and what history can teach us 15:56 Top 3 things to focus on when you want to start your own business 18:25 The GoDaddy story - how it started, success, and making a difference 25:42 What have been the biggest failures in your life? 26:38 Tapping into psychedelics to help deal with self reform 32:29 Believe in yourself and always have fun 38:39 Bob on Final Five Episode Resources Bob Parsons | Website Bob Parsons | Instagram Bob Parsons | LinkedIn Bob Parsons | Twitter YAM Worldwide Want to be a Jay Shetty Certified Life Coach? Get the Digital Guide and Workbook from Jay Shetty https://jayshettypurpose.com/fb-getting-started-as-a-life-coach-podcast/ See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by Orange Theory Fitness. One of the best investments you can make is in your own strength. The choices you make today can help shape how you feel for years to come. Orange Theory Fitness provides a one-hour workout to build strength, burn fat, and build muscle with an expert coach guiding you every step of the way. Head to orangetheory.com/onpurpose to learn more and get your first class free. Orange Theory Fitness, helping people live longer, more vibrant lives. Terms and conditions apply. See webpage and studio for details. This episode is brought to you by Mazda. Confidence isn't something Mazda finds, it's something they practise. That's the thinking behind every Mazda. With proactive safety features designed to help keep you more aware,

• 0:44Jay Shetty?

  more connected, and more engaged with the road ahead. It's why Mazda has been named Consumer Reports' safest new car brand and has won more 2026 IIHS Top Safety Pick Plus Awards than any other car brand as of July 2026. Visit www.iihs.org to learn more. A lot can happen when an accident doesn't. Visit MazdaUSA.com to learn more. Consumer Reports does not endorse products or services. This episode is brought to you by Amtrak. You know that feeling when you're already tired and you haven't even gotten there yet? That's where Amtrak comes in. Leave the driving behind and settle into a comfortable seat with plenty of room to stretch out.

• 1:26Jay Shetty?

  Catch up on work with wifi, grab a snack at the cafe car, or just sit back and enjoy your favourite podcast. Choose a seller or North East Regional and get there without the stress of getting there. Visit amtrak.com to plan your next trip.

• 1:42Speaker 01

  Worry belongs to tomorrow. Regret belongs to yesterday. Happiness is here and now. I learned during the war how to think. I learned to quantify the worst thing and quite often the worst thing, it's not so bad.

• 1:55Speaker 02

  The bestselling author and host. The number one health and wellness podcast.

• 1:59Speaker 01

  On Purpose with Jay Shetty.

• 2:02Jay Shetty?

  Hey everyone, welcome back to On Purpose, the number one health podcast in the world. Thanks to each and every one of you that come back every week to listen, learn and grow. And I am so excited to be talking to you today. I can't believe it. My new book, Eight Rules of Love, is out and I cannot wait to share it with you. I am so, so excited for you to read this book, for you to listen to this book. I read the audiobook. If you haven't got it already, make sure you go to eightrulesoflove.com. It's dedicated to anyone who's trying to find, keep or let go of love. So if you've got friends that are dating, broken up or struggling with love, make sure you grab this book.

• 2:44Jay Shetty?

  And I'd love to invite you to come and see me for my global tour, Love Rules. Go to jayshettytour.com to learn more information about tickets, VIP experiences and more. I can't wait to see you this year. Now, you know, my mission here is to introduce you to a vast array of individuals, people who've lived really unique lives, had incredible experiences, who can then share with us their guidance, their insight, their wisdom that they've gained along that path. And today's guest is Bob Parsons, best known for being the founder of GoDaddy. Bob sold a majority stake in 2011 in a deal that valued the company at $2.3 billion.

• 3:28Jay Shetty?

  Currently, Bob is the CEO and founder of Yam Worldwide, which is home to his entrepreneurial ventures in the fields of motorcycles, golf, real estate, finance, marketing, innovation and philanthropy. Yam Worldwide includes companies such as PXG and Scottsdale National Golf Club. Bob is also a US Marine Corps Vietnam veteran, which we'll dive into his story today. And Bob is also widely recognized for his entrepreneurial and philanthropic efforts. Please welcome to the show, Bob Parsons. Bob, it is great to have you here.

• 4:02Speaker 01

  Real pleasure to be here, Jay, I gotta tell you.

• 4:05Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, and I remember meeting you and it was at your beautiful facility at PXG in Scottsdale. And it was a really fine evening. It was myself, you were there having dinner. I was traveling with Will Smith at the time, Nick Jonas was there. We all kind of just bumped into each other over dinner. And I remember just how gracious you were, how kind you were, what a beautiful interaction we all had that evening. It's a really special place.

