Stop Living a Life You Didn’t Choose - Shaolin Monk Shi Heng Yi

Shi Heng Yi is a Shaolin master, headmaster of Shaolin Temple Europe, and teacher of Kung Fu and Chan Buddhism What can the Shaolin lifestyle teach us in a world full of distractions? In the rush of modern life, learning to pause, breathe, and reflect can be the difference between a good day and a bad one. So what other timeless principles can monks offer that still hold power today? Expect to learn what self mastery means and how to master yourself, the Shaolin monk approach to mental clarity and breath work, what to do if you feel like something is missing from your life, how people can better deal with regret, how you can be more present, the Shaolin training method to overcome modern distractions, how to build mental resilience and much more… 0:00 The Meaning of Self-Mastery 03:01 The Areas People Neglect the Most 06:20 How Much Control Can We Have Over Our Minds? 15:23 Preparing for Difficult Times During Times of Comfort 19:39 Why Become a Monk? 22:28 How to Begin Finding Your Purpose 28:45 Interrupting the Cycle of Pursuing Things 33:26 Balancing Self-Improvement & Self-Love 37:49 Dealing With Regret 41:56 Where Do Discipline & Focus Come From? 46:17 How Being a Monk Changes the Texture of Your Mind 51:02 Calming Our Unprocessed Trauma 55:52 The Courage to Face Our Own Pain - Get 60% off an annual plan of Incogni at ⁠https://incogni.com/modernwisdom⁠ Get 35% off your first subscription on the best supplements from Momentous at ⁠https://livemomentous.com/modernwisdom⁠ Get a Free Sample Pack of all LMNT Flavours with your first purchase at ⁠https://drinklmnt.com/modernwisdom - Get access to every episode 10 hours before YouTube by subscribing for free on Spotify - https://spoti.fi/2LSimPn or Apple Podcasts - https://apple.co/2MNqIgw Get Shaolin Master Shi Heng Yi Book: ⁠https://tinyurl.com/5drhan2c Get my free Reading List of 100 life-changing books here - https://chriswillx.com/books/ Try my productivity energy drink Neutonic here - https://neutonic.com/modernwisdom - Get in touch in the comments below or head to... Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx Email: https://chriswillx.com/contact/

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Chris Williamson?

  Where did the mustache go? You grew a mustache for a while and it's it's been banished.

• 0:06Speaker 01

  It is true, I um I rarely had a mustache. It's just that time when I appeared somewhere still having quite something on there. I just felt like, okay, let nature do its course and see how it feels.

• 0:23Chris Williamson?

  Okay.

• 0:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, but I do feel like like this is is maybe at the moment is more proper.

• 0:30Chris Williamson?

  Okay, okay. What do you mean when you talk about self mastery? What are you referring to?

• 0:41Speaker 01

  No, literally, let's talk about a little bit in the modern language, maybe. We are getting into some type of position. And then we are supposed to manage people.

• 0:56Speaker 01

  But I do think in order to manage people, it makes sense to actually know how to manage yourself in the first place. And this idea of we talk about mastering Kung Fu, mastering any type of art, mastering any type of sport even. But prior to that, I do think you carry yourself along throughout this lifetime since the beginning. And there are so many areas about ourself, let's say, body related or also mentally or emotionally related, that I just feel like

• 1:37Speaker 01

  many people haven't gotten to the point yet to really understand that just like we train our muscles and go to the gym to achieve something, there are also areas about us, human beings, let's say, that also need to be trained. And all of this taken together, I refer to as self mastery. Because no matter, you might change your job one day, you might change the location where you're living, the surrounding is gonna change, the people that you're dealing with is gonna change. But there's always one, one thing that always remains the same,

• 2:21Speaker 01

  which is you always carry yourself along the way.

• 2:25Speaker 01

  So you can't escape yourself, you can't escape your your dark sides.

• 2:32Speaker 01

  You can't escape your pain and your suffering and everything that in a way is triggering you also. And this is where I feel like to have this, let's say, concept at the moment, to really invest time in bringing out, understanding yourself better, and then build yourself up in all layers that nowadays we can dive into.

• 3:01Chris Williamson?

  What are the areas that you think people are neglecting the most when it comes to their self mastery?

• 3:10Speaker 01

  Let's start simple off.

• 3:14Speaker 01

  I, I think everybody knows the story of Frankenstein, yes? So meaning you literally put together everything that is physical, everything that is biological, you glue it all together. But that body still doesn't come alive. So I think in the story of the Frankenstein, there is still one missing element, which sometimes you could refer to as electricity or the spark or the fire. And this in the ancient traditions, if I read them and in my interpretation, for

• 3:58Speaker 01

  for the sake of understanding, I would say it is the mind. This is why in ancient traditions, you oftentimes have body and mind. So already by just looking at ancient traditions, what are they observing? What are we made out of? Body and mind. And so I think about myself, okay, good.

