2025 Ep 319 - A Late & Extra Long Episode

Everyone thought this was a peter-out, but no - the Burg Boys are back! The boys release the unredacted details of the heist from deep inside the Burg Bunker. And with this being the second-last episode of the year, a few loose ends are tied up - including one that’s spanned well over a decade. The boys thought this day would NEVER come! 1. Plans from the Burg Bunker 2. Loose ends and Hamish’s Uganda story 3. Dimmies and Tinnies health stars 4. The People’s Bitcoin

• 0:02Speaker 00

  A Listener Production.

• 0:07Speaker 01

  Activate your internet because the Hamish and Andy podcast starts in three, two.

• 0:17Speaker 01

  Sorry, it's still buffering. One.

• 0:23Speaker 02

  Ahoy to mother, Hamish.

• 0:26Speaker 03

  I hope we're energy drinks.

• 0:31Speaker 03

  But we could also be well-known people in the family.

• 0:36Speaker 02

  Ahoy to Whistler, Jack. Oh, are we mountains in Canada? No.

• 0:42Speaker 03

  Are we things from a painting?

• 0:44Speaker 02

  And I'm Marty. Mother, Marty, Whistler.

• 0:47Speaker 03

  Marty, that's good. It's good to get one that stumps us.

• 0:50Speaker 02

  We are the three main characters from Sneakers, the film of which we.

• 0:55Speaker 03

  Yes, yes. Mother, don't remember mother. Whistler, I do.

• 0:59Speaker 02

  You are the technician and played by Dan Aykroyd-Ham.

• 1:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:03Speaker 02

  Darren, mother, Roscoe. Jack Whistler is the blind phone freaker. He's the phone technician.

• 1:09Speaker 03

  He has a Braille keypad that people would still remember from that film that just kind of like, it's like a ticker tape.

• 1:15Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 1:15Speaker 03

  He puts his fingers on and reads it. Yep.

• 1:16Speaker 02

  And I'm Marty, Robert Redford, head of the operation.

• 1:21Speaker 02

  The reason why we're doing this.

• 1:22Speaker 03

  That brings us perfectly to the reason why a few people might be saying right now, hang on, isn't this episode late? You normally upload it at midnight. What the heck is going on? If everything has worked, this episode is being uploaded 10am. Which is some 10 hours later than we normally upload it. And there'll be, there'll be, there will be anger. There'll probably be confusion from a lot of people. But if it's worked, it's that right now, it's if you're listening to it as fast as you could, it's 10:01 on the 27th of November because by our calculations, and everyone thought this could be a Peter app, but by our calculations, earlier on the morning of the 27th, which again is in the future for us now, but will be the day you listen to this if it's live.

• 2:07Speaker 03

  We should have successfully, or otherwise, completed Burg Boys. Our mission, our mission to rob a business who nominated themselves and asked us to come and rob the business to test out their security.

• 2:34Speaker 02

  So exciting. It's happening now. We don't know how it's gone. We assume it's a great success, but people will be wondering, A, who do we put the hit on?

• 2:43Speaker 03

  Who did we rob? Now, the reason we delayed the start of this, we probably didn't need to, but the reason we delayed the uploading of today's episode was because like, if we uploaded this at midnight Thursday morning and someone from the workplace, and we're all like, we're gonna do it, we're gonna do it, because next week's episode will be the full recount of Burg Boys.

• 3:00Speaker 02

  And it's quite a large company.

• 3:01Speaker 03

  It's quite a large company. There'll be a lot to talk about. So next Thursday's app is the last one for the year, and that's going to be the complete rundown of how the operation's gone. But if we, I think people understand, if we put, if we uploaded normally at like 12:01 in the morning at midnight, then what's, what if there's someone from the company's listening going, hang on a sec, that's our company. And they would hear it before we actually committed the heist. So we had to delay it to give ourselves the window of crime.

• 3:28Speaker 02

  Let's go back to when we were talking about the jobs a while back, because we did go quiet on Burg Boys. And it all started with Hame presenting a job. We had, you may have heard a bit of this before, because we heavily redacted it because we didn't want to give away key aspects. Here is the unredacted version of that.

• 3:46Speaker 03

  What about this from Rob? I'd like you guys to security test my accounting firm. So straight away like, oh, what's this, files and stuff? No. Because I think if you can steal a painting off the staircase, it'd be amazing, especially given only one person can fit in the staircase at one time. That's fine. Then he says, if it's too difficult, try this, but I actually think we should do both. He goes, if not, steal the company's Suzuki.

• 4:14Speaker 03

  That'd be hilarious, seeing you guys try and find the keys and try to steal the car from the staff parking area. This is from Mildura in Victoria, goes, "Everyone expects you to do security tests in the big cities, but come to a regional town where we won't expect it. And driving away in a car with the painting is an amazing finale."

• 4:30Speaker 02

  I like that. Grand theft auto and an art heist.

• 4:33Speaker 03

  An art heist and a Suzuki heist.

• 4:36Speaker 02

  I like that.

• 4:37Speaker 03

  There's so much we need to know. We need to know what the paintings are. Are they alarmed heading into the stairwell? How do you get out of the stairwell? Why are you here? Where are the keys to the Suzuki?

• 4:47Speaker 02

  He's the only, I don't want to tell yucky or yum here, but the only thing for me is that it's a long way for us to go for the reconnaissance part of it. Like, the recon would be like, the night before, we stay one night in a motel then rob the place.

• 5:01Speaker 03

  Well, that, I don't like that, because we give you twelve hours to formulate a plan. We're going number one.

• 5:10Speaker 02

  You didn't see George Clooney and Brad Pitt go, "We're doing it tomorrow." And they're like, "Well, that doesn't give us time to plan." It's like, "Well, it's expensive for everybody here."

• 5:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, we'd love to be done by the weekend. I think, I think we can make contact with someone in Mildura and we, even in first instance, get someone to walk in there with the video glasses on. Scope it out, we, we can then look at the footage, we can then start to get a bit of information, build up a list of questions we need answered. Where are the keys? What's the art situation like? What does the building look like? What's the schematics of the building? Wouldn't it be, "Oh, let's get blueprints"?

• 5:46Speaker 02

  Yeah, we'll definitely get blueprints. All right, is that the one we're going for?

• 5:50Speaker 03

  Is it an art heist from an accounting firm in Mildura where we steal the company's Suzuki as well?

• 5:55Speaker 02

  I think it is, isn't it? Yeah, it is, okay, great.

• 5:58Speaker 03

  So, with that in mind... Just commence operation. That's what we say.

• 6:04Speaker 02

  I know, but then you go off and do nothing, you go off and play golf.

• 6:07Speaker 03

  I'm the one that bought the job. I bought the job to the crew.

• 6:12Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, all right, I'll get on.

• 6:16Speaker 02

  Get on to it, we did.

• 6:17Speaker 03

  We did, Ando, but is it, and again, I'm not spoiling anything, not telegraphing anything, but God, we were actually really well organised in that first instance when we.

• 6:29Speaker 03

  Because what month, any idea what month that was? I feel like that was about May.

• 6:32Speaker 02

  That was ages ago.

• 6:33Speaker 03

  That was really early in the year. If you were a fly on the wall, hearing that in May, you go, these guys are going to pull this off. No dramas. Like, we, we had such great stuff to go on there.

• 6:46Speaker 02

  And energy.

• 6:47Speaker 03

  There was an energy. And I think, and this is a bit of, this is a bit of, sometimes a bit of a pattern in my life. When there's too much energy at the start.

• 6:55Speaker 02

  And you're exhausted.

• 6:57Speaker 03

  That can entice you to coast. If, worst thing that could, worst thing that could happen for me in an Olympic real eighteen is you, you give me a huge lead. Like, I'm the first leg. Cause I would jump in and, and, and enjoy, enjoy the buffer too much.

• 7:13Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 7:13Speaker 03

  And I try to cram at the end.

• 7:15Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 7:15Speaker 03

  People might sense a bit of enjoying the buffer creeping in. Because we sort of took it from there on, okay, great, we've got, you know, we, we had to go quiet on air because of course we're like, we don't want people. You know, if you're in an accounting firm in Mildura, there's, there's not going to be too many of them and you're like, okay, well, we, that could be us. We have a painting in our store. We have a Suzuki Swift as our company car.

• 7:36Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 7:36Speaker 03

  So we had to completely stop talking about it, but behind the scenes.

• 7:39Speaker 02

  And a lot of that was redacted, but we got working behind the scenes. When I say working, we let it, let it drift for a few months, but then we have booked all the flights to Mildura. And we did have a meeting probably two months ago.

• 7:51Speaker 03

  Yeah, to go, okay, guys, it's creeping up November, you know, we know we want to, we know we want to pull this high soft sort of mid November. Yeah. Should we just circle back? How's everyone feeling about the robbery?

• 8:02Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 8:02Speaker 03

  Um, we thought any more about it? Um, have we progressed? Do we need to, you know, should we start putting a plan together and start working on things?

• 8:11Speaker 02

  I think we all felt that the energy was carrying and we might've been thinking about it for a long time in the lead up to our first Burg bunker meeting.

• 8:19Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 8:20Speaker 02

  But as you'll see, maybe not.

• 8:21Speaker 03

  We're like, let's get together, actually like clunk our brains together and really like lock down the plan for how we're going to pull this off.

• 8:35Speaker 03

  Welcome Burg Boys. Any of you followed your way here? Well, it doesn't matter because we're recording this in front of signs that say Burg bunker that Jess put up. I mean, everyone has their own bunker, don't they?

• 8:46Speaker 02

  What do you mean everyone has their own bunker?

• 8:48Speaker 03

  Like in Heist films, they all have their spot. I thought you were talking about the house you're building. No, mate, not everyone has a golf sim underground. Yeah, they have a spot. Usually it's a warehouse or something that will be burned afterwards for evidence.

• 9:03Speaker 02

  Which we will do in here at great cost to the radio station.

• 9:08Speaker 03

  Let Gino know to come and get a lot of the tech out before we torch the place. Hey, first of all, I love that we haven't let this peter out. We've all been thinking about it a lot. Love that we're back in here doing the update.

• 9:20Speaker 02

  I've got a small agenda.

