Pretty Little Episode #49

Mae and Fortune answer a question from an entire family, plus a pretty little Pontius Pilate update for the ages! Do you fly in *your* dreams? Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterSubmit questions to speakpipe.com/handsomepod http://speakpipe.com/handsomepodFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.com http://handsomepod.com/Watch Handsome on YouTube http://youtube.com/@handsomepodThis is a Headgum https://headgum.com/ podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter https://x.com/headgum, Instagram https://www.instagram.com/headgum/, and Tiktok https://www.tiktok.com/@headgum. Advertise on Handsome https://gumball.fm/shows/handsome via Gumball.fm http://gumball.fm/. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  This is a HeadGum Podcast.

• 0:04Mae Martin?

  Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking whether I brought my sunglasses before driving west at the end of the day? A learning moment. I'm gaining confidence in my driving, but it helps when I'm not blinded by the sun beaming directly into my eyeballs.

• 0:18Tig Notaro?

  Yeah, checking first is handsome, so check Allstate first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.

• 0:35Mae Martin?

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• 0:53Fortune Feimster?

  With Squarespace's cutting-edge design tools, you can build a gorgeous online presence that perfectly fits your brand or business. Their SEO tools help your ideal audience find you. Since every dream needs a domain, Squarespace makes it easy to find the best name for your business at one fair, all-inclusive price. No hidden fees, no required add-ons. Squarespace offers countless extras like built-in donation tools for fundraising, and online payments and invoicing to help you get paid on time. Squarespace makes it easy, so easy, we even made a handsome website ourselves in less than 20 minutes.

• 1:25Mae Martin?

  So what are you waiting for? Get started on your dream website today. Head to Squarespace.com/handsome for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code HANSOME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

• 1:48Fortune Feimster?

  Pretty little episode. Welcome to the Handsome Pod. This is a pretty little episode with me and Fortune Feimster. That's right. And May and I are doing this episode in person. It's really nice. We've never done a pretty little episode in person. It's great to be on this comfy couch with you. You're looking very, very Mae Martin, very like, all black. Oh, yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Trying to be cool like you.

• 2:16Mae Martin?

  I've just been using my depuffer and, you know.

• 2:18Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, I used my depuffer today.

• 2:20Mae Martin?

  You did?

• 2:20Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 2:21Mae Martin?

  Okay.

• 2:21Fortune Feimster?

  Hopefully that helped.

• 2:22Mae Martin?

  It really does help, I think.

• 2:24Fortune Feimster?

  And I saw the pictures you had talked about in an episode, uh, wearing a tank on stage. Saw the pics, looked good, bud.

• 2:33Mae Martin?

  Thank you.

• 2:33Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 2:34Mae Martin?

  It's the new me, it's the summer me.

• 2:36Fortune Feimster?

  I can't believe you haven't done it before, you seem like a tank top wearing performer.

• 2:40Mae Martin?

  Thanks. Oh, I, it doesn't, for comedy, it seems weirdly like...

• 2:45Fortune Feimster?

  Too exposed?

• 2:46Mae Martin?

  Yeah, and too, like, you can't be, I don't know.

• 2:49Fortune Feimster?

  Not for music, though.

• 2:50Mae Martin?

  For comedy, but, you know, for music, people, I feel like people want a bit of, like, swagger.

• 2:54Fortune Feimster?

  And I saw a video, you looked cool up there, playing your guitar and singing.

• 2:58Mae Martin?

  I wish, I mean, I, I wish I had a show where we were in the same city and you could come on and we could do a duet.

• 3:04Fortune Feimster?

  I know, you were talking about us maybe doing something, and I think Tig was out of town and I didn't know my schedule. We'll figure it out.

• 3:11Mae Martin?

  To get us, the handsome band, a surprise?

• 3:14Fortune Feimster?

  The handsome band.

• 3:15Mae Martin?

  I mean, we could do ironic.

• 3:17Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, we could.

• 3:18Mae Martin?

  I could be Alanis.

• 3:19Fortune Feimster?

  You could?

• 3:21Mae Martin?

  That would be great.

