326 - Andy's Always Living In Hame's Head

The boys plan to use the People’s Bitcoin on a Hamish-led impulse shopping spree, then turn it into a game show where you can try to win Hamish’s haul. The Lady of Stain makes her return with some frankly shocking stain removal advice, there’s a husband-and-wife Gusto Check, and Hamish reflects on being a fast-and-loose operator. 1. Bitcoin Blitz 2. Lady of Stain 3. Double Gusto Check - Sam’s Spring Cleaning 4. Andy’s Always In Hame’s Head

• 0:02Speaker 00

  A Listener Production.

• 0:07Speaker 01

  Activate your internet, because the Hamish and Andy podcast starts in three, two...

• 0:17Speaker 01

  Sorry, it's still buffering. One.

• 0:23Speaker 02

  Ahoy to me peso, Hamish.

• 0:26Speaker 03

  Haha, si señor.

• 0:29Speaker 02

  Maybe not. Oh, do you know what? This could be a bit long. I'm gonna call this early and I could be way off here, but for huge credit points. This could be members of children's TV show The Octonauts. You could be Quasi and you could be Captain Barnacles.

• 0:45Speaker 03

  Ahoy to me Quasi, ahoy to me Captain Barnacles! What's the show? I can't believe I'm gonna...

• 0:50Speaker 02

  It's not that big, but we had a phase. Gee, that would have been about seven years ago. I think I've done alright to remember that.

• 0:55Speaker 03

  Well done, Hamish. You are peso, the penguin, the team's caring compassionate medic.

• 1:00Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 1:00Speaker 03

  Quasi, Jack the cat, the dead little orange kitten with a mysterious swashbuckling pirate past.

• 1:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, he's a larrikin. He's like the Michelangelo of the Ninja Turtles.

• 1:09Speaker 03

  Oh, my favourite turtle.

• 1:10Speaker 02

  And Captain Barnacles, you're the teddy bear and you're the sensible leader of the group. Once again, Andy giving him sort of the highest ranking of the show.

• 1:18Speaker 02

  Bit of a...

• 1:18Speaker 03

  Just the way the cards spell.

• 1:20Speaker 02

  He's just a bit of a straight-laced bear, Barnacles. They... Good question, what are the Octonauts, Jack? They live in an underwater research centre. And they go on various... I don't know who funds it. Would cost a fortune, to be fair.

• 1:34Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 1:34Speaker 02

  Like, I would estimate in actual terms, maybe a billion dollars. I mean... Really, to live down there in that level of luxury they live in. And they go out on missions to learn about sea life and help out the animals.

• 1:49Speaker 03

  Um, it says that I play the accordion. Does Captain Barnacle play the accordion?

• 1:54Speaker 02

  I don't know the full canon, to be honest. I don't know all the lore of Octonauts. I just remember, yeah, my little boy had a phase of the Octonauts. Probably about seven years ago. I remember we were on a family holiday and... I left a treasure map from the Octonauts to guide him to some treasure buried on the beach. Oh, yes. Which was, brought the house down. If you're in a, if you're in a similar, and you can do, you can do, you can do the voices quite easily. That's some good dating. Captain Barnacle.

• 2:26Speaker 02

  Ahoy there, matey, it's quasi, you know, God, it's been a while. Ahoy also to Jack, uh, here in Australia, not sure where, but, uh, logged on to hamish journey.com and, but to tell us what he's been up to.

• 2:38Speaker 04

  Ahoy, fellas. I thought I would share my magical gone in 60 seconds and God, it was stressful.

• 2:45Speaker 02

  Good boy.

• 2:45Speaker 04

  About a minute before I was supposed to go out for my wedding, wedding planner comes in and says, gives us the knock, one minute warning till you walk out. My bail said, not today, junior. And with Hamish in mind, which was exactly what I wanted to be thinking about a minute before I was gonna walk out. Um, I said, let's do this. Got it done, I reckon 45 to 47 seconds. Out we went and it was all good and it was special. So, yeah, big credit to Hamish, credit to the show for all the laughs and laughs and the good times. Cheers, mate.

• 3:17Speaker 02

  Unreal, walking lightly to the altar. Well done, Jack. Well done. When he says it was special, are you referring to the wedding or is he referring? No. Seven, 47 seconds, you don't forget that.

• 3:30Speaker 02

  I mean, weddings come and go. Yeah, a lot of people get married several times, but to pull a 47 second out under that kind of pressure, that's just, that's wonderful. That's the ultimate nervous poo. Isn't that amazing to see a lot, like, what's the last thing you did as a single man? I'll tell you what I did. Incredible.

• 3:46Speaker 02

  Forty-five, forty-two seconds. I, I weighed down a PB, that's what I did. Hey, after much debate on and off the air about what we're gonna do with the people's Bitcoin, um, we've decided you're gonna do Ham's Hives on your own. Yep, on my own dime. Uh, well, we'll see. My own dime and my own time. We'll see whether that happens. But the pilling away in the background is a very exciting and disruptive honey operation. Low, low simmer, that is bubbling away and you're not gonna cook that for many, many years, I would say. All the best things are cooked slowly.

• 4:19Speaker 02

  You want toast? Eat toast. You want a beautiful, beautiful piece of slow cooked sourdough that takes, takes a few days, you come to my restaurant.

• 4:29Speaker 03

  Have the toast, please. The people's Bitcoin.

• 4:34Speaker 02

  It was a bad analogy. He didn't do himself any favors by picking bread as the thing you should slow cook.

• 4:41Speaker 03

  Yeah, because you toast sourdough the same you toast a normal loaf of bread.

• 4:45Speaker 02

  I know, get it on Beefcake. Get it on Beefcake. But we play on.

• 4:50Speaker 03

  The people's Bitcoin will be used for an impulse buying session from yourself.

• 4:56Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 4:57Speaker 03

  Followed by a game show as created by yourself, myself and Jack, where the people can come to said game show, similar to the Price is Right.

• 5:07Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 5:07Speaker 03

  And try and win a showcase of everything that you've bought.

• 5:11Speaker 02

  Everything I bought. It serves two purposes.

• 5:13Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 5:14Speaker 02

  Could we cure me of my impulse buying compulsion and addiction by putting me in a room? And this is, this is some demands I'll have for you, Ando. You currently have the Bitcoins.

• 5:25Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 5:26Speaker 02

  And you obviously have to convert one to cash before this happens. And I would like my own card, one of the metallic ones, if possible. I've never, I don't know if they exist or not, but like, you know, we're going to be putting like, how much is Bitcoin? Ninety?

• 5:42Speaker 03

  I think at the moment like $98,000.

• 5:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, we're putting, let's say we're going to be putting close to $100,000 on this credit card. You want a metal one.

• 5:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 5:49Speaker 02

  Yeah. So it's me with the metal card in a room and I would like just coffee and cheesecake.

• 5:59Speaker 03

  Yep. Sounds like you're making up your ride right now.

• 6:04Speaker 02

  I don't know why this is like, I'm on death row, death row.

