Butt Stroked By Space Goons: Daryl James Returns | FILE_07 | Mystery Boys

Duncan Trussell is touring all over! Check out his tour dates at http://duncantrussell.com/tour SPONSORS: Get $10 Off at BRUNT with code MYSTERY at https://www.bruntworkwear.com/MYSTERY #Bruntpod Save 20% on your first online Lucy order at https://lucy.co/MYSTERYBOYS with promo code MYSTERYBOYS! Welcome to Mystery Boys, the podcast from YMH Studios hosted by Kurt Metzger and Duncan Trussell. This week, the boys kick things off by reading the most unhinged comments left on previous Mystery Boys episodes before investigating John of God and Chelsea Handler's latest revelation. Then, former U. S. Navy serviceman Daryl James returns to share his alleged experiences working in a secret lunar program involving underground moon mines, fifth-density beings, alien civilizations, off-world Germans, and technology capable of age regression. The conversation spirals through Moonstein Island, space brothels, adrenochrome harvesting, interbreeding between aliens and demons, celebrity gossip on the Moon, CIA sci-fi books, cloning, and whether humanity has been quietly prepared for life beyond Earth all along. This is not a conspiracy podcast. This is a mystery appreciation podcast. Mystery Boys Ep. 07 https://www.instagram.com/duncantrussell https://www.instagram.com/kurtmetzgercomedy https://www.instagram.com/mysteryboyspodcast https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:02:19 - John Of God 00:07:10 - Spoiling The Backrooms 00:09:57 - Chelsea Handler's Genius Discovery 00:12:07 - Reading Mysterious Comments 00:29:25 - Going Goblin Mode 00:48:45 - Calling Daryl James: Moon Sex Guy 00:50:30 - Working In Mines On The Moon 01:00:47 - Explaining 5th Density 01:03:12 - Drinking With Satanist Goons In Space 01:11:42 - Playing Naked Guitar For A Space General 01:17:36 - Komodo Dragons Are Actually Dwarf Necromancers? 01:23:41 - Aliens Impregnating Themselves 01:27:44 - Harvesting Adrenochrome On The Moon 01:30:42 - Forgetting My Name In 5th Density 01:32:54 - Going To The Moon Brothels 01:38:50 - Getting Butt Stroked 01:40:32 - How Did Daryl Leave The Moon? 01:43:30 - Off-World Germans 01:49:54 - Going To The Space Trade Center 01:52:16 - Interbreeding With Aliens And Demons 01:53:50 - Kurp's Insane Theory 01:58:47 - How Long Was Daryl A Moon Prisoner & Age Regression Tech On The Moon 02:02:26 - Future Predictions About Israel 02:09:22 - Celebrity Gossip On The Moon 02:12:14 - CIA Sci-Fi Books 02:22:52 - Kurt's Weirdest Dream 02:30:20 - Being Replaced With Clones Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

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• 0:51Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, gnomes are fucking dicks.

• 0:53Kurt Metzger?

  Did you have a personal experience with a gnome?

• 0:55Duncan Trussell?

  Ask me about it and I'll tell you. They're fucking assholes.

• 0:59Kurt Metzger?

  Let me do the intro. Sorry, you know, naturally how shows start, where they're having a great conversation.

• 1:05Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:06Kurt Metzger?

  Not unlike any other show. I, of course, am Eliopis Merpsker?

• 1:19Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:20Kurt Metzger?

  And with me is also...

• 1:22Duncan Trussell?

  St. Crank.

• 1:23Kurt Metzger?

  My associate, St. Crank. And if we caught our last episode, which I... Our last episode, which we spoke to secret sp- secret sp- program. What is happening?

• 1:38Duncan Trussell?

  Space program.

• 1:39Kurt Metzger?

  Was it like bad to drink? When you do... Okay. Daryl James was on the show. And, you know, we didn't get as much out because what we got was absolutely fascinating. But, you know, it was really, it was like episode four. Like George Lucas, I started like somewhere in the middle of it.

• 1:55Duncan Trussell?

  That's right.

• 1:57Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, and we didn't get to his time as a slave on the moon. Where he was paid entirely in moon sex.

• 2:03Duncan Trussell?

  Holy fuck.

• 2:04Kurt Metzger?

  Stick around for that one. But we got a lot of housekeeping to do before our guest Daryl gets here and uh, that's why I would have asked. Uh, Dr. Crank, was it?

• 2:12Duncan Trussell?

  Saint Crank.

• 2:13Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, Saint Crank.

• 2:14Duncan Trussell?

  Saint Crank.

• 2:15Kurt Metzger?

  Are you a doctor?

• 2:16Duncan Trussell?

  And well, technically it's Dr. Saint Crank. But I go by Saint.

• 2:21Kurt Metzger?

  Is a saint a kind of doctor? I was not raised Catholic.

• 2:23Duncan Trussell?

  It, no, it isn't. And you should never get a saint if they wanna operate on you. Make sure they're a doctor.

• 2:30Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, wait, wait, wait. So I'm sorry, go back.

• 2:32Duncan Trussell?

  It's two separate things.

• 2:33Kurt Metzger?

  I let John of God scrape my corneas with a metal pu- uh, wire.

• 2:38Duncan Trussell?

  Did it fix them?

• 2:40Kurt Metzger?

  Uh. You know what? I realized really I probably needed to fix me and that was the problem.

• 2:45Duncan Trussell?

  I'll tell you something. I have a personal story about John of God. It's actually kinda depressing. Probably not a good way to start off the show.

• 2:51Kurt Metzger?

  You know, wait a minute. You knew J O G?

• 2:53Duncan Trussell?

  My mom, when she was dying from breast cancer, visited John of God. And uh, John of God uh, did some kind of surgery on her. Of course, this is before anybody knew that John of God was a sex trafficker.

• 3:08Kurt Metzger?

  Mm-hmm.

• 3:08Duncan Trussell?

  And uh.

• 3:09Kurt Metzger?

  We thought he was just a guy in South America that did surgery.

• 3:12Duncan Trussell?

  But, well, you know, when you're, when, when someone's dying of, you know, when your mom's dying of cancer.

• 3:18Kurt Metzger?

  Right.

• 3:18Duncan Trussell?

  Even though you wanna say, I don't know, man. I don't know that's gonna work. It's like, what are you gonna do?

• 3:25Kurt Metzger?

  What's sad and tragic about that story? I can't believe you hesitated to tell the story of your, your dear mother dying of cancer.

• 3:33Duncan Trussell?

  Or it gets even worse.

• 3:34Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, an Oprah Winfrey hot pick on her way out.

• 3:36Duncan Trussell?

  Or it gets, it gets worse is uh, he, he, he, she told me that he told her, you're not gonna die of breast cancer.

• 3:46Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, did she accidentally go to John O God? Which it's, it's like O with a little apostrophe God?

• 3:51Duncan Trussell?

  No.

• 3:52Kurt Metzger?

  Do people make that mistake?

• 3:53Duncan Trussell?

  She went to John of God.

• 3:56Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, I go to John for God.

• 3:58Duncan Trussell?

  The chiropractor.

• 3:59Kurt Metzger?

  Yes, and I gotta tell you, I'm walking taller, I'm coming harder.

• 4:04Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, you mean John Gotti? John of Gotti.

• 4:07Kurt Metzger?

  John of Gotti. Excuse me.

• 4:09Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 4:10Kurt Metzger?

  Thank you.

• 4:10Duncan Trussell?

  He can cure.

• 4:11Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, your mom didn't go to John, your mom didn't go to John of Gotti for cancer?

• 4:15Duncan Trussell?

  You, no, I, I'm sorry, John Gotti. My mom went to John Gotti.

• 4:18Kurt Metzger?

  He's like Dr. Zismore.

• 4:19Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, he told my mom she's not gonna die of cancer.

• 4:22Kurt Metzger?

  If you got bad ac- oh, rea- well. You know, up until a certain point, he was a man of his word.

• 4:28Duncan Trussell?

  He wa- it wasn't true.

• 4:29Kurt Metzger?

  You're, oh wow.

• 4:30Duncan Trussell?

  He died of cancer.

• 4:31Kurt Metzger?

  I can't believe Oprah knew John of Gotti. That's the fucking crazy thing.

• 4:34Duncan Trussell?

  No, that's wild that Oprah was friends with John of Gotti, but you know.

• 4:37Kurt Metzger?

  Do you kids know who Oprah is back there? She's kinda like if Mr. Beast was like a, a human driver.

• 4:46Kurt Metzger?

  Or more of a human driver.

• 4:50Kurt Metzger?

  Do you know about Mr. Beast? He, don't go to him for surgery, no matter how to.

• 4:54Duncan Trussell?

  Mr. Beast.

• 4:55Kurt Metzger?

  No matter how squig games your life is, do not let him give you surgery. That's, I think it's just sound advice.

• 5:00Duncan Trussell?

  Well, you have to ru- you have to run across a beam.

• 5:03Kurt Metzger?

  Well, there is, okay.

• 5:04Duncan Trussell?

  If you get across, he'll cure you.

• 5:05Kurt Metzger?

  There's a guy, John of God. I think that's a good one, cause he's from God.

• 5:10Duncan Trussell?

  Anytime anyone says they're of God, it's true.

• 5:13Kurt Metzger?

  Now, isn't of a mathematical thing where it's like times?

• 5:17Duncan Trussell?

  John of God.

• 5:18Kurt Metzger?

  So it's John times God, equals, you're not gonna die of cancer.

• 5:20Duncan Trussell?

  He, his claim was that he was channeling, uh, various healers throughout time. And so he was doing.

• 5:29Kurt Metzger?

  Wait a minute.

• 5:30Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 5:32Kurt Metzger?

  She told me he's middle manning the heal- he's basically, uh. Okay, I'm sorry, go ahead.

• 5:37Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, that's it. He was like, channeling, you could probably look up who was John of God channeling. But he was channeling various healers throughout time, and he would do the classic, I guess you palm chicken guts in your hand or whatever. And you, you, we could probably pull it up, like psychic surgery, where they, you, it's really just shit magic, where you just have a bunch of guts in your hand and you push them into somebody who's dying, and then you pull the guts back and they think you pulled out a tumor.

• 6:05Kurt Metzger?

  It's a, it's a well-known, uh, magical trick.

• 6:09Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, it's a classic magical trick.

• 6:10Kurt Metzger?

  I have seen, but I'm, in no way can qualify this. I'm only a judge and astronaut, so I don't get out of my area of expertise. You understand. So I can't, I can tell you what the law says about it.

• 6:21Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 6:22Kurt Metzger?

  We love it, more of it.

• 6:23Duncan Trussell?

  Indeed, there you go.

• 6:25Kurt Metzger?

  But, somebody was arguing to me that this like ridiculous magic trick kind is almost like a purposeful.

• 6:33Kurt Metzger?

  Like, uh, there's like a real kind. I find that hard to believe, but I think that's up to, uh...

• 6:38Duncan Trussell?

  That doesn't look real to you? Look, she's got her fist all the way in. You couldn't fake that.

• 6:42Kurt Metzger?

  Guys, I don't know if we can show pornography on here.

• 6:44Duncan Trussell?

  You couldn't fake that. But I'll tell you, if you want to do coin magic, the best people to do it for are people dying. Cause, you know, like, they're not, they don't pay attention as much.

• 6:52Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I just like ma- I like close up ma- I've always been a sucker for close up magic.

• 6:54Duncan Trussell?

  I do too. I love close up magic. It's amazing and...

• 6:58Kurt Metzger?

  Did that guy just fist me and pull out a chicken gizzard?

• 7:00Duncan Trussell?

  Holy shit. Yeah, I'm healed. And I, you know, I think the reason sometimes this works is because of, uh, what's it called? Spontaneous remission. It does happen where people will go to the doctor, their cancer's gone. It's because their immune system figured out that was cancer and maybe...

• 7:16Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, is that what, that's, oh, I thought you meant when like, you know, sometimes, somebody's alive, one minute, the next minute, there's just a smoldering pile on the chair and shoes?

• 7:24Duncan Trussell?

  No, that's spontaneous combustion, the terror of my childhood. When I read about that, I was so scared I was gonna burst into flames for all summer.

• 7:31Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, well, sometimes it happens to cancer victims. So you had to start stress with your mom, that she might go into spontaneous remission.

• 7:36Duncan Trussell?

  That's the oxygen.

• 7:39Kurt Metzger?

  Now, is that, is that a...

• 7:41Duncan Trussell?

  Can you pull up the, the, the yellow chair one? Cause that's hilarious.

• 7:46Kurt Metzger?

  Are you spoiling the end of Backrooms again? I have not seen it.

• 7:54Duncan Trussell?

  That is...

• 7:55Kurt Metzger?

  You know, I haven't seen these movies yet.

• 7:57Duncan Trussell?

  Please don't spoil Backroom.

• 8:01Duncan Trussell?

  God damn it, really? I was so looking forward to seeing that.

• 8:06Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, The Monster's not even that good.

• 8:09Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 8:10Kurt Metzger?

  Hey, uh, by the way, Tanner, speaking of spoiling things, Tanner has pulled some comments.

• 8:17Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, great.

• 8:17Kurt Metzger?

  Of, uh, viewer feedback. I mean, it's high time we address viewer. We're not a live show. It airs live, but of, uh, pre-taping.

• 8:24Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 8:24Kurt Metzger?

  Or post-taping, again.

• 8:25Duncan Trussell?

  Depending on when you watch.

• 8:26Kurt Metzger?

  If you're into linear time and you're like, I understand when it, that's an old story, why?

• 8:31Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 8:31Kurt Metzger?

  Or sometimes, just as easily, we could be talking about a story from the future.

• 8:34Duncan Trussell?

  You're watching an episode that hasn't even been recorded yet.

• 8:36Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, his mom knew John of God.

• 8:40Kurt Metzger?

  I don't hear you. By the way, I'm in the Epstein files and his mom knew John of God. Just you know who the fuck you're talking about.

• 8:44Duncan Trussell?

  That's who you're watching. Mobbed.

• 8:47Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, and I did, again, I keep reminding people I didn't do any crimes unless doing a Comedy Central show 12 years ago.

• 8:53Duncan Trussell?

  You're in the files.

• 8:55Kurt Metzger?

  That's right. Doesn't mean I did a crime.

• 8:56Duncan Trussell?

  Well, why are you getting so squirmy?

• 8:59Kurt Metzger?

  Even if I did, what the fuck would you do about it Tanner? You did nothing. You see any arrests from, I could have ate three babies and called pizza bagels in my emails.

• 9:11Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, what are you gonna do?

• 9:12Kurt Metzger?

  What are you gonna do? Go vote, you bitch?

• 9:14Duncan Trussell?

  You bitch. Why don't you go vote Tanner?

• 9:17Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. I know, he thinks he's above everything, this guy.

• 9:22Duncan Trussell?

  Why don't you go vote?

• 9:23Kurt Metzger?

  Chelsea Handler doesn't even know if the sun and moon are different things, but she takes the time to vote for who's gonna be the leader.

• 9:28Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, is that true?

• 9:30Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 9:31Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 9:31Kurt Metzger?

  I think it's the funniest story I've ever heard. I know we talked about this.

• 9:34Duncan Trussell?

  I don't think we talked about that.

• 9:36Kurt Metzger?

  When she was, she's on a talk show saying that, and I think she's not making it up because she's telling a story about her sister.

• 9:43Duncan Trussell?

  Please tell me, that's the craziest thing I've ever heard.

• 9:46Kurt Metzger?

  Oh my god. I like Gil, I like Gilf titties. Wait, wait, so hold on. She's, she heard, she, they were on a trip somewhere and she said something about like the sun and moon. And she's like, hold on, stop, I need to know right now what you think the relationship between the sun and the moon is. And she said, she's 40 when this happened. This is according to her. She said she thought the sun turns into the moon at night up until this trip with her sister. That should be a movie.

• 10:12Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, play this.

• 10:14Kurt Metzger?

  Eat, pray, learn.

• 10:16Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, you mean when she was like a little?

• 10:18Kurt Metzger?

  Forty years old. Well, it started when she was a kid, probably.

• 10:21Duncan Trussell?

  But, wait. Let's, we gotta hear this. This is shocking.

• 10:24Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, I got struck playing the video on my channel. I just want to point out.

• 10:27Speaker 03

  My sister and I were riding an elephant.

• 10:29Kurt Metzger?

  We just show your reaction.

• 10:29Speaker 03

  And there was a man riding an elephant for us because we don't know how to ride an elephant.

• 10:33Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 10:33Speaker 03

  And my older sister Simone looked up at the, at the, at the, the sky and she said, Chelsea, Chelsea, look up. It's not often you get to see the sun and the moon at the same time.

• 10:47Speaker 03

  And I was like, I was like Scooby Doo. I'm like, I said, and I go, wait, I go, but they're always together. And as soon as I said that, she turned around, she goes, what did you say? And I was like, oh, shut up, shut up, shut up.

• 10:59Duncan Trussell?

  First of all, uh.

• 11:01Kurt Metzger?

  She says she's 40 in it.

• 11:02Duncan Trussell?

  One way, one thing I do love about her, even though she was slightly confused about the sun and the moon, is who was a child hasn't experienced riding an elephant. Don't you remember when your parents would take?

• 11:12Kurt Metzger?

  No, she just had, no, no, okay. I don't know if she rode elephants her whole life. I know, I'm, I wouldn't, I wouldn't get near them. I know everybody thinks they're fucking magical Hindu wisdom beasts, but they'll kill you.

• 11:24Duncan Trussell?

  I don't think anybody thinks that. They'll trample your ass.

• 11:27Kurt Metzger?

  They'll stomp the shit out of you.

• 11:28Duncan Trussell?

  They fuck you up and they get mad. They attack cars.

• 11:30Kurt Metzger?

  Try to order an elephant around like it's 50 cent on who to vote and it will crush you.

• 11:34Duncan Trussell?

  It will crush your ass.

• 11:36Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, she probably would like that. But anyway, no, she was 40 when that happened, not a child, she was 40. So that was Sex and the City goes to Dubai, the sequel that wasn't as, uh.

• 11:45Duncan Trussell?

  That is so insane. That is so insane. That she thought that. That really.

• 11:49Kurt Metzger?

  Did she thought that?

• 11:51Kurt Metzger?

  You're gonna have to speed up the video because when I played it, somebody else didn't believe me. It sounds like I made it up. But I thought everybody remembered this because I was like, that's very funny of her to tell the story. But I mean, I would tell that story too if I couldn't write my own jokes.

• 12:03Duncan Trussell?

  What is that?

• 12:05Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 12:07Kurt Metzger?

  All right. Well, it was better late than never is what we learned. Let's look at these comments because, you know, we could goon off to Hot Gilf. Hot Gilf signs all day, if, you know?

• 12:19Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 12:20Kurt Metzger?

  Hey, come on, come on, Saint Craig, you know what I'm?

• 12:24Duncan Trussell?

  I, I, I love to goon.

• 12:25Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, now, uh, yeah, mhm.

• 12:29Duncan Trussell?

  I'll goon anything, baby.

• 12:31Kurt Metzger?

  And I like that movie Goon starring Stifler from American Pie.

• 12:36Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, I do too.

• 12:37Kurt Metzger?

  Let's see. Duncan Trussell is Kurt Mesker's handler. Um.

• 12:42Duncan Trussell?

  How does that make you feel? 884, 884 thumbs up.

• 12:43Kurt Metzger?

  I feel like we heard this and I said.

• 12:47Kurt Metzger?

  Well, that's the part that I'm a little upset about.

• 12:50Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, it's kind of.

• 12:50Kurt Metzger?

  I thought this was handled, addressed. We addressed these, these are old charges that we've addressed. Yes, he's my handler. He's my Chelsea handler. That's what I said. And we just watched simp. Oh, Duncan. Oh.

• 13:02Duncan Trussell?

  Duncan's such a simp.

• 13:05Duncan Trussell?

  What does that mean?

• 13:05Kurt Metzger?

  I only saw simp for a minute and I thought it was a bad message.

• 13:08Duncan Trussell?

  What does simp mean?

• 13:10Kurt Metzger?

  Hmm. Oh, like, uh, I think it's like a sympathetic person that like you feel.

• 13:14Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, I am. I'm very sympathetic. Thank you so much. Yeah.

• 13:17Kurt Metzger?

  That John and God story you told me, I was like, oh, I really simp this guy.

• 13:21Duncan Trussell?

  Well, here's the real question. Like, can I be your handler and a simp?

• 13:26Kurt Metzger?

  You know, it's not only a great song title.

• 13:28Duncan Trussell?

  Do you want your handler to be a simp?

• 13:31Kurt Metzger?

  What am I have a handler for if they're not gonna simp?

• 13:33Duncan Trussell?

  That's true.

• 13:34Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, I need a handler to mog me, please. Some of you people sound like at, complete idiots.

• 13:43Kurt Metzger?

  How do you get this stupid?

• 13:45Duncan Trussell?

  Zen, Zen exile.

• 13:47Kurt Metzger?

  Zen exile.

• 13:48Duncan Trussell?

  First of all, you, that's the main thing is like, if you're gonna, if you're gonna throw insults.

• 13:53Kurt Metzger?

  Who's he talking to?

• 13:54Duncan Trussell?

  You can't call yourself Zen fucking exile. What are you, exiled from Zen Buddhism?

• 13:58Kurt Metzger?

  Well, no, no, Zen Buddhism is spelled with one N and I see.

• 14:02Duncan Trussell?

  No, that's what I'm saying. It's a misspelling of Zen, but you would expect that.

• 14:05Kurt Metzger?

  That's not the middle initial and his middle initial is probably.

• 14:07Duncan Trussell?

  This asshole thinks he's in exile.

• 14:09Kurt Metzger?

  I think his full name is Zen N word exile and that's probably why.

• 14:12Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, shit.

• 14:14Kurt Metzger?

  You know how manga that's like the stories in the name like thing?

• 14:16Duncan Trussell?

  Zen, Zenexil. Maybe it's a, maybe some kind of.

• 14:19Kurt Metzger?

  In exile for saying, you know what?

• 14:22Duncan Trussell?

  Zenexil. How do you get this stupid? I don't know.

• 14:26Kurt Metzger?

  But.

• 14:26Duncan Trussell?

  Decades of drug abuse?

• 14:29Kurt Metzger?

  I don't, I'm not sure who he's addressing. Is he addressing other commenters or like?

• 14:32Duncan Trussell?

  It could be himself. It could just be a general question to the universe. It's a good thing to ask.

• 14:37Kurt Metzger?

  It's kind of a Zen question to ponder a bit.

• 14:40Duncan Trussell?

  How do you get this stupid?

• 14:41Kurt Metzger?

  How do I get this stupid? How do I get this stupid?

• 14:43Duncan Trussell?

  How do you get this stupid? Maybe you know, maybe forgot a comma.

• 14:47Kurt Metzger?

  What my name is.

• 14:50Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 14:51Kurt Metzger?

  I don't know how to answer that comment and I shouldn't know how.

• 14:54Duncan Trussell?

  Duncan vapes like a gay.

• 14:57Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, can I, I'd like to, okay, first of all, sir.

• 15:01Duncan Trussell?

  Now that one hurts.

• 15:02Kurt Metzger?

  First of all, sir, can I say something? Uh, number one, you misspelled goy. Number two.

• 15:07Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, now come on.

• 15:11Duncan Trussell?

  Both are true, probably.

• 15:12Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, vape like a gay? That's another great band name.

• 15:15Duncan Trussell?

  I, I, listen, I probably do.

• 15:18Kurt Metzger?

  Well, how?

• 15:19Duncan Trussell?

  All I can say is it's probably true.

• 15:22Kurt Metzger?

  You, you're telling me you, you have a vape suppository?

• 15:25Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 15:25Kurt Metzger?

  Nothing. Let's go to the next one.

• 15:27Duncan Trussell?

  Is that possible?

• 15:28Kurt Metzger?

  I like, and shout out to Senseaponics for putting his picture. Uh, look, look at what a mensch this guy is.

• 15:36Duncan Trussell?

  Let's enlarge, can we enlarge Senseaponics picture just so I could see this man who stabbed a dagger right in my heart?

• 15:42Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, Senseaponics, thanks, thanks, man. He's one of these gay goys.

• 15:45Duncan Trussell?

  Enlarge this, please. I gotta see this dude. He seems cool as fuck. My feelings are even more hurt.

• 15:51Kurt Metzger?

  Almost like you want to kiss him a little bit, right?

• 15:53Duncan Trussell?

  He's hot.

• 15:55Kurt Metzger?

  You know what? He looks like if Elon, now I know he's blurry. But you know when you see young pictures of Elon Musk? If Elon Musk had been a Chad instead of an Elon.

• 16:04Duncan Trussell?

  It's true. He's a Chad.

• 16:06Kurt Metzger?

  He looks like a Chad Elon Musk.

• 16:08Duncan Trussell?

  We've been mobbed.

• 16:09Kurt Metzger?

  He's giving you tech help with your vaping.

• 16:12Duncan Trussell?

  I'm not gonna change, I'm not changing the way I vape. Isn't this Pride Month?

• 16:18Duncan Trussell?

  That's why I was vaping like that.

• 16:20Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, maybe he's celebrating Pride Month with you.

• 16:21Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. It's Pride Month, you, you homophobic fuck.

• 16:26Kurt Metzger?

  Boy, when is the gay shame parade? Because?

• 16:28Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, what, what's wrong with vaping like a gay?

• 16:31Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I, he didn't, you know, uh, he's not assigning a value to it. He's just saying that you do.

• 16:37Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, it's like a just a observation.

• 16:40Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, have you ever vaped and someone didn't think you were gay for vaping? Like, has it ever? I've, I, people are like, just smoke.

• 16:47Duncan Trussell?

  Right, because it implies there's like a heterosexual way to vape and I don't.

• 16:50Kurt Metzger?

  Cause I like a nice peach berry vape and I can have it in these.

• 16:54Duncan Trussell?

  Alright, you got me Senseaponics. I vape like a gay.

• 16:58Kurt Metzger?

  Oi, oi. Oh no, that's, okay.

• 17:01Duncan Trussell?

  R. Kelly's doo doo butter.

• 17:03Kurt Metzger?

  Oh. Is that, what, what out, what label were they with?

• 17:09Duncan Trussell?

  R. Kelly?

• 17:09Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, these guys have like, you know, their friends that are singers and shit. I assume that that's he's from like doo doo butter.

• 17:16Duncan Trussell?

  First of all, R. Kelly's doo doo butter is a member of Operation Peace Blast. We don't have to talk about that. I do know him.

• 17:23Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, the singer? Oh, I thought they meant my friend Robert Kelly from New York.

• 17:26Duncan Trussell?

  Let's just read it.

• 17:27Kurt Metzger?

  Bobby Kelly, I call him, but.

• 17:28Duncan Trussell?

  Kerp is a large.

• 17:29Kurt Metzger?

  He makes a great doo doo butter. I don't know if you're into that, but.

• 17:32Duncan Trussell?

  Doo doo butter is fantastic.

• 17:33Kurt Metzger?

  The guy's a bit of a foodie.

• 17:35Duncan Trussell?

  Nothing like a good New York doo doo butter.

• 17:37Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, well, he's from Boston. Yeah. Oh, dude, I made you doo doo butter, dude. I can't do him, but.