• 3:22Fortune Feimster?

  That would be very cool.

• 3:24Mae Martin?

  What's been going on? It's a very hot day today.

• 3:26Fortune Feimster?

  It is. We're in the thick of summer in LA, which, you know, I always forget, though, LA's the hottest in August and September.

• 3:33Mae Martin?

  Oh, god, really?

• 3:35Fortune Feimster?

  So this is just a preview.

• 3:35Mae Martin?

  Oh, my god. I was playing, um, foosball today. I play for hours a day, and I...

• 3:40Fortune Feimster?

  By yourself?

• 3:41Mae Martin?

  No, that would be crazy, sprinting around in a circle.

• 3:45Fortune Feimster?

  Cause it's in your house?

• 3:47Mae Martin?

  It's out back, yeah, and so, and my friend Matt has moved into my back house.

• 3:51Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, really?

• 3:52Mae Martin?

  With his girlfriend for like, six months, so...

• 3:54Fortune Feimster?

  Are you liking this setup?

• 3:55Mae Martin?

  I like, I don't like to be alone with my thoughts too much, so it's good to have them, and they're like, separate, they got their own kitchen and... But he's an insane foosball player, like, just misspent youth, like, it's, and he loses his sense of humor when he plays, like, he gets totally serious. And we were playing in the hot sun and... I got so, I mean, I've beaten him twice and we've played maybe 6,000 games.

• 4:19Fortune Feimster?

  Whoa, he's very good, man.

• 4:21Mae Martin?

  He's so good in the stuff that I hear myself say to him out of rage, like, that I told him to burn in hell today.

• 4:27Fortune Feimster?

  Oh my god, are you just very competitive? Or is it just with him?

• 4:31Mae Martin?

  I am in general, but with him, there's something so infuriating about the fact that he's not smiling and he's just slamming that ball in goal after goal. Thomas has seen him play, it's like, it's some-

• 4:41Speaker 04

  He's good, he beat me like three times in a row, yeah.

• 4:43Mae Martin?

  Yeah, it's-

• 4:44Speaker 04

  And I had a foosball table when I was a kid, so I consider myself like a decent player.

• 4:49Mae Martin?

  I bet playing anyone else, you'd be crushing them, yeah, that's how I feel, I'm getting really good from playing him and-

• 4:53Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 4:54Mae Martin?

  But, he's unstoppable. He's like passing-

• 4:58Fortune Feimster?

  He's unstoppable.

• 4:58Mae Martin?

  What's that?

• 4:59Fortune Feimster?

  It's a song. But it's "I'm unstoppable."

• 5:02Mae Martin?

  Yeah, he is, he's unstoppable.

• 5:05Fortune Feimster?

  Well, I'm glad you have that to entertain yourself with.

• 5:08Mae Martin?

  Yeah, I'm getting-

• 5:08Fortune Feimster?

  You created quite a pad between this table and your sauna.

• 5:13Mae Martin?

  It's-

• 5:13Fortune Feimster?

  I mean, I think you're living the life.

• 5:16Mae Martin?

  Do you think?

• 5:16Fortune Feimster?

  It feels like it.

• 5:18Mae Martin?

  I feel like it's reflective of like, uh, yeah, kind of, a kind of bachelor mindset, but I've always been like that, I want games and-

• 5:28Fortune Feimster?

  I have a, a multi-kate arcade game that's like my most prized possession.

• 5:34Mae Martin?

  Do you play?

• 5:34Fortune Feimster?

  Uh, yeah, it's just pretty loud, cause you know it's old school.

• 5:38Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 5:38Fortune Feimster?

  But it's, you just turn it on and play all these games, Pac-Man, Galaga, uh, or is that what it's called?

• 5:45Mae Martin?

  Uh, where you shoot the airplanes?

• 5:47Fortune Feimster?

  Why is my mind totally blank?

• 5:48Mae Martin?

  Yeah, same.

• 5:49Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, the airplanes that go-

• 5:50Mae Martin?

  What is that game?

• 5:51Speaker 04

  Galaga, yeah.

