Dec Tattoos Ant - It’s T-Day!!

The wait is over. The boys are back. It’s T-Day you silly gooses But before the BIG REVEAL, Ant and Dec catch up on their summers, after a few weeks off; Ant’s been eating barnacles and Dec’s been eating contraband. They also enjoy your tattoo fails - one which has Ant howling. The screams don’t stop there, as we take you to the live inking of Ant’s listener designed tattoo… What’s the final design? Where is Ant getting it? And WHO is doing the tattoo?? We’re heading out on the road for a couple of weeks and bringing you with us for a bit of Life On The Road, Eh? Please keep your correspondence, your car games, your tattoo fails and grumbles coming to [email protected] ----- 00:00 - Coming Up 00:33 - We’re back, baby! 02:20 - Dec’s Confession 07:30 - Remembering Dolly Parton 13:20 - Holiday Bingo 15:45 - Guerrilla Marketing 19:51 - Your Tattoo Fails 27:22 - The Tattoo Tombola 31:44 - Dec Tattoos Ant 37:45 - Ant’s Tattoo Reveal 44:49 - Respect, Guys Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 1:30Ant McPartlin?

  Coming up on the show. Tea Day has arrived!

• 1:33Declan Donnelly?

  The wait is finally over.

• 1:35Ant McPartlin?

  Yes! Deck is a wanted man as he shares his criminal confession.

• 1:41Declan Donnelly?

  And is ve-ve-ve-ve sorry.

• 1:44Ant McPartlin?

  Shut up! We howl at your tattoo fails.

• 1:48Declan Donnelly?

  And are very impressed with your gorilla marketing.

• 1:51Ant McPartlin?

  I finally show you the winning tattoo design.

• 1:55Declan Donnelly?

  Which I then get to ink.

• 1:58Ant McPartlin?

  Enjoy the show!

• 2:03Ant McPartlin?

  Oh! We're back! Back, T-D! You beauty!

• 2:09Declan Donnelly?

  It's so good to be back!

• 2:11Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah! Yeah, you beauty!

• 2:15Declan Donnelly?

  Hello, everybody.

• 2:16Ant McPartlin?

  Hi!

• 2:17Declan Donnelly?

  Welcome, good morning, good evening, welcome back to the hangout. We're back in the hangout for another hanging out with him and me. Could be back, innit?

• 2:23Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, it's great to be back.

• 2:24Declan Donnelly?

  I'm so excited to be back.

• 2:25Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, we might talk a lot and gobble and just talk over one another again. Because we're excited to be here.

• 2:32Declan Donnelly?

  Hooray!

• 2:33Ant McPartlin?

  It's nice to see you all.

• 2:34Declan Donnelly?

  We've missed you all, we've got a few weeks off, but we're back to it now.

• 2:37Ant McPartlin?

  And the good thing is, it's a very exciting day today. Not only are we back, but it's Tea Day!

• 2:43Declan Donnelly?

  It's Tea Day!

• 2:44Ant McPartlin?

  Tattoo day! Tattoo day!

• 2:46Declan Donnelly?

  Get your tats out. Nice tats.

• 2:48Ant McPartlin?

  Lovely tats.

• 2:50Declan Donnelly?

  That is gonna be happening, what has happened?

• 2:52Ant McPartlin?

  It's happened, happened last night. Late last night.

• 2:54Declan Donnelly?

  So we will reveal it, it's under here somewhere.

• 2:57Ant McPartlin?

  Yes, it is.

• 2:57Declan Donnelly?

  That's so.

• 2:59Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, don't punch it.

• 3:02Ant McPartlin?

  Exactly, yeah, it's not too bad. It's not too bad.

• 3:04Declan Donnelly?

  We'll be having a look at that a little bit later in the show.

• 3:07Ant McPartlin?

  She was a very good tattooist. And things were going really well until I had an unpleasant surprise halfway through.

• 3:16Declan Donnelly?

  That'll be me!

• 3:17Ant McPartlin?

  That will be him. Deck turned up halfway through and things didn't go to plan. But I'll show you later.

• 3:24Declan Donnelly?

  Can't have Tea Day.

• 3:25Ant McPartlin?

  Without D-Day. You can't have a Tea Day without D-Day.

• 3:29Declan Donnelly?

  Without D-Day.

• 3:30Ant McPartlin?

  Without D-Day being there.

• 3:32Declan Donnelly?

  So we had some fun, we had a laugh.

• 3:34Ant McPartlin?

  We did, we did have a laugh.

• 3:35Declan Donnelly?

  We'll have a look at your tats later.

• 3:36Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, get your tattoos.

• 3:37Declan Donnelly?

  Get your tats out later.

• 3:38Ant McPartlin?

  How you been?

• 3:39Declan Donnelly?

  Good, really good. Couple of weeks off, had a little trip away. In all honesty, though.

• 3:44Ant McPartlin?

  Are you arrested?

• 3:45Declan Donnelly?

  No, I'm not arrested at all.

• 3:47Ant McPartlin?

  Absolutely not.

• 3:48Declan Donnelly?

  Not arrested. And also, I nearly got arrested.

• 3:52Ant McPartlin?

  What do you mean?

• 3:52Declan Donnelly?

  I nearly didn't make it here today.

• 3:54Ant McPartlin?

  Why?

• 3:55Declan Donnelly?

  I nearly got arrested yesterday.

• 3:58Declan Donnelly?

  I nearly got arrested yesterday.

• 4:00Ant McPartlin?

  What do you mean nearly got arrested?

• 4:01Declan Donnelly?

  Well, I could have got arrested yesterday. I broke the law yesterday.

• 4:04Ant McPartlin?

  Did you? So you should have got arrested yesterday.

• 4:06Declan Donnelly?

  I should have got arrested yesterday.

• 4:07Ant McPartlin?

  Can we still get him arrested? I don't even know what he's doing.

• 4:09Declan Donnelly?

  Well, you could do. This is tantamount to a confession that I'm just about to give you here. So I was on the way back, I had a few days away in Cornwall.

• 4:17Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 4:18Declan Donnelly?

  On the way back, on the drive back, long drive back from Cornwall, a long way away from London. We stopped off halfway for a little bit of a wee, get a sandwich. And went in, had my wee. And then me and the current Mrs. Donnelly went to M&S. We like stopping at the services with an M&S.

• 4:34Ant McPartlin?

  Right.

• 4:34Declan Donnelly?

  Because it's a nice, it's a nice place.

• 4:36Ant McPartlin?

  You know what you're getting.

• 4:37Declan Donnelly?

  You know what you're getting with the M&S. Good sandwiches. So we're going, we pick our sandwiches, pick our little bag of crisps, pick a little sweet treat for afterwards.

• 4:45Ant McPartlin?

  So far, none of this is arrest material. None of this is criminal, it's not a criminal act.

• 4:51Declan Donnelly?

  We stick in a little bang bang chicken to share, take it to the self-service checkout.

• 4:55Ant McPartlin?

  He's so rock and roll.

• 4:58Declan Donnelly?

  So I start bleeping it. Bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep, bleep. I haven't got a bag, it's too much to carry, I'm gonna have to get a bag for life. So I get one of the bags, bleep that, put everything in the bag, bleep my Sparks card.

• 5:08Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 5:10Declan Donnelly?

  And then I just walk off.

• 5:12Ant McPartlin?

  What do you mean?

• 5:12Declan Donnelly?

  I just walked off. Put everything in the bag, bleep my Sparks card.

• 5:17Ant McPartlin?

  You didn't pay for it!

• 5:18Declan Donnelly?

  Didn't pay for anything.

• 5:19Ant McPartlin?

  What?

• 5:20Declan Donnelly?

  I know!

• 5:21Ant McPartlin?

  Declan Donnelly is a thief! There's the thumbnail right there!

• 5:25Declan Donnelly?

  Put it all in my bag and wandered off.

• 5:28Ant McPartlin?

  So when did you realise?

• 5:30Declan Donnelly?

  As I was tucking into me egg and maple bacon sandwich.

• 5:35Ant McPartlin?

  Egg and eggs, egg and bacon sandwich, three pack sandwich! Dirty criminal git!

• 5:41Declan Donnelly?

  As I was tucking into me sandwich, I turned to the current Mrs. Donnelly.

• 5:45Ant McPartlin?

  You're a thief!

• 5:46Declan Donnelly?

  And I said, with a mouthful of egg and bacon sandwich, I went, I haven't paid for this! She went, what do you mean? What do you mean? I went, I haven't paid for it. I bleep my Sparks card and I just left.

• 6:00Ant McPartlin?

  So what happens now?

• 6:02Declan Donnelly?

  Well, so we're on the road.

• 6:04Ant McPartlin?

  Did it, did it, down, did it, did it, here come the police.

• 6:10Declan Donnelly?

  So I'm on the road, like, what the heck am I gonna do here? Because I'm not turning around to go and pay for it.

• 6:16Ant McPartlin?

  No.

• 6:17Declan Donnelly?

  So I had to ring the services.

• 6:20Ant McPartlin?

  Did you?

• 6:20Declan Donnelly?

  Rang the services.

• 6:22Ant McPartlin?

  And said?

• 6:23Declan Donnelly?