• 4:22Speaker 01

  We do know nowadays all the possibilities of training the body. But what is it actually, how to train the mind? And how can you understand? What do you mean by training the mind? And therefore, it's like, really, simply speaking, you know, we have arrived at the point in our society, people have become aware that your diet does have an effect on your overall well-being. So you buy the most biological food. You invest a lot of time, maybe only buying the best quality vegetables. Some people decide they only go vegan. So your diet matters.

• 5:07Speaker 01

  What you give your body to eat matters. And I do think in the same way, are you also paying so much attention and emphasis in actually paying attention? What is it that we are on a daily basis giving our mind to eat? So what type of thoughts are you aware of? That let's say pop up right away when you wake up in the morning? What is it you're nourishing?

• 5:39Speaker 01

  Are you nourishing right from the beginning? Competitive thoughts? Are you nourishing right from the beginning of waking up? Like, you need to do, there's always something to do. So, and these things, I do believe they matter. Because they also play into ultimately, what is, what is it that you are carrying along this world? And in your daily life, you carry the quality of the body and you carry the quality of your mind. And both of them taken together is what makes you literally you. In this earth at least.

• 6:20Chris Williamson?

  We don't get to choose the things that we think. We can't necessarily predict the next thought that's going to come careening into our brain. So what do you mean when you talk about how we feed and focus on what's inside of our minds? Given that sometimes, much of the time, our minds are outside of our control.

• 6:47Speaker 01

  So, I'm very surprised and I'm very, very thankful for you asking this question. But now that you are asking this question, then let's go a little bit deeper into

• 7:04Speaker 01

  what, let's say, somewhere along the line, I, I felt like it makes sense, yeah? I can only share what my observation is. So, number one is, I do like ancient traditions, because I do believe that all the cultures in the past, all traditions in the past, they carry something, which maybe is not understandable right away, but they carry some very, very valuable knowledge. And one of these knowledges is the saying that we are not the body and we are not the mind. This is one of these sakes.

• 7:45Speaker 01

  Now, we are not the body, we are not the mind.

• 7:50Speaker 01

  It doesn't fit so good. It's not easily understandable in the society that we are living right now, where everybody actually is identified so much with the creation of this and the creation of the identity that you want to express in this world. But let's go into some type of thinking experiment.

• 8:17Speaker 01

  If literally what I refer to as I,

• 8:22Speaker 01

  if I would be my body,

• 8:26Speaker 01

  I would simply take the decision right now, "Body, just stop aging. I don't want you to age anymore.

• 8:38Speaker 01

  I don't want you to feel pain. I don't want my body to tell me that I'm hungry right now, just stop the, just stop the hunger."

• 8:51Speaker 01

  So raising this question, I feel like I can't, I cannot tell my body what to do, literally. So this body somehow has his own cycle and his own intelligence that my body is going through. Okay, this is now the body. And just as you said, literally, it is impossible to predict what is going to be the next thought that's going to pop up in my mind. But if I would be my mind, how come I cannot have an influence in what I am thinking next?

• 9:37Speaker 01

  So, leading again to this idea, mind and body, both of them, apparently have another own cycle of what they are following.

• 9:53Speaker 01

  What's the conclusion? The conclusion is that nevertheless, body and mind that we carry along this lifetime right now can be and are conditioned.

• 10:10Speaker 01

  They carry some type of information. Simply said, I didn't choose, literally,

• 10:19Speaker 01

  to have this nose on my face. I didn't choose my eye color. I didn't choose the features that I carry in this lifetime right now. So there is information that is being transferred from generations in the past that in a way represent themselves right now in the body that we carry.

• 10:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, you might call it, it is embedded in the DNA or it is embedded in any type of biological or physical information. So if this is staying true right now for the body,

• 10:57Speaker 01

  could it also be that everything that pops up in our mind also carries some information that has been passed on prior for us being even conscious about it?

• 11:10Speaker 01

  Yes, and the answer for me is definitely, I do think it is like this, that modern science, if people relate to this more, for example, opens the field of epigenetics. Now, this is exactly what this field is about. And taking all of this into consideration right now, it still means, okay, but what literally is then the I? If I am not the body, if I'm not the mind, what is the I? Yes, so, and this is the essential question, that Buddhism, Zen Buddhism,

• 11:51Speaker 01

  and many mystic cultures are like trying to figure out. This is where, when you go on YouTube and you just put in, "Who am I? What am I? Where do I come from?" You find plenty of that stuff, yes? Okay. And it is a very, very, it's a very, very interesting question. And why? Because this answer of, "What is it that you're identifying yourself with?" Also gives you the answer, "How do I reduce the suffering of this lifetime?"

• 12:34Speaker 01

  That is essentially what all of this is about. How so?

• 12:41Speaker 01

  How so?

