Ep 544 - Autophagy (feat. Chris O'Connor)

Support the D. A. W. G. Z. @ patreon.com/MSsecretpod Support Kiss @ https://www.patreon.com/stuffisland Go See Matt Live @ mattmccusker.com/dates Go See Shane Live @ shanemgillis.com Yo0o0o0o0o0o0o0. Another fambly ep but we got the kiss man here this week. Matt fasted for over 48hrs. Broke fast right before we started. Hot ass mf cast. Please enjoy. God Bless. Download the PrizePicks app or visit https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/DRENCHED today and use code Drenched to get $50 instantly after you play your first $5 lineup Try BlueChew FREE when you use our promo code DRENCHED at checkout - just pay $5 shipping. That’s bluechew.com/, promo code DRENCHED to receive your first month FREE. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:15Speaker 00

  Then you take them off when you get to the.

• 0:17Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, sneakers on the beach.

• 0:18Speaker 02

  Depends how hot the sand is.

• 0:19Matt McCusker?

  Sauce as hell.

• 0:22Matt McCusker?

  We going? We rolling? Oh my motherfucking god.

• 0:26Speaker 02

  Christopher.

• 0:27Speaker 00

  Wait, what's the turn?

• 0:28Speaker 02

  Off of the wrong foot.

• 0:31Speaker 00

  Nah, he thinks I'm mad at him for sneakers on the beach.

• 0:35Matt McCusker?

  Sneakers on the beach is weird.

• 0:38Speaker 00

  Beazer's literally the only white guy I've ever seen. Uh, I bet.

• 0:41Matt McCusker?

  Unless you're a local.

• 0:42Speaker 00

  My cousin Frank did it.

• 0:43Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 0:44Speaker 00

  He wore sneakers on the beach.

• 0:46Matt McCusker?

  All of us has one like video game cousin who would not go, who played video games at the beach the whole time. And then he'd come down at like 5pm in sneakers and he'd be like, bro, what are you doing? You're not coming to the arcade with me, dude.

• 0:57Speaker 00

  Bees, that's the bees, dude.

• 1:01Speaker 02

  Yeah, sneakers on the beach.

• 1:02Speaker 00

  Are you a sneakers on the beach guy?

• 1:04Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah, a lot of, you know, cause I, I.

• 1:07Speaker 00

  That's so dumb.

• 1:08Matt McCusker?

  How many times you unexpectedly go to the beach?

• 1:11Speaker 00

  When did you surprise go to the beach?

• 1:13Speaker 02

  It's not that I prefer it.

• 1:14Speaker 00

  When did you surprise go to the beach?

• 1:17Speaker 02

  I feel like the last time I was at the Danny Improv. I got surprised with the beach. I didn't really know how close it's gonna be to the beach. So then I have sneakers on the beach.

• 1:25Matt McCusker?

  Don't you take, don't you take your.

• 1:26Speaker 02

  I just gotta get this in before you guys attack me. I'm not yelling, you're yelling, dude.

• 1:33Speaker 02

  Bro.

• 1:34Matt McCusker?

  And then I don't have sandal. I don't like have sandals a lot.

• 1:37Speaker 02

  Yeah, but you take your shoes off, leave them at the top and you roll your pant legs up and you walk on your bare feet in the beach.

• 1:42Matt McCusker?

  I mean, if I'm really missing the sand and it's, it's a partly cloudy day, I'll do it. But if it's just, the sun's been baking and you get there kinda late.

• 1:50Speaker 00

  You got sand in your shoes for the rest of your life.

• 1:52Matt McCusker?

  You are, no, I walk, I walk, I have a special walk.

• 1:57Matt McCusker?

  No, for real, if you're in hot sand, if you dig your feet under the surface sand, you can get through.

• 2:01Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:01Matt McCusker?

  When you go down to the beach in shoes, you have, you're literally crushing the vibe.

• 2:06Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 2:06Matt McCusker?

  For every single person enjoying the big, oh, what the fuck is this guy doing here? It's so unwelcome.

• 2:12Speaker 02

  I'd try to make up for it with my other beach activities, you know, I get right into the surf. I throw a ball around, I do frisbee, I'll do paddle ball, you know?

• 2:19Matt McCusker?

  You're good, yeah, but, but.

• 2:21Speaker 02

  Get me down to the, like, the, the, the sand that the water's hit already.

• 2:25Matt McCusker?

  I feel like you die on this hill, that's not fair.

• 2:26Speaker 00

  You'll die on every single fucking hill. Any hill, you name a hill. We've seen, we've, I've seen you die on the sand hill before. This is the second sand-related, hellish argument.

• 2:39Matt McCusker?

  We can't talk sand, dude.

• 2:40Speaker 00

  We cannot talk sand. A comment has an intense relationship with sand.

• 2:45Speaker 02

  I'm just saying, not everyone who wears sneakers on the beach is an asshole.

• 2:49Matt McCusker?

  I don't say they're an asshole, I'm saying they're weird.

• 2:54Speaker 02

  I'm saying, sometimes.

• 2:56Speaker 00

  If they're what? Sometimes it's culturally acceptable to wear sneakers.

• 2:59Matt McCusker?

  Black people don't like their bare feet on the ground. That's, you have to respect that.

• 3:02Speaker 02

  Is that, that?

• 3:03Matt McCusker?

  Oh yeah, dude.

• 3:04Speaker 02

  So they don't like the sand in between their toes?

• 3:07Matt McCusker?

  Not really. My wife doesn't like the sand. I, like, it actually, like, angered me the first time she told me. She's like, yeah, just like, I don't like how it gets all over me. And I was just like, what the fuck are you talking about?

• 3:15Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 3:15Matt McCusker?

  Why are you ruining a good thing here?

• 3:16Speaker 00

  Yeah, why are you ruining the best?

• 3:17Matt McCusker?

  I love the beach, it's my favorite thing. She's like, I just don't, sand makes me, it just feels gross on my feet. And I'm like, what the fuck, dude?

• 3:24Speaker 00

  It feels so good.

• 3:25Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I take my kids away, I'm like, don't listen to this motherfucker. Trust me. Yeah, that's, uh, yeah, that's, that's something I've seen. I mean, it's, it's literally goes back to the socks at the water park.

• 3:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:36Matt McCusker?

  That's why, that's why they're there, bro. They're not, it's not just, it's not like a fashion statement, it's like genuine phobia of just the ground.

• 3:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 3:43Matt McCusker?

  Still to them by a paranoid black mother.

• 3:46Matt McCusker?

  Swear to God.

• 3:47Speaker 00

  How do you fellows feel about this?

• 3:48Speaker 02

  Is it microbes? Is it microbes getting in there?

• 3:50Speaker 00

  Socks at the water park, guys?

• 3:51Speaker 02

  You think it's, is it germs?

• 3:54Speaker 00

  It's germs.

• 3:54Speaker 02

  It's a germ-related thing?

• 3:56Speaker 03

  Uh, a little bit. Also, some water parks are just super shitty and dirty. Like, I've never been a socks in the water park guy, but you ever see those, like, water socks? Like, they're made just for that?

• 4:05Matt McCusker?

  Aqua socks are pretty good.

• 4:07Speaker 00

  That's a pretty big honky, uh.

• 4:09Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:10Speaker 00

  Aqua socks are definitely the honks.

• 4:11Matt McCusker?

  That's gotta be a little honky swag.

• 4:13Speaker 00

  That is, for sure.

• 4:14Speaker 03

  I would see her, I would see.

• 4:16Speaker 02

  Aqua socks?

• 4:17Speaker 03

  I don't think so. My whole family did it.

• 4:19Matt McCusker?

  Really?

• 4:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 4:20Matt McCusker?

  I've only ever seen you guys in Jordan socks.

• 4:25Matt McCusker?

  I believe you, I believe you though. Well, sorry. Dude, I've only ever seen him in the longest tube socks ever.

• 4:33Speaker 00

  For sure.

• 4:35Matt McCusker?

  Half flapping off the foot.

• 4:37Speaker 00

  Wife beaters on still. Well, you gotta keep the beater on. No, you don't. It becomes see-through. It looks fucking crazy.

• 4:45Speaker 00

  It just sees your wet nipples through the fucking... It's fucking weird. I got no defense for it. It just feels right. It's immediately see-through.

• 4:56Matt McCusker?

  So what, yeah, I remember I met my...

• 4:59Speaker 02

  In the waves in a wife beater is nuts.

• 5:03Matt McCusker?

  Just popping, just surfacing in a wave pool.

• 5:07Speaker 02

  At the bottom, the bottom gets all stretched out and baggy.

• 5:10Speaker 00

  You guys swim like it's the 1920s. Everyone's in full suits.

• 5:17Speaker 04

  Dude, I just, I was figuring out that yesterday. It's not, it's, it's crazy that white people made black people not be able to swim and then you guys make fun of us for it.

• 5:25Speaker 00

  We did not make it so you can't... You guys are blaming us for that too?

• 5:29Speaker 04

  You guys literally poured acid in the pool, dude.

• 5:31Matt McCusker?

  When did that happen?

• 5:32Speaker 04

  In the Jim Crow.

• 5:34Speaker 00

  Bro, if one or two things happened. That's like saying you guys make it so we can't go to gas stations. We still go.

• 5:41Speaker 00

  It's just a risk.

• 5:44Matt McCusker?

  But why would we acid our own pools?

• 5:46Speaker 00

  There was a couple of times where people were tossing it in.

• 5:48Speaker 02

  Some acid?

• 5:49Speaker 00

  Yeah, black people got in the pool and they're like, ah, ah, ah.

• 5:52Speaker 04

  It's a whites-only pool.

• 5:53Speaker 00

  Yeah, but that, that's not like, that wasn't like a fucking common occurrence.

• 5:57Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, there's lakes and shit, dude, like... We don't just swim in pools, dude. That's a fair point though, you know, but again, it's like, I don't know.

• 6:05Speaker 00

  I can't believe you tried to put not being able to swim on us.

• 6:08Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 6:09Speaker 00

  Although you could, you could. You could with urban, like, being forced into a city without pools. That's the one way you could do it.

• 6:16Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 6:19Speaker 00

  That is, that actually, I mean, you could if you wanted to find the root of all your problems with white people. You could.

• 6:28Speaker 00

  There is an argument, but swimming, come on, man.

• 6:30Speaker 02

  Yeah, take the, still take the ferry. Ferry's not that bad, expensive.

• 6:34Speaker 00

  Take the ferry?

• 6:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 6:35Speaker 00

  To what?

• 6:36Speaker 02

  Like in New York, you take the subway. Take the subway all the way to Coney Island.

• 6:39Speaker 00

  Oh, you're saying the beach. I was just talking like pools.

• 6:41Speaker 02

  Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, that's tough.

• 6:43Matt McCusker?

  I thought you were saying instead of black people swimming, they could take ferries. I was like, well, yeah, I'm sure.

• 6:46Speaker 00

  Yeah, of course. They can travel.

• 6:49Speaker 02

  It's pretty close. Get the breeze in your hair. There's probably some sand on there.

• 6:54Matt McCusker?

  Well, goddamn, I'm, you know, I don't want to tread into kind of divisive racial.

• 6:58Speaker 00

  Yeah. Matt, why don't you tell us what's going on with you?

• 7:01Matt McCusker?

  Dude.

• 7:01Speaker 00

  Cause you, that, you gotta be.

• 7:03Matt McCusker?

  Talking about.

• 7:03Speaker 00

  You gotta be, can't wait to talk about it.

• 7:05Matt McCusker?

  First of all, before I get to my sixty relative, about sixty-four hour fast.

• 7:09Speaker 00

  Who swallowed the canary? He's ready to talk.

• 7:12Matt McCusker?

  Speaking of, well, speaking of, uh, semi-related to cats, did you, I just found this out today. Do you know rats can't fart?

• 7:19Speaker 00

  No, I never would have.

