Ixta Belfrage

Award-winning cook and food writer Ixta Belfrage – author of ‘Mezcla’ and new book ‘FUSÃO’ – is this week’s Dream Restaurant guest. Did someone mention Prawn Lasagne? Ixta Belfrage’s new book ‘FUSÃO’ is out now - buy it here https://www.waterstones.com/book/fus-o/ixta-belfrage/9781529932829. Her previous book ‘Mezcla’ is available here https://www.waterstones.com/book/mezcla/ixta-belfrage/9781529148091. Follow Ixta on Instagram @ixta.belfrage https://www.instagram.com/ixta.belfrage/ Watch the video version of this episode on the Off Menu YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@offmenupodcast on Thu 26 Mar. Off Menu is now on YouTube: @offmenupodcast https://www.youtube.com/@offmenupodcast Follow Off Menu on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/offmenuofficial and TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@offmenuofficial: @offmenuofficial. And go to our website www.offmenupodcast.co.uk https://www.offmenupodcast.co.uk/ for a list of restaurants recommended on the show. Off Menu is a comedy podcast hosted by Ed Gamble and James Acaster. Produced, recorded and edited by Ben Williams for Plosive https://www.plosive.co.uk/. Video production by Ben Williams and Megan McCarthy for Plosive https://www.plosive.co.uk/. Artwork by Paul Gilbey https://www.instagram.com/pushgilbey/ (photography and design). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy https://acast.com/privacy for more information.

• 0:13Speaker 00

  Welcome to the Off Menu podcast, taking the thin Melba toast of conversation, spreading on the chicken liver pate of humour. And what else have you put on that? Like a sort of sweet chutney maybe? Do you like a bit of chutney with that, James?

• 0:29Speaker 01

  That is a gamble. My name is

• 0:30Speaker 00

  Fink Jam?

• 0:31Speaker 01

  My name is James Acaster. Together we own a dream restaurant. And every single week we're inviting a guest and we're asking their favourite ever start. A main course, dessert, cider champagne drink, not in that order. And this week, our guest is?

• 0:43Speaker 00

  Easter Belfrage. Easter Belfrage is a wonderful chef, James. Creates incredible cookbooks and of course, created one of your favourite dishes.

• 0:52Speaker 01

  My god.

• 0:53Speaker 00

  And mine, actually.

• 0:54Speaker 01

  The prawn lasagna. So amazing.

• 0:57Speaker 00

  The habanero prawn lasagna.

• 0:58Speaker 01

  I had it on live television.

• 1:00Speaker 00

  Mmm.

• 1:00Speaker 01

  On Sunday brunch and I wolfed it down, ate it all.

• 1:03Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:04Speaker 01

  And I think, I believe I even finished KSIs. I...

• 1:10Speaker 00

  What a celebrity life you lead, James.

• 1:12Speaker 01

  That's what happens when you go on Sunday brunch, man.

• 1:14Speaker 00

  So many showbiz anecdotes. Finishing KSIs lasagna.

• 1:17Speaker 01

  What you want to be doing on Sunday brunch is ending up on the bill with people who, you know, have a very strict eating

• 1:24Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:24Speaker 01

  exercise regime.

• 1:25Speaker 00

  Was he training for his like boxing or something?

• 1:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, so you want someone when they're like, okay, I can try everything but I can't go nuts. I've got to eat at certain times. And you're like, great, because I love this.

• 1:34Speaker 00

  I'm having yours.

• 1:35Speaker 01

  I want to have your prawn lasagna and you have no idea.

• 1:37Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:38Speaker 01

  How much like I'm the one who's landed on their feet.

• 1:40Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:40Speaker 01

  Like, good luck winning that boxing match.

• 1:42Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:43Speaker 01

  But I'm the, I'm the champ.

• 1:45Speaker 00

  Yeah, you're the champ.

• 1:46Speaker 01

  I'm very excited to talk to Easter, especially because that's one of my favourite bites of all time.

• 1:52Speaker 00

  Yes. Easter also co-wrote Flavour, which was an Ottilengi Test Kitchen book.

• 1:57Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:57Speaker 00

  Uh, we of course have had Yotam Ottolenghi on the pod.

• 2:00Speaker 01

  Yes, and he was so patient with us.

• 2:02Speaker 00

  He was so patient with us. Will Easter be as patient with us? I think she listens to the pod, so I doubt it.

• 2:08Speaker 01

  Will certainly be as trying.

• 2:10Speaker 00

  Yes, we're difficult people.

• 2:11Speaker 01

  Yes, so we will do our best in that regard and we'll see if we do our head in or not.

• 2:16Speaker 00

  Yeah. Easter's latest book is called Mescler. Go and get it, but don't get any of her books or any books that she's been involved in. Truly wonderful stuff. But if she says the secret ingredient, which we have pre decided upon, she will be removed from the restaurants. Regardless of how good she is at cooking and that.

• 2:32Speaker 01

  Yes, and this week the secret ingredient is Easter eggs. Sorry.

• 2:35Speaker 00

  Easter eggs. So sorry.

• 2:37Speaker 01

  Eggs. Listen, this is like the 800th episode or something. We've said so many secret ingredients. And Easter, your first name spelt different.

• 2:46Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:47Speaker 01

  But sounds like Easter as in Easter eggs. So we've, we've just gone for that and we don't think you're gonna pick it.

• 2:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:52Speaker 01

  So that's good.

• 2:54Speaker 00

  I do like an Easter egg.

• 2:56Speaker 01

  I love an Easter egg.

• 2:57Speaker 00

  Just tastes different.

• 2:58Speaker 01

  I love an Easter egg and they come up before the podcast and we say about how when we were kids, we thought they would just be giant versions of cream eggs and be full of all the stuff. But you know what? As an adult.

• 3:09Speaker 00

  I'm glad they're not.

• 3:10Speaker 01

  I like that. It's just that the perfect thickness of milk chocolate.

• 3:14Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 3:14Speaker 01

  I prefer dairy milk in Easter egg form.

• 3:17Speaker 00

  Mm hmm.

• 3:17Speaker 01

  And there's something about it. There's something about it that tastes.

• 3:20Speaker 00

  Pure nostalgia as well, isn't it?

• 3:21Speaker 01

  Tastes different.

• 3:21Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 3:22Speaker 01

  It tastes like that's an Easter egg, man. I could be blindfolded. You could give me a square of dairy milk and then some Easter egg chocolate.

• 3:28Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 3:29Speaker 01

  Loads of different forms of dairy milk in different ways. I would be able to pinpoint that's the Easter.

• 3:34Speaker 00

  Yeah, because they're different shapes.

• 3:35Speaker 01

  No, not because of the shape.

• 3:37Speaker 00

  But that's how you would pinpoint it.

• 3:39Speaker 01

  Different. It would taste different.

• 3:41Speaker 00

  I quite like those fancy ones as well, like the Hotel Chocolat ones that you need a hammer and chisel to get apart because they're so thick.

• 3:48Speaker 01

  Yes. Yeah. And they got like designs on them.

• 3:51Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 3:52Speaker 01

  But they're not just a smooth egg. It's like.

• 3:55Speaker 00

  Capri's not a smooth egg.

• 3:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, but I mean, like the designs on the posh ones are like, that's why they're so thick.

• 4:01Speaker 00

  It's like a painting, like a self.

• 4:02Speaker 01

  A whole medallion on there.

• 4:04Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 4:05Speaker 01

  And like a coat of arms.

• 4:06Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 4:07Speaker 01

  And then you're like, that's when you know that's real, that's real, um, royalty, royal egg.

• 4:13Speaker 00

  This is the off menu menu of Easter Belfrage.

• 4:16Speaker 01

  Easter Belfrage.

• 4:24Speaker 00

  Welcome Easter to the Dream Restaurant.

• 4:27Speaker 02

  Oh my god.

• 4:28Speaker 01

  Welcome Easter Melville to the Dream Restaurant this many of a sudden time.

• 4:32Speaker 02

  I've been waiting for that all my life.

• 4:34Speaker 01

  Yeah?

• 4:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:36Speaker 01

  Did it match up?

• 4:37Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean, it's small before that I couldn't have imagined.

• 4:39Speaker 01

  Thank you very much.

• 4:40Speaker 00

  I'd imagine the bit of your life before this podcast was a thing was a very confusing time for you, waiting for that specifically.

• 4:46Speaker 02

  Yeah, it really was. It was, I was, I felt like I was blind and now I see.

• 4:50Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 4:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 4:51Speaker 00

  Everything clicked the moment this podcast came on the scene.

• 4:53Speaker 02

  Exactly.

• 4:54Speaker 01

  So I bet a lot of people felt like that when our podcast came on the scene.

• 4:57Speaker 02

  I think so. I think you've changed many, many lives.

• 5:00Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 5:00Speaker 02

  You've certainly made me laugh a hell of a lot.

• 5:03Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, yeah. This guy makes me laugh all the time.

• 5:05Speaker 00

  So does this guy.

• 5:06Speaker 02

  I'm actually really intrigued. Well, I can't wait to like see your laugh because I don't know if anyone's ever told you that your laugh sounds really fake.

• 5:13Speaker 00

  Does it?

• 5:14Speaker 02

  It's that, don't you think? So whenever I hear your laugh, it sounds really fake. So I'm like, I can't, I can't wait to see your actual facial expression to see if it's real.

• 5:22Speaker 00

  Imagine if at no point I laugh in this episode.

• 5:24Speaker 02

  Well, that's gonna be deeply embarrassing.

• 5:26Speaker 01

  He could be in his own head now.

• 5:26Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah.

• 5:27Speaker 01

  He could be thinking about it too much.

• 5:29Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 5:29Speaker 02

  Have you never thought that?

• 5:30Speaker 01

  That it's fake?

• 5:32Speaker 02

  It sounds fake.

• 5:33Speaker 01

  I, I, I.

• 5:33Speaker 02

  You obviously see his facial expressions when he laughs, but like.

• 5:36Speaker 00

  My face goes everywhere when I laugh as well.

• 5:38Speaker 02

  Okay, well, I can't really see that.

• 5:39Speaker 00

  All over the place.

• 5:40Speaker 01

  He, he's part of a trio, him and Tom Neenan and Nish Kumar, who all went to university together. All have big, loud laughs and they really just like, their whole entire body and everything that they, there's so much joy. They're not just laughing and enjoying what has made them laugh.

• 5:56Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 5:57Speaker 01

  They're also just, you can tell the feeling of laughing makes them happy. And you can see all three of them on their faces are like, this is so lovely. I love it. Like.

• 6:06Speaker 00

  Does the feeling of laughter not make you happy?

• 6:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, but you guys are like, it's like, it's like a drug. Like, you can really see the three of you, you're just completely immersed in it. You let yourself go.

• 6:16Speaker 00

  I've had different laughs throughout my life as well.

• 6:18Speaker 02

  Oh, really? Have you, do you work on them?

• 6:19Speaker 00

  No, I think the only time I consciously changed my laugh was, I got really into laughing like Lou from Neighbours. Do you remember Lou from Neighbours?

• 6:26Speaker 02

  Do an impression?

• 6:27Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 6:29Speaker 02

  Oh, the older guy.

• 6:30Speaker 00

  Yes, yeah, yeah. Harold Bishop's frenemy.

• 6:33Speaker 01

  Oh, really?

• 6:34Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 6:34Speaker 02

  Oh, my God, Harold Bishop, what blast from the past.

• 6:37Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 6:37Speaker 01

  What happened to Harold in the end? I didn't really keep up with it.

• 6:40Speaker 02

  It's still going?

• 6:41Speaker 00

  No, I think it's finished now because it went to Amazon.

• 6:44Speaker 02

  What?

• 6:44Speaker 00

  And starred Misha Barton from The O C for a bit.

• 6:48Speaker 02

  You're kidding me?

• 6:48Speaker 00

  No, I'm not at all. She cropped up in Neighbours.

• 6:51Speaker 02

  What?

• 6:52Speaker 00

  So Harold Bishop obviously got washed off a rock.

• 6:54Speaker 02

  Obviously.

• 6:55Speaker 00

  Back in the day.

• 6:55Speaker 01

  I didn't know that.

• 6:56Speaker 02

  I didn't know that either.

• 6:57Speaker 01

  What does it mean?

• 6:58Speaker 02

  What? Yeah, what do you mean? Speaking of being washed off a rock, did you hear about the surfer guy who went surfing off the coast of Sydney? And then disappeared and like a day later, they found him stranded on like an abandoned island, like miles and miles away. Anyway, sorry.

• 7:12Speaker 00

  No, that's impressive because that's real life, but for Neighbours, that wouldn't cut it.

• 7:17Speaker 02

  No, but what was really funny is that I'd never heard of this island. And I looked up on Google Maps and people had already, like within hours of the news piece coming out, people had already started leaving reviews saying like, great place for a break if you get washed up at sea.

• 7:30Speaker 01

  Wow, who's doing that?

• 7:32Speaker 02

  I know, I don't know.

• 7:33Speaker 01

  But that's a very specific type of person.

• 7:35Speaker 02

  And I don't know why.

• 7:36Speaker 00

  Anyway, he got washed off a rock.

• 7:38Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 7:38Speaker 00

  Madge just found his glasses in a little rock pool. It was very sad. I remember that when I was a kid. Years later, he turns up again. He's completely lost his memory.

• 7:47Speaker 02

  Was it on that island, Governor's Island?

• 7:50Speaker 00

  It might have been on the Straight to the Island. I think he just went a bit around the coast. And then he thought his name was Ted and he was in the Salvation Army.

• 7:56Speaker 02

  Oh, wow. Okay.

• 7:57Speaker 01

  I should, I should watch Neighbours.

• 7:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, we need to catch up on about 15 years of Neighbours.

• 8:02Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 8:02Speaker 02

  It's on like every day for a long, ever anyway.

• 8:04Speaker 01

  But it has finished now, so we know there's a finite amount of episodes. We could start binging it.

• 8:09Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 8:10Speaker 02

  I think that's a bad idea, actually.

• 8:11Speaker 01

  No, no, no, I think that's a great idea. It would be really good.

• 8:13Speaker 00

  That's a new pod.

• 8:14Speaker 02

  Of all the shows to watch.

• 8:16Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 8:17Speaker 01

  We could do a pod, the three of us. You're out, great Benita. We could do a pod, the three of us, and we just watch all of Neighbours from the start.

• 8:26Speaker 00

  But we have to watch the same episode twice a day because that's how they used to show it.

• 8:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 8:30Speaker 02

  Okay, that sounds really fun, like a really great use of my time.

• 8:32Speaker 00

  Yes, absolutely. Yeah, yeah.

• 8:34Speaker 01

  How have you been using your time though lately?

• 8:38Speaker 02

  How have I been using my time? Well, mainly always just eating or thinking about food, which is, as I imagine you guys do as well. I just did a pop up last night and so I'm like slightly hungover from having only two margaritas after service, but.

• 8:53Speaker 01

  How was that? So you, a pop up? So like, is this, was this the first night of the pop up?

• 8:57Speaker 02

  It was one, it was a one night only thing at the standard. Have you been to Decimo at the top of the standard?

• 9:02Speaker 00

  No, I've been to the bottom of the standard.

• 9:04Speaker 02

  You absolutely must go to the top.

• 9:05Speaker 00

  Okay, you gotta go to the top.

• 9:06Speaker 02

  You've gotta go to the top. So there's a restaurant at the top of the standard, beautiful views, like such nice decor, kind of, like feels like seventies Californian, Mexican, like cactuses and anyway, really, really nice. The food there is incredible. It's like Mexican, Spanish, and the head chef there, Paula, is just, she makes incredible tacos. Anyway, I did a pop up there last night, so I've been cooking there for the last two days. I feel a bit mental, actually.

• 9:30Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 9:30Speaker 02

  Lack of sleep and like elbow deep in prawns for the last two days.

• 9:35Speaker 01

  Lot of prawns.

