Ant Doesn't Understand Tech (or does he?) & Dec’s High Five Injury

On this week’s Hanging Out, Ant’s been to the future on his motorbike, Dec’s got something to swap, and one viewer sends in a VERY Cockney film script for the boys to act out. Plus, we hear from one viewer’s scandalous diary entry from 1994 and delve into all your letters in the postbag. We’ll be back on Monday, keep your emails coming! [email protected] ----- If you have something to swap for Dec's air fryer, send a picture and description of your item and why you don't want it anymore to [email protected]. We would also love to HEAR from you, so we encourage voice notes about your items as well! This is not a competition or a prize draw - we will be choosing participants at our discretion for content purposes. If selected, we will contact you to discuss the swap. ----- 00:00 - Coming up01:30 - Ant’s Got a Motorbike06:20 - Dec’s Air Fryer!09:55 - The Miniature Wife11:50 - “We’ve infiltrated fitness watches!”14:20 - Dec’s Diary18:05 - Emma’s Diary22:53 - A Very Cockney Film Script29:45 - Laura’s telly32:10 - Postbag Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Ugh, I hate Mondays.

• 0:01Speaker 01

  King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Swirl Bite?

• 0:03Speaker 00

  Uh, Taylor Hansen? Sure, I'll try one. Mmm.

• 0:09Speaker 02

  Hey, let's get back to work, please.

• 0:10Speaker 00

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• 0:15Speaker 02

  Taylor Hansen? Nice.

• 0:17Speaker 01

  Try one.

• 0:18Speaker 02

  Mmm.

• 0:22Speaker 03

  King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites. There's nothing like it.

• 0:30Speaker 04

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• 0:59Ant McPartlin?

  Coming up on the show, you make banana ratings hit the big time. So we've infiltrated...

• 1:06Declan Donnelly?

  And gets overtaken in the baby naming stakes? By my dog.

• 1:10Ant McPartlin?

  She's had four sons? And not one of them's called Anthony? How insulting is that? A fan's diary puts Dec at the centre of a shock revelation. I kissed Duncan on the lips.

• 1:25Declan Donnelly?

  We enter our hard man era in our latest film script read.

• 1:29Ant McPartlin?

  That was me! I was playing a pushchair.

• 1:32Declan Donnelly?

  Today's the day you pay for your sins, old man.

• 1:35Ant McPartlin?

  And what would you give to get your hands on Dec's air fryer? Enjoy the show!

• 1:40Declan Donnelly?

  Enjoy the show!

• 1:45Declan Donnelly?

  Hello!

• 1:46Ant McPartlin?

  Hello, everybody!

• 1:48Declan Donnelly?

  Put your lights on, Anne. Put the lights on, so I can see what I'm doing. Hello, good morning, good evening. Welcome along to the hangout for another hangout with me and him. Y'all know. Oh, that wasn't...

• 1:59Ant McPartlin?

  Are you tired?

• 2:00Declan Donnelly?

  I'm quite tired, actually.

• 2:03Ant McPartlin?

  You're literally saying that, that's why I'm so tired.

• 2:06Declan Donnelly?

  That was... I was go... That's what I was going for.

• 2:09Ant McPartlin?

  But that's how you feel inside.

• 2:10Declan Donnelly?

  I didn't have my glasses on.

• 2:11Ant McPartlin?

  Inside he feels.

• 2:12Declan Donnelly?

  Y'all know. I do feel quite tired.

• 2:14Ant McPartlin?

  What's going on, why so tired?

• 2:15Declan Donnelly?

  I just had a... had such a busy weekend. Been a very busy week.

• 2:19Ant McPartlin?

  And you went to the gym this morning?

• 2:20Declan Donnelly?

  And I went to the gym this morning.

• 2:21Ant McPartlin?

  Leg day, was it?

• 2:22Declan Donnelly?

  There was legs today.

• 2:23Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, what were you thinking?

• 2:23Declan Donnelly?

  Put me in a right bad mood. Well, I've got to get in these shorts, haven't I?

• 2:30Ant McPartlin?

  But yeah, it's nice to be back here. Is it? With you. I don't feel so tired. I was tired this morning, then, do you know how I came here today? Go on. On my motorbike.

• 2:44Ant McPartlin?

  Tell me more. So it was the first trip on my new electric. It's called a Maving. Yee-haw. Yee-haw. And it is fully electric. I think it's a British brand actually, so it's brand new. Very sexy. It's outside. I'll go and show you later. Great. After this, I'll take you out there. You can't ride it because you're not insured, but you can look at it. You can sit on it for a photo. Can I sit on it? Yeah. I'll take a photo and send it to your wife. Say it looks sexy and nice. It's taking sexy and nice on a bike.

• 3:17Declan Donnelly?

  Ooh, you're doing something sexy and nice.

• 3:20Ant McPartlin?

  You've really got into the eye pads today, haven't you? So I came from mine and worried a little bit because of the charge. Still not quite sure how far you get. Did you leave on a hundred percent? I left on a hundred percent and to get to the podcast studio, I'm down to sixty-two percent. So I should get back. You'll be fine. Well, who wants to risk that though? I might need to, well, I need to give a little extra charge. No, you'll be fine. I'm not going to risk that on the first. No, no. Go on. But I can tell you though, I get it now. I get, I get motorbikes. Do you know what I mean? I get the thrill of them. It's a thrill, but also it's just joyous. Is it? Yeah, I just had a smile on my face. It was cold and a lot windier than I thought when I first left the house. It was chilly this morning.

• 4:03Ant McPartlin?

  When I was coming down the A roads. I was, oh my God. But it was, yeah, it was joyous. Absolutely joyous. I loved every mile. Oh. Look at the great mood I'm in today. I will not be angry on today's podcast. I will be smiling over. Don't make me angry, Lola. I'm not in one of those angry moods today. I'm in a joyous mood. I've played music as I came in and everything. Do you mind, ma? She's the one. She puts the letters in there to wind me up.

• 4:28Declan Donnelly?

  I know. So when you say you get it, are you now like?

• 4:32Ant McPartlin?

  Mortback head, peril head.

• 4:33Declan Donnelly?

  Getting leather trousers?

• 4:35Ant McPartlin?

  No, not leather, no.

• 4:36Declan Donnelly?

  Biker jacket, I've got a biker jacket.

• 4:38Ant McPartlin?

  Biker robe jacket.

• 4:39Declan Donnelly?

  I've got, no, I've got a leather jacket I wore for me, for me headshots, if you wanna borrow that.

• 4:44Ant McPartlin?

  All right, I don't think it would fit though. Yeah, I would have as well because it was so cool.

• 4:48Declan Donnelly?

  It was a biker jacket.

• 4:49Ant McPartlin?

  It was really cool. No, I haven't got leathers. I've got like a nice.

• 4:52Declan Donnelly?

  Are you gonna get leathers?

• 4:53Ant McPartlin?

  I don't think I wanna get leathers.

• 4:54Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, get leathers.

• 4:55Ant McPartlin?

  Why? Do you wanna see me in leathers?

• 4:56Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 4:56Ant McPartlin?

  Why? Because you think I would look?

• 4:58Speaker 07

  Sexy and nice.

• 4:59Ant McPartlin?

  Sexy and nice. Maybe I would. Uh, yeah, no, I've got, I've got a cool helmet and a nice jacket, like a bellstaff jacket. Quite cool.

• 5:08Declan Donnelly?

  You're a cool biker.

• 5:09Ant McPartlin?

  I'm a cool biker. I'm a cool rider.

• 5:12Speaker 07

  Do you listen to music?

• 5:14Ant McPartlin?

  Do I listen to music? Yeah, it's a Bluetooth, it's a Bluetooth helmet. So you can listen to music. It was my first ride today though, so I didn't wanna, I didn't wanna listen to music because I've had a lot to concentrate on. Although I do have, you know, when someone rings your doorbell at home, it's connected to my phone and I forgot to turn off the notifications. So I just kept going dong, dong, dong. So that's, that's quite off putting, if I'm honest. I'll have to turn that notification off. I, um, I'll have to get the kids to do that because they can never work out. Can one of you work out my notifications, please? You get to that age, you'll get to that age with, with your two where you just, do you know what it is? It's just easy.

