How to Write a Letter Someone Will Keep for Life | Lindsay Hurty

There is a letter most of us keep meaning to write, and never do. Lindsay Hurty has spent her adult life writing the ones other people put off, and she makes a case that the part of a life we account for least carefully is the part that matters most. Lindsay is a Harvard-trained former high school English teacher who left the classroom for motherhood, started writing one line a day to her newborn daughter, and ended up building a practice around it. She co-founded Everwell, has designed and led more than 350 programs, and now helps people write legacy letters, launch letters, and life letters to the people they love. She came to this work through a story involving her eighth-grade math teacher, a mailbox, and a conversation that found her five years after he died. In this conversation, you’ll explore: The five types of letters she teaches, and the one most people have never heard of until someone diesWhat a dying teacher’s family learned about him from an envelope a 14-year-old left in their mailboxThe five-part structure that turns a blank page into something you can actually finishWhy the thing you write at the very end usually belongs at the beginningThe question she asks anyone who says writing a letter to their own spouse would feel too awkwardWhat to write on a note card when a full letter feels like far too much Somewhere in your life there is a person who has no idea what they mean to you, and this is the hour that gets you to tell them. If you LOVED this episode, you can find the 1-page worksheet HERE. https://good-life-project-inc.kit.com/2866be91c0 You can find Lindsay at: Website https://lindsayhurty.com/ | Substack https://lindsayhurty.substack.com/ | Instagram https://www.instagram.com/lindsay_everwell/ | Episode Transcript https://www.goodlifeproject.com/podcast/how-to-write-a-meaningful-letter-to-someone-you-love-lindsay-hurty Miss the magic of camp? We’re launching Good Life Pop-Ups in 2027: one-day gatherings full of insight, joy, and real connection. Where should we go first? Vote now! https://goodlifeproject.typeform.com/to/XgLuykUo Check out our sponsors and resources: Visit Our Sponsor Page https://www.goodlifeproject.com/sponsors/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy https://acast.com/privacy for more information.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Jonathan Fields?

  So what if the most meaningful thing that you could do for someone you care about is simply to write them a letter? A few honest words, written by hand, maybe, to someone you love? Even if you're not a writer? What if a few words could literally change both of your lives? Our guest today is Lindsay Hurty. She spent years as a high school English teacher before stepping away to raise three kids. On the day her first child was born, she started writing her a tiny letter. One line a day, every day for five years. Today, she helps people write the letters that matter most. Love letters that live alongside a will or just a love letter in general. Letters that mark big life's turning points or the small notes that maybe we keep meaning

• 0:44Jonathan Fields?

  to send but kind of never do. The ones that would mean so much more than almost anything else that we could do. In this conversation, Lindsay walks us through the five types of letters she believes all of us can write and the simple five-part structure that makes them doable even if you're convinced that you are a terrible writer. And she has something to say about that, too, on behalf of every English teacher, whoever made you feel that way. But it all traces back to one letter that Lindsay wrote at 14, to a math teacher who stopped her in a school hallway and told her he was dying. Years later, she wrote him a second letter. He passed away five days after she mailed it, and she never heard back.

• 1:26Jonathan Fields?

  And then, years later, in a scene straight out of a movie, his daughter came running down a different hallway towards her with something she needed to say, and it changed the direction of Lindsay's life. You'll also hear Lindsay read the very first and very last entries from that five-year journal I mentioned, and I'll share the story of the one book that I've written that will only ever exist as a single copy. So pull up a chair and maybe grab a pen or a pencil and a piece of paper. So excited to share this conversation with you. I'm Jonathan Fields, and this is Good Life Project. And we'll dive right in after this short break.

• 2:09Jonathan Fields?

  You ever wish you could just step out of the screen and into a room of warm and wise and amazingly kind human beings? We are bringing back the magic of our beloved camp with Good Life You Pop-Ups. One-day gatherings packed with deep insights and joy and real connection. We're launching in 2027, and we want to know, where should we visit first? Tap the link in the show notes to vote in our quick poll and tell us where to go. Can't wait to see you there.

• 2:36Jonathan Fields?

  This message is brought to you by Apple Card. Ah, fall, that cozy season where we swap the swimwear for sweaters and sunnies for scars. But before the Halloween decorations are put away or Thanksgiving table has been set, there's already holly jolly music playing in the grocery store, reminding you that the year is coming to a close. Time to kick end of year into high gear. When you use Apple Card with Apple Pay, you earn 2% daily cash back on all purchases, including food, decorations, gifts, and more. Get a head start on your end of year purchases. Apply for your Apple Card in the Wallet app on your iPhone today and start using it right away with Apple Pay. Subject to credit approval, Apple Card is issued by Goldman Sachs Bank USA, Salt Lake

• 3:21Jonathan Fields?

  City Branch. Terms and more at applecard.com. Good Life Project is supported by Peloton. So full honesty here, I am not a runner, never really have been. I'm a hiker. Give me a trail, some elevation, and a few hours, and I am genuinely happy. But here's the thing about the Peloton Tread Flex that really got my attention. It's not really pitched at runner so much as it is at people who just want to move, walk, hike in place, or let a walk turn into a jog if the day feels right. No pressure to perform, just movement on your terms. And incredibly convenient, no matter what life or the weather brings you. The new Peloton Tread Flex is built for this. It's foldable and movable. It fits into an actual home, not the home gym that most people don't actually have.

• 4:06Jonathan Fields?

  Everybody's got a corner. Just roll it out, walk, hike, jog if you're feeling it, and then roll it right back where it came from. And once you're on it, you've got instructors who feel more like friends than drill surgeons with programs for wherever you're starting, from call yourself a runner if you're just getting into it, all the way to full race training if that's your world. Let yourself run. Explore the new Peloton Tread Flex at onpeloton.com. It is so good to be hanging out with you. You and I have been in each other's orbits for a number of years now. You were a part of our, in the Sparkade days for me, the Certified Advisor Program. You've been out there doing amazing work in the world.

• 4:47Jonathan Fields?

  If we take a step back in time, you spent a chunk of your professional life as a teacher, teaching kids English.

• 4:57Jonathan Fields?

  Brave job.

• 4:59Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 5:02Jonathan Fields?

  At some point, though, you switched gears, and you said, there's this thing out there also called letter writing. It's not a new thing. It's been around for a million years, but this became a focus of yours. Take me into this evolution.

