ALEX WARREN: The Hidden Battles Behind His Historic Rise - Overcoming Self-Doubt, Healing Childhood Wounds & Learning to Finally Feel Enough

Today, Jay sits down with Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter Alex Warren for an extremely open and honest conversation about loss, resilience, and turning pain into purpose. Alex opens up about losing both of his parents at a young age, growing up in instability, and being forced to parent himself while he was still just a kid. Through stories of grief, homelessness, and survival, he reflects on how these early experiences shaped his worldview, his faith, and his relentless drive to keep going when everything around him felt uncertain. What emerges is a powerful reminder that our hardest chapters often become the foundation of our greatest strength. Alex shares how music became his lifeline, a way to articulate emotions he couldn’t put into words and a place to process loss without running from it. From teaching himself to sing and play guitar, to sleeping in cars while posting covers online, his journey is a testament to perseverance in the face of uncertainty. Alex speaks candidly about imposter syndrome, insecurity, and the challenge of staying grounded amid global success, revealing that even at the highest levels of achievement, the longing to feel “enough” never fully disappears. Jay guides the conversation toward self-compassion, helping Alex explore the importance of extending the same grace to himself that he’s learned to offer others. In this interview, you'll learn: How to Turn Deep Loss Into Purpose How to Keep Going When No One Believes in You How to Build Resilience After Childhood Trauma How to Find Meaning in Painful Experiences How to Forgive Without Excusing Harm How to Become the Person You Needed Growing Up You don’t need perfect conditions, unwavering confidence, or universal approval to move forward. What you need is the willingness to keep showing up, to keep learning, and to keep choosing who you want to become, especially on the hardest days. With Love and Gratitude, Jay Shetty Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here. Check out our Apple subscription to unlock bonus content of On Purpose! https://lnk.to/JayShettyPodcast What We Discuss: 00:00 Intro 01:01 How to Navigate Success Without Losing Yourself 03:10 Remembering a Father Who Gave Everything 07:13 Growing Up Surrounded by Love 08:30 When Did You First Realize Your Life Was Different? 09:34 Parenting Yourself as a Child 10:45 The Universal Need to Belong 12:17 How Early Childhood Shapes Who You Become 15:28 Redefining What Success Really Means 19:58 Growing Up with an Abusive Parent 22:50 The Lasting Pain of Losing Someone You Love 24:10 Understanding Your Parents’ Hidden Struggles 32:02 Protecting Your Dream At All Costs 34:35 Lessons Loss Teaches You 35:49 The Fear of Being Left Behind 37:48 How Everything in Life Becomes a Lesson 41:35 How Do You Want to Be Remembered? 46:13 Living Out of a Car at 17 51:26 Surviving What Should’ve Broken You 56:45 Using Music to Process Grief 59:41 Meeting the Love of Your Life 01:02:25 Finding Someone Who Stays No Matter What 01:04:31 Why Shedding an Old Identity is Important 01:07:14 Creating the Perfect Wedding 01:10:02 Facing Your Greatest Inner Struggle 01:12:38 Becoming the Parent You Never Had 01:15:02 Learning to Live with Insecurity 01:18:44 You Don’t Have to Prove Yourself 01:23:36 Alex on Final Five Episode Resources: Alex Warren | Website Alex Warren | Instagram Alex Warren | YouTube Alex Warren | TikTok Alex Warren | Facebook Alex Warren | X See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by AG1. Are you feeling September reset too? Shorter days, longer to-do lists, earlier alarms, all those routines you promised yourself you'd pick back up. It can feel like your whole life is recalibrating. And when everything around you is changing, it helps to have a few things you can rely on. AG1 Next Gen is one of those easy habits to keep. It's the clinically-backed, comprehensive daily health drink that supports your gut health, energy production, and foundational nutrition all in one scoop. AG1's ingredients are sourced from quality partners for absorption, potency, and nutrient density to deliver the foundational nutrition your body needs. And alongside a proper diet,

• 0:44Jay Shetty?

  AG1 Next Gen meets 94% of nutrient requirements and is clinically shown to enrich the gut microbiome. For a limited time, save 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro at drinkag1.com/onpurpose. That's drinkag1.com/onpurpose. This episode is brought to you by Vinted. Value can be found anywhere, even in the clothes sitting untouched in our closets. That's where Vinted comes in. Vinted is a second-hand marketplace app where you can sell clothes you no longer want and get more value out of them. Whether you're running out of space, moving, or simply updating your wardrobe.

• 1:28Jay Shetty?

  Listing items is a quick and simple process and once something sells, Vinted creates a prepaid shipping label for you. And the best part? There are no seller fees, so you keep what you earn. It's a simple way to clear out your closet, be less wasteful, and maybe make some extra money along the way. Give your clothes a second life with Vinted. Download the Vinted app for free to start selling with no seller fees, so you keep every dollar you earn. This episode is brought to you by Mazda. Confidence isn't something Mazda finds, it's something they practice. That's the thinking behind every Mazda. With proactive safety features designed to help keep you more aware, more connected and more engaged with the road ahead.

• 2:10Jay Shetty?

  It's why Mazda has been named Consumer Reports' safest new car brand and has won more 2026 IIHS Top Safety Pick Plus Awards than any other car brand as of July 2026. Visit www.iihs.org to learn more. A lot can happen when an accident doesn't. Visit MazdaUSA.com to learn more. Consumer Reports does not endorse products or services.

• 2:35Speaker 01

  I slept in cars, my friends would sneak me into their houses and I ended up getting shot by my friend's dad. It missed my heart by a few centimeters and it's stuck in my lung today.

• 2:45Jay Shetty?

  Hey everyone, welcome back to On Purpose. I am so excited for today's episode because I get to sit down with Alex Warren, Grammy nominated singer-songwriter whose music has reached billions across the world. Alex's rise has been remarkable, not just for the success, but for the story behind it. A story of deep loss, unexpected love, and transforming some of the darkest moments of his life into songs that heal. Please welcome to On Purpose, Alex Warren. Alex, it's great to have you here.

• 3:16Speaker 01

  Thanks for having me, dude. That was a crazy introduction, I love that.

• 3:20Jay Shetty?

  Well, it's true, you've had to live it.

• 3:22Speaker 01

  Dude, you gotta, when I die, you gotta give a speech or something, that was beautiful.

• 3:25Jay Shetty?

  I would, I have a feeling from having researched and studied your life for this interview, and even the few moments we've just spent, if that is an honor that you would give me, I will be there. I will receive that very gratefully. Although I hope that's a long, long way off, sir.

• 3:40Speaker 01

  We gotta go on a few hikes.

• 3:42Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, absolutely, absolutely. I need to learn a bit more about you.

• 3:45Speaker 01

  I love it, man.

• 3:46Jay Shetty?

  But first of all, I just want to say, congratulations. I just saw you were the number one song on Variety's Hitmakers, 25 songs.

• 3:54Speaker 01

  Oh my god.

• 3:55Jay Shetty?

  You'd be Sabrina Carpenter, Kendrick's got like three on there or whatever it is. I'm like, how does that feel? That is incredible, that is huge.

• 4:03Speaker 01

  Well, I didn't know that until just now, which is awesome. I don't look at that stuff. It's um, it's something for me. I feel like I just focus on the music itself and it's been really amazing to be able to have those accolades. I, I don't know, it doesn't feel real. Like, that's the one thing that kind of like it doesn't hit me yet. Every time I play a show, I, and I sing that song, I take an ear out and hope people are singing and I get offstage, I go, were people singing the song? Like, and everyone's like, okay, Alex, yeah, shut up. Yes, they were. Like, this isn't cute anymore. I'm like, I'm genuinely serious.

• 4:31Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 4:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 4:32Jay Shetty?

  That's beautiful. And of course, I saw you, you know, did a little share the other day, but Spotify wrapped.

• 4:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 4:39Jay Shetty?

  Top ten albums of the year.

• 4:40Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 4:40Jay Shetty?

  Number four song in the world.

• 4:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 4:42Jay Shetty?

  On the globe. I mean, that again, it's just, how does that feel? Like, how does that truly feel? So there's a part of you that goes, I don't look at it. And of course, you're like checking to see where the, but how does that feel?

• 4:53Speaker 01

  Dude, it's, I see it and it's true. It's, it's like a, there's a warm feeling inside, cause I've always wanted that, you know? And I think everyone would be lying if they said they didn't love it. I think that's the, the part about it. I wrote it with my friends about meeting my wife and that's even more special. That's the song about my wife. It's not some fluff. It's not some um, pitch song. It's just a record that, you know, we actually believe in.

• 5:16Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, that's so special and that, it's incredible to think that you've got the people around you that you're writing about.

• 5:23Speaker 01

  Mm hmm.

• 5:24Jay Shetty?

  Because I feel like often artists will write a song about someone, but then it's a breakup or someone that they're not connected to anymore. I imagine it's a really rare feeling to actually say, I'm writing a song about the person I love and they're in my life.

• 5:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's, that's something I never really think about is when people write like a breakup song and it becomes like a hit.

• 5:40Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 5:41Speaker 01

  Like what that relationship is. But yeah, it's just something where I feel like it didn't happen to me. It happened to us. And it's been really cool to be able to have that moment together.

• 5:50Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, absolutely. I mean, I was gonna ask you, you've, I feel like you've spoken about your journey many times before.

• 5:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 5:57Jay Shetty?

  But I wanted to ask you, what's a childhood memory that you have that you feel defines who you are today, that has played such a pivotal role in molding who you are?

• 6:09Speaker 01

  I have never been asked that question.

• 6:12Speaker 01

  Wow, I would say probably a lot of the memories I have with my dad. My dad knew he was dying and so he it's so fun when I do these interviews and stuff because I get to actually like talk about him and talk about that life that I kind of forgot about. But a lot of the pivotal thing was watching my dad go through chemo and slowly start to break down and he still every day woke up at 5am to be able to hang out with me before he went to work to provide for what was left once he passed. And I just remember, you know, a lot of times in my life and especially now, I kind of think, oh, like, you know, I can't do this. I can't do that. Or I just get nervous and then I think about the things that my dad went through for us. And I can do anything at that moment.

• 6:57Speaker 01

  So I feel like he bought me my first guitar and being able to play music and be able to sing and watching his face when I didn't know what I was playing and it sounded god awful. But knowing that he got to cherish that memory was probably a big one for me.

• 7:09Jay Shetty?

  Wow, how old were you when he was going through chemo?

• 7:13Speaker 01

  He got, he had cancer four times before. I mean entirety of when I was born. But he beat it three times and the fourth time got him. And he died when I was nine. So probably like, probably remembered it from five to nine.

• 7:29Jay Shetty?

  How did he have that conversation with you at that time? Were you aware at that time, at that age, what was even happening? I can't imagine.

• 7:34Speaker 01

  No, I mean, the night before he died, I remember he was so, they were just making him comfortable. And so he was at our house in a hospital bed in the downstairs bedroom. And I remember the night before, the last conversation I ever had with him is he was puffed up on drugs and I, I was messing with them and, you know, I was like, Dad, will you buy me a Ferrari? And he's like, and he was saying yes to everything, you know? And it's weird to think about it back then and kind of be like, that was my goodbye was I was kind of fucking with him a little bit. And yeah, I, all I know is like, you know, he, he died joking around with us, saying yes to everything. You know, he didn't even bother to, you know, say no or mess with us back.

• 8:17Speaker 01

  But he left us all notes. And when he died, the morning he, he died, my mom came into my room at like five in the morning. I remember the time was actually 5:05 exact. And she said, it's time to say goodbye to your dad. He had left us these letters and we got to read those letters and. Yeah, I can say that's a pretty surreal moment to kind of like think about, but I never knew.

• 8:40Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 8:40Speaker 01

  Yeah, I didn't even realize until I was like thirteen or fourteen that he was in a part of my life. I think it was just a a weird messed up joke. I think I would make things up. I'd be like, oh, he works for the FBI or like he he like faked his death. And I, yeah, it's pretty weird when I came to terms with the fact that he was gone.