• 9:22Speaker 03

  Great. I just wanted to say off the top, have we put more thought into like making little signs and stuff and the excitement of coming in here? Like I wouldn't have got a coffee in a chocolate bar before this because I was excited to, you know, get down to business and talk about the job. And I just don't feel like we've made any progress. Do you guys feel like you've made any progress since last time? Are you bringing any new information?

• 9:41Speaker 02

  No, no. Not, definitely not new. Not really.

• 9:44Speaker 03

  Me neither. Wasn't someone going to get us the information, like blueprints, where the keys are?

• 9:49Speaker 02

  You were in charge of building.

• 9:51Speaker 03

  I said that.

• 9:52Speaker 02

  You said, you said, you definitely said blueprints. You said that you would get us. So that's what I was looking forward to today. I was like, well, Haynes is going to bring the blueprints.

• 10:01Speaker 03

  I said that.

• 10:01Speaker 02

  Yes, you said that.

• 10:03Speaker 03

  Why would I say that?

• 10:04Speaker 02

  Well, that's what I was surprised.

• 10:05Speaker 03

  How would I get blueprints?

• 10:06Speaker 02

  Well, I was surprised as well.

• 10:08Speaker 03

  Well, because I, before coming in, I Googled the offices, like where they are in Mildura. There's a shot of reception and I was like, oh good, I'm looking forward to having some of this filled in, like having some of the blanks filled in.

• 10:23Speaker 02

  So are we.

• 10:24Speaker 03

  So now we all are. Okay, well, we've got to get the blueprints.

• 10:30Speaker 02

  We know, mate. It was you who were in charge of it.

• 10:33Speaker 03

  That's a given. We have to get the floor plan at least.

• 10:35Speaker 02

  Yes, that's what you said you'd get last time. Do you want to pass that back to me?

• 10:40Speaker 03

  Someone's got to get it.

• 10:43Speaker 04

  This is how I've seen this move a hundred times where he's like, oh, someone's gonna do it. Like waiting for somebody to fill the void. He did it with that coffee, actually. Because he's like, oh, Jess is working with us. He's like, ah, Jess, like, ah, I feel like a coffee. Like, I could go down and get it. But if you are going downstairs, I'll, I'll get it. I'll get it. But if you are going downstairs, I would love a macchiato. There's no reason for me to go downstairs. All of the work is up here.

• 11:10Speaker 03

  Guys, we must not let cracks appear like this.

• 11:16Speaker 03

  We cannot have, this can't become a shame.

• 11:18Speaker 04

  I will get, I will get the plans.

• 11:20Speaker 03

  I'll get them.

• 11:22Speaker 04

  No, you won't.

• 11:22Speaker 03

  All right, well, I tried. I tried. He stole it off me.

• 11:26Speaker 04

  I'm going to put follow up things, and that is me.

• 11:31Speaker 03

  I'll follow you up.

• 11:34Speaker 03

  I'll be the backup follow up.

• 11:35Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 11:36Speaker 03

  Here's, here's the thing, just so this doesn't frustrate us or the listeners following on this exciting journey. I think we need to leave this meeting with the skeleton of a plan. And then we need to apply things like actual floor plan to that to see if it works. And the, the big question for me is the location of the items, the artwork and the keys. Did anyone find that out?

• 12:03Speaker 03

  Did anyone?

• 12:03Speaker 04

  I know where the, the painting is.

• 12:05Speaker 03

  It's in the stairwell, isn't it?

• 12:06Speaker 04

  Yeah, but we don't, we, we all know that. We got told it last time.

• 12:09Speaker 03

  But we don't know where the keys are kept. That's a big thing for me. Because the big, the big one for me is we're gonna, if we're gonna steal this.

• 12:16Speaker 04

  Company car. I imagine they're at reception.

• 12:18Speaker 03

  But we don't know that.

• 12:19Speaker 04

  We don't know that.

• 12:20Speaker 03

  Are we allowed to ask, under the rules of this game, are we allowed to ask the owner, Rob? Are we allowed to ask him and go?

• 12:27Speaker 04

  No, no, it's got a, because.

• 12:28Speaker 03

  He just said robbers.

• 12:30Speaker 04

  A burglar doesn't ring up for the owner.

• 12:32Speaker 03

  I know.

• 12:33Speaker 04

  Just wondering where you.

• 12:34Speaker 03

  I always say that. Just didn't know how much we were allowed to have.

• 12:37Speaker 04

  No.

• 12:37Speaker 03

  What if we just put it reception? A lockbox thing and it had Suzuki keys on it. We said Suzuki keys for reception and.

• 12:47Speaker 02

  And hope they put the keys in.

• 12:49Speaker 03

  They might go, oh, okay, that's a new system. We have to put the Suzuki keys.

• 12:54Speaker 02

  When are we putting the box in there?

• 12:55Speaker 03

  Like, we're just walking in disguise.

• 12:57Speaker 02

  What? They adopt the system within two hours.

• 13:00Speaker 03

  I don't know. If you're on reception and you saw.

• 13:02Speaker 02

  We need to set.

• 13:04Speaker 03

  I must have missed an email. I better put the Suzuki keys.

• 13:07Speaker 02

  I love the idea.

• 13:08Speaker 03

  I'm just thinking laterally, yeah, that's what you do in the bunker.

• 13:10Speaker 02

  One idea I had was I think we need to clear the office.

• 13:16Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:16Speaker 02

  And I think the best way to do that is an emergency. I think gas leak.

• 13:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:22Speaker 02

  Not pumping gas in there, though. I think we.

• 13:25Speaker 03

  You think we come in as workers and go, there's been a gas leak.

• 13:27Speaker 02

  There's been a report, there's been a report of a gas leak. Can we have everybody out?

• 13:32Speaker 02

  And whether we come in as fire people.

• 13:34Speaker 03

  Yeah, or just tradies.

• 13:36Speaker 02

  Or tradies.

• 13:36Speaker 03

  With big beards.

• 13:41Speaker 02

  With Andy's, we can search the whole building for the keys, not just assume they're in reception. Hmm. In that box. The system that they just set up 45 minutes earlier.

• 13:50Speaker 03

  Yeah, but the gas leak, it works. You won't be able to smoke for that entire 10 minutes. It'll give it away if we're, if you're walking around smoking. I'm just saying, none of us can smoke for that whole 10 minutes.

• 14:00Speaker 02

  Is there a way where we put them on the phone to someone? And we have that person in the van that's, you know, patched a call in the wrong way. That's always fun and aim in a heist.

• 14:10Speaker 03

  Miljira gas leaks emergency hotline. Yes, we've been told we have to evacuate a building. Yes, you must get out.

• 14:17Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 14:17Speaker 03

  And don't look back.

• 14:20Speaker 02

  Particularly in the painting.

• 14:21Speaker 03

  The other thing I thought would, that could be fun is they're directly opposite a park. I noticed on Google Maps. Could we put on a concert, a free concert or like a carnival?

• 14:33Speaker 02

  Well.

• 14:34Speaker 03

  To try and empty the office out to get everyone to go over for like, imagine we put on free donuts and.

• 14:39Speaker 02

  Yeah. They, I reckon. And we stole a painting and a car worth less than putting on a carnival. That's what I reckon has to, it has to be, we can't spend more money than what we would theoretically make in the book.

• 14:51Speaker 03

  I'm not interested in a load rent artist. I'm only interested in a big elaborate one.

• 14:56Speaker 02

  They're more likely to leave with a gas leak than just like a petting zoo across the road.

• 15:00Speaker 03

  That's why I am going back to gas leak and not because of your idea about are you scared to take a risk? But because.

• 15:06Speaker 02

  Depends how big the artist is that's playing across the road.

• 15:08Speaker 03

  You're scared to dream big, but Andy does have a point. I can imagine I'll feel quite foolish if we've. Put on a carnival and no one chooses to leave. And we're down 30 grand.

• 15:21Speaker 02

  For a pirate ship or something that you've.

• 15:24Speaker 03

  Cause no one, he just didn't, it wasn't really their thing.

• 15:31Speaker 02

  So I think I know the answer to this, but on my, next on my agenda was, do we want disguises?

• 15:35Speaker 03

  Yes, please.

• 15:36Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 15:37Speaker 03

  I would like to be an old man and the gas leak.

• 15:42Speaker 02

  It hurts the old man thing.

• 15:45Speaker 02

  Why are you pushing this old man towards the gas leak?

• 15:49Speaker 03

  From the council and fun fact, I was actually the, the first governor of the town, but I'm still allowed to work for the council in a gas capacity.

• 15:57Speaker 02

  Yeah. We've got our oldest member of this emergency team. He's got, he's got a nose for the gas. We wheel him around.

• 16:05Speaker 03

  I fit a wheelchair, which means we can break down the painting and put it in my wheelchair to get us, to get us out of there.

• 16:12Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 16:12Speaker 03

  Here's, all right, division of labour. The good thing about the gas leak is we can wear masks. And that does hide the face. Well, we can wear those like painting masks.

• 16:22Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 16:22Speaker 03

  Like with the, the respirators on the side.

• 16:24Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 16:25Speaker 03

  Jack, you're less likely, no offence.

• 16:28Speaker 02

  No, I agree.

• 16:28Speaker 03

  To be spotted.

• 16:29Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 16:30Speaker 03

  So I think you could be the person outside, making sure everyone gets away from the building.

• 16:34Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 16:34Speaker 03

  And that puts Andy and me inside.

• 16:36Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 16:36Speaker 03

  We need a lot of props. So I think it needs to be really clear. Once they get outside, like flashing orange lights, witch's hats. You know, a lot of stuff to get them off over there. We have to build the barrier first. And we really got to get them out off the other side of the barrier.

• 16:50Speaker 04

  One of us like find out what would actually happen. Like we could research what actually happens when a building is evacuated for a gas leak. And we borrow some of the things that they really do.

• 17:00Speaker 03

  All of them. Yeah, we should run it like a real gas leak.

• 17:03Speaker 02

  So then is Jack going to go up and say, hey, we've got reports of a gas leak on this level?

• 17:09Speaker 04

  I guess so.

• 17:10Speaker 02

  Or are we going?

• 17:11Speaker 04

  I can tell you want the old man to do it, but.

• 17:14Speaker 03

  No, I'm just, how authoritative can you be? Go. Supply and reception.

• 17:19Speaker 04

  Hello, there has been a report of a gas leak in this building.

• 17:24Speaker 03

  I haven't heard anything.