• 9:36Speaker 02

  Lot of prawns.

• 9:38Speaker 00

  We should talk about prawn, we should talk about the prawn lasagna up top.

• 9:41Speaker 01

  Loved it so much. Best thing I've ever had to eat on Sunday brunch. I know that doesn't sound like a compliment, but.

• 9:46Speaker 02

  Honestly, I almost, maybe I did, I shed a little tear when I heard that. Honestly, it is, because I know how much you love lasagna, I have heard. So to, to hear that you loved it that much was actually like life changing.

• 9:57Speaker 01

  I think about it a lot. I wolfed it down. Every time there's any kind of lasagnas on menus, I'll look to see if there's prawns in it now and it never is and I get really disappointed.

• 10:06Speaker 00

  But that's good. No one's trying, no one's trying to copy you.

• 10:09Speaker 02

  Not, not yet. Anyway, I've, I've seen some like, I mean, there's obviously, you can get like seafood lasagnas and I've seen some people do some crab lasagnas recently, which sound really good. But no, I've, I've also never seen a prawn lasagna. But yeah, it is, I, I got a lot of flak? Is flak a word?

• 10:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:24Speaker 00

  From the lasagna, from the.

• 10:25Speaker 02

  Flak or slack?

• 10:26Speaker 00

  Flak.

• 10:26Speaker 01

  You got flak.

• 10:27Speaker 02

  I got flak from people who are like.

• 10:29Speaker 00

  A lot of slack would be them going like, yeah, go for it.

• 10:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, do what you want.

• 10:32Speaker 02

  Oh, okay.

• 10:32Speaker 00

  Yeah, flak.

• 10:33Speaker 02

  Lot of flak from people saying like, who do you think you are cooking of prawn for that long? Like prawns need to be just like pan fried. And I'm like, I'm telling you to make it into a ragu and like cook it slowly. And people are like, are you mental? But it does work.

• 10:45Speaker 00

  Who's giving you flak?

• 10:46Speaker 02

  There are the people.

• 10:47Speaker 00

  Lasagna people.

• 10:48Speaker 02

  The people.

• 10:48Speaker 01

  They say, who do you think you are?

• 10:50Speaker 02

  They say, who do you think you are? Who the fuck do you think you are?

• 10:53Speaker 01

  Who's cooking the prawn for that long?

• 10:54Speaker 02

  The prawn police.

• 10:55Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 10:55Speaker 01

  I I suppose that's the thing that they're getting angry about. I thought they're gonna get angry that you're even putting prawns in a lasagna.

• 11:01Speaker 02

  But they get upset about that too.

• 11:02Speaker 01

  How long you're cooking it for is what they're furious about.

• 11:05Speaker 02

  I mean, people get upset about a lot of things, but they really have strong feelings about how long you cook a prawn.

• 11:12Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 11:13Speaker 02

  And I'm here to tell you, you can make it into a ragu.

• 11:16Speaker 01

  Anyone's job, you look at it and you just think, oh, I bet, I bet they don't get that much, you know, grief from people.

• 11:22Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 11:22Speaker 01

  I bet, or or I bet I can imagine what the complaints are. Every time you speak to someone about their job, the things that people get angry about are absolutely beyond what you could have imagined or ever predicted.

• 11:32Speaker 02

  No, it is ridiculous.

• 11:33Speaker 01

  How dare you cook a prawn for that long? Who do you think you are?

• 11:35Speaker 00

  Who do you think you are is such a funny thing to say.

• 11:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, really funny.

• 11:38Speaker 02

  I actually feel like I've like reached peak prawn now. I think I'm actually over them. There's actually no prawns on my menu, which is bonkers, because everyone who knows me knows me as like the prawn lady.

• 11:49Speaker 00

  Hmm, I hope that's not true, Esther.

• 11:51Speaker 02

  No one's actually ever called me that, but um, I mean, everyone knows that I'm obsessed with prawns and there's not, I only just realised that there's not one prawn on this menu.

• 11:59Speaker 00

  Well, I think if last night you you were elbow deep in prawns.

• 12:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, specifically.

• 12:03Speaker 00

  The last thing you want to talk about is prawns. You don't want prawns on your dream menu at this point, do you?

• 12:07Speaker 02

  Absolutely not.

• 12:08Speaker 01

  What do you think about, you're the best person to ask this. There's a few people on the podcast, I think, have maybe asked this question to, but never before I've been so excited about the answer. What do you think about prawn cocktail crisps?

• 12:20Speaker 02

  Oh, um.

• 12:21Speaker 01

  The flavour?

• 12:22Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 12:23Speaker 01

  How authentic is it?

• 12:24Speaker 00

  As opposed to, huh? Of course, of course, the flavour.

• 12:27Speaker 02

  Of course, the flavour. Well, the flavour, the cr- okay, prawn cocktail crisps. I haven't had them in a really, really, really, really long time. I think the only ones I've had are the just like the pink walkers ones. Used to think they were delicious. I don't think they taste anything like prawn. They're just sort of like a bit tangy, which is not really what a prawn is. Well, actually, no, haven't, yeah, prawn cocktail, yes, it's supposed to be ketchup, mayo, prawns?

• 12:49Speaker 00

  Yeah, I guess. So but it's it's that that it tastes of. It tastes of ketchup.

• 12:52Speaker 02

  I guess, yeah, it tastes of. Does it taste of prawn or does it just taste of ketchup?

• 12:57Speaker 00

  I'm not getting any prawn out of that situation.

• 12:59Speaker 02

  I think it's just like ketchup with like an eau de like seafood seasoning.

• 13:02Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 13:03Speaker 02

  But it's not like I'm not getting prawn, but I do like them. I'm not a massive crisp person, so.

• 13:09Speaker 00

  You're a prawn lady.

• 13:10Speaker 02

  I'm a prawn lady, but I'm not a crisp person.

• 13:12Speaker 01

  You can't be both.

• 13:13Speaker 02

  No, I can't. No, you you're not allowed to be both, actually.

• 13:17Speaker 00

  I'm not a crisp, a crisp guy.

• 13:19Speaker 02

  No.

• 13:19Speaker 00

  Really. You know, people, people.

• 13:20Speaker 02

  You're not a crisp man.

• 13:22Speaker 01

  You're truffle crisps. You love them.

• 13:23Speaker 02

  Oh, I do not like truffle crisps.

• 13:24Speaker 00

  Oh, really? And see, I like the Torres truffle crisps. So great.

• 13:27Speaker 02

  I can't bear that smell.

• 13:28Speaker 00

  Really?

• 13:29Speaker 02

  You in the same camp?

• 13:30Speaker 01

  No, I, I, I, but my partner is in that camp. So like.

• 13:34Speaker 02

  Horrendous.

• 13:35Speaker 01

  Now I'm, you know, every anytime I do smell truffles or anything like that and we're together, I'm like, we've got, I've got to get it, get it out of here. Because as soon as she smells that, she's gonna fly off the handle.

• 13:45Speaker 02

  There hardly any emotion on your face.

• 13:47Speaker 00

  Yeah, well, no, I'm just enjoying it.

• 13:48Speaker 01

  You got busted.

• 13:50Speaker 00

  Just trying to enjoy myself, Easter.

• 13:52Speaker 02

  That did not look real.

• 13:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, you didn't think my truffle onion dough was funny? You're telling me.

• 13:57Speaker 00

  I have had that. I have been accused of that before for.

• 14:00Speaker 02

  What did you say?

• 14:01Speaker 00

  For having dead eyes when I laugh, but I can't really do anything about it.

• 14:04Speaker 02

  No, but I'm, I think hopefully it'll get more animated.

• 14:07Speaker 00

  No, no, no, that was it. That's as far as we go.

• 14:09Speaker 01

  Do a podcast about being told you've got dead eyes when you laugh?

• 14:12Speaker 00

  Yeah, that's good. Good idea.

• 14:13Speaker 01

  We could call it. Laugh-a-Boy.

• 14:16Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 14:17Speaker 02

  Laugh-a-Boy?

• 14:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 14:18Speaker 02

  What?

• 14:18Speaker 01

  La- Laugh-a-Boy.

• 14:20Speaker 02

  Laugh-a-Boy. Oh, yeah. Okay, that's a good one.

• 14:25Speaker 01

  We will start with still a sparkling water. Do you have a preference, Easter?

• 14:28Speaker 02

  I absolutely do have a preference. And actually, I'm gonna have to steal someone's ideas, one of your previous guests, one of my favorite episodes.

• 14:36Speaker 00

  Great. We, we, it's only happened on one occasion, maybe when someone's stolen an idea.

• 14:40Speaker 02

  Oh, I'm stealing the idea and enhancing it to my taste. Is that right?

• 14:43Speaker 00

  Rather than the dish itself. It's the idea.

• 14:46Speaker 02

  It's the idea. It's the execution. So May Martin, living legend.

• 14:50Speaker 01

  Ah, congratulations, May.

• 14:52Speaker 02

  They wanted, I think, water from a babbling brook. And when I heard that, I was like, what better way to receive water?

• 14:59Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 14:59Speaker 02

  But I'm an absolutely a sparkling water girl. I'm obsessed with sparkling water, inject it into my veins. So I would like sparkling water.

• 15:06Speaker 00

  Terrible idea, by the way.

• 15:07Speaker 02

  That would actually be horrendous. Imagine having sparkling water.

• 15:10Speaker 00

  Yeah, famously bubbles going into the veins.

• 15:13Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah. Instant heart attack.

• 15:14Speaker 00

  Instant death.

• 15:15Speaker 02

  Instant stroke. Okay, so maybe not into the veins, but yes, the babbling brook. So, straight from the Babbling Brook, very cold sparkling water, short glass, like this kind of thing.

• 15:26Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 15:26Speaker 02

  Hate tall glasses, despise tall glasses. I don't actually know why. I knew someone was gonna ask me that when I said I hate tall glasses, one of you, but I don't have a reason.

• 15:36Speaker 01

  Who do you think you are?

• 15:39Speaker 02

  Who do I think I am? Um, I don't know. I wonder why it is. I think, I think, I feel like there's less room for things. Like, you get a tall glass and it's like, if it's full of ice, there's just not really belly any liquid in there.

• 15:51Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 15:52Speaker 02

  But is that the only reason also?

• 15:53Speaker 01

  Well, you know what people are gonna come back with for that. They're gonna go, what if I have a short glass that's full of ice?

• 15:57Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 15:57Speaker 02

  I mean, well, I actually have a note here on my note, say, three ice cubes.

• 16:02Speaker 00

  Oh, okay.

• 16:03Speaker 01

  Standard size?

• 16:04Speaker 02

  Medium, medium size, like that? Is that medium size?

• 16:09Speaker 00

  That looks standard size to me.

• 16:10Speaker 01

  That's standard.

• 16:10Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 16:11Speaker 02

  Oh, all right, well, standard, three standard ice cubes. Cold sparkling water from a Babbling Brook and a bit of lime, but not like super limey, just like medium lime, medium lime, medium ice cubes.

• 16:21Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 16:22Speaker 02

  Medium glass.

• 16:23Speaker 01

  You love lime, you love the lime bikes.

• 16:24Speaker 02

  Oh, I love lime.

• 16:26Speaker 01

  Before we started recording, all these, all these were talking about was lime bikes and, and she was shocked we hadn't been on lime bikes.

• 16:32Speaker 02

  Me neither, all three of you.

• 16:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 16:34Speaker 02

  The great Benito included.

• 16:35Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 16:35Speaker 02

  Who is not wearing a sombrero.

• 16:37Speaker 01

  Which you, you.

• 16:38Speaker 00

  Something else, something else we put a pin in to come back to is you imagine, when you're listening, you imagine the great Benito to be wearing a sombrero.

• 16:45Speaker 02

  I imagined him to be a Mexican man wearing a sombrero.

• 16:48Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 16:48Speaker 02

  But no.

• 16:49Speaker 01

  I mean.

• 16:50Speaker 02

  The listeners will never know.

• 16:51Speaker 01

  Well, they will now.

• 16:52Speaker 00

  They will now, you burnt his cover.

• 16:53Speaker 02

  They know that he's not a Mexican man with a sombrero, but they don't know much more than that.

• 16:57Speaker 01

  They've got one thing to cross off the list.

• 16:58Speaker 00

  Yeah. This is the longest game of gas, whoever.

• 17:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, okay, so the Mexican man in a sombrero.

• 17:04Speaker 00

  Flip down the picture of the Mexican guy. That's not him.

• 17:07Speaker 01

  They haven't got a lot more to go.

• 17:09Speaker 00

  I kind of agree with the tall, thin glasses.

• 17:11Speaker 02

  No.

• 17:12Speaker 00

  But I find sometimes the short glasses, if there's some ice in there, if it's like a cocktail or something, I drink it too quickly, because, because of the big mouth hole.

• 17:19Speaker 02

  But do you think that you drink a tall drink slower?

• 17:23Speaker 00

  I think it feels like I do, because it looks like there's more level in it, do you know what I mean?

• 17:27Speaker 02

  No, correct.

• 17:28Speaker 01

  No matter how big the drink, two gulps and he's done.

• 17:31Speaker 02

  Me too.

• 17:31Speaker 00

  I'm a gulper.

• 17:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, I'm a gulper too.

• 17:33Speaker 01

  It doesn't even like make any noise. It's just like, it's just gone.

• 17:37Speaker 02

  No facial expressions, no noise, dead eyes.

• 17:39Speaker 01

  Literally, like, people say about people drinking like a fish, it's literally like a fish, though. Like, just like, mouth opens and it's all just gone.

• 17:47Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 17:48Speaker 01

  No noise, no nothing.

• 17:49Speaker 00

  What's the point in taking time over it? I want another, I want another one. I want to try something else.

• 17:53Speaker 02

  I think a medium amount of time is also good in this respect.

• 17:56Speaker 00

  You're obsessed with medium?

• 17:57Speaker 02

  I do, I am. I think medium is where it's at.

• 18:01Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 18:01Speaker 02

  Not too little, not too much.

• 18:02Speaker 00

  I tell you what, the glass shop, Kate, these really trendy glasses. You've been to loads of these places, I'd imagine. They're almost like completely shallow. They're like little cat bowls.

• 18:11Speaker 02

  No.

• 18:14Speaker 00

  They are like little cat bowls.

• 18:15Speaker 01

  I know, I know what you mean. It's like they've taken a glass, like a standard tumbler.

• 18:20Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 18:20Speaker 01

  And they've cut that in half.

• 18:21Speaker 00

  It's a demi tumbler.

• 18:23Speaker 02

  A demi tumbler, yeah. No, I don't like those either. This, I think, is slightly too big for my liking. I would like it to be sort of that big.

• 18:29Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 18:30Speaker 02

  But anyway, semantics.

• 18:31Speaker 01

  Doing visual references.

• 18:33Speaker 02

  But isn't, this is a filmed podcast.

• 18:37Speaker 01

  Well, he fucking loves it now. He's filming it, puts it on YouTube, it's a nightmare.

• 18:40Speaker 02

  I don't know where the cameras are, but this is the glass we're referring to.

• 18:42Speaker 00

  One right there.

• 18:43Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 18:43Speaker 00

  Yeah, we got it, we got it.

• 18:44Speaker 01

  They're all here. He's obsessed.

• 18:45Speaker 02

  There's one there.

• 18:46Speaker 01

  He's obsessed with it. All he talks about is filming it now. And you're playing into his hands by doing like, it's this much and stuff like that. He's loving it. He's sitting there going, this is why I started a YouTube channel.

• 18:58Speaker 01

  Awful. Pop lumps or bread? Pop lumps or bread, Easter belfry? Pop lumps or bread?

• 19:02Speaker 02

  Oh my God, I've been waiting for that.

• 19:04Speaker 01

  No, you haven't. I made you jump.

• 19:06Speaker 00

  You were, you were gobsman.

