6 Steps to Overcome the Perfectionist Mindset and Focus On the Process

Are you a perfectionist? It is totally fine if you answered yes! On this episode of On Purpose, Jay Shetty tells stories about how he overcame the perfectionist mindset and provides six simple steps for you to do it too. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by AG1. Are you feeling September reset too? Shorter days, longer to-do lists, earlier alarms, all those routines you promised yourself you'd pick back up. It can feel like your whole life is recalibrating. And when everything around you is changing, it helps to have a few things you can rely on. AG1 Next Gen is one of those easy habits to keep. It's the clinically-backed, comprehensive daily health drink that supports your gut health, energy production, and foundational nutrition all in one scoop. AG1's ingredients are sourced from quality partners for absorption, potency, and nutrient density to deliver the foundational nutrition your body needs. And alongside a proper diet,

• 0:44Jay Shetty?

  AG1 Next Gen meets 94% of nutrient requirements and is clinically shown to enrich the gut microbiome. For a limited time, save 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro at drinkag1.com/onpurpose. That's drinkag1.com/onpurpose. This episode is brought to you by Mazda. Confidence isn't something Mazda finds, it's something they practice. That's the thinking behind every Mazda. With proactive safety features designed to help keep you more aware, more connected, and more engaged with the road ahead. It's why Mazda has been named Consumer Reports' safest new car brand

• 1:27Jay Shetty?

  and has won more 2026 IIHS Top Safety Pick+ Awards than any other car brand as of July 2026. Visit www.iihs.org to learn more. A lot can happen when an accident doesn't. Visit MazdaUSA.com to learn more. Consumer Reports does not endorse products or services. This episode is brought to you by Amtrak. You know that feeling when you're already tired and you haven't even gotten there yet? That's where Amtrak comes in. Leave the driving behind and settle into a comfortable seat with plenty of room to stretch out. Catch up on work with Wi-Fi, grab a snack at the café car, or just sit back and enjoy your favourite podcast. Choose a seller or North East Regional

• 2:12Jay Shetty?

  and get there without the stress of getting there. Visit amtrak.com to plan your next trip.

• 2:18Jay Shetty?

  Do you feel a calling to help others find their purpose? Have you always felt a deep passion for self-improvement and wellbeing? If so, you may want to consider pursuing a career in life coaching. And my coaching school could be the right place for you to live your passion. I have developed an industry-accredited life and success coaching program based on my unique coaching philosophy and vision. At the Jay Shetty Certification School, we will train and empower you in the same methodology and techniques that have allowed me to improve countless lives. The positive psychology-based holistic curriculum was derived from my three years spent training with monks across India and Europe, and further developed by a team of world-class researchers and educators.

• 3:02Jay Shetty?

  Not only will my coaching school give you the tools you need to become a professional life coach, but you'll also receive the business training required to create a successful and profitable coaching practice. Whether you're an accomplished coach or just at the beginning of your journey, I invite you to get in touch with our wonderful enrollment advisors who will help you determine if our program is the right choice for you. As more than 1,000 students have so far discovered since we opened our doors, the Jay Shetty Certification School will give you connections that last, knowledge that heals, and a meaningful career that transforms lives. Are you ready to take the next step to become a certified life coach? Visit jayshettycoaching.com to make an appointment with us today.

• 4:08Jay Shetty?

  Hey everyone, welcome back to On Purpose. And thank you so much for being here. I'm so grateful that you come back every single week. Truly, it means the world to me. Whether you're walking your dog, whether you're walking on your own, whether you're cooking, you're at the gym, whether you're working, you're editing, whatever you're up to right now, I just want to say... Thank you for trusting me with your time. Thank you for trusting me with your ears and choosing the on purpose energy for your growth. It means the world to me. I can't wait till we can have on purpose events all across the country, all across the world. We can meet each other, be together. Hopefully give you a big hug. I'm just so looking forward to that.

• 4:51Jay Shetty?