• 12:48Speaker 01

  If I could live a life, if I could live a life full of pleasure, full of enjoyable moments, no pain, no suffering, I would wish for eternal life for sure. Because it is the greatest thing that actually can happen to you. You're spending this life on earth and the only thing that you have is a pleasant life. So what more do you want?

• 13:19Speaker 01

  But the reality is not like that. The reality is, we have pleasant moments, we have joyful moments, we have healthy moments, we have enriching moments, but at the same time, we're also facing something where we could absolutely live without it, if we would have the choice.

• 13:43Speaker 01

  The fact of losing people, the fact of being betrayed, the fact of being judged, being insulted, being discriminated, being hurt.

• 13:59Speaker 01

  Many ways, many ways that do not feel pleasant.

• 14:05Speaker 01

  So, and there is the question, isn't there a way how to find a proper perspective upon life to, to understand what is it that I am embedded in in order to still try my best

• 14:23Speaker 01

  and reduce the amount of unpleasant or suffering, what we refer to it. This is the whole idea about it.

• 14:34Speaker 01

  So, also meaning, because I do think it's a very, very valid question if somebody is watching this episode and he's just happy.

• 14:46Speaker 01

  He has a perfect life, he is happy, there is nothing he's asking for, he's simply fulfilled.

• 14:55Speaker 01

  There is really no reason to continue listen to this, to this conversation.

• 15:01Speaker 01

  But I do think that either it hasn't been like this all the time, that person first of all went through some type of development or process, or the winning streak is gonna end at some point.

• 15:23Chris Williamson?

  It's interesting thinking about how

• 15:27Chris Williamson?

  lots of the work that we do is able to take place when times are good, but is needed most when times are bad. That if you are trying to develop a meditation practice, if you're trying to become more aware of your thoughts, if you're trying to become more peaceful, while you're in the middle of some catastrophe or challenge that's going on in your life,

• 15:50Chris Williamson?

  you're you're playing on hard mode there. But when things are good, by design, you don't want to spend so much time having to prepare for when times are bad. Because you think, well, everything's going great. I don't need to, I don't need to do that. And yeah, increasingly, when it comes to a mindfulness practice or

• 16:11Chris Williamson?

  journaling, gratitude, breathwork, anything that sort of steals your resolve, I think the best time to do it is when you don't need it. Because it allows you to be prepared for the times when you do.

• 16:26Speaker 01

  Yes, and I mean nowadays, if you want to calm your mind, the first practice that is being recommended to you is like meditation practices, most probably, yes. You know, if you come, for example, to any type of retreat place, to a temple, to a secluded place, somewhere in the nature, somewhere in the forest, and you spend some time there and by by nature already, let's say, it's very calm, the surrounding is very calm. It definitely helps for you to calm your mind and to start developing, how does it feel to be peaceful?

• 17:09Speaker 01

  But the reality at the same time is also that from all the people living nowadays in this world, the majority of all of us will never be able to even spend any time at such secluded places. Their reality takes place in the cities, takes place at work, takes place in partially the modern world that is very fast paced and

• 17:40Speaker 01

  And crowded, let's say. But it's exactly in these places where this peace and this calm would be the most beneficial.

• 17:52Speaker 01

  Because if anyway in the forest, nothing is going on.

• 17:57Speaker 01

  You don't necessarily need to practice too much to be peaceful and calm.

• 18:04Speaker 01

  It is in the moment where you have so much external stimuli that are triggering you. This is then the moment in order to really bring out the quality of your meditative practices. Yes. And this is why, like, you know, on the one side, I receive plenty, plenty of, of critics in terms also of how come I give so much podcasts and interviews and, and bring all of these things outside the walls of, let's say, prior of our temple.

• 18:41Speaker 01

  Maybe I'm jumping a little bit, but overall, I do think that we humans are made to live in a community or in a society. We cannot just live by ourselves.

• 18:54Speaker 01

  So this is the reason why I do feel like when I know that there is something valuable to know, something helpful, and you don't even have to spend any money on it, because it's simply just, I tell you what it is and you practice it and that's it and it's going to benefit your life, I do feel like it should go out there in the world. Very, very simply said, regardless of whether it's, what's the origin or if there is a tradition behind it or not. So it's functional, first of all. It doesn't cost anything, it's functional and it's beneficial. And this is the reason why, um, yeah, why I do like to put these things out.

• 19:38Chris Williamson?

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• 20:22Chris Williamson?

  description below, heading to incogni.com/modernd wisdom and using the code MODERNWISDOM at checkout. That's I-N-C-O-G-N-I dot com slash modern wisdom and modern wisdom at checkout. I'd always assumed that monks were sort of born into this life. I don't know where I thought they came from, but I didn't realise that people could have backgrounds like yours. You had a bunch of degrees, an MBA, and then gave that up to focus on this new life. Why leave all of that stuff behind?