• 4:31Speaker 01

  I remember meeting you guys and, you know, and Will and Nick are two of my absolute favorite people. And I knew a little bit about you and, you know, just to meet you is just a, you're an easy guy to be around, Jay.

• 4:44Jay Shetty?

  Well, thank you. That's very kind of you. And I was just saying to your team outside that that was the first time I'd ever actually played golf. So I don't play. But that was the first time I'd ever played golf. I had one of your coaches that was working with me for a couple of days. I came back to LA and I started looking for a coach because I got really into it that weekend. Will got me a really nice set of clubs from the, from the course too. That were fitted for me and made for me. And I couldn't find a coach as good as the ones you had at PXG. So now I need to come back more often to get some lessons.

• 5:18Speaker 01

  Well, we're there.

• 5:19Jay Shetty?

  Thank you. Well, Bob, I want to dive straight in to your journey and to really dive into your work that you're doing today. And I think I was really blown away to hear about your time as a Marine and I'd like to start there.

• 5:32Speaker 01

  Well, you know, when I enlisted in the Marine Corps, I did so mostly because I had two friends of mine asking me to join them. They were, we were in our senior year of high school and they were going to visit with the Marine Corps recruiter and asked me if I'd go along with them and I did. You know, as we spent time with the Marine Corps recruiter, he eventually had us in the palm of his hands. I mean, this was during the, the height of the Vietnam War in 1968. I lasted one month and walking through a village at night. I was on the point team and the point man, he stepped over a tripwire, missed it.

• 6:14Speaker 01

  And I hit it and that thing blew and I got shrapnel both my legs and my left elbow and I was medevaced out. I left on a stretcher.

• 6:25Speaker 01

  So, you know, the thoughts that I took back from that is I think I learned to think one day at a time. And I look to quantify the worst thing that could possibly happen. That's got me through a number of businesses. I've built three businesses now and I'm working on the third all from scratch. And, you know, when you do a startup, a startup, you have a lot of good days and a lot of bad days. And sometimes, you know, the good days are euphoric and the bad days look like Armageddon. So, you know, how you think really matters. And I learned during the war how to think.

• 7:07Speaker 01

  I learned to quantify the worst thing and quite often the worst thing, when you sit down and you quantify, it's not so bad. But if you, you know, if you look at the worst thing, it's this big, dark room full of bad things that could happen, then it looks like far worse than it actually is. And then it becomes debilitating.

• 7:28Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I mean, that's such a powerful reflection, hearing that from you, based on the experiences that you went through. Often we hear that idea, but sitting with you here today, listening to in person, I can feel just how real that idea is for you. I love what you said about facing one day at a time. I think a lot of our anxiety, a lot of our pain, a lot of our stress is based on what could happen in 12 months.

• 7:56Speaker 01

  Oh, exactly, yeah.

• 7:58Jay Shetty?

  Or what happened 12 months ago.

• 8:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 8:02Jay Shetty?

  And what you're saying is, well, actually, when you take one day at a time, that feels manageable and solvable, even in such extreme situations.

• 8:10Speaker 01

  Well, you know, one day at a time is something you can do something about, right? Because it's there, you know, to be worried about a year from now, there's not much you can do until it's a year from now. And then it becomes one day at a time.

• 8:23Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 8:24Speaker 01

  I often thought that worry belongs to tomorrow.

• 8:29Speaker 01

  Regret belongs to yesterday, happiness is here and now.

• 8:33Jay Shetty?

  Hmm, that's so powerful. Wow. And then when you came back and you come back and you're experiencing depression, you're experiencing, of course, all the stress, the trauma that comes from living in that way for a month. I mean, how did your parents react to that? Before we get on to how you reacted to it, I mean, I mean, what, how did your parents feel?

• 8:52Speaker 01

  I grew up in a, in a different kind of house. Um, I grew up in a, in a, in a blue collar neighborhood in East Baltimore. And mom and dad were both compulsive gamblers. And they weren't very good at it. Now, I, I wouldn't trade my mom and dad for any two on the planet. I loved them to pieces. Uh, but they didn't pay a lot of attention to me. And I wasn't actually home that much, so they never noticed. They never noticed and a lot of it, which a lot of veterans, I just kept to myself, you know, my, my symptoms were, and as I was home, they got worse and they got worse and they got worse. And when I say that, I mean, over

• 9:33Speaker 01

  forty-nine years, the, the symptoms with me was I didn't, I didn't wanna go places. I didn't wanna be with groups, you know, no matter who the group was, I never felt like I belonged. Because I'd be there and I'd have these, it's just this picture of the stuff that we did, I mean, and it just never leaves you. And of course, nobody else is dealing with that kind of stuff. So you definitely are different. Right? So, so that's the, you know, one of the things, a quick temper is, is, is another thing. People would describe me as being one of the most intense people they've ever met. Now, the, the crying, when I got into that, it was always by myself. Nobody'd be around.

