2517: The Pain You Choose

We have a complicated relationship with pain. We avoid it, delay it, and try to outsmart it—yet somehow end up choosing more of it in the long run. This episode explores why comfort is so seductive, why procrastination feels rational in the moment, and why pain is unavoidable no matter what we do. The real question isn’t whether we’ll experience pain—but which kind. You’ll hear why too many choices exhaust us, how daily renegotiation drains time and energy, and why removing choice altogether can be the most freeing move you make. This conversation introduces the idea of “Zero Options”—a simple but demanding approach to money, wellbeing, relationships, and peace of mind that replaces willpower with systems and execution. Pain now, or pain later. Structure, or regret. The choice is simpler than it looks. George’s newest book is available! Get your copy of The Meaningful Few here: https://amzn.to/4qA26X9 Feeling busy but unfulfilled? The Meaningful Few helps you identify what truly matters, eliminate distractions, and live with intention and clarity. Learn more here: MyMeaningfulFew.comWant to say “Thanks!” You can buy us a cup of coffee.https://www.buymeacoffee.com/lifebloodThanks, as always for listening! If you got some value and enjoyed the show, please leave us a review here:​​https://ratethispodcast.com/lifebloodpodcastCopyright LifeBlood 2026.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:43Speaker 01

  We humans have this interesting relationship with pain. We don't like it. We do not like pain. We don't want it. We want to avoid it. We prefer comfort and pleasure over pain, but we all certainly intellectually understand that it is necessary, it is a prerequisite for a lot of the things that we really want. It is a necessary thing. We need pain to get rid of pain sometimes. Pain is required to avoid future pain. Sometimes pain is the only way to get through pain that we've already endured. So, interesting. Take current pain.

• 1:28Speaker 01

  If you've got tennis elbow, like I sometimes have, or maybe it's golfer's elbow or whatever, there's a pain in my forearm. And oddly enough, one of the successful effective interventions is using some kind of a massager, like a Theragun type thing, which is what I use. And the use of that is extremely uncomfortable, but it works. It's amazing. Arm hurts. The application of massager hurts maybe even more, but temporarily because it actually makes the pain go away. Being overweight, that can be emotionally painful.

• 2:12Speaker 01

  You don't feel good about yourself. You feel like crap. You even feel lethargic. Or if you are extremely overweight, there's lots of different health considerations, rather concerns, that are either afflicting you, or certainly will. And of course, the path out of that pain often involves pain. It's discomfort. It requires exercise, which can be uncomfortable and painful. It requires restraint, which can be emotionally painful. Forgiving those things that you want. Hunger requires effort, all of these things. So, then, there is pain now to reduce pain later. So that's the idea of future pain.

• 2:57Speaker 01

  I try and be kind to my current self, but I also want to keep an eye on my future self as well, because, God willing, one day, I will be an even older version of me. I'll have more gray in my beard and maybe some gray in my hair. I'm sure that that's the case. And I know that that future version of me will be grateful to this current version of me for engaging in certain kinds of activities that are beneficial. So, for example, spending less hurts. So, saving money also hurts. Putting money into my 401K instead of buying a Porsche hurts.

• 3:42Speaker 01

  Putting money into my 401K or an IRA instead of going on that trip that I want to do can be painful. It's painful to downsize. It's painful to not increase.

• 3:55Speaker 01

  Lifestyle and spending as I make more money, but I recognize that that pain now temporary momentary is worth it because I don't want to have to endure or live in crappy circumstances later because we do recognize that. We don't want the pain of regret. We don't want the pain of being 80 years old and flat broke where I'm out of options, cold, totally out of options. Because right now I have a lot of energy. Will I have that same energy at 60, 70, 80, 90? Doubtful. So it benefits me to engage in uncomfortable

• 4:40Speaker 01

  stuff today. I don't want the pain of dependency. I want to have dignity as an older person. And in order to do that, I must endure some discomfort, pain today. So again, pain now or pain later. And then there's past pain. So we all know if you've got some kind of trauma in your life, if you had this imperfect childhood as all of us did, and if it's bad enough, if it's bad enough, it could be holding you back, could be hindering you in the form of some kind of a limiting belief, whatever it might be. And it doesn't go away on its own, ignoring it's not going to make it go away, it just makes it worse. We drive

• 5:21Speaker 01

  it down, it gets worse. It doesn't go away. It fades only when we bring that to the surface, examine it, work through it, do the work as the saying goes. And that process certainly never comfortable, rarely is that comfortable. Healing often hurts more than avoidance, at least at first. So here's a strange thing. It's unavoidable. Pain is an unavoidable part of life. It is a future, not a bug. So the only question is which kind are you willing to slash interested in living with? And that's why comfort is such a seductive,

• 6:02Speaker 01

  nefarious, sinister thing because it says, you don't have to deal with that right now. It whispers in your ear. That pain will still be there tomorrow, won't it? It'll be there tomorrow. So rest, you rest, sit down, put your feet up, scroll, order that pizza. Great.