• 20:57Speaker 01

  So, and this is also a very, very interesting topic. So I grew up here in Germany and, as you said, went like the system of academic education during university. And at some point, I consciously took this decision that I actually wanna dedicate my life to something that for me internally felt it gives me purpose. Yeah, meaning I didn't wanna sell any product I cannot stand behind and I cannot offer any type of service that I'm myself not good in.

• 21:40Speaker 01

  And by that time where I took this decision, I was spending many, many years since the age of four, practicing what nowadays you know as Chinese Kung Fu or Shaolin Kung Fu. And it helped me. Going through all this academic education, under the pressure of my parents, under the pressure of the society in a way, to prove yourself that you are worth something. My valve

• 22:11Speaker 01

  of balancing all of these energies has always been the physical practice or the training. So this was the initial point where I said, “Okay,

• 22:22Speaker 01

  let’s try to emphasize a little bit this idea. You use physical methods with the right mindset in order to benefit your overall 24-hour day.” And this was the moment where the Shaolin Temple Europe, as it is known today, was built. But completely free of, you don’t have to be a monk, you don’t have to live inside the monastery, but there are certain things to pay attention on. Because I didn’t grow up as a monk, so how can I promote for the people you all have to become monks? No.

• 23:04Speaker 01

  The special thing is that I just grew up like many people in this world, like in both worlds. At some point, I just consciously decided, “Ah, there is a link that we can use.”

• 23:23Chris Williamson?

  If it feels like something’s missing from life in the way that it seems like it was for you, why should people begin?

• 23:39Speaker 01

  If your life is fine, if your life is fine, then most probably you also don't have questions.

• 23:47Speaker 01

  But I do believe, let's say,

• 23:52Speaker 01

  either the longer you live this life, or

• 23:58Speaker 01

  the more you start observing actually the patterns of this life, at some point, questions will come up.

• 24:09Speaker 01

  And if a person doesn't ask the question, he also cannot receive the answer. And for me, it literally was like this, that

• 24:23Speaker 01

  I would consider myself also belonging to the category of like, achieving, achieving, achieving and doing and being a workaholic and controlling things and, yeah, and overachieving.

• 24:38Speaker 01

  But at some point, after achieving many of these different areas, I still was left there with, with the question,

• 24:48Speaker 01

  was that it? Was that now the sense of my life?

• 24:54Speaker 01

  And because it was, I felt like it was like not enough, or I was missing out on something because it was just too,

• 25:05Speaker 01

  too simple. It was too, too shallow for me. I couldn't imagine that like attaining degrees or attaining whatever you like material wise are looking for, that this is going to be the purpose of your life. So going to work every day in order just to buy something that eventually you come to the conclusion, you won't take it with you anyway.

• 25:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, so we came without it and we're gonna go without it.

• 25:36Speaker 01

  And that was then the question, okay? So what is literally the, the sense of all of this?

• 25:44Speaker 01

  And this is where, yeah, I do think it is a personal journey, but slowly I start to understand just more and more things. By just observing what I'm all the time surrounded with.

• 26:01Speaker 01

  And what is it? It is pattern. This is now where it's maybe becoming interesting and where people can maybe start to relate to. You know, on the one side, everybody, what is it we we truly feel like wanting?

• 26:18Speaker 01

  Or maybe not, but freedom.

• 26:23Speaker 01

  Not being restricted.

• 26:26Speaker 01

  I want to be free.

• 26:29Speaker 01

  Freedom on the one side, but then what is it that is not granting you freedom? The opposite, I would say, it is structure and pattern.

• 26:45Speaker 01

  Because if there is a structure, if there is a pattern, what does it mean? It means you do not have the freedom to decide what you want to do. So it sounds like at the moment that freedom is on the one side and pattern and structure is on the other side. So now the fact is like this, like I just said before, in regards to the body and in regards to the mind. Our body already is following a certain pattern. His own biological pattern. Our mind and therefore also our behavior is also following certain patterns.

• 27:32Speaker 01

  Talking about this pattern also meaning, just look at a very simple pattern that also appears in all of our lives and probably in the lives of our children. There comes the point, they start to want something.

• 27:49Speaker 01

  So it could have been at some point we wanted to have the first mobile phone that came out at the time where mobile phones are just not existing yet. And so the first Nokia came out, we wanted to have it. After some time, we got it. But then came the next development, the smartphone. We wanted to have it and we got it.

• 28:15Speaker 01

  And no matter what it is, there is always something that we want.

• 28:22Speaker 01

  We're gonna get it if we work hard enough for it. But then also something, something always the same starts to hit in. Whatever was there that you wanted at some point after a day, after a week, after a month, it was forgotten. It didn't play a role even anymore in your life, especially if it is some type of material attainment.

