This 3 Step Equation Will Solve All Your Problems

In this new age of self-care, we so often claim anything that we do when we are stressed as self-care. But are we truly giving ourselves the self-care we need? Or are we just being self-indulgent? In this week’s episode, I break down the difference between self-care and self-indulgence and share a 3 part equation that will help you solve all of your problems. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by AG1. Are you feeling September reset too? Shorter days, longer to-do lists, earlier alarms, all those routines you promised yourself you'd pick back up. It can feel like your whole life is recalibrating. And when everything around you is changing, it helps to have a few things you can rely on. AG1 Next Gen is one of those easy habits to keep. It's the clinically-backed, comprehensive daily health drink that supports your gut health, energy production, and foundational nutrition all in one scoop. AG1's ingredients are sourced from quality partners for absorption, potency, and nutrient density to deliver the foundational nutrition your body needs. And alongside a proper diet,

• 0:44Jay Shetty?

  AG1 Next Gen meets 94% of nutrient requirements and it's clinically shown to enrich the gut microbiome. For a limited time, save 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro at drinkag1.com/onpurpose. That's drinkag1.com/onpurpose. This episode is brought to you by Vinted. Value can be found anywhere, even in the clothes sitting untouched in our closets. That's where Vinted comes in. Vinted is a secondhand marketplace app where you can sell clothes you no longer want and get more value out of them. Whether you're running out of space, moving, or simply updating your wardrobe. Listing items is a quick and simple process, and once something sells,

• 1:30Jay Shetty?

  Vinted creates a prepaid shipping label for you. And the best part, there are no seller fees, so you keep what you earn. It's a simple way to clear out your closet, be less wasteful, and maybe make some extra money along the way. And if you've been thinking about a wardrobe refresh, this can make it feel a little more worthwhile. You're not just letting go of clothes, you're getting more value from what you already have. Give your clothes a second life with Vinted. Download the Vinted app for free to start selling with no seller fees, so you keep every dollar you earn. This episode is brought to you by AG1. Are you feeling September reset too? Shorter days, longer to-do lists, earlier alarms, all those routines you promised yourself you'd pick back up. It can feel like your whole life is recalibrating.

• 2:16Jay Shetty?

  And when everything around you is changing, it helps to have a few things you can rely on. AG1 Next Gen is one of those easy habits to keep. It's the clinically backed, comprehensive daily health drink that supports your gut health, energy production, and foundational nutrition all in one scoop. AG1's ingredients are sourced from quality partners for absorption, potency, and nutrient density to deliver the foundational nutrition your body needs. And alongside a proper diet, AG1 Next Gen meets 94% of nutrient requirements and is clinically shown to enrich the gut microbiome. For a limited time, save 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1

• 2:59Jay Shetty?

  Pro at drinkag1.com/onpurpose. That's drinkag1.com/onpurpose. When our knowledge increases, our problems shrink. When our knowledge stays the same or decreases, our problems continue to get bigger and bigger and bigger.

• 3:26Jay Shetty?

  Welcome back to On Purpose, the number one place for life wisdom on self, work, and love. If you want to be better, do better, and give more, you're in exactly the right place. Thank you so much for everyone who's subscribed, rated, and reviewed. I'd love for you to do it if you haven't already. The reviews really matter. I look through them, they're so meaningful to me. Thank you so much for leaving your comments. Today's episode theme is this three-step equation that will solve all your problems. And I know what you're thinking, you want to know right now what this equation is, because we all have problems.

• 4:07Jay Shetty?

  It's so normal in our day-to-day lives, whether our problem is the fact that we have something going on at work, whether our problem is the fact that we have something at home, whether your problem is you're trying to record a podcast and someone keeps haunting outside in New York, whichever one it is, we all experience problems and none of us can avoid them. So how do we solve them? How do we deal with them? How do we work? Through them. Norman Vincent Peale once said, problems are to the mind what exercise is to the muscles. They toughen and make you strong. That's fascinating to think about because when we exercise and we're pushing the muscles, they strengthen. Same with problems.

• 4:51Jay Shetty?