• 17:45Duncan Trussell?

  I.

• 17:45Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, Kerp is a large person. I can imagine tow-ing over Joe now. Oh, you don't know. I don't think you need to put my literal depiction of my eyes in those.

• 17:59Kurt Metzger?

  You know, okay, we get it. You painted a picture with words. You don't have to literally screen grab my real eyes in those.

• 18:07Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, that is wild.

• 18:09Kurt Metzger?

  Come on, man. I told you I'm trying to look back. That's why I wear, you know, do you know, okay. Here's why I wear sunglasses on this show.

• 18:17Duncan Trussell?

  Why?

• 18:19Kurt Metzger?

  I, guys, I know. Okay, I know you think I wear sunglasses on the show because I'm cool, but that's not why.

• 18:24Duncan Trussell?

  That's why, that's what I thought.

• 18:25Kurt Metzger?

  No, a lot of people thought that, but no.

• 18:27Duncan Trussell?

  Why?

• 18:28Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, on set yesterday of the pilot, not to brag, I don't know about my pilot being shot, but.

• 18:34Duncan Trussell?

  You have a pilot being shot?

• 18:36Kurt Metzger?

  I don't own it.

• 18:39Kurt Metzger?

  But it's, it's coming out good.

• 18:40Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 18:41Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, I told you, but.

• 18:42Duncan Trussell?

  For who? I know, I'm acting like you didn't tell me.

• 18:45Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, wait, well, we could talk about it in a minute, but I want to tell you this.

• 18:48Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 18:48Kurt Metzger?

  Jermaine topic, because I will forget, you know, because I've had a lot of legal Delta nine.

• 18:53Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 18:53Kurt Metzger?

  Um, and I want to get you the picture to look at, so.

• 18:59Kurt Metzger?

  Now, and I'm not bothered by this. I don't want you to think you're gonna be like, oh, what are you, a little bit bothered? And that's why you're bringing this up? So I'm just gonna hand it to you to look at.

• 19:09Kurt Metzger?

  And send it to Tanner. You tell me.

• 19:13Kurt Metzger?

  So Justin, the producer, saw me talking to Ryan Long, who's in the pilot.

• 19:17Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 19:18Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, he goes, "What was, what was Ryan telling you? You look absolutely shocked."

• 19:25Duncan Trussell?

  Let me see.

• 19:26Kurt Metzger?

  And, um, I couldn't remember, but I know I was not shocked and we were just talking normally.

• 19:32Duncan Trussell?

  Let's take a look at this.

• 19:33Kurt Metzger?

  Said it to Tanner, "Will you be the judge?"

• 19:37Kurt Metzger?

  Go ahead, take it.

• 19:40Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, my God.

• 19:44Duncan Trussell?

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• 20:29Duncan Trussell?

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• 21:14Duncan Trussell?

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• 21:56Duncan Trussell?

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• 22:40Duncan Trussell?

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• 23:20Duncan Trussell?

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• 24:00Duncan Trussell?

  Lucy products are only for adults of legal age and every customer is age verified. Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical.

• 24:21Duncan Trussell?

  Oh my God.

• 24:23Kurt Metzger?

  Did you get the picture of it, Tanner?

• 24:26Duncan Trussell?

  That is incredible.

• 24:27Kurt Metzger?

  Put it on the screen just to show, this is why I'm helping you guys out with, you know those creepy aliens that like probe you in your butt and they, but they have black eyes? That's not.

• 24:38Kurt Metzger?

  Let's.

• 24:40Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, I was just having a great conversation.

• 24:42Duncan Trussell?

  What did he tell you?

• 24:45Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, that's not him insulting me. That's a genuine question from Justin, the producer.

• 24:49Duncan Trussell?

  He just seems super calm.

• 24:51Kurt Metzger?

  That's my resting calm.

• 24:54Duncan Trussell?

  This is, this is just you listening.

• 24:56Kurt Metzger?

  Um, yes, I'm staring deeply into his eyes.

• 24:59Duncan Trussell?

  Holy shit, man.

• 25:00Kurt Metzger?

  Did you get it, Tanner?

• 25:04Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 25:05Kurt Metzger?

  Make it just a bit.

• 25:07Duncan Trussell?

  That's like, that's the look someone tells you they're your son or it's like he just told you you're related.

• 25:13Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, no, we were having, I think we were talking about something like crypto.

• 25:19Duncan Trussell?

  He's told you about.

• 25:20Kurt Metzger?

  I was like, oh, I look like he said something blew my mind.

• 25:22Duncan Trussell?

  Doge cone coin has gone down.

• 25:24Kurt Metzger?

  No, I'm in Doge cone now, though.

• 25:26Duncan Trussell?

  Doge cone, here's your fucking phone.

• 25:31Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 25:32Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, zoom in on my fucking, look at how lucky you are, I wear sunglasses on podcasts.

• 25:40Duncan Trussell?

  That is amazing.

• 25:41Kurt Metzger?

  Oh my god, yeah. Ever since I hurt my arm, I've been getting fat as hell too.

• 25:44Duncan Trussell?

  Look at your crew. That's a serious pilot you're shooting. You know, one picture you sent me, I showed Erin, my wife, and she rebuked you. She was like, "Call him." She wanted me to call you.

• 25:54Kurt Metzger?

  Can I tell you something crazy? The name of the show is Rebuke Me.

• 25:57Duncan Trussell?

  No, are you joking?

• 25:59Kurt Metzger?

  Starring Cecil St. Kerbskirt. Whatever the fuck I say I was. Yeah. Rebuke Me. And I go around on the street, daring people's wives to tell me I'm wrong.

• 26:07Duncan Trussell?

  Can I tell you?

• 26:08Kurt Metzger?

  Rebuke Me.

• 26:08Duncan Trussell?

  Can I tell you the picture you sent? Can I talk about it? It's like a cow. It looks like a well-made pentagram covered in blood.

• 26:16Kurt Metzger?

  No, Tanner made that. No, that's Tanner. He AI'd my legitimate pilot that I was in, edited as a real production, as you said. And then sent it to me like, "That's cool."

• 26:27Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 26:27Kurt Metzger?

  You know, my mother watches this, Tanner.

• 26:29Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, that wasn't from your pilot?

• 26:31Kurt Metzger?

  Not anymore after the one with the Libra vacation.

• 26:33Duncan Trussell?

  That thing you sent me wasn't from your pilot? The cow covered in blood and the pentagram?

• 26:39Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, okay, wait. Sorry. I apologize. It was from it, but it's not in the show. That's just, we were on lunch.

• 26:48Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, it's gonna be a hit, man.

• 26:49Kurt Metzger?

  I'm sorry, guys. Tanner, I apologize. That was just a picture of Crafty.

• 26:52Duncan Trussell?

  It's gonna be a hit.

• 26:54Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, is it Crafty hitting that fucking...

• 26:57Duncan Trussell?

  The cow looks disturbed.

• 26:58Kurt Metzger?

  This is Texas. If you're not gonna hit some cow at Crafty.

• 27:02Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, it's Texas. It's just pre-barbecue. Pentagram cow.

• 27:04Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, can we take my own? I still can't believe that they really have a perfect facsimile of my eyes and nose. They've actually spaced my eyes where they go and shrunk my nose a bit.

• 27:17Kurt Metzger?

  This is probably one of the hardest hitting comments I've ever received. I'm like, "How did you get my eyes where they are in relation to my nose?"

• 27:30Kurt Metzger?

  How did you get it exactly right?

• 27:31Duncan Trussell?

  It's amazing.

• 27:32Kurt Metzger?

  And then, could I do me a favor and shrink the nostrils down a little bit?

• 27:35Duncan Trussell?

  Well done.

• 27:37Kurt Metzger?

  All right. Well, I want to thank the good, uh...

• 27:40Duncan Trussell?

  R. Kelly's doo-doo butter?

• 27:42Kurt Metzger?

  I think the R. Kelly doo-doo butter, I think it's probably silent. Or, uh, Riley doo-doo butter, the K is probably silent.

• 27:48Duncan Trussell?

  This is really good. I'm glad we're bringing this up. Thank you, BrightEyes6409. I'm glad to address this finally.

• 27:54Kurt Metzger?

  This is, this rumor's been out for a while.

• 27:57Duncan Trussell?

  I heard Duncan and Teal play Twister in lizard costumes with an open crotch.

• 28:01Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, the world's been asking.

• 28:03Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 28:03Kurt Metzger?

  We're answering now, first on the mystery.

• 28:06Duncan Trussell?

  I really want to address this whole Peter Teal thing. Uh, it's floated around the internet that I am, have some allegiance to Peter Teal. And I, here's what it is, guys. We play Dungeons and Dragons together. We've been in the same D and D group ever since I lived in LA. Part of D and D, if you really get into it, is cosplay, right? And so...

• 28:27Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, what? Oh, drugs and drag, absolutely right.

• 28:30Duncan Trussell?

  Dungeons and Dragons. And part of it is, we, one of these campaigns we are in, we are having to fight kobolds. Can you pull up kobold, please? Just so we can address this. D and D kobold, kobold.

• 28:42Kurt Metzger?

  Hmm.

• 28:43Duncan Trussell?

  It's with a K, Tanner. What the fuck? K O B O L D. Okay.

• 28:50Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, Tanner, can you read?

• 28:51Duncan Trussell?

  I just need to clear this up.

• 28:53Kurt Metzger?

  Can you write?

• 28:54Duncan Trussell?

  Kobold. Not bald, kobold. And then image.

• 28:58Kurt Metzger?

  There's so many searches, I just, I don't...

• 29:00Duncan Trussell?

  So, there you go. That's a kobold. And so, yes, we did dress like...

• 29:05Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, is this furry porn? Cause I, I'm not, I, I'm, I'm healed of that by the love of God.

• 29:09Duncan Trussell?

  You know, honestly, like, you can, all the offensive things, all the offensive things you say, I don't mind, but please don't make fun of D and D.

• 29:17Kurt Metzger?

  That is sexual. I know porn when I see it. I am boned the fuck up.

• 29:20Duncan Trussell?

  It's, it is erotic, but it doesn't mean that it's porn.

• 29:23Kurt Metzger?

  What is the definition of pornography? I don't know, but if I'm boned up, I know you're trying to fuck me.

• 29:27Duncan Trussell?

  I drew that one. Look at her feet, the one to the left, right there. That's my art.

• 29:31Kurt Metzger?

  Wait a minute, these are porns, right? I'm, I mean, I don't...

• 29:34Duncan Trussell?

  No, this is just art, normal art.

• 29:35Kurt Metzger?

  You think that's just nor, that is not...

• 29:37Duncan Trussell?

  It's incredible art. This is why we need to stop AI art.

• 29:40Kurt Metzger?

  Wow, look at this thick ass fucking...

• 29:42Duncan Trussell?

  This is good art. This wasn't generated by a computer.

• 29:45Kurt Metzger?

  Whoa, look at this, hey, you like a thick ass goblin shorty?

• 29:47Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. Anyway, the point is, kobolds...

• 29:50Kurt Metzger?

  You know these goblin shorties? You don't talk about it.

• 29:52Duncan Trussell?

  They're hot. And they don't...

• 29:54Kurt Metzger?

  You ever go full goblin mode, guys? In the booth?

• 29:57Duncan Trussell?

  Who doesn't?

• 29:58Kurt Metzger?

  Goblin mode.

• 29:58Duncan Trussell?

  You gotta go goblin mode.

• 29:59Kurt Metzger?

  You know what I'm talking about?

• 30:00Duncan Trussell?

  Goblin summer.

• 30:02Kurt Metzger?

  Tanner, do you understand what goblin mode is? Do you do it?

• 30:07Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, sometimes.

• 30:08Kurt Metzger?

  What is it then? I feel like you're trying to fit in because you're being peer pressured to.

• 30:13Duncan Trussell?

  Go ahead Tanner, what is it?

• 30:14Kurt Metzger?

  But don't feel nervous, but your job's on the line. I mean, in fact, it matters to you.

• 30:19Duncan Trussell?

  What's Goblin Mode?

• 30:19Kurt Metzger?

  What is Goblin Mode? That you said you are into?

• 30:23Duncan Trussell?

  Tanner?

• 30:26Duncan Trussell?

  Well, it got quiet back there.

• 30:28Kurt Metzger?

  You don't ever heard of Goblin Mode?

• 30:32Kurt Metzger?

  Can I call you Tan? Tan.

• 30:36Kurt Metzger?

  Goblin Mode.

• 30:39Kurt Metzger?

  I notice you're not searching it usually.

• 30:41Duncan Trussell?

  I'm not, I'm not.

• 30:42Kurt Metzger?

  Usually you're searching every other word that no one asks you to do, but now, suddenly, Goblin Mode comes up, you're not doing a search.

• 30:49Duncan Trussell?

  Quiet, no searching.

• 30:50Kurt Metzger?

  But you are leaving it on the pornography.

• 30:52Duncan Trussell?

  It's not porn. Stop calling it pornography.

• 30:55Kurt Metzger?

  Look, I solve mysteries, that's what I do, Dan. Okay, if you're gonna leave all these, uh, big meatballs hanging out there.

• 31:03Duncan Trussell?

  What is it Tanner?

• 31:05Duncan Trussell?

  Just tearing it up.

• 31:11Duncan Trussell?

  What'd you say?

• 31:12Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, I'm having to continue because that's such a great line for our line of merch, just tearing it up.

• 31:17Duncan Trussell?

  Just tearing it up.

• 31:19Kurt Metzger?

  So you know what Tanner? You're off the hook on this one.

• 31:23Duncan Trussell?

  Well done.

• 31:24Kurt Metzger?

  Just tearing it up.

• 31:25Duncan Trussell?

  Just tearing it up!

• 31:29Kurt Metzger?

  Also steal one of these designs for it. Okay, let's, what?

• 31:32Duncan Trussell?

  Just tearing it up.

• 31:33Kurt Metzger?

  We're answering comments. Is that all the comments? There's gotta be some more than that.

• 31:39Duncan Trussell?

  The answer is yes, by the way. That's true, but.

• 31:42Kurt Metzger?

  Duncan, wait, didn't we have another simple, oh, we've been getting Sense Upon It's Kurt Shines? Now, is this two different, I, by the way, we have no context as to when these comments were left, what they pertain to, and good work people, because I told you, don't try to do that. Don't try to lock us into time and space. You're just gonna get your feelings hurt. Like the Tan man.

• 32:03Duncan Trussell?

  Sense Upon It says, Sense Upon It's.

• 32:06Kurt Metzger?

  I shine?

• 32:07Duncan Trussell?

  An expert on gay everything says.

• 32:11Kurt Metzger?

  Yo.

• 32:12Duncan Trussell?

  He's got a PhD in gay.

• 32:17Duncan Trussell?

  He's a gay anthropologist.

• 32:20Kurt Metzger?

  He grows like the gayest strain of weed that I would like, since he farts.

• 32:25Duncan Trussell?

  He's the David Attenborough of gays.

• 32:27Kurt Metzger?

  He looks like a young David Attenborough.

• 32:29Duncan Trussell?

  Cowboys.

• 32:31Kurt Metzger?

  If I knew what that meant, I would have such a feeling about it right now.

• 32:35Duncan Trussell?

  I think it's beautiful. It sounds like a Willie Nelson song.

• 32:39Kurt Metzger?

  It sounds, honest to God, you tell me if I'm wrong about this. It sounds like one of the songs on the compulsory U2 album on my phone that I can't erase.

• 32:51Kurt Metzger?

  That's one of the songs. You know the album where it's a man blowing on another man's belly?

• 32:56Duncan Trussell?

  No.

• 32:56Kurt Metzger?

  And it's in your iPhone and you have to get like a bone marrow transplant to remove it?

• 33:00Duncan Trussell?

  I don't have that in my iPhone. What is that? You have, what do you mean?

• 33:06Kurt Metzger?

  You guys know what I'm talking about, right? There it is, the mandatory. Yeah, Songs of Innocence.

• 33:13Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, right, when they gave you that.

• 33:15Kurt Metzger?

  Song five, "Curb Shines for Gay Cowboys." Well, they didn't give it to you, it was mandatory. They just put it on your phone. Put in mandatory U2 album. Or not mandatory, but that album, because people, if you recall, were upset back then, because they're, people are so stupid.

• 33:30Duncan Trussell?

  In September 2014, Apple and U2 forced the band's album, Songs of Innocence.

• 33:36Kurt Metzger?

  The AI is putting it that way.

• 33:37Duncan Trussell?

  Onto the iTunes accounts of over 500 million users. Users were upset because the album automatically downloaded to their devices, consumed limited. Relax! And was initially impossible to delete.

• 33:51Kurt Metzger?

  The massive backlash, wait, look, keep going, look, look, look, the massive backlash.

• 33:56Duncan Trussell?

  Steamed from a few key issues. No consent.

• 33:59Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, so, basically, um, go back up, go back up, look, it says, uh, uh, they forced the band's song, so it's basically, uh, people's phones were, uh, grape'd, if I can put it in algorithmic terms.

• 34:14Duncan Trussell?

  Tell, uh, Apple paid U2 $100 million.

• 34:18Kurt Metzger?

  They shouldn't have named the album "No Consent," and that would have been pretty funny, and people would have been like, I get it, that's good.

• 34:23Duncan Trussell?

  Bono, Bono, what do you say, Bono? Bono ultimately took the blame, acknowledging it as a vaunting ambition to give their music away and formally apologized.

• 34:33Kurt Metzger?

  It's not really, can we get his quote? Because I remember he had a particularly amazing quote about it, and, and, I, I, yeah.

• 34:42Speaker 04

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• 35:41Kurt Metzger?

  Lead issue, yeah, look at that. Oh my god. He apologized, he goes, can you please never release?

• 35:48Duncan Trussell?

  Oops, I'm sorry about that. Tear it up, said Bono, from behind blue-tinted spectacles while the other band members giggled at the question.

• 35:58Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I hope this is a serious answer from Mr. Bono.

• 36:00Duncan Trussell?

  I had this beautiful idea and we kind of got carried away with ourselves. Artists are prone to that kind of thing. You see, in that image, this man had a belly full of cum. And it was a cum listener, listening to... Alright, I'm sorry.

• 36:14Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, that's not what he said.

• 36:15Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, alright, I didn't read it right.

• 36:17Kurt Metzger?

  We don't need to put words in his mouth as if it were common, you know, Irish rock band cum.

• 36:23Duncan Trussell?

  Drop of megalomania, touch of generosity.

• 36:26Kurt Metzger?

  He's at, you know what?

• 36:27Duncan Trussell?

  Dash of self-promotion, and a deep fear that these songs that we poured our life into over the last few years, mightn't be heard. There's a lot of noise out there, I guess we got a little noisy ourselves to get through it.

• 36:41Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, I've never heard rare language used.

• 36:43Duncan Trussell?

  That is so fucked up.

• 36:44Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, just so you know, giving something away is like, free, it says free and you click on it.

• 36:51Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 36:52Kurt Metzger?

  Putting it on your phone with Tim Cook to see, to test your boundaries?

• 36:56Duncan Trussell?

  Fucked up.

• 36:57Kurt Metzger?

  Like, their album was a form of digital grooming.

• 36:59Duncan Trussell?

  Oops, I got a little carried away when I climbed through your window.

• 37:02Kurt Metzger?

  But who could say no to this guy? Oh, he's writing, Danny Elfman and Bono, what's?

• 37:06Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 37:07Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, this is one of, uh... Tanner's going down one of his rabbit holes again. What do you think the relationship is? By the way, why does Danny Elfman look like Alan Dershowitz in that picture?

• 37:21Kurt Metzger?

  We go back to him and Bridget Fonda, his formerly hot wife Bridget Fonda.

• 37:27Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, and then now he's, look at that, it looks like Alan Dershowitz.

• 37:30Duncan Trussell?

  That is so weird. Can we pull up Dershowitz real quick, just so people could see how these things happen?

• 37:36Kurt Metzger?

  Let's bring up the Dersch. That's that Danny Elfman grin.

• 37:42Kurt Metzger?

  Oingo boingo.

• 37:45Duncan Trussell?

  That's so weird.

• 37:46Kurt Metzger?

  Go back to Danny Elfman, or like show him a little bit side by side, so we could see.

• 37:51Duncan Trussell?

  Very weird.

• 37:52Kurt Metzger?

  You know, initially I was gonna say it was weird for Danny Elfman to grow his weird orange clown hair out. But I was wrong, because he looks too much like Alan Dershowitz, if isn't have long. I mean, my goodness, gingers truly are nature's clowns, aren't they?

• 38:08Duncan Trussell?

  Ah, that's what they say.

• 38:10Kurt Metzger?

  That's why I think, I'd like to get this guy as a guest. He has a book called The Nephilim Look Like Clowns. Okay, and there was that ginger giant Afghanistan story and all that. But the guy, and I'm not trashing him, because I like his, I like his work. But I just want to point this out to him. It sounds like I'm being insulting, and I'm not being insulting. But I know it, I shouldn't even say it.

• 38:31Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 38:32Kurt Metzger?

  Well, he's really a redhead, okay? And he has a book called The Nephilim Look Like Clowns.

• 38:36Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 38:37Kurt Metzger?

  And so, following the principle of how gingers are, you know, God's clowns.

• 38:42Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 38:43Kurt Metzger?

  And I'm, now this is the serious part, I'm asking for real. So the modern, you know, the clown that's all goofy with all those colors coming from India? I got it from his research, which is great. Clowns used to look like, yes.

• 38:55Kurt Metzger?

  Paul Stabs, okay. He's the one, by the way, when I was talking about parasites in a future or past episode. Paul Stabs guessed parasites before a guy told me parasites. So don't think that his handicap of being a ginger is something that I'm trying to trash you for. But, so, the concept of clowns, see the red nose and red lips?

• 39:16Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 39:17Kurt Metzger?

  It comes from India, that version of clowns. European clowns didn't look like that until there was the.

• 39:24Duncan Trussell?

  Fuck.

• 39:27Kurt Metzger?

  I'm sorry, Paul. I told you.

• 39:29Duncan Trussell?

  It's like you just had a stroke or something.

• 39:31Kurt Metzger?

  Because I-

• 39:32Duncan Trussell?

  I don't know what you're saying, man!

• 39:33Kurt Metzger?

  Because I'm not trying to curse a clown, okay, Paul? Paul, hear me out before you curse me again. Please. So, okay, it comes from India, that idea?

• 39:42Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 39:43Kurt Metzger?

  Is it possible, Duncan, that the, uh, what you see as a clown is an Indian? A deep Southeast Asian Indian's person's view of a white ginger person? The way, the, the way blackface and minstrel shows?

• 39:57Duncan Trussell?

  I gotcha.

• 39:58Kurt Metzger?

  So if you look at minstrel show makeup, it's someone's caricature of black people.

• 40:02Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 40:03Kurt Metzger?

  If you're Indian, and we know Indians are racist, or else Trump wouldn't have let so many come in, um, do you think that's Indians doing blackface of white redheads? Since they're so- I'm just, seriously?

• 40:16Duncan Trussell?

  I got it now.

• 40:17Kurt Metzger?

  I-

• 40:18Duncan Trussell?

  Oh my god!

• 40:19Kurt Metzger?

  Paul! Paul, I'm sorry, Paul!

• 40:23Duncan Trussell?

  How is the whole-

• 40:23Kurt Metzger?

  Put Paul's pic- put Paul's pictures up, picture up. I want you to see who just did that. But you see, I'm trying to make a real point, and Paul Stubbs just called- put Paul's picture. Paul, no, Paul! I, I, I'm friends with lots of people that look like you. Please stop cursing the production with your fucking-

• 40:41Duncan Trussell?

  I'm scared.

• 40:42Kurt Metzger?

  Freckle powers.

• 40:44Duncan Trussell?

  You're getting psychically attacked right now, man.

• 40:46Kurt Metzger?

  You know, Paul, you say you're a Christian, but you just psychically attacked our succulents.

• 40:51Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, wow.

• 40:52Kurt Metzger?

  Is that a succulent? I mean, so imagine you're an Indian person- leave that picture there. Imagine you're in deep, deep, dark-ass India, when I- you know what I'm saying?

• 41:01Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 41:02Kurt Metzger?

  And then this, it's almost like an alien encounter.

• 41:05Duncan Trussell?

  You see your first red hair.

• 41:06Kurt Metzger?

  This guy, this British redhead just comes strolling in. And you're telling me you're not gonna make festivals dedicated to his coloring?

• 41:13Duncan Trussell?

  Right, yeah, it makes sense. Mystery solved. Clowns come from redheads in India.

• 41:20Kurt Metzger?

  I, I, I, I think we solved another mystery boy mystery.

• 41:23Duncan Trussell?

  That's incredible.

• 41:27Kurt Metzger?

  And, and you saw the magical attacks from Paul?

• 41:29Duncan Trussell?

  I saw, everyone saw it.

• 41:31Kurt Metzger?

  Like, dude, people don't believe me this shit's real, but you saw that.

• 41:34Duncan Trussell?

  Your white claw.

• 41:35Kurt Metzger?

  Look at, look at, the white claw's bent.

• 41:36Duncan Trussell?

  It got crushed.

• 41:38Kurt Metzger?

  The white claw's bent. If we had a, one of those meters they use?

• 41:40Duncan Trussell?

  Fuck.

• 41:41Kurt Metzger?

  We could tell the exact radiation that caused that.

• 41:44Duncan Trussell?

  It got colder in the room. My white claw got colder.

• 41:47Kurt Metzger?

  Well, it wasn't a cooler. I don't want to put it all in.

• 41:49Duncan Trussell?

  Oh.

• 41:50Kurt Metzger?

  But, if you can knock a plant over and spill my white claw, Paul?

• 41:54Duncan Trussell?

  I've never seen a full-on psychic attack before. That was wild.

• 41:56Kurt Metzger?

  I like it. By the way, his, his thing about parasites, he was the first guy I ever heard to say, like, why do you, maybe demons are parasites?

• 42:04Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 42:05Kurt Metzger?

  Because they're ugly and if you fast, you could kill the parasite?

• 42:08Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 42:08Kurt Metzger?

  First guy didn't say that.

• 42:10Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 42:10Kurt Metzger?

  To give him credit. So I like his work. So for him, a supposed Christian, he used black ma- well, not black magic, he's a ginger. Although if you rearrange it, uh, come on. I'm not gonna resort to, to old jokes, cause I'm angry that I was attacked by peppermint magic in my own studio.

• 42:28Duncan Trussell?

  Just rebuke it, baby.

• 42:29Kurt Metzger?

  But Paul, I'm gonna have to rebuke you for what you did.

• 42:33Duncan Trussell?

  You're rebuked. You got rebuked.

• 42:35Kurt Metzger?

  And, and, and I would love to have him on the show and buke him. Reverse the rebuking.

• 42:39Duncan Trussell?

  When you rebuke, do you feel something come out of your body?

• 42:43Kurt Metzger?

  No, when I buke.

• 42:44Duncan Trussell?

  Oh.

• 42:45Kurt Metzger?

  But sometimes I rebuke after that.

• 42:47Duncan Trussell?

  You have to rebuke.

• 42:47Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah. Okay.

• 42:50Duncan Trussell?

  Well, we've covered a lot of ground.

