2564: Intentional Living with Dr. D. Ivan Young

LifeBlood: We talked about the power and value of intentional living, self-efficacy, empathy, compassion, helping people overcome challenges, and how to get started, with Dr. D. Ivan Young, Master Practitioner. Listen to learn how increased self-awareness can get you a lot closer to the life you want! You can learn more about D. Ivan at DrDIvanYoung.com https://drdivanyoung.com/, Facebook https://www.facebook.com/DrDivanYoung/, Instagram https://www.instagram.com/drdivanyoung/, YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@RealityN3D, and LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/drdivanyoung/. George’s newest book is available! Get your copy of The Meaningful Few here: https://amzn.to/4qA26X9 Feeling busy but unfulfilled? The Meaningful Few helps you identify what truly matters, eliminate distractions, and live with intention and clarity. Learn more here: https://www.mymeaningfulfew.com/ Thanks, as always for listening! If you got some value and enjoyed the show, please leave us a review here: ​​https://ratethispodcast.com/lifebloodpodcast You can learn more about us at LifeBlood. Live http://lifeblood.live/, Twitter https://twitter.com/ourlifeblood, LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/lifebloodlive, Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lifeblood.live/, YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNQ9Gc4mMwCHZKUHjbt0-qA and Facebook https://www.facebook.com/lifebloodlive or you’d like to be a guest on the show, contact us at contact@LifeBlood. Live. Stay up to date by getting our monthly updates https://george-grombacher.aweb.page. Want to say “Thanks!” You can buy us a cup of coffee. https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lifeblood Copyright LifeBlood 2026.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:42Speaker 01

  Dr. D. Yvonne Young is an expert on human behavior and building fulfilling relationships. He is a master credentialed expert on personality type, highly sought-after keynote speaker and media personality. Dr. D. is an ICF credentialed master certified coach. He is a certified professional diversity coach, a national board certified health and wellness coach, as well as a credentialed master MBTI practitioner. I'm glad I do not have to say those very often, sir. That is evidence of a lot of very hard work. Welcome to the show, Dr. D.

• 1:15Speaker 02

  Thank you, man. It's, I don't have to say that a lot either, but that makes two of us.

• 1:21Speaker 01

  Well, I'm glad to have you on. Tell us a little bit about your personal life, more about your work and why you do what you do.

• 1:30Speaker 02

  At day's end, I'm a guy that just cares about people. I think that we live in a world where kindness, empathy, and compassion is in short supply. My mission in life is to be a guy that hopefully reflects those decisions because they're not so much character traits, though people think they are. But the decision to be kind, to be empathetic, and to be compassionate is something I strive for. In terms of personal life, I've dedicated my entire existence, especially this season in my life, to creating transformational outcomes for people and helping people to get answers to questions they didn't even know to ask.

• 2:14Speaker 01

  I like that a lot. We need to have, there's so much value in a good question. And to be able to ask somebody else, but then to be able to, to turn that around and ask ourselves. Uh, cause there's a lot to uncover, but we need the right tool. And sometimes a question can be the right tool.

• 2:31Speaker 02

  Yeah, definitely that. You know, when, um, I look at offerings like your podcast.

• 2:39Speaker 02

  So many people are searching for an answer. They just don't know to what. And when we take a moment to look at the things that are probably getting on our nerves, the stuff that's going on right here, right in your face. There's, there's a bunch of nuggets behind that. And, and my experience has been the more challenging, the season, the more troubling, the turmoil. There's probably some, something inside of there that is stimulating or, or agitating you. So that something deep inside of you or something that's just right at the surface been trying to break through.

• 3:22Speaker 02

  Now has justification to reveal itself.

• 3:26Speaker 01

  So the stuff that, that we find ourselves looping on or being irritated by, that's, that's potentially data for us.

• 3:34Speaker 02

  Definitely. I mean, have you ever had a season in your life? Where you look back and you're just looking at everything you did well. Well, many of us have, some haven't. But if you look at a season in your life where you were pressed. Where back was to the wall. You may have felt hopeless, discouraged, but somehow you tapped into some part of yourself that you may or may not know existed. That's the stuff that gives us self-efficacy.

