Pod Insights Hamish & Andy 2025 Ep 309 - Groundhog Day, But With More Weasels About this episode We can't believe it's happened again… Groundhog Day - or should we say Weasel Day?! Jack’s somehow wriggled his way into yet another shot at winning a prize from the listeners. This time, listener Leigh holds all the power and decides what kind of chance Jack will get to win the piano. Hamish and Jack break into song to celebrate Andy’s new naughty catchphrase. Plus, another round of Extreme Empaths, and Andy’s got a game involving his mother-in-law’s plates!
1. Jack vs. Leigh vs. The Listeners
2. “I say what I want”
3. Extreme Empaths
4. The plate game
Transcript 7,794 words · 15 speakers
0:02 Speaker 00 A Listener Production.
0:07 Speaker 01 Activate your internet because the Hay Mission and the podcast starts in three, two...
0:17 Speaker 01 Sorry, it's still buffering. One.
0:23 Speaker 02 Ahoy to me hammers, hammer. Yes, it's nicknames we would like to introduce.
0:31 Speaker 03 Ahoy to me damper. Jack, I wouldn't mind damper as a nickname. It sounds very like true Australian.
0:37 Speaker 02 A few people call you damper behind your back at parties. Oh no, dampen gear.
0:43 Speaker 03 It's like you're dampening the mood. No, damper is like that bread that like bushrangers used to make.
0:48 Speaker 02 Yeah, simple, high carb Aussie jackpost.
0:54 Speaker 03 And I am keys. Oh, we're all part of the piano.
0:57 Speaker 02 We are all.
1:00 Speaker 03 The hammers that hit the strings, the dampeners.
1:03 Speaker 02 That stop the strings. That say to the strings, that's quite enough.
1:08 Speaker 03 And of course, the keys that make it happen. Miraculously, it's fallen to me for that one. We're just going to go straight into this today.
1:17 Speaker 02 What a show we've got today. What an episode. This, it's so exciting to be at the brink of something that will either be famous or infamous in the history of the show. We started the, isn't it crazy? We started the year with the, let's be honest, the debacle of the golf cart.
1:33 Speaker 03 Yeah.
1:34 Speaker 02 You know, it was meant to be a simple weaseling.
1:36 Speaker 03 Yep.
1:37 Speaker 02 There was a handback of a huge prize and a longing for a smaller prize, a seizing, an attempted seizing of that prize. And then ultimately, a, some would say fair, some would say foul, rigging of a contest to award a prize to a man. And we thought that chapter was over, but now we find ourselves in the piano saga.
1:58 Speaker 03 Yep, a brand new piano sits there, Jack.
2:01 Speaker 02 It's in the studio with us.
2:02 Speaker 03 It looks amazing.
2:03 Speaker 02 Jack's already gone and given a little tinkle. I said he wasn't allowed to. A beautiful KY ND21 upright piano from Stuart Kelly's House of Pianos. We salute you, Stu.
2:13 Speaker 03 He's here.
2:14 Speaker 02 He's here.
2:14 Speaker 03 He's out of the house.
2:15 Speaker 02 He's just to make sure.
2:16 Speaker 03 Now, just go over to the house now thinking that it's unguarded. He's left it off.
2:19 Speaker 02 This is pre-recorded.
2:23 Speaker 03 Um, I mean, it's a beauty.
2:25 Speaker 04 It's so nice.
2:25 Speaker 03 We never expected to get a piano this good. And Jack, Jack, Jack came in and just went, gosh, I really want that.
2:33 Speaker 02 You look like a little boy, we know you're a little boy. You look like a little boy on Christmas morning. Who's not sure if that present is for him.
2:42 Speaker 02 Not sure if he's at the right house. He's looking at the Christmas tree going, do I live here? I hope I live here because then I can have that present.
2:51 Speaker 03 Stu tells me it's perfect for beginners, Jack, but also experienced pianists, what you may become, Jack, if you practise enough.
2:59 Speaker 04 The problem I see with, with seeing it in the flesh, and it is so nice, is I gave myself a bit of a pep talk before the show this week and said, I'm not, I've used up so many weasel tokens this year, I'm not gonna go crazy for it.
3:14 Speaker 02 Remember Augustus, when you get into the chocolate factory, don't eat all the chocolate. You have had more than enough chocolate for one little boy. But then you saw the waterfall.
3:22 Speaker 04 You see the chocolate.
3:23 Speaker 02 And you found you can't help it. I could put my head in.
3:31 Speaker 03 Exciting. I should actually point out, you can head to, uh, houseofpianos.com.au to check out the piano we're talking about.
3:38 Speaker 04 It's the only place I'll go to.
3:39 Speaker 03 Jack may have to go there to get his own, he mightn't. Hey, let's bring everyone back up to speed. Jack, you gave away your piano.
3:47 Speaker 02 Yes. Which was a nice gesture aimed at rebalancing the karma between show and listeners.
3:53 Speaker 04 Yes.
3:54 Speaker 02 Yep.
3:55 Speaker 03 Turns out you gave it away twice and you didn't even realise, you'd already offered it to a fellow called Lee on your other radio show, which is separate to the podcast. So Lee then, we've tracked down, we've chatted to Lee, we're gonna give him the opportunity to win this piano because he feels he's owed one.
4:12 Speaker 02 In the, in the balance of the universe, Lee is owed a piano from you. Now, before we knew about Lee, you gave away your piano to Matt, listener Matt, he has your old piano. That was, we thought that kind of balanced everything out.
4:27 Speaker 04 And this is a bit of a warning about good deeds as well, because I gave away that piano. And then look who comes out of the woodwork, but somebody else who claims that piano as well. And all of a sudden, I'm doing something nice, he's costing me something more.
4:39 Speaker 03 The problem is you've done it nice twice. And only had enough, uh, materials or goods to do it nice once.
4:47 Speaker 02 Yeah. Yep, that is true, Andy. You were in line, probably in another world, Jack. We would be sitting here just quite simply giving you a new piano, using your weasel tokens to go, you know what, you did a nice thing. Stuart from, he's come out, he's got a house full of pianos. And he said, you know what, I heard about the nice thing Jack did. Look, forget about the golf cart debacle. I think Jack could have a new piano. But you can't have a new piano because you're down one piano.
