4 Stages of Life and Love & How to Establish Deeper Connection to Your Relationships

Today, I am going to share with you a conversation I had with Anna Martin from the Modern Love podcast. In this conversation, I share my journey and the life struggles I had after I left the ashram, learning more about love and dating, and the different types of love we can share to different people. You can order my new book 8 RULES OF LOVE at 8rulesoflove.com or at a retail store near you. You can also get the chance to see me live on my first ever world tour. This is a 90 minute interactive show where I will take you on a journey of finding, keeping and even letting go of love. Head to jayshettytour.com and find out if I'll be in a city near you. Thank you so much for all your support - I hope to see you soon. Key Takeaways: 00:00 Intro 02:58 A chance encounter that totally changed Jay’s life forever 05:03 The two things we can learn from the monks and use in our daily life. 06:06 A peak at Jay’s Modern Love essay. 07:09 Every person you interact with is a mirror of your ego 08:49 Realizing that the path you’re in isn’t the real path for you 11:39 Returning to the real world and relearning how to date again 13:56 A peak at Jay’s essay about his first date with his wife Radhi 15:26 We often we underestimate how strongly our conditioning and wiring leads our life 17:48 Acknowledging your partner’s deep connection with family 18:25 The four stages of life and the different types of love we can share Like this show? Please leave us a review here - even one sentence helps! Post a screenshot of you listening on Instagram & tag us so we can thank you personally! Want to be a Jay Shetty Certified Life Coach? Get the Digital Guide and Workbook from Jay Shetty https://jayshettypurpose.com/fb-getting-started-as-a-life-coach-podcast/ See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by AG1. Are you feeling September reset too? Shorter days, longer to-do lists, earlier alarms, all those routines you promised yourself you'd pick back up. It can feel like your whole life is recalibrating. And when everything around you is changing, it helps to have a few things you can rely on. AG1 Next Gen is one of those easy habits to keep. It's the clinically-backed, comprehensive daily health drink that supports your gut health, energy production, and foundational nutrition all in one scoop. AG1's ingredients are sourced from quality partners for absorption, potency, and nutrient density to deliver the foundational nutrition your body needs. And alongside a proper diet,

• 0:44Jay Shetty?

  AG1 Next Gen meets 94% of nutrient requirements and it's clinically shown to enrich the gut microbiome. For a limited time, save 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro at drinkag1.com/onpurpose. That's drinkag1.com/onpurpose. This episode is brought to you by Vinted. Value can be found anywhere, even in the clothes sitting untouched in our closets. That's where Vinted comes in. Vinted is a secondhand marketplace app where you can sell clothes you no longer want and get more value out of them. Whether you're running out of space, moving, or simply updating your wardrobe. Listing items is a quick and simple process, and once something sells,

• 1:30Jay Shetty?

  Vinted creates a prepaid shipping label for you. And the best part, there are no seller fees, so you keep what you earn. It's a simple way to clear out your closet, be less wasteful, and maybe make some extra money along the way. And if you've been thinking about a wardrobe refresh, this can make it feel a little more worthwhile. You're not just letting go of clothes, you're getting more value from what you already have. Give your clothes a second life with Vinted. Download the Vinted app for free to start selling with no seller fees, so you keep every dollar you earn. This episode is brought to you by AG1. Are you feeling September reset too? Shorter days, longer to-do lists, earlier alarms, all those routines you promised yourself you'd pick back up. It can feel like your whole life is recalibrating.

• 2:16Jay Shetty?

  And when everything around you is changing, it helps to have a few things you can rely on. AG1 Next Gen is one of those easy habits to keep. It's the clinically backed, comprehensive daily health drink that supports your gut health, energy production, and foundational nutrition all in one scoop. AG1's ingredients are sourced from quality partners for absorption, potency, and nutrient density to deliver the foundational nutrition your body needs. And alongside a proper diet, AG1 Next Gen meets 94% of nutrient requirements and is clinically shown to enrich the gut microbiome. For a limited time, save 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1

• 2:59Jay Shetty?