• 5:55Ant McPartlin?

  Like sometimes it's, it's easy to pretend that you don't know how your phone works. So then they just do it. So you just go, oh God, how do you turn off these notifications? And I kinda know, but it'll just take a little bit of thinking time. Don't have that time at the minute, we're so busy.

• 6:09Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 6:09Ant McPartlin?

  So I'm like, I don't know how you do this. So they go, give it a year, I'll do it for you. Brilliant.

• 6:14Declan Donnelly?

  That's quite good.

• 6:15Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. Anything like kind of techie. I just pretend I don't know what I'm doing and then the kids do it. Cool, eh?

• 6:21Declan Donnelly?

  Mine are a bit little for that.

• 6:22Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, they are. They are. But they'll, they'll, they'll get there.

• 6:24Declan Donnelly?

  They will get there before you know it.

• 6:26Ant McPartlin?

  Flying cars. Be the worker flying cars.

• 6:29Declan Donnelly?

  That I get.

• 6:30Ant McPartlin?

  Would you, would you fly a car?

• 6:32Declan Donnelly?

  I mean, as long as they're safe.

• 6:33Ant McPartlin?

  I'm a time traveller and I've been in the future.

• 6:35Declan Donnelly?

  That's right.

• 6:36Ant McPartlin?

  As you know, so they're very safe, safer than normal cars.

• 6:40Declan Donnelly?

  Where have you, where have you been? Have you been anywhere interested in the last week?

• 6:43Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, yeah, I have.

• 6:45Declan Donnelly?

  Into the future or into the past?

• 6:46Ant McPartlin?

  Uh, into the future.

• 6:48Declan Donnelly?

  How far?

• 6:49Ant McPartlin?

  Two thousand and thirty. Not that far, but far enough, far enough to know.

• 6:55Declan Donnelly?

  He's only, he's not gone far because he does not, not sure how long his charge is gonna last. Got a new time traveller bike.

• 7:03Declan Donnelly?

  That's why your bike's only on sixty-two percent, you've been in twenty thirty.

• 7:06Ant McPartlin?

  How have you been? Anyway, apart from leg day?

• 7:08Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, good, busy. And, and also we're getting to that time of year again where, I did this in January.

• 7:14Ant McPartlin?

  Did what? Leg day?

• 7:15Declan Donnelly?

  No, no. Did this in January and now I, I feel like it, it comes around again in April. The current Mrs. Donnelly has another clear out.

• 7:23Ant McPartlin?

  Ah.

• 7:24Declan Donnelly?

  So we have one in the beginning of January for the new year.

• 7:26Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 7:27Declan Donnelly?

  And then we have to have a spring clear out.

• 7:29Ant McPartlin?

  Easter spring clear out.

• 7:30Declan Donnelly?

  So the last time, the last time I went to the, um, to the storage unit that we've got, I found me diary.

• 7:36Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 7:36Declan Donnelly?

  Which we've been reading on the podcast. This time.

• 7:39Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, what did you find this time?

• 7:40Declan Donnelly?

  I found.

• 7:41Ant McPartlin?

  Memorabilia?

• 7:42Declan Donnelly?

  No. I found an air fryer.

• 7:45Ant McPartlin?

  Why? Why have you got an air fryer in storage?

• 7:47Declan Donnelly?

  Because I've got an air fryer at home.

• 7:49Ant McPartlin?

  Why have you got two air fryers?

• 7:50Declan Donnelly?

  I don't know. I didn't realise I had two air fryers. I've got an air fryer in storage, a backup air fryer. In case my first.

• 7:57Ant McPartlin?

  He just loves air fryers. Well, if you ever watched Taste Mates on Beltar Box, you realise how much Deck adores the air fryer.

• 8:04Declan Donnelly?

  I do love the air fryer.

• 8:05Ant McPartlin?

  What are you gonna do with your backup one? You don't need it. Nobody needs a backup air fryer.

• 8:08Declan Donnelly?

  No, I don't really need a back, and it's exactly the same as the one I've got at home. I think I bought one myself and probably hid it from the current Mrs. Donnelly and then she bought me one for Christmas.

• 8:18Ant McPartlin?

  Ah, well, you can't tell her then that, that you've got two.

• 8:21Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, she knows she was there. She was there. I was like, oh, I know. I, but, but I played dumb. I was like, I don't know where it came from. I don't know, maybe.

• 8:29Ant McPartlin?

  What, what do you mean you're playing dumb? Like someone's gonna break into your load storage, your lock open, put an air fryer in there? Where did this come from?

• 8:38Declan Donnelly?

  But I was like, oh, we must have accumulated somewhere along the line.

• 8:41Ant McPartlin?

  Those reverse burglars have broken in and left stuff.

• 8:45Declan Donnelly?

  But anyway, her parting words were, get rid of it.

• 8:49Ant McPartlin?

  Why don't you, I'm sure one of the viewers, one of our listeners would have it. Would you give it away to one of them?

• 8:55Declan Donnelly?

  I'd just wanna give it away.

• 8:58Ant McPartlin?

  Well, they're not gonna buy it off you.

• 8:59Declan Donnelly?

  Very expensive.

• 9:00Ant McPartlin?

  Why don't, why don't, if I get in touch with them, right, and get things that they would swap with your air fryer, are you up for that?

• 9:09Declan Donnelly?

  All right, yeah, I'll swap me air fryer. I'll swap me air fryer for something.

• 9:12Ant McPartlin?

  For, with anything?

• 9:13Declan Donnelly?

  Anything. Give us your best shot.

• 9:15Ant McPartlin?

  What would you swap for an air fryer? So Dex.

• 9:19Declan Donnelly?

  Have you got anything at home you don't want, or you've got doubles off?

• 9:21Ant McPartlin?

  It can't be all crap.

• 9:23Declan Donnelly?

  No, no, no, no, I want good stuff.

• 9:24Ant McPartlin?

  This is, this is a brand new air fryer, I presume?

• 9:27Declan Donnelly?

  Brand new, still boxed.

• 9:28Ant McPartlin?

  Still boxed. So it's a brand new air fryer, still in the box?

• 9:30Declan Donnelly?

  One careful, famous order.

• 9:33Ant McPartlin?

  No, no, no, don't put that in there. You don't put that in ads in the paper, do you? So we're gonna swap the air fryer. If you have got anything to swap with Dex's air fryer, get in touch. Hang in out at beltabox.com.

• 9:45Declan Donnelly?

  Will you, will you?

• 9:46Ant McPartlin?

  Address it to me.

• 9:47Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 9:47Ant McPartlin?

  And I will put a list together for the next pod.

• 9:51Declan Donnelly?

  Okay.

• 9:52Ant McPartlin?

  And I will present you some options to swap it with, and then we can do a swap.

• 9:57Declan Donnelly?

  Great. I'm up for that. That's exciting.

• 9:59Ant McPartlin?

  Good. I feel like we've got a new item for the podcast. It feels like that, doesn't it?

• 10:04Speaker 07

  What should we call it?

• 10:05Ant McPartlin?

  Don't let me down. What you call it? Call me Swap Shop. That's been, that's been done. That's been done. Trade, trade, trading places? Trading famous guy swaps things?

• 10:15Declan Donnelly?

  Famous stuff.

• 10:16Ant McPartlin?

  Famous guy swaps things. Will you sign it?

• 10:18Declan Donnelly?

  If you like, will that, will that give more value to it?

• 10:21Ant McPartlin?

  More kudos? Yeah, you can sign it.

• 10:23Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, I can do that.

• 10:24Ant McPartlin?

  You can sign it in a marker pen, but a celebratory one, celebratory or bold one. Metallic pen. Metallic pen, yeah, because it was short, it was short, Bella.

• 10:30Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 10:30Ant McPartlin?

  So I sign it all, so am I not allowed?

• 10:32Declan Donnelly?

  I wouldn't, I, no.