• 7:20Matt McCusker?

  Rats cannot fart. We had an exterminator come to our house today, just routine treatment, and I told him about the cotton rats that invaded my garden. And he was like, oh, man, that sucks. And he came back with a bag of, it was like baking soda, apparently? And it's like an attractant, some, some other kind of food. And he was like, dude, put this in your, the back thing of the garden. He's like, it's non-toxic. It's kind of like a million dollar idea. I feel like the guy should patent it. I, I don't know if other people do this, but it's rat poison. But instead of being like a actually poisonous substance, it's baking soda, but it takes advantage of the fact that rats can't fart. So they eat baking soda, they just get filled with gas, and since they can't fart, they explode. Like literally, like a pigeon.

• 7:59Matt McCusker?

  Like a seagull, but that's Alka-Seltzer. But yeah, rats can't, and then they're, you're like, he's like, the only thing is you might catch a rat with like its side blown out running across your grass. Oh, man.

• 8:08Speaker 02

  My god.

• 8:09Speaker 00

  I would have never guessed that.

• 8:10Matt McCusker?

  Me either.

• 8:11Speaker 00

  You'd think they'd be able to.

• 8:12Matt McCusker?

  You think they'd fart the most?

• 8:14Speaker 02

  Yeah, also, how could, if you can poop, you can fart.

• 8:17Matt McCusker?

  But that's what you think, right? They can only shit, dude. They can only shit.

• 8:20Speaker 02

  Farts are just an air poop.

• 8:22Matt McCusker?

  They're probably peeing while they're.

• 8:23Speaker 00

  Google it after the guy said.

• 8:24Matt McCusker?

  I didn't even Google it. Dude, he's a fucking expert.

• 8:26Speaker 00

  I believe it, but.

• 8:27Matt McCusker?

  It's what the man does.

• 8:27Speaker 00

  Uh, Chris bought me with the, if you can poop, you can fart idea.

• 8:31Matt McCusker?

  Uh, you can't. That's the thing. That's a hu, that's like an opposable thumb.

• 8:34Speaker 02

  It's really just.

• 8:35Speaker 00

  Rats cannot fart. Yes, rats can fart.

• 8:38Matt McCusker?

  What?

• 8:40Matt McCusker?

  Fuck AI dude.

• 8:43Speaker 00

  Cause that sounds like it's a.

• 8:44Speaker 02

  If you can pass a turd, you can pass a fart.

• 8:47Speaker 00

  One year ago, today I learned that rats can fart.

• 8:50Matt McCusker?

  Mice don't fart.

• 8:53Matt McCusker?

  Hmm, okay, so maybe he's thinking what I showed him is actually technically a mouse.

• 8:57Speaker 02

  Why?

• 8:58Matt McCusker?

  That's tricky dude.

• 9:01Speaker 02

  Why can't that fart?

• 9:02Matt McCusker?

  So rats can fart, not mice.

• 9:04Speaker 00

  Yes, rats can pass gas. In fact, rats produce the most intestinal gas when fed dried skim milk.

• 9:10Speaker 02

  What?

• 9:11Speaker 00

  Get some milk going out there. Let the boys turn your garden into a fucking fart den.

• 9:15Matt McCusker?

  Here's the thing, this is the, the cotton rat looks more like a mouse than anything else. So maybe he like ID'd the species I gave him and was going, oh, that's like more of it. That's technically a mouse they refer to colloquially.

• 9:26Speaker 00

  Yeah, that looks like a mouse to me.

• 9:28Matt McCusker?

  Cotton rat? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It's a nice coat on. It's got a nice coat on it.

• 9:31Speaker 02

  I can see maybe the baking soda expands quickly in the stomach or something and blows him up.

• 9:35Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, okay, so may, we, you know, instant correction, I'm sorry to spread misinformation. Rats can fart, mice cannot.

• 9:42Speaker 00

  I believed you until Chris with the poop, but then it's still mice poop, so.

• 9:47Matt McCusker?

  Exactly, mice poop too. So mice, so mice can, a rat, a rat evolved from the mouse and they were, they literally were like, that was.

• 9:55Speaker 00

  It's time to fart.

• 9:55Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, it's time to fart. Sick of blowing the fuck up all the time out of nowhere thinking I'm just eating something yummy. But yeah dude, and that way if your dog, my dog already got into rat poison once, so that way he, if my dog ate that baking soda mixture.

• 10:07Speaker 00

  He's got a farting dog.

• 10:07Matt McCusker?

  So fart it out, you gotta fart a dog.

• 10:09Speaker 00

  Was Jackson already was a farting dog?

• 10:10Matt McCusker?

  He's already.

• 10:11Speaker 00

  How much worse could it get?

• 10:13Matt McCusker?

  Exactly, so, so yeah, I thought that was interesting.

• 10:16Speaker 00

  That's extremely interesting.

• 10:17Matt McCusker?

  So there we go. Mice can't fart, rats can. It's crazy.

• 10:21Speaker 02

  Is there a reason why? Is there anything about why they can't fart? How could you not be able to fart?

• 10:25Matt McCusker?

  Teeny tiny buttholes.

• 10:28Speaker 00

  Yeah, who knows?

• 10:29Matt McCusker?

  Rat has just a big enough butthole to blow out a fart.

• 10:32Speaker 00

  Or is a mouse? How come mice can't fart?

• 10:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, sure. Well, you'd think even just a, a mouse sized poop of a fart could get out there.

• 10:41Matt McCusker?

  It's just gotta be the way their bodies just can't.

• 10:43Speaker 00

  Mice can fart.

• 10:44Matt McCusker?

  What?

• 10:46Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 10:46Matt McCusker?

  Sean just said they can't.

• 10:47Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 10:48Matt McCusker?

  We gotta get our.

• 10:48Speaker 00

  The misconception that mice can't fart likely stems from the ideas that they can't burp or vomit to release gas, which is true. This is also AI. AI is.

• 10:58Speaker 00

  Who knows?

• 10:58Matt McCusker?

  Could be wrong, but I'll, I'll let you know if any of them explode. So maybe they can fart.

• 11:02Speaker 00

  I think any other, it says like any mammal, they can pass. I think every mammal can fart.

• 11:07Speaker 02

  I can't believe they can't puke. How could you not puke? I feel like that's one of the most important things that anything can do.

• 11:14Matt McCusker?

  Stomach is backwards. I don't know.

• 11:16Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 11:17Matt McCusker?

  I have no idea.

• 11:19Speaker 02

  But it's like, if it goes in, the body's gotta be able to like, we don't, we can't process this. It's gotta come out.

• 11:24Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 11:25Speaker 00

  It's actually a really terrible way to kill the guys, apparently.

• 11:28Matt McCusker?

  It happens.

• 11:28Speaker 00

  It just is extremely painful for the boys.

• 11:31Matt McCusker?

  Hey man, I know it's painful seeing all your arugula just go up one day. After you fucking, that hurts. I'm in an age old battle, dude.

• 11:40Matt McCusker?

  Farmer versus vermin. I don't want to hear that shit. They're lucky I don't stab them with a pitchfork.

• 11:44Speaker 00

  I forgot, I forgot. You've had a, you've had a lifetime of torturing these fuckers. This is nothing to you.

• 11:51Matt McCusker?

  I used to go out with my dad and blow up the voles. Smoke, put the smoke bomb. It'd be three holes, smoke bombs and two, and he would stand by the other hole with a nine millimeter and just fucking sock these things.

• 12:01Speaker 02

  Oh my God.

• 12:02Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. I watched my dad shoot a duck one time. I saw his eyeball go flying.

• 12:05Speaker 00

  Oh no, not a duck.

• 12:06Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, bro. He capped the duck.

• 12:07Speaker 02

  What?

• 12:08Matt McCusker?

  What was?

• 12:08Speaker 02

  I don't know, man. He's, oh, it was a fox fucked it up and he was putting it out to miss. It was a mercy kill.

• 12:12Speaker 00

  Good.

• 12:13Matt McCusker?

  But he had to, he sure kept the duck the one time. Yeah, bro. People were getting fucking plugged up, dude.

• 12:22Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I've seen a lot. I've seen a lot of murder, man. A lot of animal murder.

• 12:26Speaker 02

  A lot of murder?

• 12:27Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, interspecies murder. One time he squished him. This was, this actually stuck with me. We were in a barn and like a mouse ran into the corner of the barn and he just like took a work boot and just squished it. And I was like, oh, I was like a little kid. I was like, damn, that's so fucked up.

• 12:43Speaker 02

  I can see myself getting to that zone real quick.

• 12:47Speaker 02

  On a farm, on a farm.

• 12:49Matt McCusker?

  Dude, my whole crop, carrots, arugula, spinach, and I don't know what the other one was, maybe leeks. Just decimated all of them like two days.

• 12:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean, imagine if you came out and Mouse was like fucking with your Xbox all the time. You'd smash it with the.

• 13:04Speaker 02

  Every morning, half your Xbox was eaten and you kept having to plant new Xboxes.

• 13:09Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, you'd have to kill him.

• 13:12Speaker 02

  Yeah, man. It'd be sad, but you'd be there.

• 13:15Matt McCusker?

  You'd have to, bro. You know, fuck, what's my family gonna do if the shit hits the fan? I'm gonna need a half a pound of arugula, dude.

• 13:23Matt McCusker?

  I wanna do potatoes. That's, I was gonna do the carrots to kinda test the soil and then hit it with potato. I wanna just do potatoes and garlic, something I use a lot.

• 13:30Speaker 00

  You gotta get some tomatoes going too.

• 13:32Matt McCusker?

  I don't really fuck with tomatoes, bro.

• 13:33Speaker 00

  They're so good.

• 13:34Matt McCusker?

  Nah, dude, I don't know what it is. I'll eat salsa. I like that. I'll eat tomato sauce. Give me a raw tomato. I've tried.

• 13:40Speaker 00

  Fresh tomatoes are so good.

• 13:41Matt McCusker?

  I've tried them so many times. They make me just wanna throw up every time I try to bite a fresh tomato. I'm only, I know a lot of people like them.

• 13:47Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 13:48Speaker 02

  What about the little ones?

• 13:50Matt McCusker?

  Cherry tomatoes, ugh, don't like it either. I hate tomatoes, dude. I can't stand it. My kids don't like eating them either. And I'm always like, yeah, dude, you guys are fucking right. Those suck. Fuck those tomatoes. They don't taste like shit. This episode is brought to you by Mint Mobile.

• 14:04Speaker 00

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• 14:05Matt McCusker?

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• 14:41Speaker 00

  Incredible.

• 14:42Matt McCusker?

  Even if I get a tomato chunk in my spaghetti sauce, um, I'll like

• 14:46Speaker 02

  Yeah, when I was a kid.

• 14:47Speaker 00

  When I was a kid, I did not like tomatoes.

• 14:49Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, bro. She made chili recently and she used like, I, it's, I'm such a psycho about it. If she makes spaghetti, I, I make her blend the sauce. So there's no tomato chunks.

• 14:58Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 14:58Matt McCusker?

  I get so skeeved out.

• 14:59Speaker 00

  How about mushrooms? I don't like, I don't like mushrooms.

• 15:02Matt McCusker?

  I, I will eat there. I'll, I've cooked lion's mane mushrooms. I like them, but if mu- like button mushrooms come in my dish, I'll send it back. I don't like, like regular mushrooms. Lion's mane mushrooms by themselves, if you fry them up are actually pretty good. But other than that, I don't really fuck with that. Actually, I had a little incident in a restaurant recently. I had to be like, bro, uh.

• 15:21Speaker 00

  Not for me.

• 15:21Matt McCusker?

  Get these motherfucking mush- it was mushrooms in my dish.

• 15:23Speaker 02

  Did you put them to the side or did you send the whole thing back?

• 15:25Matt McCusker?

