Giggling about virginity, confessionals, and cheating

Paige found a new side of TikTok and Hannah's mom will always be her emergency contact. subscribe to our newsletter

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Hannah Berner?

  I was thinking about how women have so many little things we have to do when we're getting home that you have to be aware of.

• 0:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, so many people have my location.

• 0:08Hannah Berner?

  And you have to share your ETA, you have to check the route, you have to text everyone, "I'm home."

• 0:12Paige DeSorbo?

  And if your friend like doesn't text you, "Oh, you got home," you're calling the FBI.

• 0:17Hannah Berner?

  Yep, yep. And we joke about it because it's so normal to us, but you're constantly paying attention. And even when you're exhausted and just want to get home, your brain still has to be on. You're like, is this guy going the right route? Am I in the right place? Who's around me? What's happening?

• 0:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, there's truly no clocking out of your safety.

• 0:34Hannah Berner?

  And that's why riding in a Waymo feels different. It's an autonomous ride with an empty driver's seat. So, once you get in, you have this private space that's actually just yours.

• 0:42Paige DeSorbo?

  And you know, I love alone time, and I truly feel like it's such a luxury in a Waymo.

• 0:46Hannah Berner?

  Especially after being social. Like, I love everyone, but like...

• 0:49Paige DeSorbo?

  Please, nobody speak to me.

• 0:51Hannah Berner?

  Like, give me 20 minutes. I want music, the right temperature. There's no compromising. And you can customize the ride, put on your own music, answer texts you ignored all night, stare out the window. You actually have a minute where you're not thinking about everyone else.

• 1:04Paige DeSorbo?

  And that's the thing. It's not even necessarily about doing something. Sometimes it's just, you want to sit there and not speak.

• 1:11Hannah Berner?

  And put your guard down for a second and feel safe.

• 1:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Which truly, women deserve.

• 1:16Hannah Berner?

  We deserve to disassociate safely for 20 minutes.

• 1:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I mean, put that on a t-shirt, for real.

• 1:22Hannah Berner?

  And obviously, safety is a huge part of why that feeling matters. Knowing Waymo's safer, there's something refreshing in having that space where you can just be yourself and let Waymo handle the driving.

• 1:31Paige DeSorbo?

  And we spend enough of our lives being on.

• 1:34Hannah Berner?

  Exactly.

• 1:34Paige DeSorbo?

  We don't need to be on in the car.

• 1:37Hannah Berner?

  Getting around shouldn't require so much mental energy. And if this sounds like your ideal way to get around too, download the Waymo app and use code GIGLY to get 20% off your next two rides. You can check out the full terms in the app.

• 1:49Paige DeSorbo?

  We love a discount.

• 1:51Hannah Berner?

  And if Waymo isn't in your city yet, head to waymo.com/gigly to sign up and help bring Waymo to you.

• 1:56Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, remember when I told you how excited I was about Lululemon dropping their fall collection on September 8th? Well, the collection is finally here and I just got my hands on a few pieces and let's just say these will be in my rotation on repeat. I got the Groove Yoga Bra and the High Rise Matching Short. They're so buttery soft. They have laser cut pocket openings for optional and removable cups, which I love that because sometimes I don't want to have a bra insert when I'm working out, but sometimes I do. Performance never compromises style at Lululemon. I love their vintage-inspired styles and everything comes in such an assortment of colors. So if you don't want to stick to black, which is my traditional go-to, you can explore other colors. Like, I love a burgundy workout set. New styles from Lululemon's fall collection are here.

• 2:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Popular colors go fast, so be on the lookout for those drops. And if something doesn't work out for you, free returns always. That's lululemon.com, lululemon.com.

• 2:51Hannah Berner?

  This episode is sponsored by Cars.com. I feel like your car says a lot about you. It's transportation, storage, and honestly, kind of a personality test. Maybe you need something for weekend road trips, something you can actually parallel park in the city, or just enough trunk space for an emergency outfit and backup shoes. Personally, I like options and I'm very specific. So this is where Cars.com comes in. Cars.com has the tools that make your car shopping way less overwhelming. With more than 200 advanced search filters, you can narrow things down based on what actually matters to you. Deal badges help show how fairly a vehicle's priced, so you can browse with more confidence and fewer chaotic tabs open, which I think we can all appreciate. Start your search with Cars.com. Where to next?

• 3:37Speaker 02

  Sup, gigglers? Carrie, fix the wifi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed.

• 3:47Speaker 02

  I mean, the day just got away from me.

• 3:50Hannah Berner?

  What's up, my OG Antonobi gigglers? You know who OG is.

• 3:57Paige DeSorbo?

  The guy from The Next.

• 3:59Hannah Berner?

  Paige is in a really difficult spot right now because everyone in her life is really happy about The Next. And she was happy for like 3 seconds and then she's moved on.

• 4:07Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I've moved on.

• 4:09Hannah Berner?

  She's worried about her pedicure, she's worried about other things happening where I have... I am still shaking. Look at my hand. Look at my hand. You can't see it on audio? Look at my hand. It's shit. I can't... Everyone's going about their day, I'm like, how are people going about their day right now?

• 4:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Here's the thing about me and Hannah.

• 4:26Paige DeSorbo?

  We have a schedule. We're scheduled people. But sometimes our schedules will change a little and we'll text the other and say, hey, do you want to do this earlier because something changed in my schedule? And typically, and I love that, and I love that, that we can do that with each other. And typically it works. Our schedules work. But sometimes it's like someone has a work thing, someone has another call, can't do that. Oh, I have to go, I'm traveling, I'm on a flight, whatever. But today I said, no.

• 4:58Hannah Berner?

  Wait, so we're all texting in the morning and I realized I have like an hour before a call we both have to be on. So I was like, do we want to knock this out right now? Like I wrote the cutest, like, should we be crazy and just knock out Giggly Squad this morning? And Paige just writes, no. And no one says anything after. And then I go, tell me how you really feel. Jesus, sorry for trying to bring joy and laughter and lightness to the community.

• 5:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Because I feel like I'm always moving my schedule around. And this has nothing to do with you. I always feel like I'm moving my schedule around, accommodating people, like, whatever. And today I had to get a pedicure. And I said, you know what? No, I have scheduled.

• 5:36Hannah Berner?

  No.

• 5:36Paige DeSorbo?

  That I'm getting a pedicure and I have to, like, I can't.

• 5:40Hannah Berner?

  I'm getting better at saying no to people, but like, not really. I'm still getting myself in insane situations that people are like, all you had to do was say no.

• 5:48Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I know. Because you want to know what? I've been saying yes to a lot of things and then I've been going back and being like, actually? No, I'm not doing that.

• 5:57Hannah Berner?

  And you know what? You can change your mind and that's called freedom of speech. And actually, I've never not changed my mind in any situation. I've never made a mind and not changed it.

• 6:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, you're the queen of that. Sorry. Kitty is like rolling around on her back, like looking up at me upside down and it's...

• 6:15Hannah Berner?

  Well, you guys, I've been traveling. So you know, Butter decided she's following me all around. So she's literally sitting. Just listening in, like she's, she's like, we're podcasting now.

• 6:27Paige DeSorbo?

  I love, just like at any given point, there's a cat around me, like napping somewhere.

• 6:33Hannah Berner?

  They do protect us from, um, evil spirits.

• 6:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Um, I have to bring up something important from the last pod that this girl made a TikTok about and was laughing at us.

• 6:42Hannah Berner?

  Oh, is it about the World Cup? Okay, how were you supposed to know that?

• 6:46Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, wait, I did know that. Like, I knew, we knew that it was multiple games.

• 6:53Hannah Berner?

  What do we not know?

• 6:54Paige DeSorbo?

  I thought that the big game, like the most important one, is in New Jersey. Is that right?

• 7:02Hannah Berner?

  What'd she say?

• 7:03Paige DeSorbo?

  She said, she was like, they, girls thought that there, it was one game and we asked them to come to New Jersey. She was like, it's all over the country. I thought it was all over the world. I knew that they were like, all, games were all over the world. I just thought that the biggest one was gonna be in Jersey.

• 7:20Hannah Berner?

  See, I like that we're starting conversation about women in the arts. Like, that's all our job is. And I love that the women stood up and said, actually, let's live and let's, let's learn.

• 7:32Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 7:32Hannah Berner?

  And that's what she did, so thank you.

• 7:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Thank you.

• 7:35Hannah Berner?