• 8:58Jay Shetty?

  Hmm. So it was quite hard to actually come to terms with it. It took a few years to even process the reality of the situation.

• 9:04Speaker 01

  Like, I don't think my brain could. At nine years old, and I think back, I really never think about this. So this is like the first time in a long time I'm actually thinking about it. It's like, I remember when he died, I was doing the stereotypical wake up, wake up, like he was dead in front of me. And um, I think it was just a whole moment of me trying to like, be like, stop joking around. I was nine, but I I understood he was dead, but I didn't understand what that meant.

• 9:29Jay Shetty?

  Of course.

• 9:30Speaker 01

  And so for a good good twenty minutes, I had to, I was slapping him, I was shaking him, begging him to wake up, and then they wheeled him out of my driveway. And the neighbors all looked around, and I think that day I I um, I was like, I remember it so vividly, but so blurry at the same time. But yeah, I I knew he was dead. I didn't know what that meant.

• 9:52Jay Shetty?

  Hmm.

• 9:53Speaker 01

  Until I was thirteen or fourteen.

• 9:55Jay Shetty?

  Hmm. Tell me about, you said he would wake up five AM to play with you or be with you before he went to work. Talk to me about what you do remember, because it's it's remarkable that you can hold on to memories from them, but obviously they seem so precious. Are a lot of those memories based on things you remember or pictures and video and?

• 10:12Speaker 01

  It's what I remember. Every day, uh, he woke up and I had three, I have three other siblings. And so he would take me and my brother skateboarding, and we would go to the skate park and get donuts early in the morning, or we'd go to church, or um, I know with my sisters, or even all of us, like he'd wake up early and take us to like Legoland, you know, and like, he would just find. Every day was a different day. Every day was a different thing. You know, there was no routine besides the fact that every morning we woke up and we had no idea what we were doing. And it was kind of like a bucket list in some ways, like he wanted to surf and learn how. So we went surfing and like, yeah. So like every day, I think he just wanted to, his goal in life was always to be a father and to have kids.

• 10:54Speaker 01

  And I think he just sped run it as fast as he could, knowing he was dying. And I can't imagine that as hiding that from your children and trying to leave a future for them as you leave.

• 11:07Jay Shetty?

  What a special man.

• 11:08Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 11:09Jay Shetty?

  Truly sounds like.

• 11:10Speaker 01

  Someone I strive to be every day.

• 11:12Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, absolutely. Very worthy of that. And when you came to that, what was the moment at thirteen, fourteen, where you came to that reflection? Like, what, what kind of made that?

• 11:23Speaker 01

  I always knew my life was different. I didn't understand it. I watched my little sister go to a daddy daughter dance without her dad. And I remember seeing her crying and I started to think what was different about my life. And I started to think about, cause at that point it was like, oh, like, you know, at nine years old, losing your dad. And then you're fourteen, it's all you know, like the, the formative years of your life have it now starting. And so you're just being like, oh, I don't have a dad. That's a normal thing. And I started to think about what was, what I was missing, what I didn't have. And I think that was the biggest thing. My mom was a alcoholic who wasn't present. And so I realized I was raising myself and having to, you know, all of us, all of me and my siblings were raising each other.

• 12:05Speaker 01

  And that was something for us that we really, um, we didn't realize wasn't normal for a very long time. And we struggle with today. I think we struggle with having a normal sibling relationship because we were so busy trying to parent each other.

• 12:20Jay Shetty?

  Talk to me about that parenting each other. Like, what was it like parenting yourself and then parenting when you're fourteen years old?

• 12:27Speaker 01

  It's interesting. I think it was more of like, you know, me and my brother were obviously this protective brother over our little sister. And then I think my older sister felt the need, she was about four years older than us. So she felt really the need to do so. Yeah, I think the dynamic is just different. You don't have an older brother. You have someone that you, for me at least, is someone I, I help through with daily life and vice versa. And there's different things that I'm skilled at, that he is. And I think we adapted really, really well to being able to.

• 12:56Speaker 01

  To being able to parent each other, but then that normal relationship of just catching up and sibling. It's weird now doing it as we had a moment when my mom died, we kind of all went our separate ways. We kind of just realized what the is wrong with our lives and we all stopped talking.

• 13:12Jay Shetty?

  Oh, wow.

• 13:13Speaker 01

  We all stopped talking. We all went apart and I started doing this and um. We rekindled not too long ago. Most of us live in the same state now and we grab lunch every week and we try our best to kind of, you know. Hash that out. It's been nice. Honestly, I'm really close with all of them now, which is really cool.

• 13:30Jay Shetty?

  Who was the first person to reach out?

• 13:32Speaker 01

  Uh, probably Lauren, my older sister.

• 13:33Jay Shetty?

  She reached out to you?

• 13:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, she well, she's she's super, super keen on creating an environment of family. And that was something I was missing for a while. And so she she was kind of the glue that was like, you know, it lets us all come together. And it's been cool. She got us all to move natural.

• 13:49Jay Shetty?

  Was it easy to bring everyone back in or did it take a moment? Like, talk to me about that reconnection?

• 13:53Speaker 01

  Everyone wanted to. Everyone, everyone wants to be a family. I think it's just. Being apart for four years at at our twenties. I mean, you have to think like I was nineteen when I when we all kind of like went away.

• 14:07Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 14:07Speaker 01

  And so, you know, a lot has changed since I was nineteen, you know, career wise, me wise. I mean, I'm I. I've grown so much as a human, you know, and um, I think boundaries and respect and, you know. Growing like just trying to like settle back into being siblings has been a fun challenge. I would say, because it's it is. It's like, you know, I I'm one of those people I think arguing is a beautiful thing. Well, I do. I think even with my wife and she finds it so funny and we'll be like fighting um about like a rug and I'll be laughing. I'm like, this is great. Like, we're talking like, life is about compromise. Life is about figuring out what you can tolerate of me and how much I can tolerate of you.

• 14:49Speaker 01

  And, you know, that's how a relationship works and um, it's been really nice to kind of like be able to. Learn things about people through an argument, how they feel, what what is the compromise there? And that's what I really like.

• 15:01Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Do you, when you look back now, do you believe that parenting yourself? Allowed you to have some of this maturity at this young age?

• 15:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, a hundred percent. I I didn't even I I never got into drinking. I never got into smoking. I

• 15:17Jay Shetty?

  Because you didn't have the opportunity.

• 15:18Speaker 01

  Right. And so like for me, like, I'm a pretty boring guy. Like, I think that's the one criticism I see online and people are like, oh, Alex is just a boring white dude. I'm like, yeah, I am. I am, and I love it. Um, but no, I it's allowed me to grow up really quickly, which is beautiful and sad. Um, but I It's funny, I find I find things that I I love that are childish. You know, I I love skateboarding and because my dad, I love surfing. I Dirt bike, I do all these things. And so like, I'm a giant teenager now, kind of living out that childhood I never had.

• 15:51Jay Shetty?

  I get I get in my own way, as I'm reflecting what you're saying. So I felt like I parented myself.

• 15:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 15:59Jay Shetty?

  My my dad was more, he was around, but he was aloof and in his own world.

• 16:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 16:06Jay Shetty?

  And so I was definitely my younger sister's like father figure. That was the role I took on early on. I really felt like I became man of the house quite early on.

• 16:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 16:14Jay Shetty?

  And I look back at those moments now and feel very grateful for them as well, because to me, I don't think I would have had the skills that I was able to develop if I didn't have that experience. And I don't, people are always like, do you feel you missed out on your childhood? I I don't think I did, because I think I still had some of that in in my way. And there were there were moments of that. Do you do you feel like you missed out when you look back? Or do you feel differently?

• 16:39Speaker 01

  I often do, but I think it's the childhood that I wasn't meant to have. You know, I missed out on having a father, you know, and like I missed out on, you know, um, I think when you learn how to ride a bike, you look behind you. Once you figure it out and you fall a couple of times and you look at your parents and you say, look, I did it. And throughout my entire career of even childhood of becoming an adult and accomplishing certain things, I looked back and I didn't have those people in my life. And I think that starts to rewire your brain of what an accomplishment is. You know, how do you value success? If, to me, success is being able to show my parents I did everything I set out to be.

• 17:22Speaker 01

  And so it kind of rewires you into thinking, you know, what is it? What does all this mean? And what does, you know, my childhood look like? And I think everything that I went through has shaped me up to where I am today. And whether I like it or not, and I do like it, I like who I am now. But it is something that, you know, I think about a lot is like, you know, I would be a completely different person if my dad was still alive, my mom was still alive, and I didn't go through all of those things. And whether or not I want that is always a question I ask.

• 17:51Jay Shetty?

  Hmm, in terms of parallel lives?

• 17:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think like, you know, I could have had a childhood. I could have had all these different things, but I would not be who I am and what I know. And I don't think I'd be a musician. I don't think that I would be here. I don't think I would have met my wife, you know? There's so many different things that I went through in my life that I love that, because I didn't have a childhood.

• 18:13Jay Shetty?

  How do you define success now?

• 18:16Speaker 01

  Truly, I was so unhappy with myself for a long time. I think I just never knew, I always wanted to be a musician since I was a kid, since my dad introduced me to it. And I tried for my entire childhood and no one cared. And again, I grew up in an abusive household. And, you know, when you find something that you like, you get torn down for it. So I just never thought I could do it. You know, my dad introduced us to music and he passed away. He passed away, and so I stopped. I stopped trying and just, he played music all the time. I grew up with Rascal Flatts and Train and Coldplay. And he passed away and the music stopped. And figuratively and, you know, actual. And so when I started understanding what was happening in my life,

• 19:00Speaker 01

  I started playing music and I got torn down for it every day. You know, I would do talent shows, my mom wouldn't show up and she would say I sucked and all these different things. And, you know, hearing that every day, growing up, you start to think, do I suck? You know?

• 19:14Speaker 01

  And then I turned eighteen and I was still trying. I would post covers on Vine and TikTok. And it was Musically at the time. And I got kicked out of my house and I would go. And when I would shower at a twenty-four hour fitness or whatever bathroom I could find at a resort or whatnot, I would sing in the bathroom and the acoustics were great and I would post those on the internet and those wouldn't do well. And yeah, I was every single second I could, I think I got shot down. And then I met my wife and I posted a video with her in my car and it did amazing the first rip around. And I was like, oh, cool. Like this is gonna get us out of this situation. We kept going and found myself back to music. And here we are.

• 19:57Jay Shetty?

  What did your day to day look like with your mom and her addiction?

• 20:01Speaker 01

  I was the only person who, I don't know if I'm the only person who knew, I was the only person who called it out.

• 20:08Jay Shetty?

  At the time?

• 20:09Speaker 01

  Yeah. So my dad, when he was dying, he knew and he was terrified. So he obviously did certain things that he wanted to make sure that we were okay. But yeah, I would, my daily thing is my mom would start, my mom would sleep during the day and stay up all night. And so she'd be drunk at five AM, driving us to school at six or seven. And she would sleep when she got back home. She never had a job since my dad passed away. So whatever we lived on was, was what she, what, he left us and he died during the recession. So it was definitely a scarce, interesting time, you know, we, we still grew up fine. You know, my dad did well. And so when he passed away, it was whatever.

• 20:53Speaker 01

  But daily it was, I'd wake up and I'd find what alcohol she was hiding and I'd throw it away. I can't tell if I was petty for that or if I just really wanted to see her stop, you know? But every addict needs a surrogate. They need someone to blame that isn't themselves. Or at least that's what I think, growing up with it. And I was that person. I was the only person who could call out her problem. I was the person who, when she was driving drunk, would make her pull over or I would threaten to call the police. Yeah, I was the person who made it difficult for her to have the addiction. Cause I didn't wanna see it anymore. I thought that, you know, you're supposed to be a parent, you know? And her and I clashed a lot, you know?