  When we have that resistance in our life, when we work through it, break through it, we also become stronger. Now that is true when we solve them. So this is usually the equation we use to solve problems. Think about it like this. You've had a long, hard week at work. Plus, addition, your dog's been unwell. Plus, you have a friend's birthday this weekend. Equals, you feel you need to let loose this weekend. How many of you experienced that? Or, you've been arguing with your partner all week. Plus, your dog's been unwell. Plus, you're having money issues. Equals, you feel you need a bottle of wine and maybe another one.

• 5:35Jay Shetty?

  How many of you have been in that situation before? Or, you didn't get that promotion. Plus, your dog's been unwell. Plus, your Uber is taking forever to get to you. Equals, binge watch shows all weekend with a tub of ice cream. Now, if you can relate to any of those scenarios, any of those situations, any of those experiences, trust me, you're not alone. In the past, I've been in some of those myself and I know a lot of people who turn to that equals, those options, whether it's letting loose this weekend, whether it's a bottle of wine and maybe another one, whether it's a tub of ice cream and binge watching shows. And now, look, there's nothing wrong with a little indulgence.

• 6:20Jay Shetty?

  And there's nothing wrong with a tub of chocolate, fudge, brownie, ice cream. You can tell I've been thinking about this. But when it comes to solving our problems, we need to create a method that benefits us in the long term. There's a fine line between self-care and self-indulgence. We There's so much about self-care these days and usually it's like getting a massage, taking a bath, or you know smelling essential oils or whatever it may be. But self-indulgence makes you feel good in the moment, but it doesn't create any long-lasting benefits. Whereas true self-care creates lasting change,

• 7:04Jay Shetty?

  so you don't need to feel that way ever again, or at least for a long time. How good would that be? How good would it be that the way we use our time and our lives means that we don't have to keep learning the same lesson again? Means we don't have to keep experiencing the same emotion again and again and again, which means we don't have to deal with the same pain again and again and again. How many times in life are you facing learning the same lesson? How many times in life are you experiencing the same emotions? The negative ones that you don't want? And how many times are you experiencing the same pain, week on week on week? Why are Sunday or Monday blues a real thing, week after week after week?

• 7:49Jay Shetty?

  It's all because we have not created an equation, a method, approach to solving our problems. We are simply avoiding our problems. We are simply maneuvering around our problems. We're simply finding equations and methods to never have to deal with them. We have to create an equation that doesn't keep repeating itself. Listen carefully. The equation to solve all your problems has three parts. Here's what they are. Problems, number one. We all know what those are. These could be financial, physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual.

• 8:32Jay Shetty?

  It could be career-related, it could be our relationships, it could be money, or it could just be a general dissatisfaction, but we all have problems. Part two of the equation is time. We all have the same 24 hours in a day. This doesn't change for any of us. It doesn't matter how beautiful you are, how strong you are, how much money you have, how many followers you have. You cannot change the amount of time we get in a day.

• 9:03Jay Shetty?

  What we can change and what people do change is what we do with our time makes all the difference. We have a choice. We can either be consumed by time or use our time to deal with our problems. We can either be consumed by time and avoid our problems, or we can either use time to deal with our problems. And the third part of the equation is knowledge. We all have a certain level of skills, insights and information. And a lot of us are dealing with our challenges with the same level of information, insight and skills that we've always had. Actually, a lot of us stopped studying, learning or growing after we finished school.

• 9:48Jay Shetty?

  And most of us know that that wasn't enough anyway. When our knowledge increases, our problems shrink. When our knowledge stays the same or decreases, our problems continue to get bigger and bigger and bigger. One of my favorite examples of this, and currently I'm in New York City, I'm visiting here and I'm recording podcasts. And I've been walking around the streets. And when you're walking around the streets and you look up, all the buildings look big. Actually, it's so difficult to even figure out which building is bigger than the other. Every building looks absolutely huge. You look up and you just see these buildings towering over you.

• 10:29Jay Shetty?

  When we're in the midst of our problems, when we're in the middle of our problems, when we look up at them, they're like these buildings. All of our problems look colossal, all of our problems look huge, all of our problems look like we'll never be able to overcome them. How many times have you been in that situation where you look up at your problems and you just drown? You just feel completely overwhelmed and burdened by the weight of those problems?