  I explicitly, if, if I don't know there's mushrooms and I order them, I'll pick them out myself, but I explicitly was like, no mushrooms. And they came out with mush and I was like, bruh. Just try to dose me, get these things the fuck out of here.

• 15:38Speaker 00

  Yeah, man.

• 15:39Speaker 02

  What y'all fools up to?

• 15:40Speaker 00

  I'm just thinking about your fast.

• 15:41Matt McCusker?

  Oh dude.

• 15:42Speaker 00

  I'd like to hear about it.

• 15:43Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I just literally, I would, so I was telling you, man, I think it's autophagy or autophagy. I don't know how you say it. If you don't eat for 24 hours, your body, um, first of all, you go into ketosis. So you're burning fat cells, you know, all that stuff. But after like, I think 24 hours of not eating any, I can't have anything.

• 15:59Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 16:00Matt McCusker?

  Your body goes into autophagy. So you start eating, your body starts like finding like old cells or any like fucked up cells. I think even cancer cells. And it just munches them. It starts just cleaning house of like anything in your body that's just time to go. And I did like 60, I think I did about like 60 hours of like a no food at all, just water and coffee. Dude, it's, I'm gonna try to start doing it every Sunday, just 24 hours. Eat five, 6pm on Saturday. Do, you know, doing stand up and then wake up that morning, just black coffee. And all you gotta do is make it to dinner time. It's not that hard to do 24 hours.

• 16:34Speaker 02

  It's getting awfully close to Judaism.

• 16:38Matt McCusker?

  Bro.

• 16:39Speaker 00

  Whoa, whoa, whoa, what the fuck?

• 16:45Matt McCusker?

  I just don't want, here's the thing, Chris. I don't wanna get old and have my kids be like, you didn't do everything you could to make it in the entertainment business. Why didn't you become Jewish? You know, I just wanna do everything.

• 16:56Speaker 00

  True.

• 16:58Matt McCusker?

  Fuck. You're a Christian like a dumbass.

• 17:01Speaker 02

  But I gotta do it on my terms.

• 17:06Speaker 02

  Slowly back in your way.

• 17:08Matt McCusker?

  Or, I mean, it's, it's kinda Muslim too, man, to not eat until sundown.

• 17:12Speaker 00

  Yeah. You should just hit Ramadan.

• 17:15Matt McCusker?

  That's what I'm saying. I actually might do a Ramadan.

• 17:17Speaker 00

  Just, no, I mean, when they do.

• 17:19Matt McCusker?

  Ooh, that'd be nice, man. I might. Actually, I've actually was always, when I went to the, remember the Green Eggs Cafe in Philadelphia? Come Ramadan, that was like a, like a, kind of like gentrified, like hipster breakfast place that got just like swarmed with black Muslims.

• 17:35Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 17:35Matt McCusker?

  The black Muslims found out about it and like every Ramadan would come in their gear and just shut it the fuck down. I was always like so jealous they had that. Like not, not the breakfast place, but they had Ramadan.

• 17:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:46Matt McCusker?

  It's always like, dude, I want that. I want like somebody to be taking me aside.

• 17:49Speaker 00

  Isn't there no water though, too, during the day?

• 17:51Matt McCusker?

  I don't know. There's no way, dude, in Muslim countries, they do no water.

• 17:54Speaker 00

  I swear.

• 17:54Matt McCusker?

  It's cap. That's turbid. That's turbid.

• 17:58Speaker 00

  It ain't turbid. I think you're not allowed to eat or drink while the sun's up.

• 18:01Matt McCusker?

  Really?

• 18:02Speaker 00

  I know.

• 18:03Matt McCusker?

  So they wake up early in the morning?

• 18:04Speaker 00

  They wake up before the sun comes up.

• 18:06Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 18:06Speaker 00

  And then you eat a big breakfast.

• 18:07Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 18:08Speaker 00

  But then, yeah, you're not allowed to drink during the day.

• 18:11Matt McCusker?

  I didn't know that.

• 18:12Speaker 00

  No water. I mean, unless you're sick or fucking traveling.

• 18:14Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 18:15Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 18:16Matt McCusker?

  Oh shit, I didn't know that.

• 18:17Speaker 00

  Yeah, so the no water would really suck ass.

• 18:20Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, it's also, you can do like a no water fast too, and like dry fasting, that fucks you up. I've done 24 hours of no water whatsoever and it's like, it's fu, it's kind of, I don't really recommend.

• 18:30Speaker 00

  Yeah, why'd you do that?

• 18:32Matt McCusker?

  I don't know. Say it's like a similar thing. It's like good for you just to dry out for a second. You do get kinda like cut too. If you go no water for 24 hours, you're, it's as ripped as you can possibly get.

• 18:41Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 18:41Matt McCusker?

  In that timeframe. But dude, I did 60 hours of fasting. I had a good like three days or so in autophagy, so I'm like feeling pretty good. Your mind, you get like, you do get like mental benefits.

• 18:53Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 18:54Matt McCusker?

  Like you're just calm. You are like, you're a little tense from not eating, like is it, it makes your body produce cortisol? But like dude, if say like, just say you're like in the kitchen with your wife first thing in the morning, you don't really love her attitude or whatever.

• 19:05Matt McCusker?

  She'll start and like, you're just like, you're, it's like irritating.

• 19:07Speaker 00

  She's talking to you and you're going, autophagy's in complete control. Normally the cells that would make me yell right now. I've been consumed by autophagy.

• 19:19Matt McCusker?

  But there's something, it does something to your mind and you're, you're kind of able to like, just kind of like-

• 19:24Speaker 00

  You got bigger fish to fry, dude. You're hungry as fuck.

• 19:27Matt McCusker?

  It's true. You're like, how could you possibly be making a thing about this? Like, I haven't eaten two fucking days.

• 19:32Speaker 00

  I'm starving.

• 19:33Matt McCusker?

  I supported you doing your juice fast.

• 19:35Speaker 00

  Can you imagine if a woman did this?

• 19:36Matt McCusker?

  I was trying to, I was trying to talk to her about it. They can't do it.

• 19:39Speaker 00

  They will kill you.

• 19:40Matt McCusker?

  They would, for real.

• 19:41Speaker 00

  How or two?

• 19:42Matt McCusker?

  That's, I know. Cause I've been trying to-

• 19:43Speaker 03

  We don't have anything to eat in the house, cause you, you motherfucker.

• 19:48Matt McCusker?

  Oh, that shit I bought? Yeah, you're right. My bad for eating that.

• 19:52Matt McCusker?

  Oh, that shit you were gonna leave in the fridge?

• 19:53Speaker 00

  You mean my stuff? You mean my thing that I, is mine?

• 19:57Matt McCusker?

  That meal you would have left in the fridge for seven days and thrown it out? Yeah, I'm sorry I ate that, man. My bad. On day five.

• 20:04Speaker 00

  And it sounds like you didn't waver. I would have wavered. I would have wavered pretty quick.

• 20:07Matt McCusker?

  Dude, I was making breakfast for the family in the morning. So I was like two days in, forty-eight hours in, just fried.

• 20:12Speaker 00

  When you were making breakfast, were you kind of like, goddamn, I'm in complete control?

• 20:15Matt McCusker?

  Yes.

• 20:16Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 20:16Matt McCusker?

  I've, I've, I didn't, I made pancakes one time and that like really fucked me up.

• 20:21Speaker 00

  Oh, fuck you. You just want to bite, dude. You're allowed to have a bite.

• 20:24Matt McCusker?

  You know me, you know me. I just want a bite, dude. I gotta test them to see if my recipe's still hitting.

• 20:28Speaker 00

  A little bit of the batter gets on your finger. That doesn't count.

• 20:31Matt McCusker?

  Yes, it does.

• 20:31Speaker 00

  That doesn't count.

• 20:32Matt McCusker?

  You won't be an autophagy, but you could still be keto.

• 20:34Speaker 00

  You can have seven pancakes. Doesn't count. You can have eighteen pancakes.

• 20:39Matt McCusker?

  Autophagy, keto, and then, you know, you get back down to it. But dude, I, it was sick, man. I'm gonna-

• 20:46Speaker 00

  Did you jack off?

• 20:47Matt McCusker?

  Did I jack off?

• 20:48Speaker 00

  Yeah, during the fast.

• 20:49Matt McCusker?

  I got caught jacking off.

• 20:52Speaker 00

  Did this lead to the hunger strike?

• 20:53Matt McCusker?

  No, no, no, no. I got caught like eight hours into the fast, jacking off in the shower. Oh, no.

• 21:01Speaker 00

  You can't be, you can't be hungry, you horny.

• 21:03Matt McCusker?

  I spun it though.

• 21:05Speaker 00

  Yeah, so I gotta get anything out.

• 21:06Matt McCusker?

  I was like, dude, I was just trying to be polite. I don't want to bother you. I spun it into some AZZ. Spun.

• 21:11Speaker 00

  Oh, nice.

• 21:11Matt McCusker?

  Wizardry, yeah.

• 21:12Speaker 00

  Yeah, just trying to be polite, didn't want to bother you. You're not allowed to eat the pussy.

• 21:15Matt McCusker?

  Didn't.

• 21:16Speaker 00

  You're fasting.

• 21:17Matt McCusker?

  You don't, you don't have a muscle, bro.

• 21:19Speaker 00

  You know I'm a Muslim, brother.

• 21:23Speaker 00

  No.

• 21:25Matt McCusker?

  Nah, yeah, it was, it was, we were getting around that time and, you know, that my Muslim brothers back in the day would have put her in her separate quarters too.

• 21:32Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 21:32Matt McCusker?

  So she was, she was nearing that crucial time. It's crazy. Women spend half of their life pre-menopause or, or their period, half their life. They're rocked from a period.

• 21:42Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 21:43Matt McCusker?

  Two weeks out of the month, bro.

• 21:45Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 21:46Matt McCusker?

  It's crazy.

• 21:47Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 21:48Matt McCusker?

  What are we doing with science, dude?

• 21:50Speaker 00

  I don't know. I think they have figured out a way to get rid of it, right?

• 21:52Matt McCusker?

  Birth control, but that makes it weirder in another way.

• 21:55Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah.

• 21:56Matt McCusker?

  Makes them just like cry.

• 21:56Speaker 00

  Pick your poison, dude.

• 21:57Matt McCusker?

  They're kind of fucked, dude.

• 21:59Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 21:59Matt McCusker?

  Like I'm, that book I'm reading about the girls disappearing and the men disappearing from the girls. It makes you like, it, it is a thing. Like dude, it would be so sad if all the girls disappeared. That's the whole point. It's like, it'd be so sad, even though like they're on some bullshit a lot of the time.

• 22:13Speaker 00

  Yeah, think about like year, year two.

• 22:16Matt McCusker?

  They do come out with the sex robots in the book. It's really funny.

• 22:20Speaker 00

  Year two? Come on, man.

• 22:21Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, they'd be, the sex robots came out pretty quickly. You can pull, you can plug, this was written like the 50s. You can plug them into the wall, keep them hot. But then there was the boy.

• 22:28Speaker 00

  If all the women disappeared, there would be, yeah, that Kennedy speech. Why choose to go to the moon? Why choose this as our goal? It would be, oh yeah. The speed at which sex robots would be.

• 22:44Matt McCusker?

  Oh, yeah.

• 22:45Speaker 00

  Up to speed is unbelievable.

• 22:47Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, we'd be like Elon, stop with all the fucking spaceships and shit.

• 22:50Speaker 00

  He needs to stop anyway, dude. I'm fed up. I'm sick of it, dude.

• 22:54Matt McCusker?

  King nerd, king autist. Although Kanye's claiming autism too now. It's kind of the power move. You're a billionaire, be like, oh, by the way, I'm autistic. So if I do like not do shit, I'm a fool.

• 23:01Speaker 00

  Kanye claimed autism, uh, when he first got in trouble.

• 23:04Matt McCusker?

  Did he?

