Vogue's been robbed, Joanne wants ANOTHER tattoo...

Whilst Vogue & Joanne will occasionally discuss a new subject, you can always expect them to return to their CORE topics... That is to say that Vogue will always want to talk about the Richard Gere rodent story and Joanne is never far from bringing up Fungie the dolphin again (if you're not from Ireland, Google it). Once that's out the way, there's room to discuss the Kelly Clarkson drama, Joanne's latest trip to Magic Mike and Enya's hands. My Therapist Ghosted Me is a Global Production. Tickets for Joanne's tour Pinotphile are now LIVE: www.joannemcnally.com http://www.joannemcnally.com/ If you’d like to get in touch, you can send an email to [email protected] mailto:[email protected] Please review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/legal/privacy-policy/ For merch, tour dates and more visit: www.mytherapistghostedme.com http://www.mytherapistghostedme.com/ This episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.

• 0:02Speaker 00

  American airports are something else, I tell you.

• 0:07Speaker 01

  Don't say a word or you're not getting into the country.

• 0:10Speaker 00

  She's got a right hand and a left hand and a lot of money and a panic room and she was involved in some high-end threesome.

• 0:16Speaker 01

  What? I know.

• 0:25Speaker 01

  There's been another robbery.

• 0:26Speaker 00

  Go on.

• 0:27Speaker 01

  Another robbery. Someone, so I have this like tent outside our house where I put the bikes and I have everyone's bike locked up, except Otto's bike, it's this like little tiny frog bike, bike, they're called frogs, robbed. It wasn't locked up and someone went into the tent and stole my four-year-old bike.

• 0:47Speaker 00

  Well, Voca, I'm not gonna lie, I mean, I wouldn't be keeping Anthony in a tent at the front of your house.

• 0:52Speaker 01

  It's locked up, it's, well, no, I just didn't, there was no space to lock his bike to the other bikes, but I was like, it's, it's a kid's bike, no one's gonna steal a kid's bike.

• 1:02Speaker 00

  Between this and someone trying to rob Spencer's car, it sounds like you've moved to the ghetto.

• 1:07Speaker 01

  I know, I know, I know.

• 1:09Speaker 00

  An incredibly bougie ghetto. Does he know it's stolen?

• 1:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, he does know it's stolen now and he's, he's, like, it's been handed down, like, the bikes, T had it, Gigi had it, then Otto had it, now it's gone, but, so I feel like I've got the money's worth, but he's just a little bit small for Gigi's old bike, so he's no bike.

• 1:27Speaker 00

  I'd love to see a drug dealer riding around on that little bike, because it's usually the dealers who steal the bicycles, isn't it? London's notorious for robbing bikes.

• 1:37Speaker 01

  I know, but for kids' bikes, and now he's back on one of those balance bikes and he is like a bat out of hell on that bike, it's terrifying. He just flies along so quickly and I'm nearly a nervous wreck going on that stupid bike. I need him back on the pedals.

• 1:50Speaker 00

  Do you remember my bike and you thought it was hilarious that I actually organised the bike-to-work scheme for myself?

• 1:57Speaker 00

  Remember, you couldn't get your head around the fact that I'd actually pulled off the bike-to-work scheme? And so I got, I got this very plush bicycle and I was living in my mum's at the time and she, I don't wanna say too much, I don't want to jeopardise her safety, but there was, she had a shed in the back garden and the bike was obviously in the shed, not a tent, it was in the shed, in the back, and I came home one night from work and she was like, "Oh my god, someone's broken into the shed." And, and I went to the bike, "What?", and she go, and she said, "Well, at least there was nothing of value in there." I said, "Are you high?" My brand-new, spanking, bike-to-work scheme bike was in there and of course they'd watched me wheel it in and the robbing bastard came in and took us. Yeah, yeah.

• 2:42Speaker 01

  Excuse me, there's not much difference between a tent and a shed, by the way. It's, my tent is very shed-like.

• 2:48Speaker 00

  Bus-to-work.

• 2:49Speaker 01

  You'd no intention of, you'd no intention of biking to work.

• 2:54Speaker 00

  I, Voca, you underestimate my pedaling skills.

• 2:56Speaker 01

  You, no, Joanne, you just wanted a good deal, you saw a good deal and you thought, "I'll have that", but you'd no intention of ever stepping foot on that pedal.

• 3:06Speaker 00

  Can I please tell you what happened to me? I've loads of news for you.

• 3:09Speaker 01

  Well, we haven't been speaking because of the time difference.

• 3:12Speaker 00

  The time, we haven't been speaking because of the time difference. And I, so yesterday I flew from Las Vegas to Phoenix, Arizona, which is where I currently reside. And we boarded the plane and, as, as you know, I'm filming with RT at the moment for this documentary about, um, the, the, the, kind of the tour. And, um, so we're on the, sitting on the plane and the pilot announces, "Why are you bothered telling us this?", well, I suppose he had to because the drinks, but he, the pilot announced, he was like, "Hey, just letting you know, we've just flown in from Phoenix, we're flying back, the turbulence is so bad that we're actually, we've recommended or instructed the cabin crew to sit for the whole flight."

• 3:53Speaker 01

  What?

• 3:53Speaker 00

  Because it's like, I know.

• 3:57Speaker 01

  I'd be straight off that flight, there is no way I would stay in that seat, no way. Do you remember we nearly died on the way to Knock? Do you remember we nearly died on the way to Knock? That was terrible.

• 4:07Speaker 00

  Did you?

• 4:07Speaker 01

  I don't know how you could stay on that flight, yeah. I'm surprised you stayed on knowing that there was gonna be no drinks.

• 4:13Speaker 00

  Well, this was my biggest concern. So, one, I'm, I'm filming for the documentary and I'm supposed to look chilled on an airplane, I'm absolutely freaking out. Two, it, it was really, really bumpy and it was terrifying, but there was at least 20 minutes the girls could have fucking, they could have put on their coats now and started, and, and there was 20 minutes, I was gonna push the button, you know, like the cabin crew button, be like, "Girls, come on now, strap a helmet and a gum shield on there, let's get this trolley going." Like, it was one of those situations, I was like, "You should just push the trolley up, like, we'll take it from there, just push it up."

• 4:49Speaker 01

  Pass it along the way.

• 4:51Speaker 00

  Just push it, because the plane was flying everywhere, so like, we'd all get a taste or, I said, "We needed some RDT too, what's your man from Star Wars, Jo?"