• 10:33Ant McPartlin?

  It would be better if we both signed it. Who just wants your signature? You want the full, you want the full set, don't you? Don't you?

• 10:40Speaker 07

  Yeah.

• 10:41Ant McPartlin?

  She's not trying to think about it, is she? Like, she's not, she just wants yours.

• 10:44Declan Donnelly?

  And that was a fob off, yeah.

• 10:46Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, yeah, if you like.

• 10:47Declan Donnelly?

  It was a fob off. Oh, that's good, though.

• 10:49Ant McPartlin?

  Good, okay.

• 10:50Declan Donnelly?

  Get your stuff into Ant and let's swap.

• 10:55Ant McPartlin?

  You haven't had a chance to watch anything, have you? No, I've been too busy. I've looked at the listings of what's currently on, what's coming up. Have we got something that we could all watch together? I think we have got something we can all watch together. Go on. It's called The Miniature Wife. Why did you pick that?

• 11:12Ant McPartlin?

  What? Why did you pick that? What do you mean? Is that a dig? At you. Not at you. No. It feels like one. It's not a dig at you. It's not a dig at you. It's called The Miniature Wife. Oh, here we go. And it's about a wife who gets shrunk. It's a bit like a Honey, I Shrunk My Wife. Honey, I Shrunk My Wife, yeah. But it's a 10 part series on Sky and Now TV. I've got to watch 10 parts of this little woman. Yeah, it's meant me good. Starring Matthew McFadyen. Like him a lot? You like him? Yes. And Elizabeth Banks. Okay, yes. Like her too? I like her. So it looks really fun. This is more promising. So there's 10 episodes we can kind of watch over the next couple of weeks. Okay. Then we'll all report back. That's me, you, Heckless Corner and all of you lot.

• 11:54Ant McPartlin?

  If we could all watch The Miniature Wife and we'll report back to give it its proper official banana rating. I do feel a bit bad about really digging out The Last Frontier when I've removed all of my bananas. My wife watched last week's pod and we said I was too harsh. Oh dear. So I've got to at least leave a couple of bananas there. Oh god, this has gone on for weeks. It's a bit of a saga, isn't it? It's a saga. Everybody's passed it. Everybody's moved on. We've passed it. We've moved on. I just feel bad. I feel bad. So we'll leave a couple of bananas on there, will we? Why? If you don't mind. And I'm not allowed to banana rate Clearbus yet, am I? No. Until I've watched the series. No, you're not there yet. It's so good though, Dan. Is it good? Oh, you'll really like it. You really will. I know you, don't I? Yes, you do.

• 12:39Ant McPartlin?

  And I know you'll like it. But I'll come back to it properly when I've finished watching it. Okay. Okay. No banana rating until it's over. Okay. Okay.

• 12:48Declan Donnelly?

  Banana, oh, got a, got an air, paper airplane coming in here. That means breaking news in the world of hanging out. Hi, Aunt and Dec. This is from Becky Reed in Nailsworth.

• 12:59Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, hi Becky Reed.

• 12:59Declan Donnelly?

  Nailsworth.

• 13:00Ant McPartlin?

  Where's Nailsworth? Ever been?

• 13:03Declan Donnelly?

  Never been.

• 13:04Ant McPartlin?

  Never been. Yeah, like to go, yeah.

• 13:06Declan Donnelly?

  Nailsworth. Sounds hard as nails.

• 13:08Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, it does, doesn't it?

• 13:10Declan Donnelly?

  Thanks for your letter, Becky. Hi, boys. I recently got a new fitness watch and after popping it on for an evening, I checked the stats and my jaw dropped. The measurement for calories burnt is in bananas.

• 13:23Ant McPartlin?

  What?

• 13:25Declan Donnelly?

  I'm gonna try and get eight bananas. Love the pod, respect, guys. Becky Reed. What? Look at that.

• 13:29Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, my God, it is as well.

• 13:31Declan Donnelly?

  Up on the screen here, we've got calories burnt. She's burned 134.8 calories, killer calories. Active calories equals 1.3 bananas.

• 13:40Ant McPartlin?

  That is amazing. So we've infiltrated fitness watches. That's fantastic.

• 13:46Declan Donnelly?

  That is brilliant. We are spreading the bananas far and wide.

• 13:51Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, banana reach.

• 13:53Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, banana reach.

• 13:53Ant McPartlin?

  Further.

• 13:54Declan Donnelly?

  Got one here from Luke Bennett. Says, hello, Aunt and Dec. I thought after listening to Jamie Oliver on a different and much more inferior podcast.

• 14:01Ant McPartlin?

  Thank you.

• 14:01Declan Donnelly?

  He first put the idea of the Saks underpants into my head. After listening to Ant's pants story, I was inspired to finally give them a go.

• 14:10Ant McPartlin?

  Oh.

• 14:12Declan Donnelly?

  They were okay, so I think five bananas was generous.

• 14:16Ant McPartlin?

  For me.

• 14:17Declan Donnelly?

  For the Saks.

• 14:19Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, yeah.

• 14:20Declan Donnelly?

  This means the search continues. So do I break the bank and try Ant's pants?

• 14:24Ant McPartlin?

  Yes, you do.

• 14:25Declan Donnelly?

  In brackets, new ones, of course. See my review below, fueling the Jamie Oliver beef. Yours, Luke Bennett.

• 14:31Ant McPartlin?

  Luke, two minutes ago, at one, two, three, four, five bananas, a generous five bananas. Jamie Oliver oversold them to me, the silly goose. Nice support for the old boys. However, they're not worth the money in terms of quality.

• 14:46Declan Donnelly?

  What a brilliant review, Luke.

• 14:47Ant McPartlin?

  That's a great review and a very generous five bananas. I would suggest to you though, Luke, do shell out the money just for one pair, one pair of black CDLPs in your preferred size and it'll be the best money you've ever spent. I still haven't got any free.

• 15:06Declan Donnelly?

  No frees, no kickback?

• 15:07Ant McPartlin?

  No kickback, nothing. They haven't even said thank you.

• 15:10Declan Donnelly?

  Verified purchase.

• 15:11Ant McPartlin?

  No, no, but at least say thank you.

• 15:13Declan Donnelly?

  Who, CDLP?

• 15:14Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 15:14Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, they're probably.

• 15:15Ant McPartlin?

  At least get in touch and just say cheers for the mention and nothing.

• 15:21Ant McPartlin?

  Is it time for the diary?

• 15:21Declan Donnelly?

  It could be, it could be.

• 15:23Ant McPartlin?

  Because I think so. We've got the logo on there. Dex on his bed in his dirty socks. Do we have a jingle for the diary?

• 15:30Speaker 07

  We do. This is from Libby.

• 15:32Ant McPartlin?

  From Libby. Let's hear it.

• 15:33Declan Donnelly?

  Thanks, Libby.

• 15:37Speaker 08

  It's Tex Diary again. We don't know what will happen, but will Tex get his hairdryer today? Will the club even have a stay today? Or will they get pushed into the DJ? Will Anne ever be invited on the photo session?

• 15:52Ant McPartlin?

  No.

• 15:52Speaker 08

  Well, you'll find all of this out today.

• 15:55Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, well, life on the road, eh?

• 15:58Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, that's very good.

• 15:59Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, Libby.

• 16:00Ant McPartlin?

  Very good.

• 16:01Declan Donnelly?

  That is so cute. Thank you so much.

• 16:04Ant McPartlin?

  Homemade, organic, beautiful. That was really good. Thanks, Libby. That's very, very good. My favourite so far.

• 16:10Declan Donnelly?

  It's the 10th of April, 1994.

• 16:13Ant McPartlin?

  Okay.

• 16:13Declan Donnelly?

  Sunday.

• 16:14Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, day of rest.

• 16:16Declan Donnelly?

  Day after live and kicking.

• 16:17Ant McPartlin?

  Hmm, day of rest?

• 16:19Declan Donnelly?

  Day of rest.

• 16:20Ant McPartlin?

  Ah.

• 16:21Declan Donnelly?