5:13 Speaker 04 I doubt it would have played out like that.
5:18 Speaker 02 Your inventory, you're down one piano. Now, the really simple thing here to do would just be like, well, thank God Stuart exists because it just goes straight to Lee. Which we can do, Jack. Right now, we could just give this straight to Lee. Except you would like the piano back.
5:35 Speaker 04 Well, I think, I think everybody wants to see another contest. That's what, that's what brings excitement and entertainment to the show. Just giving away a prize, I've always found kind of boring. But to do some sort of contest like last time, like I, I'm sorry that I won everybody, but it wasn't exciting.
5:53 Speaker 03 Well, it's not the show's debt, Hame, to give Lee a piano. The show has acquired this piano. It's not our debt. It's Jack's debt to give Lee a piano, or at least give him the opportunity to get one. We, hence, we've also put it out to the listeners.
6:08 Speaker 02 Yep. Well, we decided on last, the last time we talked about this, there's three parties who have a, either a claim or a wish for the piano.
6:16 Speaker 04 Yes.
6:16 Speaker 02 Lee has a claim to the piano.
6:18 Speaker 04 Yes.
6:19 Speaker 02 Jack has a wish, if you ask us, a claim, if you ask him. And then the listeners have a wish for the piano. So you have three parties here. And the last time we spoke, people, remember, we said, all right, I think last time Jack was in charge of who gets how many tickets in the raffle. We think Lee should be in charge this time. He seems to be the front of the queue.
6:36 Speaker 03 And the way we're going to do this is 88 keys on a piano.
6:40 Speaker 02 We're going to let Lee decide to divvy up amongst those three parties, Lee, Jack and listeners. Who gets how many keys?
6:49 Speaker 04 Okay, I like that.
6:50 Speaker 02 And then you get stickers corresponding and you can place them like on a roulette table. You put your chips down. So he might say, okay, Jack, you get 20 keys.
6:58 Speaker 04 Out of 88?
6:59 Speaker 02 Yes, and then you get to choose.
7:01 Speaker 03 How would that make you feel?
7:02 Speaker 04 I would, I'd feel a little shortchanged, but that's actually not too bad.
7:09 Speaker 02 That's a quarter of the key.
7:11 Speaker 03 Well, but I'm just thinking it's like three, three, there's three parties.
7:14 Speaker 02 Well, there is, but nobody's saying it has to be an even split.
7:19 Speaker 03 Four hundred and fifty-three people registered at hamishnade.com. An outstanding reach out, given the fact a piano is a big offering.
7:29 Speaker 02 Big commitment and you have space for it in your house. So, well, then if Lee goes, okay, the listeners can have fifty keys. We simply then, if it lands on one of the listener keys, then we have to go to a randomizer on the computer and we'll select it that way.
7:42 Speaker 03 Okay.
7:42 Speaker 02 And then he gets, Lee's got all the rest of the keys. If it lands on one of his, very, very simple, he's coming to the studio today, he can just take the piano home.
7:49 Speaker 03 Fair rule.
7:51 Speaker 03 The way we're going to decide what key comes up is we're going to ring Matt in Tasmania, who has your old piano. Ask him to walk across to his piano.
8:03 Speaker 02 He won't know the keys that we've stickered in here. So to him, it's just simply a normal keyboard in his house in Tasmania.
8:09 Speaker 03 Yeah.
8:09 Speaker 02 He presses one key and let the piano decide. Let the music decide who the rightful owner of this piano is. That sounds like a good deal.
8:20 Speaker 03 That's a great idea. Okay. It's amazing we're back here again. It's in Lee's hands to make the decision. Let's have a look back and see how the hell we got here.
8:31 Speaker 05 It feels like Groundhog Day, that we are here again. Can you believe this? Again and again.
8:37 Speaker 02 Gimme, gimme, gimme all for Jack. Oh, what a golf cart.
8:40 Speaker 05 Yeah. Thirty-five. Yeah.
8:44 Speaker 02 I honestly can't believe it.
8:45 Speaker 05 I know. It's insane. It's not what people want. There are boos and there are thugs down. This is a take that was incredibly unpopular. It's just horrendous and it's getting a lot of media attention.
8:57 Speaker 06 People are asking.
8:58 Speaker 03 What's he going to do to make it right? To ease the people being unhappy about that, I said I would give something of mine away and I chose my piano.
9:10 Speaker 07 Wow. These are promises that we make to each other.
9:14 Speaker 05 Exactly what he promised to do.
9:16 Speaker 07 Neighbor to neighbor, friend to friend.
9:19 Speaker 02 It's a big sacrifice, so I think the gods will be happy.
9:22 Speaker 03 After so many broken promises, people here on the ground have low expectations that things will change.
9:28 Speaker 02 Matthew Campbell. How are you going? Mate, well, great news. You've got yourself a brand, well, new to your house. A brand new piano. And so the kids are loving it? Oh, it's the best.
9:40 Speaker 05 But then we hear this on the-
9:41 Speaker 03 Christian O'Connell Show.
9:43 Speaker 08 Thank you very much. Let's get to Lee. Good morning, Lee. Jack, when can I come around and grab my free piano that you offered?
9:50 Speaker 05 I was dumbfounded. Promises made, promises broken, it's become a recurring theme.
9:54 Speaker 04 Did I at one point offer a listen to my piano?
9:56 Speaker 05 Yeah. He doesn't know whether he's coming or going. But he promised. These are promises that can never be fulfilled. And then he goes and says this.
10:07 Speaker 04 Yeah, I would, I would take it back.
10:10 Speaker 09 People are sick and tired.
10:12 Speaker 04 Now I've got no piano and I would love to have a piano.
10:17 Speaker 05 I honestly can't believe it. His track record- Is atrocious.
10:20 Speaker 07 Yet again, yet again.
10:21 Speaker 05 We are back here again, discussing the same thing that we are.
10:24 Speaker 04 I don't know, because I want a new piano. I don't know.