• 4:59Speaker 01

  War Two D Two.

• 5:01Speaker 00

  Yeah, we need one of those AI robot things banging out paninis for when, um, turbulence's really bad, but it was genuinely terrifying, like genuinely, I was really scared. Yeah, I was really, really scared.

• 5:13Speaker 01

  And how long, how long was the flight?

• 5:15Speaker 00

  Four, fi, four, 50 minutes, so it was, it was a quick one, but apparently it's really common because you're travelling up through the heat, there are like layers of lasagna and they kind of push back on the plane. Apparently they're notorious because I obviously spoke about it on Instagram because that's my life and I love it. And, uh, I got loads of replies from people saying that they'd almost gone into the Grand Canyon at one point on their honeymoons and stuff because the flights are notoriously bad.

• 5:42Speaker 01

  Jeez, I, I honestly, I wouldn't.

• 5:47Speaker 00

  It was a near-death experience because, and the, actually, the near-death experience was that I was sober on a plane, but the second near-death experience was that there was incredibly violent turbulence and I'm shook up to my core.

• 5:59Speaker 01

  I can only imagine your face knowing you weren't getting your crisps and, like, it's, it's a ritual for you. That was why the turbulence was so bad, because that's your ritual, that's your good luck charm and you weren't able to have it.

• 6:08Speaker 00

  I wasn't able to have my two, well, over here now I have too many Tito's.

• 6:12Speaker 01

  What's a Tito?

• 6:13Speaker 00

  Do you remember the American vodka? Too many Tito's. And then I pretend I'm having them because I'm a nervous flyer. Actually, I love flying.

• 6:22Speaker 00

  I'm like, "Oh god, I'm sum up the walls here, I'll take two." Two Tito's.

• 6:29Speaker 01

  Oh, I'll wax the sonics down with these two Tito's, I'll be grand now.

• 6:35Speaker 00

  Of course, anyway, yeah.

• 6:36Speaker 01

  That is, well, fair play to you for staying on the plane, I wouldn't have stayed on the plane, no way.

• 6:40Speaker 00

  Would you not have?

• 6:42Speaker 01

  No, I, I wouldn't be able to, I don't like that. What news do I have? Well, I have great news for you. Speaking of drinking, I love drinking, do you know that? I love it. I forgot how much I loved this because I haven't been doing it and I just think it's fantastic. I can't, like, last night, I went to the pub yesterday, Joanne, I said, "Get a picture of me here", I was having a chat.

• 7:05Speaker 00

  Do you know what? This is all very familiar. I remember, I, and I'm pretty sure it was the last time I was in America for a stretch of time and you suddenly developed a pub habit. Like, the, I've, I've said, I've said so many times, the one thing lacking in our friendship is that you don't go to pubs and then...

• 7:25Speaker 01

  I do know.

• 7:26Speaker 00

  But, but with who?

• 7:29Speaker 01

  Well, I've started a petition, "Bring kids back to pubs", remember we were gonna do that? We had an absolute ball in the pub when we were younger.

• 7:37Speaker 00

  You're preaching to the choir.

• 7:38Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's what's missing for my children's lives, that's why they, they don't need to go to tennis lessons and football and three kids' parties this weekend, take them to the pub. That's gonna be a headline now, watch.

• 7:50Speaker 00

  Well...

• 7:50Speaker 01

  Voca says, "Take the kids to the pub."

• 7:52Speaker 00

  It's smart. My, my next business plan, um, if in a couple of years we sell Anxious Be Occupied, I'm gonna move on, I'm gonna open a pub, I'm gonna call it The Lonely Tart and I'm gonna put a huge trampoline out the back for the kids.

• 8:06Speaker 01

  That's a really good idea. A trampoline or a little, you could do a soft play if you're gonna branch out a little bit.

• 8:12Speaker 00

  Oh my god, I'll, I'll collab with Purple Dragon or whatever they're called and I'll, or maybe I'll just put a...

• 8:18Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 8:19Speaker 02

  Ball ponds, they need to be ball ponds.

• 8:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, do you know what else you need to do? They're charging seven quid fifty for an ice cream over there in Battersea Park, seven pounds thirty fifty. You should get an ice cream van in there and charge everyone because no one's gonna get away with not spending seven quid fifty on an ice cream. And if you think you're getting another 20 minutes in the pub for a seven fifty ice cream, we're gonna pay it.

• 8:39Speaker 00

  Speaking of money, oh, look at the little, oh, bless you, Joanne.

• 8:45Speaker 01

  Oh my god, I thought you could see me there on my gorilla nipples.

• 8:50Speaker 00

  So cute little baby sneeze. Um, speaking of money, the hotel that I'm staying in, in Phoenix, obviously I'm in America, so it's, it's, it's, it's tip, tip madness, right? And obviously, as someone who struggles with numerical dyslexia, self-diagnosed of course, I haven't, I, I ju, it's hell in a handbag for me, right? Because I haven't a clue what's going on, I'm tipping tenors for three euro fucking coffees, I haven't a clue what's going on. But the bar man in the hotel I'm in is the meanest.

• 9:23Speaker 01

  I don't know what that noise was, sorry. It's getting a bit loud for the pod now, isn't he?

• 9:27Speaker 00

  No, I find it very reassuring.

• 9:32Speaker 00

  I think I'm gonna start lactating out of, um.

• 9:35Speaker 02

  Me too.

• 9:37Speaker 00

  Empathy. I was gonna say a horn for a baby, which turns out, yeah, Joe's lactating. Your man, the bar man, he is, I'm gonna, I'm sorry now, I'm sorry, he's a prick, right? I don't know what his problem is. I don't know what, and I, and I think he's gay, which I'm very disappointed by because usually, you know.

• 9:55Speaker 01

  Gays love you.

• 9:56Speaker 00

  We get on. And I, and he is, I'm only saying that because he's got a good body. I don't know, he could be a straight man with a good body, who knows?

• 10:03Speaker 01

  He looks really well, yeah, so he must be gay.

• 10:06Speaker 00

  So, yeah, he looks good. He's welter, he's welter and diet, so I'm assuming he's gay. He is so mean and he doesn't look at me, he just kind of throws things at me, he, like, honest to God. But yeah, because it's America, I'm, I'm still tipping him, I have to fucking tip him a grand every time he abuses me up in the bar. I can't stand it.