• 19:07Speaker 02

  I was literally staring right out at you and you got me. Fucking hell, excuse me, am I, you're allowed to swear. What is allowed?

• 19:13Speaker 01

  Come on, you're a fan of the pod, you know we let it fly.

• 19:16Speaker 02

  God, I'm slightly hungover and, um, yeah, I really almost threw up my heart just then.

• 19:22Speaker 00

  That's the, that's the ultimate episode when you, you surprise someone so much they throw up.

• 19:26Speaker 01

  Then I'd be like, but you were right, we should film it.

• 19:29Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 19:30Speaker 01

  She threw her heart up.

• 19:31Speaker 00

  And that's a clip.

• 19:32Speaker 01

  That's a clip. Bam, beating heart on the table.

• 19:35Speaker 00

  Eight million views.

• 19:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, we did it.

• 19:38Speaker 02

  Oh my God, well done.

• 19:40Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 19:40Speaker 02

  Well done, sir.

• 19:41Speaker 01

  Thank you very much. Number one podcast.

• 19:45Speaker 02

  I'm also sad that you're not dressed up as a genie, but I should probably go to one of the live shows for that, right? You do dress up, right?

• 19:51Speaker 01

  No.

• 19:51Speaker 02

  No, never?

• 19:53Speaker 00

  We've got a lamp, we've got a big lamp on the stage for the live shows.

• 19:55Speaker 01

  I jump out of the lamp, sure, but I'm not dressing up.

• 19:57Speaker 00

  No, for the live shows, we wear our own merch.

• 20:00Speaker 02

  Oh, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay.

• 20:02Speaker 01

  Clever.

• 20:02Speaker 02

  That is smart.

• 20:03Speaker 01

  Cause first tour, we had our own merch on, second tour, we got the merch, which is pictures of us on the last tour. So we're wearing the merch from the last one.

• 20:11Speaker 02

  Oh, the inception thing.

• 20:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, we should keep doing that forever.

• 20:15Speaker 00

  The next show is next, next year, it's gonna be cra- it's gonna blow people's minds. They're not gonna know where they are.

• 20:19Speaker 02

  What do you have on the back?

• 20:20Speaker 01

  Tour dates, I think, or?

• 20:21Speaker 00

  Good point, I've never checked, really.

• 20:22Speaker 01

  I think it's been tour dates.

• 20:23Speaker 02

  Never checked.

• 20:24Speaker 00

  I just put it on.

• 20:25Speaker 02

  My heart is still beating, my god.

• 20:26Speaker 01

  Really?

• 20:27Speaker 00

  That's good, though.

• 20:27Speaker 02

  Woo, yeah.

• 20:28Speaker 00

  It should be.

• 20:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 20:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. I'm, I'm.

• 20:31Speaker 02

  You look very proud.

• 20:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm really proud of myself. It's been a while since I've got people.

• 20:35Speaker 02

  Really?

• 20:36Speaker 01

  Series one, I was getting them every single episode.

• 20:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:38Speaker 01

  And now it's like.

• 20:39Speaker 02

  I mean, I knew to expect it, I just didn't know when. Anyway, poof, poppdom's all bread.

• 20:44Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 20:45Speaker 02

  I'm gonna go, well, I'm not really a massive poppadom person either, not a bread gal or a pop- no, I do like bread. I'm gonna go with like grilled, really grilled, olive oily, garlicky bread with chicken liver pate. But not like, not like a whipped chicken liver pate, like a Tuscan, I know you love it, but I think you love the

• 21:05Speaker 00

  I just love it, I just love it.

• 21:06Speaker 02

  crunchy, creamy, whippy one.

• 21:07Speaker 00

  Hello, I love, I just love it.

• 21:09Speaker 02

  But I don't want that one, I want like a Tuscan style, kind of like, it's more sort of bitty and textured.

• 21:17Speaker 02

  Bitty and textured doesn't sound good, to be fair. That was a, that was a fair reaction. But do you know what I mean?

• 21:22Speaker 00

  I know what you mean, yeah.

• 21:23Speaker 02

  Sagey, anchovy, anchovy-y, heavy.

• 21:26Speaker 00

  I still love that.

• 21:27Speaker 02

  Chicken liver crostini. But like, on, the, the bread has to be super grilled, cat food.

• 21:32Speaker 00

  It's a bit like cat food.

• 21:33Speaker 02

  It does smell like cat food.

• 21:34Speaker 01

  Not smell it, but it just looks like it.

• 21:36Speaker 00

  No, but it does, when you.

• 21:37Speaker 02

  Can you not talk about my, my, my bread and poppadom style like this, please?

• 21:42Speaker 01

  Get ready, I, I, I speak my mind.

• 21:44Speaker 02

  I speak my mind.

• 21:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:46Speaker 02

  Okay, fair enough, but I am obsessed with chicken liver.

• 21:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:50Speaker 02

  In a very, very, I'm actually liver, full stop, I'm actually in a club called The Liver Lovers.

• 21:54Speaker 01

  Go on.

• 21:55Speaker 02

  Self-confessed.

• 21:57Speaker 01

  How many people in The Liver Lovers?

• 21:59Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 21:59Speaker 02

  For shout out, Flick, Melek, Holly and myself.

• 22:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, how did it start?

• 22:06Speaker 02

  Just a mutual love of liver, really.

• 22:08Speaker 00

  But did you know each other previously or did you, did your eyes, did your eyes meet across a butcher's counter?

• 22:13Speaker 02

  Across a big piece of liver. No, we've no, we knew each other previously. We've known each other for a long time. Well, Malek less so, maybe like three years and, um, Flick and Holly longer. Anyway, whatever. We all love liver. When it's like, we bonded over like Turkish, like lamb's liver with sort of like crispy fat, you know?

• 22:30Speaker 00

  Uh huh.

• 22:30Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 22:30Speaker 01

  That sounds good.

• 22:31Speaker 02

  And then we did have grand plans to like, visit every Turkish restaurant in London to try their lamb's liver. We've only been to one, but.

• 22:40Speaker 01

  Oof, that's a very long.

• 22:41Speaker 02

  We are still, yeah, I know. It's, it's not good. It's not good, but we are the liver lovers and I do love liver. So I'm going to start with chicken liver, Cristini.

• 22:48Speaker 00

  How often is the, really Admiral attempts to try and move it off the liver lover group there, by the way. But that's not going to happen for a long time, just to let you know.

• 22:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 22:56Speaker 00

  Um, how often is, is it like a WhatsApp group?

• 22:59Speaker 02

  It is a WhatsApp group. That's really the most action that's happening, just like.

• 23:02Speaker 01

  Well, read us some stuff from the liver lovers WhatsApp group.

• 23:06Speaker 02

  I don't have my phone here. I didn't bring my phone into the, I've only.

• 23:08Speaker 01

  What?

• 23:09Speaker 00

  Well, I, I want to know how, how often, how often the WhatsApp group's being updated. How, how often is someone dropping in liver relevant content?

• 23:17Speaker 02

  You're making me feel really bad now because we actually don't talk about liver that much. We basically just plan. Like, let's all meet up and go for dinner and eat liver. Who's free on this date? And then it just never happens.

• 23:29Speaker 01

  Never happens.

• 23:30Speaker 02

  God, it's a terrible club, isn't it?

• 23:32Speaker 00

  It's a bad club.

• 23:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's a pretty bad club, I think. I mean, a, a, after this podcast, you're going to go on there and go, guess what? I talked about the liver lovers.

• 23:39Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 23:39Speaker 01

  On a podcast and the world's going to know about us, guys. I mean, surely you're going to tell them.

• 23:43Speaker 02

  Oh, God. I would love any listeners to maybe like comment with their favourite liver. So I know where to go.

• 23:49Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 23:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 23:51Speaker 01

  Oh, well, I'll definitely let you know where the best liver is.

• 23:53Speaker 02

  I don't want to talk about the liver lovers anymore. I feel deeply embarrassed that we haven't actually eaten that much liver together, but we do all love liver.

• 24:01Speaker 00

  Do you ever talk about the sort of bad reputation that liver has amongst the general population?

• 24:05Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. We know we're like cooler than most.

• 24:07Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would have since said that.

• 24:10Speaker 02

  No, but I did.

• 24:11Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 24:13Speaker 02

  I mean, you know, you have to have like a certain je ne sais quoi to love liver, I think.

• 24:18Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 24:18Speaker 02

  Not, not, not every regular guy. Most people don't love it.

• 24:21Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 24:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, but the, the liver pate, when it is creamy and smooth, I think is delicious.

• 24:28Speaker 02

  It's so fucking good.

• 24:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 24:30Speaker 02

  Oh my god.

• 24:31Speaker 00

  It does smell of cat food though, but that is not an insult.

• 24:34Speaker 02

  No, this is not, this is not going well. This is not going well. Picture the scene. We're in Tuscany.

• 24:39Speaker 01

  I just made a confession there. Yeah, yeah.

• 24:41Speaker 02

  What did you just say?

• 24:41Speaker 01

  You went right over it because you're, you're so, we've, we've got in your head about the liver.

• 24:47Speaker 01

  He just said he, he wants to eat his cat's cat food.

• 24:49Speaker 02

  Wait, what?

• 24:50Speaker 00

  Sometimes I'm feeding my cat and I'm like, and it does smell like cat food, but it looks human, looks like human food.

• 24:57Speaker 02

  Uh.

• 24:58Speaker 00

  We've started giving our cats soup.

• 24:59Speaker 02

  Really?

• 25:00Speaker 00

  Cat soup.

• 25:01Speaker 02

  Cat soup, made of?

• 25:02Speaker 00

  I mean, to me, it just looks like chicken and this, I think the one this morning was like chicken and pea.

• 25:07Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 25:08Speaker 00

  You can actually see chicken and pea and there's like a lot of like.

• 25:10Speaker 02

  Do they eat the peas?

• 25:11Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 25:12Speaker 02

  Hmm. My dog used to like eat around the peas when we gave him leftovers.

• 25:16Speaker 00

  Right. No.

• 25:17Speaker 02

  No.

• 25:18Speaker 00

  Pigs eating the peas.

• 25:18Speaker 01

  Do you give him some bread to mop it up with afterwards? Like a gentleman?

• 25:22Speaker 00

  Yeah. Give him his little spoon.

• 25:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 25:25Speaker 00

  Tuck his napkin in.

• 25:26Speaker 02

  Sweetie.

• 25:28Speaker 01

  Some cat food you see, or some pet food you see advertised.

• 25:32Speaker 00

  Yes. Yes.

• 25:33Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 25:33Speaker 01

  Sometimes you see it advertised and it says tested by humans.

• 25:37Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 25:38Speaker 01

  And you're like, who has got that?

• 25:39Speaker 00

  What grim humans doing that?

• 25:41Speaker 02

  It is literally just a bit of meat.

• 25:44Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 25:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, so it's, it's not that big a deal.

• 25:46Speaker 00

  But what is the smell though? Because if it is just a bit of meat, why does it smell like that?

• 25:50Speaker 02

  I think it's the gelatin.

• 25:51Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 25:51Speaker 02

  That has the smell.

• 25:52Speaker 00

  And they're adding vitamins and stuff, right?

• 25:54Speaker 02

  Vitamins.

• 25:55Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 25:55Speaker 02

  Always smelly.

• 25:56Speaker 00

  They are.

• 25:57Speaker 02

  It's true. Smelly, smelly vitamin, smelly gelatin makes a smelly bowl of cat food.

• 26:03Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 26:03Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 26:03Speaker 00

  If you ever open a, open a little jar of multivitamins, it stinks like a farm.

• 26:08Speaker 01

  It does stink.

• 26:09Speaker 02

  Like a farm?

• 26:10Speaker 00

  Yeah, like a farm or hay.

• 26:11Speaker 02

  I kind of like the smell of vitamin C.

• 26:12Speaker 01

  Oh yeah, that's great.

• 26:13Speaker 02

  Like the limey.

• 26:13Speaker 01

  Hmm. Yeah, that's lovely, but the multi ones, when they all get together, they stink.

• 26:19Speaker 02

  That is vitaminist.

• 26:20Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 26:21Speaker 01

  You've got to keep them apart. They absolutely stink when they get together.

• 26:25Speaker 00

  James is a vitamin segregationist.

• 26:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'll say it. I think that sounds like a delicious bread course.

• 26:32Speaker 02

  You're just saying that. You don't really believe it.

• 26:35Speaker 01

  I would obviously change up the chicken. I'd have a smooth one for my tastes.

• 26:43Speaker 02

  But I didn't get to tell you where I want it. So it has to be from the co-op in Ruffiner, which is the town where I grew up, near where I grew up in Italy.

• 26:51Speaker 00

  There's a co-op there?

• 26:52Speaker 02

  No, but it's not like the English co-op. It's not like the English co-op. They have co-ops in Italy. Well, in Tuscany, they call it Hoop because they don't pronounce the K. It's like a H. But it's the best supermarket in the world and they make the best chicken liver, like Figatini is what it's called. And it's unbelievable. So, but in Tuscany, when you get, it's a classic starter, the chicken liver crostini, but they always do it with unsalted bread because like hundreds of years ago, salt used to be expensive. But I'm like, get with the times. Salt is no longer expensive. You can put salt in your bread now. But so strictly, I would need it to be salted bread.

• 27:29Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 27:29Speaker 02

  Very grilled, very much like a lot of olive oil.

• 27:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 27:33Speaker 02

  I feel like we should move on from the chicken liver.

• 27:35Speaker 01

  You always want to move on from stuff.

• 27:36Speaker 00

  Yeah, that doesn't work with us.

• 27:38Speaker 02

  We've literally been talking about cat food and liver for about 45.

• 27:40Speaker 01

  Don't worry. Don't worry. You're in good hands.

• 27:44Speaker 01

  We know we're going to move on. He'll edit it later. You're okay.

• 27:48Speaker 02

  Fair enough. All right.

• 27:50Speaker 00

  We'll move on now, will we?

• 27:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, definitely. We've talked about that for fucking ages. We've talked a couple of hours.

• 27:58Speaker 00

  Today's episode of the Off Menu Podcast is sponsored by Cozy, the home of possibilities, James.

• 28:04Speaker 01

  Oh man, Ed, Cozy has everything you need to make your home feel like it has a plan. Do you know what I mean?

• 28:10Speaker 00

  I know what you mean. Cozy is a wonderful furniture company. It makes furnishing your whole home easy. Sofas, dining, storage, rugs, bedroom, even outdoor, all designed to make your space feel put together without the usual furniture stress. And James, we talk about dream meals on this podcast. But you know what? We very rarely talk about where we want to eat. Eat this dream meal.

• 28:29Speaker 01

  Sure, yeah, I like it when it does come up. It is very important. It changes the whole meal, the setting, the vibe. And Cozy's modular customizable furniture for the whole home does just that.

• 28:40Speaker 00

  And the meal, James, doesn't necessarily end at dessert. We've often talked about wanting to take our maybe final course through to a comfy room. And I think this is where Cozy can really come in handy. Go and relax on the sofa, maybe even eat your meal at a lovely, beautiful cozy table. Linger a little bit, move through with coffees and dessert to a lovely couch. But I know what you're like, James. You're a mucky pup.

• 29:02Speaker 01

  I'm gonna spill stuff everywhere. Is that gonna ruin the Cozy furniture?

• 29:05Speaker 00

  No, don't worry about that, James, because it's highly washable, James. It's sauce, wine, sparkling water, dessert crumbs. You telling one of your big stories and sloshing a coffee everywhere, don't worry, you can pop it in the wash.

• 29:17Speaker 01

  Oh, so you're saying Cozy makes every day at home feel like my best day?

• 29:20Speaker 00

  Absolutely, that's exactly what I'm saying. And with Cozy, your home can grow with you, adapting to new spaces, new styles and every era of your life, James. I think it's so hard, especially when you move somewhere new, to immediately make that place feel like yours, that it's been put together well. And that's where Cozy comes in.