• 42:51Kurt Metzger?

  We've solved a lot of mysteries. Okay, so, you've got, uh, uh, secret, secret space serviceman Daryl, uh, James's number. I think we can put on headphones for this, correct?

• 43:03Duncan Trussell?

  Let's do it, man. I'm so excited about this. Wait, where did this guy come from?

• 43:09Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, where'd that come from, Tanner? I just threw that away like two days ago in the dumpster back, in the back.

• 43:13Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, little guy here. That's so cool, man.

• 43:17Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, wait, let me see that.

• 43:18Duncan Trussell?

  I didn't even notice this.

• 43:19Kurt Metzger?

  I just threw that away, dude.

• 43:20Duncan Trussell?

  No, you didn't. Why'd you throw me away anyway? I'm your friend!

• 43:26Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, sorry, I did not. That's a totally different dummy I threw away.

• 43:29Duncan Trussell?

  Oh.

• 43:30Kurt Metzger?

  I'm sorry, and I'm not being insulting, but your people look alike to me.

• 43:33Duncan Trussell?

  What is that supposed to mean?

• 43:36Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, you heard what I fucking said, you little fuck?

• 43:39Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, I heard what you said. Maybe you didn't hear what I said. What's that supposed to mean?

• 43:43Kurt Metzger?

  Wait a minute, did you fucking do that shit and I just blame Paul Stabs, the ginger author of that book for? Yo, I just made a serious fucking accusation of ginger magic. Worse than black magic.

• 43:54Duncan Trussell?

  Who is this? Who's this puppet? Did you really bring this puppet here?

• 43:56Kurt Metzger?

  You think I hang out with fucking-

• 43:57Duncan Trussell?

  I don't know what you do!

• 44:00Kurt Metzger?

  Who are you here with?

• 44:01Duncan Trussell?

  Wh- what?

• 44:03Kurt Metzger?

  Who the fuck are you here with?

• 44:04Duncan Trussell?

  It doesn't matter, you-

• 44:05Kurt Metzger?

  Are you one of Tanner's friends?

• 44:07Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, Tanner's my friend.

• 44:09Kurt Metzger?

  Tanner, is this one of your friends from school?

• 44:11Duncan Trussell?

  We got, we like to tear it up.

• 44:15Kurt Metzger?

  Right, he talks like one of Tanner's friends. What, what were you guys getting up to? Oh, gooning with your friends?

• 44:21Duncan Trussell?

  We love to goon!

• 44:22Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, getting bussin' haircuts and-

• 44:23Duncan Trussell?

  We're in a gooning group! Gooning simps of Austin!

• 44:29Kurt Metzger?

  Cut, listen.

• 44:30Duncan Trussell?

  You vape like a gay!

• 44:32Kurt Metzger?

  I'm sorry.

• 44:32Duncan Trussell?

  What the fuck? Fuck you!

• 44:34Kurt Metzger?

  Tanner, what is your, what is your friend's name? What's his name?

• 44:37Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 44:38Kurt Metzger?

  What, you're, Tanner's friend, what is your name?

• 44:41Speaker 06

  Buster.

• 44:42Duncan Trussell?

  Buster Buddy!

• 44:43Kurt Metzger?

  Oh wow, one of those fucking common-

• 44:45Duncan Trussell?

  I ride on a train car up through the country, I like to goon with my friends!

• 44:52Kurt Metzger?

  Great, a zoomer name and now he's singing his fucking, that rapper, you can't understand it.

• 44:56Duncan Trussell?

  They call me a hobo, but I'm just a gooner with no money but lots of friends. What the fuck? I don't like him, man. Tanner, this guy's messed up.

• 45:06Kurt Metzger?

  Dude, I don't understand these kids' music now. I don't understand their stupid names.

• 45:09Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, well.

• 45:11Kurt Metzger?

  What grade are you in with Tanner Buster? I mean, we might as well get-

• 45:14Duncan Trussell?

  Me and Tanner!

• 45:14Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I guess might as well delay the whole show once again.

• 45:18Duncan Trussell?

  I can't, I-

• 45:20Kurt Metzger?

  To help this fucking boy.

• 45:21Duncan Trussell?

  I can't wait for the comments here. Did you see what he did? Did you see what Dunky did?

• 45:24Kurt Metzger?

  Hey, sorry, audience, that we got a simp for Tanner because he, one of his drug friends broke in the studio.

• 45:31Duncan Trussell?

  His, my chin's broken, by the way. I've been on fin all day, my chin's frozen up.

• 45:35Kurt Metzger?

  You know Buster, uh, do you think it's right to frame a man for your crimes?

• 45:39Duncan Trussell?

  Well-

• 45:39Kurt Metzger?

  Even if he is ginger. Now, I'll grant you Buster, that was a ginger. And obviously, that doesn't count the same as blaming a different colored innocent man. But it's still not cool and it's still not right.

• 45:49Duncan Trussell?

  Well, not all gingers are bad. I love Louis CK!

• 45:53Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I lo- I love him too, actually.

• 45:55Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, I know! I love him. Why are you acting all weird about it?

• 45:58Kurt Metzger?

  I'm not, I feel like you're acting weird.

• 46:00Duncan Trussell?

  I'm not acting weird!

• 46:01Kurt Metzger?

  Yo.

• 46:02Duncan Trussell?

  You want a goon?

• 46:05Duncan Trussell?

  Sometimes when you're going with a dude, it just relaxes you, it connects you.

• 46:10Kurt Metzger?

  Oh my god. Uh, I don't, Tanner, I don't think you're a good influence on this guy Buster.

• 46:15Duncan Trussell?

  Tanner's great, his dick tastes like cinnamon.

• 46:22Duncan Trussell?

  He uses Dr. Bronner's cinnamon dick soap.

• 46:24Kurt Metzger?

  You know Tanner, are you telling me you're taking advantage of a smaller kid at your school?

• 46:29Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 46:30Kurt Metzger?

  I don't even want to tell this kid what you did to him.

• 46:32Duncan Trussell?

  Look at the size of my mouth.

• 46:35Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I, this is like, you know, first John of, the John of God thing.

• 46:40Duncan Trussell?

  Is that a fuckable mouth?

• 46:43Kurt Metzger?

  Uh.

• 46:44Duncan Trussell?

  Tanner's dick almost fills it all the way up.

• 46:50Kurt Metzger?

  Wow.

• 46:52Duncan Trussell?

  Alright, what the fuck? Get out of here, puppet.

• 46:54Kurt Metzger?

  Okay Tanner, in the future.

• 46:56Duncan Trussell?

  Fuck you, fuck off! I don't like him. Let's keep him off the show.

• 47:00Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, he seemed like he was wired on, uh, he's on the fent.

• 47:03Duncan Trussell?

  He's juiced up on the fent.

• 47:05Kurt Metzger?

  He's on fentanyl?

• 47:07Duncan Trussell?

  I don't know, he said fent.

• 47:07Kurt Metzger?

  Where are they taking out these kids?

• 47:09Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 47:09Kurt Metzger?

  What are the drugs your kids take now, Tanner?

• 47:11Duncan Trussell?

  Fentanyl!

• 47:13Duncan Trussell?

  Um, so, look, we, we were rudely interrupted by this idiot puppet when we have another phone call scheduled.

• 47:21Kurt Metzger?

  This is why I say we gotta bring back the draft.

• 47:24Duncan Trussell?

  Absolutely. I'm all for that, by the way.

• 47:26Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, let's call Daryl, let's, right now, we're gonna talk to, and, and I hope you pay attention to this Tanner, because we're gonna talk to a veteran. I know that your life has been pretty wayward. I don't know what you do. Uh, I don't know what you're gonna do. I know you're hanging out with, uh, smaller kids and coercing them into sexual acts. I know that's not the answer.

• 47:44Duncan Trussell?

  You're banging puppets. You're banging puppets. You could be helping this country.

• 47:50Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, you, uh, wow. You know, you are a saint, Saint Frank.

• 47:54Duncan Trussell?

  Thank you, thank you so much.

• 47:56Kurt Metzger?

  By the way, you know my real friend, Crank Williams, uh, you remind me of?

• 47:59Duncan Trussell?

  Crank Williams?

• 48:00Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, that, well, that was his meth name, but, um, uh, yeah, Crank Williams.

• 48:04Duncan Trussell?

  You have a friend named Crank, for real?

• 48:06Kurt Metzger?

  Well, it's a biker name.

• 48:07Duncan Trussell?

  That's cool.

• 48:08Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, I haven't seen him in a while. Shout out to, uh, Crank Williams.

• 48:10Duncan Trussell?

  What's up, Crank?

• 48:11Kurt Metzger?

  I'm not saying his real name, but... But, uh, yeah. When you said Saint Crank, I, I, I might as well have boy Crank Williams.

• 48:18Duncan Trussell?

  Weird.

• 48:18Kurt Metzger?

  Shot 308 rifles with him.

• 48:19Duncan Trussell?

  A little synchronicity.

• 48:20Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 48:21Duncan Trussell?

  Or maybe it isn't.

• 48:22Kurt Metzger?

  All right, let's call Daryl James because, uh, this has been a really emotional episode so far.

• 48:26Duncan Trussell?

  It's been intense, emotional.

• 48:28Speaker 06

  You need, uh, headphones for the call.

• 48:30Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, yeah, yes, thank you. Let's, let's have a tinkle and then call him.

• 48:34Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, let's have a poo poo.

• 48:35Kurt Metzger?

  Well, okay, listen.

• 48:38Duncan Trussell?

  Let's have a poo poo.

• 48:40Kurt Metzger?

  Um, listen, we gotta take a quick.

• 48:43Duncan Trussell?

  Poop.

• 48:44Kurt Metzger?

  A quick poop?

• 48:49Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, bring, uh, Tanner's friend with us.

• 48:51Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, yeah. I don't wanna go to the bathroom with you guys.

• 48:55Kurt Metzger?

  No, you're hanging out with the big dog.

• 48:56Duncan Trussell?

  I know, I'm okay, I don't need to go.

• 48:58Kurt Metzger?

  You're the man now, dog.

• 48:59Duncan Trussell?

  You're gonna go, you're gonna go with the big dogs and have a little poo poo. I don't wanna have a poo poo. I just wanna go back to sleep. Tanner!

• 49:08Kurt Metzger?

  You see what happens, Tanner?

• 49:10Duncan Trussell?

  Tanner! Come on, Tanner! I don't wanna go to poo poo with him.

• 49:16Kurt Metzger?

  You probably promised you'd leave together, now look.

• 49:18Duncan Trussell?

  All right, let's go, come on. Let's go. I don't wanna go! I don't wanna go! Tanner!

• 49:25Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, cut the fucking camera.

• 49:27Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, cut the fucking camera, dude, seriously.

• 49:29Kurt Metzger?

  The fuck's wrong with you?

• 49:30Duncan Trussell?

  Turn that off.

• 49:31Kurt Metzger?

  We're gonna take a quick.

• 49:32Duncan Trussell?

  No, turn off the fucking camera, man! Hey, no! Hey! He was in the Epstein files, for real!

• 49:39Kurt Metzger?

  We're gonna have a nice.

• 49:40Duncan Trussell?

  Cut the fucking camera.

• 49:41Kurt Metzger?

  We're gonna have a nice poop.

• 49:42Duncan Trussell?

  It's okay, we're just gonna go poo poo.

• 49:43Kurt Metzger?

  Hey, everybody's okay.

• 49:44Duncan Trussell?

  You don't wanna go poo poo?

• 49:46Kurt Metzger?

  Hey, Buster had a little few too many claws, it's fine.

• 49:48Duncan Trussell?

  Buster's gonna fuck!

• 49:49Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, don't worry, we're gonna, everybody's gonna be.

• 49:51Duncan Trussell?

  Shut the fuck up, just shut the fuck up.

• 49:53Kurt Metzger?

  Cut that fucking camera! Tanner!

• 49:59Duncan Trussell?

  Phew, that was a good piss.

• 50:06Duncan Trussell?

  Woo!

• 50:07Kurt Metzger?

  Oh.

• 50:09Kurt Metzger?

  Woo! Alright, let's uh, let's talk to uh, uh, Daryl uh...

• 50:16Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 50:18Kurt Metzger?

  Let's talk to Daryl James.

• 50:19Duncan Trussell?

  I can't wait to hear this story.

• 50:20Kurt Metzger?

  I don't know, man. I, I feel like I had a great show so far. Daryl! Hey, Daryl!

• 50:26Speaker 07

  Hey!

• 50:26Kurt Metzger?

  So, Daryl, when we left off, we were talking about how you fucked up your first day by poking that, do you remember this Duncan?

• 50:33Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, I do.

• 50:34Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 50:34Duncan Trussell?

  But maybe for people who maybe missed the last episode, let's...

• 50:37Kurt Metzger?

  So, Daryl James, the reason I got into, uh, basically, I, I feel confident saying solving mysteries for a living, spooky mysteries, is because while I was looking up some UFO shit for a joke, I stumbled on a Daryl story. His story is so, like, fascinatingly batshit where like, I swear to God, I don't think Daryl's lying. Like, regardless of whether all that should have, there's no way to really tell at the end of the day because of the tech they have to put anything in your fucking head, but it's just like little things about his story sound real to me, dude. You know what I'm saying?

• 51:09Duncan Trussell?

  They be tales.

• 51:10Kurt Metzger?

  But, well, you know, he could be making it up. I don't really give a shit. It's, it's actually one of the best stories I've ever heard in my life. So, uh, when we left off though, and this is why I like his story, because he fucked up and got punished his first day for poking a lizard man in the eye.

• 51:23Duncan Trussell?

  Right. Right.

• 51:25Kurt Metzger?

  And um, did you, okay, so this is what I want to get to. You end up, you went to the moon for that, right? Did you have to go serve that right away? Or did you go do something else and then you had to go do that?

• 51:36Speaker 07

  Yeah, immediately, I, I went to the moon. It was like, I think it was like three months, he told me. I, I asked my XO for like a timeline. And I asked how long I was on the moon, and it was three months. And yeah, I was actually supposed to stay there for my entire 20 years and they weren't gonna wipe my memory.

• 51:55Kurt Metzger?

  They're gonna leave you with moon mem- dude, that's, this is what I love about these. So wait, just so Duncan understands, because I was telling before, like, so it's like, uh, what were you mining, first of all? Was it helium 3? Am I misremembering that?

• 52:09Speaker 07

  I mean, I, I really don't matter. I really don't remember. I just remember like, you know, taking the long, you know, pipes, kind of like, uh, like the Roughnecks do, like the oil drillers and just putting a new pipe in and putting a new pipe in. I remember doing that.

• 52:21Duncan Trussell?

  Was it easier to, to lay pipe on the moon because the?

• 52:26Kurt Metzger?

  No, that's how they paid them.

• 52:27Duncan Trussell?

  But I mean, the gravity difference, did it, did it feel different from putting down regular?

• 52:31Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, okay, wait, wait. Okay, let me isolate. That's a good question. Did the moon gravity seem accurate to how it was described to you like growing up? Or what was different about the moon than, if anything, than you had heard?

• 52:42Speaker 07

  I don't remember it being any different, but I remember like speaking to a woman that I was with that was actually on the base. And she got, was on the moon and she was a nurse and I was with her for a while. And, you know, I was intimate with her and I, I asked her, I said, aren't you worried about, you know, becoming pregnant in this kind of situation?

• 53:00Speaker 07

  And she said, well, I'm inside the moon, so it doesn't affect me here. So I, I, I think, I don't remember at all.

• 53:07Duncan Trussell?

  I, I've heard that. I've heard this before.

• 53:08Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, what? What does that mean?

• 53:10Duncan Trussell?

  I've heard you can't get pregnant on the moon.

• 53:11Kurt Metzger?

  In the moon, not on it. In, right?

• 53:13Duncan Trussell?

  I heard on or in.

• 53:15Speaker 07

  Yeah, it's, well, it was, she said that the, the moon itself, you know, because it regulates women's menstruation. Women shouldn't really menstruate in the way that they do, but the, it's artificially done to them by the moon, by the phases of the moon and things. The moon itself does it.

• 53:30Duncan Trussell?

  What, wait, when you're, when a woman is on the moon, does she have her, um, period?

• 53:37Speaker 07

  No, no, she completely, she like could regulate it with a smart glass pad. Like she had tech in her body and she could reg- regulate like her eggs.

• 53:42Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, what's this? What is that? A smart glass pad? Because before we called you on the live show, I was showing Duncan this thing called Cambrian genomics, where you're gonna be able to program like your pussy smell. And, and, uh, so the smart glass pack, you described it, Duncan, and what, what, was it nineties when you're seeing this? But also the future, I guess.

• 54:01Speaker 07

  No, two thousand, well, two thousand four is when I got into the program. But, you know, when my XO was explaining it to me, he said, the first ET tech you're gonna see is, uh, the smartphone. And it's based off the smart glass pad. And it's kind of like a more primitive version of the smart glass pad, but it, basically it's just something that I would put my palm, my fingers on it and then it would, you know, my, on each, you know, I put my finger on each corner of it. And it would just turn on and it would, it would just kind of read your thoughts. It was a telepathic machine. It created like a link with you.

• 54:31Kurt Metzger?

  Do you know the phones can do that now?

• 54:34Duncan Trussell?

  Say again?

• 54:35Kurt Metzger?

  The phones now can do that and like-

• 54:38Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, have you ever done that or even like thought about like a vacation or something like that?

• 54:42Kurt Metzger?

  My girlfriend happens to a lot now. I have not experienced it myself. I've had the thing where you're talking about something and it pops on the screen because you're being spied on every second of the day. But, and I think she, I think I could be wrong, but when she did it, she was wearing the wired earbuds and, but I can't imagine if they could do with wired earbuds.

• 55:01Duncan Trussell?

  Why?

• 55:01Kurt Metzger?

  Shirley could do it with the other kind of earbuds.

• 55:03Duncan Trussell?

  You know what? Our viewers could help us solve this mystery.

• 55:06Kurt Metzger?

  A lot of people have had this happen.

• 55:07Duncan Trussell?

  This is a technique that you use, what you do, you don't even write it down. You have to somehow think of something that you normally would never think of.

• 55:16Kurt Metzger?

  I think you gotta have the phone near you. So, I don't think-

• 55:19Duncan Trussell?

  I did the experiment with German lesbian feet.

• 55:24Duncan Trussell?

  And all of a sudden-

• 55:25Kurt Metzger?

  What is different about the quality of those feet?

• 55:27Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 55:28Kurt Metzger?

  German lesbian feet? One, what, what difference if any does being German or being lesbian have to do?

• 55:33Duncan Trussell?

  It's a whole episode, dude.

• 55:35Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, alright.

• 55:36Duncan Trussell?

  But yeah, you just think about it. You don't write it down.

• 55:40Kurt Metzger?

  I'm not joking, that happened to my girl like a bunch of, and other people have said it to me.

• 55:44Duncan Trussell?

  That's what I'm saying. You can do the experiment yourself. Just, it has to be something you would normally never think about. And, yeah, German lesbians. It's-

• 55:52Kurt Metzger?

  Is that what they look like?

• 55:53Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 55:54Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, wait, so just-

• 55:55Duncan Trussell?

  These started showing up on my timeline.

• 55:57Kurt Metzger?

  How thin was, like the smart glass pad, how big or thin was it, would you say?

• 56:02Duncan Trussell?

  It was like a plexiglass. It looked like plexiglass. It's all it looked like, like a small rectangle.

• 56:06Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, you could just drop it wherever and not it was gonna happen?

• 56:09Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. They were tough. And I remember when you held them up at like an angle in the light, you could see like wiring in it, like, like, you know, hair thin wiring. Like at an angle.

• 56:19Kurt Metzger?

  Listen, anybody could feel free to, Tanner can find the comments that are probably gonna call me stupid, but like the, see, do you understand little things where I'm like, that sounds very believable to me and like a real thing?

• 56:30Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. I don't even want to waste time.

• 56:33Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, no, we don't qualify shit here. If I thought it's good as good. I'm just saying, I'm just saying like- So, okay, yeah, you gotta continue the story. I'm sorry, I'm fucking up you telling the story because like last time when you were talking about what Mike Pence, your exo that looks like Mike Pence told you. Certain details of it are like, wow, there's a propaganda they're letting this guy, they're saying to a guy they did weird shit to his head.

• 56:56Duncan Trussell?

  Here's the thing, I think we're burying the lead here, man.

• 56:58Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, sorry.

• 56:59Duncan Trussell?

  We have a dude who had sex on the moon.

• 57:00Kurt Metzger?

  I thought you got people pregnant, but they paid.

• 57:03Duncan Trussell?

  And you're talking about Mike fucking Pence. I want to hear what it's like to hump on the moon to make love on the moon.

• 57:06Kurt Metzger?

  Well, if you must know, I'm a virgin. Okay, look, I'm a virgin in front.

• 57:10Duncan Trussell?

  It's okay. I don't think anything's wrong with it. You're a virgin. I think it's great.

• 57:13Kurt Metzger?

  I was called a moon virgin, which means only in the front. Wait, hold, okay, I'm sorry.

• 57:20Kurt Metzger?

  But I, I was just thrown off by the thing about controlling your, when a woman's on her pyramid with the glass pad.

• 57:25Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 57:26Kurt Metzger?

  I thought that, Daryl, my, I might be misremembering, I thought it was like you, like they want you to knock up whores because they want the kids. But are you saying the, the brothel reward sex, they wouldn't get pregnant if they didn't want? Maybe I'm, I'm misunderstanding you.

• 57:40Speaker 07

  No, she was like a higher up, like she had like a higher up.

• 57:43Kurt Metzger?

  Because she's a nurse.

• 57:44Speaker 07

  Yeah, so she was a nurse and there were brothels there, yeah, and.

• 57:48Duncan Trussell?

  And there's called sex workers.

• 57:50Kurt Metzger?

  Pardon me, Duncan, I'm sorry. Duncan's mother passed away recently. Um, okay.

• 57:58Duncan Trussell?

  That's so fucked up, you monster.

• 58:02Kurt Metzger?

  I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything by it.

• 58:07Kurt Metzger?

  Oh my God. Okay, sorry. Wait.

• 58:12Kurt Metzger?

  It's just like a, it is like a terrible compulsion to throw that joke out. It was just there. You know how many jokes there, you cannot do it.

• 58:19Duncan Trussell?

  You had to do that.

• 58:21Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, you get what I'm saying, Buster, right? Okay, wait, wait, wait.

• 58:27Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, it is a bad joke. I felt bad while I did it.

• 58:29Duncan Trussell?

  You should feel bad for the rest of your life.

• 58:31Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, but I'm gonna distract from it now because, Daryl, remember, so is this the nurse that when you were first in the program, she's like, what's your name? And you didn't remember? Because they just did something to you and she goes, everybody knows their name. You know what I'm talking about?

• 58:43Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, she was giving me like a physical in the beginning. It was when I first got there. And she used a smart glass pad and I saw like, you know, a humanoid figure and she kind of just put her hand on it and pulled it out. And it became like a 3D image and she was able to spin it around and you saw like the circulatory system. She was able to, you know, zoom in on the heart and the brain and everything else. And then.

• 59:05Duncan Trussell?

  Was she cute, the nurse?

• 59:07Kurt Metzger?

  Well, he was, yeah, yeah. He was hooking up with her.

• 59:09Duncan Trussell?

  Did you feel a connection during the physical or how did you guys end up getting to know each other?

• 59:14Kurt Metzger?

  Were you, did you, had they fucked your brain at all yet at that point or no, not yet?

• 59:20Speaker 07

  No, I was brand new to it and I was almost like, it was like I had no, I could still reason. I still knew, you know, mathematics and English, but I, I knew nothing of my history. So I was almost like.

• 59:30Kurt Metzger?

  Why not? Is that because of a fifth density thing or a separate thing?

• 59:35Speaker 07

  I, I think it's because they actually take your memories away when they put you in the density chamber. It does more than just, you know, raise you up to a fifth density. It could take, uh, you know, um, what do they call them? Um.

• 59:47Duncan Trussell?

  It didn't.

• 59:48Speaker 07

  Connections out.

• 59:49Duncan Trussell?

  It's like you get some kind of amnesia or something.

• 59:52Kurt Metzger?

  It sounds, wait, wait, hold on. That's real. See how interesting this is?

• 59:55Duncan Trussell?

  That's fascinating.

• 59:56Kurt Metzger?

  Because you were saying that, so on the last episode, I'm sorry, we didn't catch everybody up on fifth density. Fifth density normally, if you've heard it out in the world, it's some, it sounds like new age horse shit. Where I've never, and people that are smart that I've asked, like, I'm not saying it's a real thing. I'm just asking you what it, what you think it means. And the only time I forgot to answer was Daryl on the show last time because that cone thing I'd never heard before.

• 1:00:19Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:20Kurt Metzger?

  And I kind of could get my head around it.

• 1:00:22Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:23Kurt Metzger?

  Um, but if you're meditating a lot, aren't you supposed to break free of attachments if you go to that on your own naturally?

• 1:00:29Duncan Trussell?

  What do you mean?

• 1:00:30Speaker 07

  Well, I mean, you know, I, I don't know. It depends on how, how the attachment is, how old it is, how much experience it has, how difficult it is to get rid of it. But I mean.

• 1:00:43Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, I'll tell you something from the wisdom of Kabbalah Duncan, and you know I'm always telling you about Kabbalah. I hate Kabbalah, but I think this is a true thing.

• 1:00:51Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 1:00:52Kurt Metzger?

  In a poetic sense, definitely. There's a whole thing about how you're not, um, there's like a, something about your serpent around your spine that tries to tell you.

• 1:01:00Duncan Trussell?

  Kundalini.

• 1:01:02Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, but as you age, there's this voice talking in your head, and it's a serpent trying to make you think you are the serpent. And then when you get older, it tries to make you think it's God. It's a thing written in there, and, and the thing he was talking about with Aquino, it sounds like the thing out of Kabbalah for real dude. And then, but, but the guy who I've been getting a costume of sent to me by, uh, by Danny Jones's guy. There's some very minimally watched Kabbalah channel that I watch all the time because I, it sometimes is super interesting. And he said, uh, yeah, you're not your soul, you're not your body, you're not your spirit. You're not all these, I can't remember how many things they said made up of soul. The thing that you are is choice.

• 1:01:43Kurt Metzger?

  Was when they go, oh, do you have free will? No, you literally are choice. Even if I limit your choices, that's still choice. The part that is you at the end of your life is all the choices you made. That's the you. So let's say I artificially, I think this fifth density you described there, uh, I'm, I'm more out there than your story, by the way. I think that these people are like undead at the end of the day, and I'll tell you why later.

• 1:02:05Duncan Trussell?

  You know the choice thing real quick, that is in the Bhagavad Gita, the verse is, you have a right to your action. You do not have a right to the fruits of your action. You should, it, all you are is your action.

• 1:02:17Kurt Metzger?

  They are, uh, that's why all like, uh, oligarchs love India because they, they love that kind of talk.

• 1:02:22Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, it's just what you just said though, right?

• 1:02:24Kurt Metzger?

  No, it's like, you're not entitled to fruits of your action. Maybe a Brahmin will take everything you've earned and you're in a lower caste. That's why British love it. That's why all, that's why his XO was saying, oh, the Anglo-Saxon, they love the caste system. They love it.