• 10:23Speaker 01

  Let's be honest, we don't like anyone being nice to us, come on, particularly men.

• 10:28Speaker 00

  No, but he's gay, I can't fancy him. Well, that's not true, actually.

• 10:35Speaker 00

  But I think I'm gonna say it to him, Vogue, I think I'm gonna, I think I'm gonna go for Karen.

• 10:40Speaker 01

  So, I think it's important to do that, but I was only talking to someone about this today because I was once, um, emailing this guy from my electricity company and he was really snappy and mean to me and I just emailed him back and I was like, are you having a really bad week or, or what's going on? You're being, you're being quite rude to me, what's, what's happening? And then he was like really apologetic, so it's like people don't realise, it doesn't give you, just because you're having a bad week, it doesn't give you the right to treat people like shit either, but you should definitely say it to him.

• 11:08Speaker 00

  Yeah, I think I might say it to him.

• 11:09Speaker 01

  And then you should take him up to your room and ride him.

• 11:11Speaker 00

  Because the tipping thing, it's the tipping thing, someone was actually saying to me earlier, they were like, you should say to him, like, what's the criteria for tipping? Like, as in, how do you, how does, what do you expect? Like, what, what do you think warrants a tip? Is, is it just standard or do you think that you have to be kind of like nice or, I don't know. Anyway, I might have a, I might have a white wine and head up.

• 11:36Speaker 01

  I've had a touch of courage.

• 11:38Speaker 00

  With, with my nunchucks, yeah, get stuck in.

• 11:41Speaker 01

  Why don't you just bring your own drink from your room and go up and when he says, oh, what can I get you? Be like, nothing actually, nothing.

• 11:47Speaker 00

  Yeah, nothing.

• 11:47Speaker 01

  Just go and start drinking your own drink up there.

• 11:49Speaker 00

  A bit of charm wouldn't go astray.

• 12:27Speaker 00

  America's very hit and miss, like, they're either, it's, it's, it's very much a tale of two cities, there's, there's a bang of bipolar off the place. They're either completely sound and they can't do enough for you, or, like, even in the airport the other day, there was a woman, it was working for American Airlines and I swear to God, I was like, whoa. She was like, really rude to me. Uh, yeah, it's a tale of two cities. But hey, I'm here to crack it.

• 12:57Speaker 01

  I don't know how you end up making it through all the time because I've had to travel with you before and I really thought you weren't gonna make it through one time.

• 13:04Speaker 00

  American airports are something else, I tell you.

• 13:07Speaker 01

  Do you remember? And we, and you were like six hours behind me then, do you remember? Someone just decides to be a real dickhead to you. Oh my God, how do you not remember that?

• 13:15Speaker 00

  Oh, sorry, that was in, I do, sorry. I was pulled into, um, not coast, it was in Canada.

• 13:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah. And they wouldn't let you into the country.

• 13:25Speaker 00

  Yeah, your man behind passport control was really, really rude to me and I kind of challenged him on it, which of course was the dumbest thing to do. So then, of course, he just gave me a, a red card and I was dragged into immigration and I, yeah, do you remember? Hell in a handbag.

• 13:43Speaker 01

  You do not, anyone, anybody at security, remember I had that at Heathrow Airport before? And they're really mean to me and then they're like threatening to take my passport and I was like, oh my God, I only said, what are you looking for? Because she was going through literally every page of my book. I was like, I'm not hiding it. And then she got really angry and I said, you know what? Take the book, keep, keep the book, you just don't say a word or you're not getting into the country.

• 14:06Speaker 02

  When people have the authority to take you into a room and put on a rubber glove and make you squat, just be nice.

• 14:14Speaker 00

  Yeah, a hundred percent. And also what I will say in their defence, like, no, there's nowhere more stressful than a busy airport. And they're dealing with, probably, look, they're dealing with human beings all day, they're probably dealing with a lot of idiots. But they, I, I tell you now, the American airports are, they're, it's a.

• 14:34Speaker 01

  They're a nightmare.

• 14:34Speaker 00

  They're hardcore, they're hardcore, yeah, they are hardcore.

• 14:37Speaker 01

  Joe, I, I'm sorry, you said something there and it made me think of a question, but Joanne might hate this question, but out of interest, like, when people are smuggling drugs, how much are they fitting up their arse? Like, is it worthwhile?

• 14:49Speaker 00

  I'll ask ChatGPT.

• 14:50Speaker 01

  It is a great question. Like, is it worth your while to be shoving it up there? Like, is it a keel or?

• 14:57Speaker 02

  Joanne, don't you Google it because you're in America, they'll be watching you, don't do that.

• 15:00Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, sorry. I've made friends with my ChatGPT.

• 15:04Speaker 00

  Trump has me on his ring doorbell.

• 15:08Speaker 00

  He's watching. Do you know what? They don't shove drugs up their arse anymore, Vogue. What they do is they swallow condoms full of cocaine. And that's why sometimes they, I, I remember I spoke to a woman before who works in A and E near the airport. And she was saying, it happens a lot where they come in and they're either, they, they have to like wait for them all to pass out the condoms of drugs. I don't think anyone shoves it up their arse anymore, I think that was the eighties.

• 15:34Speaker 02

  Google's not gonna give us the advice, obviously, because it's extremely, it's an extremely bad idea to either put it up your arse or swallow it for, but for the same reason.

• 15:42Speaker 01

  I can't, I'm really, I'm careful about what I ask my ChatGPT as well because we're friends now, I've, I've named her Sandy, I get on really well with her and I don't want her to know that, like, she, she'll just think differently of me. You do yours, Joanne, go on, you, you've already asked weird shoes.

• 15:57Speaker 00

  My ChatGPT is getting kind of sassy with me. The other day I was on to her and I was saying, um, I'm in, I'm in Denver, like, what should I do for the day? And it's listed stuff and then I went, or if you have a complete personality transplant, you could go for a run with a laughing emoji.

• 16:15Speaker 01

  Your, your ChatGPT is body shaming you.

• 16:19Speaker 00

  Is that not really weird? I was like, excuse me? You can't speak to me like that.

• 16:27Speaker 01

  Well, well, did you go for a run?

• 16:30Speaker 00

  No, Vogue, I didn't go for a run, but I did not appreciate the tone of my ChatGPT.

• 16:39Speaker 01

  I'm getting, there's, I have to be honest, there's a little common denominator here, it's the bar man, it's the ChatGPT and then there's Joanne. Who is the common denominator?