  Couldn't get through, first of all. Ringing out, so then I get on the phone to the office. So the girl's in the office and I say, I'm really, I have just shoplifted from Bridgewater Services.

• 6:37Declan Donnelly?

  My heart rate is slightly raised, I think I'm gonna get arrested. Because they know it was me, they knew it was me.

• 6:42Ant McPartlin?

  Of course.

• 6:43Declan Donnelly?

  So.

• 6:43Ant McPartlin?

  Those are the most recognisable men in Britain. Can't get away with this behaviour.

• 6:49Declan Donnelly?

  So they rang the services and they said, Deck's just been in, he's just shoplifted.

• 6:57Declan Donnelly?

  He's currently eating the spoils of his endeavours.

• 7:01Ant McPartlin?

  Egg, with one of which was egg?

• 7:04Ant McPartlin?

  Maple bacon and egg?

• 7:05Declan Donnelly?

  What can, what can we do to resolve the situation? And they said, thank you for your honesty, but honestly, there's nothing we can do now. But please make a donation to our charity. So in the end, I made a donation to M&S's partner charity for slightly more than actually than the sandwiches cost, but.

• 7:22Ant McPartlin?

  Slightly more. Slightly more, ever so slightly more.

• 7:26Declan Donnelly?

  I made a donation to charity to cover.

• 7:29Ant McPartlin?

  So you should.

• 7:29Declan Donnelly?

  The sandwiches.

• 7:30Ant McPartlin?

  Criminal.

• 7:30Declan Donnelly?

  So I am slightly out of pocket because it was more than me sandwiches were.

• 7:34Ant McPartlin?

  So that was Bridgewater Services, so you've rectified things with them.

• 7:37Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 7:38Ant McPartlin?

  M&S, on the other hand.

• 7:39Declan Donnelly?

  M&S.

• 7:40Ant McPartlin?

  Have they been in touch?

• 7:41Declan Donnelly?

  They haven't been in touch just yet.

• 7:42Ant McPartlin?

  They were gonna be a sponsor of this podcast, not anymore.

• 7:46Declan Donnelly?

  Well, inadvertently.

• 7:46Ant McPartlin?

  They were talking big money as well.

• 7:48Declan Donnelly?

  They, they sponsored my journey back from Cornwall, which was very good of them. But yeah, so, I mean.

• 7:55Ant McPartlin?

  Well done, well done, you criminal. Well done.

• 7:57Declan Donnelly?

  I feel bad, is that, is that.

• 7:58Ant McPartlin?

  Well, no, you've rectified it.

• 8:00Declan Donnelly?

  Have I got, so I don't have a criminal record now?

• 8:02Ant McPartlin?

  No, because you weren't arrested.

• 8:03Declan Donnelly?

  Okay, that's good. As long as I've rectified it.

• 8:05Ant McPartlin?

  Yes, well done.

• 8:06Declan Donnelly?

  Like, still getting to America.

• 8:07Ant McPartlin?

  Yes, you can still.

• 8:09Declan Donnelly?

  Good.

• 8:10Ant McPartlin?

  And Canada.

• 8:10Declan Donnelly?

  And Canada.

• 8:11Ant McPartlin?

  Imagine, that was it, that you couldn't film overseas because of this.

• 8:14Declan Donnelly?

  Imagine I couldn't go to Canada for the new series of I'm a Celebrity.

• 8:18Ant McPartlin?

  You'd be gutted!

• 8:19Declan Donnelly?

  Because I stole an egg sandwich from Marks and Spencer's.

• 8:21Ant McPartlin?

  Because imagine what the maple bacon like, is like in Canada.

• 8:24Declan Donnelly?

  Oh my god, I hadn't thought of that.

• 8:25Ant McPartlin?

  And the size of the eggs.

• 8:26Declan Donnelly?

  Oh my goodness.

• 8:27Ant McPartlin?

  Free range chickens, you're gonna lose your mind!

• 8:31Ant McPartlin?

  Is Cornwall a long drive, though?

• 8:33Declan Donnelly?

  It is long.

• 8:33Ant McPartlin?

  What was it?

• 8:35Declan Donnelly?

  Well, we got there in about four and a half hours.

• 8:37Ant McPartlin?

  That's not bad.

• 8:37Declan Donnelly?

  Which wasn't bad. Hit some traffic on the way back, six hours.

• 8:41Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, I see.

• 8:42Declan Donnelly?

  And you know what it's like, those holiday.

• 8:44Ant McPartlin?

  It took me less than that to get to Portugal!

• 8:45Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah. And, and the thing is, the drive to your holiday, you don't mind it being a bit longer because you're going on holiday.

• 8:52Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 8:52Declan Donnelly?

  When you just wanna get back.

• 8:53Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 8:53Declan Donnelly?

  And you've got loads of dirty washing in the back. And you've got all your stuff.

• 8:57Ant McPartlin?

  And you've stolen sandwiches.

• 8:58Declan Donnelly?

  And you've stolen some food from M&S. And we had the really sad news last week that Dolly Parton had passed away.

• 9:04Ant McPartlin?

  Passed away, yeah.

• 9:05Declan Donnelly?

  Really, really sad. And that reminded me of, actually, those drives when I was a kid. Because the drive up to Stranraer to get the boat to Larn.

• 9:14Ant McPartlin?

  You drive from Newcastle?

• 9:14Declan Donnelly?

  We drive from Newcastle to Stranraer, which is in kind of the northwest of Scotland.

• 9:18Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 9:18Declan Donnelly?

  We get on the boat there over to Larn and we always had Dolly Parton on the.

• 9:23Ant McPartlin?

  Did you?

• 9:23Declan Donnelly?

  On the cassette player.

• 9:24Ant McPartlin?

  Really?

• 9:25Declan Donnelly?

  Yes, we'd always have a bit of Jolene. We always had loads of.

• 9:27Ant McPartlin?

  My mum loved Dolly Parton.

• 9:29Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, she was brilliant.

• 9:30Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, my god, she was always on in our house, growing up.

• 9:33Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah. She was so brilliant, though.

• 9:35Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, she was.

• 9:36Declan Donnelly?

  As a, as a performer, as a songwriter, she was just incredible. And she was kind of one of those figures of my childhood that she was always on in our house.

• 9:46Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 9:47Declan Donnelly?

  So it's another one of those people that they pass on and they really kind of affect you in a way.

• 9:54Ant McPartlin?

  And it makes you think, because it puts you back to times in your life where you remember seeing her or listening to her or watching her.

• 10:00Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, an incredible lady.

• 10:01Ant McPartlin?

  Sad news.

• 10:02Declan Donnelly?

  Really sad. R.I.P. Dolly.

• 10:06Declan Donnelly?

  How've you been?

• 10:07Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, good.

• 10:08Declan Donnelly?

  Summer been fun?

• 10:09Ant McPartlin?

  It has been fun. It's, I've said it before on this pod.

• 10:12Declan Donnelly?

  It's tiring, isn't it?

• 10:13Ant McPartlin?

  It's tiring. And do you know what? It's, what is, I'm knackered. I've got 20-year-old, 18-year-old and a two-and-a-half-year-old. And that age gap, whoa, that's tough to holiday. That's a tough holiday.

• 10:26Declan Donnelly?

  The older ones are going out at night?

• 10:27Ant McPartlin?

  The older ones going out.

• 10:28Declan Donnelly?

  The little ones getting up early in the morning?

• 10:29Ant McPartlin?

  Getting up early.

• 10:30Declan Donnelly?

  Wow.

• 10:30Ant McPartlin?

  So you're, you're, so you can't help but, you know, you, even though you go to bed as parents of, you know, teenagers and 20-somethings, you go like, yeah, enjoy yourself. You know, be safe, be responsible. You've still got an eye on your phone. You know, there was a couple of times where I had to get out of bed and jump in the car and go and pick them up as well. And then get up with him in the morning. So, um, yeah, to anyone who is listening, who's got that age gap with their kids, it's knackered, isn't it? It's bloody, it's knackered enough with a two-and-a-half-year-old, but when you've got teenagers and 20-somethings still in the mix, jeez.

• 11:06Declan Donnelly?

  I was gonna say, is it like, is that all parents? Just all parents are frazzled during the summer holidays?

• 11:12Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, I think so. Yeah. I don't think we get to the end of the summer holidays and go, oh, I'm well rested. I feel great.

• 11:19Declan Donnelly?

  You said it to me last night, like, I can't wait to go back to work for a rest.

• 11:22Ant McPartlin?

  It's true, isn't it?

• 11:23Declan Donnelly?

  It is a bit of that.

• 11:24Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. It is. We went, so we went to Portugal for, um, our summer holidays and me, on our wedding anniversary, uh, me and, uh, my wife went to Lisbon for a weekend. We thought, do you know what? We're gonna, we're gonna do it. Everybody stayed in the, in the villa, all the rest of the family, and we're only a couple of hours away. What a cool city.

• 11:43Declan Donnelly?

  Was it?

• 11:43Ant McPartlin?

  It's one of the best places I've ever been to.

• 11:45Declan Donnelly?

  I've never been to Lisbon.