10:28 Speaker 05 Will he ever be satisfied? Here we are again. Here we are again. This is a huge decision, huge impact. The decision, the outcome of this monumental decision. Well, it's-
10:38 Speaker 02 In Lee's hands.
10:39 Speaker 07 In Lee's hands.
10:40 Speaker 04 It really is in Lee's hands.
10:46 Speaker 02 Oh. Welcome here, Lee. Welcome to the studio, Lee. How's that build up?
10:51 Speaker 08 That was, um, what I was expecting, actually.
10:55 Speaker 02 Well, it's probably, it's a moment of huge gravitas on the show. Are you happy with the format we've gone for to select who gets the piano?
11:04 Speaker 08 Questionable, but-
11:05 Speaker 02 Really? Pretty good game, we thought. Eighty-eight keys, eighty-eight stickers.
11:08 Speaker 08 Not from your behalf, but the fact that Jack's still involved in it somehow.
11:12 Speaker 02 Oh, that's a bad start. No. We haven't even begun the negotiation.
11:16 Speaker 08 And I'm a fair guy. Yeah, I am a fair guy.
11:18 Speaker 02 Okay, well, before we find out.
11:21 Speaker 04 I don't like this, Lee.
11:23 Speaker 02 Yeah.
11:25 Speaker 02 He's coming strong, isn't he, Jack?
11:26 Speaker 04 Yeah, because Lee, even-
11:27 Speaker 08 Jack, don't be nervous.
11:28 Speaker 04 Even as I waved to you through the studio glass, you did this thing like, like you're looking at me, like watching what I'm doing.
11:34 Speaker 02 Nero on Meet the Fockers.
11:39 Speaker 03 Well, gotcha. Jack has asked Lee whether he could have two minutes one-on-one with you without us in the room.
11:47 Speaker 04 Like a negotiation.
11:48 Speaker 03 We have granted Jack that. We understand producers asked you that, and what was your response?
11:55 Speaker 08 Well, the initial response was Jack's already wasted enough for my time, so I don't think two minutes, you know, in a scheme of things is gonna hurt moving forward. So I will allow it.
12:07 Speaker 03 Your mission is clear, as I would assume, as I understand it. You're gonna go in there and you've got two minutes to get as many keys out of Lee as you can.
12:18 Speaker 04 But can I know before we go in there, Lee, how many keys you're giving me?
12:25 Speaker 08 I reckon we'll still leave it till in there last minute. We'll just go.
12:29 Speaker 03 He can still be molded, that is, Jack.
12:31 Speaker 08 It's sort of nice to literally see you sweat in person.
12:36 Speaker 03 Well, there's three parties, obviously. There's Jack, there's yourself, and there are the listeners. And obviously, if Jack's getting his two minutes with you, Lee, we thought it's only fair that the listeners get two minutes.
12:47 Speaker 04 Yep.
12:47 Speaker 03 And they sent in a hell of a lot of voice minnows over the weekend.
12:51 Speaker 10 Ahoy, Hamish and Andy. Ahoy, boys.
12:53 Speaker 06 Ahoy, boys. Hello, Hamish and Andy. I had a piano passed down to me from my grandmother, but after a roof leak, there was water damage to it that couldn't be repaired.
13:04 Speaker 03 I've done it, Jack, and I am in between jobs. Unfortunately, my girlfriend's birthday is coming up, and I don't really know what to get her. I have a 101-year-old great-grandmother who needs a way to keep her fingers moving to prevent the onset of more arthritis. I'm an independent recording artist, and I only own a 30-centimeter, two-octave little keyboard. So anytime I have to do keys, I have to do my left hand and then record that, and then I have to record my right hand and then put that up separately.
13:33 Speaker 11 After learning for nearly 18 years, the very common man, bottom-of-the-range keyboard I had to buy when I moved to the city is so depressing to play, I hardly practise anymore.
13:44 Speaker 09 My poor 11-year-old daughter, who is dying to do music for her life, is gonna be in tears if we don't come and weasel that piano from the weasel.
13:55 Speaker 12 Hey guys, my name's Elliot. I play keys in a band, but I don't actually own a piano, which is pretty sad.
14:05 Speaker 12 I'd like to own one, but the music streamers don't actually pay a lot of money for streams, which is kind of sad. For now, I'm just gonna have to enter these competitions to try and win one.
14:15 Speaker 10 I'd love the chance to win the piano. We do only have a 6x6 brony flat that we live in, but I'm sure we could cross that bridge when we come to it.
14:24 Speaker 12 I've currently got a 20-inch piano in my house. Quite difficult to play, so I'm looking to upgrade to maybe a 65-inch piano or 70-inch piano.
14:33 Speaker 00 I've recently been talking to my mum about wanting to get one, and oh, logistically it's just so hard, as Jack would know.
14:41 Speaker 13 I have four kids. This house is just dying for a musical instrument that no one can play.
14:46 Speaker 14 Jack doesn't deserve a new piano because he made the dumb decision to give his old piano to Matt.
14:53 Speaker 05 I'm not musically talented in any way. I don't need a piano. I've got no space for a piano, but I want this piano, so Jack can have this piano.
15:05 Speaker 02 Okay, the full spectrum.
15:06 Speaker 03 Full spectrum. That was Elliot from the Rubens, actually, just dropping us a voice memo at homeysteady.com.
15:12 Speaker 02 Imagine being able to support a great Aussie band.
15:14 Speaker 03 Yeah.
15:14 Speaker 12 I love the Rubens. But, I've seen them live and he has a keyboard that's like a piano.
15:25 Speaker 03 Lee, Jack, we'll get you guys to go next door now. You'll have two minutes. We'll be able to hear, we'll be able to listen in.
15:31 Speaker 12 Okay.
15:32 Speaker 03 But Jack, you'll be able to go next door and plead your case, see how many of the 88 keys Lee will allot to you.
15:39 Speaker 02 Okay. And then we put the stickers on and we find out who gets it. Good luck, boys.
15:47 Speaker 04 All right, so. Do you not, you don't remember it, do you? No, I don't remember offering you a piano, but I believe you. I think you have a claim to many of the stickers because you deserve a piano. I would say, don't worry too much about the listeners. True weasel. Because. Weasel in the den. I know we just heard that package and like, oh, my grandma needs a piano. They just say, they'll say whatever they want. Trust me, they just say whatever they want.