  Pro at drinkag1.com/onpurpose. That's drinkag1.com/onpurpose. Hey, everyone. I'm so excited because we're going to be adding a really special offering onto the back of my solo episodes on Fridays. It's my short daily series on Calm, The Daily J. And let me tell you, it's unlike anything else I'm doing. It's part storytelling, part mindfulness, with a wide range of unique, actionable insights. And it's also the only place you can meditate with me each and every day. I absolutely love all the wisdom we're sharing, all the lives we're changing. And whether you want to improve your mindset, your habits, or your relationships, whether

• 3:40Jay Shetty?

  you want to work on developing more focus, presence, or equanimity, building a Daily J routine, just seven minutes every day can make a huge impact. So make sure to check out the session at the end of the podcast and then subscribe to Calm for your daily dose of the Daily J. Go to calm.com/j for 40% off your membership today.

• 4:08Speaker 01

  From The New York Times, this is Modern Love. I'm Anna Martin.

• 4:14Speaker 02

  Love now and

• 4:18Speaker 02

  Stronger than anything

• 4:21Speaker 02

  And they love you more than anything

• 4:26Speaker 01

  Today, we have an essay about being yourself when you're dating, which is so hard to not show off, just to show up as you. The essay is written by relationship expert Jay Shetty, and this guy is kind of having a moment.

• 4:42Speaker 03

  Please welcome to The Late Show, Jay Shetty. Will Smith is a big fan. I know Oprah's a big, big, big fan.

• 4:47Speaker 02

  Jay, you're amazing.

• 4:48Speaker 03

  Jay Shetty. Jay Shetty. Jay Shetty.

• 4:50Speaker 02

  Jay Shetty in the house.

• 4:54Speaker 01

  He's the go-to life coach for over 50 million followers. He's written books, he's on a world tour, and this is huge for me. He officiated the wedding of J-Lo and Ben Affleck. On his podcast-

• 5:08Jay Shetty?

  Third question is from Alana. Thank you for your question.

• 5:11Speaker 01

  He answers burning love questions.

• 5:13Jay Shetty?

  I've been ghosted recently for the first time. I feel like I did something wrong. Whoa, right? This is such a common one for so many people now. Why do we need closure?

• 5:24Speaker 01

  Jay's advice is tailored for the internet, but it's rooted in Hindu philosophy. Jay was a monk in India for three years in his twenties, and that time gave him insights into the way that anyone can be more loving and more compassionate and more monk-like, even if you've never been to an ashram. Today, we have Jay's Modern Love essay about dating like a monk and how that led him to the love of his life.

• 5:53Speaker 01

  Jay Shetty, so excited to have you on the show. Welcome to Modern Love.

• 5:56Jay Shetty?

  Oh, thank you so much for having me. I'm so grateful to be here.

• 6:00Speaker 01

  So Jay, you became a monk right after you graduated university, which is not the traditional post-grad plan. How did you make the choice to dedicate yourself to this way of life?

• 6:11Jay Shetty?

  So the first monk I ever met was at a college event. I used to go and hear speakers and athletes and musicians and thought leaders speak all the time. I went there expecting very little and thinking I didn't need anything that he was going to share. But I walked out of there with a newfound direction. He was talking about how the greatest gift in life or the greatest purpose is to use our skills in the service of others. Now, when I look back, I realize that when I was eighteen, I'd met people who were beautiful. I'd met people who were rich, but I don't think I'd met anyone who is truly content and truly self-aware. And he was all of those things. And so I thought, well, I want those

• 6:55Jay Shetty?

  things. Those things seem to be worthy of pursuit. So, you know, for the next three to four years, I still had relationships. I was still going out. I was still doing anything that any person does at college. But I would spend my summer and Christmas vacations often visiting his monastery in India.

• 7:13Speaker 01

  Oh, wow. Okay.

• 7:14Jay Shetty?

  And I'd spend the other half interning at financial companies and corporations in London, thinking that that's what I was going to do for work. And every time I'd come back from the monastery, I'd be full of joy and enthusiasm and energy. And every time I'd finish my internship, I'd think, I don't think that that's what I'm meant to be doing. So I allowed myself to live two separate lives because I was just trying to learn and understand. I was, I was very young. I even skipped my graduation ceremonies because I was already in the monastery.

• 7:48Speaker 01

  Was everyone in your life, how did they react to that choice?

• 7:53Jay Shetty?