• 11:46Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, it's amazing. Like, all the shops are really cool, great coffee shops, good art, good, like, food markets. They've got, like, a Christ the Redeemer statue there, like a smaller version. And what looks like the Golden Gate Bridge, doesn't it? Have you ever been? It is, I loved, I loved it. And we're like, oh, isn't this nice? Just us two. We're having a nice time. I had a little bit of a lie-in till eight o'clock in the morning on Saturday. Woo, can you believe it?

• 12:09Declan Donnelly?

  Sexy and nice.

• 12:10Ant McPartlin?

  And then done just nice, lovely anniversary-style stuff. I'll leave that up to your imagination. And then it got to.

• 12:19Declan Donnelly?

  Please don't. My imagination is out running wild.

• 12:23Ant McPartlin?

  It's a good image though, right? Uh, we, so we'd stayed the Friday night, went out for dinner. I had barnacles on toast.

• 12:30Declan Donnelly?

  Shut up.

• 12:30Ant McPartlin?

  I did?

• 12:31Declan Donnelly?

  You did not.

• 12:32Ant McPartlin?

  I swear to God I did. The guy came out. So we were sat on this rooftop restaurant, right? And the view was that small Christ the Redeemer statue in this, what looked like the Golden Gate Bridge, and you've got the, the river there. And the sun was going down, the most beautiful setting. And it, it was a fish restaurant. And he said, um, the specials today are, and he said it in Portuguese. And I said, what is that in English? He went, I think it is barnacles. I went, barnacles on toast? And barnacles on toast. Go on then, I'll try it. Tremendous.

• 13:02Declan Donnelly?

  What do barnacles taste like?

• 13:03Ant McPartlin?

  They taste like a mushroom. No, they don't. It's just like chicken. Like a mushroom, but like a soy mushroom.

• 13:09Declan Donnelly?

  A sog, a sog, a soggy?

• 13:10Ant McPartlin?

  Soy, like a soy sauce. Soy.

• 13:12Declan Donnelly?

  Soy?

• 13:12Ant McPartlin?

  Soy. So it's my accent. Soy. Soy.

• 13:15Declan Donnelly?

  I thought you said soggy.

• 13:16Ant McPartlin?

  Soy.

• 13:16Declan Donnelly?

  Soy. Soggy.

• 13:18Ant McPartlin?

  Soy.

• 13:18Declan Donnelly?

  Soy.

• 13:19Ant McPartlin?

  Soy.

• 13:20Declan Donnelly?

  Soy.

• 13:21Ant McPartlin?

  Soy. Soy.

• 13:22Declan Donnelly?

  Soy.

• 13:23Ant McPartlin?

  What are you saying?

• 13:24Declan Donnelly?

  Soy.

• 13:25Ant McPartlin?

  Why are you going soy like that? Why don't you have to say the mouth?

• 13:28Declan Donnelly?

  How do you say soy?

• 13:30Ant McPartlin?

  Soy. Yeah, they say it like that because they're southerners. Soy. Soy sauce.

• 13:36Declan Donnelly?

  Sorry sauce.

• 13:38Ant McPartlin?

  I'm not sorry. Soy sauce. Anyway, back to, I had barnacles on toast, which was tremendous.

• 13:44Declan Donnelly?

  What would you rate them in bananas?

• 13:46Ant McPartlin?

  Uh, I would rate them out of eight, seven. They were that, they were that good.

• 13:51Declan Donnelly?

  And what would you rate them out of barnacles?

• 13:55Ant McPartlin?

  Well, what do you rate? But I don't know what the world record is for eating barnacles.

• 13:58Declan Donnelly?

  I don't know. Hey, I wish I could, uh, ask Willy-Nilly about that. Is there a barnacle eating?

• 14:01Ant McPartlin?

  There'll be a lot because they're quick, quick and easy.

• 14:04Declan Donnelly?

  What do they look like?

• 14:04Ant McPartlin?

  My point, my point was, I've had me soy sauce tasting barnacles.

• 14:11Ant McPartlin?

  The next day we spent all day shopping, went to this lovely food market. And then, even though we moaned about being tired, we went home early because we missed the kids.

• 14:19Declan Donnelly?

  Oh.

• 14:22Ant McPartlin?

  Kids, doesn't help your tiredness though, does it?

• 14:24Declan Donnelly?

  No, it doesn't.

• 14:25Ant McPartlin?

  You're like, oh, we could, we could stay another night, but we could just drive home because we missed the kids.

• 14:28Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, I'm sorry.

• 14:32Ant McPartlin?

  Swear to God. Pixelate that. Pixelate that. Pixelate that.

• 14:38Ant McPartlin?

  Soy sauce. Ah, good. Ha ha. An aeroplane just flown in and hit deck right in the arm and he deserved it.

• 14:45Declan Donnelly?

  What do you say?

• 14:46Ant McPartlin?

  Soy.

• 14:47Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, soy. Yeah, thank you. I've got a, a paper aeroplane just flown in here from the direction of Heckless Corner. Oh, do you remember we played, um, uh, Holiday Bingo?

• 15:00Ant McPartlin?

  Yes.

• 15:00Declan Donnelly?

  In our holiday shows.

• 15:01Ant McPartlin?

  I want to talk about that.

• 15:02Declan Donnelly?

  Well, we had, uh, one Holiday Bingo email that really tickled us. It says, hi, Andec, Isla here.

• 15:08Ant McPartlin?

  Oh.

• 15:08Declan Donnelly?

  Not my Isla, I don't think. You mentioned meeting people from your hometown while on holiday. Well, I was at a F1 Grand Prix in Singapore in a crowd of 300,000 people. And who happened to be in the same stand several seats away?

• 15:21Ant McPartlin?

  Chris Hemsworth.

• 15:23Declan Donnelly?

  No, her ex.

• 15:25Ant McPartlin?

  No way.

• 15:27Declan Donnelly?

  Isla's ex. She hadn't seen him for 35 years. And to be honest, I was not in a rush to meet and greet him ever again.

• 15:34Ant McPartlin?

  Oh.

• 15:35Declan Donnelly?

  That is so unfortunate. 300,000 people and your ex is in there.

• 15:38Ant McPartlin?

  No, thank you.

• 15:39Declan Donnelly?

  That's a rotten bit of luck that is.

• 15:41Ant McPartlin?

  I've got a holiday bingo though. Um, you know, we said one of them was injuries, holiday injury.

• 15:47Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, yeah.

• 15:48Ant McPartlin?

  And do you remember at the end of one of the pods that we did on holiday?

• 15:52Declan Donnelly?

  Oh.

• 15:52Ant McPartlin?

  I fell over the chair.

• 15:53Declan Donnelly?

  You kicked, uh, did, did you fall over it or kick something?

• 15:56Ant McPartlin?

  I kicked the chair then fell over.

• 15:57Declan Donnelly?

  That's right, yes. Remember that? Great moment. Got a lot of retention online.

• 16:01Ant McPartlin?

  That was five weeks ago, four weeks ago. Have a look at this. Right?

• 16:05Declan Donnelly?

  Go on.

• 16:05Ant McPartlin?

  Taking off my shoe.

• 16:06Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 16:07Ant McPartlin?

  Have a look at me toe. Second toe.

• 16:09Declan Donnelly?

  Oh my God. What's happened there?

• 16:14Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, put it away. That is rotten.

• 16:17Ant McPartlin?

  It's not rotten, it's broken.

• 16:20Declan Donnelly?

  No, that's bad.

• 16:21Ant McPartlin?

  It's bad, isn't it? So I saw someone, they went, it's definitely broken. There's not a lot you can do about it because you're gonna keep hitting it. Try and strap it up. So I strapped it up. But I strapped it up, I kept hitting it more because it was like strapped and protruded more.

• 16:33Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 16:34Ant McPartlin?

  So I just kept, I thought, I'm no doctor, but it seems to me the strapping is making it worse.

• 16:40Declan Donnelly?

  Right.

• 16:41Ant McPartlin?

  So I've unstrapped it and now it's just loose.

• 16:43Declan Donnelly?

  So you're just gonna have an eternal broken toe?

• 16:45Ant McPartlin?

  But look how fat it is.

• 16:46Declan Donnelly?

  It's really fat. It's like a little chip of lot of sausage.

• 16:49Ant McPartlin?

  It's never, I, I mean, I'm not getting this out on camera because I don't want WikiFeet to make money off my, uh, my rating will go down. That's right.

• 16:55Declan Donnelly?

  Finally, I might overtake him.

• 16:56Ant McPartlin?

  I don't want deck to beat me. But look how fat it is.

• 16:59Declan Donnelly?

  It is a fat little sausage, isn't it?

• 17:01Ant McPartlin?

  What a little chip of lot of that is.

• 17:03Declan Donnelly?

  It really is.

• 17:04Ant McPartlin?

  I don't know what to do. I'm just gonna leave it now.

• 17:07Declan Donnelly?

  Your feet are nice and brown though.

• 17:08Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, thanks. They're nice.

• 17:09Declan Donnelly?

  Nice brown feet.

• 17:10Ant McPartlin?

  I like a tanned foot, don't you?

• 17:11Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, it's good. It looks nice.

• 17:12Ant McPartlin?

  It says, I've been on holiday.

• 17:16Ant McPartlin?

  Ah.

• 17:17Declan Donnelly?