• 23:06Speaker 00

  He was a Jewish doctor. There was a clip during that time. He's wearing like a ski mask and a bubble vest, just like, I don't know, I might be autistic.

• 23:16Speaker 00

  Yeah, bro. Or he got dinged up in that car accident in his head.

• 23:20Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, true.

• 23:21Speaker 00

  I think it's his head from the car accident.

• 23:23Matt McCusker?

  That's fair. That's a good point.

• 23:24Speaker 00

  Kind of got a little rowdy ever since then.

• 23:27Matt McCusker?

  That makes sense.

• 23:28Speaker 00

  But that was right when he got famous too, so.

• 23:29Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, it's hard to say, but it is a nice move.

• 23:31Speaker 00

  Fame in a, in a wild traumatic brain injury.

• 23:36Speaker 00

  That'll lead you to Hitler.

• 23:37Matt McCusker?

  True.

• 23:38Speaker 00

  Eventually you go, fucking Hitler, it's cool.

• 23:42Matt McCusker?

  Truly the forbidden fruit.

• 23:43Speaker 00

  Bryce Mitchell, yeah, I saw Bryce Mitchell.

• 23:45Matt McCusker?

  Bryce came out, yeah. It's so funny for Dana White.

• 23:49Speaker 00

  It's embarrassing how, yeah. Yeah, that was an embarrassing moment.

• 23:52Matt McCusker?

  It's so funny for Dana White having to like corral a bunch of UFC fighters, press like releases. It's so funny. Like Dana, what do you think about the guy who thinks Hitler's cool? He's gotta be like, which one are you talking about? I have.

• 24:02Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 24:03Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. I have 10 of those guys.

• 24:06Speaker 00

  Yeah, there's a lot of them.

• 24:10Speaker 00

  Yeah, I saw it. It was great. He was like, he's the dumbest guy I've ever talked to.

• 24:15Speaker 00

  It's actually a nice fucking, that's a good thing to have your boss go out and be like, look, he's a fucking moron. I'm not gonna fire him. He's a dumbass.

• 24:24Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 24:24Speaker 00

  Who cares?

• 24:25Matt McCusker?

  I mean, he's a classic, he's a classic victim to a YouTube documentary. He watched it and was like, oh my God, I'm the carrier of the truth. I must.

• 24:32Speaker 00

  Yeah, I mean, that clip started, he's like, cause I've done my own research, not what the government indoctrinated me with.

• 24:38Matt McCusker?

  It just happened to Dan Blazarian, didn't it? Didn't?

• 24:40Speaker 00

  Blazarian's been on it.

• 24:41Matt McCusker?

  He's been on that?

• 24:42Speaker 00

  He's, Israel Palestine kicked it off and he's, he's been real. Israel Palestine took a nasty little turn for me last night.

• 24:49Matt McCusker?

  What happened?

• 24:49Speaker 00

  I was watching the live, I watched the Netanyahu Trump press conference live.

• 24:54Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 24:56Speaker 00

  You better get your boy in check, dude.

• 24:57Matt McCusker?

  What happened? Who's, well, first of all, who's my boy? You say Netanyahu, I'm gonna flip the table.

• 25:01Speaker 00

  No, no, no.

• 25:06Matt McCusker?

  Certain fast on Sundays.

• 25:10Matt McCusker?

  I've had enough!

• 25:11Speaker 00

  We're talking about your homeland.

• 25:13Matt McCusker?

  Fast is all.

• 25:14Speaker 00

  We're talking about your homeland.

• 25:16Matt McCusker?

  Fair, that's fair, that's fair. That is my leader Netanyahu, like it or not, you know?

• 25:21Speaker 00

  No, your boy Donnie T got a little. He said we're gonna just take over Gaza.

• 25:26Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 25:26Speaker 00

  In a press conference, he was like, America's just gonna take over Gaza and we're gonna make it really nice. We're gonna make it the Riviera of the Mediterranean.

• 25:33Matt McCusker?

  Oh, yeah, I saw something on X.

• 25:34Speaker 00

  Well, I guess the Riviera's on the Mediterranean.

• 25:35Matt McCusker?

  I saw the X, I know what you mean though. I saw the X about that, about.

• 25:38Speaker 00

  No, I watched him say it.

• 25:39Matt McCusker?

  Really?

• 25:39Speaker 00

  Yeah, he was like, we're just gonna take over Gaza.

• 25:41Matt McCusker?

  And it's gonna be nice.

• 25:42Speaker 00

  And they're like, what about all the people there? He's like, they're not gonna be there. We're gonna make them go to Jordan and Egypt. And then they can come back, it'll be nice. It's like.

• 25:50Matt McCusker?

  Hold up, what if it does kinda rule when they come back?

• 25:54Matt McCusker?

  Like you come back, dude.

• 25:55Speaker 00

  Long thought of it.

• 25:56Matt McCusker?

  Just a gravitron on the beach?

• 25:57Speaker 00

  Yeah. It is better. A couple of sunshots.

• 26:02Speaker 02

  Standing there doing some soul searching. Maybe it was us.

• 26:06Matt McCusker?

  Pirate ship going like this and mini golf.

• 26:08Speaker 00

  I agree. But, uh.

• 26:11Matt McCusker?

  No, that's, that's pretty gassy dude.

• 26:13Speaker 00

  Yeah, what the fuck is he talking about? No water socks. No.

• 26:18Speaker 00

  This is American territory now.

• 26:19Matt McCusker?

  Damn, also too, it's Ramadan, you're on the water slide, you gotta keep your lips pursed.

• 26:23Speaker 00

  I think they swim in full fucking white pajamas.

• 26:26Matt McCusker?

  I think so.

• 26:26Speaker 02

  Oh, they might, yeah.

• 26:28Matt McCusker?

  I think so. Yeah, that's pretty, that's pretty wicked, man.

• 26:30Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's crazy.

• 26:31Matt McCusker?

  Kick them off and then, uh, you know, cause then it's like you get down to like, well, who's, like, he started it. It's like, well, you know, let's just assume you guys both committed sins. Being like, yo, we're gonna ma- it's funny to be like, we're gonna, you know, essentially genocide and war. And then be like, but it's gonna be so sick when we're done. It's gonna be so cool.

• 26:51Speaker 00

  He was, he did, he just has the most basic ideas that technically he's like, we can't go back to what we're doing. Cause it's not gonna work. If we just go with the two-state solution right now, it's gonna be a war again.

• 27:03Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 27:03Speaker 00

  And then, I mean, I don't know.

• 27:06Matt McCusker?

  One cool step.

• 27:06Speaker 00

  But it was, it was bad, yeah. I wish he didn't say that.

• 27:09Matt McCusker?

  Yep. He's always been down, Trump's been down with Israel since day one, there's no.

• 27:14Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 27:15Matt McCusker?

  Self-full and if you do.

• 27:16Speaker 00

  I don't think there's a politician in America that's not.

• 27:18Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. Yeah.

• 27:19Speaker 00

  Other than, yeah.

• 27:21Matt McCusker?

  Bernie, is Bernie, now Bernie's obviously, sweet swag, yeah.

• 27:25Speaker 00

  Bernie's obviously.

• 27:28Speaker 02

  He's conflicted.

• 27:30Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, is there Omar, Omar Ilia, whatever that lady's name is.

• 27:33Speaker 00

  Yeah. The squad's anti.

• 27:35Matt McCusker?

  It's Kazi, yeah, Kaziya. But my, yeah, I don't know, man. I mean, here's the thing, they have been fighting each other forever. It is none of my business. That's truly none of my business.

• 27:45Speaker 00

  That is my opinion. Let's stay out of this.

• 27:49Matt McCusker?

  None of my business, um, I'll never go there to either place, so, you know.

• 27:53Speaker 02

  You don't know that yet.

• 27:55Speaker 00

  I know, if Trump turns that thing around.

• 27:56Speaker 02

  Yeah. True.

• 27:59Matt McCusker?

  Oh, like a Dubai, like cruise, you can go to Dubai and then there. Damn, I can get my Instagram like fucking turbine like sheik shot.

• 28:08Speaker 00

  It is.

• 28:08Matt McCusker?

  Now, now this is all making sense.

• 28:10Speaker 00

  It's a really small area and it could get it done.

• 28:13Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 28:14Speaker 00

  But, you know, it would.

• 28:15Matt McCusker?

  Where are they gonna go though?

• 28:16Speaker 00

  You have to displace two million people.

• 28:17Matt McCusker?

  Where are they going? Didn't they already like bomb that whole area though?

• 28:20Speaker 00

  They killed a lot, yeah, the whole thing's fucked.

• 28:21Speaker 02

  It would be nuts if all the tunnels turned into like cool rides.

• 28:25Speaker 00

  Donkey Kong roller coasters?

• 28:26Matt McCusker?

  Shit.

• 28:28Speaker 00

  Minecart roller coasters?

• 28:29Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I thought of that. Subterranean log flume?

• 28:34Matt McCusker?

  You see her like you see a light like, help, well, shit the fuck is that?

• 28:40Speaker 00

  You might hit some Jewish tunnels as well.

• 28:42Matt McCusker?

  True. What if they ever bump into each other underground?

• 28:44Speaker 00

  Probably.

• 28:50Matt McCusker?

  These are our tunnels.

• 28:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, once you're a little baking soda down there. Oh my god.

• 28:57Matt McCusker?

  Chris?

• 28:59Speaker 00

  Yo, Chris?

• 29:02Matt McCusker?

  I knew you were right wing when you grew that goatee dude. I knew you were right wing.

• 29:08Speaker 02

  I'm sorry.

• 29:09Matt McCusker?

  I knew you were right wing.

• 29:11Speaker 00

  Yo.

• 29:13Matt McCusker?

  That's funny, no, that's hilarious.

• 29:15Speaker 02

  I didn't.

• 29:16Speaker 00

  Yeah, you did.

• 29:16Speaker 02

  It wasn't clear, to be fair, it wasn't clear. They can fart, I don't know.

• 29:19Matt McCusker?

  Wasn't, did he?

• 29:21Speaker 00

  Jews, Jews can fart.

• 29:25Speaker 00

  Jews can hit you with.

• 29:29Matt McCusker?

  I will say it's not a good, it's not a good, uh, if you're like part of a group that like has to travel secretly underground, it's not a good look.

• 29:35Speaker 00

  It is a bad.

• 29:36Matt McCusker?

  No matter how you slice it, cartels, super Jews and Muslims.

• 29:41Speaker 00

  Sometimes there's cool ones. You got like French Resistance.

• 29:45Matt McCusker?

  Okay.

• 29:45Speaker 00

  Occupied Germany.

• 29:46Matt McCusker?

  No, yeah, you're right, but it's still.

• 29:47Speaker 00

  You know what I mean, but for the most part, yeah.

• 29:49Matt McCusker?

  It's just, all I'm saying is it means you got a lot of drama going on.

• 29:51Speaker 00

  There's a lot of drama on the surface. If, if your drama is so intense that you can't be on the surface of the earth. You're fucking, you're in trouble.

• 30:02Speaker 00

  The surface is too hot. We're gonna have to go underground for a few.

• 30:08Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, bro. There's truly that much smoke? It sucks, dude.

• 30:11Speaker 00

  The ops are everywhere.

• 30:15Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, true. Did Trump talk about how oppy it was over there?

• 30:17Speaker 00

  He said it's been real oppy outside. He said he checked the weather. It's getting real oppy outside in Gaza.

• 30:24Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I mean, dude, my thing is like, I get it. It's not right. They went through and like, you know, they got attacked. That sucks. I'd be pissed. If I was in Israel, I'd be like, fuck you. They attacked me. If someone tried to do like to take away the terrorist hunting permits after nine 11, you'd be like, get the fuck, get fucked, dude.

• 30:37Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 30:38Matt McCusker?

  So I get that, but it's like, yeah, once you run up the score so hard, it's like, I mean, we kind of did it. We did this.

• 30:44Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 30:44Matt McCusker?