• 5:22Speaker 01

  Well, I loved being a high school English teacher. I loved the job. It's something, though, that when I became a mom, I had this moment where I thought, will I be able to do both well? And I'm someone who holds myself to a standard where if it's not going to be done well, I'd rather not do it. And motherhood was this thing that I was a kid who dreamed about becoming a mom. When I grew up, I wanted to be a mom more than anything else. So it felt like an opportunity that I needed to be most present for. So I left teaching for parenthood. And when I was pregnant with my first child, I have three, I was in a local bookshop and

• 6:06Speaker 01

  I saw this five-year line-a-day journal. And I plucked it off the shelf and I-

• 6:15Jonathan Fields?

  What does that mean?

• 6:16Speaker 01

  So it's an actual journal that each page is one day of the year. And there's a little chunk on each page for a year going five, like five chunks. So you can write a journal entry every single day of the year and only take up the top fifth of the page.

• 6:32Jonathan Fields?

  So like, literally, like, basically write one line?

• 6:34Speaker 01

  There's room for one line, but yes, you can write really small and have a few sentences. And I thought, this, it was called like a mom's line-a-day journal. And I thought, this is perfect for me because I knew I was going to be leaving my career for, temporarily, probably, for parenthood. And I thought, this is a great homework assignment for me because everyone says flies by, but I think substantive stuff will happen. So I, on the day my daughter was born, I picked up this empty journal and I wrote my first entry. And I wrote it in the form of a letter to my child who was born that day.

• 7:15Jonathan Fields?

  Like a really short, sweet-

• 7:17Speaker 01

  A really short, "You were born today."

• 7:19Jonathan Fields?

  The first line?

• 7:22Speaker 01

  I actually brought the journal with me to show you. I pulled it out of my fire safe suitcase to bring it to show you. Would you like to see it?

• 7:28Jonathan Fields?

  I would love to.

• 7:29Speaker 01

  I'll show you. The handwriting's so small, I have to put on my reading glasses. So this, "Mom's-"

• 7:34Jonathan Fields?

  It's so teeny and thick.

• 7:35Speaker 01

  "One line a day."

• 7:37Jonathan Fields?

  And for those listening, it's holding up this, kind of like, almost like a quilted cover type of journal with gold edges, and it's fairly small but really thick.

• 7:47Speaker 01

  So you can see it's filled.

• 7:50Jonathan Fields?

  Wow.

• 7:51Speaker 01

  And every year I changed the color. You could see that.

• 7:55Jonathan Fields?

  I can see it. It's different colors, and it's really teeny writing?

• 7:58Speaker 01

  It's tiny writing. I can't even read it without my reading glasses now as I'm 16 years-

• 8:03Jonathan Fields?

  Would you be open to reading the very first entry?

• 8:06Speaker 01

  Sure. I haven't read it in so long, but it was November 19th. Okay. This is 2010. And then, we were three. You arrived at 5:05 a.m. today, and our hearts are permanently bigger now.

• 8:26Speaker 01

  You were born at home, and you've already met all four of your grandparents and your Aunt Jenny. You are our miracle.

• 8:36Jonathan Fields?

  Does it make you feel, just seeing and reading that now?

• 8:40Speaker 01

  It's, it takes me right back, of course. And I didn't even really realize I was writing her a letter. You know, that's, you asked how I got into letter writing, and it was, it's so part of me that I didn't even notice that I was writing letters. Because I did this for all three of my kids, every day of their lives for the first five years. Although, I'll be truthful, my third kid got three and a half years because I got really burnt out. And so that started, and so letter writing was just in me from the get-go. And I feel, how does it make me feel? I feel grateful that I can revisit that person that I was.

• 9:23Speaker 01

  I treasure this because should my child become a parent, she'll have access to me at the same stage.

• 9:32Jonathan Fields?

  Oh, wow.

• 9:33Speaker 01

  Which we change so much in life. So I could look back at this time through a reminiscent lens and speak wisdom. But being in it, as we all remember who our parents is, very different.

• 9:47Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah.

• 9:48Speaker 01

  It's like this connection on a different level that you have with your parent. So I feel, it wasn't something I set out thinking, I'm going to create a piece of legacy here. It was more the person in me who wanted to prove that every day was substantive because, like a lot of parents who choose to be a full-time, home-based parent and interrupt your career path for it, there's judgment and stigma, and a lot of people think that that's pure luxury. And to me, and I'm not saying it's not for some, you know, but for me, I took it very seriously, I still do.

• 10:28Speaker 01

  It's a huge part of my purpose at this stage of my midlife, and it has been for the last 16 years. And I wanted for myself to show myself that every single day, there was value to it in this job.

• 10:43Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah. So when you're writing, when you start writing these tiny little, like, micro letters, are you writing to yourself or to your kid?

• 10:53Speaker 01

  In all of them, I found myself writing to them. I remember having this conscious moment of I want them to have access to who they were through their mother's lens. Because I knew them like nobody else did, and they were too young to have their own consciousness. So they might have vague memories of their first five years. But I wanted them to be able to see them. Later in life, I want them to be able to see themselves more fully in that formative stage.

• 11:24Jonathan Fields?

  That makes sense.

• 11:26Speaker 01

  So I wrote it to them. I wanted them to be self, almost like a mirror, trying to be a mirror to them.

• 11:32Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah. Would you be open to, so you just shared the very first mini letter that you wrote to your first child. Would you be open to sharing the last one?

• 11:42Speaker 01

  Absolutely. I actually, when I finished her album, I mean, her journal, I felt a little lost, to be honest. I had two more children at that point, and I still had their journals to write in, but those were to them. And I ended up writing her a longer letter that I, I started an email address for her that she didn't access until much later, until she was 14. It is her email address today. But I wrote the first email to that email address on her fifth birthday, when there was no more room in this journal, because I wanted it to be a marker.

• 12:24Speaker 01

  And that's actually become something, I call these life letters that I help people write, is markers in time that aren't necessarily monumental, but you want to capture a time in life that right now is what it is, but will someday be the past. And so I can read you what I wrote in the journal. I also happen to have the letter that I wrote her right after that, if you'd like.

• 12:48Jonathan Fields?

  You showed up, you had the teacher in you.

• 12:51Speaker 01

  I brought props.

• 12:52Jonathan Fields?

  I'm showing up prepared.

• 12:53Speaker 01

  I had no idea. This, your conversations always go down the most interesting path. All right. So this is the night before her fifth birthday on November 18th, 2015. It was a Wednesday. I'm sad to complete this entry, as it marks such a real closing chapter to a part of our lives. Good night, goodbye to age four. Goodbye, sweet pink journal that's walked with us through every single day of your first five years of life. We went to see The Lion King tonight, after sharing your first frozen hot chocolate at Serendipity. It was magical experiencing that with you, and will forever be imprinted as one of my favorite memories.

• 13:38Speaker 01

  On this, my final entry, darling Penelope Kate, I want you to know, being your mom is the luckiest, most treasured thing that will ever happen to me.