  In comes another paper plane from Heckless Corner.

• 17:20Ant McPartlin?

  Tried to catch it, didn't catch it. Oh, look at this one. Oh, oh, I've ripped it. Sorry, guys.

• 17:25Declan Donnelly?

  Sorry, sorry, guys.

• 17:26Ant McPartlin?

  Sorry, guys. Sorry, it's been a couple of weeks. Hey, guys and girls.

• 17:30Declan Donnelly?

  Hey.

• 17:31Ant McPartlin?

  Myself and my husband Dan, with son Todd, went on our first ever cruise for our holiday this week to the Norwegian fjords.

• 17:38Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, lovely.

• 17:39Ant McPartlin?

  I'd love to do that. And I thought, what better, that's me saying that, by the way. In brackets, I'd love to do that.

• 17:45Declan Donnelly?

  Ever been?

• 17:45Ant McPartlin?

  Back to them. Never been. Love to go. I went, been to Norway as a kid. I told you this. I told you this.

• 17:51Declan Donnelly?

  Your auntie.

• 17:52Ant McPartlin?

  Barrett.

• 17:52Declan Donnelly?

  Barrett. Auntie Barrett.

• 17:54Ant McPartlin?

  Who wasn't my auntie.

• 17:55Declan Donnelly?

  It's his mum's friend.

• 17:56Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, mum's friend. Uh, anyway, back to the letter.

• 18:01Ant McPartlin?

  Uh, I thought, what better opportunity?

• 18:03Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 18:04Ant McPartlin?

  Than with a ship holding 8,000 people to do some guerrilla marketing?

• 18:09Declan Donnelly?

  Great idea, Barrett.

• 18:10Ant McPartlin?

  So, I, so this is a, I proudly made a magnet to stick on our door for all to see. Keep doing what you're doing, you silly gusses. Love and respect, Sarah. That is brilliant, Sarah. That is brilliant. So that's her room. Oh my God, there's a lot of rooms on that ship, isn't there?

• 18:28Declan Donnelly?

  8,000 people?

• 18:29Ant McPartlin?

  8,000. That's room 14,623. Wow.

• 18:34Declan Donnelly?

  Wow.

• 18:34Ant McPartlin?

  14,000. Look, it says 14 dot 623. I'm in room 14,632.

• 18:42Declan Donnelly?

  Gotta take your room number.

• 18:43Ant McPartlin?

  How long will that room service be? Seven hours?

• 18:47Ant McPartlin?

  Got another one here. Hi, guys.

• 18:49Declan Donnelly?

  Hi.

• 18:50Ant McPartlin?

  Hi, Hecklers Corner, too.

• 18:53Ant McPartlin?

  Sasha and Ian from Dumfries here.

• 18:56Declan Donnelly?

  Hi, Sasha and Ian.

• 18:57Ant McPartlin?

  As we are at the Kendall Colin Festival, I thought it was a perfect opportunity to advertise the pod. I created a poster and I pegged it to the back of the chairs. Respect, guys. Sasha and Ian.

• 19:11Ant McPartlin?

  That is brilliant.

• 19:12Declan Donnelly?

  That is exactly what she's done. She's got a poster there and it's pegged to the back of a camping chair at the festival.

• 19:17Ant McPartlin?

  Exactly what it says on the tape.

• 19:19Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 19:19Ant McPartlin?

  Do you know, but that was, that's exactly the kind of guerrilla marketing I was hoping for when we asked you to do it.

• 19:26Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 19:26Ant McPartlin?

  Weeks ago. Well done, Ian and Sasha. That's good. Very good. Final one here. Hi, I'm Deck and Hecklers Corner. Hey, we watch podcasts every week and we thought that while we're on a family holiday in Ibiza. We would print out some pictures to leave about the resort to do some advertising for you. Picture this. My son Josh, my sister Emma and my nephew Harrison. Oh.

• 19:51Declan Donnelly?

  That's brilliant.

• 19:52Ant McPartlin?

  Well done, guys. And Ibiza, Ibiza knows who we are. Let's get there.

• 19:56Declan Donnelly?

  We have reached Ibiza.

• 19:57Ant McPartlin?

  Yes. That's brilliant. Well done, guys. Very good guerrilla marketing. And a bonus side story for you. My husband and I were in the audience of the Ant and Dec show, only a few seats apart before we had even met.

• 20:12Declan Donnelly?

  No.

• 20:13Ant McPartlin?

  What? I was there with a group of my friends as our band founder was the barber on Beat the Barber. My husband Steve was there with his friend, who was the last ever contestant on Beat the Barber.

• 20:24Declan Donnelly?

  Never.

• 20:25Ant McPartlin?

  We only realised a few years after being together that we'd been there at the same time.

• 20:31Declan Donnelly?

  Isn't that amazing?

• 20:32Ant McPartlin?

  That's Jane from Brentwood, Essex. That is brilliant. Wow.

• 20:36Declan Donnelly?

  And spooky.

• 20:37Ant McPartlin?

  Very spooky.

• 20:38Declan Donnelly?

  What a small world. You never know, do you?

• 20:41Ant McPartlin?

  You don't know.

• 20:42Declan Donnelly?

  You never, ever know.

• 20:44Ant McPartlin?

  Anything.

• 20:45Declan Donnelly?

  What's gonna happen next?

• 20:46Ant McPartlin?

  You never know anything.

• 20:49Declan Donnelly?

  And that's how I like it. Oh, brilliant. Thanks for that. Thanks for all your guerrilla marketing.

• 20:54Ant McPartlin?

  Keep it up.

• 20:54Declan Donnelly?

  If you've done any others over the summer, please let us know. Beltbox at thingythingy.com.

• 21:01Declan Donnelly?

  Hanging out at beltabox.com.

• 21:03Ant McPartlin?

  It's been a minute. Please, when you do do something, nothing criminal like Deck stealing sandwiches, make sure it's all above board, but get your pictures in because we can't wait to see it. And it's not just a summer thing.

• 21:16Declan Donnelly?

  No.

• 21:17Ant McPartlin?

  This guerrilla marketing can continue.

• 21:19Declan Donnelly?

  Absolutely.

• 21:19Ant McPartlin?

  Carry it on.

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• 22:52Ant McPartlin?

  Right. Can I reveal your tattoo yet?

• 22:54Declan Donnelly?

  Not yet.

• 22:55Ant McPartlin?

  Why?

• 22:55Declan Donnelly?

  Well, we're all gonna, we're gonna wait.

• 22:56Ant McPartlin?

  Well, I'm excited. If anyone knows when you've had a tattoo, you can't wait to show it off.

• 23:00Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 23:00Ant McPartlin?

  Of course you can't.

• 23:01Declan Donnelly?

  Before we get there, though.

• 23:02Ant McPartlin?

  They're on my arm. What do you mean before we get there?

• 23:03Declan Donnelly?

  We've had lots of letters from people.

• 23:05Ant McPartlin?

  Boring.

• 23:09Ant McPartlin?

  How dull.

• 23:10Declan Donnelly?

  He doesn't mean that.

• 23:11Ant McPartlin?

  Other people? What are you on about?

• 23:13Declan Donnelly?

  Sorry, guys. He doesn't mean that.

• 23:14Ant McPartlin?

  Go on.

• 23:15Declan Donnelly?

  A lot of other people have been talking, writing to us about their tattoos.

• 23:18Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, come on. Yeah, that's good.

• 23:19Declan Donnelly?

  In the postbag. So let me just.

• 23:19Ant McPartlin?

  Good. Good. At least it's about tattoos.

• 23:22Declan Donnelly?

  It's tattoo themed.

• 23:23Ant McPartlin?

  Something I like to talk about.

• 23:24Declan Donnelly?

  So here we go.

• 23:25Ant McPartlin?

  Here's a bunch of letters from the postbag.

• 23:28Declan Donnelly?

  Do you want to go first?

• 23:28Ant McPartlin?

  I can do, yes.

• 23:29Declan Donnelly?

  Go on, then.

• 23:30Ant McPartlin?

  Uh, okay. Hi, guys.

• 23:34Declan Donnelly?

  Hey.

• 23:35Ant McPartlin?

  My name is Brooklyn. Oh, you know, Brooklyn, Brooklyn Beckham, is it?

• 23:40Declan Donnelly?

  He's got loads of tattoos.

• 23:42Ant McPartlin?

  I've just turned 18, so I got this tattoo to celebrate, but it didn't turn out so good.

• 23:47Declan Donnelly?

  Uh oh.

• 23:48Ant McPartlin?

  I'm a huge Michael Jackson fan and have been since I was a baby. So I thought a tattoo surrounding his music would be cool and meaningful to me.

• 24:05Ant McPartlin?

  It says, who's bad? I tell you what's bad, that tattoo.

• 24:10Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, my goodness.

• 24:11Ant McPartlin?

  What the hell? Oh, that's awful. That is, that is, that looks like marker pen. Safe to say I'm disappointed now I have to pay someone else to fix it. Hope this gave you a giggle. It certainly did. From Brook. Have a great day, Brook. Right back at you.

• 24:26Declan Donnelly?

  It says, who's bad?

• 24:28Ant McPartlin?

  And the who's is in black ink.

• 24:31Declan Donnelly?