  Day 14 of life on the road. Boy, was I tired today.

• 16:24Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, I bet you were. What a busy day you had yesterday.

• 16:27Declan Donnelly?

  Very busy day. All the sleep I've missed must have crept up on me today because I barely had the energy for anything.

• 16:35Ant McPartlin?

  Really?

• 16:36Declan Donnelly?

  Hmm.

• 16:37Ant McPartlin?

  Working hard. That's working hard. That's a pop star. They work you hard.

• 16:40Declan Donnelly?

  They certainly do. Had to get up out of bed before 11 o'clock in the morning. That was really tough. We left Kent about 10:45 and arrived at the dance studio at 12:30.

• 16:50Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, God. How, oh, what an awful Sunday. That sense shivers down my spine. Dance rehearsals. I used to hate them. Anyway, I'm interrupting your diary. Can please carry on, but I bet I didn't enjoy it.

• 17:03Declan Donnelly?

  We were half an hour late.

• 17:04Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, that was me. I didn't want to go. I was crying in the bathroom.

• 17:08Declan Donnelly?

  This hot choreographer.

• 17:10Ant McPartlin?

  What?

• 17:10Declan Donnelly?

  We heard about was just really.

• 17:14Ant McPartlin?

  Ah, ah, ah. Oh, brilliant.

• 17:19Declan Donnelly?

  I don't know who that is. I don't know who it was.

• 17:20Ant McPartlin?

  Go express and have to name check them, because they might have got better since then.

• 17:23Declan Donnelly?

  Not too hot at all.

• 17:24Ant McPartlin?

  Oh.

• 17:25Declan Donnelly?

  We went till 2pm, had an hour for lunch.

• 17:28Ant McPartlin?

  Uh huh.

• 17:29Declan Donnelly?

  Then 3 till 5.

• 17:31Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, what an awful Sunday.

• 17:34Declan Donnelly?

  I got a bit ratty and short tempered towards the end.

• 17:38Ant McPartlin?

  Really? You put that in the diary? Well done for owning it, bro.

• 17:41Declan Donnelly?

  I must have felt that.

• 17:42Ant McPartlin?

  Just to yourself, not to anyone else.

• 17:43Declan Donnelly?

  Like genuinely.

• 17:44Ant McPartlin?

  Didn't apologise to anyone.

• 17:46Declan Donnelly?

  Maybe I did. Anyway, I phoned my sister, whose birthday it is, and on the way home, I fell asleep in the car. Something I never normally do.

• 17:54Ant McPartlin?

  No, no, he doesn't.

• 17:55Declan Donnelly?

  And I fell asleep again in front of the telly tonight. Something I don't normally do.

• 18:03Declan Donnelly?

  Now I'm tucked up in bed, ready for peepees.

• 18:06Ant McPartlin?

  What? No, you're telling her I peepees. She has as well. P E E P Y S. Ready for peepees. Night, night. What the hell? Who are you writing it to?

• 18:20Declan Donnelly?

  Just this, just June.

• 18:21Ant McPartlin?

  The universe. Night, night, universe. Time for peepees.

• 18:25Declan Donnelly?

  So not a lot going on today, apart from a very frustrated choreography session. But next week, the 11th of April, 1994. Day 15 of Life on the Road is Release Day.

• 18:39Ant McPartlin?

  For why me? Oh, that's exciting.

• 18:41Declan Donnelly?

  We release our second single.

• 18:43Ant McPartlin?

  Have you wrote Release Day and then put stars around it?

• 18:46Declan Donnelly?

  I have indeed.

• 18:46Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, that's good. Oh, that would be exciting. I'll tell you what's also exciting is, you know, we love it when. I've got a letter in here. I've got an aeroplane coming in.

• 18:57Ant McPartlin?

  You know, we love it when we hear your diary. But I love it even more when we get replies and we get other people's diaries.

• 19:04Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, yeah.

• 19:05Ant McPartlin?

  Let me read you this.

• 19:06Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, God, it's not a choreographer, is it?

• 19:09Ant McPartlin?

  Cast your minds back a couple of weeks to the 4th of April entry where you played at Marilyn's nightclub in Hereford.

• 19:15Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 19:15Ant McPartlin?

  Your hair got yanked, do you remember that, Dex? My hat was swiped.

• 19:19Declan Donnelly?

  Swiped.

• 19:20Ant McPartlin?

  Nearly swiped. A couple of people from the crowd from that day have been in touch.

• 19:25Declan Donnelly?

  No, was it the yanker and the swiper?

• 19:27Ant McPartlin?

  Might be the yanker and the swiper, you yanker and swiper. Dear Aunt Dex and team.

• 19:32Speaker 07

  Hey, hi.

• 19:33Ant McPartlin?

  Thank you. Absolutely loving the podcast, it's brought me so much joy. 10 bananas from me.

• 19:37Declan Donnelly?

  Ooh.

• 19:38Ant McPartlin?

  Doesn't count, doesn't count, has to be a.

• 19:40Declan Donnelly?

  Maximum, is it?

• 19:40Ant McPartlin?

  I was beyond delighted to hear my local nightclub Marilyn's mentioned in Dex's diary a few weeks ago. I was hoping we would get a mention as I remember the night well. It was, in bold, the best night of my life. I'd always rather see the extract from my 1994 diary for that night with one very particular highlight. Respect guys, Emma. Shall I get the diary?

• 20:07Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 20:07Ant McPartlin?

  Okay.

• 20:08Declan Donnelly?

  We love the diaries.

• 20:10Ant McPartlin?

  Here it is.

• 20:10Declan Donnelly?

  Let me just recap on it.

• 20:11Ant McPartlin?

  You go back to your diary.

• 20:13Declan Donnelly?

  The crowd were brilliant, they screamed their heads off and nearly pulled our pants down. I got my hair yanked and nearly had his hat swiped. Apart from that, they were brill.

• 20:25Ant McPartlin?

  Right, that was Dex's diary entry for Monday the 4th of April 1994. This is Emma's diary entry for Monday the 4th of April 1994. Dear diary, I went to Marilyn's tonight.

• 20:38Declan Donnelly?

  Amazing.

• 20:38Ant McPartlin?

  It was excellent fun. I had a great time and I saw PJ and Duncan from Biker Grove. I kissed Duncan on the lips. On the lips.

• 20:52Declan Donnelly?

  Probably.

• 20:53Ant McPartlin?

  Underline, she's underlined lips, so it was definitely lips. That's not a mistake, she's kissed you on the lips. I can't believe it. The atmosphere in the place was amazing. And there were two cages, right, with dancers in, mostly male. Mostly.

• 21:12Declan Donnelly?

  Mostly.

• 21:13Ant McPartlin?

  Sometimes they even took off their tops. Exclamation mark. I had a great time. Bet you did, Emma. I've never danced so much in my life. I was sweating buckets. I will never forget. PG and Duncan for as long as I live. I'm tired now, so I'm off to sleep.

• 21:35Declan Donnelly?

  Peepies.

• 21:36Ant McPartlin?

  She doesn't say peepies. Good night. Love, Emma.

• 21:40Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, Emma.

• 21:41Ant McPartlin?

  Thanks, Emma. Thank you for your diary entry. So you kissed her on the lips, did you?

• 21:46Declan Donnelly?

  Probably, maybe, yeah.

• 21:46Ant McPartlin?

  In 1994?

• 21:47Declan Donnelly?

  Very possible.

• 21:48Ant McPartlin?

  Do you remember that? You don't remember that? That's a she-wasn't memorable kiss. She said it was great.

• 21:53Declan Donnelly?

  It probably was.

• 21:54Ant McPartlin?

  Are you a good kisser?

• 21:55Declan Donnelly?

  Yes.

• 21:56Ant McPartlin?

  But you don't like kissing. Historically, you really don't.

• 21:59Declan Donnelly?

  No, I do like kissing, just not as much as you.

• 22:01Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, okay, okay.

• 22:02Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah. Oh, that is lovely.

• 22:04Ant McPartlin?

  Good, eh?

• 22:05Declan Donnelly?

  Oh.