  You know what I'm saying? I don't know if it was as concentrated. I don't know. Wasn't there. But.

• 30:49Speaker 00

  Yeah, I don't think we're bombing civilians at such a high rate.

• 30:52Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, true. Well, I mean, hopefully we're at least trying not to do that, but. Yeah, dude.

• 30:57Speaker 00

  They say they're not.

• 30:58Matt McCusker?

  I just hope they stop it, dude. I hope the fucking, you know, resort. It's crazy to come out with it and be like, the resort's gonna be so fucking sick.

• 31:05Speaker 00

  I know. He was like, I mean, I don't want to be, I don't want to say the wrong thing, but it's gonna be so nice.

• 31:11Matt McCusker?

  Did he?

• 31:11Speaker 00

  He was like, of course, the people, but also it's gonna be so nice. Dude, I watched the whole thing. He's nuts. I mean, it's fun to watch if he's not talking about, you know, kind of a genocide.

• 31:22Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 31:23Speaker 00

  If he's not talking about ethnic cleansing, it's really fun.

• 31:25Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 31:28Matt McCusker?

  I mean, he might just be the ultimate optimist.

• 31:30Speaker 00

  He's being really optimistic about it.

• 31:32Matt McCusker?

  Really rose tinned and glassy. Like, look, guys, I know this is sad. You know, you've seen the footage, but.

• 31:38Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:39Speaker 02

  What was the plan for getting him out? By boat?

• 31:42Speaker 00

  He wouldn't really answer.

• 31:43Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:43Speaker 00

  He's, because Jordan and Egypt both said they wouldn't take Palestinians. And he was like, I bet they will. So that was his answer for that.

• 31:52Matt McCusker?

  I mean, that's a fair point.

• 31:53Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 31:54Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. Ah, yeah, but dude, they're gonna attack the park.

• 31:58Speaker 00

  They're gonna attack the park.

• 31:59Matt McCusker?

  If you build a sick fucking park.

• 32:02Speaker 00

  They're gonna attack the cool park.

• 32:03Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, tax again. The park's getting fucked up. I would not.

• 32:06Speaker 00

  I'm not going to the Six Flags in Gaza.

• 32:08Matt McCusker?

  No.

• 32:11Speaker 00

  Getting attacked while you're on a roller coaster, not for me.

• 32:14Matt McCusker?

  Dude, you're just cooling in a lazy river. Peeing in a lazy river dudes.

• 32:19Speaker 00

  Drunk peeing in a lazy river.

• 32:21Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, no, not, not happening. We'll see, maybe in fifty, maybe they're thinking about like in fifty years or so.

• 32:27Speaker 00

  Yeah, it would take at least, yeah, it would take forever.

• 32:30Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 32:31Speaker 00

  But, uh.

• 32:31Matt McCusker?

  I will say occupying a six flag with your boys would be sick. Taking it over.

• 32:38Speaker 00

  Yeah, there's footage of that, like of like when Taliban came back, they got a hold of some, remember that? They were riding like duck boats in ponds and shit, they were dancing.

• 32:46Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 32:47Speaker 00

  It did look like a good time, AK forty sevens and duck boats. Yeah, T-Cops, they're having a good time.

• 32:56Matt McCusker?

  We've left an amusement vacuum in the Middle East.

• 32:59Speaker 00

  It's our vacuum, so somebody awful is gonna get on this ride.

• 33:07Matt McCusker?

  The games are frankly impossible and I think they're rigged.

• 33:10Speaker 00

  Yeah, but he was talking about sending our, our boys over there.

• 33:13Matt McCusker?

  Ah, no.

• 33:15Speaker 00

  Can't do it.

• 33:16Matt McCusker?

  No.

• 33:16Speaker 00

  What are we talking about? That's why he, the whole point of electing him was to not send our guys overseas.

• 33:21Matt McCusker?

  I know. That'd be some bull.

• 33:22Speaker 00

  Day fucking twenty.

• 33:24Matt McCusker?

  He's supposed to be peacemaker dude. I know, I know Mexico now sending people to the border to like.

• 33:29Speaker 00

  Yeah. Secure it.

• 33:31Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. I mean, he's a peacemaker, but at his heart, he's a real estate developer, you know? You gotta, you gotta. That's, that was the take I heard. You see a good piece of property. That was the take I heard on X.

• 33:41Speaker 00

  It's for real what he's talking about. He's like, it's the best piece of property in the world.

• 33:46Matt McCusker?

  All the mistakes he made in Atlantic City will be undone in the Gaza Strip.

• 33:51Speaker 00

  I mean, he could. For real, there is, that's the other part. Like I was like, I was watching it and I was like, no. Don't say that, you fucking idiot. And then I went and floated in my pool. I was like, damn, if he fucking gets peace in the Middle East and a sick ass fucking.

• 34:08Matt McCusker?

  Like a scandal?

• 34:09Speaker 00

  Just and a thing that America own, like he was like, we're not gonna give it up. It's something we can, it's, it would just be a territory or something?

• 34:16Matt McCusker?

  Hear me out, hold on, now, i- if America steps in and goes, it's neither of yours, alright?

• 34:20Speaker 00

  Well, no, that's for real what the plan is.

• 34:22Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 34:24Speaker 00

  But seeing Netanyahu sitting right next to him like.

• 34:28Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. That's a bad sign.

• 34:30Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's definitely yours. Yeah, yeah. It's definitely not absolutely ours.

• 34:34Matt McCusker?

  Sex tape behind his back.

• 34:37Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's yours. Here's a video of you and a child. We got an Epstein's house. Are you sure that's yours?

• 34:44Matt McCusker?

  And we're gonna lease that off you for a very reasonable rate. Yeah, dude. Dude, I.

• 34:49Speaker 00

  Give me the Panama Canal, though. Give it back.

• 34:52Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, that's ours.

• 34:53Speaker 00

  Gibbs.

• 34:54Matt McCusker?

  Did you ever get into, I could be wrong about this, but did you know like the Panama Canal, like apparently there was like, people were just like machine gunned off of that land before that became a thing?

• 35:04Speaker 00

  That makes sense.

• 35:04Matt McCusker?

  I've heard that was like a ruthless one.

• 35:06Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 35:07Speaker 02

  Before we built it?

• 35:08Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 35:08Speaker 00

  I think the Panamanians went in there and got a little rowdy on them.

• 35:11Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I think so.

• 35:12Speaker 00

  And they were like, thanks, fellows.

• 35:13Matt McCusker?

  Thanks, guys. Now our ships can go this way.

• 35:16Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 35:17Matt McCusker?

  Pretty ruthless.

• 35:17Speaker 02

  Yeah. You get 1% of every ship that.

• 35:23Matt McCusker?

  Thanks for committing an atrocity on our behalf.

• 35:25Speaker 02

  Needed to be done, though.

• 35:27Matt McCusker?

  Could be wrong about that, but I've heard, I think Spud told me, Spud was like, the Panama Canal was bloody.

• 35:31Speaker 00

  Yeah. And how many people died making it? Wasn't, didn't like everyone die?

• 35:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, they were all getting sick. There, I think there was like a lot of malaria kind of stuff going on. I know they had to send a guy down to be like, alright, we're not doing anything until we get some tents with mosquito nets going.

• 35:47Matt McCusker?

  Eesh. How many? Died making the canal?

• 35:52Speaker 00

  Yeah. Most, were they mostly Panamanian?

• 35:57Speaker 00

  Were they Panamaniacs?

• 35:59Speaker 02

  But what was the average, what was the average savings on transporting goods?

• 36:05Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah. Chris, now we're talking money over human life, and I love it.

• 36:10Matt McCusker?

  You know?

• 36:12Matt McCusker?

  Fair point.

• 36:12Speaker 00

  No, but it's the nice idea to be like, oh, we should give it to Panama. It's in their land or whatever. China just immediately took it over. Soon as we were like Panama, you can have it. Contracts straight to China.

• 36:22Matt McCusker?

  What?

• 36:23Speaker 00

  Yeah, bro.

• 36:24Matt McCusker?

  That's some bullshit. They get it back.

• 36:25Speaker 00

  Give it back. We built it.

• 36:26Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 36:26Speaker 02

  Gulf of America and the American Canal.

• 36:28Speaker 00

  Gulf of America, which didn't sound as embarrassing until he was like, Gaza's ours too. You go, bah.

• 36:35Speaker 00

  Damn it, dude. I thought you were just being funny.

• 36:39Matt McCusker?

  Apparently, they really changed it. It is the Gulf of America.

• 36:41Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 36:43Matt McCusker?

  I, I mean, I guess that's just on our maps.

• 36:44Speaker 00

  Google Maps has to do it.

• 36:45Matt McCusker?

  Oh, Google did it.

• 36:46Speaker 00

  Google's gonna do it.

• 36:47Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, true.

• 36:48Speaker 00

  It makes literally no difference at all.

• 36:50Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, that's right. Is, yeah, do you have to file like a formal, is there like a document?

• 36:54Speaker 00

  I think he just signed it probably on the desk where he.

• 36:57Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 36:59Matt McCusker?

  That's so fucking funny.

• 37:00Speaker 00

  Next.

• 37:01Matt McCusker?

  Didn't he sign, uh, like bills in an arena? I heard he did a thing in an arena where he signed bills in an arena. It's just so fucking funny, dude.

• 37:11Speaker 02

  The marker comes down from the ceiling.

• 37:15Speaker 00

  Boxing announcer?

• 37:20Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. It's getting wild, dude. Have better sex with BlueChew. BlueChew is the original brand offering chewable tablets. These erection-enhancing tablets help men achieve stronger, harder, and longer-lasting erections for sexual activities.

• 37:36Speaker 00

  Only for sexual activities.

• 37:37Matt McCusker?

  Only for sexual activities. BlueChew is putting its money where, not for doctor's visits, BlueChew is putting its money where its mouth is.

• 37:45Speaker 00

  Mm-hmm.

• 37:46Matt McCusker?

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• 38:13Speaker 00

  Ooh.

• 38:14Matt McCusker?

  The best part? It's all done online. That means no visits to the doctor's office, no awkward conversations, and no waiting in line at the pharmacy.

• 38:22Speaker 00

  Personal experience? I've, I've taken them. Got a giant, rock-hard boner.

• 38:27Matt McCusker?

  Did you really?

• 38:27Speaker 00

  Yep.

• 38:28Matt McCusker?

  I've heard people say it's the hardest they've ever gotten.

• 38:30Speaker 00

  Yeah, it was the hardest I've ever gotten.

• 38:32Matt McCusker?

  That's sick. That's what we need.

• 38:35Speaker 00

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• 38:35Matt McCusker?

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• 38:38Speaker 00

  I would've had a daughter.

• 38:40Speaker 00

  Let's put it that way.

• 38:42Matt McCusker?

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• 38:59Speaker 00

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• 39:25Matt McCusker?

  Wow.

• 39:27Speaker 00

  Let me talk you through it. I just hop on the app and I'll obviously pick the Mahomes free pick. Well, I ain't. And then we all know, I shared my secret that I make the best picks. Or I make my picks based on the best looking players. So I'll tack on Saquon Barkley because duh, those legs don't miss to score one touchdown. And I'll add Jalen Hurts, the best looking quarterback with the shiniest chain in the league to score one touchdown, then submit my lineup. In your iconic Trump voice. Boom, done. Easy as that. Fly Eagles, fly. Join me in the fun this Sunday. We're gonna have big runs, big scores, and obviously big buckets of brewskis. You can't forget the brewskis and hopefully a big win on PrizePix. Combine up to six picks.

• 40:12Speaker 00

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• 40:34Matt McCusker?

  What do you think about them sexualizing those two black men?

• 40:36Speaker 00

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• 40:52Matt McCusker?

  Woo.

• 40:54Speaker 00

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• 40:57Matt McCusker?

  Wow. Great. Dania Beach, Florida, please come. It'll be too late by the time you see this, but you better get the fuck out of there.