• 10:15Speaker 01

  But there was good things too. And the, the good things were, when I went to college, I, when I came back, I worked as a laborer in a steel mill in Bethlehem Steel. And I did that for a year. And then the University of Baltimore had a special deal for veterans where, uh, my high school grades didn't matter, thank goodness. I didn't have to take the entrance exams, right? And I could go on the GI Bill, which I did. I went, studied accounting. Literally, I mean, as fate would have it, it was the first major in the book. What is this? They said, you good with math? I said, yeah, as good as anything. You interested in business? Yeah, you should try accounting. And I did.

• 10:56Speaker 01

  And I wound up graduating with a Bachelor of Science in Accountancy, magna cum laude.

• 11:02Jay Shetty?

  Wow, congratulations.

• 11:04Speaker 01

  I'd have never done that without the Marine Corps, never, ever, ever. Took the CPA exam, passed it the first time, got a job where I would travel. I mean, my life is full of just these coincidences, you know, where I, I was working for Commercial Credit Leasing Corp. And this is back in 1975. They send me to Redwood City to schedule the assets to this leasing company they want to buy. I finish, I have 12 hours until the flight. I wind up on Stanford campus at the bookstore, because I always like to, like to read and so forth, and I buy a book on programming and the basic language.

• 11:47Speaker 01

  And I read enough of that during the layover and on the flight, wrote my first programs and then got good at it. Bought an, and, and the company that I worked for had a dumb terminal that happened to run the basic computer language.

• 12:03Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 12:04Speaker 01

  And then I, I taught myself Pascal and then C and then C++. And I started my first business, which was parts of technology. And I, I wrote all the code for that. And when I, when I was working there, I, I worked 40 hours, no, 60 hours, 60 hours at a time. I come to work Monday morning, work through Tuesday morning, work through Wednesday morning, and then about 8 o'clock at night, I'd start to hallucinate. After about 60 hours, I'd hear stuff that wasn't there, maybe see something move that I know didn't. And I'd go back, go to sleep, come back, you know, after eight hours in a shower

• 12:49Speaker 01

  and a little, actually a little workout, do it again. And that's how that company got off the ground. I put forty thousand dollars into that company and I sold it to Intuit for sixty four million. That was my first business.

• 13:03Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 13:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 13:04Jay Shetty?

  You know, most people like just reintegrating into society, like just kind of surviving seems to be a natural challenge because of the extreme events that people go through. How did you navigate that when you were talking about some of the challenges you had when you came back? Like, how did you even just start finding your way again? Because it can be so disassociating, it can be so disconnected.

• 13:29Speaker 01

  Well, you know, using using that term disassociate, disassociating. There was a time when I hadn't seen a psychiatrist for a good while and she said, told me, one of the things that that has helped me get through to war and also helped me in business. She says, you have a remarkable ability to disassociate. And where I developed that, I don't know. One of the blessings that I have is I don't worry about anything at all. I just don't worry. And that has been one of the things that to me is just helped bring out the joy in my life, you know, which joy there was.

• 14:13Jay Shetty?

  I mean, that's beautiful to hear. That's what an incredible gift to have to not worry. That's very special. When you started learning and teaching yourself these coding languages and you started building this company, what was your level of business experience at the time or technology experience at the time? And how did you even figure out what you wanted to build? I think there's so many people today, I just, I literally was just at the tech university in Monterrey, Mexico. Fifty percent of the people from that university go on to become entrepreneurs. And so it's a really phenomenal institution. But one of the biggest questions I saw that young people have is, Jay, how do I know if I'm doing the right thing? Or I don't know what I'm building or what should I focus on?

• 14:58Jay Shetty?

  I feel like now there's so much choice that people feel paralyzed by the amount of options they have. This episode is brought to you by Chase Sapphire Reserve. One of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves is the chance to step outside of our routine. Travel is a way of slowing us down and shifting our perspective. And with the Chase Sapphire Reserve card, every journey becomes even more rewarding. Earn four times the points on flights and hotels booked direct. Enjoy access to award-winning airport lounges. Three times the points on dining and reserve exclusive tables. Learn more at chase.com/sapphirereserve. Cards issued by JP Morgan Chase Bank. NA member FDIC.

• 15:43Jay Shetty?

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• 15:47Jay Shetty?

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• 16:30Jay Shetty?

  That's indeed.com/podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs.