• 6:09Speaker 03

  And you didn't ask for that much. It's not that. You're not getting ninety eight thousand dollars.

• 6:15Speaker 02

  Why not?

• 6:16Speaker 03

  Well, because half the money is going into trying to produce this show.

• 6:19Speaker 02

  No, it's not. No way. The whole thing is we're burning a Bitcoin.

• 6:23Speaker 03

  It's half and half. We said that. Half and half. You get fifty thousand dollars. And then the rest is.

• 6:29Speaker 02

  No, I don't. I can't do much with fifty.

• 6:34Speaker 02

  I thought the whole thing was I'm burning a Bitcoin. Get a sponsor. Ask, call in some favors.

• 6:41Speaker 03

  The TV studios are expensive.

• 6:43Speaker 02

  You're in there all the time. You do the hundred all the time. Just ask those guys. Surely the crew love you. I would have thought, Andy. You've been running that show for years. I would have thought the crew loved you so much that they would be happy to come and do a day for free.

• 7:01Speaker 03

  I don't think so. But so. Not even a day for free. It's like stick around for half an hour at the end of.

• 7:07Speaker 02

  One hour. You're exactly right, Jack. We could do, we could knock this thing over in an hour. Easy. Easy.

• 7:12Speaker 03

  So you want to burn.

• 7:13Speaker 02

  I'll just need to get there like during the day to the loading dock and load all the prizes in. Sorry. Okay. Let's put aside the.

• 7:20Speaker 03

  No, okay, fine. You can have ninety thousand dollars.

• 7:22Speaker 02

  Great. Thank you.

• 7:24Speaker 03

  Now, but.

• 7:25Speaker 02

  That's how you negotiate.

• 7:26Speaker 03

  Well done, especially against Andy.

• 7:30Speaker 03

  Well, actually, the tagline, burn a Bitcoin, was what actually was ringing in my ear.

• 7:34Speaker 02

  What do you think about the name for the show called, we call it Bitcoin Blitz? Because it is a blitz and it's a full Bitcoin.

• 7:41Speaker 03

  Love that.

• 7:42Speaker 02

  Bitcoin Blitz, doesn't it?

• 7:43Speaker 03

  Yeah, okay. Bitcoin Blitz. Yep.

• 7:45Speaker 02

  I think our game show should be called Bitcoin Blitz. And the understanding is, you know, however many people in the audience, a hundred or whatever, they enter that room. And they will be leaving with a hundred thousand dollars in prizes.

• 7:57Speaker 03

  Yep. So if you get selected, let's get, let's try and get a huge audience. Like it's too, like I think as we can try and get as big an audience as possible. Cause that whole Price is Right feel where everyone's yelling and being excited, I think that'd be great.

• 8:06Speaker 02

  That is the vibe.

• 8:07Speaker 03

  Okay. So you're in charge of the showcase. I won't know anything you've bought until the day.

• 8:13Speaker 02

  Yeah, I like that. I think that we have to do it that way. I think the fun of the game show, I want a set too that has the, you know, the revolving.

• 8:21Speaker 03

  Oh, my gosh.

• 8:22Speaker 02

  Well, that's how you do it.

• 8:25Speaker 02

  Was it Price, Price is Right had revolving? I think they all did. Things, you know, Sailor Century, anything.

• 8:30Speaker 03

  It might not revolve.

• 8:31Speaker 02

  It should revolve.

• 8:35Speaker 02

  Because I think it's that thing of you being like, all right, let's see what the showcase is for game number three.

• 8:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 8:39Speaker 02

  You know, the revolve would be huge.

• 8:42Speaker 03

  Okay, I'll look into price up a revolve. Okay, and then I asked you though.

• 8:49Speaker 02

  Yeah, then I think you're you're as excited as everyone else is to find out what what's on offer.

• 8:53Speaker 03

  Yeah, okay. I asked you though to do a dry run.

• 8:56Speaker 02

  Sorry, just just to we're really clear for everyone, the the bit where I have the coffee and the cheesecake in the room and the, you know, a hundred thousand dollars on a credit card. I think we should call that golden day or something, you know, make a real celebration of it.

• 9:09Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 9:10Speaker 02

  I enter the room with the card and I think the best way to go.

• 9:14Speaker 03

  How long do you need, you reckon?

• 9:15Speaker 02

  I don't think I'm gonna need 24 hours, to be honest.

• 9:17Speaker 03

  You don't.

• 9:18Speaker 02

  I know that sounds crazy, but think about some big ticket items in there. There might be, you know, you get on a roll with a couple of 10,000 is.

• 9:26Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's only 10 of those.

• 9:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, you know, 24 hours for that. Like, I'm not in this. I'm not. I'm not gonna be on, you know, I'm not buying like tins of beans on online shopping. I'm putting in a big order.

• 9:37Speaker 03

  Going swinging hard. I think that's good because you want.

• 9:39Speaker 02

  Couple of hours.

• 9:40Speaker 03

  People.

• 9:40Speaker 02

  Because I won't. I'm not gonna rush through it. And I think it's important to go in with not too many preconceived ideas.

• 9:45Speaker 03

  Mm hmm.

• 9:45Speaker 02

  I think I just wanna like let for truly to get this out of my system. I just wanna let impulses take over. That's why the coffee is important.

• 9:53Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 9:53Speaker 02

  I get very fired up and make some bad decisions on coffee.

• 9:57Speaker 03

  Golden day. When are we gonna have golden day? Can we do that in the next two months?

• 10:01Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 10:02Speaker 03

  Then I think we put the show on when all the stuff arrives. Like, we probably like things take ages sometimes to get here. So we can't put the show on until all those things arrive.

• 10:11Speaker 02

  Mm hmm.

• 10:12Speaker 03

  So we're probably months away from that.

• 10:14Speaker 02

  But I think as a as a skeleton, this is this feels right.

• 10:18Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 10:18Speaker 02

  Um, for Bitcoin Blitz, Jack, do you want to do the music for the show?

• 10:22Speaker 03

  Oh, I would love to. Like, make a jingle for them.

• 10:25Speaker 02

  Well, don't we need a house band kind of thing? Like, could you?

• 10:28Speaker 03

  House band? Think, what is this? Not a Tonight Show.

• 10:31Speaker 02

  No, I know, but there is music involved in a lot of these shows and it could be fun to have you do the music.

• 10:37Speaker 03

  You can tender for the jingle of Bit.

• 10:39Speaker 02

  Tender?

• 10:40Speaker 03

  Yeah, because I feel like there's better musicians listening.

• 10:42Speaker 02

  Oh, come on. Yeah, well, there's better hosts for shows, but we don't have to tender you as the host. He's got you there. All right, tender the host. I mean, you've got a two-time Gold Lodi winner that you've shelved in the prize cupboard.

• 10:56Speaker 02

  You have to, oh, Guy Smiley has to be at the front. So, good call, Jack. I think you.

• 11:02Speaker 05

  I'll, I'll make some music with the assumption that I'm going to pass through.