• 4:16Speaker 02

  That's the stuff that attracts people to us. Nobody cares about how you shine, but they do care. And appreciate when they can look at you, see themselves in you and have some hope. That's a big thing.

• 4:37Speaker 01

  Self-efficacy, tell me more about that.

• 4:40Speaker 02

  You know, self-efficacy in short definition is when someone can revisit a time or a situation where they were at the back up against the wall, where they had to figure a way out. In some way, they did. The more that you do that, it gives you courage that the next time something challenges you, you can remember, well, I remember that time when, or you know, the other day. So if I made it through that, I can make it through this. That's a powerful thing.

• 5:19Speaker 01

  People talk about, they say leveling up, and that's sort of a trite, kind of a throwaway term these days, but that's sort of what that is, is you're proving to yourself that you're capable, you're proving to yourself that you're somebody that I can, I can rely on myself. I know that, that when the bad things happen, a storm comes, that I'm not going to just be crushed by it.

• 5:39Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. And when you're working with a clinician, a coach, a mentor, even if you're a leader in an executive situation, your job is to ask people these open-ended questions and allow them to tap into the strengths that they had. Because here's the thing, as a duly master credential practitioner, if I give you the answer, what did you learn? And then if I give you the answer and it doesn't work, who are you going to blame? So the truth is, my better bet is to

• 6:20Speaker 02

  remind you of who you are and what you're capable of. And if I can do that through us interacting, clinically, that's called motivational interviewing. Another term is appreciative inquiry. But when we do things like that, we actually tap into neurochemistry, and at that point, neuroscience kicks in. If I may, George, can I explain this a bit? Do I have your permission?

• 6:46Speaker 01

  Please.

• 6:51Speaker 02

  We look at our typical day. Many of us are walking around in fight or flight mode and we don't even know it.

• 7:00Speaker 02

  So a couple of examples. In prehistoric times and early evolutions of mankind, it was the growl in the bushes, right? Or late at night, your fire didn't give you enough illumination for you to see what's over there. So you hear something growl or something move and you kind of wake up, you perk up and you know you're either gonna have to fight or run or just be still if you wanna live. Well, in 2026, that happens just because we got a text message from somebody. That happens, seriously. It happens one dopamine at a time when you're going through a social media scroll

• 7:44Speaker 02

  because that algorithm, it's got you, it's got you. And if you notice the pattern, the algorithm gives you a balance of titillation to the point you read X number of posts that piss you off. And then you look at another post that has the little puppy and the guy that's doing something stupid. So you laugh. And so what it is, is almost like a dysfunctional relationship that you're being groomed for because you're either really happy or you're really pissed. And then we do that to ourselves. You know, we are very much vulnerable and triggered by certain things, but we try to find happiness.

• 8:23Speaker 02

  Sometimes the wrong way through a joint or a bottle or sex or, you know, what have you. So the thing that we would be wise to do now is to look at what's going on with me. You know, what do I need? Why am I acting the way that I'm acting? Because when I teach this to young physicians and even experienced licensed clinicians, one thing I tell them over and over is you cannot talk to the psychology until you get the physiology under control. So within ourselves.

• 9:05Speaker 03

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• 9:34Speaker 04

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• 10:03Speaker 02

  It's a good idea to think about, okay, am I stressed? Why is my heart beat rapid? Or why do I not feel like getting out the bed or doing anything? Well, that's a sign that you have been limbic hijacked and your amygdala is running the show. And for us to be productive, for us to grow, we have to stop operating from the middle of the brain, which is the survival center, and start using this stuff in the prefrontal cortex so that we can live by intention.

• 10:36Speaker 01

  I think we all want to do that. Do most people want that? We just have no idea what it is we're doing. We don't recognize what you just took us through, that we're all operating in fight or flight. And it's been, whether it's been intentional or not, it's happening to us. But would most people prefer to not be let around?

• 10:56Speaker 02

  You know, this is something, George, that you're hidden on because some people don't even know they have a choice.