• 5:52Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, Galaga, okay. And the Donkey Kong, and then like, Mr. Pac-Man, all these things, it's great, Ms. Pac-Man.

• 5:59Mae Martin?

  Did you ever see the documentary King of Kong?

• 6:03Fortune Feimster?

  I did not.

• 6:04Mae Martin?

  It's like Christopher Guest made it, it, like, it could be scripted, it's so amazing, it's about people who are obsessed with Donkey Kong and they're trying to beat the record and there, there's like- A villain, there's a hero, there's, and, and their lives are falling apart because of this game. Like, they are obsessed. There's a cheat scandal. Like, you gotta watch King of Kong.

• 6:24Fortune Feimster?

  Okay, good to know.

• 6:26Mae Martin?

  They all have sort of mullets and, yeah, it's.

• 6:28Speaker 04

  You would love it, Fortune.

• 6:29Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 6:29Fortune Feimster?

  Alright, I'll check it out.

• 6:30Mae Martin?

  Yeah. What have you been do- you've been racing around and foobar's out?

• 6:34Fortune Feimster?

  Foobar's out, which is great. I've just been so- my whole month of June was insane.

• 6:40Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 6:40Fortune Feimster?

  Uh, July's better.

• 6:43Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 6:43Fortune Feimster?

  So, um.

• 6:44Mae Martin?

  But better for you is still insane for most.

• 6:47Fortune Feimster?

  I, I'm pretty busy, but I will s- I think I, um, I think time management, I'm good at.

• 6:55Mae Martin?

  Yeah, you are. You don't have an assistant, which blows my mind.

• 6:58Fortune Feimster?

  I think I've somehow just figured out a way to like slot things in, and, you know?

• 7:04Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 7:04Fortune Feimster?

  Uh, it just requires like, uh, some real attention to the calendar and

• 7:12Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 7:12Fortune Feimster?

  to details and I figure it out.

• 7:14Mae Martin?

  Do you have a physical calendar?

• 7:16Fortune Feimster?

  No, it's all on my Google Calendar.

• 7:18Mae Martin?

  See, I, I need it visually. Like, yeah, I got like an old school, yeah.

• 7:23Fortune Feimster?

  But I, you know, I work really hard and schedule the crap out of myself.

• 7:30Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 7:30Fortune Feimster?

  But then I will make time for the things I need to make time for.

• 7:34Mae Martin?

  Yeah, same.

• 7:35Fortune Feimster?

  And I will stand firm on that, uh.

• 7:38Mae Martin?

  Same.

• 7:38Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 7:39Mae Martin?

  When I got back from tour, I was like, I have to, and I'm, I'm still, I'm doing ADR and stuff and it's, but I was like, I have to get a massage. And I went to the Korean spa. I had a facial.

• 7:49Fortune Feimster?

  Uh huh.

• 7:50Mae Martin?

  Never have facials. It was eighty-five minutes.

• 7:53Fortune Feimster?

  Uh, the facial was?

• 7:54Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 7:55Fortune Feimster?

  That's a long facial.

• 7:56Mae Martin?

  And right before I went in, my friend said, "Hope you don't get claustrophobic." And as soon as she said that, I was like, "Oh my god, I'm trapped." And then I did get claustrophobic. Yeah, and she was like poking me, popping me.

• 8:07Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, and I think an hour facial's good.

• 8:10Mae Martin?

  I think that's good.

• 8:11Fortune Feimster?

  But I like, I would, I don't mind an eighty-minute massage.

• 8:13Mae Martin?

  Give me a hundred and twenty minutes.

• 8:15Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 8:15Mae Martin?

  Walk on me.

• 8:16Fortune Feimster?

  Oh yeah, I like that too, the Thai massage.

• 8:19Mae Martin?

  It's so good. Do they crack you?

• 8:21Fortune Feimster?

  I don't like the cracking.

• 8:22Mae Martin?

  Okay, I love it.

• 8:23Fortune Feimster?

  But I don't mind the walking.

• 8:25Mae Martin?

  I'd just like to be walked on.

• 8:28Fortune Feimster?

  I love a massage. It's one of my favorite things.