• 11:05Speaker 03

  All right, if anyone else is out there and, and would like to also like the tender for the jingle for Bitcoin Blitz. We'll see. It's always good, Jack, and best practice to have a few quotes and a few.

• 11:17Speaker 02

  That's fair. That is fair. Andy, you gave me a mission yesterday. You said, hey, just as, because Andy was like, just so I can get my head around like, what, what kind of prizes are you thinking? I said, well, I don't know because I'm not in the zone. So Andy gave me a fake money, $10,000 dry run yesterday.

• 11:37Speaker 05

  Okay, great.

• 11:37Speaker 02

  He goes, so I was like, all right, well, probably won't be till tomorrow morning because when we chatted, this was in the afternoon. I was like, I'll wake up, I'll, you know, I'll have a coffee and I'll just see where my mind takes me.

• 11:49Speaker 03

  Give us your top three.

• 11:52Speaker 02

  There was only a few before I burnt through the 10 grand. There's some small ones, there's some big ones. I also, I, I know that my algorithm is obviously just going to be heavily slanted towards me. I do want people to know, especially, you know, when I compare what ads I get served to what my wife gets served.

• 12:10Speaker 05

  Right.

• 12:10Speaker 02

  You know, I don't want people to be like, okay, well, this is just going to be quite a lot of like golf and adventure gear.

• 12:14Speaker 05

  Yep.

• 12:15Speaker 02

  And that might not be as exciting for the, for generally speaking, for the women in the audience.

• 12:19Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 12:19Speaker 02

  I don't really want that as much. Look, I hear you, but by the same token, I am me. So I'm, it's my impulses, but I will be trying to.

• 12:29Speaker 05

  Round it out a bit.

• 12:29Speaker 02

  Keep that in mind. Keep that in mind. Keep that in mind. So everyone can feel like there's something exciting in the showcase.

• 12:34Speaker 05

  Yeah, good.

• 12:35Speaker 02

  Before I even began, there was an ad in my inbox warning me that the fastest selling golf shoes of all time had recently been re, resupplied.

• 12:48Speaker 05

  Wow.

• 12:48Speaker 02

  Because they sold out so fast the first time. That's $400. If I was in a zone of unlimited money, yes, I'm buying that.

• 12:56Speaker 05

  How much of this stuff were you tempted to buy for yourself?

• 12:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, a bit, a bit. That reminded me then, as I pretended I bought that, that I did see a pen that I meant to buy the other day online, the space pen. You know, the space pens that write upside down.

• 13:11Speaker 05

  When you're upside down. I think most pens you can write upside down though, can't you?

• 13:14Speaker 02

  You can for a little bit. Yeah, but you, this, he has sustained upside down.

• 13:19Speaker 05

  Yeah, how much is that?

• 13:20Speaker 02

  Anyway, it looks beautiful. Got the NASA logo on it.

• 13:22Speaker 05

  Nice.

• 13:22Speaker 02

  200 bucks.

• 13:23Speaker 05

  Yep.

• 13:25Speaker 03

  Nine forward it left to go.

• 13:27Speaker 02

  Then, then I, then I kind of had the thought about, okay, what, okay, this can't just be complete, just things hang once. Um, so it's going through Instagram. The first ad that got me was the vacuum sealable bags for packing.

• 13:41Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 13:41Speaker 02

  The very Andy gift.

• 13:42Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:43Speaker 02

  Right up your alley. This would be, you shouldn't, well, you could have won it, but you've bought them instead. Two hundred and thirty bucks for a set of four.

• 13:48Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 13:49Speaker 02

  Then I saw, I don't even really understand what it is.

• 13:54Speaker 02

  It was a thing called the Hulk one thousand pulsed laser cleaner. And it's a machine that fires out laser, um, kind of like, it looks like a strobe light, but it's like click, click, click, click, click, like it's firing out a laser. And they were using it on like this old wooden kind of staircase that had peeling paint on it. And it just seamlessly burns off the paint leaves.

• 14:19Speaker 03

  I'm not sure that's the thing though. I'm not sure that's.

• 14:21Speaker 02

  No, no, no.

• 14:22Speaker 03

  How much?

• 14:24Speaker 02

  They're really expensive.

• 14:26Speaker 03

  How much?

• 14:26Speaker 02

  The two hundred watt model is about six grand. How sick would that be? There are people listening to this now that, that understand what I'm talking about and they're like, yep, I, we would love.

• 14:38Speaker 03

  A laser. An interesting thing that I want to write.

• 14:40Speaker 02

  Laser.

• 14:42Speaker 03

  You, you often have bought things that when they arrived, they weren't what you'd hoped.

• 14:46Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 14:47Speaker 03

  And sometimes they don't arrive at all.

• 14:51Speaker 02

  Is there going? This was, this was from a very reputable, like industrial machinery.

• 14:55Speaker 03

  Is there going to be a booby prize in Bitcoin Blitz? Like the bankrupt sec segment when you're in Wheel of Fortune? Where you tell everybody about the prize and then go, but it was a scam. So if they, they, so if they choose it.

• 15:13Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 15:13Speaker 03

  And you go, I'm sorry, that was one of the scams.

• 15:16Speaker 02

  We make a game called Ham or Scam. And I go, I tell them about a thing I got and people have to vote ham or scam.

• 15:23Speaker 03

  Mm hmm.

• 15:24Speaker 02

  And if it was a scam and I did get ripped off, the people that voted scam, can you know, play in the next round?

• 15:30Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 15:30Speaker 02

  And the people that backed me and it did arrive, they get to play in the next round.

• 15:34Speaker 03

  Okay, great.

• 15:34Speaker 02

  Put that on the list. Anyway, that's about six grand. Then the last thing I I looked at, because I was, I was looking at my watch, which does sleep tracking, like I've got a Garmin watch. I've been getting very bad sleep scores lately and I don't think it's my fault. I think the watch is starting to die. I've had it for like four years.

• 15:49Speaker 03

  It's like a heavy watch on your wrist while you're trying to sleep.

• 15:52Speaker 02

  Nah, but I was like, I used to be doing so well and nothing's really changed, but it's, you know, like, I don't know if you do sleep scoring, but you wake up and you're like, God, I didn't, I just didn't think it was that bad. Anyway, then I remembered, oh, if we're playing this game and I had money to spend, I have been looking for a new watch. Garmin watch, not my model, but the very top of the line. Three thousand nine hundred dollars.

• 16:16Speaker 03

  You've gone over your ten.

• 16:17Speaker 02

  Yep, but here's the thing, exactly the same model, but with a slightly, not worse screen, like a still a very good screen, two, four.

• 16:26Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 16:27Speaker 02

  But just letting you know, I would be buying the four thousand dollar one.

• 16:31Speaker 02

  In the end of the game.

• 16:32Speaker 03

  I think this is good. I think we're getting a good sense of it. I don't need to know anything that you do on Golden Day.

• 16:38Speaker 02

  Are you happy with this kind of?