• 13:48Jonathan Fields?

  Hmm.

• 13:50Speaker 01

  So.

• 13:52Jonathan Fields?

  How's that?

• 13:54Speaker 01

  It's just, it feels perfect to know that I was able to capture that then, and that's preserved. I mean, time moves forward with all the people in our relationships and our lives. And one thing I've learned as a writer who really enjoys capturing small moments of everyday life and exploding that into meaning, is that if, when you write it in the moment, you capture things that you simply forget as time goes on.

• 14:30Speaker 01

  And then it can start to feel generalized, or we, we kind of put it into cliches. But then if you, if you actually sit down and write the thing you're feeling in the moment, it's more raw. It's real. It captures something that's so pure about a moment, you know? Like visiting an old friend.

• 14:56Jonathan Fields?

  I love that, that notion of visiting an old friend. And we'll be right back after a word from our sponsors. Good Life Project is sponsored by Quince. So these days, I tend to want fewer things made well. That's how I'm thinking about gifts this year, and it's why Quince is on my list. So Quince makes elevated everyday essentials from premium materials like Mongolian cashmere, organic cotton, and stretch denim at 50 to 80% less than similar brands. Cashmere sweaters that start at just $50, they work directly with ethical factories and cut out the middlemen. Our executive producer, Lindsay, actually just ordered their organic cotton denim chore jacket in indigo blue, her verdict, dreamy and soft. She also grabbed Quince's bees oil wood conditioner.

• 15:41Jonathan Fields?

  It's made in the USA from beeswax and mineral oil. It's food safe, and it's lovely on cutting boards and bowls. And I actually just got the yummiest button down from Quince, which is great as the weather gets cooler. So give the gift of quality this holiday season. Download the Quince app for app exclusive authors, or go to quince.com. Get free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK too. And when Quince asks where you heard about us, let them know it was Good Life Project. It's the best way to support the show. Good Life Project is sponsored by Fair. So my wife Stephanie has a gift for finding the most beautifully created little shops. We'll pop in for one thing, and 20 minutes later, she's holding something perfect while I'm hearing just the whole story of who made it. And here's what I've come to love about shopping small.

• 16:26Jonathan Fields?

  Nothing feels random. Someone shows every single thing on those shelves, and you can feel it. Back when I ran a yoga studio in New York, I learned that what you put on your shelf shapes who walks through your door and who keeps coming back. That's why I'm glad Fair exists. So Fair is a wholesale marketplace connecting independent retailers with over 100,000 unique brands worldwide. Eligible retailers get 60 day interest free payment terms, plus free returns on first orders with every brand. So trying something new feels a lot less risky, just in time to plan your holiday shelves. Sign up today and get 50% off your first wholesale order, up to $100, at F A I R E dot com slash Good Life. That's F A I R E dot com slash Good Life.

• 17:10Jonathan Fields?

  Terms may apply. You ever wish you could just step out of the screen and into a room of warm and wise and amazingly kind human beings? We are bringing back the magic of our beloved camp with Good Life U pop ups. One day gatherings packed with deep insights and joy and real connection. We're launching in 2027, and we want to know, where should we visit first? Tap the link in the show notes to vote in our quick poll and tell us where to go. Can't wait to see you there. Letter writing for you also is, I mean, this, this was an example of, you know, you starting to write these tiny little letters to your kids every day for five years. But there's an older, bigger practice embedded in this for you.

• 17:54Jonathan Fields?

  And there is a story from years before that is, when I first heard you tell it, just so deeply moved me. Would you, would you take us there?

• 18:03Speaker 01

  I'd be happy to. So I'm going to take you back a few decades. And I was in my late twenties, high school English teacher. And I'm walking down the corridor that's empty. It's between classes. I'm headed to the photocopier. And I hear my name being yelled from all the way down the hallway. Lindsay, Lindsay. And I look up and it's Regina. She is a new math teacher. We're not close, but she's running towards me. She's on a mission and I'm somehow involved. And although we're not close, we have a connection. And that is that her dad was my middle school math teacher, Mr. Minor.

• 18:47Speaker 01

  And I loved Mr. Minor. And when she and I first met, when she was at teacher orientation, I brought up, the connection was made, and I brought up that I had been her dad's student. And to be honest, she received me, it was, it was very passive, reserved. She was very reserved about it, almost cold. And I thought, oh, I get it. I mean, this was her dad. And I had been his student 15 years before. So I didn't tell her any of my stories of remembering her dad, but he was the best. I mean, in middle school, I actually had him for two years, seventh and eighth grade. And when, you know, middle school is middle school. We all know it.

• 19:31Speaker 01

  It's a yucky, hard time. But we would go into his classroom, and he was someone who was seemingly very cranky, but he was super sharp and just impossibly funny, always. Every day, we could count on that. And it just, being in his classroom, I think every time we walked in, we felt intimidated, but lucky. So it was this, it was this fabulous pull for a middle schooler of, I get to be here, but oh my gosh, I'm nervous. Humbled, I guess. And so he would do things that just got us all laughing. So for instance, on the first day of school, he said to us, because the class was set up in a very classic way, rows separated, and he was facing us at the teacher's desk.

• 20:16Speaker 01

  And he said, I'm going to be sitting in my seat this entire year, but there will be one day when I will get up and I am going to clap my hands and I'm going to say, okay, kids, it's time for oral math. This is the day that the principal comes in to observe me as a teacher. So what we're, you're going to do is I'm going to start rattling off math equations. You're not going to understand any of it. And I'm going to go and go and go. And I want you to look as eager as you've ever looked, like you're following completely along. And then I'm going to say, who has the answer? I want you all to shoot your hands in the air, and I'm going to call on one of you, and you're going to say something, anything. And I'm going to say, you got it. And I want the rest of you to go, yes, as if that was what you were thinking too. Because then the principal will know that I'm good at my job.

• 20:58Jonathan Fields?

  Oh, I love that.

• 20:59Speaker 01

  And so he just did stuff like that all the time. He just, he treated us like we were capable of maturing, and he let us in on the secret truth that sometimes even adults make stuff up. And he also was really, really good at teaching us math, hard math, algebra, you know, that stuff that you look at it at first and you feel like you can't figure it out, and then you get there. And it just, it was beautiful. It like in middle school, when everything is so open ended and strange, math being so beautiful felt so perfect. I just loved it.

• 21:38Speaker 01

  And Mr. Minor often bragged about never taking a sick day in his 20 years of teaching. And so in my eighth grade year, when he missed a day, and then a week, and then it turned into a long term sub for a month, we all noticed.