• 11:04Speaker 02

  Many people get stuck in survival mode and they're like the proverbial hamster on the wheel. It's just the faster I run, the more the wheel spins. Okay, I'm tired. I'll just walk. The wheel is still spinning. You never got off the wheel. I don't think people, if they were aware.

• 11:23Speaker 02

  That they're not operating at their best. If people are made aware that, are you hearing how you're talking to yourself? Oh, that was so blank and stupid. Shh, man, why in the hell did I do that? Well, would you allow someone else to talk to you that way? Probably not. If you heard someone talk to someone you love, like your mom, or your dad, or somebody you're trying to protect like your kid, would you let the teacher talk to your child like that? So why are you talking to you like that? When I wrote Leading From The Heart, one of the biggest factors that caused me to write that book, I'd gotten diagnosed with this cancer diagnosis.

• 12:07Speaker 02

  And, you know, in my youth, like a lot of people in the eighties and nineties, I smoked pot and drank and partied and all that, but I hadn't done that stuff, literally, man, in over twenty-some years. Why in the hell did I end up with a retromolar oral cancer? And then by the time it manifested, it took off like, you know, some Olympian running the four forty. It went from stage two to stage four, and then rapid, and I'm like, wait. So one day, I was doing one of these Facebook Live things and, you know, maybe about every month, I had between three and six hundred thousand people tuning into this stuff.

• 12:51Speaker 02

  Next thing you know, George, I'm, I'm out in this kind of off biking area, hiking, and I would always be in these nature settings when I do these prayers and these commentaries and right after I got off, I started tearing up. Now, I'm not a guy. You know, I'm, I'm, I guess I'm old school. I'm a man's man, that's what my daddy would say, but I started tearing up and I heard this little voice. Some people may call it God, some people the Holy Spirit and Angel, whatever you want to call it. But I know damn well, I heard this voice tell me, it's okay to be scared. And I was like.

• 13:33Speaker 02

  Not scared. And well, let me tell the truth. Who wouldn't be scared? If, one, your face would stage for cancer. Two, I've never had a surgery, let alone one that was gonna involve seven surgical teams in twelve hours, seven to twelve hours, which it ended up being over twelve hours. Well, that taught me about empathy. Self empathy. It taught me about compassion, self compassion. And when I realized that that's not a benevolent trait. That's not a pious behavior. Those things are strategic and they're actionable, meaning they're skills. The issue with many of us is that

• 14:20Speaker 02

  we have that done to us on a daily basis. And the closest source is look at the algorithms. You go look at some shoes. Next thing you know, every time you turn your dog on, fall on shoes, right? Or if you're watching TV, politicians do a great job of, pardon my language, exploiting us, but I really want to use the word pimping us. And by telling us, you know, you don't like this person and you shouldn't because look what they're taking from you, or, you know, look at this, this is a threat. You need me to solve the problem. And we weren't even thinking about being threatened. We weren't thinking about this person. But when people speak to your voice, your fears,

• 15:05Speaker 02

  the things you feel you have no control over. That's weaponized empathy. And basically, when they do that to you, they only want you to vote. Once they get your vote, they could care less about you. Once they get you to buy that product, okay, good luck on the service. Go buy that car. Well, in two years, you're gonna be pissed about that car, right? So we can use empathy in a positive way. We can ask ourselves, what do I need right now? You know, maybe, and for, and for many of your listeners, George, if some people, they need to tell somebody no, and realize it's a complete sentence. You don't need to explain

• 15:48Speaker 02

  anything. No is a complete sentence. And when I say that, I mean, setting up boundaries. There are times when you need to tell yourself, no. And ask yourself, you know, instead of drinking another bottle of wine, or, or smoking another joint, what else could I do? Okay, maybe go for a walk. That sounds awfully boring. But see, when you go for the walk, you're not doing something that's messing up the surfactant and the aviol in your lungs, nor are you, uh, eroding your kidneys and your liver, right? So by being empathetic with ourselves, we have an opportunity to change the quality of our lives, as well as increasing

• 16:33Speaker 02

  our longevity and our well-being.