  The, the B and the D from bad is in red and the A is Michael Jackson's legs.

• 24:37Ant McPartlin?

  Doing the moonwalk.

• 24:38Declan Donnelly?

  Doing the moonwalk or doing like a little tiptoe dance. So he's got his loafers on, white.

• 24:42Ant McPartlin?

  The moon.

• 24:43Declan Donnelly?

  Like white socks and black trousers.

• 24:46Ant McPartlin?

  You got, I like the fact that you can see one of her moles, which looks like Michael Jackson's got a dirty sock.

• 24:55Declan Donnelly?

  He's spilt a bit of.

• 24:57Ant McPartlin?

  Coffee on his socks.

• 24:58Declan Donnelly?

  One of his. It's a nice tattoo.

• 25:01Ant McPartlin?

  It's not. It's not. What are you talking about? It's awful.

• 25:04Declan Donnelly?

  If it was in.

• 25:04Ant McPartlin?

  It's a fail. That is a tattoo fail.

• 25:06Declan Donnelly?

  If it was in 1989.

• 25:08Ant McPartlin?

  Nah.

• 25:08Declan Donnelly?

  No?

• 25:09Ant McPartlin?

  Nah. Nah, that's bad. Who's bad? You're bad. That's bad.

• 25:14Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, that was great. Thank you.

• 25:16Ant McPartlin?

  Thanks, Brook.

• 25:17Declan Donnelly?

  Thank you, Brooklyn.

• 25:18Ant McPartlin?

  More, more, more, more.

• 25:20Declan Donnelly?

  Hi, Aunt Deck. Michelle here.

• 25:22Ant McPartlin?

  Hi, Michelle.

• 25:23Declan Donnelly?

  In 1999, when I was 17, tattoos were all about Disney characters.

• 25:29Ant McPartlin?

  Were they?

• 25:30Declan Donnelly?

  Or.

• 25:31Ant McPartlin?

  Were they though?

• 25:32Declan Donnelly?

  Or words in other languages.

• 25:34Ant McPartlin?

  Okay, I remember that trend.

• 25:36Declan Donnelly?

  I was asked by a local beauty therapist if I would like a free temporary tattoo if I'd be the model at a demo for her to advertise her business.

• 25:44Ant McPartlin?

  Right.

• 25:44Declan Donnelly?

  She explained that a temporary tattoo lasted for seven years.

• 25:53Declan Donnelly?

  As we lose a layer of skin every year and it was a new thing out.

• 25:58Ant McPartlin?

  What an, and she fell for this?

• 26:00Declan Donnelly?

  I was like, yeah, go on then. It's only on my body for seven years. So I decided on a Tigger design from Winnie the Pooh.

• 26:07Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, my God.

• 26:08Declan Donnelly?

  On my tummy.

• 26:10Ant McPartlin?

  What?

• 26:11Declan Donnelly?

  What an idiot. That's what she says, not me.

• 26:13Ant McPartlin?

  Right. Okay, good.

• 26:15Declan Donnelly?

  I am currently 44 years old and Tigger is still as orange as the day I was eight. Safe to say temporary tattoos don't exist. Epic fail and literally scarred for life. Respect, guys. Michelle. And she's given us a picture of said Tigger.

• 26:32Ant McPartlin?

  What the hell?

• 26:35Ant McPartlin?

  I mean, it's not faded, but it's definitely blurred over the last however many years. Oh, that's, you can't even tell what that is.

• 26:43Declan Donnelly?

  Can't tell it's Tigger.

• 26:44Ant McPartlin?

  I mean, she was probably lying, the tattooist, when she said it was temporary.

• 26:48Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, Michelle, I think you're gonna have to lose a few more layers of skin before you get rid of that.

• 26:51Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, you need a brittle panel on that, my love.

• 26:53Declan Donnelly?

  It's not, it's not happening. What a shame. I'm so sorry, Michelle. So sorry.

• 26:59Ant McPartlin?

  Stop it. Another one. I love these. Let's do it every week. Hi, Aunt Deck. I got married on the 15th of April, 2017. Congratulations.

• 27:07Declan Donnelly?

  Yay. Oh, it's 2017.

• 27:09Ant McPartlin?

  And decided it would be a cute idea for me and my husband to get our wedding day tattooed on our ring fingers. I've just had that done.

• 27:16Declan Donnelly?

  Have you?

• 27:16Ant McPartlin?

  I've just had my wife's initial tattooed on my wedding finger and she had the same. Nice, huh?

• 27:23Declan Donnelly?

  She had her initial on her wedding finger.

• 27:25Ant McPartlin?

  We've both got the same initial.

• 27:26Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, yeah, that's true.

• 27:27Ant McPartlin?

  Luckily. He also got it done and it looked great. I, on the other hand, didn't have the same success. I even said to the tattoo artist, it saw on the zero and still never noticed it was the wrong year.

• 27:43Declan Donnelly?

  What?

• 27:44Ant McPartlin?

  Oh. Oh, no. 2007 instead of 2017.

• 27:50Declan Donnelly?

  Oh.

• 27:50Ant McPartlin?

  No way. 10 years earlier. So now I rock around with a random date on my finger that means absolutely nothing to nobody. From Julie Murphy. Oh, my God, that's terrible. So they didn't, they obviously didn't have the same tattooist.

• 28:09Declan Donnelly?

  They, surely they did.

• 28:10Ant McPartlin?

  Well, how come his was the same?

• 28:12Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, yeah, I don't know.

• 28:13Ant McPartlin?

  There's so many questions, Julie, I need to ask. I want to get you on the phone. Can somebody tie anything to this date?

• 28:20Declan Donnelly?

  If anybody out there knows of anything noteworthy that happened on the 15th of April, 2007, let us know and we'll let.

• 28:26Ant McPartlin?

  We'll let Julie Murphy know.

• 28:28Declan Donnelly?

  Let Julie know. And then at least it'll have some significance.

• 28:30Ant McPartlin?

  I just don't get it. I don't get how the, the tattooists would do two different dates.

• 28:35Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 28:35Ant McPartlin?

  So they must have got them done at separate tattoo studios, parlors.

• 28:39Declan Donnelly?

  Hi, Aunt Deck and Hecklers.

• 28:41Ant McPartlin?

  Hi.

• 28:42Declan Donnelly?

  Fellow Geordie here. Back in 2004, I went and get two tattoos. The first one, perfect. No problems at all.

• 28:50Ant McPartlin?

  Great.

• 28:51Declan Donnelly?

  Then came the second one. I wanted four letters on the back of my arm. L, O, M, L.

• 29:01Ant McPartlin?

  L O M N. L or M what?

• 29:03Declan Donnelly?

  L.

• 29:04Ant McPartlin?

  L or M L.

• 29:05Declan Donnelly?

  Anybody know what that stands for? Love of my life. Love of my life.

• 29:08Ant McPartlin?

  I didn't know that.

• 29:09Declan Donnelly?

  How could that possibly go wrong?

• 29:14Declan Donnelly?

  The artist sketched it on me. I had, I checked it in the mirror.

• 29:18Declan Donnelly?

  Dangerous.

• 29:19Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, it's dangerous.

• 29:20Declan Donnelly?

  Because it was four letters, I didn't check the spelling. I just checked the size in and where it was placed. Gave him the okay and he got started. When he finished, he took a photo and said he'd send it to me. So I paid and left. I was sat in Burger King with my friend when the photo arrived and there it was, the wrong way round. He'd put L, L O L M.

• 29:44Ant McPartlin?

  Lol.

• 29:44Declan Donnelly?

  L O L M.

• 29:46Ant McPartlin?

  Lol. Lol.

• 29:51Declan Donnelly?

  How did I miss it? When people ask what it means, I have to try and create a different meaning to the original one. So the moral of the story is always check your tattoo, even if it's only letters or a picture. Thanks, guys. Amy Nugent.

• 30:02Ant McPartlin?

  Doll.

• 30:03Declan Donnelly?

  Thanks, Amy.

• 30:04Ant McPartlin?

  Thanks, Amy.

• 30:04Declan Donnelly?

  What could L O L M stand for? Lots of love, mother.

• 30:11Ant McPartlin?

  That's it, yeah. That's it.

• 30:16Ant McPartlin?

  Right, thank you for those tattoo fails. We should do more of them. If you've got any more tattoo fails, please send them in, because they really do make me laugh.

• 30:24Ant McPartlin?

  Is it time to reveal the tat? Well, I think we should get that tombola out. Oh, for God's sake.

• 30:32Declan Donnelly?

  Shall we just do a quick tattoo tombola first?

• 30:34Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 30:34Declan Donnelly?

  Let's do a tattoo tombola.

• 30:35Ant McPartlin?

  Why? Why? Mum's been waiting for this. What are you getting the tombola machine off for?

• 30:42Declan Donnelly?

  We're going to have a quick round.

• 30:42Ant McPartlin?

  Jesus Christ, get to what people want to see.

• 30:45Declan Donnelly?

  Of tattoo tombola.

• 30:46Ant McPartlin?

  We've got to show VT. There's a VT of the tattoo happening, which we're going to show in a minute. Don't you this rattling away in your ear holes?

• 30:53Declan Donnelly?

  This is like, um.