• 41:05Speaker 00

  Dania, get there.

• 41:06Matt McCusker?

  And go to MattMcCusker.com for tickets for all the other places.

• 41:08Speaker 00

  Thank you.

• 41:11Speaker 00

  Manchester, England.

• 41:16Matt McCusker?

  St Pete Las Vegas Shangri Didi.com. Thank you. God bless you.

• 41:19Speaker 00

  That was a unfortunate timing for the anti DEI people.

• 41:23Matt McCusker?

  Oh, yeah.

• 41:23Speaker 00

  Helicopter pilot.

• 41:24Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, dude. That was pretty well, dude, I was like talking about this yesterday. So there was like Trump side was like, well, you guys did all this DEI bullshit. That's why we have a helicopter crashing into the plane. And they were like, well, Trump allegedly, they're saying he dis uh disbanded the head of the FAA. And then like, that's why things are crashing. But I'm like, bro, you're telling me the guy, there's a multi thousand person organization. That if you remove the president, planes start crashing. Like, how the fuck does that work?

• 41:53Speaker 00

  Yeah, that's not it.

• 41:53Matt McCusker?

  Makes no sense.

• 41:54Speaker 00

  No, it definitely doesn't make sense.

• 41:55Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, it's like they're like, well, he he did that and it fucked everything up. It's like, bro, please.

• 41:59Speaker 02

  That footage is weird too.

• 42:01Matt McCusker?

  Bro.

• 42:01Speaker 00

  It's weird footage.

• 42:02Speaker 02

  And that and they they were talking to him, right? Didn't they try to go like, hey?

• 42:06Speaker 00

  Quiet for a while. Yeah.

• 42:07Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 42:08Speaker 00

  The helicopter was quiet.

• 42:10Matt McCusker?

  I heard. I don't know if this is true. Someone told me that helicopter was black ops. Like not like trying to hit the plane. That's what I'm saying. But that was like part of a black op operation.

• 42:19Speaker 02

  You gotta land the Black Hawk and restart your headset.

• 42:21Matt McCusker?

  Black helicopter checks out, so.

• 42:23Speaker 00

  I don't know. Why would it be black ops?

• 42:24Matt McCusker?

  I don't know. There was like running a drill of like how like transport.

• 42:27Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 42:27Matt McCusker?

  Like it was part of like a thing that wasn't like tapped in with the FAA.

• 42:30Speaker 00

  Yeah, that makes sense. They were talking to him though. I yeah, listen to the audio on Jones.

• 42:35Matt McCusker?

  And what was it? They were like, yo, what are you doing?

• 42:37Speaker 00

  They were just kind of like, hey.

• 42:38Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 42:39Speaker 00

  What are you doing?

• 42:39Matt McCusker?

  Like four minutes before they hit, they were like, hey, you fuck you doing?

• 42:43Speaker 02

  What are you doing?

• 42:44Speaker 00

  Yeah, they're like, the plane has the right of way. You gotta chill.

• 42:47Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. How the fuck did that happen? And then the plane crashed in Philly? That was crazy, dude. I had to fly that weekend. Oh, shit.

• 42:55Speaker 00

  Yeah, I had to fly the next day. I had to fly the next day. We were on a plane just going. If it goes down like that, though, those people didn't feel a fucking thing. That was a missile. They passed out in the sky for sure. That thing was going fucking nine million miles an hour.

• 43:14Matt McCusker?

  Oh yeah, I saw that.

• 43:15Speaker 00

  Who?

• 43:17Matt McCusker?

  Philly just got crashed.

• 43:17Speaker 00

  No, he didn't survive the crash. That was somebody who got hit.

• 43:19Matt McCusker?

  He got crashed on. Yeah, he got hit with the debris.

• 43:22Speaker 00

  If that guy survived that plane crash and walked out, that's a superhero, dude. You saw a superhero.

• 43:30Speaker 00

  Cause you gotta, did you see how fast that thing went down?

• 43:33Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, that was a bomb. It like blew up in the air.

• 43:36Speaker 00

  Yeah, it was going too fast.

• 43:39Matt McCusker?

  We finally found Unbreakable.

• 43:42Speaker 00

  I mean.

• 43:43Matt McCusker?

  No, everyone was way dead on that plane. The fucking explosion was crazy. Yeah, all that in one week was like, what the fuck?

• 43:51Speaker 00

  Yeah, it was scary getting on a plane.

• 43:54Matt McCusker?

  And it was, it's crazy to be, yeah, dude.

• 43:55Speaker 00

  It's when I took the bottle on the flight back.

• 43:57Matt McCusker?

  I bet.

• 43:57Speaker 00

  And it was a bad, bad Monday.

• 44:00Matt McCusker?

  Really?

• 44:01Speaker 00

  Great Sunday on the flight back.

• 44:02Matt McCusker?

  At least you didn't crash.

• 44:03Speaker 00

  True.

• 44:04Matt McCusker?

  Fucking.

• 44:04Speaker 00

  You get enough vodka up there, you go, yeah, fuck it.

• 44:08Matt McCusker?

  It started manifesting a safe landing. It manifested a safe landing. You just manifested a safe landing. Yeah, I would, I was scared. I, I had to fly and do like connections and it was just like four flights total in a weekend. I was just like, bro, please, for the love of God.

• 44:22Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 44:22Matt McCusker?

  Feel a little turbulence, you go, yep, here it is. They got me. Fuck. Fuck. This episode is brought to you by AG1. Dude, real quick, gotta tell you guys about this.

• 44:32Speaker 00

  I like this.

• 44:32Matt McCusker?

  I like that too. AG1, the healthy stuff I've been drinking recently. Still just one scoop, once a day, vitamins, minerals, probiotics. All this stuff my actual diet doesn't provide. Mix is great. Doesn't taste like a fistfight. Package travel easily if you're on the road doing shows or just too lazy to measure anything out, which dude, come on. They also recently came out with AG1 Pro, the same foundation, but with creatine in one simple delicious drink. So if you're someone who trains a lot or wants to get more impact out of your stack, this one might be worth checking out. So hurry up and go to drink AG1.com slash secret pod and for a limited time only get

• 45:15Matt McCusker?

  a free immune support bundle, including omega three, fish oil and vitamin D three plus K2 with your first subscription to AG1 next gen or AG1 pro. That's drink AG1.com slash secret pod. This episode is brought to you by Viori.

• 45:29Speaker 00

  Oh, yeah.

• 45:30Matt McCusker?

  I've been wearing the Sunday performance joggers and I'll be honest, I didn't expect to have opinions about joggers, but I do.

• 45:36Speaker 00

  Oh, I know you do.

• 45:37Matt McCusker?

  Well, they're soft, lightweight and have four way stretch. So they can move with you with no restriction. They're technically workout clothes. So you can train in them, but they don't look like workout clothes. You can wear them out and people will think you've got your life together. Honestly, they're comfier than whatever you're wearing right now, unless you're already wearing Viori, in which case, respect.

• 46:00Speaker 00

  And with the holidays coming up, Viori makes gift giving easy. Uh, I was close to that. Uh, whether it's the Sunday collection or the strato collection, their best sellers are go to gifts for everyone on your list, including yourself. Get 20% off your first purchase at Viori.com slash secret and discover the versatility of Viori clothing. Exclusions apply. Visit the website for full terms and conditions. We saw some eagles. That was nice. We took a bus from Seattle to Vancouver. We drove there or Vancouver to Seattle. Saw like 10, 10 bald eagles.

• 46:32Speaker 03

  Like an actual flock of bald eagles.

• 46:33Speaker 00

  Yeah, it was awesome.

• 46:34Matt McCusker?

  Fucking sick.

• 46:36Speaker 00

  I told my lady about it and she was like, oh, is this like when you saw the drone? I was like, oh, you saw the drone with me. Are you telling me you were lying?

• 46:43Matt McCusker?

  Whoa, that's crazy.

• 46:45Speaker 00

  Yeah, you saw the drone.

• 46:47Matt McCusker?

  I saw the drone. The drone was there.

• 46:49Speaker 00

  It was a real drone.

• 46:50Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 46:50Speaker 00

  I even called Chris a week later to go, did you actually think it was a drone or were you just being nice to me when I said it was a drone? He was like, what the fuck are you talking about? I was like, all right, just making sure you weren't just being nice. Cause I've been running my mouth about this drone. I've been sitting out in that fucking pool every night.

• 47:06Matt McCusker?

  Well, dude, it was not that far. If it was a jet, it would be like, the water would be moving.

• 47:11Speaker 00

  Yeah, it was low.

• 47:13Matt McCusker?

  That is my, that is my dad's main affliction though is like think he's seeing birds of prey. I mean like, there's a hawk right up there and it's just a fucking like transmitter on a power line.

• 47:23Speaker 00

  No, these were very clearly bald eagles and thank God there are tons of witnesses.

• 47:26Matt McCusker?

  But you gotta watch as an old white guy, you'll start hallucinating birds of prey.

• 47:29Speaker 00

  Birds of prey, nice.

• 47:30Matt McCusker?

  Happens to my dad all the time. It's so funny. That's a, that's a Cooper tail hawk right there. It's a piece of metal on top of a power line dude.

• 47:38Speaker 02

  It's a 18t.

• 47:39Speaker 00

  It's a crow. Crow, it's black.

• 47:44Matt McCusker?

  I will say turkey buzzards will get you. You'll be like, there's some hawks, turkey buzzards.

• 47:49Speaker 00

  I can spot a turkey buzzard.

• 47:51Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 47:51Speaker 00

  I can get those guys.

• 47:52Speaker 02

  I'd like to think I can go. I get tricked by the turkey buzzards all the time.

• 47:55Speaker 00

  Turkey vultures have those little tiny heads. It's pretty easy.

• 47:58Matt McCusker?

  Big as hell though. When they land, you get close to them, they're enormous.

• 48:00Speaker 00

  They're bigger than hawks. They're too big.

• 48:02Matt McCusker?

  Way bigger.

• 48:04Speaker 00

  I'm, I'm good with hawks. I'm, I'm.

• 48:06Matt McCusker?

  How exciting is it though when you really see one and then it lands?

• 48:08Speaker 00

  They were in my backyard every day in Westchester. There was like four of them that were in these trees right behind me. There was a big ass owl.

• 48:14Matt McCusker?

  What?

• 48:15Speaker 00

  That would hoot at night.

• 48:17Matt McCusker?

  Did you get full shot of the wingspan?

• 48:19Speaker 02

  Woo.

• 48:20Speaker 00

  No, it's kinda unnerving.

• 48:22Matt McCusker?

  Dude, I, when I first moved here in Austin, I weirdly, like my second week, I was just taking a walk at nighttime and I saw this giant bird on this little fence. And I'm like, what the fuck is that? Dude, it was an owl. Spread its wings. It was like four feet from me. I watched the full wingspan and flew away and I was like, I haven't seen it since.

• 48:38Speaker 00

  That's awesome.

• 48:38Matt McCusker?

  It was so fucking sick.

• 48:39Speaker 00

  It's good luck.

• 48:40Matt McCusker?

  It was. Did you ever see that, that thing where they like, they have, they record the audio of birds flying?

• 48:46Speaker 02

  No.

• 48:46Matt McCusker?

  Just like across a room and they're like, you can hear them all and then the owl flies and it's just whisper quiet.

• 48:52Speaker 00

  Yeah, you can't hear his wings.

• 48:54Matt McCusker?

  Really?

• 48:54Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's pretty sick. There's an animal that lives on this roof that occasionally just sprint. It sounds like it has two legs. It sounds like a guy sprints across the fucking ceiling.

• 49:02Matt McCusker?

  It's a raccoon probably.

• 49:04Speaker 00

  It is huge, bro.

• 49:05Matt McCusker?

  Dude, I had a raccoon on my roof.

• 49:06Speaker 00

  It sounds like.

• 49:07Matt McCusker?

  He sounded like a person on your roof dude.