• 21:55Speaker 01

  And one day, I was in the middle school hallway by myself. I was trying to get out of gym class and going to get a nurse pass. And I was walking past the faculty parking lot, and in walked Mr. Minor. And I couldn't, I was so happy to see him, but I also was taken aback by his appearance. He, his skin appeared gray. He looked starved. And I still said, hello, we miss you so much. How are you doing? And he looked me straight in the face and he said, I'm dying. And I'm having a surgery tomorrow, and I don't know if I'm gonna survive it.

• 22:40Speaker 01

  I was 14.

• 22:43Speaker 01

  And we continued to walk down the hallway together. And when he peeled off to the main office, we bid each other farewell. He was a little teary, and he said, I'll do what I can to get back to the classroom. And I went on to the nurse's office. And at this point, I was actually undone. The nurse called my mom. She picked me up. And I, in my emotional, you know, I was just a mess. My mom had a suggestion for me, and that was to write him a letter. And so I took her advice. And I did. I sat down and I wrote a letter expressing

• 23:23Speaker 01

  to him his value in my life. How he was a teacher in math, of course, but also I felt like he was, he was a guide and how I wanted to live my life as a person with humor and intelligence. And we ended up driving the letter to his mailbox. He lived in our town. We knew where he lived. I don't know why, but we did. And we put it in his mailbox. And the next morning before school, at the crack of dawn, Mr. Minor called my home. And he thanked me for the letter. And he said he would do everything he could to get back to the classroom. Now, that very night, coincidentally, I had a plan to go on this

• 24:08Speaker 01

  middle school pilgrimage with my youth group. And we went into New York City to St. John the Divine Cathedral for this overnight experience called Night Watch. And part of that experience is that there is a midnight candlelit service. And they really help you embrace prayer. And so obviously, Mr. Minor was so on my mind that day, and I prayed for him. I lit candles. And a week later, we got the news that he survived his surgery. And he was, went back to the classroom eventually. And he was healthy and well for another nine years. So now flash

• 24:52Speaker 01

  forward, 23 years old, I'm living and working in New York City. And I get a phone call from my dad, and he has gotten wind that Mr. Minor is again gravely ill. And so I did what I did the time before. Now, I only needed to take a subway. I went back to St. John the Divine. I lit the candles where I seem to remember that they were. I prayed. And I wrote him another letter. And in that letter, I told him that all those years ago, I had gone to the cathedral, I'd lit the candles, I had prayed, and it had worked. So my hope

• 25:31Speaker 01

  is that that would happen again. And I also told him that at this point, as a college graduate, I calculated that it had maybe been 90 teachers later, that I still held him up there as one of the top three teachers who really saw me and made me feel valued and helped me discover my purpose and how I wanted to pursue my education in my early part of my life. Mr. Minor died five days later. He, my candles and my prayer didn't

• 26:11Speaker 01

  save him. I never heard from him. I went to his funeral. I didn't get a chance to talk to his wife and his daughters in the vast sea of former students of his. It was packed. But now, five years later, I'm in the hallway of the high school where I'm now a teacher myself. And barreling down the hallway is Mr. Minor's daughter, Regina. And she comes up to me, and she grabs my shoulders, she shakes me, and she said, you didn't tell me you were that, Lindsay. Now, this is out of context. I mean, I have no idea what she's talking about. What do you mean? And she says, you didn't tell me you were the Lindsay

• 26:56Speaker 01

  who wrote the letters and lit the candles. My dad got your letter before he died. It meant so much to him. And it means so much to us in his legacy. Thank you. And right there, in that hallway, something just clicked into place that I understood that, yeah, he was my math teacher, but he was teaching me something way bigger than that this whole time. And that was that there is tremendous value in writing down your emotions, expressing them, and giving them to somebody. And in this case, yes, it mattered for Mr. Minor

• 27:36Speaker 01

  before he died. But it also really mattered for his family, for his daughters, his now grandchildren, his wife, because they didn't get to spend time with him in the classroom. They heard legends about him. But that wasn't the dad they knew. And so now they had this little piece of his legacy that was very real that they get to keep. And so for me, that really, and I, and to be completely honest, I didn't realize that that's what that was teaching me, like, in helping people write letters, until a few years ago, when a friend of mine, who is a listener and subscriber to my Substack, actually asked

• 28:16Speaker 01

  me if I'd ever considered helping people like her, she has adult children, write a personal statement to live alongside her will. And I just hadn't ever really thought about putting the whole thing together as letter writing in this way. But that's when I recognized, oh, my gosh, absolutely, letter writing, there's so much value to it.

• 28:41Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah. I mean, I love so many parts of that story. So when then, three years ago or so, so you're in a very different stage of your life. You're, you have a love of writing, clearly, that has followed you. And that manifests, one way it shows up is you saying, hey, I'm gonna write more regularly and publicly. I'll start a Substack. And you're writing your Substack, and this one reader, turned friend eventually, asks you, hey, can you help me write this one very particular type of letter, which is a really interesting letter. It's sometimes, I've heard, sometimes heard that kind of letter referred to as an ethical will. You know, a lot of us are familiar with the concept of a will, like, I bequeathed X, Y, and Z to whatever my quote state is, here's who gets pieces

• 29:25Jonathan Fields?

  of it. This, this concept of ethical will is kind of like a letter or another document that says, here's who I am, here's what I believe, here are the stories that matter, and here's like what I, and oftentimes, like, here's what I want you to know about you, and you, and you, and us. Is, is that sort of like the gist of what she was asking for?

• 29:42Speaker 01

  It's similar. I, when she, she was, she had known what an ethical will was. I hadn't at that point. I now do. But she had the unique and brutal experience, I guess it's actually unfortunately not too unique, but her mom had just passed from Alzheimer's. And so she had gone through the experience of caretaking for the last few years of her mom's life. And then when her mom did pass, you know, after death is a largely administrative experience for those who are left behind. And she just felt this absence of her mom's

• 30:23Speaker 01

  voice. She hadn't had contact with it for so many years, really, because her mom just wasn't who she knew her mom to be. And it made her so sad in the aftermath of her mom's death. When she was caretaking, she was so in the caretaking. But afterwards, and she was really reflecting on her mom's life, it was, she felt something was missing. And so she was thinking ahead that while she is healthy and vibrant and not at all thinking about dying, her young adult children, she wanted them to have her now, her voice now, when they experience her death. And I thought, first of all, that's incredibly wise. This particular woman happens to be a life coach, so I can tell why she's so smart about just

• 31:06Speaker 01

  living. So I see why she had the idea. But when she really wanted it to be a love letter, something that the lawyers might call a side letter, if you're doing a typical will. But if you, yes, an ethical will is something where you do all those things you just described. And from what I understand, it's, it's mostly about capturing who you are, how you live, like you said, the stories that matter to you, so that two generations out, instead of just hearing the name, oh, you know, great grandma Anna, you can actually read in her words who she was, what she stood for. And she's not just a name in the family history, right? She's, you can really learn about her a little bit more. So it's a beautiful

• 31:50Speaker 01

  practice for those who do it. But the, the actual letter to someone, yes, I suppose it could be considered part of an ethical will. But it's also, when I think about end of life, so much focus is on net worth, our belongings, our money, our property. And that matters, for sure. And our attorneys are very equipped at helping usher that process and help that process. But when I think about the worth of a life, I think about love. I think about relationships. I think about the invisible substance that matters. And

• 32:32Speaker 01

  I just don't know if we're accounting for that through our written words. It's not normalized in the, at the end of life preparation process.