16:21 Speaker 04 I think they're like, they're kind, the listeners are kind of already against me in this department of like winning stuff on the show.
16:28 Speaker 08 Do you blame them for that though?
16:29 Speaker 04 No, I don't, I don't blame them, but it's like, it can't, it can't really get any better. So I would say, don't worry too much about the listeners. I was, I was even thinking overnight, I was like, do we cut them out? So just you and me go 44 keys each.
16:44 Speaker 08 I think the listeners do have a right, possibly more so over you.
16:51 Speaker 04 I don't think so, only because that golf, that golf cart did belong to them at one stage in a way, I'll admit that. But the piano's got nothing in it.
17:01 Speaker 08 Well, these are the people that probably wanted that golf cart would just take anything away from you.
17:07 Speaker 04 Yes. See, they're, they're doing it out of spite. They're not doing it because they want a piano. They're doing it out of spite.
17:13 Speaker 08 You gotta watch that in the world. You gotta watch. Have you done anything out of spite?
17:18 Speaker 04 No, I, I only do it for personal gain.
17:23 Speaker 08 We know that. We know that.
17:25 Speaker 04 So don't worry too much about the listeners. I'm totally pro listener, totally pro listener.
17:31 Speaker 08 Let me just ask, do you consider yourself to be a nice guy?
17:34 Speaker 04 Yes, I am. When it, when it's.
17:36 Speaker 08 Well, guess where they normally finish?
17:38 Speaker 04 Last.
17:38 Speaker 08 Yeah, let's go, let's go evil. Is that what you're saying? You want me to go 50 50? See, that's more conniving again.
17:45 Speaker 04 Okay. Well, what, what, what are you thinking?
17:49 Speaker 08 Without the listeners, there's no Jack. There's no show. So let's go.
17:57 Speaker 08 Third.
17:58 Speaker 04 Yes. Love it. Thanks, Lee. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Third.
18:02 Speaker 02 That is unbelievable. Yeah. Here we go. Okay. He's coming back in.
18:05 Speaker 03 Come in, guys. All right.
18:07 Speaker 02 That is unbelievable. We heard it jump on. I've never seen Jack so happy and we've seen him happy.
18:14 Speaker 03 We now need to ask for your official answer. We heard that, but we weren't meant to be a part of that. So Lee, whatever you say next, you'll be locking in. What is your official answer? How are you going to split up the keys?
18:30 Speaker 04 I did say thirds. I think I will go.
18:36 Speaker 02 Sixty me? Sixty keys?
18:39 Speaker 03 Sixty keys?
18:39 Speaker 02 Sixty keys? Sixty percent. Sixty percent? Get your calculator out. So sixty percent you, yep.
18:45 Speaker 03 You just, so you just, did you lie to his face when you said thirty?
18:49 Speaker 02 Yeah, well, he's done it to everyone else, hasn't he? Oh, wow.
18:52 Speaker 04 Okay.
18:53 Speaker 02 No, this is, we are watching. The people will love this.
18:55 Speaker 03 So that's fifty, that's fifty.
18:57 Speaker 02 I know they will.
18:58 Speaker 03 Sixty percent is fifty-two point, fifty-two point eight keys. Would you like it to be fifty-three or fifty-two?
19:03 Speaker 02 I'm feeling generous, go fifty-two.
19:05 Speaker 03 Fifty-two.
19:06 Speaker 02 Fifty-two to you. Okay. Leaving, we have now thirty-six keys. Yep. Remaining. And then let's divide that into half. Okay. Jack? Gets eighteen keys. That's still being reasonable, Jack. So the split is you get fifty-two keys of the piano, the listeners get eighteen keys, Jack, you get eighteen keys. I think so, like.
19:29 Speaker 03 Well, you can, you're gonna lock it in, you can lock it in.
19:33 Speaker 02 There's gonna be listeners out there hating this. Yeah. Well, I mean, the listeners have, there's gonna be. But they don't tune in to me. They have been confronted, they, there's been, there's been. Confirmed. I'm honest.
19:46 Speaker 03 We're giving you the option fifty-two keys, eighteen, eighteen, done?
19:49 Speaker 02 I reckon.
19:50 Speaker 03 Done.
19:51 Speaker 02 Sorry, listeners. See how hard it is, Lee, now, just now that it's all done, this is exactly where I've been before. We go, okay, I could just be generous and then when it comes to the crunch, you go, I'll give myself a bit more of a favor. It's definitely tempting, but I would not probably pursue it like you do for a career. Yep. Well, can, can I say, I mean, in terms of the levels of swing we've seen people give themselves on the show, it is the largest advantage we've seen someone give themselves on the show. I feel like we watched a masterclass in gameplay from Jack, we listened to it, just where you came in and just tried to cut the listeners completely out, Jack.
20:26 Speaker 03 Yeah, but then, then we got blindsided by.
20:29 Speaker 02 This is just like a Survivor finale.
20:31 Speaker 03 All right.
20:31 Speaker 02 Love it.
20:32 Speaker 04 And I do, I do love the listeners, I will say that, and when I meet you in person, I love you, I love you. We.
20:39 Speaker 03 Wow. We'll pause now.
20:42 Speaker 04 What we'll do is we'll leave, because it's 52, we won't put 52 stickers on, we'll make that the majority. So there'll be stickers for Jack, there'll be stickers for the listeners.
20:50 Speaker 02 And anything blank, that's Lee's keys. Yeah.
20:54 Speaker 08 It's got a ring to it already, hasn't it?
20:56 Speaker 04 Lee's keys.
20:57 Speaker 02 Jack, you were riding a roller coaster, aren't you? Because you thought you were getting a third coming out of that room.
21:02 Speaker 04 I thought I was, I thought I got you a third, Lee. I'm still pretty happy with 18.
21:07 Speaker 08 Yeah, well, that's good.
21:08 Speaker 04 Yeah. For a second, I thought, when you gave me those devil eyes, I thought you were giving me zero or like one.
21:14 Speaker 02 Yeah.