  And today's episode is all about how we have this addiction and obsession to perfection. How many of you know you have this? Raise your hand right now if you feel it. We have this addiction to perfection. We have this obsession with perfection. And here's the crazy thing. I want to read the definition of perfection to you because I really think it will blow your mind. And I'm not just saying that. I don't think we know the definition as it is. And so listen to this. The definition of perfection is

• 5:35Jay Shetty?

  the condition, state or quality of being free or as free as possible from all flaws or defects. What in the world do you know? That is free from all flaws or defects? Think about it right now. And I know you're thinking about your children or your spouse or your partner maybe. But realistically, what is truly free of all flaws and defects? Now, listen to the definition of a perfectionist. Right? How many of you feel that you struggle with being a perfectionist? Listen to this. The definition of a perfectionist

• 6:21Jay Shetty?

  is a person who refuses to accept any standard short of perfection. Wow. Wow. Imagine you refuse to accept any standard short of perfection. How happy do you think your life is going to be? How great do you think your life is going to be? It's weird, isn't it? When you aspire for perfection, you create more misery in your life. It's crazy to think that. But the more you aspire for perfection and you become a perfectionist, you refuse to accept any standard short of perfection. And you don't even refuse to settle for it.

• 7:05Jay Shetty?

  You refuse to accept it. Which means that if you don't think it's perfect, you won't accept it. And then you will feel the pain from not being a perfectionist. How many of you have ever felt the pain from not being perfect? From not having done something perfectly? If you've experienced that, right now, I just want you to raise your hands, nod along. Because it's truly an obsession and addiction. And instead of our addiction to perfection, we need to focus on action and progress. The antidote to our addiction to perfection

• 7:48Jay Shetty?

  is action and progress. So listen to this. In 1996, there was an event that occurred called the Mount Everest Climbing Disaster, when over about two days, eight climbers caught in a blizzard, lost their lives. And as the bestselling author in his book, Interthin Air, talks about, "An over-focus on the goal of summiting likely caused most of that loss of life." Instead, if climbing guides had been able to shift focus and turn climbers around earlier

• 8:30Jay Shetty?

  because of a very real problem with the process, missing a critical turnaround time, even though they hadn't reached their climbing goal, they might still be with us. Now, that's a really extreme example of an addiction to perfection. Because what truly is an addiction to perfection? An addiction to perfection is an addiction to the result. And what is an addiction to the result? It's an attachment to our ego. It's the feeling we get from saying we did that in that much time. It's the emotion that we feel by saying we're the only ones to have done that.

• 9:13Jay Shetty?

  It's the fascination we have with being the best. And in this scenario, trying to be the best meant there was no life left. Now, the stakes are rarely so high, but an inability to reevaluate during your process can cost you time and cause a lot of frustration, chasing a goal that doesn't really fit or isn't realistically attainable. Now, at the same time, some of the most successful people in the world have something called reality distortion field, or they sometimes have a deluded imagination, which means that they can conjure up things in their mind that don't yet exist.

• 9:58Jay Shetty?

  It means that they can get fascinated about an idea and addicted and obsessed with an idea. But notice, there's a difference between being obsessed with an idea, being obsessed with progress, being obsessed with process, and being obsessed with perfection. There is a big difference, although sometimes it can feel like a very thin line. See, there's no problem with obsession or addiction because it can be applied in the right ways. The challenge is when that leads to perfection. So perfection has some really dangerous elements to it.

• 10:43Jay Shetty?

  And if you're sitting there listening and you're thinking, wow, I really am always trying to perfect my body, I'm always trying to perfect my podcast, I'm always trying to perfect my Instagram post, I'm always trying to perfect my work, I'm trying to perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect. And actually, I always feel like a failure. Chances are, your desire for perfection is what's causing the pain for failure. Now, I'm not asking you to settle. I'm not asking you to settle for less or have more realistic expectations. I'm asking you... To try your best, to work your hardest, and then accept what happens.

• 11:27Jay Shetty?

  Think about this for a moment. I want to tell you another story. This time it's a success story. Alex Honnold free soloed Yosemite's El Capitan. That's about 3,000 vertical feet with no ropes. Honnold trained for years, practicing and practicing portions of the route over and over and over again. Then, when he attempted the push to climb the whole thing, he abandoned it. It didn't feel right that day. Shortly after, he went back and started again, and this proved to be the right time. In that effort, Honnold showed us a few key elements of focusing on the process.

• 12:12Jay Shetty?

