Pod Insights Hamish & Andy 2025 Ep 318 - The Great Trivia Heist About this episode Andy compares the number of contacts he and the boys have in their phones, leading them to dive into their Uber stats. A sneaky loophole in the mandated break is uncovered, prompting the announcement of Hamish & Andy Plus+ and the very festive Quizmas Time, coming this December. Magic Mike absolves himself of a trivia scam before his debut as Trivia Master. Hamish revisits peak free-to-air TV in the ’90s and early 2000s. Plus, the final Gusto Check of the year!
1. Optometrist gusto check
2. Uber stats
3. Quizmas Time with Magic Mike
4. 90’s TV
Transcript 0:02 Speaker 00 A Listener Production.
0:07 Speaker 01 Activate your internet because the Hamish and Andy podcast starts in three, two...
0:17 Speaker 01 Sorry, still buffering. One.
0:23 Speaker 02 Ahoy to me Rockafour, Hamish.
0:26 Speaker 03 Oh, we are smelly cheeses.
0:31 Speaker 02 We are smelly cheeses.
0:34 Speaker 03 Who's Jack?
0:35 Speaker 02 Cabralas is how I say it. Cabralas, it's a Spanish one. And then I was a Gorgonzola. Is this my smelly cheese official category?
0:44 Speaker 03 Well, here's the distinction. Blue cheese aged in natural caves.
0:52 Speaker 02 Okay.
0:52 Speaker 03 Really?
0:52 Speaker 02 Yeah.
0:53 Speaker 03 Yeah. And that gives it a waft.
0:55 Speaker 02 That gives, yeah, so natural limestone for the Rockafour, for yours, the Cabralas. Often sheep's milk as well is the other point they make because that gives it the extra stinkiness.
1:04 Speaker 03 Extra tang.
1:05 Speaker 02 But yours, your cave's in northern Spain, Jaco, and I was the world's oldest blues cheese, the Gorgonzola, northern Italy. You're...
1:14 Speaker 03 From France.
1:15 Speaker 02 It seems so unsafe, like animals would...
1:17 Speaker 03 Northern Italy, yeah, sorry. Hamish, you're obviously family. I was French.
1:21 Speaker 02 Sorry, I was gonna say your family would have...
1:22 Speaker 03 Oh, sorry, that's why I didn't understand what you're saying because I'm one of Sicilian, from the south. So we would have, of course, been at war back in the Great Italian Cheese Wars. We would have been mortal enemies.
1:34 Speaker 02 What, what?
1:34 Speaker 03 The Gorgonzola clan.
1:35 Speaker 02 What cheese would you have been running in it? What would it be? Cheese specific to Sicily since you're so...
1:40 Speaker 03 Cheese specific to Sicily. We are more, we like milk. We just, we just don't let it turn into cheese. We're milk fans. We were greedy pigs. We'd sometimes do a cream, but we'd never let it get to cheese state. Too hot, too hot.
1:55 Speaker 02 Ahoy also to Ellie, who went to haymishandandy.com to let us know what she's been up to.
2:00 Speaker 04 Hello boys, Ellie here. I would like to use this message to give a shout out to my high school music teacher, Mr Drew. Because before every music class, he would read us one power move from the Hamish and Andy Power Moves book. Now, a few years on from high school, I can't say I've retained too much music theory knowledge, but I carry the art of the power move into every interaction in my life. So I want to say thank you, Mr Drew, for giving me the greatest gift an educator can give. And I also want to say that I hope that I live to see the day when power moves are taught throughout all schools in Australia. Thank you.
2:37 Speaker 03 What a voice of the future.
2:39 Speaker 02 Wasn't it great? Did sound like a presentation assembly as well.
2:42 Speaker 03 I mean, and full marks, full colours, full colour for her. And also to the, I mean, you know, what a teacher. Doing the world's most important job, teaching the world's most important stuff. Win, win.
2:52 Speaker 02 I think there are some power moves books still available at haymishandandy.com.
2:56 Speaker 03 Yes, if you are abutting, Mr Drew, if you too would like to have that level of respect from your students.
3:02 Speaker 02 Rob's a man, man addition, I think.
3:04 Speaker 03 To the website.
3:06 Speaker 02 Uh, Haym, we want to start today with this.
3:19 Speaker 02 True. We sure are. We sure are. Interesting case today. Yes, today's comes from Mila. She joins us now. Ahoy to you, Mila.
3:28 Speaker 05 Ahoy, boys. Have you had the Andy?
3:30 Speaker 02 Uh, don't actually celebrate it, but thank you for going to haymishandandy.com and alerting us to the situation you're in. Haym, do you want to summarize?
3:39 Speaker 03 Um, so Mila, as far as I can tell from your case here, you were working for your dad at his optometrist tree. Is it a shop? Is it a clinic? Do they sell glasses?
3:49 Speaker 05 Yeah, he does a bit of both. He's the optometrist there. Um, they sell glasses. I was working for him. Um. Before I went overseas for a couple of months. And then I thought I was coming back to a job. But I looked on his website before I left and he had made a little blog post saying, um, we'll see her later. She's no longer working with us. She, we may see her around. She'd be need a helping hand over the summer. And I said, Dad, I thought I was coming back to a job, but apparently not.
4:18 Speaker 02 And you've been replaced.
4:19 Speaker 03 You've been replaced.
4:20 Speaker 02 Who have they replaced you with? Do you know the person they replaced you with?
4:23 Speaker 05 Yeah, I do. A family friend. So can't be too salty with her, but just a little bit.
4:28 Speaker 02 What's her name?
4:29 Speaker 05 Laura.
4:30 Speaker 02 Laura.
4:30 Speaker 03 Gotcha.
4:31 Speaker 02 So we've got to just essentially ring and assess whether she has more gusto than you and whether the replacement has been a good one for your.
4:39 Speaker 05 Yeah.