• 16:39Speaker 03

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• 17:09Speaker 01

  I had a degree in accountancy. So I understood the record-keeping of business. Right. All right. I started a little business, which was more of a bookkeeping business than anything where I'd work with these small businesses. Some were taverns, one was a flower shop. One of my favorites was pest control, Phil's Pest Control. Guy's name was Fat Willie. I learned a lot from him. Uh, keep track, the way he would keep track of things and, and, and I, you know, and it got to the point where over, you know, over, you know, a few years, I could, you know, start doing the records of a business and I could tell you if they'd succeed or not.

• 17:52Speaker 01

  And anyhow, using those little things that I learned there, you know, that's what I did when I launched my business and then plus I learned. You know, I learned like, for example, I read during the Civil War, right? During the Civil War in the Union, there was, uh, General McClellan, who really trained and organized the, uh, Union Army, but he could not move them into battle, just couldn't do it. Right? And then, uh, so, so Lincoln fired him and put Grant there and Grant didn't care how they were organized. The enemy's over there, go there. Right? That's, that's, that's what he did. And actually the, the right way is a mix of the two.

• 18:31Speaker 01

  Right? So I learned that from them. I learned from John D Rockefeller, that the guy who knows the most about his business. He kept exceptional records. They were all manual, but he knew everything about his business at a time when very few people did. The guy who knows the most about his business, quite often is the guy that, that, uh, wins because, as you know, knowledge truly is power and especially specific and pertinent knowledge. So, I mean, I, I learned from, from people in history, right? And, um, and then beyond that, I just powered through.

• 19:10Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I love those examples. I think what I love about them is I often say to people that you can be mentored by people you've never met. When we study history, when we look at patterns, when we look at connections and start connecting the dots between events that have happened before us. You can actually garner so much wisdom and so much insight, even if you never asked Rockefeller the question yourself.

• 19:34Speaker 01

  Exactly. I mean, you know, and somebody got, Julius Caesar's another one. You know what he was able to do in Gaul and how he was able to, you know, lead his armies and, and one time he was attacked by a vastly larger force and the battlements that he built was just brilliant, right? Nobody showed him how to do that. He figured it out. So, I mean, we have that ability as long as you believe in yourself and you give yourself a chance.

• 20:03Jay Shetty?

  If there's someone right now is listening, who's thinking about starting a business, what would be the top three things you think they should think about? If they're starting, if they're thinking about starting something?

• 20:12Speaker 01

  Well, the first thing is they should do something that they love, that is fun, that is something that they're really interested in. And, and the reason for that, my father used to tell me, he used to say, Robert, when you love something, it tells you all its secrets.

• 20:31Jay Shetty?

  Hmm, that's beautiful.

• 20:33Speaker 01

  And basically, if, you know, if you love what you're doing, it's going to, well, you're going to work harder. And that, that all translates to success. And then, let's see here, what would be the, the second, you, you have to not be doing it for the money. If, if you start a business and you're doing it just to turn a buck, I don't think you'll be successful. You got to start it to be special. And the, the businesses that I started, and none of them, even GoDaddy, did I do it to, to make money. I did it to make a difference. You know, when you, you work to make a difference, you know, you do things that,

• 21:15Speaker 01

  on the surface, from a business standpoint, it doesn't make sense. But when it comes to really doing something special and getting your idea across and taking care of your customers and so forth, that's, that's what you need to do. And you will never do that if you're just doing it for a dollar. The third thing is there's, uh, there's two groups of people that you have to, you, you have to energize. The first group is your employees. And, uh, your employees, you know, they need to believe in what you're doing. And, uh, you need to structure it so they can believe in what you're doing, that, that it's special.

• 21:58Speaker 01

  And again, if you're doing it for money, it's, they're gonna have a difficult time doing that. But if you, you know, if you have a higher purpose, right? People always do wanna aspire to a higher purpose, I believe. So what happens is when you do that with them, it creates enthusiasm. And what do we know about enthusiasm? It's contagious.

• 22:19Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 22:20Speaker 01

  And those, the employees then fire up the customers and then the customers fire up each other. So it'd be those three things.

• 22:27Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, those are great answers. I love those three things. They're such great points. What was something that you were passionate about with GoDaddy? Like when you said that, I fully agree with you that we should never start business to make money. There has to be a greater goal with it. What was that goal with GoDaddy when it started out, like the part we don't see?

• 22:44Speaker 01

  Well, when I started GoDaddy, I had, it had been after I sold Parsons Technology, which was the name of my first business. And I signed a non-compete with, uh, Intuit. Not that I couldn't compete with them, I couldn't work for money.