  Whoever showed us what, I don't, I didn't hear it, but basically they're, they're all over America and New Jersey's one of them.

• 7:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, for example, today at 10:00 PM, South Korea is playing.

• 7:45Hannah Berner?

  It was happening right now?

• 7:46Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't know who this team is.

• 7:47Hannah Berner?

  It's happening right now? I can't keep up!

• 7:49Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, and like tomorrow, the USA is playing Paraguay.

• 7:52Hannah Berner?

  Where are you looking right now?

• 7:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Just looking at Google, www.google.com.

• 7:58Hannah Berner?

  Ask Jeeves. Um, can I please, let me start, just talk about the Knicks in the very beginning and then I'll move on, I promise.

• 8:04Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 8:05Hannah Berner?

  Okay, so I was alone last night and I'm so excited. Watched the Knicks, all comfortable, me and butter already. And let me just say, the thing with the Knicks is that like, the Knicks have been so bad for so long, like, it was like a joke in New York where they'd say like, when things would get awkward, you're supposed to be like, how about them, those Knicks? So you could bond over like complaining about how, are you yawning already?

• 8:28Paige DeSorbo?

  Sorry, I, I thought the phrase was, how about them Yankees?

• 8:32Hannah Berner?

  Actually, wait, I think it's both. Actually, I was kind of making up a story about the Knicks.

• 8:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I think it could be any team, any.

• 8:40Hannah Berner?

  But I, I, anyway, the Knicks suck and New York City.

• 8:44Paige DeSorbo?

  This is what I, this is exactly what's wrong with sports fans. You guys are so dramatic about every little thing, like.

• 8:54Hannah Berner?

  Truly. Like my adrenaline is through the roof. I'm like, I haven't been able to focus on anything. I feel like Regina George. No, Lindsay Lohan in Mean Girls, when I'm like, I can't stop talking about it and I can tell everyone around me is annoyed with me, but I guess I got it. But it's also sad though, because everyone's so happy, like the miracle win, but then deep down, I'm like, if we lost, like, that would have been so fucking sad.

• 9:15Paige DeSorbo?

  You know, all I kept thinking about during it was.

• 9:19Hannah Berner?

  Your pedicure.

• 9:20Paige DeSorbo?

  Is Taylor Swift really gonna get married here? Like every time this screen would show her. And then I saw on TikTok, this girl was like, I think people are picturing like MSG, like her getting married on the stage. Like, I don't think people can picture that she would decorate MSG, that it would be like unrecognizable.

• 9:40Hannah Berner?

  She literally was wedding planning. She was like, why are all these men at my wedding venue?

• 9:44Paige DeSorbo?

  I think that they already got married in like a secret ceremony and they're just throwing a party this summer.

• 9:52Hannah Berner?

  I do have to say, her showing up with the Heim sisters with matching shirts that they made is so fucking cute.

• 9:58Paige DeSorbo?

  And saying next to Mariska Hargitay, like.

• 10:01Hannah Berner?

  I like people who have fun. Like I, I have trouble with it, but when I see other people like get, like imagine if me and you like pre-planned a like matching, like we, we don't have that.

• 10:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Never happen.

• 10:13Hannah Berner?

  That would never happen, but it's so cute that they were able to do that.

• 10:17Paige DeSorbo?

  That's not who we are as people, though.

• 10:19Hannah Berner?

  No, but if I had a friend who was like ahead of the game, I could possibly, like one of them.

• 10:25Paige DeSorbo?

  Just give me, yeah, just give me more tasks.

• 10:29Hannah Berner?

  It's friend homework. I watched into the third quarter and I'm human. I can only handle so much. And I was like a lot of pain and I was like, I had a day already. I don't need this. So after Kat got elbowed in the face and they were down by 29 points, I said, I need boundaries. I'm turning this off. Like out of respect for my Knicks, I need to.

• 10:52Paige DeSorbo?

  You didn't want to watch them lose.

• 10:55Hannah Berner?

  No, I couldn't. No, I turned it off. I couldn't. And the Madison Square Garden was silent. Also, I didn't pay 40 grand for tickets. I don't have to watch it.

• 11:05Hannah Berner?

  So Paige just did like a cartoon yawn. She was like

• 11:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Do you know, once I met a boyfriend that would be like, you're so ugly when you yawn like

• 11:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, cover your mouth.

• 11:19Hannah Berner?

  Wait, I wanna, I will literally beat his ass.

• 11:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Whatever. It doesn't even matter, but

• 11:25Hannah Berner?

  New York City is the hub of basketball, of hip hop, of culture. And it's like crazy that we've been so bad for so long. So anyway, I turned it off and I think I was actually watching Mormon Housewives. And I'm scrolling my phone and like 30 minutes later, I see someone just write OMG Knicks. So I'm like, that's funny. Like, let me just check what the score is. And it was 100 to 104. We were still losing, but I was like, that must be the wrong game. We're down by 30. I'm, it's like 11pm at this point. I put it back to the Knicks. I'm freaking the fuck out, all alone. Everyone's asleep. My dad, you, everyone's gone. So I'm just alone.

• 12:03Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I was awake. I was awake.

• 12:05Hannah Berner?

  Oh, I just assumed you didn't care.

• 12:07Paige DeSorbo?

  No, of course I care. It's a cultural moment that I want to be involved in. I don't want to like, but I had such anxiety watching it. Like I couldn't, I was like, okay, I have to look away. I did get interrupted because I personally was watching a Netflix show while I was, and then I had to turn, turn the channel because I didn't want to be out of the loop. But I started watching, it's called Shrill.

• 12:30Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, that was on Hulu before.

• 12:32Paige DeSorbo?

  I love that.

• 12:32Hannah Berner?

  Is it good?

• 12:33Paige DeSorbo?

  It's so good.

• 12:35Hannah Berner?

  Well, we love her.

• 12:36Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm obsessed with her.

• 12:37Hannah Berner?

  Aidy Bryant.

• 12:38Paige DeSorbo?

  I thought it was gonna be like, it's definitely a comedy, but it's like a little bit more serious than I thought. And I love it.

• 12:45Hannah Berner?

  I love it.

• 12:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, this is the last thing about the Knicks?

• 12:47Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 12:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Over, under, how many times did you think about your grandpa during the game?

• 12:52Hannah Berner?

  Why would you say that? I was like, that was my grandpa's score. That was my grandpa came in like a little angel and put the ball in.

• 13:02Hannah Berner?

  Defense wins championship.

• 13:04Paige DeSorbo?

  No, because why? Right when the buzzer, like they win, I thought Hannah's grandpa loved this.

• 13:13Hannah Berner?

  Paige, stop. I literally have to stop the pod right now. I literally have to stop the pod right now. No, Jerry, Jerry, all he did was watch the Knicks. All he did.

• 13:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Jerry Seinfeld? More like Jerry Berner should have been there.

• 13:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, I didn't tell, I just

• 13:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Obviously like me and Josephine are obsessed with Kitty and Taylor came up with this like alter ego for Kitty when we are in glam because Kitty loves glam and so we call her Mimi LaRue. And so one day Josephine was like, wouldn't it be so funny if I like booked you at a hotel under Mimi LaRue?

• 13:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Totally.

• 13:55Hannah Berner?

  Is it R E A U X?

• 13:58Paige DeSorbo?

  Um, no, it's Mimi, M I M I L A capital R U E, Mimi LaRue.

• 14:06Hannah Berner?

  Oh, got it.

• 14:08Paige DeSorbo?

  So I get to the Four Seasons in California and I was like, hey, um, I'm checking in. I like gave my name. I was like, I don't, it could, this is the name of the girl that could have made it. And she was like, okay, I'm not seeing that, but I am seeing a Mimi LaRue.

• 14:25Hannah Berner?

  Did she just do that to mess with you?

• 14:27Paige DeSorbo?

  She just did it because she thought it was like gonna be funny or like.

• 14:30Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, but if you didn't know, you could have like not gotten.

• 14:33Paige DeSorbo?

  And I was like, yes, okay. So that is actually me, but my name is Paige DeSorbo and she booked it under Josephine like and gave her an email and she was like, okay, I have to call my boss because I like can't have you check in under like three different.

• 14:47Hannah Berner?

  I knew this would cause drama and Josephine just wanted to have a little fun.

• 14:51Paige DeSorbo?

  Josephine's just trying to have a little like kiki, like funny ha ha moment.

• 14:54Hannah Berner?

  God forbid you have a little whimsy, but look, Josephine, when it comes to admin, you can't, you can't have whimsy.