4:40 Speaker 03 If, when we do this customer service check, if she comes back with a good rating, will you just go, okay, it's, you know, the business is in safe hands? Or does she need to like shoot the lights out here?
4:52 Speaker 05 Um. I prefer her to be amazing.
4:55 Speaker 03 Yeah.
4:55 Speaker 05 But I'll forgive if it's okay.
4:58 Speaker 03 Okay, okay, okay.
4:59 Speaker 02 All right. Well, we obviously always judge someone on their greeting, how they, um, they, they greet you on the phone. Then, Hame, you'll have to ask a question. It's how helpful they are. What type of question do you want to do? Do you want to ask whether they?
5:11 Speaker 03 What do we do with like, what's the? Yeah. Or do you guys like, you know, should I come in and get a test or?
5:17 Speaker 02 Yeah, that's nice.
5:18 Speaker 03 Um.
5:18 Speaker 05 Yeah.
5:18 Speaker 03 What's your best frame?
5:20 Speaker 05 Yeah, that's a good one.
5:21 Speaker 03 What's your most popular frame? Is that a good one? What else would someone ask you, Neil? Like?
5:25 Speaker 02 I like, would you, should I come in and get a test here?
5:28 Speaker 05 Or like, yeah, why should I come to Simon? Cause he's the only one there.
5:32 Speaker 02 Yeah.
5:33 Speaker 03 Great. And what about, I have a round head. What kind of frame would suit me?
5:37 Speaker 02 Yeah, that's nice.
5:38 Speaker 03 Kind of thing she would handle?
5:39 Speaker 05 Okay, she should know that.
5:40 Speaker 02 Yeah, great. You do have a round head.
5:44 Speaker 03 The, um.
5:44 Speaker 02 Not too round, but I'm happy to play along.
5:48 Speaker 03 And then the goodbye. Okay, Jack, you and I and Hame will be all going through our scores straight after the call. Um, Mila, we're going to put you on hold, but you'll be out of here. Um, Hame, have you got everything you need? We're going with how are you? Um, do you do eye tests there? Cause my vision's finding it hard to read small print. Yeah. Why should I come in to see Simon? Then why should I come and see Simon? And then I've a round head. What's the best kind of frame for me? Yeah. And then, okay, think about coming in this afternoon. Great. Okay, here we go.
6:30 Speaker 00 Simon Clark, optometrist Laura speaking.
6:32 Speaker 03 Oh, good afternoon. Um, my name's Tono. How are you going?
6:35 Speaker 00 Thank you. What can I do for you?
6:36 Speaker 03 Um, I'm having a bit of trouble reading small print and I was wondering if I should come and get my eyes checked.
6:44 Speaker 00 Yeah, for sure. And so at the moment, our optometrist is currently away on holidays. He won't be back until next Wednesday.
6:52 Speaker 03 Mm hmm. Okay.
6:53 Speaker 00 Um, so we'd have to book him in for after that.
6:56 Speaker 03 That's fine. Um, just weighing up the difference between a few optometrists. Why should I come and see Simon?
7:03 Speaker 00 Uh, it's a very like connected practice because it is a private practice. So he really knows everybody individually. And he puts a lot of effort into everyone individually because he's only seeing, like he's seeing everyone. It's only him here. Um, we're a very small team, so it's very like connected. Yeah, and it's a very good environment and he's very, um, like suggested by a lot of doctors and things to come, for people to come and see him. We get a lot of referrals here.
7:31 Speaker 03 Well, I like the sounds of that. Um, I, I have quite a round head. What frame would you suggest for a rounder head?
7:40 Speaker 00 Oh, it really depends on what you like. Like we've got lots of different ones. Um, a lot of time people go with more square a frame. I noticed to the kind of like is the opposite, I guess.
7:55 Speaker 03 Yeah, round head square frame. Yep.
7:57 Speaker 00 Yeah, really just depends what feels good on you. But we've got so many options, so.
8:02 Speaker 03 Appreciate that.
8:02 Speaker 00 No stress there. Yeah.
8:04 Speaker 03 Oh, you've been very helpful. How long have you worked there?
8:07 Speaker 00 Um, only about a couple of months since June, I think.
8:10 Speaker 03 Enjoying your time?
8:12 Speaker 05 Yeah, I am. It is really good.
8:14 Speaker 03 Oh, great. Okay. Well, I'll, um, I'll have a think about it. I might call you back and make a booking for next week.
8:20 Speaker 05 Yeah, nice, Jess. We'll see you then.
8:21 Speaker 03 Good on you.
8:22 Speaker 05 Bye.
8:24 Speaker 02 Oh, well done, Hame.
8:26 Speaker 03 Pretty good.
8:26 Speaker 02 Well done. Gee, it's interesting, isn't it? It's interesting as we go through the scores because you don't want too much gusto for an optometrist.
8:35 Speaker 03 No, you're right. It would, it would, it could verge on, you know, something's up. Like, you've got to come in. You've just got to, we can't, we've got to fix those eyes of yours. I could put you on the back foot.
8:45 Speaker 02 Let's start with greeting. What score did you give for greeting, Jack?
8:49 Speaker 06 I only gave a six out of 10. I felt she warmed up after that.
8:52 Speaker 02 Yeah. Mila, how do you feel about her greeting? We, I, Jack and I have both given her six. Hame, were you in that kind of realm?
8:57 Speaker 03 Six? Yeah, it's tough to, I mean, I was in, I was too busy on court returning the serve. I wasn't thinking about what was going on too much. But yeah, I remember at the start feeling like we had to work a bit harder to get a bit of a rapport going.
9:09 Speaker 02 Mila, were you happy with the greeting?
9:11 Speaker 05 I was worried at the start, but I think she did improve.
9:15 Speaker 02 You, would you say you greet better? Like if we were going through certain quarters of the call, the first quarter, you would have Laura covered?
9:22 Speaker 05 Oh, definitely.
9:23 Speaker 02 Yeah, I think so. Um, then Hame, it was the why should I come in and see Simon? I gave a nine.