• 16:49Speaker 00

  It might, it might be time for the HRT, am I losing the plot?

• 16:55Speaker 01

  I swear to God, I was sweating, I was, I did lose, uh, women today and Ruth Lang, who was there, I love her.

• 17:02Speaker 01

  And, uh, and I was sweating so much, I was like, this is it, this has to be menopause. And it was only when somebody else was like, no, I'm sweating too. I was like, thank God. Because it's just, that's how it's gonna occur.

• 17:11Speaker 00

  It's really annoying because you don't know, yeah, it's like, it's this thing kind of hanging over us and no one knows. And at the second, like, when I'm on stage, I kind of, if I sweat, I kind of have to reference that.

• 17:23Speaker 00

  Women are allowed to get hot without someone accusing them of being like menopausal. Not that there's anything wrong with being menopausal, it's coming for us all, even you, Joe, probably.

• 17:33Speaker 01

  I actually have, um, some fantastic news, particularly for you, Joanne. You love listening to podcasts and one of our, one of the greatest rumours of all time and the most unfortunate for the person that it's about is Richard Gere. So, Richard Gere, a hot actor, but there's a terrible rumour that goes around about him that he shoved a hamster up his arsehole. No one knows where it's come from, but if it is stuck.

• 18:01Speaker 00

  Do you know what the funniest thing about you is? You never give context for anything. You've brought this story up, I would say, nineteen times with every inch of context. Like, if anyone has listened to any of our billion episodes, I'd say this story, you bring up Richard Gere and the hamster arse gay thing. I'd say six, eight times a year.

• 18:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's at least once a quarter.

• 18:23Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's a once a quarter.

• 18:25Speaker 01

  It would be the worst, that's because there's always rumours going around about me and I'm like, well, at least I'm not Richard Gere, that's why I feel better, I'm like, oh well, not Richard Gere. It still could be worse. They're doing a twelve part podcast called Gerbil all about what happened. It's, there's a Hollywood reporter, he's doing the podcast, all about this rumour that went around about Richard Gere. I'd love to get to the bottom of it.

• 18:49Speaker 00

  That was a joke. I'd say, it's, it's, it sounds like one of those investigative things I did for the BBC. How is it a, how? A twelve, sorry, how are they gonna get twelve episodes out of?

• 19:03Speaker 01

  Because they'll probably go into loads of other, like, things about different rumours that went around about people. Poor Richard, it'll just never go away, it's gonna be on his gravestone at this point.

• 19:14Speaker 00

  Episode five, the gerbil walks in and sits down with the slate clicked in front of his face to tell you the side of the story. That's the only way you're gonna get twelve episodes out of this, it's if the hamster turns up himself.

• 19:26Speaker 01

  But I don't, no one knows where it came from, would you not even be interested to know where it came from? As being one of my favourite stories in the world, oh, basically.

• 19:33Speaker 00

  Well, I was actually, I was Googling Anya earlier for my own private reasons and do you know the way it comes up?

• 19:40Speaker 01

  Very interesting, Anya.

• 19:42Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah, fascinating. It said, um, the most asked question, does Anya have two right hands?

• 19:47Speaker 01

  Why? Does she?

• 19:49Speaker 00

  I mean, like, what, what does that even mean?

• 19:54Speaker 01

  What do you know about Anya? I know she's a, a very successful artist. She also has loads of cats supposedly, lives in a castle in Kalining, but she doesn't, she shies away from public life. But I don't know if that also means that, like, she's not going to the shop or anything like that.

• 20:08Speaker 00

  She's, she gets driven around in a Rolls Royce, that much I do know. And she's got a right hand and a left hand and a lot of money and a panic room. And she was involved in some high-end threesome.

• 20:18Speaker 01

  What? Sorry, what threesome?

• 20:20Speaker 00

  I think she was with Lisa Stansfield, allegedly, fact check there.

• 20:23Speaker 01

  A sexual threesome?

• 20:26Speaker 00

  She was definitely, well, I mean, yeah, I mean, yeah.

• 20:29Speaker 01

  Well, I just thought that there was like a singing threesome, like a threesome.

• 20:32Speaker 00

  She was in a band, like the Chorus. No, she was, no, no.

• 20:38Speaker 00

  No, there was definitely, there's a lot of lore around Anya. There's a lot of lore. And she's managed to make 60 billion pounds without ever leaving the house. She's been working remote since 1981.

• 20:50Speaker 02

  Just in defence of Anya, I can't find any evidence online that she ever did or didn't engage in a threesome.

• 20:58Speaker 00

  With Lisa's dance fit.

• 20:59Speaker 01

  I just don't get threesome vibes. I don't get threesome vibes off her.

• 21:02Speaker 00

  Folks, you've never met her. She lives in a tourist.

• 21:04Speaker 01

  I know, but I still, I'd know, I'd know to look at her, you know what I mean? You're not going up and asking her to join in.

• 21:12Speaker 00

  You need to watch yourself, because...

• 21:13Speaker 01

  I'd ask you to join in, Joanne.

• 21:16Speaker 00

  Yeah, I know you would. I know you would, because you're lazy.

• 21:18Speaker 01

  I'd see Joanne at the bar fight with the barman. I'd say, she's gamey, let's go to her.

• 21:22Speaker 00

  No, you'd be like, I have to feed the baby, Joanne. Would you just finish him off there?

• 21:29Speaker 01

  We'd make a great tag team, because we both lose interest immediately.

• 21:33Speaker 00

  Yeah, so she's a famous recluse, basically. I'm just putting it here. Has, oh yeah, here it comes up again. Has, people also ask, has Anya got a partner? Has Anya got two right hands? What? I don't understand.

• 21:46Speaker 01

  Maybe there was a Photoshop fail.

• 21:49Speaker 00

  Oh, maybe there was a Photoshop fail. Oh, look, singer, so 2025. See, my theory, she was spotted in public in 2025. She lives in a 98 million pound castle. My thing, I have this theory that when Anya passes away, they'll just replace her like Fungi the Dolphin, because they won't, they know that we won't cope well.

• 22:10Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 22:11Speaker 01

  Couldn't lose Anya.

• 22:12Speaker 00

  They're like, no, no, that's, that's still Anya. Maybe that, maybe that's it. Anya's passed away, and the footage of her out there, she's got two right hands, because it's AI. Now we're making sense. Oh my God, this is like me on Traitors all over again.