• 28:47Speaker 01

  So the question is, should I spend my whole life now just following this pattern? Working for something that I put in my mind that I want, achieving it and then realizing at some point,

• 29:02Speaker 01

  lifetime is gone? And the pleasure and the enjoyment of what I try to attain there actually isn't also really sustainable? So and already this type of pattern to observe it

• 29:21Speaker 01

  can break a cycle. It can break the cycle of you or anyone running after things unconsciously because you are caught inside a pattern,

• 29:36Speaker 01

  which at some point is just very, very senseless.

• 29:41Chris Williamson?

  I think that is a cycle that people are very familiar with. I want a thing, I work to achieve a thing, I get the thing. Maybe there's some respite from wanting for a little while, maybe there isn't. I want another thing and the cycle just repeats. How do you come to think about interrupting that, this sort of

• 30:06Chris Williamson?

  permanent loop of want, pursue, achieve, want again?

• 30:14Speaker 01

  When you yourself are caught in the pattern and you are being identified by this pattern, you cannot escape it.

• 30:27Speaker 01

  If you are identified with this pattern, you cannot escape it. So this is now where it helps this ancient saying before, "You are not the body and you are not the mind."

• 30:41Speaker 01

  So even if you just take this as a concept right now, then it means from time to time, try to just, let's say, jump out of yourself and just observe yourself. Just imagine it is a movie. This is the movie character and I'm jumping out and I'm watching the movie of this one. And from this perspective, suddenly I see something differently. I can see it from a wider perspective because I'm not caught inside my own patterns anymore, but suddenly I begin to see the patterns of this character.

• 31:24Speaker 01

  So whether you believe in this now or not, it's just about a mind experiment. Just use it as a game if you like. Just go out and watch yourself. Watch your life unfolding.

• 31:40Speaker 01

  And then this is the beginning where you actually see patterns, where you see behavior that is repeating. Well, some patterns are useful, some patterns are not useful. And step by step, so number one is becoming aware first of all. What type of patterns are you able to realize and see inside your own life? I think this is where it starts. The awareness and ability to observe yourself. And there you see the awareness to observe yourself,

• 32:24Speaker 01

  awareness, mindfulness and be conscious about yourself. This is why meditation practice, for what? To become more aware. Mindfulness practices, why? To become mindful.

• 32:43Speaker 01

  To become conscious, because this is the beginning in order to break the cycle of this conditioned being, of the conditioned identity.

• 32:55Speaker 01

  And just one more thing, maybe in this case to add.

• 33:01Speaker 01

  People may be also confused, I'm saying, don't have goals and don't work for something you really wish for. I didn't say that, because I still do it. I do have visions and I do have wishes sometimes. But those are very conscious wishes meanwhile.

• 33:23Speaker 01

  So literally, when my mind is flooded with so many possibilities,

• 33:31Speaker 01

  I just have become more conscious in really deciding, in what do I really want to invest my lifetime?

• 33:41Speaker 01

  Is it worth it to attain it that I'm working for right now? And if I still come to the conclusion, yes, even though this lifetime is limited, but to experience whatever it is, yes, it's worth it, I'm gonna go for it. Well, then, then do it. The only thing I try to really prevent people from doing is unconsciously following structures and patterns and cycles. In the imagination, it's gonna give them something that they are longing for,

• 34:20Speaker 01

  but it won't.

• 34:22Chris Williamson?

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• 35:06Chris Williamson?

  Plus, they ship internationally. Right now, you can get 35% off your first subscription and that 30 day money back guarantee by going to the link in the description below. By heading to livemomentous.com/modernd wisdom and using the code MODERNWISDOM at checkout. That's L I V E M O M E N T O U S dot com slash modern wisdom and modern wisdom at checkout. You said that you're someone who likes to chase improvement, wants to achieve things, even if they're very well designed, if they're very intentional. How do you come to think about balancing a desire for self-improvement with self-love? A lot of the time, the need for self-improvement comes with a side order of disdain for yourself until you achieve that thing. And that, I think, is also another cycle that people go through

• 35:51Chris Williamson?

  as opposed to trying to achieve something externally, trying to reach something, whether it's a new job title, a new qualification, a streak on their med- even a streak on their meditation, right? You're doing something to improve yourself and there is a lack of self-love until you've achieved it. And if you fail at that thing, then there is a lack of self-love that comes along with it. And then you have regret as well about having not been able to achieve the thing that you said you were going to in the promises that you made.

• 36:20Speaker 01

  Yes, very, very nice. Why would I in the first place go into action at all? So why would I go into doing something?

• 36:33Speaker 01

  So?

• 36:36Speaker 01

  Well, because apparently something is lacking, I would say it's like this. Why would I set a goal? Because I assume that when I reach the goal, it's going to give me something that in the moment where I'm setting the goal, I don't have.

• 36:52Speaker 01

  So this is why doing or going into action or achieving something comes into play. Why would I need to achieve something if in this very moment, I don't feel like I'm missing anything, that there needs something to be achieved? So this is where on the one side, we have this area of doing, achieving, going into action.