• 16:39Speaker 03

  Love it. I think that realm is great. I think people would love those gifts. We need to work out what they're playing for, whether they get to choose from the showcase or they just get told what they're playing for. We can work that out.

• 16:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, because it will a fortune you choose from the showcase.

• 16:53Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 16:54Speaker 02

  You go shopping, you go, I think I'll have that, I'll have that. But Price is Right, you just get the dryer.

• 16:59Speaker 03

  Yeah, so that's.

• 16:59Speaker 02

  Get the cruise.

• 17:00Speaker 03

  That's what I mean for us to circle back to. But any suggestions for the game, here's up, hamishnady.com, but we're away.

• 17:05Speaker 02

  I think, I, I think we probably have to let people choose from the showcase, don't we?

• 17:11Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 17:12Speaker 02

  I mean, it would be,

• 17:14Speaker 02

  what, what a heartbreaking scenario for someone in the crowd to be like, God, I want, I want the laser so badly because I have a lot of rust and, and material restoration. Yeah, but then if someone gets up and they really wanted roller blades.

• 17:28Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 17:28Speaker 02

  And they get the laser, then we've got a, we've got a lose, lose situation.

• 17:33Speaker 03

  I quite like the moment in, in Price is Right where, you know, you reveal it's a jet ski. And it was like, wow, great. And the other times where it's like, it's a toaster. And you see the person go, hmm. Okay, so I, I think that we, we want to make sure it's entertaining for those viewing as well to see people not happy.

• 17:50Speaker 02

  The difference is though, the difference is with a jet ski and a toaster, they're still quite general products.

• 17:54Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 17:55Speaker 02

  And I'm worried that if I've bought something very specific, like the Hulk two hundred pulse laser cleaner. That's a toughie for someone to get excited about if you're not in the market for one. All right, we'll talk back to it.

• 18:13Speaker 03

  Hey, last year I played the stain game with you guys a bit where I'd play.

• 18:18Speaker 02

  We shouldn't get this excited about something that is a hundred percent just some other radio shows segment.

• 18:24Speaker 03

  But they don't play a game.

• 18:25Speaker 02

  We gamify. We gamify, we do.

• 18:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, where there's a lady called Shannon Lush. She is the expert on removing stains. I think the show's normally at 10am on an AM station called 300W.

• 18:38Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 18:39Speaker 03

  Found out she's cheating on 300W and she also does the ABC on a weekend.

• 18:44Speaker 02

  Really?

• 18:44Speaker 03

  So she must be the go to person for stains.

• 18:46Speaker 02

  I don't know, that's fine to take your show on the road. That's, you know, she's got a, she's a stain master.

• 18:52Speaker 03

  She's a stain gun for hire. This one got sent in to me so many times. Certainly got to thank Jane because she's the one that actually sent the audio as well. But Maria, I just want to give a nod to you, those that were listening to the ABC on the weekend. Hit us up at any time as well, hamishnery.com if anything you want to ask us about 50% go to Hame, 50% go to me. I'm going to change the game today. It's only one item we're playing.

• 19:16Speaker 02

  Oh my God, here we go. And last time Jack beat me and I was a little bit annoyed and I feel like I was a bit hasty jumping in.

• 19:21Speaker 03

  And to give you guys a better chance, I've taken the guy that's rung up with his stain, but beeped out the key elements.

• 19:32Speaker 02

  Okay. As a refresher to the game, we start with her solution for the stain, don't we? Where often it's like, okay, go and get castor oil, mix it with cigarette ash, let it dry outside for two days, it will form a white paste. Take that paste, mix it with lemon.

• 19:49Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 19:49Speaker 02

  Juice.

• 19:50Speaker 03

  Roll that pair of pantyhose.

• 19:51Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 19:51Speaker 03

  Roll a pair of pantyhose.

• 19:52Speaker 02

  Rub it on softly, that kind of thing.

• 19:54Speaker 03

  Yeah. So this time I'm going to change the game a little bit. We're going to start with hearing.

• 19:59Speaker 02

  Him explain the stain.

• 20:00Speaker 03

  The explain the stain, but with key elements beeped out.

• 20:03Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 20:03Speaker 03

  Here we go.

• 20:04Speaker 06

  Al joins us from Mansfield. Al, what's your stain?

• 20:08Speaker 07

  Well, I have a rather nice [BLEEP] and it was a bit close to the [BLEEP] and God [BLEEP] spatted on it.

• 20:15Speaker 06

  Ew. Right, so you need to clean up?

• 20:19Speaker 07

  Yep.

• 20:22Speaker 02

  Maybe it's just because of the TV shows I've been watching lately. It does sound like he was just too close to a murder scene.

• 20:28Speaker 03

  Yes. So he had a rather nice something.

• 20:31Speaker 02

  Was too close to something else.

• 20:32Speaker 03

  Too close to something else.

• 20:34Speaker 02

  And it got something splattered on him.

• 20:37Speaker 03

  Okay, here is the solution that came in from Shannon.

• 20:43Speaker 06

  Okay, you're gonna hate this one. You need some female urine.

• 20:47Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 20:52Speaker 02

  Every time you hear it, you're just like, it's gonna come out that she's actually Chris Lilley or something. Like, this is a prank and it's just been going on for years and it gets wilder and wilder.

• 21:01Speaker 03

  When I first got said this, I was like, someone's AI, the funny version.

• 21:05Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 21:06Speaker 03

  And then when more people emailed in and I still had to go and verify it. I still went back through ABC iCards to go, no, no, but yes, this went to air and it's true. Any ideas on what they're trying to clean stain they're trying to get out?

• 21:23Speaker 02

  I don't like, why would?

• 21:25Speaker 03

  Splatter, splatter's making me think he's wearing something like a blazer or a top he likes. And the blended top has come off and it's splattered on him.

• 21:33Speaker 02

  Hmm. The blender top came off.

• 21:35Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 21:36Speaker 02

  That would be more of just a domestic food stain though, wouldn't it?

• 21:40Speaker 03

  Depends what he's blending.

• 21:42Speaker 02

  Got too close to the something. What is this? I think that unlocks this whole thing.

• 21:46Speaker 03

  Well, let's see. Let's keep going and.

• 21:48Speaker 02

  That's not, so it's not just urine.

• 21:49Speaker 03

  No, then there's a process where.

• 21:52Speaker 06

  So you need a litre of female urine. Put it into an ice cream container, stick it out in the sunshine until it diminishes by half.

• 22:03Speaker 03

  It reduces.

• 22:03Speaker 06

  So it evaporates by half, it goes down to half a litre. And it'll change colour and it'll change smell. It won't smell like urine anymore. It'll smell like ammonia.

• 22:13Speaker 02

  I was gonna say, I was about to go, there's high ammonia concentrated urine, but that was the ace up my sleeve. I didn't want Jack to know about. So anything, first of all, it's already not worth it to save the item. Yeah, especially saying to your wife, come on, you've got more than that in you. Cause of 400 mils. I'm not gonna wait another day. Keep drinking. Honey, I've got things to do. Drink.