• 8:31Mae Martin?

  I know we've talked about it on the pod, but that I'm a registered Shiatsu masseuse.

• 8:35Fortune Feimster?

  That's right.

• 8:36Mae Martin?

  Yeah, I just like to remind you.

• 8:38Fortune Feimster?

  You don't do anything with it, but you are.

• 8:40Mae Martin?

  Well, you don't know what I do.

• 8:43Fortune Feimster?

  True. I don't know what happens behind closed doors in your, on your dates or whatever.

• 8:48Mae Martin?

  That I'm moonlighting in a Thai massage place. Yeah, I just booked an Airbnb in August for a couple of weeks in Lake Arrowhead.

• 8:58Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, that'll be nice.

• 8:59Mae Martin?

  To like try to chill out, but I'm already inviting too many people.

• 9:02Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, you got a bunch of people coming?

• 9:04Mae Martin?

  I'm inviting some fun randoms who, not, not randoms, but like people I haven't seen in years or haven't, haven't reconnected with. Like I invited these two girls I went to middle school with who are still friends and it'll be really fun and we, we're gonna play all these games that are to do with like the people we went to school with, like remember all the names of everyone in our class and all our teachers that, you know, I can't let go of any thing. I'm, I'm so nostalgia driven.

• 9:30Fortune Feimster?

  Well, that's all right.

• 9:31Mae Martin?

  Yeah, that'll be good.

• 9:32Fortune Feimster?

  You'll have a good time.

• 9:33Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 9:34Fortune Feimster?

  Well, should we get to some questions?

• 9:36Mae Martin?

  Yeah, we should.

• 9:37Fortune Feimster?

  All right, let's do it.

• 9:38Speaker 05

  Hi, we're calling from Oakland, California. I'm Alice and this is my cousin. I'm Chelsea and this is my mom. I'm Debbie.

• 9:48Speaker 06

  And we have a question for you.

• 9:52Speaker 05

  When you're dreaming about flying, do you flap your arms like wings or soar like a super person?

• 10:02Fortune Feimster?

  Huh. Wow. Do you dream about flying?

• 10:05Mae Martin?

  Constantly.

• 10:06Fortune Feimster?

  You do have dreams?

• 10:07Mae Martin?

  Yes, you don't.

• 10:08Fortune Feimster?

  I do not, no.

• 10:09Mae Martin?

  Never had a flying dream?

• 10:10Fortune Feimster?

  I don't think so. Not that, not that I recall. I don't remember a lot of my dreams. I don't know what that means.

• 10:15Mae Martin?

  Yeah, we should Google what that means. No flying dreams versus flying dreams. But also, yeah, maybe you're just not a big dreamer. I have to do like the breaststroke. So I have to get up usually by jumping and each time I jump, gravity gets less.

• 10:28Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 10:28Mae Martin?

  And then once I'm up, I'm doing this breaststroke to kind of stay in place. And usually the context is some kind of schoolyard bullies and I'm going.

• 10:38Mae Martin?

  Think you can do this? And then, and they're like, bullshit, you can't fly. And I'm like, watch me. And then usually I do that.

• 10:45Fortune Feimster?

  Hilarious.

• 10:45Mae Martin?

  And then there's another version where the only way I can fly is to step off a giant building.

• 10:51Fortune Feimster?

  Oh.

• 10:51Mae Martin?

  Take the risk.

• 10:52Fortune Feimster?

  That's scary.

• 10:53Mae Martin?

  It's so scary. And it's just like.

• 10:55Fortune Feimster?

  Are you flapping your wings or are you soaring?

• 10:57Mae Martin?

  It's still.

• 10:58Fortune Feimster?

  It's still the thing.

• 10:58Mae Martin?

  This movement.

• 10:59Fortune Feimster?

  It's kind of like treading water, yeah.

• 11:01Mae Martin?

  It's very treading, yeah, yeah. I think that's what flying would be like probably, right? Breaststroke, you're not, you're gonna have to still propel yourself, surely.

• 11:09Fortune Feimster?