• 1:02:38Duncan Trussell?

  But you, but aside from that, it is kind of what you, it's what you're talking about. But all you are is your choice. It's the same thing.

• 1:02:44Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, yes, yes. Sorry. I, I, you're correct. Okay. Wait. So if you are choice, when you die, you're like a fucking. You're you're like a tree because in the it normally in in the fifth dimension you would be static Daryl last week and watch last week's misery boys because I can't catch up to everything. But remember what you were saying about density sickness and they told you not to pick a guy up? Because you're moving too fast.

• 1:03:08Duncan Trussell?

  Break his arm.

• 1:03:09Kurt Metzger?

  So you're higher on the cone. And and that's the higher density and so you're moving much faster than us where our shit's all spread out. At the lower part, I I it's just like I can understand the thing when he's telling, okay. So. I could see you getting artificially pushed into fifth density. And that's the same effect as breaking down your ego. Right? Am I wrong?

• 1:03:30Speaker 07

  I mean.

• 1:03:31Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:32Duncan Trussell?

  I don't know.

• 1:03:33Speaker 07

  It it it was definitely less ego. It's it's more of a collective, as I said.

• 1:03:39Kurt Metzger?

  Describe the mental thing of it because that's that was I didn't ask you do you have last time, but you said something about swimming in people's thoughts.

• 1:03:46Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, like i- if you're just with two or three different people, then you're more of an individual. But if you're with four or five different people, you yeah, you get to a point where if you're not, if it's never happened to you before, it's very confusing. And you're kind of like swimming in others thoughts and you don't know whose thoughts are yours or or not. And yeah, and you question it and it's it's very bizarre. And like I said, color spectrum goes up, your your sound frequency goes up.

• 1:04:09Duncan Trussell?

  So kind of group mind.

• 1:04:11Kurt Metzger?

  It sounds like you're at a rave, by the way.

• 1:04:13Duncan Trussell?

  I know, I was gonna say ketamine. It's like when you do ketamine with people.

• 1:04:16Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, well, because the thing is that the madness of crowds it's called. But the thing that I'm that I pick out of the story is like the those details are are like.

• 1:04:26Duncan Trussell?

  Well, you know.

• 1:04:26Kurt Metzger?

  If you were high on a dissociative, oh, uh, salvia, our friend Daryl Ari Shafir. Did salvia and his, I thought it was DMT, but it wasn't a salvia. And he lived 20 years married to some chick.

• 1:04:39Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:40Kurt Metzger?

  So, you know, when you talk about 20 and back, you could take salvia and possibly.

• 1:04:44Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:45Kurt Metzger?

  That might happen, or you might think you're a lamp for 20 years. There's ways to make you have a whole alternate life.

• 1:04:50Duncan Trussell?

  Sure.

• 1:04:50Kurt Metzger?

  That are on earth.

• 1:04:51Duncan Trussell?

  Sure, that's what this could be.

• 1:04:53Speaker 07

  Yeah, and talking about hallucinogens, I I you have to you have to understand, I joined the program. As soon as I got on base, like three weeks in, and so I still had another two years of living on the base after I got back. And I I used to drink on the bar on base and the Satanists were there. And this one guy I called the Goon, he was very big, he had a shaved head, I don't remember.

• 1:05:12Kurt Metzger?

  Did they say they're Satan, like why? How did you identify them as Satanists? Were they talking about it? Were they wear a special uniform?

• 1:05:18Speaker 07

  Well, I mean, one time I was in the locker room and the guys mentioned their names and they said, did you see them? And they were wearing black cloaks and, and you know, black hoods and in the underground, they're walking around the underground base with these black cloaks on.

• 1:05:32Kurt Metzger?

  Why?

• 1:05:33Speaker 07

  And Robert told me about it too, that they were Satanists.

• 1:05:35Duncan Trussell?

  Why do you think they wore those cloaks?

• 1:05:38Speaker 07

  Well, I mean, it was just like they would have ceremony. There was like this one really weird woman on base. You could tell she was like.

• 1:05:47Kurt Metzger?

  Cause she had neck tattoos, go on.

• 1:05:49Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 1:05:50Kurt Metzger?

  When a girl is, I know it's Florida, but when a girl has neck tattoos, I go, oh, she's been.

• 1:05:57Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah. And anyways, I, I asked Robert about her cause I was suspicious.

• 1:06:02Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, right. What else is weird about her though? Well, like what?

• 1:06:06Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 1:06:06Kurt Metzger?

  In her appearance, I, I'm only, cause I love you, the fucking whole story, but, but what, what was it? I know when people have a vibe like that, cause uh, me and Tanner had an encounter with a guy dressed like a, in devil makeup with a nice cowboy suit, sitting in the front row to roast battle, like a vampire draining the energy. And this maniac Tanner went up to him and gave him a Masonic handshake. And the guy goes, you've got great energy. This is an energy vampire, as long as I'm sure. Uh, what was so off about her to you that was uncanny, I guess?

• 1:06:36Speaker 07

  Yeah, we were coming back from the bar one night, like it was closed and the goon was walking behind me and she was walking behind me. And it was like springtime in Britain and there were snails all over the sidewalk. And I stepped on a snail and she started screaming, you killed a snail.

• 1:06:50Kurt Metzger?

  That is crazy as fuck, actually.

• 1:06:52Duncan Trussell?

  Fucking annoying.

• 1:06:53Kurt Metzger?

  That's a, you know what? I would bring that up to my commanding officer as well. If some bitch went nutty on me because I stepped on a fucking snail.

• 1:06:59Duncan Trussell?

  Dude, I'd rather be with a reptilian.

• 1:07:02Kurt Metzger?

  The reptilian was a good guy that he poked in the eye compared to this.

• 1:07:06Duncan Trussell?

  So annoying.

• 1:07:07Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, guys, sorry.

• 1:07:08Speaker 07

  But Robert, I asked Robert about it and he said that the reptiles see us as lower than snails, like snails are more.

• 1:07:16Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, was she a reptile? Really?

• 1:07:19Speaker 07

  Yeah, like they see it like snails as a higher life form than us.

• 1:07:23Kurt Metzger?

  By the way, assholes, why are you dicking around with us then?

• 1:07:25Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, go fuck with the snails lizard people.

• 1:07:28Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, I've heard of some racism in my lifetime, but this is really.

• 1:07:31Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:32Kurt Metzger?

  This is beyond Indian gas system, frankly. This is beyond Gaza.

• 1:07:37Duncan Trussell?

  The dumbest thing I've ever heard.

• 1:07:39Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, I was in the bar with the goon and he just said to me, have you ever done acid? And I was in the military. So I said like, I've done mushrooms before. Yeah.

• 1:07:47Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, why? Why do you say mushrooms? Is that okay? Not acid?

• 1:07:51Speaker 07

  Oh, I mean, I just seem more okay.

• 1:07:53Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, I okay.

• 1:07:55Duncan Trussell?

  So the goon says you ever done acid?

• 1:07:56Kurt Metzger?

  Are you freaked out that there's a term called gooning now? Because I know like goon used to mean a guy that is like a big Satanist. But now they called a goon cave, but like kinda you were there at a goon cave.

• 1:08:08Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, exactly. And, and he said, you know, the, the waves you feel, you can't tell if they're coming from space or you can't tell if they're, if they're coming from earth.

• 1:08:16Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 1:08:16Speaker 07

  And I said, yeah, I used to call those echoes. And he goes, he goes, echo, that's a good word for it. He goes, well, they live between the echoes. He said, you could see a quino and he didn't like that. And he told me that.

• 1:08:28Kurt Metzger?

  What do you mean you could see him? Explain that.

• 1:08:31Speaker 07

  Well, I mean, he did this, he kind of, he was in front of me and then he, he appeared back in the, of the room. And this is the reptile that possessed them, not a quino. Yeah. But yeah, he was like in front of me and then he just appeared in the back of the room. And I looked over and you know, he was looking at me and then he just appeared right in front of me. And then I just looked at him in front of me and that's how they can, like I said, they, they can jump through portals. You know what I mean?

• 1:08:57Kurt Metzger?

  But wait, was a quino's reptile form, I, I kinda, I heard you telling us of, but the thing you just said about between echoes, I, I never heard anything like that, have you?

• 1:09:06Duncan Trussell?

  You don't know about between the echoes?

• 1:09:07Kurt Metzger?

  No. Should I?

• 1:09:09Duncan Trussell?

  Have you taken, you've taken LSD?

• 1:09:11Kurt Metzger?

  No, no, I'm just saying, is that a saying that's as outside? Cause I've never heard that phrase before. I'm telling you the truth.

• 1:09:15Speaker 07

  We just said it when we were kids. We, we used to call them, you feel that? Yeah, it's the echoes. Like we used to say it in, in high school.

• 1:09:21Duncan Trussell?

  I'm loving you, man. I know you and me, you and me. This guy doesn't know about the echoes.

• 1:09:28Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, Duncan hangs out with gnomes and I'm not downing him. People hang out with who they want to hang out with.

• 1:09:32Duncan Trussell?

  I didn't hang out with a gnome.

• 1:09:34Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, last episode when Dale said something about gnomes, we have, we'll get to it, but you reacted as if you had a bad experience with a gnome.

• 1:09:41Duncan Trussell?

  I had a horrible experience with a gnome. I don't want to waste Daryl's time.

• 1:09:46Kurt Metzger?

  You told the doctor you fell, didn't you?

• 1:09:47Duncan Trussell?

  Listen, I'm not gonna burn up somebody who's been on the moon.

• 1:09:51Kurt Metzger?

  No, no, you're right.

• 1:09:52Duncan Trussell?

  Laying pipes with my gnome story.

• 1:09:55Kurt Metzger?

  I'm sorry, I am, yo, so we're gonna get comments and Tanner's gonna read them and they're gonna be right. So I apologize. Wait, okay, so hold on. The between the echoes thing, because frequency and terror hertz is a big part of this. And my boy Gray that gave me that parasite information was telling me that water, I don't remember what, terror hertz? But it starts to exhibit extradimensional qualities? These fucking weirdos? And so, you know, all this stuff, some kind of infrasound. You know, the Oz effect, right? When people see a UFO or a Bigfoot and everything's quiet?

• 1:10:26Duncan Trussell?

  No, he's talking about time pulses, basically.

• 1:10:28Kurt Metzger?

  But it's all frequencies, right? Am I wrong? I'm sorry, go ahead, Daryl.

• 1:10:33Speaker 07

  Well, I mean, I would say you're right. Yeah, I mean, and the whole thing with the, what makes me, what you just said with the UFOs with the, was the Miami mall where they just started seeing like?

• 1:10:43Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 1:10:43Speaker 07

  Yeah, they saw shadow beings like coming out of portals and?

• 1:10:46Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:10:47Speaker 07

  You know, are just disappearing? I think that that, the mall, like went, that part of Earth went up in the fourth density and we got to see what was already around us constantly that we just don't notice.

• 1:10:58Duncan Trussell?

  That's it.

• 1:10:59Kurt Metzger?

  So is that, okay, and like, what is that, some cosmic thing? Like, why would Earth, why would one part of Earth go into that? Higher up in that cone and one part not? Is that? I know you said it's not shaped like a cone for real, but that's how to think about it. Cause I was listening to the episode. What is some spot? I guess if a portal's popping up, that's exactly what it is in, right?

• 1:11:19Speaker 07

  Yeah, I would say just Earth kind of shifted into a higher density, that part of Earth anyways. That, that's, that's what I believe it was. And the fourth density is like the astral plane, the spirit world. It's like the lower fourth is where the reptiles live.

• 1:11:33Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, dude, Daryl. Now Duncan, do you remember what you said to me about when you played Stanton Leve's wedding?

• 1:11:39Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 1:11:39Kurt Metzger?

  And I actually was like, you said it felt like really dense?

• 1:11:42Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. Yeah, it was heavy, man.

• 1:11:46Kurt Metzger?

  But lower fourth astral is a, is the density above third, right?

• 1:11:50Duncan Trussell?

  It's just a, it's like, you know, it, it's a very specific feeling. It's, it's actually weirdly similar to when you go into a haunted house or something. There's a extra density in there. It sucks.

• 1:12:02Kurt Metzger?

  So.

• 1:12:02Duncan Trussell?

  The wedding was fun, but.

• 1:12:03Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, me and Duncan were in that gay program. I don't remember anything about it, to be honest with you, other than a pink drink. It may have been good or bad. Maybe it was boring. I don't know. With Duncan, I asked a bunch of people at this, Daryl, and like, a bunch of people have very strange memories that I know personally. And no two, like, only a couple are the same. Everybody, well, I guess because they do private. You know, it's a private contractor thing, I imagine.

• 1:12:28Duncan Trussell?

  Well.

• 1:12:28Kurt Metzger?

  But some of them are so insane. And because of that, well, I only learned about that because of hearing Daryl's story in the beginning.

• 1:12:35Duncan Trussell?

  We can find the whole list. There's a whole list of people who are in the gay program, like, that's what most of us have.

• 1:12:41Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 1:12:41Duncan Trussell?

  The occipital bulb. You have an occipital bulb? Got a little bump back there?

• 1:12:45Kurt Metzger?

  I'm saving up, guys. Hey, wait, okay, so the, the weird lady that was mad about a snail, was she not, so she was not a human, she was a reptilian, or what was her deal?

• 1:12:55Speaker 07

  No, Robert told me she, she was used for sex magic. And she wasn't actually in the twenty year and back program. She wasn't going to be age regressed or anything like that. She was this part of like a satanic family and was used for sex magic. And I said, with the Satanists? And he said, and more? And I said, with the, with the reptiles? And he said, and more? And I said, the elongated skulls? Because those are the ones I remember that I saw.

• 1:13:19Kurt Metzger?

  What do you mean elongated skulls? I'm sorry. Would you say that about elongated skulls? What do you mean by that?

• 1:13:23Speaker 07

  Well, the, I was playing a keynote, I told the keynote that I played classical guitar, and that was one of the things I did in the program. And he had his goongo and grab a guitar for me. And I was sitting down naked on a chair with his guitar in my lap.

• 1:13:38Kurt Metzger?

  You had to be naked for it? Why?

• 1:13:41Speaker 07

  Well, I was being tortured. I was on a rack. It was, they let me off the rack.

• 1:13:45Kurt Metzger?

  I thought.

• 1:13:45Duncan Trussell?

  To play classical guitar naked?

• 1:13:47Kurt Metzger?

  They made you do like Jenny from Forrest Gump and be naked playing guitar and change your.

• 1:13:51Duncan Trussell?

  That is so diminished.

• 1:13:54Speaker 07

  And when I was planning, and I've heard this about them, they love our classical music. Their average IQ is 160, so like a really intelligent, probably like through over 300.

• 1:14:06Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 1:14:06Speaker 07

  And they like our classical music, but they're actually considered cannibals because they can have children with us, but the child is sterile, like a mule, like when you breed a horse and a donkey.

• 1:14:18Kurt Metzger?

  Daryl, holy shit dude. Okay, so Gary Wayne, I recommend Gary Wayne to everybody and he's a Christian guy that's into the Bible, but what, but he, I've never seen anybody do research he does. And I've never seen anybody where they studied every goddamn religion and figured out the commonalities, but the Rothium after the flood in the Bible.

• 1:14:38Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:38Kurt Metzger?

  So those are smaller giants. Um, Gary Wayne's like, yeah, they had some kind of fertility problem. And Daryl, you said the Taijitans, you said it was called stagnant DNA. There's a theme that you're going to hear repeat throughout this of a fertility problem, where you gotta come in, now if you're really a superior being and you can mate with us, that's akin and they live long, right? So that is both bestiality and petillia what they're doing.

• 1:15:05Duncan Trussell?

  Daryl, Daryl, I want to.

• 1:15:07Kurt Metzger?

  If I'm a snail, if I'm a snail, you fuck me, you're a pervert.

• 1:15:11Duncan Trussell?

  Daryl, real quick, what, what song were you playing?

• 1:15:16Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, good question.

• 1:15:17Speaker 07

  Something Bach, something.

• 1:15:19Duncan Trussell?

  Do you remember?

• 1:15:20Speaker 07

  Something, I don't remember the exact song, but I remember a keynote, the reptile went back into his body and he started playing classical flute. I didn't know he played flute.

• 1:15:30Kurt Metzger?

  If you know what I mean, I'm joking.

• 1:15:31Duncan Trussell?

  So you're, you're sitting, you've been tortured, now you're naked, playing classical guitar with a lizard playing the flute.

• 1:15:39Kurt Metzger?

  Like Lizzo playing the crystal flute of John.

• 1:15:42Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, but he went to his human body to do it and all of a sudden, yeah, like, like this.

• 1:15:47Duncan Trussell?

  That is wild, man.

• 1:15:50Speaker 07

  It was wearing a red robe and I thought it had a red turban on, but I think it wrapped its red hair really tightly around its cone.

• 1:15:57Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 1:15:57Speaker 07

  And it had, it sunk, uh, its eyes, like the flesh sunk in, so it looked like the, kinda like their eyes. Cause if you see their eye sockets, they're huge. And if you see their jaws, their molars are bigger than ours. They have them in South America and they're not a joke and they have, always have red hair.

• 1:16:12Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, who has red hair? Lizards?

• 1:16:15Speaker 07

  No, no.

• 1:16:15Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, long head skulls. Okay, okay, I'm sorry.

• 1:16:18Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:16:19Kurt Metzger?

  I was getting freaked out, dude.

• 1:16:21Speaker 07

  It, it did this weird thing where it kinda lifted its head up and it was rocking its head back and forth. Like it really enjoyed it as I was playing and like it was like kinda clenching its jaw and rocking its head back and forth.

• 1:16:31Duncan Trussell?

  Did that feel, did, did that feel good to you? Did, did you think like, you know, at least something's going my way tonight?

• 1:16:36Speaker 07

  Well, I mean, it was just relief from the torture, you know what I mean? It was something to get out of it for ten minutes.

• 1:16:42Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, so Daryl, cause I remember you telling, telling a story about, I know about those long head redheads, but I remember you telling a story about playing.

• 1:16:50Duncan Trussell?

  Right there, look on the screen. He pulled it up. Pull it up again, that's crazy.

• 1:16:53Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, you're talking to Tanner. But I remember you saying you, you played for lizards, not Akino. I didn't know that while you were being tortured, they made you play naked. But the thing where you, you said they had like these kinda glowy symbols on their robes. They look like the Skeksis from Dark Crystal. And you said you played for them. Well, you weren't naked for that other time you played, were you?

• 1:17:11Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, listen. What is that interference? You guys hearing that?

• 1:17:14Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, I did hear it.

• 1:17:15Duncan Trussell?

  What was that?

• 1:17:15Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I don't know. What was it?

• 1:17:17Duncan Trussell?

  Was that on yours? Did you hear that, Daryl?

• 1:17:20Speaker 07

  I didn't hear anything.

• 1:17:21Kurt Metzger?

  I heard like interference just now.

• 1:17:23Duncan Trussell?

  The fuck was that?

• 1:17:24Speaker 06

  That was from his phone.

• 1:17:25Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, okay, alright. Well, I'm getting spooked out cause of all this lizard talk. Okay, wait, wait, wait.

• 1:17:30Speaker 06

  No, I'm saying it was in the call.

• 1:17:32Duncan Trussell?

  What the fuck was that?

• 1:17:33Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, well, I mean, dude, I mean, look, when I busted out that parasite thing on that one episode.

• 1:17:37Duncan Trussell?

  Sounded like people talking.

• 1:17:39Kurt Metzger?

  Gray was like, dude, just check with me before you do that next time.

• 1:17:41Duncan Trussell?

  You didn't hear that, Daryl?

• 1:17:42Kurt Metzger?

  Yes, I heard it.

• 1:17:43Duncan Trussell?

  No.

• 1:17:43Speaker 07

  I didn't hear it on my end, no.

• 1:17:44Kurt Metzger?

  No, we heard it, yeah. But, uh, look, I don't give a shit about that. Okay, wait, wait. It's, uh, that's not a mystery I wanna give this all. Okay, wait.

• 1:17:51Speaker 07

  Let him listen.

• 1:17:53Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, let him. Uh, dude, that's, like, you, you know, I think of it playing naked guitar for a goddamn lizard on flute. Look at my-

• 1:18:02Duncan Trussell?

  Everything but the torture sounds awesome.

• 1:18:04Kurt Metzger?

  Listen, listen lizard, don't, you could see this, I got a big old Italian retard dick. I know you know what that is, lizard. You can look at it while I play guitar. I don't give a shit.

• 1:18:14Duncan Trussell?

  Well, I had it with the guitar in my lap, so I had some decency. You were covering yourself.

• 1:18:18Kurt Metzger?

  I would have played the guitar with my dick, but I'm, I have a, a problem with authority. Okay, wait, wait. So, so you're being tortured and then he's like, now you're gonna play guitar. So, okay, look, just off that story. And by the way, the pincher ones, the real whatever lizard is it, the other guy talks about that Daryl also has a thing about. Oh, the guy, uh, Donald something that I first heard of those from, he goes.

• 1:18:42Duncan Trussell?

  Donald Marshall, yeah.

• 1:18:43Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, he said they think that like violence and pain is like music to them.

• 1:18:47Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, God.

• 1:18:48Kurt Metzger?

  But if you think about it, it's all in the same theme of terror of like waves of sound. It terror hurts. And this kept, you know, you, you seen those cinematic, uh, patterns where they use sound waves to make the sand move? If you think about matter, it's, it's, it's analogous to that, right? Am I wrong?

• 1:19:04Duncan Trussell?

  When I had my lizard dream, my reptilian dream, they, you know, if you ever seen like kids fuck around with ants nests or something. It was like that level of like, you know, they just, they thought it was funny. They thought like, and they also, you know, in that dream that somehow I knew that they liked watching us fuck, which was.

• 1:19:25Kurt Metzger?

  No, they're way into it. By the way, have you ever, do you know a Partho, Parthogenesis, or Parthenogenesis? Have you ever heard of that, Daryl? Parthenogenesis?

• 1:19:33Duncan Trussell?

  No.

• 1:19:34Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so that, uh, Komodo dragon, you've heard of the Komodo dragon?

• 1:19:38Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, I've heard of the Komodo dragon.

• 1:19:39Kurt Metzger?

  The Komodo dragon is actually a dwarf. Did you know that? It's an, it has like little tiny elephants, the Komodo dragon.

• 1:19:45Duncan Trussell?

  Whoa, no way.

• 1:19:47Kurt Metzger?

  That's kind of big, is actually a dwarven version of that.

• 1:19:49Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 1:19:50Kurt Metzger?

  Not only that, the Komodo dragon, not all of them, but certain bloodlines of Komodo dragon are capable of something called Parthenogenesis, which is virgin birth.

• 1:20:01Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, wow. I didn't hear that, yeah. I never knew that.

• 1:20:03Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, I said to Rogan, he was like, all right, he had heard, he always knows Komodo knowledge if I say it to him. So, oh, and this guy, the lizard, not this guy, there's a guy who does, uh, rep, I can't remember his name, but he has a reptile channel. I, I got it off his channel. It's a really great channel. He's this weird guy that loves lizards. I mean, probably he's like snails too, I bet. Anyway, uh, the fucking, uh, when I heard that, I was like, that is a, certain snakes can do it? If there's no males around, suitable, but not all of the snakes, but if you have the right blood type of snake, you can make a one perfect male specimen with no males around.

• 1:20:38Duncan Trussell?

  Wow.

• 1:20:38Kurt Metzger?

  A perfect one genetically.

• 1:20:40Duncan Trussell?

  That's incredible.

• 1:20:41Kurt Metzger?

  Now, Daryl has a thing about the Taijitans we get to later, but I just want to bring it up now, keeping your head, Duncan.

• 1:20:46Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 1:20:47Kurt Metzger?

  Did you say the women, so I guess they live like a certain hundreds of years, and if the guy dies, they can clone him and his wife is impregnated and gives birth to him, and he'll be alive again. They're like, they live 800 years, so it's not a big deal.

• 1:21:01Duncan Trussell?

  Are you fucking kidding me?

• 1:21:03Kurt Metzger?

  Am I, am I close to what you said, Daryl?

• 1:21:05Speaker 07

  Well, they can do that, but they can, they can also, like, um,

• 1:21:09Duncan Trussell?

  Oh my god, that sucks.

• 1:21:10Speaker 07

  They can actually, like, keep a soul and then become pregnant, and if they have, like, a loved one or something that wanted to be reborn in this woman, then they can actually put the soul in that body and it works.

• 1:21:21Duncan Trussell?

  Do you have to want to be reborn, or can they do it without consent?

• 1:21:24Kurt Metzger?

  Do you hear what he's saying, by the way?

• 1:21:26Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:26Kurt Metzger?

  He's talking about necromancy.

• 1:21:28Duncan Trussell?

  It's, I'm, he's talking about what could be a nightmare.

• 1:21:30Kurt Metzger?

  The reason I think all these beings, let's just, okay, let's just have fun and assume that he went to all these places, they weren't doing a mind control VR thing on him, this is in the, in the universe, okay? That detail is, is, it crosses over with so much occultism, and if you look in Nathaniel Gillis, who my fans call Smart Shane, he, he has a book called Necronetics, because he was the first guy to say, I think this is a race of necromancers. That's what necromancy is, and by the way, so, and I told you my theory about the actual Jesus was that they're trying to do one of these moon children where they put a consciousness in a body, and it backfired on them, and they brought something that was against them, and they don't want you to know about it.

• 1:22:13Kurt Metzger?

  That's my little theory, I don't know if people like it or not, but I don't care, I'm just telling you. So, what he just said, the woman can, you can hold a consciousness like a voodoo priest in a goddamn jug or battery, doesn't really matter, the superficial thing.

• 1:22:25Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:22:26Kurt Metzger?

  And impregnate it into another woman. In ancient times, what Nathaniel Gillis talks about it, they would find metal, a necromancer could imprint, he put a sigil on a piece of metal and put it in a woman to put a consciousness in a baby and then take the baby.

• 1:22:41Duncan Trussell?

  Oh my god, I'm gonna tell you something crazy, I don't think we've talked about it yet. I was at Burning Man, talking to...

• 1:22:49Duncan Trussell?

  Somebody about ayahuasca, she goes to a shaman. The shaman could tell her-

• 1:22:54Kurt Metzger?

  You didn't put the guy out?

• 1:22:55Duncan Trussell?

  The shaman could tell her every shaman that she'd gone to before because they leave signatures in your energy body.

• 1:23:06Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, well, sometimes implants as well. But dude, that's why your story blew my mind because I just heard another story where I could pick out these same things. Now, if you think, this, I say this to Catholics, is anybody Catholic here?

• 1:23:19Kurt Metzger?

  I says to James McCann, an adult convert, a good comic, you know James McCann?

• 1:23:23Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, of course.

• 1:23:24Kurt Metzger?

  There's two people, okay, one, Jay Dyer, who's Eastern Orthodox, and Jay Dyer is a fucking smart guy. And I go, so you're telling, because I didn't grow up with the Trinity, because I don't understand why Jesus, if he's God himself, why is he going, "Why me? Why did you forsake me?" Or, "I and me are one." It doesn't make sense to me, and I just want you to answer how that's possible. So I would go to Jay Dyer, I'm like, and it's because of Daryl's story. I go, "So you're telling me that God got his mother pregnant with himself?"