• 32:42Jonathan Fields?

  And it kind of brings you back into a path of like, okay, so.

• 32:49Jonathan Fields?

  I want to actually create an opportunity for other people to be able to write letters, and not just end of life letters.

• 32:58Speaker 01

  Right.

• 32:59Jonathan Fields?

  But letters for all different, that mark moments in time. I remember you talking about launch letters.

• 33:05Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 33:05Jonathan Fields?

  Which I guess is sort of like apparent to a kid after maybe a high school graduation, or college grad, or just some moment where they're transitioning into something bigger and different.

• 33:14Speaker 01

  Some very clear moment. It could be a retirement, it could be a big move, it could be someone becoming a parent, you know, a graduation, a marriage, those are very sort of more common ones, but, or typical ones, but when there's a clear before and after on a date, and although the next phase might be welcomed and joyous, it will never be the same from what it was before. So I call those launch letters, where we're marking time of this before and encapsulating it before we get swept up in the after. And then the life letter is another one, because, well, to take a step back, yes, when I started

• 33:57Speaker 01

  working with people on what I call legacy letters, these end of life love letters to accompany a will, I realized that a lot of people wanted to share their letters now.

• 34:12Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah.

• 34:13Speaker 01

  And they weren't dying. They said, there, I'm so happy, I've put words to what I'm feeling, I want to share this. And so I thought, well, how beautiful, I love that. I came up with five different types of letters that are all love letters, they're all infused with gratitude, but they're, they're, they're big letters that you would write and give to somebody. And so the first is this legacy letter that we've been talking about. The second is this launch letter. Next is something I call a life letter, which is a bit of a softer moment in time. I think of it as a time capsule. Something now is so meaningful to you, and you want to capture what this is, but it's not necessarily changing tomorrow, you just know that at some point in the future, this

• 34:58Speaker 01

  won't be normal. Like, this isn't life anymore. So I actually just wrote one to my 12-year-old son, because he had a really, pretty magical summer in his baseball life, his young Little League baseball life. He, my son and his Little League team became state champs and got to represent Connecticut and play on ESPN, and they almost made it to the Little League's World Series, they were one game away. And yes, he has his memories, there are newspaper articles, there's a ton that will hold this summer in memory. And I got to be right there with him for the whole thing.

• 35:38Speaker 01

  And it was incredible and magical and hard, and a lot of growth happened, a lot of self-awareness came about, and I suspect that for my child, this is a, this is a pivotal moment in his becoming, that we will look back at when he's, say, 18, and point to this. And so I wanted to capture it, of what this has been, and what I'm seeing in him, and things he's said throughout this process, that I just wanted it, so I did not give him the letter yet, I'm holding it, I'm gonna tuck it away in the album of the whole thing, and maybe he'll find it years later.

• 36:21Jonathan Fields?

  Right moment.

• 36:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:22Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah.

• 36:23Speaker 01

  And he'll find it at some point. But that's what a life letter is. It's like a little time capsule that you, that you want.

• 36:29Jonathan Fields?

  So we got three letters, so?

• 36:31Speaker 01

  Yes, and then I also have a listen letter.

• 36:34Jonathan Fields?

  Okay.

• 36:35Speaker 01

  Which to me, this is like a personal reveal, where you have something of great importance that's personal, that you just need to tell somebody.

• 36:46Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah.

• 36:46Speaker 01

  And, and then I have a leader letter, and this is one, it's personal in nature, but it's a professional audience. So, you know, let's say you have a company that you lead, and something's happened in your own life that they do need to know about, to better understand what's going on with you, and it's not necessarily gonna affect the business, but you want them to know what's happening with you. So I call that a leader letter, so that just has a little bit of a different audience.

• 37:11Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah. It's interesting, so the five different types you just described, four of those resonate with me for a very specific reason. When our daughter graduated college, so when people ask me, like, like, oh, you're a writer, like, how many books have you written? Which is always a weird question.

• 37:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 37:29Jonathan Fields?

  And I'll, my tongue-in-cheek answer is, these days, is six, four that you can read. And the one is because the first is really unreadable.

• 37:40Jonathan Fields?

  But the other is because the last, I spent four years writing to a single person, and there's one copy in print. And that was a book that I wrote to my daughter when she graduated college, and it took me four years to get it out.

• 37:50Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 37:50Jonathan Fields?

  And the book is a series of letters to her. And, and it includes all four of those first categories, like, you know, like, end of life, legacy, launch letters, life letters, listen letters. They're just, there's just a whole mixture of all of those across, you know, like, enough to form a book. And it was things that I wanted to share about me, things I wanted to share about her, and what I noticed in her, and that. And it was, in my mind, in part also conversations that I really want to have, that I think really matter, that I don't think we'll ever just sit down and have.

• 38:25Speaker 01

  Hmm.

• 38:25Jonathan Fields?

  So I wanted to write, write it out in letter form, and I gave it to her when she graduated. And to me, that may be the, the most meaningful thing I'll ever write, if I wrote a hundred more books, you know? And it was the thing that took me the longest to write, because I was, and I'm still curious, like, what your take is on this, because as I was writing this, and again, fitfully starting and stopping, and I generally don't do, when I write, I generally, I flow pretty rapidly, it just comes out of me. This was so hard to do. And the reason was, I kept finding myself dropping into teacher mode, teacher and preacher mode.

• 39:04Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 39:05Jonathan Fields?

  And I was like, let me tell you about the world on high, let me tell you about this, can we talk about perfectionism for a moment? And it's just like, and I'm like, you're being an idiot, like, this is not what your kid needs from you. Your kid needs you to just show up as a human being, like flaws and dorkiness, and just kindness, you know? And, and owning the fact that you really don't know anything, and that that's okay. And really just sharing, like, on a deeper level. And it literally took me four years to keep stripping that away, keep stripping it away, and keep stripping it away, until I finally got to a place where I'm like, yeah, this feels true to me, and it doesn't feel like I'm being arrogant, or, you know, like, teaching

• 39:49Jonathan Fields?

  from on a high, it just, it felt like it was what it needed to be. This can be a challenging process.