• 10:57Jay Shetty?

  But think about it this way, if you're higher, maybe you're in a helicopter, maybe you're in a plane, or what I've had experience of in New York is being in a higher building. When you're in a higher building, you can actually start to see each building for what it's worth. You can see it, how big it is, how big it is in comparison to another building. You start seeing things with perspective. When you get to a higher plane, you see things with perspective. This is the same with knowledge. When our knowledge increases, when we get higher in our knowledge, we're able to see our problems with perspective. When we're lower in our knowledge and in our problems, we think everything is the same. We think everything is towering over us.

• 11:39Jay Shetty?

  I hope this analogy makes sense and helps you realize the value of elevating your knowledge, elevating your insights and elevating your skills. If your knowledge grows, so do you. So, according to our default equation, the one that we all share, it goes like this. We've had a long week at work, plus our dog's been unwell, plus we have a friend's birthday this weekend, equals you need to let loose this weekend. When we do that, our problems stay the same. Our time to deal with the problem decreases and our knowledge to deal with the problem stays the same or decreases. So, if the antidote to your problems is letting loose this weekend,

• 12:24Jay Shetty?

  if the antidote to your problems is getting a bottle of wine, if your antidote to your problems is avoiding them through any of these methods that we do, which I refer to as self-indulgence, what happens is our problems stay the same, our time to deal with the problem decreases because we used our time to do whatever it was, and our knowledge to deal with the problem stays the same or decreases. It means when we come back to our problem, we have no more ammunition, no more of a toolkit, no more balance or centeredness or insight to deal with what's in front of us.

• 12:59Jay Shetty?

  It's like turning up to a boxing match with no training, right? Imagine an athlete preparing for their biggest fight of their life, or the biggest game of their life. But instead of training, all they did was take a break and do nothing. Imagine how much stress and pressure they feel in the moment. Imagine to relieve that stress and pressure, they just avoided training. They avoided focusing on growth. How much pressure, anxiety and stress would you feel in that moment? This self-indulgent approach consumes our time, our mental focus, our energy, our finances and our health to a great degree.

• 13:41Jay Shetty?

  Real self-care is not meant to be an escape from our lives. Self-care is when we use our time and knowledge to create a life we don't want to escape from. Listen to that again. Self-care is when we use our time and knowledge to create a life we don't want to escape from. Self-indulgence is to escape from our lives. Self-care is to create a life we don't want an escape from.

• 14:10Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by Indeed. I know how important every hire is for a business. If you need to make the right hire, this is a job for sponsored jobs. Indeed sponsored jobs helps find quality candidates when you need the most. You can reach who you need based on whatever criteria you're looking for, like skills, certifications or location. In fact, people are finding quality hires on Indeed right now. In the minute I've been talking to you, companies like yours made 27 hires on Indeed, according to Indeed data worldwide. Spend less time searching and more time actually interviewing candidates who check all your boxes. Listeners of this show will get a $75 sponsored job credit at indeed.com/podcast.

• 14:53Jay Shetty?

  That's indeed.com/podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs. This episode is brought to you by Wayfair. Home should be a place that feels like a sanctuary, a space that truly reflects who you are. But it can be challenging to balance style, budget and endless options. I was looking to create a dedicated calm space for my morning meditation and reading, but I was struggling to find pieces that felt grounding but could also stand up to daily use. I went on Wayfair and found a beautiful, solid wood accent chair and a bookshelf. Now that corner is my favourite place to anchor my day. The quality is incredible, it's built to last and it completely shifted the energy of the room.

• 15:35Jay Shetty?

  Plus, you can shop with Wayfair Verified, where product specialists carefully vet items for quality and functionality, so you can shop with more confidence. And if putting it all together sounds like a headache, Wayfair can handle delivery, installation and assembly. Join Wayfair Rewards today to get 5% back on every purchase and start saving on your next home upgrade. Head to wayfair.com to shop all things home. That's W A Y F A I R dot com. Wayfair, every style, every home. This episode is brought to you by Whole Foods Market. If you're talking about quality food, you can't forget Whole Foods Market, who've been holding themselves to the highest standards since they opened in 1980.