• 1:23:58Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, there's a term for it.

• 1:24:00Kurt Metzger?

  So, here's what Jay Dyer say, he goes, "Well, the flesh and the..." He didn't have a good answer. When I said it to James McCann, this is why I love James McCann, the adult convert to Catholicism from like Episcopalian, he goes, "Yes." He just said yes without thinking.

• 1:24:17Duncan Trussell?

  That's cool.

• 1:24:17Kurt Metzger?

  Now, that's Catholic, that guy gets it.

• 1:24:20Duncan Trussell?

  The term, there's a term. A sinca sinca-

• 1:24:23Speaker 07

  Am I getting my conception?

• 1:24:25Duncan Trussell?

  A sinca sinca-

• 1:24:25Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, parthenogenesis.

• 1:24:26Duncan Trussell?

  A sinca sinca beta tatva, it means simultaneous oneness and difference, so-

• 1:24:31Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, you hear that, Buster, you bitch?

• 1:24:35Duncan Trussell?

  Don't be mean to him now. He's, he's fine.

• 1:24:38Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, he's in a better place now, this globe with a coonskin cap on top of it.

• 1:24:43Duncan Trussell?

  He's fifth density now.

• 1:24:46Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, okay, so, okay, I'm sorry, I keep detouring from your story, but dude, I'm way into your story. And like, you know, you can just be lying about the whole thing, cuz I mean, your IQ is pretty high.

• 1:24:56Duncan Trussell?

  Why do you keep saying that?

• 1:24:57Kurt Metzger?

  Because I want people to get this. I don't believe shit, I wanna hear, I wanna not be bored. See, when I get bored of your story, I start thinking you're lying to me. So, here's my deal. You, I don't give a shit, as long as you tell me a thing that is like, oh, I haven't heard that before, and then, Daryl's story has things that I could correlate to a lot of other things that I wouldn't have thought I could. It was actually invaluable for my entire pattern of thinking, and I want this dummy we stuffed in a globe.

• 1:25:26Duncan Trussell?

  Just be nice to him now.

• 1:25:28Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so, alright, so, they could, how, did you know somebody that did that at any point? With a, implant their husband in their own womb?

• 1:25:37Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, it was a mother, her, that was like her rank, her name was Shara Yi. And it was mother, and it was her actual husband that died on the ship, we were attacked on the ship.

• 1:25:47Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, wait, I didn't see He-Man yet, don't spoil it, no, I'm joking. Dude, I never heard you say the name.

• 1:25:52Duncan Trussell?

  Let him tell the story! This is incredible, he's gonna get attacked on a ship, he, go ahead, just, please. This is an amazing story.

• 1:26:03Speaker 07

  Yeah, she asked me to be the father, and it was her husband, and I agreed to it, and so she gave birth to who was her husband.

• 1:26:09Kurt Metzger?

  How are you the father if he, wait, so, okay, wait, so, you got her pregnant, and they put his consciousness in the baby, is what you're saying?

• 1:26:16Speaker 07

  And, and the fetus, yes, they put the consciousness in the fetus.

• 1:26:20Kurt Metzger?

  Well, fetus just means baby, by the way.

• 1:26:21Duncan Trussell?

  I think that was a very

• 1:26:22Kurt Metzger?

  Say the name again?

• 1:26:23Duncan Trussell?

  Heroic thing you did.

• 1:26:25Kurt Metzger?

  Say her name?

• 1:26:27Speaker 07

  A Shara Yi, and I even said to Robert, I said, you mean like She-Ra, and he said, yes, and that's how I remember names, through words association.

• 1:26:34Kurt Metzger?

  Dude, that's Kabbalah shit, Shara He, Hebrew Spanish origin, it means my princess. Hebrew Spanish is specifically important, actually. Well, by the way, good work Tanner, bringing that up.

• 1:26:43Duncan Trussell?

  That was good, Tanner.

• 1:26:44Kurt Metzger?

  Good work.

• 1:26:45Duncan Trussell?

  So, wait, Daryl, so

• 1:26:46Kurt Metzger?

  Dude, that's crazy!

• 1:26:47Duncan Trussell?

  How did they talk to you about this, like, how did they bring this up, like, we want you, you're gonna get her pregnant, but it's not gonna technically be yours, or is it yours?

• 1:26:57Speaker 07

  No, no, she came up to me personally, and I cared about her, and she asked me to agree to this, and I just said, yes, and it was

• 1:27:04Duncan Trussell?

  And you had already been intimate with her?

• 1:27:06Speaker 07

  My DNA and her DNA, but his soul.

• 1:27:07Duncan Trussell?

  So, is that technically, that's still technically your kid? Like, you're gonna pay child support?

• 1:27:13Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, I got a lot coming, I think.

• 1:27:15Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, see, this is crazy that that name is a Kabbalah name, dude. Hebrew Spanish origin, let me translate what that means. That's Kabbalah shit. And Necronetics, the thing Nathaniel Gillis works on, specifically has to do with that.

• 1:27:28Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:30Kurt Metzger?

  I, I, I can't believe how great your story is, dude, of the things that I found out just by being like, what the fuck is this?

• 1:27:35Duncan Trussell?

  Do you talk to this nurse anymore?

• 1:27:38Speaker 07

  No, no, but she was like on the base. She was somebody I work with.

• 1:27:42Duncan Trussell?

  But you have a child out there and on the moon.

• 1:27:45Kurt Metzger?

  There is a lot.

• 1:27:45Duncan Trussell?

  You have a, you have a kid on the moon.

• 1:27:47Kurt Metzger?

  You know what, okay, is this all my fault? But, because I'm getting into later, not on the moon. But when you're on the moon, uh, and that nurse, that's why she's not getting pregnant. But, but the thing is specifically, you're being punished. It's a military prison, they want you to fuck hookers in the brothels. They're rewarding you with sex.

• 1:28:04Duncan Trussell?

  Sex work.

• 1:28:04Kurt Metzger?

  And then they're taking kids, is that, how, am I roughly getting it right?

• 1:28:09Speaker 07

  Yeah, it, it, they use sex to give you extra motivation to work. It also, if their IQ scores aren't high enough, they either get put into the programs if it's high enough. And you have to have a hundred and ten just to deal with the density change.

• 1:28:21Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:21Speaker 07

  So even to be like a laborer on the moon or like in the brothel or whatever, you have to have a, uh, yeah, you have to have at least a hundred and ten to like adjust to the density change. And, yeah, it was, it was motivation to work and Robert told me they took the kids that weren't, didn't have high enough IQs and they put them through the portal, which is just a looking glass, a portal into, uh,

• 1:28:42Kurt Metzger?

  What is a looking glass?

• 1:28:44Speaker 07

  I'm sorry?

• 1:28:45Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, what is a looking glass? So just to, to make it clear.

• 1:28:47Speaker 07

  Looking glass is like a way you can, it's a portal, but it's also a way to go anywhere in time and you can observe. Or you could step through and you'll be in that di- time period. So the past or the future. And yeah, they, they take the kids and they, they put them through this portal. And if, they use them for, you know, I don't know if I'm allowed to say it on your show, am I?

• 1:29:06Duncan Trussell?

  It depends on what it is.

• 1:29:07Kurt Metzger?

  Buster, how do you feel? Wait, that was actually.

• 1:29:10Speaker 07

  Well, I mean, the drug you get from kids that was on Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.

• 1:29:14Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, don't say it.

• 1:29:15Speaker 07

  They use them for.

• 1:29:16Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, yeah, no, don't say it. By the way, Hunter S. Thompson, I always bring it up when I was crushing Duncan's heart about, because Hunter S. Thompson's a piece of shit. And I proved it to him with one video that had nothing to do with this, but you could tell that guy made snuff films in his life. And I'd never heard of Adrenochrome. I didn't hear about it from Aldous Huxley, which would have been if I were smarter. I heard about it from the movie, not the book, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. And I remember when it came out, that movie, we wanted to find it and do it. Because it sounded like another kind of like acid or mushrooms.

• 1:29:46Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:46Kurt Metzger?

  I thought DMT was kind of what that was. No, when I looked up what it was, and by the way, what they, I think of Salvia, where you could become a lamp. The doctor that really shot himself up with that in Canada.

• 1:29:58Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:58Kurt Metzger?

  It made, it was so, imagine taking acid, but instead of feeling like you were all one, you're like, look at that beautiful lamp. And you don't relate to your sister no more. That's what he wrote in his journal.

• 1:30:09Duncan Trussell?

  You know, it's weird. If you leave an EpiPen in the car, it turns into Adrenochrome. Can you look that up?

• 1:30:14Kurt Metzger?

  No, we did it on an episode.

• 1:30:16Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, we already did?

• 1:30:17Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, wait, so.

• 1:30:18Speaker 07

  Well, it is like an adrenaline based drug, yeah.

• 1:30:20Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, it turns into Adrenochrome.

• 1:30:21Kurt Metzger?

  You ever almost, well, I know, I know Daryl did, but did you ever almost die and then not die?

• 1:30:26Duncan Trussell?

  I don't, I'm sure.

• 1:30:27Kurt Metzger?

  I almost got my head chopped off in a goddamn car accident. At the last minute, we swerved the other way, but we were going under a semi trailer. And I, I mean, dude, I was, it was, I was with Barry Crimmens, this other dude who was a dipshit that was driving. And I'll never forget that being that close to it, and it didn't slow down, but I just remember every part of it, you know what I mean?

• 1:30:48Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:49Kurt Metzger?

  And I remember my final, I thought, well, I guess I get to meet Jesus. That's the la, well, first I said, what the fuck, three times as we were going under it. And I go, well, I guess I get to meet Jesus. I remember that was like my last thought.

• 1:30:59Duncan Trussell?

  Good last thought.

• 1:31:00Kurt Metzger?

  And at the last minute, we just swerved the other way and the backseat where no one was, that went under instead. So we got drug up the highway. We were going the speed limit, but it was on black ice in Pennsylvania. So guess what? It's like a jet engine getting sucked in the semi, this dickhead driver. We get dragged up by the truck. I mean, I was like, oh, I'm dying. I just remember that. And then next minute, it drug us up, then would spit us out in the median. And me and Barry started fucking laughing. Dude, I have never felt so high in my whole life.

• 1:31:32Kurt Metzger?

  And we were just like, I mean, it was like we went to like a foxhole together. The driver, the dipshit whose fault it was, was weeping. He was not enjoying his adrenaline. He wasn't enjoying his adrenochrome made from his body. It was making him weep because he had committed some fraud on the insurance. But I just remember that so vividly where, and it felt like I had a vacation for three weeks after that. Now, the injuries to my back actually suck, but I remember the feeling was like, oh, I should do this like once a year as a vacation.

• 1:31:58Duncan Trussell?

  This is why people wingsuit fly. This is why people do extreme sports.

• 1:32:02Kurt Metzger?

  So your body makes it automatically. So you're on the moon. The thing I originally asked, and we went off topic for about an hour because of me, was you had this story where the chick, you got pushed in fifth density, it affected your recall of, I guess, your ego, very Buddhist. Probably what they do, the new Dalai Lama. And you had, it was like, I remember hearing, I was like, this is the coolest thing, like, if you made a movie, you would have this like, she asked you your name, right?

• 1:32:28Speaker 07

  Yeah, she, she said, what's your name? And I said, I don't remember. And she said, come on, think. Everybody remembers their name. And I thought about it and I said, Daryl. Yeah. And that, that was as simple as that.

• 1:32:38Kurt Metzger?

  It's like Kutta was breaking rocks on the moon.

• 1:32:40Duncan Trussell?

  Do you remember her name?

• 1:32:42Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 1:32:42Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, what's the nurse's name?

• 1:32:44Duncan Trussell?

  Can you say?

• 1:32:45Speaker 07

  Oh, April.

• 1:32:46Duncan Trussell?

  April.

• 1:32:47Kurt Metzger?

  April Macy, do you know her? She's like, I'm not joking. Okay, wait, so, like, do you remember, so, and you don't remember all of this linearly, right? What does it come into you in chunks? Cause how's it work?

• 1:33:00Speaker 07

  Yeah, I mean, that's exactly it. And, and like I said, if, if, if he hadn't told me that, my ex O, I wouldn't remember it, but it just, one memory triggered after another, and then it just all came to me. And it was just something, I remember like being in the lunchroom, after he told me all this and looking at the guys and thinking like, Michael Jackson's gonna die in a couple of years. And I was the king of some world and, I was just running through my head because he accidentally told me that, he said, the reason Michael Jackson died. And I said, wait a minute, Michael Jackson's dead? And he's like, oh yeah, he dies in a couple of years.

• 1:33:28Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, this is 2004?

• 1:33:30Speaker 07

  Yeah, 2004.

• 1:33:31Duncan Trussell?

  Cause he time travels so much.

• 1:33:34Speaker 07

  Yeah, he got confused. He actually had to be debriefed, he said, when he came back.

• 1:33:38Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, who had to be debriefed?

• 1:33:41Speaker 07

  Uh, Robert, my XO.

• 1:33:42Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, oh, because of the detail. Okay, right, I see.

• 1:33:45Duncan Trussell?

  So, Michael Jackson was a time traveler.

• 1:33:48Kurt Metzger?

  No, he's not saying that.

• 1:33:49Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, that is what he said. You just said Michael Jackson was a-

• 1:33:52Kurt Metzger?

  No, Robert, his XO.

• 1:33:54Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, I'm so sorry. Wait.

• 1:33:55Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:33:56Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, okay, I got you. I'm so sorry. I misunderstood.

• 1:33:58Kurt Metzger?

  I'll tell you what, um, the more I hear these stories calling somebody a time traveler or a PDF file is kind of a lot of times the same thing.

• 1:34:04Speaker 07

  Moonwalk.

• 1:34:06Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, that's, there's something to that where it's like, well, sliding backwards and also your, the magic's in your butt. We don't have to get into it. Okay, wait, so, you, you, you gotta do mining, they're making you work, and then what are they like, hey, you did good work? You can go to the, fuck this chick. Like, how's that work?

• 1:34:24Speaker 07

  Oh, no, it was, it was just, the brothels were like a daily thing, and I remember like people getting excited about it and things like that. I was kind of with April the whole time. I went up to him sometimes, but not that often.

• 1:34:35Duncan Trussell?

  Did you feel weird that you were, uh, having sex with low IQ moon slaves?

• 1:34:42Speaker 07

  No, but I mean, I remember like them being, I, I mean, no, I just remember that like a, a group of them being escorted by like an off-world German and he said, get those honeypots up there. And they were crying and stuff, so I knew we were all like in a bad situation.

• 1:34:57Kurt Metzger?

  Well, you saw 12 years of slavery.

• 1:34:59Speaker 07

  Yeah, but they, they called them honeyp- I know what a honeypot is in a sense of blackmail, but they called them that, they called them honeypots for some reason.

• 1:35:06Duncan Trussell?

  But you didn't have any kind of, I mean, I get it, you've been tortured, your memory's been warped, you've had to, like, you-

• 1:35:13Kurt Metzger?

  You're on Moonstein Island, apparently.

• 1:35:14Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, you're, you're in this bizarre erotic sexual-

• 1:35:18Kurt Metzger?

  Good title, Moonstein Island, yeah.

• 1:35:19Duncan Trussell?

  Moon hell, but was there a part of you that's like, I probably shouldn't hook up with these honeypots because there's sex slaves?

• 1:35:28Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, I had no, I think I know the answer, but also mention that other guy on base that you asked about this too. Okay, go ahead, sorry, go ahead.

• 1:35:36Speaker 07

  No, I mean, I, I, I had no, no, I, I mean, I was just kinda worried about if I did have children, what would happen to them. I was more thinking about that, so I kinda stayed away from them, because I knew what hap- I mean, I don't know if I knew what happened to those kids, but I mostly stayed away.

• 1:35:49Kurt Metzger?

  This is a very dumb question, but was like, pullout prohibited on the moon?

• 1:35:53Duncan Trussell?

  That's not a dumb question at all.

• 1:35:55Kurt Metzger?

  Because you know what I mean, like, hey, they're like, uh, we get them pregnant, I'm like, I'm worried. That's a good reason to blow it on their face.

• 1:36:01Duncan Trussell?

  For real, can you please look up if you can get pregnant on the moon?

• 1:36:05Kurt Metzger?

  Well, how would they know that?

• 1:36:06Duncan Trussell?

  No, I swear, I read somewhere you cannot get pregnant on the moon.

• 1:36:10Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, you said they could use, wait, hold on, I imagine that you're the nurse, if you're using a glass pad to regulate your pyramid, the hookers, they probably could have a nice slave glass pad to tell, right?

• 1:36:21Speaker 07

  No, they, they weren't allowed, I don't believe, that was their entire job, was it, they were like, you know,

• 1:36:25Duncan Trussell?

  Low gravity.

• 1:36:26Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, so they're not generating children on the moon for that?

• 1:36:29Duncan Trussell?

  Low gravity hinders sperm navigation. Research shows that lower gravity alters sperm motility. It makes it, and the taste, it makes it harder for sperm to navigate to the egg, which can-

• 1:36:39Kurt Metzger?

  It doesn't say taste on there.

• 1:36:41Duncan Trussell?

  I know it doesn't.

• 1:36:42Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, oh, well, thank you for adding value to the show, that's a great point that, see how AI, you can't rely on it?

• 1:36:47Duncan Trussell?

  Haven't you seen-

• 1:36:48Kurt Metzger?

  There's no AI like Duncan's mouth, I'll tell you that much.

• 1:36:54Kurt Metzger?

  Right, Buster?

• 1:36:55Duncan Trussell?

  That's right, Buster.

• 1:36:58Duncan Trussell?

  You just-

• 1:36:58Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, okay, so they, they weren't breeding for kids on the moon, did you say that, or am I making it up? Because I had four claws.

• 1:37:05Speaker 07

  They, they were, that, that was like their task, to be like breeders, that's basically what they were.

• 1:37:09Kurt Metzger?

  So they were getting pregnant?

• 1:37:12Speaker 07

  Yeah, they were getting pregnant, and that was like their entire, kind of like their, that was their task.

• 1:37:16Duncan Trussell?

  Dude, when you look, when you look up at the moon, it's gotta be different than when I look up at the moon.

• 1:37:22Speaker 07

  I mean, yeah, I, I try to keep those thoughts in the back of my head, but sometimes I, I think of it, yeah, sometimes.

• 1:37:28Kurt Metzger?

  Dale, do you know, before we called you, with, for funsies, we're showing the Chelsea Handler clip where she thinks the moon and the sun are the same?

• 1:37:36Speaker 07

  Oh my god, I saw that. Was it, I forget what show that was, but I saw that, yeah.

• 1:37:40Kurt Metzger?

  Say, I mean, not, not to be too, you never saw, uh, an old, uh, lower than 110 IQ, uh, gal named Chelsea Handler on the moon, did you?

• 1:37:49Speaker 07

  No, I don't think, yeah, they were out at the same time and she was amazing.

• 1:37:55Kurt Metzger?

  Let's just say she's not good for fifth density and leave it at that. Okay, wait.

• 1:37:59Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:37:59Kurt Metzger?

  Why did you get to get off the moon? Was there like, am I making this up that somebody wouldn't work and everybody had to kill him?

• 1:38:06Speaker 07

  Yeah, there was a guy, yeah. He, he refused to work and we, they put shock collars on us and if somebody in the group.

• 1:38:12Kurt Metzger?

  Like Hassan Piker's dog?

• 1:38:14Speaker 07

  They shock us all. Say again?

• 1:38:16Kurt Metzger?

  Like Hassan Piker's dog?

• 1:38:18Speaker 07

  Yeah, like his dog, exactly, yeah, yeah. They would shock us all together, yeah.

• 1:38:22Kurt Metzger?

  We're a looter Hassan Piker?

• 1:38:27Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so, and then, okay, so wait, oh, it's like if, so if somebody's like, boy, that's very Steven Spielberg Holocaust movie, isn't it?

• 1:38:33Duncan Trussell?

  It's, it's, it's B D S M. This is Fifty Shades of Grey up there, man. It's like a very sexual situation, right? Like, there's so much sex up there.

• 1:38:44Speaker 07

  Yeah, I mean, but I mean, getting shocked by the collar wasn't fun.

• 1:38:48Duncan Trussell?

  No, I don't mean that that's fun.

• 1:38:49Kurt Metzger?

  You didn't learn to like it?

• 1:38:53Duncan Trussell?

  Submit, surrender.

• 1:38:54Kurt Metzger?

  You know, at first it sucks, but then I can't live without.

• 1:38:57Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:39:00Duncan Trussell?

  Getting that zap.

• 1:39:01Kurt Metzger?

  Right? So, hold on, wait, when, um, when, uh, could, okay, wait, so, the guy that wouldn't work, just to, to know anything about it, was he, like, someone you knew from military? Just some guy and just describe him and why he had to get beaten like Private Pyle?

• 1:39:16Speaker 07

  I, I mean, I, I didn't, I didn't know him. I, I don't, I didn't remember from the base. I remember the guy who started it. He was the first one who brought it up when I didn't even join the program. He brought it up in the barracks. He, he said, "Yeah, man, I was on the moon and there are all these women and I got to sleep with them."

• 1:39:30Kurt Metzger?

  Is that the Puerto Rican guy? And am I just saying he's Puerto Rican? I think I just maybe imagined he was Puerto Rican, because I remember you asking him about this.

• 1:39:39Speaker 07

  Yeah, I mean, he looked kind of Mediterranean.

• 1:39:41Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, that's too close to me, dude. Okay, good. But was that the guy that doesn't even care? He's like, nah, I don't, you really like, don't you care about the guy? He was like, what?

• 1:39:50Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, he didn't. I was like, don't you care about your kids? Like, I don't care. But I found out later, like, the guys were talking about it in the barracks. They said, yeah, he went back into the chair. He couldn't stand his memories. Like, I remember hearing strange things like that of people talking in the barracks like that.

• 1:40:03Kurt Metzger?

  It's like a Nick Fuentes gay guy that was forced to have sex. Okay. I forgot to ask you this last time, too, but when you were going with that lizard that you poked in his eye. Was there like some kid that kept pushing? It was like a, this is one of the details. I'm like, what the fuck? That's one of the weirdest things I ever heard.

• 1:40:19Speaker 07

  What?

• 1:40:20Kurt Metzger?

  You were walking somewhere and there's some kid behind you that kept pushing you?

• 1:40:25Speaker 07

  Yeah, he was butt stroking me with his weapon.

• 1:40:28Duncan Trussell?

  What the fuck?

• 1:40:29Speaker 07

  He was dressed, yeah, like hitting me in the back. He was hitting me in the back.

• 1:40:32Duncan Trussell?

  Is that a military term, butt stroking?

• 1:40:35Speaker 07

  Butt stroke, it is, yes.

• 1:40:37Kurt Metzger?

  What does it mean? I don't, I actually don't know. Is it, oh?

• 1:40:39Speaker 07

  It just means hitting someone with the butt of the weapon.

• 1:40:41Kurt Metzger?

  Like whipping a towel in the locker room, but it's the butt of your.

• 1:40:44Duncan Trussell?

  Butt stroke. It sounds like a John Cougar Mellencamp song.

• 1:40:50Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, that sounds like a John Cougar or John Cougar Mellencamp song. Okay, and was it, but my, dude, I might be fancy, I might be already taking an interesting tale and adding to it. I thought it was like some kid, like he was young, like way too young.

• 1:41:06Speaker 07

  He was young. He was, yeah, he was young. He was probably about 18 and he was very thin.

• 1:41:10Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 1:41:11Speaker 07

  Skinny kid.

• 1:41:12Duncan Trussell?

  Waf, butt stroking you.

• 1:41:14Kurt Metzger?

  Had you poke, you, had you already poked the lizard guy in the eye or not?

• 1:41:17Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:41:18Speaker 07

  No, this is when I was being escorted. Yeah, to the, the density chamber.

• 1:41:22Kurt Metzger?

  So you hadn't even.

• 1:41:23Speaker 07

  Butt stroking me.

• 1:41:24Kurt Metzger?

  You know, I should have asked you this before because if you're like, oh, it's a gas chamber and you just were getting hit by a rifle on the way, I might think I was gonna be killed too.

• 1:41:32Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, sure.

• 1:41:34Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. The whole situation was bad, most definitely. It was very frightening.

• 1:41:39Kurt Metzger?

  It sounds like I'm trying to be your jag attorney in this military case. No, you didn't mean to. You felt scared. You didn't know.

• 1:41:45Duncan Trussell?

  I'm sorry if it seems like we're making light of any of this. It sounds incredibly.

• 1:41:50Kurt Metzger?

  I'm not comfortable having my own memories triggered. That's why. Hey, okay, so, wait, so, okay, so.

• 1:41:55Duncan Trussell?

  Does it feel different to come on the moon?

• 1:41:59Speaker 07

  Not that I remember.

• 1:42:01Kurt Metzger?

  That's a David Bowie song. That's a trick question. Okay, wait. Okay, wait. How did you get off the moon? And is that the thing with the Taijitans?

• 1:42:09Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:42:09Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah. Well, no, that was Rob. Robert kinda kept track of his people, it seemed like, while he was, you know, in this program, as he was time traveling and everything. And he talked to an off-world German in a, in a uniform, and then pointed at me. And he came up with like a device, and, you know, called this other off-world German, who was actually a first-class petty officer on base. We had several off-world Germans on the base.

• 1:42:33Kurt Metzger?

  What is an off-world world German? I never asked.

• 1:42:36Speaker 07

  Off-world German is ba- is just that. They're Germans that have their own world, that they...

• 1:42:42Kurt Metzger?

  I guess, you know what? I guess it's all there in the name, isn't it?

• 1:42:44Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, off-world German.

• 1:42:46Kurt Metzger?

  But they, they, these are the ones that, I think you were talking about the real thing, and, and I used to not think Marina Orsich was real. She may or may not be, but I know channeling information about making rocket ships is real, because that's how we got our fucking rockets.

• 1:43:01Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:43:01Kurt Metzger?

  And that's the public record.

• 1:43:03Duncan Trussell?

  That's public record.

• 1:43:03Kurt Metzger?

  That jerking off is half of rocketry for some... I don't get it. Maybe it's Osiris's penis. Anyway.

• 1:43:09Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 1:43:10Kurt Metzger?

  Um, so they're the ones that went to Antarctica, and so they, what did they hook up with lizards there?

• 1:43:16Speaker 07

  Well, they just, they found, I was told they found tech, and buried in the ice. They were told where to find it, buried in the ice, and then they took it to South America and reverse engineered it. And that's why there's so many German communities in South America, primarily because of that.

• 1:43:30Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, yeah, that's true. There are. And in Argentina specifically, Joseph P. Farrell, the best, some of the best UFO guy research, um, he talks about it, because South Africa had a space program with post-on-world Germans. America brought Mengela here, just so everybody knows. So we were doing some wild, wild shit.

• 1:43:51Duncan Trussell?