• 15:00Paige DeSorbo?

  And the Four Seasons and honestly, the only thing that like saved me was she was like, I know you stay here all the time. So like, we know.

• 15:07Hannah Berner?

  You live here.

• 15:08Paige DeSorbo?

  But like in the future, and I was like, totally.

• 15:11Hannah Berner?

  Hollywood celebrities always use a different name. Like Lena Dunham said she had like a specific name she used.

• 15:17Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, like the manager came out and she was like, yeah, if you're gonna use an alias, you have to like tell us it's an alias. And I was like, totally got it. Like.

• 15:25Hannah Berner?

  I love how she's like, oh, are you a new one, a new alias girl? Okay, this is how you do it.

• 15:29Paige DeSorbo?

  My assistant just wanted to like be fun and like we weren't like actually using an alias.

• 15:34Hannah Berner?

  Bitch, this isn't Starbucks. This is the Four Seasons. Tell us your real fucking name, social security number. Oh, that reminds me of high school. My friend, she was like, I'm gonna say my name's vagina at Starbucks. And have them yell it. And we thought it was like the funniest thing that ever happened.

• 15:50Paige DeSorbo?

  That's like low key bullying.

• 15:53Hannah Berner?

  So what, you don't, is vagina a bad word?

• 15:56Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, let's not start there.

• 15:58Hannah Berner?

  Oh, also, I'm kind of obsessed with Kylie Jenner is dealing with, when you have a boyfriend, he has different sides to him, and we all have sides that we prefer. Now, Timothy Chevrolet, watching the Knicks try to win their first championship, is a monster that I don't think she mentally prepared for, where he's taking his shirt off and jumping into crowds, and he's going full like LaGuardia High School 2007, or whatever the fuck he was there. And um, he's, she's taking out her phone and filming him at this point.

• 16:39Paige DeSorbo?

  Some of the clips I see, it's like her taking her digital camera out and taking like pictures of him, just like enjoying the game, and I'm like, at the end of the day, everyone's just a girl. Like, she's literally just taking pictures, like putting her photo dump, like, and it's ju- and I, last night, they had like matching outfits on, and that's, she was probably just most excited for that.

• 17:04Hannah Berner?

  I do feel like they should leave a section for like, for free, to let like top Knicks fans go, because it does feel weird that like, the seats are so expensive for those games, but everyone who's been there all season long, even when they suck, like can't get in.

• 17:21Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, the mayor did like something for, he did, created like a lottery for World Cup tickets, so maybe he'll do it.

• 17:30Hannah Berner?

  Because no one wants to go to New Jersey?

• 17:32Paige DeSorbo?

  No, he, like, because so many New Yorkers wanted to go to the World, so, and he was like, yeah, we're right here, and so he made like a, I think it's like fifty dollars, you can enter.

• 17:42Hannah Berner?

  No one's talking about the Jordan-Kylie like lore.

• 17:46Paige DeSorbo?

  Why isn't it being brought up more?

• 17:48Hannah Berner?

  Why isn't it front page?

• 17:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, they're hugging, they're clearly like friends again, but they're not hanging out all the time.

• 17:56Hannah Berner?

  And they're not sitting next to each other, which they totally could be. Jordan likes to sit under the basket, Kylie sits on the side, and then afterwards, they like kiki a little bit, but they're not, I wonder how Chloe's feeling, what's the vibe?

• 18:08Paige DeSorbo?

  I wonder what their status is of their relationship. I mean, Taylor Swift hugged Kylie.

• 18:14Hannah Berner?

  Do you forgive a friend if they're now like engaged to someone else? Even though they fucked you over with something.

• 18:22Paige DeSorbo?

  What even happened?

• 18:23Hannah Berner?

  She was sitting on Tristan's lap and kissed him.

• 18:28Paige DeSorbo?

  Right, right, right, right, right.

• 18:30Hannah Berner?

  So Chloe was like, fuck her.

• 18:33Paige DeSorbo?

  I think they're over this. I think, I don't think Chloe gives a flying fuck.

• 18:39Hannah Berner?

  Yeah. I also like, think Jordan is the backbone of this household right now because she's been holding this bag.

• 18:47Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 18:48Hannah Berner?

  Have you heard about the lucky bag? Um, and Kat is amazing. Anyway, don't start like looking into the players and all their families and histories. It'll make you really emotional. I just can't. Honestly, sports is like too much for me to handle and that I'm so glad I'm retired. Go Knicks!

• 19:02Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, I will say, at the end of the game, when the guy that made like the winning tipped it in was like walking back to the tunnel, I did feel the sense of like, I so get how sports is like so emotional.

• 19:16Hannah Berner?

  You know, both his parents are dead. No, I'll.

• 19:23Hannah Berner?

  That's why he wasn't smiling.

• 19:24Paige DeSorbo?

  I didn't know both of his parents were dead. Okay, then scratch what I'm gonna say. Scratch what I'm gonna say. Actually, I can't say it anymore.

• 19:32Hannah Berner?

  Did I ruin your joke?

• 19:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I can't say it.

• 19:34Hannah Berner?

  Oh, I'm sorry.

• 19:35Paige DeSorbo?

  You're like, and yeah, his parents are dead, so do you want to keep being a bitch? Wait, that's so sad.

• 19:43Hannah Berner?

  My friend called me because he was out, like I was not on the streets and I was like, what's it like out there? And he's like, Hannah, I've never hugged so many random men in my life. Like, the men are just hugging.

• 19:54Paige DeSorbo?

  I felt like a loser, like not being out. I'm like, I should be with the people. And then I was like, what?

• 19:59Hannah Berner?

  No, no, no. It's more fun to wa- you can hear it. You could feel it.

• 20:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Most emotion we've seen from the men in a while. Most emotion we've seen in a couple of years from them.

• 20:10Hannah Berner?

  I think this is good.

• 20:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, it's nice to know that they're capable to get there and feel something. I think that's what we needed going into the summer with them. We needed them to feel like, oh yeah, I do have human emotion.

• 20:25Hannah Berner?

  Outlets.

• 20:25Paige DeSorbo?

  That could be expressed. That's not just anger and confusing, like confused, confusion.

• 20:32Hannah Berner?

  Wait, someone was joking that New York City's crime rate is at like zero right now. Because all the criminals are watching the Knicks.

• 20:39Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, that's one thing I will say. I will never understand when your city wins something, so you vandalize it.

• 20:48Hannah Berner?

  No, they're waiting, but right now, like, crime is at an all time low because all the men are not.

• 20:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, they're busy, they're watching TV. We literally, like, it's not a joke when we say, like, you have to occupy your boyfriend, like, it's a toddler, like, you put the game on, it's like, okay, you're gonna watch this, and then I'll be back. Like, they're really just children.

• 21:09Hannah Berner?

  They're all in, like, boy day camp right now and night camp.

• 21:13Paige DeSorbo?

  Imagine, like, every time the Victoria's Secret runway show was on TV, like, crime just, like, went down, because, like, all the girls were watching it.

• 21:20Hannah Berner?

  I also feel like even, like, our Eras Tour, we're not, like, hugging and kissing each other like they are.

• 21:26Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I feel like the Taylor Swift girls were. I'm trying to think, in what context do I have to be in to hug a bunch of people? I don't know.

• 21:33Hannah Berner?

  You've never hugged a bunch of people you don't know, unless it was, like...

• 21:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Giggly Squad meet and greet.

• 21:38Hannah Berner?

  Well, and you were blackout during it.

• 21:40Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, that's the only time I've hugged a bunch of people I know in a si- in a setting that, like...

• 21:46Hannah Berner?

  But hugging a giggler is completely different than a random person.

• 21:49Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, hugging a girl's different.

• 21:50Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, but also every giggler would hug me, then look at you and be like, I know you hate hugs, and you'd be like, good in here.

• 21:58Hannah Berner?

  I don't know if I like hugs, I just don't, I'm a people pleaser, so I'm like, let's, let's not do the whole shit we're here, should we not, just hug, let's get over with.

• 22:05Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 22:06Hannah Berner?

  It's like a blowjob, like, just fucking do it.

• 22:09Paige DeSorbo?

  I've stopped, like, honestly, I've actually probably gotten rude about it. Because, like, in certain situations where, like, you're behind a table or something, and people, and someone walks in, it's like, you're expected to, like, get up, and I've stopped doing that. I'm like, yeah, I'll get you when I get up, like...

• 22:24Hannah Berner?