  The first step is that once we set our goal, in his case, climbing El Cap, we break it down into smaller steps. In practicing, Honnold didn't go up and down all of El Cap again and again. He broke it down into smaller sections and practiced each of those. But what was critical to that practice was that at each stage, he had to identify the skills he needed, to call on the skills he needed, to create or cultivate to master each stage. So the first step in overcoming our perfectionist mentality is to focus on the practice. We are always obsessed with the result. I'll give you a really good example of this.

• 12:57Jay Shetty?

  So me and some of my friends, this weekend, we went to an archery class. We wanted to do something outdoors, something that was COVID safe, and something that allowed us to connect. We went to this archery course, it was just us there. It was only about four of us and the archery teacher. And we started to be taught how to practice archery. Now, we were learning from the Asian School of Archery. And the Asian School of Archery has some differences in how you lift the bow, how you string the arrow, how you shoot the arrow. And it was fascinating to learn from an expert about how to do this effectively and properly. Now, the amazing thing is, I learned something so powerful this Saturday.

• 13:40Jay Shetty?

  Like, I can't tell you just how big this was for me. We were shooting arrows and we would decide the success of our shot based on how close it was to the bull's eye. Now, some of our arrows went over or under the target completely. Some of them were on the outer circles and some of them were closer to the inner circle and the bull's eye. And we would feel that the end of the shot was when the arrow struck the target. Right? That was the end of the shot. That makes sense. That's the end. The teacher or the sensei or whatever they're called, taught me something really, really powerful.

• 14:19Jay Shetty?

  He said that you think that the end of the shot is when the arrow hits the target. But actually, the end of the shot is the energy you release after you shoot the target. And so he said that after you let go of the string and the bow and the arrow hits, you actually stretch your arms back behind you and then you allow the energy to slowly calm down. This blew my mind because it made me realize that often we're so obsessed with the end, with the deadline, with the target, that we forget to release the energy afterwards. We forget to experience it afterwards. Does that make sense?

• 15:02Jay Shetty?

  The idea that we get so addicted to perfection that we just keep picking up the next arrow and keep trying to shoot the bull's eye, when actually, what we needed to do was allow ourselves that space and stillness. When we focus on the process over the end goal, when we encounter an obstacle along the way or even fail along the way, it doesn't derail us. It simply tells us, okay, more learning or a different skill is required here. Get back to practice. It's a piece of information we can use to keep moving forward. In Honold's case, he had to master each stage before making the end run at his goal.

• 15:43Jay Shetty?

  Mastery is definitely what you're going for when you're free soloing, because there's literally no room for error. That's one of the few places where failure actually could be the end. Now, there were places where Honold, as experienced a climber as he was, realised he didn't yet have the skills necessary to be successful at that portion. One sequence was a move where he'd have to karate kick out to the side to get the next foothold. A move that required a lot of flexibility. Honold says he did daily stretching practice for a full year to make sure that when he needed to make that move, he'd have both the strength and the flexibility to pull it off.

• 16:26Jay Shetty?

  He also had to memorise the route, so there was no guesswork. That's an element of learning too. He had to know where he was headed, and he had to identify the holds that would get him there. And then he had to execute one move at a time. If you get frustrated that it's taking a lot of time to practise reaching your goal, remember Alex Honold moving from fingertip to fingertip and toe to toe, having to get each and every tiny move exactly right. It puts things into perspective. So the first step in overcoming perfection mentality is practise.

• 17:08Jay Shetty?

  Focus on the practise, focus on the next skill that you need to practise, focus on the next thing you need to learn. Don't get lost in trying to be perfect before you've tried to practise. I often get asked, Jay, how did you get so good at interviewing? Or how did you get the confidence to interview? When I first got my break and moved to New York to work at The HuffPost, I pretty much interviewed a guest on my show called Follow the Reader. Every day for nine months, I was live on Facebook Live. Right, literally nine months. And I was interviewing guests back to back to back, sometimes two guests a day.

• 17:52Jay Shetty?

  Now, at that time, I had some of the rough skills, but I learned so much about how to fill in the awkward silences, how to respond when you don't get an answer you're looking for, how to deal with an awkward moment. The point was, it was tons of practice. So when I launched my podcast in 2019, I already had done this every day for an hour a day for around 12 months. And this is often what's forgotten, is the amount of time that someone has practiced something before it actually goes to the main stage. So we think about someone like Beyonce, and you think, wow, Beyonce is just so talented.

• 18:35Jay Shetty?