• 29:37Speaker 01

  And because it's cozy, the furniture isn't just good looking, but actually practical. Modular pieces, easy assembly, washable and interchangeable covers and free design consultations, if you want help making the whole room work.

• 29:49Speaker 00

  And it's easy to order, ship and assemble and maintain, James. The only way is the Cozy way.

• 29:55Speaker 01

  Visit Cozy today, that's C O Z E Y dot com and make yourself at home.

• 30:03Speaker 01

  Your dream starter.

• 30:05Speaker 02

  Well, I forgot to ask you for a very special wish at the beginning.

• 30:08Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 30:09Speaker 02

  If you may grant me one.

• 30:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 30:11Speaker 02

  Is I get full really quickly, but I love food. And it's all I ever think about. It's all I ever wanna do is eat. So I get really excited about having huge meals and I get, I have grand plans of doing bang bangs. You know, like when you eat one meal after another.

• 30:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:25Speaker 02

  But then I just get full really quickly. So please grant me. The the power to just never get full.

• 30:31Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 30:31Speaker 01

  Absolutely.

• 30:32Speaker 02

  But no, actually, grant me the power to never get full, but then at the end to feel like perfectly satisfied.

• 30:37Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 30:37Speaker 02

  Do you know what I mean?

• 30:38Speaker 00

  That's good, because you nearly, it's like someone wishing for, you know, immortality.

• 30:43Speaker 02

  No, I don't want that.

• 30:44Speaker 00

  That's a curse.

• 30:44Speaker 02

  No.

• 30:44Speaker 00

  Never getting full is a curse.

• 30:45Speaker 02

  I do not want to be alive forever, and I don't want to be not full forever. Yeah, you're right.

• 30:50Speaker 01

  You've never been so serious about anything on the podcast. You look to me, that's a curse.

• 30:54Speaker 02

  That is a curse.

• 30:56Speaker 01

  Talk about if you were immortal, you would be.

• 30:59Speaker 00

  It would be.

• 30:59Speaker 02

  I would hate to live forever.

• 31:02Speaker 00

  Because immortality, that's, people often get tripped up on that when they wish for it. Because they're not, they they think they're wishing for eternal youth.

• 31:09Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 31:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:10Speaker 00

  They're not, they're wishing for immortality, so one day they're going to be 200 with all their fingers falling off.

• 31:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 31:15Speaker 02

  It is a curse.

• 31:16Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:16Speaker 01

  Exactly.

• 31:17Speaker 00

  That's a curse.

• 31:17Speaker 01

  Good point, Ed.

• 31:18Speaker 02

  Really good point.

• 31:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm like, your your food thing about like, you what a massive meal, and then you get full really quick. That's like me with a bath.

• 31:26Speaker 02

  Yes, me too.

• 31:28Speaker 00

  You drink the whole bath.

• 31:29Speaker 02

  Then I'm like, I'm so full of bath.

• 31:31Speaker 01

  I just wanted a little sip.

• 31:34Speaker 01

  Nah, it's like, can't wait to have a lovely bath when I get home, fill the bath really full, really hot, I get in, five seconds, oh, this is horrible.

• 31:42Speaker 00

  Bored.

• 31:42Speaker 02

  I am a hundred percent exactly the same. I love the idea of it, and I get in, I'm like, just hot and bothered, I'm like.

• 31:47Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:48Speaker 02

  Bit of a waste of water, but anyway, yeah, so, great appetite throughout.

• 31:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:52Speaker 02

  Perfect satisfaction at the end, so that's my one wish, I may ask for.

• 31:56Speaker 01

  You want to live forever?

• 31:57Speaker 02

  No, that is a curse.

• 31:59Speaker 00

  That's good.

• 31:59Speaker 01

  Okay, sorry, get my wires crossed.

• 32:02Speaker 02

  My dream starter is many things, if that's okay. We're going to go for a Mexican feast as a dream starter, but like starter things, so.

• 32:12Speaker 00

  A platter.

• 32:13Speaker 02

  So, yes, maybe a platter.

• 32:15Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 32:16Speaker 02

  But it's gonna be more than a platter, it's gonna be many platters.

• 32:19Speaker 00

  Okay, okay.

• 32:19Speaker 02

  So.

• 32:21Speaker 02

  I actually was recently, this, earlier this year, I was a guest judge on MasterChef Australia. And.

• 32:27Speaker 01

  Best MasterChef?

• 32:28Speaker 02

  It is actually pretty good.

• 32:29Speaker 01

  It's mad.

• 32:29Speaker 02

  High stakes.

• 32:31Speaker 01

  Love it.

• 32:31Speaker 00

  I've just been to Australia and ended up talking about their MasterChef on stage, going, you guys are mental.

• 32:36Speaker 02

  They are mental. It is insane. There's so much going on.

• 32:39Speaker 00

  They start with like 8,000 contestants. It goes on for about a year. There's people, there's contestants dying of old age halfway through the series.

• 32:46Speaker 02

  It's true. It's true.

• 32:49Speaker 00

  It's a curse. You've wished for unlimited MasterChef.

• 32:52Speaker 02

  Actually, the one, the, the one that I was guest judge on was a series called Back to Win, which was basically people that had already been on. Who hadn't won, who were back, so like trying.

• 33:02Speaker 00

  Nice.

• 33:02Speaker 02

  So anyway, it was the mystery box challenge. So I don't know if you know what that is, but like, I got to pick like 10 of my favorite ingredients and then they, 17 of them had to cook dishes based on my favorite ingredients. It was a bit of like.

• 33:15Speaker 00

  It's a bit like Ready, Steady, Cook.

• 33:16Speaker 02

  Yeah, but I feel like I had so much power. It's like, here's everything I love. All of you go make something for me. And it was, it was very fucking exciting. But anyway, long story short, there was a guy called Jamie, I forgot his surname, but he made one of the best tostadas I've ever had. So the actual tortilla itself, he made with like toasted masa, um, like the Nick Semilized corn flour. So it was like really roasty, toasty, corny. And then he fried it. And then when it came out with the fryer, he then like tossed it in more of that like roasty, toasty corn. So fuck. So first of all, like the actual tostada was like sensational. And then it was like raw bonito, like tuna. What?

• 33:54Speaker 01

  Raw bonito?

• 33:54Speaker 02

  Not bonito.

• 33:57Speaker 01

  I thought you were telling him to roar like a lion.

• 34:00Speaker 00

  Raw bonito?

• 34:02Speaker 01

  I'd love to see him roar.

• 34:06Speaker 00

  Instead of the MGM lion.

• 34:07Speaker 01

  He wouldn't be able to do it. It'd be like when Simba's a little cub and he's trying to do it.

• 34:11Speaker 00

  He's never gonna roar.

• 34:13Speaker 01

  He won't ever roar.

• 34:14Speaker 02

  And like the fish?

• 34:15Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 34:15Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 34:16Speaker 02

  It's like a tuna.

• 34:16Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 34:17Speaker 02

  I think it's a tuna. Is it a tuna? Something like that. Anyway.

• 34:21Speaker 00

  They're smaller than.

• 34:22Speaker 02

  Smaller.

• 34:22Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 34:23Speaker 02

  But equally delicious.

• 34:24Speaker 00

  I've caught, I've caught one before.

• 34:26Speaker 02

  You know, all right. You caught a great bonito.

• 34:29Speaker 01

  How have we never talked about this on the podcast?

• 34:31Speaker 00

  Caught a bonito.

• 34:32Speaker 01

  It's absolutely crazy.

• 34:34Speaker 02

  Go on, tell us more.

• 34:34Speaker 00

  Cooked it up later. It was fucking disgusting.

• 34:36Speaker 02

  Ah, no.

• 34:38Speaker 00

  They're very bony. They've got very like, very thin, thin bones.

• 34:42Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. So you didn't remove those.

• 34:43Speaker 00

  No, no, no.

• 34:44Speaker 01

  So it was him?

• 34:47Speaker 01

  He's got thin bones.

• 34:48Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 34:48Speaker 01

  You caught him.

• 34:49Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 34:49Speaker 02

  Thin bones and no sombrero to be seen.

• 34:51Speaker 01

  Tasted disgusted, did he said to it, to the producer podcast?

• 34:56Speaker 01

  Because I don't want to finish you. I don't want to eat you.

• 34:58Speaker 00

  Old thin bones. Sorry, you've already said this is a many platters of Mexican food.

• 35:03Speaker 02

  Yeah, we haven't even.

• 35:04Speaker 00

  And we're on the starter and now I can see why you're trying to move us on from the cat food.

• 35:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 35:08Speaker 00

  Because this is a long menu.

• 35:09Speaker 01

  You knew what you had coming out the bed. We didn't.

• 35:12Speaker 02

  Raw Bonito.

• 35:13Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 35:13Speaker 00

  Raw Bonito.

• 35:14Speaker 02

  But really quickly, like, um, not, not poached. What's it called? Oh my God, what is wrong with me? You know, when you just like put some lime on it.

• 35:21Speaker 01

  Are you even a chef?

• 35:22Speaker 02

  I don't think.

• 35:22Speaker 00

  Cured?

• 35:23Speaker 02

  Not cured, but like.

• 35:24Speaker 00

  Like Cheeto?

• 35:25Speaker 02

  Cured, yeah.

• 35:26Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 35:26Speaker 02

  But like really quickly. So it was still like quite raw. Um, and then there was like a pineapple and scotch on it and pickled onion, hibiscus situation going on. And then like grilled pieces of okra.

• 35:39Speaker 01

  Oh my God.

• 35:39Speaker 02

  It was insane, honestly. I've had my fair share of tacos and tostadas. I've been to Mexico. I have family in Mexico. Like this was honestly life changing.

• 35:50Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 35:50Speaker 00

  Amazing.

• 35:51Speaker 02

  So that's going to be on the table.

• 35:53Speaker 01

  Jamie Fleming.

• 35:55Speaker 02

  How did you do that?

• 35:56Speaker 01

  He's very good. He, he Googled stuff with little weak boned hands, tapping away at the keys.

• 36:01Speaker 00

  He snaps, he snaps a finger every time he Googles something.

• 36:03Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's a curse.

• 36:04Speaker 02

  Jamie Fling. Anyway, shout out JB.

• 36:07Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:07Speaker 02

  Best tostada I've ever had. So that's going to be on the table. We're also going to have like a platter of al pastor tacos. So pile of beautiful soft tortillas, a whole spit of pork, grilled pineapple, all the salsas. Definitely a habanero salsa, a salsa matcha, some just like chopped onions and lime. That's going to be on there as well.

• 36:29Speaker 00

  Is that from anywhere specific?

• 36:31Speaker 02

  Well, I don't remember the name, but there's a place in the outskirts of Mexico City. It's kind of just looks like a car park and you kind of, you can just drive off and people just eat on like the hoods of their cars. Can't remember what it's called though. I wonder if the great Bonito can find it.

• 36:44Speaker 01

  But you can find it.

• 36:45Speaker 00

  See, that sounds like.

• 36:45Speaker 02

  Car park.

• 36:46Speaker 00

  Car park meat.

• 36:47Speaker 02

  Taco, Mexico City.

• 36:48Speaker 00

  That sounds so good.

• 36:49Speaker 02

  Al pastor, Mexico City car park.

• 36:51Speaker 00

  When you hear about somewhere like that in Mexico, like in a car park, everyone's eating off the hood of their cars. And it's like, you're thinking that sounds so great. It's sort of a romance to it. Imagine if that was in England.

• 37:01Speaker 02

  Oh, that would be horrendous.

• 37:01Speaker 00

  I wouldn't go near that place.

• 37:02Speaker 02

  Absolutely not.

• 37:05Speaker 00

  Must be joking.

• 37:05Speaker 02

  Garage pork.

• 37:06Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 37:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, we wouldn't, we wouldn't pull it off.

• 37:09Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 37:09Speaker 01

  Bad.

• 37:10Speaker 00

  Eating a sausage on a Ford Focus.

• 37:14Speaker 01

  Awful.

• 37:14Speaker 02

  That bit.

• 37:15Speaker 01

  He's found it.

• 37:16Speaker 02

  Absolute genius.

• 37:17Speaker 01

  He's found it.

• 37:17Speaker 02

  El Bucito, that is it.

• 37:18Speaker 01

  Another finger shattered.

• 37:20Speaker 02

  So good.

• 37:21Speaker 01

  Straight to A and E after this.

• 37:25Speaker 02

  Oh my god. So yeah, tacos al pastor from there. What else are we gonna have? Oh, the pork tamales from actually an Ecuadorian restaurant in London. If you haven't been, you must go. It's called El Incaple Beo. It's on Essex Road.

• 37:37Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 37:38Speaker 02

  Really good. And they do pork tamales like wrapped in corn husks and with just like the most soft succulent pork stuffed inside. And it's just unbelievable. And it comes with like a green and coriander salsa with lime. And it's just sensational. So that's gonna be there too. And then also like a really good guacamole, like the best one you've ever had with like warm plantain, sweet potato and cassava crisps.

• 38:03Speaker 01

  Oh my god, yeah.

• 38:04Speaker 02

  And that's it. No, no, no. And and the perfect margarita, mezcalita, actually. I'm quite specific about my.

• 38:09Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:10Speaker 02

  Margaritas. Short glass again.

• 38:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:12Speaker 02

  On the rocks. Hate margaritas in the, what are they called?

• 38:16Speaker 01

  Big cup.

• 38:17Speaker 02

  Big cups.

• 38:18Speaker 01

  I know what you mean.

• 38:19Speaker 02

  You know, like when they bring it to you and it's not, it's not on the rocks and it's in a.

• 38:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:24Speaker 02

  Like a margarita glass.

• 38:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:25Speaker 02

  You know?

• 38:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 38:28Speaker 02

  So short glass on the rocks, mezcal, like a bit smoky. I really don't like it too sweet. So I actually prefer it with a bit of honey rather than agave. But like hardly any and absolutely no Cointreau or triple sec. I hate Cointreau and triple sec. I'm saying a lot of hate anyway. And a bit of spice.

• 38:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:46Speaker 02

  So that's my starter. I know it's a lot, but I've got the power.

• 38:49Speaker 01

  No, I respect it.

• 38:50Speaker 02

  I've got the power to not be full.

• 38:52Speaker 01

  It's very specific. It all sounds delicious. Um, are you having one of each of them? And then you're sharing all this with a bunch of other people?

• 38:58Speaker 02

  Yeah, I think you have to share this kind of food. I don't want to be sitting by myself in a car park.

• 39:02Speaker 01

  Are the liver lovers there?

• 39:04Speaker 02

  The livers, yeah, I do love the liver lovers, they're there.

• 39:07Speaker 00

  But no liver yet.

• 39:08Speaker 01

  Oh, they had that.

• 39:09Speaker 00

  In the starter, we had it for the bread.

• 39:11Speaker 02

  The bread, yeah, yeah.

• 39:12Speaker 00

  Nothing knocking around in the.

• 39:13Speaker 02

  No liver here. No, I don't need liver here. Oh, I forgot. I also want a really good ceviche on the table.

• 39:19Speaker 00

  Liver ceviche?

• 39:21Speaker 02

  Nope, definitely not. Definitely not a liver ceviche. That would be horrible.

• 39:25Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 39:25Speaker 02

  Even for a liver lover like me.

• 39:28Speaker 00

  What, uh, what ceviche do you want?

• 39:30Speaker 02

  I do like a, just like a, a bream ceviche, that kind of thing, or any sort of like, whatever is like the local fresh seasonal fish of the moment from the sea, right there. So wherever I am, a freshly caught fish. I like it like when it's just like to- tossed. What am I talking about? What is it called when you put it in the lime juice? It's not cure. What is wrong with me?

• 39:52Speaker 01

  I actually know what it's called, so I'm.

• 39:54Speaker 00

  Yeah, I've run out of ideas after they're cured.