• 22:05Ant McPartlin?

  You like that? Please send in your diary entries if they, and if they correlate to anything that Dex talks about in his diary, even better. Well, even if they don't, if it's just round about that time.

• 22:15Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 22:15Ant McPartlin?

  Even if you're going to see other people on tour, let us know, because we love it.

• 22:21Ant McPartlin?

  This is an advert for Gemini, Google's personal AI assistant.

• 22:26Declan Donnelly?

  So now we've got our listener map and we know that our reach.

• 22:29Ant McPartlin?

  Yes, we know the reach is.

• 22:30Declan Donnelly?

  Is growing throughout the world.

• 22:31Ant McPartlin?

  Growing, yes.

• 22:32Declan Donnelly?

  It got me thinking, I want to visit some more places throughout the world, places I've never been before. So I thought.

• 22:37Ant McPartlin?

  Ask Gemini.

• 22:38Declan Donnelly?

  Why don't we ask Gemini for some good holiday location recommendations?

• 22:41Ant McPartlin?

  Come on then. Right, okay. Gemini, where can I go which is hot?

• 22:44Declan Donnelly?

  Hot, hot.

• 22:44Ant McPartlin?

  And plenty of bananas. Where would you recommend?

• 22:47Speaker 09

  If you're looking for hot destinations with plenty of tropical fruits like bananas.

• 22:52Ant McPartlin?

  Yes.

• 22:53Speaker 09

  Costa Rica is a great option, known for its banana plantations. The Canary Islands, particularly Tenerife, also have banana farm tours and warm weather.

• 23:04Declan Donnelly?

  Gemini, could you flip a digital coin to choose between Costa Rica and Tenerife?

• 23:11Ant McPartlin?

  Can you do that?

• 23:11Speaker 09

  Heads for Tenerife, tails for Costa Rica.

• 23:14Ant McPartlin?

  Come on.

• 23:14Speaker 09

  And it's. Heads. So Tenerife it is, according to the coin.

• 23:19Ant McPartlin?

  Thanks Gemini.

• 23:20Speaker 09

  Have a fantastic holiday.

• 23:22Ant McPartlin?

  We will.

• 23:23Declan Donnelly?

  We will. We will. We'll send you a postcard. We'll send you a postcard. With Gemini, you can chat with a truly helpful AI assistant.

• 23:30Ant McPartlin?

  You jump in, brainstorm ideas, ask for more details. You can even show it what you're talking about.

• 23:35Declan Donnelly?

  It's there for a real chat, not just a quick question and done.

• 23:39Ant McPartlin?

  Download the Gemini app today to unlock the real power of Google AI on your phone.

• 23:45Declan Donnelly?

  Check responses. Setup required.

• 23:46Ant McPartlin?

  Compatibility and availability varies. Eighteen plus.

• 23:52Declan Donnelly?

  Ooh.

• 23:53Ant McPartlin?

  No plane in, which fell short.

• 23:57Declan Donnelly?

  Little plane flying into the studio. What does it say? What does it say? Is there anything to swap for the Airline yet?

• 24:01Ant McPartlin?

  Not yet. This pod hasn't been out yet. So we can't, we can't talk about it. It says, we watched Alien Autopsy last week.

• 24:08Declan Donnelly?

  Uh oh.

• 24:09Ant McPartlin?

  And have had an influx of scripts in the inbox. Ideas for your long awaited second film.

• 24:15Declan Donnelly?

  Oh.

• 24:16Ant McPartlin?

  This week is Karenza Gardner's script. Karenza? Good name. Is that real? They made that up. It's like Bethan. No one's called Karenza. She imagined us as gravelly, East End gangsters. Okay? The scripts are in the drawers behind you. And there's also hats and toothpicks in the drawer. What? I've got hats if we need them. I've got toothpicks if we need them. Not great accents, but I'll give it a good go. Just for you, Karina, Karenza.

• 24:49Declan Donnelly?

  Night. A dimly lit alley on an East London street. Rain is crashing down. Two rival gang leaders stand across from each other. Jay, young, baseball cap. It's you.

• 25:02Ant McPartlin?

  Is that me?

• 25:02Declan Donnelly?

  Toothpick and mouth.

• 25:04Ant McPartlin?

  No, that's you, Jay, isn't it?

• 25:05Declan Donnelly?

  Am I Jay?

• 25:05Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, go on, you have that.

• 25:08Declan Donnelly?

  Jay, young, baseball cap, toothpick and mouth. Bomber jacket. Stands across from Marcus. An old school geezer.

• 25:17Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, that's me.

• 25:19Declan Donnelly?

  Mysterious hat. Strong, strong.

• 25:25Ant McPartlin?

  So I'm serious?

• 25:26Declan Donnelly?

  So serious.

• 25:27Ant McPartlin?

  Okay.

• 25:27Declan Donnelly?

  Strong Cockney gravelly accent.

• 25:30Ant McPartlin?

  There's a lot going on there, isn't there? Strong Cockney.

• 25:33Declan Donnelly?

  Both men abruptly draw their guns at the same time.

• 25:37Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, have a spoon. We don't have guns. Alright, let me just practise. What, mate? Oh, yeah. Yeah, you what? That's me.

• 25:45Declan Donnelly?

  Am I, um?

• 25:46Ant McPartlin?

  What are you talking about?

• 25:47Declan Donnelly?

  Am I?

• 25:48Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, yeah.

• 25:48Declan Donnelly?

  Am I Cockney as well, then?

• 25:50Ant McPartlin?

  I presume so. We're Cockney geezers, aren't we?

• 25:52Declan Donnelly?

  Right, okay.

• 25:53Ant McPartlin?

  Cockney gangsters.

• 25:54Declan Donnelly?

  Right.

• 25:54Ant McPartlin?

  Right, I'm Marcus.

• 25:55Declan Donnelly?

  Marcus starts first.

• 25:56Ant McPartlin?

  It's funny. How the woods ends up like this? You and me.

• 26:02Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah. Thought I'd be the one putting you in the ground years ago.

• 26:06Ant McPartlin?

  You had your chances. Nice toothpick.

• 26:10Declan Donnelly?

  Nice hat.

• 26:11Ant McPartlin?

  They step closer in sync. You took everything, the money, my ass, and still you got the nerve to mock me. You're gonna pay, little Jay, one way or another.

• 26:23Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, and you're innocent, are ya? You took my brother.

• 26:27Ant McPartlin?

  I told ya, I don't know anything about her.

• 26:30Declan Donnelly?

  Daniel. His name was Daniel. Don't you play, damn old man. Marcus freezes. The tension shifts.

• 26:37Ant McPartlin?

  What did you say his name was?

• 26:39Declan Donnelly?

  Daniel. Marcus lowers his gun a fraction. Don't play games with me. I wanna know what happened to him.

• 26:45Ant McPartlin?

  That's... That's... My brother's name?

• 26:50Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, leave off. You can't pull the wool over my eyes. Today's the day you pay for your sins, old man.

• 27:00Ant McPartlin?

  Both of our accents have gone up, they've gone down, they've gone up. Now you've got old, you were young.

• 27:05Declan Donnelly?

  Was I?

• 27:05Ant McPartlin?

  Okay. I'm serious. You went missing when we were kids. Social service to split us up?

• 27:11Declan Donnelly?

  Jay looks confused. What?

• 27:14Ant McPartlin?

  I'm not messing with you, Jay. I had a younger brother. Daniel.

• 27:20Declan Donnelly?

  My mum said I had another brother, older than Daniel. But my stepdad took him before I could remember.

• 27:27Ant McPartlin?

  You got a scar? Left side? Knee ribs?

• 27:32Declan Donnelly?

  Jay hesitates, then reveals it.

• 27:35Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. It was me! I was playing. I pushed ya. Is this dummy?

• 27:41Declan Donnelly?

  Yes, it is.

• 27:42Ant McPartlin?

  Jay? That's not your real name, is it?

• 27:46Declan Donnelly?

  Jay goes still. Jamie.

• 27:49Ant McPartlin?

  Jamie. It's me.