  The flapping of the arms feels like you're panicked. The soaring feels like you've given into it.

• 11:17Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 11:17Fortune Feimster?

  I wonder if there's something psychological about that.

• 11:20Mae Martin?

  Yeah. If you can get high enough and let the wind just take you.

• 11:23Fortune Feimster?

  If I were to, if I were to guess in my dream, I think I would be soaring, because I'm in the dream. Hopefully I'm safe.

• 11:32Mae Martin?

  Yeah. Would you ever go hand gliding?

• 11:35Fortune Feimster?

  No.

• 11:36Mae Martin?

  Me neither.

• 11:36Fortune Feimster?

  I am not an adventure person. I just.

• 11:39Mae Martin?

  I don't think I am either. I like an escape room.

• 11:42Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah. Some people say like as they've gotten older, or they've had kids or whatever, that they are less risk-taking, you know? But I've never been, I'm a risk-taker in life as far as like moving to LA with like 50 bucks in my pocket. And you know, like, that's a risk.

• 11:58Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 11:58Fortune Feimster?

  But as far as like adventure risks, that's not my thing.

• 12:02Mae Martin?

  Life's scary already.

• 12:03Fortune Feimster?

  I don't want to jump out of a plane. I don't want to bungee jump. I don't want to hang glide.

• 12:09Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 12:10Fortune Feimster?

  Nothing.

• 12:11Mae Martin?

  So you're not gonna be the new Ethan Hunt in Mission Impossible?

• 12:15Fortune Feimster?

  No.

• 12:15Mae Martin?

  Did you see it?

• 12:16Fortune Feimster?

  Uh-uh.

• 12:17Mae Martin?

  This plane sequence, Thomas?

• 12:19Speaker 04

  It's amazing.

• 12:20Fortune Feimster?

  Really?

• 12:20Mae Martin?

  The movie, bit of a mess.

• 12:22Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 12:23Fortune Feimster?

  Oh.

• 12:23Mae Martin?

  Sorry if that alienates people. But that sequence is one of the craziest things I've ever seen. He's, he's fighting a guy and as he's climbing all over this plane, as it flies, and he's really doing it.

• 12:34Fortune Feimster?

  Tom Cruise?

• 12:34Mae Martin?

  Yeah, he's doing it. He does it all. And he's punching the guy and he's trying to get, and he's on the wing and he's hanging, and his face, it's absolutely crazy. Yeah, it's, I was cheering in the.

• 12:46Fortune Feimster?

  He loves to do his own stunts.

• 12:47Mae Martin?

  He loves it.

• 12:49Fortune Feimster?

  Well, I mean, he is an adventure guy for sure. He has done a lot on planes.

• 12:54Mae Martin?

  Do you think he dreams?

• 12:56Fortune Feimster?

  I don't know.

• 12:57Mae Martin?

  Does Tom Cruise Dream is a good title for a sort of zine?

• 13:01Fortune Feimster?

  Eyes wide shut.

• 13:01Mae Martin?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 13:04Speaker 04

  I did Google, what does it mean to not dream about flying? And it said, one of the reasons is you might have moved on from the adventurous part of your life. So it kind of lines up with what you're saying, Fortune.

• 13:15Mae Martin?

  Oh, wow.

• 13:15Fortune Feimster?

  I'm a practical gal.

• 13:17Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 13:17Fortune Feimster?

  You know, I, I, I have, I feel deeply, I have, you know, the heart stuff for sure. I don't shy from that, but like, in other areas of life, I'm practical.

• 13:30Mae Martin?

  But also, like, your job is scary. Like, you don't, you know what I mean? It's not like you're bored.

• 13:36Fortune Feimster?

  Right, like I'm taking no risk.

• 13:37Mae Martin?

  And you want to get some adrenaline, like, you cut those adrenaline peaks.

• 13:41Fortune Feimster?

  I think about that all the time, just like, being on stage in front of 3,000 people and it's just you and a mic.

• 13:48Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 13:49Fortune Feimster?

  And to like, have to command the attention of those 3,000 people for an hour, it, it isn't easy. I mean, listen, it's not rocket science, but it's not easy.