• 16:19Jay Shetty?

  That means you'll see thousands of organic products across their stores, from the produce department to the aisles. It also means you'll never see certain ingredients. They've banned artificial sweeteners and colours, high fructose corn syrup and more, so you can shop with peace of mind. Shop Whole Foods Market in-store or online. Now, the classic things that are mentioned before, the self-indulgence, include finishing a bottle of wine, solo daily sometimes, eating sweets every single day, spending all day on the couch every weekend. Again, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with self-indulgence a little. It's when it becomes our norm that it starts to become dangerous.

• 17:02Jay Shetty?

  In our equation, we should always be using our time to increase our knowledge, knowledge of ourselves, knowledge of how to deal with issues, just like you're doing right now. And this podcast really is just to congratulate you and really own what you're doing right now. You could be doing something totally meaningless right now, but you're choosing to listen to this podcast and focus on your growth, which means when you go back to your life... Your time will have definitely go down, but that happens either way. But your knowledge will have gone up because you used your time wisely. And so your problems will start to decrease when you apply that knowledge. This is the equation of our lives.

• 17:44Jay Shetty?

  When we invest our time wisely, our knowledge goes up and our problems go down. When we waste our time badly, our time goes down. Our knowledge stays the same or goes down and our problems go up. Benjamin Franklin once wisely said, "An investment in knowledge pays the best interest." Or as billionaire entrepreneur, investor and philanthropist Paul Tudor Jones said, "Intellectual capital will always trump financial capital." So the message here is very simple. What we do with our time to gain knowledge changes everything. And there are three ways of acquiring knowledge. And they're very different.

• 18:29Jay Shetty?

  Usually when we think of knowledge, we only think of it as learning. That is one of the three. Learning, whether that's reading, whether that's listening to podcasts, whether it's audiobooks, whether it's learning from a mentor or a coach. So learning is one of the three. The second one is reflecting. Reflection is actually a beautiful way of gaining knowledge, especially when you need some downtime. See, we might not always feel mentally active. Our brain might be tired of consuming facts and thoughts and ideas. And hence, reflection can be a beautiful way of acquiring knowledge. Reflecting on ourselves, our actions, reflecting on so many different things. And thirdly, a way of gaining knowledge is experimenting.

• 19:14Jay Shetty?

  Again, we usually think of gaining knowledge as just learning, sitting there, reading, consuming, but experimenting, acting, taking action, learning how to apply and testing. This can be a great way of gaining knowledge. So I want to talk a bit about the reflection one and how that helps us gain knowledge. Each morning Benjamin Franklin would ask himself, "What good shall I do this day?" And in the evening, he would say, "What good have I done today?" This is a really powerful way of reflecting and identifying what's important to us, identifying what's a priority to us, reminding ourselves consistently what's important to us.

• 19:55Jay Shetty?

  We all know the story of Steve Jobs and how he would stand in front of a mirror and ask himself, if today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I'm about to do now? And what I would say to add to that, if we can't ask ourselves that question is, how can I do what I'm going to do today in a way that makes me happy? How can I add happiness, meaning, purpose and passion to anything and everything that I have to do today? And everyone from Ariana Huffington to Oprah Winfrey do exactly the same, starting each day with their gratitude journal, noting five things for which they're genuinely thankful for. So these are just small moments. It may take five minutes to do this activity every day.

• 20:39Jay Shetty?

  It may take two minutes when we're doing our hair in the mirror or when we're getting ready for work, or whatever it is. We can either fill that time up with Instagram, a song, or reading about a sporting event from the night before, or we can do these simple reflections that improve our self-awareness, that allow us to come back to our problems with more perspective. One of the best ways to do that is go to bed with gratitude and wake up with powerful intentions. At night, you may not want to ask too many questions to feel overactivated, so create a peaceful environment to sleep, and in the morning you can set your focuses. One of the other things that a lot of people do while reflecting is that they go for walks.

• 21:23Jay Shetty?