  So a lot of my friends were really confused. They were just like, what are you doing? Like, you know, everyone was getting fancy jobs. And my extended family and community was actually quite negative. They were saying things like, you're wasting your life, you're never going to get a job again, you're joining a cult.

• 8:09Speaker 01

  Wow. What would you tell them was so important about this way of life that you needed to go dedicate your existence to it?

• 8:16Jay Shetty?

  Well, the two things that I saw the monks in those summer and Christmas vacations. What they dedicated their life to was self mastery and service. And when I talk about self mastery, I mean, understanding ego, understanding envy, understanding what our emotions are trying to tell us and how to respond to them. And the other half was service, that they were living their life trying to build sustainable villages or food distribution programs to help the poor or disadvantaged children. And I saw them living their life in a way, trying to positively impact others. And I thought, that's what I want to dedicate my life to is figuring out what's going on inside of me and then help people figure out what's going on outside.

• 9:02Speaker 01

  You became a monk in your twenties, when most people are going out and flirting and going on dates. And your Modern Love essay kind of begins with you listing out what your priorities were when you were a monk. Can you read that part of your essay for me?

• 9:18Jay Shetty?

  Yes, absolutely.

• 9:22Jay Shetty?

  So monks are famously celibate, but celibacy doesn't just mean you're not having sex.

• 9:30Jay Shetty?

  It means you're not interacting with other people in a way that could be considered romantic.

• 9:37Jay Shetty?

  The Sanskrit word for monk, brahmacharya, means the right use of energy.

• 9:44Jay Shetty?

  It's not that romance and sexual energy are wrong, but my practice teaches that we all have a limited amount of energy, which can be directed in multiple directions or one.

• 9:59Jay Shetty?

  And when energy is scattered, it's difficult to create momentum or impact.

• 10:11Speaker 01

  You mentioned that these monks that you saw, who you so admired and were learning from, had this method of self mastery. Can you tell me what you learned about that method of subduing the ego over those three years?

• 10:25Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, so from a more general standpoint, I'd say that when you're living with a group of men in an ashram. Every single person is a mirror for your ego because you're having so many interactions daily that trigger you.

• 10:42Speaker 01

  Huh. What do you mean triggered? Like, you know, you have a difficult conversation or something?

• 10:46Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, it could, it could be a difficult conversation. It could be that someone didn't save food for you when you were late to lunch or breakfast, right? It could be that you weren't selected to give a class this morning and someone else was. And you start noticing very worldly responses to spiritual tasks and you realize that just being in an ashram doesn't remove your ego.

• 11:09Speaker 01

  Right.

• 11:10Jay Shetty?

  So I'd say that some of the practices that really helped were the practices of recognizing that everyone was a teacher and a student at the same time. This is something that was one of my favorite moments. Actually, I was with my monk teacher and he's in his sixties or seventies at the time and I'm a young new monk and every morning I would bow down to him, which was our custom. And he would bow down again back to me. And I would always think how special that was because there was this mutual respect. And I think that practice was really beautiful because

• 11:54Jay Shetty?

  you realized that you were never at the top and you were never at the bottom.

• 11:57Speaker 01

  Mm hmm. Well, I want to talk about your decision to leave the ashram after three years. How did you make that call?

• 12:05Jay Shetty?

  So it was the most difficult decision I'd made at the time. Communal living was really tough on my body in terms of my health. I would get sick more often in the ashram. You know, you're living in rooms from sometimes thirty to a hundred people. And so there was a physical health component. And then there was this deeper realization that I loved what I was learning, but all I dreamt about and thought about was how could I share this with other people? Because I know so many of my friends are dealing with this, but they're not going to come here. But I really feel the desire to share it with them. And I I want to do that. And so there were these two self-awareness pieces which led me to realize I wasn't a monk.

• 12:45Jay Shetty?

  And I think that's almost like realizing that you told someone you loved them, but now you're falling out of love with them. Or you realize you're not in love with them anymore. Like, that's how it felt.

• 12:55Speaker 01

  Mm hmm. Did you talk to your teachers at all when you were thinking about making this hard decision to leave the ashram?

• 13:01Jay Shetty?

  I did, I did. And I was even scared to talk to them about it because I didn't want to feel judged. Or, you know, you're almost dropping out and you think, what are your teachers gonna say?

• 13:10Speaker 01

  Right.