• 21:34Speaker 01

  So yeah, my daily life was waking up, calling her an alcoholic for sure, threatening to call the police. And yeah, it was really, really toxic. I mean, looking back at it, I would call the police on her several times if she was abusive. There was one time she elbowed me in the face so hard that I, I have a deviated septum now from it, and I called the police and she made up a thing saying that I hit her or something. And I remember they threatened to take me to jail. And that was the first time I ever felt like, wow,

• 22:10Speaker 01

  everything is stacked against me in some way, you know? And so like, that was really difficult for me to be like, oh, well, I can't call the police anymore. And it was so strange. It was such a strange way to, to grow up reflecting on it. But it's also something, you know, again, it's, I never drank. I never drink. I never do any of those things because I've never seen the good of it. When people are like, oh, we're going out to drink. I've never, I've never understood that. I've never craved it. I've never wanted it. And I'm not against it. I just, I just don't get it anymore, you know? Cause I grew up with the negative of it, you know?

• 22:42Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Did, did your desire to remove her addiction reflect badly on you? Like, is that where the moments of tension and abuse sparked? Was that you were the one trying to take it away from her?

• 22:55Speaker 01

  Yeah. And I think it didn't help that my siblings didn't realize it either. I think my siblings would all be like, well, if you didn't talk back, you wouldn't get hit, was the sentiment behind it. And I thought that was such a bizarre sentiment growing up. But yeah, I mean, I was just one of those people. I like, I wasn't a troubled kid. I didn't get into bad things, but I wanted to be a singer. And my mom hated it. She hated it, you know? I don't know what it was about whether it was like vlogging or singing or just filming my life. I never wanted to do a normal job. Like in school, I would be instead of like class, I would go to bathroom and sing and film it and post it. And of course, I started my grades started slipping a little bit because that's all I wanted. I knew I wanted to do that. And

• 23:39Speaker 01

  she thought I was some terrible kid. And so, yeah, it was it was definitely a clash between us and it never stopped. Even after all this, she was still alive when I started doing well. And yeah, man, I remember I I had distanced myself fully until I was like, look, you know, I I'm not gonna, I don't want you in my life until you get help. And I remember the week she died, she had texted me, I have a problem and I'm going to AA. And then she died the week after. Which is crazy.

• 24:16Jay Shetty?

  Did you believe her?

• 24:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:21Speaker 01

  Which is hard. But I don't know. I don't know what killed her. I don't know if it was just final and she realized she had a problem or she went to the doctors one day. But I remember, I remember how up her house was. I never, I couldn't step foot in it. But my siblings went and it was bad. There was like, she was, she was dead way before she was, which is crazy. I I think watching two people die in front of you like that is like the

• 24:59Speaker 01

  it's the weirdest thing. It's the weirdest, you can't explain it. It's the breath, the

• 25:06Speaker 01

  that person doesn't become a human anymore, you know, and like the, if you've ever watched it before, it's the, it's the breathing that doesn't leave, like the

• 25:18Speaker 01

  It's so hard to explain to someone, they're not breathing for themselves. They're gasping for air and you want it to stop and it's the scariest thing. It's crazy. Watching that twice at nine and then you spent your whole life forgetting it. And then you turn 21 and you just, it's like a haunting thing that doesn't leave. It's crazy.

• 25:37Jay Shetty?

  Was that at home as well? She was at home?

• 25:38Speaker 01

  No, no, I, I, that one was in a hospital. But when you die from drinking and liver failure, you're yellow all over. You know, cause I think it's called jaundice or something. You're, it's, it's morbid. It's like the, I think watching my dad die, he turned white, you know, cause his kidney failed.

• 26:05Speaker 01

  Watching someone die slowly like that is probably like something that you can never forget. It's crazy. Terrifying.

• 26:13Jay Shetty?

  Were you by her bedside when it happened as well?

• 26:15Speaker 01

  Yeah. I remember the one thing too is, you know, you walk outside. We all just had a moment, once she had passed, we went outside and we all just started crying. And you know, you look around and someone's on their lunch break. Someone's pulling up in a fancy car to Jersey Mike's and everyone's laughing and people are walking by, leaving the, the, the hospital and it's, it's, uh, it's weird to think that my world stopped spinning, but you're just, you have no idea. You have no idea what the heck just happened in there. You have no idea what we just went through and it's, it is so interesting. It is, I remember that, that stuck with me so good. I'm like, why aren't, why isn't everyone, why isn't the world stopped? You know, cause mine just did. It's crazy.

• 26:56Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. With your father, obviously your memory was this almost playfulness or joking around him saying, yes, I'll get you a Ferrari.

• 27:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:04Jay Shetty?

  What was that internal and external dialogue with your mother?

• 27:10Speaker 01

  They told us she could hear us. I don't know if that was true, or if that's just something you tell people to hope that they, they, uh, they have closure.

• 27:22Speaker 01

  A lot of, uh, forgiveness.

• 27:25Jay Shetty?

  That's what you were saying.

• 27:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, a lot of forgiveness, a lot of apologies, too.

• 27:30Jay Shetty?

  What did you say?

• 27:32Speaker 01

  I think for me, you know, I, I think in everything, especially in a place where there's clashing, it takes two people regardless, you know, she could have been a better parent, she could have realized she had a problem and whatnot. My mom watched her husband die and then had to raise four kids by herself.

• 27:58Speaker 01

  How the am I supposed to judge something like that? How am I supposed to say you did that wrong?

• 28:05Speaker 01

  You know? And that's the one part for me is like, I judge her so hard. I thought you're supposed to be this perfect person, you're supposed to be this parent and

• 28:16Speaker 01

  it's, it's crazy how selfish I could have been to assume that. I don't know what you went through. I don't know what it's like. It's your first time living, you know? How, there's no perfect book on how to raise four kids, watch your, your husband die to cancer and be all of a sudden have everything that you thought in life ripped away from you in a second and just have to put a smile on it and not have a cope.

• 28:40Speaker 01

  So yeah, I think that was my biggest thing is, you know, I spent my whole life judging this person,

• 28:48Speaker 01

  not putting myself in their shoes and understanding what they had to go through to be okay. She had to have drinks to be okay. She had to kill herself to be okay with life. That's hard.

• 29:03Speaker 01

  You know?

• 29:06Speaker 01

  So I think that was like the one thing for me that like, you know,

• 29:11Speaker 01

  I had to wrap around and have closure with and there wasn't, you know, it's closure in some sense, but you, I, I don't know. I never got to, I never had to, got to have that conversation. I was, uh, what's that word when you, you weren't talking to someone? It's like, uh, they call it something in a family when you, when you aren't communicating with them.

• 29:31Jay Shetty?

  Strange.

• 29:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, kind of. I, I didn't talk to my mom for a long time.

• 29:37Speaker 01

  Yeah. It's hard.

• 29:40Jay Shetty?

  Have you given yourself that grace?

• 29:43Speaker 01

  I don't think so. I don't think so. I haven't thought about it until now, which is funny. It's such a public setting, but yeah, I, I, I don't.

• 29:53Speaker 01

  When you go through the things that I go through, I, or at least, I can't speak for everyone. I, I have spent a lot of time not forgetting, but putting it on a burner, letting it sit there when I, when it's time to approach those feelings. And then when I do these things, I fully believe in being honest. And, and I, I like to take advantage. I told you that before we started recording that these are my favorite parts of this job. And I think it's true because this is the time where I get to be human. I think in my career, a lot of people look at what we do and it's the same thing. I think they just, you know, they don't see the human behind the piece or the art or whatever.

• 30:34Speaker 01

  They see the headline or they see whatever they want to see, whether I pass their favorite artists on a chart or if I got picked to do something opposed to their favorite artists, it almost, I become a villain in their life without them actually understanding who I am behind it. So when it's time to do these things, I think it's great because I think you start to realize how messed up a lot of us are, not even messed up. I wouldn't even say messed up. I think just the things that you, you tend to separate the human from the art. And I think that's the hardest thing for me too, is you know, everything I make and the music I write about is fully true to me. I don't, I'm not taking pitch records. I'm writing about my, watching my parents die,

• 31:17Speaker 01

  which is so hard to then turn around and swipe on a TikTok and be like, Alex Warren sucks.

• 31:23Speaker 01

  You know, and so it's just separating separating that is so difficult for me to I just have to scroll now whether it's good or bad I don't look at it and it's hard it's really hard because these mean these songs mean so much to me these songs helped me through all those things I'm talking about and like it's so strange to be able to be like oh wow not it's so strange not to take that personally you know so that's that's definitely been a challenge

• 31:53Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by Indeed. I know how important every hire is for a business. If you need to make the right hire, this is a job for sponsored jobs. Indeed sponsored jobs helps find quality candidates when you need the most. You can reach who you need based on whatever criteria you're looking for, like skills, certifications, or location. In fact, people are finding quality hires on Indeed right now. In the minute I've been talking to you, companies like yours made 27 hires on Indeed, according to Indeed data worldwide. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit at indeed.com/podcast.

• 32:36Jay Shetty?

  That's indeed.com/podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. This episode is brought to you by Amtrak. You know that feeling when you're already tired and you haven't even gotten there yet? That's where Amtrak comes in. Leave the driving behind and settle into a comfortable seat with plenty of room to stretch out. Catch up on work with wifi, grab a snack at the cafe car, or just sit back and enjoy your favorite podcast. Choose a seller or Northeast Regional and get there without the stress of getting there. Visit amtrak.com to plan your next trip.

• 33:15Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by Chase Sapphire Reserve. One of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves is the chance to step outside of our routine. Travel is a way of slowing us down and shifting our perspective. And with the Chase Sapphire Reserve card, every journey becomes even more rewarding. Earn four times the points on flights and hotels booked direct. Enjoy access to award-winning airport lounges, three times the points on dining, and reserve exclusive tables. Learn more at chase.com/sapphirereserve. Cards issued by JP Morgan Chase Bank, N A Member FDIC. Subject to credit approval, terms apply.

• 33:59Jay Shetty?

  Want to make a real difference this giving season? This December, On Purpose is part of Pod's Fight Poverty. Podcast teaming up to lift three villages in Rwanda out of extreme poverty. We're doing it through GiveDirectly, which sends cash straight to families so they can choose what they need most. Donate at givedirectly.org/onpurpose. First time gifts are matched, doubling your impact. Our goal is $1 million by year's end, enough to lift 700 families out of poverty. Join us at givedirectly.org/onpurpose.

• 34:48Jay Shetty?

  As I was listening to you, I was just thinking, I love that you have the capacity for grace for your mom. And to sit there and say, you know, no one knows how to raise four kids, watch their husband die, deal with the challenges that come with life. You know, she's not a superhuman. And as I was listening to you say that, I was like, I hope. You're able to develop that grace for yourself to be able to say, you know, no one knows how to come into the world and have their father pass away when they're nine years old and have a mom who's an addict and have three other siblings and cause I'm looking and and I think both coexisting is what grace really looks like because

• 35:29Jay Shetty?

  it's beautiful that you've been able to even have the glimpse of that perspective for your mother and to expand that out into yourself because I often feel that we do one or the other so we often feel, oh yeah, I give myself grace, but I can't forgive that person and that doesn't feel fully healed.

• 35:47Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 35:48Jay Shetty?

  Or we do the opposite where we give that person grace, but we don't for us. And I can, I can resonate with it because my, I always think about my dad because

• 35:57Jay Shetty?

  he was, he had such a complex childhood. And when I look at it, it gives me context and grace for who he became. And if without that context, in the same ways you just beautifully explained, but yeah, my, my dad like saw his mom die when he was four.

• 36:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:13Jay Shetty?

  Um, he grew up in the slums of India. He had four siblings that, you know, were just trying to figure out what to do like it. And, and when I understand that context, I can have grace and compassion for him. And then at the same time, even though I didn't have those troubles or your troubles, there's compassion I have to have for myself. And so, yeah, I really hope this opens a doorway for that for you because it's beautiful that you have the capacity for that for her.

• 36:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:38Jay Shetty?

  And had it in that moment. It's really special, actually.

• 36:40Speaker 01

  I've never had that perspective, funny enough.

• 36:44Speaker 01

  Something so simple, some, yet so profound, you know?