• 22:37Speaker 02

  You fill this whole ice cream container up. The final part then of the remedy.

• 22:42Speaker 06

  Then you put two tablespoons of grated raw potato without the skin on. Make sure there's no skin.

• 22:49Speaker 02

  This is delicious.

• 22:49Speaker 06

  And two tablespoons of coarse salt. Stir it through and then you strain it into a cup so you can use it as a sponging material. Then roll a pair of pantyhose up in a soft ball.

• 23:00Speaker 02

  Always.

• 23:00Speaker 06

  Dip it in the solution and you wipe it in gentle strokes.

• 23:05Speaker 02

  Okay, and you can save the potatoes. Cause remember it doesn't taste like you anymore. Save those for hash browns. Cause they're salty potatoes.

• 23:14Speaker 05

  What is he fixing?

• 23:16Speaker 02

  I think it's leather. I think it's a leather couch that's a bit close to something. And got something splattered. Is it, I mean, I don't know if I love this answer, but is it a pet's urine? Are you fighting fire with fire? Urine on urine. Is it urine? My guess is maybe urine on urine.

• 23:34Speaker 05

  Okay, Jacko, what would you like to do? Splashing maybe like outdoor by a pool. Getting too close to the pool with something like maybe the barbecue close to the pool. He's cleaning the outside of the barbecue. Let's have a listen.

• 23:51Speaker 07

  Al joins us from Mansfield. Al, what's your stain? Well, I have a rather nice oil painting. And it was a bit close to the deep fryer and got oils splattered on it.

• 24:04Speaker 07

  Right, so you need to clean that?

• 24:06Speaker 02

  Not, not a problem. Not a problem, you hear it say the Louvre. Look. Hey, where are you doing the dimmies next to the Mona Lisa's? Yeah, we shouldn't have taken the shield off, but we were doing an event. We're running, we're doing, you know, decorate your own donuts and we accidentally.

• 24:23Speaker 05

  Oh, that's why you've got the ice cream container out front.

• 24:25Speaker 02

  That's why we have all the female staff out the back.

• 24:30Speaker 02

  Yes, and that's why we have those troughs.

• 24:32Speaker 05

  I'm gonna have to give it to Jack for the barbecue.

• 24:35Speaker 02

  Barbecue was grease, it was grease based.

• 24:38Speaker 05

  We will play again.

• 24:40Speaker 02

  It's the best.

• 24:47Speaker 03

  Time for some more customer service.

• 25:00Speaker 02

  It's a quality I think we all like to see in the world. And we're the only show that actively audits it. If you've got someone in your life that you would like to gusto check, to see unsuspecting how their gusto levels are. Just contact us and that's what Locky's done.

• 25:16Speaker 03

  If you're in the service business.

• 25:18Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 25:18Speaker 03

  What kind of service you're providing. It starts with gusto when you meet a potential customer.

• 25:23Speaker 02

  You simply cannot be successful in your field if you lack gusto. If you're slumping around, you're not gonna sell, you're not gonna sell many flowers that way. If you're a florist. You'll sell no flowers if you're a bricklayer, if you're slumping around. But it's still gusto of the highest importance. Locky's contact is he's gone, listen, he's got a mate, Riley, who's just joined his wife's cleaning business. Riley has joined his wife.

• 25:48Speaker 03

  Also Riley's wife.

• 25:50Speaker 02

  Riley, Riley is married to Sam. Riley and Sam have joined forces as a business. Locky's married to neither of them, but Locky is friends with Riley. So he's gone, this mate has, well, joined slash just tacked on to his wife's business. So Sam's spring cleaning was the business. So Sam's cleaning things, you know, clearing out one offs or regular work. You know, that's been her jam for some time.

• 26:17Speaker 02

  He's included the flyer here. So it's like, we are now expanding. They're offering lawn mowing, gardening, you know, yard work as well.

• 26:25Speaker 03

  So called Riley for that.

• 26:26Speaker 02

  That's the bit that Riley's tacked on to.

• 26:28Speaker 03

  Right. So he's really buying into her IP. It seemed like she had the stronger.

• 26:32Speaker 02

  Well, the business is Sam's spring cleaning.

• 26:34Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 26:35Speaker 02

  There is no sub-business here. There's, it's not Riley's lawn work. It's just, he would be working for Sam's spring cleaning.

• 26:43Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 26:44Speaker 02

  But as a new employee, you would hope that he has a lot of gusto. And that's what Locky's hoping. He said, look, I'd love you guys to do a double gusto check without them knowing. And it is, it's a gusto off between them.

• 26:56Speaker 03

  Okay. So he rings Sam. Is that what you're saying? So we ring Sam?

• 26:59Speaker 02

  Ring Sam first and quickly get, you know, I'll, why don't I just, I'll be the same person for both.

• 27:05Speaker 03

  That's

• 27:05Speaker 02

  I'll ask you three questions, three questions only. I think I'll be an old man because I think they're listeners of the show. So we'll do our best to disguise the voice.

• 27:13Speaker 03

  Great. And look, obviously we often start on greetings. That's the first one.

• 27:17Speaker 02

  I think honestly, how are you this fine day? It's a bit of an old man thing to say. And I think if someone says, how are you this fine day?

• 27:24Speaker 03

  Love it.

• 27:25Speaker 02

  A correct, that's a high gusto greeting and you'd like it to be met.

• 27:29Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:30Speaker 02

  Um.

• 27:30Speaker 03

  Then the question, what query are you going to ask about?

• 27:33Speaker 02

  I think you just go for the, you've got to go for the basic. I am tossing up whether I get you over for a one-off spring clean.

• 27:40Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 27:40Speaker 02

  Is it worth the money?

• 27:41Speaker 03

  Yeah, great.

• 27:42Speaker 02

  And why should I hire you?

• 27:43Speaker 03

  Great.

• 27:44Speaker 02

  And then at the end, I think going.

• 27:46Speaker 03

  And try and get out of the next, we're going to get through two of these.

• 27:48Speaker 02

  Well, I really hope you have a wonderful day.

• 27:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, like.

• 27:50Speaker 02

  Have a wonderful day. And the response to have a wonderful day, I think is a good indicator of gusto.

• 27:53Speaker 03

  Okay. And the goodbye. So Jack and I.

• 27:55Speaker 02

  It's a quick hit.

• 27:56Speaker 05

  So there's three marks per person.

• 27:58Speaker 03

  Three marks per person, all out of 10. Jack and I will be marking as we go and we'll review them after each. Um, old man ham.

• 28:07Speaker 02

  Good luck.

• 28:08Speaker 03

  Good luck.

• 28:09Speaker 02

  Mm hmm.

• 28:09Speaker 03

  And we're starting with, Jack, do you have Sam's?

• 28:12Speaker 02

  I've got Sam's number from the flyer. Here we go.

• 28:18Speaker 06

  Hello, Sam speaking.