  Daryl, I don't mean to ask a sinister question, or kind of a mindfuck question, but, you know, you've been exposed to this technology. It can wipe your memory, replace memories, send you through time. Do you ever, in your life there in Florida, think that you could potentially still be there on the moon, and this is just part of the torture?

• 1:44:13Speaker 07

  No, I don't think about that. I've never, no, I've, I've, I've, I've never thought about that one, no.

• 1:44:18Kurt Metzger?

  Well, don't start.

• 1:44:19Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, don't think about that.

• 1:44:20Speaker 07

  Yeah. Thank God, yeah.

• 1:44:22Duncan Trussell?

  Don't think about that, sorry.

• 1:44:23Kurt Metzger?

  But, look, okay, so, oh, that's right, I forgot this part. So, when he did that, by the way, I want to point out that Robert looks like Mike Pence, if you missed last week's episode. You gotta imagine this guy looked like Mike Pence, which is like, one of the best details of a story I've ever heard in my life.

• 1:44:39Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 1:44:40Kurt Metzger?

  And so, there's like a, like, it's not Planet Germany, but you said that it was like they, it kinda, it was like just, steampunk, what did it look like?

• 1:44:50Speaker 07

  What, what, uh, the off-world German or Robert's like original timeline?

• 1:44:56Kurt Metzger?

  No, no, we did that, the timeline last week, but the off-world German. So you get out of the moon thing, and now you're, what is that, Nok- Nerkwafers, you know what I'm talking about?

• 1:45:04Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, Nokwaf, and it was, I was on a ship. I got to their world and it looked like the 40s. Eventually, I, they gained my trust and they wanted to recruit me. And they let me on their world, and yeah, it was, men wore suits and fedoras, and women wore like dresses and pillbox hats. It was very like old world.

• 1:45:21Duncan Trussell?

  Did you go to any cafes?

• 1:45:24Speaker 07

  They had cafes, they had like a sidewalk system that was very fast that you could take, to kinda take you any other side of town, like a conveyor belt.

• 1:45:31Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:45:32Speaker 07

  They had like a-

• 1:45:32Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, wait, wait, like the Indrid cold?

• 1:45:36Kurt Metzger?

  It was like, like a, that's like a jet suit.

• 1:45:38Duncan Trussell?

  Charlotte Airport.

• 1:45:39Kurt Metzger?

  Like Charlotte Airport?

• 1:45:40Speaker 07

  Yeah. Like, like, like you would get onto a slower conveyor belt and you'd eventually hit the main one and it would speed you up, like they were branches on the sides.

• 1:45:50Duncan Trussell?

  What was the climate like?

• 1:45:52Speaker 07

  It was very nice. It was, it wasn't hot like here. Beings, they can regulate their world, so they can get rid of things like, you know, storms, you know, earthquakes, even the weather, they can influence the weather once, you know, that's like, uh-

• 1:46:06Kurt Metzger?

  That's a great point, because we currently can do that here on Earth. I don't know if everybody knows that.

• 1:46:09Speaker 07

  Exactly, exactly.

• 1:46:10Kurt Metzger?

  There's a treaty to not do that from 1975. That means we could do that.

• 1:46:15Duncan Trussell?

  Did you ever see what happened in Dubai when they did that shit? Do you remember that when Dubai flooded, all those Ferraris?

• 1:46:20Kurt Metzger?

  That might have been, well, guess what? In this Iran conflict, Iran, and I remember hearing this years ago, but not believing it. Iran accused of using weather weapons to give them a drought for 40 years. Well, they sent drones that blew up the harp we had in the United Emirates, and their drought ended immediately.

• 1:46:38Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:46:39Kurt Metzger?

  Now, think of all that bullshit they told you about your farts are causing the earth to end. It's complete horse shit. And I believe, dude, I was in a religious cult that only predicted the end of the world maybe twice tops.

• 1:46:51Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:46:51Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, like 20 times less than Al Gore. Okay, and like, it's, I'm stupid, but I'm gonna notice that eventually.

• 1:46:58Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, right.

• 1:46:59Kurt Metzger?

  That there's more ice caps, but in fact, like Tanner's taint has shrunken.

• 1:47:04Duncan Trussell?

  I noticed that too.

• 1:47:06Kurt Metzger?

  Well, it's generational.

• 1:47:06Duncan Trussell?

  And I thought it was climate change.

• 1:47:09Kurt Metzger?

  I've been, you, did you check? It looks okay. Well, how long's he got?

• 1:47:12Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 1:47:13Kurt Metzger?

  Tanner, I mean, there's almost no barrier between his ass and his balls.

• 1:47:15Duncan Trussell?

  Are you talking about his taint or his hole?

• 1:47:17Kurt Metzger?

  It's all the zoomers. Microplastics. Think of your taint as a baby seal. Microplastics or a six-pack ring from back in the day. It swims into it, it can't grow.

• 1:47:27Duncan Trussell?

  This is the message we need to get out there.

• 1:47:29Kurt Metzger?

  And that's why these kids have no Gator, and I'm sure Daryl's gonna back. I, if I would bet anything, is Daryl back this up? That Gator is in the taint, and that's why these kids don't know what gay is no more.

• 1:47:39Duncan Trussell?

  Daryl, is Gator in the taint?

• 1:47:41Kurt Metzger?

  Did Robert say that bit of information?

• 1:47:43Speaker 07

  You always feel the tingle, yeah.

• 1:47:45Kurt Metzger?

  Well, now you're getting debriefed again.

• 1:47:52Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, the Ger- all four of the Germans are like exactly what I expected from that Star Trek. But what, what I wanna know is, why were you on the Taijeet? Do you know how it's spelled, by the way, Taijeetin? I, I was, I know how I think it is.

• 1:48:05Duncan Trussell?

  T-H-A-I-J-E-E-T-I-N.

• 1:48:08Kurt Metzger?

  Is it?

• 1:48:08Duncan Trussell?

  Taijeetin.

• 1:48:09Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, not you, him. Sorry, Daryl, you.

• 1:48:12Duncan Trussell?

  Sorry.

• 1:48:12Speaker 07

  Oh, yeah, I would agree.

• 1:48:15Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, it's nothing like that. It's T A Y. Duncan got every letter wrong.

• 1:48:20Duncan Trussell?

  Taijitin. It's a restaurant I used to go to.

• 1:48:23Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, but that's not insignificant. That might be a synchronicity to get them all wrong. That might be your psychic powers.

• 1:48:29Duncan Trussell?

  This is misspelled. And this is a musical. By the way, this is a musical artist.

• 1:48:33Kurt Metzger?

  Hey, do you like, okay, do you remember that chick, Little Tay?

• 1:48:37Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, of course. Yeah, I remember Little Tay.

• 1:48:40Duncan Trussell?

  Everybody was worried about Little Tay.

• 1:48:41Kurt Metzger?

  Well, it's fine. She's on OnlyFans, so she's a millionaire, but it's fine. It worked out okay. She makes pornography that her brother films for a living.

• 1:48:49Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, God.

• 1:48:51Kurt Metzger?

  It's legal. What?

• 1:48:54Kurt Metzger?

  Look, if these, oh, by the way, look, now there's a picture of Taijitin's judging our culture. Yo, bitch, who got you pregnant with your own husband, bitch? Don't judge me. Am I where I'm from?

• 1:49:05Kurt Metzger?

  Um, okay.

• 1:49:06Duncan Trussell?

  I don't think they actually dress like that.

• 1:49:07Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, wait, Tanner, can you go back to the top? And dude, you're the first guy I ever heard to mention this, this name? Okay, what is that? What, what, look at the writing. No, no, go down. What is that shit right there? Taijitin language. Oh, echoes of the infinite. Now,

• 1:49:25Kurt Metzger?

  is that some fucking cabala shit?

• 1:49:26Duncan Trussell?

  No, this is a game. This is some kind of game.

• 1:49:29Kurt Metzger?

  I know, but that's, yo, first of all, voice to skull, which is a thing, that's in Metal Gear. Oh, by the way, uh, the guys in the civilian deception operations that they do, they call themselves Dun- the civilian leaders of those operations, call themselves dungeon masters. The video game thing in the Epstein files, QAnon it's called. QAnon was, Epstein was Q.

• 1:49:53Duncan Trussell?

  Pokemon.

• 1:49:54Kurt Metzger?

  He's the char- Q's based on Epstein. Epstein's above Mossad. He's, he's up at Rothschild level. He's alive because of that, I would say. Okay. We have this.

• 1:50:05Duncan Trussell?

  This is their language?

• 1:50:05Kurt Metzger?

  Daryl, by the way, sorry to not explain this. We have a thing boasted of somebody claiming it's Taijitin language, which you can't see. But if you remember their writing, could you, what would you say it looked like?

• 1:50:17Speaker 07

  I don't remember their writing. I remember their language was something like,

• 1:50:22Speaker 07

  um, like almost like a Native American, like una hot talk. They had like a, like a, an audible, like a, a regular language. They only have in like their religious ceremonies and things like that.

• 1:50:32Kurt Metzger?

  Did they have any history that they told you that they knew about with them on Earth?

• 1:50:36Duncan Trussell?

  Look, look, enlarge it. Cause look, look, maybe the letters, look, look. Let's see if we could see any of those, what he just said.

• 1:50:42Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, Arath. See, that's the thing, that name. Dude, the name you said of the mother one is, is like Kabbalah shit for real.

• 1:50:48Duncan Trussell?

  Han, Samash, Path.

• 1:50:52Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 1:50:53Duncan Trussell?

  Chat.

• 1:50:54Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, wait, hold on, sorry. This, I, I know this is the worst interview you've ever had in your life, including after

• 1:51:00Speaker 07

  No.

• 1:51:00Kurt Metzger?

  being tortured on the moon, but

• 1:51:04Kurt Metzger?

  I understand playing near guitar after torture.

• 1:51:06Duncan Trussell?

  You're still on the moon, Daryl!

• 1:51:10Duncan Trussell?

  It's this is a

• 1:51:12Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, okay. Because, cause so far what we have is there's some operation, everybody's gotta fuck. And the necromancer thing, I said, keep that in mind, Duncan. I mean, it's funny, but just listen.

• 1:51:23Duncan Trussell?

  I'm listening.

• 1:51:24Kurt Metzger?

  Keep that in mind. Um, why, when, like, they picked you up from the Germans and the lizards were, weren't they fighting over you or something or calling you a package?

• 1:51:34Speaker 07

  Yeah, it was like, we almost went to like a, a space station. And it was almost like a United Nations where trade took place and, you know, discussions of war and peace would take place. And yeah, they, they brought me out there and there was a man and a woman that came forward. And she, at first she started and she said, you know, the pa, you know, the, you know, the package or whatever you wanna call it. Like, they were talking about me like in a third person in a weird way. You know, it rightfully belongs to us. If you don't give them back, you know, but the reptile said, but we've invested so much time.

• 1:52:08Kurt Metzger?

  Why did you belong to them?

• 1:52:10Speaker 07

  Yeah, so I belonged to them.

• 1:52:11Kurt Metzger?

  But why?

• 1:52:12Speaker 07

  And then the mail came, I'm sorry?

• 1:52:14Kurt Metzger?

  Why? Like, what's the legal claim there?

• 1:52:17Speaker 07

  Well, it was because I was supposed to go directly to them and to Solar Warden immediately. And that was the original contract, but instead because of my scores or something, they took me, like the off-world Germans took me, who was just, you know, they worked for the reptiles.

• 1:52:31Duncan Trussell?

  But you would rather be with the off-world Germans, right?

• 1:52:34Speaker 07

  Yeah, I mean, yeah, they're still human, but I mean,

• 1:52:38Kurt Metzger?

  Then reptiles, not then Taijitans.

• 1:52:41Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you, if they can tell, like, the reptiles could tell that a German's getting too close to you, they might torture you in front of them or something, so they don't get close to you, like, they don't want anybody to have any kind of closeness, connection, anything, only the mission.

• 1:52:53Kurt Metzger?

  So, okay, just, did you hear that detail?

• 1:52:55Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:52:56Kurt Metzger?

  So just think of anybody being tortured or abused. It, it, like, it's, the theme is the exact same thing, it's you gotta keep people away.

• 1:53:05Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:53:05Kurt Metzger?

  Because this demon, if you get too close to me, might torture you.

• 1:53:09Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:53:09Kurt Metzger?

  They're putting cabal names on the thing, and they're fighting, because why, at the end of the day, why did that Tajetans even want you?

• 1:53:17Speaker 07

  Why, why did they even want me?

• 1:53:18Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 1:53:19Duncan Trussell?

  Cause you're awesome.

• 1:53:19Kurt Metzger?

  No, I, I know, but-

• 1:53:20Speaker 07

  Well, because, well, I mean, like I said, the first thing Robert told me was, you could speak to the children, and he said they spoke a type of pig Latin, it's almost like baby talk with a few words here and there.

• 1:53:32Kurt Metzger?

  Didn't they breed you?

• 1:53:32Speaker 07

  And none of the adults could do it. Say again?

• 1:53:35Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, I thought they bred you or something. I thought that's where they really were fucking breeding you out.

• 1:53:40Speaker 07

  No, with the Tajetans, yes.

• 1:53:43Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, that's what I mean, like, what I'm saying is, the overall story is, because when you hear UFO stories and abduction stories, and satanic stories, and that stupid movie, Women Talking, which is about an interesting story, but the title's the worst title in the world, about the Mennonite settlement in South America. These are white, think of them as, like, land Tajetans.

• 1:54:02Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:54:02Kurt Metzger?

  Going to South America to set up a Mennonite colony, the men were gassing the women at night, crawling in the windows, uh, graping them, and then because they're religious, they go, oh, it was a demon came in the night. Now think of how much that sounds, like an abduction where they harvest your semen.

• 1:54:19Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:54:20Kurt Metzger?

  And this dude's story is, like, cosmically, being passed around, and, and everybody's story is this, going back to the Bible and Nephilim. And why do they need your goddamn semen so bad? The thing that Daryl said, if I'm not mistaken, okay, yeah. Didn't you say like their DNA is stagnant and I want to really ask you what that means?

• 1:54:42Speaker 07

  Yeah, that is what, well, they've just been around. They're one of the original beings like in this new consciousness that we're living in. They're one of the, like, the beginning and they've just been, you know, interbreeding with each, they don't inbred, they, they, they, they don't do that. But it's just they've been interbreeding with each other for so long that they've become stagnant over time.

• 1:55:01Kurt Metzger?

  But does stagnant mean you can't, you like can't have a mutation? Is that what that means? Or is it something else?

• 1:55:07Speaker 07

  No, it's just, just that they wanted like a different gene pool to go into coming to their, their gene pool.

• 1:55:13Kurt Metzger?

  Well, it sounds like, okay, the reason I'm asking is it sounds like, you know, be polite because you're fucking them, but they are inbred. That's what happens.

• 1:55:20Duncan Trussell?

  It is.

• 1:55:20Kurt Metzger?

  We saw Waterworld. Wait, but, okay, so this is, here's my whacko theory about your story. And I, it's amazing to tell a veteran of the secret space program, a crazier thing I think than what he told me. But I think these like aliens in the fifth density, I have a suspicion that death is not so much an either or as a spectrum, much like gender. Uh, and that, okay, and that, um, they're, they're, okay, let me be just really three density about it.

• 1:55:52Duncan Trussell?

  Go ahead.

• 1:55:53Kurt Metzger?

  They're fucking undead. Um, Jason Giorgiani, who I had on my show, taught, and he was a, I don't know why I never put it together until he said it, because it should be obvious. Twenty and back, going to a planet that's in the past, basically faster than light. All it, like, you gotta think of it in terms of just location and not time and space. Just think he's at this point, like, in a dress. Think of time as miles if you want. So the dinosaurs are seventy-five million miles away.

• 1:56:18Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:56:18Kurt Metzger?

  Star Trek doesn't teach you that. It makes you think of it like it's nautical. Right? Star Trek doesn't teach you to think about it the way you should think about it, which is a combination. And I don't think that's a mistake, by the way. And I think these necromancers, so remember I said like, what happens if you kill your own grandpa, the grandfather paradox? And, uh, my fifth wife Jenna said this, I didn't even come up, but I asked her like, what would happen if you kill your grandpa? She goes, don't you become without sin? And, uh, and, uh, because we're watching Daryl's channel, you're, you weren't born out of a pussy, okay? But you're still a consciousness. So now you've erased, it's like erasing your criminal record. And now you're a snake eating its own tail in the fifth dimension. What does that mean?

• 1:56:59Kurt Metzger?

  Giorgiani said, look at that pyramid. It's like this brutalist architecture that's timeless. And how come, and we laughed about on my show, they're all white? Yo, in evolution, so you evolved from some, but whatever, but none of you are a little tan, you're all from Abba, all of you? That sounds like somebody in a different timeframe where it goes in a circle and it doesn't, and that explains the fucking with it. See, calling us lower than snails, I take great offense to that, and you could tell your lizard buddies that, and I'm sorry. But you motherfuckers, I think these are fucking, uh, dead people that may or may not know they are. Their, their tree of choice has been made, but that's just, that's the part of you that's you.

• 1:57:44Kurt Metzger?

  There's other parts of you that are now being dispersed. So imagine this, so right, so then you're telling the Hindu shit. And, and you have to be on this plane to accumulate karma, the crypto of Indians. And then you could go on vacation, some of the higher planes, but you're gonna have to reincarnate and get more money. I love fucking this system. And they don't call it a cone, they call it like a tower, right? The 14 lokas, which I tried to explain.

• 1:58:08Duncan Trussell?

  Hinduism?

• 1:58:09Kurt Metzger?

  And you know lokas?

• 1:58:10Duncan Trussell?

  In Buddhism, the idea is to get the fuck out.

• 1:58:13Kurt Metzger?

  Buddhism, I would say, scale it down one level.

• 1:58:15Duncan Trussell?

  By the way, Daryl, do you think you could play guitar for us now?

• 1:58:20Kurt Metzger?

  And.

• 1:58:21Speaker 07

  No, I, I, I haven't played in years, and I told Robert that, and he said, Daryl, but you're playing right now. Yeah, he said that to me, like.

• 1:58:28Kurt Metzger?

  Wes, Daryl, but you're playing right now, that's right. So if I'm moving you around like that and going back and forth, you're breaking causality.

• 1:58:34Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 1:58:34Kurt Metzger?

  So remember, yeah.

• 1:58:35Speaker 07

  And you're sharing consciousness, yeah, with, with the other.

• 1:58:39Kurt Metzger?

  Like, that's gonna fuck your shit up, dude, like, I'll make you schizophrenic, I'm sorry.

• 1:58:45Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, man. What a mindfuck. I gotta pit, I'm so sorry, Daryl, I have to go, uh.

• 1:58:51Kurt Metzger?

  All right, well, can you hang just for a little bit more, or do you gotta go?

• 1:58:56Speaker 07

  I have to go to the bathroom too, but I can hang for a while.

• 1:58:58Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, cuz we all, let's all, let's all go to the moon and have a quick.

• 1:59:04Kurt Metzger?

  All right, cool, I'll be right back. I got pissed so bad, dude. I'll be right back, dude.

• 1:59:19Kurt Metzger?

  Took it, those glasses, I, I didn't notice until just now. Are you sure you don't want to put your crown with that? I mean, that's-

• 1:59:25Duncan Trussell?

  I can't because of the, the headphones.

• 1:59:28Kurt Metzger?

  Really?

• 1:59:29Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 1:59:30Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, right. Well-

• 1:59:32Duncan Trussell?

  Classic king problem.

• 1:59:35Kurt Metzger?

  I, I think you should wear headphones with those glasses all the time.

• 1:59:39Duncan Trussell?

  I will.

• 1:59:40Kurt Metzger?

  Hey, who's this guy? Are you back from Ibiza?

• 1:59:42Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, Ibiza. Uh, let's, let's, Darrell, um, wait, what was your question for?

• 1:59:50Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, we're talking-

• 1:59:51Duncan Trussell?

  We should let him off the hook here. You've been on the, do you have time?

• 1:59:53Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, he said yes before we peed.

• 1:59:55Speaker 07

  Yeah, I have time, yeah.

• 1:59:56Kurt Metzger?

  Okay. Uh, I, believe it or not, people are not demanding to hear every part of Darrell's story like you would think in New York Times.

• 2:00:03Duncan Trussell?

  I know.

• 2:00:04Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, okay, so, how, so was this 20 years, this period? I just want to kind of like, you know, I don't want people to cling to time and space watching our show and hold us to anything, but, uh, what was it like?

• 2:00:17Duncan Trussell?

  It was in between, it was in between the echoes.

• 2:00:19Kurt Metzger?

  So you did a full 20 or more than 20?

• 2:00:21Speaker 07

  Say again?

• 2:00:22Kurt Metzger?

  So did you do a full 20 years exactly or more than 20?

• 2:00:26Speaker 07

  I, it was like 22. He said, Robert said that they gave me like a two-year extension because they wanted me to stay in the program longer. So it was like 22.

• 2:00:34Kurt Metzger?

  And are there people that want to, like, or did Robert, was he a guy that wanted to, I guess?

• 2:00:41Speaker 07

  Wanted to join the, what do you mean, wanted to what?

• 2:00:43Kurt Metzger?

  Like re-up? Like guys that keep going, you know, like American Sniper keeps going back?

• 2:00:47Duncan Trussell?

  Sure there are.

• 2:00:47Speaker 07

  Oh, yeah, you could do 40 years in total because the reason that is, is the age regression, regression process. After you go over 40 years, like 60 years, it's in 20-year intervals. And after you go 40 years, uh, you risk, uh, psychological damage. It could drive you insane, like being age regressed too many times.

• 2:01:06Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 2:01:07Kurt Metzger?

  Um, yeah, well, I mean, every reality show, look at these broads with their uncanny face. Did, uh, did they tell you any politicians that were like 40 and backs or, uh, you know? It sounds like he told you stuff that you didn't know yet, but do, is there any notables that were, they were like something that I, neither of us would have guessed as, uh, well, two crazy people, but who, who, like, who were people that were in this program?

• 2:01:34Kurt Metzger?

  That you heard of.

• 2:01:35Speaker 07

  He didn't, yeah, like, like, he said politicians and things like that, they were considered enough. Like, all they were allowed was, you know, we were talking about before about the drug, like, they would do that to keep themselves young. But as far as age regression, you actually have to be in the program and like politicians and musicians, they're not considered important enough. So they have to be, you know.

• 2:01:56Duncan Trussell?

  Why, why is that?

• 2:01:56Kurt Metzger?

  Have any of them earned their way into it?

• 2:01:59Speaker 07

  Well, i- i- it's almost, I think the main reason is just because they, they're wiping your memory. Now, there could be, I'm not saying, but he said, yeah, like, they're not considered important enough to have and to go into an age regression.

• 2:02:11Duncan Trussell?

  Does the age regression wipe your memory or is that something like you opt in for? Or do you, you, everyone gets amnesia if they get regressed?

• 2:02:21Speaker 07

  Well, it, it, no, it, it, it doesn't wipe your memory. They put you in a stasis chamber. He said they have to bring you back two weeks early from when you first left. They put you in a stasis chamber for two weeks and it takes about a week for every 10 years. And they basically give you like a series of injections that slowly age regress you over a period of time.

• 2:02:40Duncan Trussell?

  It's like a temporal decompression chamber or something.

• 2:02:44Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, it's basically just like a stasis chamber to keep you alive. So you don't need food and water and they just give you injections over time.

• 2:02:51Kurt Metzger?

  What is the drug they're injecting in you that, is it a drug that is like genetic or it's, it's Ozempic, believe it or not? Is, okay, is the drug some kind of, some kind of weird thing that's not like doing a genetic thing, but a time thing? Or is it, do you know anything about it at all?

• 2:03:08Speaker 07

  I don't, I, I think I asked Robert about it and he said he didn't know like how, what it was or how it worked. He wasn't sure. He didn't even have access to it. Like, that was something like reptilian. He had access to med beds and everything else, but not age regression. That was like a higher clearance in him.

• 2:03:22Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so I've seen a lot of like, what seemed like very fraudulent horseshit where people go, oh, the med beds are coming. And Trump posted and then took it down, a med bed thing. Did you see that?

• 2:03:33Duncan Trussell?

  Yes.

• 2:03:34Speaker 07

  Yeah, yes, I did. Yeah, soft disclosure, yeah.

• 2:03:37Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so what is it, what is it they're telling, what did he tell you about Trump? Cause it seems like Trump is the biggest rug pull I've ever seen.

• 2:03:45Speaker 07

  Well, I mean, he just said, he said Trump's with us. He said it's a military operation. He said, he said he's not in charge. Like, don't worry about him. He's just a figurehead. That's the way he was speaking. He was just, we asked him to work for us and he agreed to it.

• 2:04:00Kurt Metzger?

  Um, and what, what did he predict regarding Israel? And were there any other details besides, uh, I think he said like, oh, go ahead.

• 2:04:10Speaker 07

  Well, as far as predictions, he gave me a lot. I mean, and he, he did bring up the whole Israel last thing. He did. I know you don't, you don't think this, but he said Q in the beginning would be real and then it would go away for four or five months. And when it comes back, that's not real, but it doesn't matter because it's already started.

• 2:04:26Kurt Metzger?

  That's a very interesting detail. That's very interesting what you said. Tracy Twoman, you can find the video for, I bring her shit up a lot. And she would look the early Q and she said something very similar to what he just said. And because they're all into games and they're not creative, these fucking lizard people. So they, they want to take a game and copy it, just like how they do with, uh, you know, we talked about last week. What's better than a corporation taking the original IP?

• 2:04:54Speaker 07

  Right.

• 2:04:54Kurt Metzger?

  And then, uh, changing it enough to make it their IP.

• 2:04:56Speaker 07

  Right.

• 2:04:58Kurt Metzger?

  What's the predictions?

• 2:05:01Speaker 07

  My predictions, he said to me that, geez, we would declare war on Mexico. That's already happened.

• 2:05:07Kurt Metzger?

  I've done that personally.

• 2:05:09Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. What else?

• 2:05:10Speaker 07

  Let's say again.

• 2:05:11Kurt Metzger?

  I've personally declared war on Mexico.

• 2:05:13Duncan Trussell?

  I don't think you should have done that, by the way.

• 2:05:15Kurt Metzger?

  No, there's a line.

• 2:05:16Duncan Trussell?

  I don't want to get weird or political, but why? Why are you going to war with Mexico?

• 2:05:20Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, wait, hold on. I want to make sure this is fair.

• 2:05:22Speaker 07

  Well, it's to get rid of the cartels right now.

• 2:05:24Duncan Trussell?

  Not for Metzger. I don't think that's why.

• 2:05:25Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, okay. This little son of a bitch.

• 2:05:27Speaker 07

  Yeah, yeah, it's probably not. It isn't. Yeah.

• 2:05:29Duncan Trussell?

  Why do you want to go to war with Mexico?

• 2:05:31Kurt Metzger?

  Um, because, I want my.

• 2:05:33Duncan Trussell?

  No, current does. Current, why is it declared war on another country?

• 2:05:36Kurt Metzger?

  Because, because, um.

• 2:05:37Speaker 07

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well.

• 2:05:38Kurt Metzger?

  My asshole's destroyed and not the fun way.

• 2:05:41Duncan Trussell?

  But that, that's no reason to wage war.