9:28 Speaker 06 Yeah, I gave an eight out of a 10, but could have given a nine. She really improved.
9:31 Speaker 03 The detail was huge. The only points I thought I'd have is it felt like we, you know, almost went over the same ground, but she sold it well. What did you think, Mila?
9:40 Speaker 05 Well, yeah, I think she was okay here all the spots.
9:44 Speaker 02 Okay. So what do you, what would you give it out of? Replace Hame's column here with yours. What would you give her out of 10 then for the why come and see Simon, your dad?
9:53 Speaker 05 Um, she can get an eight, maybe.
9:55 Speaker 02 Okay, yep.
9:56 Speaker 06 I like the part where she said he's highly respected by a lot of doctors. That sounds like a high gusto optometrist.
10:02 Speaker 03 Yep.
10:03 Speaker 05 Oh, totally. He's got a lot of gusto himself as well. Too bad he's not there for you to check in.
10:08 Speaker 02 Okay.
10:10 Speaker 03 Uh, round on holidays too. He might get replaced via board post.
10:14 Speaker 02 Round end discussion.
10:17 Speaker 02 Round head discussion. Um, Jack, what do you go with? I gave her seven out of 10. Really? I thought it was a nine. She was, I felt she was polite. I don't think she really shared too much information on your
10:29 Speaker 03 It's a pretty tough question for someone to go, I'm a bit, I'm a round head. What frame would I get? I mean, wild if she said, I know exactly the frame for you and I won't take no for an answer. I was surprised she went specific and said, I think I'd put you in a bit more of a square.
10:42 Speaker 02 Mila, your thoughts?
10:43 Speaker 03 Because my brother has a round head and he has square glasses.
10:50 Speaker 05 Um, I wouldn't have known how to answer that question. So I think she did great.
10:54 Speaker 02 Yeah. Would you, what are you saying? Nine, eight, seven?
10:56 Speaker 05 Yeah, probably eight or nine.
10:59 Speaker 02 Okay.
10:59 Speaker 03 Now, I put the bit at the end in sort of for you, Mila, um, was, you know, the, do you like working there? How long has it been?
11:07 Speaker 02 Hoping that she didn't like it. So then you might get your job back.
11:11 Speaker 03 I thought she might've said, you know, I was like, is it too obvious if I go, I've, I came in a few months ago and I saw a different girl there and she seemed lovely. Who was that? Like, I didn't want to go too far down there, but did you feel like it sounded like she was enjoying her job?
11:24 Speaker 05 I think she sounded quite at peace that she's stolen my job. Yeah.
11:31 Speaker 02 Jack, what did you give her for the goodbye? I gave her an eight out of 10 for the goodbye. Seven for me. Just, um, yeah.
11:37 Speaker 03 Wasn't, it didn't flow perfectly.
11:39 Speaker 02 Yeah. And I felt I could have been a look forward to seeing you then, a little bit more like.
11:43 Speaker 03 Yeah, we can't wait.
11:44 Speaker 02 Well, he hadn't, he hadn't booked. I know, but you can still.
11:47 Speaker 03 When you dial it up to 10, if someone's saying, I'll think about calling back, you say, well, we really look forward to talking to you. Because I think you're going to be very happy with Simon Clarke.
11:58 Speaker 02 Is that what you would have done, Mila? Mila?
11:59 Speaker 05 Oh yeah, I would have really tried to entice them back for sure.
12:03 Speaker 02 What would you like to give Laura out of 10 for that then?
12:05 Speaker 05 Um, I think she can get a six at the end.
12:08 Speaker 03 Yeah, yeah, that's interesting. That's really interesting. Okay, Andy, you've got the spreadsheet.
12:13 Speaker 02 I've got the scores. She's got a 30. Um, uh, I averaged all our scores across the back. So she's got a 30 out of a possible 40. So 75.
12:23 Speaker 03 That's, that's big.
12:24 Speaker 02 Yeah. I think that's pretty good.
12:26 Speaker 03 That is possible. That's not blowing the roof off, but that is, I think we'd have to say that is good gusto.
12:31 Speaker 02 Hmm.
12:31 Speaker 05 I won't come steal her job back. I think she deserves it.
12:35 Speaker 03 Are you happy to accept the ruling, Mila?
12:37 Speaker 05 Yeah, that's what I feel in my heart.
12:40 Speaker 03 Thank you. Thank you very much.
12:42 Speaker 02 Well, you've taken it well. And just as a sign off, imagine you were, if it's okay if this is not too traumatic, but imagine you were back at the shop. Can you take us out by what, how you would tell a customer that's maybe gonna make a booking, how you'd sign off to them?
12:59 Speaker 05 Okay. Well, we're so excited to hear from you. Just give us a call when you can. See ya.
13:05 Speaker 02 Ten out of ten. Yeah, ten, ten. That's a ten. Are you gonna be an asset to wherever you go next? I'll, I'll tell you that.
13:12 Speaker 02 Thanks, me a lot.
13:13 Speaker 05 See you, guys.
13:19 Speaker 02 Sitting around with my mates at the pub, and the question came up, how many contacts do you have in your phone? So I just, if you go to your phones, guys, I just wanted to see.
13:30 Speaker 03 Tons.
13:30 Speaker 02 I'm, I'm good at clearing out. Really? Non exist, yeah, things I don't use. Really? Fine. I've got so many, like, I could just randomly go to any letter. I would, I've got thousands. I mean, I've just got, but I've, I'll just have things like, um, does it say? Yeah, go to the very bottom of your contacts list. Or if you just go back to lists within contacts, it'll tell you all. 1,102. 1,102.
13:57 Speaker 03 No, I have so many more. I just saw, I just saw a guy who we hired as a person, who's the personal trainer, that helped me when I was trying to lose weight after we stole the suit from Channel 7 in 2007. So I could fit into the suit. So, sorry. I have not that many, 1,687.