• 28:20Speaker 02

  Oh, is it, uh, is it Sam's spring cleaning?

• 28:23Speaker 06

  Yes, it is. Yep.

• 28:25Speaker 02

  Rick Staisley is my name. How are you?

• 28:27Speaker 06

  Oh, good thanks. How are you? Sorry, you're calling from a, um, private number.

• 28:30Speaker 02

  Oh, yes. I've got that turned off to stop scammers.

• 28:34Speaker 06

  Yep, fair enough.

• 28:35Speaker 02

  Um, well, I'm just wondering, how are you this fine day?

• 28:39Speaker 06

  Good, thank you. How are you?

• 28:40Speaker 02

  Oh, very good, very good. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm interested in hiring your services.

• 28:45Speaker 06

  Um, yeah.

• 28:45Speaker 02

  But I, I, I sort of want a, I want a one-off spring clean.

• 28:50Speaker 06

  Um, yep.

• 28:51Speaker 02

  Albeit the wrong month. Uh, but I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm a little unsure if it's worth the money, but I, I wonder if you just tell me why I should do it. Why I should hire you?

• 29:02Speaker 06

  Um, I don't know. That's a, yep. Um, you've kind of got caught me off guard here.

• 29:09Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 29:10Speaker 06

  Um. Sorry, I'm just at home with my one year old daughter. So you've just thrown me off guard. Um.

• 29:17Speaker 02

  Times.

• 29:17Speaker 06

  Yes. Uh, yeah, I, I have literally no idea what to say right now.

• 29:25Speaker 02

  Okay, I bet you'd provide the full service.

• 29:28Speaker 06

  Of cleaning.

• 29:29Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 29:29Speaker 06

  So my normal, so obviously my, my title is Sam's Spring Cleaning.

• 29:33Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 29:33Speaker 06

  Uh, but I do, most of my clients are regulars, weekly or fortnightly, and I just do the bathrooms, the floors, um, window sills. Uh.

• 29:42Speaker 02

  I've, I've got them all. Sounds good. Yep. Okay. Well, I think I'm interested. I'll, I'll have a, I'll talk to my wife and we'll give you a call back, but I hope you have a wonderful day.

• 29:52Speaker 06

  Thank you so much. Thank you.

• 29:54Speaker 02

  Thank you.

• 29:55Speaker 06

  Thanks. Bye.

• 29:57Speaker 03

  Wow. Wow. Lots to unpack. Wow, that's, we, let's give them their scores now. I'm going to say, well done, by the way. What's, what was your name again?

• 30:08Speaker 02

  Uh, Rick, something.

• 30:10Speaker 03

  For the Rick.

• 30:12Speaker 02

  I'm about to call you Dennison.

• 30:13Speaker 03

  Um.

• 30:13Speaker 02

  I almost called myself Ralph. It took a swerve at the end and I thought if they are listeners, who knows?

• 30:20Speaker 03

  I think.

• 30:20Speaker 02

  Hear the word Ralph out of my mouth, they might identify it very quickly.

• 30:24Speaker 03

  I'm going to say greeting nine.

• 30:28Speaker 02

  High energy, high gust day.

• 30:29Speaker 03

  After you said how your day, she was surprised and matched you, actually went past it.

• 30:34Speaker 02

  I think people like to hear how are you this fine day. Reminds you that each day is a, is a blessing.

• 30:39Speaker 03

  Yep, yep. Promoting her business, the second one.

• 30:43Speaker 02

  I admit I threw her for a loop because it, it's.

• 30:47Speaker 03

  Nah. I, I don't think it's, it wasn't that much of a difficult question.

• 30:52Speaker 02

  It wasn't. She's a working mom. I mean, she's there with her one year old. I've called her in the middle of childcare.

• 30:58Speaker 03

  I'm giving her a generous four. I gave her a two. Yeah, I think it's more accurate.

• 31:03Speaker 02

  It was, I mean, look, the door was wide open to go, look, you've never seen a house as clean as this. You're going to love it.

• 31:08Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 31:08Speaker 02

  And.

• 31:09Speaker 03

  What, what are you going with him? Three then?

• 31:11Speaker 02

  Yeah, look, I mean, I'm, I'm, I just sympathize. I mean, she had her hands full. As soon as you hear, I've got a one year old here, mate. I'm not really interested in selling you a one off clean. I do, I do.

• 31:23Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 31:24Speaker 02

  It's a three.

• 31:25Speaker 03

  But then the goodbye.

• 31:26Speaker 02

  Even just, even just as a husband, I was like, I've got to get off the phone here. This is, I'm wasting this one. This is not what she wants to be doing.

• 31:34Speaker 03

  I'm going to give her a 10 for the goodbye.

• 31:36Speaker 02

  Goodbye was lovely, wasn't it?

• 31:37Speaker 03

  10 out of 10.

• 31:38Speaker 02

  Augusta was high, I think, because she didn't want to talk to Rick anymore. I think it was more excitement to, to get off the phone with Rick. So what have you, what have you guys scored her there?

• 31:48Speaker 03

  It's, it's a nine, a three and a 10. It takes it a 22 out of 30.

• 31:53Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 31:54Speaker 03

  It is good to note that finishing on a 10 does leave you with a good taste in your mouth, though. Because now when I think back to the call, I think, oh, she was nice. Even though in the middle, I've got a two out of 10 in here. That is so true. It's like when you're looking at the moguls and they put 50% on the aerial and weighted versus the knee work or something like that.

• 32:12Speaker 02

  That's a great reference. Look, I mean, even in a Winter Olympics year, it's a.

• 32:20Speaker 02

  It's a method. Had you done that, had you done that two years ago, you would have probably, we would have slumped. We would have slumped for a show.

• 32:31Speaker 03

  Gone.

• 32:33Speaker 02

  No, leave it in.

• 32:34Speaker 03

  Go for it.

• 32:36Speaker 02

  All right, well, let's see, let's see how Riley goes. Um, hopefully they're not in the same house on speakerphone.

• 32:42Speaker 03

  I doubt it because she wouldn't have gone, I've got here a one year old and been worried about it. If he was there, I'd be able to help her.

• 32:48Speaker 02

  That's true, that's true.

• 32:50Speaker 03

  But marking on the same things, I imagine. Yeah, greeting.

• 32:52Speaker 02

  Going to try and do the same script.

• 32:54Speaker 03

  The question. As possible. And the goodbye. Here we go, Riley.

• 33:02Speaker 02

  Hello.

• 33:04Speaker 03

  Oh, hello, is that, is that Sam's spring cleaning?

• 33:07Speaker 02

  No, it's not, sorry.

• 33:09Speaker 03

  So I've got your number here as.

• 33:10Speaker 02

  Oh, that's my. I'm actually hoping to, is this the yard work? I've got some yard work I need doing. Are you the fellow in charge of that?

• 33:21Speaker 05

  Ah, yes, yeah, yeah, yep.

• 33:23Speaker 02

  What's your name?

• 33:25Speaker 05

  Riley, sorry. Where are you local?