  She's so incredibly gifted. She was born with it. She's had it her whole life. And a lot of that may be true, but the amazing thing is that we forget the work that's put in as well. So I was reading an article, and the article was saying that according to her Netflix documentary, Homecoming, she restarted rehearsals over 115 days before opening night on April 14th, 2018. 115 days of rehearsals for her performance. And on top of that, she was working up to nine hours a day of dance practice, often in heels, for that performance.

• 19:20Jay Shetty?

  So you can see that even someone that we consider gifted is practicing, is rehearsing.

• 19:29Speaker 02

  Your heart can tell you a lot about your health. Apple Watch Series 12 measures your heart rate every five seconds with the most accurate heart rate sensing in wearable. So your vitals app, now with heart rate variability, can tell you when something is off. And your readiness score can let you know when to rest and when to push. Hear the story in every heartbeat with Apple Watch Series 12. The features described are for wellness purposes only and not for medical use. iPhone 11 or later required. Based on Apple conducted study of heart rate accuracy, August 2026. Visit apple.com slash apple watch series 12.

• 19:59Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by Indeed. I know how important every hire is for a business. If you need to make the right hire, this is a job for sponsored jobs. Indeed sponsored jobs helps find quality candidates when you need the most. You can reach who you need based on whatever criteria you're looking for, like skills, certifications, or location. In fact, people are finding quality hires on Indeed right now. In the minute I've been talking to you, companies like yours made 27 hires on Indeed, according to Indeed data worldwide. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit at indeed.com/podcast.

• 20:43Jay Shetty?

  That's indeed.com/podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. This episode is brought to you by Vinted. Value can be found anywhere, even in the clothes sitting untouched in our closets. That's where Vinted comes in. Vinted is a secondhand marketplace app where you can sell clothes you no longer want and get more value out of them. Whether you're running out of space, moving, or simply updating your wardrobe. Listing items is a quick and simple process. And once something sells, Vinted creates a prepaid shipping label for you. And the best part, there are no seller fees, so you keep what you earn. It's a simple way to clear out your closet, be less wasteful, and maybe make some extra money along the way. And if you've been thinking about a wardrobe refresh,

• 21:28Jay Shetty?

  this can make it feel a little more worthwhile. You're not just letting go of clothes, you're getting more value from what you already have. Give your clothes a second life with Vinted. Download the Vinted app for free to start selling with no seller fees, so you keep every dollar you earn.

• 21:44Jay Shetty?

  Now, the second way of overcoming perfection mentality is to focus on the process. I want to give you my own personal example. When I set out to write Think Like a Monk, I was focused on the process. I wanted to write for you the best possible book I could write in the time that I had. I actually had the idea for the title Think Like a Monk in the book back in 2016. And I was offered a book deal in 2016. And I chose not to do it because it didn't feel like the right time to tell the story. And it didn't feel like the right time to feel like I knew what I wanted to share and give and express.

• 22:27Jay Shetty?

  So I actually didn't sign a book deal until 2018. And I didn't finish writing the book until 2019 and the book came out in 2020. So there was a four year gap from the time I thought of the title and was offered a book deal to the point that I actually published a book. Because I was focused on the process, I wasn't focused on the result and I wasn't focused on the perfect result. Now, I want to give you an example of of how I navigated that. When you're writing the book, when you're creating your work, when you're doing your art, when you're working on your body and your fitness, you want to be focused on how to improve the process. So if you get dissatisfied with your result or you feel far away from perfection,

• 23:10Jay Shetty?

  the only way is to switch up the process. Getting paralyzed by perfection doesn't make you get there quicker, right? And so you have to switch back to the process. So every time we'd write a chapter and I didn't feel like it moved me, I would go back and say like, all right, where which stories are missing from here? Which science studies are missing from here? Which strategies and steps are missing from here? I would go back to the process of the chapter and ask myself, what's missing? What's not working, right? What's what's really not happening here? And that would give me a new idea. That would give me a new appreciation, a new approach. And then I would do the same thing again and again and again. Now, I did that with my book.

• 23:53Jay Shetty?