  Top performers build exercise into their daily routine, and one of the most common ones and easiest ones for all of us is walking. Charles Darwin went on two walks daily, one at noon and one at 4:00 PM after a midday meal. Beethoven used to go on long walks and carried a pencil and sheets of music paper to think about thoughts he had on music and come up with things spontaneously. We can replace a trip to the bar with a night of staying in to research, conferences in our industry, learn how to write, learn how to grow, practise something else, do an online course, learn about our passion, apply all of these things. It's all about how we use our time to gain knowledge and learning.

• 22:07Jay Shetty?

  We all know how important learning is. And during his five-year study of more than 200 self-made millionaires, Thomas Corley found that they don't watch TV. Instead, an impressive 86% claimed they read, but not just for fun. 63% indicated they listen to audiobooks during their morning commute, and most of this content is self-development, personal growth, learning of skills. And today, if you're not an avid reader, we have TED Talks, we have YouTube, we have the Blinkist app, especially whilst cooking, while cleaning. We have so many moments while we're commuting. Even if you say you don't have time, we all commute to work. We all wash dishes, we all do the laundry, we all clean our homes.

• 22:50Jay Shetty?

  And during that time, we can knowledge up. And when we knowledge up, we're gaining more insights to deal with our problem. This is the difference. Self-indulgence makes us feel better and time passes, but our stress, pressure and anxiety continues to grow.

• 23:13Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by State Farm. We talk a lot about intentional decision-making, and that extends to the practical stuff too, like making sure your coverage actually works for your life. State Farm is there to meet you where you are, and they know how sweet it is to feel good about your decisions. Talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can choose to bundle and save with a personal price plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state.

• 23:47Speaker 01

  Mr. President, my company foreme of the explosion on our rig.

• 23:50Speaker 02

  On October 2nd.

• 23:51Speaker 01

  Causing massive water displacement and triggering a tsunami. They all heap the blame on me.

• 23:56Speaker 02

  Tom Cruise is. Digger got us into this mess, and Digger's gonna dig us up. From the director of Birdman and The Revenant.

• 24:04Speaker 03

  What would happen if I stopped going? You start, you freeze to death, that's what.

• 24:08Speaker 02

  With great power comes great deniability.

• 24:11Speaker 03

  I'm not the first then.

• 24:12Speaker 02

  Digger. See the trailer online. Only in theaters October 2nd. Rated R. Under 17. Not a minute without terror.

• 24:17Speaker 04

  Espolone Tequila. Balanced. Delicious. 100% acave. 0% ego. Just add ice, lime, and your mouth. For a real margarita, ride the rooster.

• 24:27Speaker 02

  Espolone Tequila, 40% alcohol by volume, 80 proof. Copyright 2026, Campari America, New York, New York. Drink responsibly.

• 24:33Jay Shetty?

  So, here's six steps to applying this principle. The first thing when you're dealing with a problem, because the biggest problem with a problem, and our problems, is that we don't accept they're a problem. The first thing we have to do when dealing with a problem is ask ourselves, is this a real problem? And a good way of judging whether it's a real problem is how impactful will it be in five days, five weeks, and five years? When we ask ourselves the 5-5-5 rule, it helps us really put things into perspective, and I would recommend you do that exercise. When you ask yourself, is this a problem? Ask yourself, is this a problem that's going to affect me for five days? Five weeks?

• 25:18Jay Shetty?

  Five months? Or five years? And circle which five it is. So ask yourself, is this a problem? And write down 5-5-5-5. One is five days, one is five weeks, one is five months, one is five years. Ask yourself what type of problem this is. The second thing, the second A, accept. Accept this is a problem. Don't try and think of all the things you could have do to avoided it. So often when we think about our problems, we're like, oh, if I did this, I wouldn't be in this situation. Oh my God, if I just changed this, then this wouldn't have happened. And we waste all of that energy. Once you've accepted it's a problem. And know whether it's affecting you for five days, five weeks, five months or five

• 25:58Jay Shetty?

  years, we can start doing the third A, which is attaining knowledge through all the methods I just talked about. Research, mentors, reading, listening, coaching, courses, all of these ways, we can start attaining knowledge for what we really need. And one of the biggest mistakes we make in this is that we don't find people that can help us with our actual solution to problems. We find people who can listen to us. That may be part of it, but it's so important that we share it with people who can actually help us. The fourth A is attention split. Our attention has to be 80% on solution-oriented conversations and direction and 20% on venting how we feel and sharing how we feel.