  No, you've had a long day.

• 22:26Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I'm not like, I'm not like, possibly knocking over this table and all these, like, plates and glasses to hug you, like, no.

• 22:34Hannah Berner?

  No.

• 22:35Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm on Arts and Crafts TikTok right now, like...

• 22:37Hannah Berner?

  Oh, my god.

• 22:38Paige DeSorbo?

  Actually stumbled upon Angry Arts and Crafts.

• 22:42Hannah Berner?

  That's so you.

• 22:42Paige DeSorbo?

  It's so niche.

• 22:44Hannah Berner?

  It's literally water coloring for Scorpios.

• 22:46Paige DeSorbo?

  It's a girl that teaches you how to make, I don't know even what she was making, she was making, like, plant potters or something, but she yelled at you while she was doing it, and I was like...

• 22:57Paige DeSorbo?

  I was like, let me settle it. Yeah. Let me settle it.

• 23:02Hannah Berner?

  No, I thought you were gonna say you make like pottery and then you break it.

• 23:07Paige DeSorbo?

  Honestly, I wish, but she was like making, she was like, yeah, obviously, that's the next step. Like, I'm not stupid. And I'm like,

• 23:15Paige DeSorbo?

  yeah, I'm like, actually, follow. I'm on all your videos.

• 23:20Hannah Berner?

  I do love a no bullshit.

• 23:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I'm really.

• 23:23Hannah Berner?

  Even like a chef.

• 23:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 23:24Hannah Berner?

  That isn't nice about it. I like that.

• 23:26Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm really deep into like, home improvement TikTok. And some of the girls are so.

• 23:33Hannah Berner?

  I know.

• 23:34Paige DeSorbo?

  It's so.

• 23:40Hannah Berner?

  Are you actually trying any of this stuff in your own home?

• 23:42Paige DeSorbo?

  No, no, no. But I'm just saying, I'm just saying, like, the girls will get a hobby and then they'll just do it. Like, there's a girl that I follow and every month she redecorates her bathroom. She has a new theme and she just does it. And we mind our own business so much of the time. Who could have a problem with us?

• 24:02Hannah Berner?

  No.

• 24:03Paige DeSorbo?

  And so I'm really into, um, the girls just like being at home and having their own hobbies.

• 24:10Hannah Berner?

  I love that.

• 24:10Paige DeSorbo?

  It's really nice.

• 24:12Hannah Berner?

  Speaking of home, I found my wedding ring.

• 24:17Paige DeSorbo?

  I didn't know you lost it. I just wanted to say next summer, I do think I'm gonna, there's gonna be a situation where I want to have a garden. Or at least a plant that grows a tomato. But that's for next year. That's.

• 24:27Hannah Berner?

  You can talk to my mom. That's.

• 24:29Paige DeSorbo?

  That's where I feel like my life is headed.

• 24:30Hannah Berner?

  She has a garden. I bought my mom like a little garden toolkit that comes with a little seat that you put so while you're gardening, you have a little seat so you don't hurt your back. She's obsessed. It's like pattern and so, you know, it's a whole aesthetic, like.

• 24:43Paige DeSorbo?

  It's a whole world over there.

• 24:45Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 24:46Paige DeSorbo?

  I didn't know you lost your ring.

• 24:48Hannah Berner?

  Well, okay, I didn't lose, I took it off and then, you know.

• 24:53Paige DeSorbo?

  Life happens.

• 24:54Hannah Berner?

  I lose my phone every three seconds. Of course, if I take off my wedding ring, it's like that's up to God at this point.

• 24:59Paige DeSorbo?

  You have your, you just always wear your engagement ring. Oh, so you always just look engaged.

• 25:04Hannah Berner?

  I know. Everyone's like, are you engaged? I'm like, yeah.

• 25:06Paige DeSorbo?

  No one said that to you.

• 25:07Hannah Berner?

  No, everyone thinks I'm just engaged.

• 25:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Really?

• 25:09Hannah Berner?

  Who doesn't know me. Yeah. Like when I go somewhere, they're like, oh, did you just get engaged? But um, told my mom, I was like, fun fact, I actually don't know where it is. Like I was afraid to like admit it to myself, cause I, but I hadn't looked for it, cause I don't know where it is.

• 25:26Paige DeSorbo?

  How many months had passed?

• 25:28Hannah Berner?

  Over a year.

• 25:29Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh.

• 25:30Hannah Berner?

  And I'm like staying in a different apartment and you're like, things have shifted. Like I've lost less important things.

• 25:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 25:36Hannah Berner?

  You know? So my mom looks at me and she goes, I know where it is. I said, how do you know? And she goes, cause I put it somewhere, cause I knew you were gonna lose it. And I said, and that's why you're my emergency contact.

• 25:46Paige DeSorbo?

  Where was it? Where'd she put it?

• 25:48Hannah Berner?

  She, it's in like my jewelry.

• 25:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Box.

• 25:51Hannah Berner?

  Box that I like never open, cause like, God forbid, I pick it, I wear some jewelry. So I opened it, it was right there. I wore it for a day and then I was like, mm, uncomfy, put it back.

• 26:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Why are we both like that? It's actually kind of annoying because like I would love to like wear more jewelry, but I'm like, no, get it off me.

• 26:10Hannah Berner?

  I know. And then I do get itchy with it and also we talk with our hands so much, it becomes like, it's harder. It's like a swimmer with a hat on. Like I don't, I can't move the way I wanna move.

• 26:22Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't know if you guys remember me talking on the pod, but one of my friends had a baby and I wanted to send her a gift when she got home from the hospital. And I thought, should I get the baby something? No, I should get her something. That's why I got her a Lola blanket. Lola blankets are one of those products where the second someone touches it, they immediately understand the hype. She texted me, I'm not kidding, 10 minutes after walking in the door and was like, this Lola blanket is now my entire personality. I need to get another one because I can't keep carrying it from the couch to the bed. One Lola instantly makes your space feel. Cozier and more put together. And there's a reason Lola has over 20,000 five star reviews.

• 27:02Paige DeSorbo?

  I also recently just got Kitty one of the pet beds and let me tell you, she immediately jumped in it. She loves things that are a little bit elevated and the cushion in it is perfect for her. It's incredibly plush, holds its shape beautifully, and even helps regulate temperature. So your pet stays cozy year round. For a limited time, our listeners can get 40% off select Lola blanket products with code giggly at checkout. Just head to Lola blankets.com and use code giggly to get 40% off your order. After you purchase, they'll ask where you heard about them. Please support our show and let them know that Giggly Squad sent you. Wrap yourself in luxury with Lola blankets. This episode is sponsored by the new Hershey's Creme Bars in Salted Caramel and Affogato.

• 27:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Lately, I've been realizing that luxury doesn't have to mean some huge splurge. Sometimes it's just taking a few minutes to yourself during a busy day. I have one of these moments, oh, I don't know, every day around two o'clock. Whether that's making a pick me up coffee, or maybe I just need to scroll for a little bit on the couch. That's why I'm actually so excited about the new Hershey's Salted Caramel and Affogato Creme Bars available now. I absolutely love a treat yourself moment in the middle of the day. And this is a classic Hershey's Milk Chocolate layered with a Salted Caramel or Affogato Creme filling. So it feels a little elevated while still being your favorite Hershey's chocolate.

• 28:29Paige DeSorbo?

  Pick up the new Hershey's Creme Bars in Salted Caramel or Affogato wherever you shop for snacks and choose happiness with every bite. Okay, autumn in New York is the season where we can finally start dressing again. Every single thing is an excuse to put on a look. Going to work outfit, leading a meeting outfit, getting drinks with your friends, obviously outfit. And as we all know, every great outfit starts from the feet up. That is why I'm currently obsessed with Allies from Sam Edelman. They're a ballet flat, but a little something extra for fall. A contrasting velvet cap toe, I have them in this gorgeous azure blue, which is like a dusty muted blue. That somehow goes with everything, even Daphne's eyes. They're so cute and I'm already envisioning my next outfit.

• 29:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Straight leg jeans, an oversized blazer and a little shoulder bag. Very, I just threw this on when we all know I absolutely did not. And Hannah is loving hers too. She has the Michaela, which is the Sam Edelman's take on a Mary Jane. And this season it comes in the chicest leopard. So gorge, so easy and exactly the kind of shoe that makes an otherwise basic outfit look like you actually tried. And there's so much more coming from Sam Edelman this fall beyond these two. Like the new Teigan and Tallulah pumps, plus ready to wear handbags, fragrances and even a new men's collection. So basically you can make sure both you and your man are looking good for date night. Because we're not doing all that getting dressed just to let him show up in a t-shirt. Head to samedelman.com and get 15% off with code giggly15.