• 17:26Speaker 04

  Well, you wouldn't say that.

• 17:29Speaker 03

  You might. You might say, I haven't heard anything. Oh, right. Oh, that's no good.

• 17:33Speaker 04

  Yes. And I mean, we should be fine, but I just want to be more safe than sorry. So we've got a unit that comes in. It does mean that the building has to evacuate. Um, sorry for the disruption, but we will go through the building, make sure there is no gas leak. And make sure that everyone's safe to come back in.

• 17:48Speaker 03

  Don't you just check outside?

• 17:50Speaker 04

  No, this is an indoor one.

• 17:57Speaker 02

  I think it's working. Jack, I reckon that's working.

• 17:59Speaker 03

  You have to be assertive though. You can't just be like, well, we're going to be better set. So it's like, unfortunately you have to leave.

• 18:03Speaker 04

  Yes, yeah.

• 18:05Speaker 03

  We have to evacuate you guys.

• 18:06Speaker 02

  Well, people know what Jack looks like. Should, is this the part where we hire an actor? Like, is this the part where we're bringing in an extra person? And then we can all go in off the back of that.

• 18:16Speaker 03

  Who do you think?

• 18:18Speaker 04

  Angus Samson?

• 18:20Speaker 03

  Way more recognizable.

• 18:21Speaker 04

  Way more, way more.

• 18:22Speaker 03

  He's been in Hollywood films.

• 18:25Speaker 04

  I just love him.

• 18:27Speaker 03

  Sure, but that's the wrong way to go for this.

• 18:29Speaker 04

  I, I think.

• 18:30Speaker 03

  Has to be someone from like your hockey club or something.

• 18:32Speaker 04

  Yeah. None of them are good enough actors.

• 18:35Speaker 02

  I think I could do it. Would you shave your beard and just go mustache for it?

• 18:38Speaker 04

  Yep, yep.

• 18:39Speaker 03

  Why are we thinking that's a tough look?

• 18:43Speaker 02

  It's not about looking tough.

• 18:44Speaker 03

  Look like a barista.

• 18:45Speaker 02

  I'm trying to change his, no, I'm trying to change his appeal. It's not about being tough, like the.

• 18:51Speaker 03

  Would you change, shave your whole head into a scar?

• 18:56Speaker 03

  No, so that being authority.

• 18:57Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 18:58Speaker 04

  Because I think as well, if we were real burglars, the less people

• 19:02Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 19:02Speaker 04

  in the pie, the less.

• 19:04Speaker 03

  You can't just hire Angus Sampson as a real burglar. He'd say no. He's a law-abiding citizen. So soon as we get everyone out and Andy and I are there in the masks, and you're like, okay, that's everyone, go, we hit our timers and we've got five minutes. Was that a shiver of excitement or you do need to do a week?

• 19:25Speaker 04

  That was a shiver of like, wow, we're really doing this.

• 19:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, okay. I thought it might have been this shiver.

• 19:33Speaker 02

  So we don't have to take a break. Now, just quickly.

• 19:36Speaker 03

  So I'm saying five minutes, five minutes will be the timer and then we'll go like, where's the keys? Where's the keys? Keys, get the painting.

• 19:41Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 19:42Speaker 03

  Jack, you'll have to pack up outside as well.

• 19:44Speaker 04

  And will you be?

• 19:45Speaker 03

  Actually, no, you can just leave it all there, but you need to get in the van and you need to get out of there. Me and Andy will be escaping in the Suzuki.

• 19:51Speaker 04

  Oh yeah, I guess I don't have to escape in the escape car. What if they see the Suzuki burning off down the street and I'm still there putting witch's hats together?

• 19:58Speaker 02

  Is there, that's what I was just wondering. Is there, is there a way we could hire a truck that we drive the Suzuki up into?

• 20:05Speaker 03

  Oh, that's, that's awesome, but it is, I think it's pretty heavily just Fast and the Furious type stuff.

• 20:10Speaker 02

  Mate, all of this is.

• 20:13Speaker 03

  Putting out witch's hats is doable. Doing a moving drive up the back of a car, a truck is.

• 20:19Speaker 02

  Not moving.

• 20:19Speaker 04

  No, no.

• 20:20Speaker 02

  I was talking about we park the truck and just drive it over.

• 20:22Speaker 03

  Trying to keep costs down, I'm not allowed to do a carnival, but we can all, we've got to buy a semi-trailer that can take a car. Again, we'd have to buy the semi-trailer and who's the driver of the semi-trailer? It's not us.

• 20:32Speaker 04

  Not us.

• 20:33Speaker 03

  Yeah. It expands, I mean, I love the idea, but can't we just steal the Suzuki?

• 20:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:38Speaker 03

  The game is, we've been hired to do a job and the job is to steal the painting and the Suzuki. Once they're off the premises, we've won.

• 20:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 20:46Speaker 03

  I want to actually keeping these things. It's like, that's one for the burg boys, we did the job.

• 20:50Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 20:51Speaker 03

  I will not be an old man now, which I think is a nice give from me, but I will have a cool wig on.

• 20:58Speaker 04

  Okay. Okay.

• 21:00Speaker 02

  I think we do need a disguise.

• 21:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:02Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 21:02Speaker 03

  Because we're also going to have the face mask, like the gas, gas masks.

• 21:05Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 21:06Speaker 03

  What if we went something that's even more than a, um, why don't we go full chemical suits? That's pretty fun.

• 21:12Speaker 04

  Yeah. Also heads covered as well.

• 21:13Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, just because why not? And we just go, look, so sorry guys, we've got, you know, there is a leak, like a, we don't know what it is. Um, but we think there's been a hazardous. Spill.

• 21:24Speaker 04

  There is something sus about that. If someone came to your work, do you think you'd believe that if you couldn't even see through the visor?

• 21:30Speaker 03

  For extra believability, let's just say they came to work and there was a spill, like a big spill or something.

• 21:37Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah.

• 21:38Speaker 03

  And there's a sign, like, information going, call, you know, in, this is, we've had a chemical spill here, call this number if you'd like a team to check out the chemical spill. They call us and we go, yep, we can send a unit round. And they go, sorry, we just need everyone out of the building while we do the cleanup.

• 21:53Speaker 04

  Yeah, I really like that.

• 21:54Speaker 02

  So if we put an emergency notice on the front door that said, hey, to the owners of this, can you please call this number? Should we get a 1-800 number for this?

• 22:04Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 22:04Speaker 02

  Thing that connects one of our phones?

• 22:06Speaker 03

  That's good.

• 22:06Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 22:07Speaker 03

  Please call this number when you arrive.

• 22:09Speaker 02

  There's no danger from small exposure, but we would like, you know, you know, yeah. Okay, I think that's fun. Then we can actually.

• 22:15Speaker 03

  The only danger might be to your company car.

• 22:18Speaker 02

  Do it with a wink.

• 22:20Speaker 03

  Let's put some bollards out with some flashing orange lights. It looks like we've been in the area.

• 22:24Speaker 02

  After the call, we go in, get upstairs, the painting now. I think we need to bring in some equipment.

• 22:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, so we can smuggle the painting out.

• 22:33Speaker 02

  We smuggle the painting out.

• 22:33Speaker 03

  We'll have trolleys and bins and stuff, you know.

• 22:36Speaker 04

  Well, another part of good surveillance then is finding out how big measurements and how big the artwork is.

• 22:42Speaker 03

  Are we sitting in the old man or what?

• 22:44Speaker 02

  I don't think, I think the old man.

• 22:46Speaker 04

  Why is he taking a measuring tape and measuring the size of the artwork?

• 22:49Speaker 03

  He's wandering around the building, filming things that we can look at and then go, okay, that actually answers a lot of questions. That's how big the painting is.

• 22:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, the old man might jeopardize the entire operation.

• 23:02Speaker 03

  Honestly, I think the old man, the day before, filming stuff is kind of the key to the whole thing.

• 23:11Speaker 03

  Old man with the camera hat on.

• 23:13Speaker 04

  It would just be such a shame if that's what, before we.

• 23:15Speaker 03

  What are they gonna do? Kick an old man out of their building for looking fake?

• 23:18Speaker 02

  No, a young man pretending to be an old man.

• 23:21Speaker 04

  Is this the guy from Lego Masters? He was walking around here yesterday. Maybe we should not believe any of this.

• 23:28Speaker 03

  I'm in a cardigan and I'm very heavily prosthetic.

• 23:33Speaker 02

  That's the worry. It's very hard to do that.

• 23:36Speaker 03

  We will get professional help.

• 23:39Speaker 03

  I just want eyes in that building.

• 23:41Speaker 02

  Yeah, we'll send, we can send, we can send Jackie in.

• 23:46Speaker 03

  You reckon you can walk like an old man?

• 23:48Speaker 02

  I don't have to be old, I can be anyone.

• 23:51Speaker 03

  But the old man helps because you look like you've confused.

• 23:54Speaker 02

  But he's gonna get kicked out so fast.

• 23:56Speaker 03

  They're not gonna kick him out so fast. It's not like it's a bank.

• 24:00Speaker 02

  He's not going anywhere past reception though.

• 24:02Speaker 03

  The other thing is guys- I reckon you can walk into any office and just-

• 24:04Speaker 02

  We've got the whole thing locked down, not allowed in. We're gonna find the painting. It's in the main, that's right.

• 24:11Speaker 03

  That's true. It's a two-storey building and it's in the stairwell. So there is only one stairwell it can be in. Alright. Here's my worry, last, last, last thing. This has been, this meeting's been too long. The car park is so visible from the street. It's not an underground car park at all. It's like around the back of the building car park. If me and Andy are out there, with the gas workers trying to break, trying to break into the car, and the whole office is watching us, that might be a giveaway that these gas workers aren't really gas workers, because aren't they trying to steal this?

• 24:47Speaker 02

  Yeah. So why don't we set up a huge white pop-up tent?

• 24:51Speaker 03

  Yeah, or, or that's all taped up and Jack, it's your job to keep everyone away from the car park. You have to keep them away from the car park.

• 24:59Speaker 02

  So what, what we should do is go past the night before and see if the car is on site. If it's the only car in the car park-

• 25:07Speaker 03

  And it's the only, we know it's a Suzuki Swift.

• 25:09Speaker 02

  Because if we don't know it's there, we have to wait for someone to arrive with it if someone's using the company car.