• 13:11Jay Shetty?

  And my teacher said to me, when I told him that I think I should leave, he said to me that some people go to college and some of them become professors. And he said, some of them leave after their degree and they become entrepreneurs or they work at a company. And he said, which one's better, the people who become professors or the people who leave? And I said, uh, neither. I mean, whatever's right for the person. And he said, well, that's the same here. He said, some people come and they graduate to become monks and they stay here for many years. And some take their training like you did and leave and go on to do wonderful things. And he said, I think you'll be very happy if you're sharing what you've learned and so you should do that. And so there was this really like understanding.

• 13:54Speaker 01

  Totally.

• 13:55Jay Shetty?

  Open view of, no, maybe it's not right for you anymore. It was right for you then and not anymore. And there's nothing wrong with that.

• 14:00Speaker 01

  Hmm. Even in your decision to leave them, they had compassion for you, which is really beautiful.

• 14:07Jay Shetty?

  Exactly. That time was extremely tough for me and it wasn't even a happy decision.

• 14:14Speaker 01

  Mm hmm.

• 14:14Jay Shetty?

  And it was even more depressing because when I came back, everyone was like, oh, we told you so. Oh, you came back. Oh, you failed being a monk. And and then, you know, I was applying for jobs and forty companies rejected me without an interview. And I was thinking, oh, God.

• 14:29Speaker 01

  Cause your resume had ashram for three years on it and nothing else. Yeah.

• 14:33Jay Shetty?

  Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. It's like, what are your transferable skills, sitting still and being still? Like, no one wants that in their company. And so it was, it was just almost like, maybe everyone was right. And maybe I did just waste three years. Yeah, re- really difficult time.

• 14:49Speaker 01

  When you came back to London, you know, like in a science fiction movie or something when people are frozen in those little pods and then they get released after thousands of years. And they're like, what is a cellphone? Was it like that for you? When you came back to London, did you not recognize anything around you?

• 15:05Jay Shetty?

  The hardest part is having to do small talk when you've done no small talk for three years. Right? You've not had a conversation about the latest TV show or the latest movie.

• 15:16Speaker 01

  Be like, have you heard about self mastery? And they'd be like, what?

• 15:20Jay Shetty?

  That's exactly it.

• 15:21Speaker 01

  That must have been really awkward as you started to get back into dating too. What was that part of it like? Like building a social life, dating again?

• 15:33Jay Shetty?

  I didn't really think about dating overall as I kind of, I guess I was a bit scared, but I didn't even think about it that way. But I definitely like forgotten how to flirt. But when I started talking to my now wife, because she was really good friends with my sister and she'd be over at our place and I'd be talking to her. Right? I only really knew how to have really thoughtful, vulnerable, deep conversation. I do remember that she was always very inquisitive. And so that was kind of helpful for me to just totally be myself. That kind of made it easy for me to be around her, I guess, because it wasn't someone that I had to be someone I wasn't around.

• 16:21Speaker 01

  After the break, Jay Shetty goes on a date after leaving the ashram. And it does not go well. That's next.

• 16:38Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by Indeed. I know how important every hire is for a business. If you need to make the right hire, this is a job for sponsored jobs. Indeed sponsored jobs helps find quality candidates when you need them most. You can reach who you need based on whatever criteria you're looking for, like skills, certifications or location. In fact, people are Finding quality hires on Indeed right now. In the minute I've been talking to you, companies like yours made 27 hires on Indeed, according to Indeed data worldwide. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit at indeed.com/podcast.

• 17:21Jay Shetty?

  That's indeed.com/podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. This episode is brought to you by Whole Foods Market. If you're talking about quality food, you can't forget Whole Foods Market, who've been holding themselves to the highest standards since they opened in 1980. That means you'll see thousands of organic products across their stores, from the produce department to the aisles. It also means you'll never see certain ingredients. They've banned artificial sweeteners and colors, high fructose corn syrup and more, so you can shop with peace of mind. Shop Whole Foods Market in store or online.

• 18:19Speaker 01

  So Jay, you've left the ashram. You're back living in London, trying to return to a normal life. You're working, you're starting to date, and eventually you go on a date with Roddy, who is now your wife. Can you read the part of your essay where you talk about your first date with her?