• 29:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Can we talk about the difference between a home that's furnished and a home that's intentional? Because if you're still living with a mattress on the floor at 25, that's crazy. And Cozy is here to help. Bed frames, sofas, rugs, shelves, tables. Cozy has everything and it all comes in boxes directly to your door. Cozy furniture is modular, so the piece you buy for your current place can reconfigure to fit your next one. And you can always add as your space and taste evolves. You can swap covers when you want to change and they go right in the wash whenever you spill something. If you have no clue where to start, they offer free one-on-one design consultations. So a real person can help you plan your space. No fees.

• 30:37Paige DeSorbo?

  So transform your living space today with Cozy. That's C-O-Z-E-Y.com. Make yourself at home. If your anxiety, depression or ADHD are more than just a rough patch, you might need more than just talk therapy or self-help tools. Talkiatri connects you with real psychiatric care. So you can actually understand what's going on and get a treatment plan that works. Talkiatri is 100% online psychiatric practice that provides comprehensive evaluations, diagnoses and ongoing medication management for conditions like ADHD, anxiety, depression and much more. Unlike therapy-only platforms, Talkiatri is psychiatry.

• 31:16Paige DeSorbo?

  You're seeing a medical provider who can diagnose mental health conditions and prescribe medication when it's appropriate. You can meet with a licensed psychiatrist who takes the time to understand what's going on, builds a personalized treatment plan and supports you over time with consistent, evidence-based care. And because you continue with the same provider, you're not starting over each time. Your treatment can evolve with you and you can actually make progress over time. Head to talkiatry.com/giggly to complete the short assessment and get matched with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes. That's T A L K I A T R Y dot com slash giggly to get matched in minutes. Talkiatry.com/giggly.

• 31:56Paige DeSorbo?

  I saw this thing on TikTok and it was like so opposite of what I'm gonna say. She looks gorgeous. But it was like, it was showing different housewives, not like the real housewives, like actual housewives of different like decades. No matter what age you are, in my head, if my friends are doing it, like I'll do it. So like if all of my friends collectively, right now, we all decided we were gonna stay home and be tradwives, I'd be like, okay, I'll do it if my friends do it.

• 32:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Then I got to thinking, what decade of housewives?

• 32:41Hannah Berner?

  Oh, you got dark. You got real dark.

• 32:43Paige DeSorbo?

  If you had to pick a decade of being a housewife, what decade are you picking? Are you picking like the early 70s or like the 70s when you're about to get your own credit card? Or are you picking like the 80s where they're really rebelling? Or are you picking like the 50s where they're like really diving into it?

• 33:02Hannah Berner?

  When were the men gone at war?

• 33:05Paige DeSorbo?

  They were gone a couple times.

• 33:10Hannah Berner?

  Because I know like when the men were gone, I feel like the girls were having so much fun. Also, we kept the economy going. Like, we were fully did every job.

• 33:18Paige DeSorbo?

  Like during World War II?

• 33:19Hannah Berner?

  I literally don't know wars. Like, I could, because I had no idea what wars, but I know the guys were gone. The girls were at home. It's when the guys came back and they were trying to like change everyone's lifestyle. And we were like, we were actually really good when you were gone.

• 33:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Like Rosie the Riveter, like post Rosie the Riveter. And we were like, we actually could figure it out. And they were like, yeah, but we don't want you to.

• 33:40Hannah Berner?

  And that's why then, it could have been a fun time too, though, because they discovered Xanax, I think. I could have made that up. But like, they were all high as a kite and like hammered and drunk, which like, sounds fun for like a couple of weeks.

• 33:52Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, so that's where I would go.

• 33:57Paige DeSorbo?

  I would have picked like late 60s, early 70s. Like, drugs are just coming out, but like, we don't really know what's going on. And doctors are still prescribing like crazy drugs, but it's from a doctor. So I'm going like, I'm going like early 70s, which now that I think about it, that would have been like our grandmas.

• 34:17Hannah Berner?

  So my nana's job, my nana never smoked weed or drank or did drugs because she was like a nice, a nice

• 34:25Paige DeSorbo?

  Your grandma never smoked cigarettes?

• 34:27Hannah Berner?

  No, that's why her skin looks so good. But you'd be, if, okay, this is what she would do, I told you. Her husband would leave to work and she would have all day to make sure she had dinner ready and the house cleaned.

• 34:40Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 34:40Hannah Berner?

  When she, he'd say, I'm an hour away, she would make sure it's all done and put her face on, make sure she looked really, really pretty, full makeup, full eyelash set. Sitting down with the food, all the laundry done, but she had all day to do it. And then, at some point, she got a job as a secretary and she would wear like Mugler sets. Like she was Mad Men.

• 35:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 35:06Hannah Berner?

  And like, I don't even know if she like, she could kinda type, but like that wasn't the point. They were just like, all the guys were looking at her, but she just wore iconic sets as a secretary. And that was like considered, you know, a woman in the arts, woman of STEM.

• 35:21Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I would have been high all day.

• 35:23Hannah Berner?

  Yep. You would have loved being a secretary for these men.

• 35:27Paige DeSorbo?

  I would have loved hosting like, oh, your boss has to come over for dinner on a Friday night? Hell yeah, I'll host. Like I will whip up the best presentation.

• 35:40Hannah Berner?

  See, I would have hated that.

• 35:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Trying to do all of that and you're like so high. Like there has to be such great stories of housewives that they could like never tell.

• 35:51Hannah Berner?

  Well, you know, I would have been lobotomied.

• 35:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 35:54Hannah Berner?

  Can you smoke weed on a lobotomy?

• 35:56Paige DeSorbo?

  No, they would have been like, she's hysterical is the word they would have used for you.

• 36:02Hannah Berner?

  Oh, God.

• 36:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Anyway, that was like my random thought.

• 36:05Hannah Berner?

  Also, no one was out back then. So like everyone was just gay married.

• 36:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, my whole thing was like, they had to be on the phone all goddamn day. Because there had to have been so much happening that was like secretive and like so gossipy. Because if they were all just home, the ti- I mean, they had to pass the time some way.

• 36:28Hannah Berner?

  Well, to this day, my nana, she wakes up, she has her phone call with Rosalie, her best friend from the twenties. Who knows? And like every Thursday, she has a phone call with someone else. Like she has all her phone calls set up. And that's, I think, how she always lived. She, this bitch, and you'd be on the phone just tripping your kids with the phone line.

• 36:51Paige DeSorbo?

  Bring back home phone landlines.

• 36:57Hannah Berner?

  I want a psychic to talk to you about why you're so obsessed with nostalgia.

• 37:01Paige DeSorbo?

  I think that's more of a question for a therapist.

• 37:04Hannah Berner?

  Oh.

• 37:10Paige DeSorbo?

  And I think it's because it's the last time I felt peace. Which is when I was a child. I underestimated like the whole adult, um, responsibility part. Like I, like I truly underestimated that as a child. Well, you want to know what? I went so much of my life thinking, well, then I'll get married.

• 37:32Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 37:33Paige DeSorbo?

  And then I'll be married. Like I ended a lot of sentences in my teens and twenties with, "And then I'll be married." And then one day I was just like, "That is actually just gonna cause more problems."

• 37:48Hannah Berner?

  Do you think I ruined your life?

• 37:53Hannah Berner?

  Like, I feel like-

• 37:54Paige DeSorbo?

  In what way?

• 37:55Hannah Berner?

  I just feel like subconsciously, when I met you, I hated so many people you were with.

• 38:00Paige DeSorbo?

  I thought you were gonna say I hated so many things about you that-

• 38:03Hannah Berner?

  No. I like, I put you on a pedestal and I see the men trying to like, dim your light.

• 38:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 38:11Hannah Berner?

  And I'm like, "If you don't fucking do what you're supposed to do, you're gonna be miserable." So, and then next thing you know, we're doing stuff and we're on a plane and you're like, "I could have had a family by now," but instead you were like, "Cheese your dreams."

• 38:24Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't blame you at all, but I think becoming friends with you helped me realize that I wanted to be louder more often than I was loud.

• 38:38Hannah Berner?

  Ooh.

• 38:39Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, I didn't realize I actually wanted to say more things, but I didn't know I could.