• 16:37Speaker 01

  Beautifully said. So,

• 16:43Speaker 01

  what do I need right now? Must say, I, I, I need a release. I'm gonna go have that beer. I'm gonna go smoke that joint. Then what, whatever. Say, okay, I could do that, but those have negative consequences to me. What else could I be doing? I could take a walk. Um, first and foremost, do people have a hard time? You mentioned, I'm, I'm a guy's guy. I'm not gonna cry. I'm strong. I'm not gonna do that. So, you know, what am I doing? I just need to sort of bear down and kind of get through this. Is, is, is there some of that going on too with people?

• 17:19Speaker 02

  Well, here's the deal. You, we have times in life where we do need to bear down, and we need to push through. But when we've been bearing down and pushing through every damn day.

• 17:32Speaker 02

  How is that good, right? How is it good when we don't rest? When we don't do something as simple as just say, you know, I'm just gonna sit here. I'm gonna chill. Yeah, one of our issues with technology is we have become enslaved by it rather than liberated with by it. And when we abandon things like enjoying a good conversation with an old friend.

• 18:04Speaker 05

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• 18:06Speaker 06

  My sister had amazing.

• 18:07Speaker 05

  The ideal treatment is.

• 18:08Speaker 03

  Seems like everyone's a GLP-1 expert these days. But when it comes to your health, it pays to listen to someone who actually is. Orderly Meds makes it easy to get started with personalized support along the way. And with your first month's order, we're giving you the second month free. Visit OrderlyMeds.com. Bringing orders to the chaos of GLP-1s. Individual results may vary. Eligibility and prescription required. Not medical advice. Visit OrderlyMeds.com for details. Compound and medications are not FDA approved.

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• 19:05Speaker 02

  But we can see them online and we can click on and do a fist bump or LOL, look, if we really wanna show up, do a gift. And what about calling this dude and just say, hey, bro, how are you? Because men, especially men, I wrote, I wrote a blog on that. We don't do that. We don't call each other and just say, man, you know, I really, I was thinking about you. You good? Are you all right? We don't, we don't say things like, you know, I just wanna tell you, man, I haven't forgot about you. I haven't forgot about that time when I needed you and you had my back. Why don't we go shoot some pool or throw some darts? Right? These things.

• 19:52Speaker 02

  That we have adapted that cause us to tell someone what we do before we tell them what we're called. That's a problem. Another sign is when you look more forward to leaving home than you do coming home. Or the other one, you don't want to spend any time by yourself. Well, if you don't want to be alone with you, why in the hell would somebody else want to be alone with you? Cause these things are warning signs. They're they're y- yellow and in my opinion, sometimes red flags snapping in the wind. So it would be a good idea.

• 20:34Speaker 02

  One day, here's an exercise I'm going to give you guys. Just map your thoughts for half a day, like every hour. Take a pen, use your phone and just write a, you know, type in what what did I think about the last hour? And be honest, just whatever it is, like what did I think about? Then after six to 12 hours, preferably, if you can do this for two days, it's even better. But if after 12 hours, you look at that list. And on that list, you you had a drink of beer five times. On that list, you had some chick or some guy's name five times.

• 21:19Speaker 02

  That should tell you that your attention is much more focused on things that are external to you. And you're not paying enough attention to what's going on with you internally.

• 21:33Speaker 01

  Some more really good evidence right there.

• 21:37Speaker 01

  Is it prudent to to sit down and think about? A list of activities that you could pivot to or make the decision of. So when you do catch yourself wanting to do something mildly destructive or extremely destructive that you could say, no, I've made the decision that I'm going to do X, Y, or Z.

• 21:55Speaker 02

  I think that is a great starting point. There's this this theorem called the trans-theoretical model of change. And it it basically says pre-contemplation, that's like, I don't know, I don't care if I do this, I don't even know if I want to. Then there's contemplation where you're weighing, okay, if I do, what do you know, what's the cost versus the benefit? And then there's this preparation stage where it's like, you know what, I that's the fourth pair of pants I put on. Hell, I can't button them up. Maybe I need to stop eating and going to the gym, so I'm gonna go to. So that preparation stage is powerful. Well,

• 22:33Speaker 02

  that's what you're talking about. You're talking about that time when you have now contemplated and thought about, man, I'm, you know, I smoked. I got three packs of cigarettes.