• 26:43Jay Shetty?

  Remember this principle, the 80/20 rule of your attention when dealing with the problems. We usually do it the other way around. We're usually complaining for 80% of the time and trying to solve our problems 20% of the time. And guess what you get? You get 80% of problems in your life. You get what you create. If you don't try and solve your problems 80% of the time, you will have 80% of problems when you're just complaining 80% of the time. Fifth A, action that into small steps. Use that 80% to action all of it into small steps. And six, make amendments. Amend things so you don't have to go through them again and again and again. Most of our problems in life are recurring.

• 27:26Jay Shetty?

  Most of us are dealing with the same problems over and over again, whether it's the same boss at work, whether it's the same relationship, domestic issue, whatever it is, we're doing the same thing over and over again because we don't amend. So this is the six As of solving your problems. Number one, ask yourself, is this a problem? And identify, is it five days, five weeks, five months or five years? Put it into perspective. Number two, accept it's a problem. Stop thinking of how you could have avoided it or couldn't be there. You are there. Number three, attain knowledge, research, mentors, reading, listening. Number four, attention split, 80% on solutions, 20% sharing your issues. Fifth, action that into small, actionable breakdown steps.

• 28:11Jay Shetty?

  Six, amend so that it doesn't repeat.

• 28:15Jay Shetty?

  Knowledge means awareness of what you need in life. Often, you do need a mental break or an emotional break. Often, you may be too tired to read and learn. But what really happens when you start choosing education over entertainment, when you start choosing self-care over self-indulgence, is that it fuels you. It fuels you. Self-care is difficult in the short term, but fulfilling in the long term. Self-indulgence is pleasurable in the short term, but terrible in the long term. We've all experienced it. It's about time we change the equation of our life. Let's start living for the long term.

• 28:58Jay Shetty?

  That instant win, that instant gratification, is not going to solve our problems. And we know we're escaping when we come back to our problems with the same lack of energy, the same lack of enthusiasm, and lack of insight to deal with them. But if you're coming back to your problems with motivation, insight, energy, then you're taking care of yourself. That's a great way to test it. How are you feeling when you're coming back to your life? When you take a break, when you try a new thing, are you coming back to your life with a renewed sense of enthusiasm to deal with your challenges, a renewed sense of confidence and conviction to deal with your challenges? Or are you coming back with less, less, and less? I really want you to think about this equation.

• 29:43Jay Shetty?

  Remember this very carefully. When you use your time wisely, your knowledge goes up. Your time, of course, goes down, but your problems go down. When you use your time badly, your time goes down, your knowledge goes down, and your problems go up. It's as simple as that. Thank you so much for listening to this week's episode on purpose. I'm so grateful that you keep coming back every single week. This is transformative wisdom that is changing your life, self, work, and love. Remember, I want you to be someone that you love. I want you to do what you love, and I want you to live with the person you love and create a life you love. And we do that right here, the number one place for life wisdom. Thank you for being a part of this community of conscious change makers.

• 30:28Jay Shetty?

  Thank you for making a change in your own life and in the lives of others. And remember that when you create the mind, life and space you need, you're going to be a contagious force in the world. Thank you for listening. Make sure you rate, review and subscribe. I can't wait for you to hear next week's episode. See you then.

• 30:53Jay Shetty?

  Thank you so much for listening through to the end of that episode. I hope you're going to share this all across social media. Let people know that you're subscribed to On Purpose. Let me know. Post it. Tell me what a difference it's making in your life. I would love to see your thoughts. I can't wait for this incredibly conscious community we're creating of purposeful people. You're now a part of the tribe, a part of the squad. Thank you for being here. I can't wait to share the next episode with you.

• 32:37Speaker 04

  Espolone Tequila. Balanced, delicious. 100% acave, 0% ego. Just add ice, lime and your mouth. For a real margarita, ride the rooster.

• 32:47Speaker 05

  Espolone Tequila, 40% alcohol by volume, 80 proof. Copyright 2026, Compendia America, New York, New York. Drink responsibly.