• 37:23Speaker 01

  And the other part is: Everything is good as it is. There is nothing to achieve. I am, I am self fulfilled. I'm self satisfied. I am being. So, we have being and we have doing. So, and this is for me, literally. How do I find this balance between being and doing? Because now, of course, some people say, "Yeah, if all the time I would be just satisfied with being, well, then, nothing would be done in this world in a way. Nothing would happen. So, how do I feed my children?

• 38:08Speaker 01

  How do I pay my bills?" So, of course, it is, it is not realistic to just stay in this state of being.

• 38:20Speaker 01

  But at the same time, if you constantly doing, doing and go into action, the result of this is, what we described before, you run after things, you achieve it. But instead of even holding on a moment and enjoy your achievement, be proud of you of what you have achieved, remain a moment in this feeling of, "Yes",

• 38:50Speaker 01

  it feels good. Yeah, the problem is that we already put the next goal and start running again. So, one is just leading to the fact of you never stand still. You don't find your peace. There is no peace.

• 39:10Speaker 01

  And the other thing is, you have peace, but you have no progress.

• 39:16Speaker 01

  And this, I do think, is something that we as humans need to, or not need to, but I do think it's very natural to balance out exactly those two areas and be very aware. You're not supposed to do nothing, but you're also not supposed to run and run and run and never arrive. Both of them are like pointless.

• 39:44Speaker 01

  And I do think this is the balance.

• 39:47Chris Williamson?

  How do you advise people to deal with regret? A lot of the time, we look back at decisions that we could have made. If only I'd realized that the balance between being and doing, I'd come to earlier, I'd not done that MBA that I didn't need to. If I'd found meditation sooner in my life, if I'd let go of that partner and moved on to the one that was supposed to be for me. People can be very captured, I think, and that's a different type of cycle that we get stuck into, one where we're ruminating about the past. What's your perspective on regret?

• 40:20Speaker 01

  Okay, I'm trying to not get too philosophical about these things.

• 40:31Speaker 01

  If I wished,

• 40:34Speaker 01

  I wished that I would have lived this life and I just have joyful and pleasant moments. No regret, no sorrow, no fear, nothing of that. The reality is, is not like that.

• 40:51Speaker 01

  The reality is that every human being at some point is facing all of this.

• 40:59Speaker 01

  But I used to think I would never arrive or be at the place where I am right now with, without all the things that happened in the past.

• 41:14Speaker 01

  Because at some point, the sorrow or even the regrets, they have been so painful in a way that I was left only with like two choices. Number one, you learn from what went wrong.

• 41:32Speaker 01

  And number two, and this is the, I do think is a very hard part. It's the part of learning to let go.

• 41:42Speaker 01

  By forgiving. Forgiving to two areas. In case somebody is involved, you forgive the one that is involved. But foremost, you forgive this one.

• 42:00Speaker 01

  You know, so it's, we always think about how should we forgive like other people, which is already very hard. But it's even harder to sometimes forgive yourself. But, um.

• 42:27Speaker 01

  You can't, you can't move into the future. You cannot move on if you still carry old baggage uh inside of you. Yeah, and this is where I feel like it must be learned.

• 42:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, maybe people take it as normal to live a life and keep regret and keep frustration and keep all these things inside of them and not heal it, not let it out, not express it, not learn a way to get rid of it. Yeah, but at the same time, I also believe this is the reason why people suffer from so many different type of diseases at the same time. Because there is some type of, and I call it now in my terminology, there is energy locked inside of you that wants to be expressed, yeah, but you suppress it. And this is why it has to find a way to,

• 43:27Speaker 01

  yeah, to, to make itself hurt.

• 43:32Speaker 01

  Which can be a sickness, which can be cancer, which can be all type of mental diseases that nowadays I think this society has a lot of it.

• 43:45Speaker 01

  Yes, and um.

• 43:49Speaker 01

  The letting go part, that is the letting go part.

• 43:55Chris Williamson?

  Where does discipline and focus come from? That seems to be a huge part of your life of Shaolin philosophy as well. Where do you come to think about the origins of discipline and focus and how you build it?

• 44:10Speaker 01

  So we talked before about the area of progress, meaning setting goals, achieving something, doing something.

• 44:23Speaker 01

  The quickest way, meaning to not waste lifetime,

• 44:32Speaker 01

  is when you really

• 44:37Speaker 01

  set up a schedule and just do the work.

• 44:44Speaker 01

  Free from how you feel. Because also feeling sometimes, you wake up one day, you feel this way, you wake up the next day, you feel another way. And it's just not helpful to base your structure or your goal on how you feel. So, and this is where I think we are, for example, discipline, meaning you stick to what you put there on paper.