• 33:29Speaker 02

  Yes, yes, yes, I am. I just saw, I just, I just got your number off Facebook.

• 33:34Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah, no worries.

• 33:36Speaker 02

  Rick's my name. Well, first of all, sorry. How are you this fine day?

• 33:40Speaker 05

  No, not bad, mate.

• 33:43Speaker 02

  Well, I'm looking, getting a sort of a one-off, um, full yard do-over. I've got a bit of bracken overgrown and lawn stuff and I'm probably getting a bit old for it. I'm unsure if it's, if it's, if it's worth the money. I do want a good job done, but I suppose my question to you is why are you the right man for the job?

• 34:05Speaker 05

  Well, I'll get it done, I guess, but where are you based? Where are you living?

• 34:10Speaker 02

  At the moment, I'm at my sister's house because the house is quite a.

• 34:13Speaker 05

  Where's, where's your house? Because I can come and have a look at it if you want.

• 34:16Speaker 02

  I appreciate that.

• 34:18Speaker 05

  Let me know.

• 34:19Speaker 02

  Okay, well, actually, why don't I give you a buzz back and, um, and then I'll arrange a time to meet there. Um, let me give you a call back in 10 minutes. Is that all right?

• 34:27Speaker 05

  No worries at all.

• 34:29Speaker 02

  I hope you have a wonderful day.

• 34:31Speaker 05

  You too.

• 34:37Speaker 02

  Now, not a hundred percent.

• 34:38Speaker 03

  Oh, you're in your sister's house.

• 34:42Speaker 02

  Got no idea where these guys are.

• 34:44Speaker 05

  No, we got, we got, we got the right amount. We got all we needed from Riley. Um, I'm giving his greeting a four. That was generous.

• 34:53Speaker 02

  It was cursed, wasn't it?

• 34:54Speaker 05

  It was cursed and when you said this is Sam's Spring Cleaning and his number is on the flyer.

• 35:00Speaker 02

  He said no.

• 35:02Speaker 05

  It's an odd thing to say.

• 35:04Speaker 02

  He's forgotten that he's added himself to the business.

• 35:08Speaker 03

  So that's problematic.

• 35:09Speaker 02

  He's left. Yeah, unless it's an old flyer. Okay.

• 35:12Speaker 03

  Four, is he the man for the job? Can you give him a six?

• 35:17Speaker 02

  Yeah, I actually, I liked, I mean, it was brief, but I liked his rationale.

• 35:22Speaker 03

  Yeah. Get the job done and I'll come and have a look at it. You get extra points for that.

• 35:26Speaker 02

  That is.

• 35:26Speaker 03

  So maybe, should it be seven?

• 35:27Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 35:28Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 35:28Speaker 02

  I'd go seven or eight for that. And I, but I think, you know, again, partly the question, the, the, the question is to blame there. If someone called, if you're doing yard work and someone calls you and goes, why should I hire you? Because I'll do it, mate.

• 35:40Speaker 03

  Yeah, but I think.

• 35:40Speaker 02

  I said I'd do it and I'll do it. I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna come over and just play electric guitar in your backyard and leave.

• 35:49Speaker 02

  Why do you think you should hire me?

• 35:52Speaker 03

  I still think you've got an opportunity for a customer there and you can go, yep, we're the best at this.

• 35:57Speaker 02

  This is, this is where he excels.

• 35:58Speaker 03

  I love long grass. I can do the edges. That's a great customer.

• 36:02Speaker 02

  Never had a pollen issue in my life. Rub my face and it doesn't bother me.

• 36:06Speaker 03

  The goodbye, sorry to say, so one. It's the first time I've ever given a one.

• 36:12Speaker 02

  Kurt.

• 36:13Speaker 03

  It was Kurt, wasn't it?

• 36:14Speaker 02

  I think, I think again, I'm gonna play the sympathetic card here and go because he's had a man here refuse to tell him his address. So you'd be, as a, as someone running a small business, you go, okay, well, I don't know how likely this is gonna be, that this is a job.

• 36:29Speaker 03

  Okay, we'll give it, we'll give him a.

• 36:31Speaker 02

  Yeah, give him a two.

• 36:32Speaker 03

  A two? You're a red flag customer at that stage.

• 36:34Speaker 02

  That's exactly right.

• 36:35Speaker 03

  Why can't you just say your address? It's thirteen out of thirty though. It's, it's, it's less than a half.

• 36:42Speaker 02

  Yeah, Sam's got him.

• 36:43Speaker 03

  Yeah. Do we want to, do we want to ring back them both or at least Sam and just say, are you sure about adding Riley?

• 36:51Speaker 02

  I think we gotta call Sam back.

• 36:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah. Give Sam another buzz.

• 37:00Speaker 06

  Hello.

• 37:01Speaker 03

  Sam.

• 37:01Speaker 02

  Sam, it's Hamish and Andy here. How are you going?

• 37:05Speaker 06

  Oh my God!

• 37:08Speaker 06

  What is happening?

• 37:09Speaker 03

  Well, you've just submitted-

• 37:11Speaker 02

  Did a very realistic old man called Rick call you a few minutes ago.

• 37:17Speaker 03

  Yeah. You've just been subjected to a gusto check, Sam, for your business.

• 37:23Speaker 06

  Oh my God.

• 37:24Speaker 03

  I'm not sure if you've ever heard us do gusto checks before, but this is where we check whether the people and their small businesses are answering the phones and offering service with the right amount of gusto that's going to entice customers to come and use them.

• 37:35Speaker 06

  Well, I failed because I couldn't even give him an answer.

• 37:37Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 37:38Speaker 02

  No, well, you'd be surprised. You'd be surprised, Sam, because your husband's mate, Locky, has nominated you guys to go-

• 37:46Speaker 06

  Oh!

• 37:47Speaker 02

  Be like Riley's, you know, he's recently added himself to Sam's Spring Cleaning as the head of garden work. And Locky was like, "I think you need to do a gusto check to both of them to see who's got the most gusto." So we called you and then we called, then we called your husband Riley.

• 38:04Speaker 03

  And because obviously he's being added to your business, it seems, from the way we can see it, we wanted to make sure that he's reaching the marks that you have set and the level you've set as far as gusto. You got a 22 out of 30. Yes, in the middle, where you didn't quite know what to say, definitely, to sell your own business. It was your only misstep.

• 38:23Speaker 02

  Gusto is not knowledge. Gusto is an attitude.

• 38:27Speaker 03

  But your greeting and your goodbye were outstanding.

• 38:30Speaker 06

  Oh, thank you so much.

• 38:32Speaker 03

  Riley on the other hand-

• 38:33Speaker 06

  Oh my God.

• 38:33Speaker 03

  We've got more nervous news to give you. I mean, obviously, how long has Riley been working underneath your business name?

• 38:41Speaker 06

  Oh, it's like a month. It was just like a side gig. He has a full-time job. He was just gonna come and help do the launch.