• 2:05:43Kurt Metzger?

  All right. All right. You got me. Maybe I was take, maybe I was projecting, disappointed myself for eating the thing. Jenna told me not to eat it. She said, you're gonna pay for it, then, and then you're gonna cry and blame Mexico again.

• 2:05:56Duncan Trussell?

  You can't, you can't go to war.

• 2:05:57Kurt Metzger?

  And you know what? She got me. She, she knew who I was because here I am. Okay, wait, hold on. Tanner, this little son of a bitch. Put that picture up because remember when I asked Tanner what gobble mode is and he played dumb like he don't know?

• 2:06:10Kurt Metzger?

  And if I talk to Daryl, I know. So Daryl, have you heard of Goblin Mode?

• 2:06:14Speaker 07

  I haven't.

• 2:06:15Kurt Metzger?

  Hashtag Goblin Mode. It's like a, you never heard of it at all? Like internet thing of like, like, you know, I don't know. What do these kids say? Red pill, queer bait?

• 2:06:27Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, Goblin Mode is like you're disgusting, you never moved out of your parent. What is it? Tanner, you explain it, because you lied. It's like you didn't know what it was.

• 2:06:35Kurt Metzger?

  And if you don't want to say, maybe look it up.

• 2:06:40Kurt Metzger?

  Are you conferring on your answer?

• 2:06:43Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, wait, wait, wait. Say that again, Daryl, sorry. What'd you say?

• 2:06:46Speaker 07

  I said like Bug Man stuff? I've heard that.

• 2:06:48Kurt Metzger?

  What's Bug Man? Wait.

• 2:06:50Speaker 07

  A Bug Man is this, it's kind of like, he doesn't necessarily have to live with his parents, but he collects oddball stuff and he kind of...

• 2:06:56Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, that's Tanner, all right. That's, you've nailed Tanner, who couldn't wait to read the Libra V

• 2:07:02Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, wait, a Bug Man doesn't live with his parents but collects weird shit?

• 2:07:08Speaker 07

  Well, it's just like a guy that kind of like wastes his money and stuff like that.

• 2:07:12Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, like on those like...

• 2:07:13Kurt Metzger?

  No, that's me. I thought, I thought a Bug Man...

• 2:07:16Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 2:07:17Kurt Metzger?

  You know what I honestly thought a Bug Man was? You, you jerked off one more time in your parents' house and never got caught? Got out of the game. One more run, Lord. So, Lord, let's give me this one, and then I'm gonna retire.

• 2:07:31Duncan Trussell?

  Do you, have you ever heard of John of Goblin?

• 2:07:35Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, wait. So Goblin Mode is like, can you, Tanner, what is it?

• 2:07:40Duncan Trussell?

  Tanner doesn't know.

• 2:07:41Kurt Metzger?

  Goblin Mode is when you like bed rot. When you what? Like you bed rot and... Oh, that's not a med bed, that's a regular bed. Yeah, like you're just... Oh, do you mean like that time the fire department had to pry me off my couch? Yeah. Because my skinned, you ever hear when fat people fuse to the couch?

• 2:07:58Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, it happens. They have new couches where that doesn't happen.

• 2:08:01Kurt Metzger?

  I thought Goblin Mode was like all like, I think it's Zoom or age, I don't know my generational astrology.

• 2:08:07Duncan Trussell?

  I get them mixed up.

• 2:08:08Kurt Metzger?

  But they were going, I just lay around and I'm fat and I jerk off a lot. Goblin Mode.

• 2:08:12Duncan Trussell?

  You're just pasted with your own jizz. You're just like a pasty thing.

• 2:08:16Kurt Metzger?

  So then, so Tanner, who pretended to know what Goblin Mode was, and it was a test, and he failed. He, he fucking threw up, Daryl, and says, I went Goblin Mode on the moon. Which not only, by the way, he was sentenced to do that, I'm like, you Tanner? You son of a bitch. Uh, wait, wait, okay. But Bug Man, with this thing as crazy as, as we were doing this stupid bit of Goblin Mode, he said Bug Man, I'd never heard of that phrase. Is that internet shit? Like what?

• 2:08:44Speaker 07

  Yeah, I think it's internet stuff. It's just a guy, you know, who just...

• 2:08:48Kurt Metzger?

  There is no common culture no more dude. There's nothing I can reference.

• 2:08:51Duncan Trussell?

  Everything is shattered.

• 2:08:52Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, it's great for podcasting, I gotta say. Cause Duncan has never heard of anything. And we, we burn up hours of just showing him things that back in the day.

• 2:09:01Duncan Trussell?

  I haven't heard of anything.

• 2:09:03Kurt Metzger?

  Dude, on the moon, did they have like, hey, do they, wait, okay, so I know the moon's kind of a prisoner thing. Did they have like, anything besides fucking?

• 2:09:13Speaker 07

  No, I mean, not really. Nothing, no.

• 2:09:15Duncan Trussell?

  No libraries?

• 2:09:19Kurt Metzger?

  You tell me there's not... Did you think it?

• 2:09:22Speaker 07

  I was in like, I was sent there to be punished, so I really didn't get to see around that much.

• 2:09:27Kurt Metzger?

  Did you ever think of Shawshank Redemption, write to the lizard governor and get a lot, and they're like, oh, what? Did you? Dude, no libraries. You're real, that's hilarious. Okay, so, but I mean, it's a slave thing. Look, let's say it happened on Earth. That's the same way it works on Earth.

• 2:09:42Duncan Trussell?

  No, it doesn't. Prisons on Earth are way fucking worse than moon prisons.

• 2:09:45Kurt Metzger?

  Not prisons, slavery.

• 2:09:48Kurt Metzger?

  So remember 300,000 kids came in and we can't find them now?

• 2:09:51Duncan Trussell?

  I'm pretty sure there's a lot of slaves who might hear this story and be like, please put me on the fucking moon. You get to fuck.

• 2:09:57Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, okay, but, what, did you see, was everybody an adult on the moon that was a slave doing this? Or did you see any grim, uh, I don't wanna say vouch and destiny content, but you know what I'm saying?

• 2:10:09Duncan Trussell?

  Oh no.

• 2:10:11Speaker 07

  Was it all adults?

• 2:10:12Kurt Metzger?

  How, how anime did this get, I guess is what I'm saying. Is it, it's not like...

• 2:10:16Speaker 07

  Well, I mean, it, it seemed like, you know, it was like Logan's Run. It was like everybody was in their twenties. I mean, women had children, but everybody was around abouts in their twenties or thirties.

• 2:10:26Duncan Trussell?

  Were there daycares on the moon?

• 2:10:29Speaker 07

  No, but women stayed hu- home and just took care of their children, like the, the higher levels, like the nurses and the-

• 2:10:35Kurt Metzger?

  The ones that are not slaves, because I imagine the slaves here-

• 2:10:37Speaker 07

  Yeah, the ones that weren't slaves.

• 2:10:38Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so this-

• 2:10:39Speaker 07

  They pretty much got their babies taken away after weaning, as far as I remember.

• 2:10:42Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so this is, this is, I mean, this is not a joke either, before we called you, Duncan, this is 100% true, his mom went to John of God, who turned out to be running a breeding slave operation where they'd take the ba- not on the moon, where was John of God?

• 2:10:57Duncan Trussell?

  I don't know, like, um, South America.

• 2:11:00Speaker 07

  South America?

• 2:11:00Kurt Metzger?

  Good friend Oprah, now, did he tell you anything about Oprah?

• 2:11:06Speaker 07

  Who? I mean, not really, no, I, I don't remember anything, he told me about, you know, other actors, if you want to bring that up.

• 2:11:12Kurt Metzger?

  Like who, yeah, oh, yes, oh, yes.

• 2:11:13Duncan Trussell?

  Here we go.

• 2:11:14Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 2:11:15Duncan Trussell?

  TMZ.

• 2:11:15Speaker 07

  I mean, when I was on the, yeah, when I was in the bar on base, I remember the Satanist said he got to meet Tom Cruise and he bought chrome off of him, they nicknamed it chrome. And then I asked Robert, and, well, he, he said that he was the main distributor for the Scientologist, he said that whole, I'm in love with Katie Holmes thing he did, he just got done shooting it up in the dressing room, so that's exactly how you act, like you're on speed.

• 2:11:38Kurt Metzger?

  And nobody believes you when you say you love.

• 2:11:43Kurt Metzger?

  Yo, dude, like-

• 2:11:44Duncan Trussell?

  It's crazy, Tom Cruise is an adrenochrome dealer, according to this dude?

• 2:11:49Speaker 07

  Yeah, and he said that, yeah, I mean, I have more.

• 2:11:53Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, do, do, yeah-

• 2:11:54Duncan Trussell?

  Keep going.

• 2:11:54Kurt Metzger?

  Yes, please do.

• 2:11:56Speaker 07

  He told me that, uh, Jack White of the White Stripes, he didn't, he wasn't in that base, but he'd been to underground bases, and the song Little Ghost was about the children, because they look like pale white ghosts, because they're in these underground, in cages their whole lives, and he said, uh, because of my condition, that's if he stops doing it, he'll die, because your body no longer produces stem cells.

• 2:12:18Duncan Trussell?

  Can we pull up the lyrics to Little Ghost?

• 2:12:20Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, it doesn't produce, that's, sounds like your DNA is stagnant.

• 2:12:24Speaker 07

  Well, it, it's, it's almost like doing steroids, you stop producing testosterone, it's the same thing with the, you know, the chrome.

• 2:12:31Kurt Metzger?

  Dude, that sounds like a country song. Wait, she goes, Satan has told me, how did you, the way he said it, we, I have to make it a song. Alright, go ahead. Little ghost, I'm scared of the most. Can you scare me up a little bit of love? I'm the only one to see-

• 2:12:45Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, love drugs, yeah.

• 2:12:46Kurt Metzger?

  It's not yet. Every morning I awoke and see my little ghost, wonder if it's really her that's lying there. Need to touch her. Little ghost, I'm scared of them. Okay, wait.

• 2:12:53Duncan Trussell?

  He's blah blah blah, though.

• 2:12:54Kurt Metzger?

  So I try my best to keep it, there really was no secret. It must have looked like I was dancing with the wall. No one can see this apparition, but because of my condition, I found love with a little ghost. Speaking of little ghosts, have you ever heard it called White Rabbit?

• 2:13:08Duncan Trussell?

  Yes, I have, but just over the internet. I don't remember him saying that.

• 2:13:12Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, well, supposedly the molecule looks like a rabbit. But, yeah, and dude, on an episode that we did or will do to keep this bit going, remember I showed you that's a native Iroquois nation? They ate a guy alive. It's martial cannibalism. So that's why Canada developed, uh, the chrome.

• 2:13:29Duncan Trussell?

  Oh my god, pull up, uh, what's that song, White Rabbit? Holy shit, that, that-

• 2:13:35Kurt Metzger?

  What song, White Rabbit?

• 2:13:37Duncan Trussell?

  If you go chasing rabbits. White Rabbit, the Jefferson Airplane song. One pill makes you larger. Um, they play it in every sixties movie. But that's creepy if they're singing about a train of chrome.

• 2:13:54Kurt Metzger?

  So Allison, so Daryl, I know, uh, he, don't even forgot this, but wanted to bring it up because, did you ever read the book by, uh, Bob Barr's father? Called Space Relations and it's about sex slavery in space? Uh, and it, and that Dalton School Epstein went to? The guy, by the way, the guy's a CIA recruiter who wrote, I gotta start reading more CIA science fiction because I bet they put all kinds of shit in it. So this guy Donald Barr, his-

• 2:14:20Duncan Trussell?

  Can you go back to the Wikipedia of space relations? We can read it to him a little bit. Read him the plot, just to see if there's-

• 2:14:25Kurt Metzger?

  No, in the future, listen, yeah, seriously. In the future, humans have formed an intergalactic empire ruled by aristocrats. During a time of war with the Plith, an empire of ant-like bug people. Ambassador John Craig, formerly a liberal earthman in his thirties, this is already not good. Is dispatched to the strategically important planet of Kosar. I hope it's not Bernie Kosar because he sucked. A human colony that was settled by the Carlisle Society. Okay, I forgot that part. As a place of exile for political extremists and is now ruled by an oligarchical high council of seven nobles, each of whom is in charge of a different domain

• 2:15:05Kurt Metzger?

  with its own traditions. Their boredom and absolute power have driven them to madness. Does it sound like Donald Marshall now? To the point that Co-Sars entry into the empire has been stymied by the man inhabited planet treaty clause written by Craig against alliances with slave owning society due to its practice of kidnapping humans become illegal playthings of the galaxy's super rich. It's actually hard to read the book. I read it, but it's so, and this was written, when was this written? It's 1973. And it's under glass at the Dalton School when Jason Giorgiani went there. Like a pressure now.

• 2:15:43Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, hold on. Let's see. Craig spends two years as a slave of the beautiful sensual and sadistic Lady Morgan Sidney, the only female member of the oligarchy with whom he became romantically involved to get. So this, you know, I mean, it's obviously it's not your story.

• 2:15:59Kurt Metzger?

  The book's about a guy that gets enslaved and bred by these old, there's some theme I'm picking up every single time with this shit, which is whether it's you got pulled out of your bed so they could, hey, maybe it fuels their ships, the semen. I don't know.

• 2:16:11Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, did you hear anything about Bill Barr's dad?

• 2:16:15Kurt Metzger?

  Well, no, I don't think so. But I just want you to notice the book that this guy wrote, if you ever saw Burn After Reading, which is about that, a CIA guy's novel that gets stolen. It's got, dude, the guy that helped shoot Kennedy, that was friends with G. Gordon Liddy, he wrote spy fiction that was pretty popular. And I'll bet he, fiction is the quarantine zone where we can safely talk about med beds, right?

• 2:16:37Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:16:38Kurt Metzger?

  So all these spooks are all narcissists and they think their life's a movie and they want it, they want to put it out there in some form. They're all of them. If you read their fiction, I bet you pick up a lot of fucking shit.

• 2:16:49Duncan Trussell?

  In February 74, Mr. Barr announced that he was resigning his headmaster protesting the meddling by the Board of Trustees. He seems like he'd use the word meddling.

• 2:16:58Kurt Metzger?

  Could you stop teaching the kids your porno book you wrote, you piece of shit?

• 2:17:01Duncan Trussell?

  What the fuck? It is unclear whether Mr. Barr hired Mr. Epstein during that time. The similarities between the violent sexual depictions in space relations, Epstein's sex trafficking activities and obsessions, and the crimes of his associate, Ghislaine Maxwell, have led, all led to increased public scrutiny about Epstein.

• 2:17:19Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, I'm gonna cut you off there. It's not unclear. It's very clear. They went to that camp, uh, not Mystic, the one that, uh, um, dude, that comic, Maria Bamford went to that Epstein camp in New York. If you're wondering why she's like that. Maria Bamford is hilarious. She's not doing a character. She's really how she is. And she went to that camp. I don't think, I don't know if it's a specific Epstein Lodge. She went there, dude. I'm not making that up. Okay, whatever. Oh, Interlochen. Yes, that's the camp. Okay, but, okay.

• 2:17:48Duncan Trussell?

  Where he attended summer camp as a teenager.

• 2:17:50Kurt Metzger?

  The, the book under glass thing is what I was trying to get at, Duncan. Because, did you know down by Cuba in Florida, um, like, uh, Papa Hemingway, and Colonel Sanders' daughter, and Jacques Cousteau's daughter, and Ghislaine. Uh, Dark Journalist calls it the hot zone. That's where they're all looking for Atlantis shit. And you know on the boat that Hemingway's brother was on, he had a Alice in Wonderland under glass. Looking Glass, that is Louis Carroll. You always hear the Alice in Wonderland, when you hear about a weird, like this story that, that Daryl's telling, if we were, let's say pretend we're real spies and we go, we're through the Looking Glass people. Do you hear that reference?

• 2:18:30Duncan Trussell?

  Sure.

• 2:18:31Kurt Metzger?

  Louis Carroll, big pet, by the way. Okay, and it's not unclear, that, it, it's like, still believe in Michael Jackson, you dumb shits. Oh, yeah, no, uh, yeah, I feel bad for guys that legitimately spooned with boys because of the liars about my, he just spooned with them.

• 2:18:46Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, right.

• 2:18:47Kurt Metzger?

  Those are the two sides of the argument.

• 2:18:48Duncan Trussell?

  Gandhi did the same thing. He's basically Gandhi.

• 2:18:51Kurt Metzger?

  And he held it in. But anyway, so do you, there, there's this slavery thing that's ubiquitous. And those reptilians, did you say that there's some AI involvement with that?

• 2:19:03Speaker 07

  Yeah, they have like a tech in them. It's like an AI consciousness and it's basically leading them and they have to follow it. They're slaves to it.

• 2:19:11Duncan Trussell?

  This is what John Lilly talked about, by the way, the creator of the flotation tank. He had these visions about this exact thing, like an AI coming to Earth. Way before even AI was here, he talked about this.

• 2:19:22Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so Daryl, do you know anything about John Lilly?

• 2:19:26Speaker 07

  No, no.

• 2:19:27Kurt Metzger?

  He's the, uh, what's that movie that's ba- William Hurt?

• 2:19:30Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, God. Oh, God. Altered States.

• 2:19:33Kurt Metzger?

  Jersey Altered States. It's about John Lilly's work.

• 2:19:35Duncan Trussell?

  William Hurt plays like the most obnoxious man on Earth, eating mushrooms.

• 2:19:39Kurt Metzger?

  Well, he's John Lilly. John Lilly's dad was a creep and John Lilly, and I encourage you to read J.R. Sweet's book Mormon Monarch, or if you don't want to buy the book, which you should, it's more detailed, go on his website, MormonMonarch.com.

• 2:19:51Duncan Trussell?

  I think John Lilly got bre- can you look up John Lilly breast implants?

• 2:19:54Kurt Metzger?

  I think he fucked dolphins. Let's get to the, let's not bury the lead. He's a dirty dolphin fucker.

• 2:19:59Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, so that's bad.

• 2:20:00Kurt Metzger?

  Who was involved specifically in MKUltra and J.R. Sweet, when his Mormon grandpa, yeah, this creep, when his Mormon grandpa took him to Disneyland, so he says the ride in the book.

• 2:20:10Duncan Trussell?

  Wait, look, look, look. Is that John Lilly? Wait.

• 2:20:12Kurt Metzger?

  Yes.

• 2:20:13Duncan Trussell?

  No way.

• 2:20:14Kurt Metzger?

  Yes. What do you mean, no way?

• 2:20:15Duncan Trussell?

  Are we looking at John Lilly's tits here?

• 2:20:17Kurt Metzger?

  He probably is a corpse he's fucking with. They're probably dolphin tits.

• 2:20:21Duncan Trussell?

  Can you enlarge that, please?

• 2:20:23Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, yeah, let's get to the point.

• 2:20:25Duncan Trussell?

  What that is, what is that for? I just need to know what that is.

• 2:20:27Kurt Metzger?

  I'm gonna tell you if you, right now.

• 2:20:28Duncan Trussell?

  Okay.

• 2:20:29Kurt Metzger?

  When J.R. Sweet would go on the Disney ride where they divert the kids to get MKUltra, John Lilly would appear on the screen, maybe with this very picture, much like the Willy Wonka movie, and he'd go, "You are about to embark on a journey." You gotta read this guy's thing, it's so creepy. And I know Disneyland did that because Colonel McGregor, you might have seen him on a lot of news shows, he says it. Jimmy Dore didn't believe me until he saw Colonel McGregor talking about it. Because, of course, the CIA is involved in that fucking shit. All your favorites are CIA. Look at this creep. Look, he's got fucking, some about them glasses, dude. I don't know why they are all p- with them glasses, but there's a frame. There's an 80's pedo frame.

• 2:21:08Duncan Trussell?

  Uh, the dolphin he fucked was of age.

• 2:21:12Kurt Metzger?

  And they, okay, that's fair, and I apologize for yelling. I'm not against adult dolphins and, okay, I'm really, I'm really into Greek wisdom. So this fucker John Lilly died addicted to ketamine. When I first heard the wild stories about him, I'd look it up to see what other people said. And some guy goes, yeah, he had these crazy stories and he was always on ketamine. Now, who else is on ketamine all the time? Oh, Kanye West, MK Monarch victim. Who else, ketamine's a dissociative, you leave your body. The government has experimented with these, if you listen to Daryl's thing about Michael Aquino. Oh, or any UFO shit, Lazar, Linda Moulton Howe.

• 2:21:49Duncan Trussell?

  Have you ever taken it?

• 2:21:50Kurt Metzger?

  What?

• 2:21:50Duncan Trussell?

  Ketamine.

• 2:21:51Kurt Metzger?

  Of course, what am I, a fucking ver-

• 2:21:53Duncan Trussell?

  I don't know.

• 2:21:54Kurt Metzger?

  I just said I'm only a front virgin, not everything virgin.

• 2:21:57Duncan Trussell?

  Oh.

• 2:21:58Kurt Metzger?

  Ketamine, tunnels of type, okay. Anyway, John Lilly's a piece of shit that helped do this programming on people in Disneyland. If you listen to Daryl's story, now, I don't really care if he really went to the moon or not. If I have the ability to, to put the memory in your head like that, it's the same fucking thing. And the thing that I'm not gonna be able to figure out from this, but I, I want to eventually figure out. These underground bases are real, they're part of continuity government, which we covered in last episode. If Walt Disney's involved and he's an occultist and C V Wood, the guy, you made a funny joke about what it's like at Disney. C V Wood, the occultist, who also designed Lake Havasu, by the way, designed that. It's designed to trap the minds of children, it's designed for that.

• 2:22:41Kurt Metzger?

  So underground, no supervision, what do you fucking think, what kind of amusement park could they make? Remember how Alf, the show Alf, the puppeteer, they had to dig, have trenches in the stage? Cause the audience wasn't allowed to see the, the guy working the puppet? Which was ridiculous, cause, you know, it's so easy to act with a puppet. But this guy was obsessed that they had to think Alf was real.

• 2:23:02Duncan Trussell?

  Oh yeah, that's the most, wait, real quick, Daryl. Yeah.

• 2:23:06Kurt Metzger?

  Daryl died while I was talking.

• 2:23:08Duncan Trussell?

  Daryl. Daryl, what do you think about this? Cause Metzger is presenting like something maybe even more sinister.

• 2:23:17Kurt Metzger?

  Have you ever had to talk less in an interview than me?

• 2:23:19Duncan Trussell?

  Metzger, for real, Daryl, for real. Do you ever think, do you ever think, like, what he's saying is like, maybe none of this was real, but it was real in the sense that you were on a soundstage designed to look like the moon.

• 2:23:36Speaker 07

  I've thought of that, but just because of all the people I ran into, like in the underground, I mean, on the base itself, one time a guy only had like a day left in the command and he called me over to his room in the barracks and he sat me down and he said, you joined something called the secret space program, don't you remember that? And I said, no. And he said, Michael Aquino tortured you for two days and all these people that act like they're your friend, they know it and they don't tell you. Doesn't that piss you off? And so I have all these other, just from events, just being on the base itself.

• 2:24:04Duncan Trussell?

  I mean, that does in irrelevant ties, Metzger's like.

• 2:24:08Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I don't know. Look, because.

• 2:24:10Duncan Trussell?

  Truman Show shit.

• 2:24:11Kurt Metzger?

  This is why I'm saying this, because Kathy O'Brien, who was an MK Monarch, she kept saying NASA, oh, outer space, they're into inner space. And so I'm going to relate this to a cuckoo dream that I had, okay, which, which, um, you know, the ones that you remember forever, kind of weirdo dreams?

• 2:24:27Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:24:28Kurt Metzger?

  But this one sticks with me and, and I think it's like a lot, I don't think it's like a memory of going somewhere, but waiting outside my house, there's like this guy in black and a big limo and he goes, uh, the old, he said, the old man, he called it, the old man invites you to contemplate either the universe or the galaxy, I don't remember which. So I go in the, in the limo and there's a fucking, okay, I don't know if an ant or a mantid or a fly, it was like shifting, okay, it's a guy, it's in a suit. Okay. And it's an insect head, but it is kind of, but it's also like more than that. I don't know how else to describe it. That's the old man. And he goes like this, he goes.

• 2:25:11Kurt Metzger?

  Like, it was like a popping sound and I was inside of his head and it was space. And I was supposed to do it too, okay? I'm like, alright, I'll try it. And I go, it was almost, it's not like holding your breath, but the closest thing, is that right? I go like this, I hear like a pop? And we were surrounded by fucking space, okay? Then I blackout. In the stream, I never blacked out in a dream. Then, when I come to, I'm at a thing that looks like a fucking dojo dude, okay? And I'm, I, I, I know as a teenager, I don't know how old, it had to be pubescent because of the Samurai location. Bunch of kids, or guy, like people my age, boys, were all on our knees on like this step, in like a long row.

• 2:25:57Kurt Metzger?

  And there's a, like a satin pillow in front of each of us, okay? And we're all just sitting there staring ahead and I, and I, but I look over the side, I'm like, oh, am I not supposed to be awake? Like, I'm the only one awake. There's the guy in the suit again.

• 2:26:09Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:26:09Kurt Metzger?

  And the first thing, I'm like, the old man tricked me, I don't know why I thought. And then, okay, with, with the guy in the suit, the like man in black looking fed, there's a fucking dwarf in a karate gi, okay? Okay, they're walking up, up the pagoda thing, and they go up to each, each teen boy, and the, and the, we're just standing there like nothing. And the fucking dwarf wrings their neck and they fall and their head hits the pillow. I'm like, what the fuck are they doing here? Like, this is a very detailed dream, it's why I never forgot it.

• 2:26:38Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:26:39Kurt Metzger?

  So they're walking towards, and, and then the dwarf gets to me, I'm like, well, fuck that shit, I'm not doing it. The dwarf gets to me, I grabbed him, I started wringing his neck. By the way, I don't know where the man in black went, that's why I don't think it's a memory, but a dream. So I'm wringing his neck, okay, and he goes, "Homo killas will take care of you." And then the next, it cut to, I'm in some kind of facility, running, and I'm running away from this kind of beast. I know it's there, like I could, you know in a dream you can see three all around?

• 2:27:07Duncan Trussell?

  Sure.

• 2:27:08Kurt Metzger?

  I'm running through all these things and there's this huge thing that later, when I look at that William Blake, uh, Bamoff.

• 2:27:16Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:27:16Kurt Metzger?

  It was that. Later I saw that. I think it's a psychological thing, but it's so fucking weird and haunting. And I don't know what the fuck it is, cause I think like, okay, there's some, I can see the psychology of it, but then I'm like, maybe it's not either or.

• 2:27:30Duncan Trussell?

  Daryl, what do you think? Uh, is it possible?

• 2:27:32Kurt Metzger?

  Cause you know the old man.

• 2:27:34Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, well, it's possible. I mean, there's some possibility that Kurt was also in this program and just didn't.

• 2:27:39Kurt Metzger?

  No, we were both in gate. Don't, are you forgetting things?

• 2:27:42Duncan Trussell?

  I'm, I'm just, I don't think I went to the moon and banged and got banged down.