• 39:56Speaker 02

  Maybe it's just cured. But I thought cured with the salt, really, I, marinated, there we go, we could just say marinated in lime juice, but really quickly, like not too long. Onions, tomatoes, coriander, lime, like chilies. I want it pretty simple, like a, a simple, really fresh, limey, salty ceviche with all of those crisps. The cassava, sweet potato and plantain. And the guacamole. And it's like, it's hot, but it's not too hot, probably on a beach. The water's lapping in, bare feet, water's lapping in, but the sand is not bothering you. Like the sand is there, but it's not getting in your crack or like pissing you off.

• 40:35Speaker 00

  That would be, that would be an issue. Even when you, to be honest, even when you said bare feet and the water's lapping, I thought that's gonna get on my nerves.

• 40:42Speaker 01

  You won't like that.

• 40:43Speaker 02

  Do you think? Would that get on your nerves?

• 40:43Speaker 00

  Personally, yeah, yeah.

• 40:45Speaker 02

  Oh, have you ever done that? Like, table on the beach, not so close that it's like waves, but like just like a little, every now and then it's a.

• 40:53Speaker 00

  Yeah, but even just being on the beach on a table, I'd be like, ugh, no.

• 40:56Speaker 02

  No, I do not like that.

• 40:57Speaker 00

  And it gotta be under.

• 40:58Speaker 02

  No, but.

• 40:58Speaker 01

  Well, the legs like stinking to, sinking to the sand.

• 41:01Speaker 02

  Hmm, not, I mean, you have, it has to be like a bit further away from, have you never eaten on the beach?

• 41:08Speaker 00

  No, no. Yeah, I have eaten on the beach, but.

• 41:09Speaker 01

  A table on the beach having a proper meal.

• 41:11Speaker 02

  Sink. I mean, you could, you definitely could, but.

• 41:14Speaker 01

  Probably eating an ice cream on the beach.

• 41:17Speaker 02

  I think once in your lifetime, James, you should eat at a table on the beach with the water lapping around your bare feet.

• 41:23Speaker 01

  But you're talking about it like it's a common experience.

• 41:25Speaker 02

  Well, it's not, no, it's definitely not a common experience, but can I ask for one more wish?

• 41:29Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 41:30Speaker 02

  Yes, so we're on the beach. It's really hot, but it's not too hot. It's like the perfect level of heat. The water's lapping, but it's not annoying. The sand is there, but you can't, it's not, it's not annoying.

• 41:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 41:42Speaker 02

  And also your arse isn't sticking to the plastic chairs.

• 41:44Speaker 01

  Oh, okay.

• 41:45Speaker 02

  So it's just all perfect.

• 41:47Speaker 01

  The wish that your arse doesn't stick to the plastic.

• 41:48Speaker 02

  The reality is when you do eat on the beach, all those things like sand is getting in your toes and your cracks, your arse is sticking to the plastic, it's too hot and the water's probably pissing you off.

• 41:58Speaker 00

  Do you think that's the first time anyone's ever asked a genie for the wish of I wish my arse didn't stick to plastic chairs?

• 42:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, surely.

• 42:05Speaker 02

  Probably.

• 42:06Speaker 01

  Surely most genies aren't getting that one.

• 42:08Speaker 02

  Oh, my God, I only get one more wish. I just realised.

• 42:12Speaker 01

  Maybe.

• 42:13Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 42:14Speaker 02

  Is that, that's how it works, right? Three wishes?

• 42:16Speaker 01

  Well, maybe your other wish should be that no one gets washed off a rock during this meal, because you're really.

• 42:22Speaker 02

  Or if they do get washed off a rock, they will find themselves on a deserted island and be rescued.

• 42:26Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 42:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, because I think you're skating a bit close to the.

• 42:29Speaker 00

  You could also, because it's your dream meal, not be sat on a plastic chair.

• 42:34Speaker 02

  That is so smart. I didn't think about that loophole. That is really smart. You're clever.

• 42:38Speaker 00

  Yeah, no, I'm a clever guy.

• 42:39Speaker 02

  Yeah. Now, what is the most comfortable chair to sit on that's not sticky?

• 42:43Speaker 00

  See, this is the problem with sitting on the, sitting on the beach, isn't it? If it's warm, most chairs, there's going to be some stickage.

• 42:49Speaker 02

  But you're right that I don't, I could just ask for not a plastic chair. Maybe just a nice wooden chair.

• 42:53Speaker 00

  Wooden chair.

• 42:54Speaker 02

  No slats.

• 42:55Speaker 00

  Wooden chair, no slats.

• 42:56Speaker 01

  Little cushion, right?

• 42:57Speaker 02

  No, not on the beach. It'll get wet and sandy. No, it won't because of my wish.

• 43:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 43:01Speaker 02

  So, yeah, maybe a wooden chair with a cushion.

• 43:03Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 43:04Speaker 02

  Perfect.

• 43:11Speaker 02

  My dream main course. Can I have a pasta course, please?

• 43:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 43:14Speaker 02

  Thank you. Uh, is my dream meal?

• 43:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 43:19Speaker 02

  So my favourite pasta in the world is a pasta called Pinnyalakoneze. So it's made in the village above where I used to live as a kid. And they've been making this pasta recipe for like 50 years, I think. It's a secret recipe and people from all around the area always come for lunch and dinner there. It's like a site of pilgrimage. It's honestly the most delicious pasta sauce. In the world, it's kind of like creamy, tomatoey, peppery, porky, porcini-y. And like, it's all of those things, but it's also like so much more. I don't know, I can't, it's like, it's a secret recipe that people are obsessed with. Like, people who live around there will literally go there for dinner like twice a week for like fifty years.

• 43:59Speaker 00

  Really? So they just like have it all the time?

• 44:01Speaker 02

  It's so good. You, everyone always starts their meal with, well, they'll get like crostini or like antipasti first. Then they'll get Pinella Conizze because you always have a pasta course. And then you go on and then you're like, either have a second course or a pizza. Like Italians are mental. I don't know how they eat that much and like still look so good.

• 44:17Speaker 00

  It's olivo. Seen the adverts? They eat loads of olivo and that's why they.

• 44:21Speaker 02

  What, olive oil?

• 44:21Speaker 00

  No, no, no, the spread, the butter replacement spread.

• 44:24Speaker 02

  That's not good.

• 44:25Speaker 01

  Have they got olive oil in it?

• 44:26Speaker 02

  Italians don't eat butter.

• 44:27Speaker 00

  They do, that's why. Have you seen the advert?

• 44:30Speaker 02

  That is not the secret to their longevity. I'm telling you that margarine.

• 44:34Speaker 00

  They're not allowed to lie on adverts.

• 44:36Speaker 02

  Oh, is that so?

• 44:37Speaker 00

  They eat loads of olivo and that's why they look so good.

• 44:39Speaker 01

  Replacement spread.

• 44:41Speaker 00

  I look so good.

• 44:42Speaker 02

  Well, there you go. That's the secret.

• 44:43Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 44:44Speaker 02

  Maybe we should all start plastering that on our skin if we wanna.

• 44:46Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 44:47Speaker 02

  Live forever. Although that is a curse.

• 44:49Speaker 00

  Yeah, that is a curse.

• 44:50Speaker 01

  That's a curse.

• 44:51Speaker 00

  You turn into a puppet.

• 44:52Speaker 02

  Yeah. Anyway, so I want that pasta.

• 44:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, that sounds great. And there's like, there's like lumps of meat in it.

• 44:58Speaker 02

  It's like tiny, it's not like a ragu with like mincy pieces. It's like the tiniest like speckles of pork. And like the sauce is like luscious and velvety. And it just like coats the penne in the most, it's insane. Like it's the best pasta I've ever had. I've had it, I've been having it all my life, like since I was two. And it's always the same, which means it's always perfect. And it's just, it's life changing.

• 45:23Speaker 00

  How often do you get to have it now?

• 45:25Speaker 02

  These, I had it a couple of months ago on my birthday, which was very nice. Thank you. It was in April, but I appreciate that. And then before that, oh no, actually I've had it three years in a row. For the last three years, but then before that I hadn't been back for a few years. So like, once every few years I have it.

• 45:41Speaker 01

  So it's even better now because you get into, it's spaced out. You're not having it all the time.

• 45:45Speaker 02

  Yeah. You know, it's so good. It's a tiny little village. And it's so good that as you enter the village, there's a big sign that says Paese Natale di Pinella Conizze, which means like birth place of Pinella Conizze. Like it has a, anyway.

• 46:00Speaker 00

  So at least you know they're never going to change the menu.

• 46:01Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, they never will.

• 46:03Speaker 00

  Because they can't change the sign.

• 46:04Speaker 02

  They'll never tell anyone the secret.

• 46:05Speaker 00

  Have you ever tried to recreate it at home?

• 46:07Speaker 02

  I have, but like versions of it. I'm I've never like tried to like get it exactly right because that's pointless. It's perfect and I'm never gonna be able to. But like it has inspired various recipes I've done.

• 46:19Speaker 01

  So your actual main course then?

• 46:20Speaker 02

  Oh, this was honestly one of the hard. This whole exercise has been one of the hardest. Thing like it's like Sophie's Choice.

• 46:27Speaker 01

  Well, you're nailing it so far.

• 46:28Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 46:29Speaker 01

  It all sounds delicious.

• 46:29Speaker 00

  And also what you've done is not really, you've just sort of said everything.

• 46:33Speaker 02

  Yeah, but I actually, ye- yes, but also I have gone in one direction for my mains, but then I would like to talk about other options.

• 46:39Speaker 00

  Sure, sure, sure, sure.

• 46:40Speaker 02

  Okay, fine. Right. So we're gonna stick in Tuscany for the mains.

• 46:43Speaker 00

  Lovely.

• 46:44Speaker 02

  And I'm just gonna, I think I'm gonna have like a rabbit porcetta.

• 46:47Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 46:48Speaker 02

  Have you ever had one of those?

• 46:49Speaker 00

  Never. Didn't even know that was, I mean, obviously I knew it was possible because you can put two things together, but that just sounds absolutely incredible.

• 46:55Speaker 02

  It is. I mean, it's not a rabbit and a porcetta put together. So like porcetta is obviously like rolled pork. But you can also, even though that word is used to describe pork, you can also use it to describe a rabbit roll. So it's basically like a whole deboned rabbit. And they usually like stuff it with like sage, sometimes with chicken liver, loads of garlic, anchovies, pepper, lemon or olive oil, that kind of thing. And then roll it up kind of like a porcetta. And then like slow roast it and just like, oh my god. And it's like crispy and crackly around the edge and just like super moist and I mean, I love a porcetta. It's one of my favorite things in the world, but I feel like a rabbit porcetta is just like just slightly.

• 47:38Speaker 00

  How well does a rabbit roll? I was, I was, I was struggling to imagine. Cause like with a big bit of pork, like you can have a big square bit, right? But if you're deboning a whole rabbit, does it look like a sort of rabbit rug?

• 47:51Speaker 02

  Okay, I'm gonna be honest, since I've never actually done it myself, I have seen it get, so imagine, people aren't gonna wanna imagine this. People don't wanna imagine.

• 47:58Speaker 00

  That they're gonna have to live with it.

• 47:59Speaker 01

  People can skip this bit if they don't wanna hear it.

• 48:02Speaker 02

  Trigger warning, skip this bit if you don't wanna hear about raw rabbit carpets.

• 48:07Speaker 01

  Raw rabbit. You've said it now.

• 48:10Speaker 01

  I felt that was too descriptive for trigger warning.

• 48:13Speaker 00

  Yeah, I don't think it can get much worse than that, really.

• 48:16Speaker 01

  Yeah. If you are triggered by that stuff, too late.

• 48:19Speaker 02

  It's too late. Probably should be listening to this podcast because you never know what you're gonna hear.

• 48:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, exactly.

• 48:25Speaker 00

  I'm now just imagining.

• 48:26Speaker 01

  More gruesome stuff on here.

• 48:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:28Speaker 00

  I'm just imagining now Benito and a rabbit in a roar off.

• 48:31Speaker 02

  Oh, that would be cute. But rabbits don't roar.

• 48:34Speaker 00

  Well, neither does Benito.

• 48:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think it'd still be Benito in a roar off.

• 48:40Speaker 02

  So imagine a deboned rabbit.

• 48:43Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 48:44Speaker 02

  Let's say he's lying that way with his sort of head in his feet that way, then you kind of wanna, you would roll him not like this, but like that. Does that make sense?

• 48:52Speaker 00

  Head down.

• 48:52Speaker 01

  No.

• 48:53Speaker 02

  No?

• 48:53Speaker 00

  Head.

• 48:54Speaker 02

  So kind of it would, it wouldn't be really long. It would be shorter. It would only be end up being, so like if you de-boned rabbit, it'd probably be like that long.

• 49:01Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 49:01Speaker 02

  If it was like a decent sized rabbit. But then you would kind of roll it the other way.

• 49:06Speaker 00

  From the bum to the head.

• 49:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 49:07Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 49:08Speaker 02

  So then it would only end up being about that long.

• 49:10Speaker 00

  Yes, got you. Okay.

• 49:11Speaker 02

  It wouldn't be like, you could do it that way.

• 49:13Speaker 00

  But you want the layers in there rather than that.

• 49:14Speaker 02

  Exactly. You want, you want the rabbit roll, as you said, yes. There's actually, did you guys watch the, what's it, the Stanley Tucci Italy show that just came out?

• 49:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 49:24Speaker 02

  In one of the episodes, he goes to like the home of where like a colonato, where they make lardo. Did you watch that episode?

• 49:30Speaker 00

  No.

• 49:31Speaker 01

  No.

• 49:31Speaker 02

  No. Anyway, this, he visits this lady who teaches him how to make this famous dish from that colonato region. And it's rabbit, a de-boned rabbit layered with loads of lardo, which they just like get out of this like beautiful like stone marble, not, not stone, salt, salt marble. You know, where they cure it. So de-boned rabbit, layers of lardo and then just rolled up and apparently the lardo just like melts into the rabbit. And just like makes it the most moist, crackly, delicious thing. So maybe I'll put some lardo in there.

• 50:06Speaker 00

  Yeah, stick a bit of lardo in there for God's sake.

• 50:08Speaker 01

  Why not? Cut to the two dogs.

• 50:12Speaker 02

  So a rabbit porcetta, a really good salsa verde. A really good aioli, which is not something you would usually have with a rabbit porcetta in Tuscany. But I make the rules here. So I'm gonna have, I'm also gonna have a peppercorn sauce with it because again, I make the rules. I like sauces, love peppercorn sauce more than life itself. I don't like them too creamy. I actually make them with like egg yolks and ghee, which sounds a bit gross, but without cream. And it's like fucking good. It's like a, kind of like a, I actually, it's kind of like a high protein version.

• 50:47Speaker 02

  Not that I'm trying to do high protein recipes.

• 50:49Speaker 00

  Finally, someone's made a high protein peppercorn sauce.

• 50:52Speaker 02

  Not that I'm trying to achieve that.

• 50:53Speaker 00

  Finally, a sauce that will let me keep my gains.

• 50:58Speaker 01

  Pour that all over a steak.

• 50:59Speaker 02

  Peppercorn sauce for bros.

• 51:02Speaker 02

  But it's actually a really good recipe and it's super easy. Like you just put like some melted ghee, a couple of egg yolks, lots of different peppercorns. Cause I like, you know, mixed peppercorns, a bit of mustard, salt. I like to put like a bit of black garlic in there as well, a bit of curry powder. And then just use an immersion blender and like within seconds, you have this beautiful, like emulsified delicious sauce. That doesn't have double cream in it.

• 51:31Speaker 01

  Dream site.

• 51:32Speaker 02

  Dream site. So Tuscan roast potatoes, like I really don't like English style roast potatoes.

• 51:37Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 51:38Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 51:39Speaker 01

  Here we go. You better turn off your mentions for about a week.