  And I've always set a personal target of 70% for as long as I've known. I call this the 70% rule. And this 70% rule comes from the fact that you getting a 70% in the UK in a university or college degree gives you a first class degree, right? Whether you get 70% or you get 99, it's a first class degree. And I always realized that there was so much obsession for people getting 99 or 98. But all I needed to was get above 70 and it was fine. Now, you may say that, Jay, that sounds like you're settling. It sounds like you don't care. It sounds like it doesn't matter. It's not true. What I realized is that the effort it takes to get from 70 to 100

• 24:37Jay Shetty?

  means that I may never ever release what I want to share with the world. See, the process from zero to seventy, you can take that. But the process from seventy to a hundred could take your whole life. And every creator, every author, every artist in their heart knows, nothing they've created is perfect. Because they know what it would have taken if they attempted to make it perfect. Now, a lot of people ask me, Jay, when you were writing your book, did you ever think about like, oh, is this gonna be a best seller? How well is it gonna sell? How's it gonna do? How many of you feel like that's something that you think about? That while you're doing it, you're thinking about like, oh, will I get promoted this year? Will this work this year?

• 25:22Jay Shetty?

  Is this gonna happen this year, right? Like, when you're thinking about the result already. I remember I had a math tutor when I was around fourteen years old. And we'd be studying together. I never enjoyed math, by the way. And when we'd be studying together, one day, he looked at me and he said, Jay, do you know why you struggle with math? And I said, wow, this is like, I mean, you don't have to be that raw. I said, no, I don't. I don't know why I struggle with math, apart from I don't enjoy it. He said, no, the reason you struggle with math is that when you're looking at the question, you're thinking about what your parents are going to say about the result. He said, instead of using your energy to try and decipher the answer,

• 26:04Jay Shetty?

  you're using your energy to think about and predict what your parents are going to say to you, depending on the result you get. Your mind is never where you are. You're never present with the question. You're never present with trying to find the answer. You're obsessed and focused on a projected, predicted result. That, by the way, is unpredictable. This was another one of those life-changing moments for me because it didn't just apply to my school and work. It applied to my life. I realized that I spent most of my life worrying about what my parents would think of me, or what my cousins would think of me, or what my uncles and aunts would think of me. And then realizing in this moment that none of it mattered,

• 26:48Jay Shetty?

  that none of it was relevant, that none of it was significant. And so, in this moment, I gained such a gift, to focus on the process. The process to find the answer was more important than what people might say. And I realized this for the book, that I couldn't write a bestselling book if I was thinking about it being a bestselling book. What I mean by that is if I was obsessed thinking, "Oh my gosh, this needs to be a number one New York Times bestseller. This needs to be, this needs to be, this needs to be." Then I'm taking away all my energy from actually creating a good piece of work. Now, what really helped me feel confident about this, and I'm not trying to brag or share this in an egotistic way.

• 27:31Jay Shetty?

  I'm just sharing it in a beautiful experience I had. The day before my book came out, I sent an email to my publishers, my editors and my team. And I said to them, "Hey, I just want you to know that I am so proud of the book we've created. I'm so grateful to be working with you. You've been an amazing, amazing team. And I'm just so happy, you know, that we got to work together on this. And I really, really hope that you know how grateful I am about what we've created and what we've built. Because, to be honest, I couldn't have asked for a better team to work with." Now, I sent that the day before my book came out. And I also said to them, "The book's already a success because I've put everything into it.

• 28:16Jay Shetty?

  I've put everything into the development of it. I've put everything into the marketing of it. I've put everything into the creation of it. I've put every ounce of energy I had into trying to make it the best book in the world and making sure that people experience it." For me, the best book in the world for me that I could create, not the best book in the world. And it was amazing because my publisher wrote back to me and they said, "Jay, we usually only get emails like this after books have been a success. We rarely get emails like this the day before it's been published." And I said, "No, but I'm being serious, like, in the development." I put in all my work in the process. In the marketing, I put all my work into the process and making sure that everyone knew about this. I put all my work into the process. So I'm already happy. I'm already satisfied.

• 28:57Jay Shetty?