• 30:55Ant McPartlin?

  Torture.

• 30:56Declan Donnelly?

  The FA Cup in the eighties. You know, the build up.

• 30:59Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. Like a seven hour build up.

• 31:02Declan Donnelly?

  Right. Tattoo number sixty-two.

• 31:06Ant McPartlin?

  Number sixty-two. What is this? And? What? What's your first ever tattoo? Oh, God, it's like questions, like proper questions.

• 31:14Declan Donnelly?

  Tattoo tombola. TT.

• 31:16Ant McPartlin?

  My first ever tattoo was this one on my wrist, uh, which was S, uh, which is S and H, which means sober and healthy, because I was sober and healthy. And, uh, yeah, I quite liked the fun of that. So that was the first one. Then I got hooked. Hooked on tattoos.

• 31:35Declan Donnelly?

  What was it that kind of flicked the switch for you? Because you were quite against tattoos in your mid twenties?

• 31:43Ant McPartlin?

  Yes, from which you've seen.

• 31:45Declan Donnelly?

  Which you've seen, we did a, uh, episode of Late Lunch, which I think we saw a few weeks ago on the pod. And your sister got one and you were very happy about it on Late Lunch.

• 31:53Ant McPartlin?

  You know, she had Casper the ghost and, uh, that hasn't aged well. She won't mind me saying that on here. I'll get a picture of it. It's a bit like Tigger. It's red. Well, I don't know. Maybe I just saw more people. It was more socially acceptable for people to have tattoos. Um, and everyone suddenly started getting them. And I was just like, I'd like something to mark my sobriety date.

• 32:17Declan Donnelly?

  Mm-hmm.

• 32:17Ant McPartlin?

  Uh, but I don't want to put the date on there, because you never know.

• 32:20Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 32:21Ant McPartlin?

  Tempting fate, you know? Um, thankfully, it was all good and I got S and H on my wrist and I really enjoyed it. And it wasn't that painful.

• 32:30Declan Donnelly?

  Another little TT. Oh, here we go. Number fourteen.

• 32:35Ant McPartlin?

  Number fourteen. Is play the VT. Deck, could you chat us through, you're, um, you're a qualified tattoo artist, aren't you?

• 32:43Declan Donnelly?

  I am now, yeah.

• 32:44Ant McPartlin?

  No, he's not. No, he's not. Some of your training and like how you got into it. He's not.

• 32:48Declan Donnelly?

  I qualified very, very recently.

• 32:51Ant McPartlin?

  Last night.

• 32:52Declan Donnelly?

  As last night. Um, but I have had a full training session. Um, I trained on a banana.

• 32:59Ant McPartlin?

  Of all things.

• 33:01Declan Donnelly?

  I got a banana and started tattooing it. So that's some of my early training work. This will probably go.

• 33:08Ant McPartlin?

  So what are you, hold on, just explain what you've done. You've done your, you've done a D?

• 33:11Declan Donnelly?

  I've done a D.

• 33:12Ant McPartlin?

  Well, you started off with a square.

• 33:14Declan Donnelly?

  I started off with a square.

• 33:15Ant McPartlin?

  That's deep. Look how deep the square is. Look how much you've dug into the skin. Poor banana.

• 33:21Declan Donnelly?

  Um, so I did a square to start with and I did a star. And then I just did a lot of Ds. A lot of Ds. Formed a lot of Ds. D, D, D, D, D, D, D.

• 33:36Ant McPartlin?

  A do da da.

• 33:39Declan Donnelly?

  So I did a lot of my own initial. That was my initial training. And, uh.

• 33:46Ant McPartlin?

  Well, you see in a minute, he rocked up at mine, practised on a banana and then tattooed me. So.

• 33:53Declan Donnelly?

  And the result is incredible.

• 33:55Ant McPartlin?

  It's not.

• 33:56Declan Donnelly?

  Well, let's just have one more question in the tombola.

• 34:00Ant McPartlin?

  We don't need one more question. We don't need one more question. Let's just get to the VT. Stop with your.

• 34:08Ant McPartlin?

  Right, let's just show the VT. It's been over six months since I agreed to do this.

• 34:14Declan Donnelly?

  To mark six months of the podcast.

• 34:15Ant McPartlin?

  To mark six months of the pod. We've been on longer than that, but, uh, here it is. It was designed by Holly Love. So thank you, Holly. You inspired the original design.

• 34:24Declan Donnelly?

  Thank you to everybody who sent in designs.

• 34:26Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, we did have very good designs.

• 34:28Declan Donnelly?

  Especially the golfer on the belly button, which I really fought for until the last minute, didn't quite make it there.

• 34:33Ant McPartlin?

  Unfortunately, it didn't win.

• 34:33Declan Donnelly?

  But thanks for all of your designs.

• 34:35Ant McPartlin?

  We'll find out what the winning design was in a minute, but first, here it is, being inked on my skin with a surprise visitor.

• 34:45Ant McPartlin?

  So today is tea day, tattoo day. The guys are setting up over there. Have a look. I've set the lighting. The mood is nice. I feel very calm, very zen. I haven't told Deck because I don't want him getting in the way and just like fussing around because he's a warrior and he doesn't like needles. And he probably faints. So it's just me, the guys, tattoo, donuts. It's all cool. Lola, Lola, I'm very excited. Come on. Would you like a cream bun? Would you like a donut? Would you like a donut?

• 35:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 35:21Ant McPartlin?

  There you go.

• 35:22Speaker 03

  Thanks so much.

• 35:23Ant McPartlin?

  No problem.

• 35:24Declan Donnelly?

  So it's tea day and it's happening and I am being invited. But guess what? I've come along anyway because I've been in touch with the artist. So I knew it was happening tonight. So I'm just going to pay a little visit.

• 35:40Ant McPartlin?

  Okay, here we go. Holly, this is your design. This is your fault. Hope you're proud. Let's go. I won't move. You talk when you tattoo or is it off putting?

• 35:54Speaker 03

  Uh, yeah, but not, uh, too much.

• 35:56Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, of course, I'll be quiet. I'm one of like. I can, I'm one of like chat as, don't feel like you've got to answer back. Ah, the summer's nearly over though. Isn't it? The nights are closing in and the leaves are coming off the trees.

• 36:14Ant McPartlin?

  Don't make me laugh, Lola. Don't you laugh? Stop it. Jeez, what the heck? So the anomaly of what's going on is just finally dawned on me now. The fact that we started this as a joke that to celebrate six months of the pod, I was going to get a tattoo. A tattoo that will last forever. Oh God, it looks good. Is Deck going to have to do something? Yeah, Deck is going to have to do something. If I'm doing this, this, which will be on my body for the rest of my life, what's he going to do? Huh? Read a diary? I mean, oh, what? But you can't feel that needle, can you, really?

• 36:53Declan Donnelly?

  What's going on here then? Tea day, is it, without me?

• 36:56Ant McPartlin?

  What are you? What the hell are you doing here?

• 36:58Declan Donnelly?

  Tea day without me?

• 36:59Ant McPartlin?

  Yes, without you. You're not getting a tattoo.

• 37:01Declan Donnelly?

  Look at that.

• 37:02Ant McPartlin?

  What are you, how did you get in? How did you get in?

• 37:05Declan Donnelly?

  You've left the back door open.

• 37:06Ant McPartlin?

  Shut up. Did you come all the way here just to watch this?

• 37:09Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 37:09Ant McPartlin?

  Well, that's very kind of you. Good, now chill. It's zen, okay? It's nice, isn't it?

• 37:15Declan Donnelly?

  It doesn't hurt.

• 37:16Ant McPartlin?

  No, it doesn't hurt actually. She's very gentle. She's, she's excellent at what she does.

• 37:21Declan Donnelly?

  I wanted to be here to see it.

• 37:22Ant McPartlin?

  Do you like it?

• 37:23Declan Donnelly?

  I love it.

• 37:24Ant McPartlin?

  Good.

• 37:25Declan Donnelly?

  And also to see if I could maybe have a little go.

• 37:28Ant McPartlin?

  What do you mean? Are you going to get one?

• 37:30Declan Donnelly?

  No, I've had a little go on you.

• 37:33Ant McPartlin?

  Have a tattoo? Shut up.

• 37:34Declan Donnelly?

  Can I do a bit?

• 37:35Ant McPartlin?

  What are you on about, can you do a bit?

• 37:36Declan Donnelly?

  Can I, is it?

• 37:37Ant McPartlin?

  He can't do a bit, can he? What do you mean, yes?

• 37:39Declan Donnelly?

  I can. She said yes.

• 37:40Ant McPartlin?

  What do you mean, yes, this is my own?

• 37:42Declan Donnelly?

  I was going to say yes. I expected it to be.

• 37:45Ant McPartlin?

  You're going to tattoo me? A little bit.

• 37:48Declan Donnelly?

  Can I do a little bit?

• 37:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:50Ant McPartlin?

  No, what are you asking her? It's my body. She'd say to me, can I do a little bit?

• 37:54Declan Donnelly?

  Can I do a little bit?

• 37:55Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, go on then.

• 37:55Declan Donnelly?

  Can I?

• 37:56Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. Johnnem.

• 37:58Declan Donnelly?