• 38:47Speaker 03

  How's it feel? How's it feeling as a- The new kind of setup.

• 38:51Speaker 06

  As in with him?

• 38:52Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 38:53Speaker 06

  It's, um, it's, we don't work together, obviously, because I don't think I could do that. Love him, but you know.

• 38:59Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 39:00Speaker 06

  Um, you know, it's, it is going well. We make, because a lot of end of lease cleans, a lot of people are selling their properties and stuff. Like, we do get quite a bit of business luckily.

• 39:07Speaker 03

  Okay, but are you seeing results from Riley's side?

• 39:11Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, he's fantastic. It was actually my idea. So, yeah.

• 39:15Speaker 02

  Would you say you're his boss? Are we talking to Riley's boss here? Because, I mean, he works for Sam's Spring Cleaning. It's not Riley's yard work. It's like.

• 39:22Speaker 06

  Well, I pay, I pay him, so I guess I am the boss.

• 39:25Speaker 02

  Okay, well, then it breaks our heart a bit to tell his boss he did not score as highly as you in the gusto check.

• 39:35Speaker 06

  Oh, no. How do I fire somebody I love so much?

• 39:38Speaker 03

  I know.

• 39:42Speaker 02

  But the good news is it's not our job. That's your job. So, good luck.

• 39:50Speaker 02

  Ando, you, I mean, you're obviously well aware, you've been, you've had a front row seat for nearly 25 years to how I live my life. Um, as a fast and loose man.

• 40:00Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 40:00Speaker 02

  And as, as time goes on, it's not changing.

• 40:04Speaker 03

  No, that was, that's been the most surprising thing I, I gotta say. I did suspect some behaviours of the 19-year-old Hame you'd grown out of.

• 40:14Speaker 02

  I mean, some, I guess I've grown out of, but in terms of, yeah.

• 40:18Speaker 03

  Oh, you've grown out of a lot of them, but I'm saying there were some behaviours that I liked.

• 40:20Speaker 02

  The fast and looseness.

• 40:21Speaker 03

  The fast and looseness, I thought you'd get past that at some point.

• 40:24Speaker 02

  And just in terms of the belief, the dominant, the driving part, the part of my brain that is running the show, the belief it has that it can do what it, what it's said, what it's told people it can do. The belief it has is in its own plans, but I want you to know, I realised something the other day. I have this, this over optimistic, um, person driving my brain.

• 40:49Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 40:49Speaker 02

  There's, that, that's, that's who's in control. Because I realised the other day.

• 40:55Speaker 02

  I would gen it. I had something cancelled on me at the last minute, sort of like an hour long appointment. And it made my day kind of reshuffle. And I, I was sort of like, just comfortably on time to everything for the rest of the day. And it was, I'm always about 10 minutes late. And I'm all, I like, I've always just mistimed everything. And I thought, this is actually, I actually need to invent an app that I book my calendar and then it takes one thing out of the day. And it, and it, and it emails, maybe I can get AI to do this. And it emails that person going, hey, Hamish doesn't know this has happened. Yes. He doesn't get to select what gets deleted. Um, but from experience, he does put 110% too much in the day. This is great. You've been selected today to be cancelled. We'll find another time for you. And meanwhile,

• 41:40Speaker 02

  then I would be there going, this is about the right amount of things for the day. But if left to my own devices, I put too many in. But here's something I want you to know, Ando. I realized the other day that whilst this fast and loose guy drives my brain, you are, I have another voice in there. It doesn't get a say, doesn't get a vote, not allowed to touch the steering wheel or the pedals. But the other voice is in there. And I think it's you. I think it's your voice. And it, it will comment throughout the day in a kind way. And I, it's often kind of just surprised, a little bit surprised at what the driver's doing.

• 42:18Speaker 02

  So what kind of comments will I make? It won't go, it won't be as direct as going like, don't do that. It'll be more like, oh, okay. I wonder how that's, okay, well, you know, you're the driver. So it doesn't backseat drive, but it's also not going, yeah, I can see what you're doing. Yeah. For example, the other day, I was again, running a little bit late. And I was starving. And I thought to myself, I'm going to need to get a food that I can eat whilst moving. So I was sort of in the city and I was like, okay, well, that rules out. Can't have a bowl. Can't have something you might need chopsticks for. I need a one-handed food. And I bought a massive schnitzel burger.

• 43:01Speaker 02

  I was also going to somewhere where I needed to turn up. Presentable. Semi-presentable was a meeting. Now, so I buy the massive schnitzel burger. My head goes, great, this will, I'll turn up well fed. Yum, yum, yum. That looks great. I'm very excited to eat this. That's the driver. You in my head go, oh, okay. Are you sure that's the right thing to eat with one hand while you're driving? And the driver in my brain goes, yeah, this will be great. We're so excited about this burger. And you're like, okay, that's not how I would do it. I would, I wouldn't have, I wouldn't have. It's like the tone, you remember when you were a kid and you go to a friend's house for the first time? And you're like, oh, okay. We don't do it like that in our house.

• 43:46Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 43:47Speaker 02

  Like you're kind of like, oh my God, can you guys just have paddle pops after dinner? Like we, we're gonna do it, that's not, that's not how things work in our house. Anyway, eating the massive schnitzel. Some unfortunately did get loose and kind of your cascades down the front of the top. And it was hot. So again, I'm getting an oil burn through my shorts.

• 44:07Speaker 03

  And did you have any napkins down, anything like catching?

• 44:12Speaker 02

  No, down.

• 44:14Speaker 03

  If I find myself in that situation, I've got napkins in the car for all those.

• 44:20Speaker 02

  Clean ones.

• 44:23Speaker 02

  Cause yeah, I've got napkins in the car, mate, but they're covered in two week old chipotle. I don't have clean napkins to lay down in the car. But a serial killer that carries around like a little tarp in case I'm gonna make a mess. No, I mean, but then you're in my head going, and again, to your credit, it doesn't go told you so.

• 44:43Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 44:44Speaker 02

  It goes, oh, yeah.

• 44:48Speaker 02

  We did worry that might happen, didn't we? And then my driver, the person driving my brain will often be like, well, you could have been a little bit more vocal. And you're like, well, I don't really get a vote, so just.

• 44:58Speaker 03

  Well, my theory, the assumption for me was you would grow out of these things because when we were younger, it's like, oh, he hasn't collected enough data to realise that this is probably the wrong way to approach it. Twenty five years of friendship later, I feel like you've seen most scenarios multiple times. So what is your brain thinking?

• 45:17Speaker 02

  I got this.

• 45:19Speaker 03

  The last time, what, the last six times was unlucky?

• 45:22Speaker 02

  Yep. No, this one, this will work. And I just, I think I just love a high risk, high reward scenario.

• 45:28Speaker 03

  There's no, there's not that high a reward.

• 45:30Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah, you eat a huge schnitzel, you're on time and you feel great.

• 45:38Speaker 01

  Thanks for listening. The Hamish and Andy podcast will return next week. Catch up or contribute at hamishandandy.com.