• 18:35Jay Shetty?

  Absolutely.

• 18:39Jay Shetty?

  "The night was going to cost me nearly a week's income, and I wanted it to be perfect. We were at Locanda Locatelli, one of the best restaurants in London. When we slid into a buttery leather booth, I winced. She was vegan, and vegans aren't known to appreciate leather boots. But the lights were low, the ambiance beautiful, and I was still hoping to hear how impressed she was. 'Do you think they have anything vegan on the menu?' she said, sounding more worried than excited. 'They're famous for their fresh pasta,' I said, trying to sound optimistic. But I had signed us up for a special tasting menu, and I didn't know how much choice she would have."

• 19:26Jay Shetty?

  Fresh pasta usually has eggs, she said, but we'll see.

• 19:32Jay Shetty?

  The service is amazing, right? I said. She smiled politely, but she wasn't eating much.

• 19:41Jay Shetty?

  After dinner, I drove her home and dropped her off outside her apartment. She thanked me and waved a friendly goodbye, but the evening had fallen flat.

• 19:52Jay Shetty?

  Clearly, I had no idea what I was doing.

• 19:56Speaker 01

  Oh, I'm feeling for you, Jay, in this moment.

• 20:01Jay Shetty?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 20:02Speaker 01

  Why do you think it was so easy for you to slip back into this sort of un-monk-like mode of trying to impress Roddy? Like, what is it about dating someone that made you slip back to the old way of life?

• 20:17Jay Shetty?

  I think we're so unaware and we underestimate how strongly our conditioning and wiring leads our life. Since I was young, I saw the dates that movies had in rom-coms. I'd done those dates with partners in my teens and college life. And so you assume that I just have to keep repeating this cycle until it goes wrong. And I think we don't realize how many cycles and how many patterns we live in until we start to break them. And it was only later that I figured out that my wife's favorite thing to do, she said to me, my ideal date would be going to Tesco's and walking down the bread aisle. Tesco's is England's Whole Foods.

• 20:59Jay Shetty?

  And I think that she was speaking more from a kind of funny tongue-in-cheek in terms of, hey, I'm simple. I just want to walk down an aisle at a grocery store and pick something up to eat. We don't need to go to a fancy restaurant. And I thought that that was refreshing and beautiful because it showed me that she didn't value those things.

• 21:20Speaker 01

  How long did it take you to sort of relax into yourself with Roddy? And what did it take to do that?

• 21:27Jay Shetty?

  Well, I think it was, I give the credit to her because she was so good at not trying to impress someone back.

• 21:34Speaker 01

  Hmm.

• 21:35Jay Shetty?

  And I don't know, Radhi is just a special human being. She's just like, she's so different and weird in a good way. I dedicated my first book to her and I wrote the dedication to be, to my wife, who's more monk than I'll ever be. I just think that a lot of the qualities I learned during my time as a monk, Radhi had them quite naturally. I look for monk qualities in everyone I meet and I believe everyone, whether they've been a monk or not have them, but monk life really helps us consciously train them and build them and develop them as well.

• 22:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm struck by when you said that she was, even though it was a bit of a joke, like, I just want to walk down the bread aisle. That sort of simple, pure way of connecting does feel very monk-like of her. I mean, it sounds like you were picking up on these sort of monk-like qualities in her even early on.

• 22:25Jay Shetty?

  I think that is well, but I think another thing that just came to mind is Radhi would always say, oh, I want you to come and spend time with my family. My family's really important to me.

• 22:34Speaker 01

  Hmm.

• 22:35Jay Shetty?

  I remember when I first started hanging out at her house, her family would often look at her and be like, are you really going to wear that when he comes over? Cause she'd just be in sweats or whatever. And she'd be like, yeah, that is what I'm going to wear because that's what I would wear if I was at the house.

• 22:48Speaker 01

  Totally.

• 22:48Jay Shetty?

  And so she had this really like honest, vulnerable, open way of being from the beginning. And I, I think that was definitely monk-like as well to just say, yeah, this is who I am and this is how we'll be.

• 23:01Speaker 01

  And it's part of your practice now to try to develop or even hone those monk qualities in other people, correct? That's your books and your podcast that's sort of about sort of training folks who haven't spent years in an ashram to exhibit these qualities in their own life.