14:17 Speaker 02 One, yeah, okay. I've got 2,866.
14:21 Speaker 03 Yep. You're always picking up details, though.
14:24 Speaker 02 My mate Ross, when we're going around, he's a bit of a no fuss guy.
14:29 Speaker 03 I reckon he'd have like 300.
14:32 Speaker 02 168. Wow. That's minimal. And then we were like, whoa, everyone was in the thousands, like between 1,000 and 3,000. I would see some people are real estate agents and stuff, and they've got heaps more.
14:43 Speaker 03 That doesn't surprise me for Ross, monk-like. Like, that's, that's kind of the, that's a modern day monk, where it's sort of like, back in the days, a monk might only speak to one person. I think the modern day equivalent is less than 200.
14:54 Speaker 02 So we're in shock. We're going, Pezza, that's incredible. He goes, I could get it down to 30 before the end of the night.
15:01 Speaker 03 He could, he could.
15:03 Speaker 02 So it sent us into Uber.
15:05 Speaker 03 Yeah.
15:06 Speaker 02 And we wanted to establish how many trips and how many Uber eats we've got. So I've sent you guys the instructions to go into Uber.
15:14 Speaker 03 Yep. There's a, there's a way you can get into your privacy settings and get a summary. I've never seen this before, but you can get your data as an Uber user to see. I won't give you any of those, I won't give you the stats yet, but I, I've been with Uber for 4,647 days.
15:31 Speaker 02 4,651 days. I must have told you.
15:35 Speaker 03 You probably told me about it.
15:36 Speaker 02 Four days.
15:36 Speaker 03 I was like, I don't think this is gonna last. Oh, is that, do we have that in Australia? No, use it. I used it the other night. It'd probably flame out.
15:44 Speaker 02 Jacko, how long have you been with Uber?
15:46 Speaker 06 4,175 days. So you guys are keeping that in your back pocket.
15:50 Speaker 02 Why didn't you tell me?
15:52 Speaker 03 No, because it costs money and you're probably like, oh, I'll Uber with you guys.
15:58 Speaker 02 Okay. What's your rating? What's your, what's your ride rating? I mean, and okay, who do you think's got the highest out of the three?
16:04 Speaker 06 I think you've got the highest, Andy.
16:06 Speaker 03 Yep. Cause you instigated the game.
16:08 Speaker 02 No.
16:08 Speaker 03 4.86 for me.
16:10 Speaker 02 Jacko?
16:10 Speaker 06 4.71.
16:12 Speaker 02 Oh. 4.83, Hamish gets the win.
16:17 Speaker 02 What are you doing to get?
16:18 Speaker 03 I'm a delight. I'm just a delight.
16:20 Speaker 02 Are you massaging the guys?
16:22 Speaker 03 I'm just interested, interested in their life.
16:24 Speaker 02 Yep.
16:24 Speaker 03 Um, but if they want no conversation, I respect that.
16:28 Speaker 02 That's not their choice. That's usually the rider's choice. So Jack, what do you think you're doing so wrong?
16:32 Speaker 06 I think I can, I cancel a bit to get a, like a better time.
16:37 Speaker 02 Right.
16:38 Speaker 06 Which is, I know is frowned upon.
16:40 Speaker 02 I don't think you get rated on.
16:41 Speaker 03 I don't think they can find you to rate you after that.
16:43 Speaker 06 It's only on the trips. So you're doing something during the trip they're not loving, mate. But only by point one of a difference.
16:50 Speaker 03 It's a big difference. That's a, that is a, I mean, 4.7 is close to being banned.
16:55 Speaker 02 You get kicked off at 4.5.
16:56 Speaker 06 Do you really?
16:57 Speaker 02 Yeah. So you're over halfway.
16:59 Speaker 06 Wow. So I'm closer definitely to being kicked off than staying.
17:02 Speaker 03 Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's weird. The, the Uber rating system is not like, say, comedy festival shows.
17:08 Speaker 02 No.
17:08 Speaker 03 Like, it's not like, well, you're out of the festival if you get less than four and a half stars.
17:15 Speaker 02 Okay, let's move down to how many trips you've taken, Hame?
17:21 Speaker 03 I have taken 615 trips. I'd say a low to medium amount, not crazy.
17:26 Speaker 06 211.
17:27 Speaker 02 1,042.
17:29 Speaker 06 Wow.
17:30 Speaker 02 So, I mean, maybe a bigger sample size for you, Jack, will help out your rating.
17:36 Speaker 06 Yeah, yeah, the more I ride, the more.
17:38 Speaker 03 I think if you do, if you just focus this summer on taking 100 perfect trips, you could, you could get that rating up.
17:46 Speaker 02 How many Uber Eats orders? This is where I think, Hame, if you were to guess, Jacko, you'd say Hame will win this one, don't you?
17:52 Speaker 06 I would think so.
17:53 Speaker 03 I don't know, because you've got to remember, half the time, Zoe would be ordering it.
17:56 Speaker 02 Oh, okay. Yeah, okay. Interesting.
17:59 Speaker 03 So I'm only 198.
18:01 Speaker 06 Wow, okay. 273. 142. And even that shocks me. That's, that feels high.
18:08 Speaker 03 198 feels low for me, but I, but I reckon Zoe kind of leaked because it's always on her phone because I don't care.
18:14 Speaker 02 Yes, she's.
18:16 Speaker 03 And also, she needs to see it on the screen.
18:20 Speaker 02 Yeah.
18:20 Speaker 03 Like, if, if I was like, all right, I'm getting Uber Eats, and if she's throwing words at me and I go, yep, got it.
18:25 Speaker 02 She doesn't trust.
18:26 Speaker 03 She's like, no, need to see it.
18:27 Speaker 02 Yeah.
18:28 Speaker 03 Like, okay, we just do it on your phone. Cause I, when I say to you, I'll have a burrito, I trust that you've written that.
18:35 Speaker 03 She just not trust that I've written mine. How are you going to hers to be in the four, 500s?