• 36:48Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I mean, you have it. You're the one saying it about your mother. Like, you know, it's, it's just.

• 36:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:53Jay Shetty?

  You know, saying the same about your nine year old self and fourteen and twenty one, but when, when you were going through that, what was, what do you believe you needed most in your teenage years that you didn't have?

• 37:06Speaker 01

  Wow. I don't know.

• 37:11Speaker 01

  I mean, the obvious answer is obviously a parent.

• 37:14Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, outside of that, yeah.

• 37:15Speaker 01

  I think I I made do with what I had. I don't I don't necessarily think I could have had anything more, you know? You're growing up and being a teenager. I think I had ambition. I had a dream. I had a goal and I every day, being a kid, I never thought of like, what? What am I gonna do party wise? I thought, what am I gonna do so I can achieve those goals? I've always wanted to do this. So I don't know. I truly, every day, I just woke up and I thought, how do I make this dream and goal of mine possible? And I've never let let go of it.

• 37:49Jay Shetty?

  How did you protect that and protect your self esteem in an environment where you're being told you suck? Where someone who's the only caregiver in your life doesn't love your art or doesn't encourage it? And of course, you don't have the resources to. How did you protect that?

• 38:07Speaker 01

  I have no idea. I have no clue. I should have given up so long ago. And that is something that I've questioned to this day of why it happened. I, for the longest time, had this gut feeling since I was a kid. And whether you, for me, I credit that to God. I'm a Christian and I faith in that way. But for so many people, you know, I can't imagine I, every day I woke up and I go, I'm going to do this. And I had so much confidence for being such an insecure guy, for not believing in myself talent wise, for not believing in myself where my life was. And I would, I could have given up way before I did. And I never did. I just had this weird gut feeling that this was supposed to happen.

• 38:51Speaker 01

  And I followed it and here we are.

• 38:55Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I I love that. As in, I love hearing that too, because one of the most common things I hear a lot from my community is, Jay, my family doesn't believe in me. I'm in a toxic atmosphere.

• 39:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 39:05Jay Shetty?

  There are people around me who are just holding me back, people with negative energy. What do I do about it? And you're sitting here. You know, and we're looking at a snapshot of your life.

• 39:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 39:17Jay Shetty?

  And yes, we're getting into some detail, but you know, there's so much more to it, of course. It's your life and you're sitting here going, well, actually that's all I had.

• 39:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 39:27Jay Shetty?

  So I did all I had like that. That was basically not your escape, but that was your, it was your passion. It was your pursuit. It was where all your energy went. It's, it's where all your focus went because what else would you give your focus to if you gave it to all the other things, you wouldn't have survived.

• 39:41Speaker 01

  Exactly. I, I never had a plan B. I would go to school and in classes I was posting musicals, like I, it was, it was literally all I did. Every day I would go into class and I would just go on my phone and do social media or post my singing videos and it, it, I was failing. I, I didn't graduate high school. Like I, and nor would I ever recommend that to anyone. I do not know what that conviction was and why I thought that that was what I was supposed to do. And it just, it, I didn't fight it. I tuned everything else out. There was nothing else I was interested in. And I never had a backup plan. I was like, I'm going to be homeless. I'm going to do this. And I ended up being homeless.

• 40:21Jay Shetty?

  Did God have anything to do with the conviction?

• 40:23Speaker 01

  I like to think so. I think a lot of times when I watch podcasts and I hear people say that though, it, it always throws me through a loop, you know? And, and I think like, you know, a lot of times when I've, you know, gone through this stuff and, and talked about my faith and things, I just feel as if I have been put on this earth to do this, you know? And I feel as if I had to lose my parents to be the person I am today, you know? And the things that I've lost have shaped me into the, the, the man that I am. And you know, I've met everyone and, and I'm happy with myself after all this loss and, and whatnot. And I, for me, I battled a lot because I've always been like, oh, well, like if God was really, wouldn't have done that to me, you know? And I think that when you,

• 41:05Speaker 01

  when I look at a snapshot of my life, I look at every single mistake I've ever made and every single thing that's taken away and every single thing that has happened to me has led, uh, been a lesson of some sort. I've learned from everything and I, I understand it's, people probably disagree with that. I think that's fully fine. I just think for what I've lived through and the things that I've gone through and where I am today, it, the only thing to me makes sense is that. And that's, that's, that's the beautiful thing about faith.

• 41:33Speaker 01

  You gotta believe it, you know? It's crazy.

• 41:36Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Do you do you regret not telling your mom how you felt? Or do you wish you got to tell her that you forgive her and that you understand and share that compassion? Or do you feel it was shared in spirit and internally and that?

• 41:49Speaker 01

  No, I think the one thing that I regret is my mom. I I look at this every time and it just kills me is my mom died alone.

• 41:59Speaker 01

  You know? She didn't have friends. She didn't have family anymore. Everyone left her. Everyone left because they wanted to focus on themselves.

• 42:10Speaker 01

  I think that's the hardest thing that I've had to deal with is when I I thought about that. I was, I remember I was driving and I I started thinking about my life and how I'm terrified to be alone. And I started to think about my mom and I realized that she was alone and I texted her and I wanted to check on her. And little did I know she was dying alone. And so for me, yeah, I mean, it's so easy to, it's so easy when people are out of your life. And now that it's happened to me so many times to be like, wow, I wish I did this different. And you're never gonna survive if you think that way.

• 42:50Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 42:50Speaker 01

  It's never gonna, I have lost so many people in my life. And every time you, it's so goddamn easy to be like, oh, I should have done this more. I should have walked with them every day. I should have cherished those moments in between. But now, when I have friendships and I have relationships, nothing matters. But to me at least, any issue is small. Because I'm able to, I'm able to put in perspective the things that I've lost and been able to now understand the gravity of what that means and losing someone. And so I feel like as a person, I'm much better of a emotional person with other people because of that as well. Yeah, of course, but I don't know. I can never think about that.

• 43:36Jay Shetty?

  I I'm genuinely so in awe of your ability to process so much in so little time. And I don't say that as empty flattery at all. I say it with as much gravitas as you can probably say it with because and it's so interesting to me because two people can go through the same thing and have completely different reactions.

• 43:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 43:58Jay Shetty?

  And and everyone's allowed to process it however they decide to process it, but it feels like the way you've been able to walk these footsteps

• 44:09Jay Shetty?

  is allowing you to continue to grow and heal, but not crush yourself.

• 44:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 44:17Jay Shetty?

  Under the responsibility that you shouldn't have had to carry as a kid anyway. And I think that's what's so interesting is so many of us as young people carry weight that was too heavy that shouldn't have even ever come across even as an adult. And you end up carrying that weight continuously and it feels like I'm not saying it was easy or that that's not my interpretation of it, but what I'm hearing is you've almost been able to put the weight down at the right time when you've needed to in order to move forward.

• 44:46Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 44:48Speaker 01

  Yeah, I I don't know.

• 44:50Jay Shetty?

  Do you agree with that?

• 44:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, I do. I I just have this outlook on life that that

• 44:57Speaker 01

  and it sounds so redundant and I keep saying it, but truly I think that everything that has happened in my life is a lesson.

• 45:04Jay Shetty?

  Where did that come from? How did you even get to that place?

• 45:06Speaker 01

  I don't even know.

• 45:07Jay Shetty?

  You just had to be that's it's it's a survival instinct like that's what I'm.

• 45:12Speaker 01

  I started to think about what's the point?

• 45:13Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 45:14Speaker 01

  I started to think about my life and I think I had a moment where I had a reflection, but also had I I battled with depression a little while ago and I started to think, what was the point? Why did all these things happen to me? Why is this my life and where am I supposed to be? And I think, you know, like you said, there are two ways of dealing with it. There's a lot of people, you know, and my family's full of it. My family's full of different ways that we have all endured what we went through because I'm not the only one and we've all gone different routes of that. And for me, I just started to think, what is the point if I'm not treating this the way? I can't control the fact that my parents are dead. I can't control the fact that, you know, life is fleeting and, you know, I've had friends die and all these different things and, you know,

• 45:58Speaker 01

  or even like the mistakes that happened, getting cheated on or it just random stuff that has happened in my life. And then I start to realize if everything in life is a way to another thing, you know? What happens to you is a byproduct of a decision that someone made and your reaction is what follows, right? And for me, if I lose someone, it teaches me something in some aspect of life. If I make a mistake on stage, I truly think that that's something because I need to learn. Mistakes are only important if you learn from them and if you don't, it's a habit. And so I've just really stressed that aspect of my life every day of, you know, growing, because what's the point of living if you can't grow? What's the point of living if you can't constantly try and become a better person?

• 46:42Speaker 01

  I, the one thing I know about my dad, and I don't know much because he died when I was a kid, everyone I ask says he was the nicest person ever, says he was the kindest person ever, says he was a light when he walked through a room. And I often think of when I die, what is someone going to say about me? You know? And so for me, you know, I've always just strived and chased that ability to be like my dad. And every day I'm constantly striving to be a better human and the only way you do that is by growth and the only way you grow is by learning from your mistakes. Why focus on the things you can't change? Focus on the, the reaction of what has happened.

• 47:21Jay Shetty?

  What do you hope people will say about you when you die?

• 47:27Speaker 01

  I feel like a lot of people have probably sat here and said something about their career and I just want to be, I want someone to say that I was a great father. I want people to be like that. Say what you want about me, say what you want about my music, but I cared a lot and I, I just want to be a good father. That's what my entire life is set off to be, you know?

• 47:49Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I love, I love the videos you make.

• 47:52Speaker 01

  For my kids.

• 47:52Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah, for your kids.

• 47:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 47:54Jay Shetty?

  That was inspiring me. I was like, I need to start, I need to get on that train.

• 47:57Speaker 01

  My dad left us home videos.

• 47:59Jay Shetty?

  No way.

• 48:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, so that was the coolest part about.

• 48:03Jay Shetty?

  That he filmed for you.

• 48:04Speaker 01

  Everything, everything. I have hours of footage of what my dad filmed. I get to hear his voice. And I think that's the other thing that no one teaches you about grief is you start to forget the smell of someone. You start to forget what they sound like. You forget what it's like to hold someone after having a bad day or confiding in someone. You don't know how badly. The one thing I wish is I could call my dad and just ask for advice about marriage, about fatherhood, about

• 48:40Speaker 01

  just things you go through. Like, that's, that's the thing I take for granted, just being able to call him. You know, I, I called every day to hear that voicemail, every day until one day someone picked up the phone. And because my mom couldn't afford to keep paying the bill.

• 48:58Speaker 01

  And so that's the one thing is like, it's been so nice to be able to see those videos and humanize someone who I didn't know. I often hear about my dad and I've put him on this pedestal of just being this perfect guy and I don't want him to be. I want him to have mistakes. I want him to have flaws because I have flaws and I want to see that in my dad. And so my, my dad's best friend comes around all the time. He's in my life so much. He's like an uncle to me and he brought these letters because back then they didn't have phones and my dad used to, they used to write each other letters. And it's his bestest friend and he gets choked up talking about him all the time. And he showed me these letters

• 49:38Speaker 01

  and I write just like my dad. I say psyched for no reason. I don't know why I say it. I'm like, oh, I'm psyched. That's sick. And everyone's like, what are you talking about? And he wrote it in every letter. Someone I didn't know. Like, think about that. I did not know my dad. I was nine years old. I, I have memories of him the same way I have memories about my doctor, you know, and that's hard. And there's so much of him in me.

• 50:03Speaker 01

  And that's the coolest part is being able to every day learn something new about him. And I say this and I don't know where I heard it and it's I never came up with this. But people die twice. They die when they die and they die when you stop telling their story. And my whole goal with everything in my entire career, my entire life is just to keep him alive. Which has been really cool.

• 50:21Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I think you're doing a great job of that. I mean,

• 50:23Speaker 01

  Trying my damn best.

• 50:24Jay Shetty?