• 23:00Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 23:01Speaker 01

  Right, for a few years. And, and, uh, they, they held back a few, a few million dollars. And when it was up, I just wanted to be back in action again. But I didn't know what I wanted to do. This was back when the internet was just getting going, like 97. And so I named this business Joe Max Technologies. I had like thirty-six million dollars. I had gotten divorced. I mean, I, I don't blame her, PTSD, I'm lucky. She kept me around that long. So I wanted to do something. And the internet. So what I did was, I thought, I would hire some pretty sharp people,

• 23:43Speaker 01

  and we would start trying things on the internet. And when we, and when we did, you know, if it worked, we would continue, and if it didn't, we'd move on. And so I named it Joe Max Technologies after a dirt road that I drove by on the way to work. I mean, it didn't matter. I mean, we didn't do anything. So our employees would go to Chamber of Commerce meetings, and people would ask them, "What are you doing?" I go, "Well, we don't know." You know, they said, "I've never had a business, tell me that." And then eventually, as time went on, we decided to start doing websites for people. And these are way early, really fundamental websites. And we noticed

• 24:27Speaker 01

  that the websites business would generate cash, but it couldn't scale because, you know, it was just your efforts there that you were tied to. I have a rule that if you got the right business, you can make money while you're sleeping. Your business can be successful while you're sleeping. So we then wrote software that would build a website for people. They could do it theirself. We had so many requirements. And then eventually, in 99, or 99 and 2000, we became a domain name

• 25:06Speaker 01

  registrar, renamed the company GoDaddy, just as, and I did that at first as a joke, but it stuck. And, and never did we dream that we'd make our bread on domain names. And then there's a further story going back. Okay, I would keep track of how much money I had, and then, and tie that to how successful the business is doing. Now, that, you remember, that were the days of cash burn, right? And so I was started, and when I first started, I said, "I'm not going to worry

• 25:45Speaker 01

  about this business until I get down to 30 million, and then 25, and then 20, 20, and then 18, 14, 12, 10."

• 25:57Speaker 01

  Eight, six, you know, we get down to six million dollars and this is about.

• 26:03Jay Shetty?

  So you never raised, it was all your own money you put into it?

• 26:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, exactly, exactly. It was always only my own money. I've never really borrowed much from the first business, none.

• 26:12Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 26:13Speaker 01

  And GoDaddy, none, and no partners.

• 26:16Jay Shetty?

  Oh, incredible.

• 26:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, so I get down to six million and one of the things I learned is from reading about General Grant, he kept his own counsel. I kept my own counsel, so I decided to shut GoDaddy down while I still had some, some money. And the reason I had to is the dot com boom was so loud that you couldn't buy advertising. I mean, people were paying a hundred dollars for, you know, a customer and the customer might generate two bucks. Well, you're gonna burn up a lot of cash that way.

• 26:50Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, absolutely.

• 26:50Speaker 01

  And I don't care how big your truck is, you're not gonna, you know, you're not gonna be able to make wages.

• 26:55Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 26:56Speaker 01

  That's what I did. So I go to Hawaii and I, I went there to first pay my bills, pay my employees and sell the assets, figure out how I'm gonna do that. And then, so I'm there by myself for a week and I, I started thinking about, I don't wanna shut it down. I just had this feeling, I just didn't wanna shut it down. The epiphany for me happened when this guy is parking cars and he comes up to me and he goes, hey, don't Mr. Parsons. This guy's a little older than me, throwing his keys up in the air, happy as a lark, right? I'm thinking, what's wrong with his picture? This guy has probably got nothing. He's parking

• 27:38Speaker 01

  cars for a living. Look how happy and free he is. I got six million dollars and I'm miserable, right? And so I decided then that I would go back and not shut the company down. And I just would ride it out and if the company sunk, I'd go down with the ship. So that was probably in February, March. And later that, later than the dot com crash happened. And the dot com crash, GoDaddy was born out of that. Because I was one of the few guys that was paying my bills. And all these companies just went away. I mean, I would, we would have checks returned every week from different companies. That just weren't there anymore. Right?

• 28:21Speaker 01

  And so, so we would take and, uh, you know, we'd go ahead and I went from not being able to buy advertising at any price. To having people standing in line to give it to me. I had more friends than I thought I had. And then all of a sudden, things turned around for us. And that October, we became profitable for the very first time and never missed a month since.

• 28:48Jay Shetty?

  Wow. That's unbelievable. I mean, it sounds like you've been guided so much by your intuition as well as data. Like you talked about the numbers, you talked about knowing your business. You talked about knowing your numbers, but it sounds like you're also guided intuitively. Would you agree with that? Was that, is that true? Is that fair or not really?

• 29:06Speaker 01

  You know, you, sometimes you hear this saying, better luck than good. And things just, just happen and, you know, you'd like to believe they happen for a reason. I believe the universe is just guiding you.

• 29:19Speaker 01

  And I believe there's, there's an intelligence to it, you know, however you define that intelligence. Whether it's, you know, a, a, a particular form of God or, or just the, just, just the, the way of the universe. But I believe it's there.