• 49:10Speaker 00

  And then it'll just stand still for three days. And then three days, you've heard this fucking thing. Just sprints across the roof.

• 49:17Matt McCusker?

  At nighttime or during the daytime or nighttime?

• 49:19Speaker 00

  All time, anytime, bro.

• 49:21Matt McCusker?

  Okay.

• 49:21Speaker 00

  He's got no, he's got no clock.

• 49:23Matt McCusker?

  Cause I had a raccoon on my roof and that thing is nighttime.

• 49:25Speaker 00

  You'd think it'd just be nighttime, yeah.

• 49:26Matt McCusker?

  It would get active at nighttime and it's like, it's sound, I genuinely thought there was a human being on my roof and I like put my head out the window to try to find it.

• 49:33Speaker 00

  I know, I'd like to be able to see up there. I wanna see that guy. I might need to get a drone.

• 49:38Matt McCusker?

  His days are numbered. There's no way he can do the summer on the roof up there.

• 49:41Speaker 00

  He's sprinting up there. I think he just goes in that tree.

• 49:43Matt McCusker?

  Oh, yeah, true. True. Just gotta chill.

• 49:47Speaker 00

  He comes up here.

• 49:47Matt McCusker?

  Cools out up there.

• 49:48Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 49:49Matt McCusker?

  Damn.

• 49:50Speaker 00

  You've heard them sprint. He's fucking huge. He's gonna, I'm, the leg's gonna come through the ceiling while he's, he's gonna be wearing shoes.

• 50:00Matt McCusker?

  Start giving him food and stuff.

• 50:01Speaker 00

  I'll toss some dogs up there, toss some hot dogs.

• 50:03Matt McCusker?

  Toss some dogs, dude.

• 50:04Speaker 00

  Yeah. See how many animals I can get living up there? Just keep throwing food up there.

• 50:09Matt McCusker?

  I told you, I put, I put that, uh, compost out too early without breaking it down enough. And I literally brought a world of rats. And then stray cats into my garden. It was fucking kinda sick.

• 50:18Speaker 00

  True, you gotta get a cat.

• 50:20Matt McCusker?

  I, dude, I have a, I have a one that just walks around. I have a black cat and it comes in my backyard.

• 50:24Speaker 00

  Fuck that thing up.

• 50:25Matt McCusker?

  They can't catch, my dogs can't catch it.

• 50:27Speaker 00

  Totally?

• 50:27Matt McCusker?

  No, she cannot catch, that cat can jump on, onto the top of the fence. It's like not even close. But yeah, I have, that cat hunts the, uh, mice in my.

• 50:35Speaker 00

  Dude, we had something that was killing animals around this house. We would hear it all the time. You remember, like in the middle of the night, you just hear like,

• 50:45Matt McCusker?

  That's raccoons. That's definitely raccoons.

• 50:47Speaker 00

  I thought it was possums.

• 50:49Matt McCusker?

  Raccoons have screaming matches at night.

• 50:52Speaker 00

  Do they really?

• 50:53Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. I remember in Philly, when I was living in West Philly, they would scream at each, on, on rooftops, brawl, scream.

• 51:03Speaker 00

  What?

• 51:08Matt McCusker?

  They were hooting and hollering. Yeah, we identified.

• 51:11Speaker 00

  I was just like a forest gump. Cunt. I'll just brush them off the porch with a broom.

• 51:21Speaker 00

  This is forest gump. That's not me. That's Don Ax, dude. That's not me.

• 51:30Matt McCusker?

  How's Hank's?

• 51:31Speaker 00

  He's doing good, dude.

• 51:32Matt McCusker?

  Good.

• 51:34Matt McCusker?

  Sick, he's been cleared of being a pedophile. People were calling him a pedophile for all he's not. He's not. Did I get caught off in the craze? Perhaps.

• 51:42Speaker 00

  I might have got caught in that craze.

• 51:47Matt McCusker?

  Not a pedophile, and maybe Oprah's not too.

• 51:52Matt McCusker?

  Turns out, Tom Hanks, not a pedophile.

• 51:54Speaker 00

  We're going not a pedophile.

• 51:55Matt McCusker?

  Turns out Oprah, perhaps not a pedophile either.

• 51:58Speaker 00

  We'll see.

• 51:59Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, true.

• 51:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, that.

• 52:00Matt McCusker?

  Find out.

• 52:01Speaker 00

  They're still in the film room on Big Mike right now.

• 52:05Speaker 00

  They're still analyzing.

• 52:07Speaker 02

  Going to New York?

• 52:08Speaker 00

  Yeah, they're going to the headquarters, calling up Toronto.

• 52:12Matt McCusker?

  Candace Owens just put out like a for real documentary, or maybe produced it, I don't know. I just saw something with, she was attached to. Of Macron's wife. Being like, this is a dude, like, I know we all like to fuck around.

• 52:23Speaker 00

  That one actually could be.

• 52:24Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I know, but it's fucking.

• 52:25Speaker 00

  Either way, how much older? Wasn't it like his teacher?

• 52:29Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. She had time.

• 52:32Speaker 00

  She had a lot of time.

• 52:33Matt McCusker?

  She had time, fucking do what she needed to do.

• 52:34Speaker 00

  You ever take a look at Macron's wife?

• 52:36Matt McCusker?

  Uh, not a good one. When I learned she was older, I kind of like researched her briefly, but then I fell into one of Candace Owens' videos.

• 52:43Speaker 00

  They hooked her up with a good picture.

• 52:45Matt McCusker?

  Candace Owens is pushing hard that Macron's wife is indeed a guy, and it's not like, we all have fun with Big Mike, obviously.

• 52:51Speaker 02

  I could see Candace, I could see Candace also being.

• 52:55Matt McCusker?

  She's gone down a couple rabbit holes pretty hard.

• 52:58Speaker 00

  Never mind, Macron's wife.

• 53:00Matt McCusker?

  What'd you think? Careful. Time will tell.

• 53:03Speaker 00

  Well, we'll see. If I got tricked here, it could happen to anybody.

• 53:07Matt McCusker?

  I mean, if the president of France got tricked.

• 53:08Speaker 00

  For gees?

• 53:10Matt McCusker?

  Let me see. If the president of France, actually, I have my phone right here. Huh?

• 53:17Matt McCusker?

  What the fuck are you trying to say?

• 53:20Speaker 02

  I'm with Gardini, I think Candace might have some secrets.

• 53:22Matt McCusker?

  Macron's wife looks like Candace Owens?

• 53:26Matt McCusker?

  Let me see this, bro. Yo, what if Macron's wife was Candace Owens?

• 53:30Speaker 00

  Macron's wife is 71.

• 53:33Matt McCusker?

  Whoa.

• 53:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 53:34Matt McCusker?

  Wait, how old's he? 50?

• 53:37Matt McCusker?

  Oh shit.

• 53:38Speaker 00

  47.

• 53:39Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, she's way older than him, dude.

• 53:40Speaker 00

  She was his fucking like, teacher when he was real young, like he was like 12.

• 53:44Matt McCusker?

  Very French.

• 53:46Speaker 02

  Very French.

• 53:47Speaker 00

  She was 39, he was 15.

• 53:49Matt McCusker?

  Bro, I mean.

• 53:53Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 53:54Speaker 00

  True.

• 53:54Matt McCusker?

  Kind of sick. I mean, to keep the thing going, kinda weird, uh, in school, sick. Although if you're tapping into that, like magical moment. Yeah, man. I mean, dude, look, look, look. Again, this is not my business either. If the guy's wife is a dude, that's their business. And if not, that's a vicious rumor that needs to be stopped.

• 54:15Matt McCusker?

  What if, what if she's a dude, but he just doesn't know?

• 54:19Speaker 02

  Yeah. Just forty years of, I don't feel like it tonight.

• 54:22Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 54:23Speaker 02

  What the hell? Also very French.

• 54:25Matt McCusker?

  Although the fact that the teacher, you know, was romantic towards him. Wouldn't, like, doesn't that kinda throw a monkey wrench into the story? You know what I mean? Like in the seventies, you're telling me in the seventies, or whenever that was, there was a trans teacher in France that was like huffing the kids' birds and nobody,

• 54:46Matt McCusker?

  nobody knew about that?

• 54:47Speaker 02

  That's what the movie Four Hundred Blows is about.

• 54:50Matt McCusker?

  I know France is like a very romantic place, but it's like, you think.

• 54:53Speaker 00

  It's the ultimate romance. Trans teacher huffing on birds.

• 54:58Matt McCusker?

  She just hits you with one of those French accordions and you're like, what the fuck's happening?

• 55:01Speaker 00

  This is. Damn, he's so French. He was, uh, he was a miner. Macron has described it as a love often clandestine, often hidden, misunderstood by many before imposing itself.

• 55:13Speaker 02

  That's so, what a sexy thing.

• 55:14Speaker 00

  Fuck, that's weird. No, that's not sexy. Shut up, it's disgusting. I hate fucking dudes being sexy. Fucking pisses me off every time.

• 55:22Matt McCusker?

  Dude, imagine, imagine the likes of Paris. He got molested by a forty year old lady when he was twelve.

• 55:27Speaker 00

  He did get molested when he was.

• 55:28Matt McCusker?

  That would turn you into a hopeless romantic.

• 55:32Speaker 00

  I've seen it go the other way, but yes.

• 55:37Speaker 00

  I've seen it go the other way a lot of times.

• 55:42Matt McCusker?

  Just the, just the women to male student, obviously. The other one would be truly a tragedy. That's not cool at all.

• 55:47Speaker 02

  It's more clandestine.

• 55:49Matt McCusker?

  Not romantic.

• 55:50Speaker 00

  Not romantic.

• 55:50Matt McCusker?

  Those dudes are not that clandestine, man. They're just firing off texts, really, really. It's crazy.

• 55:56Speaker 00

  We were watching, we were watching some Catch a Predator, throwback actions.

• 55:59Matt McCusker?

  Did you see the clip I sent you where the guy was like, BB cream pie? Talking about a bareback cream pie. It's like, bro. I think that is just like the absolute seventh level of hell at the bottom of a porn hole is just you're just talking to Chris Hansen, like, how the fuck did I get here?

• 56:14Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 56:14Matt McCusker?

  You just go deep.

• 56:15Speaker 00

  You may ask yourself.

• 56:18Speaker 02

  How did I get here?

• 56:21Speaker 00

  That is not my text message. It's not my beautiful text.

• 56:30Speaker 00

  I just remember one guy being crazy for the Nats. He was a Nationals baseball fan. His username was crazy for the Nats. And he's on there like, yeah, I'll fucking reshape your pussy.

• 56:42Matt McCusker?

  You got lost on the way to the Nats game?

• 56:44Speaker 00

  It's almost more embarrassing than the text.

• 56:46Matt McCusker?

  Crazy for the Nats.

• 56:46Speaker 00

  It's like, is this your screen name? Crazy for the fucking Nationals?

• 56:51Speaker 00

  No? Did you text this kid?

• 56:52Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. Yeah, I did, I did.

• 56:55Speaker 00

  But that is not my fucking screen name.

• 56:57Matt McCusker?

  That's my brother's screen name, actually.

• 56:58Speaker 00

  It's my brother's name.

• 56:59Matt McCusker?

  It was me trying to have sex with a kid, but that's my brother's screen name. I just want to clear the record.

• 57:05Matt McCusker?

  I wonder if the Nats have banned him from the stadium?

• 57:08Speaker 00

  I don't know. They let Obama in.

• 57:11Speaker 00

  And he sucked.

• 57:14Speaker 00

  He seemed to have kept it of age.

• 57:17Matt McCusker?

  I think so, yeah.

• 57:18Speaker 00

  Very.

• 57:19Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. As long, yeah, I mean, for sure. The emails about hot dogs are weird, but...

• 57:24Speaker 00

  True. I forgot about the hot dog emails. That was nuts, dude. What's going on with the hot dogs, bro?