18:38 Speaker 02 So as we went around the room, we got to Ross, we got to Pezza, who, as I remind you, had 161 contacts.
18:48 Speaker 02 Once. He's ordered Uber Eats.
18:52 Speaker 03 And as former Uber Eats ambassadors, guys that did the ad, I hope you found out why he had such a bad experience. That is a guy that was like, I'm not doing this again.
19:03 Speaker 06 I think he did it once to support us, yeah.
19:06 Speaker 03 During the campaign, just to show a bump. Hamish Andy and Leighton Hewitt, that is a powerful, powerful ad and it's convinced me.
19:14 Speaker 02 What did he get? Does he remember?
19:15 Speaker 03 And why did, what, how could you possibly have an experience with delivery food and go, no, I prefer to drive to the shops? I don't know how you could not enjoy, and I'm not, this is not, this is, this would go for all delivery services. I'm not saying Uber Eats is special here, but how could you go, I prefer the old system of calling up the fish and chip shop, going down and waiting for it?
19:37 Speaker 06 Scroll down a bit and you can also click on that ratings and I can see the breakdown of five stars, four stars, three stars.
19:44 Speaker 03 Yeah, I can see it now.
19:44 Speaker 06 So I've had 186 five star reviews, but I've had six one star reviews. I would love to know, it should put an option so you know what you did wrong.
19:54 Speaker 03 Follow up this driver. It should charge you a fee because they don't want to talk to you again, Jack. You're their worst customer they've ever had.
19:59 Speaker 06 No, but I want to hear their feedback. What did I do wrong?
20:02 Speaker 03 No, but you should have to pay a fee, like a $10 fee, you know what I mean? For them to go, okay, I'll, I'll talk to him.
20:09 Speaker 02 What about?
20:10 Speaker 03 How are you going, Ando, for the one stars?
20:12 Speaker 02 Nine.
20:13 Speaker 03 Nine? I'm seven. What fascinates me is two two star reviews for me.
20:19 Speaker 02 I had four two stars, so I'm not sure.
20:22 Speaker 03 But a two star review is so interesting because you just think they should all be ones and fives, maybe a four in there, but to go two. So he was a jerk, but there was one redeeming moment. There was one redeeming moment to bump me up to a two.
20:37 Speaker 02 But I've met bigger jerks.
20:40 Speaker 03 Jack guy from the other week.
20:41 Speaker 02 What it should be divided into is time of day for the ride. Cause I just wonder whether your one stars are coming post midnight.
20:51 Speaker 03 Like you're, so you're sloppy or, because no, I reckon, I also think there should be, you should be in the driver's, sorry, in the passenger's favour. It should go, how long has the driver been driving? If the driver's been driving for more than 10 hours that day, a one star review shouldn't count because then I think they're, they're the cranky ones. They're the cranky ones. And now you're dragging me down because you're having a bad day.
21:21 Speaker 02 Hey, an exciting announcement for us. Huge loophole we've managed to find in the government mandated break is that we are allowed to release another podcast as long as it's not weekly and it's fully pre-recorded.
21:34 Speaker 03 And it's not on the main channel. That's the big one. The government mandated break, really, we, as soon as we were flipping, you know, there's thousands of code pages of like text in the government's ruling, but we're sort of deep into this ruling, we're like, wait a second, what's this?
21:49 Speaker 02 Yep.
21:49 Speaker 03 Main channel. So you're telling us if we started up a side channel of Hamish and Andy, we could get away with publishing a limited amount of stuff over the mandated break? And then our lawyers tell us, yes, we can.
22:01 Speaker 02 There's just a lot of nodding before some whooping and excitement. So we've started Hamish and Andy plus plus.
22:08 Speaker 03 Why plus plus? Just because it seemed like, you know, you've got Disney plus, Apple plus. And we're like, everyone's doing plus. Could we be one plus better?
22:18 Speaker 02 So it turns out we can.
22:20 Speaker 03 But to make it even more exciting, the way it's written is Hamish and Andy, then P L U S.
22:26 Speaker 02 Word.
22:27 Speaker 03 Then the symbol.
22:27 Speaker 02 Then the symbol.
22:28 Speaker 03 So it's both. So it's both. We've got all bases covered. Hamish and Andy plus plus is launching.
22:33 Speaker 02 Anything that's not the main Hamish and Andy podcast, we'll put up there over the ride. The remembering project will be there, but this new show we're doing called Quizmas with Hamish and Andy is going to be coming out on December 11th, Thursday after we finish the main pod, the government mandated break kicks in. Ham, we're excited about Quizmas because you and I are going to play together. We're going to be on the same team.
22:55 Speaker 03 Yep.
22:56 Speaker 02 And people can listen along to our quiz and see if they can beat us in their cars, whether on road trips or in the summer sun.
23:02 Speaker 03 Quizzes are exploding at the moment. Anna and I privately do a lot with like, we spend a lot of time doing quizzes and sending each other scores and whatnot. So do we bring this into the main arena? Well, not the main arena, plus plus. Do we bring this into plus plus?
23:15 Speaker 02 Yes.
23:15 Speaker 03 And, and invent something? Yeah. Whereas Anna says, you can play along with us. So it's a, it's a part quiz, but part see if you can beat Hamish and Andy. It all will be explained once you start listening to episodes of Quizmas. But since we're on the same team and Jack is flat out, we, he can't be part of it. Too busy. We needed a quiz master.
23:34 Speaker 02 Yep.
23:34 Speaker 03 And I was like, you know what? There's someone, there's someone in our life that not only does a lot of pub trivia and is the trivia-est person we know, but has what I think is one of the great, shows a history of trivia, not just trivia, but shows a history of. A trivia loophole that I wanted, I wanted to get him up to describe today. He's featured on the show in various forms over the year, be it not receiving a jumper or a many other ways. Magic Mike, not a stripper. How are you, Mike? He joins us now. Gusto to you.