• 14:00Mae Martin?

  Yeah, and making it look easy is the...

• 14:03Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, making it look like you're coming up with everything on the spot, that's the thing, but, you know, if you were to tell somebody, go do that, they'd probably be terrified.

• 14:13Mae Martin?

  Like every customs official that I come over the border, they go, yeah, I was gonna do that, or yeah, I was thinking about it. I think I might do comedy.

• 14:22Fortune Feimster?

  Public speaking is like one of people's biggest fears over death.

• 14:26Mae Martin?

  That's that Seinfeld bit, right? That, yeah, it's, that's insane.

• 14:34Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, they fear it more than death, so I don't know that they would like doing an hour of stand-up in front of all those people.

• 14:41Mae Martin?

  I, there's so many things I find more scary than stand-up, but I don't know.

• 14:46Fortune Feimster?

  That, well, that's because you do stand-up, so.

• 14:48Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 14:48Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 14:49Mae Martin?

  But should we hear this amazing trio?

• 14:51Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, I love this trio, this family of...

• 14:53Mae Martin?

  Intergenerational.

• 14:54Fortune Feimster?

  Lovely, lovely ladies.

• 14:56Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 14:57Fortune Feimster?

  My answer, this is Alice, is when I'm flying, I flap my arms like wings and I'm very good at it.

• 15:06Speaker 06

  This is Chelsea. I start in a squat and jump into the sky with my arms by my sides, leaving, leading with my forehead. And this is Debbie, and I jump up and start to soar, only staying about six feet off the ground because I'm really scared of heights. And then I go into a breaststroke motion. Fortune Marie, don't even go there.

• 15:29Fortune Feimster?

  Oh.

• 15:34Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, that's adorable.

• 15:37Mae Martin?

  So I'm, I'm with Debbie because I'm usually, I'm usually not that high up.

• 15:40Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 15:41Mae Martin?

  I'm, yeah, and I'm breast.

• 15:42Fortune Feimster?

  And you're breast choking. They scolded me and I didn't even say anything dirty.

• 15:46Mae Martin?

  They beat you to it.

• 15:49Fortune Feimster?

  I didn't even said the word cooter or anything.

• 15:51Mae Martin?

  Fortune.

• 15:54Fortune Feimster?

  Well, that was a treat. I love that one.

• 15:56Mae Martin?

  That was great. Should we hear another one?

• 15:58Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 15:59Speaker 07

  Hi, this is Lucy. Excited to send you a question. Uh, so a few episodes ago, you guys were talking about the pronunciation of, uh, the Pontius Pilate. And I just wanted to come to May's defense, uh, for a moment. I was classics major. And so Pontius Pilate is the governor of the Roman province of Judea. Um, and so in Latin, it would have been pronounced Pontius Pilate. Um, T's were hard. And so there are other funny, like, pronunciation facts, like Julius Caesar would have been Julius Caesar. Cicero would have been Cicero. Mark Antony was Marcus Antonius. Anyway, fun things like that. That leads me into my question. Is there a topic that you could talk forever about regardless of anyone else's interest, um, in that?

• 16:43Mae Martin?

  First of all, Cicero would have been Cicero? That's huge.

• 16:46Fortune Feimster?

  I mean, but like, is anyone really saying it like this?

• 16:50Mae Martin?

  Is anyone, or and also who's talking about Cicero?

• 16:52Fortune Feimster?

  Come on.

• 16:53Mae Martin?

  That much. Wow. But thank you for vindicating me. Pontius Pilate.

• 16:57Fortune Feimster?

  Pontius, Pontius Pilate.

• 17:00Mae Martin?

  Um, yeah, what do you, what are your special interests that you could get on a rant about?

• 17:05Fortune Feimster?

  I mean, I, already on the radio show I do with Tom Papa, we talk about food all the time.

• 17:10Mae Martin?

  Yes.

• 17:11Fortune Feimster?

  Food is like, uh, my, my love language, my life. I love it way too much. I think about it way too much. So any topic of food I could probably stay on for a while, especially snacks or apps.

• 17:22Mae Martin?