  Oh.

• 37:59Ant McPartlin?

  Right, concentrate.

• 38:00Declan Donnelly?

  I'll go and wash my hands. Do I have to put scrubs on and stuff?

• 38:03Ant McPartlin?

  Yes, be clean.

• 38:04Declan Donnelly?

  I'll go and wash my hands.

• 38:05Ant McPartlin?

  You dirty boy.

• 38:08Ant McPartlin?

  And how do you feel that Deck's going to be tattooing? Well, first of all, you're in cahoots. You've all been in touch with him, which I'm not happy about, because this was my day. Tea day was Aunt's day, not Deck's day. Now he's getting involved.

• 38:23Declan Donnelly?

  The, from before.

• 38:25Ant McPartlin?

  He's got gloves on.

• 38:25Declan Donnelly?

  You once.

• 38:26Ant McPartlin?

  He's got gloves on. And you're dressed in black. There's something really weird about, something quite sinister about this. What the hell? This, what am I doing? See what I mean? You can't even sit on the, you can't even sit on the seat. You want to tattoo me on?

• 38:41Declan Donnelly?

  Now, will I need my glasses or I just give it?

• 38:43Ant McPartlin?

  No, you need your glasses and get that on. He's even struggling with a glove.

• 38:48Ant McPartlin?

  What am I doing, man? You do look like a sinister surgeon.

• 38:54Declan Donnelly?

  What, how do these work?

• 38:59Ant McPartlin?

  Have you practised?

• 39:00Declan Donnelly?

  I, I, I have a.

• 39:03Declan Donnelly?

  I have a little go.

• 39:05Ant McPartlin?

  On who?

• 39:06Declan Donnelly?

  A banana.

• 39:06Ant McPartlin?

  A banana?

• 39:07Declan Donnelly?

  I practised on a banana. I have had a go on a banana, so I'm fully qualified now.

• 39:16Declan Donnelly?

  I've been in contact with the artist. I've been talked through it. I know what I'm doing.

• 39:21Ant McPartlin?

  Why do you want to do it?

• 39:23Declan Donnelly?

  Um.

• 39:23Ant McPartlin?

  Just to be involved?

• 39:24Declan Donnelly?

  To be involved.

• 39:25Ant McPartlin?

  Did you feel left out?

• 39:25Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 39:26Ant McPartlin?

  Oh my God. Right, right, right. Concentrate.

• 39:31Declan Donnelly?

  I've concentrated.

• 39:32Ant McPartlin?

  Concentrate. This is serious. Oh my God. Is this it?

• 39:36Declan Donnelly?

  Right. Just stretch it.

• 39:38Ant McPartlin?

  Stretch what? My arm?

• 39:41Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 39:41Ant McPartlin?

  No, no, no, no.

• 39:43Declan Donnelly?

  Tell me if this hurts.

• 39:44Ant McPartlin?

  Okay. Ah!

• 39:52Ant McPartlin?

  Are you done? Are you done?

• 39:53Declan Donnelly?

  Nearly.

• 39:54Ant McPartlin?

  There's a lot of tongue action that you see at the corner of your eye. You're not going to lick it, are you? Because that's unhygienic.

• 40:04Declan Donnelly?

  There we go.

• 40:04Ant McPartlin?

  There we go. Wow.

• 40:07Declan Donnelly?

  There I was. There was a lot of tongue action, wasn't there?

• 40:09Ant McPartlin?

  There were a lot of tongue action.

• 40:10Declan Donnelly?

  More than I realised.

• 40:11Ant McPartlin?

  That was really off putting.

• 40:12Declan Donnelly?

  That was more than I realised. It's probably a good time now to confess that I was wearing my wrong glasses.

• 40:17Ant McPartlin?

  What?

• 40:18Declan Donnelly?

  Um, I didn't have the right glasses yesterday. I should have had.

• 40:19Ant McPartlin?

  What do you mean?

• 40:20Declan Donnelly?

  I should have had me reading glasses so I can see properly.

• 40:22Ant McPartlin?

  Well, what are they?

• 40:22Declan Donnelly?

  They're just, they're, they're, they're these, which show me very focal, which means I can.

• 40:27Ant McPartlin?

  Jesus, really?

• 40:28Declan Donnelly?

  I brought the wrong glasses.

• 40:29Ant McPartlin?

  No wonder.

• 40:29Declan Donnelly?

  So I couldn't see brilliantly.

• 40:31Ant McPartlin?

  Well, you've left your mark. You've left your mark on me.

• 40:34Declan Donnelly?

  I certainly did leave my mark.

• 40:36Ant McPartlin?

  Forever.

• 40:37Declan Donnelly?

  Forever. Can we have a look at it?

• 40:38Ant McPartlin?

  Unless it's one of those temporary ones that only lasts seven years.

• 40:40Declan Donnelly?

  Seven years.

• 40:41Ant McPartlin?

  Uh, so here, you've seen the process. It's been a long time building up to it.

• 40:46Declan Donnelly?

  Take it off. Take it off.

• 40:48Ant McPartlin?

  Take it off. Take it off. All right, here we go. So, okay, ready?

• 40:53Declan Donnelly?

  Ready.

• 40:54Ant McPartlin?

  Ready. There you go. There we go. Here we go. There it is. That's it there. I love it. Angel of the North in the star with Little D's Little D.

• 41:07Declan Donnelly?

  Got my Little D in there.

• 41:08Ant McPartlin?

  Your bit's the most painful, by the way.

• 41:10Declan Donnelly?

  Was it?

• 41:10Ant McPartlin?

  Your bit's the most painful.

• 41:11Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 41:12Ant McPartlin?

  Really dog dick.

• 41:13Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 41:13Ant McPartlin?

  It's nice, isn't it?

• 41:14Declan Donnelly?

  It's really nice. I love it.

• 41:16Ant McPartlin?

  There's your Little D.

• 41:17Declan Donnelly?

  Yay.

• 41:18Ant McPartlin?

  Little D. Did a Little D on me arm. Uh, yeah, have a little closer over there. Let's get a good shot of it. Looks good though, right? Very good. Thank you, Holly Love, for your original design.

• 41:28Declan Donnelly?

  Brilliant design.

• 41:30Ant McPartlin?

  It's a, it's a very nice tattoo. The Angel of the North in a star with.

• 41:35Declan Donnelly?

  Little D.

• 41:35Ant McPartlin?

  Little D's Little D in the corner. There you are. That's mad.

• 41:40Declan Donnelly?

  It is mad.

• 41:41Ant McPartlin?

  That's, that's gonna be there forever now. All because of you guys.

• 41:46Ant McPartlin?

  So I've learned a big lesson here. If you say it on the pod, you've got to do it.

• 41:51Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 41:51Ant McPartlin?

  So be careful what you say on the pod.

• 41:53Declan Donnelly?

  I think to mark a year with pod.

• 41:55Ant McPartlin?

  I'm gonna jump out of a plane.

• 41:58Ant McPartlin?

  I'm careful what I say.

• 42:00Declan Donnelly?

  I'm going to have a lovely facial.

• 42:04Ant McPartlin?

  No, what are you gonna do? We do need some suggestions of what Dec can do when we celebrate a year.

• 42:10Declan Donnelly?

  We don't really.

• 42:11Ant McPartlin?

  Um, we did talk about piercing, didn't we?

• 42:14Declan Donnelly?

  You did.

• 42:15Ant McPartlin?

  You were keen on.

• 42:16Declan Donnelly?

  No, I was not.

• 42:16Ant McPartlin?

  You were keen on?

• 42:17Declan Donnelly?

  No, thank you.

• 42:18Ant McPartlin?

  You, you, yeah, no, you weren't.

• 42:20Declan Donnelly?

  No.

• 42:20Ant McPartlin?

  Sorry. It's the how I, it's the how I recollected it. I thought you said yes. I thought you said A O K. If it was, was the exact words you said.

• 42:28Declan Donnelly?

  Sounds like me.

• 42:28Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 42:29Declan Donnelly?

  Sounds like something I'd say.

• 42:30Ant McPartlin?

  A, oh, you said A O K. Why, you said Y I, man. I will, I will have a piercing.

• 42:37Declan Donnelly?

  We'll come back to that in a year's time.

• 42:38Ant McPartlin?

  In my genitalia. Uh, so any other suggestions though, please send them in. But uh, thanks for that. That was fun.

• 42:45Declan Donnelly?

  It was brilliant.

• 42:46Ant McPartlin?

  That was fun. And I, I really like it.

• 42:48Declan Donnelly?

  That's great.

• 42:49Ant McPartlin?

  I really like it. It's nice. It's nicely balanced in my arms.

• 42:51Declan Donnelly?

  And, and it's a lovely, lovely reminder of.

• 42:53Ant McPartlin?

  A nice little nod to the North East, to Newcastle. Um, got the Angel of the North there. It's lovely.

• 43:00Declan Donnelly?

  And we'll always have it there. It's been designed and it was made by the viewers and listeners of the podcast.

• 43:05Ant McPartlin?

  Thank you.

• 43:06Declan Donnelly?

  So thanks for that.

• 43:07Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 43:09Ant McPartlin?

  This next section is sponsored by Gemini, Google's AI app.