• 29:35Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, that's incredible. What a, what an unbelievable story. I mean, as I'm listening to you, I'm thinking, you know, you have this really positive mindset. You have this really. Incredible ability to find the good even in challenging times. What's been one of the biggest failures in your life? Or, you know, something that's gone wrong that maybe in business or in another field that you learned a lot from or you took a lot of insight from?

• 30:02Speaker 01

  I would say one of the regrets I have is, you know, when I came back and I got married and I had kids is I missed their childhood because I was working, working so hard. You know, back then I had PTSD so bad, I had a flash temper. So it was probably some ways, you know, the hard thing is it's a good thing that I wasn't around. But I have a great relationship with all three of them now. I love them dearly and I look forward to treasure our times together.

• 30:33Jay Shetty?

  That's incredible. Yeah, thank you for sharing that. I can, it's interesting to hear about your experience that you weren't there, but you're saying it was actually good I wasn't there because I had PTSD and I was dealing with that. And I've, I've heard in your journey, you talk about how psychedelics were like a huge part of your coming home.

• 30:49Speaker 01

  A 100%, yeah.

• 30:50Jay Shetty?

  And could you, could you walk us through how you got introduced to that and how you were open to that?

• 30:54Speaker 01

  In 2018, I read Michael Pollan's book, How to Change Your Mind. I, I went through it like a bag of peanuts and I, and, and I just told my wife, Renee, who is the love of my life, I never did psychedelics before in my life, never did them, anything like that. But I said to her, if this can do it for me, I, I mean, I, I want to try them. And I mean, I, I got to the point, Jay, where somebody could come up to me and say, like I'm at the golf course and say, you were in Vietnam, weren't you? I start crying. Yeah, I mean, it just, it just, it gets worse, you know? So she had me hooked up in two weeks with two individuals that again would.

• 31:41Speaker 01

  See me in Hawaii and on the first day I did ayahuasca and it's guided, you know, I mean, a lot of talk and the therapy that does the healing psychedelics make it possible because it make you receptive and it make you willing to change. So on the first day it was ayahuasca, on the second day it was magic mushrooms, psilocybin, and you know, a little interesting aside, when the guide made the, he made a teapot and he said, and he says, I made, this teapot holds three cups and I made them strong, so you'll only need one. I drank all three cups and I ate the teabags.

• 32:24Speaker 01

  Honest engine. Oh, man, I was sailing. And then, you know, then a lot, and then on the, on the third day, I took a break and on the fourth day it was LSD. And afterwards, I was a different guy. I was totally a different guy. I, the people that worked with me were like, what happened to him? He's so nice. He doesn't have a temper. He's not that intense, scary dude anymore, you know? He, my son said, told his wife, he said, man, I'm worried

• 33:05Speaker 01

  my dad's going to die soon. And she goes, why? And he goes, well, I think he felt that he's going to die soon because he keeps calling and he's so nice and so forth. And I mean, and it was that type of thing. And of course, Renee, my wife, noticed it instantly. And the best way I can describe it is after being treated with psychedelics, it had been forty nine years since the war, I finally came home.

• 33:30Jay Shetty?

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• 34:12Jay Shetty?

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• 34:54Jay Shetty?

  where product specialists carefully vet items for quality and functionality. So you can shop with more confidence. And if putting it all together sounds like a headache, Wayfair can handle delivery, installation and assembly. Join Wayfair Rewards today to get 5% back on every purchase and start saving on your next home upgrade. Head to wayfair.com to shop all things home. That's W A Y F A I R dot com. Wayfair, every style, every home. That's unbelievable. Do you feel, do you feel that you went back to being who you were before the war?

• 35:29Speaker 01

  Exactly, you know, enriched by everything I learned since. And, um, you know, I, I still had the memories of the war. There's times when, you know, when I, when I talk about it, I choke up and so forth. But I'm not debilitated by it anymore. But it's still very much there.

• 35:48Jay Shetty?

  Of course, of course, yeah. It, it sounds like, it sounds like that you've kept the, the parts that have made you who you are and left the parts that defined who it forced you to be, if that feels right.

• 36:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, for sure.

• 36:03Jay Shetty?

  To be honest, just sitting with you today, like you have such a joyful spirit. You, you have such a like positive outlook on life, you're fun to be around, like, that's all I'm experiencing, that's how I experienced you at PXG when I was there a couple of years ago. And for me to know, it feels like this is who you are, this is who you always were. But naturally the challenge is just clouded over and the experience is clouded over that.

• 36:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:30Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 36:31Speaker 01

  The windows have been opened.

• 36:32Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, it's unbelievable. And is that a practice that you have to keep up? Do you go back to Hawaii or to the centers to continue that practice? Or no, it was once and it's kind of stayed?