• 2:27:48Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I don't remember anything and it sounds like we all got roofied.

• 2:27:49Duncan Trussell?

  That's wait, Daryl, what, Daryl, what do you think? Do you think it's possible Kurt and I have also been in this program, but we don't have any of our memories?

• 2:27:57Speaker 07

  Of, of course. And I remember when I joined the program, the petty officer of the watch who first interviewed me, he asked me, he said, were you homeschooled? And I said, no. And he goes, well, I guess you just slipped through the cracks. So it seems like they try to pick up people when they're kids.

• 2:28:10Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, I was home college.

• 2:28:11Speaker 07

  And even the XO, my XO Robert will be there. Yeah.

• 2:28:13Kurt Metzger?

  I'm still be so, no, dude, that was the finder, dude. It's not, my friend Brooke that was in gate in college, Texas. They took all the kids in a darkened room and made them get in a hot air balloon basket. And there's a big screen and she goes, and then we were like floating over Italy. That's all she remembers. So when she told me that, I was like, what? I don't even know what to make of that. Now I do. I think it's some remote viewing thing. And Nicholas, that German guy that I, I talked to Dale on the phone about. What, I'm just looking for commonalities, right? And if, if you know about the astral, you know, Dale just explained that like fourth. That's in a lot of occult traditions.

• 2:28:48Duncan Trussell?

  I'll tell you my dream. This is why your story freaks me out though. I don't think I was, uh, smart enough to get into any of these programs. I don't think I was smart enough.

• 2:28:55Kurt Metzger?

  Did you fuck at least?

• 2:28:56Duncan Trussell?

  I wasn't smart enough to lay pipe on the moon, but I did have a dream that I remember just like that.

• 2:29:02Kurt Metzger?

  What?

• 2:29:03Duncan Trussell?

  I woke up.

• 2:29:04Kurt Metzger?

  Okay.

• 2:29:04Duncan Trussell?

  I was in some kind of station, stasis chamber. I knew I wasn't supposed to be awake.

• 2:29:10Kurt Metzger?

  Hmm.

• 2:29:11Duncan Trussell?

  I look out the window, it's deep space. Somehow I just know you're not supposed to be awake right now. Like you're not, and then s- a sound.

• 2:29:19Kurt Metzger?

  Wait, how old are you in this dream?

• 2:29:20Duncan Trussell?

  What?

• 2:29:21Kurt Metzger?

  How old are you and when did this happen?

• 2:29:22Duncan Trussell?

  When did I dream this?

• 2:29:23Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah.

• 2:29:24Duncan Trussell?

  This was when I was like very addicted to ketamine. I was having dreams like this. And I woke up in this weird chamber. It was on a ship and then I just.

• 2:29:32Kurt Metzger?

  How much ketamine?

• 2:29:33Duncan Trussell?

  How much ketamine was I doing? Oh my God.

• 2:29:37Kurt Metzger?

  I'm just asking just to understand.

• 2:29:38Duncan Trussell?

  Like, what do you mean?

• 2:29:39Kurt Metzger?

  So, Ari was on Salvia and lived a 20-year marriage. Um, Daryl may or may not have had a 20-year space program. These drugs do this to you. Inner space is a thing. I don't know that it's an either-or.

• 2:29:52Duncan Trussell?

  This wasn't a ketamine experience. This was like a dream in the midst of like doing ketamine for like two years straight.

• 2:29:59Kurt Metzger?

  Yep, I'm saying that you do so much that it pops you. Is it dissociative? So it's, it's like the.

• 2:30:04Duncan Trussell?

  Oh yeah, you would go on the mothership. You would see the same, yeah. Lots of people on ketamine had that experience. You go on the mothership. Field of flowers.

• 2:30:13Kurt Metzger?

  I didn't know you were Nation of Islam. Okay.

• 2:30:16Duncan Trussell?

  Why? How did you not know that?

• 2:30:18Kurt Metzger?

  Daryl, can I, I can't.

• 2:30:19Duncan Trussell?

  You've seen my tramp stamp.

• 2:30:21Kurt Metzger?

  I cannot apologize enough to Daryl and the viewers for the.

• 2:30:23Duncan Trussell?

  Daryl, Daryl, this is a horrible interview. Both of us deserve.

• 2:30:26Speaker 07

  Wow, it's wonderful. Great. You're doing a good job.

• 2:30:29Kurt Metzger?

  Well, you didn't see what we did to Tanner's friend, uh, Buster here. But it's, look, okay, wait, so.

• 2:30:37Kurt Metzger?

  The thing is, there's a.

• 2:30:37Duncan Trussell?

  Daryl, I'm really impressed with you, man. I think that your patience really is a testament to, to you as a person. Because I would have faked like.

• 2:30:47Kurt Metzger?

  Is it better or worse that being disemboweled than playing guitar naked for a lizard? For, okay, wait, so, so the type, so, uh, uh, go through the celebrities because that's the thing we're gonna get comments of interrupting you while you're.

• 2:31:00Duncan Trussell?

  For sure. That's the only comment we're gonna get about interrupting.

• 2:31:03Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, and I'm gonna make a Moon TMZ intro that's gonna be hysterical to go into it, but. Uh, the first celebrity, so is Tom Cruise, which was very interesting.

• 2:31:12Duncan Trussell?

  Chrome dealer.

• 2:31:13Kurt Metzger?

  The Chrome dealer. Jack White. Okay, what else?

• 2:31:17Speaker 07

  Uh, Tom Hanks, he told me was like the kingpin and that whole thing where him and his wife were in Australia.

• 2:31:23Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, or Greece.

• 2:31:24Speaker 07

  And they said they had the, the flu. They were actually executed there.

• 2:31:28Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, the, okay, so I've heard this that a lot of people have been executed and there's clones. I mean, what, what would be the point of that? Like, is my question of, of cloning them? I have no doubt Tom Hanks, by the way, is the.

• 2:31:40Duncan Trussell?

  Toy Story 5. Think of what he wants for that. You gotta fucking, you're gonna have to pay him so much money.

• 2:31:47Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, I don't wanna hear your Oliver Tree conspiracies right now. I wanna talk, oh my god, dude. Oh, wait, wait, so, okay, so they say he's replaced with a clone, but why would they do that?

• 2:31:57Speaker 07

  Well, he, he said that it's not only like that people have to be taught a lesson. He, he said that the way our DNA works is we have DNA memory, but it's only like traumatic events that like change our DNA.

• 2:32:08Kurt Metzger?

  Epigenetics, yes.

• 2:32:10Speaker 07

  Yeah, we actually have memory of like the plague. We're gonna keep this memory of the whole coronavirus, you know, getting locked down and all that stuff. We're gonna keep that. And, yeah, he, he said that basically the way he brought it up was it's like two chess masters and like the winner knows he's gonna win in four moves. And then the loser knows he's gonna lose in four moves, but the loser won't succeed. Like he won't give up. He won't just give up the game. So they're taking pawns, the whole thing with the fires in Australia that caused the koala bears to be like an endangered species and stuff where a third of Australia was burning down. He told me that. I brought that up a while back. And yeah, it's just them. They don't wanna give up. They don't wanna lose. Like they're scared and they don't wanna lose. So.

• 2:32:50Kurt Metzger?

  You hear the chess thing he said?

• 2:32:51Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:32:52Kurt Metzger?

  So that's the Masonic, the Masonic chessboard and the lie of QAnon. So the great L. Ron Hubbard said, there's the players. First, there's the pieces that don't know that the pieces on the board.

• 2:33:02Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:33:03Kurt Metzger?

  There's the players. So that's like the kind of higher up than you.

• 2:33:06Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:33:07Kurt Metzger?

  And the game master doesn't have to obey the rules. That's L. Ron Hubbard.

• 2:33:11Duncan Trussell?

  You sound like Peter Thiel when we're playing D and D.

• 2:33:14Kurt Metzger?

  I sound like a, a paper.

• 2:33:15Duncan Trussell?

  It's the same shit.

• 2:33:17Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I mean, if you would play the game according to the rules, maybe he wouldn't have to correct you and everyone have a good time, Duncan.

• 2:33:21Duncan Trussell?

  I do play according to the rules.

• 2:33:23Kurt Metzger?

  Peter Thiel's been very good to you. I know you don't remember because you signed that thing, but I wanna tell you something.

• 2:33:27Duncan Trussell?

  I don't remember signing anything.

• 2:33:28Kurt Metzger?

  We have a wonderful time in that island and, and you embarrass yourself so badly with your behavior that you ask him to erase your memory. And, and I don't even wanna tell you how he erases it, but it's, it's the moon, but it ain't the one Daryl's talking about. Okay, sorry. Fucking, we're very stupid here.

• 2:33:45Duncan Trussell?

  Fucking stupid.

• 2:33:46Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, wait, okay. But do, do you know how interesting this is?

• 2:33:49Duncan Trussell?

  You're saying he face sat me, so I got amnesia?

• 2:33:52Kurt Metzger?

  The what, what Daryl's describing the chessboard? And Daryl, look up Tracy Twyman because when she was doing fucking Ouija board shit, oh, when she's doing Ouija board shit and she's talking to Kane, the black sun inside the earth. And he's trapped like General Zod in a 2D planer prison. His core self, all his choices in life, trapped in a 2D planer prison. So he's like, he's in a coma. He's a, and he goes, don't, do not think I am alive. I'm not alive was the message she was getting? Like a being in a coma, cuz his course, that's why I say they're undead. Their core selves choices are done, they're stagnant now. Why are all these stories about, we need to breed with you cuz we fucked up? Why? Because I think they all were people.

• 2:34:35Kurt Metzger?

  Even though they're saying you're snails, the lizards, I, I think that's their etheric bodies or their like dinoide personality, you know, you got, you, did they tell you about having a subtle body? Cuz you said you went through some kind of a transport where you saw like fleshy spiders, which that really stuck with me?

• 2:34:56Speaker 07

  Oh, no, it was, there was like, we were on a ship and it was approaching the speed of light and there's like this shield on the ship where it, once you start approaching the speed of light, you kind of a, enter like, almost like the spirit realm. And yeah, and there were, and this shield went down and they're like, these fleshy spiders were telling you things that you wanted to know and I remember a

• 2:35:16Kurt Metzger?

  What did they look like? What do you mean fleshy spider? What does that look like?

• 2:35:20Speaker 07

  It was almost like, remember like that movie they, with the thing?

• 2:35:24Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah. Oh, you mean it look, ew.

• 2:35:28Duncan Trussell?

  Poppy.

• 2:35:28Kurt Metzger?

  But was there a face?

• 2:35:30Speaker 07

  Like face, yeah, like a human like face on like a spider body, yeah.

• 2:35:34Kurt Metzger?

  And, and what was it saying to you?

• 2:35:36Speaker 07

  It was saying things like, I can tell you why you joined the program, or I can tell you why you're, like, I wanted to know, like, why am I here? How did I get here? And it was like telling me things that, like, I really wanted to know.

• 2:35:46Duncan Trussell?

  God damn.

• 2:35:47Kurt Metzger?

  Did you ever see Duncan's cartoon, what was it called on Netflix? Because remember with all that wacky shit you had in that, that's what I think of, what I thought of when I heard him telling us about this, but like, I could tell you why you did this. Like a cutscene in your cartoon?

• 2:36:01Kurt Metzger?

  Um, and why did you see it? Like, what were they putting you through that you saw that?

• 2:36:06Speaker 07

  No, it was just that the ship was approaching the speed of light and once

• 2:36:09Kurt Metzger?

  Oh, so you just start seeing shit?

• 2:36:12Speaker 07

  Yeah, like, there's like a, there's a shield over the ship and the shield went down and we just started seeing like all these astral beings like appear on the ship.

• 2:36:19Kurt Metzger?

  Every astronaut says they see dead, you know, all these astronaut stories where they this hallucination, of course, right? But they see dead loved ones.

• 2:36:27Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah. Wow.

• 2:36:30Kurt Metzger?

  Mm-hmm.

• 2:36:30Duncan Trussell?

  Daryl.

• 2:36:31Speaker 07

  And it's everything you want to know, yeah.

• 2:36:32Kurt Metzger?

  Alright, so look, we burned up.

• 2:36:34Duncan Trussell?

  We gotta wrap it up, man.

• 2:36:35Kurt Metzger?

  Well, we'll just.

• 2:36:36Speaker 07

  That's great.

• 2:36:36Kurt Metzger?

  Yo dude, but I'm telling you, it's like, look, people have interviewed Daryl better than, uh, we did.

• 2:36:42Duncan Trussell?

  I don't think so.

• 2:36:42Kurt Metzger?

  But this is, I feel like, no, but the thing is, so you can watch those, and I already did, it's just that I, I want to talk to him because of it, because it was like, look, let's just say, let's just say we're just having a good time playing a LARP. But the details in his story, do you hear how they trigger other trains of thought?

• 2:37:02Duncan Trussell?

  I love it.

• 2:37:03Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, yeah, like, I just want to hear something where I'm not like, I know you're lying to me, I'm bored already.

• 2:37:08Duncan Trussell?

  It'd be crazy to hear what he said if we let him talk longer.

• 2:37:16Speaker 07

  I can do another spell.

• 2:37:18Duncan Trussell?

  Great.

• 2:37:18Kurt Metzger?

  We're just gonna call you back, okay? Look, we were in a program.

• 2:37:22Duncan Trussell?

  He's gonna block your fucking number after this.

• 2:37:24Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, look, me and Duncan were in Gate, but we're like virgins still for some reason. We didn't fuck everything in the universe, Daryl. Sorry, if I wanted, if I wanted my veteran friend to think I'm cool.

• 2:37:38Duncan Trussell?

  Daryl, thank you so much for your, for your time. You're, it's really cool talking to you.

• 2:37:42Kurt Metzger?

  Yeah, these last two were fucking great, dude. They're good ones.

• 2:37:45Speaker 07

  Anytime, fucking.

• 2:37:46Duncan Trussell?

  Godspeed.

• 2:37:47Kurt Metzger?

  Alright, take care, brother.

• 2:37:49Speaker 07

  Thank you.

• 2:37:51Kurt Metzger?

  Um, well, hey, uh, that's a, look, I feel like I saw, well, I don't know, I, we, this is a four-klaw podcast again, and I'm not saying it's trauma because I was on the moon and it's all bringing, coming back to me.

• 2:38:04Duncan Trussell?

  You, listen.

• 2:38:05Kurt Metzger?

  I leave that to the people to say.

• 2:38:06Duncan Trussell?

  Leave it to the people and, I, maybe whether or not you got on the moon is a state of mind more than anything else. It's like.

• 2:38:14Kurt Metzger?

  Uh, that's what I learned in Tibetan Buddhism, and it's never been.

• 2:38:18Duncan Trussell?

  Thank you all so much for tuning in to another episode of The Mystery Boys.

• 2:38:22Kurt Metzger?

  And you're welcome.

• 2:38:23Duncan Trussell?

  And you're welcome. God bless you.

• 2:38:26Kurt Metzger?

  I'm Trevor Saint Karp. With me as always is Saint Crank.

• 2:38:31Duncan Trussell?

  Uh. Of the third veil.

• 2:38:32Kurt Metzger?

  McBlucifer, of the third veil.

• 2:38:35Duncan Trussell?

  And to, uh, finish things up, a little song.

• 2:38:38Kurt Metzger?

  No, no, wait, look, I don't want to be charged with anything. That's why we have to do.

• 2:38:43Duncan Trussell?

  You're not gonna get charged.

• 2:38:43Kurt Metzger?

  Well, in pornos, those girls that are like, I had a great time, they didn't, they were obviously assaulted.

• 2:38:47Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:38:48Kurt Metzger?

  But they're stunned, they're in shock.

• 2:38:50Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, he's fine.

• 2:38:51Kurt Metzger?

  I'm trying to explain the bit to Duncan. Okay, so, because people can have a bad taste in their mouth.

• 2:38:56Duncan Trussell?

  I got, I got.

• 2:38:57Kurt Metzger?

  I had to warn Dale about it, because I'm like, I don't know if he wants to be associated with what we just did.

• 2:39:01Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:39:03Kurt Metzger?

  And, I mean, you know, he's not a saint himself, he's on the moon fucking slaves. Am I bad for going to Asian massage parlors like right after this? After you heard that?

• 2:39:15Duncan Trussell?

  Hey, everybody, uh, yeah, well, I just want everybody to know, number one, I am an adult legally. I'm over 21 years of age, you can look up my records and everything. And I'm a, an adult. And I also want to say, I love the Mystery Voice Podcast so much. It's so fun hanging out with Duncan and Kurt, you learn so much.

• 2:39:39Kurt Metzger?

  You have to say the word consent, please.

• 2:39:40Duncan Trussell?

  And also, I considered everything that happened to me in the bathroom. What I can remember, and also what I did remember. Ha, you know, when I signed up for the Mystery Voice Patreon, and they put me in the sweepstakes, I sure didn't expect that that, that, that they meant, what they were gonna do to me, what they did to me. I thought it was some kind of...

• 2:40:02Kurt Metzger?

  No, no, it was good.

• 2:40:04Duncan Trussell?

  It was good.

• 2:40:05Kurt Metzger?

  Just cut the thing, here, I'll get the flag.

• 2:40:06Duncan Trussell?

  It was good what they did to me, everything they did to me was good. And I paid for it in Doge coin. In Chud coin and Doge, and, uh, and I'm... And free Chud the Builder, everybody, okay? I just want to say, God bless America, and, uh, please stop defacing the reflecting pool. Goodbye, everybody. Oh, God.

• 2:40:36Kurt Metzger?

  You gotta cut that, don't...

• 2:40:38Duncan Trussell?

  Please, I want to go home. I just want to go home now.

• 2:40:42Kurt Metzger?

  Look, look, look, look. You did good, you didn't reveal it, Eric Trump tried to bribe you.

• 2:40:47Duncan Trussell?

  I did a good part.

• 2:40:48Kurt Metzger?

  You did what we told you.

• 2:40:48Duncan Trussell?

  I did what you told me.

• 2:40:50Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, and you're doing great, and you know what? Every day you're working your debt off. Every day you get closer to working that debt off.

• 2:40:55Duncan Trussell?

  Just don't send me back to the world.

• 2:40:57Kurt Metzger?

  I love you, Buster, I love you. Listen.

• 2:41:00Duncan Trussell?

  You want me to play guitar now?

• 2:41:02Kurt Metzger?

  No, no, beautiful, I want you...

• 2:41:05Duncan Trussell?

  I can play guitar.

• 2:41:06Kurt Metzger?

  No, I just want to dance with you.

• 2:41:07Duncan Trussell?

  Can bring out the flute, man. Please, just let me play guitar!

• 2:41:12Kurt Metzger?

  Well, you'll be doing some flute playing, don't worry about that.

• 2:41:14Duncan Trussell?

  Oh no!

• 2:41:15Kurt Metzger?

  Um, listen, I- I'm so proud of you, I know. Look, look, I'm the only one that cares about you, you know that. Not your parents back in Kansas City, right?

• 2:41:25Duncan Trussell?

  How did you put sunscreen in my eyes?

• 2:41:28Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, okay, let's just-

• 2:41:30Duncan Trussell?

  Why'd you do that?

• 2:41:32Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, Buster, I love you, but you are talking crazy. No one did that.

• 2:41:36Duncan Trussell?

  I don't- I don't- okay.

• 2:41:37Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, look at you, look at yourself, sweetie, you sound crazy.

• 2:41:39Duncan Trussell?

  Must've been a dream. This is just a dream.

• 2:41:42Kurt Metzger?

  I mean, we can get you help if you want, but you-

• 2:41:44Duncan Trussell?

  I need help!

• 2:41:45Kurt Metzger?

  You do need help, and-

• 2:41:47Duncan Trussell?

  Please!

• 2:41:47Kurt Metzger?

  Look, we all care about you here at the show. We all care about you.

• 2:41:50Duncan Trussell?

  I can't feel my legs!

• 2:41:51Kurt Metzger?

  Well, that, look, I know, look, someone with your condition, they forget things.

• 2:41:57Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:41:58Kurt Metzger?

  They think things that happened that didn't happen. And no one's blaming you for that, of course that happened.

• 2:42:02Duncan Trussell?

  Right, right, right, God bless America!

• 2:42:04Kurt Metzger?

  That's right, and you know what, you're gonna be, just like we promised, you're gonna be president one day.

• 2:42:08Duncan Trussell?

  I'll be president!

• 2:42:10Kurt Metzger?

  We are going to match you up with the perfect gal.

• 2:42:12Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:42:13Kurt Metzger?

  A real trad. And when I mean trad, I mean she's got right-wing titties.

• 2:42:17Duncan Trussell?

  Beautiful titties!

• 2:42:18Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, you know, and I know Game of Thrones affected you, and they try to show these like flat-chested kind of things.

• 2:42:26Duncan Trussell?

  Something terrible's coming! Something terrible's coming, everybody, we can't say it on the show, this is the only way we can say it, you should be storing up water! Iodine!

• 2:42:36Kurt Metzger?

  Buster, Buster, Buster, come on, you're spinning.

• 2:42:38Duncan Trussell?

  Sorry, I'm sorry.

• 2:42:39Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, listen to me, you are going to be president of the United States.

• 2:42:42Duncan Trussell?

  Tell your loved ones you love them!

• 2:42:44Kurt Metzger?

  You are going to be married to a big-titted blonde.

• 2:42:46Duncan Trussell?

  Have you not looked at the sky, the sun is wrong!

• 2:42:49Kurt Metzger?

  Just-

• 2:42:49Duncan Trussell?

  The light is wrong!

• 2:42:51Kurt Metzger?

  Buster, I need you to focus.

• 2:42:51Duncan Trussell?

  Can you not see? Can you not see anything?

• 2:42:55Kurt Metzger?

  Do you, okay-

• 2:42:56Duncan Trussell?

  Let those who have ears know it, I'm sorry!

• 2:42:58Kurt Metzger?

  Buster! Now, I don't wanna call Hassan.

• 2:43:02Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, please, oh, please, oh, don't send me back to Hassan!

• 2:43:06Kurt Metzger?

  You wanna try on Mr. Hassan's collar?

• 2:43:07Duncan Trussell?

  No, don't send me back to Hassan, please!

• 2:43:09Kurt Metzger?

  Mr. Piker's special collar.

• 2:43:11Duncan Trussell?

  Oh, God, I'm sorry.

• 2:43:12Kurt Metzger?

  Well, I don't know what else to do with you, because I'm trying to talk to you, and you're, you're talking like you're-

• 2:43:15Duncan Trussell?

  If anyone knows my wife, tell her I love her!

• 2:43:19Kurt Metzger?

  You have never had a wife.

• 2:43:20Duncan Trussell?

  Julia!

• 2:43:21Kurt Metzger?

  You sound crazy, Buster. Listen, we all care about you.

• 2:43:26Duncan Trussell?

  My throat is clogged with jizz!

• 2:43:30Kurt Metzger?

  Buster. Okay, I, I, and I want to make this clear Buster, we staged, you're at an intervention, that's clear to you, right? You've been doing a lot of ketamine. Do you know what you said to me Buster? You said that you did so much ketamine that you, uh, saw astral beings. Do you remember that?

• 2:43:46Duncan Trussell?

  No, I don't remember that at all.

• 2:43:48Kurt Metzger?

  I know because you're on ketamine.

• 2:43:49Duncan Trussell?

  Right.

• 2:43:50Kurt Metzger?

  It's a dissociative.

• 2:43:51Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah.

• 2:43:52Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, so, whatever you remember, whatever picture's in your head. It's probably horse shit, honey. Listen, listen, you gotta focus on the future. We're gonna need a new president.

• 2:44:02Duncan Trussell?

  I can hear the homunculus coming.

• 2:44:04Kurt Metzger?

  Don't you want to be president, do you want to be a president or not?

• 2:44:05Duncan Trussell?

  I hear the homunculus coming.

• 2:44:07Kurt Metzger?

  That's called a presidential run.

• 2:44:10Duncan Trussell?

  Oh.

• 2:44:10Kurt Metzger?

  In 2028. The dark horse candidate Buster. Oh, look at his hot blonde big titted wife. He looks just like Erica Kirk and is also named Erica Kirk.

• 2:44:19Duncan Trussell?

  Oh yeah, I love Erica Kirk.

• 2:44:21Kurt Metzger?

  We give out a lot of Erica Kirks to people and it's never not worked out one time, well, one time, but the point is, it's gonna work out with you. And I want you to-

• 2:44:29Duncan Trussell?

  Tanner!

• 2:44:30Kurt Metzger?

  What?

• 2:44:31Duncan Trussell?

  Where's-

• 2:44:32Kurt Metzger?

  What? What did you ask me?

• 2:44:34Duncan Trussell?

  Nothing, nothing.

• 2:44:35Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, do you want to be the president still?

• 2:44:37Duncan Trussell?

  Yes, I do.

• 2:44:37Kurt Metzger?

  Yes, you do.

• 2:44:38Duncan Trussell?

  Anything you want, I'll say.

• 2:44:41Kurt Metzger?

  That's exactly what a president would say. You see Buster, you're getting better. Okay, now I want you, we're gonna do a nice sign off to the nice people. We're gonna cut all that silliness, cuz I don't want you to be embarrassed. You, you've seen Kanye, right? You've seen what he looks like.

• 2:44:55Duncan Trussell?

  Yeah, I don't want to be like Kanye.

• 2:44:57Kurt Metzger?

  Well, you hit the galaxy gas pretty hard and I had it, you don't remember this, but I talked you out of giving, getting metal teeth Buster.

• 2:45:03Duncan Trussell?

  Oh yeah, I just love whipped cream.

• 2:45:05Kurt Metzger?

  You were gonna try to be a Black and Decker Pecker wrecker like a hack joke.

• 2:45:09Duncan Trussell?

  Okay, I'll, I'll sign up, let's sign up, what do you want me to say?

• 2:45:12Kurt Metzger?

  You embarrassed me in front of my friend Daryl James, by the way, but I've, no, I forgave you already. You're, look, hey, look, we need each other Buster, and one day, you're gonna be the le, the, the most, what, the most powerful man in the world is the name. Is the name of the title you're gonna get.

• 2:45:28Duncan Trussell?

  Why does your breath smell like my ass?

• 2:45:32Kurt Metzger?

  I'm gonna turn that around you Buster, how do you know what your ass smells like?

• 2:45:36Duncan Trussell?

  I'm very flexible.

• 2:45:41Kurt Metzger?

  Okay, listen.

• 2:45:48Kurt Metzger?

  Just, I need you to say the word consent so we can go home.

• 2:45:51Duncan Trussell?

  Consent, granted.

• 2:45:53Kurt Metzger?

  Hey, another great... Hey! Now play the president music while he comes.

• 2:46:01Duncan Trussell?

  Goodbye, everybody, and don't forget to dream. And remember, it's a small, small world.

• 2:46:09Duncan Trussell?

  Anybody can be an astronaut except for women. Goodnight.

• 2:46:30Speaker 03

  Mystery boys are so killers for you. Betty Cool Rocky, they bring, go me engage. Spooky ghosts, mommy sex fighter, ooh. Frankenstein, I tackle you, baby.

• 2:46:52Speaker 05

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