• 38:46Hannah Berner?

  Do you think confessionals also like helped you find your voice a little bit? Cause you didn't have to like say it in front of people?

• 38:52Paige DeSorbo?

  I think confessionals helped me realize that my comedic timing was better than other people's for like no apparent reason.

• 39:02Hannah Berner?

  I actually have a vivid memory of going in for confessionals and they were like, "Paige was in before you. She really killed it." She was so funny. And I was like, "Oh shit, okay, like I'm gonna be really funny." And then I'd try to say something funny and they're like, "No, you're actually really mad in this scene and you're crying, so we're gonna need you to be upset."

• 39:21Paige DeSorbo?

  The only thing that like would annoy me about those is they'd be like, "Well, she didn't say it in the moment and it's, and..." I'm like, yeah, because it was six months later. Like, I didn't think of it. Like, you know, so that was the, where people, they make it really do, they do make it seem like it's real time.

• 39:39Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, also, they're telling you to make a comment. You're not like, can I please speak on this? Like, that's how it seems.

• 39:46Paige DeSorbo?

  You're pulling from memory. You're not pulling from, like, what they're gonna show. You're pulling from your own experience. And sometimes, yeah, it's not, not sometimes, it's never gonna be what they show, because everyone's experience is individual. But whatever, I digress.

• 40:01Hannah Berner?

  I digress.

• 40:02Paige DeSorbo?

  Um, no, I think becoming friends with you is, was very pivotal in my, I don't even wanna say career, because that almost like dumbs it down. My whole life, my whole...

• 40:16Hannah Berner?

  But also, I didn't, like, change anything within you. I literally, like, I feel like, allowed you.

• 40:24Paige DeSorbo?

  I just thought I would like getting married.

• 40:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, I didn't know, the more I grew up, the, how in charge I wanted to be of things, and how controlling I am. So like, it was almost like you were like, it's okay, a lot of people actually hate it, and you don't have to do it if you don't want to.

• 40:46Hannah Berner?

  I'm more, though, was like, I'm fine with whoever you date, as long as you can chase your dreams. And I think you thought your dream was marriage, and then you started reprioritizing your dreams.

• 40:59Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes, and then I was like, wait, I think the biggest thing for me was really when I turned, in my early 30s, like, turned 30, on how...

• 41:07Hannah Berner?

  You're still in your early 30s.

• 41:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, how much I realized men are so incompetent. Like, I think that was the biggest change from me turning 29 to 30. I thought, like...

• 41:17Hannah Berner?

  Well, they're not gonna save you.

• 41:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Once you get into your 30s, and you're, like, men in their 40s, like, they're really competent. They know, they don't, they've, they've no idea, they know less than you. Some of the questions I've been asked before, from men, about, like, everyday life, would throw you off your rocker.

• 41:35Hannah Berner?

  I love when you say throw you off your rocker.

• 41:37Paige DeSorbo?

  It really get like, uh, simple things. Trying to think though of just like one, like.

• 41:43Hannah Berner?

  I was once in a car ride with one of my mom's friends and thinking back at it, I'm like, that was kinda crazy. But like, I was definitely young, like, and she looked at me and I think I asked her about her husband. Like, you know, you start realizing your mom's friends have like their own lives.

• 41:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 41:58Hannah Berner?

  And you're like, what's going on?

• 41:59Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, you're like, what do you do when you leave our house?

• 42:01Hannah Berner?

  And she told me, I really like him when we're on vacation. Like, my husband and I are really good on vacation, but otherwise, he's actually the worst. And men, you can never count on them for anything.

• 42:14Paige DeSorbo?

  My mom has a saying. Now, listen up, cause this is a good one.

• 42:19Hannah Berner?

  Listen up.

• 42:20Paige DeSorbo?

  Men, children and pets, they never act the way you want them to.

• 42:25Hannah Berner?

  Kim, Shakespeare, DeSorbo.

• 42:27Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm like, one time like Daphne did something, I legit think I was like hosting, so I don't know even know what I was doing. And I was like, and then she shit all over and she goes, well, it's just a lesson. Your husband, your kids and your pets are never gonna do what you want them to do.

• 42:45Hannah Berner?

  And the funniest part about this whole thing is I accidentally got married like five years ago.

• 42:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, and you got married. One time I called my mom and I didn't realize I was on speaker. And I was like, you wanna know what, mom? I'm really annoyed at you. And she was like, for what? And I was like, I think that it was your duty to tell me how useless men actually are. Like, no, seriously, mom, when's the last time a man was useful to you? See, I was like, in the last two weeks, has dad done something that was so pivotal in your life? And she goes, Paige, you're on speaker. Hey. Hey?

• 43:19Hannah Berner?

  Paige, this is Thanksgiving.

• 43:20Paige DeSorbo?

  And I was like, no, let's, if we're really gonna talk about it, let's actually talk about it. Name one thing.

• 43:28Paige DeSorbo?

  And she's like, actually, like, your dad does do a lot of that. I go, nay, mom. Nay, mom.

• 43:34Paige DeSorbo?

  I was like, I wasn't even talking about him. I was just talking about men in general. I think that was the biggest shock in my 30s. That I thought they were like, I just thought they were doing more out here. I thought they were out here doing.

• 43:47Hannah Berner?

  Well, they were doing more when we weren't allowed to do as much.

• 43:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, then all of a sudden, your friends start having babies and they're telling you their birth stories and they're like, I'm on all fours. I'm doing, I'm doing no epidural. I'm talking to a girl yesterday. She's like, I'm pregnant with twins and I'm deciding if I'm doing it natural. Like, we're just so much better. Once you start bringing in labor, I'm like, where do you guys compete with us? Where do you measure up in anything? It's too much for me to handle. I'm also on one today. I got, I had a lot of emails that pissed me off right before I got on the pod.

• 44:23Hannah Berner?

  We're so connected. You didn't even start talking. I got on. I was like five minutes late. And you, I could just tell by your energy, I was like, oh, she wants to murder. I was like, good morning.

• 44:38Hannah Berner?

  How are you?

• 44:39Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, I love everyone that works at Daphne. Like, truly feel like I, they're my friends when I have to do stuff. People don't tell you the relationships you will form in your 30s through like your coworkers. They don't talk about it like seriously as friendship. Like, no, those are real friendships in your 30s that you would have never met in your 20s.

• 45:03Hannah Berner?

  Because I had so many jobs, though, in my 20s, I really did, like, always have, like, an office.

• 45:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Camaraderie.

• 45:10Hannah Berner?

  Wife. Yeah. That like, will still text me to this day and be like, lol, do you remember when we were in the bathroom crying? I think work, coworkers, but that's why people fall in love at work all the time, too, because you're like, you just become bonded.

• 45:25Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 45:26Hannah Berner?

  And that's why I think even on some of these reality shows, you're a bunch of coworkers.

• 45:31Paige DeSorbo?

  Trauma bonded over something.

• 45:33Hannah Berner?

  Trauma bonded over stuff.

• 45:35Paige DeSorbo?

  Other than us, we're sisters.

• 45:38Hannah Berner?

  We're sisters. We're trad wife sisters.

• 45:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Soulmates Hannah. Did you think the first time you met me, like, that is my soulmate?

• 45:45Hannah Berner?

  No, but I knew that like, there was something about you that I wanted to like bother you.

• 45:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 45:51Hannah Berner?

  Like, you know when like for some reason you're like, I want to talk to this person?

• 45:54Paige DeSorbo?

  And for me, there was something about you that I was really comfortable with. Like, I didn't feel like I had to perform for you, which is so funny because all we do together is perform. But like, one on one, I was like, I don't have to be anything but myself with this girl.

• 46:12Hannah Berner?

  By the way, when I say we didn't think we were soulmates, I meant like when I first met you very briefly at an office when you were like trying to get a meeting and you were like standing there.

• 46:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 46:22Hannah Berner?

  But the second we walked into Summer House, I actually remember someone being like Paige. To me, they were like, we're kind of worried about Paige. Like, she fell asleep the whole day. And like, we need her to bring it. And I remember like being a little defensive of you and like, I didn't even know you. And I remember being like, she's fine. She's gonna be fine. She clearly, she's in REM sleep right now. But when she wakes up, she's, I was like, don't fucking talk about my friend like that. Mind you, it was literally one day and you slept the whole time.

• 46:55Paige DeSorbo?

  She's actually really smart once you get to know her.

• 46:57Hannah Berner?