• 39:56Speaker 01

  Yeah. Can I ask you a question?

• 39:57Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah.

• 39:58Speaker 01

  So it took four years, was that, were you continuing to add new letters to it over the four years? Or was that revision?

• 40:06Jonathan Fields?

  No, it was mostly just new stuff. And also, I would just step away for long periods of time, because I would write, and I would realize, it's just not working, and I would kind of set it aside. And the thing that actually made me finish it, was that I started writing it when she graduated high school, with my intention to give it to her before she started college.

• 40:25Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 40:25Jonathan Fields?

  And I wrote one letter, and in what was then an old, like, black and white composition notebook, you know, that we all used when we were kids. And I shared it to her, and then she wrote back to me. And then I went to write more, and that's when the switch flipped, and I just, I couldn't get back into the place that I needed to get to. And I literally was carrying this very, very low-grade, probably shame, that I told her I was, I was doing this thing for her. And for years, I just couldn't make it happen, until finally I said, okay, there's another, there's another opportunity here, she's about to have another big moment, and I want to

• 41:09Jonathan Fields?

  do what I said I was gonna do. And the October before she graduated college, I took a one-nun sabbatical, and that's all I did for a month, and I just wrote, and wrote, and wrote, and then revised, and revised, and in that month, that's when, you know, it came close enough so that I could say, okay, I'll be able to revise it and edit and make it what it needs to be, and then design it, and then literally have one single copy, like, book-bound and printed for her, like, when she graduates. I mean, there were times where I was writing in tears, you know, the times where I was writing, and I was laughing out loud, largely at just like, how insane I was, or silly I was, or like, some of the kooky memories that I had.

• 41:53Jonathan Fields?

  So it was really deeply meaningful to me, and what I was hoping was that I could, I could somehow bestow to her, like, the feeling that I had while, while I was reliving those things that I wanted to share, and, and the feelings that I had in seeing her in so many different ways in her own life, I want to know, I want her to know that I saw her in those ways.

• 42:16Speaker 01

  Really beautiful. I wanted to ask you a question about your letter. Was there ever a point when you thought, is my audience my professional audience? Were you ever thinking about publishing this for a wider audience?

• 42:30Jonathan Fields?

  For a hot second.

• 42:31Speaker 01

  Right, early on, I bet?

• 42:32Jonathan Fields?

  No.

• 42:33Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 42:33Jonathan Fields?

  Later.

• 42:33Speaker 01

  When? Much later?

• 42:34Jonathan Fields?

  I need to completely push that out of my mind while I was writing, but I did keep finding myself writing to an audience when I was trying to write to her, because that is my training.

• 42:43Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 42:43Jonathan Fields?

  I spent 20 years writing to an audience.

• 42:45Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 42:46Jonathan Fields?

  So that's one of the other challenges for me, I had to keep pulling myself back from that, saying, this is not what this is about.

• 42:51Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 42:51Jonathan Fields?

  You're writing to one person, your kid, the thing, like, the person who, like, breathes you in this world.

• 42:57Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 42:58Jonathan Fields?

  To let all the other stuff go. There was a hot second after I finished, where I thought, I was like, I think there's probably actually some really poignant things in here, that would maybe matter to people beyond my kid. And I considered it, and what I realized pretty quickly is, A, I don't own this anymore, it's actually not mine.

• 43:20Jonathan Fields?

  And B, I would never even ask her for permission to do that, because to me, even asking would cross the line.

• 43:29Speaker 01

  Takes away the, the gift of it, what you did for her. But who knows? Who knows? The ripple effect that could come from this.

• 43:38Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah.

• 43:39Speaker 01

  She may share it with a future partner, future kids, maybe she'll publish it.

• 43:45Jonathan Fields?

  Maybe. I get viscerally how powerful this experience can be, you know, for a giver and receiver.

• 43:52Jonathan Fields?

  And we'll be right back after a word from our sponsors. Good Life Project is sponsored by Wild Alaskan Company. So I have learned that eating well isn't really about willpower. It's about friction. When good ingredients are just right there, easy and genuinely enjoyable, staying consistent stops feeling like work. And that is where Wild Alaskan Company comes in. So they deliver wild-caught, high-quality seafood to your door on your schedule. Every filet is individually portioned and vacuum sealed, so it works for a quick weeknight meal or something more elevated. It's quick-frozen, straight-from-Alaskan waters, locking in texture and flavor and key nutrients like omega-3s, no GMOs, no antibiotics, no additives, and every order supports sustainable harvesting

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• 45:20Jonathan Fields?

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• 46:01Jonathan Fields?

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• 46:20Jonathan Fields?

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• 46:48Jonathan Fields?

  There are going to be a lot of people joining us who are saying to themselves, "Well, this sounds lovely for you. You're writers."

• 46:53Speaker 01

  Yes, and honestly, most people feel that they're terrible writers. That is a narrative that I think a lot of people hold from high school. Somebody, somewhere, and I just want to, I want to apologize to all of you on behalf of whatever teacher was having a bad day or a bad moment.

• 47:13Jonathan Fields?

  The former English teacher is essentially apologizing.

• 47:15Speaker 01

  I am telling you that you are a good writer. We all have it in us. We do. And I also want to tell you that your personal letters are not being graded. They, no one is taking a red pen to them. No one is going to read your letter and think it could have been better, because that's not what they're looking for. When someone is reading your letter, it is all about what they are feeling. And back to this idea of, for the people who are out there saying, "Yeah, good for you guys. You write. You're comfortable with a pen in hand." It's the voice in the, in the letter and that connection of who, you being you in

• 47:58Speaker 01

  your most natural way, is what you feel in a letter that is different than if you plugged in to ChatGPT. Send a loving letter to my child about how proud I am of them at their college graduation. And so, when you, if you sit down to write it, you know, of course, I've, I love to support people who feel a little helpless with the writing, because it is a real thing. But I try to encourage people to channel just who I am and what you would say to someone, your loved one, if you saw them right here, you know, if you just walked up to them. How would you greet them? What would you say? What are

• 48:38Speaker 01

  the words? What's the nickname? You know, is it dear? Would you, is, does it even start with, "Dear, you know, Molly"? Or is it, is it something different? Is it her nickname shouting out with an exclamation point? Is it something else? How, what is an authentic greeting for you? And leading into an opening that very much sets that familiar tone, so that you're not thinking so much about crafting words and language as much as you are about establishing this familiar tone with this person who you know and they know you. And then, sort of, breaking it down. I have a whole scaffolding that I'm happy to share with your audience.