  Even I feel like I feel so, you know, I feel like when you're talking about your dad, I feel so close to him even though I have no, you know, idea of who he was and I and I couldn't agree with you more. I I feel that you carry a part of the people that you lost, that you love. I had a spiritual mentor of mine, a father figure who passed away five years ago, who I loved deeply and he had stage four brain cancer and so he started to lose his memory towards the last few years of his life. So he went from remembering my face and name to my name to to towards the end, not even noticing me.

• 50:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 50:56Jay Shetty?

  And he's I I can relate to that point of just he's the person I wish I could call to share anything that happens in my life because that's what he was. And all of this took off after he passed away really. And yeah, it's it's one of those things, but I fully agree that I talk about him a lot on the podcast. I talk about him a lot with friends and family because there was no one like him.

• 51:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 51:20Jay Shetty?

  And I almost wish more people got to experience him to know what was possible as a human and how someone could live with. So he had this because he had stage four brain cancer and his memory started to break. When he'd meet people, all he'd do was thank them for their service to God. And so his brain was stuck on gratitude.

• 51:40Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 51:40Jay Shetty?

  So all he'd do is thank people. So he could forget their name, forget their face, but because he was a leader in our spiritual community, he would just, if he'd meet you, just be like, thank you for your service to God. And he'd really mean it like, thank you for everything you've been doing.

• 51:51Speaker 01

  That's beautiful.

• 51:52Jay Shetty?

  And it was just, and I was like, wow, like, God, if my brain ever broke, I hope it breaks like that because what that just shows what's really, you know, in there.

• 52:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:01Jay Shetty?

  But yeah, as I'm hearing you talk about this. It's almost like every phase of your life, I mean, when I was preparing for this, I was like, I, and now I'm getting to meet you, obviously, so I have a completely different perspective.

• 52:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:14Jay Shetty?

  Because I'm, I'm looking at how much resilience you have and strength you have and, and how much you're willing to open the wound as well and, and look at it from different angles, which is, at seventeen, your mom kicks you out the house.

• 52:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:27Jay Shetty?

  And then you end up, as you said a few moments ago, you end up being homeless and living in a car.

• 52:31Speaker 01

  Mm hmm.

• 52:32Jay Shetty?

  Talk to me about the day to day of living as, living in a car as a seventeen year old, because.

• 52:36Speaker 01

  I mean, I had it, I had it pretty lucky, I'm not gonna lie, like, I, I slept in cars, my friends would sneak me into their houses and I would sleep like, you know, on their floors with hiding, hoping no one walked in. Yeah, I'm not, I, there was only a few nights where I actually slept like, on the road, like probably two. You know, and like, I think that's the biggest thing for me is, you know, I, my mom kicked me out because she wanted me to come back. She wanted me to, I think her whole thing and what I never realized was this insecurity of being a mother, you know, and for me, I would just, I had a point where she, that night, she had, pinned me on the ground and just started wailing,

• 53:21Speaker 01

  punching as hard as she could. My brother, who's a marine, ended up pulling her off and I ran out of the house and I never came back. And that was something where then the next day she called the cops and the cops went looking for me, saying that I hit her.

• 53:37Speaker 01

  A whole thing. And so I just hid, I hid on the street, uh, hid in my friends' cars. My mom then called all of her, all of their friends' parents and said, I'm bad news and all these things. And then they stopped letting me sleep in their house. And so I would sleep in a car and then I ended up getting, shot by my friend's dad with a one seventy seven, which is like a BB. It's like a, it's like a, you know, you hunt, deer or rabbits or something with it. And it's the way it's shaped is supposed to do as much damage in the animal. And. It was an accident. He didn't mean to, or he didn't understand the scope of it.

• 54:12Jay Shetty?

  And why did he do it? Why, why did he even?

• 54:15Speaker 01

  I think a lot of the guys who grew up in the seventies and eighties would shoot each other with pellet guns. Like, that was the thing. Like, I guess. And I don't think they realized this wasn't a pellet gun. And it was like a hunting rifle. And he also, I don't know if he knew it was loaded, but we were filming a video and he said, run. I ran and zigzagged because I thought that would work. Damn, was he a good shot. He nailed me right in the liver. And it went up, it missed my heart by a few centimeters and it's stuck in my lung today.

• 54:45Jay Shetty?

  It's still there today?

• 54:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. It's so small that if you were to, if you x-ray, you can see it. But if you were to pull it out, you'd have to break my ribs and it'd be a chance I would die. And it's just not worth it. It's capsulized into my lung right now, my right lung.

• 54:58Jay Shetty?

  Talk to me about how it felt in the moment. I mean, that's excruciating.

• 55:01Speaker 01

  Have you ever seen those videos of paintballs hitting your body in slow motion?

• 55:03Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 55:04Speaker 01

  It felt like that. It hit a nerve. I jumped up. I broke my elbow. Or I fractured it or whatever. And I just remember the worst pain you'll ever feel in your entire life. I don't know what it's like to get shot with a nine mil, but that was like, it was burning in my body. And I was scratching my chest, trying to just get the pain. I was like, make it stop, please. And I remember when I was shot, they didn't believe it was in me. They thought I was walking around. And so they were squeezing the wound, trying to get the pellet out, thinking it was at surface level, not realizing I was bleeding internally. And yeah, I remember that was probably the worst pain I've ever felt in my entire life is feeling the pellet burn or bullet.

• 55:48Speaker 01

  Technically, it's a bullet burning in my body. That was hard. That one sucked.

• 55:53Jay Shetty?

  Did you go to the hospital with me?

• 55:54Speaker 01

  Yes. Yeah, I went to the hospital. They admitted me for a gunshot wound. I had the cops come because every time you admit anyone to the, to the hospital for a GSW, the cops come. This guy, I, he's funny enough. He officiated my wedding.

• 56:09Jay Shetty?

  Guy who shot you?

• 56:10Speaker 01

  Huge part of my life, actually. He's a huge part of my life. He was a father figure to me when my dad passed away and he made a mistake.

• 56:18Speaker 01

  I'm also probably the most forgiving person you'll ever meet.

• 56:20Jay Shetty?

  You're literally like, I think Alex, we need to slow down here.

• 56:24Speaker 01

  No, he's amazing. He's truly like, his family has been such a crucial part of my life and in my recovery, like not recovery, but in my life of becoming who I am today, he has been, he's someone I still go back home and visit. And he officiated my wedding. His daughter is my best friend since I was 13.

• 56:41Speaker 01

  And he was letting me sleep on the floor of his house and sleep, uh, sleep in his car. And when this happened, he obviously paid the hospital bills and he, uh, bought me a, he, he owns a Volvo dealership or he manages a Volvo dealership. And so I had a car and, um, I slept in it, which was awesome. So I, the car that I had, it was a stick shift 1994 wagon. It was great. Volvo wagon.

• 57:04Jay Shetty?

  How long did that recovery take?

• 57:06Speaker 01

  Recovery? I was in the hospital for two months, maybe a month and a half.

• 57:11Jay Shetty?

  And you said it just missed your heart?

• 57:12Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 57:13Jay Shetty?

  And it's still in your lung?

• 57:15Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 57:16Jay Shetty?

  But it can't do any damage in there?

• 57:18Speaker 01

  Uh, if I fall from a certain height is what they said. If I like fall to my body at 10 feet, maybe.

• 57:23Jay Shetty?

  So no flips?

• 57:25Speaker 01

  I still flip.

• 57:27Jay Shetty?

  Like, but it's not something you think about. Like it's, it doesn't cause any pain. Like you don't.

• 57:31Speaker 01

  Sometimes.

• 57:32Jay Shetty?

  Oh.

• 57:32Speaker 01

  Sometimes.

• 57:33Jay Shetty?

  What about for singing and like?

• 57:34Speaker 01

  I, I don't know. I, I need to get my lungs checked out, especially because I just, I quit smoking three years ago. When I was homeless, that was something I really got into was smoking cigarettes. And I went to vaping. And so I really want to get my lungs checked out, especially having cancer run in my family.

• 57:48Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 57:49Speaker 01

  But, um, yeah, I, I, I need to get that checked out. I have no idea.

• 57:53Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 57:54Speaker 01

  All I know is I, I sing my little tukish out.

• 57:57Jay Shetty?

  That's, that's crazy.

• 57:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 57:59Jay Shetty?

  I mean, I mean, like, it's just almost like, I mean, I'm in shock right now because it's, it's just thing after thing after thing after thing. I mean, it's, you know.

• 58:09Speaker 01

  Sounds fake.

• 58:10Jay Shetty?

  No, no, I, I, I didn't, I didn't feel that. I just feel like it's, it's, um, it's hard. And it's, it's just like. It it doesn't sound fake to me, it just sounds.

• 58:20Speaker 01

  Oh, I say it all the time.

• 58:21Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 58:22Speaker 01

  It it doesn't sound real.

• 58:23Jay Shetty?

  It doesn't sound real in the sense of just like you can't believe someone survived it all. That's that's the hard part. It's like, how how did someone survive it all and not end up? You know, it's almost like, how did someone survive it all? And have the approach you have to it?

• 58:39Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 58:39Jay Shetty?

  That's what, like, sitting with you here today.

• 58:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 58:42Jay Shetty?

  Knowing all of this and then hearing about it from you in detail and I'm like, how do you not, how do you not, you know?

• 58:49Speaker 01

  Have a vice? How do I not have a vice of sorts?

• 58:52Jay Shetty?

  No, no, it's not even.

• 58:53Speaker 01

  No, I get it.

• 58:54Jay Shetty?

  It's just how you just.

• 58:55Speaker 01

  Gone in a fully different direction.

• 58:56Jay Shetty?

  Hundred percent, yeah.

• 58:57Speaker 01

  Huge different outlook.

• 58:58Jay Shetty?

  That's what I mean. It's it's the outlook that is the most profound to me. And and I'm really grateful for that. Like, it's it's quite, it's beautiful to sit with that because I'm always looking for. I was on tour this year, earlier this year, and I met this young girl who, her story's just stayed with me ever since. And it was like, she, she was, she's from here, she was a world champion cheerleader, um, winning all these competitions, traveling across the country, performing, et cetera, you know? Everything that cheerleaders do. And then she had a freak accident.

• 59:36Jay Shetty?

  Broke her, you know, broke her back spine. She's a quadriplegic now. She is paralyzed from her hands down. I met her in her wheelchair that she'd come to my event. She's nineteen years old. She was sixteen when it happened.

• 59:52Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 59:52Jay Shetty?

  And she was just bright and beaming and like the light in the, like, she was just, you know, brought so much light into the room.

• 1:00:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:00:00Jay Shetty?

  And I just couldn't believe, like, someone who'd been through that, she was telling me her story, could be that, like, you know, that powerful and vibrant and and everything else. And it, and I I tell her story and and I'm so grateful I get to share yours on the platform because these are the kind of stories that inspire me. And make me look for the lesson and make me look for the gift and make me look, because it's stories like yours and stories like hers and stories like so many others that I've had the fortune of talking to or people I look forward to meeting in the future that inspire me in my darkest moments, um, which are not as dark as that, not to compare, but they're not. And so, or as yours and

• 1:00:42Jay Shetty?

  yeah, it's it's it's beautiful to think that you can find beauty and create beauty. Through so much.

• 1:00:49Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's it's more it's inspiration for me just to be able to. Dude, growing up, I I wanted an outlet and music and I didn't know it. I didn't find it. I didn't see it, you know, until heard Lewis Capaldi when I was like eighteen. I think I was eighteen when I heard Lewis and he started writing about loss and that was something that was hugely inspiration for me like I I write about that now and that was a lot of that got me through a lot of stuff, you know, and so I think that was the biggest thing was like I wanted to be that for someone else. I wanted to help other people whom I think the one thing that I did that was super selfish was assume that this was all me. I assumed that this only happens to me and I'm the only one who has lost his parents and I'm the only one who goes through these feelings.