24:04 Speaker 07 Gusto to you, boys. Ready to quiz.
24:06 Speaker 03 Yes. Haye tells me though, there was something you wanted to absolve yourself of. I was like, you're the perfect choice for this, mate, because I remember you telling me this story. That happened a long time. What year did your trivia scam take place?
24:20 Speaker 07 This dates back to 2012.
24:22 Speaker 03 You had a trivia scam? What, were you a magician then or pre magician?
24:26 Speaker 07 I was, yeah, I was magicianing. I was probably in the early stages of like not really doing it for a job.
24:33 Speaker 03 Magic curious.
24:35 Speaker 07 Yeah, yeah.
24:37 Speaker 03 And so was it at a pub, was it at a pub trivia, your scam?
24:40 Speaker 07 No, it was, it was radio trivia. So I feel, um, feel like I'm telling you guys the radio secrets here of how, how us know.
24:48 Speaker 03 13 years ago, I say, Mike's never talked about this, but I go, mate, there's statute of limitations. You're not going to get in trouble. It was the, it was like the Canberra radio, what was the station?
25:00 Speaker 07 106.3.
25:01 Speaker 03 106.3. It was their breakfast quiz and it was that thing where a lot of breakfast shows do this. They go like 10 questions in a minute.
25:07 Speaker 07 Yeah. So I'll, I'll tell you how it went down, right? I'm driving, I'm, I'm driving and I park, get to the doctor's office like 10 minutes early, which is very rare for me. And I hear a turn on the radio and it goes 131060, some number, call now, it's your chance to win. I take a second, I go, why not? I call it and I get on and they ask you 10 questions. Within a minute, you can pass if you want and you get $10 per correct answer. But if you get all 10, 1000. So that's the huge big win. So I, um, I got four. I didn't do that well. And then there was a double nothing question, which I think I luckily got. So I, I went with 80 bucks. I get home, housemates, got five other guys I'm living with. Okay, guys, let's go on the radio this morning. Wasn't that hard.
25:52 Speaker 07 I reckon we could try do this as a team, loudspeaker. Let's see if we can get all 10. The next, so that was a Friday. On Monday, same thing. I call up. And I get on again and they go, the producer says, have you played this month? And I went, oh yeah, I think I might have. And they checked the database. Oh, you played on Friday. I'm like, that's right. Yeah, it was Friday. And they go, you're not meant to play more than once a month, but we'll allow it. They probably saw that I got four questions right and was no threat. But at this point, loudspeaker, and we do it as a team of five guys and we get about seven or eight right. We get a bit better, but the whole time my phone was vibrating because my brother was listening. And he was texting through all the answers.
26:37 Speaker 07 So then the next time we go, all right, let's have my brother in one ear, loudspeaker with all my housemates and see if we can do it. And we got nine out of 10, kept getting nine, got to work. And it got so common that my boss and my work would say, how'd you go this morning on the trivia? I went, nah, I got nine again. How are you getting through every time? Are you using different names? They would have had your phone number. So we had to go get SIM cards and have, I had these plastic sleeves, like look like a drug dealer in the house, with separate SIM cards and a piece of paper with that phone number on it. But the funny thing happened, I'm going to my office. Boss is like, how'd you go this morning? I go, I may got nine out of 10 again. Some question about the Russian royal family in the 1920s, like what city were they murdered?
27:22 Speaker 07 Who knows that? Half an hour later, I get back from lunch, on my desk is a magazine, highlighted, trivia magazine, highlighted question 12, what city was the Russian family murdered? I'm like, oh my God, that's exactly it. I look through all of them. All these questions are all the really hard ones. They must get easy ones from wherever, but then all the really hard ones are from this magazine. What's the magazine? The Qantas in-flight magazine.
27:51 Speaker 07 And that was monthly back then. And I realised that on the 31st of August, you could go on to Qantas.com and log in and you could get the next month's magazine online. So then we had access to all the answers, all the questions that they were probably going to use for like the really hard ones. So we ended up then getting on and they were just firing all these ridiculous ones at us. And we were nailing them like one time, they actually said the question wrong, but I knew the answer. Like I knew what they meant to say and I thought they answered right.
28:25 Speaker 02 So how many times did you win the thousand?
28:27 Speaker 07 Several times. And this is when we were uni students. So a thousand bucks then, like a 22 year old.
28:33 Speaker 02 Oh, yeah. Huge.
28:34 Speaker 07 And then the funny thing is the two radio hosts, during that time, I like knew them, like I never, I never told them that I was doing it. But then we actually happened to by chance work together. I was doing magic at this event and they were there and I ended up becoming friends. And one of them ended up being my celebrant to my wedding a few months ago.
28:52 Speaker 03 Our calculations was that the Rod and Bigsy show that you started doing this on?
28:56 Speaker 07 That's exactly right. Yeah.
28:57 Speaker 02 Yeah, right. And, and, and did you ever tell either of them?
29:01 Speaker 07 No.
29:01 Speaker 02 So Bigsy doesn't know?
29:03 Speaker 07 Bigsy doesn't know, Rod doesn't know. No, none of them.
29:06 Speaker 02 Hey, mate.
29:06 Speaker 03 Well, we thought it was about time to.
29:09 Speaker 07 Uh oh.
29:11 Speaker 03 Well, I mean, if you're gonna be the host, we've got to get this clear the air. Surely you, you've lived with the burden of this secret for too long. I mean, it's probably one of the great radio heists in history.
29:21 Speaker 02 Yes.
29:21 Speaker 03 But I think, oh, Jack, what's the statute of limitations for gaining money by deception?
29:28 Speaker 02 You would have looked into it thoroughly, wouldn't you?
29:30 Speaker 03 It's about eight years or something, isn't it?
29:32 Speaker 02 Yeah, I mean, if it's 12 years, what is it? 13 years? I think you should be fine. Joining us now, Magic Mike is Bigsy. Bigsy, you there?