  You would have been real fun on, on the. In the tour van, we did about two and a half hours about favorite apps.

• 17:29Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 17:29Mae Martin?

  Favorite appetizers.

• 17:30Fortune Feimster?

  I would have been right in there. I have a lot of knowledge unfortunately about it.

• 17:33Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 17:35Fortune Feimster?

  I feel like you have a lot of topics you could go on for a while about.

• 17:39Mae Martin?

  Yeah, I'm remembering times where I've kind of come out of a daze and realized all my friends look bored. And that they're like turning around. The main ones I'm thinking of are Survivor. I could truly talk about the beauty of the game of Survivor. The nuances of the gameplay.

• 17:56Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 17:56Mae Martin?

  The evolution of the show as the series have gone on. Things that I want them to change in the format. Like I could really.

• 18:04Fortune Feimster?

  You probably have some good notes for them.

• 18:06Mae Martin?

  I have many notes.

• 18:08Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 18:08Mae Martin?

  Yeah, but huge respect as well.

• 18:10Fortune Feimster?

  Right.

• 18:11Mae Martin?

  And then the other one is Napoleon. Like I think I'm, I went through a phase in the pandemic of getting really into, I mean, not into, he's such a complex figure, but like I got really into him.

• 18:23Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 18:24Mae Martin?

  He's, and it's just, there's so much rich kind of detail in his strange ascension to power and then like, like he was gonna be a romantic novelist. He was, he, he wrote this romantic novel. It sold at Sotheby's like fifteen years ago and for not that much money.

• 18:44Fortune Feimster?

  Huh.

• 18:44Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 18:44Fortune Feimster?

  Trying to think if there's anything I have a lot of knowledge of. I know like a little bit of things of a lot of things.

• 18:50Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 18:51Fortune Feimster?

  I weirdly know a lot of religious stuff.

• 18:54Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 18:55Fortune Feimster?

  Uh, just growing up in the South.

• 18:57Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 18:58Fortune Feimster?

  Uh, having gone to church every Sunday. And then I studied religion a little bit.

• 19:04Mae Martin?

  Yeah. You know your Bible stories.

• 19:06Fortune Feimster?

  And I'm a Bible stories.

• 19:08Mae Martin?

  You know your hymns.

• 19:09Fortune Feimster?

  I've studied Old Testament in college. Uh, I studied ancient Egypt in college as well for fun, but a lot of that knowledge I don't remember now.

• 19:17Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 19:18Fortune Feimster?

  But I remember loving it at the time.

• 19:20Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 19:20Fortune Feimster?

  Uh, but I, yeah, I was a big history buff that I've sort of gotten away from that in my older age. But yeah, in college, I was taking all these history things for no reason.

• 19:30Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 19:31Fortune Feimster?

  Just like, I wanna learn about Egypt, ancient Egypt, and I wanna learn about Old Testament and...

• 19:36Mae Martin?

  I, I think we're so stressed as, like, adults are so stressed.

• 19:41Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 19:41Mae Martin?

  That really, we do, like, when you have time off, you just wanna numb yourself and switch off.

• 19:48Fortune Feimster?

  I mean, that's my problem now, I think, because I, uh, doing stand-up and I, I, like you, like, we develop a lot of things.

• 19:57Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 19:58Fortune Feimster?

  You're always writing.

• 19:59Mae Martin?

  Always.

• 19:59Fortune Feimster?

  And it just feels like homework constantly, like, and so I think when I'm not having to do that stuff, I don't wanna think about anything. But it's kind of keeping me from learning those, about those other, like, academic type things that I used to love to learn about.

• 20:14Mae Martin?

  And that all feed your stand-up too, like, they, all those things, like, they, yeah, I just, I've read, well, I think it was because I read that Harvard is doing online courses about the Constitution and stuff, kind of as a response to

• 20:27Fortune Feimster?

  Oh, really?

• 20:28Mae Martin?

  Trump, like, cracking down on that.

• 20:29Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 20:30Mae Martin?