• 49:23Jonathan Fields?

  And I think actually it would be helpful. I mean, I know every letter is going to be different, and the focus and everything is going to be different, but you do have this very simple, sort of like, five-part structure, basically. That's sort of a general overview of like, how you would think about, like, these are the, like, these are like the major blocks that you, could you walk through that?

• 49:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, sure. So it starts with, like I said, the opening, and that is to set the tone, create your attitude around what it is you're, what you're saying, establish context. So, one little trick of that, that I, especially around a life letter or a launch letter, a little tool is to just think of when it is that that, this person pops into your mind in your day-to-day life. What's the kind of thing that you're doing? So let's say you wanted to write a life letter to a former college roommate, let's say. And

• 50:24Speaker 01

  let's say you, you're in your home right now, it's 30 years later, you, there's a fly buzzing around. You pick up a fly swatter, and you, and you have this memory of being in your college dorm when there was that night when that fly wouldn't leave you guys alone, and you woke up in the night. To start a letter with something like that, you know, tell the story of, "I'm, I'm in my kitchen, you know, there's a fly. I grabbed the fly swatter, and I'm dropped right into that memory of that night in college. And boom, here we are, you know, in the relationship that only you and I have." You've, you've used a little anecdote. And so, that, and then that one image could then seep into

• 51:10Speaker 01

  the next part of the letter is what I call the landscape of us. And this is just establishing our relationship and who we are. You know, gosh, all these years later, being, you know, spending that time together in college as roommates has been one of the most meaningful pockets of time in my life. I adored that time with you. You know, so the landscape that, this is who we are. Then the next part of the letter is the heart of the letter. And this is where you really open up with vulnerability about the, the thing you wanted to set out to say. And in some letters, this can be a little bit harder thing to admit.

• 51:50Speaker 01

  In some, it might feel awkward because it's so obvious and maybe cheesy, but this is where you open your heart with an "I" statement and say the thing. Like, "I just miss you. I miss being around you. I miss your energy," if that's the thing to a college roommate, let's say. And then, the next part of the letter is what I call the nurture of the letter. And this is where you then give them something of you. This is like where you, I, I think of it as giving them a hug with your words. You express your gratitude, your love, how much you value the memories you have, and hopes for more shared memories

• 52:31Speaker 01

  in the future. And, you know, then you, then the last is the closing, and I actually suggest kind of making the closing really swift and neat and tidy. And if you find yourself in the closing having a lot more to say, it's probably because you didn't say everything you wanted to in the heart of it. But then, another little tactic I share with writers is whatever image you started with, so in this example, the silly example I'm giving about the fly swatter, is that you might then close the letter by saying, "It just amazes me that so much of your way of doing things has seeped into my way of doing things all these years later. Even in the way I swat a fly, I swatted a fly," or something

• 53:14Speaker 01

  like that. And then, you just close it out, I think, with a familiar sign-off and a, a nickname, or a, just your name.

• 53:23Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah, I love that. And by the way, for those joining us, Lindsay has been incredibly gracious, and we'll, in the show notes, we'll include a link to just a one-pager, where you don't have to memorize this or go back through it.

• 53:34Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 53:34Jonathan Fields?

  Where we kind of walk through a little bit more process for you, if you want to actually sit down and do this yourself. I love the, the, like, the invitationals. You don't have to be a writer to do that, or consider yourself having been a writer. We're all writers at the end of the day.

• 53:48Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 53:48Jonathan Fields?

  It's, it's not about the craft or the prose. It's just about, in whatever form it takes, just sharing what's in your heart, sharing what feels like needs to be shared and said in that moment. I'm curious whether you have a take about handwriting versus typing?

• 54:04Speaker 01

  I mean, I think handwriting is something of value, that especially if we feel connected to the handwriting of, say, a parent, it's nice to have that. I think, like you saw earlier, when I was reading my journal that I kept, my handwriting, even I have a little bit of a hard time reading it, so there's a part of me that wishes this whole thing were typed up. I think it's personal preference, but if it's a personal letter that is meant to be saved, I will then handwrite what I've, what I've typed.

• 54:37Jonathan Fields?

  Just like you work out what you say on the screen, and then once you feel like this is it, then you actually sit down and write it.

• 54:43Speaker 01

  That process works for me.

• 54:44Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah. At the end of the day, let's say somebody's joining us, and they're like, "This sounds really cool. I've always been scared of doing something like this. I feel like I don't have the ability to do it, but you've kind of convinced me. At least give it a shot." And they're going to go and, and do this. And, and I would encourage anyone to do this, right?

• 55:02Jonathan Fields?

  Do you feel like it would be helpful for that person who's just really like, this is strange for them. It's a little, it's an alien. They're concerned or they're going to be able to do it, to think about first just writing it and assume during the writing process that maybe the recipient is actually never going to see it?

• 55:20Speaker 01

  Yes, I very much recommend that. And I think I've written plenty of letters that will never be shared because it's a wonderful tool for figuring out what you really feel, a letter, writing a letter is very helpful in that way. But I think that's a very comfortable way to start, to write the letter and know that it's not going to be shared. You'll tuck it away, but to experience it and see what it feels like. I have an offering once a month. It's called the Year of Meaningful Connection Letter Writing Project, where you can join me and I send you in the, in email, you know, inspiration once a month to write a letter and we'll have a little bit of accountability.

• 56:04Speaker 01

  And a recent one was writing to a lead character in your life. And someone wrote a comment that said, I just feel so awkward writing that to my wife. I just think it would be so awkward. And I get that because if you, if you're not in the practice of pointing out to someone what they mean to you, it is hard to do. And often we let Hallmark take care of it, right? We just get the card that says the right thing and we just say from whoever. And that is a beginning. It shows that we feel something and we want to connect, but it's harder to do. But I wrote back to him, I gave him a little challenge

• 56:48Speaker 01

  and I said, well, I guess I'll ask you this, what feels more awkward? Never letting your wife know what she means to you? Or saying it in all your beautiful awkwardness and giving her the chance to feel seen and appreciated and that she can revisit that whenever she wants? He hasn't written back yet. But I think it's just, it's a little risk. Vulnerability is a risk. I would recommend getting really small note cards at first, you know, that you could write a little note on and, and just practice a sentence that

• 57:30Speaker 01

  you give to someone, maybe, maybe not a full letter, just sharing little bits of thoughts. I mean, I keep on my desk, I keep note cards of various sizes so that I can do that when I have just a, what would be a fleeting thought, but it's a beautiful thought about somebody that I could send in text and sometimes do, but I maybe want it to be saved. I will just write it on a little note card and drop it in the mail or drop it at their house because it doesn't need to be a whole long thing for me to express a moment of thinking of something that someone said and how beautiful I thought that was and that I haven't stopped thinking about that for a week now. I just want you to know that that mattered to me.