21:14 Speaker 08 Yeah.
21:14 Speaker 02 Well, it's 20%, Jack. You've got a one in five shot here.
21:17 Speaker 04 And I've got good luck on this show. I'm not, I actually don't hate my chances.
21:23 Speaker 02 In fact, he's excited.
21:33 Speaker 02 The piano is set. The stickers have been done. It's really interesting, isn't it? I did the stickers for the listeners. Jack, you did the stickers for you.
21:42 Speaker 04 Yes.
21:42 Speaker 02 And Lee, you have all the unstickered keys. It looks like the piano is heavily stickered, but of course, the majority is unstickered. Well and truly. There was one incident, we did a quick count of the keys, Jack, and you'd actually put 19 stickers down.
21:56 Speaker 04 Yes.
21:57 Speaker 02 Not surprising that there was a.
21:58 Speaker 04 Oh, that was an honest mistake.
22:00 Speaker 02 Yep. You had to take one off. I hadn't finished doing the listener's stickers and I was very excited to swoop in and put my sticker on the one you took off.
22:10 Speaker 04 What was that? C sharp down the low end?
22:11 Speaker 02 Low C sharp, which, God, I hope it comes up.
22:15 Speaker 04 That will be amazing. I love your thinking. Lee, it's out of our hands now. It's in the hands of one man, Matt, the most beautiful dad.
22:24 Speaker 02 Yeah, I know.
22:25 Speaker 04 From Tasmania.
22:26 Speaker 02 He thought he was just doing a nice thing. He really, he entered a golf cart competition.
22:33 Speaker 02 He didn't ask to be involved in the piano saga at all. But at the time, it felt like the gods were really smiling upon the show because they decided, yes, here's a, here's a young father living in Tasmania. His daughters really want a piano. We're giving one away. Boom. His name came out of the randomizer. Perfect situation.
22:51 Speaker 04 Yep.
22:52 Speaker 02 Now he finds himself as the magical decider, the diviner. His piano is going to guide us towards the note. He's going to press one note on his keyboard.
23:03 Speaker 04 Yep.
23:03 Speaker 02 Whatever note that corresponds to in here. Whether it's red stickered, listeners, green stickered, Jack, or no stickers, Lee, that is who will win this piano.
23:13 Speaker 03 Here we go, let's call Matt.
23:18 Speaker 03 Hello, Matt speaking.
23:19 Speaker 02 Matt.
23:20 Speaker 03 Ahoy. Ahoy to you, it's Haymashandy, Jack and Lee here.
23:23 Speaker 02 Ahoy, Matt.
23:24 Speaker 03 Ahoy, Matt, you've been a solid. How you all going?
23:26 Speaker 02 Yeah, great. It's high tension in here. Things have been, things have been said and I don't want to throw anything out of context here, but it's phrases that I never thought I'd hear on this show, like, quote, "Don't worry about the listeners."
23:39 Speaker 03 Oh dear.
23:40 Speaker 02 Oh dear, that's exactly what we've.
23:43 Speaker 03 It sounds like it's gotten serious.
23:44 Speaker 02 It's gotten serious, the strategy has gone through the roof. We obviously can't tell you how many keys have been divvied up or who's got what or who's in what area, but you know what's going on here. We have a piano in here that has an assortment of stickers on it corresponding to the future rightful owner of the piano.
24:02 Speaker 03 Right.
24:03 Speaker 02 All you have to do is honestly, I think, let your heart guide you and let your heart tell your finger and your finger go where it feels like the rightful owner of the piano belongs and play that key that speaks to you the most.
24:17 Speaker 03 Matt, are you in front of the piano now? I'm in front of the piano, I'm sitting down.
24:22 Speaker 02 Let your heart guide you, Matt.
24:23 Speaker 03 Matt, when you're ready, play the note.
24:25 Speaker 02 Good luck, Matt.
24:26 Speaker 03 I'm gonna play the note.
24:31 Speaker 02 It's in the middle. Oh no, Jack's excited because there's a lot of green stickers there, Jack is so excited.
24:37 Speaker 05 I'm wandering across.
24:38 Speaker 03 Okay.
24:40 Speaker 02 There's some red in there too, listeners, there's some red.
24:43 Speaker 03 No, that's not it.
24:43 Speaker 02 That's too high, was that too high?
24:46 Speaker 03 No.
24:47 Speaker 02 Too low.
24:48 Speaker 05 Play it again, Matt.
24:50 Speaker 03 I'm going again.
24:53 Speaker 02 Oh, there's a lot of green around there.
24:57 Speaker 02 It's not.
24:57 Speaker 03 That's it.
24:58 Speaker 02 It's not middle C, is it?
25:01 Speaker 02 Is it middle C?
25:03 Speaker 04 Matt? It's, it's middle C.
25:12 Speaker 05 Oh no. Oh no, he raced for middle C too. He pushed me out of the way. Listeners, I tried to get middle C and Jack pushed me out of the way. I had everything.
25:24 Speaker 04 No.
25:25 Speaker 05 I had the two notes around it covered. Jack, no, no, no, no, no, no. This can't be happening. No, no, no, no, no.
25:35 Speaker 04 What have I done? What have I done? Matt, Matt, you want me a piano? Oh no. You don't want, wait, you don't want me to have it?
25:43 Speaker 05 No one wants you to have a piano.
25:46 Speaker 04 I don't think anybody does, do they?
25:48 Speaker 05 No one wants you to have a piano.
25:51 Speaker 04 Not even Stu from House of Pianos wants Jack to have a piano. And it's his job to give people pianos at a very competitive price. And a wonderful stick. That's the way.
26:05 Speaker 05 You just had that air about you too. He's put the signal, he's like, "I just feel good about this. I'm feeling good."
26:09 Speaker 04 Oh, I can't look. Matt, it was my first sticker on the piano. I just feel like we have a kindred spirit. You'll play my old pianos. Comme moi.
26:18 Speaker 02 In all seriousness though, in all seriousness though, Jack, as you said, you have your fun. We did it for a contest. What do you really want to happen with a piano?
26:25 Speaker 04 I can't, I can't give it away and here's why. People. Don't worry, we know why and it starts with a W.