• 45:17Speaker 01

  You take your time, you make the plan, and unless you really are sick or have some type of, of, of, of, of higher excuse,

• 45:30Speaker 01

  you just, you just do what you have committed to. So, and this struggling of, there are still so many distractions every day coming up. No, but you stick to the plan, you stick to your plan. This is what I feel like is a part of discipline, to do what you have committed yourself to. It's the one area. And at the same time, discipline also meaning

• 46:00Speaker 01

  you don't do the things you already know are not good for you.

• 46:06Speaker 01

  So, discipline is not just about the active part of doing something. It also relates to the passive part of leaving the things out of your life where you already know it's not gonna help you. Both of these areas is, let's say, discipline. Focus for me is the ability, the ability to mobilize your energy.

• 46:36Speaker 01

  Energy, maybe doesn't tell anything to the people. Your intention, your mind, your awareness. So, let's say, uh, I need to do some, some type of work. I need to, I need to write an email, simple.

• 46:56Speaker 01

  The quickest way and most accurate way to write this email is if you are completely with complete your awareness, you are focused in writing this email right now. You don't look at the mobile phone at the same time. You don't listen to music. You don't watch another television show on the screen. You don't eat something at the same time. Your focus is on that one task.

• 47:27Speaker 01

  Because your focus is on that one task, this is why everything that you are made out of can flow into whatever you are creating there.

• 47:38Speaker 01

  Yes, so you don't do like the bench press and do, and do something for the legs at the same time. It doesn't make sense.

• 47:48Speaker 01

  And so, to mobilize energy means to know exactly where am I focusing my attention? And therefore, where attention goes, there the energy flows. Yes, so this is what focus means for me. If you want to create something, it's better to know.

• 48:13Speaker 01

  Where does your attention go?

• 48:16Chris Williamson?

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• 49:01Chris Williamson?

  Right now, you can get a free sample pack of all eight flavors with your first box by going to the link in the description below. I'm heading to drinklmnt.com/ModernWisdom. That's drinklmnt.com/ModernWisdom. How different is the texture of your mind now, after all of this time in contemplation, in releasing, in mindfulness, in physical practice? You know, as somebody that didn't come into this world completely untrained, it's not like you'd never seen any of this sort of insight before. You were probably practicing qigong, tai chi, stuff like that, maybe a little bit beforehand.

• 49:40Chris Williamson?

  But I'm interested as someone who is a sort of normal level of mindfully aware.

• 49:49Chris Williamson?

  I don't even know if you can remember what it was like to have that mind previously or if it feels like ancient history.

• 49:59Speaker 01

  I would probably say, you know, it's not that you are like walking this path and then you are like becoming superhuman or anything like this. It is very, very simple. You just become less compulsive and less reactive to whatever is going on in this world.

• 50:24Speaker 01

  Because this is where I felt like at some point I don't want this anymore. I don't want to be driven by what is going on out there in the world. I don't want to be driven by what is happening out there where I feel like I have no influence on.

• 50:46Speaker 01

  It can be the decision of the governments, it can be the decision of whatever is being propagated in this world, which is ultimately affecting me and I just didn't feel like I want to be dependent on external circumstances. Because this just doesn't feel like my life is in my hands.

• 51:11Speaker 01

  So how can it be that the people around me, circumstances around me, that I literally have really no influence on? How can it be that all of this is influencing my life to such an extent that it makes me suffer, that it is frustrating me, that I feel depressed about it, that I feel angry about it, that I feel sad about it? At some point I just felt like it's very unstable.

• 51:43Speaker 01

  And so I started to ask myself, "How come that I cannot manage myself better in a better way?" And this is where now all this so-called "inner work" starts to take place, where the self-mastery takes place. You are not trying to solve the issues of your government. You are not trying to solve the problems of your neighbor. The first thing you try to solve is everything that is able to trigger you.

• 52:26Speaker 01

  To not be at ease with how this life is.

• 52:31Speaker 01

  So, and so what is the ultimate outcome of starting to invest some time in yourself? I would say you are getting more at ease regardless of what is happening on the outside. So it doesn't mean you are becoming more ignorant to it. That is also a misconception. Yeah? It is just the fact that the world around you, everything is like still in turmoil and everything is still burning. But because you are at ease, because you have become more stable, at least in this burning surrounding,

• 53:13Speaker 01

  you can now still be the guide to help the people out of the house.

• 53:19Speaker 01

  Because if you lose your temper and if you are getting stressed when the house is burning, who's gonna guide the way? So, and this is how I felt my life was also slowly, slowly developing in the sense that

• 53:36Speaker 01

  if I really feel like I would like to contribute something to this world, to this society, then it can only be done

• 53:47Speaker 01

  if I'm already at ease and with peace inside of myself, that then I can carry out in the world.

• 53:59Chris Williamson?