• 58:14Speaker 01

  Something like that. It's just starting a practice of saying the thing. I, I can honestly tell you, well, maybe there was one time, but for the most part, I'm pretty, I'm pretty unapologetically vulnerable. I'll put it out there. And I can't remember a time when somebody hasn't smiled, when I've, when I've said something positive about them or how they made me feel or made an observation of something about them that I think is special. People appreciate it. They, they feel good. It's not awkward to notice something about

• 58:58Speaker 01

  someone and name it. It's not awkward to have emotions. We all have them.

• 59:02Jonathan Fields?

  And I love the invitation that you just sort of, in a gentle, almost backhanded way, offered up and says, okay, if the long letter feels a little too much for you right now, it all, it counts to just do a quick little note card. Like it, like you don't have to actually sit down and write the big thing. Maybe eventually you do, but maybe also just work up to it and maybe just like a short little note, like a literally like a thinking of you type of thing with a few sentences. It's a great, maybe that's all it ever leads to, but over time, if it becomes a practice, it really makes a difference. Or maybe that becomes sort of like the gateway drug to a fuller expression.

• 59:43Speaker 01

  Yes. Imagine opening the mail and receiving a note from a friend that said, I can count on my five fingers, all the people who matter to me the most, and you're my pinky finger.

• 59:58Jonathan Fields?

  Hmm. I think I'd cry.

• 1:00:00Speaker 01

  That's all you need to say. Just, just one, that's it. It doesn't have to be long. It doesn't have to be the full letter. But when you, it's, it's such a perfect package, an emotional package, to put something into words, to write it onto paper and to gift it. And like you said earlier on, there's a ripple effect, even if it's just within that receiver, because you feel something when you get it. But I think of what you wrote for your daughter. And I think about how she received that at probably age 22,

• 1:00:37Speaker 01

  right? And to think of her reading that at 32, and 42, and 82. I mean, that's powerful connection that lasts, it, it just lives beyond our memories. Our brains can't hold on to the tangible emotions in the way that I think we'd all like them to, because our brains aren't designed like that. But to read something that your parent wrote you, you know, 60 years ago, is

• 1:01:14Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:17Speaker 01

  good stuff.

• 1:01:18Jonathan Fields?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:18Speaker 01

  Making for a good life there, I'd say.

• 1:01:20Jonathan Fields?

  I hope so. It's a good place for us to come full circle as well. So in this container of Good Life Project, if I offer the phrase to live a good life, what comes up?

• 1:01:30Speaker 01

  I've been thinking about this because I know that you asked this question. And I think it's really that to be open to collecting wisdom from people all around you, collecting that, putting that into your life, and being willing to be an ambassador of that wisdom in other ways. So in the way that someone might collect sea glass, you find this little thing and you, you don't necessarily know how it came to you, but you find it and it, and it's like treasure. I think wisdom's like that. And I think we all have that.

• 1:02:11Speaker 01

  I think everybody has something that they can teach us. I call them life teachers, people who are just out there and their human experience somehow positively impacts my own human experience or one's human experience. But to be open to it and let it seep in and, and just allow yourself to be a vessel where we share wisdom.

• 1:02:35Jonathan Fields?

  Thank you.

• 1:02:36Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 1:02:37Jonathan Fields?

  So let's talk about some of the big takeaways from this. One thing that I keep thinking about is Lindsay's line that your letters are not being graded. Nobody's taking a red pen to them. The person reading them is not evaluating your prose or your grammar. They're just feeling something. And most of us have let a high school English class talk us out of that for 40 years. Three other things maybe that we can hold on to here. First, her five letters. The legacy letter, the launch letter, the life letter, the listen letter, and the leader letter. Different moments, same job. Second thing is her structure, which starts with a, a small concrete anecdote and moves into what she calls the landscape

• 1:03:20Jonathan Fields?

  of us, and then the heart, then the nurture, then a short close. So straightforward, any of us can do it. And third is that, that ripple effect. Her letter reads a dying teacher and then his wife and his daughters and his grandchildren, and she only found out years later by accident in a hallway. Most of the time, you may never find out at all, but that doesn't mean it's not worth writing it. So maybe here's something to do this week. Get a small note card, not even a letter, a card. Write three simple sentences to one person about something specific that they did, you haven't maybe stopped thinking about, and then actually mail it or give it to them. And hey, before you go, do me a quick favor.

• 1:04:05Jonathan Fields?

  Think of one person in your life who would really benefit from this conversation and send it to them, forward it to them so they can watch or listen to. And if you feel like it, go ahead and leave us a review wherever you get your podcasts. Truly does help us get discovered and brings more people into these conversations. This episode of Good Life Project was produced by executive producers Lindsay Fox and me, Jonathan Fields. Editing help by Troy Young and Alejandro Ramirez. Chris Carter crafted our theme music. And of course, if you haven't already, go ahead and follow us wherever you get your podcasts so you never miss a conversation. Until next time, I'm Jonathan Fields signing off for Good Life Project.

• 1:04:48Jonathan Fields?

  Today's episode is sponsored by NerdWallet Wealth Partners. Making more money doesn't come with instructions. Nobody hands you a manual that says, congrats on the raise, here's what that does to your taxes. That's where NerdWallet Wealth Partners comes in. They're a financial advisory firm built for high earners in their 30s and 40s. The first thing they do with every client is create a financial plan. It's basically a roadmap from where you are today to where you want to be. When you decide you want to retire five years earlier or spring for the bigger house, they'll run all the numbers on what's possible. And they meet with their clients regularly because they know that at this phase of life, things change quickly. Think of NerdWallet Wealth Partners as the manual for high earners that you never got, plus someone who's actually read it. Find out

• 1:05:31Jonathan Fields?

  more at nerdwalletwealthpartners.com/good. NerdWallet Wealth Partners LLC is an SEC registered investment advisor. Registration as an investment advisor does not imply a certain level of skill or training, nor does it constitute an endorsement by any securities regulator. Please see nerdwalletwealthpartners.com for disclosures and important information.

• 1:05:49Speaker 02

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• 1:06:53Jonathan Fields?

  You ever wish you could just step out of the screen and into a room of warm and wise and amazingly kind human beings? We are bringing back the magic of our beloved camp with Good Life U pop-ups. One-day gatherings packed with deep insights and joy and real connection. We're launching in 2027. And we want to know, where should we visit first? Tap the link in the show notes to vote in our quick poll and tell us where to go. Can't wait to see you there.