• 23:19Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah, definitely. The literatures that I studied during my time as a monk really laid out the four stages of life almost as four classrooms of love. And so the four stages of life are considered, you know, life in solitude or monk life or single life. The second stage is relationship life or married life. The the third stage of life is almost reflecting and thinking about what you want to do next. And then the fourth stage of life is loving the world. And the monks believe that the most important love story is the love story you have with anyone and everyone and with the world.

• 23:58Jay Shetty?

  I think so often we've built up this idea in society that the most important love story is your romantic love story. So many people either go through life single and think that they're unworthy of love because they don't have a romantic partner. Or someone loses their romantic partner and then they feel like they don't have any love in their life. But the love of a brother, a sister, a mother, a father, like all of these loves count. Like, we can't say that romantic love is above or below any of these.

• 24:29Speaker 01

  Hmm. Jay, of those four steps, what stage do you think you're in?

• 24:35Jay Shetty?

  I would say that I probably have a bit of a glimpse into all of them.

• 24:41Speaker 01

  Wow, okay, uh huh.

• 24:43Jay Shetty?

  Probably at step two, practicing to love my wife and the people around me. But I have a glimpse into step three and four because step three requires a lot of healing. Uh, to protect love within yourself. And then stage four is where I want to live every day, which is I want to love everyone and I want to share love with everyone on the planet. And I want to be able to spread love across the world.

• 25:04Speaker 01

  Well, you are on a world tour, so I'd say you're pretty, you're pretty far on your way to step four, I guess.

• 25:08Jay Shetty?

  Well, I, I, I think I'm definitely, I'm, that's why I meant, that's why I said glimpses. Because when I'm with my teachers, I see how they live in that space. And I see how I just have a little peak and that's good enough to prove to me it's real. And so I feel grateful that there's more to learn, though I'm not, I'm not upset, I'm not there. I'm, I'm happy that I know where I have to go. All I'm trying to give people is I don't want anyone to feel shame or guilt for how they currently live. I want you to feel clarity and curiosity about where you still have to go.

• 25:41Speaker 01

  Hmm. Jay Shetty, thank you so much for coming on the show.

• 25:45Jay Shetty?

  Thank you for having me. So grateful and appreciate your time and energy.

• 25:58Speaker 01

  Modern Love is produced by Julia Botero, Christina Josa, and Hans Bueto. It's edited by Sarah Sarason. Our executive producer is Jen Poyant. This episode was mixed by Marian Lozano. Our show was recorded by Matty Masiallo. The Modern Love theme music is by Dan Powell. Original music in this episode by Marian Lozano, Pat McCusker, and Rowan Nemezto. Digital production by Mahima Chablani and Nell Galokey. Special thanks to Jay Shetty's team, Nicole Berg and Annie Gingold. The Modern Love column is edited by Daniel Jones. Mia Lee is the editor of Modern Love Projects. I'm Anna Martin. Thanks for listening.

• 26:50Jay Shetty?

  I'm not in this world to live up to your expectations. And you're not in this world to live up to mine.

• 26:59Jay Shetty?

  I just love that quote from Bruce Lee. And while it can feel really hard to overcome the limits placed on you by others, I'm here to remind you, their limits don't have to be yours. The next seven minutes are about your potential and defying expectations. I'm Jay Shetty. Welcome to the Daily Jay. Before we go any further, let's get centered with three deliberate breaths. Inhaling.

• 27:35Jay Shetty?

  And exhaling.

• 27:40Jay Shetty?

  Filling your lungs with ease.

• 27:44Jay Shetty?

  Emptying them with focus.

• 27:49Jay Shetty?

  Embracing this moment.

• 27:53Jay Shetty?

  And tuning in.

• 27:58Jay Shetty?

  Today I'd like to introduce you to one of the most exciting runners of the past 20 years. No, I'm not talking about Usain Bolt or Alison Felix. I'm talking about Faujah Singh, the world's oldest marathoner. Now Faujah was not born with a traditional athletic build. In fact, his legs were so skinny and weak that he couldn't walk at all until age 5. Growing up in a farming village in India, other kids would tease him. They called him Dunda, which is Punjabi for stick. Eventually, Faujah grew fit and healthy.

• 28:41Jay Shetty?