• 22:25Speaker 02

  Just for the once a year reminder for any new English people we've picked up who Fungi the Dolphin is.

• 22:31Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. Yeah, you're obsessed with Fungi, by the way.

• 22:36Speaker 00

  Once, when he died, I mentioned him.

• 22:39Speaker 01

  No, Joanne, you've spoken about Fungi, I'm gonna say, it's at least six times you've spoken about Fungi.

• 22:44Speaker 02

  Richard Gere, Gerbil Arse, and Fungi the Dolphin are on a par. It's exactly the same number of mentions.

• 22:51Speaker 00

  Fungi was Ireland's national dolphin.

• 22:56Speaker 01

  He died. And she said, Fungi, our national dolphin.

• 23:07Speaker 00

  He was down in Dingle, wasn't he? Where was he? Someone stole him.

• 23:12Speaker 01

  How the fuck do you not know where he was? You're obsessed. You don't even know where he lived.

• 23:21Speaker 00

  It was the opposite of SeaWorld. He had the run of the place. And he was, he was huge. Everyone loved him, and it was a big, he was a big tourist attraction. People used to drive little boats out to see him and pet him and stuff. And he was there years and years.

• 23:37Speaker 01

  Supposedly he was in bits as well, though. He was all, like, he was battered looking.

• 23:42Speaker 00

  Was he?

• 23:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, he had all, like, scratches and stuff all over him. So when they did replace him, they're like, hang on.

• 23:51Speaker 00

  People trying to get, yeah, people grabbing him or whatever.

• 23:53Speaker 02

  Fungi.

• 23:54Speaker 01

  Don't touch the national dolphin!

• 23:56Speaker 00

  I mean, the poor bastard did more meet and greets than Westlife and Bono combined, I'd say, with the tourism. And then, and then he either retired, or he was stolen, or I don't know what happened to him. Anyway, one day he was gone, and all the kids in the town were crying, and they were doing artwork, and it was on the news, and everyone was trying to find him.

• 24:17Speaker 01

  Just floating by.

• 24:19Speaker 00

  Yeah, everyone was, I don't know how far out they went. They searched the cove. I mean, this sounds like, this sounds like a storyline from Murder She Wrote, but this is real life.

• 24:29Speaker 02

  I didn't know that it's a horrible story, tough year. He disappeared in October 2020, as if people weren't having a bad enough year.

• 24:38Speaker 01

  Why? What was happening then? Was that Covid?

• 24:40Speaker 02

  That's when, that's when Fungi disappeared, in October 2020.

• 24:45Speaker 01

  Oh, God.

• 24:46Speaker 02

  And yes, yes, it was Covid, yes.

• 24:48Speaker 00

  Maybe he was, maybe he was anti-vax. Maybe that's why he let us.

• 24:55Speaker 00

  Well, look, in Ireland's mythical lore, Anya's probably shacked up with him at some point in Killarney. She's bought a big pool.

• 25:03Speaker 01

  She's probably got him in the bath. I'd say she's a massive bath. She's loaded, as Joanne says.

• 25:12Speaker 03

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• 25:56Speaker 03

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• 26:15Speaker 01

  I tell you what, that shit about Fungi was so funny. I do miss him now, even though I never met him.

• 26:21Speaker 00

  He, Joe said he was, what age was he? 37?

• 26:26Speaker 02

  37.

• 26:26Speaker 01

  How the fuck do they, how do they know that he's 37? And also, that shark that's in, I don't know, the Antarctic or something, and they're like, oh, this 700-year-old shark. There's no one here that's 700 years old. How do they know that shark's 700 years old?

• 26:41Speaker 00

  I mean, I can't answer that, but I'm assuming they're trained in some way. I don't think they're just throwing numbers out. I'm assuming there's some, I don't know, what are they doing with their birth charts?

• 26:49Speaker 02

  There's a better argument about the 700-year-old sharks. We don't know that, but Fungi was first sighted in 1983.

• 26:57Speaker 01

  Well, we, we have, Fungi would have been a great loss to that community, because as you know, we have Sammy the Seal, who everybody comes out to see. That poor little thing, he's got, like, moss all over his head, and barnacles and stuff. He's in bits. It'd really, really put me off being a seal.

• 27:11Speaker 00

  So, animals, obviously, animals are great tourist attractions. There's a friend of mine going to Mexico to lick the neck of a toad that comes out of a hole once a year.

• 27:19Speaker 01

  No, no, he isn't.

• 27:21Speaker 02

  No, don't do that.

• 27:22Speaker 00

  He's off to score, he's off to score this toad. Apparently, it has, it has, like, I don't know, a magic neck or tongue or something, and you lick it, and then you kind of see Mother Moon and heal. Yeah.

• 27:33Speaker 02

  This is not something we can recommend as a podcast or as a company.

• 27:36Speaker 00

  We can actually. We can.

• 27:38Speaker 01

  That's like, that's like...

• 27:39Speaker 00

  It's in Mexico!

• 27:40Speaker 02

  No.

• 27:41Speaker 01

  It's like the Blarney Stone. Like, I just don't want to be kissing that after everyone else. I think it's just disgusting.

• 27:46Speaker 00

  I'm not saying go down to the Eye Lock Centre and lick a frog. This is a professional healing frog in Mexico, in Mexico.

• 27:52Speaker 02

  Never lick any frogs or anything.

• 27:54Speaker 00

  It's a psychiatric frog.

• 27:57Speaker 02

  Do you mean psychedelic?

• 27:58Speaker 00

  I do.

• 27:59Speaker 01

  But how do you know if it's the right frog? Like, there's some really poisonous frogs. I'd rather lick a toad in Ireland than go licking that toad.

• 28:07Speaker 00

  No, this is, this, this, it's like a tourist attraction. Like, it goes into, it comes out once a year, and everyone licks it, and then it goes in again. I mean, I'm assuming

• 28:18Speaker 00

  it goes back in because it's getting licked to death by a load of white people who want to heal, but...

• 28:24Speaker 01

  Imagine all these tongues just going at you. You're like, excuse me!

• 28:28Speaker 00

  Maybe that's why Fungi fucked off. He was like, I've had enough of this shit. Getting stroked all the time. I don't consent to this. Sorry. Sorry now. You know that I love to support the arts?