  It is strange to think about how much

• 54:05Chris Williamson?

  noise gets created by people

• 54:09Chris Williamson?

  panicking and sort of gripping and flapping at their unprocessed issues. You know, you're hearing people speak, but what's actually coming out of their mouth is not what they necessarily even mean to say. It's some strange, secret code that their body or the way that they've dealt with their past traumas or the way that they've absorbed society's desires for them to follow. It's very odd how...

• 54:43Chris Williamson?

  A lot, maybe most, maybe nearly all of what people are actually doing is not saying what they mean to say. It's saying, they're being puppeted by their own mind, they're being puppeted by their own past in that way. And I think trying to quiet that is not just a

• 55:03Chris Williamson?

  gift that you can give yourself, but it's probably a gift that you can give the rest of the world as well, because they don't need to put up with what it is that you're talking about that isn't what you meant to talk about.

• 55:14Speaker 01

  So

• 55:17Speaker 01

  primarily my work, let's say for the past thirteen, fourteen years.

• 55:25Speaker 01

  You know, if you look, for example, on everything that primarily was was shared with the world, mostly I just try to encourage people, do something with your body. Just do something with your body, whether it's qigong, whether it's some stretching exercises, whether it's kung fu, whether it's tai chi. So it was something physical in the first place. But the whole idea was not only to make the people move, this was just like the beginning. But what we need is awareness. What we need is awareness. So if you're already not aware of of this body,

• 56:07Speaker 01

  it becomes even more difficult to be aware of what goes on in your mind. What type of traumas do you carry inside of you? If you're not even aware of your own body, something physical, something that you have every day in front of the mirror, how can you become aware of something that is so deeply rooted inside of you that you just can't even see it so easily? So the whole idea of emphasizing

• 56:37Speaker 01

  physicality, I would say, is the first step to begin the path of becoming aware.

• 56:47Speaker 01

  With this awareness now, the journey hasn't ended. The journey has just begun. Because it's this awareness now that we need to use and actually start now looking inside ourself. Yeah. But exactly in the areas that for many, many years, maybe, were hidden there, consciously hidden, or sometimes unconsciously hidden, areas that we ran away from, that we hid it, that we rid it, that we somehow started to cover up because in the past they caused us too much pain, too much irritation.

• 57:31Speaker 01

  But I do think that at the same time that there is no other way

• 57:39Speaker 01

  to really clean yourself up. Yeah, there is no other way to clean yourself up than really looking at all the stuff that's hidden inside of you. I didn't wanna say shit, but sometimes there's a sometimes there's a lot of it. Yeah, and I don't have to make a

• 58:09Speaker 01

  you know, how do I know? Because I know, because I had to do it myself.

• 58:17Speaker 01

  So it is uncomfortable. It is uncomfortable to at some point start to realize what type of stuff, dark stuff, negative stuff have you yourself, me, myself, done in this lifetime?

• 58:37Speaker 01

  But only after you really see it and you recognize that it was wrong.

• 58:45Speaker 01

  After you repent, then comes the freedom.

• 58:49Chris Williamson?

  Where does the bravery come from to face that? It's gonna be scary, it's gonna be painful. How should people think about the courage that they need to, to face it?

• 59:04Speaker 01

  I think that there are many ways how you can, let's say, motivate yourself

• 59:12Speaker 01

  to walk this path. So why would I face the dark side of myself knowing already that it's gonna be painful? Why would I do that? So there are many ways. Me, from the part, from the area of the martial arts, I just know, every time I suffered in the training, afterwards, something really good came out of it.

• 59:38Speaker 01

  Yeah. Same is like, every time you face a challenge that was really, really difficult for you, but you still pushed it through somehow. You still like were patient and persevered and were consistent and still tried. And this type of challenge, for me, was a way bigger victory than anything that was easily attained. So literally saying, nothing easy, no, nothing sustainable and worse while in this lifetime comes from something that's easily attained.

• 1:00:15Speaker 01

  And in the same way, I do regard it with all the areas now when we go into facing yourself. So, you know, it's the what I'm saying, it's the same that you find plenty of videos right now, you know. Face your shadow. Face the dark side. Look at your demons. It's all that. And I, I can only say that from the way of how I grew up and after like thirty-eight years right now being on this way, yes. Yes, I do think that's the way.

• 1:00:53Chris Williamson?

  Shuheng Yi, ladies and gentlemen. Where should people go? They're gonna wanna keep up to date with the things that you're doing, what you've got going on? Where do you want to send them on the internet?

• 1:01:03Speaker 01

  Well, I do think the easiest, easiest thing, Chris, would be just add something in the description. And if people feel somehow resonating with some of the ideas, you know, everybody is free to, to just see whatever is available right now. I think there's plenty of information already. Yes, and like I said, if you don't ask the question, the answer cannot come. But I do think that at some point, we're all going to face the same steps in our development. And if the question doesn't come now, just know the answer's already out there.

• 1:01:44Chris Williamson?

  I appreciate you very much. Thank you for today.

• 1:01:47Speaker 02

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