  I remember, and like, look, did you sleep like the entire dinner? Yes. Was it? Yes.

• 47:02Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, and now you know that I am nervous narcolepsy.

• 47:05Hannah Berner?

  You know what it is, though? When you go through hard times, and it's the same with relationships. You go through hard times and two people decide, do we want to make this work or not?

• 47:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 47:15Hannah Berner?

  And after you decide like a bunch of times, you're like, okay, we're obsessed with each other. Like, we can handle things. But that's your 30s, like.

• 47:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, because I do think sometimes people are like, oh, that's my friend from work or something. And they like, almost like brush it off, like, oh, it's a work relationship. But sometimes I feel like that is the universe, like putting you in these search, different situations where it's like, no, this could be a lifelong friend that you've just, you've met a little later. Like, I think we should put more effort into our work friendships, because I think they're more important than people ever give credit to.

• 47:49Hannah Berner?

  Oh my god, I, I had some of my best friends were at work.

• 47:52Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 47:53Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, because also you have a common goal. You have common things you complain about, like it's literally perfect. I love having a work crush. But also I do have to say, the reason I'm so happy I'm not in my teens and twenties anymore, is because when something bad happens to you, it's the first time something like this has ever happened. And you're like, this is how I die. Like, this is the end for me. I don't see a path out of this. Where in your thirties, you're like, this has happened to me four times already.

• 48:17Paige DeSorbo?

  Right.

• 48:18Hannah Berner?

  And I know exactly how to deal with this.

• 48:20Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 48:20Hannah Berner?

  So like, everything just is a little less painful in your thirties. And I just want all the girls to look forward to that.

• 48:27Paige DeSorbo?

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• 49:11Paige DeSorbo?

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• 49:55Paige DeSorbo?

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• 50:39Paige DeSorbo?

  I love that Colgate Optic White Pro Series Toothpaste works on those everyday stains while still being enamel safe for daily use. It's proof that daily routine can be remarkable. That's the science of wow. Colgate Optic White. Today's episode is sponsored by SoFi, the everything app for smarter money. We won Podcast of the Year, we wrote a book, we have a tour, we have a company. Technically, we are businesswoman now. And honestly, that's terrifying because you don't build a company out of giggling without eventually having to learn how money works. We learned in public, mostly by getting things wrong at first, like finding out our money could be earning money just by sitting there. Because apparently, having money sit in a checking account doing absolutely nothing is not a financial strategy. That's where SoFi can help.

• 51:25Paige DeSorbo?

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• 52:07Paige DeSorbo?

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• 52:12Hannah Berner?

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• 52:55Hannah Berner?

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• 53:08Hannah Berner?

  Remember when I was nervous about my pimple?

• 53:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Which one?

• 53:11Hannah Berner?

  Well, I had a huge pimple before I was supposed to shoot something and then it went down in two days.

• 53:18Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, the one you recently had on your forehead that you said that you put toothpaste on it really pissed me off.

• 53:23Hannah Berner?

  But that's karma.

• 53:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 53:25Hannah Berner?

  That's my karma, guys. Like you wonder, like it's called peaceful sleeping and pimples just going away for no reason. That's from kindness and love.

• 53:33Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm over here putting a million needles every four seconds into my skin. You know, I watched a TikTok video the other day of it was like an animation of what microneedling actually is.

• 53:47Hannah Berner?

  You loved it?

• 53:47Paige DeSorbo?

  I loved it, Hannah. I loved it.

• 53:52Hannah Berner?

  Wait, why do they have to numb your face like cuz it's that painful?

• 53:56Paige DeSorbo?

  Hell yeah. It's so, it's going so, it's low key going deep, kind of. Because it's basically hurting your whole face so that your collagen is like, oh my god, we have to repair the skin. And it like boosts your collagen. It's like tricking your skin into thinking it's hurt.

• 54:18Hannah Berner?

  You sound like the looks maxer.

• 54:21Paige DeSorbo?

  I sound like Klavikular?

• 54:23Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, you're like if you stab yourself in the face enough, your skin gets stronger.

• 54:26Paige DeSorbo?

  And maybe that's why I find him so annoying. I'm like, do not come.

• 54:30Hannah Berner?

  Your jaws up his jawline?

• 54:31Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm like, do not come for our aesthetic. Women for tens of thousands of years have been saying beauty is pain. Do not come over here.

• 54:40Hannah Berner?

  I'm like nervous to get microneedling even though I have to.

• 54:43Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I love it. You have to do it.

• 54:46Hannah Berner?

  So the rest of the day, are you just like a freak?

• 54:48Paige DeSorbo?

  No, oh my god, mine, like I'm red for like maybe an hour. One of my girlfriends got it done and she was red for, this is just how people are like very, she was red for like five hours. And I was red for like two.

• 55:03Hannah Berner?

  Also, a quick update. I talked about Pepper. I wanted a cat named Pepper. I want to call it Cat Pepper. Turns out every giggler's cat's name is Pepper. I've gotten like a hundred photos of cats named Pepper.

• 55:15Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't remember you mentioning this.

• 55:17Hannah Berner?

  Well, I did.

• 55:17Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 55:18Hannah Berner?

  And it was a really pivotal point in the podcast, but that's okay. Um, it's literally been all I talked about two weeks ago, but um, they, there's so many cute cats named Pepper. So I just have to say shout out to everyone who named their cat Pepper.

• 55:32Paige DeSorbo?

  It would be really cute, like Pepper, Lemon and Pepper, like thinking if you got like an orange cat, you named it Lemon. And then you got like a black cat, you named it Pepper.

• 55:42Hannah Berner?

  I love how you say orange.

• 55:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Orange.

• 55:45Hannah Berner?

  We have to discuss Ethan and Ariana.

• 55:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Now, why did she take that lady's husband if she didn't want him? Why did she do that?

• 55:57Hannah Berner?

  I love how you just say what everyone's afraid to say.

• 55:59Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, you didn't need that man. You didn't want that man. You didn't care about that man. Let that man go be with his wife and child.

• 56:06Hannah Berner?

  That's why her song, which is "I Hate That I Made You Love Me", everyone's like, "We think it's about the fans." I'm like, "No."

• 56:14Paige DeSorbo?

  I think it's about her three-long-year affair. I think he's weak and disgusting. Like, I think if you can leave your wife and a newborn baby, like, what conviction do you have in this world? Like, who are you as a person?

• 56:27Hannah Berner?

  I heard that in the theater community, because he's like one of the three straight men. He's like, wanted. Like, everyone's like, "He's hot." So, in the theater worlds.

• 56:38Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, so a made-up realm. But, um, so you think he's like a toxic fuckboy? Because he's like, he only lives in the theater world, where people are like, "You're so hot and you're so cool and like, we want you." Where if he went and worked, like...

• 56:53Hannah Berner?

  In finance.

• 56:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah. He'd have a very different experience.

• 56:57Hannah Berner?

  He'd be hazed. I think that's why he even had the confidence. And she loves musical theater. Like, I'm trying to make sense of it.

• 57:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, like, that he had the confidence to even cheat on his wife?

• 57:06Hannah Berner?

  With Ariana Grande. Like, at some point, you're like, "Actually, this is..." Like, I have a hot take.

• 57:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 57:13Hannah Berner?

  And this could be completely wrong.

• 57:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 57:15Hannah Berner?

  But I think Ariana Grande has a little Justin Bieber to her, where she doesn't have any dopamine left, because she's done so many things in her career that are so spectacular and intense and amazing. So, for her to feel something, she has to, like, steal someone's...

• 57:32Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, do you want to hear my argument? I argue that Ariana Grande went through a very public breakup with Mac Miller, and then ultimately, he died. Not shortly thereafter, there was a shooting at one of her concerts.

• 57:51Hannah Berner?

  So traumatizing.

• 57:53Paige DeSorbo?

  That is two really extremely traumatizing canon events, I would assume. And...

• 58:02Paige DeSorbo?

  I would think that your whole brain chemistry is rewired after both of those things, let alone like them back to back. Cause you don't know how long it takes people to actually grieve and like actually get through traumatic things and process things. And like, I would say a shooting at your concert where little girls die is like years and years of like actually working through that. And I could see her being like a little, like she cha- like, I don't know, like she got me disconnected and so almost doesn't feel like, hey, you just stole this lady's husband and you did like a really bad, morally bad thing. Like cheating is bad, like you shouldn't have participated in that. And I could see her almost like not even, like, okay, we want to know what something

• 58:47Paige DeSorbo?

  bad is? Something bad is someone dying. Like falling in love actually isn't bad. You know, I could see that being part of...