26:40 Speaker 04 Sorry guys.
26:42 Speaker 02 Wow.
26:48 Speaker 02 And a couple of shows ago, we were talking about dimmies and tinnies. You have the hat on right now. Your dim sim brand you're involved in?
26:56 Speaker 04 Yes.
26:56 Speaker 02 You're not the only person, you know, you're not cooking them, but you're heavily involved.
27:00 Speaker 04 Don't, don't, don't want me cooking them. It sounds like I can't cook a dim sim like that. It's very...
27:05 Speaker 02 Well, no, it sounds like you're known for contaminating dim. God, you don't want me doing it. You know what I'm like. I'll put anything in there. No, they're delicious. They're available in certain markets, but we're talking about the.
27:17 Speaker 03 And alas, I mean, there was two flavors. So jump into this.
27:20 Speaker 02 We're not doing an ad, just to be really clear.
27:23 Speaker 03 But Beck likes, there's a chicken and sweet corn one. Beck loves them. Not selling well.
27:28 Speaker 02 Not selling well. This is when Diet Vanilla Coke wasn't doing well and I could tell it was gonna get taken off shelves.
27:33 Speaker 03 Beck is extremely nervous.
27:35 Speaker 02 She hoarding?
27:36 Speaker 03 Yeah, and she's extremely nervous because they're the ones she snacks under the week.
27:39 Speaker 04 Do you have a number that you know, it's like as soon as it goes below this in sales?
27:43 Speaker 03 I feel like it's gone, Jack. I feel like the other one's going beautifully, but it's, yeah.
27:48 Speaker 02 Well, I wonder if it's, I wonder if it's got anything to do with what we're gonna talk about because we were talking about the health star rating system and I said to you, do you have health stars? You're like, no.
28:00 Speaker 03 We choose not to play.
28:01 Speaker 02 Choose not to play. Fair enough. Um, don't know what the ins and outs are. Maybe it's expensive to get the health stars on. That's fine. And I said, well, you know, what can you say to people? And from memory, you said something like, well, it's it doesn't need health stars. It's delicious and nutritious.
28:16 Speaker 03 Oh, okay.
28:16 Speaker 02 And I said, can you say that? I think so. And then you said this.
28:20 Speaker 03 I can say what I want, God. What? Did I swear?
28:26 Speaker 02 Well, yeah, well, I can't play it because we need a little E.
28:30 Speaker 03 Really?
28:31 Speaker 04 I'll play it again. I'll play it again.
28:33 Speaker 03 I can say what I want, God. I can say what I want, can't I?
28:39 Speaker 02 It's not what people heard. We had hundreds of emails coming in.
28:43 Speaker 03 I think I called you a C-bomb.
28:45 Speaker 02 Now, you might have meant, I don't know what you meant, but that's what, the more we listen back to it, the more we're like, wow, who's this guy? Who is this guy? He's the head of a dim sum empire.
28:56 Speaker 02 He's doing what he wants. He's doing what he wants. And I, Jack and I were like, well, when all these emails came in from people going, please go back and listen to it. Why didn't that episode have an E on it? It should have been explicit.
29:08 Speaker 03 Can't I?
29:09 Speaker 02 You've got this guy now. And I just felt like we got a flash. We got a flash into who, what is really going on in Andy Lee's head. And so Jack and I were like, well, I guess it's, I guess we have to just accept that this is the new Andy and this is who he is.
29:25 Speaker 03 I'd never heard him say that before.
29:26 Speaker 02 Yeah.
29:26 Speaker 03 But now.
29:28 Speaker 02 It seems.
29:29 Speaker 03 He knows when he's gonna stop saying it.
29:30 Speaker 02 Seems like that's the kind of guy he is. And so that's what I guess inspired this song.
29:39 Speaker 02 He said his dog was tall, which was a weird lie. But overall, we thought he was a decent guy. Yes, we thought, and he had a heart of gold. But now we see the story that has been untold.
29:51 Speaker 03 I can say what I want, guys.
29:53 Speaker 02 If there's a big queue, who goes straight to the front?
29:56 Speaker 04 Andy!
29:58 Speaker 02 I'll do what I want. Guess who brings Macca's to a Chinese restaurant?
30:03 Speaker 04 Andy!
30:04 Speaker 02 I'll eat what I want. And who admitted they could run a Ponzi investment?
30:09 Speaker 04 Andy!
30:10 Speaker 02 I'll scam who I want. Who ignored an ivory band and shot an elephant?
30:15 Speaker 04 Andy!
30:16 Speaker 02 I'll hunt who I want. If you were a train, and he was a train, and you lived in a world where people were trains, and you needed a little push, and he could easily push you, guess who wouldn't even give you a shunt?
30:30 Speaker 04 Andy!
30:31 Speaker 02 I'll shunt who I want.
30:34 Speaker 02 Andy, I'm the king of the trains. You are a
30:39 Speaker 02 and I do whatever I want.
30:43 Speaker 03 Okay, I don't think he said that.
30:45 Speaker 02 That was too much. A real Andy.
30:51 Speaker 03 I feel like saying it though now. Like it's
30:54 Speaker 02 Yeah, it's a good catchphrase. We're gonna have to deal with you, dear, doing your new catchphrase, aren't we? All right, shall we take a little break now?
31:03 Speaker 03 Yeah, we do. Sorry.
31:06 Speaker 02 No, that's your time for your catchphrase.
31:07 Speaker 03 Yeah, I'm not buying into this.
31:08 Speaker 02 Take a break when I want.
31:17 Speaker 03 Hey, we never thought we'd be the place for this, but it's for extreme empaths to come together and share their moments of feeling, deep feelings for everyday objects. And it's a place they can share. We've got another round right now.
31:33 Speaker 02 Of course, the opener being every single song ever written, so no song feels left out. Do you want to kick it off, John, me too?
31:40 Speaker 03 Mate, so many have come in, just you're kind of like, um, this is, let's start with Margaret.
31:45 Speaker 02 Okay.
31:46 Speaker 03 She says, "We've got a cupboard at work that doesn't quite close properly, so I have to kick it shut."