29:40 Speaker 08 So good. I am here. Hello. How are you, boys?
29:43 Speaker 03 Bigsy, really good, mate.
29:45 Speaker 02 Did you know that this was happening?
29:47 Speaker 03 Do you remember this amazing golden streak of people winning the quiz?
29:52 Speaker 08 I do remember the quiz. Of course, it's the bread and butter of any, you know, radio show.
29:59 Speaker 08 It, the deception runs deep and it cuts real bad. I also just think, credit where credit's due, the fact that I had no idea is amazing. But obviously, and like you've gamed the game, which is incredible, Magic Mike, because it's luck to be able to get through to be the right caller.
30:18 Speaker 03 Yeah.
30:18 Speaker 08 I don't know about the Qantas magazine, though. I think that might be a bit of a coincidence, but like also.
30:26 Speaker 03 Hundred percent, I can tell you.
30:28 Speaker 08 Well, okay, well, I'm not going to take responsibility for that because that's a producer, so I'll throw them under the bus.
30:33 Speaker 03 Yeah, we all know. I mean, yeah, everyone in here that works in radio is like, if I was a producer, first thing I'd do is be like, oh, man, I was looking at the corner smack. They're pretty hard to work. Hundred percent.
30:43 Speaker 08 I'm furious because I wasn't in on it. Clearing out our promotional budget. I probably lost my job over that. So it's your fault, right?
30:51 Speaker 03 We budgeted for it to go off once in a year. It's a well thought out scam. And I mean, anyone wanting to emulate it, you wish them luck. You wish them luck. That's, that is the game. And we, I mean, thanks, Big Z. It's, does it feel good to have it off your chest, Mike?
31:05 Speaker 07 I feel great. My shoulders are back. I didn't know, didn't know this was happening on this call. That's so funny. Good to hear your voice. I feel like I'm hearing Big Z's voice and ready to Google something.
31:14 Speaker 03 He's about to yell out Luxembourg.
31:19 Speaker 02 Thanks, Big Z. Thanks, Mike. We look forward to doing Quizmas with you. We needed you to air that. We can't have a corrupt quiz master, so.
31:26 Speaker 03 But don't you think? Exactly the kind of trickery, and that's the kind of evil mind we want running our quiz.
31:31 Speaker 02 Absolutely. And he'll be, he'll be alive to our tricks. Hamish, Hamish and Andy plus plus and Quizmas is launching on the 11th of December, the week after we finish. So, um, yeah, look out for it.
31:42 Speaker 03 Thanks, Mikey.
31:43 Speaker 07 Cheers.
31:48 Speaker 03 I don't know about you guys, but do you ever, I mean, as, as children of the 90s, we grew up in the 90s, we were born in the 80s, but you know, your peak TV years were the 90s.
31:57 Speaker 02 Yeah, absolutely.
31:57 Speaker 03 And as TV was in its like absolute heyday, late 90s, early 1000s, free to a TV, just dominating. Do you ever look back at the shows that were like pivotal in our childhood and just go, what? Like you can go from being the biggest star and you just never hear of them again.
32:14 Speaker 02 Yeah.
32:15 Speaker 03 Like some of these people, a big one for us at the moment, a big one that I've been thinking about is on our TV, when you switch it on, one of the channels on the TV, before you like connect to the HDMI or whatever, one of the channels is just 24 hours a day, The Nanny with.
32:35 Speaker 02 Really? Frankly.
32:36 Speaker 03 The Nanny over and over and over again. And the kids have come to love The Nanny.
32:41 Speaker 02 I loved The Nanny.
32:43 Speaker 03 Mate, it holds up. I'll tell you, the writing's great. Friends, unbelievable.
32:46 Speaker 02 Yeah.
32:47 Speaker 03 Here's a few things you come back to as someone now that's like in their 40s, watching something they watched a lot when they were like 13 or 14 or 15. Number one, we thought C, remember you thought Cece, who was Mr Sheffield?
33:02 Speaker 02 Yeah.
33:02 Speaker 03 The people that don't know the show, I know we're going into the weeds here a bit, but we thought she was this old, annoying. Like, oh, she's so old, she's a witch. She's just like a young, like, she's a babe.
33:15 Speaker 03 But to a thirteen year old, you're like, oh god, Cece, get out of here.
33:18 Speaker 02 Yeah, exactly. Because the kids in the show were often getting annoyed with Cece and we related to the kids.
33:23 Speaker 03 That's, I guess, so Zoe loves watching The Nanny because unbeknownst to me, like, all her outfits were like unbelievable.
33:30 Speaker 02 Right. At the nanny or Cece's?
33:32 Speaker 03 No, the nanny. No, Cece just had power suits and stuff on and was, she, she, the wardrobe department didn't do her any favours. But, cause I've been watching a ton of The Nanny over the last few weeks, it really has swept, like, to the point where like, you know, the kids get half an hour of screen time. My daughter will usually choose The Nanny.
33:49 Speaker 02 Wow.
33:49 Speaker 03 And it's in four, three on the TV, like, it's not even.
33:53 Speaker 03 My dream of showing the kids Seinfeld has had, has stutter started because I was like, guys, maybe you're old enough. Maybe you guys are old enough to watch Seinfeld.
34:03 Speaker 02 Right, I would have been that age watching Seinfeld.
34:05 Speaker 03 Another big show at the time, like, you know, my son's eleven and.
34:09 Speaker 02 It's not gonna hold the same impact as The Nanny this time.
34:12 Speaker 03 I unfortunately, I was like, we can't start season one because it.
34:15 Speaker 02 No, go straight to three.
34:17 Speaker 03 Yeah, I went straight to season three and I went to the episode where Jerry and George have to have dinner with Elaine's dad. And he has the suede jacket, he has to turn inside out. That is, I love that episode because it's like candy stripes on the inside and then the dad's like, you're not wearing that in the rain with me. And he ruins his suede jacket. Now, it's a slow burn of an episode. And I will forgive the children for this, but they uttered the words to me, this is boring. Okay, well, I'm obviously not grounding you for that. Like, I can't kick you out of the house for that, but you've done a bad thing. But I hear you. And they're like, can we watch The Nanny?