• 58:55Hannah Berner?

  By the way, we don't know anything about it.

• 58:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Also, we're making this up.

• 58:58Hannah Berner?

  We're making this up. This is all made up. But also like, I would love to be a fly on the wall when Ethan is going to like co-parent. And she's like, hey, how's, how's Ariana?

• 59:09Paige DeSorbo?

  Or just like, your kid growing up and being like, why did you guys get divorced? And be like, well, your dad left me for Ariana Grande.

• 59:17Hannah Berner?

  A pop star. And she played with him like a cat for about two, two and a half years. But it's funny how it's like the second wicked is over. Like give it two months and it's, that's a, that's a work wife.

• 59:31Paige DeSorbo?

  That's a work wife.

• 59:32Hannah Berner?

  Why don't you just be normal and just cheat and not tell your wife like a normal person in Hollywood?

• 59:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Have sex at a hotel, you freaks. Like, what? Also, my thing is like, no one...

• 59:46Hannah Berner?

  I love a dramatic pause.

• 59:48Paige DeSorbo?

  I was just trying to like think how I, I've had some really good sex in my life. Of course, of course. I've also had some really non-eventful sex in my life. No one that I've ever had sex with would be worth blowing up my whole life, would be worth like ruining this other woman's life. I don't get, I don't get that.

• 1:00:13Hannah Berner?

  It is funny.

• 1:00:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Actually, when I lost my virginity and I told my mom, I think I actually said like, and I don't really get the hype about sex. And I feel like she looked at me like, yeah, I get that.

• 1:00:23Hannah Berner?

  I feel like when you're younger, we were so afraid to talk about sex and the Gen Z's are probably different. Well, I don't even know if they're having sex, but like, do you remember when your friends would talk about it for like, the first couple of years, like, she gave it handjob, she gave a BJ, but no one was like telling each other, like, she lost her virginity, but no one was like, it's really bad. Like, when did we start? Was it in college? I don't even know in college, because we still would be like, we're hooking up, like, we're hooking up, but we weren't being open with each other that like,

• 1:00:53Hannah Berner?

  the sex would, maybe we'd be like, oh, he's a small dick.

• 1:00:55Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't even think I started calling men out for having a small dick until I was like later in college, where I like said to my friend, I think he might have a small dick, but like, I don't know.

• 1:01:07Hannah Berner?

  I remember once, this was like, early twenties, this guy just got out of a really long relationship, and we went back to my place, and I guess he was trying to like, sorry mom, like, finger me.

• 1:01:17Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:17Hannah Berner?

  But he was like, he actually, I'm not even joking, was on like, the muscle that connects my leg and my vagina.

• 1:01:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Mm-hmm, yeah, that like bone.

• 1:01:28Paige DeSorbo?

  I know exactly.

• 1:01:30Hannah Berner?

  And at first, I was like, okay, he's, he's teasing me, he's teasing me.

• 1:01:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Like the fold, like the dip in which your thigh connects to your actual vag. I know exactly what you're talking about.

• 1:01:41Hannah Berner?

  And then it like went on like a little too long, and then I realized, oh, he thinks he hit the spot. And then I immediately thought about his girlfriend who he's been with for like, seven years, who he just got out of a relationship with, and I was like, she either didn't know, or she didn't want to speak up, or like, how this happened. So, girls, we have to speak up. But I remember telling my friend, like, he fingered my thigh, and I was, I was so funny that night. I had a great night, was killing.

• 1:02:08Paige DeSorbo?

  It's so important, because also, that is like gossiping, and that's what keeps women like, alive. Like, I think, I mean, I had such a good mom, though. Thank God, I felt comfortable enough to go to my mom to be like, hey, like, I think I have, like, it's burning when I pee, like, and that's what it is, like, so can you help me? But like, if I was nervous, I would never know.

• 1:02:34Hannah Berner?

  Well, that's like Whitney in, in Housewives, I mean, in Mormon Wives, when she's like, Mom, why couldn't you tell me what sex was? I had it figured out on my wedding night, and it was a fucking horror, horror film. And I'm like, yeah, that's why you have to talk to people for safety and pleasure and understanding. We're not holes. We're not just holes.

• 1:02:56Paige DeSorbo?

  Do you want to hear something so crazy about when I told my mom that I wasn't a virgin anymore?

• 1:03:01Hannah Berner?

  You never told me this before.

• 1:03:04Paige DeSorbo?

  Now, thinking back, I must have had a UTI because I literally made myself sick thinking that I had like an STD.

• 1:03:13Hannah Berner?

  Oh, yeah, everyone thinks that.

• 1:03:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Like literally, like I couldn't sleep. Like I was like sick. I was like, I have to tell my mom. Like, oh my God, like, I'll never forget. I'm like,

• 1:03:22Hannah Berner?

  Because you're like, I'm gonna die and she doesn't know it's because of herpes.

• 1:03:25Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm a senior in high school and I like go, I'll never forget. It was like being a little kid going down into the kitchen. Like I threw up. I was like, mom? And she, I'll never forget. She was ironing and I was like, I have to tell you, which is so classic Italian mom. She's like, she's like, what? I'm like, okay. So like something is like kind of happening with like my vagina and like I don't know what's going on. And like, and she, I remember her like staring at me and I'm like, and like I had sex. And I remember whispering like sex.

• 1:04:00Paige DeSorbo?

  So like anxiety made me tell her, not like our amazing relationship and bond.

• 1:04:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Just anxiety.

• 1:04:06Hannah Berner?

  We were so different because my mom was like, you should probably have sex by now.

• 1:04:10Paige DeSorbo?

  And she was like, okay, well, what's going on? Do you want to show me? Like, and so like that. And ultimately, I think I probably had like a little bit of a UTI. And she was like, just drink water and like, we'll see what happens. And like, nothing happens. But couple of weeks later, maybe like, I'd have to call Stephanie and like really figure out the story because I won't remember. I got into a fight with one of my girlfriends in high school. Who knows about what, but we were like really fighting. Okay. Like to the point where she like called my house phone and I'll never forget. I've spoken to her since this, like obviously,

• 1:04:47Hannah Berner?

  She called your house phone to hash it out, like after school?

• 1:04:51Paige DeSorbo?

  No. She called my house phone and I'll never forget answering and being like, hello. And her being like, let me talk to your mom. And I'm like, no, you're not talking to my mom, you freak.

• 1:05:03Paige DeSorbo?

  I feel comfortable saying this because her and I are like friends. So like thinking back, it's like so funny. I'm like, you're not talking to my mommy freak. Like, what are you gonna say to my mom? And I'll never forget.

• 1:05:13Hannah Berner?

  She was gonna, she was gonna spill the beans.

• 1:05:15Paige DeSorbo?

  She starts yelling, Paige actually isn't a virgin and she did fuck her boyfriend. And I remember being like, oh, how dare you.

• 1:05:25Hannah Berner?

  See, are you trying to ruin my life? I'm an angel.

• 1:05:29Paige DeSorbo?

  And I'll never forget, my mom heard it and got on the phone and was like, hey, you guys are having a fight and that's your friend. You don't go and try and like tell on her. And I remember being like, fuck yeah, mom, like.

• 1:05:42Hannah Berner?

  And then she hung up and she was like, we have to talk.

• 1:05:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, and then she hung up and she was like, what are you doing?

• 1:05:46Hannah Berner?

  She goes, what's up slut?

• 1:05:50Paige DeSorbo?

  But anyway, that's just like girlhood and.

• 1:05:52Hannah Berner?

  We love, Paige loves nostalgia. She's working on it in her therapy later this week. Actually, this is her therapy session. Um, thank you guys so much for. Yeah, we're done. Thank you for giggling with us. Um, keep sending me photos from the Hulu special. Um, happy anniversary to Daphne, baby.

• 1:06:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:06:13Hannah Berner?

  And you don't Daff Daff, not the cat, the company. And we'll talk to you later. Bye.

• 1:06:24Speaker 03

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• 1:06:54Hannah Berner?

  Hey, it's Hannah and Paige. Thank you so much for tuning into Giggly Squad every week.

• 1:06:58Paige DeSorbo?

  If you want to hear new episodes ad free, subscribe to Sirius XM Podcast Plus on Apple Podcast or visit siriusxm.com/podcastplus to listen on Spotify or another app of your choice.