  He got married, had six children and a farm of his own. It was a good life, not without its challenges, but one that was full and fulfilling. Then, in his mid-eighties, Faujah suffered the loss of his middle son Kuldeep. His wife had passed away a few years earlier and the rest of his children had long ago left India. Faujah felt lonely and lost, so he moved to England to live with some of his remaining family. He started running with fellow Punjabi expats and he found that it helped him cope with his grief. It gave him purpose.

• 29:24Jay Shetty?

  And in fact, he was good at it, really good for his age. He had stayed in shape with his lifelong farm work and when he challenged other seniors, he would win. Then, one day, he saw a marathon on TV. He didn't know exactly what the race was, but he wanted to compete. Even though Faujah enjoyed running, it seemed like a stretch to prepare for a 26-mile trek. But Faujah was determined. He found a coach to train him and several months later, he finished the London Marathon in just under 7 hours.

• 30:06Jay Shetty?

  Since then, he has made global headlines, running an astonishing 8 more marathons. He's also broken several world records, including being the first 100-year-old to finish a marathon.

• 30:22Jay Shetty?

  Faouger's last competitive race was a 10K in 2013, just before he turned 102. He's now retired, but he still runs for fun at the age of 111. "All my life," Faouger once said, "people set limitations on me. They said I would never walk. They said I would never farm. They certainly never thought I would set records with my running. No matter what people said, I always believed in myself. I never gave up." Faouger's story is remarkable

• 31:04Jay Shetty?

  because he didn't let the expectations of others determine his path or slow him down, despite the supposed barriers in his way. Maybe you can relate to that. Maybe there's something you want to do, but people keep saying you can't, or you've been teased for something that's supposed to hold you back. Whatever it may be, don't let outside opinions prevent you from pursuing your passions or chasing your dreams. Don't let others define what your life looks like. Remember, those are their limits, not yours. And as our time today winds down,

• 31:49Jay Shetty?

  let's meditate on that. So get comfortable, wherever you are, allowing your body and mind to relax into the present.

• 32:04Jay Shetty?

  See if you can adopt a compassionate attitude here, embracing yourself and your experience, whatever this practice brings. This is a moment of rest. You don't have to do anything or be anywhere.

• 32:35Jay Shetty?

  And if you find your mind busy

• 32:40Jay Shetty?

  or your body restless,

• 32:44Jay Shetty?

  that's okay.

• 32:47Jay Shetty?

  There's nothing you need to do with your thoughts or emotions. Just observe that they exist

• 32:58Jay Shetty?

  and see if you can gently let them be.

• 33:05Jay Shetty?

  Allow yourself to feel whatever you're feeling right now.

• 33:14Jay Shetty?

  Meditation is a beautiful opportunity to just be aware of your present experience.

• 33:28Jay Shetty?

  And now let's open this up. Bring to mind an interest that you might like to pursue, but you're hesitant, wondering if time has passed you by.

• 33:45Jay Shetty?

  Can you open yourself up to the possibility that it's not actually too late?

• 33:55Jay Shetty?

  What's one step you could take toward that interest?

• 34:03Jay Shetty?

  I'm looking forward to seeing what you're gonna do next. Thanks for being here today. I'd love you to share this message with someone who could use it, and I'll see you tomorrow.

• 34:16Speaker 04

  Mr. President, my company informed me of the explosion on our rig on October 2nd. Causing massive water displacement and triggering a tsunami. They all keep the blame on me. Tom Cruise is. Digger got us into this mess, and Digger's gonna dig us out. From the director of Birdman and The Revenant.

• 34:33Speaker 02

  What would happen if I stopped drilling? You stop, you freeze to death, that's what.

• 34:37Speaker 04

  With great power comes great deniability.

• 34:40Speaker 02

  I'm not the first then.

• 34:42Speaker 04

  Digger. See the trailer online. Only in theaters October 2nd. Rated R. Under 17. Not a minute without parent.

• 34:47Speaker 02

  Espolone Tequila. Balanced, delicious. 100% acave, 0% ego. Just add ice, lime, and your mouth. For a real margarita, ride the rooster.

• 34:57Speaker 04

  Espolone Tequila, 40% alcohol by volume, 80% proof. Copyright 2026, Campali America, New York, New York. Drink responsibly.