• 36:43Speaker 01

  You know, I've went through the process twice.

• 36:45Jay Shetty?

  Right.

• 36:46Speaker 01

  I've went through the process once myself and then once with two of the guys I've served with. And they both came home.

• 36:55Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 36:56Speaker 01

  They both came home.

• 36:58Jay Shetty?

  That's unbelievable. That must be beautiful for you to see that for other people to...

• 37:01Speaker 01

  Oh, 100%. Now, one of the things that I spend time and money and help out as best I can is to get psychedelics made legal for therapeutic use. We're very close with MDMA. Thank God to Rick Doblin and MAPS. And, you know, the rest, I think it's not too far behind. I tell you, when we do, it's going to be a renaissance. And we deserve that as a people. And our veterans deserve it. Every veteran should be treated with it when they come back. Because the Veterans Administration says 30% of the combat veterans have PTSD.

• 37:44Speaker 01

  I'd be willing to say 100% do. But 30% are really good at pushing it down. That's what I think.

• 37:53Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah, no, I mean, and it's not surprising. I mean, like you said, like, no one else can relate to what that experience is like. No one else can understand it. And, I mean, that's a lot to carry for the human mind, the human brain.

• 38:07Speaker 01

  Absolutely, for sure. When those two were treated, and maybe you should have seen the tears. I mean, the tears, I mean, and it's like, oh. They were carrying some, they were, you know, they were there much longer than I was. But, you know, they carry a lot of crosses.

• 38:27Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. What are some of the, you know, from all your experiences in life, you've lived so many different lives, it seems as well. What are some of the mindsets or approaches you think, lessons that you think?

• 38:42Jay Shetty?

  People should carry with them. What are some of the mistakes people make? Or what are some of the shifts in our mindset we could make to live happier and healthier lives?

• 38:51Speaker 01

  You need to believe in yourself. Definitely, you need to believe in yourself because, you know, while there's many books, there's no manual. You know, what we talked about, looking too far into the future, day at a time. And, uh, and also when you're doing stuff, the best you can have fun. Have fun, you know, we're more productive when we have fun.

• 39:13Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 39:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 39:14Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, a lot of people today have a lot of self doubt. When you said believe in yourself, when I'm traveling and speaking and coaching people and meeting people, I notice self doubt to be just such a big challenge. When you said believe in yourself, and I think so many people, even if they act confident and they act secure, inside there's such a low self esteem situation that we have in the country right now and in the world right now. Like if someone has self doubt or they're, they're feeling like they don't have potential or they don't believe in themselves. What would you say to them?

• 39:48Speaker 01

  I would say there's a couple of things they need to do that, uh, usually they have self doubt for a reason. Usually they were not encouraged, they were discouraged once they were raised, I would think. And, uh, that, that being the case, I would, I would say this, uh, this, uh, therapy with psychedelics, when it's available would be perfect because it would free them from a lot of those shackles. Um, and, and there's, there's something that works just as good and it is legal. It's called an SGB block. Uh, do you know about it?

• 40:23Jay Shetty?

  No, I don't.

• 40:23Speaker 01

  Okay, what an SGB block is, it's, uh, S and G is, stands for stellate ganglium. And then B stands for block. And, and, and what it is, is PTSD and all that stuff is caused from the, uh, the amygdala in the front of the mind. Okay. And the amygdala manages, uh, fight or flight and emotions. Well, what happens is as we go through all these unpleasant events and so forth, it gets out of tilt.

• 40:56Speaker 01

  And, and the individual stays in a close to a fight or flight type situation, which is what PTSD is, and, and is debilitating. But the problem is with the human mind, the mind hides its flaws from the person in which it resides. They don't know it. They feel like they're just perfect, except they have self doubt, or, or they have anxiety, or they're on edge, or that sort of thing. It's the amygdala, all right? And, but, so the amygdala communicates with the rest of the body through the stellaganglion

• 41:34Speaker 01

  nerves in the neck. And when there's a fight or flight response necessary, or be it a real or emotional, it releases adrenaline and epinephrine, it speeds the heart up, it dilates the lungs, it tightens the arteries and extremities to move blood to the core, all those things to get us to survive that have been developed over millennia, right? It does, it does all that. Well, what, what is happening is the people that are suffering from this, they're in that state very close, and any trigger, just pushes them right into it, and they have no control over it. They have no physical control over it, even though

• 42:17Speaker 01

  they say, you hear people say, I don't know what's wrong with me, right? Okay. This is what the SGB block does, is using, it's a medical doctor using ultrasound, takes about five minutes. They take and shoot the big brother of lidocaine in the neck, right next to the stellaganglion nerves. It numbs them, and when it does, the amygdala goes offline. It just shuts down.