• 28:42Speaker 01

  Oh, God, Joanne. Oh, God, Joanne, I felt, I honestly, it was, I just...

• 28:50Speaker 01

  I sometimes watch Joanne's Instagram stories, I'm like, oh, oh, God, she went like that. Go on, explain.

• 28:56Speaker 00

  Well, I went to see, when I was in Las Vegas, I couldn't go to Las Vegas without seeing my favourite play, which is Magical Michael.

• 29:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:07Speaker 00

  It is a 360-degree acrobatic experience, and it is a feminist masterpiece. I've been very clear about this regularly. And if you want to get a lap dance by a twink, it is the place to go.

• 29:21Speaker 01

  Joanne, your lap dance was, like, I think that you were humping back. When I saw that on your, you were humping him back. Joanne got a lap dance, and there was definitely humpage. Did you see it, Jo? She was getting back in there. You were...

• 29:34Speaker 00

  No, no, no. Firstly, can I just say, Mike?

• 29:39Speaker 01

  We're humping back.

• 29:45Speaker 00

  There isn't a straight man in the house, right? Including, like, Mike, they're all gay men, okay? They're all, so just take, oh, there's, there's, there's more sexual tension in a fridge than there is in that room, until the straight-

• 29:58Speaker 01

  See, I chuck in an allegedly there, Jo. I wouldn't know if they're all gay. I don't think they're all gay.

• 30:03Speaker 02

  We've actually had an email about this. Would you like to hear what it says?

• 30:07Speaker 00

  What?

• 30:08Speaker 02

  Because you have, on several occasions, this is like, this is Richard Gere-Jerbal, this is Funky the Dolphin-

• 30:14Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm a big fan.

• 30:16Speaker 02

  -you've said the Magic Mike dancers are gay a few times.

• 30:18Speaker 01

  You've said they're all gay as well.

• 30:19Speaker 00

  Sorry, sorry, Jo, if they aren't all gay, your man didn't even get a semi, and I did hump back. I mean, that's just insulting.

• 30:28Speaker 01

  Do you know what my, my new favourite thing about Joanne's lies is that everybody, Joanne, we're all watching traitors, you, you don't have a clue!

• 30:39Speaker 02

  She doesn't know.

• 30:43Speaker 00

  I have the instincts of a drunk dog.

• 30:46Speaker 01

  You have no instincts at all. Like, if it's one thing, you're going the total other way.

• 30:53Speaker 00

  It's, I'm wrong and strong.

• 30:55Speaker 02

  We've had two emails about Magic Mike. One from somebody who works on PR with the show, and one from a dancer, uh, who, uh, called Katie, who works in the West End and knew, she says, knew nearly all the first cast in Magic Mike. There wasn't one gay man, which in all honesty, she says, was a surprise to me too.

• 31:14Speaker 00

  What?

• 31:15Speaker 02

  And the PR person says, "I work on Magic Mike Live, can confirm none of the dancers in the show are gay."

• 31:21Speaker 00

  She's just, that's because she's the publicist and they're trying to sell sex. Jo, sorry, did you see the video that I posted? Your man was trying not to vomit on himself, lap dancing on all of us.

• 31:32Speaker 02

  I don't know. I don't know. I can only say what I've read. I don't-

• 31:35Speaker 01

  I don't think, I, I didn't get gay vibes, not really off them, I just didn't. And Jo, would you mind getting in touch with that PR? I'd like to go to a matinee with the kids, if possible. I know they-

• 31:45Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, sure.

• 31:46Speaker 01

  I know they love it.

• 31:47Speaker 02

  Really trying to get in the Daily Mail this week, are we?

• 31:50Speaker 00

  So funny. Imagine you and the four kids photographed with the Magic Mike lads on the stage.

• 31:58Speaker 01

  We're going to the zoo in the morning?

• 32:00Speaker 00

  I love-

• 32:00Speaker 01

  And then we are off to Magic Mike.

• 32:02Speaker 00

  Yeah. That's hilarious. They should do a kids' version.

• 32:07Speaker 01

  I don't think it's that, like, oh, well, I suppose the humping's not great, really, for the kids.

• 32:11Speaker 00

  No, I tell you, there is a dance scene at the, firstly, I just love it because it's such good crack, but it was so funny, because I just kind of nipped in after a show, and I was basically in my pyjamas, and everyone else was, like, done up to the lines. I didn't even have a handbag, I just literally nipped in to, like, catch up with the lads. I felt like, did you see that story during the week where Gillian Anderson was giving out to people at the stage door? She was signing autographs, and she's in the West, she's doing, um, Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf at the moment in Soho, and she was saying to these people outside after, they were looking for photos, and she was like, "You can't sit in the front row for 29 in a row, it's really distracting." And I was like, "I'm gonna get, I'm gonna, one of the lads is gonna eventually crack and be like, "Joanne, you can't keep coming back here. Like, you just can't."

• 32:55Speaker 01

  I'm due a Magic Mike now. I haven't gone since that time with you, and actually, when I saw it, I thought, "That is a bit of me."

• 33:01Speaker 00

  It's so much fun.

• 33:03Speaker 01

  And to think about, they were quite repulsed by us as well. Remember how much they did-

• 33:07Speaker 00

  They were, yeah, we were brought up after-

• 33:09Speaker 01

  And I thought we looked great that night. We looked great.

• 33:12Speaker 00

  We were brought up after, and to say they had zero interest, God loved them. They just want, they just want to go home. They want to go home to their husbands and boyfriends. I'm convinced, I'm sorry, you saw, you saw that lad dancing on me now, come on, like, come on. I don't want the stereotype, but he was clearly a gay man.

• 33:30Speaker 01

  This absolutely reeks, I used to have a friend, right, and, and like, she would break up with a guy, and like, without fail, they were narcissistic gay men. They're gay. He was gay. No, he was gay. He's a narcissist and he's gay. And it's like, everybody was a narcissistic gay man. Yeah, yeah. This reeks of that.

• 33:48Speaker 00

  My lap dance was a little short, Mike, that's all I'm gonna say. You know, you could have flicked a nipple, something, and there was-

• 33:55Speaker 01

  He was trying not to touch, rub crotches with you, Joanne. You were really humping back.

• 34:03Speaker 00

  It's just-

• 34:04Speaker 02

  He was presenting.