34:55 Speaker 03 Okay. And look, the nanny's faster paced. I get it.
34:58 Speaker 02 It's faster paced. Also, there's, there's more adult themes in Seinfeld. He's trying to pick up chicks and do all those type of things. The nanny does a lot of aside, man. It was like the nanny was kid friendly, essentially. I thought the nanny played more closer to Full House than Seinfeld was.
35:13 Speaker 03 Take it from someone that's watched 50 episodes recently. There was some risque stuff from Fran in there, but it was, we probably just didn't pick up on it at the time. I'm not gonna say all of it held up. Like, I think it would be problematic these days to have someone in Mr Sheffield's position making the kind of comments he's making.
35:32 Speaker 02 Yes.
35:32 Speaker 03 But by and large, look, it holds. The, but the interesting thing is, I'm sitting there watching it and you're like, at the time, this was a global hit, right? Like late nineties. I'm like, what has Mr Sheffield done after that? He went from being Mr Sheffield on The Nanny, like killing it.
35:48 Speaker 02 Hmm.
35:49 Speaker 03 And then he disappeared. And so I did a bit of research and I did ask ChatGPT. I said, listen, who's the actor that played Mr Sheffield? What did he do after The Nanny?
35:58 Speaker 02 Hmm.
35:58 Speaker 03 And is he okay financially? Like, is it, because again, I just have this thing where I worry you, you burned so bright. And then did life get tough?
36:07 Speaker 02 Yeah.
36:07 Speaker 03 And you faded away or something bad happened to him? Here's what we know. ChatGPT couldn't give me an answer for his actual financials, but he did 145 episodes of The Nanny.
36:21 Speaker 02 He's fine.
36:22 Speaker 03 Yeah. Well, I mean, Andy, that's like.
36:24 Speaker 02 I know, but maybe.
36:24 Speaker 03 He's living a vast life at that time.
36:26 Speaker 02 Yeah. And don't you get kickbacks from like syndication?
36:29 Speaker 03 Yep. Fortunately, he did a hundred, because Fran, Fran Drescher invented The Nanny. So she's fine. She's a creator. She's, she's looked after. If I'm watching it, like if someone in Australia is watching 50 episodes, like that's happening all over the world. She's probably getting 20 cents every time we watch an episode. Our house is easily keeping the lights on at Fran's house. But it's rumored, or it's understood that he did get residuals. He does get, he got a, he got a cut. So he gets a worldwide cut of the syndicated stuff. So, cause he's only had a few little roles after some, some stage, a little bit of voice acting.
37:02 Speaker 02 I saw him in Lauren Order, Lauren Order SVU. Yeah.
37:06 Speaker 06 Wait, as a criminal?
37:08 Speaker 02 Uh.
37:09 Speaker 06 Victim?
37:10 Speaker 02 He might have been the lawyer.
37:12 Speaker 03 Yeah, possible. He was on. He was on Days of Our Lives.
37:16 Speaker 06 He wasn't a victim.
37:18 Speaker 03 He wasn't a victim. Okay. No, he was. So he was an honorable role, not a, he wouldn't have signed up to be a dirtbag because that's bad for his image.
37:24 Speaker 06 Right. He could have been. I mean, he's, he's, he's might have been trying to change it after the nanny. He might have been trying to, like the, the type of people you see on Law and Order SVU is hilarious. Like Will Arnett is, is, is, he's got like a child internet ring that he shouldn't be.
37:39 Speaker 02 Really?
37:39 Speaker 06 He's the banker.
37:40 Speaker 02 He's the banker, like before he's Will Arnett. Like you go through and there's all these amazing famous actors that go on to do stuff and they're, they're doing.
37:48 Speaker 03 Played roles as like the worst kind of villains.
37:50 Speaker 06 The worst type of, yeah.
37:53 Speaker 02 Yeah. And I guess you can't like go back and say, I would take that episode down now.
37:57 Speaker 06 Please take the episode where I'm a child predator.
37:59 Speaker 03 I didn't know I would then become involved in the Lego movie. I, that's what I, that's the kind of stuff I do.
38:05 Speaker 06 Yeah.
38:06 Speaker 03 I guess, I guess this raises the question, like, Andy, I've got the nanny covered. You've got Law and Order SVU covered. So we're both like heavily got the late nineties, early thousands. Like we've got drama and comedy covered. What are you watching, Jack? We need you to get onto a show. So you can keep tabs on the nineties.
38:22 Speaker 06 Sadly, I've tried to show Bianca both The Simpsons and Seinfeld because she didn't grow up watching either of them.
38:29 Speaker 03 She didn't get into The Simpsons?
38:30 Speaker 06 No. And, and I, it just didn't land how I thought it would.
38:34 Speaker 03 What episode did you? I started. When we started Simpson Sunday, which we also do in our house, which still holds after four or five years, we started with Monorail.
38:42 Speaker 06 I started with, I started with Lemon Tree episode, which is a strong episode.
38:47 Speaker 03 It's a strong.
38:47 Speaker 06 But it's not, when you watch The Simpsons back, it's not like laugh out loud funny. And I was kind of turned towards her, waiting for her reaction.
38:56 Speaker 02 One of those things where you put a show on, but then you face the person, not the viewer.
39:00 Speaker 06 I think I put too much pressure on.
39:04 Speaker 03 The second time you pause and rewind to go, yeah, so please stop asking me questions. You're missing, so you know.
39:11 Speaker 06 Don't check your phone.
39:12 Speaker 03 Don't check your phone. He says, he says dough a lot, but if you don't watch, you're not gonna hear him say dough.
39:24 Speaker 01 Thanks for listening. The Hamish and Andy podcast will return next week. Catch up or contribute at hamishandandy.com.
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