31:52 Speaker 02 Cool.
31:52 Speaker 03 "Every time I kick it, I have to whisper, 'So sorry.'" "I have to open that cupboard at least 10 times a day, so it means I have to kick it at least 10 times a day, "but I try and kick it in a different spot every time, so it doesn't get too sore."
32:10 Speaker 03 Lovely, Margaret. Carly Hamm here. "I was drinking coffee out of my husband's Star Wars-themed Number One Dad in the Galaxy mug." A gift, a gift he bought himself.
32:20 Speaker 02 Well, it ain't Darth, I'll tell you that. He was a very absent father.
32:24 Speaker 03 True. "A gift he bought himself for Father's Day while I was unfolding the washing." "I happened to fold the pair of matching Number One Dad in the Galaxy socks when,
32:35 Speaker 03 "that came with the mug and set them down on the laundry bench next to the mug. "I realised it was the first reunion of the socks and the mug since the day they were packaged together as a gift set. "So I gave them the afternoon to catch up."
32:56 Speaker 02 Um, all right, this, I've got two rock-related ones. Matt? Really, rocks? Rocks. I would have thought there were some that are just immune. No, feelings can be attributed to everything. Okay. "Whenever my girlfriend Emily goes to a pebbly beach, "she digs up pebbles below the surface whenever she's sitting because she said that some pebbles won't ever get to see the sunlight."
33:23 Speaker 02 And that. That is a long, that's really, if you're ever that extrapolating that you, that's a long seat at the beach, because how does some get chosen and some not? Here's another quick one. It's from Michael. He's in Ireland. He goes, I thought I was immune to extreme empathy and tells on holidays in Greece, I was relaxing by the beach, tossing in the odd stone or two to the ocean. When it suddenly hit me, that rock has been painstakingly making its way up the seabed and onto the shore for potentially centuries, taking advantage of every wave and every tide to barely move. And here I am, just whimsically undoing all that hard graft, when all that rock wants to do is relax on the beach as well.
34:07 Speaker 02 Here's from Ashley. I'm an empath working at a winery cellar door. Okay. And we change the nine wine tasting list every week. I've noticed the manager consistently puts the most popular wines back on the list. So when I was asked to make the list this week, I put all our least popular ones. Cause I felt bad that they would sit on the shelf, watching everyone else get sold. It filled me with such great joy every time someone said something nice about the generally unpopular wines when tasting them. By the way, I'm sure it's unrelated, but I'm no longer allowed to make the tasting.
34:47 Speaker 02 And is this wine the best? No.
34:51 Speaker 02 God, no. This feels left out. God, no, we have heaps of it. Uh, this, this, this comes from Miranda. She goes, I didn't think I was an extreme empath, but I, I do have some signs. I work in a factory and my coworker will only run his machine on a speed that's an even number. While he was on holiday this week and I'm running his machine, I found myself running on only odd number speeds. Because I feel bad, they never get their chance to shine. And the even numbers might also be tired. Gives me some peace of mind to know that they've felt love for at least a week before going back into retirement.
35:31 Speaker 02 Hopefully time for one more. This is from Jed. In a moment of extreme empathy, I recently put my container of, of microwave rice on the outside of the rotating plate in the microwave rather than the setter, so it wouldn't get dizzy.
35:47 Speaker 03 I've got to finish this one because I reckon I do the same. Although I don't know if I do it as an extreme empath, I just do it through a sense of like, I don't know, sportsmanship. Abby, when putting a trolley back at the supermarket when there's more than one rack, I'll put mine in the shorter rack so they have the hope that they'll catch the more popular rack. Like, I feel like I do that too because you want to see it be an even race.
36:16 Speaker 03 Too late.
36:21 Speaker 03 Very late.
36:26 Speaker 03 Guys, I was around at my future in-laws' place, Bex' parents, and it came to the end of dinner and I was going to stack the dishwasher, but they'd already just done a cycle. So I went for the unpack of the dishwasher, which is always a dangerous game because there's specific spots for people to put their things. Oh, away from home, doing an unpack. It's hard. And I was pretty confident. I was, I was doing that thing where you, when you've, when you find a friend or a family member of, you know, the same type of glass, I'm like, okay, that's great. Well, that goes there. Oh, like when you open a cupboard and you go, oh, there's the brown mugs. Great. Great. Yep. And then I was in a situation where I put a few plates away and Bex' mum go, comes in and goes, what are you putting that there for?
37:14 Speaker 03 Already, already on the mother-in-law gear.
37:19 Speaker 03 That's a pretty aggressive impersonation.
37:23 Speaker 03 I take that back. I take it back. Okay, we're going to lead into it. She's like, what are you putting that for? And I said, well, you know, it's where you said the, the plate is, that's a good plate. You know, the, the good plates go over here, the bad plates go in here, platters and plates. And I was, all right. So then she showed me where the bad place is. She goes, well, you've put a good plate in the bad.
37:47 Speaker 03 And I was looking at the two plates going, these are indistinguishable. I don't think it's possible. I pulled out another plate. It looked to me like a bad plate. I was heading for that cupboard, just, where are you going?
38:01 Speaker 02 Oh no. Just all on the bench, all on the bench. And they can be put away by a specialist later.
38:08 Speaker 03 To prove how hard this is. I didn't put them on the bench. I've bought all of Gabby and Lee's plates in today.
38:16 Speaker 02 Even good plates.
38:18 Speaker 03 For a game I'm calling the plate game.
38:24 Speaker 03 All right.
38:27 Speaker 03 It's Jack versus Hamish.
38:29 Speaker 02 Okay, here we go.
38:30 Speaker 04 And we just simply say, good plate, bad plate.
38:32 Speaker 03 I'm gonna hold it up. I've got a pre-recorded description of the plate, so people will hear it. That's what you guys will hear first. That is your deliberation time.
38:40 Speaker 02 Are we, are we allowed to see the back of the plate?
38:44 Speaker 03 You cannot see.
38:45 Speaker 02 The manufacturer or do we have to just go off the face value?
38:50 Speaker 03 Yeah, face value, you can't see the manufacturer. Yeah. Okay, uh, here is the first plate. Andy is holding a cream coloured oval ceramic serving platter, which has a slightly scalloped edge with a wavy dark green band. Something you might find in a farmhouse setting.