• 51:42Speaker 02

  Ah, I know, I know.

• 51:43Speaker 00

  This will be the clip we put out because it'll get a lot of engagement.

• 51:46Speaker 02

  This is, this is where people will be asking me, who the hell do you think you are? More so than the prawns.

• 51:53Speaker 00

  There's one clip we have that still gets loads of engagement and is Ellie Taylor saying that she doesn't go to Italian restaurants. Cause she can do it better at home and it is, it is constant comment.

• 52:04Speaker 02

  That is sacrilegious.

• 52:05Speaker 01

  I know that.

• 52:06Speaker 02

  Does she really think that?

• 52:08Speaker 00

  Yeah, I think so.

• 52:08Speaker 02

  Is she being genuine?

• 52:09Speaker 00

  But there's so many Italian people in the comments now. They are absolutely.

• 52:12Speaker 02

  Fair enough.

• 52:13Speaker 00

  They go, just because something says it's an Italian restaurant, it doesn't mean it's properly Italian.

• 52:17Speaker 01

  Great.

• 52:18Speaker 02

  True.

• 52:18Speaker 00

  One person said, the amount of people who haven't had proper Italian food is genuinely scary.

• 52:25Speaker 02

  Genuinely scary.

• 52:26Speaker 01

  See, sometimes it's worth reading the comments, they're funny.

• 52:29Speaker 02

  Do you ever, you don't have Instagram, do you? Do you ever read the comments?

• 52:33Speaker 01

  Well, now, now we're on YouTube, I can see the comments.

• 52:35Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 52:36Speaker 01

  Really funny.

• 52:38Speaker 02

  Really funny.

• 52:39Speaker 01

  Well, someone straight away was just saying, like, just complaining to Benito about the quality of the picture.

• 52:45Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 52:45Speaker 01

  And can you please fix this, please?

• 52:47Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 52:47Speaker 02

  Really?

• 52:47Speaker 01

  Uh, and I'm very disappointed and, and.

• 52:49Speaker 02

  Disappointed, don't tell me they use that word.

• 52:51Speaker 01

  Very funny.

• 52:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 52:52Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, no, they were very, they were like, I feel like I have to raise this.

• 52:55Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 52:56Speaker 02

  I mean, I know people say this all the time, but honestly, people have so much time on their hands that they can just like, spend time commenting, telling you that they're disappointed in the quality.

• 53:05Speaker 01

  But you should be doing a better job, though. You should be doing a better job.

• 53:07Speaker 02

  He's doing a lot of things.

• 53:09Speaker 00

  No, man, it's good quality. All I can, I can assume we have blurry faces because it is crisp quality. So you don't like, so talk us through why you don't like English, our beautiful English roast potatoes.

• 53:18Speaker 01

  That we eat in our car park across the world.

• 53:21Speaker 02

  Garage potatoes.

• 53:23Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 53:23Speaker 02

  Um.

• 53:24Speaker 00

  Please tell me why you hated Her Majesty the Queen.

• 53:26Speaker 01

  Yes, maybe she left.

• 53:27Speaker 02

  She was only okay.

• 53:29Speaker 00

  Fair enough.

• 53:29Speaker 02

  English style roast potato, I just don't get what all the fuss is about. There's so much like, yeah, it's crispy on the outside sometimes. Usually they're just a bit flaccid, like not that crispy.

• 53:38Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 53:39Speaker 02

  Um, so much fat, you have to like, almost like scold yourself, like, but like, get a vat of like burning fat and make sure it's like, and then like, yeah, it's kind of crispy, it's not that flavoursome. And then there's just like so much fluff inside. Now, if you think about a Tuscan style roast potato, do you know what I mean when I say like a, like they're like smaller skin on like squares? I wouldn't say waxy, but like really garlicy, really rosemary, super salty and just like, golden brown, olive oily, like there's so much smaller, so there's so much more surface area to get, you know, roastey, toasty, crispy, caramelized. And there's so much garlic and rosemary in there and like a bit of lemon on top.

• 54:21Speaker 01

  It does sound good.

• 54:22Speaker 02

  English style roast potatoes are just like. Whatever.

• 54:26Speaker 00

  I will never, I will never slag off the English roast potato. I think it's a wonderful thing. I will say sometimes people take it too far.

• 54:33Speaker 02

  Mm hmm.

• 54:33Speaker 00

  Did go somewhere the other day for lunch. It was a very lovely lunch. They brought the roast potatoes. And if you chucked one of those roast potatoes at the window, you would have been done for criminal damage.

• 54:41Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 54:42Speaker 00

  Because it was like, you couldn't get into it.

• 54:44Speaker 02

  That's the thing. Most of the time they're either like, kind of sort of flaccid and the crispy bit has gone a bit like, not soggy, but just like, or they're like, so hard that you can't even cut into them.

• 54:54Speaker 01

  We're all chasing that memory of the best one we had.

• 54:57Speaker 02

  Well, I'm chasing a memory of the best Italian style roast potato.

• 55:00Speaker 01

  Sure, but we just make them at home.

• 55:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, but that's the thing. But that's the thing. You can just make them at home. They're so easy. You don't need to, parboil, peel them, parboil them, fluff them, like burn your arms with scalding fat.

• 55:15Speaker 00

  Listen, yeah, this is why we won the war. You know, we just keep our heads down.

• 55:19Speaker 02

  We don't need to bring that up.

• 55:21Speaker 01

  Not an episode goes by doesn't bring up the war.

• 55:24Speaker 02

  Not the bloody war.

• 55:25Speaker 01

  Sorry.

• 55:26Speaker 00

  No, I know. It is, it is a lot. It's a lot of faff, but I like the pouring them into the hot fat and they're sizzling everywhere.

• 55:33Speaker 02

  Yeah, fair enough.

• 55:34Speaker 00

  Is it a case of if you're in a, if you're in a kitchen quite a lot, working, you don't necessarily want, when you're at home making roast potatoes to?

• 55:41Speaker 02

  A hundred percent. I am very like, I cook so much that when there's a shortcut or when there's a quicker way of doing something, I'm a hundred percent gonna take it. I love a food processor. I don't wanna peel things. I don't wanna pre boil. I hardly ever parboil. Parboiling is so boring. Like, come on. When like shortcuts, if it still tastes great, a hundred percent for them.

• 56:02Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 56:02Speaker 02

  Mm hmm. And you just literally just chop them up. I mean, wash them a little bit. That's it. That's all you need to do. Skin on, chop them up. Loads of olive oil, really hot oven. Bob's your uncle. Or Roberto is your uncle.

• 56:14Speaker 01

  Yeah. Respect.

• 56:16Speaker 02

  Respect or about it.

• 56:18Speaker 01

  So those potatoes, I know that's not the last of your sides, because I know you've got a few.

• 56:21Speaker 02

  No, I want a really good tomato salad, just quite simple, just really like the best tomato you've ever had, or I've ever had.

• 56:29Speaker 01

  You don't want the best one we've ever had.

• 56:30Speaker 00

  You don't trust us?

• 56:32Speaker 01

  The best one we've ever had would be rubbish.

• 56:34Speaker 02

  No, no, no, I do trust. I bet you guys know a good tomato.

• 56:38Speaker 00

  I know a good tomato. I would say I very rarely had a good tomato. So you're probably right to go with the best one you've had.

• 56:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 56:43Speaker 02

  No, the best one we've ever had.

• 56:45Speaker 00

  So like the average.

• 56:46Speaker 02

  Combined.

• 56:46Speaker 00

  Combine the average best one.

• 56:47Speaker 02

  Combine the average, that would probably be a pretty good one.

• 56:49Speaker 01

  It will be the best one you've ever had, I think, even if you combine those.

• 56:51Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah.

• 56:52Speaker 02

  A combined average best tomato salad.

• 56:55Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 56:56Speaker 02

  Like a roasted and raw artichoke salad, really like lemony with some like pecorino and herbs.

• 57:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 57:02Speaker 02

  And then some sauteed, garlicky, what do you call it in English? That chimadira, you know, that green, it's like slightly bitter. You get in Italian, can you look up what's that called? What's that called?

• 57:13Speaker 00

  What's that called?

• 57:14Speaker 02

  Can you look up what's that called in English?

• 57:16Speaker 00

  It's like green, greens.

• 57:18Speaker 02

  I don't think it's just greens.

• 57:19Speaker 00

  There's some things that are just greens, right?

• 57:21Speaker 02

  You would, you definitely would have had it at an Italian restaurant.

• 57:24Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 57:24Speaker 02

  Yeah. Well, some sort of like sauteed, garlicky, olive oily, lemony green.

• 57:28Speaker 00

  Yes, bitter.

• 57:29Speaker 02

  Slightly bitter, not too bitter, but yeah, it is.

• 57:32Speaker 00

  Yeah. Charred, is it like charred?

• 57:34Speaker 02

  It's kind of giving charred, but a bit more bitter and not, not as like watery.

• 57:38Speaker 00

  Okay, it's giving charred, write that one down.

• 57:40Speaker 02

  Kind of. It's more giving like, not chicory, but like the chicory leaves, do you know what I mean?

• 57:46Speaker 00

  Right.

• 57:47Speaker 02

  No, you guys don't look like you don't want me.

• 57:48Speaker 00

  I know, I know, I know chicory.

• 57:50Speaker 02

  Broccoli rub, that's what you call it in English.

• 57:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 57:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 57:53Speaker 01

  It's one of Andy Bernard's friends from the office.

• 57:57Speaker 02

  That's it for my dream main, but I have some honorable munchions if I may.

• 58:00Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 58:01Speaker 00

  Let's do them.

• 58:02Speaker 02

  Like a whole dim sum feast.

• 58:04Speaker 00

  Nice.

• 58:05Speaker 02

  Just all of it, but specifically prawn chung fun.

• 58:09Speaker 00

  Mm hmm.

• 58:09Speaker 02

  And stir fried turnip cakes.

• 58:12Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. Love turnip cakes.

• 58:14Speaker 02

  Have you had the ones from Tahu Tahu Ju, where they're like in little bits and like stir fried with bits of, um, is it the choice, I'm a morning glory, I can't remember.

• 58:23Speaker 00

  I can't go in there anymore because James dropped me in it.

• 58:25Speaker 02

  Ah.

• 58:26Speaker 01

  I did it.

• 58:27Speaker 02

  Dropped you in the lot.

• 58:27Speaker 01

  I absolutely did it. In the early days of this podcast, I shouted out Tahu Tahu Ju for their wasabi king prawns.

• 58:35Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 58:35Speaker 01

  Right up your street.

• 58:36Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 58:37Speaker 01

  And then I gave them such a big shout out. And then I went in again and I had them and I was like, they've changed the sauce. They've changed the wasabi sauce. It's not as good. And I had it a couple of times. I was like, that's a permanent change. This is bad. This is bad. I've told everyone to come in. So then, and I never would do this now, but it was the early days of the pod. So I was like, it came up again. And I was like, you just, they've changed it. It's not, it's not as good anymore.

• 58:58Speaker 02

  You said that on the pod?

• 58:59Speaker 01

  Yeah, I said it on the pod.

• 59:00Speaker 00

  You wait for this.

• 59:01Speaker 01

  Then I went.

• 59:01Speaker 02

  And then what?

• 59:02Speaker 01

  Then, then I went in there again and the waiter came over and I had, I ordered them. I was like, yeah, still not great.

• 59:08Speaker 02

  What, you said that to him?

• 59:09Speaker 01

  No, I was thinking that to myself.

• 59:10Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 59:11Speaker 01

  Then the waiter came over and went, I don't like the prawns.

• 59:14Speaker 02

  He gave you another one?

• 59:15Speaker 01

  He said, how do you, how do you like them?

• 59:16Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 59:17Speaker 01

  They nice? And I was like, uh oh.

• 59:20Speaker 01

  And so I was thought, I just need to be.

• 59:22Speaker 02

  You think they spat in it?

• 59:23Speaker 01

  No, no. I don't think, how do you not spit in food?

• 59:26Speaker 02

  No, definitely.

• 59:27Speaker 01

  But I think you'd heard the pod. So I was like, uh, I, I went to once, I think I probably even did say to him, that's not as a wasabi-y as it used to be. But he said, and then he showed me his phone. And it was the episode. And he went, put it on the screen. He went, Gamble said that there's not enough wasabi in it anymore. Gamble said that, uh, we've changed the recipe.

• 59:48Speaker 00

  Unbelievable.

• 59:48Speaker 01

  And I went, yes, he did.

• 59:51Speaker 02

  That is absolutely gold.

• 59:54Speaker 00

  I've not been in there since.

• 59:55Speaker 02

  That's hilarious. Well done, James.

• 59:57Speaker 01

  I was like.

• 59:58Speaker 00

  And now I want these turnip cakes, but I can't go in because Gamble's had to change the recipe.

• 1:00:02Speaker 02

  But now that I think about it, there is somewhere else that you can go for really good stir fry turnip cakes. Have you been to Phoenix Palace in Baker Street?

• 1:00:08Speaker 00

  I can't go in there anymore.

• 1:00:09Speaker 02

  What? What happened there?

• 1:00:12Speaker 00

  No, I've not been.

• 1:00:13Speaker 02

  You must, you absolutely must. And their stir fry turnip cakes are sensational. So that's one of my honourable munchings, but also my, like a really good Cantonese roast duck. With morning glory.

• 1:00:25Speaker 00

  Window duck. Yeah, window duck.

• 1:00:28Speaker 02

  But I don't really like the idea of it being in the window.

• 1:00:30Speaker 00

  I love the idea of it being in the window.

• 1:00:32Speaker 02

  Really?

• 1:00:32Speaker 00

  Are you telling me I'm eating a duck from the window? I feel starstruck.

• 1:00:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's like getting the clothes for the mannequin.

• 1:00:40Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:00:42Speaker 02

  There we go. Look at all that expression.

• 1:00:44Speaker 00

  Yeah, I know. That's the first time I've found anything funny.

• 1:00:49Speaker 02

  And then my final honourable munchion, oh, I've got two more, lasagna, the best lasagna ever. Our combined average of a best lasagna ever.

• 1:00:58Speaker 01

  Well, my best lasagna ever is the one you made.

• 1:01:00Speaker 02

  Oh, that's really, oh my god.

• 1:01:01Speaker 01

  So what am I?

• 1:01:03Speaker 02

  No, but I don't, I actually don't want it to be a prawn lasagna. So.

• 1:01:07Speaker 00

  Yeah, because if my, if yours is a prawn lasagna and mine's got pork and beef in it.

• 1:01:12Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 1:01:12Speaker 00

  That means if we combine it all, that's gonna be.

• 1:01:14Speaker 02

  Pork, beef and prawn, mate.

• 1:01:15Speaker 00

  Pork, pork, beef and prawn lasagna.

• 1:01:17Speaker 02

  Why would that not be delicious?

• 1:01:18Speaker 00

  Mate, we're always thinking about it now.

• 1:01:19Speaker 02

  Okay, so pork, beef and prawn lasagna, loads of layers.

• 1:01:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:01:24Speaker 02

  Not too sloppy, but not too dry. Crispy on the edges.

• 1:01:28Speaker 00

  Mm hmm.

• 1:01:30Speaker 02

  Mm hmm. That's it.

• 1:01:31Speaker 00

  I love lasagna.

• 1:01:32Speaker 02

  I love lasagna. Lasagna actually maybe would just be my every course. But I haven't picked it for any of my courses, but it is right up there at the, on the third honourable munchion.

• 1:01:42Speaker 01

  What do you think about, uh, Garfield?

• 1:01:45Speaker 02

  I don't really, I know he loves a lasagna. I know he hates Mondays.

• 1:01:49Speaker 00

  Yeah, that's pretty much the whole character.

• 1:01:51Speaker 02

  That's pretty, I know he's lazy.

• 1:01:53Speaker 00

  Yeah, he's lazy. Yeah.