  And then another one of my publishers in the UK, he told me the day before the bestseller list was announced. He said, Jay, I don't think we're gonna hit the Sunday Times bestseller number one. He said, there's a lot of other competition in this category. We don't think we're gonna make it. I hope you're okay with that. I'm really sorry. And I said, look, again, I have done everything I possibly could have done. And if that isn't good enough to be number one, then that's fine. The person who gets number one deserves it. Like, that's great for them. You know, I put in everything I have into the process. And so if we didn't hit the number one spot, that's fine. The next day, he messaged me and he said, we're number one on the Sunday Times bestseller list. And I'll be honest with you, all of that was created from a focus on the process

• 29:40Jay Shetty?

  of creating the book, writing the book, and then also marketing the book. So a lot of people say things like, oh, do your best and then leave the rest, the result. That's not true. The point is you want to focus on every part of the process. But you wanna be addicted to the process, not obsessed with perfection. And when you're focusing on the process, you want to remember this. You wanna focus on the process, but you don't want to get lost in the process. What I mean by that is that you don't want to be fully present in the process. You don't wanna set a course and then follow it mindlessly. It's like using a GPS. We can become lost in the autopilot and lose the understanding of how we got there. How many of you are part of this group, and by the way, I am too,

• 30:23Jay Shetty?

  that you have no idea which road you're on or what area you're in because you follow your ways or Google Maps to the T and you never ever look up, right? And then you actually don't know what you're doing consciously. There's a paradox of defining your path or course of action, yet also remaining flexible on the route. You want to be able to change your course. And that's why the third method of overcoming perfection mentality or the perfectionist mentality is pivoting. You want to be open to different courses, especially if you get stuck. For example, you might decide a goal is to earn an MBA, yet you don't have the money to invest in school. You've come up with a plan to set aside the money, but even though you're sticking to it, financial surprises keep coming up that derail you.

• 31:08Jay Shetty?

  Your career needs new tires. There's a medical bill. When roadblocks persist, sometimes that's actually a sign that it might be time to reevaluate that path and goal and pivot. For example, what's another way to achieve that goal? Could you be asking your employer if they'll chip in or investigating with HR whether there's a program to help continue education? Or could you work with them to create one? Or the goal, do you actually need an MBA? Is it the degree you need or do you just need the knowledge and the skills? Could you take courses online? Many of which are free or at least cheaper to get the information that you need. Could you get a mentor who can teach you? Can you intern somewhere?

• 31:49Jay Shetty?

  The key is knowing that for each goal and for each desire to be perfect, there are probably several potential processes to reach it. When we can be crystal clear on our goals, what we actually want or need to accomplish or obtain, we can be open and flexible to different paths. We have to learn to pivot. Another way to focus on not following the process mindlessly is to focus on the beauty, the precision, or care you apply to each phase of the process. This works in a few ways. Again, focusing on each stage keeps us from getting overwhelmed by the overall process. Have you ever hiked a tough hill? Like a canyon? Or heights we have here in LA are pretty epic.

• 32:32Jay Shetty?

  Sometimes I just have to put my head down and focus on each step. If I kept looking up towards the top, I'd be overwhelmed and lose my motivation. In these moments, I just focus on executing the next step and then the next step. The other thing fully applying yourself to each stage or phase does is it takes the pressure off the result. Buckminster Fuller was an architect, inventor, and author. He definitely knew how to accomplish goals, but he didn't just get things done. He was known as a visionary designer. As breathtakingly beautiful as some of his designs were, he once said, "When I'm working on a problem, I never think about beauty. I only think how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong."

• 33:17Jay Shetty?

  For things to come together like that, so that each phase adds up together, creates something beautiful, we need to be fully present with each piece and give it our all. And that means that for bigger goals, we need to build in breaks in the process. Because if the process is always exhausting and never fun, if we never bring joy to the process and get to take pleasure in it, we're unlikely to stay with it because we'll lose motivation. The Bhagavad Gita says that the process of spirituality is joyfully performed. So far, we have many steps to overcome our perfectionist mentality and our obsession with perfection. The first is practice.

• 33:59Jay Shetty?

  The second is focus on the process. The third is to pivot. The fourth is to think about it in terms of phases. And the fifth is to pause. Sometimes, we have to pause to go back. When we're in a perfectionist mentality, we never stop, we never take a break, we never let ourselves be creative, we never let ourselves take a moment to rethink. Pauses are so powerful. As brain science shows us, having a break, having fun, sharing a laugh, enjoying a feeling of teamwork if others are involved, makes our brain release dopamine. And that literally keeps us motivated to move forward.

• 34:42Jay Shetty?