• 27:53Declan Donnelly?

  That's twisted.

• 27:54Ant McPartlin?

  All this time, and we've been at each other's necks.

• 27:58Declan Donnelly?

  Do that line again.

• 27:58Ant McPartlin?

  It's not a great line. It needs to rewrite. All this time, we've been at each other's necks.

• 28:04Declan Donnelly?

  They stand there, no longer enemies, but brothers. So what now?

• 28:07Ant McPartlin?

  Now, we decide what matters more, blood or everything we've done.

• 28:13Declan Donnelly?

  Sirens grow louder. They exchange a heavy, uncertain look. Scene.

• 28:24Ant McPartlin?

  Have EastEnders been in touch yet? Have they? Have they? I think you're on the phone. That was good.

• 28:29Declan Donnelly?

  What? Who was that from?

• 28:30Ant McPartlin?

  That was from the name that we couldn't believe exists.

• 28:33Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, yeah.

• 28:34Ant McPartlin?

  Carenza. Well done, Carenza Gardner.

• 28:36Declan Donnelly?

  Carenza.

• 28:37Ant McPartlin?

  Very, very good.

• 28:38Declan Donnelly?

  There's something in that.

• 28:39Ant McPartlin?

  I look forward to hearing the rest of that script. That was very good. My favourite one so far.

• 28:43Declan Donnelly?

  And if we don't get it away, we will send it to Danny's eye or just straight to EastEnders.

• 28:49Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah.

• 28:50Declan Donnelly?

  Sounds like a good storyline.

• 28:51Ant McPartlin?

  Very good.

• 28:52Speaker 10

  Your accents were eight bananas there.

• 28:55Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah. Sometimes, not all the time. They were very up and down, I would say. Thanks, Lola.

• 29:00Declan Donnelly?

  Need a little bit of work.

• 29:01Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, a little bit of coaching.

• 29:03Declan Donnelly?

  If you've got any film scripts you want us to read, and if they're good enough, we will take them and pitch them to Warner Brothers, 20th Century Fox, Columbia.

• 29:15Ant McPartlin?

  Columbia.

• 29:16Declan Donnelly?

  A24, Pixar, even Pixar.

• 29:19Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, Pixar. That'd be good. We could do voices for a Pixar movie.

• 29:23Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, we could do that.

• 29:24Ant McPartlin?

  Couldn't we? Get in touch, Pixar.

• 29:26Declan Donnelly?

  We can do Cockney now, apparently.

• 29:27Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, we can. Said Lola.

• 29:29Declan Donnelly?

  This all started because the famous author, William Boyd, said he had an idea for a film for us and we never got to hear what it was. So if you've got an idea for a film, we'll try and get it made.

• 29:39Ant McPartlin?

  I can't believe Jay and Marcus were actually brothers.

• 29:42Declan Donnelly?

  All the time.

• 29:43Ant McPartlin?

  All the time. Can you believe that? It's a good end, that. It's a very good end.

• 29:47Declan Donnelly?

  I didn't see that coming.

• 29:47Ant McPartlin?

  I didn't see that coming. It was a good, good twist. Tell you what I really want.

• 29:51Declan Donnelly?

  What you really, really want?

• 29:52Ant McPartlin?

  A rom-com.

• 29:53Declan Donnelly?

  Me and you in a rom-com?

• 29:54Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, that'd be good.

• 29:55Declan Donnelly?

  In like a Brokeback Mountain rom-com?

• 29:57Ant McPartlin?

  Well, we don't have to get off with each other, but it could be like a love interest.

• 30:01Declan Donnelly?

  We don't have to.

• 30:03Ant McPartlin?

  We don't have to, but you know me, I like a kiss.

• 30:05Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, we could have a, we could have a love interest.

• 30:07Ant McPartlin?

  A female in the middle.

• 30:08Declan Donnelly?

  And we should try and get an actress to, uh, read the female part.

• 30:12Ant McPartlin?

  If Margot Robbie is around, we've done her a favour by doing the, um, birthday video. So this is, it's only fair really that she reads with us.

• 30:22Declan Donnelly?

  It's just a table read, it's not a commitment to making the movie.

• 30:25Ant McPartlin?

  She doesn't have to make the movie, it's just an hour of her time. Or anyone, you know, we're desperate. We're desperate here. So can you, one of you, write a rom-com script and send it in? And we will read it with an actress and hopefully this will be the start of our Hollywood rom-com career.

• 30:45Speaker 00

  Ugh, I hate Mondays.

• 30:47Speaker 01

  King's Hawaiian cinnamon swirl bite?

• 30:49Speaker 00

  Uh, Taylor Hansen? Sure, I'll try one. Mmm.

• 30:54Speaker 02

  Hey, let's get back to work, please.

• 30:56Speaker 00

  But Taylor Hansen's making my day way better with these new soft and swirly King's Hawaiian cinnamon bites.

• 31:00Speaker 02

  Taylor Hansen? Nice.

• 31:02Speaker 01

  Try one.

• 31:04Speaker 02

  Mmm.

• 31:08Speaker 03

  King's Hawaiian cinnamon bites. There's nothing like it.

• 31:16Speaker 04

  Now, more than ever, we need someone on our side. But Rob Whitman? Whitman's votes drove up costs, cut Medicaid and risked 350,000 Virginians' healthcare to pay for tax breaks for himself and his donors. He's not on our side. Shannon Taylor will fight corruption, cut taxes and bring down costs. This November, vote for Shannon Taylor. She's for us. Paid for by HMP, the HouseMajorityPac.com. Not authorised by any candidate or candidate's committee.

• 31:46Ant McPartlin?

  Wee! Woah, woah, woah. We've got a paper aeroplane coming in here with some info on it. Is it any swaps already? No, no, no, we've lit when you said it. I'm excited though. You're going a bit too early there. I'm excited. We'll have to wait till the next pod to get some replies. It's an aeroplane, it's a letter, it says, "Hi, Ant and Dec!" Hi. Exclamation mark, exclamation mark, exclamation mark. This is gonna be a fun letter. Firstly, I wanna say I absolutely love the pod. Thank you very much. I've been a fan since the biker days and the first record I ever bought was... Tonight, I'm free. Why me? Why me? Why me? Our second single, on vinyl. Woo! Complete with fold-out poster, which I still have. Anyway, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot. "I can definitely beat the size of Aaron's telly." No, he can't. "Aaron's telly last week..." Yes.

• 32:31Ant McPartlin?

  "...was 120 inches." It's a big telly. How do you... There isn't a bigger telly than that, surely. Well, we'll find out. "This is how I watch every episode," says writer. "Can you spot the banana for scale? Loads of love, Laura in Poole, Dorset." So here's Laura's telly! What? That's massive! Up on the screen there, we've got a huge telly and a very small banana underneath it for scale. I don't think that's a telly. I think that's a projector. That's a projector screen. Does that still count? Not in my book. Not in my book either, Laura from Poole and Dorset. I'm afraid we're gonna have to scratch that from the records. Erase that from the records, Laura. That never happened, okay? Laura, Laura's projector. Good way to watch, though.

• 33:16Ant McPartlin?

  It is a very good way to watch. It looks good on the big screen. It does look good on the big screen. The pod. I'd like to know, though, how many more people watch this on telly? Because the most of the people I speak to when I'm outing about, about the pod, watch it on their telly. Do they, really? Yeah, they do, yeah. That doesn't count. It doesn't, it's projector. Projector screen. Nah, sorry, sorry about that. Good effort, though. Good effort. And Aaron, you're still in the lead with your 100 and... 20 incher. With your 120 incher. Well done, well done, Aaron. Well done, big lad. Well done, big lad. Just over your shoulder. Laura, over my shoulder? Over your shoulder. If this goes in. You get a hold of it in Vegas. I get a hold of Vegas? Yeah. And your air fryer? Oh. Bad? Bad. Was it bad? Okay. Yeah. I'm sorry. What was her name? Laura?

• 34:01Ant McPartlin?