• 57:29Matt McCusker?

  There was hot dogs, walnuts. That was like, that was like prime pizza gate Q stuff. I remember like just really, I had Q drops on my phone. I'd be like, oh shit. It'd be like a picture of like a plain bathroom. I'd be like, what is going to come next?

• 57:42Speaker 00

  What could this?

• 57:42Matt McCusker?

  They had me on the line for a little bit, then I was just like, I can't, this stuff's too hard to follow. I don't know any senators' names. I didn't know anything people were talking about.

• 57:49Speaker 00

  You know, John Podesta is going down today.

• 57:51Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. His aide.

• 57:53Speaker 00

  Good. Get him.

• 57:55Matt McCusker?

  I was just, I for real, for a minute, I truly did think that Hillary Clinton might-

• 57:58Speaker 00

  Well, Podesta, I think that was a real one.

• 58:01Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, he's got, apparently, allegedly, he's got some weird artwork, but you never know, you know? You don't know what's- The pizza gate thing was hot dog orders, right? Well, there was the pizza place itself, which was like tied to something.

• 58:12Speaker 00

  I was listening to War Mode today about it.

• 58:14Matt McCusker?

  The what?

• 58:14Speaker 00

  They were fired off about it.

• 58:15Matt McCusker?

  Were they fired off about the pizza gate?

• 58:16Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah. They maintained pizza gate's never been debunked.

• 58:19Matt McCusker?

  Well, the guy went in there with a gun, right?

• 58:21Speaker 00

  Yeah, and apparently he's shot. I don't know. I don't know. I'm getting it from war mode.

• 58:27Matt McCusker?

  True.

• 58:28Speaker 00

  Shot like the, his one shot went into the hard drive of the, I don't.

• 58:32Matt McCusker?

  Really?

• 58:33Speaker 00

  But I think that guy just got killed.

• 58:35Matt McCusker?

  Did he really?

• 58:36Speaker 00

  I think, yeah, some cops rolled up on him and they're like, oh, he's got a gun and executed him.

• 58:40Matt McCusker?

  What? Just a pile of hot dogs around him? Well, no, the, the email that supposedly got leaked was like, we're gonna need, it was like walnuts, where apparently little black boys, hot dogs were like, white kids, and there was like a term for like girls. And there was this weird email that was saying, allegedly, it could be, it could be fake. But it was like, we need sixty walnuts and like forty hot dogs. And then you tie into like the Haiti stuff.

• 59:02Speaker 00

  People like, oh, we love this, the hot dogs you guys have.

• 59:04Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 59:05Speaker 00

  It'd be like Ellen talking to like Diddy, like, oh, when are we gonna have another pizza party?

• 59:12Matt McCusker?

  It's called a wild, it's called a wild king night, by the way.

• 59:14Speaker 00

  Although Sandler was on one of those clips I saw saying, they have the best pizza parties, and it's like, bro, I know the Sandman, so I'm involved. So they're just legit talking pizza parties.

• 59:24Matt McCusker?

  Could be them getting down to some za. Za's different.

• 59:27Speaker 00

  They could trick cool guys, they could bring the Sandman in and go, we actually are having pizza parties. Talk about the pizza party.

• 59:33Matt McCusker?

  True.

• 59:33Speaker 02

  Is there any footage of them actually having pizza parties at this pizza place? And are they the best pizza parties?

• 59:41Matt McCusker?

  I don't know.

• 59:42Speaker 00

  I don't know. I feel like you kinda age out. I've never had like a real good pizza.

• 59:47Speaker 00

  There's a pizza party, I'm leaving there just.

• 59:51Speaker 02

  That's a good pizza.

• 59:52Speaker 00

  That's a terrible pizza party.

• 59:53Matt McCusker?

  Wait, so Sandman was at presidential pizza parties?

• 59:56Speaker 00

  Sandman, I think saw, I saw a clip of the Sandman, I think he was on Ellen talking about how good the pizza parties were.

• 1:00:02Matt McCusker?

  Crazy. Yeah, I don't know. But it could, it could be them eating pizza, for sure.

• 1:00:08Speaker 02

  There'd have to be others, there'd have to be like a pinata and some other thing, to justify that type of excitement over a pizza party.

• 1:00:15Matt McCusker?

  True.

• 1:00:16Speaker 02

  There'd have to be.

• 1:00:16Matt McCusker?

  DC doesn't have like the best pizza, I, I would imagine. It's not like a pizza hotspot. I'm sure it's good, it's on the east coast, it's the east coast seaboard.

• 1:00:24Speaker 00

  The fuck are they talking about pizza?

• 1:00:25Matt McCusker?

  I don't know, man.

• 1:00:26Speaker 00

  And hot dogs.

• 1:00:27Matt McCusker?

  Hot dogs are sus.

• 1:00:28Speaker 00

  I know they're not eating dogs like that.

• 1:00:30Matt McCusker?

  Nah.

• 1:00:31Speaker 00

  Although he's Chicago. They're talking about some good dogs.

• 1:00:35Matt McCusker?

  Well, Obama's a fucking, he's definitely crushing dogs.

• 1:00:41Speaker 00

  His chef's cooking up some dogs.

• 1:00:47Matt McCusker?

  I keep forgetting his gay chef died in the pool, like a pod.

• 1:00:50Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:00:50Matt McCusker?

  Wait, what?

• 1:00:53Speaker 00

  Obama's Obama's secret lovers, gay chef died.

• 1:00:58Speaker 02

  Paddle boarding?

• 1:00:59Matt McCusker?

  Hold on, are we, I don't want to radicalize any, any kids into right wing extremism, dude.

• 1:01:03Speaker 00

  Yeah, we are.

• 1:01:04Matt McCusker?

  This podcasting space, you know, we fucking ruined the country.

• 1:01:06Speaker 00

  This is a platform and it's very important.

• 1:01:08Matt McCusker?

  We blew the election, dude. We fucking ruined it because we, we radicalized.

• 1:01:13Speaker 02

  Well, this is, we're bringing this up specifically to debunk.

• 1:01:16Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:17Speaker 00

  It's gonna be tough to debunk.

• 1:01:21Matt McCusker?

  That could, I mean.

• 1:01:23Speaker 02

  Is that confirmed? That's still up in the air.

• 1:01:25Matt McCusker?

  That's like the best thing I've heard come out about Obama. It's been like war criminal, gay chef murder, smoking crack. Yeah, there's that.

• 1:01:34Speaker 00

  The hot babe is the nicest rumor.

• 1:01:37Matt McCusker?

  I will say that I was, uh, I thought he was gonna come out and really sway the election. Nobody gave a fuck.

• 1:01:43Speaker 00

  It's because he did it wrong. He got in front of black people like, come on, brothers.

• 1:01:46Matt McCusker?

  I know.

• 1:01:47Speaker 00

  Y'all ain't black if y'all ain't voting for Kamala, y'all. He's like, we know that's not how you talk.

• 1:01:52Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, but Joe was probably like, dude, trust me, it works. Like, I talk black as hell.

• 1:01:57Matt McCusker?

  I know him coming out being like, shit is fucking.

• 1:02:00Speaker 00

  Shit, fly suckers.

• 1:02:04Matt McCusker?

  Not the move for the Obamner.

• 1:02:07Speaker 02

  So crazy.

• 1:02:09Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, he, he did, he gave, after that, he gave. Well, he gave a good speech after that. Just gave like a nice speech that was like, kind of like his usual stuff of like values, inspiring, all that stuff.

• 1:02:20Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:02:20Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, while he came out, he's like, I don't know what these.

• 1:02:23Speaker 02

  Were they getting data? Were they, were they getting just constant like interviews with black people and they were just like, I'm voting for a woman? Why did they, why did he come out and say that?

• 1:02:34Matt McCusker?

  I think they were polling black men and black men were like fuck that. It was just like.

• 1:02:38Speaker 00

  That was right when it was coming. It was pretty clear that the black vote was starting to swing more towards Trump than it ever had.

• 1:02:45Matt McCusker?

  Did they just make it up in their heads that they were?

• 1:02:47Speaker 00

  I think they were polling. I mean, or you could get in an Uber and talk to a black guy.

• 1:02:50Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, true.

• 1:02:53Speaker 00

  Every single black guy I knew.

• 1:02:56Matt McCusker?

  Obama took an Uber to the speech?

• 1:02:58Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:02:59Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, he just got filled in on the deets. But no, they're probably doing polls and they're finding out like, and there's just, you watch online, there's so many people be like, man, fuck Kamala. Trump. Trump when we had a bread. Saw a lot of videos. We got a lot of bread during Trump. It was just... And they're right, the bread was flowing.

• 1:03:14Speaker 00

  Bread was flowing.

• 1:03:15Matt McCusker?

  So, yeah. And Obama, he's like, well, if I can't do the bread, I don't have the bread. I didn't, you know, I don't have the track record of the bread, but I can do like racial shame. So, that was like, they tried to do that. Like, you're not, you know. That is, that's a powerful tool. I hate to say it, but that's a powerful tool for, I feel like, black, black people in general to be like, bro, we're gonna, we're gonna just like, take your fucking black essence and hide it from you. It's true. You can get ousted, bro.

• 1:03:41Speaker 00

  The Republicans do a good job of that with men.

• 1:03:43Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:43Speaker 00

  You're voting for a fucking Democrat?

• 1:03:47Speaker 00

  What are you, gay, you pussy?

• 1:03:51Matt McCusker?

  It's true.

• 1:03:51Speaker 00

  I might, I might perpetrate that sometimes.

• 1:03:54Matt McCusker?

  It's nice.

• 1:03:54Speaker 00

  I might be a perpetrator. You're a dude who voted Democrat?

• 1:04:00Matt McCusker?

  Seen that.

• 1:04:01Speaker 00

  So embarrassing.

• 1:04:05Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, we'll see, man. We'll see what happens after, uh, his four. This is his last four. Unless he puts in like Donny Jr. He might.

• 1:04:13Speaker 00

  You never know.

• 1:04:14Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. He might.

• 1:04:16Speaker 00

  He's gonna be geez up at the end of this run.

• 1:04:18Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. He might, he might go out. How old is he now? It's like 80, bro.

• 1:04:23Speaker 00

  He's probably 79.

• 1:04:25Matt McCusker?

  He eats bad, too. He could go through an FDR fizz.

• 1:04:28Speaker 00

  He's at least 70.

• 1:04:29Matt McCusker?

  In the wheelchair.

• 1:04:30Speaker 00

  I think he's 79.

• 1:04:31Matt McCusker?

  Is he 79? I thought he, for some reason, I thought he was 80.

• 1:04:34Speaker 00

  78.

• 1:04:35Matt McCusker?

  Okay, alright. He's...

• 1:04:39Speaker 00

  Damn. He's six years older than McCrone's wife.

• 1:04:42Matt McCusker?

  Shit.

• 1:04:43Speaker 00

  Shit.

• 1:04:46Matt McCusker?

  Well dude, I think we, yeah, let's roll to the motherfucking Patreon.

• 1:04:49Speaker 00

  That's good stuff.

• 1:04:50Matt McCusker?

  Da na na na, hard cliffhanger dude. We have some good topics. Da na na na.

• 1:04:57Speaker 00

  Lot of good topics. I haven't even gotten into any of my topics.

• 1:05:00Matt McCusker?

  Dude, I have a good one, bro.

• 1:05:02Speaker 00

  We're gonna catch the raccoon on the roof. I'm gonna bring him in as our guest.

• 1:05:06Speaker 02

  It's a pizza party.

• 1:05:08Speaker 00

  We do have to talk a lot of Hell Let Loose.

• 1:05:10Matt McCusker?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:05:11Speaker 00

  Yeah, we gotta talk Hell Let Loose.

• 1:05:12Speaker 02

  Hell Let Loose is incredible.

• 1:05:14Speaker 00

  Join us on the Patreon.