• 1:01:34Speaker 01

  And as I started playing these shows and as I started to write these songs, I've realized that it's it's way more than you think. No matter who you are, no matter what you do, no matter how much you make or what your skin color is, you you go through loss. You understand that you have you have things that you lose every day, your family members, your friends, your loved ones, you your dog. And that's the one thing that's universally, I think, connect everyone is understanding that piece of you that is gone and everyone tries not to talk about it. And so it's been the most beautiful thing about making music was has been able to be a it's one thing you can't articulate. When you lose someone and going through grief, it's something you cannot articulate. You don't know how to go through it and everyone has a different vice on how to and I think that's the biggest thing is making music that sounds like it, making music that

• 1:02:19Speaker 01

  allows you to articulate that feeling, you know, and so I've just been really focusing on that.

• 1:02:24Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I think that's I mean, especially for things that can't be put into words, it feels like that's exactly where music comes to heal.

• 1:02:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:02:33Jay Shetty?

  Because you feel seen, you feel heard, you feel understood without having to say anything.

• 1:02:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:02:38Jay Shetty?

  You can just put it on and and it's it's amazing to hear that Lewis was doing that. Was there any other artists that you feel have opened that up and and gone there to that extent that impacted you?

• 1:02:50Speaker 01

  Probably Shawn Mendes. I think, we were talking about Shawn earlier too, and Shawn is,

• 1:02:56Speaker 01

  when I first wrote my first song, I fully, I'm so sorry Shawn, I ripped off Stitches, fully. I stole the four chords that he did and I would just move the capo around. And that's obviously a version before, but that was a huge thing. I, songwriting, my first four years of my life, songwriting was just Shawn Mendes, Stitches chords, moving around a capo. And because I didn't know how to play guitar. And it was a huge inspiration, just listening to songwriting too, and understanding, you know, his, you know, understanding different ways people grow up and different things they go through. And his songwriting was a huge inspiration for mine. So, yeah, probably him.

• 1:03:33Jay Shetty?

  We love Shawn. He's been a guest on the show too. And he's, yeah, he's a special man. Yeah. So wait, all of your music knowledge is fully self-taught?

• 1:03:42Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah, not until I was about 20, 21, I really put out my first song. And I was like, I need to take this, I need to do this and throw my whole, my, everything into it. I wanted to do it right. I wanted to obviously, because music, I had such a weird relationship with it my entire life, that I definitely have really bad imposter syndrome. So I started taking music theory lessons. I started taking piano lessons. I take vocal lessons three times a week, if not more, still to this day, for the last four years of my life. I started taking guitar lessons and, you know, asking how to produce. And like, you know, when I'm in the studio, how, what do you do to my voice? How do you do that? What do you do to this instrument? How do you compress that?

• 1:04:23Speaker 01

  How do you EQ that? And when I'm doing my in-ear monitors, what's the frequency you're taking out? What is auto-tuned at? Is it 440 or 432? And I think it's really interesting, just learning about it and kind of starting from scratch and reevaluating what you understand about music. So, yeah, I was self-taught for a very long time, and then I really wanted to understand it all.

• 1:04:45Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I love hearing the balance of both, of just this pure passion and then mastery, it sounds like, where you're actually trying to put in the hours and the work and the, you know, the reps in a more formal capacity at the same time as having this years of just singing or musically or posting a video when there wasn't any training or structure around.

• 1:05:07Speaker 01

  Yeah. Yeah, I had to do it all myself. And I realized that I was fortunate enough to be able to have

• 1:05:13Speaker 01

  An arsenal of of help. And so I just took it.

• 1:05:16Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. What did it? What did it feel like? You talked about you mentioned it earlier and I'm kind of looping back to it, but you talked about like how when you met your now wife, Kova.

• 1:05:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:05:26Jay Shetty?

  Like that, there was something special about that connection. And I believe you met on Snapchat.

• 1:05:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:05:31Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, which is, which is amazing. Talk, talk to me about how that happens. Talk.

• 1:05:35Speaker 01

  New Age, it's the New Age Romeo and Juliet.

• 1:05:37Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:38Speaker 01

  No, um, she, my friend had moved to Hawaii. She's from Hawaii and my friend had moved in with her and they were friends. And so she would throw my wife Kova on her story a lot. And there was this photo and so funny because I tell the story all the time and she's like, I hate that photo. My wife can sleep anywhere at any time, in any position, anytime. Like I've, we, I, she comes surfing with me in the morning and she'll fall asleep on the rock. Like, I'm not kidding. There's photos of her sleeping on rocks. There's a photo of her, the first photo I ever saw of her was her sleeping in a weird position like this. And I texted my friend and I said, that's the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. And we started talking on Snapchat. Yeah.

• 1:06:29Speaker 02

  Your heart can tell you a lot about your health. Apple Watch Series 12 measures your heart rate every five seconds with the most accurate heart rate sensing in a wearable. So your vitals app, now with heart rate variability, can tell you when something is off. And your readiness score can let you know when to rest and when to push. Hear the story in every heartbeat with Apple Watch Series 12. The features described are for wellness purposes only and not for medical use. iPhone 11 or later required. Based on Apple conducted study of heart rate accuracy, August 2026. Visit apple.com slash Apple Watch Series 12.

• 1:06:58Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by Orange Theory Fitness. One of the best investments you can make is in your own strength. The choices you make today can help shape how you feel for years to come. Orange Theory Fitness provides a one hour workout to build strength, burn fat and build muscle with an expert coach guiding you every step of the way. Head to orangetheory.com slash onpurpose to learn more and get your first class free. Orange Theory Fitness, helping people live longer, more vibrant lives. Terms and conditions apply. See webpage in studio for details. This episode is brought to you by Wayfair. Home should be a place that feels like a sanctuary, a space that truly reflects who you are. But it can be challenging to balance style, budget, and endless options.

• 1:07:42Jay Shetty?

  I was looking to create a dedicated, calm space for my morning meditation and reading, but I was struggling to find pieces that felt grounding but could also stand up to daily use. I went on Wayfair and found a beautiful, solid wood accent chair and a bookshelf. Now that corner is my favorite place to anchor my day. The quality is incredible, it's built to last, and it completely shifted the energy of the room. Plus, you can shop with Wayfair Verified, where product specialists carefully vet items for quality and functionality, so you can shop with more confidence. And if putting it all together sounds like a headache, Wayfair can handle delivery, installation, and assembly. Join Wayfair Rewards today to get 5% back on every purchase and start saving on your next home upgrade.

• 1:08:26Jay Shetty?

  Head to wayfair.com to shop all things home. That's W A Y F A I R dot com. Wayfair, every style, every home.

• 1:08:45Jay Shetty?

  What part of you did you share with Cover that you think was hidden until then? Like, was there something that Cover brought out of you that you didn't even know you had within yourself? Seems like you have such a special relationship.

• 1:08:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, I don't know a single girl who would find out that I'm homeless and go, "Cool, let's do it." She dropped out of college, she had 500 bucks saved up, that's it. She found out I was sleeping in a car and immediately was like, "All right, cool, like, let's do it."

• 1:09:14Jay Shetty?

  That is the crazy, I am like, I cannot believe, she's amazing.

• 1:09:19Speaker 01

  I know, she's, she's, I, I'm...

• 1:09:23Jay Shetty?

  Have you asked her, like, why she said yes to that, like, why?

• 1:09:25Speaker 01

  No, actually. I should I should examine that. You're right.

• 1:09:29Jay Shetty?

  Next time I want her on the podcast with you.

• 1:09:31Speaker 01

  I didn't I I didn't expect when she said yes to go, why? I was like, yeah, dude, I'm not gonna question this.

• 1:09:37Jay Shetty?

  Ask her like you were like you were dating, things were going good. Did you ask her to move in with you? Like, was it that kind?

• 1:09:42Speaker 01

  No, she just she did it. She it was it was straight up like I was sleeping in my car. She was staying with a friend because she lived in Hawaii, but she came out to California just to visit. And then she was like, oh, cool. Yeah. And moved out of her friend's house, moved into my car. She had options. She she she picks probably the one that no one would have picked. And I think that's the thing. It taught me for me like that's something I probably would have done. You know, as I've said all these stories now, I feel like I'm one of those people who

• 1:10:14Speaker 01

  I trust my gut and it seemed like her gut was that and she didn't question it. And I I feel like that was kind of the indication of like, wow, this isn't a normal person. This is my person.

• 1:10:24Jay Shetty?

  How were your relationship before that? Did you have time for relationships? What did they look like through your teens?

• 1:10:28Speaker 01

  I was notoriously cheated on. I was. Well, I think I I think I looked for what I was missing in my home life and and girls. I mean, I've met my wife when I was eighteen. So like, you gotta think

• 1:10:42Speaker 01

  all everything before that was probably not real, but we're not real, but just not necessarily, I would say, mature. I I was a clingy guy, like I was a super clingy guy who needed, you know, who didn't trust anyone. I got cheated on every relationship. I was not a catch by any means, you know? So I think relationships before were just me trying to figure out who I was, but also what I wanted in a partner. You know?

• 1:11:09Jay Shetty?

  Was it difficult accepting love from Kova because you'd not had consistent love before?

• 1:11:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, it was definitely. I I took me a second to be secure with my relationship. Probably took me a year or two, to be frank with you, man. I I I don't think I. Was secure at all. I think I just had so much baggage. I had so much shit in my life. I, my mom was alive at the time and my mom made it a mission to make my life hell. So my mom said some pretty choice words to my girlfriend or now wife at the, at the time.

• 1:11:38Jay Shetty?

  What did she say?

• 1:11:39Speaker 01

  She sent her whole message, pretty much being like, you know, calling her a whore and saying all these things. My mom was probably the most, my mom was an amazing person, but when she was drunk, she was probably the most racist, homophobic, rude person I ever grew up with, which kind of showed me. My mom, I will say this, and again, I love my mother, but she showed me exactly who I didn't want to be, you know? And hence why I go by Alex Warren. It's my mom. I, I didn't want anything my mom did ever reflect on me because I am not that person. I never want to be that person. And so I started going by my not real name because I never wanted that part of that to be associated with me. But my mom was not a kind person when she was drunk.

• 1:12:23Speaker 01

  And she made it a mission to attack anyone in her life. Which is probably an insecurity thing in herself.

• 1:12:30Jay Shetty?

  Was the name change, an identity shift unsettling or did it just feel?

• 1:12:34Speaker 01

  It felt right. Felt normal. Felt, felt, it gave me so much easement, you know? My mom was just very vocal about things that I didn't agree with, which I feel like everyone has that. You know, I can't, I don't think Thanksgivings are necessarily everyone's favorite thing, you know?

• 1:12:53Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Wait, who did you celebrate Thanksgiving with?

• 1:12:55Speaker 01

  Family. Yeah, yeah. My older sister and my brother. Yeah. And yeah. So we went out and we went to their house for Thanksgiving, which was nice.

• 1:13:02Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. How, how cathartic was it to have your music career take off in the same year as your mom passed away? Like, did that mean something to you? Did that have certain emotions attached to it for you?

• 1:13:15Speaker 01

  I have never thought of the correlation.

• 1:13:21Speaker 01

  Wow. Yeah, I didn't even realize those are the same years. I never thought about it like that.

• 1:13:28Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I think I'm right.

• 1:13:29Speaker 01

  You are, you are. I put my first song out in June of 2021 and she died in October of 2021.

• 1:13:36Speaker 01

  That's crazy. I don't know. I I've never thought about that. I I.

• 1:13:42Speaker 01

  That's cool.

• 1:13:44Speaker 01

  I I don't know how to react to that.

• 1:13:49Speaker 01

  I think it's something that.

• 1:13:52Speaker 01

  I'd have to probably process.

• 1:13:54Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, of course. No, of course. Please. Didn't mean to shock you.

• 1:13:57Speaker 01

  No, no, no. I mean, it's not that.

• 1:13:59Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, I I appreciate.

• 1:14:01Speaker 01

  This revolutionary thing. It's more of it. It's more of like it's it's I. I definitely feel like my. What has now spewed of my music career is something that, you know, has been dealing with those things. And the fact that that happened the same year I pursued music, I feel like it's just another one of those things that have just happened that you kind of have to wonder what the hell is happening in my life.