  That's why when we're engaged in really stressful situations and somehow we break into laughter, we feel better afterward, like we've got more energy to continue. I have a friend who at the start of the year took on a 50-day workout challenge, where over 10 weeks, she'd do five pretty intense workouts each week. She recently finished. And when I asked her how she stayed motivated, knowing she had 50 workouts to do, she said, "I didn't think about 50 workouts. I thought about one workout, today's workout. And I feel focused, not on how long or hard it would be, but how good I would feel after. Whenever I get back from tennis, I literally say to Radhi, 'Never let me miss tennis, no matter how tired I am, always told me to go to tennis.'

• 35:24Jay Shetty?

  And I say it to her, not even because she always reminds me, but that I remember that. I love how I feel after tennis." Another thing... Which is this one at a time mentality, one at a time mindset is when we would meditate, mantra meditation on beads. So when I chant on beads, there are 108 beads. And in my practice, I chant for around two hours. I practice mantra meditation for two hours in the morning. But if I think about doing two hours of meditation in the morning, it sounds like a drag. But if I just say to my mind, chant this one mantra, just this one at a time, it changes how I feel about this. And my friend, within each workout, sometimes she

• 36:08Jay Shetty?

  would just tell herself, I can do the next minute, I can do the next minute. And finally, the workout would be done and she'd get that feel-good dopamine release because she'd just accomplished a mini-goal. And she'd want to feel that feeling again the next day. The other important thing to consider is how it becomes intrinsically motivated, right? When we're focused on perfection, it's often about the result, about the ego, about competition, about what people will think. But really, it has to be about purpose. And therefore, the sixth step to overcome perfectionist mentality is purpose, right? When you really are doing something that's deeply meaningful to you, when you really believe in it, when it's coming from a deeper place, you realize it's not about being better

• 36:53Jay Shetty?

  than anyone, it's not about beating anyone, it's not about what people will think, it's because you intrinsically are connected to your purpose. So this is the final step, because ultimately, we will keep pushing ourselves to prove a point to someone. But when it's your purpose, you realize you're not proving anything to anyone, you're just sharing your purpose with others. And that's what keeps you going, because perfection just becomes an elusive, arbitrary, abstract concept. And you realize that reality is far more beautiful, far more wondrous.

• 37:31Jay Shetty?

  And it's something you can deeply appreciate. So remember these steps. Next time your perfectionist mentality takes over, focus on practicing. When you practice and develop the skills you need to do, you will get closer to creating amazing results. Then focus on the process. Don't get lost in trying to get the perfect result. Improve the process. Third thing, don't get so lost in the process that you can't grow. Make sure you pivot. After you pivot, make sure you focus on the phases. Break it down into phases. The fifth step is to focus on making sure that you pause, laugh, take a break. And the sixth is to be fueled by your purpose. These are the six steps to overcoming your perfectionist mindset

• 38:16Jay Shetty?

  and mentality and replacing it with a process mindset and mentality. I really hope that you loved this episode. Make sure you tag me on Instagram and share what you learned from this episode. I can't wait to hear about all of it. Thank you so much for listening to On Purpose. I'll see you again on the next one.

• 38:38Speaker 03

  Now, more than ever, we need someone on our side. But Rob Whitman? Whitman's votes drove up costs, cut Medicaid, and risked 350,000 Virginians' health care to pay for tax breaks for himself and his donors. He's not on our side. Shannon Taylor will fight corruption, cut taxes, and bring down costs. This November, vote for Shannon Taylor. She's for us. Paid for by HMP, the HouseMajorityPac.com. Not authorized by any candidate or candidate's committee.

• 39:08Speaker 04

  For the barbecues,

• 39:11Speaker 04

  games with friends, and game day countdowns.

• 39:18Speaker 04

  White Claw Surge. Unleash the boulder. Stronger flavors of blood orange, green apple, and blueberry. White Claw Hard Seltzer Surge. Click or tap the banner to learn more. Please drink responsibly. Hard seltzer with flavors. 8% alcohol by volume. All registered trademarks used under license by White Claw Seltzer Works, Chicago, Illinois.

• 39:37Speaker 05

  Ally here with cash when you need it. Like when your stylist just did the most. Fresh cut and zero cash. Don't be in... Ally has 75,000 fee-free ATMs nationwide, so you're never without cash. Ally Bank Member FDIC.