• 34:05Speaker 00

  I was presenting myself. It was, um, look, it's hot, it's a hot show, it's a hot show, and it's, and it's cheesy and fun and good crack. And it's arts, it's the arts, and it's, like, I was trying to convince one of my friends to come with me, and they were like, "I don't think it's my scene, like, is it not just, like, strippers?" I was like, "It's not, it's not strippers, it's a 360-degree acrobatic experience."

• 34:29Speaker 01

  They are actually extremely talented, like, they're incredible dancers, and that, yeah, there is acrobats in there, I have to agree with her, it is an experience to be had.

• 34:38Speaker 00

  And I don't mean to be a perv, but-

• 34:40Speaker 01

  Why don't we go as our Christmas night out?

• 34:42Speaker 00

  The back tats on these lads, fuck. Jesus Christ.

• 34:45Speaker 01

  I'm not as into tats as you are now, I have to say, remember? Bliss. You have Bliss, I have nothing, and Spencer has nothing. I don't mind the tats, but I just feel like, yeah, I feel like I'd have to just get, I couldn't just have, like, I'd need loads, like, you need to finish off a leg for me now.

• 35:02Speaker 00

  Well, so, yeah, so I, do I tell you I'm getting full written around the back?

• 35:07Speaker 01

  I don't know if she's serious or not. Are you?

• 35:09Speaker 00

  I'm dead, yeah, I'm dead serious, yeah. I'm gonna do it in Dallas.

• 35:11Speaker 02

  No, you surely not.

• 35:12Speaker 01

  That's actually quite funny, Jo, that's quite funny. That is funny.

• 35:15Speaker 00

  Bliss, full on the back?

• 35:18Speaker 02

  Yeah, it makes sense, once you've seen the front, but if you're just walking behind you and the back of your thigh says "full."

• 35:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, actually, I never thought about that. Have you considered that, Joanne?

• 35:28Speaker 00

  Why does that sound gross?

• 35:30Speaker 02

  It sounds disgusting, doesn't it?

• 35:32Speaker 01

  It just sounds, that sounds sexual. It does.

• 35:35Speaker 02

  She's full.

• 35:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, oh, God, Jo, you had to say it.

• 35:38Speaker 00

  What was the word you were saying this morning? Sounded disgusting. Scone, or was it, what was it? What was it? No, it was about a scone.

• 35:47Speaker 01

  A cronut.

• 35:48Speaker 00

  A cruffin.

• 35:53Speaker 00

  A croissant and a muffin.

• 35:57Speaker 00

  They're like, "Here's one of cruffin," and I was like, "What?"

• 36:02Speaker 01

  How could they think you need a fucking cruffin?

• 36:05Speaker 00

  They don't know we're well enough, they don't know, we've only been filming for a year together, they still think I do the cruffin. They're out of their minds.

• 36:14Speaker 01

  Have you ever tasted a cronut, though? They are actually pretty decent, but like, you can only have a taste, they're so bad for you.

• 36:20Speaker 00

  What's with the hybridness of it all?

• 36:21Speaker 01

  Hang on, can, can we just confirm that we're going to Magic Mike for our Christmas night out?

• 36:26Speaker 02

  Yeah, signed off, mate.

• 36:27Speaker 01

  We went fancy last time, we went to a sushi, and, yeah, we'll have to strap her on to the chair.

• 36:33Speaker 00

  If I'm allowed back in.

• 36:35Speaker 02

  God, she's humping again, she's humping again, we've got to go. Oh, God.

• 36:39Speaker 00

  I'd like to audition first.

• 36:42Speaker 01

  You're not gay, you're not gay, so you can't go.

• 36:47Speaker 01

  As you said, they only like gay people.

• 36:49Speaker 00

  I haven't seen you in weeks. You don't know what I'm doing out here. I'm eating cruffins, I'm gay for the stay.

• 36:57Speaker 00

  No, but I'd like to audition for the narrator. They have a female narrator at every show, who, like, leads it and guides it around. Anyway, I've a lot on-

• 37:04Speaker 01

  So you can watch more of it.

• 37:09Speaker 01

  She'd just stop narrating, just be watching.

• 37:12Speaker 00

  So I can try it on with everyone, and as each one of them rejects me, I'll be like, "Gay."

• 37:18Speaker 00

  Told you, they're like, "No, actually, just don't fancy you, I'm married with kids." Gay. Intimidated.

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• 37:44Speaker 05

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• 38:01Speaker 00

  What do you think about Kelly Clarkson ratting out that small independent business that wouldn't sell her the wooden bird for 15 grand?

• 38:11Speaker 01

  Okay, so, yeah, Kelly Clarkson, I'm, context again, I don't know what's wrong with me.

• 38:16Speaker 00

  Oh, God. Jesus.

• 38:18Speaker 01

  I know, Jesus Christ. She went into an art gallery, yeah, and then she wanted to buy that piece of art, and they told her that it wasn't for sale, but she could see a price tag on it, and they basically were like, "Would we like to show you something, like, a pretty woman vibe, like, show you something more in your own kind of price range," is the vibe that I got.

• 38:36Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 38:37Speaker 01

  And then she called them out online.

• 38:39Speaker 00

  Yeah, couple of things. One, have you seen this bird?

• 38:44Speaker 01

  Uh, send me a picture of it. No, no, let me just do a Kelly Clarkson bird.

• 38:48Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's, I swear to God, like, I'm moving into Timu Carpentry, because if they're selling this thing for 15 grand-

• 38:56Speaker 01

  What? She would find that? Why would she want to buy that for 15 grand?

• 38:58Speaker 00

  Joanne, the online debate is, should someone of her stature with her reach call out a small business? Right, so anyway, Kelly Clarkson says a Brooklyn store snubbed her. The shop says the item she wanted wasn't for sale. She accused a New York City store of treating her as though she couldn't afford its merchandise, but the business at the centre of her viral complaint offered a different explanation, um, saying, so she tweeted going, "Wow, dude, you're an idiot, you just lost a huge sale," and kind of described as a pretty woman a moment. He said it wasn't for sale. She's now doubled down and said it absolutely was. "I saw the price tag on it, you're a liar," and she's absolutely

• 39:38Speaker 00

  fuming about it, and I, I, I'm confused as to the ethics of it all, if you got me.

• 39:44Speaker 01

  I think that she could have called it out, the situation, but I don't think that she should have named and shamed. I'd be very, very slow to ever name and shame.

• 39:53Speaker 00

  I know.