• 1:01:54Speaker 02

  That's all I know. What do you think about Garfield?

• 1:01:57Speaker 01

  I love him. I think.

• 1:01:58Speaker 02

  You identify.

• 1:01:59Speaker 01

  Me and Garfield should be in a lasagna lovers WhatsApp group.

• 1:02:02Speaker 02

  You probably would actually eat loads of lasagna with him, unlike me.

• 1:02:05Speaker 01

  He probably wouldn't post very often on the WhatsApp group because he's lazy though.

• 1:02:08Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:02:08Speaker 02

  True.

• 1:02:09Speaker 01

  We always be having, Garfield, come on.

• 1:02:10Speaker 00

  Especially not on Monday.

• 1:02:11Speaker 01

  Not on Monday. He's just absolutely silent.

• 1:02:13Speaker 00

  Yeah. Garfield, everything all right, buddy?

• 1:02:16Speaker 01

  Thumbs down in everything.

• 1:02:17Speaker 00

  Yeah, not even red.

• 1:02:19Speaker 01

  Buddy, you gotta stop this.

• 1:02:20Speaker 02

  Thumbs down.

• 1:02:21Speaker 01

  This is a lasagna lovers group. We're trying to keep things positive.

• 1:02:25Speaker 02

  I wanna be part of that group.

• 1:02:27Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, there you go. Three of us on there. Ad lives in lasagna, actually.

• 1:02:30Speaker 00

  I do, but I wanna be on there, thank you.

• 1:02:31Speaker 01

  You're on it, you're on it.

• 1:02:32Speaker 02

  Who doesn't love lasagna? Only psychopaths.

• 1:02:34Speaker 00

  I think globally, if you, well, maybe not globally, I was gonna, Europe wide, if you said, what's the best food, I reckon lasagna would win.

• 1:02:41Speaker 02

  Do you think?

• 1:02:41Speaker 00

  Right.

• 1:02:42Speaker 01

  Could do.

• 1:02:43Speaker 02

  Have you guys ever done a bowl?

• 1:02:44Speaker 01

  I'm shaking his head, but he doesn't know.

• 1:02:46Speaker 02

  Benita, you must have the numbers because you've asked so many people how, what your favourite food is.

• 1:02:50Speaker 00

  But no one would pick it as, as like officially as their dream thing on this podcast, I don't think. Not many people have, but as a go to, what's, what's your favourite food? What do you wanna eat tonight? I reckon the majority of people would say lasagna.

• 1:03:03Speaker 01

  I I reckon the the food that the least amount of people turn down would be lasagna, number one. No one says no to it.

• 1:03:10Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:03:10Speaker 02

  No, apart from.

• 1:03:12Speaker 01

  But eat it apparently.

• 1:03:13Speaker 02

  Pasta.

• 1:03:13Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 1:03:19Speaker 00

  Dream drink.

• 1:03:21Speaker 02

  Um, so I did have my mezcalita.

• 1:03:23Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 1:03:23Speaker 02

  So that is.

• 1:03:25Speaker 00

  That's locked in.

• 1:03:25Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's locked in for the starter. Um, and then for this main situation, I'm gonna go for a chilled red, which I feel like is just a bit of an obvious thing these days.

• 1:03:36Speaker 00

  It's very, um, Real Housewives of Clapton.

• 1:03:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:03:39Speaker 00

  Yeah, but it's good.

• 1:03:41Speaker 02

  So good, so good. So like a light chilled red is what I would like.

• 1:03:46Speaker 01

  Um, a specific red?

• 1:03:48Speaker 02

  Yes, actually, seeing as you're asking.

• 1:03:50Speaker 00

  Mm hmm. I like it when James sounds like an actual waiter, just always think of me. A specific red?

• 1:03:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:03:56Speaker 02

  Um, there's a producer called Mata Burro, which is on the French border with Spain. I think it's in France, but it's like basically in Spain. Should probably get this right. And they have a wine called Idoine, I D O I N E. And it is absolutely sensational. Like, the first time I drunk it, the first time I tried it, I was with a bunch of friends. We were all just just like, gobsmacked at how delicious it was. So I want that.

• 1:04:23Speaker 00

  Is it? Is it natural?

• 1:04:24Speaker 02

  It is natural, but not like I I sensed the the the way you asked that.

• 1:04:29Speaker 00

  No, I I like I I, you know, I went through that phase.

• 1:04:32Speaker 02

  No, no, I'm also not really a massive fan of like super funky.

• 1:04:35Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:04:35Speaker 02

  Natural wines like.

• 1:04:36Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:04:36Speaker 02

  I.

• 1:04:37Speaker 01

  I like them.

• 1:04:38Speaker 02

  Do you?

• 1:04:39Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:04:39Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:04:39Speaker 00

  It can go too far.

• 1:04:40Speaker 01

  But I'm not a wine connoisseur in general. So for me, whenever I'm having wine, it's just like rare that I'm having a glass of wine. So whatever it is, I'm like, it's a novelty. So if I'm having a natural wine, it's as exciting as if I'm having a.

• 1:04:53Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:04:54Speaker 00

  No, there's really nice natural wines, but you're right. There's some that are just like super, super funky and.

• 1:04:58Speaker 02

  I don't, yeah.

• 1:04:59Speaker 00

  Bit it. There's bits in it.

• 1:05:00Speaker 02

  No, I I don't want if it's super funky and super sour and like vinegary. Like, I'm just not that adventurous. Bit boring. But this one is like highly quaffable. I didn't want to say that, but it is.

• 1:05:11Speaker 01

  I thought you didn't want to say it.

• 1:05:12Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:05:13Speaker 02

  I was like, I was like, trying to think of another word. What's another word?

• 1:05:15Speaker 00

  It's the only one.

• 1:05:16Speaker 02

  The only one.

• 1:05:18Speaker 01

  It's like quaffable.

• 1:05:19Speaker 02

  So yeah, that's and that's gonna go really well with the rabbit pork cutlet with the aioli and the salsa verde and the peppercorn sauce and the tomatoes and the potato. Oh my god.

• 1:05:28Speaker 01

  Do you find that cause you're a chef, when you're putting this like a, even though it's a hypothetical menu together, that you are thinking like, okay, if I'm serving this, what goes with that? What goes with that? I need, I need a bit of this. I need something like that. Are you thinking a bit differently to how other guests might think about it?

• 1:05:45Speaker 02

  Uh, I guess so. I do want everything to be perfectly balanced. And when I say perfectly balanced, for me, I need it to be like, super salty and super sour. So like, I want loads of lemon and loads of salt on the table. Um, and I want loads of sauces. I want like something herby and I want maybe something a bit garlicy, something creamy like. So yeah, I, I guess I do think about that. Put things making sense together.

• 1:06:08Speaker 01

  Mm hmm. Yeah. Well, I mean, uh, well, when you're describing your main course, I was like, this seems to be a proper meal that you could get.

• 1:06:15Speaker 02

  Well, isn't that the, isn't that the point?

• 1:06:17Speaker 00

  Some people don't take that as the point.

• 1:06:18Speaker 01

  That is not what everyone does.

• 1:06:20Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:06:21Speaker 02

  No?

• 1:06:21Speaker 01

  But it was when you were describing it, I was like, oh yeah, I could.

• 1:06:23Speaker 02

  No, but I would very gladly have that whole situation as my main, but with also a Cantonese roast duck and a prawn chung fun and stir fry turnip cake. I'm like, I mean, ideally, can I have that? Can that all be part? Does it have to be an honorable mention?

• 1:06:35Speaker 00

  No, I think you've already called them out as honorable mentions. And you've already got the Mexican platter upon platter for your starter.

• 1:06:42Speaker 01

  I think it's a, uh.

• 1:06:43Speaker 02

  But why that?

• 1:06:45Speaker 00

  It was, we've just complimented you saying it was very well balanced and you're trying to chuck a roast duck on top of it.

• 1:06:50Speaker 02

  Why would you not want to, oh god, comedy.

• 1:06:51Speaker 01

  I, I, I do think that there is, uh, an argument that in the future, we should do like some one-off, uh, little episodes that are like banquet specials.

• 1:07:01Speaker 02

  Mmm.

• 1:07:02Speaker 01

  Where we just let someone have a proper medieval feast of whatever they want on the whole table. And, and we just see how long that episode runs for.

• 1:07:12Speaker 01

  Dream dessert.

• 1:07:15Speaker 01

  I don't like this.

• 1:07:16Speaker 00

  Uh oh.

• 1:07:17Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:07:17Speaker 00

  I like this.

• 1:07:18Speaker 01

  You're just eating like butt tons of food and then we get to the dessert. If you're gonna, if you're gonna.

• 1:07:22Speaker 00

  And you're not full, remember as well.

• 1:07:23Speaker 02

  I'm not full.

• 1:07:24Speaker 01

  If you wanna savoury this or skip it.

• 1:07:26Speaker 02

  Don't you worry. Of course I'm having a dessert.

• 1:07:28Speaker 00

  Yanking your chain.

• 1:07:30Speaker 01

  Jesus Christ, I felt it. You got me back for something proper. That's it. I've got a bigger fright than you did.

• 1:07:35Speaker 02

  No, I'm gonna have both actually. So.

• 1:07:37Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:07:38Speaker 02

  For dessert, is it okay to pick one of my own recipes?

• 1:07:41Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:07:41Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:07:42Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:07:42Speaker 01

  Just so you know, I think you're the first person to do it. How's that make you feel?

• 1:07:45Speaker 00

  No, loads of people have created their own thing.

• 1:07:47Speaker 01

  Oh, but not, I think first chef to do it, I think. But yeah, I think you absolutely choose one of your own recipes. You should be back in your own stuff and being like, this is the most delicious thing.

• 1:07:55Speaker 02

  Well, I did make, okay, so actually it started with an ice cream that I used to love as a kid. Have you, did you ever have a winner taco?

• 1:08:04Speaker 00

  A winner taco?

• 1:08:04Speaker 02

  Oh my God. Okay. So in Italy, they're, they're like, it's an ice cream in a shell.

• 1:08:10Speaker 00

  In like a hard shell.

• 1:08:11Speaker 02

  Like a wafer shell. And then it's like filled with ice cream, then dipped in, it has like caramelly swirls and then dipped in chocolate and nuts.

• 1:08:18Speaker 00

  I know the one you're talking about.

• 1:08:19Speaker 02

  So it's like, you know, like a hard shell taco.

• 1:08:23Speaker 01

  Mm hmm. Great.

• 1:08:23Speaker 02

  But like a wafer. And I used to fucking love those as a child. And then they just disappeared. They like discontinued. I was like, what the fuck? So then a few years ago, I was like, well, I could just make my own. And also it's called a chocolate taco. So why not, it should be made out of an actual taco, like a corn tortilla. So I took like a soft corn tortilla and then like brushed it in like melted butter and maple syrup and then like baked it. And it kind of ended up tasting like a giant crunchy nut cornflake.

• 1:08:54Speaker 01

  So to begin with that, when you're creating this, are you just doing the shells on the, are you like, first things first, I've got to sort the shell?

• 1:09:01Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:09:02Speaker 01

  And then you're doing that and you're, how many, till you got it right?

• 1:09:04Speaker 00

  You can't start with the ice cream in that section.

• 1:09:06Speaker 02

  No, no, no, you can't start. It was, this was a process, let me tell you. You cannot start with the ice cream. So it took me so many times to like, so what I ended up doing is like, so the tortilla at first, when you put it in, it's like bathed in butter and maple syrup. So it's quite like floppy and wet.

• 1:09:21Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 1:09:21Speaker 02

  So I hung it over like the racks of an oven.

• 1:09:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:09:25Speaker 02

  Can you picture it?

• 1:09:25Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:09:26Speaker 02

  And then it like baked and caramelized like that in that shape. So it was like a.

• 1:09:30Speaker 01

  Great.

• 1:09:31Speaker 02

  Like a ta- hard shell taco, but made out of corn, whereas, you know, originally they're just like, not wafer, but like just wheat biscuit.

• 1:09:39Speaker 01

  Mm hmm.

• 1:09:39Speaker 02

  Anyway, so it was like giant crunchy nut cornflake and then like brushed with loads of chocolate inside, because I fucking love chocolate.

• 1:09:46Speaker 01

  Milk chocolate, dark chocolate?

• 1:09:48Speaker 02

  Um, somewhere in between.

• 1:09:49Speaker 01

  Great.

• 1:09:50Speaker 02

  Like maybe like fifty five, sixty percent.

• 1:09:52Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 1:09:52Speaker 02

  Something like that.

• 1:09:53Speaker 01

  Brexit.

• 1:09:54Speaker 02

  Uh, well.

• 1:09:55Speaker 01

  Nearly Brexit. That was, that was close to being.

• 1:09:59Speaker 00

  Brexit chocolate.

• 1:09:59Speaker 01

  Felt, felt, felt.

• 1:10:00Speaker 02

  It's not.

• 1:10:01Speaker 01

  I know that was forty eight, fifty two, but it was.

• 1:10:03Speaker 02

  Specifically not Brexit chocolate.

• 1:10:04Speaker 01

  Just if it felt so close, it might have been Brexit. Sorry.

• 1:10:08Speaker 02

  That's okay.

• 1:10:10Speaker 02

  So then there's the chocolate, there's the Brexit, not Brexit chocolate.

• 1:10:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

• 1:10:14Speaker 02

  And then the ice cream I did inside was like a kind of a coffee, miso, maple cinnamon ice cream with like. Miso, maple caramel swirls. So that goes inside.

• 1:10:27Speaker 01

  Great.

• 1:10:27Speaker 02

  And then you dip it, like you dip the edge in chocolate again.

• 1:10:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, same chocolate.

• 1:10:33Speaker 02

  Same chocolate, Brexit chocolate.

• 1:10:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:10:35Speaker 02

  Uh, no, I don't want to be quite with that, quite not, just fifty five to sixty percent.

• 1:10:40Speaker 00

  Is that nerve wracking when you dip it?

• 1:10:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:10:42Speaker 02

  Oh, it's quite fun to kind of do it like, so you've got the bowl of melted chocolate and you kind of have to go like that.

• 1:10:47Speaker 01

  Like a pirate ship at the theme park.

• 1:10:48Speaker 02

  Exactly. That's a perfect description, James. Wow. That's really good.

• 1:10:53Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 1:10:54Speaker 00

  You're good with words and stuff.

• 1:10:55Speaker 02

  You really are.

• 1:10:56Speaker 00

  Do you refreeze it so the ice cream doesn't drop out?

• 1:10:58Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:10:59Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 1:10:59Speaker 02

  I forgot that step. Smart. Yeah. So fill it. So I put the ice cream in a, like made the ice cream. Then you don't want to set it until it's like super hard, but like, put it into a piping bag and like when it's at the perfect level of frozen that you can kind of pipe it. Then you pipe it into the shell, the chocolate, and it's like a thick layer of chocolate inside, not just like a thin brush. Then you pipe the ice cream in and then you're right, then you have to like freeze it again. So the ice cream sets and then you dip it in the chocolate and then in loads of caramelized nuts.

• 1:11:29Speaker 01

  So annoyed we can't eat this.

• 1:11:30Speaker 00

  Yeah, that sounds absolutely amazing.

• 1:11:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:11:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:11:34Speaker 01

  It's found a photo of it. It looks absolutely incredible.

• 1:11:37Speaker 02

  Actually, if you go to the right, you can see the dip, there's like a dip, the pirate ship dip.

• 1:11:42Speaker 01

  Oh, it's gonna be a little video of the dip.

• 1:11:44Speaker 00

  Oh yeah, look at this.

• 1:11:45Speaker 01

  It's great. We're just scrolling through.

• 1:11:46Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:11:47Speaker 01

  Pipe, piping in the ice cream.

• 1:11:49Speaker 02

  Piping it best. Oh, yeah. And it had nuts in the ice cream as well and caramel.