• 25:13Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 25:14Speaker 02

  So if it is there, then we can tape up not only the front door, but the whole car park.

• 25:22Speaker 03

  So that's good.

• 25:23Speaker 02

  And at night, we could all, we could also put up a white tent, you know, those pop-up white tents? To, to, to block off that whole car park and tape it up to just explain.

• 25:35Speaker 03

  I think we want a van, yeah.

• 25:37Speaker 02

  We've been here.

• 25:38Speaker 03

  We're looking. There's been, there's been issues.

• 25:41Speaker 02

  And then how many total days are we in Mildura doing the heist?

• 25:44Speaker 03

  At the moment, we're booked in for coming in the night before, heisting and then getting out. So two nights total. But we thought we'd have a big party, celebrate the heist.

• 25:57Speaker 02

  What do you mean?

• 25:58Speaker 03

  Well, we thought we'd go for some beers and stuff after the heist.

• 26:01Speaker 02

  Oh, okay.

• 26:02Speaker 03

  Could you stay for heist beers?

• 26:03Speaker 02

  No, just like-

• 26:06Speaker 02

  We literally thought it'd be fun, have a party that we've celebrated the heist and come back to follow down to that.

• 26:13Speaker 04

  Okay, because by then we've already told them, like, you've been hit by the Burg Boys.

• 26:17Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 26:18Speaker 03

  Yeah, some of them might wanna come to the hot, to the.

• 26:20Speaker 04

  To the party, okay, yeah, yeah. I thought, like, wouldn't we wanna get the hell out of Mandurah? But I forgot that we're not keeping the stuff.

• 26:26Speaker 03

  Yeah, then we really are robbing the car. No, this is to give, then we give it back to Rob and like, he'll tell the staff, listen, guys, you gotta be sharper than this because this morning that was a fake hazardous chemical leak.

• 26:37Speaker 02

  Yep, yeah.

• 26:37Speaker 03

  And these, the gas workers stole the company car. That could happen any day and that's a real risk for any accounting firm.

• 26:44Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 26:45Speaker 04

  Him telling his accounting staff, hey, don't let somebody steal the car from the car park, what are they gonna say? Get more security?

• 26:53Speaker 03

  They'll go, thanks, boss. Yeah, that's on us. We let the ball drop.

• 26:56Speaker 02

  I don't think the point of it is for the boss to have a go at his staff.

• 27:00Speaker 03

  No, no, it's just.

• 27:00Speaker 02

  He's setting his own security measures and he'll look back and go.

• 27:04Speaker 03

  Okay, we're susceptible to fake gas leaks.

• 27:06Speaker 02

  What could I have done differently? Yeah.

• 27:07Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:08Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 27:10Speaker 02

  Okay, so actionable. I'll get the plan.

• 27:14Speaker 03

  Good.

• 27:15Speaker 02

  Jax?

• 27:16Speaker 04

  I'm gonna research what actually happens when a gas leak occurs and what's some real things that would happen if an outfit like this came to your workplace?

• 27:25Speaker 02

  Can you send me the name of the body that you'd call?

• 27:31Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 27:32Speaker 02

  And then I'll make up our decals for our signs?

• 27:35Speaker 04

  Yep.

• 27:35Speaker 02

  And.

• 27:36Speaker 03

  And someone's gotta get onto like, you know what I mean, the sawhorse kind of like bollard things like.

• 27:41Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 27:42Speaker 03

  The black and yellow barricade type things, because we just need like 10 of those.

• 27:46Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:46Speaker 03

  A bunch of tape and a bunch of, yeah, transit, Ford, like, you know, big, big van, a bunch of yellow flashing light stuff.

• 27:55Speaker 04

  Yep. And where are we at with needing an old man outfit or disguise?

• 28:01Speaker 02

  I think we don't need it. I don't think we need it either.

• 28:05Speaker 03

  And may God have mercy on you all as you fly into this plan completely unprepared. Fine.

• 28:11Speaker 02

  So there you go. That's the plan. You'll find out whether we pulled it off next week.

• 28:16Speaker 03

  All of next week's show will be a Burg Boys spectacular to finish out the year. We won't give anything else away. We don't know yet. I mean, we're in the same boat as you right now going, how did, how did they go?

• 28:26Speaker 02

  Confident.

• 28:27Speaker 03

  Because we're recording this before the day we did the high switch. Again, if you're listening on the 27th, it's that day. But I will say this, knowing that we are heading into about to in real life doing Burg Boys, the old man, don't give up on the old man.

• 28:42Speaker 04

  We already gave up on him.

• 28:44Speaker 03

  No, no, but don't, do not give up on him. He's gonna make a resurgence.

• 28:53Speaker 02

  So Ham, given that Burg Boys is exclusively the show next week, we've got to tie up loose ends.

• 28:59Speaker 03

  We do. This is almost, this is the funnest part of the end of the year. One of the funnest parts of the end of the year is loose ends. But it's always a, it's always a slight worry for me because I, I always forget what, I'm so good at petering out that I just let, I never think of it again.

• 29:14Speaker 02

  Well, I've got one off the, off the bat.

• 29:16Speaker 03

  Oh yeah, yeah. I actually do have a couple.

• 29:18Speaker 02

  Cause what we do is we're basically just gonna decide now whether it's a peter out or are we gonna do it again?

• 29:22Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 29:23Speaker 02

  The Olympics for people to undress in under two seconds.

• 29:27Speaker 03

  I feel like this is.

• 29:28Speaker 02

  I know, I know.

• 29:29Speaker 03

  This is last year.

• 29:32Speaker 02

  Well, no, we still like it.

• 29:33Speaker 03

  Really?

• 29:35Speaker 02

  No, I still like it. I think we kick it down to next, kick it to next year.

• 29:38Speaker 04

  Jack? I think if it's, it's spanned a full year without any action.

• 29:44Speaker 03

  Almost two, almost two years.

• 29:45Speaker 04

  I think it's gone.

• 29:45Speaker 02

  I think it's gone as well, unfortunately.

• 29:47Speaker 03

  Do we need three votes for a full peter? Cause I'll keep bringing it up. All right. Well, why don't we just go, it's now a two thirds majority peter out.

• 29:55Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 29:56Speaker 03

  But we are, it's now on me to remember to keep bringing it up.

• 30:00Speaker 04

  So it's as good as a peter out.

• 30:03Speaker 03

  We got close. We got very close. When are we gonna have, we're gonna have people auditioning from all around Australia and then?

• 30:10Speaker 04

  Few people sent in and then we had to fly them all in.

• 30:12Speaker 03

  It lost, lost its wind when over a year ago, the guy that said he could do it in two seconds was adamant. And then his girlfriend said he can, but he doesn't feel like it this week. And then we just.

• 30:19Speaker 02

  And then he nominated me to be the only one to see him nude and that was.

• 30:23Speaker 03

  Right. Yeah. It has to be Andy. By the way, it's, I meant two minutes, but can I still do it?

• 30:31Speaker 03

  Well, who knows, who knows?

• 30:32Speaker 02

  Can we say line through it?

• 30:34Speaker 03

  Could be resurrected.

• 30:35Speaker 02

  No. Okay, well.

• 30:39Speaker 03

  We will never, I will never ring it up again.

• 30:41Speaker 02

  I might, yeah, okay.

• 30:42Speaker 03

  Um, look, this isn't a Peter, this is more just a loose end that I think, this is more just a tapping in to see that something's going well.

• 30:50Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 30:51Speaker 03

  Um, our campaign to make sure that ball golf was adequately, adequately labelled as such. Instead of just lazily calling it golf, because there are many kinds of golf. Uh, I just wanted to touch base, I just wanted to give a shout out to a bit of a legend of a listener, Michael. Who is in real estate and he does a lot of drone photography and they have to often take a picture, you know, sometimes you get a picture of a house. To show you what's nearby, like, you know, here are the shops, here's the train station. And now when he does, uh, he's, he's sent us a bit of, um, drone photography from one of the properties that he's been doing. And it's right near, it's like, oh, he's, it's in Perth, he's Swanbourne Beach, but he is also the ball golf club nearby. And so it's officially labelled.

• 31:34Speaker 02

  Good, I like that.

• 31:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 31:36Speaker 02

  Um, the coin, people are asking about the coin. Not a Peter out, but Jim Chalmers has put up a stubborn wall. And we've.

• 31:45Speaker 03

  I, I thought we were, I thought we were weeks away at one stage from getting the reveal. Did you think that, Jack? And you said, you, you were like.

• 31:52Speaker 02

  You came in hot one time.

• 31:54Speaker 03

  You were like, I've got something.

• 31:55Speaker 02

  I did, I did.

• 31:56Speaker 03

  And then even when we turn off the mics, you were like, just couldn't say it today, but it would be, it's gonna be weeks away.

• 32:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, I thought it was.

• 32:05Speaker 04

  Well, that was more than weeks ago, definitely, that was a long time ago.

• 32:08Speaker 02

  This is our effort to, I mean, we are the single-handedly, I would say.

• 32:11Speaker 03

  I don't want to, how about this, I don't want to hear any more about the coin till I see it in my hot hand.

• 32:16Speaker 02

  Okay, that's fine, I'm just gonna say to bring people up to speed, we feel like we should be added to a coin, there's so many commemorative coins. They argue that it's only people that are dead are allowed on the coins or fictional characters, Mel Meninga was on one this year, he's still alive. They keep lying through their.

• 32:31Speaker 03

  Their arguments are terrible, we know that.

• 32:32Speaker 02

  Um. At hamishandandy.com, people upload audio. And even if it felt like a peter out for us, there are some people out there that are still flying the flag. And I stumbled across this one on my side of the fence, and it's from comedian Troy Kinney. And he'd uploaded a bit of audio. Just, he could have texted and said, "Hey mate, I've uploaded something." He didn't. He just left it to the email gods to see if we discovered it. And this is what came in.

• 33:00Speaker 05

  G'day, Hamish and Andy and the Weasel. Troy Kinney here from Melbourne. Fan of the show, dare I say, possible friend of the show. I hope I'm not overstepping here in a couple of ways. Essentially, I've noticed a lack of talk about the Hamish and Andy coin possibility. So I've taken it upon myself to keep the momentum going. The other way I may have overstepped is the tactic I've employed is Hamish's old ultimate wingman tactic he used to use with the single version of Andy, in that I've gone into my local post office and just taken on the attitude that the Hamish and Andy coin does exist,

• 33:44Speaker 05

  so that when I find out it doesn't, I can act like that is ridiculous and the people in charge of making the coin feel like they have really missed an opportunity. Here's that conversation for you now. I can only assume it's going to help the cause. Do you sell the Hamish and Andy coin?