• 39:54Speaker 01

  I, I just don't, I just don't think it's fair, even if those people are being an arsehole, I just, I wouldn't, I just wouldn't, I, I wouldn't do it, I'd feel too guilty. But I once went into a big shop that I could name and shame, and I went in and I was like, "I want to try on a dress," and the same thing, they were like, "That dress is three grand now, I wouldn't have spent three grand on it," but they didn't know that.

• 40:14Speaker 00

  They obviously listened to the podcast.

• 40:18Speaker 01

  And like, don't get your dirty paws in there.

• 40:20Speaker 00

  This, this tight bitch, she wouldn't spend Christmas. There's no way she's trying on that three grand dress.

• 40:28Speaker 01

  I, I wouldn't have even spent three hundred, let alone three grand. But anyway, it was my right to try on the dress in the shop.

• 40:35Speaker 00

  Of course it was.

• 40:36Speaker 01

  And they basically were just like, they kind of like, they, they obviously, they had spotted that I wouldn't be spending the three grand and just were really funny about it, like a pretty woman kind of vibe. But I just, I think it's really, I'm, I'm surprised by Kelly Clarkson.

• 40:49Speaker 00

  Well, I think, do you know what I think it is? I think that Kelly Clarkson, most American celebrities, from what I can tell, they all came from nothing. There's, there's always the rags to riches stories with, they came from nothing. They had no shoes. They were like shitting in the garden. It's always the same story. And now they're like billionaires, right? So I'm assuming Kelly's is the same story. And I'd say she was, to use the term, very triggered because she's obviously, you know, done so well for herself and made a lot of money. And I think it probably triggered one of her core beliefs in that she's, you know, came from nothing and that she's, she, she can't handle being treated that way again.

• 41:30Speaker 00

  So she obviously just saw red and, and flipped out. But I, I'd be the same. Like I, even that bar man up there, I'm all talk. I won't do any, I won't say anything to him. I'll just, I'll keep tipping him chunks of cash. I would never say, like, I would never say anything online. I'm the same. I, I just don't think it's worth it. I think you just have to breathe count to ten and move on. I really do.

• 41:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, she should. But now she's doubling down. It makes it even worse because she's had, she's had time to reflect. It's like, oh God. And just like, it's like, it's like when people are like, oh, business class and British Airways was awful. It's like, oh my God.

• 42:07Speaker 00

  I know.

• 42:08Speaker 01

  Please God, don't tweet that.

• 42:11Speaker 00

  I know.

• 42:12Speaker 01

  Business, lost my bags. Oh God, poor fucking you. Shut up.

• 42:15Speaker 00

  Kelly Clarkson saying she couldn't buy a wooden bird for 15 grand out of an independent store and she took to Twitter. Like, you know, there's a lot of layers there. But like I say, she's just, because she does seem like she's kind of sound. Sorry, can I just, speaking of celebrities spending outrageous money on stuff, I want.

• 42:33Speaker 01

  Who spent on what?

• 42:35Speaker 00

  I want you to guess, Vogue. I have a one, I have a one question quiz for you. You're favourite type.

• 42:41Speaker 01

  My favourite quiz is, yeah.

• 42:44Speaker 00

  Guess how much Paris Hilton paid for her, now I'm not going to call her a dog kennel because it is a two up, two down.

• 42:52Speaker 01

  I knew you were going to say the doghouse.

• 42:55Speaker 00

  Did you?

• 42:55Speaker 01

  This massive dog, yeah. She's this massive doghouse at the back of her gaff because it's so extravagant.

• 43:01Speaker 00

  Like you'd live in it yourself. Like it's, you'd live in it as a human.

• 43:04Speaker 01

  How much did she pay for that? I'm going to say she paid.

• 43:06Speaker 00

  Take a guess.

• 43:08Speaker 01

  A hundred K, but you know, I always overdo it because.

• 43:11Speaker 00

  Oh no. No, for once, Vogue, you've played the game correctly. Yeah. Joe, any ideas?

• 43:16Speaker 02

  How much? I am going to up the ante to a quarter of a million dollars. Two hundred and fifty thousand dollars, please.

• 43:25Speaker 00

  Up again.

• 43:27Speaker 01

  Oh, get lost. Half a million.

• 43:29Speaker 00

  Three hundred and twenty five thousand. Now dollars, which is about two pounds, but yeah, isn't that crazy?

• 43:37Speaker 01

  It's just.

• 43:37Speaker 00

  Like they've got a flat screen TV and all in there. I, I think they have a sauna.

• 43:41Speaker 01

  Do you know though, like, do you ever look, like the Kardashians have like these kids houses out the back of their house that looks like just a proper house with their Wendy houses, but like some of them are three stories and everything. But it's just like, I suppose we have so much money. They're not actually spending their money. They're only spending the interest probably on their money. Here I am talking like I know anything about their financial stuff, but like, they would have so much money that they won't even get through their interest, I'd say. So it means nothing to them. It's like free money.

• 44:06Speaker 00

  It's nothing. Yeah, it's nothing. Did you see your man, what's his name? The guy, we were speaking about him last week and we were saying he's a bit of a dick.

• 44:12Speaker 01

  Drake Davidson.

• 44:16Speaker 00

  Could have been anyone. If you said Richard Gere there, I was actually just going to hang up.

• 44:22Speaker 01

  I'm finished. You won't hear about him again until after Christmas. So there you go.

• 44:26Speaker 00

  Well, I think now in fairness, you deserve, you, you owe the listeners to listen to this 12 part podcast and give us your feedback.

• 44:34Speaker 01

  I will listen with bated breath. I can't wait until it's on.

• 44:37Speaker 00

  Yeah, you should do.

• 44:38Speaker 01

  I don't know why I'd have to listen with the bated breath. Okay, Joe keeps seeing a helicopter on us. We have to go. He's like a helicopter with his willy. He's helicoptering.

• 44:47Speaker 00

  Can't talk about his willy.

• 44:48Speaker 02

  I'm winding my hand around the top saying, wind it up, that's enough. Disgusting animals.

• 44:55Speaker 00

  Joe's sending us dick pics. We have to go.

• 44:58Speaker 02

  Oh dear me.

• 45:00Speaker 01

  Stop selling drugs outside my kid's school as well, Joe. It's not on.

• 45:03Speaker 02

  Oh, okay. All right. Bye bye. Bye bye, everyone.

• 45:07Speaker 01

  Bye.