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• 7:26Speaker 01

  And, so we procrastinate. We skip the gym. We put off that conversation. We delay making those contributions to those accounts that we need, and we tell ourselves a very human lie. I'll deal with that later. And here's where it gets interesting, because you've probably heard that the avoidance of pain is roughly twice as powerful as the pursuit of pleasure, which is, in a way, a paradox, because if we truly wanted to avoid pain, we wouldn't overspend, we wouldn't overeat, we wouldn't underexercise. Yet here we are, collectively, overspending, overeating, underexercising. How very, very, very human of us. But what's really going on here?

• 8:09Speaker 01

  I don't think it's weakness, certainly not ignorance, and I don't think that it's necessarily a lack of motivation. I think it's overwhelm. We've got way too much coming at us, way too much coming at us all the time. We have too many options. We're trying to make too many decisions. We're giving ourselves too many chances to negotiate with ourselves, with this internal, inner terrorist that lives inside of each of us, who says, "That'll all be here tomorrow. You do you today. You've earned it. Whatever, you deserve it." And when you act like that, every day becomes a referendum. Should I work out or not? Should I save or not? Should I be present or distracted?

• 8:53Speaker 01

  And eventually, you know what's going to win out? Your exhaustion from decision fatigue. Like, oh, my God, enough. It's not going to do anything. I choose nothing.

• 9:06Speaker 01

  So here's the alternative. Less choice, not more willpower, not more motivation, less choice. Maybe even, maybe even, zero options. So instead of asking, do I feel like doing this today? You say, I already decided. The verdict is in. So here's what that looks like. From a financial standpoint, if I decided that I want to retire at age 65, I've done the math. I know I need to save $1,000 a month in my 401K.

• 9:41Speaker 01

  So what did I do? I budgeted, I set up automatic contributions, and now it's done. Done. There's not a debate. I'm not making a daily decision or a weekly or monthly decision. I don't need any willpower. I just did it. What about your well-being? I've decided I'm going to be a healthy person. Not someday, not eventually, right now. So what did I do? I schedule my workouts. I meal prep on Sundays. I remove the question of if and replace it with when. So now I just follow my plan. I execute. What about our relationships? I've decided I want strong relationships with my wife and kids.

• 10:26Speaker 01

  And I know that doesn't happen on its own or accidentally. So what do I do? I schedule one-on-one time with each one of them. It goes on the calendar, and I protect that.

• 10:38Speaker 01

  So the decision is made, the structure is put in place, and now I don't have to think about what it is that I'm going to do. I simply execute. And that's not rigidity, that's a relief. I've made a plan. I understand what it takes to do it. I've scheduled it, calendared it, put it into action, and then I execute. Because calm, clarity, contentment doesn't come from comfort. It comes from decisions that have already been made. And pain doesn't disappear when we avoid it. It compounds. And comfort isn't the absence of pain. It's pain deferred with interest. Which means, in the end, we're always choosing pain.

• 11:23Speaker 01

  So the only question is whether we choose it intentionally, upfront, and in service of what matters, or accidentally, later, in service of comfort.

• 11:38Speaker 01

  So, in service of helping you, if this is of interest to you, to figure out where it is that you are choosing comfort and avoiding pain in service of avoiding pain, which we now know, which you already did, I just reminded you, that doesn't work. I created this Zero Options Audit, and you can go in the notes of today's episode, click on it, you will find that audit. So it's just a one-page worksheet, and it'll help you look at your life and figure out, okay, where am I giving myself too many choices, too many options? Where am I bailing out and choosing comfort over enduring that little bit of pain?

• 12:22Speaker 01

  So I avoid lots of pain. Because procrastination is just a worse version of pain. Pain is unavoidable. Procrastination is just a worse version of it.

• 12:40Speaker 01

  Just wrote a book called The Meaningful Few: Designing a Life That Works. You can find that on Amazon. You can also go to mymeaningfulfew.com and check out some additional resources that I've put together and developed, all in service of helping a human being, me, maybe you, get what you want. Because that's what I want. I want you to get what you want. And by doing that, I am confident my vote, my wager, my bet, is that that will help you to do your part by doing your best.

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