  Laura, from Poole. Thanks for the letter, Laura. But... Doesn't count. Doesn't count. It's a projector. She'll have some letters? Yes, please. I've got some in the postbag. Let me just go and get it. Here you go. You still don't accent again? No, that was my voice. Okay. Here you go. Here you go, mate. It did go a bit cockney geyser then. Here you go, mate. Choose your weapons. Gastro, a little bit. Right, shall I, shall I start? This one says, hi, Anthony. Nearly 20 years ago, I gave birth to my third son. Oh. And named him Declan. Yay! So I had my own little Deck. Woo-hoo! Though he's not so little anymore. Then I went on to have my fourth son. And I did think about naming him Anthony.

• 34:43Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, but didn't want to risk having a baby Tony. Emoji laugh, emoji laugh. So I named him Rocky. Oh. Seriously? So you've named your third son after Deck? And your fourth son after Deck's dog?

• 35:01Ant McPartlin?

  Then recently I heard Deck had a dog and named him Rocky. What a coincidence. Is it though? Is it? Is it a coincidence? Really love the podcast. Love you both. Always a fan. Respect, guys. Lisa Mayfield from Warsaw. Well, thank you, Lisa Mayfield. But you've had four kids. Hold on, she's had four sons? Oh. And not one of them's called Anthony? Oh, no. One of them's named after your dog? How insulting is that?

• 35:29Ant McPartlin?

  She named one after Jamie Oliver. What? She named one after Jamie Oliver. Did she? One after, uh, Chris Martin. Oh, you're worrying me, Oliver. I genuinely thought she did that for a second. I've got no problem with Chris Martin. No problem. No, no problem. I'm not going to stop beefing with Chris Martin. You know that. I haven't been with him. Nicest man. And Jamie Oliver is a very nice man. But I'm still annoyed. Because no one's that busy.

• 35:52Declan Donnelly?

  I've got one here from Sophie who's listening in Surrey. She says, hi Auntie Deck. I'm currently training to run the London Marathon at the end of this month for Breakthrough T1D. A very important charity to me as I am type one diabetic. I've been saving up both episodes each week and you guys making me laugh for an hour really helps me get through the runs.

• 36:12Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, that's nice.

• 36:12Declan Donnelly?

  A shout out this Sunday would really help as I head into my last week of training. I'd give marathon training one banana.

• 36:19Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, I bet.

• 36:20Declan Donnelly?

  Wish me luck for the 26th of April. Respect guys from Sophie. Sophie!

• 36:25Ant McPartlin?

  Good luck Sophie!

• 36:26Declan Donnelly?

  Have a brilliant time. You can do it.

• 36:28Ant McPartlin?

  Now, run faster, run faster, run faster, run faster!

• 36:31Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, brilliant stuff. Well done. Anybody that does a marathon gets respect from me.

• 36:35Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, same. Respect guys to all of you marathon runners and half marathon runners.

• 36:39Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 36:39Ant McPartlin?

  It's tough, isn't it?

• 36:40Declan Donnelly?

  I've never done it. Nah. Do you know what? I've always wanted to do the Great North Run.

• 36:43Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, I have as well. I just don't know if I could do it. I need to do a bit of training because I've got me knees.

• 36:49Declan Donnelly?

  You've got dodgy knees, right?

• 36:50Ant McPartlin?

  Got a dodgy knee and I'm not quite sure I could run that far.

• 36:52Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, no, I couldn't do it.

• 36:53Ant McPartlin?

  We did the Great North Run. We started the Great North Run one year and we were on the start line. And the guy fires the gun and everyone starts running and we kind of leant out naturally and gives, give the first couple of runners a high five. Then after that, everybody realised, oh, they're giving out high fives. So we didn't want to give one to one and not the rest of them. So we just stayed there giving high fives for the whole of the runners who were running the Great North Run.

• 37:21Declan Donnelly?

  Till every single person had started the Great North Run.

• 37:24Ant McPartlin?

  We were there for ages and it was brilliant, but after a while I had to swap hands and do it that way. I do the other hand because that hand was hurting. At the end of it, Deck bruised it quite easily, right? And at the end of it, his hands were like, his feet were like plums. They're like red, red, purple like plums.

• 37:40Declan Donnelly?

  And there was I with bruised palms.

• 37:44Ant McPartlin?

  My little plummy hands.

• 37:46Declan Donnelly?

  What?

• 37:48Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 37:49Speaker 07

  Do you know how many people run the Great North Run?

• 37:51Ant McPartlin?

  Oh, it's thousands. It's like 50,000, isn't it?

• 37:53Speaker 07

  Yeah, on average, 60,000.

• 37:55Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, 60,000 high fives we gave out.

• 37:57Declan Donnelly?

  We were there till every single person had crossed the start line. I swear.

• 37:59Speaker 07

  That's gotta be a world record. Yeah, I was gonna say. 60,000 high fives.

• 38:02Declan Donnelly?

  We need to call Willy Nilly.

• 38:03Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, get Willy Nilly in.

• 38:05Declan Donnelly?

  From Guinness World Records. One here that says, "Howdy, fellas." Yee-haw! "Over the last few weeks, we've seen Ant become very passionate over the so-called betrayal of Deck's secret life of photo shoots and meetups with holiday besties." Yes. "All fully understandable. As you expect, after 30 years of friendship, you must know everything about each other." Mm-hmm. "That is why I'm sure Deck knows fully about Ant's little side business." What? What? What? What? What?

• 38:36Declan Donnelly?

  "While out and about this weekend, I came across a platter of brownies." Only to see- What are you talking about? "Only to see an animated Ant staring back at me." He's trying to hide under- (laughing) Trying to hide under another alias, but as you can see, it's him. Not sure why he has the cone when selling brownies. What is the Mr. Whippy guy? He's selling ice creams. Up on the screen here is a cartoon character, looks suspiciously like Ant, holding an ice cream cone with a flake hanging out of it. Mr. Whippy, and giving us a big thumbs up with a pink bow tie. Oh, my God, that's brilliant. That looks like me, doesn't it? Respect, guys. That's from Lord James of High Wycombe.

• 39:21Declan Donnelly?

  Lord James? Lord James. My lord. Of High Wycombe. Good lord. So, do you think, because I think that Mr. Whippy logo's been off for a while. I do, too. Have you been time travelling back to- Yeah, I've been time travelling selling ice creams. The 1960s and selling- And brownies. It sounds. Selling a business in the 1940s, 50s, 60s, 50s? You're going to keep saying ducking, and then we're going to choose the right one. Until you say yes. Beating them all, mate. Complete them, mate. That's really good. I love that. I like it a lot. Any more of that? Keep it coming in. I'll see you dressed again. Hanging out at bellamark.com.

• 39:59Ant McPartlin?

  This next segment is an advert for Santander, who understand that getting started on a goal isn't easy and embracing messy beginnings is how progress happens.

• 40:08Declan Donnelly?

  Now, a couple of weeks ago, Ant, you answered some dilemmas.

• 40:11Ant McPartlin?

  Yes.

• 40:12Declan Donnelly?

  Put together by our team. Well, we've got some new dilemmas in from the guys that work at Santander.

• 40:19Ant McPartlin?

  Okay, okay, I'm up for that. Yeah, I'll do that.

• 40:21Declan Donnelly?

  For a bit of agony, Ant and Dare.

• 40:23Ant McPartlin?

  Okay, yes, let's do it. I'll try my very best.

• 40:27Declan Donnelly?

  I've got one here from Laura. Dear agony Ant and Dare.

• 40:30Ant McPartlin?

  And Dare.

• 40:31Declan Donnelly?

  I feel like I've started a lot of craft-related hobbies but struggle to see anything through. I've tried dressmaking, line or cuts, stained glass making, painting. I buy all the kit then lose interest when it comes to actually making more than three or four things. Do I just need to pick one thing and stick at it?

• 40:49Ant McPartlin?

  Nah.

• 40:51Ant McPartlin?

  Nah.

• 40:52Declan Donnelly?

  Is that what you would describe as a hyper fixation?