• 22:50Speaker 02

  I see three packs. And and I bought three packs to last me three days.

• 22:58Speaker 02

  Why the hell did I do that? Or you look up and you're like, okay, that's the I'm I'm smoking, I remember when I was smoking pot when I was younger, I would smoke a joint in the morning, because I just woke up. Then, okay, it's time to eat lunch, I'd smoke a joint. Okay, well, just got home from class or work, let me smoke another joint. All right, this chicken's coming over. Let me smoke a joint. And and I started realizing, I'm like, what the is wrong with you? I mean, everything you wanna amplify by smoking a joint. Well, you know, some people are laughing at me because they're like, that's some old

• 23:39Speaker 02

  school shit. No, it's not. The truth is, we all do that. Some people do it with a glass of wine. Some people do it with religion. Some people do it with work. Bottom line is, you have empowered something other than you to help you escape.

• 23:58Speaker 02

  Your own life. And what, what, what we have to think about is if I am going to make that decision, like what you said earlier, George, is that let me at least have a plan. Let me think that, you know what? I might still smoke this joint, but if I do, I'm not going to do it till after I get, I'm going to get up from here. I'm going to walk around the block a couple, I'm going to ride my bicycle. And I'm going to ride my bike and, and a Peloton, if you can't go outside. I'm going to get on the Peloton, I'm going to spend thirty minutes and then I'm going to do whatever, whatever my crutch is, right?

• 24:40Speaker 02

  Pretty soon, if you continue that behavior, you're not going to need the crutch. But it happens by taking that first step.

• 24:49Speaker 01

  I love it. What are you empowering in your life?

• 24:55Speaker 01

  Dr. D, thank you so much for coming on. Thank you so much for walking us through these and for giving us a lot to think about. Where can people learn more about you? How can people engage with you?

• 25:05Speaker 02

  Well, it's real simple. My middle name is controversial because it's Yvonne, but it's Dr. Put the D in front of it. Here's why. There's a guy that has, well, I'm not going to say it. I don't want to bad mouth anybody, but just put the D in front of my name. So it's D. And spell like Ivan, I V A N, last name Young. You could just Google me or put, you know, ask chat or Gemini or Claude or something. But I'm available on all the normal stuff, Instagram, LinkedIn, what have you. Uh, the books, you can just type my name in or go into any bookstore and my books are there. And my TED Talks and all that junk is on YouTube.

• 25:45Speaker 02

  Bottom line, hit me up and if there's anything I can do to help you get to know you better and have you live the life that I know you deserve, please reach out. I'm definitely here for you.

• 25:58Speaker 01

  Love it. Well, if you enjoyed this as much as I did, show Dr. D your appreciation. Share today's show with a friend who also appreciates good ideas. You can find Dr. D on all over the internet. It's D. Yvonne Young. You can pick up his books. I will link to those in the notes of the show. You can find Ted Talks on YouTube. I will link to those in the notes of the show as well as everywhere else and encourage you to get in touch with them. Thanks again, Dr. D.

• 26:26Speaker 02

  Hey, George. Thanks for having me, man. It was a blast.

• 26:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, pleasure. Until next time, remember, do your part by doing your best.

• 26:36Speaker 05

  GLP-1s are changing weight loss.

• 26:38Speaker 06

  My sister had amazing.

• 26:39Speaker 05

  The ideal treatment is.

• 26:41Speaker 03

  Seems like everyone's a GLP-1 expert these days. But when it comes to your health, it pays to listen to someone who actually is. Orderly Meds makes it easy to get started with personalized support along the way. And with your first month's order, we're giving you the second month free. Visit OrderlyMeds.com. Bringing orders to the chaos of GLP-1s. Individual results may vary. Eligibility and prescription required. Not medical advice. Visit OrderlyMeds.com for details. Compound and medications are not FDA approved.

• 27:06Speaker 07

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