• 34:00Speaker 06

  No.

• 34:02Speaker 05

  Hamish and Andy podcast commemorative coin.

• 34:04Speaker 06

  Let me have a look. There's coins coming out over the next month. I've got a book here. I'll have a look for you. Hamish and Andy. That'd be a good coin, wouldn't it?

• 34:15Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 34:16Speaker 06

  No, no, Hamish and Andy.

• 34:18Speaker 05

  What? So the Hamish and Andy coin actually doesn't exist?

• 34:22Speaker 06

  No.

• 34:23Speaker 05

  Seems like a wasted opportunity, doesn't it? Considering all the other coins they're willing to put out.

• 34:30Speaker 06

  We haven't got Hello Kitty.

• 34:31Speaker 05

  Hello Kitty? You kid me?

• 34:34Speaker 05

  How an Australian can you get?

• 34:40Speaker 03

  Off work coin, more of that.

• 34:42Speaker 02

  More of that.

• 34:42Speaker 03

  Firmly, yeah, we don't need to harp on about it every week on the show, but to get that dollar coin.

• 34:47Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 34:47Speaker 03

  Firmly support anyone hitting a post office.

• 34:50Speaker 02

  Just checking to see if they sell them. I like the lady said, that'd be a good coin.

• 34:53Speaker 03

  That'd be a good one. She's on board.

• 34:55Speaker 02

  She's on board, so.

• 34:57Speaker 03

  Let it filter up. More of those in the post office, please. Less off-brand Transformers.

• 35:01Speaker 02

  But not a Peter out, it continued.

• 35:03Speaker 03

  Not a Peter out. Jack.

• 35:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:05Speaker 03

  I picked up a few of these through the email.

• 35:07Speaker 02

  Go ahead.

• 35:08Speaker 03

  How's the board game going?

• 35:15Speaker 02

  I like this one as well.

• 35:16Speaker 03

  The way you said, oh, oh, just about.

• 35:20Speaker 02

  You can't even say you're busy.

• 35:22Speaker 04

  No, I can't, yeah. I get people messaging me saying like, do you want to co-build the board game?

• 35:29Speaker 02

  This is a Hamish and Andy board game.

• 35:30Speaker 03

  Well, you said, I'll make a board game of the show.

• 35:33Speaker 04

  Yes. I remember being excited about that as I started and I'm like thinking like mini microphone figurines. I'm like, who's gonna play this?

• 35:41Speaker 03

  It doesn't have to be that. You've got an creative for your own bad idea. There's not only one option to make the board game. You've immediately fallen out of love with it.

• 35:51Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:51Speaker 03

  Jack, you've been building a sauna all year.

• 35:54Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 35:55Speaker 03

  Is there a board game in a building a sauna? Could you like win materials, win sponsored content from like, you know, oh, you've won the chance to, you know.

• 36:03Speaker 02

  Jack.

• 36:03Speaker 04

  No, that sounds even more boring than the Hamish and Andy game.

• 36:06Speaker 03

  Jack, this is your opportunity to say, I'm not doing it.

• 36:10Speaker 04

  Oh, I was about to say I'll do it over summer.

• 36:11Speaker 02

  I know, I've been seeing his face.

• 36:13Speaker 03

  Appreciate that. So when we come back, when we come back, will we have some progress?

• 36:18Speaker 04

  Yeah, it will be, it will be, there will be a prototype to play.

• 36:21Speaker 02

  Yes, there will.

• 36:24Speaker 03

  Far out. That's great news. That's something for the fans to look forward to over summer. Hey, another thing that could, another thing that I'm flagging as a project.

• 36:31Speaker 04

  Excuses.

• 36:32Speaker 03

  Getting out of, you should make a board game and the whole point is getting out of.

• 36:38Speaker 04

  It should be a series of cards. It's like a beat the bomb. You keep making promises until you finally get bored.

• 36:45Speaker 03

  That is a good board game. Like the clock's on. Like, you know, in Scattergories, you have to name as many things as you can in 60 seconds. This should just be, how many excuses can you come up with in 60 seconds? It's like, hey, you've got to bring shopping in. Oh, I've got a sprained wrist. Okay, ding.

• 37:02Speaker 02

  Anyway.

• 37:03Speaker 03

  Okay, speaking of things that are definitely gonna happen over summer, this is not, this is not really on loose ends, but it literally came in today and I wanted to just flag it with you guys, because I think you'll be, you'll, you'll, you'll be on my side here. Actually, I got an email from my kid's school going, you know, I hope everything's going well. Would you be interested in, just before school goes back next year, like end of January, we're doing a staff development day, like they do a day before the kids come back. Could you come and talk to the staff? Would you be up to coming to talk to the staff, doing a speech on the staff development day? And it's a kid's school, and I've never been asked to do this before.

• 37:37Speaker 02

  Come to the staff?

• 37:38Speaker 03

  Well, like do a speech, like they all get together for team building and I guess they need a guest speaker. And so I'm like, if your kid's school asks for, because it's like kindy to year 12. So this is the upper school. I feel like if you, you get asked by the kid's school, you, you go, no worries, I'll do it. So I write back and like, sure, it's kind of the day before school goes back, so holidays are kind of over. Love to do it. What are the timings? Like what, what, what time of the day and how long do you want the speech for? I said, I'll be just before lunch and with like an hour presentation.

• 38:10Speaker 03

  An hour?

• 38:11Speaker 02

  That's more work than you've ever done.

• 38:13Speaker 03

  Mate, an hour presentation on leadership and like.

• 38:17Speaker 02

  Question and answer, mate. Q and A.

• 38:19Speaker 03

  So I'm going back, like I literally am about to respond to the email. I'm going back with a 10 minute offer and 50 minutes of Q and A.

• 38:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. I think 10's a lot, but.

• 38:29Speaker 03

  I mean, I'm sorry, I'm just reeling from this, this has just happened, but an hour? It's outrageous. That's, the TED Talks only go, TED Talks, what are TED Talks?

• 38:37Speaker 02

  15, 20 minutes, I think, yeah.

• 38:38Speaker 03

  20, 15, 20 minutes and there, sometimes they, you, you can even see a bit of padding in that. They can't possibly have had someone speak for an hour.

• 38:46Speaker 02

  I used to go and watch him do speeches at uni in the classes he hadn't prepared for.

• 38:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, sometimes you have to do an oral presentation.

• 38:55Speaker 04

  That's why he's so good at Thank God You're Here.

• 38:57Speaker 03

  Literally, that's what I studied at uni.

• 38:59Speaker 02

  I used to sit in the back deck and just piss myself laughing as the most ill-prepared man in his 19, 20 year old, get up there and go, computer science.

• 39:11Speaker 03

  It basically.

• 39:12Speaker 02

  What does it mean to me? What does it mean to you? And then point at someone just hoping for an offer.

• 39:19Speaker 04

  The Oxford Dictionary defines computer science as.

• 39:22Speaker 03

  But can we believe them? Can we believe them?

• 39:27Speaker 03

  I did a little bit of research myself. Who are these Oxford people? Okay, so anyway, there'll be an update when we get back. Did I do an hour? Or did I do six minutes?

• 39:38Speaker 02

  Hey, I've got a loose end here. As it was only a few weeks ago where you said, I've got a great story. And remember that, Hamish?

• 39:47Speaker 04

  Oh, yes. Africa, Uganda.

• 39:49Speaker 03

  Yeah. Well, it's not even a, it's not a, it's a impactful story. It's probably one of the most impactful things that happened to me throughout the year.

• 39:56Speaker 04

  You said you gave us a warning, essentially.

• 39:58Speaker 03

  Well, I was just like, it maybe could be a keep it or delete it because it's, it's not ungraphic. But I, it's more, it was more just like, oh, it's the kind of thing because, because we're all friends. But when something happens to us, we sometimes go, I won't tell the guys this because I'll just wait till the podcast. So it was one of those things that happened, but like time, life moves on. We're always doing lots of stuff on the podcast. And you just, just didn't get around to telling it.

• 40:25Speaker 02

  Okay, well, let's, let's put, let's hook up the keep it or delete it because if it's too graphic, we're not going to get.

• 40:30Speaker 03

  Too graphic, but it's, it's confronting. I'll lead with this. Have you ever, and I mean, have you ever been properly, and I mean properly, constipated?

• 40:55Speaker 03

  Okay. Keep it or delete it. I guess we go from now.

• 40:59Speaker 04

  If you're hearing this bit, I mean, we've kept it.

• 41:01Speaker 03

  We've kept it. Yeah.

• 41:03Speaker 04

  Gosh.

• 41:04Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 41:05Speaker 04

  You're a long way back just from the teaser.

• 41:08Speaker 03

  Have you ever, have you ever been properly constipated? I don't just mean like, oh, that hurts to pass. I mean, like.

• 41:15Speaker 04

  I don't think so. I've never like sat and not.

• 41:17Speaker 03

  If you can't remember it, you haven't. You haven't.

• 41:20Speaker 02

  When I was a lot younger.

• 41:21Speaker 03

  So we were in, we were in Africa earlier this year. We spent a bunch of time in Uganda. Then we went to, um, down to Cape Town, then back to Johannesburg to fly out. Like you fly back to Australia from Joburg. It was in.

• 41:38Speaker 02

  What are you constipated?

• 41:40Speaker 03

  Oh mate, I don't even know. Maybe it was the anti malaria. It was something, I actually don't even know. Like, there was no change in behaviour. I mean, normally, I'm, I'm like, I've taken short flights before. It wasn't like, nothing had happened.

• 41:54Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 41:55Speaker 03

  It was, we were in Cape Town, I think for six days. And it was on the morning we were leaving to fly Cape Town to Johannesburg.

• 42:02Speaker 02

  Hmm. Did you eat a whole corn cup? Cause that's what the dog, my dog.

• 42:06Speaker 03

  Yeah. Well, funny you mention that. So, no, I didn't. I don't think I did, but I, so I'm sitting, I go to the toilet in the hotel.