39:08 Speaker 02 Easily a good plate.
39:10 Speaker 04 I was gonna say bad plate. I mean, it does look decorative, but it's run of the mill. Bad plate.
39:16 Speaker 03 Hamish gets the points.
39:17 Speaker 02 Oh, well done.
39:20 Speaker 02 Who's using a scalloped serving platter as a bad plate at their house?
39:24 Speaker 04 But it looks aged, like.
39:26 Speaker 03 I mean, that's the thing, that's the thing.
39:27 Speaker 04 Thirty years ago.
39:28 Speaker 02 Yeah, but not. Jack in the plate game, that makes a plate valuable.
39:31 Speaker 04 No, not old enough to be, not current, but not old enough to be an antique.
39:36 Speaker 02 It's not like a wood, it's not like a ceramic found in Pompeii or something. Like it's in, it's a, it's a well-made plate.
39:43 Speaker 03 I think, I think wear and tear still doesn't, I mean, you can get graduate, like you can get demoted, I suppose, but wear and tear generally doesn't affect whether it's a good plate or bad plate.
39:53 Speaker 02 I mean, that was, I felt like that was an absolute softball. Most people go, if it's a platter, it's going in the good plate cupboard.
39:58 Speaker 04 On the night, Andy, did you get that one right?
40:01 Speaker 03 I got that one wrong.
40:03 Speaker 02 No, sorry, I got that one right. You put a platter in the, yeah, no one's put a platter in the plate cupboard.
40:08 Speaker 03 I got that one wrong.
40:08 Speaker 04 Beck's mum's back in the room.
40:11 Speaker 03 What are you doing? I got that one right. The next one. Andy is holding up an oval ceramic serving platter in plain white with a glossy glaze. It features a gently scalloped shield-like rim and seems thin and delicate.
40:27 Speaker 02 Well, we know now a platter loves to go in the good plates section, so I'd put that in the good plates section. However, is Andy trying to trick us here? I'm not trying to, these are not my rules. These are the rules of Willie and Andy Hardy. No, I mean, has Andy found, has Andy found their everyday platter? Which I wouldn't, I don't have an everyday platter in my house, but who knows what Bec's parents do? Maybe they entertain daily and they use and they have an everyday platter. That does look, I think it's still a good plate. It is actually a bad plate.
41:00 Speaker 03 Really? I know.
41:01 Speaker 02 Bad platter.
41:02 Speaker 03 It's more decorative than the first one.
41:04 Speaker 02 Well. It's of a cheaper quality, though.
41:06 Speaker 03 So bad luck.
41:07 Speaker 02 A lower gloss. It's a lower gloss. That's what, I had alarm bells going. I was like, and I, and I know the way Andy structures games and I just thought he's just not going to start with two easy good plates. I should have stuck to my guns.
41:20 Speaker 03 Plate three.
41:22 Speaker 03 Andy is holding up a round ceramic plate with a cream base and a decorative border. The rim features a hand painted design with teal vertical strokes connected with black horizontal lines. It's a bold statement piece for any table.
41:37 Speaker 02 God, it's actually the platter game.
41:39 Speaker 03 Oh, sorry. Yeah, plates and platters. It's plates and platters.
41:41 Speaker 02 That's a, that's a good plate. That's a very good plate. That looks like finer, almost china. That's a good plate. Well done. You too. You both. Although the red herring there was it's completely blank. Mmm. So I can understand your distress in the kitchen, Andy. You just couldn't find the algorithm that was deciding these plates.
42:03 Speaker 03 All right, the next one. Andy is holding up a vintage style ceramic serving platter with a botanical strawberry design in the centre. The border is adorned with a matching vine, creating a garden-inspired aesthetic.
42:18 Speaker 02 What was this meal? How many people were at the dinner?
42:22 Speaker 03 It's just platters.
42:23 Speaker 02 It's just platters. Was it a wedding?
42:26 Speaker 03 Becs, Bec and Bec's taking this from her mum. You've, you've been around with Bec's. It's like, everything has to be, like even napkins go on a platter. Like it's just, it's a.
42:35 Speaker 02 Wow.
42:36 Speaker 03 Yeah, I know. Yeah. And I'm the cleaner.
42:39 Speaker 04 That's a, that's a good plate though. You can tell, I reckon, because glossy on the front and then this matte sort of side.
42:46 Speaker 02 It's ceramic. It's like ceramic. They're expensive.
42:48 Speaker 04 Yep.
42:49 Speaker 02 Yeah, that's good.
42:50 Speaker 03 It is a bad one. You're kidding me. Barely Ikea.
42:54 Speaker 02 Must be nice to live in a house where that's a bad plate.
42:58 Speaker 03 Yeah, I know. Stuff like final plate. Hamish up by one.
43:02 Speaker 02 I've gone good platter every time. Okay, here we go.
43:06 Speaker 03 Andy is holding up a light blue square shaped serving dish with softly rounded corners with a smooth glossy finish. A rather simple design makes it versatile, well suited for a contemporary table setting.
43:20 Speaker 02 That is a good plate.
43:21 Speaker 03 I reckon it.
43:22 Speaker 02 Is a good plate. We have similar at our house and they don't even live in the kitchen.
43:26 Speaker 03 Where do they go?
43:27 Speaker 02 They go next to the dining room table.
43:29 Speaker 03 Dining room table.
43:33 Speaker 02 They sit behind the two guards.
43:36 Speaker 03 Really? I was gonna say, bad plate masquerading as a good plate. I reckon it's one of those ones that looks expensive, but then they cost three bucks.
43:44 Speaker 02 It's a dupe.
43:45 Speaker 03 Yep. Jack, you'd be wrong. It's a good plate and Hamish wins triumphantly too.
43:54 Speaker 03 Congratulations, Ham. And it's a game. I'll have to play probably for the rest of my life as I go around to their house. But you guys will never have to play again.
44:06 Speaker 01 Thanks for listening. The Hamish and Andy podcast will return next week. Catch up or contribute at hamishandandy.com.
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