  So then I went on their website, and then I found all these online colleges where you can, some are free, some are, like, pretty cheap, and there's, like, weekly lectures online, and then you don't have to do homework, and it, and you, yeah, I think I might do that, like, an hour a week on, like, mythology or art.

• 20:47Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 20:47Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 20:48Fortune Feimster?

  Listen to TED Talks, I guess.

• 20:50Mae Martin?

  I love a TED Talk.

• 20:51Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 20:51Mae Martin?

  Yeah, I would do a TED Talk on Survivor or on, um...

• 20:54Fortune Feimster?

  You should do a TED Talk on Survivor.

• 20:56Mae Martin?

  I can't now.

• 21:00Mae Martin?

  I no longer can, but I have.

• 21:03Fortune Feimster?

  I don't know, I still think you can.

• 21:06Mae Martin?

  If I was gonna do a TED Talk, it might be on the troubled teen industry or something, or, because I had to learn so much about that for the show and writing the show that's coming out in the fall, like, about the history of... Where those programs came from, cults in the seventies? It's super interesting.

• 21:21Fortune Feimster?

  Cults in the seventies is interesting. I like those documentaries that pop up about that wild shit.

• 21:28Mae Martin?

  Yeah.

• 21:29Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 21:29Mae Martin?

  MKUltra.

• 21:30Fortune Feimster?

  And just like those personalities that can get people to follow them. Like what the study of like that type of person.

• 21:37Mae Martin?

  Totally.

• 21:38Fortune Feimster?

  Is interesting. This is like a giant narcissist.

• 21:41Mae Martin?

  Cults are endlessly fascinating. Yeah, total narcissism. Yeah, let's hear Lucy's answer.

• 21:48Speaker 07

  Okay, my answer, yes, classics is one of them. The other for me is the story of human evolution. I love thinking and reading about the story of, you know, how humans evolved and then other questions that that brings up. Like, what makes us truly human? Did the onset of agriculture spell the downfall for the welfare of the human race? You know, lots of good questions like that. Thanks for answering.

• 22:13Fortune Feimster?

  All right.

• 22:14Mae Martin?

  That's so juicy. And I love a book that is like bite sized kind of history of the universe and the world. And, and yeah, the acceleration of like, you know, the time from the invention of whatever to the invention of the atomic bomb is so short. Like, we're just exponentially, we're moving so fast. Oh, man. Okay, I gotta, I gotta talk to Lucy.

• 22:40Fortune Feimster?

  Lucy, you speak May's language.

• 22:42Mae Martin?

  Yeah, that's juicy. Thank you. Juicy Lucy. Wish I hadn't said that.

• 22:46Fortune Feimster?

  Lucy!

• 22:46Mae Martin?

  I wish I hadn't said that. Sorry.

• 22:49Fortune Feimster?

  Well, what a treat. This was fun to do, uh, one of these in person.

• 22:53Mae Martin?

  It was a real pleasure.

• 22:54Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah.

• 22:55Mae Martin?

  What a treat. And there's this nice like smiley face behind you. Oh, sorry.

• 22:59Fortune Feimster?

  I'm going for the connection. Smiley face. Oh, right there. Yeah.

• 23:03Mae Martin?

  Yeah, and it really matches.

• 23:04Fortune Feimster?

  Here at HeadGum, this is where we're, we're stationed at the moment. Yeah, on these couches.

• 23:11Mae Martin?

  Keep, keep sending your questions, please.

• 23:13Fortune Feimster?

  Yeah, at speakpipe.com/hansampod.

• 23:16Mae Martin?

  Yeah, do it.

• 23:17Fortune Feimster?

  That's right. Do it. Well, uh, this was lovely.

• 23:22Mae Martin?

  I guess I'd like to remind you to keep it.

• 23:24Fortune Feimster?

  Pretty handsome.

• 23:27Mae Martin?

  Handsome is hosted by me, Mae Martin, Tig Notaro, and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Willett. Email us at [email protected] and please follow us on social media at HandsomePod.

• 23:43Speaker 00

  What a podcast!

• 23:45Speaker 04

  What a podcast!

• 23:49Speaker 00

  That was a HeadGum Podcast.