• 42:14Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 42:15Speaker 03

  And I sit down and I'm looking at this interesting like photo of like this wildlife photo in front of the toilet. And I go, that's strange. It's an amazing photo. It's like of lions and stuff. I was like, why have I not noticed that the whole time I was here? And I was like, I don't think I've sat on the toilet the whole time. I think I've come in, I've, I've had my back to that photo.

• 42:34Speaker 02

  Well, six days.

• 42:35Speaker 03

  Ones. And I'm looking at going, it's so strange. There's only one toilet in this hotel room. Like, I would have noticed, I would have noticed. And then I'm sitting on the toilet waiting because I, I had to go number two. Like I've got a, you know, there's movement at the station and then nothing's happening. So as these two thoughts are kind of like clicking in my head, why have I never seen that photo before? Why is nothing moving down here? I'm getting fierce contractions. Absolutely nothing's going on.

• 42:59Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 43:00Speaker 03

  Yeah. Like, there's pressure.

• 43:02Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 43:04Speaker 03

  But my God, there's no movement. There's, there's, there's like, something's not correlating. Cause I'm like, I don't, I can't remember the last time I've done a poo. And it definitely hasn't been in this room for the week we've been here. We've got a big problem here.

• 43:17Speaker 02

  Five days?

• 43:18Speaker 03

  It might've been, yeah, five or six days. Like, we got a big problem here.

• 43:22Speaker 02

  When you're feeling.

• 43:23Speaker 03

  Li- literally and figuratively.

• 43:25Speaker 02

  Well, when you're feeling heavy?

• 43:26Speaker 03

  I had felt a bit sick the day before and I think it was because I was going toxic and I was reabsorbing too much of my own poop. And like, my blood poop limit was just going off the charts.

• 43:37Speaker 03

  So then I'm like, okay, this is where it gets a bit graphic. So I go, what do we do here? Um, what is going on down there? Like, nothing's moving.

• 43:45Speaker 04

  You're going to get tablets. You don't, what do you think?

• 43:47Speaker 03

  We're on our way to the airport. No, we're going to the airport. Like, so this is like, all right, everyone. I was like, I'll just, this is a common movement. I'll just go to the toilet while all the suitcases are packed. Last man in, I'm just gonna do, I'm gonna do some business.

• 43:58Speaker 04

  Oh, that's a good idea. So no one else has to go in after you.

• 44:00Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. You certainly don't go, hey, I've just gone and destroyed the toilet. Would you like to go and clean up all your cosmetics on the hotel bathroom? So I've tried to time it like that. I get some paper. I get some toilet paper. And Jack, I warned you, it's gravy. Pop it over the Bombay entrance and just have a tentative poke. Just to go, what is back there, right? And my finger is met with something that feels like a grapefruit. Like, solid, like.

• 44:28Speaker 04

  Right.

• 44:29Speaker 03

  It is absolute, well, we've lost Jack.

• 44:34Speaker 04

  So grapefruit seed.

• 44:35Speaker 03

  Like a, no, no, grapefruit, the.

• 44:37Speaker 04

  Like you're touching the skin of a grapefruit.

• 44:39Speaker 03

  Like I'm touching the skin of a, it's that huge. Like, it's not, there's no, yeah, it's like trying to, I realize my body is trying to push a couch through a cat flap. Like, it is, there's just no way this thing, you can strain all you want and you might get a little bit of one of the.

• 44:55Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 44:56Speaker 03

  The cushion of the arm through, and you're not getting the couch.

• 44:59Speaker 04

  And then the other mate goes, back, back, back, back, back.

• 45:03Speaker 03

  It's not the angle, it's the size. Okay, we have got a big problem here. That thing ain't moving. So I'm like, well, we have to go. Like, we have to go to the airport. So I can't, so now I have a big secret that I'm carrying with me. I come out, so he goes, what's wrong? I go, ah, just, yeah, I'll take it in a sec. I've just, I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. Cause I'm like, what do you do? So we get to the airport. I'm like, I'm sure I'll figure it out. Yeah, chemist at the airport, go to the airport. You know, get everyone settled. We get through the gates. I go, is there a pharmacy here? Oh, it's back through security. I have to get back out of security. Go to the pharmacy and the laxative medication, you drink it, but it takes 24 hours. I was like, I'm not smuggling this thing back into Australia.

• 45:46Speaker 04

  You can't get through customs.

• 45:48Speaker 03

  We have to do something about this now.

• 45:51Speaker 04

  So you're over the.

• 45:52Speaker 02

  Carry on.

• 45:54Speaker 03

  Well, you you entered the country at ninety kilos and we see you leaving at a hundred and fourteen. What's going on?

• 46:00Speaker 02

  So I love border security that got him. We're gonna have to take him for a body scan. That you need to think Channel Seven would love that episode.

• 46:07Speaker 03

  Well, you've got something you've got. We can see you've spotted a massive condom apparel.

• 46:12Speaker 03

  You can get this out of me. I'll do the time. I'll go to jail.

• 46:17Speaker 03

  So there's another way you can do it, which is a suppository.

• 46:23Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 46:23Speaker 03

  Which is a thing you slide up in there.

• 46:25Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 46:26Speaker 03

  And they're made of glycerin, which is like to it's kind of like it's meant to dissolve in there. And I guess just kind of like smooth things. It's kind of like.

• 46:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 46:34Speaker 03

  It's lewd, basically. And it dissolves in like a like a it looks like a little artillery shell.

• 46:38Speaker 02

  Helps break it down.

• 46:40Speaker 03

  Helps break it down. So we need to do something like that. So anyway, I'm having fierce contractions. Like, I'm really struggling now. I have to like and I'm and I do look like I'm guilty because I'm coming back through security and they've seen me before and I've and I'm like writhing around and I'm looking shifty. I go to the bathroom, but the plane's taking off in like half an hour. So I go to the bathroom. This is in Cape Town. So we're just flying like two hours to Johannesburg. I'm I'm I'm like, you meant to dip it. I get into the store. There's a toilet attendant in there. And I meant you meant to dip it in water, the glycerin thing, but I'm already in the bathroom. So I'm like, do I dunk it in the toilet water? That hasn't seemed very sanitary. No. So I'm in there spitting on it.

• 47:22Speaker 02

  No, don't do that.

• 47:26Speaker 03

  Have to loosen. Yeah, have to. You have to lubricate this little.

• 47:29Speaker 02

  Takes the powder to the cubicle. The toilet.

• 47:33Speaker 03

  Now my pants are down like and I'm all I'm in all sorts. I was like, just get this thing in me because every second counts now. We need this to happen before we get on the flight. Anyway, get in there, do it. It's so awkward. Like it really you put in something, you know, you now it's extra awkward. Sit down, but then the flight gets called straight away. As soon as I come in the bathroom, they're like, we're calling the flight. I was like, oh, my God, you meant to leave this thing in for an hour. I think I just have to see if it's worked.

• 48:00Speaker 04

  What?

• 48:01Speaker 03

  So it goes, well, so it goes, do it on the plane. I was like, I can't do it.

• 48:04Speaker 04

  Why not do it on the plane?

• 48:05Speaker 03

  No, because it's gonna take some time for this thing to come out. Anyway, I go to the toilet, it just slipped straight back out. I was like, nothing's happened.

• 48:16Speaker 03

  We have to, so we get on the plane and it's a small plane too. And Zo goes, go put another one in. And do it in here, like do it in the place like, mate, there's, I was like, there's one toilet in here on this plane. Everyone's facing forward, the toilet's at the front.

• 48:31Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 48:32Speaker 03

  Right. There's no business class or anything like it's a small plane, but everyone's looking forward to the toilet.

• 48:37Speaker 03

  I could be in there for an hour. Like, I don't know how this thing's gonna come out. So I was like, I can't do it on the plane. So I go through another two hours of agony, land, put another one in. We do have a bit of a, maybe an hour wait at Johannesburg. I'm like, if I put it in straight away, then we can wait. So I let it kind of cook in there or whatever. And then the flight's getting cold and I was like, you've got to do it. You've got to do it. You can't get on the plane. I can't get on the corner's plane now back to Sydney. Went to the toilet, please, please have worked. Now, I'll spare you the really graphic details.

• 49:12Speaker 04

  Please.

• 49:12Speaker 03

  But it didn't, it didn't turn the couch into a series of, um, you know, tiny, um.

• 49:18Speaker 04

  Cushions.

• 49:18Speaker 03

  It still required a huge amount of effort.

• 49:23Speaker 03

  I came out of the, the whole family's waiting there for me. Like, how'd you go, dad? Like, they were waiting.

• 49:28Speaker 04

  Like the end of a marathon.

• 49:30Speaker 03

  Should have had banners. Yeah. Was this, my support crew was waiting for me. Cause by now everyone knows what's going on. Dad's got a big, big problem. He hasn't done it for a week. And he's trying to get it out before we have to fly it to Australia. The relief was unbelievable.

• 49:41Speaker 04

  Imagine.

• 49:42Speaker 03

  Right. But the pain was ferocious as well. It, it probably took about 10 minutes of like hard labour to get it out. Came out, the kids are like, I give him a thumbs up, kids cheer, the kids cheer. Done it. But I like to look at that, she goes, what, what's happened to your pants?

• 50:01Speaker 02

  What?

• 50:02Speaker 03

  And so I looked down, I was wearing grey tracksuit pants and they, there was a massive like wet patch on the pants because I, I was grimacing, like my eyes were closed through the whole ordeal and I was leaning forward and I, I was drooling the whole time. I thought I was, like my mouth was open in pain and I, and I've just spent 10 minutes dribbling through my pants because I was passing this, this series of cricket balls like a bowling machine.

• 50:34Speaker 03

  And I was like, well, that is an experience, you know, that's, that's something you don't get every day, but got it out, got it out, left it, left it in Africa.

• 50:41Speaker 02

  Keep it or delete it?

• 50:42Speaker 04

  I think if you keep it, you have to put it like, go back and put some disclaimer in that you listen with your own risk.

• 50:48Speaker 02

  It's either keep it or delete it. You've got to make a call. Keep it or delete it. What are you going with?

• 50:53Speaker 03

  Jack, it is a medical story and this happens to people and I, and I will never travel without one of those glycerine pellets now. I just can't go back through that. I don't know how it happened. It's never happened since, but just a word of warning for people. Keep your fibre up.