• 1:14:23Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah, it's. Yeah, it's. Yeah, life is just. There's so many moments like that that are. Yeah, you you can't explain them because you go, how how is it possible?

• 1:14:36Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:14:36Jay Shetty?

  That these two things coincide in a matter of months?

• 1:14:38Speaker 01

  So many, so many things in my life, you know? To the point where it's like, you know, I I'm. Baffled by it every time.

• 1:14:46Jay Shetty?

  So many sliding doors moments in your life, too. I'm almost like. Well, what if you and your mom didn't have that fight where you were pinned and you didn't run away?

• 1:14:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:14:54Jay Shetty?

  And what would happen if? You didn't get shot and become really close to? You know, your friend's dad who? You know, was the officiant of your work like this. And everyone has that. Everyone has those. Yours seem quite, um, there's just, there's just really high tension moments of just. Figuring that out. Talk to me about the wedding with Kovar.

• 1:15:16Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:15:16Jay Shetty?

  How long were you together before you got married?

• 1:15:18Speaker 01

  Five years.

• 1:15:19Jay Shetty?

  Okay.

• 1:15:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:15:20Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:21Speaker 01

  Five years until I proposed, six years until we got married. And.

• 1:15:25Jay Shetty?

  Where did you get married?

• 1:15:25Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:15:26Jay Shetty?

  Where did you get married?

• 1:15:27Speaker 01

  We got married in Temecula.

• 1:15:28Jay Shetty?

  Okay.

• 1:15:28Speaker 01

  Yeah, so I I'm from San Diego.

• 1:15:30Jay Shetty?

  Yes.

• 1:15:31Speaker 01

  So it was something cool. We we got married at a garden.

• 1:15:34Jay Shetty?

  Temecula is beautiful.

• 1:15:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, I I was terrified. The.

• 1:15:37Jay Shetty?

  Of the wedding or Temecula?

• 1:15:39Speaker 01

  The the wedding. Temecula is great place. Um, no, the wedding. I I was. I wanted it to be perfect and it's so. It's so crazy when you have family and everyone, you invite a bunch of people. And I wanted this big wedding because I think that there were so many people that were a huge part of my life, you know, like so many people are the byproducts of who I am today. And so I invited everyone in my life. I think there was 300 people at my wedding. Looking back at that, I probably would have shrunk it a little bit. But yeah, I think everyone just wanted it to be a particular way because they wanted it to be like their wedding. And I think, you know, that rehearsal dinner was terrifying. It was, nothing went to plan. Nothing went to plan at the rehearsal dinner or the rehearsal in general. And the minute the wedding actually happened, it was perfect. It was perfection.

• 1:16:24Speaker 01

  It was, I could not have dreamed of a better wedding. And it was, it was amazing. It was so cool to be able to, I mean, even like my vows, I don't think I'll ever write a piece of work better than those. And

• 1:16:36Jay Shetty?

  You sing?

• 1:16:37Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:16:37Jay Shetty?

  Okay.

• 1:16:38Speaker 01

  I, I didn't want to work on my wedding. And I, with the vows, I also just wanted to make sure that I said everything I wanted to, you know, and I think that's the biggest regret in my life is I never got to say the things I wanted to in the time that I had. And the wedding was something for me where I thought that would be the perfect time to say everything I've ever wanted to, to her. And so I spent, you know, the better half of that night prior, just perfecting those vows. And I remember before I even went out, I read it over again. And I was like, do I want to do a grammar change? What it like? It was so funny. And I, it just, it came from the heart and it was so special.

• 1:17:13Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. That's, that's beautiful. Yeah. I'm a big, I'm a sucker for love and I've officiated a few weddings. And whenever I'm officiating a wedding, my, my voice in my head is, don't cry, don't cry, don't cry. Cause I love love so much that I can just like fully break down. And I'm like tearing over like, you know, the bride walking down the aisle and then looking the husband's, husband to be his eyes and the groom's eyes. And it's just, yeah, it's, it's a magical moment. And vows are probably my favorite part. That's the part where I really have to hold it together. And it's, it's, um, yeah, wedding, weddings are a beautiful thing. I remember I broke down saying my own vows to my wife.

• 1:17:49Speaker 01

  Oh, my God.

• 1:17:50Jay Shetty?

  When I gave my speech and it was just like, God, it's just, you know, she, she was laughing. She was cracking up, which is so in

• 1:17:56Speaker 01

  I love that.

• 1:17:57Jay Shetty?

  indicative of our relationship.

• 1:17:58Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:17:59Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. What are the parts of your, what are the parts of your, I, I find this, and I'm intrigued to hear what you say about this. You said that you learned from your mom who you didn't want to be.

• 1:18:09Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:18:10Jay Shetty?

  What are the parts of your mom that you sometimes see in yourself?

• 1:18:15Jay Shetty?

  When you're dealing with COVID or anyone.

• 1:18:18Speaker 01

  I'm stubborn. I'm really stubborn, man. I mean, ah, that's difficult. I think I spent so much time arguing with my mom that I, I just became so argumentative, you know, and I think that's like my biggest thing and my biggest struggle is I think I just want to win every argument now, you know? Growing up with my mom, my entire relationship with her was trying to prove that she had a problem and trying to spin my words a certain way to articulate to her that she had a problem. You know, if I said it one way, she would tell me that she didn't have a problem and shut it down. So every time I had that, I had to articulate it a different way, try to give her a perspective. Big metaphor guy, because I always tried to correlate to someone who's, I always wondered how someone's brain worked that they couldn't admit that they had a problem or couldn't

• 1:19:03Speaker 01

  understand that if you're getting drunk at 5 a.m. and driving your kids drunk to school, right? So I'd find different ways to try and communicate with that with her. So I always thought it was a communication error and it was never that. And that was my problem is it was never communication error. It was not wanting to admit you had a problem, but you knowing it did. So for me, you know, now that I'm, that's a better half of my entire life, you know, I catch myself arguing with my wife, trying to win, opposed to trying to understand where they're coming from, you know, it's like you hear something and that's the biggest thing is the last two years of my life have been me just trying to put myself in other people's shoes because that's the one thing I carried away from it was whenever

• 1:19:47Speaker 01

  someone would argue with me, I didn't care about how they felt. I cared about winning the argument and I had to take a step back. And I think once I started music especially and just really writing records, it really kind of changed who I am now. And I've been able to really emotionally be present in a lot of things and understand that, you know, How someone feels is important, you know? And I, I know that. And after, I remember after every argument, I'd be like, wow, I'm a piece of shit. I didn't like, I obviously care. I obviously care, but during that moment, it just, it was instinct of just to be combative. And so I remember it would be an hour long conversation just for it to end with, I'm sorry, like that's not.

• 1:20:28Jay Shetty?

  I can relate, I'm with you, I can relate.

• 1:20:30Speaker 01

  You know, and so it's just, that's been definitely one of the things I've carried from my mom. It's just truly like, you know, that relationship where there was just so that, you know?

• 1:20:37Jay Shetty?

  What are the cycles you and Kovu want to break for your kids? I know you said the goal is to become the dad and.

• 1:20:42Speaker 01

  Um, the cycles, I think. Wow, I don't know. I think more about how I'm terrified to be a parent because I don't want to do it wrong. You know, especially with the way I grew up. I grew up without a dad. How am I supposed to understand what that's like if I never had it, you know? And so what I've really thought about is just the fact that I'm, I want to be a girl dad so bad. Like, I don't know what it is. I just think I would thrive with a, with a girl. And um, I think the biggest thing is, you know, the only thing you can do right is love them unconditionally and try your best to, to, to raise them. You know, there is no right way. There is no proper thing. It's just going to be me trying to be the best father I can be.

• 1:21:25Speaker 01

  I think with things that we're trying to break, I'm not sure. I haven't given that much thought. I haven't necessarily thought about what that might look like yet, you know? Which is going to be an interesting conversation or at least interesting thought process when I go into.

• 1:21:39Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, definitely. I'm excited to see what you both come out with. I feel like there's, you have so many great reflections and pinpoints and like almost, you know?

• 1:21:47Speaker 01

  I, I've really bad with not, when she gets pregnant, I don't want to tell anyone. I don't want to post about it. I don't want to, that's been the one thing I really, everything in my life is private or it is not private. Granted, I tell you everything and I, I love that aspect of my life. And I think.

• 1:22:04Speaker 01

  I battle, the one thing I battle with is I'm so insecure now. I'm so, I have the worst imposter syndrome. I care about what everyone thinks about me.

• 1:22:13Jay Shetty?

  Really?

• 1:22:13Speaker 01

  I care so much. If I have a thousand comments and one of them is someone saying I suck, I walk around all day asking people if I suck. Wait, but this person said I sucked. Like, do I actually suck? Like, and wait, was this fine? Was I off here? And like, I, I could never put my kid through that unless they wanted to, but I wouldn't. I don't know if I could ever, do you know, I'd be if I decided to share a photo with my kid and someone's like, that kid's fucking ugly. Are you kidding? I'm not gonna put them through that. I'm gonna put myself through that, knowing my genes.

• 1:22:46Speaker 01

  No, but I don't know. But my wife is like, she loves talking about the things. She loves like, she loves like posting about stuff. So it's definitely been a thing where like, that's been a huge conversation is posting about that. And I don't think, I don't think I will.

• 1:22:59Jay Shetty?

  Has that been the, because you know, when you look at your life and you think you've been through so much hardship?

• 1:23:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:23:04Jay Shetty?

  And it's fascinating that a comment saying you suck still hurts. It just shows us as humans, we're all wired so similarly, like it doesn't matter that you've dealt with way harder things in your life.

• 1:23:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:23:15Jay Shetty?

  Having a thou, having a thou, like having you said, the one out of thousand comment that says you suck, it still hurts because we all don't want to be hated on. Like, has that been the hardest thing about this rise and the music getting so much love? And affection, of course, across the world comes with it naturally proportionately comes, you know, people who don't like it or whatever it may be.

• 1:23:36Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:23:37Jay Shetty?

  Has that been the hardest thing about it?

• 1:23:38Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think so. I think again, like I said, like the music I make is so real to me. It's about my personal life. It's hard not to take it personal. So many people are like, oh, it's art. Don't take it personal. They're judging your art. They're not judging you. And it's, my art is me, you know?

• 1:23:50Jay Shetty?

  When you're writing one more, I love you.

• 1:23:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, like that was, you know, I'm not thinking about the song and how you don't like it. I'm thinking about the fact that there is a 15 year old kid who wrote that in his bedroom, trying to get over loss, you know? And, and that's the hardest part for it. And I also think it's like, you know, I think it's probably my mom's voice. When I look for that comment, I'm looking for my mom in some random way. If I had a therapist, I bet you would say that. But yeah, it's just been like one of those situations in my life, especially I've just really kind of, it's the hardest thing, dude. I am the most insecure motherfucker over me, which most of us are. Most, what I've learned is most people in this industry are the most insecure people, where you think they have it all together and everything's being held together by tape and. Nails.

• 1:24:32Jay Shetty?

  What are you insecure about?

• 1:24:34Speaker 01

  Everything. I am everything. I think that's so easy for me to say all these different things because it's true and I believe it. But at the same time, I look in the mirror and I, I, you know, not even the way I look, I just wish I, these songs are so true. These songs are so real. And I want them to be perfect every time and that's not humanly possible. I want, I want, I've worked so hard and I just want people to think I'm good enough, you know, because like, I, I think that'll convince me I'm good enough. And so when I see comments that, you know, are hateful, I think that's the truth. And I think everyone who's being nice is just gaslighting me, which is a perception thing that I need to work on.

• 1:25:16Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. Do you feel enough today?

• 1:25:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, I had a really good show last night and you know, I like, it's funny, it fluctuates, but like, I don't know, I've been feeling the love recently. I think the hardest part about being nominated for the Grammys and all these different things is it opens people up who do not like you to fully just shit on you. And that's been the one thing I've really had to like.

• 1:25:35Jay Shetty?

  Critics or online?