• 1:11:53Speaker 00

  You know, when, you know, when you, you know, when you know instinctively that you look at something, you go, if I tried that, it would be a fucking disaster. It would be such a mess.

• 1:12:00Speaker 02

  But you really can only do a few at a time because it is a, it is a nightmare to make. And I did put it on a menu somewhere that I did a residency for and was, it didn't turn out well. Like it's something that you need to do on a small scale.

• 1:12:12Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:12:13Speaker 02

  Like it just, it's, anyway, but it's so good.

• 1:12:17Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:12:18Speaker 02

  And I want that. Not made by me, though. I want someone else to make it.

• 1:12:22Speaker 00

  Who do you wanna make it? I mean, obviously the genie can make it, but you can have any, you could have.

• 1:12:26Speaker 02

  I think I'd like the genie to make it.

• 1:12:27Speaker 01

  I reckon that's the kind of thing that um first try, I'd nail it and I'd never do it well again. I'll be so focused on the first go.

• 1:12:34Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:12:35Speaker 01

  That I'd somehow it'd be.

• 1:12:36Speaker 00

  And there'd be luck involved as well, yeah.

• 1:12:38Speaker 01

  And then I'd never be able to do it again.

• 1:12:40Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:12:41Speaker 02

  I mean, I haven't really done it since. It's a pain in the ass. So that's why I'd want you, the genie, to make it.

• 1:12:46Speaker 01

  Pleasure.

• 1:12:46Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 1:12:46Speaker 01

  I will be eating them as I go, so it's gonna take a while for you to get, to get one.

• 1:12:51Speaker 02

  They're just so crunchy. And you know, when you have a cornetto and like the best bit at the end is like.

• 1:12:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:12:56Speaker 02

  The big chunk of chocolate that has a bit of ice cream on top, like.

• 1:12:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:13:00Speaker 02

  You've got that all the way through because like the chocolate's like, the layer of chocolate inside is thick.

• 1:13:04Speaker 01

  They've started selling those on their own, haven't they? The, the bottoms of um the cornetto.

• 1:13:09Speaker 02

  Shut up.

• 1:13:09Speaker 01

  I saw, I saw it somewhere in a bank.

• 1:13:11Speaker 02

  In your dreams?

• 1:13:12Speaker 01

  I was like.

• 1:13:12Speaker 00

  It's typical.

• 1:13:13Speaker 01

  But I was like, I don't, weirdly, I didn't want it.

• 1:13:15Speaker 02

  No, no, no, because you want, like, it's, it's the reward for having.

• 1:13:19Speaker 00

  Yeah, this is, this is this new generation.

• 1:13:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:13:22Speaker 00

  They don't wanna do any work. They just, yeah, they just wanna get straight to the tip.

• 1:13:27Speaker 01

  Well, on holiday last week.

• 1:13:29Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:13:29Speaker 01

  My partner got a Calippo. Put it in what.

• 1:13:32Speaker 02

  Flavor?

• 1:13:33Speaker 01

  Uh, orange. Put it, well, fair enough.

• 1:13:35Speaker 02

  No, keep going.

• 1:13:38Speaker 01

  Put it in what she thought was the freezer in the Airbnb. It wasn't, it was the fridge. Then she came back to us like, oh, it's all melted now. And I was like, that's the best bit is at the end of the clip where it's all juice. And she's like, I don't want to just say, do you want it? And I was like, actually, I don't. I've already learnt something about myself.

• 1:13:54Speaker 00

  Wow, that is one of the worst stories you've ever told.

• 1:13:56Speaker 01

  What?

• 1:13:58Speaker 00

  That story, if you tell that story, it's got to end with you drinking it.

• 1:14:01Speaker 01

  That's a good story.

• 1:14:01Speaker 02

  So neither, so what, you just put it back in the fridge and left it?

• 1:14:05Speaker 01

  Oh, we actually located the freezer and put it in there. But then, oh, here's a story. Here's, here's, here's the end of the story.

• 1:14:11Speaker 00

  Okay.

• 1:14:12Speaker 01

  When we left the Airbnb, we realised we still hadn't had it. It was in the freezer.

• 1:14:15Speaker 02

  So no one had the Clippo?

• 1:14:17Speaker 01

  Or whoever was in the Airbnb next, I imagine had it.

• 1:14:19Speaker 02

  Now, that's the good story, imagining who ate your Clippo. Like, it could have been anyone.

• 1:14:24Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:14:24Speaker 01

  They would have found, they would have found it in there.

• 1:14:26Speaker 00

  I'd imagine the owner of the Airbnb probably.

• 1:14:28Speaker 02

  Hmm, or the next.

• 1:14:29Speaker 00

  Did a quick scan and.

• 1:14:31Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, just a quick, quick little.

• 1:14:32Speaker 01

  Johnny, if you're listening, I hope you enjoyed it, brother.

• 1:14:35Speaker 00

  Johnny?

• 1:14:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, Johnny, his name. Johnny, I hope you enjoy the Clippo. And just like, I didn't have the heart to write this on the feedback, but you text way too frequently. And we could have done with hearing less of you.

• 1:14:49Speaker 02

  Oh, God, I really hope he was listening.

• 1:14:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:14:51Speaker 02

  Learned a thing or two about boundaries.

• 1:14:53Speaker 01

  Yeah. Fucking hell, he doesn't care, that guy. Constant. Then asks you at the end to give him a good review.

• 1:14:59Speaker 02

  Did he text you asking for a good review?

• 1:15:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. What's happened to me?

• 1:15:02Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:15:03Speaker 00

  What was he texting you throughout the trip?

• 1:15:05Speaker 01

  He kept on being like, how, how are you today? Is it good today?

• 1:15:07Speaker 02

  I've had that before, it's really.

• 1:15:08Speaker 01

  Anything I can do today? Everything's all right? Everything's fine, Johnny? All good? All good here? Okay. Are you gonna give a good review? Well, time will tell.

• 1:15:17Speaker 01

  You said maybe something savoury as well, though.

• 1:15:19Speaker 02

  I mean, I would like cheese as well.

• 1:15:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, sure.

• 1:15:21Speaker 02

  I'm almost full at this point. Thank you, Genie.

• 1:15:24Speaker 00

  Almost satisfied.

• 1:15:25Speaker 02

  Almost satisfied. Yeah, that's right. Not full.

• 1:15:28Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:15:28Speaker 02

  Almost satisfied, but I will have cheese. And I do like sheep cheeses. They're my favourite sort of variety, like a Spennwood. And I did have like a kind of, it was basically like a camembert but made out of sheep. And I don't know what it's called, but it was fucking delicious. So I'd like that. And a really good cheddar, like a very mature, grainy, crunchy cheddar.

• 1:15:50Speaker 02

  Maybe a Conte. Is it Conte or Conte?

• 1:15:53Speaker 00

  Commente.

• 1:15:54Speaker 02

  With an M.

• 1:15:55Speaker 00

  With an M.

• 1:15:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, one of those. And then I am a fan of like fruit, sweet and cheese, fruit and cheese. So I would like. Crazy, I know. Absolutely bonkers. First person to put it together. But um in Brazil, we have cheese with guava, like a guava paste, which is quite similar to like membro. What's that, quince? So I want that. So like guava, cheese, maybe some like fruity crap, fruity nutty crackers, but not like a water cracker.

• 1:16:25Speaker 00

  No, that is a bit, I, yeah, I'm not, I'm not into that, yeah.

• 1:16:28Speaker 02

  Or like those, no, any of those like Jacobs crackers or a water cracker horrendous, no.

• 1:16:33Speaker 00

  I like the digestive one. We've talked about this before. Well, they basically are, but in like a big box of crackers, like a selection box.

• 1:16:41Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:16:42Speaker 00

  There's always one that's in the shape of a loaf and it has Hovis written on it. And it's basically a digestive.

• 1:16:47Speaker 02

  Oh, I've never tried that.

• 1:16:48Speaker 00

  And you put like a really mature cheddar onto a digestive. Really good.

• 1:16:52Speaker 02

  I love a little hunk of cheddar now. I'm starving.

• 1:16:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:16:56Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:16:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, sorry. I was meant to make it so that you never get full and then get full at the end and now you're starving.

• 1:17:00Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:17:00Speaker 02

  It's true.

• 1:17:01Speaker 00

  It's a curse.

• 1:17:01Speaker 02

  You fail.

• 1:17:02Speaker 01

  It's a curse. I'm only going to make you back to you now, see how you feel about it.

• 1:17:05Speaker 02

  Please.

• 1:17:06Speaker 01

  Some of this I won't be able to say. You would like cold sparkling water from a babbling brook, shout out May Martin, with a short glass and three standard sized ice cubes in it and a medium amount of lime juice.

• 1:17:17Speaker 02

  It's perfect.

• 1:17:17Speaker 01

  You would like chicken liver crustini from the Co-op in Rafina?

• 1:17:23Speaker 02

  Rafina.

• 1:17:24Speaker 01

  Yep. Starter.

• 1:17:26Speaker 00

  He'll never go again.

• 1:17:27Speaker 01

  Mexican feast for your starter, Jamie Fleming's Tostada, raw bonito.

• 1:17:34Speaker 01

  Al pastor tacos from El Vincito, pork tamales from El Inca Plebeo.

• 1:17:44Speaker 02

  Which is Ecuadorian.

• 1:17:45Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 1:17:46Speaker 00

  James, you did the thing that basically every British man does where you can't pronounce something, so you just give a bit of hand. You just threw a bit of hand in.

• 1:17:54Speaker 02

  A bit of hand and a bit of.

• 1:17:55Speaker 01

  Yeah. A little gesture at the end. Ceviche, some guac and mezcalita, and a mezcalita. Pasta. Duh.

• 1:18:05Speaker 02

  This is going terribly.

• 1:18:07Speaker 01

  Penne a la conesse, penne a la conesse.

• 1:18:14Speaker 00

  Do the hand.

• 1:18:15Speaker 01

  Penne a la conesse. Main rabbit porketta with salsa verde, aioli, peppercorn sauce, protein rich peppercorn sauce. Side a Tuscan roast potatoes, tomato salad, sauteed greens. Drink chilled red.

• 1:18:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, baby.

• 1:18:36Speaker 01

  Dessert, those tacos, which are the best tacos ever, your own recipe, I'll make them. Um, and a bunch of cheese shit, cheese and crackers and stuff, doesn't really matter what they are.

• 1:18:47Speaker 00

  And guava.

• 1:18:48Speaker 01

  And guava and stuff.

• 1:18:49Speaker 02

  A bunch of cheese shit.

• 1:18:50Speaker 00

  You'd eat the guava.

• 1:18:51Speaker 01

  Huh?

• 1:18:52Speaker 00

  You'd eat the guava.

• 1:18:53Speaker 01

  I'd have the guava.

• 1:18:53Speaker 02

  Do you not like cheese at all?

• 1:18:54Speaker 01

  No, I do, I do. I would, I would, I would have.

• 1:18:58Speaker 02

  You'd have the cheese, of course.

• 1:18:59Speaker 01

  I would have some cheese for sure, especially, I keep thinking about like, and I know you don't like truffles, you'd hate it. There's truffle brie that I had and I just kept.

• 1:19:08Speaker 02

  Well, no, actually, you know, I don't, I don't mind a truffle brie, I just don't like truffle scented things.

• 1:19:13Speaker 00

  Like synthetic truffle, fair enough.

• 1:19:16Speaker 01

  How do you feel about that menu?

• 1:19:17Speaker 02

  I feel really good about it, but I do feel like it's missing roast duck, lasagna and prawn chow fun.

• 1:19:22Speaker 00

  Hmm, it is.

• 1:19:23Speaker 02

  And stir fry tartan cake, so we'll just add those in.

• 1:19:26Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, you can have that for yourself.

• 1:19:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:19:28Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:19:28Speaker 01

  You know, I mean.

• 1:19:29Speaker 02

  This is for myself.

• 1:19:30Speaker 00

  We'll give you a takeaway bag on the way out.

• 1:19:34Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:19:35Speaker 00

  We're kicking out the restaurant now, but you can have a takeaway bag with all those things in and you can eat them, eat them on the way out.

• 1:19:40Speaker 02

  No, I don't want a takeaway bag.

• 1:19:43Speaker 00

  But it's a takeaway bag or nothing, I'm afraid.

• 1:19:45Speaker 02

  Well, I'll take the takeaway bag then.

• 1:19:47Speaker 00

  Well, thank you very much. Thanks very much. Thanks for coming to the dream restaurant, Easter.

• 1:19:53Speaker 02

  Thank you so much for having me. It's been the honour of my life.

• 1:19:56Speaker 01

  Well, finally someone says it.

• 1:20:04Speaker 00

  There we go, James.

• 1:20:05Speaker 01

  Oh, Bonito's tummy's growling.

• 1:20:07Speaker 00

  Yeah, that's funny, isn't it? It was a nice menu, so I can understand why your tummy might be growling. But he held it. He held it like he was having a contraction.

• 1:20:14Speaker 01

  Yes, yes, he was very worried about it. He couldn't believe it.

• 1:20:17Speaker 00

  Bonito's waters have just broken.

• 1:20:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, he wasn't all relaxed, like, um, I don't know, Zaltzman, Andy Zaltzman.

• 1:20:23Speaker 00

  Andy Zaltzman, I mean, Zaltzman must just be rumbling 24/7.

• 1:20:27Speaker 01

  Didn't faze him at all.

• 1:20:28Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:20:29Speaker 01

  Bonito just looked at us there all worried and scared, like he was gonna die.

• 1:20:32Speaker 00

  Yeah, oh no, Bonito's.

• 1:20:33Speaker 01

  So take him to the hospital, his tummy's rumbling.

• 1:20:36Speaker 00

  Thank you so much, Easter, for coming on the show and thank you for not saying Easter egg and so sorry about that again.

• 1:20:41Speaker 01

  Yes, yes, thank you, Easter. Everyone should go and buy Easter's book, Mescler.

• 1:20:45Speaker 00

  And also Flavour, which you co-wrote with Yotam Ottolenghi.

• 1:20:48Speaker 01

  Yeah, shout out Ottolenghi. Oh, we don't give enough shout outs on this podcast.

• 1:20:54Speaker 00

  Peter Piper.

• 1:20:55Speaker 01

  Shout out Peter Piper, always.

• 1:20:57Speaker 00

  Always shout out Peter Piper.

• 1:20:59Speaker 01

  Always shout out Peter Piper, Ottolenghi. And I guess Easter, so Jesus Christ.

• 1:21:06Speaker 00

  Hmm.

• 1:21:06Speaker 01

  Since we were talking so much about Easter eggs earlier.

• 1:21:08Speaker 00

  Shout out Jesus Christ, yeah.

• 1:21:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, not because of Easter's name.

• 1:21:11Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:21:11Speaker 01

  But because of Easter.

• 1:21:12Speaker 00

  We were saying Easter eggs, yeah, yeah.

• 1:21:13Speaker 01

  So shout out JC.

• 1:21:15Speaker 00

  Yep. Thanks very much for listening.

• 1:21:17Speaker 01

  Was that we're ending the podcast?

• 1:21:18Speaker 00

  I don't think so. It's you who's just shouted out Jesus Christ.

• 1:21:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:21:23Speaker 00

  So what am I supposed to do now? So I'm supposed to clear up your mess and end the podcast?

• 1:21:27Speaker 01

  Well, I was hoping so.

• 1:21:28Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:21:29Speaker 01

  Thought you could clear up my mess.

• 1:21:30Speaker 00

  Shout out all deities.

• 1:21:32Speaker 01

  Yes, especially Jesus Christ.

• 1:21:34Speaker 00

  No, no, no, no, no. Thanks for listening.

• 1:21:38Speaker 01

  Goodbye, see you in heaven.

• 1:21:41Speaker 00

  When you get there.

• 1:21:42Speaker 01

  If you ever get there.