• 51:06Speaker 04

  Keep it. I'm deleted.

• 51:11Speaker 04

  You've got the final call.

• 51:12Speaker 03

  I don't know if I, I don't know. Does the person that tells it get?

• 51:15Speaker 04

  Yeah, it's just the three of us. We get to say.

• 51:18Speaker 03

  I think it's a medically important story.

• 51:30Speaker 02

  Another thing to tie off, which actually probably brings to end quite a saga, I reckon.

• 51:38Speaker 02

  This is a grab that it stems from midway through the year.

• 51:41Speaker 03

  This comes in from Jacinta and we've done that, we've looked into the health star ratings a few times on this show. We know there's some discrepancies and then some companies just mysteriously choose not to play. They just won't do the food star ratings.

• 51:55Speaker 04

  I have to admit, dimmies and titties.

• 51:58Speaker 03

  That's who it was for. That's what it was for. She found dimmies and titties dimmed since that Andy has a hand in it chooses not to play.

• 52:04Speaker 02

  This is not to play. You've got the hat on today.

• 52:07Speaker 03

  Famously famously said, I'll say what I want.

• 52:10Speaker 02

  Yes, it did lead to another song and that was off this particular moment. But, I mean, they're really good for you. Take my word for it.

• 52:21Speaker 03

  And just when we thought the health star system had question marks over it, now we've got Andy Lee five thumbs up.

• 52:26Speaker 02

  No, deliciously good for you.

• 52:29Speaker 03

  You can't say that.

• 52:31Speaker 03

  You can say delicious.

• 52:32Speaker 02

  I can say what I want, come on.

• 52:35Speaker 03

  I can say what I want, I'm not playing. Wow. Still throwing it out there.

• 52:40Speaker 02

  Guess what?

• 52:41Speaker 03

  What?

• 52:41Speaker 02

  Dimmies and titties have decided, did I say titties? Dimmies and titties.

• 52:45Speaker 03

  You can say what you want, mate. You've made that very clear.

• 52:49Speaker 02

  Dimmies and titties, D and T's dimmies have decided to play to learn about how you get the health star rating.

• 52:58Speaker 03

  Oh, to learn from the inside.

• 52:59Speaker 02

  To learn from the inside.

• 53:01Speaker 03

  Yeah, I'd love to know. Sorry, just to be clear, dimmies and, you're not, dimmies and titties, isn't that?

• 53:05Speaker 02

  No, no, that's not going to be a good spin.

• 53:09Speaker 03

  I thought that was the announcement.

• 53:11Speaker 02

  So it turns out, anyone can go to the website.

• 53:17Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 53:17Speaker 02

  Calculate their health star and then just choose to put it on their package.

• 53:21Speaker 03

  But how do you, don't you have to go to a lab or something to put?

• 53:24Speaker 02

  You have to do that anyway to put your nutritional value.

• 53:28Speaker 03

  Nutritional value, oh, it's based off your nutritional value.

• 53:30Speaker 02

  I'm going to send you that website now, Ham.

• 53:32Speaker 03

  Okay. Because I've long suspected it grossly penalizes you for saturated fat and it under, it doesn't really care too much about other things. Because remember, one of the big ones was the blue bubblegum flavoured milk.

• 53:49Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 53:49Speaker 03

  Was a four star health rating because I think they just made it like a, you know, they got rid of some of the saturated fat. And so I reckon saturated fat and sugar, it really pings you for.

• 53:59Speaker 02

  My insiders said you can game the system a little bit. So when you punch into the website, does it come back and say this is why you're getting a three stars or four stars? Or does it not give you that information?

• 54:10Speaker 03

  I don't know. I haven't done it yet. Oh, wow. You've never done it for dimmies and titties?

• 54:14Speaker 02

  No.

• 54:14Speaker 03

  We can do a live one.

• 54:16Speaker 02

  What if you get a half star?

• 54:17Speaker 03

  I guess we're choosing to play.

• 54:23Speaker 02

  All right. Oh, this is exciting.

• 54:25Speaker 03

  All right, I've clicked on it. Start calculation.

• 54:28Speaker 02

  Yes, start calculation.

• 54:29Speaker 03

  Um, what category are you in, Andy?

• 54:31Speaker 02

  I've been told here, I've got the instructions, two foods.

• 54:34Speaker 03

  Yep, click. Product information, company, Dimmies and Tinnies.

• 54:40Speaker 02

  It's Dimmies and Tinnies, not the spin off we just came up with just before.

• 54:45Speaker 03

  Product name.

• 54:45Speaker 02

  D and T's Dimmies. Now, I've got the nutritional information here, Ham, so you just tell me what we need first.

• 54:52Speaker 03

  Energy, kilojoules per hundred grams.

• 54:55Speaker 02

  Seven, five, six.

• 54:58Speaker 03

  It's not too bad. Saturated fat, grams per hundred grams.

• 55:01Speaker 02

  Saturated fat, two point seven.

• 55:04Speaker 03

  You're gonna do well. Total sugars, grams per hundred grams.

• 55:08Speaker 02

  Three point five. That's good.

• 55:10Speaker 03

  I know, he's gonna do very well. That's less than bloody cereal. Sodium.

• 55:15Speaker 02

  Five hundred and thirty four. I don't know whether these. Is that good enough?

• 55:19Speaker 03

  That's mil, that's, that's milligrams per hundred grams, but that's, yeah, I mean, that's probably, I mean, well, they're Dimmies, like, they're not low in salt, they're not known as a classically unsalty food. Okay, modifying point inputs. Oh, this is huge. These inputs calculate positive points that increase your rating. How much fibre do you have, grams per hundred grams?

• 55:39Speaker 02

  One point eight grams. Doesn't sound high.

• 55:43Speaker 03

  I could, I could have used it in Africa. Protein, protein grams per hundred grams.

• 55:48Speaker 02

  Seven point three.

• 55:50Speaker 03

  You could label that, but by, by some of the food labelling you see these days, you could label these as high protein snacks at seven percent, mate. They, if they're doing it for peanuts. Concentrated, uh, fruit and vegetables.

• 56:02Speaker 02

  Pass.

• 56:05Speaker 03

  Um, I can put zero. I don't know what this means, but F V N L?

• 56:09Speaker 02

  Pass.

• 56:11Speaker 03

  Oh, that's fruits, vegetables, nuts and legumes. Yeah, you don't have any of those in it. Yep. Okay.

• 56:16Speaker 02

  What's your guess, Jack? I reckon you go on four stars, four out of five.

• 56:19Speaker 03

  I, I reckon it's gonna be four.

• 56:21Speaker 02

  What is it, Ham, can it?

• 56:23Speaker 03

  Andy.

• 56:26Speaker 03

  You have received three stars.

• 56:31Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 56:32Speaker 03

  Pretty good.

• 56:33Speaker 02

  I'm gonna happy with that.

• 56:34Speaker 03

  I reckon, I reckon it's the sodium, I'm gonna halve it, okay?

• 56:37Speaker 02

  Okay, yeah, half the sodium.

• 56:39Speaker 03

  Yep, that takes up to three and a half stars.

• 56:41Speaker 02

  Mmm.

• 56:42Speaker 04

  Now chuck a bit more fibre in.

• 56:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, great, cool. If you can, let's see if you can triple the fibre to six grams. Ooh, four.

• 56:50Speaker 02

  Four.

• 56:51Speaker 03

  It's gonna kill you to pop a bit, why don't you put a bit of flaxseed or something through the dimmies? Make them high fibre dimmies.

• 56:56Speaker 02

  So is there, they said that there should be a button there that just says artwork and you click on it? It gives, it basically gives you the...

• 57:02Speaker 03

  Yeah, it does, it does, you just print it off.

• 57:04Speaker 02

  Print it off, then you just put it on your own. So it's self governed?

• 57:08Speaker 04

  So are you gonna play, at three stars is enough for you to play?

• 57:11Speaker 02

  Well, I'll play based on this, but...

• 57:13Speaker 03

  Well, who is going to ever police it? If you just put the wrong health star on, what government body is gonna go, we're pinging you for it?

• 57:22Speaker 02

  I asked this. She said it requires a customer complaint to cha- so someone can challenge.

• 57:28Speaker 04

  Oh, so you can roll with five stars all you want until you get challenged?

• 57:32Speaker 03

  I don't think people know they can challenge.

• 57:35Speaker 02

  You can challenge?

• 57:36Speaker 03

  Well, I also feel sorry for sour cream. I feel like challenging on behalf of them to go, I don't think you deserve...

• 57:40Speaker 02

  Half a star.

• 57:41Speaker 04

  Yeah, half a star.

• 57:42Speaker 03

  Point five always felt like the cruelest, because we're having a tiny dab. No one's eaten a bucket of sour cream as an afternoon snack.

• 57:50Speaker 02

  And then, that's when the government body comes in and says to you... Justify, apparently. But again, it requires someone challenging it to them.

• 58:03Speaker 03

  And I also reckon, how big a government department are we talking here? I reckon they're probably just stretched to the limit.

• 58:08Speaker 02

  Absolutely.

• 58:09Speaker 03

  If they come back and they go justify and you go, yeah, yeah, we, we took pains to lower the salt and increase the fibre. You know, feel free to come and spend 50 grand testing it if you want, they'll be like, nah, nah, you're, you're good.

• 58:21Speaker 04

  So, are you gonna play honestly or do you wanna play cheekily?

• 58:25Speaker 03

  Tempted to play cheekily.

• 58:27Speaker 02

  Do a cheeky one.

• 58:27Speaker 04

  Do a cheeky, do one flavour as a five stars and just see if it changes.

• 58:32Speaker 03

  I will look into what the punishment is. What if you do, I don't think I'm half of the company, I'm gonna go...

• 58:37Speaker 02

  Boo.

• 58:47Speaker 03

  Final loose end, Jack. And this was a surprise for Hame and I, but was captured. So now we'll play it to you. So it'll be a surprise for you and everyone listening.

• 58:59Speaker 02

  This moment.

• 59:00Speaker 03

  But Jez asked to meet up with us.

• 59:02Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 59:03Speaker 03

  And was very serious in tone.