• 40:54Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, yeah, that is exactly what I'd describe as a hyper fixation. Also, though, if you genuinely love it and have a passion for it, you will stick with it.

• 41:03Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 41:03Ant McPartlin?

  She clearly hasn't found what she loves. When I first got sober, I don't even think I told you this, I thought, I need to do something, I need to fill me time, exactly like she has, I need to fill me time. I know, I'm gonna start whittling. So I bought-

• 41:18Declan Donnelly?

  You have not told me this.

• 41:19Ant McPartlin?

  So I bought a lot of whittling tools. You know what whittling is? When you get like a block of wood and you, yeah, you whittle it down. No, that's whistling.

• 41:26Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, sorry.

• 41:28Ant McPartlin?

  You have like utensils, carpentry utensils, and then you can kind of-

• 41:32Declan Donnelly?

  Whittle wood?

• 41:33Ant McPartlin?

  Whittle bits of wood into like, I don't know, whatever you want them to be welded into.

• 41:36Declan Donnelly?

  Like a tiny totem pole.

• 41:38Ant McPartlin?

  Oh my God, it's so hard. Whittling is so hard. It's not like how I thought it would be. I thought it would just be me, out in nature, whittling away. There's a lot of expletives. Maybe, maybe if I whittled now, I'd enjoy it, but nah. So I sacked that off.

• 41:53Declan Donnelly?

  Do you think Laura needs to maybe try a new hobby before buying all the kit for each one?

• 42:00Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, yeah, I'd say that. It's a very expensive way to do it, isn't it?

• 42:03Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 42:04Ant McPartlin?

  You know, like borrow some stuff off one of your friends. Have you tried golf? Golf's very good. Golf's a good thing to do.

• 42:11Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, she's saying they're craft-related hobbies.

• 42:13Ant McPartlin?

  Hmm, yeah, you're right. Well, clearly she's not that into craft.

• 42:17Declan Donnelly?

  No.

• 42:18Ant McPartlin?

  She's tried most of them then, she doesn't like them. That's what I'm saying. Try golf. It's bloody brilliant. Isn't it though?

• 42:25Declan Donnelly?

  It is good. But don't.

• 42:26Ant McPartlin?

  Thumbs up for golf, it gets you out in the open. You see beautiful nature, it smells good, it looks good.

• 42:33Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 42:34Ant McPartlin?

  There's a little bit of competition, you get to play with friends.

• 42:36Declan Donnelly?

  Good exercise.

• 42:37Ant McPartlin?

  Good exercise. And there's not a bad thing I would say about golf. So.

• 42:41Declan Donnelly?

  Oh.

• 42:42Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, I know you love crafty stuff, but my advice is try golf.

• 42:46Declan Donnelly?

  If in doubt.

• 42:47Ant McPartlin?

  Try golf.

• 42:48Declan Donnelly?

  Right, I've got another one here. Dear agony aunt and dad.

• 42:52Ant McPartlin?

  Yes.

• 42:53Declan Donnelly?

  I'm about to become a first time mum and honestly, I feel completely out of my depth.

• 42:58Ant McPartlin?

  Oh.

• 42:59Declan Donnelly?

  Everyone says you don't need much, but then you open social media or walk into a baby shop and suddenly it feels like you need everything. I've got lists coming at me from all directions, friends, family, influencers, and none of them match.

• 43:12Ant McPartlin?

  Right.

• 43:13Declan Donnelly?

  Some swear by buying everything brand new, others say second hand is the only sensible way. I'm going back and forwards between wanting everything perfect and feeling like I should just keep it simple. But I don't know what simple actually looks like in reality. Help from Leanne. Now, you have gone through this yourself.

• 43:30Ant McPartlin?

  I have, yes.

• 43:31Declan Donnelly?

  Personally.

• 43:32Ant McPartlin?

  Yes.

• 43:32Declan Donnelly?

  We both have.

• 43:32Ant McPartlin?

  She should have wrote this letter to my wife, really. That's who can really give you the perfect answer to this. Yeah, we both have. It is difficult and everyone will tell you different things. I don't think there's anything wrong with getting anything second hand.

• 43:45Declan Donnelly?

  No, not at all.

• 43:46Ant McPartlin?

  If, if that's the, because the thing is they grow so quickly.

• 43:49Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 43:49Ant McPartlin?

  So you never keep a hold of it. We had new stuff and stuff that people bought for us and we've passed it all on now.

• 43:55Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 43:55Ant McPartlin?

  And that's what you do, don't you?

• 43:56Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah. I don't think you should over worry.

• 43:58Ant McPartlin?

  No.

• 43:59Declan Donnelly?

  Don't overthink it.

• 44:00Ant McPartlin?

  And also get, get the essentials and then the stuff that you think you need, you'll get when you actually need them.

• 44:08Declan Donnelly?

  Hmm.

• 44:09Ant McPartlin?

  And then if you don't need them, you won't get them. Does that make sense?

• 44:12Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 44:12Ant McPartlin?

  Only, you know, there's certain things that you need. You need bottles for, for milk and stuff. But as the baby gets older, you think, oh, I might need that now.

• 44:19Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah, you don't need everything on day one.

• 44:21Ant McPartlin?

  Nah, no, you don't.

• 44:22Declan Donnelly?

  And also, Leanne. Enjoy it.

• 44:25Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 44:26Declan Donnelly?

  Those first early days with your new baby and you is just the most magical time.

• 44:32Ant McPartlin?

  It's brilliant. The rest of the world is just quietened, isn't it?

• 44:36Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 44:36Ant McPartlin?

  Like, the rest of the world is out there and this is your bubble.

• 44:39Declan Donnelly?

  Yeah.

• 44:40Ant McPartlin?

  And the day when you've got to kind of open back up to everybody else, you're a bit, it's a bit of a shame, actually. It is, because that is so special.

• 44:47Declan Donnelly?

  Your little family unit is the centre of the world for a very, very short time. So just enjoy it.

• 44:54Ant McPartlin?

  Love every second.

• 44:54Declan Donnelly?

  Drink it in. Just revel in the love. It's the best.

• 44:59Ant McPartlin?

  I do enjoy this. Is there any more?

• 45:00Declan Donnelly?

  No, there's not. You've solved everybody's problems. You've done it. Well done you.

• 45:04Ant McPartlin?

  Thank you. Well done you. Well done you. You did chip it in too.

• 45:07Declan Donnelly?

  And that's what Santander is all about. Understanding that beginnings don't have to be perfect and getting started is what's important.

• 45:14Ant McPartlin?

  Santander, it starts here.

• 45:18Declan Donnelly?

  And, and I think that's all we've got time for.

• 45:22Ant McPartlin?

  Okay, Dad, goodbye.

• 45:25Declan Donnelly?

  Thanks for all of your letters, your emails, everything you've sent us. Keep them coming in, hanging out at beltabox.com.

• 45:32Ant McPartlin?

  And remember, one last thing, if you want to swap something for Dex's air fryer.

• 45:36Declan Donnelly?

  Oh, yeah.

• 45:36Ant McPartlin?

  Get in touch.

• 45:37Declan Donnelly?

  Yes. Make it good, though.

• 45:39Ant McPartlin?

  Yeah, make it good.

• 45:39Declan Donnelly?

  One careful famous owner, remember?

• 45:41Ant McPartlin?

  Well-known guy.

• 45:42Declan Donnelly?

  That's all we've got time for this week. We'll be back on Monday with another bonus pod, but until then.

• 45:47Ant McPartlin?

  Bye, guys.

• 45:47Declan Donnelly?

  Respect, guys.

• 46:00Speaker 00

  Ugh, I hate Mondays.

• 46:02Speaker 01

  King's Hawaiian cinnamon swirl bite?

• 46:03Speaker 00

  Uh, Taylor Hansen? Sure, I'll try one.

• 46:06Speaker 01

  Mmm.

• 46:09Speaker 02

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• 46:11Speaker 00

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• 46:15Speaker 02

  Taylor Hansen? Nice.

• 46:17Speaker 01

  Try one.

• 46:19Speaker 03

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• 46:25Speaker 03

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• 46:30Speaker 04

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