• 42:46Speaker 01

  And then the individual will get a little droopy eye, talk like a sailor, right? And that sort of thing. And then when it, the numbing agent wears off and the eye returns to normal and the voice normal, the amygdala reconnects and it reboots. It resets and it goes back to the way the individual should be. And the difference is profound. All right. Now, this is done all over the country. It's a, there's a, you can find a website called Stella Centers, which will tell you about it. I'm not involved in it at all. I just know about it and I, and I help people get it done. The people, it changes their lives.

• 43:30Speaker 01

  I've helped, I've helped NFL players do it. I've helped veterans. I've helped, you know, people that, little kids that are just having trouble in school and I mean, stuff like that is amazing. And there's only one downside and the downside is when it's not permanent. In many cases, it'll, it'll be six months or a year or two years. But here's what you do. When you start sliding back, get it done again. I've had it done four times. I have probably helped 150 people get it done. Never had one negative result and everybody just.

• 44:12Jay Shetty?

  And they're all veterans too, or just anyone?

• 44:14Speaker 01

  Anyone, yeah. And they're just, thank you, thank you, thank you, you know? Uh, it is, uh, it is, it is just amazing.

• 44:23Jay Shetty?

  Bob, it's, it's wonderful to hear your spirit of, you know, healing yourself, wanting to help heal others. I can see how much joy you get in helping other people and seeing them break through their challenges and what's holding them back. We end every episode here with what's called the final five. And these five questions have to be answered in one word to one sentence maximum.

• 44:46Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 44:47Jay Shetty?

  Bob Barstens, these are your final five. Uh, question number one, what is the best advice you've ever heard or received?

• 44:55Speaker 01

  Do what you love.

• 44:56Jay Shetty?

  Great answer. Uh, second question, what is the worst advice you've ever heard or received?

• 45:01Speaker 01

  Worst advice? Oh my God. Well, this horse can't lose.

• 45:09Jay Shetty?

  Question number three, what's something you used to value, but you don't value anymore?

• 45:17Speaker 01

  You know, I'd say to a degree, money.

• 45:20Jay Shetty?

  Question number four, what's something you're trying to learn right now? Or what's something that you're working on right now that you're excited about?

• 45:28Speaker 01

  Well, I'm trying to learn what I can do to get psychedelics legal.

• 45:37Jay Shetty?

  In a medical capacity, in a healing capacity.

• 45:40Speaker 01

  Exactly, yeah.

• 45:41Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Fifth and final question, if you could create one law that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it be?

• 45:49Speaker 01

  It sounds trite, but it's, and I don't know how you'd make it a law, but I'd just say, you know, if you love your neighbor.

• 45:55Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, that would be beautiful.

• 45:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, wouldn't it?

• 45:58Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, it'd make the world a much better place. We wouldn't have to have so many people who have to go to war and come back with PTSD and have to deal with the repercussions of that.

• 46:06Speaker 01

  For sure.

• 46:07Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Bob, it has been such a joy, such a pleasure to spend this time with you today. Honestly, I meant everything I said, your, your spirit, your energy, you know, the way you communicate, just, just your smile, it's truly just, it's infectious. It's very infectious being around you. And I can't begin to imagine the journey you've had to go on to rediscover yourself, to re-find yourself, to, to allow yourself to be yourself from before. And it's, it's unbelievable to experience it. So thank you so much for this honor and for this opportunity to sit with you and have this conversation.

• 46:44Speaker 01

  Well, I gotta tell you, it's been absolutely my pleasure. So thank you.

• 46:48Jay Shetty?

  No, you're very kind, Bob. And for everyone who's been listening or watching, make sure that you share the insights that Bob gave, things that are going to stay with you, messages that you're going to pass on to a friend. I hope that you'll pass this episode on to others as well. Make sure you check out everything that Bob's working on as well. Bob, congratulations. I know tonight you have a party to celebrate your new partnership with PXG and Nick Jonas as well.

• 47:12Speaker 01

  Yes, we do. Very excited about it.

• 47:13Jay Shetty?

  I hope that goes extremely, extremely well. And for everyone who's been watching, I hope you come back and listen to more episodes of On Purpose, dedicated to helping you be happier, healthier, and more healed. Thank you so much. If you loved this episode, you'll enjoy my interview with Dr. Daniel Amen on how to change your life by changing your brain.

• 47:34Speaker 04

  Now, more than ever, we need someone on our side. But Rob Whitman? Whitman's votes drove up costs, cut Medicaid, and risked 350,000 Virginians' health care to pay for tax breaks for himself and his donors. He's not on our side. Shannon Taylor will fight corruption, cut taxes, and bring down costs. This November, vote for Shannon Taylor. She's for us. Paid for by HMP, the House Majority PAC dot com. Not authorized by any candidate or candidate's committee.