• 59:06Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 59:06Speaker 03

  WebGees and Jez, not known for his serious chats. I didn't know if I was getting fired. I didn't know what was going on. He was like, I wanted, can I have a meeting with you guys? And do you mind if I record it? It's like, I'll be honest. I was like, that sounds legal.

• 59:21Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 59:21Speaker 03

  But okay, sure, Jez. Yeah, no worries.

• 59:24Speaker 02

  I thought maybe he was leaving and I don't know why he wanted to capture that.

• 59:29Speaker 04

  So he asked if he could record the chat.

• 59:33Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 59:34Speaker 03

  And so, yeah, we were like, later on, in case we just deny that he left, that we don't let him leave. I have evidence of me saying I'm leaving. But the good news is for people that, and WebGees and Jez is beloved to the team. He isn't leaving. It was a good news meeting.

• 59:47Speaker 02

  And this is how it went.

• 59:50Speaker 05

  So I just got a little piece of paper for you guys. That's got something on it.

• 59:56Speaker 02

  Oh my God.

• 59:59Speaker 02

  He found the Bitcoin password.

• 1:00:00Speaker 03

  You got it.

• 1:00:01Speaker 05

  Anthony.

• 1:00:01Speaker 02

  He found it.

• 1:00:03Speaker 03

  Does that mean we have to give him 50%?

• 1:00:05Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:00:06Speaker 03

  He's just found it for us.

• 1:00:08Speaker 02

  He just said it.

• 1:00:08Speaker 03

  I'm sorry to turn into Jack immediately.

• 1:00:12Speaker 02

  No, Anthony, out of the goodness of his heart, said, guys, an adventure. I found this for you. How long did it take?

• 1:00:20Speaker 05

  Because one is the people's Bitcoin and one's your Bitcoin.

• 1:00:24Speaker 02

  And we were just going to give him the peoples. And he said, no, it should be the peoples.

• 1:00:27Speaker 03

  Oh my God.

• 1:00:29Speaker 02

  How did he find it?

• 1:00:30Speaker 05

  So it was, he ran, so we had David in 2021. Have a go. And so he was running like quite a lot per second brute force. But then Anthony could run up to a billion per second.

• 1:00:44Speaker 03

  Combos.

• 1:00:44Speaker 05

  Combos. And so my first Zoom call.

• 1:00:47Speaker 02

  So I've held on to this since you put me in, we got in touch.

• 1:00:50Speaker 03

  Oh my gosh.

• 1:00:51Speaker 02

  Jesus. I've got, I've got, I know, it was insane.

• 1:00:55Speaker 03

  But people have a Bitcoin?

• 1:00:57Speaker 02

  The weight off the shoulders.

• 1:00:58Speaker 03

  What are we gonna do with this?

• 1:01:00Speaker 02

  You must feel so happy.

• 1:01:03Speaker 03

  I never thought this day would come.

• 1:01:05Speaker 02

  I know. Like, I remember still, like, 2017 was when I said I've lost it.

• 1:01:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:01:10Speaker 02

  And then this was, yeah.

• 1:01:12Speaker 03

  We can't say what the password is.

• 1:01:13Speaker 02

  The weight off my shoulder was crazy.

• 1:01:14Speaker 03

  We can't say what the password is, but if you listen back to the hypnotist and how close did you get during hypnosis?

• 1:01:19Speaker 02

  So, yeah, I was off. And what was interesting about it?

• 1:01:23Speaker 03

  Which doesn't surprise me, because like, if you can just hypnotize passwords out of people. So we have two Bitcoins?

• 1:01:28Speaker 02

  Two Bitcoins?

• 1:01:28Speaker 03

  One for the people, one for, yeah, for mum and dad.

• 1:01:32Speaker 02

  And it's locked away. It's like 100%. So I, I went in with, with Anthony and we found it and it was, so. So how long did it take him? It took him like a, like a fraction of a second. Like, so, so.

• 1:01:44Speaker 03

  Okay, I'm just saying, I've got it. I've got it.

• 1:01:46Speaker 02

  Yeah. So what I did was, I had one Zoom call. So one, I had one Zoom call with him and it took like 45 minutes. We're running heaps of options. And then I was like, I, I, in passing, I said, like, he was trying to say, what passwords do you see? So I was like, oh, **** was one of them. But I'll give you a bunch. And then I gave him a bu, like, I didn't even have time to give him a bunch. He was like, within 20 minutes of the Zoom call ending, he was like, Jez, jump back on. And jumped back on and he was like, I ran variations of ****. And with, in 196,000 variations of a billion, it was how many runs he got it. And it was like, and it basically was ****. So it was like.

• 1:02:27Speaker 03

  Are we, I mean, but is it still that?

• 1:02:30Speaker 02

  No, I've changed it since.

• 1:02:32Speaker 03

  Have we just lost it?

• 1:02:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah. I've done all the correct things now. Like, I've got two backups and all that stuff. Unbelievable. And it's all, it's all there for you. Unbelievable.

• 1:02:42Speaker 03

  Sorry, I was just, I was just like, hang on, hang on, just stop, stop talking, stop saying the password. Man.

• 1:02:48Speaker 02

  This is incredible.

• 1:02:51Speaker 03

  So we're coming back next year. Like, I think, cause it's so close to the end of the year now, it's like, let's just think about this.

• 1:02:57Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 1:02:57Speaker 03

  But we're coming back, unless the price of Bitcoin craters over Christmas and we have to come back and go, oh god, we should have sold it last year. But we're coming back next year with a Bitcoin to shower upon the people.

• 1:03:09Speaker 02

  Yeah. Let's just call it the moment, 150 grand to somehow give back to the people.

• 1:03:16Speaker 03

  Huge. Jack. Wild. Huge. Wow. I mean, just to see your face there was priceless because we could have just, you know, recapped quickly for people, of course, you know, WebGez at Jez. What year was it? 2014 or something? 13. Where I was like, hey, we should buy some Bitcoin. They were $900 each, if I remember correctly. So we will need that 900 back off the people.

• 1:03:46Speaker 03

  But they were $900 each. Now again, and then Jez, like a few years later was like, I'm so sorry, I've lost it. And hilarity ensued. He felt terrible for someone and we kept trying to say to Jez, like, you can't actually feel that bad. He didn't lose us $300,000. We were trying desperately to sell the Bitcoin when it was at 1400. To buy a convertible. To buy a convertible sub. So we could drive it to a car wash, yeah. So that's when we discovered that we'd lost it. So really, Jez, through his lax security measures, has made us a fortune. Huge.

• 1:04:18Speaker 02

  The best type of investment.

• 1:04:21Speaker 02

  Gross negligent one.

• 1:04:22Speaker 03

  The gross negligence has ended up in gross celebrations because the people now have a Bitcoin.

• 1:04:28Speaker 02

  We have to thank Anthony, of course.

• 1:04:31Speaker 03

  And what a legend.

• 1:04:32Speaker 02

  He did, too, is at FindYourCrypto, but if anyone else.

• 1:04:36Speaker 03

  Boy, has he got a good track record on this show.

• 1:04:38Speaker 02

  Yeah, two from two in trouble. But, I mean, yeah, we'll have to think about it over the summer, but we have to give.

• 1:04:44Speaker 03

  We should have guesses.

• 1:04:46Speaker 02

  Bitcoin worth to the people.

• 1:04:48Speaker 03

  We're going to spend it, we're going to lavish it, lavish it upon the people. I love it. Wow. Some way. Everyone thinking hats on, people they can email in to over the summer, like, what, over the mandated break, what, what can we do with the Bitcoin next year? Should we take a guess, a hamish, handy Jack guess, at what we think the price will be when we come back?

• 1:05:08Speaker 02

  First show next year.

• 1:05:09Speaker 03

  Boom over the government mandated break? Is it going to dip? I'm going to go bullish at 180.

• 1:05:15Speaker 02

  I'll go 200. I think it's going to settle at 167.

• 1:05:21Speaker 02

  AUD?

• 1:05:23Speaker 04

  What do we do with it?

• 1:05:25Speaker 02

  Well, what do we do?

• 1:05:26Speaker 03

  We were thinking, Jack, do we do like, do we, do we do a raffle where it's like one ticket to you, one ticket to me?

• 1:05:33Speaker 04

  Surely my luck's run out now from raffles on the show.

• 1:05:36Speaker 03

  Wouldn't you be, would you be annoyed to like, well, you know, you did get the golf card.

• 1:05:42Speaker 03

  You used your luck up on that raffle.

• 1:05:45Speaker 02

  What we have spent $350 on is the usage rights to a BG song.

• 1:05:51Speaker 03

  We thought it realistically, because next year, make it understand, the Bitcoin will be big next year.

• 1:05:57Speaker 02

  Big news.

• 1:05:58Speaker 03

  Like, whatever we do with the Bitcoins is gonna be huge, and it can only have happened because of Anthony. This tech wizard, like, what a legend, fan of the show, alert listener of the show, reached out off his own account.

• 1:06:09Speaker 02

  We should give him an eight coin coin.

• 1:06:11Speaker 03

  We're gonna give him an eight coin coin, which is huge as well. So I think.

• 1:06:15Speaker 02

  Great service.

• 1:06:16Speaker 03

  I think it's a good even swap there.

• 1:06:18Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:06:18Speaker 03

  Um, but we, we're just like, we, I feel like we've got to finish this, this episode.

• 1:06:23Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:06:24Speaker 03

  With a thank you to Anthony and what he's done for the people.

• 1:06:28Speaker 02

  Off the back of this, we'll be, uh, Burg Boys next week and the end of the year. But we'll leave you with this. Thanks.

• 1:06:38Speaker 03

  Two Bitcoins, lost and lonely and all alone.

• 1:06:46Speaker 03

  Trapped by tech, no one's ever cracked it yet.

• 1:06:54Speaker 03

  Then Anthony said, hey, boys, can you give it to me? Just pray to God, could he come through? He come through, let it be true, could he come through? Anthony, Anthony. When your password's gone and you can't go on, call Anthony. You've had a million tries and a big, big cry, you looked everywhere. Even hypnosis has got you nowhere.

• 1:07:29Speaker 03

  But Anthony, not sure how to do cyclic well with Anthony. With your hip on your side, you can say goodbye to remembering passwords. Cause Anthony's the best and he'll just do the.

• 1:07:51Speaker 01

  Thanks for listening. The Hamish and Andy podcast will return next week. Catch up or contribute at hamishandandy.com.