• 43:14Declan Donnelly?

  So September is now upon us.

• 43:16Ant McPartlin?

  Yes, it is.

• 43:17Declan Donnelly?

  The days are getting cooler. The nights are drawing in. Christmas is ahead.

• 43:24Ant McPartlin?

  I'm now going to enter my batch cooking era.

• 43:28Declan Donnelly?

  Your, your batch cooking era?

• 43:29Ant McPartlin?

  Well, I thought I batch cooked. Busy, innit? September, all the way through to Christmas is very busy.

• 43:34Declan Donnelly?

  It is for us, yeah.

• 43:35Ant McPartlin?

  Busy time of work. So I thought, you know what batch cooking is, do you?

• 43:38Declan Donnelly?

  Kind of.

• 43:39Ant McPartlin?

  You just, like, say on a Sunday night, for example, you batch cook big meals and then you can freeze them and then you can go back to them throughout.

• 43:47Declan Donnelly?

  So you just portion it up to get in the freezer?

• 43:48Ant McPartlin?

  Exactly.

• 43:49Declan Donnelly?

  Good idea.

• 43:49Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 43:50Declan Donnelly?

  What do you, what is, what is your, uh, batch cooking specialities?

• 43:52Ant McPartlin?

  Well, I don't know how I'm doing it yet. I was hoping, I was hoping that Gemini, well, I could batch cook.

• 43:57Declan Donnelly?

  Good idea.

• 43:58Ant McPartlin?

  Should we do that?

• 43:58Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 43:58Ant McPartlin?

  Okay.

• 43:59Declan Donnelly?

  It's a good way, this as well, of staying healthy through the autumn and the.

• 44:02Ant McPartlin?

  Well, you talked about healthy.

• 44:04Declan Donnelly?

  And the road to Christmas. Well, you need to make sure you're eating right, you know.

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• 45:37Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, it's also.

• 45:38Ant McPartlin?

  Okay, ma'am.

• 45:41Declan Donnelly?

  But it's also a time in the autumn, I think, where you, you get into shape a little bit before the excesses of the festive period. So you've got to hit the gym a bit in the autumn. So you're gonna make sure you get your macros.

• 45:52Ant McPartlin?

  Build me a plan to batch cook a few different autumn dinners.

• 45:58Declan Donnelly?

  High protein.

• 45:59Ant McPartlin?

  In under three hours. Use ingredients that will freeze and reheat and can be used across all dishes.

• 46:09Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, and I like a bit of spice, so make sure to include that in your thinking. Can I do that? I'm gonna ask that Gemini.

• 46:17Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, I mean, you've put quite a lot on Gemini there.

• 46:19Ant McPartlin?

  It's thinking, it's thinking, it's thinking, it's thinking.

• 46:20Declan Donnelly?

  It's gonna be thinking a while, I mean.

• 46:21Ant McPartlin?

  Gemini says, quicker than you thought, right? Batch cooking three bold, hearty autumn meals inside two and a half hours relies on shared prep and overlapping aromatics. This plan centres on sweet potato, black beans, kale, sausage, and chipotle pepper. Ingredients that retain their structure when defrosted, uh, without turning mushy. Yes, yes, absolutely, absolutely without turning mushy.

• 46:49Declan Donnelly?

  That's what we got.

• 46:49Ant McPartlin?

  All right, hold on.

• 46:50Declan Donnelly?

  Come on, I'm hungry.

• 46:52Ant McPartlin?

  Uh, the menu. Ooh, three good dishes here. Smokey Chipotle and Sweet Potato Chili.

• 46:59Declan Donnelly?

  That sounds good.

• 47:00Ant McPartlin?

  You fancy that? Wanna come round for that?

• 47:01Declan Donnelly?

  Anything smoky, I'm, I'm there.

• 47:03Ant McPartlin?

  Spicy sausage, kale, and butternut squash stew.

• 47:07Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 47:08Ant McPartlin?

  Yes.

• 47:08Declan Donnelly?

  Love a spicy sausage.

• 47:09Ant McPartlin?

  And, and finally fiery roasted sweet potato and black bean enchilada bake.

• 47:15Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, yeah.

• 47:16Ant McPartlin?

  They're not bad, are they?

• 47:17Declan Donnelly?

  They sound great.

• 47:18Ant McPartlin?

  Look, it gives us a shopping list to buy all of the canned stuff, all of the produce, all of the proteins, all of the dairy. That's good.

• 47:26Declan Donnelly?

  Talking of protein, can you make sure, can you make sure you're putting enough protein in there for me?

• 47:30Ant McPartlin?

  Hold on, let me ask. Gemini, can you list out the protein amounts per serving?

• 47:35Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 47:35Ant McPartlin?

  For each of the meals you've suggested? Is that the kind of thing you want?

• 47:38Declan Donnelly?

  Yes, I need to get a minimum amount of protein per day.

• 47:40Ant McPartlin?

  Cause I'm a protein bro.

• 47:42Declan Donnelly?

  Maintain my muscle mass.

• 47:43Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, look, so look, across the three dishes, it's given me all of the protein. Like, for the first one, it's 32 to 36 grams of protein per serving. The next one, 24 to 28 grams of protein. And the last one is 16 to 20 grams of protein per serving.

• 47:58Declan Donnelly?

  I need more protein than that. Can you ask if there's ways to boost your protein, please?

• 48:02Ant McPartlin?

  Are you joking?

• 48:02Declan Donnelly?

  No, I'm not joking. I'm deadly serious. Look at me face.

• 48:07Ant McPartlin?

  Gemini, do you have tips on boosting the protein?

• 48:11Declan Donnelly?

  Need more protein.

• 48:12Ant McPartlin?

  Please. Yes, it does. Swap Greek yogurt eh, for sour cream on the chili.

• 48:19Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 48:20Ant McPartlin?

  Uh, that's an extra five grams of protein per serving. Stir in an extra tin of cannellini or butter beans.

• 48:28Declan Donnelly?

  Right.

• 48:29Ant McPartlin?

  Is that how you say it? Cannellini? Uh, in the stew, that's an extra six grams of protein. Scatter hemp seeds or pumpkin seeds over the enchilada bake before reheating.

• 48:40Declan Donnelly?

  That gives more protein.

• 48:41Ant McPartlin?

  Well, it must do. So we asked for.

• 48:43Declan Donnelly?

  That is amazing.

• 48:44Ant McPartlin?

  It's good, isn't it?

• 48:44Declan Donnelly?

  It's really good.

• 48:46Ant McPartlin?

  Watch this though. Gemini, can you save these recipes and ingredients and protein stuff into a Google Doc for later? Here we go. Gemini says, I've created a new Google Doc with your batch cooking plan, complete with step-by-step instructions and protein breakdowns.

• 49:06Declan Donnelly?

  That is right up my street.

• 49:08Ant McPartlin?

  Read that on my pink phone.

• 49:10Declan Donnelly?

  There you go. So when are you, um, getting in the kitchen to make this for us both?

• 49:14Ant McPartlin?

  No, that's for me. You make your own. Batch cook yourself. So download the Gemini app today to unlock the power of Google AI on your phone. Check responses. Seller required. Compatibility and availability varies. 18 plus.

• 49:30Ant McPartlin?

  So that's it. That's all we've got time for.

• 49:32Declan Donnelly?

  Sure is. That's tea day, folks. Uh, we're back on Monday with a, a bonus. And then next Thursday, we are back with you. It's a very busy time of year for us. Um, and we are going away. While we're away, we're gonna have a lot of time in cars and stuff. So if you've got any more car games for us to play.

• 49:49Ant McPartlin?

  No need, no, no.

• 49:50Declan Donnelly?

  We love doing that over the summer.

• 49:52Ant McPartlin?

  No, we don't.

• 49:52Declan Donnelly?

  The pair of us.

• 49:53Ant McPartlin?

  We don't.

• 49:53Declan Donnelly?

  The two of us love that.

• 49:54Ant McPartlin?

  We've both got iPads and iPhones.

• 49:56Declan Donnelly?

  So any more games you've got for us that we can play on the pod?

• 49:58Ant McPartlin?

  We don't need games. We've got games on our phone.

• 50:00Declan Donnelly?

  That would be very much appreciated.

• 50:01Ant McPartlin?

  It wouldn't.

• 50:02Declan Donnelly?

  Like we say, back with a bonus Monday, then we'll see you next Thursday from Autopsy's location.

• 50:05Ant McPartlin?

  We're doing our own.

• 50:06Declan Donnelly?

  Uh, remember to follow the podcast, uh, wherever you get your podcasts and give us a like.

• 50:11Ant McPartlin?

  And subscribe and all that jazz.

• 50:13Declan Donnelly?

  On YouTube.

• 50:14Ant McPartlin?

  Go on, it really helps.

• 50:15Declan Donnelly?

  Until we see you next.

• 50:18Ant McPartlin?

  Respect, guys.

• 50:19Declan Donnelly?

  See you soon.

• 50:21Ant McPartlin?

  Come on.

• 50:24Ant McPartlin?

  Come on, you.

• 50:25Declan Donnelly?

  Can I poke it?

• 50:25Ant McPartlin?

  Huh?

• 50:26Declan Donnelly?

  Can I poke you, oh?