• 1:25:36Speaker 01

  Everyone. I think like, you know, more now than ever, it's percept, like, I think because I'm a Christian who writes songs about my wife, people think they know who I am, or they assume I'm some thing, you know, whether it's political or what they think that I believe in this. And like, I've seen the most outlandish things said about me on the internet and it's the biggest thing is like, I just don't comment on it. Because like, those people, I'm not going to change their mind, you know? If you think I'm some racist or whatever this thing because you think, because I'm a Christian, I think that's the craziest thing in the world, you know? And my faith is, is, has to do with, you know, with my parents passing away and who I

• 1:26:17Speaker 01

  am today, you know? And it's just been, it's been such a struggle to kind of watch people say things about me that is not true, you know? And all of a sudden, I just have to be okay with it and not say anything because that's the right play, you know, you, you, you fight for yourself. These, these people aren't going to believe you, you know, they're just gonna be like, oh, you're just saying that because you sold your soul. And it's like, what? What?

• 1:26:40Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I I I came up with a rule a few years ago that really helped me process stuff. I was like, the closer you get to the top one percent or whatever industry you're in,

• 1:26:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:26:49Jay Shetty?

  the more likely it is that fifty percent of people disagree with you.

• 1:26:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:26:53Jay Shetty?

  And and that math helped it make sense because I remember when my comment section was just like the nicest place on earth.

• 1:27:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:27:00Jay Shetty?

  Like when it was cute and cozy and everything else. And then you just realize you're like, okay, scale means disagreement. It means disconnection. It means debate, whatever it means. And and you realize that it's not a reflection of you, me, or anyone else. It's it's normally just a reflection of too many opinions.

• 1:27:19Speaker 01

  Hmm.

• 1:27:19Jay Shetty?

  And and just that. And and one thing that's really helped me a lot is recognizing that hate is loud and love is usually soft and quiet.

• 1:27:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:27:27Jay Shetty?

  And that hate is so aggressive and direct, but love is so indirect and subtle in how we share it.

• 1:27:36Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:27:36Jay Shetty?

  And I've tried really hard over the last couple of years to take. So before I used to be indifferent to both. And what's really helped me recently is to be as gracious in receiving love.

• 1:27:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:27:52Jay Shetty?

  As I was serious about reading hate.

• 1:27:55Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 1:27:56Jay Shetty?

  So when I used to read the hateful comments, you read them and you take them seriously. I get that feeling. Like you read one bad comment, you're like, I must suck. And you're checking with everyone. So you're taking it so seriously. So if I'm going to take it that seriously, I need to take the love as graciously as I took that. And so now if someone says to me, Jay, I listened to this episode with, which I'm sure people with with Alex and like, I couldn't believe Alex was, you know. It's like I would try and take that in far more graciously and presently than I ever would.

• 1:28:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:28:23Jay Shetty?

  Because I recognize that I have to rewire my brain, not to only listen to the good stuff or only think positive. That's not the goal. But to truly let my heart and soul feel the impact because I definitely let my heart and soul feel the impact of someone, you know, trying to hurt me.

• 1:28:38Speaker 01

  A hundred and ten percent. It's it's such a strange thing to like. I think that was the one part that was really hard for me to turn off was the fact that I wanted to defend myself every second, you know? I see so many things about me on the internet that are not true. And everyone just assumes these things because of who I am or how I'm perceived on the internet. And so it's just like a weird thing of just like, you want to bet so badly be like, no, no, I'm not like that. Look like I'm this and it's like, it doesn't matter. Like people are gonna believe whatever the hell they want to believe anyway. But that's the hardest thing is shutting the up.

• 1:29:06Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah, I remember once I said, I wish I could sit down one on one with every single person.

• 1:29:12Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:29:13Jay Shetty?

  Who doesn't understand me. If I could just hold their hands for a moment and look in their eyes and explain my intention and what I was going through and what I was struggling, you know, whatever it may be. And I know I can't do that physically. So, you know.

• 1:29:25Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 1:29:26Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, but I get, yeah.

• 1:29:27Speaker 01

  I hope one day, I hope one day that some people just realize my intentions. My intention is just to make music that can help people. Everything past that, it doesn't matter. Like, I think that's the problem is like, everyone looks at these things so much and they view it as arbitrary. And they just want to hate on things that they may not like. And I think if you give everything a chance, like I, there's so much music that I may not like, love, right? But I respect the fact that they're trying. I think that's the biggest thing in life right now. It's like, there's so many popular musicians right now where their fandoms are like, oh, Galaxy because this, this, this. And it's like, dude, do you not realize all of us are friends behind the scene? All of us are rooting each other on.

• 1:30:05Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:06Speaker 01

  You know, and like, that's the one thing is like, I feel like you're, it's just such a strange, and obviously it's the job. It's so the job, but come coming from being a fan to then doing it.

• 1:30:14Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:15Speaker 01

  It's the craziest thing. It's the craziest thing being in it and like, understanding it and and and being like, wow, like, I understand why people don't say anything. It sucks that you can't, you know?

• 1:30:27Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. And it and it's so hard because we're also living in a time where I think everyone's like, let's be sensitive about each other's mental health. And let's really be thoughtful about how we make people feel. And then, and then over nothing, like just over, almost like a, it's almost like a treating music and art like a sports team.

• 1:30:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:30:43Jay Shetty?

  But, um, Alex, it's been such a joy talking to you and I've truly hoped this at the beginning of um, getting to know you better and getting to know you more. I've I've loved every moment of your openness, your vulnerability, and I, I really appreciate just how.

• 1:31:01Jay Shetty?

  Truly transparent you're willing to be in order to help people and help people understand your music better. And I think that's why your music has resonated so strongly and deeply with me and, you know, billions of people around the world. Because I believe that everything you shared today is exactly what we're hearing and feeling in your music. And I felt this as deeply as we do the chords and the singing and all the work that comes through with you. So thank you so much.

• 1:31:26Speaker 01

  Thank you. I don't feel like you realize how much I needed this, obviously. This was really, really important for me.

• 1:31:32Jay Shetty?

  Well, that means a lot to me. We end every episode of On Purpose with a final five. These questions have to be answered in one sentence each.

• 1:31:39Speaker 01

  Cool.

• 1:31:40Jay Shetty?

  So Alex Warren, these are your final five.

• 1:31:42Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:31:43Jay Shetty?

  The first question is, and we ask this to every guest, the first question is, what is the best advice you've ever heard or received?

• 1:31:49Speaker 01

  I've actually never received any advice I think I've used, but I would say the best advice would be, um, wait, I forgot, this is one sentence.

• 1:31:57Jay Shetty?

  No, no, that's fine. That's fine. You can do that. I'm gonna let you do that anyway.

• 1:32:00Speaker 01

  Everything happens for a reason. Everything happens for a reason. You, whatever happens in your life, run with it.

• 1:32:08Jay Shetty?

  Okay. Uh, second question, what is the worst advice you've ever heard or received?

• 1:32:13Speaker 01

  Give up.

• 1:32:14Jay Shetty?

  Who said that to you?

• 1:32:15Speaker 01

  My mom.

• 1:32:16Jay Shetty?

  How many times?

• 1:32:17Speaker 01

  Too many. To the point where I stopped believing it. So that was definitely the thing. And I think it fueled me to even keep going more.

• 1:32:24Jay Shetty?

  So sometimes it's great when someone repeats bad advice because you get desensitized from it. Is what I'm taking away from your, your brain and how it works. I want to scan your brain one day.

• 1:32:33Speaker 01

  Me too.

• 1:32:33Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, we should do that. Yeah, I would love to do that. We.

• 1:32:36Speaker 01

  All the colors?

• 1:32:36Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah. I have a lot of neuro senses on the show, so we'll have to, we'll have to.

• 1:32:39Speaker 01

  Love that.

• 1:32:40Jay Shetty?

  We'd have to figure that out. That'd be really special to do. That's, we'll arrange that. Uh, question number three, I'd love for you to leave a video for your kids here on the podcast.

• 1:32:50Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:32:50Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, that would make my day.

• 1:32:52Speaker 01

  All right, cool. Which camera do I look in?

• 1:32:53Jay Shetty?

  Uh, that one, yeah.

• 1:32:54Speaker 01

  All right. Hey, kids, it's your dad. Um, I'm sitting here right now with, uh, probably your uncle at this point, or I don't know, he's around a lot and I don't know if he's eating out of our fridge or what he's doing, but I just want you to know that I love you so much. And I pretty much talked about you this entire podcast. And, um, if you want to learn more about me and, uh, watch it.

• 1:33:16Jay Shetty?

  I love that. That's beautiful. Thank you.

• 1:33:17Speaker 01

  Thank you for letting me do that. That's cool.

• 1:33:19Jay Shetty?

  It's so cool. I just love it. I love.

• 1:33:21Speaker 01

  I do that all the time.

• 1:33:22Jay Shetty?

  I love that you do it all the time. You're inspiring me to want to do it. Like, I'm gonna start doing it because of you.

• 1:33:26Speaker 01

  It's the best, and I got it from my dad, and I think it's the most special thing, especially when they're born. I'm gonna have a camera everywhere. So they know that, like, so they just have that moment.

• 1:33:35Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. You're so young, but did you watch that show, How I Met Your Mother?

• 1:33:38Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:33:38Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, it's like that to me is just, you know, I love that show and I never thought of it. So you inspired it. I love it. Uh, question number four. Uh, if you could talk to your father today, what would you say to him?

• 1:33:54Speaker 01

  Am I everything you wanted me to be?

• 1:33:59Speaker 01

  I care more about what my dad thinks than anything. So as I live life, and I think you asked me this so many times today, and I didn't have an answer, and as I'm saying this, I think I know it, is you ask why I have this outlook on life and how I do based on the things I've gone through. I think it's really easy to when you have um, a person or you believe someone's looking down at you. And I like to think that my dad's proud of me. And so that's the thing is, you know, everything I do, I try to be moral and I try to do the right thing because I truly believe that my dad is, uh, watching.

• 1:34:36Jay Shetty?

  I hope one day we get to see those videos in some capacity.

• 1:34:41Speaker 01

  I would show you anytime.

• 1:34:42Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, that's, I can't, if he was able to infuse that much morality, love, kindness, empathy.

• 1:34:48Speaker 01

  You'd love them. I know just after this conversation, you would love those videos.

• 1:34:52Jay Shetty?

  Really special. Yeah, genuinely so powerful. Uh, fifth and final question. We ask this to every guest who's ever been on the show. Alex, if you could create one law that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it be?

• 1:35:03Speaker 01

  Be nice to your neighbor. Treat your neighbor the way you want to be treated. I think that's one we've lost so much is everyone now more than ever needs it. Where we are today, there's so much hate and there's so much judgment. And that's now more than ever, I just think that everyone needs to be treated the way that they would like to be treated.

• 1:35:23Jay Shetty?

  Alex Warren, I'm so excited to see you at the Grammys.

• 1:35:26Speaker 01

  I'm excited to see you.

• 1:35:26Jay Shetty?

  I'm gonna be there. I'm, uh, really looking forward to seeing you, you know, hopefully win, putting it out there, manifesting right now. Uh, it'd be wonderful to be there and see you get that award that you so deeply deserve and.

• 1:35:39Speaker 01

  I can't wait to watch Leon Thomas win it.

• 1:35:45Speaker 01

  I appreciate you. Thank you so much.

• 1:35:46Jay Shetty?

  I mean it, I mean it. Alex, such a pleasure, truly.

• 1:35:49Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 1:35:49Jay Shetty?

  Thank you. You're awesome, man.

• 1:35:51Speaker 01

  Dude.

• 1:35:51Jay Shetty?

  Such a great guy.

• 1:35:52Speaker 01

  That was so needed.

• 1:35:53Jay Shetty?

  If you love this episode, you'll really enjoy my episode with Selena Gomez on befriending your inner critic and how to speak to yourself with more compassion.

• 1:36:04Speaker 03

  My fears are only going to continue to show me what I'm capable of. The more that I face my fears, the more that I feel I'm gaining strength and gaining wisdom. And I just want to keep doing that.